KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: per034 on April 27, 2011, 04:32:00 PM
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Just starting this process. 2 days in. Been dipping Copenhagen over a can-a-day for over 25 years.
I've tried to quit before, never with much success.
I have no idea how far I'll make it. Just want to make it to tomorrow.
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Just starting this process. 2 days in. Been dipping Copenhagen over a can-a-day for over 25 years.
I've tried to quit before, never with much success.
I have no idea how far I'll make it. Just want to make it to tomorrow.
Go to your group (August 2011) and post roll each morning. Start now with today as Day 2.
index.php?showtopic=4651 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4651)
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Yeah I'm in there. Number 8. Been on this site for hours today...
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Welcome. Check your (Inbox 1) upper right corner of your screen.
You can do this.
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you worry about making it until tomorrow, then when tomorrow becomes today, worry about tomorrow again...that's all you need to worry about!
you can do it, shout if you need anything, or just if you want to shout
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Just starting this process. 2 days in. Been dipping Copenhagen over a can-a-day for over 25 years.
I've tried to quit before, never with much success.
I have no idea how far I'll make it. Just want to make it to tomorrow.
Tell you what...just make it till tonight. Go to bed...and then worry about tomorrow. There are times you will need to worry about th next 5 minutes...worry about them and then take what comes next. I dipped Cope, at least a can a day for more tahn 30 years. You can do this...I'm 800 days in today, but I still remember what you're going through now. YOU CAN do this. PM me if you need anything
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per-Welcome! I'm 13 days in. Honored to be Quit with you. My first few days I lived on this site. That's what it took to Quit so that's what I did. Post Roll Call and keep your word. It makes all the difference. Let me know if I can help. Today I posted Roll Call and today I am Quit. Peace
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Just starting this process. 2 days in. Been dipping Copenhagen over a can-a-day for over 25 years.
I've tried to quit before, never with much success.
I have no idea how far I'll make it. Just want to make it to tomorrow.
Tried? Tried?
As Yoda once said..."Do or do not. There is no try."
You have to make up your mind, and commit completely to your quit. Leave no option on the table other than to quit. Get mad dog mean and gut it out.
Thus endeth the lesson.
ps - welcome aboard, and congrats on your decision to take back your life.
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good to see the support. thanks all for taking the time to post on my "introduction."
yoda was a short, ancient, fat, green, midget-dwarf from a make-believe time and place.
i'm no jedi.
i'll keep trying. everyday.
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good to see the support. thanks all for taking the time to post on my "introduction."
yoda was a short, ancient, fat, green, midget-dwarf from a make-believe time and place.
i'm no jedi.
i'll keep trying. everyday.
You posted roll. There is no "trying" today. You gave us all your word. If you're a man of your word, you won't be using nicotine today. It's just that simple. When you get a crave, just say "not today, I gave my word." Then get up tomorrow and post roll first thing.
If you worry about quitting for forever, it will only make things harder. The nic bitch goes on a rampage when you tell her y'all are done for good. Just tell her you're quit for today and focus minute by minute if you have to. Forever will work itself out if you post roll first thing every morning.
I read where you've been on this site for hours today. Good. I've never heard of anyone caving because they spent too much time here.
Good to be quit with you. Give a shout if there's anything we can do.
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Day four fucking blows. :angry:
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Day four fucking blows. :angry:
Indeed.
Day 1184 is simply unbelievable.
You can do this.
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Day four fucking blows. :angry:
Yes it does. Nicotine is evil is it not? Remember this moment. Never again for any reason. Never again.
You can do it.
Oh, by the way, I see you posted roll at 12:05 am. You gave us a full 23 hours and 55 min of quit today. Well done!
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Four days nic free is huge...Congrats. Now, you're just fighting the mental game. You versus the nic bitch? Nope. You AND US against the nic bitch. You can do this...and we're here to support you every fucking step of the way.
Don't think about tomorrow, next month, next year or forever. We'll worry about those when they get here. Just focus on right now...this five minutes...today. Anyone can quit for one day, right? Just post roll, keep your word, and repeat.
Read all you can on this site. You can do this, bro. Embrace the suck...that's your body healing.
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Keep it brother. I PM'ed you my cell number. If you need anything at all shoot me a text.
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Today is day 17. Feels like year 17. Feels like this shit is so far behind me now. I still get cravings for it. But very rarely. When the craving comes it's almost like they don't make tobacco anymore. My mindset becomes "yeah, that would be nice, but it's just not an option." And that's what it's become. A non-option.
I stopped into a quick-mart two days ago to get seeds. This was my place for cope in my past life. I didn't really think much of it when I went in to get seeds. Until I got to the counter and the guy had 2 cans of Cope in his hands and a smile on his face. I felt like I was looking at a drug dealer. "No thanks - been quit for two weeks now."
He stared at me in disbelief. Like "really? You were my best customer! I order an extra sleeve of Cope every week just for you!"
Too fricken bad. I'm done. No more. Feels good.
For any newbies who might be reading this - if you're on day 1. Or day 4. Or hour 3 - trust me, it gets better. I dipped for 25+ years. Every day. At least a can O'Cope a Day. I'm just taking this one day at a time. I posted roll today. I'm quit today. And when I post roll tomorrow, I'll be quit tomorrow.
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Per - you are doing great! - You inspire my quit and it is a privilege to be quit with you today - Corn
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Great post man. Thanks for the insight. As a day 5 guy here I'm just sick of the physical crap. Like you, it matters not because going and getting some tobacco just isn't an option, but still it sucks to go through.
I very much look forward to cravings being the most of my worries. Pretty sure I can handle that.
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The cravings aren't even cravings. They're just these little triggers in my life. Like just now I got a reminder to do my monthly status report. My reflex reaction was "ok, close the door, pop in a dip, and do the report." Then, less than a second later my reaction was "ah fuck. Dammit. Oh well."
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Today is day 17. Feels like year 17. Feels like this shit is so far behind me now. I still get cravings for it. But very rarely. When the craving comes it's almost like they don't make tobacco anymore. My mindset becomes "yeah, that would be nice, but it's just not an option." And that's what it's become. A non-option.
I stopped into a quick-mart two days ago to get seeds. This was my place for cope in my past life. I didn't really think much of it when I went in to get seeds. Until I got to the counter and the guy had 2 cans of Cope in his hands and a smile on his face. I felt like I was looking at a drug dealer. "No thanks - been quit for two weeks now."
He stared at me in disbelief. Like "really? You were my best customer! I order an extra sleeve of Cope every week just for you!"
Too fricken bad. I'm done. No more. Feels good.
For any newbies who might be reading this - if you're on day 1. Or day 4. Or hour 3 - trust me, it gets better. I dipped for 25+ years. Every day. At least a can O'Cope a Day. I'm just taking this one day at a time. I posted roll today. I'm quit today. And when I post roll tomorrow, I'll be quit tomorrow.
Im in the same boat with you brother, I went into my spot picked up some spicy seeds and some more gum and went to the counter...clerk had my cope out as well and when I told her I was quit she could not fuckin believe it...I left and was so proud of myself because I feel that in that instance I just strengthened my quit even more than what it was before.
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Today is day 17. Feels like year 17. Feels like this shit is so far behind me now. I still get cravings for it. But very rarely. When the craving comes it's almost like they don't make tobacco anymore. My mindset becomes "yeah, that would be nice, but it's just not an option." And that's what it's become. A non-option.
I stopped into a quick-mart two days ago to get seeds. This was my place for cope in my past life. I didn't really think much of it when I went in to get seeds. Until I got to the counter and the guy had 2 cans of Cope in his hands and a smile on his face. I felt like I was looking at a drug dealer. "No thanks - been quit for two weeks now."
He stared at me in disbelief. Like "really? You were my best customer! I order an extra sleeve of Cope every week just for you!"
Too fricken bad. I'm done. No more. Feels good.
For any newbies who might be reading this - if you're on day 1. Or day 4. Or hour 3 - trust me, it gets better. I dipped for 25+ years. Every day. At least a can O'Cope a Day. I'm just taking this one day at a time. I posted roll today. I'm quit today. And when I post roll tomorrow, I'll be quit tomorrow.
Im in the same boat with you brother, I went into my spot picked up some spicy seeds and some more gum and went to the counter...clerk had my cope out as well and when I told her I was quit she could not fuckin believe it...I left and was so proud of myself because I feel that in that instance I just strengthened my quit even more than what it was before.
Please be very careful. It is awsome to be quit but don't get too cocky about it. Not to be the bearer of bad news but I felt exactly the same early on in my quit too. There may be some bad days ahead. It is important you remember how good you feel about being quit if those days come. The 50's were horrible for me. This site got me through.
Don't get me wrong. Enjoy the way you feel about your quit. I'm just saying the nic bitch is probably not done with you yet.
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Today is day 17. Feels like year 17. Feels like this shit is so far behind me now. I still get cravings for it. But very rarely. When the craving comes it's almost like they don't make tobacco anymore. My mindset becomes "yeah, that would be nice, but it's just not an option." And that's what it's become. A non-option.
I stopped into a quick-mart two days ago to get seeds. This was my place for cope in my past life. I didn't really think much of it when I went in to get seeds. Until I got to the counter and the guy had 2 cans of Cope in his hands and a smile on his face. I felt like I was looking at a drug dealer. "No thanks - been quit for two weeks now."
He stared at me in disbelief. Like "really? You were my best customer! I order an extra sleeve of Cope every week just for you!"
Too fricken bad. I'm done. No more. Feels good.
For any newbies who might be reading this - if you're on day 1. Or day 4. Or hour 3 - trust me, it gets better. I dipped for 25+ years. Every day. At least a can O'Cope a Day. I'm just taking this one day at a time. I posted roll today. I'm quit today. And when I post roll tomorrow, I'll be quit tomorrow.
Im in the same boat with you brother, I went into my spot picked up some spicy seeds and some more gum and went to the counter...clerk had my cope out as well and when I told her I was quit she could not fuckin believe it...I left and was so proud of myself because I feel that in that instance I just strengthened my quit even more than what it was before.
Please be very careful. It is awsome to be quit but don't get too cocky about it. Not to be the bearer of bad news but I felt exactly the same early on in my quit too. There may be some bad days ahead. It is important you remember how good you feel about being quit if those days come. The 50's were horrible for me. This site got me through.
Don't get me wrong. Enjoy the way you feel about your quit. I'm just saying the nic bitch is probably not done with you yet.
Ditto. I'm on day 65 so take this for what it's worth. Day 60 61 were this past weekend. I was in such a rage...somewhat due to job stress but I had a lot of outdoor projects and too much time to think about the bitch. Tuesday night driving 3 hours by myself presented too much boredom and think time again. I've made other long road trips since quit but this one was solo and too late in the night to kill time on a phone call. Fight the good fight. Gum, seeds, your lower lip...chew on anything but nicotine. Get up the next morning and post roll. Make this promise to yourself and us.
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Today is day 17. Feels like year 17. Feels like this shit is so far behind me now. I still get cravings for it. But very rarely. When the craving comes it's almost like they don't make tobacco anymore. My mindset becomes "yeah, that would be nice, but it's just not an option." And that's what it's become. A non-option.
I stopped into a quick-mart two days ago to get seeds. This was my place for cope in my past life. I didn't really think much of it when I went in to get seeds. Until I got to the counter and the guy had 2 cans of Cope in his hands and a smile on his face. I felt like I was looking at a drug dealer. "No thanks - been quit for two weeks now."
He stared at me in disbelief. Like "really? You were my best customer! I order an extra sleeve of Cope every week just for you!"
Too fricken bad. I'm done. No more. Feels good.
For any newbies who might be reading this - if you're on day 1. Or day 4. Or hour 3 - trust me, it gets better. I dipped for 25+ years. Every day. At least a can O'Cope a Day. I'm just taking this one day at a time. I posted roll today. I'm quit today. And when I post roll tomorrow, I'll be quit tomorrow.
Im in the same boat with you brother, I went into my spot picked up some spicy seeds and some more gum and went to the counter...clerk had my cope out as well and when I told her I was quit she could not fuckin believe it...I left and was so proud of myself because I feel that in that instance I just strengthened my quit even more than what it was before.
Please be very careful. It is awsome to be quit but don't get too cocky about it. Not to be the bearer of bad news but I felt exactly the same early on in my quit too. There may be some bad days ahead. It is important you remember how good you feel about being quit if those days come. The 50's were horrible for me. This site got me through.
Don't get me wrong. Enjoy the way you feel about your quit. I'm just saying the nic bitch is probably not done with you yet.
Ditto. I'm on day 65 so take this for what it's worth. Day 60 61 were this past weekend. I was in such a rage...somewhat due to job stress but I had a lot of outdoor projects and too much time to think about the bitch. Tuesday night driving 3 hours by myself presented too much boredom and think time again. I've made other long road trips since quit but this one was solo and too late in the night to kill time on a phone call. Fight the good fight. Gum, seeds, your lower lip...chew on anything but nicotine. Get up the next morning and post roll. Make this promise to yourself and us.
complacency is the quickest way to kill a quit. not trying to be a dick here per...but there is no way 'this shit is so far behind' you now. it's awesome you are experiencing great days . these days are what it is all about. don't forget these days. store them away in the back of your mind so when the periodic suck returns you can easily blow through it and push fwd to more good days.
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Today is day 17. Feels like year 17. Feels like this shit is so far behind me now. I still get cravings for it. But very rarely. When the craving comes it's almost like they don't make tobacco anymore. My mindset becomes "yeah, that would be nice, but it's just not an option." And that's what it's become. A non-option.
I stopped into a quick-mart two days ago to get seeds. This was my place for cope in my past life. I didn't really think much of it when I went in to get seeds. Until I got to the counter and the guy had 2 cans of Cope in his hands and a smile on his face. I felt like I was looking at a drug dealer. "No thanks - been quit for two weeks now."
He stared at me in disbelief. Like "really? You were my best customer! I order an extra sleeve of Cope every week just for you!"
Too fricken bad. I'm done. No more. Feels good.
For any newbies who might be reading this - if you're on day 1. Or day 4. Or hour 3 - trust me, it gets better. I dipped for 25+ years. Every day. At least a can O'Cope a Day. I'm just taking this one day at a time. I posted roll today. I'm quit today. And when I post roll tomorrow, I'll be quit tomorrow.
Im in the same boat with you brother, I went into my spot picked up some spicy seeds and some more gum and went to the counter...clerk had my cope out as well and when I told her I was quit she could not fuckin believe it...I left and was so proud of myself because I feel that in that instance I just strengthened my quit even more than what it was before.
Please be very careful. It is awsome to be quit but don't get too cocky about it. Not to be the bearer of bad news but I felt exactly the same early on in my quit too. There may be some bad days ahead. It is important you remember how good you feel about being quit if those days come. The 50's were horrible for me. This site got me through.
Don't get me wrong. Enjoy the way you feel about your quit. I'm just saying the nic bitch is probably not done with you yet.
Ditto. I'm on day 65 so take this for what it's worth. Day 60 61 were this past weekend. I was in such a rage...somewhat due to job stress but I had a lot of outdoor projects and too much time to think about the bitch. Tuesday night driving 3 hours by myself presented too much boredom and think time again. I've made other long road trips since quit but this one was solo and too late in the night to kill time on a phone call. Fight the good fight. Gum, seeds, your lower lip...chew on anything but nicotine. Get up the next morning and post roll. Make this promise to yourself and us.
Thanks for keeping me humble...I should have added though that on that day, I was having a bad day and in a good fog but because of this site, MY QUIT and the fact that I vowed not to dip that day...I never even considered buying a can an option. But I do thank you because I know I am nowhere out of the woods yet...I am still deep in the forest but every so often I can look up and see the bright sun through a clearing of the treetops. That is why I continue to post roll and follow in the footsteps that quit brothers like you have laid out for us. I am quit for today!!!
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there is no way 'this shit is so far behind' you now.
That's why I said "feels like" ... I know it ain't over. And I know I got a Looooooong road ahead of me. I'm sure that some time in 2032, when I'm hanging in the backyard with my grandkids, that nic bitch will be watching and waiting ... She might be far off in the distance, and she might be faded quite a bit, but she'll always be there. And I'll always give her the finger every morning and tell her to take a long hard suck on my brown starfish and leave me the hell alone... 'arse'
But right now, I feel pretty damn good.
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there is no way 'this shit is so far behind' you now.
That's why I said "feels like" ... I know it ain't over. And I know I got a Looooooong road ahead of me. I'm sure that some time in 2032, when I'm hanging in the backyard with my grandkids, that nic bitch will be watching and waiting ... She might be far off in the distance, and she might be faded quite a bit, but she'll always be there. And I'll always give her the finger every morning and tell her to take a long hard suck on my brown starfish and leave me the hell alone... 'arse'
But right now, I feel pretty damn good.
How bout you just focus on staying quit today. You don't have to worry about 2032 or day 100 or even tomorrow.
All you gotta do is just keep your promise for today. Tomorrow will take care of itself.
Skoal Monster
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Just picked up my beer bottle with about 4 oz left in it and did a reflexive double take. Wait, is this a spittoon or a beer? Oh that's right, I have no need to fear that anymore.
It's nice picking up a bottle or can and not having to fear the warm chunky reality of drinking a spittoon.
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I'm at 39 days today. I'm here every day. It's just part of my life now. Like having a cup of coffee or putting on new underwear every day (ok, maybe not everyday :)).
When I started this journey I didn't know what to expect. Frankly, I didn't even know if I wanted to quit. My quit started almost on accident - which is a quick way to a failed quit. But I haven't failed and I won't fail. Becuase of this site, every day my quit gets stronger. In the beginning, I spent an obscene amount of time on this site, just reading. Seeing unbelievable support from people who had no clue who I was and seeing astonishing anger directed at people who failed at their quit. I was (and still am) incredibly grateful for the former, and was (but am no longer) incredibly disheartened by the latter.
I went back to my first post in the August Quit Group today and starting reading forward. At one point I came across one of my own posts on Day 3 which included something along the lines of "maybe in a week I'll regret posting this"... The whole thing was about the anger directed at failed quitters.
Well, it's over a month later. I don't regret posting what I had written so early on, because those comments were just another part of my journey to where I am today. But I no longer feel the same way. I understand the anger directed at the failed quit of others. It has nothing to do with the failed quit. It has everything to do with a broken promise. I didn't realize that in the beginning. Some random stranger wants to give in to the nicotine addiction, well too bad for them - I'm not involved. But that same random stranger makes a promise to me and breaks it? Well fuck you then, because now I am involved.
I think that's a defining reason why this site works for so many people. It works for the people who take pride in their own personal character and integrity. It works for people who realize that a promise made is a promise kept. I have no idea if others on this site share the same opinion or if I'm just way the hell out in left field... but it doesn't really matter all that much. This is what I believe this site means for ME and MY QUIT, so this is what I will continue to believe.
And that's why I come here everyday. Like a cup of coffee and fresh pair of skivvies. Because I know I won't break my promise - my promise is stronger than my addiction.
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I'm at 39 days today. I'm here every day. It's just part of my life now. Like having a cup of coffee or putting on new underwear every day (ok, maybe not everyday :)).
When I started this journey I didn't know what to expect. Frankly, I didn't even know if I wanted to quit. My quit started almost on accident - which is a quick way to a failed quit. But I haven't failed and I won't fail. Becuase of this site, every day my quit gets stronger. In the beginning, I spent an obscene amount of time on this site, just reading. Seeing unbelievable support from people who had no clue who I was and seeing astonishing anger directed at people who failed at their quit. I was (and still am) incredibly grateful for the former, and was (but am no longer) incredibly disheartened by the latter.
I went back to my first post in the August Quit Group today and starting reading forward. At one point I came across one of my own posts on Day 3 which included something along the lines of "maybe in a week I'll regret posting this"... The whole thing was about the anger directed at failed quitters.
Well, it's over a month later. I don't regret posting what I had written so early on, because those comments were just another part of my journey to where I am today. But I no longer feel the same way. I understand the anger directed at the failed quit of others. It has nothing to do with the failed quit. It has everything to do with a broken promise. I didn't realize that in the beginning. Some random stranger wants to give in to the nicotine addiction, well too bad for them - I'm not involved. But that same random stranger makes a promise to me and breaks it? Well fuck you then, because now I am involved.
I think that's a defining reason why this site works for so many people. It works for the people who take pride in their own personal character and integrity. It works for people who realize that a promise made is a promise kept. I have no idea if others on this site share the same opinion or if I'm just way the hell out in left field... but it doesn't really matter all that much. This is what I believe this site means for ME and MY QUIT, so this is what I will continue to believe.
And that's why I come here everyday. Like a cup of coffee and fresh pair of skivvies. Because I know I won't break my promise - my promise is stronger than my addiction.
Damn straight Per. The people who are serious about their quit recognize the importance of posting roll and the accountability associated with that act.
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Just between you and me there are parts of me that still don't wanna quit and I'm a couple months ahead of you. Don't get me wrong the vast majority of my fiber hates dip and what I allowed it to become in my life, but I'm an addict always hoping for my next fix until I die.
Thankfully I have folks like you I've given my word to today that I won't use.
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And that's why I come here everyday. Like a cup of coffee and fresh pair of skivvies.
Well La ti da Mr. fancy pants you get a fresh pair of skivvies...Arent you special.................Per you got it man...Your head is on straight and your journey is going to be long but still wouldnt trade my or your journey for all the virgins in the world....Keep it up.......Hmmm well maybe the really hot looking ones....Oh never mind...Never trading my journey....YOU THE MAN!
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Nice work per. Always good to read insight from fellow members ahead of me in the process.
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Skivvies.....that just makes me giggle.
Good stuff per, proud to quit with you today!
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I'm at 39 days today. I'm here every day. It's just part of my life now. Like having a cup of coffee or putting on new underwear every day (ok, maybe not everyday :)).
When I started this journey I didn't know what to expect. Frankly, I didn't even know if I wanted to quit. My quit started almost on accident - which is a quick way to a failed quit. But I haven't failed and I won't fail. Becuase of this site, every day my quit gets stronger. In the beginning, I spent an obscene amount of time on this site, just reading. Seeing unbelievable support from people who had no clue who I was and seeing astonishing anger directed at people who failed at their quit. I was (and still am) incredibly grateful for the former, and was (but am no longer) incredibly disheartened by the latter.
I went back to my first post in the August Quit Group today and starting reading forward. At one point I came across one of my own posts on Day 3 which included something along the lines of "maybe in a week I'll regret posting this"... The whole thing was about the anger directed at failed quitters.
Well, it's over a month later. I don't regret posting what I had written so early on, because those comments were just another part of my journey to where I am today. But I no longer feel the same way. I understand the anger directed at the failed quit of others. It has nothing to do with the failed quit. It has everything to do with a broken promise. I didn't realize that in the beginning. Some random stranger wants to give in to the nicotine addiction, well too bad for them - I'm not involved. But that same random stranger makes a promise to me and breaks it? Well fuck you then, because now I am involved.
I think that's a defining reason why this site works for so many people. It works for the people who take pride in their own personal character and integrity. It works for people who realize that a promise made is a promise kept. I have no idea if others on this site share the same opinion or if I'm just way the hell out in left field... but it doesn't really matter all that much. This is what I believe this site means for ME and MY QUIT, so this is what I will continue to believe.
And that's why I come here everyday. Like a cup of coffee and fresh pair of skivvies. Because I know I won't break my promise - my promise is stronger than my addiction.
Gets me all Giddy when someone finally has that light above their head go off with the intensity of a thousand spotlights.
Enjoy your freedom, you are earning it every day.
P.S. You have no idea how great things will get. It gets way better.
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I'm at 39 days today. I'm here every day. It's just part of my life now. Like having a cup of coffee or putting on new underwear every day (ok, maybe not everyday :)).
When I started this journey I didn't know what to expect. Frankly, I didn't even know if I wanted to quit. My quit started almost on accident - which is a quick way to a failed quit. But I haven't failed and I won't fail. Becuase of this site, every day my quit gets stronger. In the beginning, I spent an obscene amount of time on this site, just reading. Seeing unbelievable support from people who had no clue who I was and seeing astonishing anger directed at people who failed at their quit. I was (and still am) incredibly grateful for the former, and was (but am no longer) incredibly disheartened by the latter.
I went back to my first post in the August Quit Group today and starting reading forward. At one point I came across one of my own posts on Day 3 which included something along the lines of "maybe in a week I'll regret posting this"... The whole thing was about the anger directed at failed quitters.
Well, it's over a month later. I don't regret posting what I had written so early on, because those comments were just another part of my journey to where I am today. But I no longer feel the same way. I understand the anger directed at the failed quit of others. It has nothing to do with the failed quit. It has everything to do with a broken promise. I didn't realize that in the beginning. Some random stranger wants to give in to the nicotine addiction, well too bad for them - I'm not involved. But that same random stranger makes a promise to me and breaks it? Well fuck you then, because now I am involved.
I think that's a defining reason why this site works for so many people. It works for the people who take pride in their own personal character and integrity. It works for people who realize that a promise made is a promise kept. I have no idea if others on this site share the same opinion or if I'm just way the hell out in left field... but it doesn't really matter all that much. This is what I believe this site means for ME and MY QUIT, so this is what I will continue to believe.
And that's why I come here everyday. Like a cup of coffee and fresh pair of skivvies. Because I know I won't break my promise - my promise is stronger than my addiction.
Preach on, brother per, preach on!
When I've told my dipping friends that it was an online forum that got me over the hump, they think I'm crazy. Giving my word, especially to others going through the same shit, and keeping it means everything to me.
Excellent post, per. Proud to be quit with you, and thank you for making my quit stronger!
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Day 52. I'm taken back to basketball practice in high school.
End of practice. We all line up on the base line. coach says "everyone hits ten from the foul line and we can all go home".
There are 12 of us. 10 of us hit ten pretty easily. Some go 10 for 10.. most 10 for 13 or 14... the other two, not so much. they suck. They're tyring, but God didn't bless them. we're all standing on the baseline waiting for them to hit their fould shots.
But that's alright because they're at the end of the bench and they're supposed to suck. And we're teammates. We're all rooting for them. We're all trying to help them learn how to shoot better. We're 16, 17 year old kids who get it and are trying to help the guys who suck to get better.
Now it's June 15, 2011. 22 years later. End of the day. We're all lined up in roll call ... except for a few guys... not so much. They suck at roll. And we're all standing there waiting for them to post roll.
And that's not alright. Becuase NOBODY in my quit group is at the end of the bench. We're all starters. You don't get to collect the trophy if your quit sucks. I'm sorry - this isn't high school basketball. And, oh yeah - I'm not 17 anymore. And neither are you. Take the skirt off. If you can't post roll EVERY FUCKING DAY THEN GET OUT OF MY FUCKIN QUIT GROUP!
Sorry - just getting pissed now. I found someone today who went 11 days between posts. I wish I had the power to kick them out.
In high school basketball, you could suck - but you had to try. Some of these motherfuckers here don't try.
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I know your pain, per. We want to see everyone succeed. We help in any way that is within our power. But ultimately they have to take ownership of their quit. They have to close the door. It says volumes about their quit if they are not willing to spend 5 minutes posting roll.
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I am 6 minutes away from the end of day 56. At least that's what time it is as I'm writing. I'm sure by the time I hit "post reply" it'll be time for my Day 57 promise.
Today was not easy. I'm in Boston right now for work sitting in my hotel room. Took a train from Penn Station 4 hours up here. No dip. Who cares, right? It's been EIGHT FUCKING WEEKS ASS-MUNCH! YOU DON'T DIP ANYMORE.
Oh but I do. In the back of my mind I still dip.
I don't know why today was so tough. I played golf on Thursday for the first time without dip and it wasn't too tough. Seeds... beer... an historical amount of triple bogeys.. but I wasn't craving. Played again on father's day... never really thought about dip. Lots of seeds. But no dip. I didn't even think about it.
Today was not easy though. At 6:50 pm I found myself walking around Woburn Massachusettes looking for a Seven Eleven. I wanted a dip. I rationalized for 30 minutes that I could get a tin, dip while away for work, and then throw it away when I get home. I was 100% convinced that I would break my promise today and for 30 minutes I was 100% ok with that. I didn't find a seven eleven. I found a BP. I walked up to the counter and saw 31 flavors of dip behind Apu. I opened my mouth and paused.. actually paused like this was some bullshit sitcom or something... and asked for a can of Smokey Mountain. They didn't carry. Got two bags of seed and a bag of funyons. As I was walking back to my hotel I though I would have a feeling of pride because I held strong. Because I didn't give in to the cravings.
I was ashamed. I was embarrassed. I was disgusted with myself because those 30 minutes when I was convinced I was going to break my promise was almost as bad as breaking my promise.
I'm now starting day 57. The cravings don't get easier. They get harder - they just come and go a lot less often. I don't care what day you're posting today.As soon as you think "I got this" you'll find yourself a day closer to "Day 1."
-
I am 6 minutes away from the end of day 56. At least that's what time it is as I'm writing. I'm sure by the time I hit "post reply" it'll be time for my Day 57 promise.
Today was not easy. I'm in Boston right now for work sitting in my hotel room. Took a train from Penn Station 4 hours up here. No dip. Who cares, right? It's been EIGHT FUCKING WEEKS ASS-MUNCH! YOU DON'T DIP ANYMORE.
Oh but I do. In the back of my mind I still dip.
I don't know why today was so tough. I played golf on Thursday for the first time without dip and it wasn't too tough. Seeds... beer... an historical amount of triple bogeys.. but I wasn't craving. Played again on father's day... never really thought about dip. Lots of seeds. But no dip. I didn't even think about it.
Today was not easy though. At 6:50 pm I found myself walking around Woburn Massachusettes looking for a Seven Eleven. I wanted a dip. I rationalized for 30 minutes that I could get a tin, dip while away for work, and then throw it away when I get home. I was 100% convinced that I would break my promise today and for 30 minutes I was 100% ok with that. I didn't find a seven eleven. I found a BP. I walked up to the counter and saw 31 flavors of dip behind Apu. I opened my mouth and paused.. actually paused like this was some bullshit sitcom or something... and asked for a can of Smokey Mountain. They didn't carry. Got two bags of seed and a bag of funyons. As I was walking back to my hotel I though I would have a feeling of pride because I held strong. Because I didn't give in to the cravings.
I was ashamed. I was embarrassed. I was disgusted with myself because those 30 minutes when I was convinced I was going to break my promise was almost as bad as breaking my promise.
I'm now starting day 57. The cravings don't get easier. They get harder - they just come and go a lot less often. I don't care what day you're posting today.As soon as you think "I got this" you'll find yourself a day closer to "Day 1."
Glad to hear you made it (and I'm glad to see you work through this on your intro page). That said, please see your day 39 post and ruminate on that promise before you ever get to a point where you are OK breaking it (you should be on the phone getting permission to cave before you ever get into a store). It's a testament to how strong this addiction is that you can "get it" and still get to that point. That's why many of us are such hardasses here. You just can't leave the slightest crack open or your addicted mind will try to take over.
Way to stay strong in the end, and thanks for sharing the story. That said, the cravings DO get easier. They're like a gnat to me at day 450 and they are far between. That said, I never assume I won't get a crushing one at any time. That's why I post roll every day and know how to deal with it when it comes.
It helped me to focus on not putting a day to when it would get "better." Just keep putting one proverbial foot in front of the other, come what may, and one day you'll turn around and look back and realize that it hasn't been too hard for a while.
Just keep on quitting, bro. It is WELL worth it, no matter how your addict mind tries to convince you otherwise.
-
I am 6 minutes away from the end of day 56. At least that's what time it is as I'm writing. I'm sure by the time I hit "post reply" it'll be time for my Day 57 promise.
Today was not easy. I'm in Boston right now for work sitting in my hotel room. Took a train from Penn Station 4 hours up here. No dip. Who cares, right? It's been EIGHT FUCKING WEEKS ASS-MUNCH! YOU DON'T DIP ANYMORE.
Oh but I do. In the back of my mind I still dip.
I don't know why today was so tough. I played golf on Thursday for the first time without dip and it wasn't too tough. Seeds... beer... an historical amount of triple bogeys.. but I wasn't craving. Played again on father's day... never really thought about dip. Lots of seeds. But no dip. I didn't even think about it.
Today was not easy though. At 6:50 pm I found myself walking around Woburn Massachusettes looking for a Seven Eleven. I wanted a dip. I rationalized for 30 minutes that I could get a tin, dip while away for work, and then throw it away when I get home. I was 100% convinced that I would break my promise today and for 30 minutes I was 100% ok with that. I didn't find a seven eleven. I found a BP. I walked up to the counter and saw 31 flavors of dip behind Apu. I opened my mouth and paused.. actually paused like this was some bullshit sitcom or something... and asked for a can of Smokey Mountain. They didn't carry. Got two bags of seed and a bag of funyons. As I was walking back to my hotel I though I would have a feeling of pride because I held strong. Because I didn't give in to the cravings.
I was ashamed. I was embarrassed. I was disgusted with myself because those 30 minutes when I was convinced I was going to break my promise was almost as bad as breaking my promise.
I'm now starting day 57. The cravings don't get easier. They get harder - they just come and go a lot less often. I don't care what day you're posting today.As soon as you think "I got this" you'll find yourself a day closer to "Day 1."
Funny - when you're committed to keeping your word, thinking "I'm going to break my promise" means just about as much as an active chewer saying "I'm going to quit tomorrow."
Our actions are all that matter in the end. You owned that shit.
-
Our actions are all that matter in the end.
I was scared today. downright fucking terrified. When I walked away eating nasty-ass funyons I was terrified that it got that close. Tomorrow will be a better day. My promise is in.
-
Our actions are all that matter in the end.
I was scared today. downright fucking terrified. When I walked away eating nasty-ass funyons I was terrified that it got that close. Tomorrow will be a better day. My promise is in.
Tomorrow may be worse. You'll still be quit.
-
Our actions are all that matter in the end.
I was scared today. downright fucking terrified. When I walked away eating nasty-ass funyons I was terrified that it got that close. Tomorrow will be a better day. My promise is in.
Tomorrow may be worse. You'll still be quit.
70's funk is all, just a bit early, one day at a time buddy. You DO got this and it will get easier i promise. Read up on the funk
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Our actions are all that matter in the end.
I was scared today. downright fucking terrified. When I walked away eating nasty-ass funyons I was terrified that it got that close. Tomorrow will be a better day. My promise is in.
Tomorrow may be worse. You'll still be quit.
70's funk is all, just a bit early, one day at a time buddy. You DO got this and it will get easier i promise. Read up on the funk
Victory. Cherish it. You have gotten through the toughest part. Now, the nic bitch has to use different warfare. Sneaky, sneaky stuff now. She seldom fights. Little 30 minute battles with your mind...every so often. There to test your resolve and find weakness. Hone your craft on these types of battles. Victory. Cherish it.
-
I was ashamed. I was embarrassed. I was disgusted with myself because those 30 minutes when I was convinced I was going to break my promise was almost as bad as breaking my promise.
...but you didn't! I'm proud of you! PM me if you need a distraction. We can always talk about the Mets till the storm passes.
Don't struggle alone...proud to be quit with you today!
-
Per, way to get through it. You are definitely one of the people I absolutely KNOW I am going to see in roll everyday. Would have been real tough if we lost ya. Glad to be quit with you.
-
I am 6 minutes away from the end of day 56. At least that's what time it is as I'm writing. I'm sure by the time I hit "post reply" it'll be time for my Day 57 promise.
Today was not easy. I'm in Boston right now for work sitting in my hotel room. Took a train from Penn Station 4 hours up here. No dip. Who cares, right? It's been EIGHT FUCKING WEEKS ASS-MUNCH! YOU DON'T DIP ANYMORE.
Oh but I do. In the back of my mind I still dip.
I don't know why today was so tough. I played golf on Thursday for the first time without dip and it wasn't too tough. Seeds... beer... an historical amount of triple bogeys.. but I wasn't craving. Played again on father's day... never really thought about dip. Lots of seeds. But no dip. I didn't even think about it.
Today was not easy though. At 6:50 pm I found myself walking around Woburn Massachusettes looking for a Seven Eleven. I wanted a dip. I rationalized for 30 minutes that I could get a tin, dip while away for work, and then throw it away when I get home. I was 100% convinced that I would break my promise today and for 30 minutes I was 100% ok with that. I didn't find a seven eleven. I found a BP. I walked up to the counter and saw 31 flavors of dip behind Apu. I opened my mouth and paused.. actually paused like this was some bullshit sitcom or something... and asked for a can of Smokey Mountain. They didn't carry. Got two bags of seed and a bag of funyons. As I was walking back to my hotel I though I would have a feeling of pride because I held strong. Because I didn't give in to the cravings.
