I'm a 44 year old baseball playin', deer/duck/anything that moves huntin', fishin' country-boy from Arkansas, that grew up around snuff.
One of my earliest memories was watching a guy from my neighborhood pack a can. I thought it was SO COOL the way he could "pop" it with his finger. It basically became a "right of passage" to learn how to do it. Then, don't get me started on how cool it was to have to "can ring" pocket...the country girls really dug it. During my day time, dipping was as normal as breathing, and I couldn't have been much more than 10 when I took that first pinch. "It's just Hawkins, that ain't going to hurt anybody!"
Well, Hawkins lead to Skoal, which lead to Copenhagen, which lead to a cheaper Red Seal, which has lead to a never-ending cycle of pre-mature hair loss, tooth gum decay, bad skin, etc. Then, 6 years ago, I got re-married promised my wife I'd quit, and I did...until last summer. Over 5 years of being done with it...down the freaking tubes.
I've used the excuse of the fact that I've started coaching legion baseball, and I'm around it again as an excuse, but the truth is...I'm an addict, I'm weak, it's completely my fault. What's bad thing is that I've thought that I've been able to hide it from my wife (I didn't want to face the shame). Then the other night she saw a Facebook post about a guy that had to have oral surgery caused by dipping, and she told me "I'd really like for you to quit dipping again".
The only one I've hid it from has been myself. I'm tired of lying to myself, I'm tired of putting it off, and "it's about damn time" for me to put this phase of my my life behind me for good. I know, from experience, that the next few weeks are going to suck (bad!). But unlike before, I've come across this site, and I'm excited about having some folks to help keep me accountable. I've joined the April 2017 HOF group looking forward to helping others as they help me.
So...all of you veterans out there with 300, 400, 500 day counts...I encourage you to continue to keep your guards up, because all it takes is a little slip up, a little arrogance of thinking you have this thing whipped, and the next thing you know...you're right back at square 1.