KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: ALBYJAY on April 28, 2010, 10:47:00 AM
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Day 3
It is only day 3 on my quit. It feels like a year packed into 2 days. I haven't been dipping a long time like most. Less than a year I have been pulling from the can. I didn't want to celebrate a year anniversary with the Nic bitch. What take her out for dinner, buy her something nice to spit her in. A long stroll under the moonlight! Fuck That! FUCK HER!!!
So what got a 33yr old guy to start dipping so late in life. I guess I have always wanted to dip. I remember my first dip I was in 4th grade. I remember getting so sick. I tried it again in High school lucky I was so drunk when I did it. My body blamed the hangover on the dip so every time I did it after that I got sick. Well about a year ago a buddy gave me some Camel snuss. " I thought wow this is good man and
I even got a buzz".
The road that led me to a Can a day of Cope long cut straight, Is a sad and heartbroken story the kind you find in country songs. I will not tell that story now but I used Cope to help cope with my life over the last year. Well I am here to tell you I have killed my Can and it will not rise again!!!
But I sure hope Day 3 is better than Day two. I can't Hate everything and everyone for another day.
Screw everything,
James
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Day 3
It is only day 3 on my quit. It feels like a year packed into 2 days. I haven't been dipping a long time like most. Less than a year I have been pulling from the can. I didn't want to celebrate a year anniversary with the Nic bitch. What take her out for dinner, buy her something nice to spit her in. A long stroll under the moonlight! Fuck That! FUCK HER!!!
So what got a 33yr old guy to start dipping so late in life. I guess I have always wanted to dip. I remember my first dip I was in 4th grade. I remember getting so sick. I tried it again in High school lucky I was so drunk when I did it. My body blamed the hangover on the dip so every time I did it after that I got sick. Well about a year ago a buddy gave me some Camel snuss. " I thought wow this is good man and
I even got a buzz".
The road that led me to a Can a day of Cope long cut straight, Is a sad and heartbroken story the kind you find in country songs. I will not tell that story now but I used Cope to help cope with my life over the last year. Well I am here to tell you I have killed my Can and it will not rise again!!!
But I sure hope Day 3 is better than Day two. I can't Hate everything and everyone for another day.
Screw everything,
James
welcome to the suck
remember how bad this feels, embrace it cause it might just save your quit when you need it the most. you are almost through the hardest part physically, the withdraw
hang in there hate on us not the ones you love they didn't do this to you and they might not "get it" we do
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Day 3
It is only day 3 on my quit. It feels like a year packed into 2 days. I haven't been dipping a long time like most. Less than a year I have been pulling from the can. I didn't want to celebrate a year anniversary with the Nic bitch. What take her out for dinner, buy her something nice to spit her in. A long stroll under the moonlight! Fuck That! FUCK HER!!!
So what got a 33yr old guy to start dipping so late in life. I guess I have always wanted to dip. I remember my first dip I was in 4th grade. I remember getting so sick. I tried it again in High school lucky I was so drunk when I did it. My body blamed the hangover on the dip so every time I did it after that I got sick. Well about a year ago a buddy gave me some Camel snuss. " I thought wow this is good man and
I even got a buzz".
The road that led me to a Can a day of Cope long cut straight, Is a sad and heartbroken story the kind you find in country songs. I will not tell that story now but I used Cope to help cope with my life over the last year. Well I am here to tell you I have killed my Can and it will not rise again!!!
But I sure hope Day 3 is better than Day two. I can't Hate everything and everyone for another day.
Screw everything,
James
welcome to the suck
remember how bad this feels, embrace it cause it might just save your quit when you need it the most. you are almost through the hardest part physically, the withdraw
hang in there hate on us not the ones you love they didn't do this to you and they might not "get it" we do
Everything he said. And don't expect day three to be better yet. You're almost to where it will start improving, but not quite yet. You CAN take it though, so don't ever say you can't.
Kickass, quitter.
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Still on Day 3
Ok.. I am deep in the Suck now. I thought day one would be the hardest. I rolled into day two and wow it sucked worst. Now I am half way on day 3. I went to lunch down the road from my day job. I passed 6 gas stations. Can you guess what my mind did to me. All I could hear in my head, "$2.89 and you will feel better." I turned around and went back to work. Damn little evil Can! Damn me if I become week and cave. The only person to balm for that shame would be me. I will not piss the last couple of days away. I do not want to endure this again. I will NOT CAVE!!!
I will bring my lunch from now on. Damn Day 3 it is truly a world of Suck!
But I am committed to the Quit! That is what I am... Quit!!
James
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Still on Day 3
Ok.. I am deep in the Suck now. I thought day one would be the hardest. I rolled into day two and wow it sucked worst. Now I am half way on day 3. I went to lunch down the road from my day job. I passed 6 gas stations. Can you guess what my mind did to me. All I could hear in my head, "$2.89 and you will feel better." I turned around and went back to work. Damn little evil Can! Damn me if I become week and cave. The only person to balm for that shame would be me. I will not piss the last couple of days away. I do not want to endure this again. I will NOT CAVE!!!
I will bring my lunch from now on. Damn Day 3 it is truly a world of Suck!
But I am committed to the Quit! That is what I am... Quit!!
James
Good job man...stay quit! Day 3 sucks ass. I've had dozens of Day 3's. I had my last Day 3, 41 days ago. You can make it. Get a phone number if you need help.
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AHHHHHHH! I laugh at yesterday! How easy that was. Today is 5 times worst. I am sitting at work in a FOG, I am starting to sweat and I think I just broke a filling grinding my teeth. I cannot chew anymore gum! I cannot drink anymore dang water. I if ever see a Peanut plant again I will rip it out of the ground and Stop every last branch. 10 min left of my day job! Now I get to go to my night job and push latte's to DB's. I will see you at Roll call tomorrow.
I will not cave to the crave today! I made a commitment this morning by putting my name to roll!
