KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: boomdrum on May 02, 2013, 09:21:00 AM
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Hey everybody, just signed up on the site yesterday.
I'm 48 yrs old and started dipping at 13. Stopped for several years at age 30, but slipped on a camping/fishing trip and was sucked back into the addiction..
Ready to kick this for good...
Last dip was yesterday morning about 7:00 AM.
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Hey everybody, just signed up on the site yesterday.
I'm 48 yrs old and started dipping at 13. Stopped for several years at age 30, but slipped on a camping/fishing trip and was sucked back into the addiction..
Ready to kick this for good...
Last dip was yesterday morning about 7:00 AM.
Well done for making one of the best choices of your life
Comming from a 42 year old, who dipped for 23+ years I would not have given myself good odds to quit, but with this site, and 305 days ago when I flushed my last, I am quit and owe it to this site.
Now do not look too far ahead. Just focus on today, as I still do. Each day I give my word and then honor that word by staying quit (heck there is quite a bit that I can do for 1 day without problem). That is all then repeat. It will be a wild ride for you as your mind and body will be reprogramming itself, so give it time and hold on.
You can do this. PM me if you need anything
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Welcome to ktc and congrats on quitting!!! I will quit with you any day and all day. You should try to keep some gum, seeds, hard candy, tooth picks or fake chew with you at all times for when those cravings hit. Read all the intro's and hall of fame speeches and you will find that we have all went through what your going through. If you need anything at all feel free to pm me.
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Thanks so much guys. Stocked up on Jolly Ranchers and sunflower seeds yesterday.
Very little sleep last night, so will try some Melatonin tonight.
So glad I came across this site. :)
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Thanks so much guys. Stocked up on Jolly Ranchers and sunflower seeds yesterday.
Very little sleep last night, so will try some Melatonin tonight.
So glad I came across this site. :)
Boom, welcome to the site! Remember these early days, they will be the key for you later. I quit with you, reach out if you need anything.
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Atomic fireballs. Get some :)
Welcome in dude. You won't do this alone. Newbie or Vet, we all do this the same as you... One day at a time. Quitting right along with you... PM if you need anything. Rock it, bro...
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Well done, Boomdrum! Embrace the suck! Turn the tables on the Nic Bitch. Laugh at that withdrawals and the craves. You're in charge now...not her.
Withdrawal symptoms are a privilege reserved to those who have the guts to post roll and keep their word. You GET to feel this crappy because YOU had the guts to quit. They are the feeling of freedom.
One day at a time, brother. YOU CAN DO THIS!!!
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Hey Boomdrum. Welcome to the party. You have had some pretty good advice so far, so I will just add a little information that you might find usefull in the next few days, weeks or months. Check the upper top right of your screen and you will see an "inbox". Open it, as I have sent you my cell number. Store the number and call me when you feel the need to talk to someone or before you feel like going to the store to get a can. This is one of the safe-guard mechanisms we use here to help each other out. You will get alot more numbers from others and you will mentor others as well. I used tobacco for 45 years, so I guess I am a little bit qualified to speak about its addictive qualities...and I quit 167 days ago with help from this site and the folks on here. Welcome aboard.
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You guys rock! Jolly Ranchers, seeds and Smoky Mountain helped me through today. Totally getting some Atomic Fireballs!
Thanks again!
Wmcatty, got your PM. Thanks, bro.
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You guys rock! Jolly Ranchers, seeds and Smoky Mountain helped me through today. Totally getting some Atomic Fireballs!
Thanks again!
Wmcatty, got your PM. Thanks, bro.
You rock bro....I feel a strong quitter here.....
Right now you are operating on adrenaline and excitement.....which is awesome!! but strap in....cuz its going to be a wild ride....
You got this....
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You guys rock! Jolly Ranchers, seeds and Smoky Mountain helped me through today. Totally getting some Atomic Fireballs!
Thanks again!
Wmcatty, got your PM. Thanks, bro.
Good to have you boomdrum. You won't be sorry. Taking your life back is the greatest. I took my life back 76 days ago,, and I also started at a young age. It's not been easy, but it's been so worth it. Life is so much better without the can. Your going to go through a lot of changes in the next couple weeks. All that's happening is your body is fixing what you have been messing up for umpteen years. Glad to be quit with you. Take your life back one day at a time.
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Check your PM for my digits.
