Author Topic: CTF - new to the group today  (Read 12046 times)

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Offline EXBEARHAG

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #15 on: June 16, 2020, 09:12:44 PM »
Week 2 in the books

This week found new challenges but nothing I couldn't deal with. For some stupid reason I was thinking about chew more than I wanted to but my coping mechanisms got me through it. I have to say for me my biggest tool in my tool belt is just willpower. Knowing that this isn't anything I want to do any longer helps. I loved chewing but to be honest as the days go by that longing or love seems to be less and less.

Oral hygiene: I kicked it up a notch using my water pick and electric Oral B toothbrush more often than I normally do. My mouth seems to be healing and I am trying to do everything to make that happen.

What am I doing when I crave:
For me I don't want to use any of the fake stuff. I want to completely walk away from anything chew like. I chew eclipse spearmint gum and some beef jerky. I am a huge fan of sunflower seeds but I'm trying to steer away from that as well to allow my mouth to heal. I do see some SPITZ Honey BBQ seeds in my future. They have less salt in them and seem to be easier in my mouth.

Weight gain:
I have gained a bit. I plan on countering that in making better food choices and working out a bit more. there is a saying though that you can't outrun your fork so probably what makes most sense is eating more salads.

A couple of beers no crave:
I have had a bit of alcohol this week, just a couple of beers one night and I did well.. I didn't really crave while drinking. I hadn't gone while high to test my will and I don't plan to for some time. I have always been a huge water drinker and that hasn't changed.

Thank you:
To everyone who has reached out to me. I sincerely thank you.

Until next week stay strong my friends. If you need anyone to I am just a PM/text/phone call away.

Cheers,

CTF

Keep blogging it out CTF.  In some ways, I think you are, at 2 weeks, ahead of me at 337 days.  I too thought that I "loved" dip.  I'm certainly still guilty of romanticizing the addiction from time to time.  Your focus and determination at 2 weeks is good for me to be exposed to.  Keep kicking ass brother.  Hold that line.

~HAG

Offline Zeus

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #14 on: June 13, 2020, 04:22:45 PM »
Nice write up and great work, CTF. Keep doing what you're doing, and then some.

I would only caution you to change up your word usage. You didn't "love" to dip. You may have thought you did, but you dipped because dip contains nicotine, and you used nicotine to avoid withdrawal symptoms. You probably did activities you enjoyed doing, and dipped while doing them, but nicotine chemically hijinked those good feelings and memories.

I'm a big fan of beef jerky. On could say I love it, but I've never needed to be gnawing on it all day part of the night. I've never had to sneak away from my family to get a fix. I've never kept gnawing on it for years after my loved-ones, employers, doctors, etc., implored me to stop gnawing it.

Don't let allow yourself to romanticize the dip. Its main mission was to enslave you, take your money, and one day kill you. What you're going through is withdrawal symptoms--not love or longing. Don't fool yourself.
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Offline CTF

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #13 on: June 13, 2020, 01:12:29 PM »
Week 2 in the books

This week found new challenges but nothing I couldn't deal with. For some stupid reason I was thinking about chew more than I wanted to but my coping mechanisms got me through it. I have to say for me my biggest tool in my tool belt is just willpower. Knowing that this isn't anything I want to do any longer helps. I loved chewing but to be honest as the days go by that longing or love seems to be less and less.

Oral hygiene: I kicked it up a notch using my water pick and electric Oral B toothbrush more often than I normally do. My mouth seems to be healing and I am trying to do everything to make that happen.

What am I doing when I crave:
For me I don't want to use any of the fake stuff. I want to completely walk away from anything chew like. I chew eclipse spearmint gum and some beef jerky. I am a huge fan of sunflower seeds but I'm trying to steer away from that as well to allow my mouth to heal. I do see some SPITZ Honey BBQ seeds in my future. They have less salt in them and seem to be easier in my mouth.

Weight gain:
I have gained a bit. I plan on countering that in making better food choices and working out a bit more. there is a saying though that you can't outrun your fork so probably what makes most sense is eating more salads.

A couple of beers no crave:
I have had a bit of alcohol this week, just a couple of beers one night and I did well.. I didn't really crave while drinking. I hadn't gone while high to test my will and I don't plan to for some time. I have always been a huge water drinker and that hasn't changed.