'Finger'
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AHHHHHHH! I laugh at yesterday! How easy that was. Today is 5 times worst. I am sitting at work in a FOG, I am starting to sweat and I think I just broke a filling grinding my teeth. I cannot chew anymore gum! I cannot drink anymore dang water. I if ever see a Peanut plant again I will rip it out of the ground and Stop every last branch. 10 min left of my day job! Now I get to go to my night job and push latte's to DB's. I will see you at Roll call tomorrow.
I will not cave to the crave today! I made a commitment this morning by putting my name to roll!
'Finger'
Fuckin A!
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AHHHHHHH! I laugh at yesterday! How easy that was. Today is 5 times worst. I am sitting at work in a FOG, I am starting to sweat and I think I just broke a filling grinding my teeth. I cannot chew anymore gum! I cannot drink anymore dang water. I if ever see a Peanut plant again I will rip it out of the ground and Stop every last branch. 10 min left of my day job! Now I get to go to my night job and push latte's to DB's. I will see you at Roll call tomorrow.
I will not cave to the crave today! I made a commitment this morning by putting my name to roll!Â
'Finger'
Fuckin A!
Stay Determined. Its a bitch but you can do it.
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AHHHHHHH! I laugh at yesterday! How easy that was. Today is 5 times worst. I am sitting at work in a FOG, I am starting to sweat and I think I just broke a filling grinding my teeth. I cannot chew anymore gum! I cannot drink anymore dang water. I if ever see a Peanut plant again I will rip it out of the ground and Stop every last branch. 10 min left of my day job! Now I get to go to my night job and push latte's to DB's. I will see you at Roll call tomorrow.
I will not cave to the crave today! I made a commitment this morning by putting my name to roll!Â
'Finger'
Fuckin A!
Stay Determined. Its a bitch but you can do it.
day three does suck sweaty camel nuts. But it signifies the beginning of the end for nicotine having its claws in your back. Embrace the shittiness, it is your bodies reaction to the lack of that insecticide you've been shoving in your mouth. Can you imagine that these fuckers designed this stuff to purposely do that to you. ? The feeling you have of craving and cringing and anxiety and fucked up sleep and foggy ridiculousness? All chemically enginered by a collection of douchebag chemists to make you an addict then keep you an addict. This ought to piss you off enough to never give those cancer peddlers another red cent. Get pissed and stay that way. They are trying to kill you. Who's it gonna be? you or them?
Homework- see if by googling PH levels and Chew you can learn anything about one such douche type chemical engineering. Hint, PH is directly connected to amount and speed of nicotine absorbtion into the blood. Too much too fast you get a first time barfer. Just the right amount you get ......................addict.
Fuckers
sm'
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Day 4
Ok it is getting better. My Coffee tast's 4 times better today. The fog has lifted this morning.
James
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Day 4
Ok it is getting better. My Coffee tast's 4 times better today. The fog has lifted this morning.
James
Man I hate peanuts. But I guess this nasty crap is better to have in my moth then Fucking posion! 'bang head'
But It is still better then yesterday and worst then tomorrow!
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Embracing The SUCK!! - Day 4 in this journy. Just need to Stay on the Road!
What The Heck. I went to Walgreens to grab some Hard candy and Gum. (Fuck Peanuts, Really Fuck Them) Well I thought I was safe. The greens around here don't carry Dip I have tried before. And Now that I am Quit Right There behind the regs Cans of Grizzly. What the Shit! Tempting me But I just gave it a finger and ran out with my Hard candy and pride.
Why don't they make Cope flavor hard candy. One without the Nic bitch. I really liked the new Straight flavor.
Day 4 Still Sucks but Damn It is better than yesterday. I still have to get that filling fixed!
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Embracing The SUCK!! - Day 4 in this journy. Just need to Stay on the Road!
What The Heck. I went to Walgreens to grab some Hard candy and Gum. (Fuck Peanuts, Really Fuck Them) Well I thought I was safe. The greens around here don't carry Dip I have tried before. And Now that I am Quit Right There behind the regs Cans of Grizzly. What the Shit! Tempting me But I just gave it a finger and ran out with my Hard candy and pride.
Why don't they make Cope flavor hard candy. One without the Nic bitch. I really liked the new Straight flavor.
Day 4 Still Sucks but Damn It is better than yesterday. I still have to get that filling fixed!
Good job man! I'm totally with you on 'Hagen flavored...whatever! On that note, have you considered some of the dip alternatives? I've tried jerky chew, Oregon Mint, and now I've got Hooch. I highly recommend it. The Straight taste kinda like 'Hagen, and the Spitfire has a nice burn to it. I'm day 45 and it's been helping me a lot.
From Jersey originally. I know of what you speak about the fuckin' morons in the greater tri-state area.
We're here for ya' bro...
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Embracing The SUCK!! - Day 4 in this journy. Just need to Stay on the Road!
What The Heck. I went to Walgreens to grab some Hard candy and Gum. (Fuck Peanuts, Really Fuck Them) Well I thought I was safe. The greens around here don't carry Dip I have tried before. And Now that I am Quit Right There behind the regs Cans of Grizzly. What the Shit! Tempting me But I just gave it a finger and ran out with my Hard candy and pride.
Why don't they make Cope flavor hard candy. One without the Nic bitch. I really liked the new Straight flavor.
Day 4 Still Sucks but Damn It is better than yesterday. I still have to get that filling fixed!
Good job man! I'm totally with you on 'Hagen flavored...whatever! On that note, have you considered some of the dip alternatives? I've tried jerky chew, Oregon Mint, and now I've got Hooch. I highly recommend it. The Straight taste kinda like 'Hagen, and the Spitfire has a nice burn to it. I'm day 45 and it's been helping me a lot.
From Jersey originally. I know of what you speak about the fuckin' morons in the greater tri-state area.
We're here for ya' bro...
Ok I am all for trying the fake stuff! I just can't find anyware.