Don't forget the Live Chat if you go berserk. I used on numerous occasions and it helped. Just keep your head down through the fog and take out your frustrations on us instead of your family.
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Thanks so much guys. Stocked up on Jolly Ranchers and sunflower seeds yesterday.
Very little sleep last night, so will try some Melatonin tonight.
So glad I came across this site. :)
Welcome to the site it is the best site I know of and owe my future to it I quit with you. I will pm you my digits
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Bitchin' job postin' roll dude :)
Don't let yourself get lazy. Keep reading, be involved, MAKE FRIENDS, be active in your quit. Head over to chat, it really does help to pass the time. Again, if you need anything... right here for ya man. Know what?... I quit with you today! Rock it bro...
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Happy Memorial Day! I'm 27 days nic-free today.
The Great Escape is my favorite war movie. People like to complain about Hollywood and Television, etc...but damnit if they didn't give us some great war movies. Steve McQueen is the coolest.
I've never been in the military, but I'm in a battle with a 35-year addiction to nicotine. 27 days in and I'm winning. I'm fucking Steve McQueen digging through the nicotine tunnel!!
Thank you to all who serve/have served our country and communities!
Let's keep quit and make the great escape together!
Ironically, Steve McQueen may have died from cancer caused by activities while serving our country...God bless Steve McQueen.
From: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steve_McQueen#Death (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steve_McQueen#Death)
A few months before his death, McQueen had given a medical interview in which he blamed his condition on asbestos exposure.[68] While McQueen felt asbestos used in movie soundstage insulation and race-drivers' protective suits and helmets could have been involved, he believed his illness was a direct result of massive exposure while removing asbestos lagging from pipes aboard a troop ship during his time in the Marines.[69][70]
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Thanks BD, I am movie illiterate and will rent that one and watching it will have more significance because of your post. Also I look forward to my next day free of Nicotine. Sometimes a good movie does a lot to adjust the proper perspective.
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Thanks BD, I am movie illiterate and will rent that one and watching it will have more significance because of your post. Also I look forward to my next day free of Nicotine. Sometimes a good movie does a lot to adjust the proper perspective.
Hi Matt! This movie is an oldie, but a goodie. McQueen won best actor in '63. The TV series Hogan's Heroes was based on this movie. The movie was also based on a true story!
Good luck in your quit my friend and let me know if can help in any way.
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I am addicted to being quit with guys like you Boomdrum.
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I am addicted to guys like you Boomdrum.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
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I am addicted to guys like you Boomdrum.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Lmafao. Yea well since no one knows my wife (that i am aware of) I'll admit to being addicted to all you guys! Don't tell my wife lol!
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I am addicted to guys like you Boomdrum.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Lmafao. Yea well since no one knows my wife (that i am aware of) I'll admit to being addicted to all you guys! Don't tell my wife lol!
Thooper Ghey!
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I am addicted to guys like you Boomdrum.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Lmafao. Yea well since no one knows my wife (that i am aware of) I'll admit to being addicted to all you guys! Don't tell my wife lol!
Thooper Ghey!
Whatch it.... Applejack,,,, you are my favorite cereal.
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I am addicted to guys like you Boomdrum.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Lmafao. Yea well since no one knows my wife (that i am aware of) I'll admit to being addicted to all you guys! Don't tell my wife lol!
Thooper Ghey!
Whatch it.... Applejack,,,, you are my favorite cereal.
I don't know whether to laugh or run away!! 'crackup'
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I am addicted to guys like you Boomdrum.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Lmafao. Yea well since no one knows my wife (that i am aware of) I'll admit to being addicted to all you guys! Don't tell my wife lol!
Thooper Ghey!
Whatch it.... Applejack,,,, you are my favorite cereal.
I don't know whether to laugh or run away!! 'crackup'
At this point I am not sure myself what is best for you to do lol.
Boomdrum, sorry we took over your thread lol.
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Yesterday was Day 30 for me! Still quit and feeling good.
My Day 30 was unusual....I walked outside to hop in my car to go to work. Noticed my rear glass on my SUV was shattered. Looked at my wife's car and her's was shattered too. Vandals!
So...my day yesterday was spent with police reports, insurance companies, glass repair, and body shops.
31 days ago I would have been a dipping fiend throughout all that stress. Really had no temptation to cave yesterday. Fuck you nicotine. 'Finger'
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Yesterday was Day 30 for me! Still quit and feeling good.