I was ashamed. I was embarrassed. I was disgusted with myself because those 30 minutes when I was convinced I was going to break my promise was almost as bad as breaking my promise.
I'm now starting day 57. The cravings don't get easier. They get harder - they just come and go a lot less often. I don't care what day you're posting today.As soon as you think "I got this" you'll find yourself a day closer to "Day 1."
Per. You rule. No shame or embarrassment here at all. Just victory. I had a similar experience. 25 year dipper. 26 days in now. Days 1-10 were easy. The suck? Easy. It was over Memorial Day weekend, by design. I mostly dipped at the office, so that explained it. First day back at the office? Harder. Trigger-fest. But I was mentally prepared for this. Days 9-10 were the weekend. Easiest 2 days of my quit up till that point. Started getting confident. I've got this quit. What is all of the fuss about? If I have survived a week of work and home doing normal shit without too much pain, I will be quit no problem. Then came Day 11. Holy shit. I got hit out of no where. Nic was all over my ass. Started the first thing when I walked into my office. All I could think about was having a dip. Nic telling me she's my friend and wants me back. Even worse, Nic hitting me with my number one fear: How can you succeed at work without me? The only reason you are able to do what you do is because of me. Dude, I spend the first 2 hours staring at my computer. Went on a walk. Thought about going to the convenience store. Trust me. Nic was pushing me hard to go there. Telling me. Dude, you've got a lot of work today. Just one will be fine. I'll leave you alone after that, and you'll get your work done. Got on Live Chat. Closed the door and meditated. Nothing. Finally at around 2, I just got up and left. Drove home. Left the torture chamber. For a brief moment I was ashamed. Nic caused me to puss out and leave work with a shitload of deadlines and annoyed clients. Maybe at first one might think Nic got the best of me. But No. I got Nic. Why? BECAUSE I DID NOT CAVE. That is all Nic wants. For you to puss out, go back to your old ways and CAVE. I did not Cave. I did whatever it took. Left my job. At the end of the day, I won the day. I beat Nic. She launched a major assault my way and I pushed her back. Days 12-25 have been like the first 10. I suspect right now that Nic is planning a new assault. I'll be ready. And Per, so will you. You won your day in Woburn, and you will continue to win.
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Nice job per. For my first couple of months I dreamed of the one night stand I'd have with dip again at some point in the future--I'm gonna give it to the nic bitch doggy style all night! Saying "Hey we'll catch up later" was enough to keep me from using most days. There was St Patricks day about as far in for me as you are now where the only thing that kept me from buying a tin for a quickie was my promise. You kept your promise.
Proud to be quit with you
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Per034 - day 58. I feel much better when I quit this early. Quit with Dante and the Mets pitching staff.
You are awesome...made me laugh out loud at my desk. Guess I was so tired when I posted this morning that I missed this.
-
Thought it would be a good idea to keep this alive and well here. I may have knocked some of my fellow Quitheads off on accident... please check.
Get-to-know-a-brotha
Listen up my Augustonians! You've got a brother at Half-a-HOF now so I think we are a little overdue for our formal introductions; Example:
FunnyLatino
Name: FunnyLatino
Day Job: Deputy Sheriff
Age: 35
Sports: Football, anything from Colorado... Love CU Buffs.
For Fun: Performing standup comedy, DJ music at weddings, parties, etc.. eating good mexican food...
Addiction Summary: Chewed since May 4, 1998, skoal mint, about a can every two days towards the end.
Cancrusher
Name: Austin
Age: 24
Day Job: Admissions Counselor
Sports: Not really much of a sports follower. Enjoy going to Reds games and watching college football basketball.
For fun: I love grilling out on my Weber, tossin' back a few cold ones, playing my guitars (I have way more than anyone should; My USA Fender Strat is my baby), messing with the general public in any way I can, watching classic movies, and ummm....QUITTING!
Addiction Summary: chewed / smoked from the age of 14 - 23. Quit on May 15, 2010 (394 Days ago). Now enjoying every moment of life to the fullest!
Edromero
Name: Ed Romero
Age: 36
Day Job: Cremation Oven Salesman
Sports: only watch motorcycle racing or fishing
For fun: lift weights, running, swimming, motorcycling, tugging my peg.
Addiction Summary: tobacco in any form 13-36.
gmann
Name: gmann
Age: 36
Day Job: Lawya
Sports: I only watch college football (Georgia is my favorite team and should be yours, too) and the Masters tournament. Everything else is gay.
For fun: I play golf and slay ducks.
Addiction Summary: Skoal Straight/15 years.
wardamneagle1979
Name: Andrew
Age:32
Day Job: Teacher/Coach
Sports: Auburn Football, Braves, Saints..pretty big sports junkie (would bet good $$ that I'm the only person in South Alabama that watched and loved game 7 of the stanley cup last night)
For fun: I fish a lot, spend q.t. with my family, watch sports, and love dogs
Addiction Summary: Skoal Mint for a solid 11 years
kmarren
name: Kevin
age: 42
Occupation: Data Storge Sales
Sports: only watch boxing.
Fun: Music, playing guitar, singing, family, running and quiting!
Addition Summary: Smoked age 15-20 Skoal in any flavor age 20-42
marjwilliams
Name: Marcus
Age: 31
Day Job: fluffer err uh... Banker
Sports: Texas Tech, Mavericks, Rangers, Golf when Tiger's good.
For fun: golf, guns, day drinking, bowling, books, interwebs, evening drinking, fishing
Addiction: 12 years, can-a-day Skoal Straight and Timberwolf straight longcut.
maverick
Name: Mark
Age: 46
Day Job: Field ops
Sports: KC Chiefs
For Fun: Fishing, Cycling, Running, beer drinking, (then more running)
Addiction: Skoal Wintergreen Fine Cut - same shit for 30 years
LLCope
Name: Lance
Age: 39
Day Job: Marketing Manager
Sports: Love Baseball
For Fun: I Run 5k's, 10k's, and my first half and full marathon last year
Addiction: Cope Pouches--straight
jmag
Name: Jason
Age: 33
Day Job: Winegrower
Sports: Seattle Mariners/Seahawks, WSU
For Fun: Fishing, Hunting
Addiction: Copenhagen- 15 years
parry8587
Name: Ian
Age: 23
Day Job: Studying for CPA exam
Sports: Love playing basketball and golf, enjoy watching college basektball/football, nba, golf, and some baseball (Mets)
For Fun: golf, summer league basketball, learning how to invest
Addiction: Grizzly Wintergreen - 8 years
BTM99
Name: Brant
Age: 36
Day Job: Manager of Mail Pharmacy Operations
Sports: STL Cardinals, Mizzou Football, STL Blues Hockey, Football in general and Golf
For Fun: Golf, Reading (into Leadership Development and Process Improvement)
Addiction: 20 years - Kodiak Wintergreen for 10 and Grizzly Wintergreen for 10
RebelDog
Name: Christian
Age: 39
Day Job: Vice President of Operations
Sports: New Orleans Saints, LSU Tigers and a casual Cubbies fan
For Fun: Coaching youth baseball, football camping, hunting, fishing, etc.
Addiction: 20 years - Skoal/RedSeal/Cope-Long Cut Wintergreen. Addict for life.
KilltheKodiak
Name: Mike
Age: 32
Day Job: Mechanical Technitian, Aerospace
Sports: LA Kings, SD Charges and a casual Padres fan
For Fun: BBQing, Water Sports, and punk/ska music
Addiction: 16 years -Kodiak wintergreen, all day -everyday!!
ruderunner
Name: Charlie
Age: 37
Day Job: Enforcement of THE LAW
Sports: Follow Phillies, Eagles and Flyers
For Fun: Coaching whatever the boys are playing. (baseball/hockey) Me: run, bike, swim.
Addiction: 19 years- kodiak, skoal, rooster, grizzly 1-1.5 a day depending on what I was doing. Basically if I wasnt eating or fucking, I was dipping....
dchogs
Name: Ben
Age: 35
Day Job: Director of Admissions @ boarding school
Sports: Redskins, Capitals
For Fun: Coaching the kids in soccer, basketball and swimming; swimming, running, mtn biking, fishing, reading for me time
Addiction: 14 yrs; 21-35. Started briefly with Kodiak, switched to Skoal Mint, switched to Grizz Mint about 2 yrs ago.
theNow
Name: Now (Aprill 2011 group)
Age: 34
Day Job: Legal drug dealer
Sports: Reds, a little NFL if I can't get out in the woods, fishing to pass time; everything pretty much takes a backseat to bowhunting Ohio whitetail (got me a new PSE Axe 6 last fall after 12 years with my original PSE...Love it!). Will also dabble with anything else that's in season in the Buckeye state.
For fun: my wife, son (4yrs), daughter (2 yrs), beer, guns, the farm, running, and scheming for the deer season in the offseason...
Addiction: because it was cool I began dabbling with any and all tobacco but mostly cigarettes around 15, took it up a notch when I started driving, another notch when I hit college, yet another notch when I left Ma and Pa and bought my first house after pharmacy school, and then I switched to a full-time dipper (a healthier alternative ya know...duh!) at 28 when I started a new addiction to running...Up to a can +/- of Grizz Wintergreen QD when I woke the fuck up and started to seriously search for help and try to understand why the fuck I was doing this and why the fuck I could't stop...enter ktc.org.
SayrahAnne
Name: Sarah
Age: 22
Day Job: Nanny/Maid/Student
Sports: I love football. College over Professional. GA Bulldogs!
For Fun: I love to sing, so I go to karaoke. I love music in general, and like to help write songs. I like to go to the bar with friends. If I find quiet time, I love to read.
Addiction: I started 5/19/2007. I quit 5/19/2011. 4 Years to the day. I'd dip whatever, but I mainly did skoal berry blend pouches. At least half a can a day, but sometimes more. PROUD TO BE QUIT!
DippinFool
Name: Francis
Age: 38
Day Job: Meteorologist
Sports: Golf mostly
For Fun: Enjoying taking my speedboat out on the water, always a good time. Deep sea fishing is also a hobby
Addiction: 22 years, pretty much anything i could get my hands on. mostly cope, also some skoal wintergreen
per034
Name: Pat
Age: 38
Day Job: Professional Liar (normally known as "Marketing")
Sports: Golf, Mets and Giants for teams
For Fun: Chillin with my Chillun.Competitive bagpiping. Hitting the sauce.
Addiction: 25+ years. Copenhagen. Can a Day. Proud to be quit of that shit.
-
Thought it would be a good idea to keep this alive and well here. I may have knocked some of my fellow Quitheads off on accident... please check.
Get-to-know-a-brotha
Listen up my Augustonians! You've got a brother at Half-a-HOF now so I think we are a little overdue for our formal introductions; Example:
FunnyLatino
Name: FunnyLatino
Day Job: Deputy Sheriff
Age: 35
Sports: Football, anything from Colorado... Love CU Buffs.
For Fun: Performing standup comedy, DJ music at weddings, parties, etc.. eating good mexican food...
Addiction Summary: Chewed since May 4, 1998, skoal mint, about a can every two days towards the end.
Cancrusher
Name: Austin
Age: 24
Day Job: Admissions Counselor
Sports: Not really much of a sports follower. Enjoy going to Reds games and watching college football basketball.
For fun: I love grilling out on my Weber, tossin' back a few cold ones, playing my guitars (I have way more than anyone should; My USA Fender Strat is my baby), messing with the general public in any way I can, watching classic movies, and ummm....QUITTING!
Addiction Summary: chewed / smoked from the age of 14 - 23. Quit on May 15, 2010 (394 Days ago). Now enjoying every moment of life to the fullest!
Edromero
Name: Ed Romero
Age: 36
Day Job: Cremation Oven Salesman
Sports: only watch motorcycle racing or fishing
For fun: lift weights, running, swimming, motorcycling, tugging my peg.
Addiction Summary: tobacco in any form 13-36.
gmann
Name: gmann
Age: 36
Day Job: Lawya
Sports: I only watch college football (Georgia is my favorite team and should be yours, too) and the Masters tournament. Everything else is gay.
For fun: I play golf and slay ducks.
Addiction Summary: Skoal Straight/15 years.
wardamneagle1979
Name: Andrew
Age:32
Day Job: Teacher/Coach
Sports: Auburn Football, Braves, Saints..pretty big sports junkie (would bet good $$ that I'm the only person in South Alabama that watched and loved game 7 of the stanley cup last night)
For fun: I fish a lot, spend q.t. with my family, watch sports, and love dogs
Addiction Summary: Skoal Mint for a solid 11 years
kmarren
name: Kevin
age: 42
Occupation: Data Storge Sales
Sports: only watch boxing.
Fun: Music, playing guitar, singing, family, running and quiting!
Addition Summary: Smoked age 15-20 Skoal in any flavor age 20-42
marjwilliams
Name: Marcus
Age: 31
Day Job: fluffer err uh... Banker
Sports: Texas Tech, Mavericks, Rangers, Golf when Tiger's good.
For fun: golf, guns, day drinking, bowling, books, interwebs, evening drinking, fishing
Addiction: 12 years, can-a-day Skoal Straight and Timberwolf straight longcut.
maverick
Name: Mark
Age: 46
Day Job: Field ops
Sports: KC Chiefs
For Fun: Fishing, Cycling, Running, beer drinking, (then more running)
Addiction: Skoal Wintergreen Fine Cut - same shit for 30 years
LLCope
Name: Lance
Age: 39
Day Job: Marketing Manager
Sports: Love Baseball
For Fun: I Run 5k's, 10k's, and my first half and full marathon last year
Addiction: Cope Pouches--straight
jmag
Name: Jason
Age: 33
Day Job: Winegrower
Sports: Seattle Mariners/Seahawks, WSU
For Fun: Fishing, Hunting
Addiction: Copenhagen- 15 years
parry8587
Name: Ian
Age: 23
Day Job: Studying for CPA exam
Sports: Love playing basketball and golf, enjoy watching college basektball/football, nba, golf, and some baseball (Mets)
For Fun: golf, summer league basketball, learning how to invest
Addiction: Grizzly Wintergreen - 8 years
BTM99
Name: Brant
Age: 36
Day Job: Manager of Mail Pharmacy Operations
Sports: STL Cardinals, Mizzou Football, STL Blues Hockey, Football in general and Golf
For Fun: Golf, Reading (into Leadership Development and Process Improvement)
Addiction: 20 years - Kodiak Wintergreen for 10 and Grizzly Wintergreen for 10
RebelDog
Name: Christian
Age: 39
Day Job: Vice President of Operations
Sports: New Orleans Saints, LSU Tigers and a casual Cubbies fan
For Fun: Coaching youth baseball, football camping, hunting, fishing, etc.
Addiction: 20 years - Skoal/RedSeal/Cope-Long Cut Wintergreen. Addict for life.
KilltheKodiak
Name: Mike
Age: 32
Day Job: Mechanical Technitian, Aerospace
Sports: LA Kings, SD Charges and a casual Padres fan
For Fun: BBQing, Water Sports, and punk/ska music
Addiction: 16 years -Kodiak wintergreen, all day -everyday!!
ruderunner
Name: Charlie
Age: 37
Day Job: Enforcement of THE LAW
Sports: Follow Phillies, Eagles and Flyers
For Fun: Coaching whatever the boys are playing. (baseball/hockey) Me: run, bike, swim.
Addiction: 19 years- kodiak, skoal, rooster, grizzly 1-1.5 a day depending on what I was doing. Basically if I wasnt eating or fucking, I was dipping....
dchogs
Name: Ben
Age: 35
Day Job: Director of Admissions @ boarding school
Sports: Redskins, Capitals
For Fun: Coaching the kids in soccer, basketball and swimming; swimming, running, mtn biking, fishing, reading for me time
Addiction: 14 yrs; 21-35. Started briefly with Kodiak, switched to Skoal Mint, switched to Grizz Mint about 2 yrs ago.
theNow
Name: Now (Aprill 2011 group)
Age: 34
Day Job: Legal drug dealer
Sports: Reds, a little NFL if I can't get out in the woods, fishing to pass time; everything pretty much takes a backseat to bowhunting Ohio whitetail (got me a new PSE Axe 6 last fall after 12 years with my original PSE...Love it!). Will also dabble with anything else that's in season in the Buckeye state.
For fun: my wife, son (4yrs), daughter (2 yrs), beer, guns, the farm, running, and scheming for the deer season in the offseason...
Addiction: because it was cool I began dabbling with any and all tobacco but mostly cigarettes around 15, took it up a notch when I started driving, another notch when I hit college, yet another notch when I left Ma and Pa and bought my first house after pharmacy school, and then I switched to a full-time dipper (a healthier alternative ya know...duh!) at 28 when I started a new addiction to running...Up to a can +/- of Grizz Wintergreen QD when I woke the fuck up and started to seriously search for help and try to understand why the fuck I was doing this and why the fuck I could't stop...enter ktc.org.
SayrahAnne
Name: Sarah
Age: 22
Day Job: Nanny/Maid/Student
Sports: I love football. College over Professional. GA Bulldogs!
For Fun: I love to sing, so I go to karaoke. I love music in general, and like to help write songs. I like to go to the bar with friends. If I find quiet time, I love to read.
Addiction: I started 5/19/2007. I quit 5/19/2011. 4 Years to the day. I'd dip whatever, but I mainly did skoal berry blend pouches. At least half a can a day, but sometimes more. PROUD TO BE QUIT!
DippinFool
Name: Francis
Age: 38
Day Job: Meteorologist
Sports: Golf mostly
For Fun: Enjoying taking my speedboat out on the water, always a good time. Deep sea fishing is also a hobby
Addiction: 22 years, pretty much anything i could get my hands on. mostly cope, also some skoal wintergreen
per034
Name: Pat
Age: 38
Day Job: Professional Liar (normally known as "Marketing")
Sports: Golf, Mets and Giants for teams
For Fun: Chillin with my Chillun.Competitive bagpiping. Hitting the sauce.
Addiction: 25+ years. Copenhagen. Can a Day. Proud to be quit of that shit.
Onelegrus
Name: Rusty
Age: 48
Day Job:Sales Consultant
Sports: Alabama Football, Braves. Hawks, Falcons
For Fun: League Pool, Hanging out with the wife, Fishing
Addiction:30+years, every type of nicotine product available, the last 10 years a can of Grizzley a day
-
Thought it would be a good idea to keep this alive and well here. I may have knocked some of my fellow Quitheads off on accident... please check.
Get-to-know-a-brotha
Listen up my Augustonians! You've got a brother at Half-a-HOF now so I think we are a little overdue for our formal introductions; Example:
FunnyLatino
Name: FunnyLatino
Day Job: Deputy Sheriff
Age: 35
Sports: Football, anything from Colorado... Love CU Buffs.
For Fun: Performing standup comedy, DJ music at weddings, parties, etc.. eating good mexican food...
Addiction Summary: Chewed since May 4, 1998, skoal mint, about a can every two days towards the end.
Cancrusher
Name: Austin
Age: 24
Day Job: Admissions Counselor
Sports: Not really much of a sports follower. Enjoy going to Reds games and watching college football basketball.
For fun: I love grilling out on my Weber, tossin' back a few cold ones, playing my guitars (I have way more than anyone should; My USA Fender Strat is my baby), messing with the general public in any way I can, watching classic movies, and ummm....QUITTING!
Addiction Summary: chewed / smoked from the age of 14 - 23. Quit on May 15, 2010 (394 Days ago). Now enjoying every moment of life to the fullest!
Edromero
Name: Ed Romero
Age: 36
Day Job: Cremation Oven Salesman
Sports: only watch motorcycle racing or fishing
For fun: lift weights, running, swimming, motorcycling, tugging my peg.
Addiction Summary: tobacco in any form 13-36.
gmann
Name: gmann
Age: 36
Day Job: Lawya
Sports: I only watch college football (Georgia is my favorite team and should be yours, too) and the Masters tournament. Everything else is gay.
For fun: I play golf and slay ducks.
Addiction Summary: Skoal Straight/15 years.
wardamneagle1979
Name: Andrew
Age:32
Day Job: Teacher/Coach
Sports: Auburn Football, Braves, Saints..pretty big sports junkie (would bet good $$ that I'm the only person in South Alabama that watched and loved game 7 of the stanley cup last night)
For fun: I fish a lot, spend q.t. with my family, watch sports, and love dogs
Addiction Summary: Skoal Mint for a solid 11 years
kmarren
name: Kevin
age: 42
Occupation: Data Storge Sales
Sports: only watch boxing.
Fun: Music, playing guitar, singing, family, running and quiting!
Addition Summary: Smoked age 15-20 Skoal in any flavor age 20-42
marjwilliams
Name: Marcus
Age: 31
Day Job: fluffer err uh... Banker
Sports: Texas Tech, Mavericks, Rangers, Golf when Tiger's good.
For fun: golf, guns, day drinking, bowling, books, interwebs, evening drinking, fishing
Addiction: 12 years, can-a-day Skoal Straight and Timberwolf straight longcut.
maverick
Name: Mark
Age: 46
Day Job: Field ops
Sports: KC Chiefs
For Fun: Fishing, Cycling, Running, beer drinking, (then more running)
Addiction: Skoal Wintergreen Fine Cut - same shit for 30 years
LLCope
Name: Lance
Age: 39
Day Job: Marketing Manager
Sports: Love Baseball
For Fun: I Run 5k's, 10k's, and my first half and full marathon last year
Addiction: Cope Pouches--straight
jmag
Name: Jason
Age: 33
Day Job: Winegrower
Sports: Seattle Mariners/Seahawks, WSU
For Fun: Fishing, Hunting
Addiction: Copenhagen- 15 years
parry8587
Name: Ian
Age: 23
Day Job: Studying for CPA exam
Sports: Love playing basketball and golf, enjoy watching college basektball/football, nba, golf, and some baseball (Mets)
For Fun: golf, summer league basketball, learning how to invest
Addiction: Grizzly Wintergreen - 8 years
BTM99
Name: Brant
Age: 36
Day Job: Manager of Mail Pharmacy Operations
Sports: STL Cardinals, Mizzou Football, STL Blues Hockey, Football in general and Golf
For Fun: Golf, Reading (into Leadership Development and Process Improvement)
Addiction: 20 years - Kodiak Wintergreen for 10 and Grizzly Wintergreen for 10
RebelDog
Name: Christian
Age: 39
Day Job: Vice President of Operations
Sports: New Orleans Saints, LSU Tigers and a casual Cubbies fan
For Fun: Coaching youth baseball, football camping, hunting, fishing, etc.
Addiction: 20 years - Skoal/RedSeal/Cope-Long Cut Wintergreen. Addict for life.
KilltheKodiak
Name: Mike
Age: 32
Day Job: Mechanical Technitian, Aerospace
Sports: LA Kings, SD Charges and a casual Padres fan
For Fun: BBQing, Water Sports, and punk/ska music
Addiction: 16 years -Kodiak wintergreen, all day -everyday!!
ruderunner
Name: Charlie
Age: 37
Day Job: Enforcement of THE LAW
Sports: Follow Phillies, Eagles and Flyers
For Fun: Coaching whatever the boys are playing. (baseball/hockey) Me: run, bike, swim.
Addiction: 19 years- kodiak, skoal, rooster, grizzly 1-1.5 a day depending on what I was doing. Basically if I wasnt eating or fucking, I was dipping....
dchogs
Name: Ben
Age: 35
Day Job: Director of Admissions @ boarding school
Sports: Redskins, Capitals
For Fun: Coaching the kids in soccer, basketball and swimming; swimming, running, mtn biking, fishing, reading for me time
Addiction: 14 yrs; 21-35. Started briefly with Kodiak, switched to Skoal Mint, switched to Grizz Mint about 2 yrs ago.
theNow
Name: Now (Aprill 2011 group)
Age: 34
Day Job: Legal drug dealer
Sports: Reds, a little NFL if I can't get out in the woods, fishing to pass time; everything pretty much takes a backseat to bowhunting Ohio whitetail (got me a new PSE Axe 6 last fall after 12 years with my original PSE...Love it!). Will also dabble with anything else that's in season in the Buckeye state.
For fun: my wife, son (4yrs), daughter (2 yrs), beer, guns, the farm, running, and scheming for the deer season in the offseason...
Addiction: because it was cool I began dabbling with any and all tobacco but mostly cigarettes around 15, took it up a notch when I started driving, another notch when I hit college, yet another notch when I left Ma and Pa and bought my first house after pharmacy school, and then I switched to a full-time dipper (a healthier alternative ya know...duh!) at 28 when I started a new addiction to running...Up to a can +/- of Grizz Wintergreen QD when I woke the fuck up and started to seriously search for help and try to understand why the fuck I was doing this and why the fuck I could't stop...enter ktc.org.
SayrahAnne
Name: Sarah
Age: 22
Day Job: Nanny/Maid/Student
Sports: I love football. College over Professional. GA Bulldogs!
For Fun: I love to sing, so I go to karaoke. I love music in general, and like to help write songs. I like to go to the bar with friends. If I find quiet time, I love to read.
Addiction: I started 5/19/2007. I quit 5/19/2011. 4 Years to the day. I'd dip whatever, but I mainly did skoal berry blend pouches. At least half a can a day, but sometimes more. PROUD TO BE QUIT!
DippinFool
Name: Francis
Age: 38
Day Job: Meteorologist
Sports: Golf mostly
For Fun: Enjoying taking my speedboat out on the water, always a good time. Deep sea fishing is also a hobby
Addiction: 22 years, pretty much anything i could get my hands on. mostly cope, also some skoal wintergreen
per034
Name: Pat
Age: 38
Day Job: Professional Liar (normally known as "Marketing")
Sports: Golf, Mets and Giants for teams
For Fun: Chillin with my Chillun.Competitive bagpiping. Hitting the sauce.
Addiction: 25+ years. Copenhagen. Can a Day. Proud to be quit of that shit.
Onelegrus
Name: Rusty
Age: 48
Day Job:Sales Consultant
Sports: Alabama Football, Braves. Hawks, Falcons
For Fun: League Pool, Hanging out with the wife, Fishing
Addiction:30+years, every type of nicotine product available, the last 10 years a can of Grizzley a day
Dante
Name: Danny
Age: 36
Day Job: Federal Law Enforcement Officer
Sports: Mets fan living in a Phillies market, so that sucks
For Fun: Playing golf, cooking, firing up my smoke pit for some good BBQ
Addiction: Marlboro Ultra light menthol-pack a day for about 12 years, transitioned to Skoal (insert random flavor here) long cut five years ago-can every day or two. No more!
-
Thought it would be a good idea to keep this alive and well here. I may have knocked some of my fellow Quitheads off on accident... please check.
Get-to-know-a-brotha
Listen up my Augustonians! You've got a brother at Half-a-HOF now so I think we are a little overdue for our formal introductions; Example:
FunnyLatino
Name: FunnyLatino
Day Job: Deputy Sheriff
Age: 35
Sports: Football, anything from Colorado... Love CU Buffs.
For Fun: Performing standup comedy, DJ music at weddings, parties, etc.. eating good mexican food...
Addiction Summary: Chewed since May 4, 1998, skoal mint, about a can every two days towards the end.
Cancrusher
Name: Austin
Age: 24
Day Job: Admissions Counselor
Sports: Not really much of a sports follower. Enjoy going to Reds games and watching college football basketball.
For fun: I love grilling out on my Weber, tossin' back a few cold ones, playing my guitars (I have way more than anyone should; My USA Fender Strat is my baby), messing with the general public in any way I can, watching classic movies, and ummm....QUITTING!
Addiction Summary: chewed / smoked from the age of 14 - 23. Quit on May 15, 2010 (394 Days ago). Now enjoying every moment of life to the fullest!
Edromero
Name: Ed Romero
Age: 36
Day Job: Cremation Oven Salesman
Sports: only watch motorcycle racing or fishing
For fun: lift weights, running, swimming, motorcycling, tugging my peg.
Addiction Summary: tobacco in any form 13-36.
gmann
Name: gmann
Age: 36
Day Job: Lawya
Sports: I only watch college football (Georgia is my favorite team and should be yours, too) and the Masters tournament. Everything else is gay.
For fun: I play golf and slay ducks.
Addiction Summary: Skoal Straight/15 years.
wardamneagle1979
Name: Andrew
Age:32
Day Job: Teacher/Coach
Sports: Auburn Football, Braves, Saints..pretty big sports junkie (would bet good $$ that I'm the only person in South Alabama that watched and loved game 7 of the stanley cup last night)
For fun: I fish a lot, spend q.t. with my family, watch sports, and love dogs
Addiction Summary: Skoal Mint for a solid 11 years
kmarren
name: Kevin
age: 42
Occupation: Data Storge Sales
Sports: only watch boxing.
Fun: Music, playing guitar, singing, family, running and quiting!
Addition Summary: Smoked age 15-20 Skoal in any flavor age 20-42
marjwilliams
Name: Marcus
Age: 31
Day Job: fluffer err uh... Banker
Sports: Texas Tech, Mavericks, Rangers, Golf when Tiger's good.
For fun: golf, guns, day drinking, bowling, books, interwebs, evening drinking, fishing
Addiction: 12 years, can-a-day Skoal Straight and Timberwolf straight longcut.
maverick
Name: Mark
Age: 46
Day Job: Field ops
Sports: KC Chiefs
For Fun: Fishing, Cycling, Running, beer drinking, (then more running)
Addiction: Skoal Wintergreen Fine Cut - same shit for 30 years
LLCope
Name: Lance
Age: 39
Day Job: Marketing Manager
Sports: Love Baseball
For Fun: I Run 5k's, 10k's, and my first half and full marathon last year
Addiction: Cope Pouches--straight
jmag
Name: Jason
Age: 33
Day Job: Winegrower
Sports: Seattle Mariners/Seahawks, WSU
For Fun: Fishing, Hunting
Addiction: Copenhagen- 15 years
parry8587
Name: Ian
Age: 23
Day Job: Studying for CPA exam
Sports: Love playing basketball and golf, enjoy watching college basektball/football, nba, golf, and some baseball (Mets)
For Fun: golf, summer league basketball, learning how to invest
Addiction: Grizzly Wintergreen - 8 years
BTM99
Name: Brant
Age: 36
Day Job: Manager of Mail Pharmacy Operations
Sports: STL Cardinals, Mizzou Football, STL Blues Hockey, Football in general and Golf
For Fun: Golf, Reading (into Leadership Development and Process Improvement)
Addiction: 20 years - Kodiak Wintergreen for 10 and Grizzly Wintergreen for 10
RebelDog
Name: Christian
Age: 39
Day Job: Vice President of Operations
Sports: New Orleans Saints, LSU Tigers and a casual Cubbies fan
For Fun: Coaching youth baseball, football camping, hunting, fishing, etc.
Addiction: 20 years - Skoal/RedSeal/Cope-Long Cut Wintergreen. Addict for life.
KilltheKodiak
Name: Mike
Age: 32
Day Job: Mechanical Technitian, Aerospace
Sports: LA Kings, SD Charges and a casual Padres fan
For Fun: BBQing, Water Sports, and punk/ska music
Addiction: 16 years -Kodiak wintergreen, all day -everyday!!
ruderunner
Name: Charlie
Age: 37
Day Job: Enforcement of THE LAW
Sports: Follow Phillies, Eagles and Flyers
For Fun: Coaching whatever the boys are playing. (baseball/hockey) Me: run, bike, swim.
Addiction: 19 years- kodiak, skoal, rooster, grizzly 1-1.5 a day depending on what I was doing. Basically if I wasnt eating or fucking, I was dipping....
dchogs
Name: Ben
Age: 35
Day Job: Director of Admissions @ boarding school
Sports: Redskins, Capitals
For Fun: Coaching the kids in soccer, basketball and swimming; swimming, running, mtn biking, fishing, reading for me time
Addiction: 14 yrs; 21-35. Started briefly with Kodiak, switched to Skoal Mint, switched to Grizz Mint about 2 yrs ago.
theNow
Name: Now (Aprill 2011 group)
Age: 34
Day Job: Legal drug dealer
Sports: Reds, a little NFL if I can't get out in the woods, fishing to pass time; everything pretty much takes a backseat to bowhunting Ohio whitetail (got me a new PSE Axe 6 last fall after 12 years with my original PSE...Love it!). Will also dabble with anything else that's in season in the Buckeye state.
For fun: my wife, son (4yrs), daughter (2 yrs), beer, guns, the farm, running, and scheming for the deer season in the offseason...
Addiction: because it was cool I began dabbling with any and all tobacco but mostly cigarettes around 15, took it up a notch when I started driving, another notch when I hit college, yet another notch when I left Ma and Pa and bought my first house after pharmacy school, and then I switched to a full-time dipper (a healthier alternative ya know...duh!) at 28 when I started a new addiction to running...Up to a can +/- of Grizz Wintergreen QD when I woke the fuck up and started to seriously search for help and try to understand why the fuck I was doing this and why the fuck I could't stop...enter ktc.org.
SayrahAnne
Name: Sarah
Age: 22
Day Job: Nanny/Maid/Student
Sports: I love football. College over Professional. GA Bulldogs!
For Fun: I love to sing, so I go to karaoke. I love music in general, and like to help write songs. I like to go to the bar with friends. If I find quiet time, I love to read.
Addiction: I started 5/19/2007. I quit 5/19/2011. 4 Years to the day. I'd dip whatever, but I mainly did skoal berry blend pouches. At least half a can a day, but sometimes more. PROUD TO BE QUIT!
DippinFool
Name: Francis
Age: 38
Day Job: Meteorologist
Sports: Golf mostly
For Fun: Enjoying taking my speedboat out on the water, always a good time. Deep sea fishing is also a hobby
Addiction: 22 years, pretty much anything i could get my hands on. mostly cope, also some skoal wintergreen
per034
Name: Pat
Age: 38
Day Job: Professional Liar (normally known as "Marketing")
Sports: Golf, Mets and Giants for teams
For Fun: Chillin with my Chillun.Competitive bagpiping. Hitting the sauce.
Addiction: 25+ years. Copenhagen. Can a Day. Proud to be quit of that shit.
Onelegrus
Name: Rusty
Age: 48
Day Job:Sales Consultant
Sports: Alabama Football, Braves. Hawks, Falcons
For Fun: League Pool, Hanging out with the wife, Fishing
Addiction:30+years, every type of nicotine product available, the last 10 years a can of Grizzley a day
Dante
Name: Danny
Age: 36
Day Job: Federal Law Enforcement Officer
Sports: Mets fan living in a Phillies market, so that sucks
For Fun: Playing golf, cooking, firing up my smoke pit for some good BBQ
Addiction: Marlboro Ultra light menthol-pack a day for about 12 years, transitioned to Skoal (insert random flavor here) long cut five years ago-can every day or two. No more!
Rootboy Slim
name: Vince
Day Job: retired reporter, current PR/Media Relation Manager for large Bank
Age: 48
Sports: baseball nut, like 'em all though, O's, Nats, Giatns, Redskins, Caps, Wizards, Terps
For fun: Beer, bbq, baseball, vacation
Addiction: On and Off 25 tears, skoal, red man golden blend wrapped in Bubble Yum, flavored skoals, Rooster and finally Grizzly
-
Thought it would be a good idea to keep this alive and well here. I may have knocked some of my fellow Quitheads off on accident... please check.
Get-to-know-a-brotha
Listen up my Augustonians! You've got a brother at Half-a-HOF now so I think we are a little overdue for our formal introductions; Example:
FunnyLatino
Name: FunnyLatino
Day Job: Deputy Sheriff
Age: 35
Sports: Football, anything from Colorado... Love CU Buffs.
For Fun: Performing standup comedy, DJ music at weddings, parties, etc.. eating good mexican food...
Addiction Summary: Chewed since May 4, 1998, skoal mint, about a can every two days towards the end.
Cancrusher
Name: Austin
Age: 24
Day Job: Admissions Counselor
Sports: Not really much of a sports follower. Enjoy going to Reds games and watching college football basketball.
For fun: I love grilling out on my Weber, tossin' back a few cold ones, playing my guitars (I have way more than anyone should; My USA Fender Strat is my baby), messing with the general public in any way I can, watching classic movies, and ummm....QUITTING!
Addiction Summary: chewed / smoked from the age of 14 - 23. Quit on May 15, 2010 (394 Days ago). Now enjoying every moment of life to the fullest!
Edromero
Name: Ed Romero
Age: 36
Day Job: Cremation Oven Salesman
Sports: only watch motorcycle racing or fishing
For fun: lift weights, running, swimming, motorcycling, tugging my peg.
