I have learned a lot in these past 100 days. I've seen what happens when you lie to those you love most. I've seen just how powerful a hold nicotine had on my life. When I admitted I had a problem I felt a huge sense of relief, but I had lied to those I love and it created problems that have only recently been fixed. I had much support from those of love and from my brothers and sisters in the quit in December.
Two major points stick with me through this quit:
1) Quitting is a very real and possible thing. For so long I never thought I was strong enough to quit. I had tried and tried again and failed every time. When I had quit for a little bit and fell back into the habit, I thought there was no way out. This substance had its grips in me and was not wanting to let go. The guilt of all the lying finally caught up to me and it was heavy on my heart to admit my faults and quit. Admitting you are broken and need help was a huge relief for me. This massive weight was lifted off my shoulders and I felt truly motivated to quit for the first time in my life. I came at with an aproach of not "when I cave", but, "I will not cave."
2) It taught me that the pit falls and struggles in life will make you stronger. Many in December know I take my faith very seriously. I approached the quit with two perspectives. I was quitting for myself and my faith. Since I had quit my faith has grown more than I can believe. I have appraoched certain situations with prayer and steadfast trust in God. This struggle in the quit has made me stronger.
I will continue to be quit until the day I die. I'm the first one in my family who got addicted to this substance, to break the mold and finally quit. I hope and pray I'm an example for my cousins and friends to stop, and I will be there for them when it is their time to quit.
-jal0315