My Day 30 was unusual....I walked outside to hop in my car to go to work. Noticed my rear glass on my SUV was shattered. Looked at my wife's car and her's was shattered too. Vandals!
So...my day yesterday was spent with police reports, insurance companies, glass repair, and body shops.
31 days ago I would have been a dipping fiend throughout all that stress. Really had no temptation to cave yesterday. Fuck you nicotine. 'Finger'
Nice. Funny how we thought that dip lowered our blood pressure, when it actually did the opposite making stressful days that much worse. Good work on day 30 and here's to today 'Cheers'
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Yesterday was Day 30 for me! Still quit and feeling good.
My Day 30 was unusual....I walked outside to hop in my car to go to work. Noticed my rear glass on my SUV was shattered. Looked at my wife's car and her's was shattered too. Vandals!Â
So...my day yesterday was spent with police reports, insurance companies, glass repair, and body shops.
31 days ago I would have been a dipping fiend throughout all that stress. Really had no temptation to cave yesterday. Fuck you nicotine. 'Finger'
Nice. Funny how we thought that dip lowered our blood pressure, when it actually did the opposite making stressful days that much worse. Good work on day 30 and here's to today 'Cheers'
I like hearing stuff like this. Its great when the light bulb goes off and we realize Nicotine doesn't help anything. I know you've had better days, but my worst day without a dip is better than my best day with one. Seeing we both posted and we got nothing better to do, I say we stay quit today my friend.
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Going through some pretty heavy emotional shit right now. Just told my wife of 18 yrs that our marriage was over. I can't spend as much time on KTC as I would like, but I have support outside of here to help me through this. I feel like my quit is strong and I will continue to post roll and stay connected here as much as I can.
I sense a lot of hostility towards those who don't post frequently and make a ton of friends on here. I'm dealing with and cleaning up several areas of my life and don't have time and energy to emerge as an August leader and give back the way I would like right now. My apologies...
I don't want to feel guilty for using this site. This is not a "planned cave" and I am not a pussy.
Thank you for your support...
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Going through some pretty heavy emotional shit right now. Just told my wife of 18 yrs that our marriage was over. I can't spend as much time on KTC as I would like, but I have support outside of here to help me through this. I feel like my quit is strong and I will continue to post roll and stay connected here as much as I can.
I sense a lot of hostility towards those who don't post frequently and make a ton of friends on here. I'm dealing with and cleaning up several areas of my life and don't have time and energy to emerge as an August leader and give back the way I would like right now. My apologies...
I don't want to feel guilty for using this site. This is not a "planned cave" and I am not a pussy.
Thank you for your support...
dude...you have mine...i'll pm you my number and if you want to shoot me a text you can and i'll post up for you.
Sorry to hear about the marriage, i unfortunately have gone through that twice. Anyhow, happiness is out there. Quit on
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Going through some pretty heavy emotional shit right now. Just told my wife of 18 yrs that our marriage was over. I can't spend as much time on KTC as I would like, but I have support outside of here to help me through this.  I feel like my quit is strong and I will continue to post roll and stay connected here as much as I can.Â
I sense a lot of hostility towards those who don't post frequently and make a ton of friends on here. I'm dealing with and cleaning up several areas of my life and don't have time and energy to emerge as an August leader and give back the way I would like right now. My apologies...
I don't want to feel guilty for using this site. This is not a "planned cave" and I am not a pussy.Â
Thank you for your support...
dude...you have mine...i'll pm you my number and if you want to shoot me a text you can and i'll post up for you.
Sorry to hear about the marriage, i unfortunately have gone through that twice. Anyhow, happiness is out there. Quit on
let us know if you need anything bro.... You have proven you have balls by being quit! Keep those balls intact! I cant relate to what your going through but we are here for you if you want to vent or need an ear!
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Going through some pretty heavy emotional shit right now. Just told my wife of 18 yrs that our marriage was over. I can't spend as much time on KTC as I would like, but I have support outside of here to help me through this. I feel like my quit is strong and I will continue to post roll and stay connected here as much as I can.
I sense a lot of hostility towards those who don't post frequently and make a ton of friends on here. I'm dealing with and cleaning up several areas of my life and don't have time and energy to emerge as an August leader and give back the way I would like right now. My apologies...
I don't want to feel guilty for using this site. This is not a "planned cave" and I am not a pussy.
Thank you for your support...