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Embracing The SUCK!! - Day 4 in this journy. Just need to Stay on the Road!
What The Heck. I went to Walgreens to grab some Hard candy and Gum. (Fuck Peanuts, Really Fuck Them) Well I thought I was safe. The greens around here don't carry Dip I have tried before. And Now that I am Quit Right There behind the regs Cans of Grizzly. What the Shit! Tempting me But I just gave it a finger and ran out with my Hard candy and pride.
Why don't they make Cope flavor hard candy. One without the Nic bitch. I really liked the new Straight flavor.
Day 4 Still Sucks but Damn It is better than yesterday. I still have to get that filling fixed!
Good job man! I'm totally with you on 'Hagen flavored...whatever! On that note, have you considered some of the dip alternatives? I've tried jerky chew, Oregon Mint, and now I've got Hooch. I highly recommend it. The Straight taste kinda like 'Hagen, and the Spitfire has a nice burn to it. I'm day 45 and it's been helping me a lot.
From Jersey originally. I know of what you speak about the fuckin' morons in the greater tri-state area.
We're here for ya' bro...
Ok I am all for trying the fake stuff! I just can't find anyware.
You can order it online.
Got Walmart? A lot of them carry Smokey Mountain. Call the ones in your area and see if they have it.
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Day 4
Ok it is getting better. My Coffee tast's 4 times better today. The fog has lifted this morning.
James
Man I hate peanuts. But I guess this nasty crap is better to have in my moth then Fucking posion! 'bang head'
But It is still better then yesterday and worst then tomorrow!
sorry dude, ya quoted yourself...your still foggin' :D
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Day 4
Ok it is getting better. My Coffee tast's 4 times better today. The fog has lifted this morning.
James
Man I hate peanuts. But I guess this nasty crap is better to have in my moth then Fucking posion! 'bang head'
But It is still better then yesterday and worst then tomorrow!
sorry dude, ya quoted yourself...your still foggin' :D
wait is that Bad to quote your self?
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Day 4
Ok it is getting better. My Coffee tast's 4 times better today. The fog has lifted this morning.
James
Man I hate peanuts. But I guess this nasty crap is better to have in my moth then Fucking posion! 'bang head'
But It is still better then yesterday and worst then tomorrow!
sorry dude, ya quoted yourself...your still foggin' :D
wait is that Bad to quote your self?
dude it's your page here. You do what ever the heck you want with it.
Quote yourself all you want, just stay quit.
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Day 4
Ok it is getting better. My Coffee tast's 4 times better today. The fog has lifted this morning.
James
Man I hate peanuts. But I guess this nasty crap is better to have in my moth then Fucking posion! 'bang head'
But It is still better then yesterday and worst then tomorrow!
sorry dude, ya quoted yourself...your still foggin' :D
wait is that Bad to quote your self?
dude it's your page here. You do what ever the heck you want with it.
Quote yourself all you want, just stay quit.
As long as you dont talk to yourself you are cool... 'Crazy'
It is your page tho... feel free to do whatever you need to do to stay quit.
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Day 5 - Leaving Suck Ville. To Hell Town!
Ok I went out and found some Smokey Mountain last night. WellÂ…. That stuff is nasty (I hate it almost as much as PEANUTS!!!)Â….. All it did was Swell up my toungh and make me want a real dip. The worst part, it cost more than a can of Cope! Screw that stuff!! I am still quit but feel that I took a step back. Had dip dreams all night!! got no sleep and I am just pissed off today! I am not looking forward to the weekend. I play Guts Frisbee on Saturdays and well everyone puts in an fatty! One of the rules is you have to have a beer. I will not drink even one. Can't let my guard down even a little. Or the nic bitch will get me! I will be strong and not cave.
Staying Quit is the only option here!
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Day 5 - Leaving Suck Ville. To Hell Town!
Ok I went out and found some Smokey Mountain last night. WellÂ…. That stuff is nasty (I hate it almost as much as PEANUTS!!!)Â….. All it did was Swell up my toungh and make me want a real dip. The worst part, it cost more than a can of Cope! Screw that stuff!! I am still quit but feel that I took a step back. Had dip dreams all night!! got no sleep and I am just pissed off today! I am not looking forward to the weekend. I play Guts Frisbee on Saturdays and well everyone puts in an fatty! One of the rules is you have to have a beer. I will not drink even one. Can't let my guard down even a little. Or the nic bitch will get me! I will be strong and not cave.
Staying Quit is the only option here!
Good job man! Staying quit is the ONLY way to stay quit, by the way. Step forward, backward, whatever...just don't give up on your quit. There was an old saying in the Marines..."It's ok to step on your crank...just don't mark time on it".
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Day 5 - Leaving Suck Ville. To Hell Town!
Ok I went out and found some Smokey Mountain last night. WellÂ…. That stuff is nasty (I hate it almost as much as PEANUTS!!!)Â….. All it did was Swell up my toungh and make me want a real dip. The worst part, it cost more than a can of Cope! Screw that stuff!! I am still quit but feel that I took a step back. Had dip dreams all night!! got no sleep and I am just pissed off today! I am not looking forward to the weekend. I play Guts Frisbee on Saturdays and well everyone puts in an fatty! One of the rules is you have to have a beer. I will not drink even one. Can't let my guard down even a little. Or the nic bitch will get me! I will be strong and not cave.Â
Staying Quit is the only option here!
Good job man! Staying quit is the ONLY way to stay quit, by the way. Step forward, backward, whatever...just don't give up on your quit. There was an old saying in the Marines..."It's ok to step on your crank...just don't mark time on it".
Sounds like you are doing great. Keep up the good work. Be damn careful going around a bunch of dippers this early in...especially if beer is in the equation. I would suggest skipping this for the first week. You have to protect your quit at all cost.
If you do choose to go Saturday just remeber He's Watching You. (http://blog.lib.umn.edu/hans1995/pants/mrpeanut.jpg) This guy has no tolerance for cavers.