Addiction Summary: tobacco in any form 13-36.
gmann
Name: gmann
Age: 36
Day Job: Lawya
Sports: I only watch college football (Georgia is my favorite team and should be yours, too) and the Masters tournament. Everything else is gay.
For fun: I play golf and slay ducks.
Addiction Summary: Skoal Straight/15 years.
wardamneagle1979
Name: Andrew
Age:32
Day Job: Teacher/Coach
Sports: Auburn Football, Braves, Saints..pretty big sports junkie (would bet good $$ that I'm the only person in South Alabama that watched and loved game 7 of the stanley cup last night)
For fun: I fish a lot, spend q.t. with my family, watch sports, and love dogs
Addiction Summary: Skoal Mint for a solid 11 years
kmarren
name: Kevin
age: 42
Occupation: Data Storge Sales
Sports: only watch boxing.
Fun: Music, playing guitar, singing, family, running and quiting!
Addition Summary: Smoked age 15-20 Skoal in any flavor age 20-42
marjwilliams
Name: Marcus
Age: 31
Day Job: fluffer err uh... Banker
Sports: Texas Tech, Mavericks, Rangers, Golf when Tiger's good.
For fun: golf, guns, day drinking, bowling, books, interwebs, evening drinking, fishing
Addiction: 12 years, can-a-day Skoal Straight and Timberwolf straight longcut.
maverick
Name: Mark
Age: 46
Day Job: Field ops
Sports: KC Chiefs
For Fun: Fishing, Cycling, Running, beer drinking, (then more running)
Addiction: Skoal Wintergreen Fine Cut - same shit for 30 years
LLCope
Name: Lance
Age: 39
Day Job: Marketing Manager
Sports: Love Baseball
For Fun: I Run 5k's, 10k's, and my first half and full marathon last year
Addiction: Cope Pouches--straight
jmag
Name: Jason
Age: 33
Day Job: Winegrower
Sports: Seattle Mariners/Seahawks, WSU
For Fun: Fishing, Hunting
Addiction: Copenhagen- 15 years
parry8587
Name: Ian
Age: 23
Day Job: Studying for CPA exam
Sports: Love playing basketball and golf, enjoy watching college basektball/football, nba, golf, and some baseball (Mets)
For Fun: golf, summer league basketball, learning how to invest
Addiction: Grizzly Wintergreen - 8 years
BTM99
Name: Brant
Age: 36
Day Job: Manager of Mail Pharmacy Operations
Sports: STL Cardinals, Mizzou Football, STL Blues Hockey, Football in general and Golf
For Fun: Golf, Reading (into Leadership Development and Process Improvement)
Addiction: 20 years - Kodiak Wintergreen for 10 and Grizzly Wintergreen for 10
RebelDog
Name: Christian
Age: 39
Day Job: Vice President of Operations
Sports: New Orleans Saints, LSU Tigers and a casual Cubbies fan
For Fun: Coaching youth baseball, football camping, hunting, fishing, etc.
Addiction: 20 years - Skoal/RedSeal/Cope-Long Cut Wintergreen. Addict for life.
KilltheKodiak
Name: Mike
Age: 32
Day Job: Mechanical Technitian, Aerospace
Sports: LA Kings, SD Charges and a casual Padres fan
For Fun: BBQing, Water Sports, and punk/ska music
Addiction: 16 years -Kodiak wintergreen, all day -everyday!!
ruderunner
Name: Charlie
Age: 37
Day Job: Enforcement of THE LAW
Sports: Follow Phillies, Eagles and Flyers
For Fun: Coaching whatever the boys are playing. (baseball/hockey) Me: run, bike, swim.
Addiction: 19 years- kodiak, skoal, rooster, grizzly 1-1.5 a day depending on what I was doing. Basically if I wasnt eating or fucking, I was dipping....
dchogs
Name: Ben
Age: 35
Day Job: Director of Admissions @ boarding school
Sports: Redskins, Capitals
For Fun: Coaching the kids in soccer, basketball and swimming; swimming, running, mtn biking, fishing, reading for me time
Addiction: 14 yrs; 21-35. Started briefly with Kodiak, switched to Skoal Mint, switched to Grizz Mint about 2 yrs ago.
theNow
Name: Now (Aprill 2011 group)
Age: 34
Day Job: Legal drug dealer
Sports: Reds, a little NFL if I can't get out in the woods, fishing to pass time; everything pretty much takes a backseat to bowhunting Ohio whitetail (got me a new PSE Axe 6 last fall after 12 years with my original PSE...Love it!). Will also dabble with anything else that's in season in the Buckeye state.
For fun: my wife, son (4yrs), daughter (2 yrs), beer, guns, the farm, running, and scheming for the deer season in the offseason...
Addiction: because it was cool I began dabbling with any and all tobacco but mostly cigarettes around 15, took it up a notch when I started driving, another notch when I hit college, yet another notch when I left Ma and Pa and bought my first house after pharmacy school, and then I switched to a full-time dipper (a healthier alternative ya know...duh!) at 28 when I started a new addiction to running...Up to a can +/- of Grizz Wintergreen QD when I woke the fuck up and started to seriously search for help and try to understand why the fuck I was doing this and why the fuck I could't stop...enter ktc.org.
SayrahAnne
Name: Sarah
Age: 22
Day Job: Nanny/Maid/Student
Sports: I love football. College over Professional. GA Bulldogs!
For Fun: I love to sing, so I go to karaoke. I love music in general, and like to help write songs. I like to go to the bar with friends. If I find quiet time, I love to read.
Addiction: I started 5/19/2007. I quit 5/19/2011. 4 Years to the day. I'd dip whatever, but I mainly did skoal berry blend pouches. At least half a can a day, but sometimes more. PROUD TO BE QUIT!
DippinFool
Name: Francis
Age: 38
Day Job: Meteorologist
Sports: Golf mostly
For Fun: Enjoying taking my speedboat out on the water, always a good time. Deep sea fishing is also a hobby
Addiction: 22 years, pretty much anything i could get my hands on. mostly cope, also some skoal wintergreen
per034
Name: Pat
Age: 38
Day Job: Professional Liar (normally known as "Marketing")
Sports: Golf, Mets and Giants for teams
For Fun: Chillin with my Chillun.Competitive bagpiping. Hitting the sauce.
Addiction: 25+ years. Copenhagen. Can a Day. Proud to be quit of that shit.
Onelegrus
Name: Rusty
Age: 48
Day Job:Sales Consultant
Sports: Alabama Football, Braves. Hawks, Falcons
For Fun: League Pool, Hanging out with the wife, Fishing
Addiction:30+years, every type of nicotine product available, the last 10 years a can of Grizzley a day
Dante
Name: Danny
Age: 36
Day Job: Federal Law Enforcement Officer
Sports: Mets fan living in a Phillies market, so that sucks
For Fun: Playing golf, cooking, firing up my smoke pit for some good BBQ
Addiction: Marlboro Ultra light menthol-pack a day for about 12 years, transitioned to Skoal (insert random flavor here) long cut five years ago-can every day or two. No more!
Name: Bean
Age: 40...barely
Day Job: Lawya
Sports: Horned Frogs, Cowboys, Mavericks, Rangers, Stars.
For fun: drink, play chess, screw...let's play chess. Actually, bbq, bicycle, golf, lake, pool, kids,...and quoting Blazing Saddles.
Addiction: 20 years of killing myself with Copenhagen fine cut - living free since 9/11/11 and loving it...but still fighting the occassional urge.
-
Thought it would be a good idea to keep this alive and well here. I may have knocked some of my fellow Quitheads off on accident... please check.
Get-to-know-a-brotha
Listen up my Augustonians! You've got a brother at Half-a-HOF now so I think we are a little overdue for our formal introductions; Example:
FunnyLatino
Name: FunnyLatino
Day Job: Deputy Sheriff
Age: 35
Sports: Football, anything from Colorado... Love CU Buffs.
For Fun: Performing standup comedy, DJ music at weddings, parties, etc.. eating good mexican food...
Addiction Summary: Chewed since May 4, 1998, skoal mint, about a can every two days towards the end.
Cancrusher
Name: Austin
Age: 24
Day Job: Admissions Counselor
Sports: Not really much of a sports follower. Enjoy going to Reds games and watching college football basketball.
For fun: I love grilling out on my Weber, tossin' back a few cold ones, playing my guitars (I have way more than anyone should; My USA Fender Strat is my baby), messing with the general public in any way I can, watching classic movies, and ummm....QUITTING!
Addiction Summary: chewed / smoked from the age of 14 - 23. Quit on May 15, 2010 (394 Days ago). Now enjoying every moment of life to the fullest!
Edromero
Name: Ed Romero
Age: 36
Day Job: Cremation Oven Salesman
Sports: only watch motorcycle racing or fishing
For fun: lift weights, running, swimming, motorcycling, tugging my peg.
Addiction Summary: tobacco in any form 13-36.
gmann
Name: gmann
Age: 36
Day Job: Lawya
Sports: I only watch college football (Georgia is my favorite team and should be yours, too) and the Masters tournament. Everything else is gay.
For fun: I play golf and slay ducks.
Addiction Summary: Skoal Straight/15 years.
wardamneagle1979
Name: Andrew
Age:32
Day Job: Teacher/Coach
Sports: Auburn Football, Braves, Saints..pretty big sports junkie (would bet good $$ that I'm the only person in South Alabama that watched and loved game 7 of the stanley cup last night)
For fun: I fish a lot, spend q.t. with my family, watch sports, and love dogs
Addiction Summary: Skoal Mint for a solid 11 years
kmarren
name: Kevin
age: 42
Occupation: Data Storge Sales
Sports: only watch boxing.
Fun: Music, playing guitar, singing, family, running and quiting!
Addition Summary: Smoked age 15-20 Skoal in any flavor age 20-42
marjwilliams
Name: Marcus
Age: 31
Day Job: fluffer err uh... Banker
Sports: Texas Tech, Mavericks, Rangers, Golf when Tiger's good.
For fun: golf, guns, day drinking, bowling, books, interwebs, evening drinking, fishing
Addiction: 12 years, can-a-day Skoal Straight and Timberwolf straight longcut.
maverick
Name: Mark
Age: 46
Day Job: Field ops
Sports: KC Chiefs
For Fun: Fishing, Cycling, Running, beer drinking, (then more running)
Addiction: Skoal Wintergreen Fine Cut - same shit for 30 years
LLCope
Name: Lance
Age: 39
Day Job: Marketing Manager
Sports: Love Baseball
For Fun: I Run 5k's, 10k's, and my first half and full marathon last year
Addiction: Cope Pouches--straight
jmag
Name: Jason
Age: 33
Day Job: Winegrower
Sports: Seattle Mariners/Seahawks, WSU
For Fun: Fishing, Hunting
Addiction: Copenhagen- 15 years
parry8587
Name: Ian
Age: 23
Day Job: Studying for CPA exam
Sports: Love playing basketball and golf, enjoy watching college basektball/football, nba, golf, and some baseball (Mets)
For Fun: golf, summer league basketball, learning how to invest
Addiction: Grizzly Wintergreen - 8 years
BTM99
Name: Brant
Age: 36
Day Job: Manager of Mail Pharmacy Operations
Sports: STL Cardinals, Mizzou Football, STL Blues Hockey, Football in general and Golf
For Fun: Golf, Reading (into Leadership Development and Process Improvement)
Addiction: 20 years - Kodiak Wintergreen for 10 and Grizzly Wintergreen for 10
RebelDog
Name: Christian
Age: 39
Day Job: Vice President of Operations
Sports: New Orleans Saints, LSU Tigers and a casual Cubbies fan
For Fun: Coaching youth baseball, football camping, hunting, fishing, etc.
Addiction: 20 years - Skoal/RedSeal/Cope-Long Cut Wintergreen. Addict for life.
KilltheKodiak
Name: Mike
Age: 32
Day Job: Mechanical Technitian, Aerospace
Sports: LA Kings, SD Charges and a casual Padres fan
For Fun: BBQing, Water Sports, and punk/ska music
Addiction: 16 years -Kodiak wintergreen, all day -everyday!!
ruderunner
Name: Charlie
Age: 37
Day Job: Enforcement of THE LAW
Sports: Follow Phillies, Eagles and Flyers
For Fun: Coaching whatever the boys are playing. (baseball/hockey) Me: run, bike, swim.
Addiction: 19 years- kodiak, skoal, rooster, grizzly 1-1.5 a day depending on what I was doing. Basically if I wasnt eating or fucking, I was dipping....
dchogs
Name: Ben
Age: 35
Day Job: Director of Admissions @ boarding school
Sports: Redskins, Capitals
For Fun: Coaching the kids in soccer, basketball and swimming; swimming, running, mtn biking, fishing, reading for me time
Addiction: 14 yrs; 21-35. Started briefly with Kodiak, switched to Skoal Mint, switched to Grizz Mint about 2 yrs ago.
theNow
Name: Now (Aprill 2011 group)
Age: 34
Day Job: Legal drug dealer
Sports: Reds, a little NFL if I can't get out in the woods, fishing to pass time; everything pretty much takes a backseat to bowhunting Ohio whitetail (got me a new PSE Axe 6 last fall after 12 years with my original PSE...Love it!). Will also dabble with anything else that's in season in the Buckeye state.
For fun: my wife, son (4yrs), daughter (2 yrs), beer, guns, the farm, running, and scheming for the deer season in the offseason...
Addiction: because it was cool I began dabbling with any and all tobacco but mostly cigarettes around 15, took it up a notch when I started driving, another notch when I hit college, yet another notch when I left Ma and Pa and bought my first house after pharmacy school, and then I switched to a full-time dipper (a healthier alternative ya know...duh!) at 28 when I started a new addiction to running...Up to a can +/- of Grizz Wintergreen QD when I woke the fuck up and started to seriously search for help and try to understand why the fuck I was doing this and why the fuck I could't stop...enter ktc.org.
SayrahAnne
Name: Sarah
Age: 22
Day Job: Nanny/Maid/Student
Sports: I love football. College over Professional. GA Bulldogs!
For Fun: I love to sing, so I go to karaoke. I love music in general, and like to help write songs. I like to go to the bar with friends. If I find quiet time, I love to read.
Addiction: I started 5/19/2007. I quit 5/19/2011. 4 Years to the day. I'd dip whatever, but I mainly did skoal berry blend pouches. At least half a can a day, but sometimes more. PROUD TO BE QUIT!
DippinFool
Name: Francis
Age: 38
Day Job: Meteorologist
Sports: Golf mostly
For Fun: Enjoying taking my speedboat out on the water, always a good time. Deep sea fishing is also a hobby
Addiction: 22 years, pretty much anything i could get my hands on. mostly cope, also some skoal wintergreen
per034
Name: Pat
Age: 38
Day Job: Professional Liar (normally known as "Marketing")
Sports: Golf, Mets and Giants for teams
For Fun: Chillin with my Chillun.Competitive bagpiping. Hitting the sauce.
Addiction: 25+ years. Copenhagen. Can a Day. Proud to be quit of that shit.
Onelegrus
Name: Rusty
Age: 48
Day Job:Sales Consultant
Sports: Alabama Football, Braves. Hawks, Falcons
For Fun: League Pool, Hanging out with the wife, Fishing
Addiction:30+years, every type of nicotine product available, the last 10 years a can of Grizzley a day
Dante
Name: Danny
Age: 36
Day Job: Federal Law Enforcement Officer
Sports: Mets fan living in a Phillies market, so that sucks
For Fun: Playing golf, cooking, firing up my smoke pit for some good BBQ
Addiction: Marlboro Ultra light menthol-pack a day for about 12 years, transitioned to Skoal (insert random flavor here) long cut five years ago-can every day or two. No more!
Name: Bean
Age: 40...barely
Day Job: Lawya
Sports: Horned Frogs, Cowboys, Mavericks, Rangers, Stars.
For fun: drink, play chess, screw...let's play chess. Actually, bbq, bicycle, golf, lake, pool, kids,...and quoting Blazing Saddles.
Addiction: 20 years of killing myself with Copenhagen fine cut - living free since 9/11/11 and loving it...but still fighting the occassional urge.
-
Day 73, hour 1.
This is much harder than it used to be. When I started this it seemed pretty easy. The first three days were much easier than I thought they would be. Then before I knew it I had a month under my belt. I was rock-solid. I was quit. Full-on, badass motherfucker quit. Hit a rough patch at day 56. Got through it.... back to full on badass motherfucker quit.
When I posted last, someone said the "70's fog hit you early" - or something like that. It didn't hit me early. That was just the 50's fog. I'm now in the 70's fog and this shit is like pea soup.
I've been on vacation since day 67. I've been on a short vacation before since my quit, so I thought nothing of it. But this time it seems to be different. It's just harder. And I can't explain it. What's weird is that the triggers are gone. I don't want a dip when I'm in the car. I don't want a dip when I'm catching up on e-mails. I want it when I'm washing the dishes. When I'm watching Phineas and Ferb with the kids. These were never triggers. Why are they triggers now?
I think it has everything to do with this stupid fucking spreadsheet (and I mean that in the most loving way possible). I volunteered to take this over when Cancrusher was away for a few days and I wanted to keep it. I loved that spreadsheet. I checked it every day. When the opportunity arose, I took it. I'm grateful to cancrusher for starting it, but it wasn't his responsibility. It was something we should be doing. And I take great personal pride in managing it.
But I think it's taken the place of Roll for me. I find that the days when I skip the spreadsheet, my quit is weaker. I never miss roll. I refuse to miss roll. But at this point, roll is just something I do. It's my promise and I intend to keep it. But when I do that spreadsheet - that's my roll. That's the moment in time when I see all 42 names and feel the connection and realize that my quit is not just for me. It's for them. It's for you. It's for Parry and dchogs, and dante and closer and ktk and Albert (who for some reason stopped posting lyrics) and ed and BTM and rude and marj and sarah and all the other Quitheads who's names are embedded in my brain but space prevents me from mentioning.
I didn't realize that this week. I took a week off from the spreadsheet. This has been my weekest moment in my quit. It's not like I hit the counter at 7-11 looking for a tin of Cope. But this is the time when my quit was weakest. If someone came to me earlier today and said "want a dip?" or "care for a cigar?" - I might have caved. Now that I updated that stupid fucking spreadsheet, my quit is .... not stronger, necessarily. It's tighter.
That's wierd. I just typed that and it feels right. I don't think my quit was ever weak. It might have been loose, but not weak. Stupid, I know. But my quit is tighter today. Becuase of that stupid fucking spreadsheet.
Maybe it's just me, but I think it's important to have something else other than roll to keep you honest. Roll is critical, and I'm not trying to diminish that in any way. But I think after a while, roll becomes a habit and doesn't have the impact it did in week 1 or week 3 or week 8. I'll never stop posting roll. My promise to Cancrusher was to see Wardamneagle through his HOF day and I might give up the spreadsheet then. I think that would be a mistake for me. I need something more than Roll to keep my quit tight.
--------------------------
Sorry if my introduction posts are stream of consciousness. I write these for me to look back on. If they help you, great. If they don't, then I'm sorry - this might sound like I'm being a dick, and I'm not trying to, but at this point, you're not my audience. I am.
-
Right on, brother. Nice post.
I know your post wasn't a plea for thanks, but thanks for keeping it up to date. Let me know if you need some help here and there. I love looking at the sheet... The whole sheet. I like looking at the bamf quitheads and all our 'green.'. I love hunting for yellow. I relish looking at the red and black... To see how far the cavers could have been. I use every aspect of that pain in your ass to strengthen my quit.
Again, thank you for your effort... We don't hold a week's delay against you, but I guess it is a good thing that people are paying attention to it.
It's an honor to be quit with you today.
-
Per I'm going to sound a bit like a foo foo poodle boy here but...my quit has fed off of your quit. I can't say whether you were going through the motions with your words or not but I thought there were times when you encouraged other quitters with words that were so gosh darn tight, my quit was bullet proof just for a little bit. You nailed it. You owned it. So I don't know if its enough of a reason to feel stronger but you've help me quit and I appreciate that. If I can do anything for ya just yell. Something like "Hey Soulfuckface...where are you?"
-
Right on, brother. Nice post.
I know your post wasn't a plea for thanks, but thanks for keeping it up to date. Let me know if you need some help here and there. I love looking at the sheet... The whole sheet. I like looking at the bamf quitheads and all our 'green.'. I love hunting for yellow. I relish looking at the red and black... To see how far the cavers could have been. I use every aspect of that pain in your ass to strengthen my quit.
Again, thank you for your effort... We don't hold a week's delay against you, but I guess it is a good thing that people are paying attention to it.
It's an honor to be quit with you today.
Dchogs nailed it. I appreciate your effort per -- and it goes to show since we have the best spreadsheet of all the current groups. Sorry everyone else... 'na na'
-
Per,
I am on day 71 and I know exactly what you are talking about. A few days ago I needed to talk to a vet---so I PM'ed TCope. My quit is a little tougher now than over the past couple weeks. I am having cravings at wierd times. I am wondering if it will ever change and be normal. When I spoke with TCope he reminded me that this is a time where feeling this way is normal---it is The BLAHS. It is a time for all of us August brothers to circle the wagons and stay in touch with each other--we must dig in our heals---and stay involved on the site even more.
LL
-
Day 73, hour 1.
This is much harder than it used to be. When I started this it seemed pretty easy. The first three days were much easier than I thought they would be. Then before I knew it I had a month under my belt. I was rock-solid. I was quit. Full-on, badass motherfucker quit. Hit a rough patch at day 56. Got through it.... back to full on badass motherfucker quit.
When I posted last, someone said the "70's fog hit you early" - or something like that. It didn't hit me early. That was just the 50's fog. I'm now in the 70's fog and this shit is like pea soup.
I've been on vacation since day 67. I've been on a short vacation before since my quit, so I thought nothing of it. But this time it seems to be different. It's just harder. And I can't explain it. What's weird is that the triggers are gone. I don't want a dip when I'm in the car. I don't want a dip when I'm catching up on e-mails. I want it when I'm washing the dishes. When I'm watching Phineas and Ferb with the kids. These were never triggers. Why are they triggers now?
I think it has everything to do with this stupid fucking spreadsheet (and I mean that in the most loving way possible). I volunteered to take this over when Cancrusher was away for a few days and I wanted to keep it. I loved that spreadsheet. I checked it every day. When the opportunity arose, I took it. I'm grateful to cancrusher for starting it, but it wasn't his responsibility. It was something we should be doing. And I take great personal pride in managing it.
But I think it's taken the place of Roll for me. I find that the days when I skip the spreadsheet, my quit is weaker. I never miss roll. I refuse to miss roll. But at this point, roll is just something I do. It's my promise and I intend to keep it. But when I do that spreadsheet - that's my roll. That's the moment in time when I see all 42 names and feel the connection and realize that my quit is not just for me. It's for them. It's for you. It's for Parry and dchogs, and dante and closer and ktk and Albert (who for some reason stopped posting lyrics) and ed and BTM and rude and marj and sarah and all the other Quitheads who's names are embedded in my brain but space prevents me from mentioning.
I didn't realize that this week. I took a week off from the spreadsheet. This has been my weekest moment in my quit. It's not like I hit the counter at 7-11 looking for a tin of Cope. But this is the time when my quit was weakest. If someone came to me earlier today and said "want a dip?" or "care for a cigar?" - I might have caved. Now that I updated that stupid fucking spreadsheet, my quit is .... not stronger, necessarily. It's tighter.
That's wierd. I just typed that and it feels right. I don't think my quit was ever weak. It might have been loose, but not weak. Stupid, I know. But my quit is tighter today. Becuase of that stupid fucking spreadsheet.
Maybe it's just me, but I think it's important to have something else other than roll to keep you honest. Roll is critical, and I'm not trying to diminish that in any way. But I think after a while, roll becomes a habit and doesn't have the impact it did in week 1 or week 3 or week 8. I'll never stop posting roll. My promise to Cancrusher was to see Wardamneagle through his HOF day and I might give up the spreadsheet then. I think that would be a mistake for me. I need something more than Roll to keep my quit tight.
--------------------------
Sorry if my introduction posts are stream of consciousness. I write these for me to look back on. If they help you, great. If they don't, then I'm sorry - this might sound like I'm being a dick, and I'm not trying to, but at this point, you're not my audience. I am.
Per - I know exactly where you are coming from. My May 11 brothers have offered to take over the sheet for a week or so to help out, and I appreciate the hell out of them for it, but the whole time something felt "off."
I think you nailed how I felt about it in your post, especially this
I don't think my quit was ever weak. It might have been loose, but not weak. Stupid, I know. But my quit is tighter today. Becuase of that stupid fucking spreadsheet.
Right on brother. Thanks for this.
-
Day 73, hour 1.
This is much harder than it used to be. When I started this it seemed pretty easy. The first three days were much easier than I thought they would be. Then before I knew it I had a month under my belt. I was rock-solid. I was quit. Full-on, badass motherfucker quit. Hit a rough patch at day 56. Got through it.... back to full on badass motherfucker quit.
When I posted last, someone said the "70's fog hit you early" - or something like that. It didn't hit me early. That was just the 50's fog. I'm now in the 70's fog and this shit is like pea soup.
I've been on vacation since day 67. I've been on a short vacation before since my quit, so I thought nothing of it. But this time it seems to be different. It's just harder. And I can't explain it. What's weird is that the triggers are gone. I don't want a dip when I'm in the car. I don't want a dip when I'm catching up on e-mails. I want it when I'm washing the dishes. When I'm watching Phineas and Ferb with the kids. These were never triggers. Why are they triggers now?
I think it has everything to do with this stupid fucking spreadsheet (and I mean that in the most loving way possible). I volunteered to take this over when Cancrusher was away for a few days and I wanted to keep it. I loved that spreadsheet. I checked it every day. When the opportunity arose, I took it. I'm grateful to cancrusher for starting it, but it wasn't his responsibility. It was something we should be doing. And I take great personal pride in managing it.
But I think it's taken the place of Roll for me. I find that the days when I skip the spreadsheet, my quit is weaker. I never miss roll. I refuse to miss roll. But at this point, roll is just something I do. It's my promise and I intend to keep it. But when I do that spreadsheet - that's my roll. That's the moment in time when I see all 42 names and feel the connection and realize that my quit is not just for me. It's for them. It's for you. It's for Parry and dchogs, and dante and closer and ktk and Albert (who for some reason stopped posting lyrics) and ed and BTM and rude and marj and sarah and all the other Quitheads who's names are embedded in my brain but space prevents me from mentioning.
I didn't realize that this week. I took a week off from the spreadsheet. This has been my weekest moment in my quit. It's not like I hit the counter at 7-11 looking for a tin of Cope. But this is the time when my quit was weakest. If someone came to me earlier today and said "want a dip?" or "care for a cigar?" - I might have caved. Now that I updated that stupid fucking spreadsheet, my quit is .... not stronger, necessarily. It's tighter.
That's wierd. I just typed that and it feels right. I don't think my quit was ever weak. It might have been loose, but not weak. Stupid, I know. But my quit is tighter today. Becuase of that stupid fucking spreadsheet.
Maybe it's just me, but I think it's important to have something else other than roll to keep you honest. Roll is critical, and I'm not trying to diminish that in any way. But I think after a while, roll becomes a habit and doesn't have the impact it did in week 1 or week 3 or week 8. I'll never stop posting roll. My promise to Cancrusher was to see Wardamneagle through his HOF day and I might give up the spreadsheet then. I think that would be a mistake for me. I need something more than Roll to keep my quit tight.
--------------------------
Sorry if my introduction posts are stream of consciousness. I write these for me to look back on. If they help you, great. If they don't, then I'm sorry - this might sound like I'm being a dick, and I'm not trying to, but at this point, you're not my audience. I am.
Per - I know exactly where you are coming from. My May 11 brothers have offered to take over the sheet for a week or so to help out, and I appreciate the hell out of them for it, but the whole time something felt "off."
I think you nailed how I felt about it in your post, especially this
I don't think my quit was ever weak. It might have been loose, but not weak. Stupid, I know. But my quit is tighter today. Becuase of that stupid fucking spreadsheet.
Right on brother. Thanks for this.
per,
You know....that I know....exactly where you're coming from. 1st of all, I fuckin' hated the 'late' fogs, 50-70 etc. Bullshit man, they hit me like a rouge wave. I never felt more grounded in my Quit then when I emerged from those late hits. So fuck it, they were a blessing in disguise. A little 'send-me-off' from the nic-bitch before I reached the HOF.
Secondly, there are a group of people much like you and I who are what I like to call "all or nothing" people. Post roll everyday? Ok, done, did that, now what?! I need more! What else can I do? I want to feeeeel it. I want to live it. I want to breath it. That is what the spreadsheet was for me too. I think everyone should keep their own copy on their computers. It's just so gratifying to fill in those little days. And I'll tell you this, you would be hard pressed to find someone more invested in each of your Quit brother's Quits than you are my friend. And that is why you are a cornerstone in this community.
Leave, and we will notice :)
Keep up the great work brother.
P.s. is it sad that I enjoy watching Phineas and Ferb by myself?
-
Day 73, hour 1.
This is much harder than it used to be. When I started this it seemed pretty easy. The first three days were much easier than I thought they would be. Then before I knew it I had a month under my belt. I was rock-solid. I was quit. Full-on, badass motherfucker quit. Hit a rough patch at day 56. Got through it.... back to full on badass motherfucker quit.
When I posted last, someone said the "70's fog hit you early" - or something like that. It didn't hit me early. That was just the 50's fog. I'm now in the 70's fog and this shit is like pea soup.
I've been on vacation since day 67. I've been on a short vacation before since my quit, so I thought nothing of it. But this time it seems to be different. It's just harder. And I can't explain it. What's weird is that the triggers are gone. I don't want a dip when I'm in the car. I don't want a dip when I'm catching up on e-mails. I want it when I'm washing the dishes. When I'm watching Phineas and Ferb with the kids. These were never triggers. Why are they triggers now?
I think it has everything to do with this stupid fucking spreadsheet (and I mean that in the most loving way possible). I volunteered to take this over when Cancrusher was away for a few days and I wanted to keep it. I loved that spreadsheet. I checked it every day. When the opportunity arose, I took it. I'm grateful to cancrusher for starting it, but it wasn't his responsibility. It was something we should be doing. And I take great personal pride in managing it.
But I think it's taken the place of Roll for me. I find that the days when I skip the spreadsheet, my quit is weaker. I never miss roll. I refuse to miss roll. But at this point, roll is just something I do. It's my promise and I intend to keep it. But when I do that spreadsheet - that's my roll. That's the moment in time when I see all 42 names and feel the connection and realize that my quit is not just for me. It's for them. It's for you. It's for Parry and dchogs, and dante and closer and ktk and Albert (who for some reason stopped posting lyrics) and ed and BTM and rude and marj and sarah and all the other Quitheads who's names are embedded in my brain but space prevents me from mentioning.
I didn't realize that this week. I took a week off from the spreadsheet. This has been my weekest moment in my quit. It's not like I hit the counter at 7-11 looking for a tin of Cope. But this is the time when my quit was weakest. If someone came to me earlier today and said "want a dip?" or "care for a cigar?" - I might have caved. Now that I updated that stupid fucking spreadsheet, my quit is .... not stronger, necessarily. It's tighter.
That's wierd. I just typed that and it feels right. I don't think my quit was ever weak. It might have been loose, but not weak. Stupid, I know. But my quit is tighter today. Becuase of that stupid fucking spreadsheet.
Maybe it's just me, but I think it's important to have something else other than roll to keep you honest. Roll is critical, and I'm not trying to diminish that in any way. But I think after a while, roll becomes a habit and doesn't have the impact it did in week 1 or week 3 or week 8. I'll never stop posting roll. My promise to Cancrusher was to see Wardamneagle through his HOF day and I might give up the spreadsheet then. I think that would be a mistake for me. I need something more than Roll to keep my quit tight.
--------------------------
Sorry if my introduction posts are stream of consciousness. I write these for me to look back on. If they help you, great. If they don't, then I'm sorry - this might sound like I'm being a dick, and I'm not trying to, but at this point, you're not my audience. I am.
Per - I know exactly where you are coming from. My May 11 brothers have offered to take over the sheet for a week or so to help out, and I appreciate the hell out of them for it, but the whole time something felt "off."
I think you nailed how I felt about it in your post, especially this
I don't think my quit was ever weak. It might have been loose, but not weak. Stupid, I know. But my quit is tighter today. Becuase of that stupid fucking spreadsheet.
Right on brother. Thanks for this.
per,
You know....that I know....exactly where you're coming from. 1st of all, I fuckin' hated the 'late' fogs, 50-70 etc. Bullshit man, they hit me like a rouge wave. I never felt more grounded in my Quit then when I emerged from those late hits. So fuck it, they were a blessing in disguise. A little 'send-me-off' from the nic-bitch before I reached the HOF.
Secondly, there are a group of people much like you and I who are what I like to call "all or nothing" people. Post roll everyday? Ok, done, did that, now what?! I need more! What else can I do? I want to feeeeel it. I want to live it. I want to breath it. That is what the spreadsheet was for me too. I think everyone should keep their own copy on their computers. It's just so gratifying to fill in those little days. And I'll tell you this, you would be hard pressed to find someone more invested in each of your Quit brother's Quits than you are my friend. And that is why you are a cornerstone in this community.
Leave, and we will notice :)
Keep up the great work brother.
P.s. is it sad that I enjoy watching Phineas and Ferb by myself?
per...i know from watching at a distance that you are one of the most involved people on here...the spreadsheet sounds like a great way to keep you focused, but let me make another suggestion as well...
Pick a newbie...any newbie...and make his or her quit your business. When I say that I don't mean just posting something on their intro...but really get personally involved with them. 2 or 3 PM's a day, make them directly accountable...hit them with your number before they ask. You may already do all of that, but I'll tell you it has saved my quit more than once.
I went through an incredible fog from about 68-76 or 77, just mind numbing...but then I found a couple of guys and really got involved with them and it went away...and I get the feeling of "tighter" because thats exactly the feeling I got.
Anyway...at about a year I left the boards and "almost" caved several times...fortunately for me nmc shot me an email one day out of the blue...and I came back. Ever since then I have picked one or two newbies every month and get real personally involved in their quit and it has kept me "tight" to the boards and "tighter" to my own quit ever since.
Keep it up bro, you sir are a great quitter and I'm proud to be here with you!
-
Per,
You are doing great bro...I'm proud to be here alongside you!
Tight...I get it. Awesome.
-
I know what you mean. 70s sucked for me. Really sucked. Just keep bringing the quit. You are wearing her ass out. She is about to give up full assaults and will have to resort to small little craves and small other bullshit. Keep bringing the quit.
-
Day 78.
My brother called me today. I was planning on calling him but he called me before I could. Said "I was just about to call you." He said Bullshit and I said "no, I was going to get a cup of coffee and then call you."
Then he asked how much coffee do I drink and I said well, since I quit dipping, about 17 cups a day. He didn't know I quit. It wasn't a secret. He lives in Maine, I live in Jersey. it never came up. He asked me how long I've been quit for. I told him 78 days. He said "like, exactly 78 days? You know the exact number of days?" I told him yes - it was part of my quit plan.
And then -- almost as if stunned -- he said to me "wow, you really are an addict!" This is my oldest brother. Probably the man I admire most in my life. And my first reaction - which I didn't say out loud - was "you fucking dope. I've been dipping since I was 12. Of course I'm an addict."
Instead I explained to him this site. And it wasn't until 10 minutes later that I realized I was talking about KTC like it was the child I was so proud of. I was bragging about how great the people were and how important this whole experience was to me and how this site will always be a part of my life.
I'm proud to be a Quithead today.
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Day 78.
My brother called me today. I was planning on calling him but he called me before I could. Said "I was just about to call you." He said Bullshit and I said "no, I was going to get a cup of coffee and then call you."
Then he asked how much coffee do I drink and I said well, since I quit dipping, about 17 cups a day. He didn't know I quit. It wasn't a secret. He lives in Maine, I live in Jersey. it never came up. He asked me how long I've been quit for. I told him 78 days. He said "like, exactly 78 days? You know the exact number of days?" I told him yes - it was part of my quit plan.
And then -- almost as if stunned -- he said to me "wow, you really are an addict!" This is my oldest brother. Probably the man I admire most in my life. And my first reaction - which I didn't say out loud - was "you fucking dope. I've been dipping since I was 12. Of course I'm an addict."