Boomdrum,
First no one says you have to be as involved as another, it is suggested as it improves your chances of staying quit. However it is by no means mandatory.
Second hate to hear that stuff going on. Anything I can do....well...u have my #. Don't hesitate.
Third. Make roll no matter what. If you can't text me and I I'll post for you. Don't take a chance. It only takes twenty seconds. Continue to post roll.
Forth if you do miss roll, well.. Sorry.. But I coming looking for you man. I care about you and your quit man so sorry but I can't let you go. As for making a ton of friends you already have friends, I am one of them. We understand your going thru some shit right now and will b less involved....cool,,,, missing roll no way, we just can't let you do that. And you tell yourself this message from Erussell sometime today while looking in the mirror, "Boomdrum your a fucking bad ass quitter". I quit like fuck with you Boomdrum!
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Going through some pretty heavy emotional shit right now. Just told my wife of 18 yrs that our marriage was over. I can't spend as much time on KTC as I would like, but I have support outside of here to help me through this.  I feel like my quit is strong and I will continue to post roll and stay connected here as much as I can.Â
I sense a lot of hostility towards those who don't post frequently and make a ton of friends on here. I'm dealing with and cleaning up several areas of my life and don't have time and energy to emerge as an August leader and give back the way I would like right now. My apologies...
I don't want to feel guilty for using this site.  This is not a "planned cave" and I am not a pussy.Â
Thank you for your support...
Boomdrum,
First no one says you have to be as involved as another, it is suggested as it improves your chances of staying quit. However it is by no means mandatory.
Second hate to hear that stuff going on. Anything I can do....well...u have my #. Don't hesitate.
Third. Make roll no matter what. If you can't text me and I I'll post for you. Don't take a chance. It only takes twenty seconds. Continue to post roll.
Forth if you do miss roll, well.. Sorry.. But I coming looking for you man. I care about you and your quit man so sorry but I can't let you go. As for making a ton of friends you already have friends, I am one of them. We understand your going thru some shit right now and will b less involved....cool,,,, missing roll no way, we just can't let you do that. And you tell yourself this message from Erussell sometime today while looking in the mirror, "Boomdrum your a fucking bad ass quitter". I quit like fuck with you Boomdrum!
Listen to Erussell brother. It sounds like it's to late to just act like we don't exist. You've already made friends. Friends don't treat friends like that. Take care of your business, but we ask that you keep us around also. Just a little roll post everyday. My guess is your going to get on the computer once a day for something. It usually can be done from your phone also,, depending on what phone you have. Point being,, we don't except that your not going to be around enough to post roll. Get it done and we'll be quit right beside you brother.
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Going through some pretty heavy emotional shit right now. Just told my wife of 18 yrs that our marriage was over. I can't spend as much time on KTC as I would like, but I have support outside of here to help me through this.  I feel like my quit is strong and I will continue to post roll and stay connected here as much as I can.Â
I sense a lot of hostility towards those who don't post frequently and make a ton of friends on here. I'm dealing with and cleaning up several areas of my life and don't have time and energy to emerge as an August leader and give back the way I would like right now. My apologies...
I don't want to feel guilty for using this site.  This is not a "planned cave" and I am not a pussy.Â
Thank you for your support...
Boomdrum,
First no one says you have to be as involved as another, it is suggested as it improves your chances of staying quit. However it is by no means mandatory.
Second hate to hear that stuff going on. Anything I can do....well...u have my #. Don't hesitate.
Third. Make roll no matter what. If you can't text me and I I'll post for you. Don't take a chance. It only takes twenty seconds. Continue to post roll.
Forth if you do miss roll, well.. Sorry.. But I coming looking for you man. I care about you and your quit man so sorry but I can't let you go. As for making a ton of friends you already have friends, I am one of them. We understand your going thru some shit right now and will b less involved....cool,,,, missing roll no way, we just can't let you do that. And you tell yourself this message from Erussell sometime today while looking in the mirror, "Boomdrum your a fucking bad ass quitter". I quit like fuck with you Boomdrum!
Listen to Erussell brother. It sounds like it's to late to just act like we don't exist. You've already made friends. Friends don't treat friends like that. Take care of your business, but we ask that you keep us around also. Just a little roll post everyday. My guess is your going to get on the computer once a day for something. It usually can be done from your phone also,, depending on what phone you have. Point being,, we don't except that your not going to be around enough to post roll. Get it done and we'll be quit right beside you brother.
