KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: BAMF on December 29, 2014, 12:10:00 PM
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My name is Matthew, I am 37 years old and I have been addicted to Copenhagen since I was roughly 15 years old. I have had momentary lapses in my addiction but have never been able to put it to bed. I have 3 beautiful kids, 2 boys and 1 girl and just found out another boy on the way. Anyhow, I have plenty of reasons to want to live a long life. I guess I just never really wanted to quit for myself, when I came to that realization I guess it hit me how selfish I was being and how selfish I am with regards to keeping this habit. Then I got mad, really mad, that I (felt) like was being held hostage by this drug / chemical that I cannot get the courage/strength to stop - for good.
So, I was leaving work on Christmas eve, was a little pissed that I had to rummage through my desk and find a can so Id have some for the ride home - anyhow something clicked and I tossed the can into the garbage. So I put this as my 5th or 6th day without dip. Anyhow, was having some seriously gnarly cravings as I sat down at my desk this morning (I work in Law Enforcement so its everywhere and all the garbage cans have spit in em). Anyhow, was looking (googling) stories and really just trying to get my mind off of the cravings, found this site, wasn't going to join, but figured everything I have done in the past has failed so here goes... Thanks for stopping by and reading, and giving me a place to vent, I feel better already.
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My name is Matthew, I am 37 years old and I have been addicted to Copenhagen since I was roughly 15 years old. I have had momentary lapses in my addiction but have never been able to put it to bed. I have 3 beautiful kids, 2 boys and 1 girl and just found out another boy on the way. Anyhow, I have plenty of reasons to want to live a long life. I guess I just never really wanted to quit for myself, when I came to that realization I guess it hit me how selfish I was being and how selfish I am with regards to keeping this habit. Then I got mad, really mad, that I (felt) like was being held hostage by this drug / chemical that I cannot get the courage/strength to stop - for good.
So, I was leaving work on Christmas eve, was a little pissed that I had to rummage through my desk and find a can so Id have some for the ride home - anyhow something clicked and I tossed the can into the garbage. So I put this as my 5th or 6th day without dip. Anyhow, was having some seriously gnarly cravings as I sat down at my desk this morning (I work in Law Enforcement so its everywhere and all the garbage cans have spit in em). Anyhow, was looking (googling) stories and really just trying to get my mind off of the cravings, found this site, wasn't going to join, but figured everything I have done in the past has failed so here goes... Thanks for stopping by and reading, and giving me a place to vent, I feel better already.
Matthew, Congratulations on the new addition to your family! And congratulations on your decision to quit and give your family the best Christmas present
We are all addicts here and the can has been controlling our lives and stealing it away from loved ones.
Your story is like a lot of folks on here (and we have a good number of law enforcement quitters).
Read up on the site, posting roll is the key to success and the back bone of the site.
This is your first and last quit, but you have to invest in it!
Message me for my cell number and we can text when you get tough cravings,
Idaho Spuds
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You might not be here by accident. Get yourself on roll! 28 year user here and 925 days of unbroken promises. Posting up's been the ONLY thing that's ever stuck. Posting our promise prevents us from being another statistic, taking it off the table every day. Welcome and thanks for your service, tough time to be a cop.
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Come quit with us. After 5-6 days quit, you will be needing support because it's all mental now. Your brain needs to learn how to function without nicotine in the drivers seat. Once you are part of something larger than you and your quit, you will feel a sense of accountability. Trust me, it works. I'm 119 days quit and I was the guy that would never quit. My family loves my quit, but I love it more than they possibly could. God bless all the cops. soxffn
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You might not be here by accident. Get yourself on roll! 28 year user here and 925 days of unbroken promises. Posting up's been the ONLY thing that's ever stuck. Posting our promise prevents us from being another statistic, taking it off the table every day. Welcome and thanks for your service, tough time to be a cop.
Thanks! I am navigating this site in between catching up on work/emails and the information here is tremendous, seems like a lot of good dudes. I plan on posting in the April section after I familiarize myself with the workings of this site a little bit more.
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Come quit with us. After 5-6 days quit, you will be needing support because it's all mental now. Your brain needs to learn how to function without nicotine in the drivers seat. Once you are part of something larger than you and your quit, you will feel a sense of accountability. Trust me, it works. I'm 119 days quit and I was the guy that would never quit. My family loves my quit, but I love it more than they possibly could. God bless all the cops. soxffn
Yes I was reading in the April section and plan on posting there, my ass better be ready - there is no quarter given in there. It's pretty brutal I have to take a stand though and I believe this will work. Thanks for your response.
Matt
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Come quit with us. After 5-6 days quit, you will be needing support because it's all mental now. Your brain needs to learn how to function without nicotine in the drivers seat. Once you are part of something larger than you and your quit, you will feel a sense of accountability. Trust me, it works. I'm 119 days quit and I was the guy that would never quit. My family loves my quit, but I love it more than they possibly could. God bless all the cops. soxffn
Yes I was reading in the April section and plan on posting there, my ass better be ready - there is no quarter given in there. It's pretty brutal I have to take a stand though and I believe this will work. Thanks for your response.
Matt
Post that roll, brother. The brutality is generally reserved for liars and cavers, you have a clean slate. Jump in and post roll and brutally say FUCK YOU to all forms of nicotine delivery and that motherfucker Marty Barrington.
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Come quit with us. After 5-6 days quit, you will be needing support because it's all mental now. Your brain needs to learn how to function without nicotine in the drivers seat. Once you are part of something larger than you and your quit, you will feel a sense of accountability. Trust me, it works. I'm 119 days quit and I was the guy that would never quit. My family loves my quit, but I love it more than they possibly could. God bless all the cops. soxffn
Yes I was reading in the April section and plan on posting there, my ass better be ready - there is no quarter given in there. It's pretty brutal I have to take a stand though and I believe this will work. Thanks for your response.
Matt
Post that roll, brother. The brutality is generally reserved for liars and cavers, you have a clean slate. Jump in and post roll and brutally say FUCK YOU to all forms of nicotine delivery and that motherfucker Marty Barrington.
Posted - I think I did it correctly. Thanks. One question though; I am to log in every day until my 100 days and post just as I did? with an updated day count and reaffirmation of my commitment to quitting?
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Come quit with us. After 5-6 days quit, you will be needing support because it's all mental now. Your brain needs to learn how to function without nicotine in the drivers seat. Once you are part of something larger than you and your quit, you will feel a sense of accountability. Trust me, it works. I'm 119 days quit and I was the guy that would never quit. My family loves my quit, but I love it more than they possibly could. God bless all the cops. soxffn
Yes I was reading in the April section and plan on posting there, my ass better be ready - there is no quarter given in there. It's pretty brutal I have to take a stand though and I believe this will work. Thanks for your response.
Matt
Post that roll, brother. The brutality is generally reserved for liars and cavers, you have a clean slate. Jump in and post roll and brutally say FUCK YOU to all forms of nicotine delivery and that motherfucker Marty Barrington.
Posted - I think I did it correctly. Thanks. One question though; I am to log in every day until my 100 days and post just as I did? with an updated day count and reaffirmation of my commitment to quitting?
Yes, you posted clean. Yes, log in every day as early as possible and commit to quitting for the current day. Day 100 will take care of itself on day 100. You are welcome to post in any and all quit groups; it is customary to post roll in a group before joining in any discussions. Get some phone numbers from the Apes so you have a backup for roll and a lifeline for cave prevention.
