I haven't told my wife yet about quitting. I don't want to see the look of disappointment in her face if, God forbid, I fail again. I don't dip in front of her, but she knows. (Like a gay in the military, she doesn't ask and I sure as shit don't tell).
dude, that was 100% me. I did not till my wife of my quit till like day 25. I then told her if she ever wanted to know if I was dipping to check roll call. I gave her my log in info. I said if my name is on roll call I aint dipping, if you don't see my name, you don't have to ask.
see... I went the other way.
the day i signed up, i printed off the spousal support section, sat Mama down and told her why i thought this time would be different. She read all the stuff, smiled and said "Thanks for Trying". At the time I thought it was great of her to support me... but then I stopped and thought. "I ain't fuckin tryin here. I'm DOING."
She's been nothing but supportive and even stops to pick up some fake shit if I ask. In 12 years, she never once bought me a can of the real shit...
You don't gotta tell her right away, but you should tell her so she understands when you're a grumpy bear.
Just my two cents. Welcome to the site. Stop by April for some entertainment.
Let us know if you need anything.
Here is my take I hid it from my wife for a few days. Then I got sick the fog came in I was not myself and she asked why. Then I came clean with her. You are passing up an oppertunity for some support at home as well. Tell her then come here and post up. Like Greg said in an earlier post the mind set is what you have to have there is no If or may it is WHEN and I CAN. Caving is not an option find something else to do you can't have a dip anymore so chew seed gum whatever just no nicotine. I printed out the following link gave a copy to my wife so she knew what to expect and told her evry morning what day I was on.
You have a great start just fine tune it make a plan ie I have a bad crave I will call Greg to ask if I can have a dip or I will eat seed until the crave goes away.
That is why your quit group is so important they are going through the same things you are now. So get in there get some names and phone numbers meet some new friend. But be fair with your wife let her know.
http://www.killthecan.org/yourquit/what.asp
....if, God forbid, I fail again....My advice, tell her, then DON"T FAIL! It 100% up to you. You want to quit. She wants you to quit. SO QUIT! Yes, its difficult, but success is entirely in your court.
I can't claim to know the relationship you have with your wife, but I know from my experience, and the experiences I've read from many other quitters, the support you get at home is just as important as the support you get here. My wife's support was fantastic, and she continues to play a vital role in keeping me quit.
By the way, if, God forbid, you fail again, you;re already going to disappoint me and 100's of other quitters on this site. You have given us your word, so sorry, failure is not an option.
Welcome.
My 2 cents on the fake chew - If it works, use it. Your use of it will decline naturally over time without much effort from you. Eventually you'll have a day where you remember that you haven't used any in weeks.