Instead I explained to him this site. And it wasn't until 10 minutes later that I realized I was talking about KTC like it was the child I was so proud of. I was bragging about how great the people were and how important this whole experience was to me and how this site will always be a part of my life.
I'm proud to be a Quithead today.
:)
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Day 78.
My brother called me today. I was planning on calling him but he called me before I could. Said "I was just about to call you." He said Bullshit and I said "no, I was going to get a cup of coffee and then call you."
Then he asked how much coffee do I drink and I said well, since I quit dipping, about 17 cups a day. He didn't know I quit. It wasn't a secret. He lives in Maine, I live in Jersey. it never came up. He asked me how long I've been quit for. I told him 78 days. He said "like, exactly 78 days? You know the exact number of days?" I told him yes - it was part of my quit plan.
And then -- almost as if stunned -- he said to me "wow, you really are an addict!" This is my oldest brother. Probably the man I admire most in my life. And my first reaction - which I didn't say out loud - was "you fucking dope. I've been dipping since I was 12. Of course I'm an addict."
Instead I explained to him this site. And it wasn't until 10 minutes later that I realized I was talking about KTC like it was the child I was so proud of. I was bragging about how great the people were and how important this whole experience was to me and how this site will always be a part of my life.
I'm proud to be a Quithead today.
Great stuff, per - I am one proud dude to be quit with you daily!
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i think you have a few more brothers now...you stinkin' addict 'archer'
Cheers bro
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Day 78.
My brother called me today. I was planning on calling him but he called me before I could. Said "I was just about to call you." He said Bullshit and I said "no, I was going to get a cup of coffee and then call you."
Then he asked how much coffee do I drink and I said well, since I quit dipping, about 17 cups a day. He didn't know I quit. It wasn't a secret. He lives in Maine, I live in Jersey. it never came up. He asked me how long I've been quit for. I told him 78 days. He said "like, exactly 78 days? You know the exact number of days?" I told him yes - it was part of my quit plan.
And then -- almost as if stunned -- he said to me "wow, you really are an addict!" This is my oldest brother. Probably the man I admire most in my life. And my first reaction - which I didn't say out loud - was "you fucking dope. I've been dipping since I was 12. Of course I'm an addict."
Instead I explained to him this site. And it wasn't until 10 minutes later that I realized I was talking about KTC like it was the child I was so proud of. I was bragging about how great the people were and how important this whole experience was to me and how this site will always be a part of my life.
I'm proud to be a Quithead today.
:)
Literally made me smile. I needed that this morning. What you just said is something that I'd forgotten for some time now. Great refresher brother! Kick some nic_Biaaaatch ass today!
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Day 78.
My brother called me today. I was planning on calling him but he called me before I could. Said "I was just about to call you." He said Bullshit and I said "no, I was going to get a cup of coffee and then call you."
Then he asked how much coffee do I drink and I said well, since I quit dipping, about 17 cups a day. He didn't know I quit. It wasn't a secret. He lives in Maine, I live in Jersey. it never came up. He asked me how long I've been quit for. I told him 78 days. He said "like, exactly 78 days? You know the exact number of days?" I told him yes - it was part of my quit plan.
And then -- almost as if stunned -- he said to me "wow, you really are an addict!" This is my oldest brother. Probably the man I admire most in my life. And my first reaction - which I didn't say out loud - was "you fucking dope. I've been dipping since I was 12. Of course I'm an addict."
Instead I explained to him this site. And it wasn't until 10 minutes later that I realized I was talking about KTC like it was the child I was so proud of. I was bragging about how great the people were and how important this whole experience was to me and how this site will always be a part of my life.
I'm proud to be a Quithead today.
not sure how i missed this per, but great post.
this place has saved my life by showing me the way. i've done the work (and i had that capability in me the whole fucking time), but it was the combination of time, place, people, and well placed kicks in the ass that got me started down this road.
also, your big bro may not have said it, but i'm sure he didn't like you dipping. i'd wager he's also happy as hell that you're quit.
keep up the good quit!
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Per,
Thanks for this inspiring post----KTC has given me a personal mission also: #1 to establish my own daily quit #2 to help others quit--through this site and off this site.
You and I will become HOF on the same day--I am proud to quit with you. However, day 78--today is the most important day of our quit
LL
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Per,
Thanks for that. Simple and timely. Outstanding.
Marcus
In the meantime let's continue to collectively take the buzz-saw of free floating aggression to the NB today!
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87 days in.
I feel good. I just wish the cravings would stop. I get them all time. When I get those cravings, I really want a dip. I was thinking about a very brief conversation I had with Cronk yesterday on my way to work this morning. And I thought about why it is that we Quitheads still want to dip, despite the consequences that we all know. Then I started thinking about those consequences and the consequences of other things I'd want. I want to rob a bank because it would be nice to be obscenely wealthy. But IÂ’m not willing to pay the consequences (jail time). I want to bang Asian waitresses three at a time. But IÂ’m not willing to pay the consequences (disease, divorce). And sometimesÂ… well, yes. I want a dip. But IÂ’m not willing to pay the consequences which are undeniable. If I keep dipping, it will kill me.
If I had to rank those consequences I just listed, death is clearly the worst one. So – I guess I’m saying I’m more likely to rob a bank than to put another pinch of dip in my mouth. Every decision I make has a consequence – positive or negative. I might not even realize it. Staying up late… consequence is less sleep. Buying my son a Mets jersey at the game last night? Consequence is less money in my pocket. Playing tea party with my daughter? Consequence is that the lawn didn't get mowed Monday.
Putting a dip in my mouth? Consequence is death. Perhaps not immediate, but certainly sooner than it should come. Consequence is that my children have to watch their father die – not as the man they know today, but as a shriveled, withering mess because of what Cancer will do to him. Consequence is that my wife will suffer for the rest of her life because of my own selfishness.
No. IÂ’m not willing to pay the consequences. I will never again be willing to pay those consequences.
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Keep it up brother - you help me with my quit just by reading your posts!
Do what you are doing - and when you get that urge - just remember that your consequence of caving will affect me as well - so just quit for today!
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Per ---you rock
Just think of this----- on day 187 you may not have any urges! How do you get to day 187----You get to day 187 by quitting TODAY -----Also remember day 87 is much better than day 7(remember day 7!).
So we have a combination of both memory (remembering the pain from day 7) and hope for an even greater freedom as we rack up the days(the knowledge that day 187 is going to be better than day 87). However, the QUIT can only be accomplished today.
Memory + Hope = A good QUIT TODAY--- where the real work of quitting happens.
Fuck those urges! You got this!
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Buying my son a Mets jersey at the game last night? Consequence is less money in my pocket.
Per,
When you speak...poeple need to listen. This is another example of why you and many other quitheads in August are successful. Introspection...look inside to detect what's wrong and fix it, not just "boo-hoo, poor fucking me". Your quit just made mine a little more bulletproof.
Plus you're a Mets fan...so there's that too.
Proud to be quit with you bro!
-Dante
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87 days in.
I feel good. I just wish the cravings would stop. I get them all time. When I get those cravings, I really want a dip. I was thinking about a very brief conversation I had with Cronk yesterday on my way to work this morning. And I thought about why it is that we Quitheads still want to dip, despite the consequences that we all know. Then I started thinking about those consequences and the consequences of other things I'd want. I want to rob a bank because it would be nice to be obscenely wealthy. But IÂ’m not willing to pay the consequences (jail time). I want to bang Asian waitresses three at a time. But IÂ’m not willing to pay the consequences (disease, divorce). And sometimesÂ… well, yes. I want a dip. But IÂ’m not willing to pay the consequences which are undeniable. If I keep dipping, it will kill me.
If I had to rank those consequences I just listed, death is clearly the worst one. So – I guess I’m saying I’m more likely to rob a bank than to put another pinch of dip in my mouth. Every decision I make has a consequence – positive or negative. I might not even realize it. Staying up late… consequence is less sleep. Buying my son a Mets jersey at the game last night? Consequence is less money in my pocket. Playing tea party with my daughter? Consequence is that the lawn didn't get mowed Monday.
Putting a dip in my mouth? Consequence is death. Perhaps not immediate, but certainly sooner than it should come. Consequence is that my children have to watch their father die – not as the man they know today, but as a shriveled, withering mess because of what Cancer will do to him. Consequence is that my wife will suffer for the rest of her life because of my own selfishness.
No. IÂ’m not willing to pay the consequences. I will never again be willing to pay those consequences.
Thank you for this. This is real and I can relate to this. You just helped me today by being able to read your post.
Thank You
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Word.
Late night crave gone.
Neighborhood bank now less safe. :ph43r:
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Consequences...got to be thinking rationally to see them. Good stuff Per.
The more I think about that the more I feel 'duped' by the nic bitch. God I hate her.
I got a question: did you ever think at one point you were willing to pay the consequences? did you just ignore them or was it the need for the nic was just so overwhelming you didn't even see the consequences?
I'm not being a smart ass here. I'm curious what you recall.
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Consequences...got to be thinking rationally to see them. Good stuff Per.
The more I think about that the more I feel 'duped' by the nic bitch. God I hate her.
I got a question: did you ever think at one point you were willing to pay the consequences? did you just ignore them or was it the need for the nic was just so overwhelming you didn't even see the consequences?
I'm not being a smart ass here. I'm curious what you recall.
That's a really good question. I always knew the consequences. As a younger man in my teens and early 20's, I always felt I had plenty of time to quit before the consequences caught up to me. As I got older I became very aware that I was dancing with the devil - and continually rationalized with the quitter's lament "I need to quit. I'll start tomorrow." After all those tomorrow's I'm now pushing 40.
So I always knew the consequences. I just chose to ignore them. If it weren't for KTC I'd still be ignoring them. And now that I have the clarity of 88 days quit, I have a far greater appreciation for the consequences of my addiction. Now I'm addicted to this site, and all of my consequences are positive.
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Consequences...got to be thinking rationally to see them. Good stuff Per.
The more I think about that the more I feel 'duped' by the nic bitch. God I hate her.
I got a question: did you ever think at one point you were willing to pay the consequences? did you just ignore them or was it the need for the nic was just so overwhelming you didn't even see the consequences?
I'm not being a smart ass here. I'm curious what you recall.
That's a really good question. I always knew the consequences. As a younger man in my teens and early 20's, I always felt I had plenty of time to quit before the consequences caught up to me. As I got older I became very aware that I was dancing with the devil - and continually rationalized with the quitter's lament "I need to quit. I'll start tomorrow." After all those tomorrow's I'm now pushing 40.
So I always knew the consequences. I just chose to ignore them. If it weren't for KTC I'd still be ignoring them. And now that I have the clarity of 88 days quit, I have a far greater appreciation for the consequences of my addiction. Now I'm addicted to this site, and all of my consequences are positive.
Word. I knew the consequences and chose to ignore them. I figured the same thing, I'll have years until I need to worry about it. 1st quit was for my wife really, and even though it lasted almost 4 years, my wife is sadly not enough to keep me away from my addiction. Had to do it because I want a better life. I care about the consequences but I don't quit because of them as much as I quit because I'm no slave to anyone or anything. I want to control me and make healthy decisions in the process. Could I get hit by a big ass truck tomorrow? Yep. But at least I didn't lead myself slowly into a heinous death by allowing myself to be tricked that something is helping me. Thanks guys for this topic. It made me think.
Jmiah out
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Day 100.
yes. day 100. I want to keep typing that. day 100 day 100 day 100 day 100....
One day I'll write a HOF speech. This isn't it. I have a pretty good idea what it will be about and what I'll write. My biggest concern is leaving people out when I name names. There have been so many quitters on this site that have inspired me and made my quit tighter. I don't want to forget any one of them when it comes time to name names. But I know I will. And let me apologize ahead of time for that.
Today is my day. I knew in April that today would be special. That it would be a day for me to celebrate. As long as I was still quit when I got here, today would be a day to celebrate. I woke up early this morning and I was quit. The first thing my wife said to me wasn't "get up you fat shit" or "turn the alarm off." No - the first word out of her mouth this morning was congratulations. She had a smile on her face. She's not a morning person. But she was beaming. When my wife smiles she lights up a room. My actions made her smile like that. That makes me proud.
Yesterday one of my colleagues gave his 2-weeks notice. Today I learned that I'm taking responsibility for his team. Of all days to get that news, it's today. My Day. This is a day to celebrate.
It's raining right now, so the day isn't all rainbows and lollipops. But it's a pretty good fricken day.
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Day 100.
yes. day 100. I want to keep typing that. day 100 day 100 day 100 day 100....
One day I'll write a HOF speech. This isn't it. I have a pretty good idea what it will be about and what I'll write. My biggest concern is leaving people out when I name names. There have been so many quitters on this site that have inspired me and made my quit tighter. I don't want to forget any one of them when it comes time to name names. But I know I will. And let me apologize ahead of time for that.
Today is my day. I knew in April that today would be special. That it would be a day for me to celebrate. As long as I was still quit when I got here, today would be a day to celebrate. I woke up early this morning and I was quit. The first thing my wife said to me wasn't "get up you fat shit" or "turn the alarm off." No - the first word out of her mouth this morning was congratulations. She had a smile on her face. She's not a morning person. But she was beaming. When my wife smiles she lights up a room. My actions made her smile like that. That makes me proud.
Yesterday one of my colleagues gave his 2-weeks notice. Today I learned that I'm taking responsibility for his team. Of all days to get that news, it's today. My Day. This is a day to celebrate.
It's raining right now, so the day isn't all rainbows and lollipops. But it's a pretty good fricken day.
Congratulations on your HoF!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
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Day 100.
yes. day 100. I want to keep typing that. day 100 day 100 day 100 day 100....
One day I'll write a HOF speech. This isn't it. I have a pretty good idea what it will be about and what I'll write. My biggest concern is leaving people out when I name names. There have been so many quitters on this site that have inspired me and made my quit tighter. I don't want to forget any one of them when it comes time to name names. But I know I will. And let me apologize ahead of time for that.
Today is my day. I knew in April that today would be special. That it would be a day for me to celebrate. As long as I was still quit when I got here, today would be a day to celebrate. I woke up early this morning and I was quit. The first thing my wife said to me wasn't "get up you fat shit" or "turn the alarm off." No - the first word out of her mouth this morning was congratulations. She had a smile on her face. She's not a morning person. But she was beaming. When my wife smiles she lights up a room. My actions made her smile like that. That makes me proud.
Yesterday one of my colleagues gave his 2-weeks notice. Today I learned that I'm taking responsibility for his team. Of all days to get that news, it's today. My Day. This is a day to celebrate.
It's raining right now, so the day isn't all rainbows and lollipops. But it's a pretty good fricken day.
Any day that per owns per is a day to celebrate. Well done. Celebrate day 101 as well. Freedom is the shit. It is not "free" but it is worth the price.
Congrats.
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Day 100.
yes. day 100. I want to keep typing that. day 100 day 100 day 100 day 100....
One day I'll write a HOF speech. This isn't it. I have a pretty good idea what it will be about and what I'll write. My biggest concern is leaving people out when I name names. There have been so many quitters on this site that have inspired me and made my quit tighter. I don't want to forget any one of them when it comes time to name names. But I know I will. And let me apologize ahead of time for that.
Today is my day. I knew in April that today would be special. That it would be a day for me to celebrate. As long as I was still quit when I got here, today would be a day to celebrate. I woke up early this morning and I was quit. The first thing my wife said to me wasn't "get up you fat shit" or "turn the alarm off." No - the first word out of her mouth this morning was congratulations. She had a smile on her face. She's not a morning person. But she was beaming. When my wife smiles she lights up a room. My actions made her smile like that. That makes me proud.
Yesterday one of my colleagues gave his 2-weeks notice. Today I learned that I'm taking responsibility for his team. Of all days to get that news, it's today. My Day. This is a day to celebrate.
It's raining right now, so the day isn't all rainbows and lollipops. But it's a pretty good fricken day.
An inspiration. Thanks. And congratulations!
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Day 100.
yes. day 100. I want to keep typing that. day 100 day 100 day 100 day 100....
One day I'll write a HOF speech. This isn't it. I have a pretty good idea what it will be about and what I'll write. My biggest concern is leaving people out when I name names. There have been so many quitters on this site that have inspired me and made my quit tighter. I don't want to forget any one of them when it comes time to name names. But I know I will. And let me apologize ahead of time for that.
Today is my day. I knew in April that today would be special. That it would be a day for me to celebrate. As long as I was still quit when I got here, today would be a day to celebrate. I woke up early this morning and I was quit. The first thing my wife said to me wasn't "get up you fat shit" or "turn the alarm off." No - the first word out of her mouth this morning was congratulations. She had a smile on her face. She's not a morning person. But she was beaming. When my wife smiles she lights up a room. My actions made her smile like that. That makes me proud.
Yesterday one of my colleagues gave his 2-weeks notice. Today I learned that I'm taking responsibility for his team. Of all days to get that news, it's today. My Day. This is a day to celebrate.
It's raining right now, so the day isn't all rainbows and lollipops. But it's a pretty good fricken day.
That is awesome. Simple as that. That is just awesome.
Congrats brother.
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Proud to be a Quitter with you!
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I smell quit in here. At 100, My wife asked me when I was going to drop the extra lbs.
Goo to be quit with you.
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Way to go per, proud to be quit w/you!
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Day 100.
yes. day 100. I want to keep typing that. day 100 day 100 day 100 day 100....
One day I'll write a HOF speech. This isn't it. I have a pretty good idea what it will be about and what I'll write. My biggest concern is leaving people out when I name names. There have been so many quitters on this site that have inspired me and made my quit tighter. I don't want to forget any one of them when it comes time to name names. But I know I will. And let me apologize ahead of time for that.
Today is my day. I knew in April that today would be special. That it would be a day for me to celebrate. As long as I was still quit when I got here, today would be a day to celebrate. I woke up early this morning and I was quit. The first thing my wife said to me wasn't "get up you fat shit" or "turn the alarm off." No - the first word out of her mouth this morning was congratulations. She had a smile on her face. She's not a morning person. But she was beaming. When my wife smiles she lights up a room. My actions made her smile like that. That makes me proud.
Yesterday one of my colleagues gave his 2-weeks notice. Today I learned that I'm taking responsibility for his team. Of all days to get that news, it's today. My Day. This is a day to celebrate.
It's raining right now, so the day isn't all rainbows and lollipops. But it's a pretty good fricken day.
That is awesome. Simple as that. That is just awesome.
Congrats brother.
I have to second that SoulMan...The Quit is strong with this one, of that I am certain.
Another beacon of light to the masses that IT CAN BE DONE!
Way to go brother! So happy for you and your family today.
Remember though, this is just the beginning. You dipped a lot longer than you've been Quit. Not trying to knock you down on this glorious day, just plant that in the back of your head. It's a long road, but hey! Guess what! We've got the rest of our lives to get there!
Enjoy the beautiful life you've given yourself!
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I hit a pretty nasty funk today. I was warned. Even at day 114 the craves are hitting. I'm pretty sure it's because I've gone from spending hours on this site every day to spending minutes here. For the past couple of weeks it's been in and out - post roll, get back to work. Things have gotten bullshit crazy at work and I haven't had chance to take a piss let alone get my much needed support here.
But the crave was bad today, so fuck work. I need this place. I needed to dive into the spreadsheet that I've completely neglected for the last 8 days. I needed to remind myself why this place keeps the bitch at bay. I hit the hall and thought it was a nice milestone - but I'm a realist. I know there are big battles still ahead. But I also thought I could hop on and hop off and I would be OK. My quit's been strong... going easy for a day or two on KTC won't hurt me. I've stopped posting support in other groups... becuase I can only get on and off. I've stopped reading HOFs and Intros... because I can only get on and off. I didn't realize today's was Dante's day until I posted. I should have known that before I logged on. I'm disappointed in myself for letting my committment to KTC slide. I'm disappointed that I let my committment to my quitheads slide. I'm still quit. 100% full on quit as a mother fucker quit. But I need this place.
Today was tough. Yesteday was tough. The weekend in Vermont was tough. I need this place. I need this place every fucking day.
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I need this place every fucking day.
Ditto.
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I need this place every fucking day.
Ditto.
True Dat!
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Per,
This site also needs you! You are HOF now and the newbies and others (like myself--half newbie) need your perspective. Everyone's quit is different and unique. Now is a good time to start and continue this daily journal (your intro) for others to follow your awesome story--the ups and downs. To gain wisdom from your perspective.
Proud to be quit with you!
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It's been a while. At least a month since I was really "here." My quit has gotten looser since I hit the hall. Check that - my quit has gotten looser since WDE hit the hall. He was the last of the Quitheads. Once the spreadsheet went away, so did I. I've been posting roll, but I haven't really "been here." I've actually missed roll a few times. I remember the first day distinctly. Early in the morning, when it was time to post roll, I was running late for work so I didn't have time. I figured I'd post roll when I got to work. Done it plenty of times before. No biggie. Then when I got there, I had meetings all morning. Before I knew it, it was time to catch my train... Got home, dinner, playing with the kids... the time just got away from me. I racked out. When I hit the pillow I realized I hadn't posted roll. I thought "fuck it, so I miss one day. So many other quitters miss a day here an there. Big deal." Here's the problem. It was a big deal. Three days later I missed roll again. It was so easy to just say "fuck it" again. And then again a week later.
Here's the problem, though. That attitude is the EXACT attitude that will get me back to dipping. It would be so easy to say "fuck it, one dip isn't that big a deal." Then three days later, say it again... then a week later say it again. That's the attitude that gets you back to the Hess mart buying two tins a day. I don't want to go back there. I won't go back there.
But here's another problem. The key tenet of this site is "post roll, repeat." But that's not enough. Not for me. I've done that for a month. I've hopped on, posted roll, and hopped off. Back again the next day - same routine. What the fuck is that? What does that do for me? Posting roll isn't enough. At least not for me. I need the energy that comes from new quitters. I need to reconnect with my Quitheads. I need to be really HERE for this site to work for me.
So that's what this post is about. Being here. I need to be here every day. Not just posting roll. But being here. My committment didn't end in August with the spreadsheet. My quit is eternal. But I cannot do it alone. I need this place. I need you. It's not about posting roll. My committment to you cannot end with "Per034 - Day XXX." Because that committment is weak. And that makes my quit weak. What makes my quit strong is helping other quitters get over their demons. And that's what I'm going to start doing. Again.
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It's been a while. At least a month since I was really "here." My quit has gotten looser since I hit the hall. Check that - my quit has gotten looser since WDE hit the hall. He was the last of the Quitheads. Once the spreadsheet went away, so did I. I've been posting roll, but I haven't really "been here." I've actually missed roll a few times. I remember the first day distinctly. Early in the morning, when it was time to post roll, I was running late for work so I didn't have time. I figured I'd post roll when I got to work. Done it plenty of times before. No biggie. Then when I got there, I had meetings all morning. Before I knew it, it was time to catch my train... Got home, dinner, playing with the kids... the time just got away from me. I racked out. When I hit the pillow I realized I hadn't posted roll. I thought "fuck it, so I miss one day. So many other quitters miss a day here an there. Big deal." Here's the problem. It was a big deal. Three days later I missed roll again. It was so easy to just say "fuck it" again. And then again a week later.
Here's the problem, though. That attitude is the EXACT attitude that will get me back to dipping. It would be so easy to say "fuck it, one dip isn't that big a deal." Then three days later, say it again... then a week later say it again. That's the attitude that gets you back to the Hess mart buying two tins a day. I don't want to go back there. I won't go back there.
But here's another problem. The key tenet of this site is "post roll, repeat." But that's not enough. Not for me. I've done that for a month. I've hopped on, posted roll, and hopped off. Back again the next day - same routine. What the fuck is that? What does that do for me? Posting roll isn't enough. At least not for me. I need the energy that comes from new quitters. I need to reconnect with my Quitheads. I need to be really HERE for this site to work for me.
So that's what this post is about. Being here. I need to be here every day. Not just posting roll. But being here. My committment didn't end in August with the spreadsheet. My quit is eternal. But I cannot do it alone. I need this place. I need you. It's not about posting roll. My committment to you cannot end with "Per034 - Day XXX." Because that committment is weak. And that makes my quit weak. What makes my quit strong is helping other quitters get over their demons. And that's what I'm going to start doing. Again.
Yes, you ave much to offer. Love it!
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It's been a while. At least a month since I was really "here." My quit has gotten looser since I hit the hall. Check that - my quit has gotten looser since WDE hit the hall. He was the last of the Quitheads. Once the spreadsheet went away, so did I. I've been posting roll, but I haven't really "been here." I've actually missed roll a few times. I remember the first day distinctly. Early in the morning, when it was time to post roll, I was running late for work so I didn't have time. I figured I'd post roll when I got to work. Done it plenty of times before. No biggie. Then when I got there, I had meetings all morning. Before I knew it, it was time to catch my train... Got home, dinner, playing with the kids... the time just got away from me. I racked out. When I hit the pillow I realized I hadn't posted roll. I thought "fuck it, so I miss one day. So many other quitters miss a day here an there. Big deal." Here's the problem. It was a big deal. Three days later I missed roll again. It was so easy to just say "fuck it" again. And then again a week later.
Here's the problem, though. That attitude is the EXACT attitude that will get me back to dipping. It would be so easy to say "fuck it, one dip isn't that big a deal." Then three days later, say it again... then a week later say it again. That's the attitude that gets you back to the Hess mart buying two tins a day. I don't want to go back there. I won't go back there.
But here's another problem. The key tenet of this site is "post roll, repeat." But that's not enough. Not for me. I've done that for a month. I've hopped on, posted roll, and hopped off. Back again the next day - same routine. What the fuck is that? What does that do for me? Posting roll isn't enough. At least not for me. I need the energy that comes from new quitters. I need to reconnect with my Quitheads. I need to be really HERE for this site to work for me.
So that's what this post is about. Being here. I need to be here every day. Not just posting roll. But being here. My committment didn't end in August with the spreadsheet. My quit is eternal. But I cannot do it alone. I need this place. I need you. It's not about posting roll. My committment to you cannot end with "Per034 - Day XXX." Because that committment is weak. And that makes my quit weak. What makes my quit strong is helping other quitters get over their demons. And that's what I'm going to start doing. Again.
nice post, per. i'm right there with you. let's get back in this game. i've been waiting for work to slow down, but it's not. i'm going to have to make even more of an effort, which for me is perfect. nothing worthwhile is easy.
see you tomorrow.
-
It's been a while. At least a month since I was really "here." My quit has gotten looser since I hit the hall. Check that - my quit has gotten looser since WDE hit the hall. He was the last of the Quitheads. Once the spreadsheet went away, so did I. I've been posting roll, but I haven't really "been here." I've actually missed roll a few times. I remember the first day distinctly. Early in the morning, when it was time to post roll, I was running late for work so I didn't have time. I figured I'd post roll when I got to work. Done it plenty of times before. No biggie. Then when I got there, I had meetings all morning. Before I knew it, it was time to catch my train... Got home, dinner, playing with the kids... the time just got away from me. I racked out. When I hit the pillow I realized I hadn't posted roll. I thought "fuck it, so I miss one day. So many other quitters miss a day here an there. Big deal." Here's the problem. It was a big deal. Three days later I missed roll again. It was so easy to just say "fuck it" again. And then again a week later.
Here's the problem, though. That attitude is the EXACT attitude that will get me back to dipping. It would be so easy to say "fuck it, one dip isn't that big a deal." Then three days later, say it again... then a week later say it again. That's the attitude that gets you back to the Hess mart buying two tins a day. I don't want to go back there. I won't go back there.
But here's another problem. The key tenet of this site is "post roll, repeat." But that's not enough. Not for me. I've done that for a month. I've hopped on, posted roll, and hopped off. Back again the next day - same routine. What the fuck is that? What does that do for me? Posting roll isn't enough. At least not for me. I need the energy that comes from new quitters. I need to reconnect with my Quitheads. I need to be really HERE for this site to work for me.
So that's what this post is about. Being here. I need to be here every day. Not just posting roll. But being here. My committment didn't end in August with the spreadsheet. My quit is eternal. But I cannot do it alone. I need this place. I need you. It's not about posting roll. My committment to you cannot end with "Per034 - Day XXX." Because that committment is weak. And that makes my quit weak. What makes my quit strong is helping other quitters get over their demons. And that's what I'm going to start doing. Again.
:D
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But here's another problem. The key tenet of this site is "post roll, repeat." But that's not enough. Not for me. I've done that for a month. I've hopped on, posted roll, and hopped off. Back again the next day - same routine. What the fuck is that? What does that do for me? Posting roll isn't enough. At least not for me. I need the energy that comes from new quitters. I need to reconnect with my Quitheads. I need to be really HERE for this site to work for me.
Right on Per. I feel exactly the same way on this point. Standing near the door of this place reminds me how bad the storm is out there when you're being beaten down by the nic bitch. That power of fresh quit is contagious.
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It's been a while. At least a month since I was really "here." My quit has gotten looser since I hit the hall. Check that - my quit has gotten looser since WDE hit the hall. He was the last of the Quitheads. Once the spreadsheet went away, so did I. I've been posting roll, but I haven't really "been here." I've actually missed roll a few times. I remember the first day distinctly. Early in the morning, when it was time to post roll, I was running late for work so I didn't have time. I figured I'd post roll when I got to work. Done it plenty of times before. No biggie. Then when I got there, I had meetings all morning. Before I knew it, it was time to catch my train... Got home, dinner, playing with the kids... the time just got away from me. I racked out. When I hit the pillow I realized I hadn't posted roll. I thought "fuck it, so I miss one day. So many other quitters miss a day here an there. Big deal." Here's the problem. It was a big deal. Three days later I missed roll again. It was so easy to just say "fuck it" again. And then again a week later.
Here's the problem, though. That attitude is the EXACT attitude that will get me back to dipping. It would be so easy to say "fuck it, one dip isn't that big a deal." Then three days later, say it again... then a week later say it again. That's the attitude that gets you back to the Hess mart buying two tins a day. I don't want to go back there. I won't go back there.
But here's another problem. The key tenet of this site is "post roll, repeat." But that's not enough. Not for me. I've done that for a month. I've hopped on, posted roll, and hopped off. Back again the next day - same routine. What the fuck is that? What does that do for me? Posting roll isn't enough. At least not for me. I need the energy that comes from new quitters. I need to reconnect with my Quitheads. I need to be really HERE for this site to work for me.
So that's what this post is about. Being here. I need to be here every day. Not just posting roll. But being here. My committment didn't end in August with the spreadsheet. My quit is eternal. But I cannot do it alone. I need this place. I need you. It's not about posting roll. My committment to you cannot end with "Per034 - Day XXX." Because that committment is weak. And that makes my quit weak. What makes my quit strong is helping other quitters get over their demons. And that's what I'm going to start doing. Again.
I have read this post more than once, and I have learned from it.
I am glad you have come to this conclusion because this site is a better place with you involved. You gave some of the best advice I have received (and that is saying a lot around here) You have helped me a lot and I am glad you will be here to help others.
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Dear Quit,
You are a fucking joke. You are full of complacency. You are arrogant and self-righteous. I used to love you. You were my best friend. Now you're like that guy in the John Cusack movies that nobody likes. You think your shit don't stink and nothing can ever stop you.
The problem with those Cusack movies is that the douchebag always loses in the end. This post is a warning to you, my quit. Stop being a douchebag. You used to be cool. You used to be humble. You used to care about yourself and take pride in what you did every day. Now you're arrogant. You come and go as you please with no real committment to anything. You're a disappointment.
I stumbled across an article today about CU banning dip on campus and it made me think of you. What happened to us? We were so good together. Now you think your too cool for anyone. I went back and read this entire intro - from beginning to end. Goddam I was proud of you. I cried - ACTUALLY CRIED - as I read this intro today. I cried because of all the amazing support you received along the way. I also cried, I think, because I feel like you're dying. Dying of a disease called compacency. You tried to stop it in October, but nothing ever came of it.
Please, Quit, remember where you came from. Stop being arrogant. Just because you made it this far doesn't mean you'll make it until tomorrow. I still love you, quit. But I loved you a lot more when I thought you loved yourself.
Pat.
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Dear Quit,
You are a fucking joke. You are full of complacency. You are arrogant and self-righteous. I used to love you. You were my best friend. Now you're like that guy in the John Cusack movies that nobody likes. You think your shit don't stink and nothing can ever stop you.
The problem with those Cusack movies is that the douchebag always loses in the end. This post is a warning to you, my quit. Stop being a douchebag. You used to be cool. You used to be humble. You used to care about yourself and take pride in what you did every day. Now you're arrogant. You come and go as you please with no real committment to anything. You're a disappointment.
I stumbled across an article today about CU banning dip on campus and it made me think of you. What happened to us? We were so good together. Now you think your too cool for anyone. I went back and read this entire intro - from beginning to end. Goddam I was proud of you. I cried - ACTUALLY CRIED - as I read this intro today. I cried because of all the amazing support you received along the way. I also cried, I think, because I feel like you're dying. Dying of a disease called compacency. You tried to stop it in October, but nothing ever came of it.
Please, Quit, remember where you came from. Stop being arrogant. Just because you made it this far doesn't mean you'll make it until tomorrow. I still love you, quit. But I loved you a lot more when I thought you loved yourself.
Pat.
Find the balance friend. It is there.
You can do this.
-
I quit with Per today.
Without John Cusack, the world would have never known Joan. Ying and Yang my friend. Ying and Yang.
-
Dear Quit,
You are a fucking joke. You are full of complacency. You are arrogant and self-righteous. I used to love you. You were my best friend. Now you're like that guy in the John Cusack movies that nobody likes. You think your shit don't stink and nothing can ever stop you.
The problem with those Cusack movies is that the douchebag always loses in the end. This post is a warning to you, my quit. Stop being a douchebag. You used to be cool. You used to be humble. You used to care about yourself and take pride in what you did every day. Now you're arrogant. You come and go as you please with no real committment to anything. You're a disappointment.
I stumbled across an article today about CU banning dip on campus and it made me think of you. What happened to us? We were so good together. Now you think your too cool for anyone. I went back and read this entire intro - from beginning to end. Goddam I was proud of you. I cried - ACTUALLY CRIED - as I read this intro today. I cried because of all the amazing support you received along the way. I also cried, I think, because I feel like you're dying. Dying of a disease called compacency. You tried to stop it in October, but nothing ever came of it.
Please, Quit, remember where you came from. Stop being arrogant. Just because you made it this far doesn't mean you'll make it until tomorrow. I still love you, quit. But I loved you a lot more when I thought you loved yourself.
Pat.
Find the balance friend. It is there.
You can do this.
If your quit needs anymore inspiration make him go read the advice you guys gave me in my Intro thread. You and your quit helped save my life. I have every confidence you will get your quit right back where you want it.
I am proud to quit with you today.
-
An epic year my friend.
Congratulations.
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An epic year my friend.
Congratulations.
:D
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I am a failure. I've failed myself, my loved ones, and my quit brothers and sisters. I am ashamed of what I've done and there is no excuse for my betrayal - because that's what it is, a betrayal. I've betrayed the trust of the good people on this site - people who gave me support and guidance and incredible insight. I will never be able to make up for what I've done. I know that there's a shit storm coming, and I deserve to be standing in the middle of it without an umbrella.
My story is no different than any other failed quit. I had it licked. It was gone. I was master of my own destiny. I didn't need this place anymore. Coming here made me think of it every day, so I stopped coming here. And that's when my failure started. My quit failed on June 10, 2012. I remember the date distinctly. There was no reason. I drove past my usual pusher and instead of continuing to drive by like I had done for 14 months prior, I stopped. I can have one dip. I wasn't addicted anymore. So I bought a tin. And that first dip - well, I'm ashamed to say it was great. But the second one wasn't. It took me three days to get through that can. None of those dips were satisfying save the first. Then I bought another one. then another. before I knew it, within a week, I was back to a can a day. For the past week it's been bad.
No apology from me will ever make up for this betrayal, but understand that I am very sorry for letting you all down. I dipped this morning, so today will not be day one. My day one will start tomorrow.
Invariably, the question will be "how will this be different?" And my answer is not profound - this time it will be different because I say it will. I will use the tools on this site and lean on the expertise available here. I know how and why the program works and I know where and how I failed. Complacency got the best of me. My sin is arrogance. It won't happen again. I know those are hollow words from a cowardly man, but I will not let this take over my life yet again.
Please forgive me. Give me what I deserve. I may be a coward, but I'm man enough to take my medicine.
I'm sorry Dante, DChogs, KTK, Closer, LL, Nico, Dforbes, Parry, Sayrah and all of the Quitheads.