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Come quit with us. After 5-6 days quit, you will be needing support because it's all mental now. Your brain needs to learn how to function without nicotine in the drivers seat. Once you are part of something larger than you and your quit, you will feel a sense of accountability. Trust me, it works. I'm 119 days quit and I was the guy that would never quit. My family loves my quit, but I love it more than they possibly could. God bless all the cops. soxffn
Yes I was reading in the April section and plan on posting there, my ass better be ready - there is no quarter given in there. It's pretty brutal I have to take a stand though and I believe this will work. Thanks for your response.
Matt
Post that roll, brother. The brutality is generally reserved for liars and cavers, you have a clean slate. Jump in and post roll and brutally say FUCK YOU to all forms of nicotine delivery and that motherfucker Marty Barrington.
Posted - I think I did it correctly. Thanks. One question though; I am to log in every day until my 100 days and post just as I did? with an updated day count and reaffirmation of my commitment to quitting?
Yes, you posted clean. Yes, log in every day as early as possible and commit to quitting for the current day. Day 100 will take care of itself on day 100. You are welcome to post in any and all quit groups; it is customary to post roll in a group before joining in any discussions. Get some phone numbers from the Apes so you have a backup for roll and a lifeline for cave prevention.
Rgr. thanks.
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I guess I just never really wanted to quit for myself, when I came to that realization I guess it hit me how selfish I was being and how selfish I am with regards to keeping this habit. Then I got mad, really mad, that I (felt) like was being held hostage by this drug / chemical that I cannot get the courage/strength to stop - for good.
You should just put the period after the "quit for myself." In order for this to work, there is only one person you need to quit for. You. This has to be selfish and you shouldn't feel bad about it. Look at it this way, if you want to be there for those kids, if you want to enjoy this family you have built, then YOU need to quit for YOU. Not them. They will reap the benefits of you quitting for you and being around for them. I know...it sounds backwards, but it's not. Too often have we "tried" to quit for someone only to fail. Here we don't try to quit we quit and we do it for ourselves. Every successful badass on this site is quitting for themselves. In time, the quit grows into many things, but for now, just focus on you.
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I guess I just never really wanted to quit for myself, when I came to that realization I guess it hit me how selfish I was being and how selfish I am with regards to keeping this habit. Then I got mad, really mad, that I (felt) like was being held hostage by this drug / chemical that I cannot get the courage/strength to stop - for good.
You should just put the period after the "quit for myself." In order for this to work, there is only one person you need to quit for. You. This has to be selfish and you shouldn't feel bad about it. Look at it this way, if you want to be there for those kids, if you want to enjoy this family you have built, then YOU need to quit for YOU. Not them. They will reap the benefits of you quitting for you and being around for them. I know...it sounds backwards, but it's not. Too often have we "tried" to quit for someone only to fail. Here we don't try to quit we quit and we do it for ourselves. Every successful badass on this site is quitting for themselves. In time, the quit grows into many things, but for now, just focus on you.
There is no better gift for you to give to yourself or your family than this quit. You will and have received some kick ass advice... Here is mine... Right now, take all that you can from this site and its members. Read and listen, and most importantly post roll first thing every day. Do it the second your eyes open. It is clear from reading your intro that you are a man of your word, and posting roll and maintaining your integrity will keep you on the path, one day at a time, to a much easier drive on the quit highway.
Once you get stronger, and you will, switch from taking to giving. Reach out to some newer quitters and feed them some of the strength that you will have achieved. You won't believe how much this will help you, and others.
From one Christmas Eve quitter (2012) to another... Get ready to enjoy the happiest new year you've had in a long time. You are really gonna like the new you. If I can help or if you need another contact - send me a pm. Proud to quit with you today!
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I guess I just never really wanted to quit for myself, when I came to that realization I guess it hit me how selfish I was being and how selfish I am with regards to keeping this habit. Then I got mad, really mad, that I (felt) like was being held hostage by this drug / chemical that I cannot get the courage/strength to stop - for good.
You should just put the period after the "quit for myself." In order for this to work, there is only one person you need to quit for. You. This has to be selfish and you shouldn't feel bad about it. Look at it this way, if you want to be there for those kids, if you want to enjoy this family you have built, then YOU need to quit for YOU. Not them. They will reap the benefits of you quitting for you and being around for them. I know...it sounds backwards, but it's not. Too often have we "tried" to quit for someone only to fail. Here we don't try to quit we quit and we do it for ourselves. Every successful badass on this site is quitting for themselves. In time, the quit grows into many things, but for now, just focus on you.
Steak and Work to Win - You both had very poignant and helpful posts-
And yes I agree wholeheartedly - like i have said on here before, i always lose things in translation from my brain to finger tips - when it comes to what is in my brain and what i write out.
I meant to write/imply/relay; I want (and have wanted) to quit and all attempts at trying to quit before failed because they were for other people.
Where as the reason I kept my habit was purely selfish because I enjoyed and loved it. I am embarrassed to say that a majority of days it was the one thing I looked forward to every morning/evening and all the time in-between (if thats not selfish i don't know what is). It took me from my family in little snips of time / energy / and resources.
I never viewed the can "Kicking" or "killing" as selfish (only selfish to keep it) - but that does put it into a different perspective for me, shift the paradigm so to speak... Yeah man its a wicked habit - I hate it - i want to live, I don't want die. Yeah I can be selfish in that regard. Hopefully i don't add more confusion to my ramblings with that.
Thanks for your reply you guys are awesome!
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You have the attitude that is needed and are off to a great start. Don't worry about any day but today. Looking beyond the present leads to failure. It will suck until it doesn't.
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You have the attitude that is needed and are off to a great start. Don't worry about any day but today. Looking beyond the present leads to failure. It will suck until it doesn't.
"It will suck until it doesn't." Awesome! - love it. I think that sentence describes exactly what it means to quit (or at least a good summation of the physical/mental process). Thanks for the words man - it is appreciated.
Matt
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Your name and young Quit has attracted some Legit BadAssMotherFuckedness. I like it. I wish my name did that. Give us another day mañana.
Vadge 'ninja'
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Matthew,
Welcome! You are right these are some very good "dudes." I am in law enforcement myself and have been for 23 years this January. I quit 12/24/12 and could not have done it without Worktowin and the gang. As cops we seem to let our non-police friends fade away and then from there we make few non cop friends along the way. Before you know it you are swimming in a sea of negativity. Chewing is probably engrained in everything you do from showering in the morning, to driving etc. I don't think I wrote a report for 20 years without a dip in. The few times I would try to quit, some prick co-worker would wave a can around under my nose before he took a pinch. I realize now this was his guilt not mine, but very disrespectful nonetheless. These guys aren't those guys. Always post roll and nobody said it would be easy. Expect a fight. It's a fight worth having though. Don't believe me? Next time you're tempted to take a dip, look your children in the eye. If you decide to take that dip, tell them the can is more important then them. I know its harsh but it is reality. Don't look down on the crackheads till you look deep within yourself. Advice? 1) post roll everyday 2) never get cocky 3) gum, seeds, fake 4) use your support group
Enough of that. If you EVER need anything or feel like you are going to cave, call me, pm me or Worktowin or the countless others on this board. They are now your brothers. I would say good luck but luck is for losers. GO WIN!