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Day 5 - Leaving Suck Ville. To Hell Town!
Ok I went out and found some Smokey Mountain last night. WellÂ…. That stuff is nasty (I hate it almost as much as PEANUTS!!!)Â….. All it did was Swell up my toungh and make me want a real dip. The worst part, it cost more than a can of Cope! Screw that stuff!! I am still quit but feel that I took a step back. Had dip dreams all night!! got no sleep and I am just pissed off today! I am not looking forward to the weekend. I play Guts Frisbee on Saturdays and well everyone puts in an fatty! One of the rules is you have to have a beer. I will not drink even one. Can't let my guard down even a little. Or the nic bitch will get me! I will be strong and not cave. Â
Staying Quit is the only option here!
Good job man! Staying quit is the ONLY way to stay quit, by the way. Step forward, backward, whatever...just don't give up on your quit. There was an old saying in the Marines..."It's ok to step on your crank...just don't mark time on it".
Sounds like you are doing great. Keep up the good work. Be damn careful going around a bunch of dippers this early in...especially if beer is in the equation. I would suggest skipping this for the first week. You have to protect your quit at all cost.
If you do choose to go Saturday just remeber He's Watching You. (http://blog.lib.umn.edu/hans1995/pants/mrpeanut.jpg) This guy has no tolerance for cavers.
LOL!! Damn Peanut man!
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K here is my Friday rage!
I work part time at SBucksÂ… I have worked every night this week. (Better than sitting at my pad hanging with My brother and is Fat lip). IF you are going to order a Latte or a FAT-Chino! Maybe You should pull your head out your ASS first. If I have too decipher some douchtards drink one more f'n time I going to lose it. If you come to my bucks and order a F'n GETTO LATTE I hope you like DECAFE!
Here is a drink that makes no F'n Since to me and just gets my blood boiling when I hear it. "Triple Venti Extra Whip, Breve White Mocha" doesn't sound so bad right? But then the douchtards ask for 3 Equals or splenda in it. Really WTF!! do you know who much surger is in this 20oz cup of crap and they ask for sweetener!!! Come on seoursly what the hell has this world come too? (NOW SB is coming out with a 30oz) Yep 2oz less then a Big Gulp!
But then again I liked putting poison in my mouth 7-10 times a day! Now who is the baggiest Douchtard!!
Stay Strong! Stay Quit!
Keep all Crap out your PIE HOLE!
Only Drink water or black Coffee! No Sissy shit!
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K here is my Friday rage!
I work part time at SBucks… I have worked every night this week. (Better than sitting at my pad hanging with My brother and is Fat lip). IF you are going to order a Latte or a FAT-Chino! Maybe You should pull your head out your ASS first. If I have too decipher some douchtards drink one more f'n time I going to lose it. If you come to my bucks and order a F'n GETTO LATTE I hope you like DECAFE!
Here is a drink that makes no F'n Since to me and just gets my blood boiling when I hear it. "Triple Venti Extra Whip, Breve White Mocha" doesn't sound so bad right? But then the douchtards ask for 3 Equals or splenda in it. Really WTF!! do you know who much surger is in this 20oz cup of crap and they ask for sweetener!!! Come on seoursly what the hell has this world come too? (NOW SB is coming out with a 30oz) Yep 2oz less then a Big Gulp!
But then again I liked putting poison in my mouth 7-10 times a day! Now who is the baggiest Douchtard!!
Stay Strong! Stay Quit!
Keep all Crap out your PIE HOLE!
Only Drink water or black Coffee! No Sissy shit!
starbucks drives me nuts, i want my coffee with cream that's it not roasted beyond coffee flavor in to something that tastes half burnt (ok so it's supposed to be a bold roast) but ordering coffee should require no more than five words
1. size
2. black or with cream
3. sugar/sweat low/equal
4. a sleeve or not
5. thank you
me at tim horton: large coffee with cream, thanks
LOVE THE RAGE good quitting here
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K here is my Friday rage!
I work part time at SBucks… I have worked every night this week. (Better than sitting at my pad hanging with My brother and is Fat lip). IF you are going to order a Latte or a FAT-Chino! Maybe You should pull your head out your ASS first. If I have too decipher some douchtards drink one more f'n time I going to lose it. If you come to my bucks and order a F'n GETTO LATTE I hope you like DECAFE!
Here is a drink that makes no F'n Since to me and just gets my blood boiling when I hear it. "Triple Venti Extra Whip, Breve White Mocha" doesn't sound so bad right? But then the douchtards ask for 3 Equals or splenda in it. Really WTF!! do you know who much surger is in this 20oz cup of crap and they ask for sweetener!!! Come on seoursly what the hell has this world come too? (NOW SB is coming out with a 30oz) Yep 2oz less then a Big Gulp!
But then again I liked putting poison in my mouth 7-10 times a day! Now who is the baggiest Douchtard!!
Stay Strong! Stay Quit!
Keep all Crap out your PIE HOLE!
Only Drink water or black Coffee! No Sissy shit!
starbucks drives me nuts, i want my coffee with cream that's it not roasted beyond coffee flavor in to something that tastes half burnt (ok so it's supposed to be a bold roast) but ordering coffee should require no more than five words
1. size
2. black or with cream
3. sugar/sweat low/equal
4. a sleeve or not
5. thank you
me at tim horton: large coffee with cream, thanks
LOVE THE RAGE good quitting here
Im not a big fan of coffee anyway but it sounds like you have on hell of a day. I wouldnt be able to put up with people for that long. Just stay quit and all will be just fine and dandy
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Day 8- Weekend update.
Ok.. Ok.. No drinking for 20-30 days. I get it now. I didn't listen and Friday night sucked big time. I have a good buddy deploying to Iraq. I went to his going away party. I decided what can one beer hurtÂ… I kept too one beer but it was like day one all over again. I drank the beer and next thing I know I was in a fog. I started to sweat, couldn't understand what people were saying to me. I did not cave! I am not drinking for a long time!!
