Just Getting Started

[stump33]

Per- Thanks a million for sharing that tragic story with us my heart goes out to you but sounds like you are really in control this time, and should be a warning to all what can happen and continued posting can be a very effective tool as well as being with others that Quit and seeing what can HAPPEN !!!!

[stump33]

So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.

I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."

Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.

The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.

Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.

And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:

We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.

Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.

Bad.fucking.ass.
Thank You.

[hudsonp]

Thanks for the post Per, i've been fitting that "just one" temptation a lot already this week. I applaud you for sharing that with us

[stump33]

So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.

I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."

Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.

The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.

Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.

And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:

We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.

Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.

Bad.fucking.ass.
Thank You.

Per Thanks for sharing my heart goes out to you but sounds like you are in control, and that memory is planted deep and you will never try that one dip again!!!!!

[ERDVM]

So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.

I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."

Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.

The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.

Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.

And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:

We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.

Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.

Bad.fucking.ass.
Thank You.

[Wt57]

Per thank you for sharing! I know that was damn hard to share! It was pretty damn hard to read also, it makes me realize how vulnerable we addicts are! I don't understand how Anyone can think they are in the clear and free from their addiction. When I was young I stopped for over 3 1/2 yrs ( thats right 1300+ days) and I did exactly what you did. Your story was Déjà vu for me!

[Bruce]

So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.

I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."

Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.

The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.

Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.

And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:

We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.

Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.

I remember you coming back, hit me for some reason, made me scared. But it also made me remember that I'm an addict and I will always be one, and because of that, my guard will be up 24/7 and strong, like Ox. Thanks for sharing Per, you're the man, October and ktc is stronger because you are here.

[luby]

Thank you! That's what I'm talking about. Your advice helped me quit, your cave shook me, and now your advice on how to avoid your mistakes has helped me again.
Again thank you, you have so much do offer our community.

[Arfy]

A great story. One EVERYONE needs to hear. And one YOU better never forget again.

[mfkuss]

Per, thanks for sharing your story! I am sure it wasn't easy, but it is very much appreciated!

Glad that you came back!

Kuss

[Souliman]

I quit with you Per. Let's fucking kill this bro.

[G]

Glad you're back. Thanks for sharing.

[per034]

So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.

I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."

Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.

The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.

Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.

And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:

We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.

Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.

[Scowick65]

tomorrow I hit 100. again. it's different this time around. i don't have the sense of pride. i have more of a realization that it's never over. 100 days. great. big fucking deal. 1,000 days... 10,000 days... 10,000 days is actually just over 27 years. I'll be 66. And I'll still be worried about caving. It never ends. I read a post from MThomas today about a conversation with his wife. It really resonated with me. I was there - except I didn't have a conversation. I had the same mindset he spoke of when he said he need to "leave the hospital" for a while. He was convinced to stick around. I wasn't. When I left, I failed. I didn't reach out to the people who cared about me. My wife. My friends. And most of all my support system here. i wasn't cured. We're never cured. This is a disease that we seek to manage. Not one that we can ever heal.

I appreciate all the support I've been given since I returned. It's come from all over. The Quitheads of August 11 have been tremendous in accepting me back. DChogs and Dante, especially. Others, like Luby, CBird, and Ready - they've been posting support for me from the beginning. I'm really honored by that support. I don't feel like I deserve it, but I'll always remember it. But my history still leaves an open scar. I'll never earn the faith and trust back of other quitters who were my friends and who I betrayed. guys like Souli and Sco... the first time around they were rocks for me. Now I'm invisible to them. And I earned that. I'll never be the quitter I imagined I would be because I failed.

Since I came back I've been, for the most part, inactive. I want to get the HOF behind me because I don't feel like I belong. I'm Pete Rose. I cheated. I'm Shoeless Joe. I disgraced the integrity of this place. I don't deserve the Hall. I understand now how Ed Romero felt when he came back and joined the Quitheads. I never got how he could come back and be silent. But now I get it. We cavers... we need this place; but we don't feel like we really belong again. At least that how I feel. Let this be a cautionary tale for those who are considering a cave. You can return - but you can never come all the way back.

I should be celebrating tomorrow. I don't feel like celebrating though. I'll still be here. But then again, I said that once before. Today I'm here. And today is all that matters.

Hey -

I was going to wait, but I think this needs to be said currently as I read and respond.

First - Keep your head up. You are a Human Being. You are not perfect (Hell neither am I). Yes I have been made to understand that in dealing with the Nic Lady that it is a life or death choice, but you had a slip before, and guess what. As of now you have survived. You came back, and you were a steadfast part of our Oct 12 madmen.