Thanks guys. I'm not going anywhere. You have my word.
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Going through some pretty heavy emotional shit right now. Just told my wife of 18 yrs that our marriage was over. I can't spend as much time on KTC as I would like, but I have support outside of here to help me through this.  I feel like my quit is strong and I will continue to post roll and stay connected here as much as I can.Â
I sense a lot of hostility towards those who don't post frequently and make a ton of friends on here. I'm dealing with and cleaning up several areas of my life and don't have time and energy to emerge as an August leader and give back the way I would like right now. My apologies...
I don't want to feel guilty for using this site.  This is not a "planned cave" and I am not a pussy.Â
Thank you for your support...
Boomdrum,
First no one says you have to be as involved as another, it is suggested as it improves your chances of staying quit. However it is by no means mandatory.
Second hate to hear that stuff going on. Anything I can do....well...u have my #. Don't hesitate.
Third. Make roll no matter what. If you can't text me and I I'll post for you. Don't take a chance. It only takes twenty seconds. Continue to post roll.
Forth if you do miss roll, well.. Sorry.. But I coming looking for you man. I care about you and your quit man so sorry but I can't let you go. As for making a ton of friends you already have friends, I am one of them. We understand your going thru some shit right now and will b less involved....cool,,,, missing roll no way, we just can't let you do that. And you tell yourself this message from Erussell sometime today while looking in the mirror, "Boomdrum your a fucking bad ass quitter". I quit like fuck with you Boomdrum!
Listen to Erussell brother. It sounds like it's to late to just act like we don't exist. You've already made friends. Friends don't treat friends like that. Take care of your business, but we ask that you keep us around also. Just a little roll post everyday. My guess is your going to get on the computer once a day for something. It usually can be done from your phone also,, depending on what phone you have. Point being,, we don't except that your not going to be around enough to post roll. Get it done and we'll be quit right beside you brother.
Thanks guys. I'm not going anywhere. You have my word.
It's not hostility you hear when people like me SCREAM post every damn day! Being on this side of some funks crave and seeing way too many caves gives me and others here perceptive you don't have. The dominate 'reason' cavers use when answering the 3 dreaded questions is "I stopped posting roll which allowed me to drift away and not feel accountable. This is what we're trying to warn you about.
Parents tell their kids, don't touch that it's hot......
Don't drift - it's death!
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Here's more to my story....
I'm 48 and grew up in a small town in West Texas...You know, where the men were men and the sheep are nervous. Started dipping at 13 with a couple of buddies. We thought we were so cool as we started getting the "ring" on our back pockets. We didn't even think about hiding it from our parents and they didn't seem to think it was big deal either. It was SMOKELESS, so no big deal right? I guess in their minds, at least we weren't smoking.
We ninja dipped in our junior high and high school classrooms, on the school bus traveling to football games and just about everywhere else where we couldn't dip openly. Some of us dipped during football practice.
I've been a semi-professional drummer since the age of 15 and my skills helped me escape the small town at age 24 and make it to the big city. Talk about culture shock...I found myself in social circles were I really didn't feel comfortable being myself. I certainly wasn't going to dip openly in front of these cultured and educated people I found myself involved with. I was ashamed of my background and where I came from.
Fast forward to age 29 when I met my wife. She came from an educated and cultured family, so I certainly couldn't let her know I dipped. I managed to stop before getting married but relapsed about 3 or 4 years into my marriage. This began the next phase of my ninja dipping career..
I remember driving my now 14 yr old son to day care when he was little. I'd open up a can to take a dip and hear him say "daddy what's that smell?" I'd lie and come up with some bullshit answer.
At one point my wife found some empty cans in a disc golf bag. I confessed that I enjoyed dipping when playing disc golf. No big deal, I told her..I lied..I was a liar..And I continued to lie to her up until a few days ago.
I have a day job in an office and I dipped all day during work. I could dip without spitting and could dip just about anywhere without anyone knowing. I had some skills. I had empty cans hidden all over the fucking place, because I was afraid my wife or the janitors at work would see the cans if I put them in the trash can. I'm 43 days quit and I'm still finding empty cans I've stashed in drawers, disc golf bags, drum stick bags.
