Author Topic: Oldschool introduction  (Read 5911 times)

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Offline oldschool

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #52 on: April 11, 2020, 11:46:47 PM »
552 Days Nicotine Free!

It has been a rough bit of time for me lately.  Much Like in December, where waves of anxiety have almost crippled me.  Why?  Interestingly, the same circumstances have befallen me... the trials and tribulations of leadership become too powerful for my feeble brain to comprehend.   I accept this.  I have tried to overcome this, but to no avail, this is my new normal.  It is a small price to pay.  Hours, days, weeks of fighting to be normal, for months of freedom without tribulation.  I cannot complain.... 30+ years of addiction... it will not abide because I will it.... 30+ years of addiction might not ever be forgotten...30+ years of addiction has a price to pay.

Stay strong.  It is the only thing that has gotten me this far. 

Stay positive.  It is all that we have to keep moving forward.

Stay vigilant.  Complacency is what kills most quits.
The only time you fail, is if you don't try

Offline Keith0617

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #51 on: March 07, 2020, 04:58:12 PM »
517 Days Nicotine Free!

Dropping like flies.... Quite a few quitters leaving KTC recently.  I, too, have pondered that question:  When do I stop posting my daily promise?

What pisses me off, quite frankly, are the quitters who "forget" to post roll. The quitters who post roll late.  The quitters who post and ghost and don't help with accountability.  The quitters who just care about themselves.  The quitters who get mad when they get called out.  The quitters who signed up to be apart of this community yet do everything possible to not take part in what makes this quitting process work.  It is demoralizing to me.  If you don't want to be in KTC, why are you here screwing with other people's quit?  Why can't you just post your promise as early in the day possible so other quitters don't have to waste there time tracking you down?

My wife and I had a date night last night.  Conversation turned to how well I have been managing my withdrawal symptoms.  We talked about how this site has helped me, and how I have tried (in my small way) to pay it forward.  We even talked about when will I not need to do this anymore.  The answer to that question, for me, is I do not know when I will stop posting.  I can't think that far into the future.  I can't let my addict mind try to convince me that I am cured.  Even though I feel so much better and don't think about nicotine all that much anymore, I know that I still do think about it - especially when i don't expect it.  I know that even though my withdrawal symptoms are not as intense they are still there, lurking, in the shadows.  I think that is the problem for me; I know how easy it would be for me to start using again.  Yes, I hate nicotine to my core.  Yes, I hate the process of dipping - the spit, the mess, the stink, the everything.  Despite all of the hate, I know there is a chance that I could be weak enough, stupid enough, or desperate enough to use nicotine again.

So, I posted my promise today as soon as I woke up.  The plan is to post tomorrow.  I haven't really thought much farther than that.

oldschool
Still quit.  Still free.

Hell yeah..... you get it brother, proud to be free with you today!

Well said Rich. Couldn’t have said it better.
Jan19

Offline Zeus

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #50 on: March 07, 2020, 11:42:32 AM »
Rhetorical question, I know, but here we go: Why stop doing something that has been so beneficial to you?
If you're overweight and out of shape and go from a life-threatening 350 lbs to a strapping, healthy 160 lbs because you worked your ass off and practiced good food discipline, would you say it's time to stop counting calories and quit working out? No, you gotta keep at it or you end up where you were.

You may have simply reached a temporary comfortable plateau. One thing l learned while quitting is that nothing lasts forever. Quitting dip requires us to always be growing, or we end up back to where we were. So keep at it and keep growing and enjoy the privilege of being able to post another quit day. Good or bad, today is all we really have.

June 2017 Quit Mafia

Offline Skolvikings

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #49 on: March 07, 2020, 11:42:00 AM »
517 Days Nicotine Free!

Dropping like flies.... Quite a few quitters leaving KTC recently.  I, too, have pondered that question:  When do I stop posting my daily promise?