-
I am a failure. I've failed myself, my loved ones, and my quit brothers and sisters. I am ashamed of what I've done and there is no excuse for my betrayal - because that's what it is, a betrayal. I've betrayed the trust of the good people on this site - people who gave me support and guidance and incredible insight. I will never be able to make up for what I've done. I know that there's a shit storm coming, and I deserve to be standing in the middle of it without an umbrella.
My story is no different than any other failed quit. I had it licked. It was gone. I was master of my own destiny. I didn't need this place anymore. Coming here made me think of it every day, so I stopped coming here. And that's when my failure started. My quit failed on June 10, 2012. I remember the date distinctly. There was no reason. I drove past my usual pusher and instead of continuing to drive by like I had done for 14 months prior, I stopped. I can have one dip. I wasn't addicted anymore. So I bought a tin. And that first dip - well, I'm ashamed to say it was great. But the second one wasn't. It took me three days to get through that can. None of those dips were satisfying save the first. Then I bought another one. then another. before I knew it, within a week, I was back to a can a day. For the past week it's been bad.
No apology from me will ever make up for this betrayal, but understand that I am very sorry for letting you all down. I dipped this morning, so today will not be day one. My day one will start tomorrow.
Invariably, the question will be "how will this be different?" And my answer is not profound - this time it will be different because I say it will. I will use the tools on this site and lean on the expertise available here. I know how and why the program works and I know where and how I failed. Complacency got the best of me. My sin is arrogance. It won't happen again. I know those are hollow words from a cowardly man, but I will not let this take over my life yet again.
Please forgive me. Give me what I deserve. I may be a coward, but I'm man enough to take my medicine.
I'm sorry Dante, DChogs, KTK, Closer, LL, Nico, Dforbes, Parry, Sayrah and all of the Quitheads.
I've been an on and off closet dipper for 10 years. I honestly can't stand it anymore. I'm up to 2 cans a day and my gums are so cut it it's pathetic. I've decided that I'm going to quit tomorrow. I've done this once or twice before and i've hated it every time. I'm at that terrible place where I can't stand dipping anymore, but I don't want to quit either. Anyhow, I know that I have to, and I'm going to, but I'm going to need your help because they only times in the past I was successful and lasted a long time (over a year) off the can was when i used these forums. Anyhow, I'm packing my gums full of the crap today in order to say "goodbye" so that I can begin this journey again tomorrow. Please wish me luck and be there for me when I'm going nuts. Thanks.
You're only a failure if you completely give up! I am 18 days quit today.. Post roll and join up again.. this is what support is suppose to be about.. helping each other out in the heat of the battle.. NOT FUCKING SHOOTING OUR OWN FUCKING BROTHERS WHEN THEY ARE WOUNDED AND DOWN!!! I AM SICK AND FUCKING TIRED OF ALL THESE FUCKING COCKSUCKER ASSHOLES FIRING ON BROTHERS WHEN THEY ARE HAVING A BAD FUCKING DAY!!! WE ARE ALL FUCKING ADDICTS HERE NO ONE IS BETTER THAN THE OTHER.. WE ARE ALL ONE FUCKING STOP AWAY FROM FULL BLOWN ADDICTION AGAIN!!! If I catch backlash with you man... fuck it.. i quit with you pal... day 1 for you is better than giving up.. I don't know you.. but i love you and i quit with you!!! Gooch
-
I am a failure. I've failed myself, my loved ones, and my quit brothers and sisters. I am ashamed of what I've done and there is no excuse for my betrayal - because that's what it is, a betrayal. I've betrayed the trust of the good people on this site - people who gave me support and guidance and incredible insight. I will never be able to make up for what I've done. I know that there's a shit storm coming, and I deserve to be standing in the middle of it without an umbrella.
My story is no different than any other failed quit. I had it licked. It was gone. I was master of my own destiny. I didn't need this place anymore. Coming here made me think of it every day, so I stopped coming here. And that's when my failure started. My quit failed on June 10, 2012. I remember the date distinctly. There was no reason. I drove past my usual pusher and instead of continuing to drive by like I had done for 14 months prior, I stopped. I can have one dip. I wasn't addicted anymore. So I bought a tin. And that first dip - well, I'm ashamed to say it was great. But the second one wasn't. It took me three days to get through that can. None of those dips were satisfying save the first. Then I bought another one. then another. before I knew it, within a week, I was back to a can a day. For the past week it's been bad.
No apology from me will ever make up for this betrayal, but understand that I am very sorry for letting you all down. I dipped this morning, so today will not be day one. My day one will start tomorrow.
Invariably, the question will be "how will this be different?" And my answer is not profound - this time it will be different because I say it will. I will use the tools on this site and lean on the expertise available here. I know how and why the program works and I know where and how I failed. Complacency got the best of me. My sin is arrogance. It won't happen again. I know those are hollow words from a cowardly man, but I will not let this take over my life yet again.
Please forgive me. Give me what I deserve. I may be a coward, but I'm man enough to take my medicine.
I'm sorry Dante, DChogs, KTK, Closer, LL, Nico, Dforbes, Parry, Sayrah and all of the Quitheads.
Damn man.
My first few months here, I considered you one of the stronger quiters of this site. You shared a lot of wisdom; I have reread this thread multiple times. Hell I had one of your quotes in my signature for over 200 days. I just dont understand how you could turn your back on this site. Not everyone understands and fully grasp the concepts of KTC. Reading this thread, it sure felt like you "got it". How you could walk away from this site so quickly baffles me and how you forgot everything so quickly is mindblowing.
I think I get most cavers. They came to this site and they went through the motions, but they never truely grasped the core principals of KTC. But not you. You saw how powerful this site. You knew what it took to be a successful quitter. And you turned your back on KTC.
Shame on you.
-
I am a failure. I've failed myself, my loved ones, and my quit brothers and sisters. I am ashamed of what I've done and there is no excuse for my betrayal - because that's what it is, a betrayal. I've betrayed the trust of the good people on this site - people who gave me support and guidance and incredible insight. I will never be able to make up for what I've done. I know that there's a shit storm coming, and I deserve to be standing in the middle of it without an umbrella.
My story is no different than any other failed quit. I had it licked. It was gone. I was master of my own destiny. I didn't need this place anymore. Coming here made me think of it every day, so I stopped coming here. And that's when my failure started. My quit failed on June 10, 2012. I remember the date distinctly. There was no reason. I drove past my usual pusher and instead of continuing to drive by like I had done for 14 months prior, I stopped. I can have one dip. I wasn't addicted anymore. So I bought a tin. And that first dip - well, I'm ashamed to say it was great. But the second one wasn't. It took me three days to get through that can. None of those dips were satisfying save the first. Then I bought another one. then another. before I knew it, within a week, I was back to a can a day. For the past week it's been bad.
No apology from me will ever make up for this betrayal, but understand that I am very sorry for letting you all down. I dipped this morning, so today will not be day one. My day one will start tomorrow.
Invariably, the question will be "how will this be different?" And my answer is not profound - this time it will be different because I say it will. I will use the tools on this site and lean on the expertise available here. I know how and why the program works and I know where and how I failed. Complacency got the best of me. My sin is arrogance. It won't happen again. I know those are hollow words from a cowardly man, but I will not let this take over my life yet again.
Please forgive me. Give me what I deserve. I may be a coward, but I'm man enough to take my medicine.
I'm sorry Dante, DChogs, KTK, Closer, LL, Nico, Dforbes, Parry, Sayrah and all of the Quitheads.
I've been an on and off closet dipper for 10 years. I honestly can't stand it anymore. I'm up to 2 cans a day and my gums are so cut it it's pathetic. I've decided that I'm going to quit tomorrow. I've done this once or twice before and i've hated it every time. I'm at that terrible place where I can't stand dipping anymore, but I don't want to quit either. Anyhow, I know that I have to, and I'm going to, but I'm going to need your help because they only times in the past I was successful and lasted a long time (over a year) off the can was when i used these forums. Anyhow, I'm packing my gums full of the crap today in order to say "goodbye" so that I can begin this journey again tomorrow. Please wish me luck and be there for me when I'm going nuts. Thanks.
You're only a failure if you completely give up! I am 18 days quit today.. Post roll and join up again.. this is what support is suppose to be about.. helping each other out in the heat of the battle.. NOT FUCKING SHOOTING OUR OWN FUCKING BROTHERS WHEN THEY ARE WOUNDED AND DOWN!!! I AM SICK AND FUCKING TIRED OF ALL THESE FUCKING COCKSUCKER ASSHOLES FIRING ON BROTHERS WHEN THEY ARE HAVING A BAD FUCKING DAY!!! WE ARE ALL FUCKING ADDICTS HERE NO ONE IS BETTER THAN THE OTHER.. WE ARE ALL ONE FUCKING STOP AWAY FROM FULL BLOWN ADDICTION AGAIN!!! If I catch backlash with you man... fuck it.. i quit with you pal... day 1 for you is better than giving up.. I don't know you.. but i love you and i quit with you!!! Gooch
Per,
Your story is so familar. I have seen it hundreds of times here. You know this is not a game, it is a fight for your life. If you learned nothing else here you should have learned the power of posting roll. A year plus tossed away... for what? I am glad you are back, it takes balls to come back and get your ass kicked which tells me you really do want to quit. Now lets see what you have....
Gooch,
I like your passion, a little mis-directed but I like it anyway. You have to understand there is no acceptable reason to cave. None, nothing, nada, EVER. People get ripped and so they should. Other quitters get pissed and so they should. Nobody forced any of the cavers to do what they did. It was a choice they made; A choice to piss on the word they gave their brothers and the other people fighting this addiction daily.
We are all addicts and on that we can both agree. Where we will have to disagree is when you say people who keep their word are no better than those that don't.
STAY QUIT
Greg
-
I am a failure. I've failed myself, my loved ones, and my quit brothers and sisters. I am ashamed of what I've done and there is no excuse for my betrayal - because that's what it is, a betrayal. I've betrayed the trust of the good people on this site - people who gave me support and guidance and incredible insight. I will never be able to make up for what I've done. I know that there's a shit storm coming, and I deserve to be standing in the middle of it without an umbrella.
My story is no different than any other failed quit. I had it licked. It was gone. I was master of my own destiny. I didn't need this place anymore. Coming here made me think of it every day, so I stopped coming here. And that's when my failure started. My quit failed on June 10, 2012. I remember the date distinctly. There was no reason. I drove past my usual pusher and instead of continuing to drive by like I had done for 14 months prior, I stopped. I can have one dip. I wasn't addicted anymore. So I bought a tin. And that first dip - well, I'm ashamed to say it was great. But the second one wasn't. It took me three days to get through that can. None of those dips were satisfying save the first. Then I bought another one. then another. before I knew it, within a week, I was back to a can a day. For the past week it's been bad.
No apology from me will ever make up for this betrayal, but understand that I am very sorry for letting you all down. I dipped this morning, so today will not be day one. My day one will start tomorrow.
Invariably, the question will be "how will this be different?" And my answer is not profound - this time it will be different because I say it will. I will use the tools on this site and lean on the expertise available here. I know how and why the program works and I know where and how I failed. Complacency got the best of me. My sin is arrogance. It won't happen again. I know those are hollow words from a cowardly man, but I will not let this take over my life yet again.
Please forgive me. Give me what I deserve. I may be a coward, but I'm man enough to take my medicine.
I'm sorry Dante, DChogs, KTK, Closer, LL, Nico, Dforbes, Parry, Sayrah and all of the Quitheads.
Damn man.
My first few months here, I considered you one of the stronger quiters of this site. You shared a lot of wisdom; I have reread this thread multiple times. Hell I had one of your quotes in my signature for over 200 days. I just dont understand how you could turn your back on this site. Not everyone understands and fully grasp the concepts of KTC. Reading this thread, it sure felt like you "got it". How you could walk away from this site so quickly baffles me and how you forgot everything so quickly is mindblowing.
I think I get most cavers. They came to this site and they went through the motions, but they never truely grasped the core principals of KTC. But not you. You saw how powerful this site. You knew what it took to be a successful quitter. And you turned your back on KTC.
Shame on you.
You're right. I got this site. I was here. I was hardcore. I was a douchebag to cavers. And now I'm one of them. Shame on me indeed. I've been reading my own intro thread for the past hour now and I have such incredible shame for turning my back on all the beliefs and feelings I've had. I will get back to that point. The worst part of this cave is that I know I had an impact on other people's quits, and now I return with my tail between my legs and everything I posted means dick. I made all those quits weaker with my selfish act. I didn't think of other quitters with my actions. But I still believe it all. I will go back to the person I was. I'm sorry. Sorry doesn't mean shit - but I am sorry.
-
I am a failure. I've failed myself, my loved ones, and my quit brothers and sisters. I am ashamed of what I've done and there is no excuse for my betrayal - because that's what it is, a betrayal. I've betrayed the trust of the good people on this site - people who gave me support and guidance and incredible insight. I will never be able to make up for what I've done. I know that there's a shit storm coming, and I deserve to be standing in the middle of it without an umbrella.
My story is no different than any other failed quit. I had it licked. It was gone. I was master of my own destiny. I didn't need this place anymore. Coming here made me think of it every day, so I stopped coming here. And that's when my failure started. My quit failed on June 10, 2012. I remember the date distinctly. There was no reason. I drove past my usual pusher and instead of continuing to drive by like I had done for 14 months prior, I stopped. I can have one dip. I wasn't addicted anymore. So I bought a tin. And that first dip - well, I'm ashamed to say it was great. But the second one wasn't. It took me three days to get through that can. None of those dips were satisfying save the first. Then I bought another one. then another. before I knew it, within a week, I was back to a can a day. For the past week it's been bad.
No apology from me will ever make up for this betrayal, but understand that I am very sorry for letting you all down. I dipped this morning, so today will not be day one. My day one will start tomorrow.
Invariably, the question will be "how will this be different?" And my answer is not profound - this time it will be different because I say it will. I will use the tools on this site and lean on the expertise available here. I know how and why the program works and I know where and how I failed. Complacency got the best of me. My sin is arrogance. It won't happen again. I know those are hollow words from a cowardly man, but I will not let this take over my life yet again.
Please forgive me. Give me what I deserve. I may be a coward, but I'm man enough to take my medicine.
I'm sorry Dante, DChogs, KTK, Closer, LL, Nico, Dforbes, Parry, Sayrah and all of the Quitheads.
Fuckin pathetic
"My promise is stronger then my addiction" so maybe It's safe enough to say you drifted? So maybe you add that to what you should do differently. Or maybe tryin growing some balls and not buying a Fuckin can next time. Maybe you try using the tools ktc taught you when you feel weak. Maybe you understand that caving isn't an option, losing isn't somethin we condone here brother. So maybe you try that "what I'm doin differently"....well, differently
-
Or we can start with posting day 1 in October
-
I am a failure. I've failed myself, my loved ones, and my quit brothers and sisters. I am ashamed of what I've done and there is no excuse for my betrayal - because that's what it is, a betrayal. I've betrayed the trust of the good people on this site - people who gave me support and guidance and incredible insight. I will never be able to make up for what I've done. I know that there's a shit storm coming, and I deserve to be standing in the middle of it without an umbrella.
My story is no different than any other failed quit. I had it licked. It was gone. I was master of my own destiny. I didn't need this place anymore. Coming here made me think of it every day, so I stopped coming here. And that's when my failure started. My quit failed on June 10, 2012. I remember the date distinctly. There was no reason. I drove past my usual pusher and instead of continuing to drive by like I had done for 14 months prior, I stopped. I can have one dip. I wasn't addicted anymore. So I bought a tin. And that first dip - well, I'm ashamed to say it was great. But the second one wasn't. It took me three days to get through that can. None of those dips were satisfying save the first. Then I bought another one. then another. before I knew it, within a week, I was back to a can a day. For the past week it's been bad.
No apology from me will ever make up for this betrayal, but understand that I am very sorry for letting you all down. I dipped this morning, so today will not be day one. My day one will start tomorrow.
Invariably, the question will be "how will this be different?" And my answer is not profound - this time it will be different because I say it will. I will use the tools on this site and lean on the expertise available here. I know how and why the program works and I know where and how I failed. Complacency got the best of me. My sin is arrogance. It won't happen again. I know those are hollow words from a cowardly man, but I will not let this take over my life yet again.
Please forgive me. Give me what I deserve. I may be a coward, but I'm man enough to take my medicine.
I'm sorry Dante, DChogs, KTK, Closer, LL, Nico, Dforbes, Parry, Sayrah and all of the Quitheads.
Fuckin pathetic
"My promise is stronger then my addiction" so maybe It's safe enough to say you drifted? So maybe you add that to what you should do differently. Or maybe tryin growing some balls and not buying a Fuckin can next time. Maybe you try using the tools ktc taught you when you feel weak. Maybe you understand that caving isn't an option, losing isn't somethin we condone here brother. So maybe you try that "what I'm doin differently"....well, differently
You're right Bruce. I'm fucking pathetic and I have no balls. I will post day 1 tomororw.
And I thought I deleted that tagline before I posted. I will delete it now because I know that it's disrpectful to everything this site stands for. I never would have intentionally left that there.
-
Or we can start with posting day 1 in October
Agreed, where is your day 1 at? Or you getting one last fix in now?
Come on Per you know the drill.
"Your plan to quit is as realistic as my plan to win the lottery". Does that sound familiar?
-
I am a failure. I've failed myself, my loved ones, and my quit brothers and sisters. I am ashamed of what I've done and there is no excuse for my betrayal - because that's what it is, a betrayal. I've betrayed the trust of the good people on this site - people who gave me support and guidance and incredible insight. I will never be able to make up for what I've done. I know that there's a shit storm coming, and I deserve to be standing in the middle of it without an umbrella.
My story is no different than any other failed quit. I had it licked. It was gone. I was master of my own destiny. I didn't need this place anymore. Coming here made me think of it every day, so I stopped coming here. And that's when my failure started. My quit failed on June 10, 2012. I remember the date distinctly. There was no reason. I drove past my usual pusher and instead of continuing to drive by like I had done for 14 months prior, I stopped. I can have one dip. I wasn't addicted anymore. So I bought a tin. And that first dip - well, I'm ashamed to say it was great. But the second one wasn't. It took me three days to get through that can. None of those dips were satisfying save the first. Then I bought another one. then another. before I knew it, within a week, I was back to a can a day. For the past week it's been bad.
No apology from me will ever make up for this betrayal, but understand that I am very sorry for letting you all down. I dipped this morning, so today will not be day one. My day one will start tomorrow.
Invariably, the question will be "how will this be different?" And my answer is not profound - this time it will be different because I say it will. I will use the tools on this site and lean on the expertise available here. I know how and why the program works and I know where and how I failed. Complacency got the best of me. My sin is arrogance. It won't happen again. I know those are hollow words from a cowardly man, but I will not let this take over my life yet again.
Please forgive me. Give me what I deserve. I may be a coward, but I'm man enough to take my medicine.
I'm sorry Dante, DChogs, KTK, Closer, LL, Nico, Dforbes, Parry, Sayrah and all of the Quitheads.
I've been an on and off closet dipper for 10 years. I honestly can't stand it anymore. I'm up to 2 cans a day and my gums are so cut it it's pathetic. I've decided that I'm going to quit tomorrow. I've done this once or twice before and i've hated it every time. I'm at that terrible place where I can't stand dipping anymore, but I don't want to quit either. Anyhow, I know that I have to, and I'm going to, but I'm going to need your help because they only times in the past I was successful and lasted a long time (over a year) off the can was when i used these forums. Anyhow, I'm packing my gums full of the crap today in order to say "goodbye" so that I can begin this journey again tomorrow. Please wish me luck and be there for me when I'm going nuts. Thanks.
You're only a failure if you completely give up! I am 18 days quit today.. Post roll and join up again.. this is what support is suppose to be about.. helping each other out in the heat of the battle.. NOT FUCKING SHOOTING OUR OWN FUCKING BROTHERS WHEN THEY ARE WOUNDED AND DOWN!!! I AM SICK AND FUCKING TIRED OF ALL THESE FUCKING COCKSUCKER ASSHOLES FIRING ON BROTHERS WHEN THEY ARE HAVING A BAD FUCKING DAY!!! WE ARE ALL FUCKING ADDICTS HERE NO ONE IS BETTER THAN THE OTHER.. WE ARE ALL ONE FUCKING STOP AWAY FROM FULL BLOWN ADDICTION AGAIN!!! If I catch backlash with you man... fuck it.. i quit with you pal... day 1 for you is better than giving up.. I don't know you.. but i love you and i quit with you!!! Gooch
Per,
Your story is so familar. I have seen it hundreds of times here. You know this is not a game, it is a fight for your life. If you learned nothing else here you should have learned the power of posting roll. A year plus tossed away... for what? I am glad you are back, it takes balls to come back and get your ass kicked which tells me you really do want to quit. Now lets see what you have....
Gooch,
I like your passion, a little mis-directed but I like it anyway. You have to understand there is no acceptable reason to cave. None, nothing, nada, EVER. People get ripped and so they should. Other quitters get pissed and so they should. Nobody forced any of the cavers to do what they did. It was a choice they made; A choice to piss on the word they gave their brothers and the other people fighting this addiction daily.
We are all addicts and on that we can both agree. Where we will have to disagree is when you say people who keep their word are no better than those that don't.
STAY QUIT
Greg
It was tossed away for nothing. For a spur of the moment decision that I'd avoided for so long. I'm sorry I let you down. And I agree - I appreciate Gooch's sentiment, but it's not something I agree with. I would have been the first to shout down a caver and I don't believe I deserve any different treatment. This site needs people like Gooch to keep it level. Thanks to you both.
-
Or we can start with posting day 1 in October
Agreed, where is your day 1 at? Or you getting one last fix in now?
Come on Per you know the drill.
"Your plan to quit is as realistic as my plan to win the lottery". Does that sound familiar?
I am quit right now, but I won't disrespect this site by posting day one on a day that I've dipped. I dipped this morning. I never understood how you could dip in the morning and post Day 1 in the afternoon. I want to keep this clean.
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God dammit Per. God fucking dammit.
You know this place. You know what is here. How the fucking christ can you ignore the folks around you? How the hell did you not ask any of those steel balled fuckers in your group for help? Did you send a text? Did you send a message? Did you ask anyone for help? Do you want this? You know how I work. Say that shit out loud. "I QUIT". Do you believe it when you say it? I need to hear some fucking resolve.
-
Or we can start with posting day 1 in October
Agreed, where is your day 1 at? Or you getting one last fix in now?
Come on Per you know the drill.
"Your plan to quit is as realistic as my plan to win the lottery". Does that sound familiar?
I am quit right now, but I won't disrespect this site by posting day one on a day that I've dipped. I dipped this morning. I never understood how you could dip in the morning and post Day 1 in the afternoon. I want to keep this clean.
If you quit you have actually won the lottery! You can not buy freedom like that! It is priceless.. Quit On! Gooch
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God dammit Per. God fucking dammit.
You know this place. You know what is here. How the fucking christ can you ignore the folks around you? How the hell did you not ask any of those steel balled fuckers in your group for help? Did you send a text? Did you send a message? Did you ask anyone for help? Do you want this? You know how I work. Say that shit out loud. "I QUIT". Do you believe it when you say it? I need to hear some fucking resolve.
I love you guys and your passion.. I swear i do.. There is classic Quit all over the above statement...Thanks Souliman! Internalize all that Girls!
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God dammit Per. God fucking dammit.
You know this place. You know what is here. How the fucking christ can you ignore the folks around you? How the hell did you not ask any of those steel balled fuckers in your group for help? Did you send a text? Did you send a message? Did you ask anyone for help? Do you want this? You know how I work. Say that shit out loud. "I QUIT". Do you believe it when you say it? I need to hear some fucking resolve.
i quit soul. i quit. i didn't reach out because it was one. i thought it would be one and done. and then once it was one, it was already done. it was impossible to reach out. i'd already failed. i'd already disrespected my brothers and sisters. i couldn't reach out. it was too late. i know how this works. i was - at one point in my life - a bamf. i'm not anymore. now i'm just a newbie. the hardest part about posting my failure was not the shit storm that was coming. the hardest part was the disappointment i knew folks like you would feel. i let you down. no matter that this quit will last forever, i will never be able to change the fact that i let you down. resolve? my failure informs my resolve. in the past i've made the point that what motivates me is fear of disappointment - not my own, but disappointing others. now i have to deal with that. and it is a harsh reality. knowing the disappointment that i've caused others makes my resolve so much stronger. today is not a good day because i dipped today. tomorrow will be a great day because it will be a day free of dip.
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Per you know I am going to sound like a broken record but if you dont get anything but this Listen to me now. ITS NOT A FUCKEN PRINGLES CHIP AND U CANT HAVE JUST ONE. I have been around awhile and I have seen dozens and dozens of people leave think they feel great dont need to post. I have this beat. Bullshit you are an addict like everyone else. Get your ass back on the quit train
Luke
You just made my quit that more badass. People who cave make me realize how serious this shit is. Thats why I am still her and will continue to be here.
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Per you know I am going to sound like a broken record but if you dont get anything but this Listen to me now. ITS NOT A FUCKEN PRINGLES CHIP AND U CANT HAVE JUST ONE. I have been around awhile and I have seen dozens and dozens of people leave think they feel great dont need to post. I have this beat. Bullshit you are an addict like everyone else. Get your ass back on the quit train
Luke
You just made my quit that more badass. People who cave make me realize how serious this shit is. Thats why I am still her and will continue to be here.
i know. i fell into the trap that i warned so many other people about. i will recover. i take some solace in knowing that my cave strengthened your quit. and you're right - if you make it a year you should be done, right? nope. and if you're at a year, take this as a cautionary tale. the battle never ends. and i lost. and i'm a broken man because of it.
-
Or we can start with posting day 1 in October
Agreed, where is your day 1 at? Or you getting one last fix in now?
Come on Per you know the drill.
"Your plan to quit is as realistic as my plan to win the lottery". Does that sound familiar?
I am quit right now, but I won't disrespect this site by posting day one on a day that I've dipped. I dipped this morning. I never understood how you could dip in the morning and post Day 1 in the afternoon. I want to keep this clean.
If you see it that way, you've taken it one step further by posting your bullshit "I'll be back tomorrow" in August '11.
Don't want to disrespect this site....give me a fucking break.
-
Per you know I am going to sound like a broken record but if you dont get anything but this Listen to me now. ITS NOT A FUCKEN PRINGLES CHIP AND U CANT HAVE JUST ONE. I have been around awhile and I have seen dozens and dozens of people leave think they feel great dont need to post. I have this beat. Bullshit you are an addict like everyone else. Get your ass back on the quit train
Luke
You just made my quit that more badass. People who cave make me realize how serious this shit is. Thats why I am still her and will continue to be here.
i know. i fell into the trap that i warned so many other people about. i will recover. i take some solace in knowing that my cave strengthened your quit. and you're right - if you make it a year you should be done, right? nope. and if you're at a year, take this as a cautionary tale. the battle never ends. and i lost. and i'm a broken man because of it.
(1) What happened?
(2) Why did it happen?
(3) What are you doing differently this time?
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Per you know I am going to sound like a broken record but if you dont get anything but this Listen to me now. ITS NOT A FUCKEN PRINGLES CHIP AND U CANT HAVE JUST ONE. I have been around awhile and I have seen dozens and dozens of people leave think they feel great dont need to post. I have this beat. Bullshit you are an addict like everyone else. Get your ass back on the quit train
Luke
You just made my quit that more badass. People who cave make me realize how serious this shit is. Thats why I am still her and will continue to be here.
i know. i fell into the trap that i warned so many other people about. i will recover. i take some solace in knowing that my cave strengthened your quit. and you're right - if you make it a year you should be done, right? nope. and if you're at a year, take this as a cautionary tale. the battle never ends. and i lost. and i'm a broken man because of it.
I have seen people cave at over 1,000. They forgot what got them to that place as did you. We are addicts, always will be the day you forget that you are doomed.
Remember what you are feeling today, sucks I am sure, never forget this feeling.
STAY QUIT
Greg
-
Or we can start with posting day 1 in October
Agreed, where is your day 1 at? Or you getting one last fix in now?
Come on Per you know the drill.
"Your plan to quit is as realistic as my plan to win the lottery". Does that sound familiar?
I am quit right now, but I won't disrespect this site by posting day one on a day that I've dipped. I dipped this morning. I never understood how you could dip in the morning and post Day 1 in the afternoon. I want to keep this clean.
If you see it that way, you've taken it one step further by posting your bullshit "I'll be back tomorrow" in August '11.
Don't want to disrespect this site....give me a fucking break.
i would never disrespect this site and if you feel that i am, please tell me what i need to do to fix that. if you want me to post day zero in october right now, i will do that. but i will not post a day one for june 28. i dipped today. today does not count. i left. i'm a douchebag caver. i deserve all the vitriol. i deserve the anger and disrespect i am due. but i know what this site means and how it works. i will not post a day one on a day that i dipped. that may be fine for people new to the site to get them on board. but i'm not new. i'll post my day one in 61 minutes.
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Or we can start with posting day 1 in October
Agreed, where is your day 1 at? Or you getting one last fix in now?
Come on Per you know the drill.
"Your plan to quit is as realistic as my plan to win the lottery". Does that sound familiar?
I am quit right now, but I won't disrespect this site by posting day one on a day that I've dipped. I dipped this morning. I never understood how you could dip in the morning and post Day 1 in the afternoon. I want to keep this clean.
If you see it that way, you've taken it one step further by posting your bullshit "I'll be back tomorrow" in August '11.
Don't want to disrespect this site....give me a fucking break.
i would never disrespect this site and if you feel that i am, please tell me what i need to do to fix that. if you want me to post day zero in october right now, i will do that. but i will not post a day one for june 28. i dipped today. today does not count. i left. i'm a douchebag caver. i deserve all the vitriol. i deserve the anger and disrespect i am due. but i know what this site means and how it works. i will not post a day one on a day that i dipped. that may be fine for people new to the site to get them on board. but i'm not new. i'll post my day one in 61 minutes.
Then you know that posting on the boards without a roll call is forbidden.
Post roll or keep it here.
(By the way, the day that you decide to quit is day 1. Yup, you used this morning. But you also tossed it--unless you didn't. It's day 1.)
You know that day 0 is bullshit.
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Per you know I am going to sound like a broken record but if you dont get anything but this Listen to me now. ITS NOT A FUCKEN PRINGLES CHIP AND U CANT HAVE JUST ONE. I have been around awhile and I have seen dozens and dozens of people leave think they feel great dont need to post. I have this beat. Bullshit you are an addict like everyone else. Get your ass back on the quit train
Luke
You just made my quit that more badass. People who cave make me realize how serious this shit is. Thats why I am still her and will continue to be here.
i know. i fell into the trap that i warned so many other people about. i will recover. i take some solace in knowing that my cave strengthened your quit. and you're right - if you make it a year you should be done, right? nope. and if you're at a year, take this as a cautionary tale. the battle never ends. and i lost. and i'm a broken man because of it.
(1) What happened?
(2) Why did it happen?
(3) What are you doing differently this time?
i don't know what more i can say, wastepanel, apart from what i've already written. i was arrogant and overconfident, i thought i was cured, and this will be different because i say it will. that means nothing to you, i know. my words are hollow because whatever track record i've developed is now washed away. but i won't drift from this site again. at day 10, day 100 or day 1,000. i guess that's what's different. i will not allow myself to get comlacent and drift away.
-
Or we can start with posting day 1 in October
Agreed, where is your day 1 at? Or you getting one last fix in now?
Come on Per you know the drill.
"Your plan to quit is as realistic as my plan to win the lottery". Does that sound familiar?
I am quit right now, but I won't disrespect this site by posting day one on a day that I've dipped. I dipped this morning. I never understood how you could dip in the morning and post Day 1 in the afternoon. I want to keep this clean.
If you see it that way, you've taken it one step further by posting your bullshit "I'll be back tomorrow" in August '11.
Don't want to disrespect this site....give me a fucking break.
i would never disrespect this site and if you feel that i am, please tell me what i need to do to fix that. if you want me to post day zero in october right now, i will do that. but i will not post a day one for june 28. i dipped today. today does not count. i left. i'm a douchebag caver. i deserve all the vitriol. i deserve the anger and disrespect i am due. but i know what this site means and how it works. i will not post a day one on a day that i dipped. that may be fine for people new to the site to get them on board. but i'm not new. i'll post my day one in 61 minutes.
Then you know that posting on the boards without a roll call is forbidden.
Post roll or keep it here.
(By the way, the day that you decide to quit is day 1. Yup, you used this morning. But you also tossed it--unless you didn't. It's day 1.)
You know that day 0 is bullshit.
fair enough. i will call today day one, then, and post in october.
-
Per034,
I saw this and now I'm pissed . I remember reading your quit story and your early posts and was impressed by it. I thought Per was the shit . I don't know you Per but at the moment I hate your fucking guts . I don't envy you in your tea cup in a sea of shit but all I can say is " Man up and get back in here " .
Fuck this sucks .
brainsore
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Per034,
I saw this and now I'm pissed . I remember reading your quit story and your early posts and was impressed by it. I thought Per was the shit . I don't know you Per but at the moment I hate your fucking guts . I don't envy you in your tea cup in a sea of shit but all I can say is " Man up and get back in here " .
Fuck this sucks .
brainsore
i'm sorry brainsore. i'm sorry that you took solace in my words only to find that i'm a fraud. i hope to regain your trust again.
-
Per you know I am going to sound like a broken record but if you dont get anything but this Listen to me now. ITS NOT A FUCKEN PRINGLES CHIP AND U CANT HAVE JUST ONE. I have been around awhile and I have seen dozens and dozens of people leave think they feel great dont need to post. I have this beat. Bullshit you are an addict like everyone else. Get your ass back on the quit train
Luke
You just made my quit that more badass. People who cave make me realize how serious this shit is. Thats why I am still her and will continue to be here.
i know. i fell into the trap that i warned so many other people about. i will recover. i take some solace in knowing that my cave strengthened your quit. and you're right - if you make it a year you should be done, right? nope. and if you're at a year, take this as a cautionary tale. the battle never ends. and i lost. and i'm a broken man because of it.
(1) What happened?
(2) Why did it happen?
(3) What are you doing differently this time?
i don't know what more i can say, wastepanel, apart from what i've already written. i was arrogant and overconfident, i thought i was cured, and this will be different because i say it will. that means nothing to you, i know. my words are hollow because whatever track record i've developed is now washed away. but i won't drift from this site again. at day 10, day 100 or day 1,000. i guess that's what's different. i will not allow myself to get comlacent and drift away.
Do you know who I am? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5715)
This is the same fucking shit that claimed TK (who, strangely enough, is your quit brother now).
We don't fucking quit for day 10, day 1000, day whateverthefuck.
We quit for today.
We learn from the past.
We quit for today.
Fuck the fucking future.
It's not different just because you say it is. Fuck. You've already proven you can't be trusted. Why would I accept your word now?
OWN THIS SHIT.
Go out and be a bigger badass than you were before. Go out and be a better quitter than you were before. Go out and be quit.
Fuck man. This ain't rocket science.
Everyday, I fucking take shit in these new groups. I'm in there hands deep getting shit on and mixing up in all the drama. I defend people, and they fade. I ignore them, and they are pissed because "we decide who stays quit". Fuck. I'm sick of it.
But I do that because of things like this:
Hey Wastepanel-
First, I'm a big fan of your quit support across this site. You have helped many, so thank you for that. But I am struggling with one aspect of KTC that you might be able to help me with.
How do you keep supporting those like AN who clearly are not ready to be all in on their own quit? I just don't believe anyone can stay quit if they are not taking 100% responsibility for themselves first. Yet I see an extrordinary effort goes into trying to keep half-assers here and quitting by you and others. Its admirable, but I can't do it.
I'd like to give back more, but am finding I have no patience for those that are not doing every they can for themselves. I find I'm supporting newbies less and less because of it, and becoming more critical.
Any advice or words of wisdom appreciated.
Again, thanks for what you are doing here.
Congrats on the year quit! More important though, thank you for spending the time that you do on this web site helping teach others how to control this addiction. There should be some comfort in knowing that you have personnally made a difference in several peoples' lives, and taken some revenue from the tobacco companies.
Congrats Thanks!
There is some serious quitting here. Congrats on the 1 year. Fuckin' Large. Thanks for all of your help with our quit as well. cancer.
eafman day 363
Mcarmo44-239- Congtrats Wastepanel one 1 yr quit with you Luby and CNC
Wastepanel-day 365
dano0726--342--Congrats to Wastepanel and all my badass Basterds hitting 1 year!!!!
