Community > General Discussion
Bachelor Party and Cigars
--Ajax--:
I'm going to repost here a response I just put in my quit month (Sept) thread...
This is true, at that moment i didn't want help, I didn't want a text, I didn't want a call, I didn't want someone to be there to tell me No, I wanted that one fucking hit of nicotine. All rules were out the window for that point in time. 60 seconds later I was staying away from the person who I saw that I knew would give one. 60 seconds after that we were piling in a Lyft and out of there. At that point I knew first thing when we got back to the house that I wanted to make my post with my KTC brethren. I know it was reckless and disrespectful to my health, integrity, and promise to you all. I dodged a bullet and I will learn through my error, this WILL make me stronger. And I hope my sharing this will make all of you determined to be better than I and stronger to not get in the predicament I put myself into.
Peter Gibbons:
--- Quote from: DjPorkchop on July 13, 2019, 04:01:55 PM ---I once saw a guy on here ask, "If a buddy at a party offered to put his cock in your mouth would you do it? I'm guessing probably not. So why would you put a cigar or dip or a cigarette in your mouth?".
Now that's food for thought right? I'm glad to hear OP has a vaca buddy / contacts. Early on and parties can suck for sure.
Stay quit my friends!
--- End quote ---
Too bad he didn't use that buddy when he was asking random people to bum a cigarette last night.
DjPorkchop:
I once saw a guy on here ask, "If a buddy at a party offered to put his cock in your mouth would you do it? I'm guessing probably not. So why would you put a cigar or dip or a cigarette in your mouth?".
Now that's food for thought right? I'm glad to hear OP has a vaca buddy / contacts. Early on and parties can suck for sure.
Stay quit my friends!
--Ajax--:
--- Quote from: Peter Gibbons on July 11, 2019, 08:54:18 PM ---
--- Quote from: Broccoli-saurus on July 11, 2019, 06:19:28 PM ---
--- Quote from: DonkeyMN on July 11, 2019, 04:05:28 PM ---
--- Quote from: chris2alaska on July 11, 2019, 10:43:07 AM ---
--- Quote from: --Ajax-- on July 11, 2019, 10:08:38 AM ---Hey everyone, need a little support here. Been quit for 25 days.
So I'm going to a bachelor party this weekend out on Martha's Vineyard, so stoked for this trip with good friends! Thing is, in the past (pre quit me) was prone to bum a cigarette while out at a bar. Also, there will certainly be cigars to celebrate. Now I realize we are not talking hookers and blow here, though now that I think of it both of those do not contain nicotine,,, I digress. So my point is I'm sharing this now to hold myself accountable to keep away from nic on this trip.
Any of the vets reading this have an experience to share regarding the celebratory cigar? I know to keep my drinking to a minimum and to decline the cigar, just hoping to hear from someone who may have a good story about being in a similar position.
Cheers
--- End quote ---
Ajax,
Nicotine is nicotine in whatever form it comes in, cigars, cigarettes, dip, vapes, whatever. Any of those ingested by you, is a cave.
I would suggest that,
A: WUPP every morning and take nicotine off the table. At that point you have made your promise and if you are a man of your word, you will keep that promise.
B: Get as many phone numbers from other quitters in here, vets included, before you go to your party and make sure you use those numbers when the craving hits you over the weekend. Call one us man, we can help you get back down off that cliff but only if you reach out to us. We unfortunately can not read your mind to know that you are in trouble so its up to you make the call.
C: Tell your buddies that you have quit nicotine in ANY form and you would appreciate their support by not offering any to you and also for them to KICK YOU ASS if you even think of "bumming" one from someone.
D: I would recommend that you don't drink at all but I'm sure that recommendation will go out the window. If you do drink, keep it in moderation so you can keep your senses about you.
PM me for my digits and I would be happy to support you.
Chris
--- End quote ---
Chris is spot on, but for sure you NEED to do letter C. You might get a little ribbing, but look em in the eye and say "I'm fucking serious. I cannot have any form of nicotine or I will go back to being a slave." There is no gray area. I went on a fishing trip about 90 days in and had the same speech for the 7 guys I was with. One of em tried to offer me a swisher sweet and I about lost my shit on him.
Point is, you are doing this for yourself as much as them. You need to hear yourself out loud proclaim your independence, and strengthen your accountability with a new group of people.
You can do this. Have fun at the party bro, easy on the hookers and blow.
--- End quote ---
Hookers actually usually have quite a bit of nicotine in them, so I've heard. Anyway. I caved to a cigar once and flipped my whole group and this site off before walking out the door. Two weeks later, I was back to dipping a can a day again. Once you're quit, you're quit. If you open that door a little crack, the nic bitch will push the door wide open, and you'll be wondering where it all went wrong. Tell the guys you're quit, limit alcohol. If some asshole decides it'll be funny to put a cigar in your hand or in your mouth or pocket or butt...however it works in your friend group, take it out, drop it on the floor, and crush it with your boot. That should get the message across.
--- End quote ---
This exact conversation happened a couple weeks ago. Here is a link to that discussion: https://ktcforum.org/index.php?topic=14300.msg7296633#msg7296633
--- End quote ---
Thanks for all of the guidance and support! I checked out that other discussion going on and turns out the OP is also in my quit group and on vaca at the beach this weekend. So we have a buddy system going. Cheers to no nic for the weekend party 'party2'
Peter Gibbons:
--- Quote from: Broccoli-saurus on July 11, 2019, 06:19:28 PM ---
--- Quote from: DonkeyMN on July 11, 2019, 04:05:28 PM ---
--- Quote from: chris2alaska on July 11, 2019, 10:43:07 AM ---
--- Quote from: --Ajax-- on July 11, 2019, 10:08:38 AM ---Hey everyone, need a little support here. Been quit for 25 days.
So I'm going to a bachelor party this weekend out on Martha's Vineyard, so stoked for this trip with good friends! Thing is, in the past (pre quit me) was prone to bum a cigarette while out at a bar. Also, there will certainly be cigars to celebrate. Now I realize we are not talking hookers and blow here, though now that I think of it both of those do not contain nicotine,,, I digress. So my point is I'm sharing this now to hold myself accountable to keep away from nic on this trip.
Any of the vets reading this have an experience to share regarding the celebratory cigar? I know to keep my drinking to a minimum and to decline the cigar, just hoping to hear from someone who may have a good story about being in a similar position.
Cheers
--- End quote ---
Ajax,
Nicotine is nicotine in whatever form it comes in, cigars, cigarettes, dip, vapes, whatever. Any of those ingested by you, is a cave.
I would suggest that,
A: WUPP every morning and take nicotine off the table. At that point you have made your promise and if you are a man of your word, you will keep that promise.
B: Get as many phone numbers from other quitters in here, vets included, before you go to your party and make sure you use those numbers when the craving hits you over the weekend. Call one us man, we can help you get back down off that cliff but only if you reach out to us. We unfortunately can not read your mind to know that you are in trouble so its up to you make the call.
C: Tell your buddies that you have quit nicotine in ANY form and you would appreciate their support by not offering any to you and also for them to KICK YOU ASS if you even think of "bumming" one from someone.
D: I would recommend that you don't drink at all but I'm sure that recommendation will go out the window. If you do drink, keep it in moderation so you can keep your senses about you.
PM me for my digits and I would be happy to support you.
Chris
--- End quote ---
Chris is spot on, but for sure you NEED to do letter C. You might get a little ribbing, but look em in the eye and say "I'm fucking serious. I cannot have any form of nicotine or I will go back to being a slave." There is no gray area. I went on a fishing trip about 90 days in and had the same speech for the 7 guys I was with. One of em tried to offer me a swisher sweet and I about lost my shit on him.
Point is, you are doing this for yourself as much as them. You need to hear yourself out loud proclaim your independence, and strengthen your accountability with a new group of people.
You can do this. Have fun at the party bro, easy on the hookers and blow.
--- End quote ---
Hookers actually usually have quite a bit of nicotine in them, so I've heard. Anyway. I caved to a cigar once and flipped my whole group and this site off before walking out the door. Two weeks later, I was back to dipping a can a day again. Once you're quit, you're quit. If you open that door a little crack, the nic bitch will push the door wide open, and you'll be wondering where it all went wrong. Tell the guys you're quit, limit alcohol. If some asshole decides it'll be funny to put a cigar in your hand or in your mouth or pocket or butt...however it works in your friend group, take it out, drop it on the floor, and crush it with your boot. That should get the message across.
--- End quote ---
This exact conversation happened a couple weeks ago. Here is a link to that discussion: https://ktcforum.org/index.php?topic=14300.msg7296633#msg7296633
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