Thank you:
To everyone who has reached out to me. I sincerely thank you.

Until next week stay strong my friends. If you need anyone to I am just a PM/text/phone call away.

Cheers,

CTF

Offline EXBEARHAG

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #12 on: June 10, 2020, 10:30:17 PM »
@CTF I love your attitude and your drive.  Looks to me like you have the right mindset.  Make sure you get some phone numbers for when the going gets rougher.  My digits are a pm away.  Hold the line my friend.


The last 48 hours haven't been easy. I don't know why. I know the chemicals that chewing brings are outside of my body by now but for some reason my mind is playing tricks on me. It's a game to me now. I think if it was easy I would overlook this challenge but because it has me by the balls it's now personal. To be honest it's always been personal but these last few days of struggle is open my eyes a little wider.

I'm very much looking forward to Friday. Friday will be the day that with honest eyes I look at my wife and tell her I've been quit for 2 weeks and I'm serious I am done. In our 25 years of marriage we have had a number of issues back and forth but everyone could be resolved except for my chewing habit. It has been the one thing that has driven a steak in a relationship. On Friday I get to tell my wife of where I'm at and how I'm walking away from this crap. I'm also going to tell her about this group to offer just how serious I am about being done.

Over the last few days there have been a number of you guys reaching out to me and I were very much appreciate it. That is very easy to say but I truly mean it. Thank you all so very much in advance.

CTF
@CTF keep focusing ODAAT and let the days add up. The light at the end of the tunnel will get brighter and brighter but it does take time. You can’t stuff crap in your lip for years and it not take time for your boy to except the new you. WUPP and everything will take care of itself. Proud to quit with you.

Love how you are getting involved around here as well CTF...monitoring the Intros and offering help and your contact info.  Helping others will reinforce your quit like nothing else you can do.  Keep it up my friend. 

Holding the line...

Offline Keith0617

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #11 on: June 09, 2020, 01:04:15 PM »
@CTF I love your attitude and your drive.  Looks to me like you have the right mindset.  Make sure you get some phone numbers for when the going gets rougher.  My digits are a pm away.  Hold the line my friend.


The last 48 hours haven't been easy. I don't know why. I know the chemicals that chewing brings are outside of my body by now but for some reason my mind is playing tricks on me. It's a game to me now. I think if it was easy I would overlook this challenge but because it has me by the balls it's now personal. To be honest it's always been personal but these last few days of struggle is open my eyes a little wider.

I'm very much looking forward to Friday. Friday will be the day that with honest eyes I look at my wife and tell her I've been quit for 2 weeks and I'm serious I am done. In our 25 years of marriage we have had a number of issues back and forth but everyone could be resolved except for my chewing habit. It has been the one thing that has driven a steak in a relationship. On Friday I get to tell my wife of where I'm at and how I'm walking away from this crap. I'm also going to tell her about this group to offer just how serious I am about being done.

Over the last few days there have been a number of you guys reaching out to me and I were very much appreciate it. That is very easy to say but I truly mean it. Thank you all so very much in advance.

CTF
@CTF keep focusing ODAAT and let the days add up. The light at the end of the tunnel will get brighter and brighter but it does take time. You can’t stuff crap in your lip for years and it not take time for your boy to except the new you. WUPP and everything will take care of itself. Proud to quit with you.
Jan19

Offline CTF

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #10 on: June 09, 2020, 10:30:35 AM »
@CTF I love your attitude and your drive.  Looks to me like you have the right mindset.  Make sure you get some phone numbers for when the going gets rougher.  My digits are a pm away.  Hold the line my friend.


The last 48 hours haven't been easy. I don't know why. I know the chemicals that chewing brings are outside of my body by now but for some reason my mind is playing tricks on me. It's a game to me now. I think if it was easy I would overlook this challenge but because it has me by the balls it's now personal. To be honest it's always been personal but these last few days of struggle is open my eyes a little wider.

I'm very much looking forward to Friday. Friday will be the day that with honest eyes I look at my wife and tell her I've been quit for 2 weeks and I'm serious I am done. In our 25 years of marriage we have had a number of issues back and forth but everyone could be resolved except for my chewing habit. It has been the one thing that has driven a steak in a relationship. On Friday I get to tell my wife of where I'm at and how I'm walking away from this crap. I'm also going to tell her about this group to offer just how serious I am about being done.