Jbfla - 364
cbird65 181 QLF Nice 1yr WP
leeron -214-Quit with Luby. Congrats WP
Keddy - 612 - Nice job Wastepanel!
Steve1357- 340- Congrats Wastepanel
dethan33 -182- Nice Wastepanel
Phil4 - 351 - nice work WP
Moe - 358 - nice work WP! Proud of you bud.
Tstahr-170
sno - 256 - Awesome WP, congrats bro!
Coach Steve - 170 - Quit Like Fuck with WP!!
D2maine 131 quit with WP 360 you Inglorious Bastard!!!
DennyX 386 basterd quit! nice 365 wp!
Luby 349 The annual basterd celebration begins. Great job waste! (bump fix)
j2b - 522 - I heard there is a bad ass hitting one year today - out fucking standing!
Jbags5- 365
Jmiah - 350
Colonel - 364 - congrats to all my yearling predecessors
pavetheway - 179 - Grats WP.
ERDVM 167. dildo WP
Tiburonbob - Day 362 Congrats WP.
vannitro - 359
tk- day 1 I hope over time I can gain your forgiveness for fucking all of you over.
All this shit fucking fuels me to push on and continue on? You know why?
Because all of these fucking people I can turn to if I am ever weak. That's my fucking weapon. I will continue building it until I can't take a shit without a quitter in the room making sure I am quit.
That's how I answered number 3, and I fucking go out and live it to the best of my abilities every day. No excuses.
Never, ever again.
-
Not going to search back for your original post, but i assume it goes something like "i drifted, thought just one was okay."
Difficult to have a business-like quit when you're not here to post roll.
You were a leader of that badass group.
Damn, bro. Just, damn.
-
I need this place every fucking day.
Ditto.
True Dat!
Bump.
-
good to see the support. thanks all for taking the time to post on my "introduction."
yoda was a short, ancient, fat, green, midget-dwarf from a make-believe time and place.
i'm no jedi.
i'll keep trying. everyday.
You posted roll. There is no "trying" today. You gave us all your word. If you're a man of your word, you won't be using nicotine today. It's just that simple. When you get a crave, just say "not today, I gave my word." Then get up tomorrow and post roll first thing.
If you worry about quitting for forever, it will only make things harder. The nic bitch goes on a rampage when you tell her y'all are done for good. Just tell her you're quit for today and focus minute by minute if you have to. Forever will work itself out if you post roll first thing every morning.
I read where you've been on this site for hours today. Good. I've never heard of anyone caving because they spent too much time here.
Good to be quit with you. Give a shout if there's anything we can do.
Bump. 'bang head'
-
Per you know I am going to sound like a broken record but if you dont get anything but this Listen to me now. ITS NOT A FUCKEN PRINGLES CHIP AND U CANT HAVE JUST ONE. I have been around awhile and I have seen dozens and dozens of people leave think they feel great dont need to post. I have this beat. Bullshit you are an addict like everyone else. Get your ass back on the quit train
Luke
You just made my quit that more badass. People who cave make me realize how serious this shit is. Thats why I am still her and will continue to be here.
i know. i fell into the trap that i warned so many other people about. i will recover. i take some solace in knowing that my cave strengthened your quit. and you're right - if you make it a year you should be done, right? nope. and if you're at a year, take this as a cautionary tale. the battle never ends. and i lost. and i'm a broken man because of it.
(1) What happened?
(2) Why did it happen?
(3) What are you doing differently this time?
i don't know what more i can say, wastepanel, apart from what i've already written. i was arrogant and overconfident, i thought i was cured, and this will be different because i say it will. that means nothing to you, i know. my words are hollow because whatever track record i've developed is now washed away. but i won't drift from this site again. at day 10, day 100 or day 1,000. i guess that's what's different. i will not allow myself to get comlacent and drift away.
Do you know who I am? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5715)
This is the same fucking shit that claimed TK (who, strangely enough, is your quit brother now).
We don't fucking quit for day 10, day 1000, day whateverthefuck.
We quit for today.
We learn from the past.
We quit for today.
Fuck the fucking future.
It's not different just because you say it is. Fuck. You've already proven you can't be trusted. Why would I accept your word now?
OWN THIS SHIT.
Go out and be a bigger badass than you were before. Go out and be a better quitter than you were before. Go out and be quit.
Fuck man. This ain't rocket science.
Everyday, I fucking take shit in these new groups. I'm in there hands deep getting shit on and mixing up in all the drama. I defend people, and they fade. I ignore them, and they are pissed because "we decide who stays quit". Fuck. I'm sick of it.
But I do that because of things like this:
Hey Wastepanel-
First, I'm a big fan of your quit support across this site. You have helped many, so thank you for that. But I am struggling with one aspect of KTC that you might be able to help me with.
How do you keep supporting those like AN who clearly are not ready to be all in on their own quit? I just don't believe anyone can stay quit if they are not taking 100% responsibility for themselves first. Yet I see an extrordinary effort goes into trying to keep half-assers here and quitting by you and others. Its admirable, but I can't do it.
I'd like to give back more, but am finding I have no patience for those that are not doing every they can for themselves. I find I'm supporting newbies less and less because of it, and becoming more critical.
Any advice or words of wisdom appreciated.
Again, thanks for what you are doing here.
Congrats on the year quit! More important though, thank you for spending the time that you do on this web site helping teach others how to control this addiction. There should be some comfort in knowing that you have personnally made a difference in several peoples' lives, and taken some revenue from the tobacco companies.
Congrats Thanks!
There is some serious quitting here. Congrats on the 1 year. Fuckin' Large. Thanks for all of your help with our quit as well. cancer.
eafman day 363
Mcarmo44-239- Congtrats Wastepanel one 1 yr quit with you Luby and CNC
Wastepanel-day 365
dano0726--342--Congrats to Wastepanel and all my badass Basterds hitting 1 year!!!!
Jbfla - 364
cbird65 181 QLF Nice 1yr WP
leeron -214-Quit with Luby. Congrats WP
Keddy - 612 - Nice job Wastepanel!
Steve1357- 340- Congrats Wastepanel
dethan33 -182- Nice Wastepanel
Phil4 - 351 - nice work WP
Moe - 358 - nice work WP! Proud of you bud.
Tstahr-170
sno - 256 - Awesome WP, congrats bro!
Coach Steve - 170 - Quit Like Fuck with WP!!
D2maine 131 quit with WP 360 you Inglorious Bastard!!!
DennyX 386 basterd quit! nice 365 wp!
Luby 349 The annual basterd celebration begins. Great job waste! (bump fix)
j2b - 522 - I heard there is a bad ass hitting one year today - out fucking standing!
Jbags5- 365
Jmiah - 350
Colonel - 364 - congrats to all my yearling predecessors
pavetheway - 179 - Grats WP.
ERDVM 167. dildo WP
Tiburonbob - Day 362 Congrats WP.
vannitro - 359
tk- day 1 I hope over time I can gain your forgiveness for fucking all of you over.
All this shit fucking fuels me to push on and continue on? You know why?
Because all of these fucking people I can turn to if I am ever weak. That's my fucking weapon. I will continue building it until I can't take a shit without a quitter in the room making sure I am quit.
That's how I answered number 3, and I fucking go out and live it to the best of my abilities every day. No excuses.
Never, ever again.
i may have a better answer for number three as time passes. i wish i had a better answer right now. i don't. i know that i feel differently than i did on april 26, 2011. i know that my committment to quitting today is stronger than it was on that day. i know this is one day, today, that matters. i'm not thinking about day 10 or day 100 or day 1,000 or even day 2. right now, i'm just thinking about the next 24 minutes.
-
I need this place every fucking day.
Ditto.
True Dat!
Bump.
i've been using my own words against myself all evening. i knew then that i needed this place every day and a know that again, now. you're right - my story is no different than any other failure.
-
Per you know I am going to sound like a broken record but if you dont get anything but this Listen to me now. ITS NOT A FUCKEN PRINGLES CHIP AND U CANT HAVE JUST ONE. I have been around awhile and I have seen dozens and dozens of people leave think they feel great dont need to post. I have this beat. Bullshit you are an addict like everyone else. Get your ass back on the quit train
Luke
You just made my quit that more badass. People who cave make me realize how serious this shit is. Thats why I am still her and will continue to be here.
i know. i fell into the trap that i warned so many other people about. i will recover. i take some solace in knowing that my cave strengthened your quit. and you're right - if you make it a year you should be done, right? nope. and if you're at a year, take this as a cautionary tale. the battle never ends. and i lost. and i'm a broken man because of it.
(1) What happened?
(2) Why did it happen?
(3) What are you doing differently this time?
i don't know what more i can say, wastepanel, apart from what i've already written. i was arrogant and overconfident, i thought i was cured, and this will be different because i say it will. that means nothing to you, i know. my words are hollow because whatever track record i've developed is now washed away. but i won't drift from this site again. at day 10, day 100 or day 1,000. i guess that's what's different. i will not allow myself to get comlacent and drift away.
Do you know who I am? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5715)
This is the same fucking shit that claimed TK (who, strangely enough, is your quit brother now).
We don't fucking quit for day 10, day 1000, day whateverthefuck.
We quit for today.
We learn from the past.
We quit for today.
Fuck the fucking future.
It's not different just because you say it is. Fuck. You've already proven you can't be trusted. Why would I accept your word now?
OWN THIS SHIT.
Go out and be a bigger badass than you were before. Go out and be a better quitter than you were before. Go out and be quit.
Fuck man. This ain't rocket science.
Everyday, I fucking take shit in these new groups. I'm in there hands deep getting shit on and mixing up in all the drama. I defend people, and they fade. I ignore them, and they are pissed because "we decide who stays quit". Fuck. I'm sick of it.
But I do that because of things like this:
Hey Wastepanel-
First, I'm a big fan of your quit support across this site. You have helped many, so thank you for that. But I am struggling with one aspect of KTC that you might be able to help me with.
How do you keep supporting those like AN who clearly are not ready to be all in on their own quit? I just don't believe anyone can stay quit if they are not taking 100% responsibility for themselves first. Yet I see an extrordinary effort goes into trying to keep half-assers here and quitting by you and others. Its admirable, but I can't do it.
I'd like to give back more, but am finding I have no patience for those that are not doing every they can for themselves. I find I'm supporting newbies less and less because of it, and becoming more critical.
Any advice or words of wisdom appreciated.
Again, thanks for what you are doing here.
Congrats on the year quit! More important though, thank you for spending the time that you do on this web site helping teach others how to control this addiction. There should be some comfort in knowing that you have personnally made a difference in several peoples' lives, and taken some revenue from the tobacco companies.
Congrats Thanks!
There is some serious quitting here. Congrats on the 1 year. Fuckin' Large. Thanks for all of your help with our quit as well. cancer.
eafman day 363
Mcarmo44-239- Congtrats Wastepanel one 1 yr quit with you Luby and CNC
Wastepanel-day 365
dano0726--342--Congrats to Wastepanel and all my badass Basterds hitting 1 year!!!!
Jbfla - 364
cbird65 181 QLF Nice 1yr WP
leeron -214-Quit with Luby. Congrats WP
Keddy - 612 - Nice job Wastepanel!
Steve1357- 340- Congrats Wastepanel
dethan33 -182- Nice Wastepanel
Phil4 - 351 - nice work WP
Moe - 358 - nice work WP! Proud of you bud.
Tstahr-170
sno - 256 - Awesome WP, congrats bro!
Coach Steve - 170 - Quit Like Fuck with WP!!
D2maine 131 quit with WP 360 you Inglorious Bastard!!!
DennyX 386 basterd quit! nice 365 wp!
Luby 349 The annual basterd celebration begins. Great job waste! (bump fix)
j2b - 522 - I heard there is a bad ass hitting one year today - out fucking standing!
Jbags5- 365
Jmiah - 350
Colonel - 364 - congrats to all my yearling predecessors
pavetheway - 179 - Grats WP.
ERDVM 167. dildo WP
Tiburonbob - Day 362 Congrats WP.
vannitro - 359
tk- day 1 I hope over time I can gain your forgiveness for fucking all of you over.
All this shit fucking fuels me to push on and continue on? You know why?
Because all of these fucking people I can turn to if I am ever weak. That's my fucking weapon. I will continue building it until I can't take a shit without a quitter in the room making sure I am quit.
That's how I answered number 3, and I fucking go out and live it to the best of my abilities every day. No excuses.
Never, ever again.
i may have a better answer for number three as time passes. i wish i had a better answer right now. i don't. i know that i feel differently than i did on april 26, 2011. i know that my committment to quitting today is stronger than it was on that day. i know this is one day, today, that matters. i'm not thinking about day 10 or day 100 or day 1,000 or even day 2. right now, i'm just thinking about the next 24 minutes.
Then own those 24 minutes.
When you're done with that, own the next 24 hours.
No fucking excuses. No pity parties.
Put your foot on her neck and push.
That's all we ask, and that's all you should give.
-
I am a failure. I've failed myself, my loved ones, and my quit brothers and sisters. I am ashamed of what I've done and there is no excuse for my betrayal - because that's what it is, a betrayal. I've betrayed the trust of the good people on this site - people who gave me support and guidance and incredible insight. I will never be able to make up for what I've done. I know that there's a shit storm coming, and I deserve to be standing in the middle of it without an umbrella.
My story is no different than any other failed quit. I had it licked. It was gone. I was master of my own destiny. I didn't need this place anymore. Coming here made me think of it every day, so I stopped coming here. And that's when my failure started. My quit failed on June 10, 2012. I remember the date distinctly. There was no reason. I drove past my usual pusher and instead of continuing to drive by like I had done for 14 months prior, I stopped. I can have one dip. I wasn't addicted anymore. So I bought a tin. And that first dip - well, I'm ashamed to say it was great. But the second one wasn't. It took me three days to get through that can. None of those dips were satisfying save the first. Then I bought another one. then another. before I knew it, within a week, I was back to a can a day. For the past week it's been bad.
No apology from me will ever make up for this betrayal, but understand that I am very sorry for letting you all down. I dipped this morning, so today will not be day one. My day one will start tomorrow.
Invariably, the question will be "how will this be different?" And my answer is not profound - this time it will be different because I say it will. I will use the tools on this site and lean on the expertise available here. I know how and why the program works and I know where and how I failed. Complacency got the best of me. My sin is arrogance. It won't happen again. I know those are hollow words from a cowardly man, but I will not let this take over my life yet again.
Please forgive me. Give me what I deserve. I may be a coward, but I'm man enough to take my medicine.
I'm sorry Dante, DChogs, KTK, Closer, LL, Nico, Dforbes, Parry, Sayrah and all of the Quitheads.
Fuck me, I am crushed. I had a text tonight that teamkeoki was back and that pissed me off, so I logged into October 12 to see what tk's bullshit was and I find per is back with a day one. Seriously glad I was no where near a store this one rocked my quit to the core. Per your advice and support in my intro thread helped me immensly, finding out you are a fraud.... Fuck. I wish I could just trash you for caving, but I can't I am just shook you were a rock for me early on, your advice saved my quit and now I don't know what to think.... Glad I am home, glad I am quit, tomorrow is a new day. But still.... Fuck when a quitter I think is strong turns out to be weak, where does that leave me?
-
I am a failure. I've failed myself, my loved ones, and my quit brothers and sisters. I am ashamed of what I've done and there is no excuse for my betrayal - because that's what it is, a betrayal. I've betrayed the trust of the good people on this site - people who gave me support and guidance and incredible insight. I will never be able to make up for what I've done. I know that there's a shit storm coming, and I deserve to be standing in the middle of it without an umbrella.
My story is no different than any other failed quit. I had it licked. It was gone. I was master of my own destiny. I didn't need this place anymore. Coming here made me think of it every day, so I stopped coming here. And that's when my failure started. My quit failed on June 10, 2012. I remember the date distinctly. There was no reason. I drove past my usual pusher and instead of continuing to drive by like I had done for 14 months prior, I stopped. I can have one dip. I wasn't addicted anymore. So I bought a tin. And that first dip - well, I'm ashamed to say it was great. But the second one wasn't. It took me three days to get through that can. None of those dips were satisfying save the first. Then I bought another one. then another. before I knew it, within a week, I was back to a can a day. For the past week it's been bad.
No apology from me will ever make up for this betrayal, but understand that I am very sorry for letting you all down. I dipped this morning, so today will not be day one. My day one will start tomorrow.
Invariably, the question will be "how will this be different?" And my answer is not profound - this time it will be different because I say it will. I will use the tools on this site and lean on the expertise available here. I know how and why the program works and I know where and how I failed. Complacency got the best of me. My sin is arrogance. It won't happen again. I know those are hollow words from a cowardly man, but I will not let this take over my life yet again.
Please forgive me. Give me what I deserve. I may be a coward, but I'm man enough to take my medicine.
I'm sorry Dante, DChogs, KTK, Closer, LL, Nico, Dforbes, Parry, Sayrah and all of the Quitheads.
Fuck me, I am crushed. I had a text tonight that teamkeoki was back and that pissed me off, so I logged into October 12 to see what tk's bullshit was and I find per is back with a day one. Seriously glad I was no where near a store this one rocked my quit to the core. Per your advice and support in my intro thread helped me immensly, finding out you are a fraud.... Fuck. I wish I could just trash you for caving, but I can't I am just shook you were a rock for me early on, your advice saved my quit and now I don't know what to think.... Glad I am home, glad I am quit, tomorrow is a new day. But still.... Fuck when a quitter I think is strong turns out to be weak, where does that leave me?
+1 Luby. This is the hardest yet. One of your victory stories from when I was around day 10 is something I've held onto for the last 370+ days. I remember you telling it in chat, how you were struggling, you walked into the c-store thinking you were going to cave, but somehow grew balls and didn't buy cope. That's hard for me, but reinforces that our numbers don't mean anything. At all. We are quit today, be it day 1 or day 387 as it is for me.
-
I grew a bigger set by reading all this b/s.
-
.... Fuck when a quitter I think is strong turns out to be weak, where does that leave me?
Luby,
It leaves you more vigilant, stronger and more protective of your own quit.
You quit like a rockstar. Keep up the good work.
As we all know, the first few days of a quit are all about determination. As the days pass the quit requires less attention, less determination. The nic bitch watches patiently at this time, waiting for the opportune moment to capitalize on complacency. Waiting for you to forget about the types of lies she uses (" come on, what will it hurt? you can have just one, you've been quit ___ days....") As loot says "the day you forget- you lose"
Per thought that he was a special butterfly, that he could control his quit, and eventually control his addiction. His story is just like so many others here. Surprising that he was taken down so easily, by such cliche lies of addiction? Perhaps... but perhaps not. The nic bitch has lured quitters back after thousands of days with those same lies. If we assume that we are immune, we do so at our own peril.
None of us are special butterflies, we are addicts, and we will be the rest of our lives. We will always have to protect our quit, to remind ourselves that we are addicts, and that there is no "just one" ever again. Sometimes we will have to fight complacency, to continue to post when it seems to be nothing but a chore. But that promise will keep us quit, so it is worth whatever effort it costs.
-
This is bullshit. While I'm going to let my words to Pat stay between us, I do want to say something here just so that the new kids don't think this shit is okay. I'm going to continue to support Per, but things will not be the same. If you cave, your brothers and sisters might forgive you, but that brotherhood is broken. You might use tape and glue to make things okay, but at the end of the day, that shit is still broken.
Post roll every day. Keep your word. Get involved. Rinse, repeat. It works if you are here.
The day you leave KTC is the day the clock starts ticking, counting down the seconds to your cave.
-
I know everyone says they "are quit" . I don't believe an addict is ever quit. All the long term quitters who have caved reinforce that belief. (yep, I know I will take shit over that comment)
This is heavy shit. If someone was actually "quit" they would never have to worry about nicotine again. We all know that isn't true. One false step and it is over.
Win the day....one day at a time. That is all an addict can do. Never forget. Never let your guard down. Never get complacent.
As sad as this cave is, it just reinforces to me the need to be vigilant and that a 10 year quiter is no different than a 1 day quiter. Each day you start anew. You gain no collateral by being quit for 10 years, because the next day both the 10 year guy and the 1 day guy are in the same boat. They are both addicts trying to quit for the day.
-
I know everyone says they "are quit" . I don't believe an addict is ever quit. All the long term quitters who have caved reinforce that belief. (yep, I know I will take shit over that comment)
This is heavy shit. If someone was actually "quit" they would never have to worry about nicotine again. We all know that isn't true. One false step and it is over.
Win the day....one day at a time. That is all an addict can do. Never forget. Never let your guard down. Never get complacent.
As sad as this cave is, it just reinforces to me the need to be vigilant and that a 10 year quiter is no different than a 1 day quiter. Each day you start anew. You gain no collateral by being quit for 10 years, because the next day both the 10 year guy and the 1 day guy are in the same boat. They are both addicts trying to quit for the day.
everyone who posted roll today is quit. nobody is quit tomorrow. i was quit. on the morning of june 10 i was quit. then i decided to let the bitch back into my life. i wasn't worried about nicotine. i was going to see an old friend again - it had been so long. i forgot that this friend was a miserable cunt. i forgot that she looked good from a distance but up close she sucked the life out of me and had gnarly teeth and shit-stained drawers.
i just read of someone who decided to"step away" from the boards recently. that's what i decided. it's not something i would advise. it doesn't matter how long you've been here. every day is day one.
i've let so many people down with my cave and weakened so many quits. my story is a cautionary tale. let it strengthen your resolve not weaken your quit. it's hard for me to spew any advice because i'm clearly nothing but a piece of shit caver - but i gotta put it out there.
you're right carumba - one false step and it's over.
-
i've let so many people down with my cave and weakened so many quits.
Per you make me laugh....I havent said a word about your cave. I will say it was dissappointing but if you are that stupid then so be it....
But you honestly believe you have weakened so many quits.....So you cave and all these other badass quitters are going to cave now because you did. Difference between you and them they have the sac to realize what they are. I understand there is never another visit to an "old friend" You are not special and get over your self. You didnt weaken anyones quit and if you of all people did, then how strong are those quits you are weakening????
Husker-Day 472
-
i've let so many people down with my cave and weakened so many quits.
Per you make me laugh....I havent said a word about your cave. I will say it was dissappointing but if you are that stupid then so be it....
But you honestly believe you have weakened so many quits.....So you cave and all these other badass quitters are going to cave now because you did. Difference between you and them they have the sac to realize what they are. I understand there is never another visit to an "old friend" You are not special and get over your self. You didnt weaken anyones quit and if you of all people did, then how strong are those quits you are weakening????
Husker-Day 472
that's fair husker. i'm not special. i don't believe my situation is some spectacular event that changed the cosmos. i'm a caver. there are thousands of them who have come to and gone from this site. i'm just acknowleding the pm's i've gotten making that statement. i understand that some feel i've weakened their quit, and others feel my cave is just some bullshit story and it had no impact on thier quit. i'm just here to quit today. that's all.
i'm not special. i never claimed to be.
-
everyone who posted roll today is quit. nobody is quit tomorrow. i was quit. on the morning of june 10 i was quit.
Semantics
Everyone that posts roll isn't quit. They are promising not to use that day.
You didn't use June 9. You were quit for that day. You weren't quit June 10. You used. Your own logic agrees with this because you didn't want to post on the same day you used. A cave and a quit can't occur on the same day.
-
i've let so many people down with my cave and weakened so many quits.
Per you make me laugh....I havent said a word about your cave. I will say it was dissappointing but if you are that stupid then so be it....
But you honestly believe you have weakened so many quits.....So you cave and all these other badass quitters are going to cave now because you did. Difference between you and them they have the sac to realize what they are. I understand there is never another visit to an "old friend" You are not special and get over your self. You didnt weaken anyones quit and if you of all people did, then how strong are those quits you are weakening????
Husker-Day 472
that's fair husker. i'm not special. i don't believe my situation is some spectacular event that changed the cosmos. i'm a caver. there are thousands of them who have come to and gone from this site. i'm just acknowleding the pm's i've gotten making that statement. i understand that some feel i've weakened their quit, and others feel my cave is just some bullshit story and it had no impact on thier quit. i'm just here to quit today. that's all.
i'm not special. i never claimed to be.
Ok Per...
Maybe I just look at it differently...My quit is my quit..No one will effect it more than me. Keep your head on straight, learn from the idiotic decision you made and quit one day at a time. We are quit for today and thats a great thing.
-
i've let so many people down with my cave and weakened so many quits.
Per you make me laugh....I havent said a word about your cave. I will say it was dissappointing but if you are that stupid then so be it....
But you honestly believe you have weakened so many quits.....So you cave and all these other badass quitters are going to cave now because you did. Difference between you and them they have the sac to realize what they are. I understand there is never another visit to an "old friend" You are not special and get over your self. You didnt weaken anyones quit and if you of all people did, then how strong are those quits you are weakening????
Husker-Day 472
that's fair husker. i'm not special. i don't believe my situation is some spectacular event that changed the cosmos. i'm a caver. there are thousands of them who have come to and gone from this site. i'm just acknowleding the pm's i've gotten making that statement. i understand that some feel i've weakened their quit, and others feel my cave is just some bullshit story and it had no impact on thier quit. i'm just here to quit today. that's all.
i'm not special. i never claimed to be.
Ok Per...
Maybe I just look at it differently...My quit is my quit..No one will effect it more than me. Keep your head on straight, learn from the idiotic decision you made and quit one day at a time. We are quit for today and thats a great thing.
amen to that. quit with you today husker.
-
.... Fuck when a quitter I think is strong turns out to be weak, where does that leave me?
Luby,
It leaves you more vigilant, stronger and more protective of your own quit.
You quit like a rockstar. Keep up the good work.
As we all know, the first few days of a quit are all about determination. As the days pass the quit requires less attention, less determination. The nic bitch watches patiently at this time, waiting for the opportune moment to capitalize on complacency. Waiting for you to forget about the types of lies she uses (" come on, what will it hurt? you can have just one, you've been quit ___ days....") As loot says "the day you forget- you lose"
Per thought that he was a special butterfly, that he could control his quit, and eventually control his addiction. His story is just like so many others here. Surprising that he was taken down so easily, by such cliche lies of addiction? Perhaps... but perhaps not. The nic bitch has lured quitters back after thousands of days with those same lies. If we assume that we are immune, we do so at our own peril.
None of us are special butterflies, we are addicts, and we will be the rest of our lives. We will always have to protect our quit, to remind ourselves that we are addicts, and that there is no "just one" ever again. Sometimes we will have to fight complacency, to continue to post when it seems to be nothing but a chore. But that promise will keep us quit, so it is worth whatever effort it costs.
30 I am all good. To tell ya the truth I hadn't thought of per in a long time. But he was the most important advice giver early for me and I thought he was a rock. His cave made me stronger just as others have. I pm'd per to let him know I am not gonna attack him. I still owe him for all his help, and I want him quit so that is where I am at.
I was a little shook that night and the support I got because of simple post in this intro thread reconfirmed everything I love about this community.
So 30 thanks I'm good. Per we got this today. I'll quit with you today.
-
.... Fuck when a quitter I think is strong turns out to be weak, where does that leave me?
Luby,
It leaves you more vigilant, stronger and more protective of your own quit.
You quit like a rockstar. Keep up the good work.
As we all know, the first few days of a quit are all about determination. As the days pass the quit requires less attention, less determination. The nic bitch watches patiently at this time, waiting for the opportune moment to capitalize on complacency. Waiting for you to forget about the types of lies she uses (" come on, what will it hurt? you can have just one, you've been quit ___ days....") As loot says "the day you forget- you lose"
Per thought that he was a special butterfly, that he could control his quit, and eventually control his addiction. His story is just like so many others here. Surprising that he was taken down so easily, by such cliche lies of addiction? Perhaps... but perhaps not. The nic bitch has lured quitters back after thousands of days with those same lies. If we assume that we are immune, we do so at our own peril.
None of us are special butterflies, we are addicts, and we will be the rest of our lives. We will always have to protect our quit, to remind ourselves that we are addicts, and that there is no "just one" ever again. Sometimes we will have to fight complacency, to continue to post when it seems to be nothing but a chore. But that promise will keep us quit, so it is worth whatever effort it costs.
30 I am all good. To tell ya the truth I hadn't thought of per in a long time. But he was the most important advice giver early for me and I thought he was a rock. His cave made me stronger just as others have. I pm'd per to let him know I am not gonna attack him. I still owe him for all his help, and I want him quit so that is where I am at.
I was a little shook that night and the support I got because of simple post in this intro thread reconfirmed everything I love about this community.
So 30 thanks I'm good. Per we got this today. I'll quit with you today.
Luby,
You are a bad ass. Your quit shall not be weakened. Stay the course. You will never regret quitting.
-
.... Fuck when a quitter I think is strong turns out to be weak, where does that leave me?
Luby,
It leaves you more vigilant, stronger and more protective of your own quit.
You quit like a rockstar. Keep up the good work.
As we all know, the first few days of a quit are all about determination. As the days pass the quit requires less attention, less determination. The nic bitch watches patiently at this time, waiting for the opportune moment to capitalize on complacency. Waiting for you to forget about the types of lies she uses (" come on, what will it hurt? you can have just one, you've been quit ___ days....") As loot says "the day you forget- you lose"
Per thought that he was a special butterfly, that he could control his quit, and eventually control his addiction. His story is just like so many others here. Surprising that he was taken down so easily, by such cliche lies of addiction? Perhaps... but perhaps not. The nic bitch has lured quitters back after thousands of days with those same lies. If we assume that we are immune, we do so at our own peril.
None of us are special butterflies, we are addicts, and we will be the rest of our lives. We will always have to protect our quit, to remind ourselves that we are addicts, and that there is no "just one" ever again. Sometimes we will have to fight complacency, to continue to post when it seems to be nothing but a chore. But that promise will keep us quit, so it is worth whatever effort it costs.
30 I am all good. To tell ya the truth I hadn't thought of per in a long time. But he was the most important advice giver early for me and I thought he was a rock. His cave made me stronger just as others have. I pm'd per to let him know I am not gonna attack him. I still owe him for all his help, and I want him quit so that is where I am at.
I was a little shook that night and the support I got because of simple post in this intro thread reconfirmed everything I love about this community.
So 30 thanks I'm good. Per we got this today. I'll quit with you today.
Luby,
You are a bad ass. Your quit shall not be weakened. Stay the course. You will never regret quitting.
Peepers,
You can stare at me any time you want.
Love,
Coach Steve
-
Cuts Reay.
Checked messages... None. No missed calls.
woulda walked ten miles brother
-
.... Fuck when a quitter I think is strong turns out to be weak, where does that leave me?
Luby,
It leaves you more vigilant, stronger and more protective of your own quit.
You quit like a rockstar. Keep up the good work.
As we all know, the first few days of a quit are all about determination. As the days pass the quit requires less attention, less determination. The nic bitch watches patiently at this time, waiting for the opportune moment to capitalize on complacency. Waiting for you to forget about the types of lies she uses (" come on, what will it hurt? you can have just one, you've been quit ___ days....") As loot says "the day you forget- you lose"
Per thought that he was a special butterfly, that he could control his quit, and eventually control his addiction. His story is just like so many others here. Surprising that he was taken down so easily, by such cliche lies of addiction? Perhaps... but perhaps not. The nic bitch has lured quitters back after thousands of days with those same lies. If we assume that we are immune, we do so at our own peril.
None of us are special butterflies, we are addicts, and we will be the rest of our lives. We will always have to protect our quit, to remind ourselves that we are addicts, and that there is no "just one" ever again. Sometimes we will have to fight complacency, to continue to post when it seems to be nothing but a chore. But that promise will keep us quit, so it is worth whatever effort it costs.
30 I am all good. To tell ya the truth I hadn't thought of per in a long time. But he was the most important advice giver early for me and I thought he was a rock. His cave made me stronger just as others have. I pm'd per to let him know I am not gonna attack him. I still owe him for all his help, and I want him quit so that is where I am at.
I was a little shook that night and the support I got because of simple post in this intro thread reconfirmed everything I love about this community.
So 30 thanks I'm good. Per we got this today. I'll quit with you today.
Luby,
You are a bad ass. Your quit shall not be weakened. Stay the course. You will never regret quitting.
Peepers,
You can stare at me any time you want.
Love,
Coach Steve
Are you fucking kidding me Luby? Don't you fucking start to contemplate the depths of your conviction. You have balls of steel.
The train has not come off the tracks. To assume that anyone of us is beyond the lure of using would be foolish. We're addicts. It doesn't stop. The thing that can stop is the fight, the absolute belief that YOU ARE WORTH MORE.
-
.... Fuck when a quitter I think is strong turns out to be weak, where does that leave me?
Luby,
It leaves you more vigilant, stronger and more protective of your own quit.
You quit like a rockstar. Keep up the good work.
As we all know, the first few days of a quit are all about determination. As the days pass the quit requires less attention, less determination. The nic bitch watches patiently at this time, waiting for the opportune moment to capitalize on complacency. Waiting for you to forget about the types of lies she uses (" come on, what will it hurt? you can have just one, you've been quit ___ days....") As loot says "the day you forget- you lose"
Per thought that he was a special butterfly, that he could control his quit, and eventually control his addiction. His story is just like so many others here. Surprising that he was taken down so easily, by such cliche lies of addiction? Perhaps... but perhaps not. The nic bitch has lured quitters back after thousands of days with those same lies. If we assume that we are immune, we do so at our own peril.
None of us are special butterflies, we are addicts, and we will be the rest of our lives. We will always have to protect our quit, to remind ourselves that we are addicts, and that there is no "just one" ever again. Sometimes we will have to fight complacency, to continue to post when it seems to be nothing but a chore. But that promise will keep us quit, so it is worth whatever effort it costs.
30 I am all good. To tell ya the truth I hadn't thought of per in a long time. But he was the most important advice giver early for me and I thought he was a rock. His cave made me stronger just as others have. I pm'd per to let him know I am not gonna attack him. I still owe him for all his help, and I want him quit so that is where I am at.
I was a little shook that night and the support I got because of simple post in this intro thread reconfirmed everything I love about this community.
So 30 thanks I'm good. Per we got this today. I'll quit with you today.
Luby,
You are a bad ass. Your quit shall not be weakened. Stay the course. You will never regret quitting.
Peepers,
You can stare at me any time you want.
Love,
Coach Steve
Are you fucking kidding me Luby? Don't you fucking start to contemplate the depths of your conviction. You have balls of steel.
The train has not come off the tracks. To assume that anyone of us is beyond the lure of using would be foolish. We're addicts. It doesn't stop. The thing that can stop is the fight, the absolute belief that YOU ARE WORTH MORE.
Old post, still relevant
91 days is huge, but it's just a start. YOur going to have good and bad days. You WILL still make up reasons why you need to dip. At least I do. Funny thing is you'll recognize your own bs. I can actually laugh at myself now when I think " I'm really stressed out, maybe I should have a dip" it used to piss me off that I still thought like that, now, although annoying , its just lame. I don't know about the future but I think I may have that little whisper for a long time, maybe forever. I have decided that's ok. It is the price I have to pay because I started dipping in the first place. Kind of like a physical scar from some dumbass thing I did as a kid. Only this scar is a mental one .
The guys that cave after 100 or even 1,000 forget. They forget that they're addicts. They forget that the whisper is never going away. They forget how hard it was to get to 100 days clean. I am still getting better at catching myself rationalizing why I could or should dip again. Mostly because I watch the new guys saying the same stupid shit, only they believe it still. I think I win in the end, as long as I stay quit one day at a time, I'll keep healing.
I dipped for 8,000 plus days. My 479 kicks ass, but 8,000 days of dipping is a long time . It will take a bit to unlearn all that shit. It'll take a bit to learn who the hell I am without dip. Smokey once said "Bout time we start reclaiming control of other aspects of our lives and choices, eh? Hate to break it to you Octopussies, but this isn't just about quitting nicotine."
In my opinion it is also about letting go of an imaginary crutch and learning how to run without it, and Smoke is right about reclaiming control of our lives and choices. This is one of my favorite quotes, because it really puts the shit in perspective.
sm
-
.... Fuck when a quitter I think is strong turns out to be weak, where does that leave me?
Luby,
It leaves you more vigilant, stronger and more protective of your own quit.
You quit like a rockstar. Keep up the good work.