What pisses me off, quite frankly, are the quitters who "forget" to post roll. The quitters who post roll late.  The quitters who post and ghost and don't help with accountability.  The quitters who just care about themselves.  The quitters who get mad when they get called out.  The quitters who signed up to be apart of this community yet do everything possible to not take part in what makes this quitting process work.  It is demoralizing to me.  If you don't want to be in KTC, why are you here screwing with other people's quit?  Why can't you just post your promise as early in the day possible so other quitters don't have to waste there time tracking you down?

My wife and I had a date night last night.  Conversation turned to how well I have been managing my withdrawal symptoms.  We talked about how this site has helped me, and how I have tried (in my small way) to pay it forward.  We even talked about when will I not need to do this anymore.  The answer to that question, for me, is I do not know when I will stop posting.  I can't think that far into the future.  I can't let my addict mind try to convince me that I am cured.  Even though I feel so much better and don't think about nicotine all that much anymore, I know that I still do think about it - especially when i don't expect it.  I know that even though my withdrawal symptoms are not as intense they are still there, lurking, in the shadows.  I think that is the problem for me; I know how easy it would be for me to start using again.  Yes, I hate nicotine to my core.  Yes, I hate the process of dipping - the spit, the mess, the stink, the everything.  Despite all of the hate, I know there is a chance that I could be weak enough, stupid enough, or desperate enough to use nicotine again.

So, I posted my promise today as soon as I woke up.  The plan is to post tomorrow.  I haven't really thought much farther than that.

oldschool
Still quit.  Still free.

Hell yeah..... you get it brother, proud to be free with you today!
Be humble... grow everyday.

I fear I will always be chasing the vortex like a drug. None will be as special as my first hit.

MY HOF SPEECH

Offline oldschool

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #48 on: March 07, 2020, 10:35:49 AM »
517 Days Nicotine Free!

Dropping like flies.... Quite a few quitters leaving KTC recently.  I, too, have pondered that question:  When do I stop posting my daily promise?

What pisses me off, quite frankly, are the quitters who "forget" to post roll. The quitters who post roll late.  The quitters who post and ghost and don't help with accountability.  The quitters who just care about themselves.  The quitters who get mad when they get called out.  The quitters who signed up to be apart of this community yet do everything possible to not take part in what makes this quitting process work.  It is demoralizing to me.  If you don't want to be in KTC, why are you here screwing with other people's quit?  Why can't you just post your promise as early in the day possible so other quitters don't have to waste there time tracking you down?

My wife and I had a date night last night.  Conversation turned to how well I have been managing my withdrawal symptoms.  We talked about how this site has helped me, and how I have tried (in my small way) to pay it forward.  We even talked about when will I not need to do this anymore.  The answer to that question, for me, is I do not know when I will stop posting.  I can't think that far into the future.  I can't let my addict mind try to convince me that I am cured.  Even though I feel so much better and don't think about nicotine all that much anymore, I know that I still do think about it - especially when i don't expect it.  I know that even though my withdrawal symptoms are not as intense they are still there, lurking, in the shadows.  I think that is the problem for me; I know how easy it would be for me to start using again.  Yes, I hate nicotine to my core.  Yes, I hate the process of dipping - the spit, the mess, the stink, the everything.  Despite all of the hate, I know there is a chance that I could be weak enough, stupid enough, or desperate enough to use nicotine again.

So, I posted my promise today as soon as I woke up.  The plan is to post tomorrow.  I haven't really thought much farther than that.

oldschool
Still quit.  Still free.



The only time you fail, is if you don't try

Offline Sand44

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #47 on: January 30, 2020, 08:38:29 PM »
480 Days Nicotine Free!


Still not really "feeling it".  Press on.

Maybe winter blues?  Move forward.

Feeling the effects of no sugar sweets since 2019?  Yes.  Deal with it.