Second - you made it back when you wake up tomorrow. Under any circumtances, 100 days is a good feat and should be celebrated. As you have understood, yes it is not an end but a milestone along the way. If you see the Major League Baseball players they celebrate the division victory but it is not the end of what they are striving for. So treat it as the same, don't discount it.

Am proud to have you in our group, and hope to see you there for the days to come....like getting to that 2nd floor. Be Quit with you.

We're addicts.

We belong.

Learn from your past.
Quit for today.
Fuck tomorrow.

Don't hate yourself because you know what it is to fail. Use your past to inspire and let others know how hard you fall. It's why we're here :accountability. If falling didn't hurt, we'd never get stronger. Some of us have to see firsthand though. It's not ok. It's just a fact.

Set your safeties. Protect your friends. That's all we do here and you're doing it.

I'm proud of you man.

Keep it up, and don't let it happen again.

Bullshit, 100 days is awesome! Doesn't matter what happened last time, this time you are at 100 days. Millions of people haven't started day 1 yet. They are the failures. You swallowed your pride, took your licks and joined the Madmen. And we are glad you are here.

And WE are proud of you and proud to call you brother. Don't give a shit who disowned you last time, keep your eyes down range and on the goal, NEVER GOING BACK. We have had plenty of VETS dis-associate with our group over the past three months, don't put a whole lot of stock in whether or not they approve of what happened. You are here now, and you are quit. That is the only requirement for us in October. Promise us today, keep your word.

Now reach down and straighten your panties, and go share your experience with some new guys. Your story may be the encouragement they need to get through their first day. QLAFM with you, and CONGRATULATIONS BROTHER!!

Read your post last night and started to respond then but I decided to sleep on it, didn't change what I have to say. First off you are welcome for the support, I will do anything to keep you quit, and I will once again reiterate I would not be quit without the advice I got from you early in my quit. Think about that. I am at 448 today, you helped make that happen. I am sorry you are still feeling like you are not all the way back and I don't want to be a dick but that is on you. You have earned your quit every day just like the rest of us and you have chosen not to let yourself be all the way back. You are a damn fine quitter and you have a lot to share, if you do that you will be back and even better than before because you have made the mistake we all fear, you can tell us how to avoid it, you have a ton to offer.
Either way I am glad you are back, congrats on the HoF, you've earned it, you should celebrate.
Damn proud to quit with you all damn day.

Per - I was making my rounds through KTC last pm, looking for vaginas that need a shot of penicillin or some hurt vagina cream, when I came across your post. At first glance I thought you might be developing some HOF vaginitis, but then I saw all the bad asses that have your back. JAG's diagnosis is correct - you don't need a tube of ointment - you need to pull those lacy panties down some. Better yet, tear em off and let that stanky cooch get some fresh air.

Boldly wear the "R" on your shirt. There are retreads around that now, no one knows they were retreads. They quietly came back and now watch from the sidelines. Weighed down by some imaginary guilt stone. That's fine. They are solid quitters. There are others, who put their "R" shirt on everyday and make sure everyone knows it. They have shared their story so much, that everyone knows what happened. They do it to guide others, and, to never forget. There is one supporting you in this thread. Not gonna say his name but he has a metal jaw and enjoys hiney sechs with HeMan. We all can recite his story almost verbatim.

Per - I'm not going to cup your scrotum - I only help vaginas - but it is evident to everyone that you fall into the latter category of retreads. But thats your choice. How about starting with some support in Jan 13? Those fogturds need some direction.

Vadge

Thanks for bringing the quit again. If she whispers in you ear, stomp on her face. ;)

[ERDVM]

tomorrow I hit 100. again. it's different this time around. i don't have the sense of pride. i have more of a realization that it's never over. 100 days. great. big fucking deal. 1,000 days... 10,000 days... 10,000 days is actually just over 27 years. I'll be 66. And I'll still be worried about caving. It never ends. I read a post from MThomas today about a conversation with his wife. It really resonated with me. I was there - except I didn't have a conversation. I had the same mindset he spoke of when he said he need to "leave the hospital" for a while. He was convinced to stick around. I wasn't. When I left, I failed. I didn't reach out to the people who cared about me. My wife. My friends. And most of all my support system here. i wasn't cured. We're never cured. This is a disease that we seek to manage. Not one that we can ever heal.

I appreciate all the support I've been given since I returned. It's come from all over. The Quitheads of August 11 have been tremendous in accepting me back. DChogs and Dante, especially. Others, like Luby, CBird, and Ready - they've been posting support for me from the beginning. I'm really honored by that support. I don't feel like I deserve it, but I'll always remember it. But my history still leaves an open scar. I'll never earn the faith and trust back of other quitters who were my friends and who I betrayed. guys like Souli and Sco... the first time around they were rocks for me. Now I'm invisible to them. And I earned that. I'll never be the quitter I imagined I would be because I failed.

