Author Topic: i'm ready, not ready, just do it  (Read 8692 times)

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Offline 69franx

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #42 on: December 08, 2019, 05:57:06 PM »
I wouldn't mind when we hang out that you and I still refer to each other by our KTC names. Damn dude 100 days.... Dude 100 days. So not including our group chat, live chat, PMs and Post, the phone call. You and I have sent A LOT of texts to each other. To say we are friends is an insult. You are my brother @KD2. I'm lost for words because we have had so many conversations. Where do I even begin? You and I have shared an amazing quit together. We took that brotherhood to the heart. Since day 1 you and I were on the same page on everything. When you were on Day 1....I was on Day 11.. and you and I are in two different groups lol. Why am I just realizing that now. How random is that? I still remember when I first sent you that message I said. "I GOT YOU MY DUDE." And you jumped in my arms and we beat that that NicBitch down One Day at A Time. You always let me be me and trusted that I would show you an awesome way to quit. Hows the ride so far? You dont got to answer that.. your 100 days shows that everything we have been through was worth it. Damn KD not many people can say @SixString doesnt know what to say. It's really impossible to find ways to say how awesome our friendship is. Like is it crazy to say that I feel blessed to have someone like you on my team so early in my quit? Remember I joined KTC at day 6 so that means I wasnt even a full week into all of this when we became brothers. Remember all those ideas and and goals I had for KTC? Dude I hope I made you proud with who I am as a quitter. You watched me transform into this quit machine. Isnt that crazy? Would I have been the same way if I didnt meet you? Who knows.. I dont have to worry about that because I got best case scenario. All those post about positivity and motivation I wrote.. you helped me write those... all those funny drop the mic moments... you inspired me to  to write those.. People look up to me and it's crazy to think about.. That's all because you of you bro. You embraced me being @SixString..... How do I even say thank you for that? Even when the outfit didn't match the style. You trusted that all my intentions were always about helping us become better quitters. I can go on and on. You of all people should know that. But this is just the beginning.. the real test is going to happen now. You are going to really see all those hours of communication with each other pay off. Our friendship can be summarized to this. ACCOUNTABILITY+BROTHERHOOD=SUCCESS. I heard an amazing story about what a KTC member had with another brother on this site... Immediately my first response was that's what you and I have together. You know him as well. I'll text you the name and you can ask him yourself. I'm sure he wont mind telling you. Its your 100. Just tell him I sent you and it will strengthen our quit... dude how awesome is that.... 100 days baby. 100 days heres my war cry for you one time
WHOOOOLALOOLALOOOWHAWHOOWEELOO

100 days of winning!  What a fantastic day!  So proud for you, and for your family. This is the greatest gift you could ever give to them too. Even better days are ahead... keep doing exactly what you are doing!!
Congrats on hitting the HOF KD2! I know with these guys ^^^ on your side that you aren't going anywhere anytime soon. Just keep kicking nic's ass and making connections. WUPPING ODAATEDD makes the quit world go round, never forget that
ABQ= Always Be Quitting

My Intro
My HOF Speech
How long have I been quit?


I brew the beer I drink, what's your superpower?


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HOF: 11/08/17     2nd Floor: 02/16/18     3rd Floor: 05/27/18     1st trip around the sun: 07/31/18     4th Floor: 09/04/18     5th floor: 12/13/18     6th floor: 03/23/2019     7th floor: 07/01/19     2nd trip around the sun: 07/31/19     8th floor: 10/09/19     9th floor: 01/17/20     Comma Day: 04/26/2020     3rd trip around the sun: 08/01/2020     11th floor: 08/04/2020     12th Floor: 11/12/2020     13th floor: 02/20/2021     14th floor: 05/31/2021

Offline ankape

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #41 on: December 08, 2019, 12:28:42 PM »
 'dance' 'Party'
Congratulations on HOF KD2!!