One good thing I was able to do:  I encouraged and motivated a co-worker to quit nicotine.  This person waffled for so long and was so afraid of quitting that I thought she would back out.  I finally asked her would she rather have withdrawal symptoms and cravings every hour?  Or, would she rather feel like shit for a short time and start the road to being a healthier person?  She finally took the plunge, and it was interesting to see her go through the withdrawal stages.  Her first week was tough, but her excitement and good planning got her through.  This week is her third week, and like me, this has been a rough week for her.  She realized that she was not dealing with people that well, and came and talked to me about how to power through.  One day she asked if she could go home because she just couldn't deal with anything.  Of course, I said yes.  I am lucky that I am in a leadership position where I can shape a positive culture at work where work life balance is a value.  I wish my boss would have been there for me and more understanding during my difficult times last year....

I am definitely a work in progress.  I still have to figure out how to reduce stress.  I appreciate the people who are patient with me.

Still quit.  Still Free.

You rock Rich. Keep kicking ass and leading the way.
This right here ^^^ keep doing what you're doing. It continues to get better. Stay strong stay quit brother
Badass! Get her on roll!

Hard to believe we’re coming up on 500 days...couldn’t of done it without you Rich! What a rollercoaster..  roflmao

Offline 69franx

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #46 on: January 30, 2020, 04:49:37 PM »
480 Days Nicotine Free!


Still not really "feeling it".  Press on.

Maybe winter blues?  Move forward.

Feeling the effects of no sugar sweets since 2019?  Yes.  Deal with it.

One good thing I was able to do:  I encouraged and motivated a co-worker to quit nicotine.  This person waffled for so long and was so afraid of quitting that I thought she would back out.  I finally asked her would she rather have withdrawal symptoms and cravings every hour?  Or, would she rather feel like shit for a short time and start the road to being a healthier person?  She finally took the plunge, and it was interesting to see her go through the withdrawal stages.  Her first week was tough, but her excitement and good planning got her through.  This week is her third week, and like me, this has been a rough week for her.  She realized that she was not dealing with people that well, and came and talked to me about how to power through.  One day she asked if she could go home because she just couldn't deal with anything.  Of course, I said yes.  I am lucky that I am in a leadership position where I can shape a positive culture at work where work life balance is a value.  I wish my boss would have been there for me and more understanding during my difficult times last year....

I am definitely a work in progress.  I still have to figure out how to reduce stress.  I appreciate the people who are patient with me.

Still quit.  Still Free.

You rock Rich. Keep kicking ass and leading the way.
This right here ^^^ keep doing what you're doing. It continues to get better. Stay strong stay quit brother
ABQ= Always Be Quitting

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HOF: 11/08/17     2nd Floor: 02/16/18     3rd Floor: 05/27/18     1st trip around the sun: 07/31/18     4th Floor: 09/04/18     5th floor: 12/13/18     6th floor: 03/23/2019     7th floor: 07/01/19     2nd trip around the sun: 07/31/19     8th floor: 10/09/19     9th floor: 01/17/20     Comma Day: 04/26/2020     3rd trip around the sun: 08/01/2020     11th floor: 08/04/2020     12th Floor: 11/12/2020     13th floor: 02/20/2021

Offline Keith0617

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #45 on: January 30, 2020, 01:58:42 PM »
480 Days Nicotine Free!


Still not really "feeling it".  Press on.

Maybe winter blues?  Move forward.

Feeling the effects of no sugar sweets since 2019?  Yes.  Deal with it.

One good thing I was able to do:  I encouraged and motivated a co-worker to quit nicotine.  This person waffled for so long and was so afraid of quitting that I thought she would back out.  I finally asked her would she rather have withdrawal symptoms and cravings every hour?  Or, would she rather feel like shit for a short time and start the road to being a healthier person?  She finally took the plunge, and it was interesting to see her go through the withdrawal stages.  Her first week was tough, but her excitement and good planning got her through.  This week is her third week, and like me, this has been a rough week for her.  She realized that she was not dealing with people that well, and came and talked to me about how to power through.  One day she asked if she could go home because she just couldn't deal with anything.  Of course, I said yes.  I am lucky that I am in a leadership position where I can shape a positive culture at work where work life balance is a value.  I wish my boss would have been there for me and more understanding during my difficult times last year....

I am definitely a work in progress.  I still have to figure out how to reduce stress.  I appreciate the people who are patient with me.