I'm proud to be 43 days quit from this 35 year addiction. I'm in process of cleaning up my life, which includes dealing with my dysfunctional marriage of 18 years and I'm starting therapy to help address this and other emotional issues I've battled for years. I now know and believe I'm worth it. I've lived the majority of my life hiding and living in shame. No more...
Thanks to everyone who has reached out for support. I quit with you all today.
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Here's more to my story....
I'm 48 and grew up in a small town in West Texas...You know, where the men were men and the sheep are nervous. Started dipping at 13 with a couple of buddies. We thought we were so cool as we started getting the "ring" on our back pockets. We didn't even think about hiding it from our parents and they didn't seem to think it was big deal either. It was SMOKELESS, so no big deal right? I guess in their minds, at least we weren't smoking.
We ninja dipped in our junior high and high school classrooms, on the school bus traveling to football games and just about everywhere else where we couldn't dip openly. Some of us dipped during football practice.
I've been a semi-professional drummer since the age of 15 and my skills helped me escape the small town at age 24 and make it to the big city. Talk about culture shock...I found myself in social circles were I really didn't feel comfortable being myself. I certainly wasn't going to dip openly in front of these cultured and educated people I found myself involved with. I was ashamed of my background and where I came from.
Fast forward to age 29 when I met my wife. She came from an educated and cultured family, so I certainly couldn't let her know I dipped. I managed to stop before getting married but relapsed about 3 or 4 years into my marriage. This began the next phase of my ninja dipping career..
I remember driving my now 14 yr old son to day care when he was little. I'd open up a can to take a dip and hear him say "daddy what's that smell?" I'd lie and come up with some bullshit answer.
At one point my wife found some empty cans in a disc golf bag. I confessed that I enjoyed dipping when playing disc golf. No big deal, I told her..I lied..I was a liar..And I continued to lie to her up until a few days ago.
I have a day job in an office and I dipped all day during work. I could dip without spitting and could dip just about anywhere without anyone knowing. I had some skills. I had empty cans hidden all over the fucking place, because I was afraid my wife or the janitors at work would see the cans if I put them in the trash can. I'm 43 days quit and I'm still finding empty cans I've stashed in drawers, disc golf bags, drum stick bags.
I'm proud to be 43 days quit from this 35 year addiction. I'm in process of cleaning up my life, which includes dealing with my dysfunctional marriage of 18 years and I'm starting therapy to help address this and other emotional issues I've battled for years. I now know and believe I'm worth it. I've lived the majority of my life hiding and living in shame. No more...
Thanks to everyone who has reached out for support. I quit with you all today.
Not to get to analytical on you here bud, but being yourself and being proud of where you came from can be separate from dipping. I am from a very small community in Indiana and started dipping when we moved there. I am very proud of that place and the fact that i come from there. I am not proud that i started dipping but that probably would have happened anyhow to be honest. I spent TWO marriages trying to be someone i wasn't or trying to conform to what they wanted me to be. I am now a very happily married man, 36 days dip free. I am more myself than i have ever been and very proud of that.
Anyhow, i have no idea if that made sense or not, but quit on bud...you got this.
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Here's more to my story....
I'm 48 and grew up in a small town in West Texas...You know, where the men were men and the sheep are nervous. Started dipping at 13 with a couple of buddies. We thought we were so cool as we started getting the "ring" on our back pockets. We didn't even think about hiding it from our parents and they didn't seem to think it was big deal either. It was SMOKELESS, so no big deal right? I guess in their minds, at least we weren't smoking.
We ninja dipped in our junior high and high school classrooms, on the school bus traveling to football games and just about everywhere else where we couldn't dip openly. Some of us dipped during football practice.
I've been a semi-professional drummer since the age of 15 and my skills helped me escape the small town at age 24 and make it to the big city. Talk about culture shock...I found myself in social circles were I really didn't feel comfortable being myself. I certainly wasn't going to dip openly in front of these cultured and educated people I found myself involved with. I was ashamed of my background and where I came from.
Fast forward to age 29 when I met my wife. She came from an educated and cultured family, so I certainly couldn't let her know I dipped. I managed to stop before getting married but relapsed about 3 or 4 years into my marriage. This began the next phase of my ninja dipping career..
I remember driving my now 14 yr old son to day care when he was little. I'd open up a can to take a dip and hear him say "daddy what's that smell?" I'd lie and come up with some bullshit answer.Â
At one point my wife found some empty cans in a disc golf bag. I confessed that I enjoyed dipping when playing disc golf. No big deal, I told her..I lied..I was a liar..And I continued to lie to her up until a few days ago.