Offline KD2

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #40 on: December 08, 2019, 09:22:08 AM »
I wouldn't mind when we hang out that you and I still refer to each other by our KTC names. Damn dude 100 days.... Dude 100 days. So not including our group chat, live chat, PMs and Post, the phone call. You and I have sent A LOT of texts to each other. To say we are friends is an insult. You are my brother @KD2. I'm lost for words because we have had so many conversations. Where do I even begin? You and I have shared an amazing quit together. We took that brotherhood to the heart. Since day 1 you and I were on the same page on everything. When you were on Day 1....I was on Day 11.. and you and I are in two different groups lol. Why am I just realizing that now. How random is that? I still remember when I first sent you that message I said. "I GOT YOU MY DUDE." And you jumped in my arms and we beat that that NicBitch down One Day at A Time. You always let me be me and trusted that I would show you an awesome way to quit. Hows the ride so far? You dont got to answer that.. your 100 days shows that everything we have been through was worth it. Damn KD not many people can say @SixString doesnt know what to say. It's really impossible to find ways to say how awesome our friendship is. Like is it crazy to say that I feel blessed to have someone like you on my team so early in my quit? Remember I joined KTC at day 6 so that means I wasnt even a full week into all of this when we became brothers. Remember all those ideas and and goals I had for KTC? Dude I hope I made you proud with who I am as a quitter. You watched me transform into this quit machine. Isnt that crazy? Would I have been the same way if I didnt meet you? Who knows.. I dont have to worry about that because I got best case scenario. All those post about positivity and motivation I wrote.. you helped me write those... all those funny drop the mic moments... you inspired me to  to write those.. People look up to me and it's crazy to think about.. That's all because you of you bro. You embraced me being @SixString..... How do I even say thank you for that? Even when the outfit didn't match the style. You trusted that all my intentions were always about helping us become better quitters. I can go on and on. You of all people should know that. But this is just the beginning.. the real test is going to happen now. You are going to really see all those hours of communication with each other pay off. Our friendship can be summarized to this. ACCOUNTABILITY+BROTHERHOOD=SUCCESS. I heard an amazing story about what a KTC member had with another brother on this site... Immediately my first response was that's what you and I have together. You know him as well. I'll text you the name and you can ask him yourself. I'm sure he wont mind telling you. Its your 100. Just tell him I sent you and it will strengthen our quit... dude how awesome is that.... 100 days baby. 100 days heres my war cry for you one time
WHOOOOLALOOLALOOOWHAWHOOWEELOO

@SixString To be included in your quit journey at such an early stage is such an honor ... they say life of about timing... and my quit luckily coincided with yours and who knows how I'd be doing without you. You understand my funny word I use to describe what we’re in search of in our quits. You were the guy I talk to at my daughter soccer games with inspiration - I remember having to do a support pickup for you during a game. Haha. You’re who I text when I land at an airport to recommit I’m not going to dip. You are too cool for words and love you man. Big hug and let’s keep it rolling and continue to look back together at that wall we’re distancing ourselves ODAAT.