Still quit.  Still Free.

You rock Rich. Keep kicking ass and leading the way.
Jan19

Offline oldschool

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #44 on: January 30, 2020, 11:23:29 AM »
480 Days Nicotine Free!


Still not really "feeling it".  Press on.

Maybe winter blues?  Move forward.

Feeling the effects of no sugar sweets since 2019?  Yes.  Deal with it.

One good thing I was able to do:  I encouraged and motivated a co-worker to quit nicotine.  This person waffled for so long and was so afraid of quitting that I thought she would back out.  I finally asked her would she rather have withdrawal symptoms and cravings every hour?  Or, would she rather feel like shit for a short time and start the road to being a healthier person?  She finally took the plunge, and it was interesting to see her go through the withdrawal stages.  Her first week was tough, but her excitement and good planning got her through.  This week is her third week, and like me, this has been a rough week for her.  She realized that she was not dealing with people that well, and came and talked to me about how to power through.  One day she asked if she could go home because she just couldn't deal with anything.  Of course, I said yes.  I am lucky that I am in a leadership position where I can shape a positive culture at work where work life balance is a value.  I wish my boss would have been there for me and more understanding during my difficult times last year....

I am definitely a work in progress.  I still have to figure out how to reduce stress.  I appreciate the people who are patient with me.

Still quit.  Still Free.
The only time you fail, is if you don't try

Offline oldschool

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #43 on: January 11, 2020, 09:34:04 AM »
460 Days Nicotine Free!

I do cherish my quit.  I give my promise everyday that i will remain quit.  The freedom I now experience is because i am quit.  why do I feel so.....meh?

I have been working on family/work/quit life balance, but I haven't found that secret sauce yet.  I think it may be more than that.  Do I make a difference?  Am I adding value?  Where should I put effort in my life?  Am I just burned out?

Not a great blog today...sorry about that.  Still quit.  Still Free.
@oldschool
Feel you brother. I just came out the other side of where you are and you will to. Take a break, rest up, and you will be kicking ass before you know it.

thanks Keith - you have always been there for me - appreciate, man.
The only time you fail, is if you don't try

Offline oldschool

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #42 on: January 11, 2020, 09:31:45 AM »
460 Days Nicotine Free!

I do cherish my quit.  I give my promise everyday that i will remain quit.  The freedom I now experience is because i am quit.  why do I feel so.....meh?

I have been working on family/work/quit life balance, but I haven't found that secret sauce yet.  I think it may be more than that.  Do I make a difference?  Am I adding value?  Where should I put effort in my life?  Am I just burned out?

Not a great blog today...sorry about that.  Still quit.  Still Free.
@oldschool
Feel you brother. I just came out the other side of where you are and you will to. Take a break, rest up, and you will be kicking ass before you know it.
For me personally, YES! You’ve both made a HUGE difference. Though I’m not always the best at putting my appreciation into words, I am forever grateful for your time spent being present, giving encouragement, saving me and many others!
thank You @ankape !  I needed that encouragement right now....
The only time you fail, is if you don't try

Offline ankape

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #41 on: January 10, 2020, 05:00:17 PM »
460 Days Nicotine Free!

I do cherish my quit.  I give my promise everyday that i will remain quit.  The freedom I now experience is because i am quit.  why do I feel so.....meh?

I have been working on family/work/quit life balance, but I haven't found that secret sauce yet.  I think it may be more than that.  Do I make a difference?  Am I adding value?  Where should I put effort in my life?  Am I just burned out?

Not a great blog today...sorry about that.  Still quit.  Still Free.
@oldschool
Feel you brother. I just came out the other side of where you are and you will to. Take a break, rest up, and you will be kicking ass before you know it.
For me personally, YES! You’ve both made a HUGE difference. Though I’m not always the best at putting my appreciation into words, I am forever grateful for your time spent being present, giving encouragement, saving me and many others!

Offline Keith0617

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #40 on: January 10, 2020, 04:37:28 PM »
460 Days Nicotine Free!

