Welcome NWPilot.
I concur with wildirish. Take hope out of the picture. You have 100% control whether nicotine goes in your body again or not. There is no good reason to ingest nicotine, period. You are an addict, so you will have withdrawals if you don't have it. Not only that, nicotine addiction wires the brain so that you can't feel normal without the poisonous crap. Now your brain has to go through a long process of re-wiring itself before you start to feel normal again. Ingesting any amount of nicotine just resets the whole process. That's why we can't have just one. Embrace the suck--through it you are building a new normal. It's going to suck up until day 10 -14 and then the fog starts to clear and the cravings hit less and less often.
I encourage you to make it real, not hoping, by holding yourself accountable. Start posting daily roll call with a quit group whereby you make a promise to yourself and us that you will not use nicotine for the rest of the day. We quit one day at time...or down to the hour (or minute) if need be. By posting your daily promise with a quit group, you'll also have the support of your group mates who are going through similar challenges and symptoms, plus there are many thousands of years of quit experience from vets. It sure beats quitting alone, which most of us tried and tried, and failed and failed. Do it the KTC way and you will not fail.
The November '19 HOF Group (named for the month when you will reach 100 days in a row of being quit) is linked right here:
https://ktcforum.org/index.php?topic=15766.0