Offline worktowin

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #39 on: December 08, 2019, 08:19:57 AM »
I wouldn't mind when we hang out that you and I still refer to each other by our KTC names. Damn dude 100 days.... Dude 100 days. So not including our group chat, live chat, PMs and Post, the phone call. You and I have sent A LOT of texts to each other. To say we are friends is an insult. You are my brother @KD2. I'm lost for words because we have had so many conversations. Where do I even begin? You and I have shared an amazing quit together. We took that brotherhood to the heart. Since day 1 you and I were on the same page on everything. When you were on Day 1....I was on Day 11.. and you and I are in two different groups lol. Why am I just realizing that now. How random is that? I still remember when I first sent you that message I said. "I GOT YOU MY DUDE." And you jumped in my arms and we beat that that NicBitch down One Day at A Time. You always let me be me and trusted that I would show you an awesome way to quit. Hows the ride so far? You dont got to answer that.. your 100 days shows that everything we have been through was worth it. Damn KD not many people can say @SixString doesnt know what to say. It's really impossible to find ways to say how awesome our friendship is. Like is it crazy to say that I feel blessed to have someone like you on my team so early in my quit? Remember I joined KTC at day 6 so that means I wasnt even a full week into all of this when we became brothers. Remember all those ideas and and goals I had for KTC? Dude I hope I made you proud with who I am as a quitter. You watched me transform into this quit machine. Isnt that crazy? Would I have been the same way if I didnt meet you? Who knows.. I dont have to worry about that because I got best case scenario. All those post about positivity and motivation I wrote.. you helped me write those... all those funny drop the mic moments... you inspired me to  to write those.. People look up to me and it's crazy to think about.. That's all because you of you bro. You embraced me being @SixString..... How do I even say thank you for that? Even when the outfit didn't match the style. You trusted that all my intentions were always about helping us become better quitters. I can go on and on. You of all people should know that. But this is just the beginning.. the real test is going to happen now. You are going to really see all those hours of communication with each other pay off. Our friendship can be summarized to this. ACCOUNTABILITY+BROTHERHOOD=SUCCESS. I heard an amazing story about what a KTC member had with another brother on this site... Immediately my first response was that's what you and I have together. You know him as well. I'll text you the name and you can ask him yourself. I'm sure he wont mind telling you. Its your 100. Just tell him I sent you and it will strengthen our quit... dude how awesome is that.... 100 days baby. 100 days heres my war cry for you one time
WHOOOOLALOOLALOOOWHAWHOOWEELOO

100 days of winning!  What a fantastic day!  So proud for you, and for your family. This is the greatest gift you could ever give to them too. Even better days are ahead... keep doing exactly what you are doing!!

Offline SixString

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #38 on: December 08, 2019, 01:44:25 AM »
I wouldn't mind when we hang out that you and I still refer to each other by our KTC names. Damn dude 100 days.... Dude 100 days. So not including our group chat, live chat, PMs and Post, the phone call. You and I have sent A LOT of texts to each other. To say we are friends is an insult. You are my brother @KD2. I'm lost for words because we have had so many conversations. Where do I even begin? You and I have shared an amazing quit together. We took that brotherhood to the heart. Since day 1 you and I were on the same page on everything. When you were on Day 1....I was on Day 11.. and you and I are in two different groups lol. Why am I just realizing that now. How random is that? I still remember when I first sent you that message I said. "I GOT YOU MY DUDE." And you jumped in my arms and we beat that that NicBitch down One Day at A Time. You always let me be me and trusted that I would show you an awesome way to quit. Hows the ride so far? You dont got to answer that.. your 100 days shows that everything we have been through was worth it. Damn KD not many people can say @SixString doesnt know what to say. It's really impossible to find ways to say how awesome our friendship is. Like is it crazy to say that I feel blessed to have someone like you on my team so early in my quit? Remember I joined KTC at day 6 so that means I wasnt even a full week into all of this when we became brothers. Remember all those ideas and and goals I had for KTC? Dude I hope I made you proud with who I am as a quitter. You watched me transform into this quit machine. Isnt that crazy? Would I have been the same way if I didnt meet you? Who knows.. I dont have to worry about that because I got best case scenario. All those post about positivity and motivation I wrote.. you helped me write those... all those funny drop the mic moments... you inspired me to  to write those.. People look up to me and it's crazy to think about.. That's all because you of you bro. You embraced me being @SixString..... How do I even say thank you for that? Even when the outfit didn't match the style. You trusted that all my intentions were always about helping us become better quitters. I can go on and on. You of all people should know that. But this is just the beginning.. the real test is going to happen now. You are going to really see all those hours of communication with each other pay off. Our friendship can be summarized to this. ACCOUNTABILITY+BROTHERHOOD=SUCCESS. I heard an amazing story about what a KTC member had with another brother on this site... Immediately my first response was that's what you and I have together. You know him as well. I'll text you the name and you can ask him yourself. I'm sure he wont mind telling you. Its your 100. Just tell him I sent you and it will strengthen our quit... dude how awesome is that.... 100 days baby. 100 days heres my war cry for you one time
WHOOOOLALOOLALOOOWHAWHOOWEELOO