As we all know, the first few days of a quit are all about determination. As the days pass the quit requires less attention, less determination. The nic bitch watches patiently at this time, waiting for the opportune moment to capitalize on complacency. Waiting for you to forget about the types of lies she uses (" come on, what will it hurt? you can have just one, you've been quit ___ days....") As loot says "the day you forget- you lose"
Per thought that he was a special butterfly, that he could control his quit, and eventually control his addiction. His story is just like so many others here. Surprising that he was taken down so easily, by such cliche lies of addiction? Perhaps... but perhaps not. The nic bitch has lured quitters back after thousands of days with those same lies. If we assume that we are immune, we do so at our own peril.
None of us are special butterflies, we are addicts, and we will be the rest of our lives. We will always have to protect our quit, to remind ourselves that we are addicts, and that there is no "just one" ever again. Sometimes we will have to fight complacency, to continue to post when it seems to be nothing but a chore. But that promise will keep us quit, so it is worth whatever effort it costs.
30 I am all good. To tell ya the truth I hadn't thought of per in a long time. But he was the most important advice giver early for me and I thought he was a rock. His cave made me stronger just as others have. I pm'd per to let him know I am not gonna attack him. I still owe him for all his help, and I want him quit so that is where I am at.
I was a little shook that night and the support I got because of simple post in this intro thread reconfirmed everything I love about this community.
So 30 thanks I'm good. Per we got this today. I'll quit with you today.
Luby,
You are a bad ass. Your quit shall not be weakened. Stay the course. You will never regret quitting.
Peepers,
You can stare at me any time you want.
Love,
Coach Steve
Are you fucking kidding me Luby? Don't you fucking start to contemplate the depths of your conviction. You have balls of steel.
The train has not come off the tracks. To assume that anyone of us is beyond the lure of using would be foolish. We're addicts. It doesn't stop. The thing that can stop is the fight, the absolute belief that YOU ARE WORTH MORE.
Old post, still relevant
91 days is huge, but it's just a start. YOur going to have good and bad days. You WILL still make up reasons why you need to dip. At least I do. Funny thing is you'll recognize your own bs. I can actually laugh at myself now when I think " I'm really stressed out, maybe I should have a dip" it used to piss me off that I still thought like that, now, although annoying , its just lame. I don't know about the future but I think I may have that little whisper for a long time, maybe forever. I have decided that's ok. It is the price I have to pay because I started dipping in the first place. Kind of like a physical scar from some dumbass thing I did as a kid. Only this scar is a mental one .
The guys that cave after 100 or even 1,000 forget. They forget that they're addicts. They forget that the whisper is never going away. They forget how hard it was to get to 100 days clean. I am still getting better at catching myself rationalizing why I could or should dip again. Mostly because I watch the new guys saying the same stupid shit, only they believe it still. I think I win in the end, as long as I stay quit one day at a time, I'll keep healing.
I dipped for 8,000 plus days. My 479 kicks ass, but 8,000 days of dipping is a long time . It will take a bit to unlearn all that shit. It'll take a bit to learn who the hell I am without dip. Smokey once said "Bout time we start reclaiming control of other aspects of our lives and choices, eh? Hate to break it to you Octopussies, but this isn't just about quitting nicotine."
In my opinion it is also about letting go of an imaginary crutch and learning how to run without it, and Smoke is right about reclaiming control of our lives and choices. This is one of my favorite quotes, because it really puts the shit in perspective.
sm
Another oldie, but still applies
Fuck, I never even talked to you, but anybody that caves after that long used to seriously fuck with my mind. Including Ray Ray at 800 plus. Until I wrapped my head around this little gem with the help of SmokeyG. If you forget your an addict your fucked.Just don't forget. SAY IT WITH ME CLASS " I CANT HAVE JUST ONE BECAUSE ONE IS TOO MANY AND A MILLION ISNT ENOUGH, I AM A ADDICT"
Pain fades, cancer fear fades, that feeling of hopeless addiction fades, memory of the suck fades. The addiction itself, that doesn't fade. It is as strong as it was on day one.
You newbies see if you can remember this analogy. Imagine your an apprentice lion tamer, you slowly learn where to stand and how to use the whip and the stool to keep those man eating S.O.B's off your fat ass. Slowly your going to get better at it. At 319 I'm no longer a novice. I could use the whip to make those kittens do the Irish fucking River dance. They're no longer lions to me but safe lil kitty cats. Except one day you forget how dangerous those fuckers are. You walk into the lion cage and forget your whip, you forget the stool, you put on a pair of bacon underoos. Guess what the lil kittens do? They turn back into lions and eat your stupid ass underoos and all. Complacency leads to failure.
sM
For reference to Smokey from me,
QUOTEÂ
Thoughts on Ray Ray. 800 day quitter caves with no real explanation. WTF . When are you safe? is it a frame of mind nurtured somehow to where you are less likely to succumb or are you never safe and must remain on constant watch forever?
I'd like your thoughts . or a group think in 295. Just sayin.
Sm
and the replySorry man - this is forever. All that means is never forgetting you are an addict. RayRay just forgot. (SmokeyG)
-
tomorrow I hit 100. again. it's different this time around. i don't have the sense of pride. i have more of a realization that it's never over. 100 days. great. big fucking deal. 1,000 days... 10,000 days... 10,000 days is actually just over 27 years. I'll be 66. And I'll still be worried about caving. It never ends. I read a post from MThomas today about a conversation with his wife. It really resonated with me. I was there - except I didn't have a conversation. I had the same mindset he spoke of when he said he need to "leave the hospital" for a while. He was convinced to stick around. I wasn't. When I left, I failed. I didn't reach out to the people who cared about me. My wife. My friends. And most of all my support system here. i wasn't cured. We're never cured. This is a disease that we seek to manage. Not one that we can ever heal.
I appreciate all the support I've been given since I returned. It's come from all over. The Quitheads of August 11 have been tremendous in accepting me back. DChogs and Dante, especially. Others, like Luby, CBird, and Ready - they've been posting support for me from the beginning. I'm really honored by that support. I don't feel like I deserve it, but I'll always remember it. But my history still leaves an open scar. I'll never earn the faith and trust back of other quitters who were my friends and who I betrayed. guys like Souli and Sco... the first time around they were rocks for me. Now I'm invisible to them. And I earned that. I'll never be the quitter I imagined I would be because I failed.
Since I came back I've been, for the most part, inactive. I want to get the HOF behind me because I don't feel like I belong. I'm Pete Rose. I cheated. I'm Shoeless Joe. I disgraced the integrity of this place. I don't deserve the Hall. I understand now how Ed Romero felt when he came back and joined the Quitheads. I never got how he could come back and be silent. But now I get it. We cavers... we need this place; but we don't feel like we really belong again. At least that how I feel. Let this be a cautionary tale for those who are considering a cave. You can return - but you can never come all the way back.
I should be celebrating tomorrow. I don't feel like celebrating though. I'll still be here. But then again, I said that once before. Today I'm here. And today is all that matters.
-
tomorrow I hit 100. again. it's different this time around. i don't have the sense of pride. i have more of a realization that it's never over. 100 days. great. big fucking deal. 1,000 days... 10,000 days... 10,000 days is actually just over 27 years. I'll be 66. And I'll still be worried about caving. It never ends. I read a post from MThomas today about a conversation with his wife. It really resonated with me. I was there - except I didn't have a conversation. I had the same mindset he spoke of when he said he need to "leave the hospital" for a while. He was convinced to stick around. I wasn't. When I left, I failed. I didn't reach out to the people who cared about me. My wife. My friends. And most of all my support system here. i wasn't cured. We're never cured. This is a disease that we seek to manage. Not one that we can ever heal.
I appreciate all the support I've been given since I returned. It's come from all over. The Quitheads of August 11 have been tremendous in accepting me back. DChogs and Dante, especially. Others, like Luby, CBird, and Ready - they've been posting support for me from the beginning. I'm really honored by that support. I don't feel like I deserve it, but I'll always remember it. But my history still leaves an open scar. I'll never earn the faith and trust back of other quitters who were my friends and who I betrayed. guys like Souli and Sco... the first time around they were rocks for me. Now I'm invisible to them. And I earned that. I'll never be the quitter I imagined I would be because I failed.
Since I came back I've been, for the most part, inactive. I want to get the HOF behind me because I don't feel like I belong. I'm Pete Rose. I cheated. I'm Shoeless Joe. I disgraced the integrity of this place. I don't deserve the Hall. I understand now how Ed Romero felt when he came back and joined the Quitheads. I never got how he could come back and be silent. But now I get it. We cavers... we need this place; but we don't feel like we really belong again. At least that how I feel. Let this be a cautionary tale for those who are considering a cave. You can return - but you can never come all the way back.
I should be celebrating tomorrow. I don't feel like celebrating though. I'll still be here. But then again, I said that once before. Today I'm here. And today is all that matters.
Hey -
I was going to wait, but I think this needs to be said currently as I read and respond.
First - Keep your head up. You are a Human Being. You are not perfect (Hell neither am I). Yes I have been made to understand that in dealing with the Nic Lady that it is a life or death choice, but you had a slip before, and guess what. As of now you have survived. You came back, and you were a steadfast part of our Oct 12 madmen.
Second - you made it back when you wake up tomorrow. Under any circumtances, 100 days is a good feat and should be celebrated. As you have understood, yes it is not an end but a milestone along the way. If you see the Major League Baseball players they celebrate the division victory but it is not the end of what they are striving for. So treat it as the same, don't discount it.
Am proud to have you in our group, and hope to see you there for the days to come....like getting to that 2nd floor. Be Quit with you.
-
tomorrow I hit 100. again. it's different this time around. i don't have the sense of pride. i have more of a realization that it's never over. 100 days. great. big fucking deal. 1,000 days... 10,000 days... 10,000 days is actually just over 27 years. I'll be 66. And I'll still be worried about caving. It never ends. I read a post from MThomas today about a conversation with his wife. It really resonated with me. I was there - except I didn't have a conversation. I had the same mindset he spoke of when he said he need to "leave the hospital" for a while. He was convinced to stick around. I wasn't. When I left, I failed. I didn't reach out to the people who cared about me. My wife. My friends. And most of all my support system here. i wasn't cured. We're never cured. This is a disease that we seek to manage. Not one that we can ever heal.
I appreciate all the support I've been given since I returned. It's come from all over. The Quitheads of August 11 have been tremendous in accepting me back. DChogs and Dante, especially. Others, like Luby, CBird, and Ready - they've been posting support for me from the beginning. I'm really honored by that support. I don't feel like I deserve it, but I'll always remember it. But my history still leaves an open scar. I'll never earn the faith and trust back of other quitters who were my friends and who I betrayed. guys like Souli and Sco... the first time around they were rocks for me. Now I'm invisible to them. And I earned that. I'll never be the quitter I imagined I would be because I failed.
Since I came back I've been, for the most part, inactive. I want to get the HOF behind me because I don't feel like I belong. I'm Pete Rose. I cheated. I'm Shoeless Joe. I disgraced the integrity of this place. I don't deserve the Hall. I understand now how Ed Romero felt when he came back and joined the Quitheads. I never got how he could come back and be silent. But now I get it. We cavers... we need this place; but we don't feel like we really belong again. At least that how I feel. Let this be a cautionary tale for those who are considering a cave. You can return - but you can never come all the way back.
I should be celebrating tomorrow. I don't feel like celebrating though. I'll still be here. But then again, I said that once before. Today I'm here. And today is all that matters.
Hey -
I was going to wait, but I think this needs to be said currently as I read and respond.
First - Keep your head up. You are a Human Being. You are not perfect (Hell neither am I). Yes I have been made to understand that in dealing with the Nic Lady that it is a life or death choice, but you had a slip before, and guess what. As of now you have survived. You came back, and you were a steadfast part of our Oct 12 madmen.
Second - you made it back when you wake up tomorrow. Under any circumtances, 100 days is a good feat and should be celebrated. As you have understood, yes it is not an end but a milestone along the way. If you see the Major League Baseball players they celebrate the division victory but it is not the end of what they are striving for. So treat it as the same, don't discount it.
Am proud to have you in our group, and hope to see you there for the days to come....like getting to that 2nd floor. Be Quit with you.
We're addicts.
We belong.
Learn from your past.
Quit for today.
Fuck tomorrow.
Don't hate yourself because you know what it is to fail. Use your past to inspire and let others know how hard you fall. It's why we're here :accountability. If falling didn't hurt, we'd never get stronger. Some of us have to see firsthand though. It's not ok. It's just a fact.
Set your safeties. Protect your friends. That's all we do here and you're doing it.
I'm proud of you man.
Keep it up, and don't let it happen again.
-
tomorrow I hit 100. again. it's different this time around. i don't have the sense of pride. i have more of a realization that it's never over. 100 days. great. big fucking deal. 1,000 days... 10,000 days... 10,000 days is actually just over 27 years. I'll be 66. And I'll still be worried about caving. It never ends. I read a post from MThomas today about a conversation with his wife. It really resonated with me. I was there - except I didn't have a conversation. I had the same mindset he spoke of when he said he need to "leave the hospital" for a while. He was convinced to stick around. I wasn't. When I left, I failed. I didn't reach out to the people who cared about me. My wife. My friends. And most of all my support system here. i wasn't cured. We're never cured. This is a disease that we seek to manage. Not one that we can ever heal.
I appreciate all the support I've been given since I returned. It's come from all over. The Quitheads of August 11 have been tremendous in accepting me back. DChogs and Dante, especially. Others, like Luby, CBird, and Ready - they've been posting support for me from the beginning. I'm really honored by that support. I don't feel like I deserve it, but I'll always remember it. But my history still leaves an open scar. I'll never earn the faith and trust back of other quitters who were my friends and who I betrayed. guys like Souli and Sco... the first time around they were rocks for me. Now I'm invisible to them. And I earned that. I'll never be the quitter I imagined I would be because I failed.
Since I came back I've been, for the most part, inactive. I want to get the HOF behind me because I don't feel like I belong. I'm Pete Rose. I cheated. I'm Shoeless Joe. I disgraced the integrity of this place. I don't deserve the Hall. I understand now how Ed Romero felt when he came back and joined the Quitheads. I never got how he could come back and be silent. But now I get it. We cavers... we need this place; but we don't feel like we really belong again. At least that how I feel. Let this be a cautionary tale for those who are considering a cave. You can return - but you can never come all the way back.
I should be celebrating tomorrow. I don't feel like celebrating though. I'll still be here. But then again, I said that once before. Today I'm here. And today is all that matters.
Hey -
I was going to wait, but I think this needs to be said currently as I read and respond.
First - Keep your head up. You are a Human Being. You are not perfect (Hell neither am I). Yes I have been made to understand that in dealing with the Nic Lady that it is a life or death choice, but you had a slip before, and guess what. As of now you have survived. You came back, and you were a steadfast part of our Oct 12 madmen.
Second - you made it back when you wake up tomorrow. Under any circumtances, 100 days is a good feat and should be celebrated. As you have understood, yes it is not an end but a milestone along the way. If you see the Major League Baseball players they celebrate the division victory but it is not the end of what they are striving for. So treat it as the same, don't discount it.
Am proud to have you in our group, and hope to see you there for the days to come....like getting to that 2nd floor. Be Quit with you.
We're addicts.
We belong.
Learn from your past.
Quit for today.
Fuck tomorrow.
Don't hate yourself because you know what it is to fail. Use your past to inspire and let others know how hard you fall. It's why we're here :accountability. If falling didn't hurt, we'd never get stronger. Some of us have to see firsthand though. It's not ok. It's just a fact.
Set your safeties. Protect your friends. That's all we do here and you're doing it.
I'm proud of you man.
Keep it up, and don't let it happen again.
Bullshit, 100 days is awesome! Doesn't matter what happened last time, this time you are at 100 days. Millions of people haven't started day 1 yet. They are the failures. You swallowed your pride, took your licks and joined the Madmen. And we are glad you are here.
And WE are proud of you and proud to call you brother. Don't give a shit who disowned you last time, keep your eyes down range and on the goal, NEVER GOING BACK. We have had plenty of VETS dis-associate with our group over the past three months, don't put a whole lot of stock in whether or not they approve of what happened. You are here now, and you are quit. That is the only requirement for us in October. Promise us today, keep your word.
Now reach down and straighten your panties, and go share your experience with some new guys. Your story may be the encouragement they need to get through their first day. QLAFM with you, and CONGRATULATIONS BROTHER!!
-
tomorrow I hit 100. again. it's different this time around. i don't have the sense of pride. i have more of a realization that it's never over. 100 days. great. big fucking deal. 1,000 days... 10,000 days... 10,000 days is actually just over 27 years. I'll be 66. And I'll still be worried about caving. It never ends. I read a post from MThomas today about a conversation with his wife. It really resonated with me. I was there - except I didn't have a conversation. I had the same mindset he spoke of when he said he need to "leave the hospital" for a while. He was convinced to stick around. I wasn't. When I left, I failed. I didn't reach out to the people who cared about me. My wife. My friends. And most of all my support system here. i wasn't cured. We're never cured. This is a disease that we seek to manage. Not one that we can ever heal.
I appreciate all the support I've been given since I returned. It's come from all over. The Quitheads of August 11 have been tremendous in accepting me back. DChogs and Dante, especially. Others, like Luby, CBird, and Ready - they've been posting support for me from the beginning. I'm really honored by that support. I don't feel like I deserve it, but I'll always remember it. But my history still leaves an open scar. I'll never earn the faith and trust back of other quitters who were my friends and who I betrayed. guys like Souli and Sco... the first time around they were rocks for me. Now I'm invisible to them. And I earned that. I'll never be the quitter I imagined I would be because I failed.
Since I came back I've been, for the most part, inactive. I want to get the HOF behind me because I don't feel like I belong. I'm Pete Rose. I cheated. I'm Shoeless Joe. I disgraced the integrity of this place. I don't deserve the Hall. I understand now how Ed Romero felt when he came back and joined the Quitheads. I never got how he could come back and be silent. But now I get it. We cavers... we need this place; but we don't feel like we really belong again. At least that how I feel. Let this be a cautionary tale for those who are considering a cave. You can return - but you can never come all the way back.
I should be celebrating tomorrow. I don't feel like celebrating though. I'll still be here. But then again, I said that once before. Today I'm here. And today is all that matters.
Hey -
I was going to wait, but I think this needs to be said currently as I read and respond.
First - Keep your head up. You are a Human Being. You are not perfect (Hell neither am I). Yes I have been made to understand that in dealing with the Nic Lady that it is a life or death choice, but you had a slip before, and guess what. As of now you have survived. You came back, and you were a steadfast part of our Oct 12 madmen.
Second - you made it back when you wake up tomorrow. Under any circumtances, 100 days is a good feat and should be celebrated. As you have understood, yes it is not an end but a milestone along the way. If you see the Major League Baseball players they celebrate the division victory but it is not the end of what they are striving for. So treat it as the same, don't discount it.
Am proud to have you in our group, and hope to see you there for the days to come....like getting to that 2nd floor. Be Quit with you.
We're addicts.
We belong.
Learn from your past.
Quit for today.
Fuck tomorrow.
Don't hate yourself because you know what it is to fail. Use your past to inspire and let others know how hard you fall. It's why we're here :accountability. If falling didn't hurt, we'd never get stronger. Some of us have to see firsthand though. It's not ok. It's just a fact.
Set your safeties. Protect your friends. That's all we do here and you're doing it.
I'm proud of you man.
Keep it up, and don't let it happen again.
Bullshit, 100 days is awesome! Doesn't matter what happened last time, this time you are at 100 days. Millions of people haven't started day 1 yet. They are the failures. You swallowed your pride, took your licks and joined the Madmen. And we are glad you are here.
And WE are proud of you and proud to call you brother. Don't give a shit who disowned you last time, keep your eyes down range and on the goal, NEVER GOING BACK. We have had plenty of VETS dis-associate with our group over the past three months, don't put a whole lot of stock in whether or not they approve of what happened. You are here now, and you are quit. That is the only requirement for us in October. Promise us today, keep your word.
Now reach down and straighten your panties, and go share your experience with some new guys. Your story may be the encouragement they need to get through their first day. QLAFM with you, and CONGRATULATIONS BROTHER!!
Read your post last night and started to respond then but I decided to sleep on it, didn't change what I have to say. First off you are welcome for the support, I will do anything to keep you quit, and I will once again reiterate I would not be quit without the advice I got from you early in my quit. Think about that. I am at 448 today, you helped make that happen. I am sorry you are still feeling like you are not all the way back and I don't want to be a dick but that is on you. You have earned your quit every day just like the rest of us and you have chosen not to let yourself be all the way back. You are a damn fine quitter and you have a lot to share, if you do that you will be back and even better than before because you have made the mistake we all fear, you can tell us how to avoid it, you have a ton to offer.
Either way I am glad you are back, congrats on the HoF, you've earned it, you should celebrate.
Damn proud to quit with you all damn day.
-
tomorrow I hit 100. again. it's different this time around. i don't have the sense of pride. i have more of a realization that it's never over. 100 days. great. big fucking deal. 1,000 days... 10,000 days... 10,000 days is actually just over 27 years. I'll be 66. And I'll still be worried about caving. It never ends. I read a post from MThomas today about a conversation with his wife. It really resonated with me. I was there - except I didn't have a conversation. I had the same mindset he spoke of when he said he need to "leave the hospital" for a while. He was convinced to stick around. I wasn't. When I left, I failed. I didn't reach out to the people who cared about me. My wife. My friends. And most of all my support system here. i wasn't cured. We're never cured. This is a disease that we seek to manage. Not one that we can ever heal.
I appreciate all the support I've been given since I returned. It's come from all over. The Quitheads of August 11 have been tremendous in accepting me back. DChogs and Dante, especially. Others, like Luby, CBird, and Ready - they've been posting support for me from the beginning. I'm really honored by that support. I don't feel like I deserve it, but I'll always remember it. But my history still leaves an open scar. I'll never earn the faith and trust back of other quitters who were my friends and who I betrayed. guys like Souli and Sco... the first time around they were rocks for me. Now I'm invisible to them. And I earned that. I'll never be the quitter I imagined I would be because I failed.
Since I came back I've been, for the most part, inactive. I want to get the HOF behind me because I don't feel like I belong. I'm Pete Rose. I cheated. I'm Shoeless Joe. I disgraced the integrity of this place. I don't deserve the Hall. I understand now how Ed Romero felt when he came back and joined the Quitheads. I never got how he could come back and be silent. But now I get it. We cavers... we need this place; but we don't feel like we really belong again. At least that how I feel. Let this be a cautionary tale for those who are considering a cave. You can return - but you can never come all the way back.
I should be celebrating tomorrow. I don't feel like celebrating though. I'll still be here. But then again, I said that once before. Today I'm here. And today is all that matters.
Hey -
I was going to wait, but I think this needs to be said currently as I read and respond.
First - Keep your head up. You are a Human Being. You are not perfect (Hell neither am I). Yes I have been made to understand that in dealing with the Nic Lady that it is a life or death choice, but you had a slip before, and guess what. As of now you have survived. You came back, and you were a steadfast part of our Oct 12 madmen.
Second - you made it back when you wake up tomorrow. Under any circumtances, 100 days is a good feat and should be celebrated. As you have understood, yes it is not an end but a milestone along the way. If you see the Major League Baseball players they celebrate the division victory but it is not the end of what they are striving for. So treat it as the same, don't discount it.
Am proud to have you in our group, and hope to see you there for the days to come....like getting to that 2nd floor. Be Quit with you.
We're addicts.
We belong.
Learn from your past.
Quit for today.
Fuck tomorrow.
Don't hate yourself because you know what it is to fail. Use your past to inspire and let others know how hard you fall. It's why we're here :accountability. If falling didn't hurt, we'd never get stronger. Some of us have to see firsthand though. It's not ok. It's just a fact.
Set your safeties. Protect your friends. That's all we do here and you're doing it.
I'm proud of you man.
Keep it up, and don't let it happen again.
Bullshit, 100 days is awesome! Doesn't matter what happened last time, this time you are at 100 days. Millions of people haven't started day 1 yet. They are the failures. You swallowed your pride, took your licks and joined the Madmen. And we are glad you are here.
And WE are proud of you and proud to call you brother. Don't give a shit who disowned you last time, keep your eyes down range and on the goal, NEVER GOING BACK. We have had plenty of VETS dis-associate with our group over the past three months, don't put a whole lot of stock in whether or not they approve of what happened. You are here now, and you are quit. That is the only requirement for us in October. Promise us today, keep your word.
Now reach down and straighten your panties, and go share your experience with some new guys. Your story may be the encouragement they need to get through their first day. QLAFM with you, and CONGRATULATIONS BROTHER!!
Read your post last night and started to respond then but I decided to sleep on it, didn't change what I have to say. First off you are welcome for the support, I will do anything to keep you quit, and I will once again reiterate I would not be quit without the advice I got from you early in my quit. Think about that. I am at 448 today, you helped make that happen. I am sorry you are still feeling like you are not all the way back and I don't want to be a dick but that is on you. You have earned your quit every day just like the rest of us and you have chosen not to let yourself be all the way back. You are a damn fine quitter and you have a lot to share, if you do that you will be back and even better than before because you have made the mistake we all fear, you can tell us how to avoid it, you have a ton to offer.
Either way I am glad you are back, congrats on the HoF, you've earned it, you should celebrate.
Damn proud to quit with you all damn day.
Per - I was making my rounds through KTC last pm, looking for vaginas that need a shot of penicillin or some hurt vagina cream, when I came across your post. At first glance I thought you might be developing some HOF vaginitis, but then I saw all the bad asses that have your back. JAG's diagnosis is correct - you don't need a tube of ointment - you need to pull those lacy panties down some. Better yet, tear em off and let that stanky cooch get some fresh air.
Boldly wear the "R" on your shirt. There are retreads around that now, no one knows they were retreads. They quietly came back and now watch from the sidelines. Weighed down by some imaginary guilt stone. That's fine. They are solid quitters. There are others, who put their "R" shirt on everyday and make sure everyone knows it. They have shared their story so much, that everyone knows what happened. They do it to guide others, and, to never forget. There is one supporting you in this thread. Not gonna say his name but he has a metal jaw and enjoys hiney sechs with HeMan. We all can recite his story almost verbatim.
Per - I'm not going to cup your scrotum - I only help vaginas - but it is evident to everyone that you fall into the latter category of retreads. But thats your choice. How about starting with some support in Jan 13? Those fogturds need some direction.
Vadge
-
tomorrow I hit 100. again. it's different this time around. i don't have the sense of pride. i have more of a realization that it's never over. 100 days. great. big fucking deal. 1,000 days... 10,000 days... 10,000 days is actually just over 27 years. I'll be 66. And I'll still be worried about caving. It never ends. I read a post from MThomas today about a conversation with his wife. It really resonated with me. I was there - except I didn't have a conversation. I had the same mindset he spoke of when he said he need to "leave the hospital" for a while. He was convinced to stick around. I wasn't. When I left, I failed. I didn't reach out to the people who cared about me. My wife. My friends. And most of all my support system here. i wasn't cured. We're never cured. This is a disease that we seek to manage. Not one that we can ever heal.
I appreciate all the support I've been given since I returned. It's come from all over. The Quitheads of August 11 have been tremendous in accepting me back. DChogs and Dante, especially. Others, like Luby, CBird, and Ready - they've been posting support for me from the beginning. I'm really honored by that support. I don't feel like I deserve it, but I'll always remember it. But my history still leaves an open scar. I'll never earn the faith and trust back of other quitters who were my friends and who I betrayed. guys like Souli and Sco... the first time around they were rocks for me. Now I'm invisible to them. And I earned that. I'll never be the quitter I imagined I would be because I failed.
Since I came back I've been, for the most part, inactive. I want to get the HOF behind me because I don't feel like I belong. I'm Pete Rose. I cheated. I'm Shoeless Joe. I disgraced the integrity of this place. I don't deserve the Hall. I understand now how Ed Romero felt when he came back and joined the Quitheads. I never got how he could come back and be silent. But now I get it. We cavers... we need this place; but we don't feel like we really belong again. At least that how I feel. Let this be a cautionary tale for those who are considering a cave. You can return - but you can never come all the way back.
I should be celebrating tomorrow. I don't feel like celebrating though. I'll still be here. But then again, I said that once before. Today I'm here. And today is all that matters.
Hey -
I was going to wait, but I think this needs to be said currently as I read and respond.
First - Keep your head up. You are a Human Being. You are not perfect (Hell neither am I). Yes I have been made to understand that in dealing with the Nic Lady that it is a life or death choice, but you had a slip before, and guess what. As of now you have survived. You came back, and you were a steadfast part of our Oct 12 madmen.
Second - you made it back when you wake up tomorrow. Under any circumtances, 100 days is a good feat and should be celebrated. As you have understood, yes it is not an end but a milestone along the way. If you see the Major League Baseball players they celebrate the division victory but it is not the end of what they are striving for. So treat it as the same, don't discount it.
Am proud to have you in our group, and hope to see you there for the days to come....like getting to that 2nd floor. Be Quit with you.
We're addicts.
We belong.
Learn from your past.
Quit for today.
Fuck tomorrow.
Don't hate yourself because you know what it is to fail. Use your past to inspire and let others know how hard you fall. It's why we're here :accountability. If falling didn't hurt, we'd never get stronger. Some of us have to see firsthand though. It's not ok. It's just a fact.
Set your safeties. Protect your friends. That's all we do here and you're doing it.
I'm proud of you man.
Keep it up, and don't let it happen again.
Bullshit, 100 days is awesome! Doesn't matter what happened last time, this time you are at 100 days. Millions of people haven't started day 1 yet. They are the failures. You swallowed your pride, took your licks and joined the Madmen. And we are glad you are here.
And WE are proud of you and proud to call you brother. Don't give a shit who disowned you last time, keep your eyes down range and on the goal, NEVER GOING BACK. We have had plenty of VETS dis-associate with our group over the past three months, don't put a whole lot of stock in whether or not they approve of what happened. You are here now, and you are quit. That is the only requirement for us in October. Promise us today, keep your word.
Now reach down and straighten your panties, and go share your experience with some new guys. Your story may be the encouragement they need to get through their first day. QLAFM with you, and CONGRATULATIONS BROTHER!!
Read your post last night and started to respond then but I decided to sleep on it, didn't change what I have to say. First off you are welcome for the support, I will do anything to keep you quit, and I will once again reiterate I would not be quit without the advice I got from you early in my quit. Think about that. I am at 448 today, you helped make that happen. I am sorry you are still feeling like you are not all the way back and I don't want to be a dick but that is on you. You have earned your quit every day just like the rest of us and you have chosen not to let yourself be all the way back. You are a damn fine quitter and you have a lot to share, if you do that you will be back and even better than before because you have made the mistake we all fear, you can tell us how to avoid it, you have a ton to offer.
Either way I am glad you are back, congrats on the HoF, you've earned it, you should celebrate.
Damn proud to quit with you all damn day.
Per - I was making my rounds through KTC last pm, looking for vaginas that need a shot of penicillin or some hurt vagina cream, when I came across your post. At first glance I thought you might be developing some HOF vaginitis, but then I saw all the bad asses that have your back. JAG's diagnosis is correct - you don't need a tube of ointment - you need to pull those lacy panties down some. Better yet, tear em off and let that stanky cooch get some fresh air.
Boldly wear the "R" on your shirt. There are retreads around that now, no one knows they were retreads. They quietly came back and now watch from the sidelines. Weighed down by some imaginary guilt stone. That's fine. They are solid quitters. There are others, who put their "R" shirt on everyday and make sure everyone knows it. They have shared their story so much, that everyone knows what happened. They do it to guide others, and, to never forget. There is one supporting you in this thread. Not gonna say his name but he has a metal jaw and enjoys hiney sechs with HeMan. We all can recite his story almost verbatim.
Per - I'm not going to cup your scrotum - I only help vaginas - but it is evident to everyone that you fall into the latter category of retreads. But thats your choice. How about starting with some support in Jan 13? Those fogturds need some direction.
Vadge
Thanks for bringing the quit again. If she whispers in you ear, stomp on her face. ;)
-
So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.
I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."
Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.
The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.
Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.
And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:
We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.
Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.
-
Glad you're back. Thanks for sharing.
-
I quit with you Per. Let's fucking kill this bro.
-
Per, thanks for sharing your story! I am sure it wasn't easy, but it is very much appreciated!
Glad that you came back!
Kuss
-
A great story. One EVERYONE needs to hear. And one YOU better never forget again.
-
Thank you! That's what I'm talking about. Your advice helped me quit, your cave shook me, and now your advice on how to avoid your mistakes has helped me again.
Again thank you, you have so much do offer our community.
-
So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.
I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."
Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.
The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.
Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.
And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:
We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.
Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.
I remember you coming back, hit me for some reason, made me scared. But it also made me remember that I'm an addict and I will always be one, and because of that, my guard will be up 24/7 and strong, like Ox. Thanks for sharing Per, you're the man, October and ktc is stronger because you are here.
-
Per thank you for sharing! I know that was damn hard to share! It was pretty damn hard to read also, it makes me realize how vulnerable we addicts are! I don't understand how Anyone can think they are in the clear and free from their addiction. When I was young I stopped for over 3 1/2 yrs ( thats right 1300+ days) and I did exactly what you did. Your story was Déjà vu for me!
-
So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.
I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."
Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.
The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.
Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.
And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:
We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.
Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.
Bad.fucking.ass.
Thank You.
-
So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.
I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."
Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.
The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.
Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.
And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:
We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.
Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.
Bad.fucking.ass.
Thank You.
Per Thanks for sharing my heart goes out to you but sounds like you are in control, and that memory is planted deep and you will never try that one dip again!!!!!
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Thanks for the post Per, i've been fitting that "just one" temptation a lot already this week. I applaud you for sharing that with us
-
So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.
I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."
Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.
The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.
Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.
And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:
We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.
Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.
Bad.fucking.ass.
Thank You.
-
Per- Thanks a million for sharing that tragic story with us my heart goes out to you but sounds like you are really in control this time, and should be a warning to all what can happen and continued posting can be a very effective tool as well as being with others that Quit and seeing what can HAPPEN !!!!
-
So I've been encouraged by others to share my story as a retread. I'm not happy about it. I don't like being a retread. I was in the August 11 Quithead group and I was damn fucking proud to be in that group. It meant a lot to me. I took great pride in being a part of that group. I made it past a year.
I made it 411 days. And then I caved. Why? Becuase I thought "I can have just one."
Now... being quit for 411 days, I was convinced that I can have just one. I'll spend the five bucks and buy a tin, have one dip, and pitch the can. Right? It's like a luxury purchase. Five bucks for a dip... no biggie. I hadn't posted roll in a while - I had "left the hospital." It wouldn't matter if I had "just one." Here's the problem. When I spit that dip out, I still had the tin. Easily 7-10 dips left in that can. I had already done one. Why throw away five bucks? I can have one a day for the next 10 days, and then I'll throw it out. Good idea Per. Celebrate that idea with another dip! You can have one a day for the next nine days. You'll be fine. It's just one more. But then later that night, after realizing I've thrown away 411 days of quit, I get depressed. Why bother anymore? Might as well just finish this can as quickly as possible and then start my quit all over again from day one. The next morning I'm committed to finishing the can and starting day one the following day.
The problem was, I finished that can at around 4:00. Can't drive home like that. I'm going to quit TOMORROW! Not today. I need to time this perfectly. I'll buy another tin and be sure to finish it before the night is out. that way, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I won't have a tin anymore and it will be easy to start with day 1 again.
Here's the catch. I never finished that tin that night. I did the right thing - I threw it out. But if it were REALLY the right thing, I would have dumped it out. nope. part of me knew that I wasn't going to quit. I may as well have simply placed the can gently on the top of the garbage pile, because in the morning I did some dumpster diving. I'll quit tomorrow. How quickly that addicted mind comes back to "I'll quit tomorrow." Tomorrow never comes.
And how did this all start? Arrogance. Overconfidence. I can have "just one." That one turned into one tin. Then it snowballed. I realize this is a rambling post... sorry. Here's the upshot:
We do NOT have control over our addiction. We only have control over our CHOICES. Our addiction will ALWAYS be there. We CHOOSE NOT to surrender to that addiction. The second you believe you have control over your addiction, it's over. Your cave has already started. We don't own our addiction. We own free will. Never believe you have control over your addiction. Control the choices you make and your addiction will never gain strength.
Please, I'm begging you, do NOT throw away what you've accomplished. If you've been quit for one day or 1,000 days, don't throw it away. Now I'm proud to be part of the Madmen of October and have another 100 days under my belt. And I can gaurantee that I will never believe that "just one" will be just one. It won't. It just won't. There is no such thing as "just one." I promise.
