Author Topic: Day one  (Read 28426 times)

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Offline EXBEARHAG

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Re: Day one
« Reply #31 on: December 07, 2019, 03:22:49 PM »
Olcpo,
Thanks for taking the time to write down your experiences.  Reading through your posts has helped me crush a crave and renewed my will for the next couple seconds, minute, hour...who knows.  Keep it up man.  You're doing great. 

Offline SixString

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Re: Day one
« Reply #30 on: December 07, 2019, 01:20:39 PM »
day 12 - The good outweighs the bad: Days, energy, getting things done, lack of the fog funk, no guilt over crap in my lip, not worried about the next can, looking for the next thing to change in this life, the feeling of moving on to the next great adventure. "Thy loving kindness is everlasting."

Heading out to get a Christmas tree today. Feeling good. I had a great visit with my Physical Therapist yesterday. She has turned into almost a life coach. She literally exploded when I told her I was 11 days quit. The most animated I had seen her. "That is HUGE!", she said. She started in on all I had to look forward to as the nicotine leaves and the healing begins. Most encouraging. She was impressed as I shared what KTC is and does, she especially liked WUPP. We talked at length about lifestyle changes and habits. She chronicled all of my physical changes since I started with her. The take away was how much I take progress for granted, almost greedily grasping for that next hurdle without taking into account and being grateful for what has been accomplished.

I came to KTC because I could not do it on my own. I feel I was led here, as I was praying for grace and giving it to God (surrender) because I couldn't do it. A websearch later...now 12 days quit and looking at the next hurdle. I am grateful for the quit. I am just beginning to glimpse what I have sacrificed for years to the nicotine gods. The First Commandment, "Thou shalt have no other gods before Me, thou shalt not bow down to them nor worship them..." . I can easily and definitely place the driven worship of tobacco/nicotine and the "religious" habit within those words. I never realized it. Insidious. Nothing got in the way of my habit, I Always made sure I had chew, no matter what. Were I so diligent to other things in my life.

So now I am seeking and rooting out the other "gods". What else have I allowed to creep in and take me away from that which is important? Andycan talks about the exponential changes that accompanied his quit. I see it too.

As always, these are my thoughts and what works for me. PTQWYT
Olcpo - out
@olcpo I too fall into that that religion of nicotine. Grizzly wintergreen is all I worshipped. Even now I can still smell that wintergreen as if there was a can in front of me. I didnt care who or what I destroyed as long as I got my fix. But dont you dare come in front of me and my tin. I will bite your head off. Crazy how the addict mind works. KTC is the only thing that has successfully helped me stay quit. 110 days here brother I promise you it does get better. I'm gonna steal a post from someone who has helped me navigate my journey through quit..
think about the things you've heard people say in life...

-man I wish I had a different job
-I sure wish I hadn't had that 4th kid with my sister (I'm from the ozarks, ok?)
-I never should have gotten married
-I hate my house.

Have you ever, ever heard a single person say " I wish I had never quit smoking/chewing?"

Stay strong you are doing fantastic I'm always a PM away if you need anything

Offline olcpo

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Re: Day one
« Reply #29 on: December 07, 2019, 11:25:12 AM »
day 12 - The good outweighs the bad: Days, energy, getting things done, lack of the fog funk, no guilt over crap in my lip, not worried about the next can, looking for the next thing to change in this life, the feeling of moving on to the next great adventure. "Thy loving kindness is everlasting."

Heading out to get a Christmas tree today. Feeling good. I had a great visit with my Physical Therapist yesterday. She has turned into almost a life coach. She literally exploded when I told her I was 11 days quit. The most animated I had seen her. "That is HUGE!", she said. She started in on all I had to look forward to as the nicotine leaves and the healing begins. Most encouraging. She was impressed as I shared what KTC is and does, she especially liked WUPP. We talked at length about lifestyle changes and habits. She chronicled all of my physical changes since I started with her. The take away was how much I take progress for granted, almost greedily grasping for that next hurdle without taking into account and being grateful for what has been accomplished.

I came to KTC because I could not do it on my own. I feel I was led here, as I was praying for grace and giving it to God (surrender) because I couldn't do it. A websearch later...now 12 days quit and looking at the next hurdle. I am grateful for the quit. I am just beginning to glimpse what I have sacrificed for years to the nicotine gods. The First Commandment, "Thou shalt have no other gods before Me, thou shalt not bow down to them nor worship them..." . I can easily and definitely place the driven worship of tobacco/nicotine and the "religious" habit within those words. I never realized it. Insidious. Nothing got in the way of my habit, I Always made sure I had chew, no matter what. Were I so diligent to other things in my life.