Over the last few days there have been a number of you guys reaching out to me and I were very much appreciate it. That is very easy to say but I truly mean it. Thank you all so very much in advance.

CTF

Offline EXBEARHAG

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #9 on: June 08, 2020, 10:19:30 PM »
@CTF I love your attitude and your drive.  Looks to me like you have the right mindset.  Make sure you get some phone numbers for when the going gets rougher.  My digits are a pm away.  Hold the line my friend.

Offline Athan

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #8 on: June 08, 2020, 03:14:51 PM »
6/7/20 Sunday morning - I used to have a small quiet pinch on Sundays with my coffee when the house is quiet early in the morning. In the past the wife would wake up and there was always that look to see if I had something. The guilt feeling would take over. I can honestly say not today. I was happy as a clam sipping my coffee knowing nothing was there. No way to express or feel guilt. This is Day 9 and it feels like what I imagine 99 will. Do I think about it? Sure I do. I continue to have the resolve to say No. For me, for my wife for my daughter. No a thousand times No.
That used to be my Sunday morning routine as well. All alone with my coffee and a lipper. Never again for any reason. Good that you're cognizant of it, the small successes, the awareness of life without it. Little victories like this will crop up from time to time. Acknowledge and savor them as you have this one. Blog it out here and document them as they come; they are bricks in your wall of quit. They edify others (even vets like me) and will edify you as well as you look back on how far you've come.
"I hope you find a thousand reasons to quit today" Rawls
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"There are two dogs in the fight, which one are you feeding?" SuperDave9000
"In the Navy we had morning muster. You never miss muster. You better be dead if you miss. If you are dying, you should have started crawling earlier, no excuse." Olcpo

The Science of Addiction
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My Intro and HOF Speech
Quitters I've met: Cbird, UncleRico, Gregor, KDip, Broccoli-saurus, Croakenhagen, BriagG, Koba, Kodiakdeath, Arrakisdq, McDave, Worktowin, SkolVikings, JGromo, GS9502, PaDutchman, Stillbrewing, A-Aron...
wildirish317
outdoortexan cancer

Offline Keith0617

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #7 on: June 07, 2020, 06:07:05 PM »
6/7/20 Sunday morning - I used to have a small quiet pinch on Sundays with my coffee when the house is quiet early in the morning. In the past the wife would wake up and there was always that look to see if I had something. The guilt feeling would take over. I can honestly say not today. I was happy as a clam sipping my coffee knowing nothing was there. No way to express or feel guilt. This is Day 9 and it feels like what I imagine 99 will. Do I think about it? Sure I do. I continue to have the resolve to say No. For me, for my wife for my daughter. No a thousand times No.
I @CTF    glad to see you found your group and posted roll. We wake up, piss, and post our promise first thing to stay nicotine free for the day. Only worry about today as we quit ODAAT - one day at a time. We will deal with tomorrow when it comes. Make connections with other quitters. Exchanging digits is recommended but only through personal messages and not on the forum or here in the Intro area. You can do this and we are here to help. Shoot me a message if I can help at all.
Jan19

Offline CTF

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #6 on: June 07, 2020, 01:25:31 PM »
6/7/20 Sunday morning - I used to have a small quiet pinch on Sundays with my coffee when the house is quiet early in the morning. In the past the wife would wake up and there was always that look to see if I had something. The guilt feeling would take over. I can honestly say not today. I was happy as a clam sipping my coffee knowing nothing was there. No way to express or feel guilt. This is Day 9 and it feels like what I imagine 99 will. Do I think about it? Sure I do. I continue to have the resolve to say No. For me, for my wife for my daughter. No a thousand times No.

Offline Athan

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #5 on: June 05, 2020, 12:24:26 PM »
....Any of you, the people who's shoes I am walking in, my idols my rock stars have any advice/knowledge/whatever support concerning on how you finally said I am done and how you handled it I will take it...
Educate yourself. I've some links in my tagline. Knowledge is power. Ignorance is terribly expensive. Loving the "Director of No"!
"I hope you find a thousand reasons to quit today" Rawls
"I can't quit for you. I will quit with you" Ready
"There are two dogs in the fight, which one are you feeding?" SuperDave9000
"In the Navy we had morning muster. You never miss muster. You better be dead if you miss. If you are dying, you should have started crawling earlier, no excuse." Olcpo