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Matthew,
Welcome! You are right these are some very good "dudes." I am in law enforcement myself and have been for 23 years this January. I quit 12/24/12 and could not have done it without Worktowin and the gang. As cops we seem to let our non-police friends fade away and then from there we make few non cop friends along the way. Before you know it you are swimming in a sea of negativity. Chewing is probably engrained in everything you do from showering in the morning, to driving etc. I don't think I wrote a report for 20 years without a dip in. The few times I would try to quit, some prick co-worker would wave a can around under my nose before he took a pinch. I realize now this was his guilt not mine, but very disrespectful nonetheless. These guys aren't those guys. Always post roll and nobody said it would be easy. Expect a fight. It's a fight worth having though. Don't believe me? Next time you're tempted to take a dip, look your children in the eye. If you decide to take that dip, tell them the can is more important then them. I know its harsh but it is reality. Don't look down on the crackheads till you look deep within yourself. Advice? 1) post roll everyday 2) never get cocky 3) gum, seeds, fake 4) use your support group
Enough of that. If you EVER need anything or feel like you are going to cave, call me, pm me or Worktowin or the countless others on this board. They are now your brothers. I would say good luck but luck is for losers. GO WIN!
OB - Thanks for the words, and thank you for your service to this country and your community.
And it is true, I had a good laugh when I read about "no-police friends"- My wife is constantly on me about attending church and school functions, wanting to invite people over for dinner whom she has met.... I just wont do it...
I just flat out tell her that I simply can not relate to/with people out side of my comfort zone/social circle. It is terribly anti-social and I know it. It is also counter productive to quitting (anything) - off duty its time to drink beer and have a dip with others in our subculture.
I was reading life expectancy of healthy LEO's and it's not good, when you compound that with alcoholism and tobacco related illnesses, its down right rotten. Anyhow, fighting the demons one day (and one demon) at a time...
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Hey Flatfoot, you are not here by accident, and you are not alone.
Your story has been told many, many times here. There are a shit-ton of LEO and LEO related members here, too. Just stay out of the Politics thread. 'winker'
In any event, great job on week one. It was said earlier - This is going to suck, until it doesn't. Just keep coming back.
At one point, you posed the question - Do you just show up and post roll for your first 100 days, and that's it? 'finger point'
Quit today. That's all you gotta worry abour right now. Just today. Give us your word (which you have) and keep it today. Fuck everything else.
As to the 100 days part, well, that's a discussion for another time, maybe, but know this - no one is cured from this addiction. It is a daily fight. I encourage you to look at this community as your new, second home. No one in your life gets you like we do, and that's no shit. It doesn't take but a mere matter of minutes to post your promise, so continue to do that. While you're here, walk the halls. Check out other rooms. Exchange stories. You'll find some other crazy bastards tha you can connect with, I promise. Surround yourself with accountability so that you can NOT fail. That's the magic of this place. Before you know it, you'll be knocking on your 2nd, 3rd, 12th floor in no time.
Welcome to the best decision you ever made. Stay safe out there.
-Nolaq - Day 1,751
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Hey Flatfoot, you are not here by accident, and you are not alone.
Your story has been told many, many times here. There are a shit-ton of LEO and LEO related members here, too. Just stay out of the Politics thread. 'winker'
In any event, great job on week one. It was said earlier - This is going to suck, until it doesn't. Just keep coming back.
At one point, you posed the question - Do you just show up and post roll for your first 100 days, and that's it? 'finger point'
Quit today. That's all you gotta worry abour right now. Just today. Give us your word (which you have) and keep it today. Fuck everything else.
As to the 100 days part, well, that's a discussion for another time, maybe, but know this - no one is cured from this addiction. It is a daily fight. I encourage you to look at this community as your new, second home. No one in your life gets you like we do, and that's no shit. It doesn't take but a mere matter of minutes to post your promise, so continue to do that. While you're here, walk the halls. Check out other rooms. Exchange stories. You'll find some other crazy bastards tha you can connect with, I promise. Surround yourself with accountability so that you can NOT fail. That's the magic of this place. Before you know it, you'll be knocking on your 2nd, 3rd, 12th floor in no time.
Welcome to the best decision you ever made. Stay safe out there.
-Nolaq - Day 1,751
Nola, Thanks for the words and advice. I appreciate you taking the time. I am amazed at the support / wisdom / camaraderie I have already experienced on this site. It is something special and I am very lucky to have found this community.
Matt
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Hey Flatfoot, you are not here by accident, and you are not alone.
Your story has been told many, many times here. There are a shit-ton of LEO and LEO related members here, too. Just stay out of the Politics thread. 'winker'
In any event, great job on week one. It was said earlier - This is going to suck, until it doesn't. Just keep coming back.
At one point, you posed the question - Do you just show up and post roll for your first 100 days, and that's it? 'finger point'
Quit today. That's all you gotta worry abour right now. Just today. Give us your word (which you have) and keep it today. Fuck everything else.
As to the 100 days part, well, that's a discussion for another time, maybe, but know this - no one is cured from this addiction. It is a daily fight. I encourage you to look at this community as your new, second home. No one in your life gets you like we do, and that's no shit. It doesn't take but a mere matter of minutes to post your promise, so continue to do that. While you're here, walk the halls. Check out other rooms. Exchange stories. You'll find some other crazy bastards tha you can connect with, I promise. Surround yourself with accountability so that you can NOT fail. That's the magic of this place. Before you know it, you'll be knocking on your 2nd, 3rd, 12th floor in no time.
Welcome to the best decision you ever made. Stay safe out there.
-Nolaq - Day 1,751
Nola, Thanks for the words and advice. I appreciate you taking the time. I am amazed at the support / wisdom / camaraderie I have already experienced on this site. It is something special and I am very lucky to have found this community.
Matt
You need anything, don't hesitate to shout. Just shoot me a PM. Not sure how savy you are, but click the PM button under my name. I didn't know dick about message boards when I showed up here.
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***UPDATE 1 - DAY 7***
Based on the advice of someone wiser than me I am going to write out how and what I have been feeling, so that I may come to this (at a later date) and read it and remember how the nicotine made me feel. Unfortunately, I only found this site yesterday, so I am just going to throw a little background in there and pick up here.
This time with quitting I have been resisting the urge to drink (but have supplemented with 12 y/o bottle of Scotch in extreme circumstances) and it has made it incredibly difficult to sleep. I have been exercising (running and hiking in the National Park behind my house).
Anyhow, to describe how I feel: Soreness in my mouth / cheeks, dry / dehydrated, terrible headache - it switches from near my temples to the back of my head. Really saliva-y (is that a word?) like I am constantly producing saliva. And yes like I am in a fog / My cravings today are probably the worst since I quit - and I don't know why. I have bags of seeds and big red gum, but I keep reaching to my cargo pocket in my pants, I guess out of habit... Trying to slam as much water as possible, took some electrolyte tabs today and they seem to be helping as well.
Still feeling really motivated to uphold my promise that I made to the April quitters, and the guys who I am in contact with.
Has anyone taken Unisom or anything to help with sleep? Was thinking about hollering at the old lady to pick some up at the store today.
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Congratulations, your body is healing after years of abuse and poisoning. Your sleep will come back, I think folks used that NyQuil ZZZZZZ stuff here as well. A week is bad ass!
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Congratulations, your body is healing after years of abuse and poisoning. Your sleep will come back, I think folks used that NyQuil ZZZZZZ stuff here as well. A week is bad ass!