So now I am seeking and rooting out the other "gods". What else have I allowed to creep in and take me away from that which is important? Andycan talks about the exponential changes that accompanied his quit. I see it too.

As always, these are my thoughts and what works for me. PTQWYT
Olcpo - out
Micah 6:8
"Dying is easy, It's Living that's tough".
"Caving is easy, It's Quitting that is Tough"

Offline RockyMtnRunner

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Re: Day one
« Reply #28 on: December 06, 2019, 11:13:10 AM »
My appetite has been strong as well.  Been downing lots of ice cream.

I've also been using sunflower seeds and those lifesaver mints. 


Offline olcpo

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Re: Day one
« Reply #27 on: December 06, 2019, 09:59:37 AM »
Day 11 - Feeling good quit wise. Felt all good yesterday and over did the work-on-garage stuff, very sore and achy today. Headed into Town again today. I think I am past the rage thing, we will see. I will have to stop and apologize to the girls in the pasture for yelling at them, cows have feelings too.

Biggest thing right now is getting my appetite figured out. Before, chew and coffee killed off the appetite so I could go most of the day without food. Almost had an upset stomach all the time as I gutted the stuff. Now the appetite has come back with a fury. +10lbs in as many days. I am a "If a little is good, More is better" person. Never get full can always shove more in... The chew is gone. Not an option or in the picture at all. Moved on. @AndyCan  talked of holistic change over your whole being from good choices as a result of the quit. My interaction with food is the next focus. Holidays and a wife that is an amazing cook will be the excuses. The nic quit is absolute, no quarter. Food not so much, still have to interact with it. ODAAT, OMAAT(minute and meal)
More water.  'Nuff said Olcpo - out
Micah 6:8
"Dying is easy, It's Living that's tough".
"Caving is easy, It's Quitting that is Tough"

Offline RockyMtnRunner

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Re: Day one
« Reply #26 on: December 05, 2019, 01:02:39 PM »
Day 10 - Double digits WooHoo! I feel good this morning! Almost human like. Yesterday wasn't this good, but the Vets picked me up kicked me in the ass, got me moving. I did my workout, got all sweaty, went for a long walk, actually got some honey-doos knocked out. Thanks Guys!

I got to see the wrath of KTC on those that choose to cave. Wow! Really impressed with the fervor and intensity used to get the person right, humbled, responsible and back on track. Genuine concern and a definite line to meet the standard of Quit. Three questions, WUPP.

I kept thinking of John 8: 1-11, all through this story the woman was facing death by stoning. "Let he who is without sin, cast the first stone." "Where are those that condemn you? All left. Neither do I condemn you, Go and sin no more." Her heart had to be right for her to be given another chance. I saw that in the process yesterday. Answer the three questions, accept responsibility, fix what broke, learn from it, move on.

Another thought that came home to roost was "Reap what you Sow". And "There but for the grace of God go I".

So ODAAT! Workout today, walk, get the ceiling started in the garage, (flying solo with sheets of plywood should be a ride)

I did not do the fake chew yesterday, seemed to help. What is it about a little round can with leaves and stems in it that causes my mouth to water? I hate it when an inanimate object gets the best of me...  Olcpo- out

Congratulations on the double digits olcpo!  You sound in great spirits.  Keep it up!  PTQWYT

Offline AndyCan

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Re: Day one
« Reply #25 on: December 05, 2019, 12:08:49 PM »
Day 10 - Double digits WooHoo! I feel good this morning! Almost human like. Yesterday wasn't this good, but the Vets picked me up kicked me in the ass, got me moving. I did my workout, got all sweaty, went for a long walk, actually got some honey-doos knocked out. Thanks Guys!

I got to see the wrath of KTC on those that choose to cave. Wow! Really impressed with the fervor and intensity used to get the person right, humbled, responsible and back on track. Genuine concern and a definite line to meet the standard of Quit. Three questions, WUPP.

I kept thinking of John 8: 1-11, all through this story the woman was facing death by stoning. "Let he who is without sin, cast the first stone." "Where are those that condemn you? All left. Neither do I condemn you, Go and sin no more." Her heart had to be right for her to be given another chance. I saw that in the process yesterday. Answer the three questions, accept responsibility, fix what broke, learn from it, move on.

Another thought that came home to roost was "Reap what you Sow". And "There but for the grace of God go I".