I have a day job in an office and I dipped all day during work. I could dip without spitting and could dip just about anywhere without anyone knowing. I had some skills. I had empty cans hidden all over the fucking place, because I was afraid my wife or the janitors at work would see the cans if I put them in the trash can. I'm 43 days quit and I'm still finding empty cans I've stashed in drawers, disc golf bags, drum stick bags.Â
I'm proud to be 43 days quit from this 35 year addiction.  I'm in process of cleaning up my life, which includes dealing with my dysfunctional marriage of 18 years and I'm starting therapy to help address this and other emotional issues I've battled for years. I now know and believe I'm worth it. I've lived the majority of my life hiding and living in shame. No more...
Thanks to everyone who has reached out for support. I quit with you all today.
Not to get to analytical on you here bud, but being yourself and being proud of where you came from can be separate from dipping. I am from a very small community in Indiana and started dipping when we moved there. I am very proud of that place and the fact that i come from there. I am not proud that i started dipping but that probably would have happened anyhow to be honest. I spent TWO marriages trying to be someone i wasn't or trying to conform to what they wanted me to be. I am now a very happily married man, 36 days dip free. I am more myself than i have ever been and very proud of that.
Anyhow, i have no idea if that made sense or not, but quit on bud...you got this.
Thanks jayd41. I've come a long ways considering where I've come from. There's a history of some sexual abuse, drug abuse, and severe depression/anxiety in my background.
I've survived quite a bit and have accepted that all those experiences have made me who I am. I am proud of where I came from now, but I'm still a work in progress and have some cleaning up to do.
I'm getting there...
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you have my support bud...if you can get through some of that awful shit you can get through this...quit on
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This has been a busy, emotionally tough week filled with anxiety and sleepless nights. Definitely feeling the weight as I'm struggling to balance and prioritize competing responsibilities. I've taken the easy and unhealthy road so many times in the past Unfortunately, that road hasn't taken me where I wanted to go, so now I'm changing directions. The right direction..
Things on my mind this week.
I misplaced my Ipad! Fuck.....
My day job is getting busier and more stressful
My music projects are getting busier and more successful
I'm working on strengthening my connection with my 14 yr old son and 11 yr old daughter while simultaneously working on dissolving my marriage
My parents are aging rapidly and I'm coming to grips with how limited my time is with them.
I've promised myself and others that I love dearly I will never use nicotine again and I fully intend to keep that promise. But shit this week sucked...
I'm going into all day recording sessions this weekend to work on the 2nd album for a great singer. This will be the first time in my 33 yr drumming career I've recorded nic-free.
Wish me luck y'all.
I quit with you all today and thanks for listening.
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This has been a busy, emotionally tough week filled with anxiety and sleepless nights. Definitely feeling the weight as I'm struggling to balance and prioritize competing responsibilities. I've taken the easy and unhealthy road so many times in the past Unfortunately, that road hasn't taken me where I wanted to go, so now I'm changing directions. The right direction..
Things on my mind this week.
I misplaced my Ipad! Fuck.....
My day job is getting busier and more stressful
My music projects are getting busier and more successful
I'm working on strengthening my connection with my 14 yr old son and 11 yr old daughter while simultaneously working on dissolving my marriage
My parents are aging rapidly and I'm coming to grips with how limited my time is with them.
I've promised myself and others that I love dearly I will never use nicotine again and I fully intend to keep that promise. But shit this week sucked...
I'm going into all day recording sessions this weekend to work on the 2nd album for a great singer. This will be the first time in my 33 yr drumming career I've recorded nic-free.
Wish me luck y'all.
I quit with you all today and thanks for listening.
I wish you luck with recording session. But as far as dip goes, there is no luck, only quit. And you either are, or you are not. Lets not think about forever right now, or "never again". For today, just think about today. I will meet you back here tomorrow and we will do the same thing. You got this man. Reach out if you need to, my number is free for the asking.
Ryan
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Day 67
I don't have many dippers in my social circle, so avoiding dippers isn't usually much of a problem. I have a buddy at work who's passion is drag racing motorcycles. (I like to call him Evel) He dips at night and on the weekend when he races. He's been after me to hang with him at the races, so I agreed to go yesterday evening, along with another coworker.