Offline 69franx

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #37 on: December 02, 2019, 01:05:41 PM »
Day 92 had a awesome day with the family today. Craft fair, brewery (still didn’t drink but bought some cool beers), train ride in the park, friggin paddle boat ride in the park, movie in bed, turkey sanguches (how my wife’s mom from Colombia pronounces it - that I love). My head is just clear. Tough to describe but it goes back to being a kid (likely before dipping so say 14) still have some innocence like what could go wrong today. I’m pure. I got a taste of that today. Pure love ... unhindered by a foreign substance I’d ‘love’ used to think of as a friend.

I had a fake dip dream last night. I still use fake dip off and on. Sometimes just keep it in my pocket ... like changing a light in the ladder yesterday my wife could see the circle and she didn’t say anything but wonder in her eye...anyway in the dream there were three fake dip cans and a real one and i thought that’s odd... that one should not be here. Before removing it to the trash I stuffed my lip with the fake. It still weird to me how the fake is ‘surprisingly satisfying’. I need to try to sell that slogan to Smokey mountain!

I’ve told some I feel weird going into the stretch for hof ... like let me stay here and keep the fight young, double digit young, I know how to quit double digit style. I remember thinking that dude is 7 days quit, holy shit - the day before I quit...now I see the guy 4000 days or whatever and then I remind myself to get back to earth and quit for today. Let’s just say I’m nervous in the quit (not that I’m gonna cave ... nervous about all the responsibility it brings I should say) and want to stay that way if that’s what it takes to keep it front and center every damn day. When I was not quit it’s a f’d up mentality easy to say f it  to stuff...and then throw in more toxins to your body...being quit I’m grown up, and deal with shit. Staying clean. Being pure today. Join me again tomorrow.

@KD2  you are doing great. Keep following your routine and let the days add up one day at a time. Proud to quit with you.
Awesome stuff here KD2! Damn proud to be quit with you
ABQ= Always Be Quitting

My Intro
My HOF Speech
How long have I been quit?


I brew the beer I drink, what's your superpower?


Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


HOF: 11/08/17     2nd Floor: 02/16/18     3rd Floor: 05/27/18     1st trip around the sun: 07/31/18     4th Floor: 09/04/18     5th floor: 12/13/18     6th floor: 03/23/2019     7th floor: 07/01/19     2nd trip around the sun: 07/31/19     8th floor: 10/09/19     9th floor: 01/17/20     Comma Day: 04/26/2020     3rd trip around the sun: 08/01/2020     11th floor: 08/04/2020     12th Floor: 11/12/2020     13th floor: 02/20/2021     14th floor: 05/31/2021

Offline Keith0617

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #36 on: December 02, 2019, 08:30:39 AM »
Day 92 had a awesome day with the family today. Craft fair, brewery (still didn’t drink but bought some cool beers), train ride in the park, friggin paddle boat ride in the park, movie in bed, turkey sanguches (how my wife’s mom from Colombia pronounces it - that I love). My head is just clear. Tough to describe but it goes back to being a kid (likely before dipping so say 14) still have some innocence like what could go wrong today. I’m pure. I got a taste of that today. Pure love ... unhindered by a foreign substance I’d ‘love’ used to think of as a friend.

I had a fake dip dream last night. I still use fake dip off and on. Sometimes just keep it in my pocket ... like changing a light in the ladder yesterday my wife could see the circle and she didn’t say anything but wonder in her eye...anyway in the dream there were three fake dip cans and a real one and i thought that’s odd... that one should not be here. Before removing it to the trash I stuffed my lip with the fake. It still weird to me how the fake is ‘surprisingly satisfying’. I need to try to sell that slogan to Smokey mountain!