So ODAAT! Workout today, walk, get the ceiling started in the garage, (flying solo with sheets of plywood should be a ride)

I did not do the fake chew yesterday, seemed to help. What is it about a little round can with leaves and stems in it that causes my mouth to water? I hate it when an inanimate object gets the best of me...  Olcpo- out

Congrats on double digits!  Keeping busy and active like you’re doing is one of the best things you can do early on.  And hopefully it will become habit forming and will continue to help you in the weeks, months and years to come.  I would just add to also try and take in loads of water if you aren’t already, to help flush out all of those toxins. 

I tell people that ask about my quit that my life changed exponentially after I quit dipping.  It doesn’t happen overnight, it happens after days and weeks and months of a growing, holistic change to your overall well-being.  So many good decisions and good choices seem to  result directly or indirectly from your option to quit each day.  In that process, which is inevitably a struggle at times, you grow, improve and strengthen mentally, physically, and spiritually. 

Keep it up!  PTQWYT

Offline olcpo

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Re: Day one
« Reply #24 on: December 05, 2019, 10:02:02 AM »
Day 10 - Double digits WooHoo! I feel good this morning! Almost human like. Yesterday wasn't this good, but the Vets picked me up kicked me in the ass, got me moving. I did my workout, got all sweaty, went for a long walk, actually got some honey-doos knocked out. Thanks Guys!

I got to see the wrath of KTC on those that choose to cave. Wow! Really impressed with the fervor and intensity used to get the person right, humbled, responsible and back on track. Genuine concern and a definite line to meet the standard of Quit. Three questions, WUPP.

I kept thinking of John 8: 1-11, all through this story the woman was facing death by stoning. "Let he who is without sin, cast the first stone." "Where are those that condemn you? All left. Neither do I condemn you, Go and sin no more." Her heart had to be right for her to be given another chance. I saw that in the process yesterday. Answer the three questions, accept responsibility, fix what broke, learn from it, move on.

Another thought that came home to roost was "Reap what you Sow". And "There but for the grace of God go I".

So ODAAT! Workout today, walk, get the ceiling started in the garage, (flying solo with sheets of plywood should be a ride)

I did not do the fake chew yesterday, seemed to help. What is it about a little round can with leaves and stems in it that causes my mouth to water? I hate it when an inanimate object gets the best of me...  Olcpo- out
Micah 6:8
"Dying is easy, It's Living that's tough".
"Caving is easy, It's Quitting that is Tough"

Offline olcpo

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Re: Day one
« Reply #23 on: December 04, 2019, 11:14:35 AM »
@SixString Thanks Six, Your wise words come at a great time. Gotta crawl outta this funk and move. Thanks Man I appreciate Ya'
« Last Edit: December 04, 2019, 11:17:44 AM by olcpo »
Micah 6:8
"Dying is easy, It's Living that's tough".
"Caving is easy, It's Quitting that is Tough"

Offline SixString

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Re: Day one
« Reply #22 on: December 04, 2019, 10:19:30 AM »
Day 9 - One minute at a time. Can't tell if I am fighting off a bug of some sort or if the Nic demons are tormenting me. Afternoons and evenings seem to be the toughest, ragged out tired anything seems to be construed as stressful. Gaining weight 8 pounds in a week. Need to make better choices as to how I spend my time. Too much sitting and thinking. Yesterday was more being less doing, today find the happy medium between the two. Yesterday I noticed I was craving the fake pouch. I wouldn't let myself have one. No more anything because I crave it, I need to add food to that list. What a mess...OMAAT
Olcpo-out

@olcpo I'm a big person on the one second at a time concept. Day 9 I hated life and stuffed my face with all the food I can get."Too much sitting and thinking" you got to try to avoid that. Even if it's going for a walk go find something to do. Distractions can be your best friend. They have been for me especially at day 9. It's going to suck my man but you are doing everything right for it to one day not suck. You are kicking ass proud to quit with you today. Feel free to PM me if you ever need to talk.

Offline olcpo

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Re: Day one
« Reply #21 on: December 04, 2019, 10:08:19 AM »
Day 9 - One minute at a time. Can't tell if I am fighting off a bug of some sort or if the Nic demons are tormenting me. Afternoons and evenings seem to be the toughest, ragged out tired anything seems to be construed as stressful. Gaining weight 8 pounds in a week. Need to make better choices as to how I spend my time. Too much sitting and thinking. Yesterday was more being less doing, today find the happy medium between the two. Yesterday I noticed I was craving the fake pouch. I wouldn't let myself have one. No more anything because I crave it, I need to add food to that list. What a mess...OMAAT
Olcpo-out
Micah 6:8
"Dying is easy, It's Living that's tough".
"Caving is easy, It's Quitting that is Tough"

Offline Nomore1959

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Re: Day one
« Reply #20 on: December 03, 2019, 06:58:13 PM »
Day 8 pt 2 - Back from town. I think I can be taught and am learning. Spotted 3 instances where it (anger) was coming on and stomped it before it could get away. All traffic no big deal stuff, but it felt good to stifle it. I am well aware I did this to myself, hence the big focus to not be anything negative to anyone else. I appreciate common thread of do something productive with the anger, so I'm walking and yelling at cows

I also cut my coffee in half this morning. I think it helped. I am having a cup this afternoon, but not stacking it all in the a.m.. A pharmacist friend recommended it, said without the nicotine there the effects of the caffeine would/could be amplified same with sugar. So giving it a try.