The Science of Addiction
The Law of Addiction
The Road Called Recovery
My Intro and HOF Speech
Quitters I've met: Cbird, UncleRico, Gregor, KDip, Broccoli-saurus, Croakenhagen, BriagG, Koba, Kodiakdeath, Arrakisdq, McDave, Worktowin, SkolVikings, JGromo, GS9502, PaDutchman, Stillbrewing, A-Aron...
wildirish317
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Offline CTF

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #4 on: June 05, 2020, 12:00:42 PM »
168 hours ago

168 hours ago or one week from right now I decided I am done with this crap. I thought to myself how will this time be different? I mean I have tried to stop this insanity before only to fail but somehow/someway this feels different. I just have it in my head that I am walking away. The only way I can explain it is through my military training. One thing you learn when you are in a training that is stretching you to the limits (think no sleep, body is beyond exhaustion, brain is in a fog) is to lean forward and take one more step, then another and another. Don't let those bastards (Instructors) beat you. That how I am handling this obviously with different role players. It's me vs the devil in nicotine. The reason why I got to 168 hours is I have my head straight and I am telling my body one step forward, then one more and one more. The difference is instead of going to somewhere I am going away from a place where I have been. That's the only way I can explain it.

For me what has helped:
Chewing gum. You need that oral fix. Your brain is trained to be a custom to having something there. Down side is my jaw is completely sure from chewing gum, something I didn't anticipate. Solution hard candy

Physical Activity. When the devil taps me on the shouldee and suggests I to him rather than away I go and take a short walk and do some deep breathing to get past it. Working out/running/riding my bike whatever it takes to stop thinking

I am the Director Of No as a last resort. Enjoying beers or Bourbons with buddies, out on the golf course or under my car, places comfortable for me to chew, I become the Director of No. In all seriousness I have a 5 second meeting with myself and say no, which is usually followed by gum and a hour or two later followed by a sore jaw but that vicious cycle works for me.

168 hours ago I said I am done. Gave the big middle finger to chew. I am walking away every minute, every hour and now ever week from this shit.

Any of you, the people who's shoes I am walking in, my idols my rock stars have any advice/knowledge/whatever support concerning on how you finally said I am done and how you handled it I will take it. To me it's just that this time I have a plan, action, accountability to myself and the will power to say I am walking away


Offline AwakenedOne

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #3 on: June 05, 2020, 09:36:11 AM »
@CTF  Welcome my friend! You made a great decision. This site will keep you quit as long as you buy in. Accountability is what this site is rooted in, it is what has kept me quit. Other attempts would always fail, but the network of fellow quitters that I've built through this site has been the key factor in keeping me from stuffing my face with cancer dirt. I'll DM you my digits and text you my daily promise not to consume nicotine in any form, I hope you do the same in return to help keep me accountable as well. Hoping to hear from you!

-Chaston
 INTRODUCTION | H.O.F SPEECH | H.O.F WRITE-UP
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Offline Athan

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Re: CTF - new to the group today
« Reply #2 on: June 04, 2020, 05:57:16 PM »
Welcome aboard. I'm glad you're here.
"I hope you find a thousand reasons to quit today" Rawls
"I can't quit for you. I will quit with you" Ready
"There are two dogs in the fight, which one are you feeding?" SuperDave9000
"In the Navy we had morning muster. You never miss muster. You better be dead if you miss. If you are dying, you should have started crawling earlier, no excuse." Olcpo

The Science of Addiction
The Law of Addiction
The Road Called Recovery
My Intro and HOF Speech
Quitters I've met: Cbird, UncleRico, Gregor, KDip, Broccoli-saurus, Croakenhagen, BriagG, Koba, Kodiakdeath, Arrakisdq, McDave, Worktowin, SkolVikings, JGromo, GS9502, PaDutchman, Stillbrewing, A-Aron...
wildirish317
outdoortexan cancer

Offline CTF

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CTF - new to the group today
« on: June 04, 2020, 03:59:26 PM »
Hello everyone. I signed up for the group today after quitting 6 days ago. I have a very similar story to all those who posted previously. Bottom line: I am done with this crap. It hasn't been easy but I finally have the willpower to say no more. I have been tested a few days ago as hopped in the car to buy a can only to turn right around after asking myself what are you doing? I know I can beat this!

Cheers and glad to be here