I decided to buy another can of Smokey Mountain. I got the Peach this time. I liked the taste allot better. Still pissed about the price. I did the whole can in one day. My teeth and jaw hurt as if I was still hitting the Cope. Now I am craving SM!! I am day 1 without SM.
I decided not to go to the Park on Saturday and play Guts Frisbee. Couldn't be around the Beer and all the guys dipping. Just not ready for that yet!
Went to a movie instead.
Still Hate Peanuts!! Someone tried to offer me some this weekend and I flipped out. I think I associate them with Day 2 and 3 of the quit. The two worst days yet.
Still keeping the Crap out my Mouth! (including F'n Peanuts)
Still hating the world! 'Finger'
Day 3 with no beer! :wacko:
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Day 9 - WTF day
So I almost caved this morning. Almost brought my quit to a end. Fucking nic bitch was whispering sweet nothings in my ear!
I started craving so hard around 3pm yesterday. My whole night was hell. No amount of gum could hold the bitch at bay. I went to sleep saying Fuck her I can do this. I woke up this morning and grabbed my coffee. Flopped myself on the couch. I Need the black brew to open my eyes. When I was able to fully open them I saw it. Right there on my coffee table!! Right fucking there!! Two cans of Cope LCS. One open the other brand new.
My brother left his cans out! In Stead of running I found myself staring at them. Before I knew it my mind was full of lies! " Go ahead one pinch can't hurt." " Don't you want the fog to left." "You will feel 3 times better." DIP..DIP.. DIP. My heart started pumping so fast! I knew I should have run. I see a hand reaching for it. what nooo! The hard work, the pain. I can't do this again. "Wait a minute thatÂ’s not my hand?" My brother grabbed his cans. " Sorry man" he says I think. All I can hear is my heart beating in my head! I immediately got up and went to my computer and posted roll! I will do that from now before my F'n coffee.
I was mere seconds away from caving. Back to the daily routine of hell. I saw his cans on the table the night before but I was stronger then. First thing in the morning is another story. The daily habit of waking up and throwing a dip in is still so strong. I do feel better in the morning without it. Funny how I use to think I couldn't get going without a morning pull or two. I do not know if I would have grabbed the can. I do know it would have sucked if I did.
I will not use today!
I will keep that Crap out of my mouth!
I will Keep living by quitting!
I will POST ROLL no matter What! (If you don't see my Name I am dead on a mountain! I was probably crying why do I have to post roll when I am off the grid!)
I Will hate everything and Everyone! (So Fuck You!!!)(Well until day 100, Then I love Man!)
Fucking Cheers!
James
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Day 9 - WTF day
So I almost caved this morning. Almost brought my quit to a end. Fucking nic bitch was whispering sweet nothings in my ear!
I started craving so hard around 3pm yesterday. My whole night was hell. No amount of gum could hold the bitch at bay. I went to sleep saying Fuck her I can do this. I woke up this morning and grabbed my coffee. Flopped myself on the couch. I Need the black brew to open my eyes. When I was able to fully open them I saw it. Right there on my coffee table!! Right fucking there!! Two cans of Cope LCS. One open the other brand new.
My brother left his cans out! In Stead of running I found myself staring at them. Before I knew it my mind was full of lies! " Go ahead one pinch can't hurt." " Don't you want the fog to left." "You will feel 3 times better." DIP..DIP.. DIP. My heart started pumping so fast! I knew I should have run. I see a hand reaching for it. what nooo! The hard work, the pain. I can't do this again. "Wait a minute thatÂ’s not my hand?" My brother grabbed his cans. " Sorry man" he says I think. All I can hear is my heart beating in my head! I immediately got up and went to my computer and posted roll! I will do that from now before my F'n coffee.
I was mere seconds away from caving. Back to the daily routine of hell. I saw his cans on the table the night before but I was stronger then. First thing in the morning is another story. The daily habit of waking up and throwing a dip in is still so strong. I do feel better in the morning without it. Funny how I use to think I couldn't get going without a morning pull or two. I do not know if I would have grabbed the can. I do know it would have sucked if I did.
I will not use today!
I will keep that Crap out of my mouth!
I will Keep living by quitting!
I will POST ROLL no matter What! (If you don't see my Name I am dead on a mountain! I was probably crying why do I have to post roll when I am off the grid!)
I Will hate everything and Everyone! (So Fuck You!!!)(Well until day 100, Then I love Man!)
Fucking Cheers!
James
MOTHERFUCKER!!! you got me worked up now, man. SON OF A BITCH! Can't believe you're brother left you in the lurch like that. Un-fucking-acceptable. But I can also say that you are my fuckin hero, man. That is some serious badass quittin. I'm even teared up a little when you said you ran upstairs and posted roll. Hot damn - you got what it takes man. I can feel it. Keep on keepin' on - and check your PM brother. I'm there if you need me.
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Day 9 - WTF day
So I almost caved this morning. Almost brought my quit to a end. Fucking nic bitch was whispering sweet nothings in my ear!
I started craving so hard around 3pm yesterday. My whole night was hell. No amount of gum could hold the bitch at bay. I went to sleep saying Fuck her I can do this. I woke up this morning and grabbed my coffee. Flopped myself on the couch. I Need the black brew to open my eyes. When I was able to fully open them I saw it. Right there on my coffee table!! Right fucking there!! Two cans of Cope LCS. One open the other brand new.
My brother left his cans out! In Stead of running I found myself staring at them. Before I knew it my mind was full of lies! " Go ahead one pinch can't hurt." " Don't you want the fog to left." "You will feel 3 times better." DIP..DIP.. DIP. My heart started pumping so fast! I knew I should have run. I see a hand reaching for it. what nooo! The hard work, the pain. I can't do this again. "Wait a minute that’s not my hand?" My brother grabbed his cans. " Sorry man" he says I think. All I can hear is my heart beating in my head! I immediately got up and went to my computer and posted roll! I will do that from now before my F'n coffee.