I do cherish my quit.  I give my promise everyday that i will remain quit.  The freedom I now experience is because i am quit.  why do I feel so.....meh?

I have been working on family/work/quit life balance, but I haven't found that secret sauce yet.  I think it may be more than that.  Do I make a difference?  Am I adding value?  Where should I put effort in my life?  Am I just burned out?

Not a great blog today...sorry about that.  Still quit.  Still Free.
@oldschool
Feel you brother. I just came out the other side of where you are and you will to. Take a break, rest up, and you will be kicking ass before you know it.
Jan19

Offline oldschool

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #39 on: January 10, 2020, 03:30:45 PM »
460 Days Nicotine Free!

I do cherish my quit.  I give my promise everyday that i will remain quit.  The freedom I now experience is because i am quit.  why do I feel so.....meh?

I have been working on family/work/quit life balance, but I haven't found that secret sauce yet.  I think it may be more than that.  Do I make a difference?  Am I adding value?  Where should I put effort in my life?  Am I just burned out?

Not a great blog today...sorry about that.  Still quit.  Still Free.



The only time you fail, is if you don't try

Offline Ruthless

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Re: Oldschool introduction
« Reply #38 on: December 23, 2019, 12:49:12 PM »
440 Days Nicotine Free!

My dear old friend anxiety came back and hung out with me for awhile.  Some friends knock on the door quietly before they come in, but not my friend anxiety.  Oh no!  My friend anxiety knocks so hard the door flies off the hinges hitting me hard, like a freight train hard, square onto my head, back, and shoulders.  I must say with friends like anxiety, I don't have the want or need of any enemies.  I was trying to figure out why anxiety decided to visit as it hasn't come in quite awhile.  I voiced my concerns to my loving (and smarter than me) wife, and she quickly commented:  "Sheesh!  You have had a lot of stressful things happen the last couple of weeks. The big Customer visit with all the VP's and Sales people there.  The injury at work and all of the investigations, conference calls.  Thanksgiving and Christmas preparations.  You did so much!"  She was right - as always.  I was handling the stress until my brain couldn't handle it anymore and then it popped.  My dear friend anxiety decided to visit to let me know that I had to take it easy.  My dear friend anxiety let me know that I needed to learn how to get rid of  stress instead of collecting it and letting it weigh down my brain.  Oh, my dear friend anxiety you do have a painful way of teaching me lessons.

I had a dip dream this morning.  It was a short, relatively disgusting, half asleep half awake kind of dip dream.  Simply stated; I saw myself digging my fingers into an almost empty can of dip. Feverishly trying to get every bit of it onto my fingers so I could shove it into my mouth.  You know the kind of digging, scraping for dip that stains your fingers?  The kind of pinching that leaves tobacco all of your teeth?  The pit of your stomach feeling that you have no more dip and have to buy a can feeling?  Yes, I was disgusted when I had this dream, and thankful and blessed that I have not had this experience in 440 days.  Freedom!

Only the strong can quit.  There is strength in numbers.  Be strong with me.
Thanks for sharing this Rich. I have never struggled with anxiety historically until this past summer. Had one episode of racing heart in June which set off full blown anxiety despite passing an echocardiogram with flying colors. From then on, any ache or pain or slight feeling of discomfort has me feeling like I'm going to die. Add two small kiddos into the equation and the thought of anything happening to me increases the anxiety level. Deep down I know I am healthy and nothing is wrong but the irrational fears linger.

I'm glad to know I'm not in this additional fight alone. I know I need to find ways to stress less. I struggle with OCD and am an intense clean freak. I definitely need to find ways to manage my OCD/stress in a healthy way. ODAAT

Again, thanks for sharing. Damn proud to be quit with you today!
Wow, I could have easily written the exact same response as MNx...I mean exact same!  Anxiety is a fickle beast best handled like quitting; ODAAT.  Proud to quit with you Rich; and I enjoy the daily promises!
Remember, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.  If you fail, learn why you failed and try something different!

My HoF Speech