Thanks Thumblewort, it helps to hear first hand from those who have successfully navigated the road before. I appreciate your time and words.
On another note - just got done reading The Story of Tom and Jenny Kern, wow any cravings I had are completely gone. Man, such a hard thing to read, and a prime example of why, when I was using tobacco regularly avoided stories of the sort - its too easy to put your head in the sand and carry on with what is easy. Just wish I would have read that earlier. My heart breaks for his wife and children, such a devastating poison.
If anyone reading this needs any sort of motivation to get you through a tough patch - go read that story. Anyhow, I read the first two yesterday and Tom and Jenny's today. It has helped to space those out and read them in times of weakness or doubt - at least for me...
Alright - take care y'all gotta commute home!
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Sleep was very difficult, and it was a few weeks until I had a decent night of sleep. Even today, at day 42, my sleep is at about 85 percent of normal.
And I felt nauseated for the first several weeks. I just read at night, suffered, often had oatmeal for dinner (easy to digest---another common problem).
Just stick it out one day at a time, and know that it does get better, much better.
On a good note, your mouth is healing. For me, at about 2 weeks, I could taste more (and I began to appreciate just how bad the office coffee is).
Stay strong and stay active with KTC, my friend.
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Sleep was very difficult, and it was a few weeks until I had a decent night of sleep. Even today, at day 42, my sleep is at about 85 percent of normal.
And I felt nauseated for the first several weeks. I just read at night, suffered, often had oatmeal for dinner (easy to digest---another common problem).
Just stick it out one day at a time, and know that it does get better, much better.
On a good note, your mouth is healing. For me, at about 2 weeks, I could taste more (and I began to appreciate just how bad the office coffee is).
Stay strong and stay active with KTC, my friend.
This is a great post. Look at the bullshit that nicotine put us through! Oatmeal for dinner... No sleep... Mouth sores...
Man it feels good to quit. One day at a time all of this will work itself out. In the meantime, doesn't it make you angry to read this stuff?!?!
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Welcome and enjoy the suck. Remember every sweet moment so you don't ever have to do this again. Savor every spectacular second of your crawling through this shit pipe to freedom.
Congrats.
I quit with you today.
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***UPDATE 1 - DAY 7***
Based on the advice of someone wiser than me I am going to write out how and what I have been feeling, so that I may come to this (at a later date) and read it and remember how the nicotine made me feel. Unfortunately, I only found this site yesterday, so I am just going to throw a little background in there and pick up here.
This time with quitting I have been resisting the urge to drink (but have supplemented with 12 y/o bottle of Scotch in extreme circumstances) and it has made it incredibly difficult to sleep. I have been exercising (running and hiking in the National Park behind my house).
Anyhow, to describe how I feel: Soreness in my mouth / cheeks, dry / dehydrated, terrible headache - it switches from near my temples to the back of my head. Really saliva-y (is that a word?) like I am constantly producing saliva. And yes like I am in a fog / My cravings today are probably the worst since I quit - and I don't know why. I have bags of seeds and big red gum, but I keep reaching to my cargo pocket in my pants, I guess out of habit... Trying to slam as much water as possible, took some electrolyte tabs today and they seem to be helping as well.
Still feeling really motivated to uphold my promise that I made to the April quitters, and the guys who I am in contact with.
Has anyone taken Unisom or anything to help with sleep? Was thinking about hollering at the old lady to pick some up at the store today.
I highly recommend logging how your quit is progressing through your Intro. I did not and I don't remember details like I wish I did.
The sleep will come back. I slept 4-5 restless hours a night for the first 5-7 weeks. Then from about day 70-90 I couldn't get enough. Was sleeping like a rock for 9-10 hours a night. It finally leveled out.
I had the "saliva-y" too. Really strange. Last 50-60 days.
Congrats on the quit. Just keep grinding.
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Sleep was very difficult, and it was a few weeks until I had a decent night of sleep. Even today, at day 42, my sleep is at about 85 percent of normal.
And I felt nauseated for the first several weeks. I just read at night, suffered, often had oatmeal for dinner (easy to digest---another common problem).
Just stick it out one day at a time, and know that it does get better, much better.
On a good note, your mouth is healing. For me, at about 2 weeks, I could taste more (and I began to appreciate just how bad the office coffee is).
Stay strong and stay active with KTC, my friend.
Stat - yes thank you i meant to bring that up - reading has been my most effective sleep strategy - a glass of scotch usually just makes me want more scotch, and I'll crave a dip as well. Thanks for sharing your experiences. And HAH! - Office coffee yes. terrible i think thats a universal consistent.
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Sleep was very difficult, and it was a few weeks until I had a decent night of sleep. Even today, at day 42, my sleep is at about 85 percent of normal.
And I felt nauseated for the first several weeks. I just read at night, suffered, often had oatmeal for dinner (easy to digest---another common problem).
Just stick it out one day at a time, and know that it does get better, much better.
On a good note, your mouth is healing. For me, at about 2 weeks, I could taste more (and I began to appreciate just how bad the office coffee is).
Stay strong and stay active with KTC, my friend.
This is a great post. Look at the bullshit that nicotine put us through! Oatmeal for dinner... No sleep... Mouth sores...
Man it feels good to quit. One day at a time all of this will work itself out. In the meantime, doesn't it make you angry to read this stuff?!?!
Work to Win - yes reading it i feel the anger growing within, and i am terribly pissed off that I have allowed tobacco to effectively dominate my life for the past 20+ years. Never again, not one more day. Thanks for swinging by!
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Welcome and enjoy the suck. Remember every sweet moment so you don't ever have to do this again. Savor every spectacular second of your crawling through this shit pipe to freedom.
Congrats.
I quit with you today.
Grizz, thanks man - appreciate the enthusiasm - its amazing what a difference being involved with a community of people who have walked this road before, can make in ones attempt to recover their life from this poison.
-
***UPDATE 1 - DAY 7***
Based on the advice of someone wiser than me I am going to write out how and what I have been feeling, so that I may come to this (at a later date) and read it and remember how the nicotine made me feel. Unfortunately, I only found this site yesterday, so I am just going to throw a little background in there and pick up here.
This time with quitting I have been resisting the urge to drink (but have supplemented with 12 y/o bottle of Scotch in extreme circumstances) and it has made it incredibly difficult to sleep. I have been exercising (running and hiking in the National Park behind my house).
Anyhow, to describe how I feel: Soreness in my mouth / cheeks, dry / dehydrated, terrible headache - it switches from near my temples to the back of my head. Really saliva-y (is that a word?) like I am constantly producing saliva. And yes like I am in a fog / My cravings today are probably the worst since I quit - and I don't know why. I have bags of seeds and big red gum, but I keep reaching to my cargo pocket in my pants, I guess out of habit... Trying to slam as much water as possible, took some electrolyte tabs today and they seem to be helping as well.
Still feeling really motivated to uphold my promise that I made to the April quitters, and the guys who I am in contact with.
Has anyone taken Unisom or anything to help with sleep? Was thinking about hollering at the old lady to pick some up at the store today.
I highly recommend logging how your quit is progressing through your Intro. I did not and I don't remember details like I wish I did.
The sleep will come back. I slept 4-5 restless hours a night for the first 5-7 weeks. Then from about day 70-90 I couldn't get enough. Was sleeping like a rock for 9-10 hours a night. It finally leveled out.