I was mere seconds away from caving. Back to the daily routine of hell. I saw his cans on the table the night before but I was stronger then. First thing in the morning is another story. The daily habit of waking up and throwing a dip in is still so strong. I do feel better in the morning without it. Funny how I use to think I couldn't get going without a morning pull or two. I do not know if I would have grabbed the can. I do know it would have sucked if I did.
I will not use today!
I will keep that Crap out of my mouth!
I will Keep living by quitting!
I will POST ROLL no matter What! (If you don't see my Name I am dead on a mountain! I was probably crying why do I have to post roll when I am off the grid!)
I Will hate everything and Everyone! (So Fuck You!!!)(Well until day 100, Then I love Man!)
Fucking Cheers!
James
MOTHERFUCKER!!! you got me worked up now, man. SON OF A BITCH! Can't believe you're brother left you in the lurch like that. Un-fucking-acceptable. But I can also say that you are my fuckin hero, man. That is some serious badass quittin. I'm even teared up a little when you said you ran upstairs and posted roll. Hot damn - you got what it takes man. I can feel it. Keep on keepin' on - and check your PM brother. I'm there if you need me.
You have recognized a weakness in your shield. Take the necessary steps to make sure it never happens again. It will get better and it will get easier. Will it ever completely go away? Your an addict -What do you think? Will you be better able and more equipped to handle situations like this when they arise. You Bet!
Carry on and Stay Quit and keep your fucking hand out of the cookie jar your conscious is watching!
-
Day 9 - WTF day
So I almost caved this morning. Almost brought my quit to a end. Fucking nic bitch was whispering sweet nothings in my ear!
I started craving so hard around 3pm yesterday. My whole night was hell. No amount of gum could hold the bitch at bay. I went to sleep saying Fuck her I can do this. I woke up this morning and grabbed my coffee. Flopped myself on the couch. I Need the black brew to open my eyes. When I was able to fully open them I saw it. Right there on my coffee table!! Right fucking there!! Two cans of Cope LCS. One open the other brand new.
My brother left his cans out! In Stead of running I found myself staring at them. Before I knew it my mind was full of lies! " Go ahead one pinch can't hurt." " Don't you want the fog to left." "You will feel 3 times better." DIP..DIP.. DIP. My heart started pumping so fast! I knew I should have run. I see a hand reaching for it. what nooo! The hard work, the pain. I can't do this again. "Wait a minute that’s not my hand?" My brother grabbed his cans. " Sorry man" he says I think. All I can hear is my heart beating in my head! I immediately got up and went to my computer and posted roll! I will do that from now before my F'n coffee.
I was mere seconds away from caving. Back to the daily routine of hell. I saw his cans on the table the night before but I was stronger then. First thing in the morning is another story. The daily habit of waking up and throwing a dip in is still so strong. I do feel better in the morning without it. Funny how I use to think I couldn't get going without a morning pull or two. I do not know if I would have grabbed the can. I do know it would have sucked if I did.
I will not use today!
I will keep that Crap out of my mouth!
I will Keep living by quitting!
I will POST ROLL no matter What! (If you don't see my Name I am dead on a mountain! I was probably crying why do I have to post roll when I am off the grid!)
I Will hate everything and Everyone! (So Fuck You!!!)(Well until day 100, Then I love Man!)
Fucking Cheers!
James
MOTHERFUCKER!!! you got me worked up now, man. SON OF A BITCH! Can't believe you're brother left you in the lurch like that. Un-fucking-acceptable. But I can also say that you are my fuckin hero, man. That is some serious badass quittin. I'm even teared up a little when you said you ran upstairs and posted roll. Hot damn - you got what it takes man. I can feel it. Keep on keepin' on - and check your PM brother. I'm there if you need me.
You have recognized a weakness in your shield. Take the necessary steps to make sure it never happens again. It will get better and it will get easier. Will it ever completely go away? Your an addict -What do you think? Will you be better able and more equipped to handle situations like this when they arise. You Bet!
Carry on and Stay Quit and keep your fucking hand out of the cookie jar your conscious is watching!
living with your brother that dips sounds like it could be problematic, but it does sound like you have a very supportive bro by him grabbing them away as opposed to telling you "one won't hurt." However, I would recommend the next time you see one of his cans somewhere...you dump that shit in the toilet and flush....when he asks tell him what you did. I suspect he won't leave many more cans laying around.
-
Day 9 - WTF day
So I almost caved this morning. Almost brought my quit to a end. Fucking nic bitch was whispering sweet nothings in my ear!
I started craving so hard around 3pm yesterday. My whole night was hell. No amount of gum could hold the bitch at bay. I went to sleep saying Fuck her I can do this. I woke up this morning and grabbed my coffee. Flopped myself on the couch. I Need the black brew to open my eyes. When I was able to fully open them I saw it. Right there on my coffee table!! Right fucking there!! Two cans of Cope LCS. One open the other brand new.
My brother left his cans out! In Stead of running I found myself staring at them. Before I knew it my mind was full of lies! " Go ahead one pinch can't hurt." " Don't you want the fog to left." "You will feel 3 times better." DIP..DIP.. DIP. My heart started pumping so fast! I knew I should have run. I see a hand reaching for it. what nooo! The hard work, the pain. I can't do this again. "Wait a minute that’s not my hand?" My brother grabbed his cans. " Sorry man" he says I think. All I can hear is my heart beating in my head! I immediately got up and went to my computer and posted roll! I will do that from now before my F'n coffee.
I was mere seconds away from caving. Back to the daily routine of hell. I saw his cans on the table the night before but I was stronger then. First thing in the morning is another story. The daily habit of waking up and throwing a dip in is still so strong. I do feel better in the morning without it. Funny how I use to think I couldn't get going without a morning pull or two. I do not know if I would have grabbed the can. I do know it would have sucked if I did.
I will not use today!
I will keep that Crap out of my mouth!
I will Keep living by quitting!
I will POST ROLL no matter What! (If you don't see my Name I am dead on a mountain! I was probably crying why do I have to post roll when I am off the grid!)
I Will hate everything and Everyone! (So Fuck You!!!)(Well until day 100, Then I love Man!)
Fucking Cheers!
James
MOTHERFUCKER!!! you got me worked up now, man. SON OF A BITCH! Can't believe you're brother left you in the lurch like that. Un-fucking-acceptable. But I can also say that you are my fuckin hero, man. That is some serious badass quittin. I'm even teared up a little when you said you ran upstairs and posted roll. Hot damn - you got what it takes man. I can feel it. Keep on keepin' on - and check your PM brother. I'm there if you need me.
You have recognized a weakness in your shield. Take the necessary steps to make sure it never happens again. It will get better and it will get easier. Will it ever completely go away? Your an addict -What do you think? Will you be better able and more equipped to handle situations like this when they arise. You Bet!
Carry on and Stay Quit and keep your fucking hand out of the cookie jar your conscious is watching!
living with your brother that dips sounds like it could be problematic, but it does sound like you have a very supportive bro by him grabbing them away as opposed to telling you "one won't hurt." However, I would recommend the next time you see one of his cans somewhere...you dump that shit in the toilet and flush....when he asks tell him what you did. I suspect he won't leave many more cans laying around.
That, and just remember, nothing outside of you can make you dip. It's the addiction and your choices. It's easier to talk about ignoring outside forces than actually doing it, but you can learn to. I tried to start training myself pretty early that nothing outside of myself will affect me. I know too many people who dip and smoke to let that affect me. If I freak out every time I see a dip, I'm in for a long life.
Dipping is now something other people do. It's not part of your life anymore. What your brother or anyone else does is their deal, not yours.
Way to kick this trigger to curb. It'll become easier each time you do it.
-
Day 9 - WTF day
So I almost caved this morning. Almost brought my quit to a end. Fucking nic bitch was whispering sweet nothings in my ear!
I started craving so hard around 3pm yesterday. My whole night was hell. No amount of gum could hold the bitch at bay. I went to sleep saying Fuck her I can do this. I woke up this morning and grabbed my coffee. Flopped myself on the couch. I Need the black brew to open my eyes. When I was able to fully open them I saw it. Right there on my coffee table!! Right fucking there!! Two cans of Cope LCS. One open the other brand new.
My brother left his cans out! In Stead of running I found myself staring at them. Before I knew it my mind was full of lies! " Go ahead one pinch can't hurt." " Don't you want the fog to left." "You will feel 3 times better." DIP..DIP.. DIP. My heart started pumping so fast! I knew I should have run. I see a hand reaching for it. what nooo! The hard work, the pain. I can't do this again. "Wait a minute that’s not my hand?" My brother grabbed his cans. " Sorry man" he says I think. All I can hear is my heart beating in my head! I immediately got up and went to my computer and posted roll! I will do that from now before my F'n coffee.
I was mere seconds away from caving. Back to the daily routine of hell. I saw his cans on the table the night before but I was stronger then. First thing in the morning is another story. The daily habit of waking up and throwing a dip in is still so strong. I do feel better in the morning without it. Funny how I use to think I couldn't get going without a morning pull or two. I do not know if I would have grabbed the can. I do know it would have sucked if I did.
I will not use today!
I will keep that Crap out of my mouth!
I will Keep living by quitting!
I will POST ROLL no matter What! (If you don't see my Name I am dead on a mountain! I was probably crying why do I have to post roll when I am off the grid!)
I Will hate everything and Everyone! (So Fuck You!!!)(Well until day 100, Then I love Man!)
Fucking Cheers!
James
MOTHERFUCKER!!! you got me worked up now, man. SON OF A BITCH! Can't believe you're brother left you in the lurch like that. Un-fucking-acceptable. But I can also say that you are my fuckin hero, man. That is some serious badass quittin. I'm even teared up a little when you said you ran upstairs and posted roll. Hot damn - you got what it takes man. I can feel it. Keep on keepin' on - and check your PM brother. I'm there if you need me.
You have recognized a weakness in your shield. Take the necessary steps to make sure it never happens again. It will get better and it will get easier. Will it ever completely go away? Your an addict -What do you think? Will you be better able and more equipped to handle situations like this when they arise. You Bet!
Carry on and Stay Quit and keep your fucking hand out of the cookie jar your conscious is watching!
living with your brother that dips sounds like it could be problematic, but it does sound like you have a very supportive bro by him grabbing them away as opposed to telling you "one won't hurt." However, I would recommend the next time you see one of his cans somewhere...you dump that shit in the toilet and flush....when he asks tell him what you did. I suspect he won't leave many more cans laying around.
That, and just remember, nothing outside of you can make you dip. It's the addiction and your choices. It's easier to talk about ignoring outside forces than actually doing it, but you can learn to. I tried to start training myself pretty early that nothing outside of myself will affect me. I know too many people who dip and smoke to let that affect me. If I freak out every time I see a dip, I'm in for a long life.
Dipping is now something other people do. It's not part of your life anymore. What your brother or anyone else does is their deal, not yours.
Way to kick this trigger to curb. It'll become easier each time you do it.
you are at a vulnerable time right now. you're probably feeling better as the nic leaves your system and now the mind games start (that's the whispering) be on guard for it and have a plan you can do this and tell your brother to keep his cans out of your face because this is important to you
-
I planned to only post rants on Friday. But I am just pissed off tonight. First I like to say FUCK HAWKQUIT! I remember day two like a bad Fucking dream. I was in no shape to go anywhere especially a fucking BAR!!! I am sure that fucking douche bag bought a can on the way. Why the Fuck ask for help when you know for sure you are going to cave and put a Fatty in your mouth like a fucking two dollar whore! It is one thing to cave most of us are fucking pussyÂ’s. But to blame that shit on someone one else is fucking despicable. This douche bags poor wife has to put up with his sorry ass and now he blames his fucking weakness on her. What a fucking looser.