I’ve told some I feel weird going into the stretch for hof ... like let me stay here and keep the fight young, double digit young, I know how to quit double digit style. I remember thinking that dude is 7 days quit, holy shit - the day before I quit...now I see the guy 4000 days or whatever and then I remind myself to get back to earth and quit for today. Let’s just say I’m nervous in the quit (not that I’m gonna cave ... nervous about all the responsibility it brings I should say) and want to stay that way if that’s what it takes to keep it front and center every damn day. When I was not quit it’s a f’d up mentality easy to say f it  to stuff...and then throw in more toxins to your body...being quit I’m grown up, and deal with shit. Staying clean. Being pure today. Join me again tomorrow.

@KD2  you are doing great. Keep following your routine and let the days add up one day at a time. Proud to quit with you.
Jan19

Offline KD2

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #35 on: November 30, 2019, 11:03:12 PM »
Day 92 had a awesome day with the family today. Craft fair, brewery (still didn’t drink but bought some cool beers), train ride in the park, friggin paddle boat ride in the park, movie in bed, turkey sanguches (how my wife’s mom from Colombia pronounces it - that I love). My head is just clear. Tough to describe but it goes back to being a kid (likely before dipping so say 14) still have some innocence like what could go wrong today. I’m pure. I got a taste of that today. Pure love ... unhindered by a foreign substance I’d ‘love’ used to think of as a friend.

I had a fake dip dream last night. I still use fake dip off and on. Sometimes just keep it in my pocket ... like changing a light in the ladder yesterday my wife could see the circle and she didn’t say anything but wonder in her eye...anyway in the dream there were three fake dip cans and a real one and i thought that’s odd... that one should not be here. Before removing it to the trash I stuffed my lip with the fake. It still weird to me how the fake is ‘surprisingly satisfying’. I need to try to sell that slogan to Smokey mountain!

I’ve told some I feel weird going into the stretch for hof ... like let me stay here and keep the fight young, double digit young, I know how to quit double digit style. I remember thinking that dude is 7 days quit, holy shit - the day before I quit...now I see the guy 4000 days or whatever and then I remind myself to get back to earth and quit for today. Let’s just say I’m nervous in the quit (not that I’m gonna cave ... nervous about all the responsibility it brings I should say) and want to stay that way if that’s what it takes to keep it front and center every damn day. When I was not quit it’s a f’d up mentality easy to say f it  to stuff...and then throw in more toxins to your body...being quit I’m grown up, and deal with shit. Staying clean. Being pure today. Join me again tomorrow.

Offline EXBEARHAG

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #34 on: November 16, 2019, 05:06:29 PM »
@KD2
That's some inspirational shit man.  I find myself saying this often on the site but, we seem to have a lot in common.  What I related to most was your description of crying due to your emotions.  There have been several occasions in the last 124 days when my emotions got the best of me and I found myself bawling for little to no reason.  Good to know we are not in this alone and our symptoms are not unique.
PTBQWYT my friend.

Offline KD2

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #33 on: November 15, 2019, 08:47:18 PM »
Day 77 and want to share a win like I’m super stoked in this quit right now. I made it back from a week long stressful work travel...would have been prime dipping time...I broke through the inertia of being alone away from my family and staying quit with the help of @SixString and @jsjohnson. You know how many times I ‘stopped’ just to start when I got alone and went on a trip without the wife. Can I do it again and stay quit one more day back home? I think so cause I’m not getting a can on my way home! Again a first. Happy and love the support. See you at the Houston meetup on Monday everyone!

Offline Keith0617

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #32 on: November 11, 2019, 08:14:52 AM »
Day 72 today was tough...a couple few second rage outbursts ....like a valve release on a pressure cooker ... and some emotional shit just dealing with the day crap we had going on and compounded with having to leave my family this upcoming week for work travel... sometimes I wonder how much of the emotional rollercoaster is the quit and how much is just my normal life craziness! At some point it’s just life and it’s not any ‘tougher’ nic free .... should be less complicated cause I’ve got one less problem!