I had the "saliva-y" too. Really strange. Last 50-60 days.
Congrats on the quit. Just keep grinding.
Jabr, Well it is great to hear that someone else had that salivating - man its a little obnoxious but i find if I drink enough water it minimizes the amount it bugs me. Thanks for sharing your experience, it means a lot that you took the time to swing by and say hey, and share what you went through.
Thanks!
-
I'm liking what I'm seeing here. Early Quit stats. 8 days quit, Joined KTC on day 6. 2 days into quit, posting roll, and has over 28 posts. Reading up on the site and the intro board. This is one of the early April 2015 leaders.
BAMF, keep it up. All that shit I just wrote is pure badassery on your part. That's how you take a hold of a quit, build a foundation on which to quit, rally support, and Quit Like Fuck. Already, if you cave, the disappointment will run very deep and your hypocrisy will be monumental (this is what you want). People are watching and getting inspired by what you are doing. Store this in the back of your mind each time she whispers in your ear. This accountability you've already built is your ammo to beat her ass down every time.
Now, with that said, happy new year. Waking up tomorrow free of dip will be a liberating experience. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE))
-
I'm liking what I'm seeing here. Early Quit stats. 8 days quit, Joined KTC on day 6. 2 days into quit, posting roll, and has over 28 posts. Reading up on the site and the intro board. This is one of the early April 2015 leaders.
BAMF, keep it up. All that shit I just wrote is pure badassery on your part. That's how you take a hold of a quit, build a foundation on which to quit, rally support, and Quit Like Fuck. Already, if you cave, the disappointment will run very deep and your hypocrisy will be monumental (this is what you want). People are watching and getting inspired by what you are doing. Store this in the back of your mind each time she whispers in your ear. This accountability you've already built is your ammo to beat her ass down every time.
Now, with that said, happy new year. Waking up tomorrow free of dip will be a liberating experience. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE))
Thanks Steak, this community has gotten me further than I have every gotten on my own - I am really excited about the system and its principles. And it is keeping me quit, so I will be here every day.
As a man I hate (and hated) to admit that I need help. But holy crap, being addicted to nicotine is no joke, and when I felt out of control (20+ years down the line), this website fell into my lap when I was having a serious craving on day 6 - it was like the light went on.
Anyhow, I've already said too much sappy stuff, so I'll shut it for now. But yeah thanks go out to y'all - glad to be here, one day at a time.
-
I'm liking what I'm seeing here. Early Quit stats. 8 days quit, Joined KTC on day 6. 2 days into quit, posting roll, and has over 28 posts. Reading up on the site and the intro board. This is one of the early April 2015 leaders.
BAMF, keep it up. All that shit I just wrote is pure badassery on your part. That's how you take a hold of a quit, build a foundation on which to quit, rally support, and Quit Like Fuck. Already, if you cave, the disappointment will run very deep and your hypocrisy will be monumental (this is what you want). People are watching and getting inspired by what you are doing. Store this in the back of your mind each time she whispers in your ear. This accountability you've already built is your ammo to beat her ass down every time.
Now, with that said, happy new year. Waking up tomorrow free of dip will be a liberating experience. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE))
Thanks Steak, this community has gotten me further than I have every gotten on my own - I am really excited about the system and its principles. And it is keeping me quit, so I will be here every day.
As a man I hate (and hated) to admit that I need help. But holy crap, being addicted to nicotine is no joke, and when I felt out of control (20+ years down the line), this website fell into my lap when I was having a serious craving on day 6 - it was like the light went on.
Anyhow, I've already said too much sappy stuff, so I'll shut it for now. But yeah thanks go out to y'all - glad to be here, one day at a time.
As you get to know people on here, find out where your supporters post roll and support them. That's what I and many successfully quitters do. You will be entangles in a quit web where picking up a can will not be an option. Myself, I know there are scores of people that know about my quit and that fact helps me keep me quit.
I have been letting my mind reprogram itself from 30 years of nicotine soakage. It takes time. It's not easy. I just know that I've shut the door on nicotine because I don't do that nasty shit anymore.
-
I'm liking what I'm seeing here. Early Quit stats. 8 days quit, Joined KTC on day 6. 2 days into quit, posting roll, and has over 28 posts. Reading up on the site and the intro board. This is one of the early April 2015 leaders.
BAMF, keep it up. All that shit I just wrote is pure badassery on your part. That's how you take a hold of a quit, build a foundation on which to quit, rally support, and Quit Like Fuck. Already, if you cave, the disappointment will run very deep and your hypocrisy will be monumental (this is what you want). People are watching and getting inspired by what you are doing. Store this in the back of your mind each time she whispers in your ear. This accountability you've already built is your ammo to beat her ass down every time.
Now, with that said, happy new year. Waking up tomorrow free of dip will be a liberating experience. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE))
Thanks Steak, this community has gotten me further than I have every gotten on my own - I am really excited about the system and its principles. And it is keeping me quit, so I will be here every day.
As a man I hate (and hated) to admit that I need help. But holy crap, being addicted to nicotine is no joke, and when I felt out of control (20+ years down the line), this website fell into my lap when I was having a serious craving on day 6 - it was like the light went on.
Anyhow, I've already said too much sappy stuff, so I'll shut it for now. But yeah thanks go out to y'all - glad to be here, one day at a time.
As you get to know people on here, find out where your supporters post roll and support them. That's what I and many successfully quitters do. You will be entangles in a quit web where picking up a can will not be an option. Myself, I know there are scores of people that know about my quit and that fact helps me keep me quit.
I have been letting my mind reprogram itself from 30 years of nicotine soakage. It takes time. It's not easy. I just know that I've shut the door on nicotine because I don't do that nasty shit anymore.
I am posting this this to get my mind off the crave...
I was feeling really good today, morning started out great. Got a call from a counterpart at another agency that he wanted to set up a meeting with me and my chain of command.
No problem right - easy morning meet and greet?
Well I just get out of a high level meeting with my boss sitting next to me and I can smell the pungent aroma of Copenhagen from his breath the whole time and my counterpart across the table spitting into his Styrofoam cup. So here's me - I pulled out a little box of Gobstoppers out of my cargo pocket and the meeting came to an abrupt halt. They were staring at me like a pulled a bag of weed out of my pocket"
So I had to explain my decision to quit chewing to these guys, haha it was pretty comical!
"No body likes a quitter!" "I been doin this for 30 years!" "Now just where and the hell am I gonna get a dip if I run out in the middle of the day?" "Yeah, we'll see how long that lasts" "You'll be back at it by Monday, mark my word"
- to be honest I almost caved, but I didn't, I am back in my office posting this! I was reluctant to even admit that because it is embarrassing, but man, my brain was trying to talk me into it.
***side note - I hate saying to be honest, I think it should be eliminated from all vocabulary - every time you speak it should be honest, and people should know that - to preface a statement with "to be honest" insinuates you lie every other time you speak without that preface.
Sorry for posting something that is probably only anecdotal to me.
Have a great day guys, Il'll be lurking.
EDIT*** I meant to tell Sox thanks for stopping by and I will start checking out other threads of my supporters.
-
I'm liking what I'm seeing here. Early Quit stats. 8 days quit, Joined KTC on day 6. 2 days into quit, posting roll, and has over 28 posts. Reading up on the site and the intro board. This is one of the early April 2015 leaders.