A little backstory...Evel's office is a couple of doors down from mine., so he's "followed" my quit in real life from the beginning. He told me early on if I made it 30 days, he'd quit, too. I've told him about KTC and the great support here. 30 days came and he wasn't ready. Then another 30 days came and he still wasn't ready.
So yesterday was my first time in the last 67 days to be in the same vehicle and hanging out with a dipper. It was fascinating. I watched Evel pack a dip within a couple of minutes of finishing a cigarette. Cigarettes and Skoal, all night long. Poor guy. My other buddy had a little pot, but he couldn't share with me because he rolled it with tobacco mixed in! WTF?
I didn't even think about caving. Not an option. I gave my word to not use nicotine yesterday and I meant it. I'm grateful for all of my fellow quitters and for the support and resources here on KTC. I need you guys. Lets do this. I quit with you all today.
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Day 67
I don't have many dippers in my social circle, so avoiding dippers isn't usually much of a problem. I have a buddy at work who's passion is drag racing motorcycles. (I like to call him Evel) He dips at night and on the weekend when he races. He's been after me to hang with him at the races, so I agreed to go yesterday evening, along with another coworker.
A little backstory...Evel's office is a couple of doors down from mine., so he's "followed" my quit in real life from the beginning. He told me early on if I made it 30 days, he'd quit, too. I've told him about KTC and the great support here. 30 days came and he wasn't ready. Then another 30 days came and he still wasn't ready.
So yesterday was my first time in the last 67 days to be in the same vehicle and hanging out with a dipper. It was fascinating. I watched Evel pack a dip within a couple of minutes of finishing a cigarette. Cigarettes and Skoal, all night long. Poor guy. My other buddy had a little pot, but he couldn't share with me because he rolled it with tobacco mixed in! WTF?
I didn't even think about caving. Not an option. I gave my word to not use nicotine yesterday and I meant it. I'm grateful for all of my fellow quitters and for the support and resources here on KTC. I need you guys. Lets do this. I quit with you all today.
Nice quitting boom.. you're starting to see tobacco users through new eyes.. When I see someone now, if there is a thought, it's just sadness for them. knowing what they're missing. Just remember this is about you. stay strong and we got your back all day long.. peace
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Congrats to your bad ass. Bro you just made HOF! How freaking awesome. Stay close, stay diligent, and keep posting roll. Just as I told you before bro I will come looking for you lmao. It's good to have you on the train. I told you last nite in text just wait til the am and it was great to see your text this morning telling how great it felt. I quit with you and I am proud of it! 'worship'
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Congrats to your bad ass. Bro you just made HOF! How freaking awesome. Stay close, stay diligent, and keep posting roll. Just as I told you before bro I will come looking for you lmao. It's good to have you on the train. I told you last nite in text just wait til the am and it was great to see your text this morning telling how great it felt. I quit with you and I am proud of it! 'worship'
Eddie's a li'l hyper eh? Lmao!
Congrats to you brother. 100 is a sweet lookin' number! Y'know what though... 101 is even more badass. Rock on Boom....
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Congrats to your bad ass. Bro you just made HOF! How freaking awesome. Stay close, stay diligent, and keep posting roll. Just as I told you before bro I will come looking for you lmao. It's good to have you on the train. I told you last nite in text just wait til the am and it was great to see your text this morning telling how great it felt. I quit with you and I am proud of it! 'worship'
Eddie's a li'l hyper eh? Lmao!
Congrats to you brother. 100 is a sweet lookin' number! Y'know what though... 101 is even more badass. Rock on Boom....
Thanks guys, I appreciate your support.
Eddie, I'm not going anywhere. I'm gonna keep posting roll.
One day at a time.
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Happy Birthday!!
Here's to at least 49 more! 'Cheers' 'Kiss' 'party' 'party2'
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Happy Birthday!!
Here's to at least 49 more! 'Cheers' 'Kiss' 'party' 'party2'
Happy birthday brother!!!!!! Make sure Daniel makes it a memorable on for sure. Lmao.
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Happy Bday BOOM
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Thanks for the birthday wishes everyone. Yesterday was 274 days quit and my first birthday since 1978 that I celebrated without a dip. Couldn't have made it this far without KTC and I give my word to keep posting roll daily.
Freedom tastes so sweet...almost as sweet as the coconut cream pie LionHeartedGirl made for me yesterday. Best birthday ever. Thanks, sweetheart. :wub: