I need your support

[zam]

Another reason not to attemp a ninja quit:. What are you gonna say when your wife sees the following text message exchange on your phone. ...

RaginAhole: hey man, I really missed your post yesterday.
You:. Sorry dude, I just texted Brutus, and he's agreed to handle my post today.
RaginAhole:. Great!   Brutus takes care of my post on occasion...BTW, he's bumped a LOT of posts, so I'd be careful! 

[zam]

The simple fact is that it is highly  unlikely that you'll be anything other than a flaming, raging asshole to everyone, including your family, during your fist couple of weeks of withdrawal.  They WILL know something's not right.  You will probably have a day or two where you actually are pissed at your wife because she doesn't agree that everything is fine even though you just went nuclear because she bought the wrong brand toilet paper.  Your wife/family can either 1) assume that you are just a flaming raging asshole in general, or 2) they can assume quitting is tough and help you or give you a temporary pass.   It's your choice.  Ninja dipping works well.  Ninja quitting does not.   

[Dagranger]

To a non addict it seems like something so easy to do...don’t put a weed in your mouth.   But all of us addicts know, what you are going through is knock you on your ass tough sledding.   There is no way around it What you are going through is horrible.   It will suck until it stops sucking.   But believe me Steve, it is worth it.   Make this the last time you ever feel this way and keep grinding.

[SteveD]

I’m now 26 hours in.  Tough going at the moment.  I’m holding strong and appreciate everyone’s support

[AppleJack]

Thanks for the swift kick in the pants AppleJack.  I really needed that.

I’m glad you see it that way, man! There is zero animosity or keyboard syndrome going on here.

You’ve been stuck in an addicted rut for decades and you can’t see for the walls you’ve created. You need to create a new norm and, dude, that’s NOT normal.

You need the perspective from a guy like Worktowin or myself... we’ve been there. We busted down those walls by listening to guys like us saying the same things.

[Vfman]

Congrats on finally coming to the realization that you need to quit! I agree with everyone in regards to your wife. I too hid it from my wife, afraid of her reaction when she found out I had been lying to her. Shit I even signed a notarized letter 4 years ago telling her that I quit. In any case, telling her the truth and making her a part of the quit was the best decision I could have made. You need a solid support system which includes your family at home. Reach out if you need help and go get it!!

[worktowin]

Steve,

Welcome man.  Go read my intro, very similar to yours.  I’m on day 17.  You can absolutely do it, but you have to log in and make that promise every morning to keep that shit out of your mouth.

The first week sucks, it does, no sugar coating it.  But it slowly gets better.  The first feeling I had of euphoria knowing I wasn’t on it anymore was incredible.  I’m still new, but I’m confident and I keep my word.  I wake up, piss and post (WUPP) and I won’t let my brothers down.

Go over to the September group and post roll.  Throw that shit out now and start.  We’re here when you need us.  Phone number is a PM away brother.  Come on in, the waters fine!

Ruthless

Applejack is spot on when telling you you need to change your mindset.  A habit is biting your fingernails or twirling your golden locks.  This is not a habit, it is a full blown addiction.

My advise to you, is flush whatever you have left, I don't care if its full cans or not, flush that shit down the toilet.  So what if you spent money on it, think of the savings you will now have by not buying anymore of it.  Flush it now and then go to your QUIT GROUP and learn how to post roll.  Make your promise TODAY not to use nicotine for the next 24 hours.  When you wake up tomorrow, come back here and make your promise again.  Keep doing that every damn day.  Keep your word.  Since you are making a promise to not only yourself, but also all of us, we take it very personally when someone breaks their promise and caves.
Start exchanging phone numbers with other quitters in your group and some vets. This will start to build your network of accountability as well as give you instant access to support if you need it.

My digits are yours for the asking, just send me a private message.  Accountability is a two way street so I expect your number in return.

You can do this.  I dipped 3 cans a day for over 30 years and I am now 513 days nicotine free. So, I know full well it can be done.

The last piece of advise I have for you is come clean to your wife.  Tell her the truth or it will eat you alive.  Tell her about this site and all the support you are going to get from people that know exactly what you are going to go through.  Let her be a part of your quit if she chooses to. 

Okay, this is really the last thing.  Quit for YOU.  Don't do it for your wife, your kids, your dog.  Do it for you, otherwise you will probably fail.

Let's get this quit going.

Chris

To pile on Chris; I couldn’t agree more about telling your wife.  I was a ninja dipper as well and I opened up to her on day 3.  It was a huge weight off my shoulders and reinforced my quit.  Ninja dippers, like is, have the added anxiety of hiding it and being worried about getting caught.  Talk to your wife; you need her in your corner this first week.

Hi Steve.  My name is Michael, and I probably could have written your post exactly.  I'm 47 now, but today I'm posting day 2,364 days on Kill The Can after about 24 years of being a slave to nicotine (specifically Kodiak Wintergreen).

I joined here and was absolutely terrified.  I couldn't imagine going more than 4 hours without "my friend" and wondered how I'd do it.  Well, I did it.  How?  I just did it.  But, I did it as a team - I joined my group and I posted roll.  I got numbers.  I texted strangers and I talked to strangers on the phone.  One of those strangers was Applejack - the first cat to reply to you.  We text every day now.  Sounds weird?  Yeah, I guess.  Some of the people in my life that I'm the closest with are on this site, and I've never met them in person.  A few have.  But... in the end, we have a lot in common.  You are successful?  Yep, check.  Driven?  Competitive?  Don't lose cause you play to win?  Dude... the men (and a few women) on here are mostly all wired the same.  Some of the brightest, hardest working, most successful, driven, best dads (and moms), most honorable (except for this lie...) people that I know are on here.

I came clean to my wife completely on day 300.  It felt so good to be honest.  Do it when you are ready, or dont... but this is a part of my life that I'm ashamed of, but that is a part of me.  I finally decided that I wanted my wife to know the struggle, and the success, that I went through.  Your call.  Trust me, if Applejack and I can do this, you can do this.  My number is yours for the asking - shoot me a PM if you want it.  We will move mountains to help you bro.  We want to see you win like we are.  Nothing, NOTHING feels better than winning at this.  Because, when you win at this - you know that there isn't anything that you can't accomplish with the correct mindset.

Today is your day.  Lets do this.

[Ruthless]

Steve,

Welcome man.  Go read my intro, very similar to yours.  I’m on day 17.  You can absolutely do it, but you have to log in and make that promise every morning to keep that shit out of your mouth.

The first week sucks, it does, no sugar coating it.  But it slowly gets better.  The first feeling I had of euphoria knowing I wasn’t on it anymore was incredible.  I’m still new, but I’m confident and I keep my word.  I wake up, piss and post (WUPP) and I won’t let my brothers down.

Go over to the September group and post roll.  Throw that shit out now and start.  We’re here when you need us.  Phone number is a PM away brother.  Come on in, the waters fine!

Ruthless

Applejack is spot on when telling you you need to change your mindset.  A habit is biting your fingernails or twirling your golden locks.  This is not a habit, it is a full blown addiction.

My advise to you, is flush whatever you have left, I don't care if its full cans or not, flush that shit down the toilet.  So what if you spent money on it, think of the savings you will now have by not buying anymore of it.  Flush it now and then go to your QUIT GROUP and learn how to post roll.  Make your promise TODAY not to use nicotine for the next 24 hours.  When you wake up tomorrow, come back here and make your promise again.  Keep doing that every damn day.  Keep your word.  Since you are making a promise to not only yourself, but also all of us, we take it very personally when someone breaks their promise and caves.
Start exchanging phone numbers with other quitters in your group and some vets. This will start to build your network of accountability as well as give you instant access to support if you need it.

My digits are yours for the asking, just send me a private message.  Accountability is a two way street so I expect your number in return.

You can do this.  I dipped 3 cans a day for over 30 years and I am now 513 days nicotine free. So, I know full well it can be done.

The last piece of advise I have for you is come clean to your wife.  Tell her the truth or it will eat you alive.  Tell her about this site and all the support you are going to get from people that know exactly what you are going to go through.  Let her be a part of your quit if she chooses to. 

Okay, this is really the last thing.  Quit for YOU.  Don't do it for your wife, your kids, your dog.  Do it for you, otherwise you will probably fail.

Let's get this quit going.

Chris

To pile on Chris; I couldn’t agree more about telling your wife.  I was a ninja dipper as well and I opened up to her on day 3.  It was a huge weight off my shoulders and reinforced my quit.  Ninja dippers, like is, have the added anxiety of hiding it and being worried about getting caught.  Talk to your wife; you need her in your corner this first week.

[chris2alaska]

Steve,

Welcome man.  Go read my intro, very similar to yours.  I’m on day 17.  You can absolutely do it, but you have to log in and make that promise every morning to keep that shit out of your mouth.

The first week sucks, it does, no sugar coating it.  But it slowly gets better.  The first feeling I had of euphoria knowing I wasn’t on it anymore was incredible.  I’m still new, but I’m confident and I keep my word.  I wake up, piss and post (WUPP) and I won’t let my brothers down.

Go over to the September group and post roll.  Throw that shit out now and start.  We’re here when you need us.  Phone number is a PM away brother.  Come on in, the waters fine!

Ruthless

Applejack is spot on when telling you you need to change your mindset.  A habit is biting your fingernails or twirling your golden locks.  This is not a habit, it is a full blown addiction.

My advise to you, is flush whatever you have left, I don't care if its full cans or not, flush that shit down the toilet.  So what if you spent money on it, think of the savings you will now have by not buying anymore of it.  Flush it now and then go to your QUIT GROUP and learn how to post roll.  Make your promise TODAY not to use nicotine for the next 24 hours.  When you wake up tomorrow, come back here and make your promise again.  Keep doing that every damn day.  Keep your word.  Since you are making a promise to not only yourself, but also all of us, we take it very personally when someone breaks their promise and caves.
Start exchanging phone numbers with other quitters in your group and some vets. This will start to build your network of accountability as well as give you instant access to support if you need it.

My digits are yours for the asking, just send me a private message.  Accountability is a two way street so I expect your number in return.

You can do this.  I dipped 3 cans a day for over 30 years and I am now 513 days nicotine free. So, I know full well it can be done.

The last piece of advise I have for you is come clean to your wife.  Tell her the truth or it will eat you alive.  Tell her about this site and all the support you are going to get from people that know exactly what you are going to go through.  Let her be a part of your quit if she chooses to. 

Okay, this is really the last thing.  Quit for YOU.  Don't do it for your wife, your kids, your dog.  Do it for you, otherwise you will probably fail.

Let's get this quit going.

Chris

[Ruthless]

Steve,

Welcome man.  Go read my intro, very similar to yours.  I’m on day 17.  You can absolutely do it, but you have to log in and make that promise every morning to keep that shit out of your mouth.

The first week sucks, it does, no sugar coating it.  But it slowly gets better.  The first feeling I had of euphoria knowing I wasn’t on it anymore was incredible.  I’m still new, but I’m confident and I keep my word.  I wake up, piss and post (WUPP) and I won’t let my brothers down.

Go over to the September group and post roll.  Throw that shit out now and start.  We’re here when you need us.  Phone number is a PM away brother.  Come on in, the waters fine!

Ruthless

[SteveD]

Thanks for the swift kick in the pants AppleJack.  I really needed that.

[AppleJack]

I feel so ashamed and embarrassed to be typing in this forum today.  I am a 43 year old, married, father of two.  I'm a successful business man and a overall good guy.  I've been a closet dipper since I was 17 years old.  I need to quit and I need to quit now.

I still remember my first dip.  I was playing baseball in high school and struggling my senior year.  I had aspirations to play in college and knew I had the ability to do so.  I felt so much pressure to succeed.  A guy on my team told me to try it and I did.  Next thing you know I start hitting the ball great and playing fantastic.  I did end up playing 4 years in college, but unfortunately kept up that habit.  My girlfriend at the time, now my wife, knew I did it.  After I graduated, I told her I quit. 

I think I might have had a few days off here an there early on, but I never really quit.  I learned to hide it well.  I would always put the dip in my lower left jaw and hide it.  A nice pocket formed in my mouth that really helped disguise it.  Soon I didn't even need to spit.  I got a job out of college and even started doing it at work when no one was looking.  Then I started putting one in as soon as I got up and leaving it in until lunch.  I'd put in another after lunch and take it out right before dinner.  Of course I would put another in after dinner until it was time for bed.  I repeated this horrible habit the next 25 years of my life.

I've kept this habit from my family for the most part.  I think my wife really knows I still do it and my daughter approached me in tears a month ago saying she saw me put one in.  She probably did.  I denied it and told her that I am fine.

Today I went to the dentist and for the first time I was asked if I use smokeless tobacco.  I denied it and said I like to suck on hard candy in that part of my mouth. 

I'm tired of lying.  I'm tired of the expense.  I'm tired of hiding cans in my sock at business meetings.  I'm tired of all of it, however I'm scared to death to quit.  I've tried on and off several times and have experienced that fog.  I know I need to push through it, but it feels so good when I do it. 

Today is my day.  In a few moments, I will throw out this crap in my mouth, have lunch and return to work for the afternoon.  I will go home, likely very irritable, determined to make it through the day.  I simply have to stop.  This is going to be a challenge, particularly since I don't want to admit to my family my errant ways.  I will return to this group for advice and help.  Hopefully a kind soul is there to provide encouragement. 

I've been on this site several times in the past.  I have always been hesitant to post anything, because I knew if I did I would almost certainly have to quit.  I don't like letting people down when I tell them I'm going to do something.  Hopefully that's the case here.  I will check back in on Monday with an update.  Hopefully I will be on Day 3 of my quit.  Wish me luck and thanks for reading.

Welcome in.

To start with... this can be done. I dipped for 25 years and 2 cans a day for the last 10-12 years. Absolute junkie status.
I’m 6+ years Quit today... 2,250 days to be exact.

Now... I need to point out a huuuuge number of red flags in your post. Your mindset needs to change bro. To succeed... you need to understand a few things:

You are an addict. Nicotine owns you right now. You are addicted to it. This is not something as fluffy as a “habit”. Nicotine is as addictive as heroin and as powerful as strychnine. You... are an addict. You need to understand that. You need to feel the weight of it. It’s important in your mindset.

We do not hope or try here... we do. Period. Own this shit, man! Own your decision to Quit. This place has a design to it and it’s purposeful... you get involved and you become a part of a quit group and you promise DAILY to keep nicotine out of your body and you OWN IT! We do not like occasional “check ins”... this is not Facebook or some other idiotic social media bullshit. You get in here and fight along side those in your group who are in it at the same level you are... it’s called support. You take AND you give and you get stronger and you get through this to the other side together.

Doing it on your own sucks. Where’s the accountability? You are not alone in your fight and you have NO idea how empowering that is to know.

Own. It.
Do not let fear drive you... you’re a human being, for God’s sake... do NOT let a tin of weeds and chemical run your life anymore. It makes you lie... it steals your money... it fucks your health.

Don’t “try” this. Fuck that.
Be better.
Do this.

Freedom is there... you gotta pay a price to get there but, bro, it’s worth it.

[SteveD]

I feel so ashamed and embarrassed to be typing in this forum today.  I am a 43 year old, married, father of two.  I'm a successful business man and a overall good guy.  I've been a closet dipper since I was 17 years old.  I need to quit and I need to quit now.

I still remember my first dip.  I was playing baseball in high school and struggling my senior year.  I had aspirations to play in college and knew I had the ability to do so.  I felt so much pressure to succeed.  A guy on my team told me to try it and I did.  Next thing you know I start hitting the ball great and playing fantastic.  I did end up playing 4 years in college, but unfortunately kept up that habit.  My girlfriend at the time, now my wife, knew I did it.  After I graduated, I told her I quit. 

I think I might have had a few days off here an there early on, but I never really quit.  I learned to hide it well.  I would always put the dip in my lower left jaw and hide it.  A nice pocket formed in my mouth that really helped disguise it.  Soon I didn't even need to spit.  I got a job out of college and even started doing it at work when no one was looking.  Then I started putting one in as soon as I got up and leaving it in until lunch.  I'd put in another after lunch and take it out right before dinner.  Of course I would put another in after dinner until it was time for bed.  I repeated this horrible habit the next 25 years of my life.

I've kept this habit from my family for the most part.  I think my wife really knows I still do it and my daughter approached me in tears a month ago saying she saw me put one in.  She probably did.  I denied it and told her that I am fine.

Today I went to the dentist and for the first time I was asked if I use smokeless tobacco.  I denied it and said I like to suck on hard candy in that part of my mouth. 

I'm tired of lying.  I'm tired of the expense.  I'm tired of hiding cans in my sock at business meetings.  I'm tired of all of it, however I'm scared to death to quit.  I've tried on and off several times and have experienced that fog.  I know I need to push through it, but it feels so good when I do it. 

Today is my day.  In a few moments, I will throw out this crap in my mouth, have lunch and return to work for the afternoon.  I will go home, likely very irritable, determined to make it through the day.  I simply have to stop.  This is going to be a challenge, particularly since I don't want to admit to my family my errant ways.  I will return to this group for advice and help.  Hopefully a kind soul is there to provide encouragement. 

I've been on this site several times in the past.  I have always been hesitant to post anything, because I knew if I did I would almost certainly have to quit.  I don't like letting people down when I tell them I'm going to do something.  Hopefully that's the case here.  I will check back in on Monday with an update.  Hopefully I will be on Day 3 of my quit.  Wish me luck and thanks for reading.