BAMF, keep it up. All that shit I just wrote is pure badassery on your part. That's how you take a hold of a quit, build a foundation on which to quit, rally support, and Quit Like Fuck. Already, if you cave, the disappointment will run very deep and your hypocrisy will be monumental (this is what you want). People are watching and getting inspired by what you are doing. Store this in the back of your mind each time she whispers in your ear. This accountability you've already built is your ammo to beat her ass down every time.
Now, with that said, happy new year. Waking up tomorrow free of dip will be a liberating experience. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE))
Thanks Steak, this community has gotten me further than I have every gotten on my own - I am really excited about the system and its principles. And it is keeping me quit, so I will be here every day.
As a man I hate (and hated) to admit that I need help. But holy crap, being addicted to nicotine is no joke, and when I felt out of control (20+ years down the line), this website fell into my lap when I was having a serious craving on day 6 - it was like the light went on.
Anyhow, I've already said too much sappy stuff, so I'll shut it for now. But yeah thanks go out to y'all - glad to be here, one day at a time.
As you get to know people on here, find out where your supporters post roll and support them. That's what I and many successfully quitters do. You will be entangles in a quit web where picking up a can will not be an option. Myself, I know there are scores of people that know about my quit and that fact helps me keep me quit.
I have been letting my mind reprogram itself from 30 years of nicotine soakage. It takes time. It's not easy. I just know that I've shut the door on nicotine because I don't do that nasty shit anymore.
I am posting this this to get my mind off the crave...
I was feeling really good today, morning started out great. Got a call from a counterpart at another agency that he wanted to set up a meeting with me and my chain of command.
No problem right - easy morning meet and greet?
Well I just get out of a high level meeting with my boss sitting next to me and I can smell the pungent aroma of Copenhagen from his breath the whole time and my counterpart across the table spitting into his Styrofoam cup. So here's me - I pulled out a little box of Gobstoppers out of my cargo pocket and the meeting came to an abrupt halt. They were staring at me like a pulled a bag of weed out of my pocket"
So I had to explain my decision to quit chewing to these guys, haha it was pretty comical!
"No body likes a quitter!" "I been doin this for 30 years!" "Now just where and the hell am I gonna get a dip if I run out in the middle of the day?" "Yeah, we'll see how long that lasts" "You'll be back at it by Monday, mark my word"
- to be honest I almost caved, but I didn't, I am back in my office posting this! I was reluctant to even admit that because it is embarrassing, but man, my brain was trying to talk me into it.
***side note - I hate saying to be honest, I think it should be eliminated from all vocabulary - every time you speak it should be honest, and people should know that - to preface a statement with "to be honest" insinuates you lie every other time you speak without that preface.
Sorry for posting something that is probably only anecdotal to me.
Have a great day guys, Il'll be lurking.
EDIT*** I meant to tell Sox thanks for stopping by and I will start checking out other threads of my supporters.
Nah... Don't be sorry about anything you barf up in your intro dude. As long as it's a part of you being active in cementing your quit foundation... Let it all hang out. I say it all'a time... Get involved and stay involved. Work it. Own it. Freedom comes at a price and you're paying it. Keep laying it down and fairly soon you'll start to get a glimpse of that freedom. It will take on an entirely new meaning for you the further from day 1 you keep going. It just keeps getting better and better and better and...
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Nah... Don't be sorry about anything you barf up in your intro dude. As long as it's a part of you being active in cementing your quit foundation... Let it all hang out. I say it all'a time... Get involved and stay involved. Work it. Own it. Freedom comes at a price and you're paying it. Keep laying it down and fairly soon you'll start to get a glimpse of that freedom. It will take on an entirely new meaning for you the further from day 1 you keep going. It just keeps getting better and better and better and...
Thanks Applejack, while I was pondering a part of your post:
"It will take on an entirely new meaning for you the further from day 1 you keep going. It just keeps getting better and better and better and..."
and I was just thinking of something that is sad: the fact that I have spent more years alive on this planet with chew, than without. And all of my adult years, and all of my married years, all of my years with my children have all been clouded with nicotine - what a terrible addiction of mine and time consuming obsession - so wasteful on so many levels.
That being said, I wanted to ***UPDATE*** my physical/mental status catalogue for Day 8:
My mouth feels a lot better, It was a little sore this AM but I am attributing that to an overzealous floss job I did last night.'
Sleep last night was the best I have had since stopping nicotine, no alcohol or sleep aid used, tossed and turned a little, had to get up for the head twice, drinking a lot of water.
Cravings are still here, but are more subtle (I forgot to write this, in the beginning they almost seem involuntary, like your mind tells you, that you have no choice but to submit to this craving - I don't like that feeling at all).
I am able to be around people (I have to for work) who are dipping and not lose my mind.
Headache is still here but I am able to get by without any ibuproferen/Tylenol (I would liken it to being dehydrated and that type of headache) a la - the day after a tremendous work out type headache.
I had a totally freaky dream that I was pulling my teeth out and they were falling out last night - and they were brittle and cracking.
I am going to try and wean myself off of omeprazole (for heartburn stomach acid) - I think I have been taking that daily for around 7-8 years. I don't feel like I need it, but time will tell.
Laters yall - Matt
-
I'm liking what I'm seeing here. Early Quit stats. 8 days quit, Joined KTC on day 6. 2 days into quit, posting roll, and has over 28 posts. Reading up on the site and the intro board. This is one of the early April 2015 leaders.
BAMF, keep it up. All that shit I just wrote is pure badassery on your part. That's how you take a hold of a quit, build a foundation on which to quit, rally support, and Quit Like Fuck. Already, if you cave, the disappointment will run very deep and your hypocrisy will be monumental (this is what you want). People are watching and getting inspired by what you are doing. Store this in the back of your mind each time she whispers in your ear. This accountability you've already built is your ammo to beat her ass down every time.
Now, with that said, happy new year. Waking up tomorrow free of dip will be a liberating experience. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE))
Thanks Steak, this community has gotten me further than I have every gotten on my own - I am really excited about the system and its principles. And it is keeping me quit, so I will be here every day.
As a man I hate (and hated) to admit that I need help. But holy crap, being addicted to nicotine is no joke, and when I felt out of control (20+ years down the line), this website fell into my lap when I was having a serious craving on day 6 - it was like the light went on.
Anyhow, I've already said too much sappy stuff, so I'll shut it for now. But yeah thanks go out to y'all - glad to be here, one day at a time.
As you get to know people on here, find out where your supporters post roll and support them. That's what I and many successfully quitters do. You will be entangles in a quit web where picking up a can will not be an option. Myself, I know there are scores of people that know about my quit and that fact helps me keep me quit.
I have been letting my mind reprogram itself from 30 years of nicotine soakage. It takes time. It's not easy. I just know that I've shut the door on nicotine because I don't do that nasty shit anymore.
I am posting this this to get my mind off the crave...
I was feeling really good today, morning started out great. Got a call from a counterpart at another agency that he wanted to set up a meeting with me and my chain of command.
No problem right - easy morning meet and greet?
Well I just get out of a high level meeting with my boss sitting next to me and I can smell the pungent aroma of Copenhagen from his breath the whole time and my counterpart across the table spitting into his Styrofoam cup. So here's me - I pulled out a little box of Gobstoppers out of my cargo pocket and the meeting came to an abrupt halt. They were staring at me like a pulled a bag of weed out of my pocket"
So I had to explain my decision to quit chewing to these guys, haha it was pretty comical!