Since I came back I've been, for the most part, inactive. I want to get the HOF behind me because I don't feel like I belong. I'm Pete Rose. I cheated. I'm Shoeless Joe. I disgraced the integrity of this place. I don't deserve the Hall. I understand now how Ed Romero felt when he came back and joined the Quitheads. I never got how he could come back and be silent. But now I get it. We cavers... we need this place; but we don't feel like we really belong again. At least that how I feel. Let this be a cautionary tale for those who are considering a cave. You can return - but you can never come all the way back.

I should be celebrating tomorrow. I don't feel like celebrating though. I'll still be here. But then again, I said that once before. Today I'm here. And today is all that matters.

Hey -

I was going to wait, but I think this needs to be said currently as I read and respond.

First - Keep your head up. You are a Human Being. You are not perfect (Hell neither am I). Yes I have been made to understand that in dealing with the Nic Lady that it is a life or death choice, but you had a slip before, and guess what. As of now you have survived. You came back, and you were a steadfast part of our Oct 12 madmen.

Second - you made it back when you wake up tomorrow. Under any circumtances, 100 days is a good feat and should be celebrated. As you have understood, yes it is not an end but a milestone along the way. If you see the Major League Baseball players they celebrate the division victory but it is not the end of what they are striving for. So treat it as the same, don't discount it.

Am proud to have you in our group, and hope to see you there for the days to come....like getting to that 2nd floor. Be Quit with you.

We're addicts.

We belong.

Learn from your past.
Quit for today.
Fuck tomorrow.

Don't hate yourself because you know what it is to fail. Use your past to inspire and let others know how hard you fall. It's why we're here :accountability. If falling didn't hurt, we'd never get stronger. Some of us have to see firsthand though. It's not ok. It's just a fact.

Set your safeties. Protect your friends. That's all we do here and you're doing it.

I'm proud of you man.

Keep it up, and don't let it happen again.

Bullshit, 100 days is awesome! Doesn't matter what happened last time, this time you are at 100 days. Millions of people haven't started day 1 yet. They are the failures. You swallowed your pride, took your licks and joined the Madmen. And we are glad you are here.

And WE are proud of you and proud to call you brother. Don't give a shit who disowned you last time, keep your eyes down range and on the goal, NEVER GOING BACK. We have had plenty of VETS dis-associate with our group over the past three months, don't put a whole lot of stock in whether or not they approve of what happened. You are here now, and you are quit. That is the only requirement for us in October. Promise us today, keep your word.

Now reach down and straighten your panties, and go share your experience with some new guys. Your story may be the encouragement they need to get through their first day. QLAFM with you, and CONGRATULATIONS BROTHER!!

Read your post last night and started to respond then but I decided to sleep on it, didn't change what I have to say. First off you are welcome for the support, I will do anything to keep you quit, and I will once again reiterate I would not be quit without the advice I got from you early in my quit. Think about that. I am at 448 today, you helped make that happen. I am sorry you are still feeling like you are not all the way back and I don't want to be a dick but that is on you. You have earned your quit every day just like the rest of us and you have chosen not to let yourself be all the way back. You are a damn fine quitter and you have a lot to share, if you do that you will be back and even better than before because you have made the mistake we all fear, you can tell us how to avoid it, you have a ton to offer.
Either way I am glad you are back, congrats on the HoF, you've earned it, you should celebrate.
Damn proud to quit with you all damn day.

Per - I was making my rounds through KTC last pm, looking for vaginas that need a shot of penicillin or some hurt vagina cream, when I came across your post. At first glance I thought you might be developing some HOF vaginitis, but then I saw all the bad asses that have your back. JAG's diagnosis is correct - you don't need a tube of ointment - you need to pull those lacy panties down some. Better yet, tear em off and let that stanky cooch get some fresh air.

Boldly wear the "R" on your shirt. There are retreads around that now, no one knows they were retreads. They quietly came back and now watch from the sidelines. Weighed down by some imaginary guilt stone. That's fine. They are solid quitters. There are others, who put their "R" shirt on everyday and make sure everyone knows it. They have shared their story so much, that everyone knows what happened. They do it to guide others, and, to never forget. There is one supporting you in this thread. Not gonna say his name but he has a metal jaw and enjoys hiney sechs with HeMan. We all can recite his story almost verbatim.

Per - I'm not going to cup your scrotum - I only help vaginas - but it is evident to everyone that you fall into the latter category of retreads. But thats your choice. How about starting with some support in Jan 13? Those fogturds need some direction.

Vadge