Super stoked for the Houston meet on 18th...there was one today I couldn’t make but saw a photo and am so grateful to know there are such bad ass quitters so close. So proud to quit with you all today.

@KD2    you are doing great. Keep using your tools and posting roll. It really is amazing the different in how you feel from day 100 to 200. Huge difference. 200 - 300 is even greater. Now over 400 days life is pretty great. Be patient, stay loyal to your routine, and know each day gets better.
Jan19

Offline KD2

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #31 on: November 10, 2019, 11:21:17 PM »
Day 72 today was tough...a couple few second rage outbursts ....like a valve release on a pressure cooker ... and some emotional shit just dealing with the day crap we had going on and compounded with having to leave my family this upcoming week for work travel... sometimes I wonder how much of the emotional rollercoaster is the quit and how much is just my normal life craziness! At some point it’s just life and it’s not any ‘tougher’ nic free .... should be less complicated cause I’ve got one less problem!

Super stoked for the Houston meet on 18th...there was one today I couldn’t make but saw a photo and am so grateful to know there are such bad ass quitters so close. So proud to quit with you all today.

Offline BluManChew

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #30 on: November 05, 2019, 05:34:04 PM »
Day 63 and I’m feeling the blues again. I think it’s part of this quit journey. I know it is. If you’re a soon to be quitter and reading this don’t let it deter you! It’s been a lot of super awesome quit days. So happy to be quit and good things are happening in the universe that this quit is positively influencing.

I’m writing this just to remember this a a week or two or next year how I’m dealing with my self and my new identity as a quit man.

I want to be open about my insecurity with being quit. It’s what keeps me quit...keeping it front and center. There’s been a couple days I didn’t wupp because I was irresponsible (i.e. dealing with life w/o making my morning promise) and then I got anxiety like holy shit this is dangerous and it goes away after I post.

Last night I had another dip dream...one I’ve had before and it’s where I’ve dipped one time then quit again and continue to post roll without admitting it to anyone. Its that dipper guilt that’s part of the addiction. It’s that seeing and hearing about other KTC members that have done that is my haunt. Going back to that dipper identity, lies, and all the baggage is my literal nightmare!

Am I not reaching out to enough people? I often wonder. It’s been a while since getting some new digits...and like tpedro skips roll twice and I don’t have his digits ... is that my fault? It’s emotional to me that dude isn’t here...I was 17 days quit and remember reading his intro...makes me cry he’s going to be super depressed being caved.

Getting to hate and despise dip. Looking back feeling sick from all the nicotine is what I remember. If I felt sick all the time...I could go longer without having one I’d think if I felt sick...But then I’d still get in my car and throw more in and feel sick again. Were there good times? Those first months? Years? I don’t think so...lost dates, lost money, anti social, rather being alone dipping than being a friend. I despise dip. I love KTC. I love my crew...my cuttoff to WUPP is 8am. Thank you ss for taking me under your wing. Just having a good cry....and feeling better it comes in waves.

Maybe I should post when I’m feeling good next time! I can be positive and happy too!
You got this brother...you inspire me.  You are one of the best quitters I know...I am proud to be quit with you today.
Great post, @KD2 !  This is the time to really grind it out because you are not cured and your brain is rewiring and will continue to do so for some time.  Hang in there.

Offline jsjohnson

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #29 on: November 02, 2019, 09:22:11 AM »
Day 63 and I’m feeling the blues again. I think it’s part of this quit journey. I know it is. If you’re a soon to be quitter and reading this don’t let it deter you! It’s been a lot of super awesome quit days. So happy to be quit and good things are happening in the universe that this quit is positively influencing.

I’m writing this just to remember this a a week or two or next year how I’m dealing with my self and my new identity as a quit man.

I want to be open about my insecurity with being quit. It’s what keeps me quit...keeping it front and center. There’s been a couple days I didn’t wupp because I was irresponsible (i.e. dealing with life w/o making my morning promise) and then I got anxiety like holy shit this is dangerous and it goes away after I post.