"No body likes a quitter!" "I been doin this for 30 years!" "Now just where and the hell am I gonna get a dip if I run out in the middle of the day?" "Yeah, we'll see how long that lasts" "You'll be back at it by Monday, mark my word"
- to be honest I almost caved, but I didn't, I am back in my office posting this! I was reluctant to even admit that because it is embarrassing, but man, my brain was trying to talk me into it.
***side note - I hate saying to be honest, I think it should be eliminated from all vocabulary - every time you speak it should be honest, and people should know that - to preface a statement with "to be honest" insinuates you lie every other time you speak without that preface.
Sorry for posting something that is probably only anecdotal to me.
Have a great day guys, Il'll be lurking.
EDIT*** I meant to tell Sox thanks for stopping by and I will start checking out other threads of my supporters.
Good job, BAMF. Everybody that works around me and for me dips. It was like walking thru hell everyday for the first month. Luckily, I quit during a slow time at work. Pretty much just went to my office everyday and locked the door.
-
I'm liking what I'm seeing here. Early Quit stats. 8 days quit, Joined KTC on day 6. 2 days into quit, posting roll, and has over 28 posts. Reading up on the site and the intro board. This is one of the early April 2015 leaders.
BAMF, keep it up. All that shit I just wrote is pure badassery on your part. That's how you take a hold of a quit, build a foundation on which to quit, rally support, and Quit Like Fuck. Already, if you cave, the disappointment will run very deep and your hypocrisy will be monumental (this is what you want). People are watching and getting inspired by what you are doing. Store this in the back of your mind each time she whispers in your ear. This accountability you've already built is your ammo to beat her ass down every time.
Now, with that said, happy new year. Waking up tomorrow free of dip will be a liberating experience. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE))
Thanks Steak, this community has gotten me further than I have every gotten on my own - I am really excited about the system and its principles. And it is keeping me quit, so I will be here every day.
As a man I hate (and hated) to admit that I need help. But holy crap, being addicted to nicotine is no joke, and when I felt out of control (20+ years down the line), this website fell into my lap when I was having a serious craving on day 6 - it was like the light went on.
Anyhow, I've already said too much sappy stuff, so I'll shut it for now. But yeah thanks go out to y'all - glad to be here, one day at a time.
As you get to know people on here, find out where your supporters post roll and support them. That's what I and many successfully quitters do. You will be entangles in a quit web where picking up a can will not be an option. Myself, I know there are scores of people that know about my quit and that fact helps me keep me quit.
I have been letting my mind reprogram itself from 30 years of nicotine soakage. It takes time. It's not easy. I just know that I've shut the door on nicotine because I don't do that nasty shit anymore.
I am posting this this to get my mind off the crave...
I was feeling really good today, morning started out great. Got a call from a counterpart at another agency that he wanted to set up a meeting with me and my chain of command.
No problem right - easy morning meet and greet?
Well I just get out of a high level meeting with my boss sitting next to me and I can smell the pungent aroma of Copenhagen from his breath the whole time and my counterpart across the table spitting into his Styrofoam cup. So here's me - I pulled out a little box of Gobstoppers out of my cargo pocket and the meeting came to an abrupt halt. They were staring at me like a pulled a bag of weed out of my pocket"
So I had to explain my decision to quit chewing to these guys, haha it was pretty comical!
"No body likes a quitter!" "I been doin this for 30 years!" "Now just where and the hell am I gonna get a dip if I run out in the middle of the day?" "Yeah, we'll see how long that lasts" "You'll be back at it by Monday, mark my word"
- to be honest I almost caved, but I didn't, I am back in my office posting this! I was reluctant to even admit that because it is embarrassing, but man, my brain was trying to talk me into it.
***side note - I hate saying to be honest, I think it should be eliminated from all vocabulary - every time you speak it should be honest, and people should know that - to preface a statement with "to be honest" insinuates you lie every other time you speak without that preface.
Sorry for posting something that is probably only anecdotal to me.
Have a great day guys, Il'll be lurking.
EDIT*** I meant to tell Sox thanks for stopping by and I will start checking out other threads of my supporters.
Good job, BAMF. Everybody that works around me and for me dips. It was like walking thru hell everyday for the first month. Luckily, I quit during a slow time at work. Pretty much just went to my office everyday and locked the door.
JABR, thanks dude. Yeah tactical reverse to the office has been my best move so far. Thankfully most are understanding, there are a few that try to sabotage and defeat anyone trying to quit. But thankfully i have this place as my fall back / reserve unit to help me out.
Happy new years! 2015 dip free!
-
I'm liking what I'm seeing here. Early Quit stats. 8 days quit, Joined KTC on day 6. 2 days into quit, posting roll, and has over 28 posts. Reading up on the site and the intro board. This is one of the early April 2015 leaders.
BAMF, keep it up. All that shit I just wrote is pure badassery on your part. That's how you take a hold of a quit, build a foundation on which to quit, rally support, and Quit Like Fuck. Already, if you cave, the disappointment will run very deep and your hypocrisy will be monumental (this is what you want). People are watching and getting inspired by what you are doing. Store this in the back of your mind each time she whispers in your ear. This accountability you've already built is your ammo to beat her ass down every time.
Now, with that said, happy new year. Waking up tomorrow free of dip will be a liberating experience. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE))
Thanks Steak, this community has gotten me further than I have every gotten on my own - I am really excited about the system and its principles. And it is keeping me quit, so I will be here every day.
As a man I hate (and hated) to admit that I need help. But holy crap, being addicted to nicotine is no joke, and when I felt out of control (20+ years down the line), this website fell into my lap when I was having a serious craving on day 6 - it was like the light went on.
Anyhow, I've already said too much sappy stuff, so I'll shut it for now. But yeah thanks go out to y'all - glad to be here, one day at a time.
As you get to know people on here, find out where your supporters post roll and support them. That's what I and many successfully quitters do. You will be entangles in a quit web where picking up a can will not be an option. Myself, I know there are scores of people that know about my quit and that fact helps me keep me quit.
I have been letting my mind reprogram itself from 30 years of nicotine soakage. It takes time. It's not easy. I just know that I've shut the door on nicotine because I don't do that nasty shit anymore.
I am posting this this to get my mind off the crave...
I was feeling really good today, morning started out great. Got a call from a counterpart at another agency that he wanted to set up a meeting with me and my chain of command.
No problem right - easy morning meet and greet?
Well I just get out of a high level meeting with my boss sitting next to me and I can smell the pungent aroma of Copenhagen from his breath the whole time and my counterpart across the table spitting into his Styrofoam cup. So here's me - I pulled out a little box of Gobstoppers out of my cargo pocket and the meeting came to an abrupt halt. They were staring at me like a pulled a bag of weed out of my pocket"
So I had to explain my decision to quit chewing to these guys, haha it was pretty comical!
"No body likes a quitter!" "I been doin this for 30 years!" "Now just where and the hell am I gonna get a dip if I run out in the middle of the day?" "Yeah, we'll see how long that lasts" "You'll be back at it by Monday, mark my word"
- to be honest I almost caved, but I didn't, I am back in my office posting this! I was reluctant to even admit that because it is embarrassing, but man, my brain was trying to talk me into it.