Bad.fucking.ass.
Thank You.
Let's fucking do this today.
I am very proud of you. There is nothing harder than owning your past, and sometimes that past will come back and try to consume you. Don't let it.
Learn from your past.
Quit for today.
Fuck tomorrow.
There's a lot of people that return to this site. That doesn't make them a retread.
A retread is:
---A badass motherfucker that can admit that he gave up the keys to freedom once
--knows why he failed and is taking steps not to repeat those mistakes again
--vows to protect his quit (and lives those words out)
--helps others understand what failure is and how to rise above it
You, sir, are officially a retread. Congratulations.
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Thanks for sharing per. Lots of useful info here and good reminder to never let down our guard, proud to be quit with you today.
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Thanks for writing and posting this Per.
-
Thanks for sharing. Always remember why you are here...
Never forget you are an addict. You are NEVER cured.
STAY QUIT
Greg
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There is no question, you were meant to be here. Thanks for sharing. Keep bringing the quit.
-
I quit with you today.
-
"I love copenhagen more than I love my kids."
I've thought about that sentence for two weeks now. And I know that if you put a shotgun at my scrotum, I would tell you to pull the trigger before those words ever came out of my mouth. It's powerful. When I wrote the words I clearly had to think the words, and thinking the words - saying them in my head - is awful, but doable. But I've tried to say them out loud. I can't. I mean, I can - I know the lyrics - but I can't. It's like fucking Fonzie saying "wrong." If you have someone you love - I mean REALLY REALLY fucking love with every ounce of your being, and you feel the craving, try to say those words OUT LOUD. And don't let yourself have that dip until you do.
I went to the ENT today. First time in my life. My jaw has been hurting pretty fucking badly for a couple of weeks now, and I've had this bloody mucus for some time - so I figured it was probably time to get checked. The good news is, he found nothing of concern in my mouth. Nose polyps - big fucking giant ones - but that's it. Bad news is there's definitely bleeding below the voice box. Either esophogeal or tracheobrochial (reading from the report here). Next step is a barium swallow and chest x-ray, then a head MRI. We'll see what happens. As I told Luby, I'm going with "it's fine" until I hear differently. (and I want to be clear, I don't want "prayers for you" or "in my thoughts per" - cdaniels deserved that, not me. I'm just a chicken-shit with a nose bleed).
It will come as no surprise that I'm hoping it's fine. And I'm pretty fucking positive that it is all fine - but that small little percentage of "what if" has steeled my quit. It's been 218 days since I quit. I had a run of quitTING in me back in 2011. All in all - I've dipped for 2 weeks out of the past 21 months. So if this does turn out to be "something" it just cements the concept of "it only takes one." So.. you know... never again. For any reason.
These past two weeks I've been looking at my kids a little bit longer. Like I said, I'm pretty fucking positive it's nothing. But what if, right? And I constantly think of what I may very well have done to them. How my actions may very well have ruined their lives - or at least drastically changed them forever. I've seen quit brothers talk about the moment when they "know" the door is closed. These past two weeks have not been a door closing. It's a burial (without the prerequisite bagpipes). This bitch has been buried becuase of a stupid scare that's probably nothing. But if it is nothing I cannot be more thankful for that scare. And I know there will be times ahead of me where I'll get the ghost of the nic bitch whispering in my ear. But she's dead and buried now. Don't get me wrong, I'm on guard for the ghost. But there's one sentence I won't ever say - and that sentence is the only way dip can re-enter my life.
-
I didn't post roll yesterday. It bores me now. I have other things going on in my life so I don't need to post roll every day. Or at least I don't need to make it a priority. If I have time or if I think about it, I'll post roll. But if I have something better to do, then I'll do that instead. I'm quit 330 days today. I don't need to be here every day. For what? To post roll and leave?
This is my mental battle every day. I know it's the addict in me trying to retake control.
But part of it is accurate. Posting roll DOES bore me now. Because I frequently only have time to post roll and leave, I often think "why bother?" The thing is, I DO need to be here everyday, but posting roll and leaving isn't being here. And if I can't "be here" then I become apathetic about posting roll. But then again, that's where I found myself in June of last year... being apathetic about posting roll, then skipping out for a while... then dancing with the nic bitch and starting all over again.
I received an email from Luby yesterday, basically admonishing me for being inconsistent and weak in my quit. Telling me I better get my ass back in here and be active or I was going to fail again. Not his exact words, but that's how I took them. And I think that's how he meant them. I was pissed. Fuck you man. I don't have time for this shit. It's not a 2 minute roll post for me. If I can't be all-in I'm not going to half-ass it.
No. I didn't post roll yesterday. But Luby bothered me all fucking night. Because he was right. And I'm a douchebag. What I came to realize was that - for me - posting roll is NOT "per034 - day xxx". Posting roll - for me - is reading intros and commenting on threads and popping into chat. Technically, posting roll is "per034 - day xxx" But that don't mean shit to me and my quit. I realized last night that, in order for me to post roll, I need to be here. Fuck I've talked about "being here" so many fucking times in the past 2+ years. I sound like a broken record. But I think Luby knocked something loose. I need to post roll my way and the right way. They aren't one and the same.
Keep kicking me in the balls Luby. It's not wasted on me.
per034 - Day 330.
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I quit with you today, Per, nicely said. Good to see you.
-
I didn't post roll yesterday. It bores me now. I have other things going on in my life so I don't need to post roll every day. Or at least I don't need to make it a priority. If I have time or if I think about it, I'll post roll. But if I have something better to do, then I'll do that instead. I'm quit 330 days today. I don't need to be here every day. For what? To post roll and leave?
This is my mental battle every day. I know it's the addict in me trying to retake control.
But part of it is accurate. Posting roll DOES bore me now. Because I frequently only have time to post roll and leave, I often think "why bother?" The thing is, I DO need to be here everyday, but posting roll and leaving isn't being here. And if I can't "be here" then I become apathetic about posting roll. But then again, that's where I found myself in June of last year... being apathetic about posting roll, then skipping out for a while... then dancing with the nic bitch and starting all over again.
I received an email from Luby yesterday, basically admonishing me for being inconsistent and weak in my quit. Telling me I better get my ass back in here and be active or I was going to fail again. Not his exact words, but that's how I took them. And I think that's how he meant them. I was pissed. Fuck you man. I don't have time for this shit. It's not a 2 minute roll post for me. If I can't be all-in I'm not going to half-ass it.
No. I didn't post roll yesterday. But Luby bothered me all fucking night. Because he was right. And I'm a douchebag. What I came to realize was that - for me - posting roll is NOT "per034 - day xxx". Posting roll - for me - is reading intros and commenting on threads and popping into chat. Technically, posting roll is "per034 - day xxx" But that don't mean shit to me and my quit. I realized last night that, in order for me to post roll, I need to be here. Fuck I've talked about "being here" so many fucking times in the past 2+ years. I sound like a broken record. But I think Luby knocked something loose. I need to post roll my way and the right way. They aren't one and the same.
Keep kicking me in the balls Luby. It's not wasted on me.
per034 - Day 330.
Per - I have always admired your desire to be actively involved in this community. When you were quit with the Quitheads, you were always one of the first to spark discussion or share your thoughts. I believe your presence was beneficial to all our quits, as well as to many outside August 2011.
That being said, I think your "all or nothing" mentality is unrealistic. There will be days where you just cannot participate on this site as much as you would like. So what. Make up for it the next day if you are so worried about it.
Your disdain for "half-assing" it is what caused your last quit to fail. There is no way I can possibly express my gratitude for the vets of this site who consistently provide encouragement to first time quitters, rip new assholes for cavers, and do everything else in between to make this site what it is: a life line. I may be a shitty person for not paying it forward as much as others have, but my inability to actively participate 24/7 is not going to be an excuse for me to drift away from this site and eventually cave.
What three-item list do you see more than anything around KTC?
1) Post roll
2) Keep your word
3) Repeat
Nothing says you have to stop in chat for X number of minutes per day, or post X number of times per day. Ya, you may not be helping as many fellow quitters by not being involved here ALL THE TIME, but I'll guarantee you your kids and wife would rather you post roll, keep your word and repeat, versus the alternative of fading away from KTC and caving again.
I am sorry if this comes off as harsh. That is not my intent. I am a little surprised, however, that you appear to be falling into the same "boredom" that cost you your last quit. Please don't make the same mistake again.
Good seeing you in August 2011 this morning - don't be a stranger.
Parry
-
I didn't post roll yesterday. It bores me now. I have other things going on in my life so I don't need to post roll every day. Or at least I don't need to make it a priority. If I have time or if I think about it, I'll post roll. But if I have something better to do, then I'll do that instead. I'm quit 330 days today. I don't need to be here every day. For what? To post roll and leave?
This is my mental battle every day. I know it's the addict in me trying to retake control.
But part of it is accurate. Posting roll DOES bore me now. Because I frequently only have time to post roll and leave, I often think "why bother?" The thing is, I DO need to be here everyday, but posting roll and leaving isn't being here. And if I can't "be here" then I become apathetic about posting roll. But then again, that's where I found myself in June of last year... being apathetic about posting roll, then skipping out for a while... then dancing with the nic bitch and starting all over again.
I received an email from Luby yesterday, basically admonishing me for being inconsistent and weak in my quit. Telling me I better get my ass back in here and be active or I was going to fail again. Not his exact words, but that's how I took them. And I think that's how he meant them. I was pissed. Fuck you man. I don't have time for this shit. It's not a 2 minute roll post for me. If I can't be all-in I'm not going to half-ass it.
No. I didn't post roll yesterday. But Luby bothered me all fucking night. Because he was right. And I'm a douchebag. What I came to realize was that - for me - posting roll is NOT "per034 - day xxx". Posting roll - for me - is reading intros and commenting on threads and popping into chat. Technically, posting roll is "per034 - day xxx" But that don't mean shit to me and my quit. I realized last night that, in order for me to post roll, I need to be here. Fuck I've talked about "being here" so many fucking times in the past 2+ years. I sound like a broken record. But I think Luby knocked something loose. I need to post roll my way and the right way. They aren't one and the same.
Keep kicking me in the balls Luby. It's not wasted on me.
per034 - Day 330.
Per - I have always admired your desire to be actively involved in this community. When you were quit with the Quitheads, you were always one of the first to spark discussion or share your thoughts. I believe your presence was beneficial to all our quits, as well as to many outside August 2011.
That being said, I think your "all or nothing" mentality is unrealistic. There will be days where you just cannot participate on this site as much as you would like. So what. Make up for it the next day if you are so worried about it.
Your disdain for "half-assing" it is what caused your last quit to fail. There is no way I can possibly express my gratitude for the vets of this site who consistently provide encouragement to first time quitters, rip new assholes for cavers, and do everything else in between to make this site what it is: a life line. I may be a shitty person for not paying it forward as much as others have, but my inability to actively participate 24/7 is not going to be an excuse for me to drift away from this site and eventually cave.
What three-item list do you see more than anything around KTC?
1) Post roll
2) Keep your word
3) Repeat
Nothing says you have to stop in chat for X number of minutes per day, or post X number of times per day. Ya, you may not be helping as many fellow quitters by not being involved here ALL THE TIME, but I'll guarantee you your kids and wife would rather you post roll, keep your word and repeat, versus the alternative of fading away from KTC and caving again.
I am sorry if this comes off as harsh. That is not my intent. I am a little surprised, however, that you appear to be falling into the same "boredom" that cost you your last quit. Please don't make the same mistake again.
Good seeing you in August 2011 this morning - don't be a stranger.
Parry
two things:
1. per... this place is a shit-ton better with you here, active, and kickin' ass.
2. parry's right... if you post roll, it's off the table. so, you need to post roll every day.
i've spent the last year largely posting roll and bugging out. a new job with increased responsibilities continues to kick my ass during the day, and i'm exhausted enough at night to not have the energy to drop knowledge here. like you and parry, i do feel guilty about that, and i've enjoyed my recent burst of activity. but the benefits (to you and to those you help) of being active do not make the quickie post-and-run less significant to your quit.
posting roll makes you remember. posting roll steels your quit for the day. posting roll (yes, just posting roll) gives those you quit with a chaser of support to follow their quit shooter. june might be a bad month for you, brother.
my last piece of advice is that posting roll is as significant as you make it. you can throw down a "per- xxx" or you can throw down a "per- xxx- has anyone noticed how big luby's quit sack is?" shit, even the "per-xxx" can be super meaningful if you take a couple seconds to think about what posting those 7 characters really MEANS.
so, like parry said, don't hold yourself up to impossible standards... sometimes that can be the nic bitch purposefully setting you up to fail so that "just one" become more of a reality. folks get busy, work can suck, but KTC quitters are always quitting.
good to see you...
-
I didn't post roll yesterday. It bores me now. I have other things going on in my life so I don't need to post roll every day. Or at least I don't need to make it a priority. If I have time or if I think about it, I'll post roll. But if I have something better to do, then I'll do that instead. I'm quit 330 days today. I don't need to be here every day. For what? To post roll and leave?
This is my mental battle every day. I know it's the addict in me trying to retake control.
But part of it is accurate. Posting roll DOES bore me now. Because I frequently only have time to post roll and leave, I often think "why bother?" The thing is, I DO need to be here everyday, but posting roll and leaving isn't being here. And if I can't "be here" then I become apathetic about posting roll. But then again, that's where I found myself in June of last year... being apathetic about posting roll, then skipping out for a while... then dancing with the nic bitch and starting all over again.
I received an email from Luby yesterday, basically admonishing me for being inconsistent and weak in my quit. Telling me I better get my ass back in here and be active or I was going to fail again. Not his exact words, but that's how I took them. And I think that's how he meant them. I was pissed. Fuck you man. I don't have time for this shit. It's not a 2 minute roll post for me. If I can't be all-in I'm not going to half-ass it.
No. I didn't post roll yesterday. But Luby bothered me all fucking night. Because he was right. And I'm a douchebag. What I came to realize was that - for me - posting roll is NOT "per034 - day xxx". Posting roll - for me - is reading intros and commenting on threads and popping into chat. Technically, posting roll is "per034 - day xxx" But that don't mean shit to me and my quit. I realized last night that, in order for me to post roll, I need to be here. Fuck I've talked about "being here" so many fucking times in the past 2+ years. I sound like a broken record. But I think Luby knocked something loose. I need to post roll my way and the right way. They aren't one and the same.
Keep kicking me in the balls Luby. It's not wasted on me.
per034 - Day 330.
Per - I have always admired your desire to be actively involved in this community. When you were quit with the Quitheads, you were always one of the first to spark discussion or share your thoughts. I believe your presence was beneficial to all our quits, as well as to many outside August 2011.
That being said, I think your "all or nothing" mentality is unrealistic. There will be days where you just cannot participate on this site as much as you would like. So what. Make up for it the next day if you are so worried about it.
Your disdain for "half-assing" it is what caused your last quit to fail. There is no way I can possibly express my gratitude for the vets of this site who consistently provide encouragement to first time quitters, rip new assholes for cavers, and do everything else in between to make this site what it is: a life line. I may be a shitty person for not paying it forward as much as others have, but my inability to actively participate 24/7 is not going to be an excuse for me to drift away from this site and eventually cave.
What three-item list do you see more than anything around KTC?
1) Post roll
2) Keep your word
3) Repeat
Nothing says you have to stop in chat for X number of minutes per day, or post X number of times per day. Ya, you may not be helping as many fellow quitters by not being involved here ALL THE TIME, but I'll guarantee you your kids and wife would rather you post roll, keep your word and repeat, versus the alternative of fading away from KTC and caving again.
I am sorry if this comes off as harsh. That is not my intent. I am a little surprised, however, that you appear to be falling into the same "boredom" that cost you your last quit. Please don't make the same mistake again.
Good seeing you in August 2011 this morning - don't be a stranger.
Parry
two things:
1. per... this place is a shit-ton better with you here, active, and kickin' ass.
2. parry's right... if you post roll, it's off the table. so, you need to post roll every day.
i've spent the last year largely posting roll and bugging out. a new job with increased responsibilities continues to kick my ass during the day, and i'm exhausted enough at night to not have the energy to drop knowledge here. like you and parry, i do feel guilty about that, and i've enjoyed my recent burst of activity. but the benefits (to you and to those you help) of being active do not make the quickie post-and-run less significant to your quit.
posting roll makes you remember. posting roll steels your quit for the day. posting roll (yes, just posting roll) gives those you quit with a chaser of support to follow their quit shooter. june might be a bad month for you, brother.
my last piece of advice is that posting roll is as significant as you make it. you can throw down a "per- xxx" or you can throw down a "per- xxx- has anyone noticed how big luby's quit sack is?" shit, even the "per-xxx" can be super meaningful if you take a couple seconds to think about what posting those 7 characters really MEANS.
so, like parry said, don't hold yourself up to impossible standards... sometimes that can be the nic bitch purposefully setting you up to fail so that "just one" become more of a reality. folks get busy, work can suck, but KTC quitters are always quitting.
good to see you...
Just got done with the 5 hour drive from hell through traffic and shitty rainy weather, the same drive that scared the shit out of me early in my quit, now I won't say it doesn't bother me but I have the tools to deal with it. Early in my quit a lot of those tools were shown to me by per in my intro thread. I don't think he knew at the time how much his early advice to me meant, why would he, he was trying to help but he didn't know I clung to some of that advice during some of my darkest hours. Probably why I reacted to his cave the way I did, I basically blew a gasket but when he started showing the quit balls again I was all in, I'd do anything to help....
My email yesterday wasn't meant to piss you off, I did intend to call you out because I was worried about you. I wasn't paying attention when you caved before but you owned that shit and told everyone how it happened (which in and of itself was a tremendous learning experience for me, I recognized things I myself was doing) so I wanted to help head that off if I could. Did I mean to piss you off, not really but I am glad I did. This place is better with you a part of it. Just like its a better place when I am here more. This is real life we are not always gonna have time to give this place the effort it deserves or to give every newby the advice we have lived to tell but anything we can give back and pay forward is gonna help this battle we are in together.
Damn proud to quit with Per today
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I didn't post roll yesterday. It bores me now. I have other things going on in my life so I don't need to post roll every day. Or at least I don't need to make it a priority. If I have time or if I think about it, I'll post roll. But if I have something better to do, then I'll do that instead. I'm quit 330 days today. I don't need to be here every day. For what? To post roll and leave?
This is my mental battle every day. I know it's the addict in me trying to retake control.
But part of it is accurate. Posting roll DOES bore me now. Because I frequently only have time to post roll and leave, I often think "why bother?" The thing is, I DO need to be here everyday, but posting roll and leaving isn't being here. And if I can't "be here" then I become apathetic about posting roll. But then again, that's where I found myself in June of last year... being apathetic about posting roll, then skipping out for a while... then dancing with the nic bitch and starting all over again.
I received an email from Luby yesterday, basically admonishing me for being inconsistent and weak in my quit. Telling me I better get my ass back in here and be active or I was going to fail again. Not his exact words, but that's how I took them. And I think that's how he meant them. I was pissed. Fuck you man. I don't have time for this shit. It's not a 2 minute roll post for me. If I can't be all-in I'm not going to half-ass it.
No. I didn't post roll yesterday. But Luby bothered me all fucking night. Because he was right. And I'm a douchebag. What I came to realize was that - for me - posting roll is NOT "per034 - day xxx". Posting roll - for me - is reading intros and commenting on threads and popping into chat. Technically, posting roll is "per034 - day xxx" But that don't mean shit to me and my quit. I realized last night that, in order for me to post roll, I need to be here. Fuck I've talked about "being here" so many fucking times in the past 2+ years. I sound like a broken record. But I think Luby knocked something loose. I need to post roll my way and the right way. They aren't one and the same.
Keep kicking me in the balls Luby. It's not wasted on me.
per034 - Day 330.
Per - I have always admired your desire to be actively involved in this community. When you were quit with the Quitheads, you were always one of the first to spark discussion or share your thoughts. I believe your presence was beneficial to all our quits, as well as to many outside August 2011.
That being said, I think your "all or nothing" mentality is unrealistic. There will be days where you just cannot participate on this site as much as you would like. So what. Make up for it the next day if you are so worried about it.
Your disdain for "half-assing" it is what caused your last quit to fail. There is no way I can possibly express my gratitude for the vets of this site who consistently provide encouragement to first time quitters, rip new assholes for cavers, and do everything else in between to make this site what it is: a life line. I may be a shitty person for not paying it forward as much as others have, but my inability to actively participate 24/7 is not going to be an excuse for me to drift away from this site and eventually cave.
What three-item list do you see more than anything around KTC?
1) Post roll
2) Keep your word
3) Repeat
Nothing says you have to stop in chat for X number of minutes per day, or post X number of times per day. Ya, you may not be helping as many fellow quitters by not being involved here ALL THE TIME, but I'll guarantee you your kids and wife would rather you post roll, keep your word and repeat, versus the alternative of fading away from KTC and caving again.
I am sorry if this comes off as harsh. That is not my intent. I am a little surprised, however, that you appear to be falling into the same "boredom" that cost you your last quit. Please don't make the same mistake again.
Good seeing you in August 2011 this morning - don't be a stranger.
Parry
two things:
1. per... this place is a shit-ton better with you here, active, and kickin' ass.
2. parry's right... if you post roll, it's off the table. so, you need to post roll every day.
i've spent the last year largely posting roll and bugging out. a new job with increased responsibilities continues to kick my ass during the day, and i'm exhausted enough at night to not have the energy to drop knowledge here. like you and parry, i do feel guilty about that, and i've enjoyed my recent burst of activity. but the benefits (to you and to those you help) of being active do not make the quickie post-and-run less significant to your quit.
posting roll makes you remember. posting roll steels your quit for the day. posting roll (yes, just posting roll) gives those you quit with a chaser of support to follow their quit shooter. june might be a bad month for you, brother.
my last piece of advice is that posting roll is as significant as you make it. you can throw down a "per- xxx" or you can throw down a "per- xxx- has anyone noticed how big luby's quit sack is?" shit, even the "per-xxx" can be super meaningful if you take a couple seconds to think about what posting those 7 characters really MEANS.
so, like parry said, don't hold yourself up to impossible standards... sometimes that can be the nic bitch purposefully setting you up to fail so that "just one" become more of a reality. folks get busy, work can suck, but KTC quitters are always quitting.
good to see you...
Thanks guys. I really appreciate you taking the time to respond to this and I do miss the brotherhood I fucked up with you.
I'm going to post roll daily. My point was simply that getting on and off is not as effective for me. I'm not suggesting I need to quantify the time I spend here. I'm just saying I need to actually be here more often. I'm sure Scott Macek posted roll and left for all 105 days he was quit before caving out of the Quitheads.
I just need more. I'll keep posting roll - and will be more consistent. But I need to be more active to keep my quit tighter.
-
I didn't post roll yesterday. It bores me now. I have other things going on in my life so I don't need to post roll every day. Or at least I don't need to make it a priority. If I have time or if I think about it, I'll post roll. But if I have something better to do, then I'll do that instead. I'm quit 330 days today. I don't need to be here every day. For what? To post roll and leave?
This is my mental battle every day. I know it's the addict in me trying to retake control.
But part of it is accurate. Posting roll DOES bore me now. Because I frequently only have time to post roll and leave, I often think "why bother?" The thing is, I DO need to be here everyday, but posting roll and leaving isn't being here. And if I can't "be here" then I become apathetic about posting roll. But then again, that's where I found myself in June of last year... being apathetic about posting roll, then skipping out for a while... then dancing with the nic bitch and starting all over again.
I received an email from Luby yesterday, basically admonishing me for being inconsistent and weak in my quit. Telling me I better get my ass back in here and be active or I was going to fail again. Not his exact words, but that's how I took them. And I think that's how he meant them. I was pissed. Fuck you man. I don't have time for this shit. It's not a 2 minute roll post for me. If I can't be all-in I'm not going to half-ass it.
No. I didn't post roll yesterday. But Luby bothered me all fucking night. Because he was right. And I'm a douchebag. What I came to realize was that - for me - posting roll is NOT "per034 - day xxx". Posting roll - for me - is reading intros and commenting on threads and popping into chat. Technically, posting roll is "per034 - day xxx" But that don't mean shit to me and my quit. I realized last night that, in order for me to post roll, I need to be here. Fuck I've talked about "being here" so many fucking times in the past 2+ years. I sound like a broken record. But I think Luby knocked something loose. I need to post roll my way and the right way. They aren't one and the same.
Keep kicking me in the balls Luby. It's not wasted on me.
per034 - Day 330.
Per - I have always admired your desire to be actively involved in this community. When you were quit with the Quitheads, you were always one of the first to spark discussion or share your thoughts. I believe your presence was beneficial to all our quits, as well as to many outside August 2011.
That being said, I think your "all or nothing" mentality is unrealistic. There will be days where you just cannot participate on this site as much as you would like. So what. Make up for it the next day if you are so worried about it.
Your disdain for "half-assing" it is what caused your last quit to fail. There is no way I can possibly express my gratitude for the vets of this site who consistently provide encouragement to first time quitters, rip new assholes for cavers, and do everything else in between to make this site what it is: a life line. I may be a shitty person for not paying it forward as much as others have, but my inability to actively participate 24/7 is not going to be an excuse for me to drift away from this site and eventually cave.
What three-item list do you see more than anything around KTC?
1) Post roll
2) Keep your word
3) Repeat
Nothing says you have to stop in chat for X number of minutes per day, or post X number of times per day. Ya, you may not be helping as many fellow quitters by not being involved here ALL THE TIME, but I'll guarantee you your kids and wife would rather you post roll, keep your word and repeat, versus the alternative of fading away from KTC and caving again.
I am sorry if this comes off as harsh. That is not my intent. I am a little surprised, however, that you appear to be falling into the same "boredom" that cost you your last quit. Please don't make the same mistake again.
Good seeing you in August 2011 this morning - don't be a stranger.
Parry
two things:
1. per... this place is a shit-ton better with you here, active, and kickin' ass.
2. parry's right... if you post roll, it's off the table. so, you need to post roll every day.
i've spent the last year largely posting roll and bugging out. a new job with increased responsibilities continues to kick my ass during the day, and i'm exhausted enough at night to not have the energy to drop knowledge here. like you and parry, i do feel guilty about that, and i've enjoyed my recent burst of activity. but the benefits (to you and to those you help) of being active do not make the quickie post-and-run less significant to your quit.
posting roll makes you remember. posting roll steels your quit for the day. posting roll (yes, just posting roll) gives those you quit with a chaser of support to follow their quit shooter. june might be a bad month for you, brother.
my last piece of advice is that posting roll is as significant as you make it. you can throw down a "per- xxx" or you can throw down a "per- xxx- has anyone noticed how big luby's quit sack is?" shit, even the "per-xxx" can be super meaningful if you take a couple seconds to think about what posting those 7 characters really MEANS.
so, like parry said, don't hold yourself up to impossible standards... sometimes that can be the nic bitch purposefully setting you up to fail so that "just one" become more of a reality. folks get busy, work can suck, but KTC quitters are always quitting.
good to see you...
Thanks guys. I really appreciate you taking the time to respond to this and I do miss the brotherhood I fucked up with you.
I'm going to post roll daily. My point was simply that getting on and off is not as effective for me. I'm not suggesting I need to quantify the time I spend here. I'm just saying I need to actually be here more often. I'm sure Scott Macek posted roll and left for all 105 days he was quit before caving out of the Quitheads.
I just need more. I'll keep posting roll - and will be more consistent. But I need to be more active to keep my quit tighter.
per, that's good stuff. And I'm not talking about the part where luby kicks you in the sac. Made me think, and I don't think much.
-
love your quit lately, brother. i said it before, but it's worth saying again: this place is better with you active and dropping knowledge on folks.
proud to be quit with you. every day.
-
An Open Letter to New Quitters
Why are we dicks?
Over the past few weeks, I’ve seen a lot of negative reaction from you about the type of hard-love given on this site. I completely understand that reaction. We’re adults. New quitters and vets alike. We’re all adults here. Your reaction is usually an emotional one. “I came here because I thought I’d be getting support, not getting screamed at by a bunch of cyber-bully dickheads. Fuck you guys – I’m an adult! I don’t need you berating me!”
And you would be right. You are an adult. And you do not need us screaming at you. But here’s the point you really need to understand – We are not screaming at you, the new quitter. We are screaming at the addict inside of you. You need to recognize – as we do now – that there are two versions of you.
Version 1 is the new quitter who came here with every intention of ridding yourself of this awful affliction we’re all dealing with. This is the version we love and respect. This is the version that receives unyielding support. This is the version that gets “quit with” by supporters on roll-call. This is the version we reply to with phrases like “you got this” and “you’re doing great” and “day x is a tremendous accomplishment – keep it up!”
Then there’s Version 2. We all have this second version of ourselves. This is the version who likes dip – who never wanted to quit dip in the first place. This is the version who wants to finger the nic bitch every chance it gets. And THIS is the version we are all dicks to. We recognize when this version comes around. He (or she) is usually cavalier in his posting. Usually questions the methods we employ on this site. Is usually overwhelmingly arrogant and – at some point – believes “I don’t really need this site anymore.” That version of you wants to go back to nicotine. That version of you is fighting you for control over your addiction. And THAT is the version of you – and of us – that we hate.
This addiction – and our desire to eliminate it – results in a pretty significant internal struggle. This site – and the veteran support found here – is intended to help Version 1 of you defeat Version 2 of you. And yeah, sometimes (most of the times) we have to be dicks about it.
(I'm not quite sure where to post this so I'll leave it to the mods to re-classify, if necessary)
-
'worship'
Perfectly Stated.
-
Over the past few weeks, I’ve seen a lot of negative reaction from you about the type of hard-love given on this site. I completely understand that reaction. We’re adults. New quitters and vets alike. We’re all adults here. Your reaction is usually an emotional one. “I came here because I thought I’d be getting support, not getting screamed at by a bunch of cyber-bully dickheads. Fuck you guys – I’m an adult! I don’t need you berating me!”
And you would be right. You are an adult. And you do not need us screaming at you. But here’s the point you really need to understand – We are not screaming at you, the new quitter. We are screaming at the addict inside of you. You need to recognize – as we do now – that there are two versions of you.
Version 1 is the new quitter who came here with every intention of ridding yourself of this awful affliction we’re all dealing with. This is the version we love and respect. This is the version that receives unyielding support. This is the version that gets “quit with” by supporters on roll-call. This is the version we reply to with phrases like “you got this” and “you’re doing great” and “day x is a tremendous accomplishment – keep it up!”
Then there’s Version 2. We all have this second version of ourselves. This is the version who likes dip – who never wanted to quit dip in the first place. This is the version who wants to finger the nic bitch every chance it gets. And THIS is the version we are all dicks to. We recognize when this version comes around. He (or she) is usually cavalier in his posting. Usually questions the methods we employ on this site. Is usually overwhelmingly arrogant and – at some point – believes “I don’t really need this site anymore.” That version of you wants to go back to nicotine. That version of you is fighting you for control over your addiction. And THAT is the version of you – and of us – that we hate.
This addiction – and our desire to eliminate it – results in a pretty significant internal struggle. This site – and the veteran support found here – is intended to help Version 1 of you defeat Version 2 of you. And yeah, sometimes (most of the times) we have to be dicks about it.
(I'm not quite sure where to post this so I'll leave it to the mods to re-classify, if necessary)
As a new guy I will say that I think most addicts need tough reality! Addicts rarely get clean by coddling. Quitting is hard, that's why we put it off! If someone on this site had the power to make a person give up with words, then the addict wasn't ready or strong enough to quit. We need to be real! And real isn't always pretty or nice. Support is great, but that comes with the truth at the same time. Its a balance! Man up and work for this!
-
Over the past few weeks, I’ve seen a lot of negative reaction from you about the type of hard-love given on this site. I completely understand that reaction. We’re adults. New quitters and vets alike. We’re all adults here. Your reaction is usually an emotional one. “I came here because I thought I’d be getting support, not getting screamed at by a bunch of cyber-bully dickheads. Fuck you guys – I’m an adult! I don’t need you berating me!”
And you would be right. You are an adult. And you do not need us screaming at you. But here’s the point you really need to understand – We are not screaming at you, the new quitter. We are screaming at the addict inside of you. You need to recognize – as we do now – that there are two versions of you.
Version 1 is the new quitter who came here with every intention of ridding yourself of this awful affliction we’re all dealing with. This is the version we love and respect. This is the version that receives unyielding support. This is the version that gets “quit with” by supporters on roll-call. This is the version we reply to with phrases like “you got this” and “you’re doing great” and “day x is a tremendous accomplishment – keep it up!”
Then there’s Version 2. We all have this second version of ourselves. This is the version who likes dip – who never wanted to quit dip in the first place. This is the version who wants to finger the nic bitch every chance it gets. And THIS is the version we are all dicks to. We recognize when this version comes around. He (or she) is usually cavalier in his posting. Usually questions the methods we employ on this site. Is usually overwhelmingly arrogant and – at some point – believes “I don’t really need this site anymore.” That version of you wants to go back to nicotine. That version of you is fighting you for control over your addiction. And THAT is the version of you – and of us – that we hate.
This addiction – and our desire to eliminate it – results in a pretty significant internal struggle. This site – and the veteran support found here – is intended to help Version 1 of you defeat Version 2 of you. And yeah, sometimes (most of the times) we have to be dicks about it.
(I'm not quite sure where to post this so I'll leave it to the mods to re-classify, if necessary)
As a new guy I will say that I think most addicts need tough reality! Addicts rarely get clean by coddling. Quitting is hard, that's why we put it off! If someone on this site had the power to make a person give up with words, then the addict wasn't ready or strong enough to quit. We need to be real! And real isn't always pretty or nice. Support is great, but that comes with the truth at the same time. Its a balance! Man up and work for this!
#1 of me says thanks and I'll listen to whatever you got to say per.
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So well put...Love it! Version Number 1 is here to stay and I quit with you today PER!
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There's dicks on this site?
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There's dicks on this site?
And pussies.
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There's dicks on this site?
And pussies.
You got your chocolate in my peanut butter..... :o
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There's dicks on this site?
And pussies.
You got your chocolate in my peanut butter..... :o
I saw a pre-op tranny in chat once. Was scary.
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love your quit lately, brother. i said it before, but it's worth saying again: this place is better with you active and dropping knowledge on folks.
proud to be quit with you. every day.
X2
Don't fade into the sunset Per034!!! I'll hunt ur ass down!!!
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love your quit lately, brother. i said it before, but it's worth saying again: this place is better with you active and dropping knowledge on folks.
proud to be quit with you. every day.
X2
Don't fade into the sunset Per034!!! I'll hunt ur ass down!!!
Hunt his ass down. No activity since November.
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love your quit lately, brother. i said it before, but it's worth saying again: this place is better with you active and dropping knowledge on folks.
proud to be quit with you. every day.
X2
Don't fade into the sunset Per034!!! I'll hunt ur ass down!!!
Hunt his ass down. No activity since November.
Just sent him another text, lets see if he answers me this time.
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love your quit lately, brother. i said it before, but it's worth saying again: this place is better with you active and dropping knowledge on folks.
proud to be quit with you. every day.
X2
Don't fade into the sunset Per034!!! I'll hunt ur ass down!!!
Hunt his ass down. No activity since November.
Just sent him another text, lets see if he answers me this time.
I tried a couple times around the holiday's.... crickets. Hope he's ok, and quit.
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love your quit lately, brother. i said it before, but it's worth saying again: this place is better with you active and dropping knowledge on folks.
proud to be quit with you. every day.
X2
Don't fade into the sunset Per034!!! I'll hunt ur ass down!!!
Hunt his ass down. No activity since November.
Just sent him another text, lets see if he answers me this time.
I tried a couple times around the holiday's.... crickets. Hope he's ok, and quit.
He is responding, thinks his absence for so long won't be taken kindly. Has not said but sounds like still quit...but ????
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love your quit lately, brother. i said it before, but it's worth saying again: this place is better with you active and dropping knowledge on folks.
proud to be quit with you. every day.
X2
Don't fade into the sunset Per034!!! I'll hunt ur ass down!!!
Hunt his ass down. No activity since November.
Just sent him another text, lets see if he answers me this time.
I tried a couple times around the holiday's.... crickets. Hope he's ok, and quit.
He is responding, thinks his absence for so long won't be taken kindly. Has not said but sounds like still quit...but ????
I'm here. And still quit on day 607. Thanks for checking in. I think I've replied to every text from a brother while gone. If I didn't it was not intentional. Good to check back in.