Last night I had another dip dream...one I’ve had before and it’s where I’ve dipped one time then quit again and continue to post roll without admitting it to anyone. Its that dipper guilt that’s part of the addiction. It’s that seeing and hearing about other KTC members that have done that is my haunt. Going back to that dipper identity, lies, and all the baggage is my literal nightmare!

Am I not reaching out to enough people? I often wonder. It’s been a while since getting some new digits...and like tpedro skips roll twice and I don’t have his digits ... is that my fault? It’s emotional to me that dude isn’t here...I was 17 days quit and remember reading his intro...makes me cry he’s going to be super depressed being caved.

Getting to hate and despise dip. Looking back feeling sick from all the nicotine is what I remember. If I felt sick all the time...I could go longer without having one I’d think if I felt sick...But then I’d still get in my car and throw more in and feel sick again. Were there good times? Those first months? Years? I don’t think so...lost dates, lost money, anti social, rather being alone dipping than being a friend. I despise dip. I love KTC. I love my crew...my cuttoff to WUPP is 8am. Thank you ss for taking me under your wing. Just having a good cry....and feeling better it comes in waves.

Maybe I should post when I’m feeling good next time! I can be positive and happy too!
You got this brother...you inspire me.  You are one of the best quitters I know...I am proud to be quit with you today.
Wildirish intro https://ktcforum.org/index.php?topic=805.msg125916#msg125916

"So if any of you still have friends dippin tell them this if you dont have what it takes to quit nicotine you are gonna be TOO big of a pussy for chemo."  -Todd Garcia (Traumagnet)

My HOF Speech

Offline Nomore1959

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Re: i'm ready, not ready, just do it
« Reply #28 on: November 02, 2019, 08:32:20 AM »
Day 63 and I’m feeling the blues again. I think it’s part of this quit journey. I know it is. If you’re a soon to be quitter and reading this don’t let it deter you! It’s been a lot of super awesome quit days. So happy to be quit and good things are happening in the universe that this quit is positively influencing.

I’m writing this just to remember this a a week or two or next year how I’m dealing with my self and my new identity as a quit man.

I want to be open about my insecurity with being quit. It’s what keeps me quit...keeping it front and center. There’s been a couple days I didn’t wupp because I was irresponsible (i.e. dealing with life w/o making my morning promise) and then I got anxiety like holy shit this is dangerous and it goes away after I post.

Last night I had another dip dream...one I’ve had before and it’s where I’ve dipped one time then quit again and continue to post roll without admitting it to anyone. Its that dipper guilt that’s part of the addiction. It’s that seeing and hearing about other KTC members that have done that is my haunt. Going back to that dipper identity, lies, and all the baggage is my literal nightmare!

Am I not reaching out to enough people? I often wonder. It’s been a while since getting some new digits...and like tpedro skips roll twice and I don’t have his digits ... is that my fault? It’s emotional to me that dude isn’t here...I was 17 days quit and remember reading his intro...makes me cry he’s going to be super depressed being caved.

Getting to hate and despise dip. Looking back feeling sick from all the nicotine is what I remember. If I felt sick all the time...I could go longer without having one I’d think if I felt sick...But then I’d still get in my car and throw more in and feel sick again. Were there good times? Those first months? Years? I don’t think so...lost dates, lost money, anti social, rather being alone dipping than being a friend. I despise dip. I love KTC. I love my crew...my cuttoff to WUPP is 8am. Thank you ss for taking me under your wing. Just having a good cry....and feeling better it comes in waves.

Maybe I should post when I’m feeling good next time! I can be positive and happy too!

That’s a common dip dream.  And just past half way to Hall of Fame is normal for a funk.  A couple things to remember:

1. It will be a bit of a rollercoaster ride going forward.

2. It will get better than you can imagine as you heal.

Post your up and down days in here.  Then should you hit another funk you will know “this too shall pass.”

Quit hard!