I appreciate all the responses, means the world and really helps.

That is strong quit at work!   If you run out of cows to yell at, my neighbor has a bunch of them.   8)

Offline olcpo

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Re: Day one
« Reply #19 on: December 03, 2019, 04:07:36 PM »
Day 8 pt 2 - Back from town. I think I can be taught and am learning. Spotted 3 instances where it (anger) was coming on and stomped it before it could get away. All traffic no big deal stuff, but it felt good to stifle it. I am well aware I did this to myself, hence the big focus to not be anything negative to anyone else. I appreciate common thread of do something productive with the anger, so I'm walking and yelling at cows

I also cut my coffee in half this morning. I think it helped. I am having a cup this afternoon, but not stacking it all in the a.m.. A pharmacist friend recommended it, said without the nicotine there the effects of the caffeine would/could be amplified same with sugar. So giving it a try.

I appreciate all the responses, means the world and really helps.
Micah 6:8
"Dying is easy, It's Living that's tough".
"Caving is easy, It's Quitting that is Tough"

Offline olcpo

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Re: Day one
« Reply #18 on: December 03, 2019, 09:57:33 AM »
Day 8 - A new Day. Going back to the city, gotta beat the rage. This whole thing is about not letting something from outside control or overshadow whats inside. Choice. Every time I am on the other side looking back regretting an action, there was a choice that I made. My regret comes from having to deal with the consequences of that CHOICE that I made. Make the right choice, no regrets. Sounds easy, but...

Today more Being Less doing. I am going to observe my reactions before they become action, try to figure out how to get the jump on the undesirable reaction that I will regret. Prayer. Grace.

Heading for town...
Micah 6:8
"Dying is easy, It's Living that's tough".
"Caving is easy, It's Quitting that is Tough"

Offline Keith0617

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Re: Day one
« Reply #17 on: December 03, 2019, 09:17:24 AM »
Day 7 Dreamed about chew last night, trouble going back to sleep. Glad it was only a dream. Headed into the big city today, dreading the icy roads and traffic. I would rather stay under my rock up here on the mountain side. Life goes on in spite of us. Grateful for another day. Grace. Looking for the good in all things, seems a little foggy at the moment. Endeavor to persevere. Got to get moving. olcpo-out

So went to the big city 60 miles of freeway to a town of 80k from a town of 800. Might as well be nyc or some other big city, all of the traffic crap and jerks. Going into town 4 lane bumper to bumper, icy, sitting through two lights to get through an intersection and some clown cuts me off, slam on the breaks, I am ready for battle. Wound tight, horn honkin' bird flyin', hit the gas ride his ass. Red hot steaming, on fire (I think they call it rage). He turns off, wife mentions we are late for her appointment...Woke up outta my trance...where did that come from? Wife a little bug eyed. I was in it before I knew it, wife says something about how its been 30 years since she has seen me act like that...An hour later, sitting in walmart parking lot reading a book, car pulls in next to me, WHAM, sob opens his door and hits my truck hard enough to rock it. Here we go again, book flies across the cab, I'm yelling, he's apologizing back-pedaling, "I've gotta bad hip..." I'm all over that, "I've gotta bad knee does that give me the right to kick the shit out of your car door?" Young kid gets out of driver side, "ain't his car" that snapped me out of it. My hands go up "I'm Sorry" Feeling foolish get back in the truck and read book. Must have got it outta my system, the rest of the day went well.

Not happy at all with my performance. First trip to the big city without my drugs in my lip, what a ride. Feel like I have to learn all over again after crawling out of the stupor of nicotine. I hope the mellow/civility returns soon, before I justifiably get my ass kicked for being a jerk. I do not like this waking up in a rage stuff. I have yet to pick up a cue that its coming on. I will pay attention as tomorrow I have to go back in for my dr. stuff. We will see if the old fool can be taught. Any suggestions from the vets of this war?

Give it time. You body/brain is doing a lot of relearning. But it will learn. Just give it time.
Jan19