Today I am quit. I take it one day at a time. Yesterday sucked, today is worst then tomorrow. These are truths I live by. If I was to cave tomorrow I caved and no one else. ItÂ’s me that would have to look at my sorry ass in the mirror. The Nic bitch didnÂ’t make me. The Cope can didnÂ’t make me. My brother with his fat lip didnÂ’t make me. Being afraid to piss off my soon to be ex wife wont. I would! Only I would make me cave. Only I can stay quit. So today I am a quitter and fucking proud of it.
If you don’t feel you should have to post roll then Fucking don’t! But if I have to hear you bitch about getting shit for it. Look if you are not committed to the quit then like what SM said you “FAIL”. You failed and no one else is to blame but you’re sorry ass. If you are a new quitter like me and reading this crap that I am ranting on about then remember this Stay the Fuck out of BARS! And above all Don’t eat Fucking PEANUTS!
I have to say not drinking is almost as hard as not dipping. I think I need to go to AA! Na Fuck that I will just post on here and cry every fÂ’n day until I can have a beer again.
Look at the time. I am on day 10 now. The quit still sucks but tomorrow will be better.
Daily Pledge:
I will not Cave today!
I will not eat Peanuts today!
I will Keep the Shit out my mouth!
I will hate everything and everyone!
I will keep my sorry ass out of the Bar!
I will get some damn sleep!
Cheers
James
-
You are getting it! You are in a tough stage, but you have to trust us when we say it will Get Better!
P.S. Sleep is highly overated.
-
Day 16 - Ok I can do this!
Every day is getting better in the morning. I wake up and think dang I feel good.(NO FOG) Around 3pm I feel like shit. (Total Fog) I can't concentrate can't get anything done. I am not sure why this is. I would think that If I don't crave in the morning why are my afternoons so shitty! My other issue is my pants are starting to get tight. I haven't had the energy to get myself back into the gym. When I start craving I eat anything in sight. I woke up around 3am last night and felt like I needed a dip. I went to the fridge and ate pepperonis. Fucking nick bitch! I don't even think it is Nicotine I am after. It is the feeling that everything will be ok when I put a fatty in my lip. All F'n mental. My life is becoming mental!
I have also decided giving up beer is a good thing. It is hard, I drank some on Friday. Didn't cause me to Dip. I just was hung over like hell on Saturday. I am trying to make my life better by giving up the can. Well it's not a bad thing to give up the other can! Every morning I say to myself "I will not chew today" "I will not drink today". Both go hand in hand.
I am not pissed all the time like in the first 5 days. I just have a short fuse now. I get pissed off at little shit. It use to take allot for me to even get mad at something big. Now I am like a powder keg. Something like a customer asking for Whip on a drink that already comes with it makes me want to take the drink a shove it up their fucking ass.
Ok it is now 3pm! I can feel it coming on. I have been writing this all day. I can't get my thoughts straight. The fog is coming on. My head feels like it is about to explode. Where the hell did I put the aspirin? Maybe this is caused by all the damn candy I have been eating for the last hour. Who knows! But I feel like shit! Fuck the Can! I am quit today that is all that matters. I feel better and it will not take putting that shit into my mouth!
I am Quit!
I am Â…Â…Â… I am done! see you at Roll tomorrow.
Cheers,
James
-
Day 16 - Ok I can do this!
Every day is getting better in the morning. I wake up and think dang I feel good.(NO FOG) Around 3pm I feel like shit. (Total Fog) I can't concentrate can't get anything done. I am not sure why this is. I would think that If I don't crave in the morning why are my afternoons so shitty! My other issue is my pants are starting to get tight. I haven't had the energy to get myself back into the gym. When I start craving I eat anything in sight. I woke up around 3am last night and felt like I needed a dip. I went to the fridge and ate pepperonis. Fucking nick bitch! I don't even think it is Nicotine I am after. It is the feeling that everything will be ok when I put a fatty in my lip. All F'n mental. My life is becoming mental!
I have also decided giving up beer is a good thing. It is hard, I drank some on Friday. Didn't cause me to Dip. I just was hung over like hell on Saturday. I am trying to make my life better by giving up the can. Well it's not a bad thing to give up the other can! Every morning I say to myself "I will not chew today" "I will not drink today". Both go hand in hand.
I am not pissed all the time like in the first 5 days. I just have a short fuse now. I get pissed off at little shit. It use to take allot for me to even get mad at something big. Now I am like a powder keg. Something like a customer asking for Whip on a drink that already comes with it makes me want to take the drink a shove it up their fucking ass.
Ok it is now 3pm! I can feel it coming on. I have been writing this all day. I can't get my thoughts straight. The fog is coming on. My head feels like it is about to explode. Where the hell did I put the aspirin? Maybe this is caused by all the damn candy I have been eating for the last hour. Who knows! But I feel like shit! Fuck the Can! I am quit today that is all that matters. I feel better and it will not take putting that shit into my mouth!
I am Quit!
I am Â…Â…Â… I am done! see you at Roll tomorrow.
Cheers,
James
Awesome Job James! You've pretty much summed up early quitting and the fog that comes with it. You've heard it before and I'll tell you again...it's get WAY better. You check any previous quit group out here and look at the post around two weeks in. You'll find what you're going through is right on track. I just want commend you for posting up about it. Not only for your own good (it's fucking cool to go back read this shit in a month or two) but for others who are going through or WILL be going through this stage soon. Soon you'll find the times you think about it are getting farther and farther apart. Then, you'll start to live the life you were supposed to have been living all along.
Stay strong my man and keep posting up your shit.