***side note - I hate saying to be honest, I think it should be eliminated from all vocabulary - every time you speak it should be honest, and people should know that - to preface a statement with "to be honest" insinuates you lie every other time you speak without that preface.
Sorry for posting something that is probably only anecdotal to me.
Have a great day guys, Il'll be lurking.
EDIT*** I meant to tell Sox thanks for stopping by and I will start checking out other threads of my supporters.
Good job, BAMF. Everybody that works around me and for me dips. It was like walking thru hell everyday for the first month. Luckily, I quit during a slow time at work. Pretty much just went to my office everyday and locked the door.
JABR, thanks dude. Yeah tactical reverse to the office has been my best move so far. Thankfully most are understanding, there are a few that try to sabotage and defeat anyone trying to quit. But thankfully i have this place as my fall back / reserve unit to help me out.
Happy new years! 2015 dip free!
Just read as much of the content on the site as you can. Start with the Words of Wisdom. Then do the Hall of Fame Speeches. Endless amounts of wisdom and perspective.
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I'm liking what I'm seeing here. Early Quit stats. 8 days quit, Joined KTC on day 6. 2 days into quit, posting roll, and has over 28 posts. Reading up on the site and the intro board. This is one of the early April 2015 leaders.
BAMF, keep it up. All that shit I just wrote is pure badassery on your part. That's how you take a hold of a quit, build a foundation on which to quit, rally support, and Quit Like Fuck. Already, if you cave, the disappointment will run very deep and your hypocrisy will be monumental (this is what you want). People are watching and getting inspired by what you are doing. Store this in the back of your mind each time she whispers in your ear. This accountability you've already built is your ammo to beat her ass down every time.
Now, with that said, happy new year. Waking up tomorrow free of dip will be a liberating experience. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLCEUpIg8rE))
Thanks Steak, this community has gotten me further than I have every gotten on my own - I am really excited about the system and its principles. And it is keeping me quit, so I will be here every day.
As a man I hate (and hated) to admit that I need help. But holy crap, being addicted to nicotine is no joke, and when I felt out of control (20+ years down the line), this website fell into my lap when I was having a serious craving on day 6 - it was like the light went on.
Anyhow, I've already said too much sappy stuff, so I'll shut it for now. But yeah thanks go out to y'all - glad to be here, one day at a time.
As you get to know people on here, find out where your supporters post roll and support them. That's what I and many successfully quitters do. You will be entangles in a quit web where picking up a can will not be an option. Myself, I know there are scores of people that know about my quit and that fact helps me keep me quit.
I have been letting my mind reprogram itself from 30 years of nicotine soakage. It takes time. It's not easy. I just know that I've shut the door on nicotine because I don't do that nasty shit anymore.
I am posting this this to get my mind off the crave...
I was feeling really good today, morning started out great. Got a call from a counterpart at another agency that he wanted to set up a meeting with me and my chain of command.
No problem right - easy morning meet and greet?
Well I just get out of a high level meeting with my boss sitting next to me and I can smell the pungent aroma of Copenhagen from his breath the whole time and my counterpart across the table spitting into his Styrofoam cup. So here's me - I pulled out a little box of Gobstoppers out of my cargo pocket and the meeting came to an abrupt halt. They were staring at me like a pulled a bag of weed out of my pocket"
So I had to explain my decision to quit chewing to these guys, haha it was pretty comical!
"No body likes a quitter!" "I been doin this for 30 years!" "Now just where and the hell am I gonna get a dip if I run out in the middle of the day?" "Yeah, we'll see how long that lasts" "You'll be back at it by Monday, mark my word"
- to be honest I almost caved, but I didn't, I am back in my office posting this! I was reluctant to even admit that because it is embarrassing, but man, my brain was trying to talk me into it.
***side note - I hate saying to be honest, I think it should be eliminated from all vocabulary - every time you speak it should be honest, and people should know that - to preface a statement with "to be honest" insinuates you lie every other time you speak without that preface.
Sorry for posting something that is probably only anecdotal to me.
Have a great day guys, Il'll be lurking.
EDIT*** I meant to tell Sox thanks for stopping by and I will start checking out other threads of my supporters.
Good job, BAMF. Everybody that works around me and for me dips. It was like walking thru hell everyday for the first month. Luckily, I quit during a slow time at work. Pretty much just went to my office everyday and locked the door.
JABR, thanks dude. Yeah tactical reverse to the office has been my best move so far. Thankfully most are understanding, there are a few that try to sabotage and defeat anyone trying to quit. But thankfully i have this place as my fall back / reserve unit to help me out.
Happy new years! 2015 dip free!
Just read as much of the content on the site as you can. Start with the Words of Wisdom. Then do the Hall of Fame Speeches. Endless amounts of wisdom and perspective.
Love me some kickass quit going on in here. Nice job BAMF. QLF with you today.
ZC
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How're things BAMF? You good?
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How're things BAMF? You good?
Yeah brother, just set out CY2015 budget with the old lady, gonna be a good year to not poison myself. and save some money in the process. Finally sleeping at night, still get the craves but again more subtle. And every time I do I text someone or get on here... One day at a time - sometimes one minute at a time. So far so good.
Thanks for stopping by and asking I appreciate the time and words!
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BAMF....was a pleasure meeting with you the other day.
I am quit with you today!
Cheers.
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BAMF....was a pleasure meeting with you the other day.
I am quit with you today!
Cheers.
Thanks CLB and likewise! She's a nasty ole twat that nicotine, we'll defeat her - you guys are awesome thanks for the support.
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I am journaling and cataloguing my quit, so this is just an update for me to look back on.
***UPDATE*** 01/05/2015 (DAY 13)
So the holidays are over and I am glad to be back at work, or so I thought, this place gives me the craves like nothing else. The craves are, however, much easier to deal with. Lots of water / big red gum / Jalapeño sunflower seeds (though lately gum and seeds have not been as important) - Mainly lots of water - if I'm in extreme duress or time of boredom: gum/seeds.
Most of the physical discomfort I experienced through the first week - has abated (no more headaches, no more extreme salivating, my jaws and cheeks don't ache and tingle anymore, my pooper seems to be functioning at regular capacity/intervals, etc..).
I would say the worst remaining thing is sleep. Some nights have been good, and those will trick me into thinking I'm good to go. Most nights are sleepless and I toss and turn. Even with a little Benadryl it doesn't help, I just feel unrested AND groggy, so no more of that. Exercise seems to be the key here for me, If I hit the weights or play a game of basketball I sleep better.
If I could recommend anything to a new quitter it would be to put the booze down for a while. That is probably my biggest off-duty trigger. When I put it down, the craves were much easier to deal with at home. I was never a huge drinker, but on weekends and during holidays I liked to imbibe (especially football season - that's a holiday, right?).
Additional info to add to this vignette: I am hungry all the time; I have moments where I have to scream into my vest so I don't smash someone in the face, yaya rage baby!!; I have stopped with the Omeprazole for the first time in several years, wow that is pretty huge, no more acid medicine all because I put the can down -- that's actually probably one of the best things/side effects I have experienced since putting it down.
In a nut shell: Water, exercise = Good. Booze, Benadryl = bad (For me)
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I am journaling and cataloguing my quit, so this is just an update for me to look back on.
***UPDATE*** 01/05/2015 (DAY 13)
So the holidays are over and I am glad to be back at work, or so I thought, this place gives me the craves like nothing else. The craves are, however, much easier to deal with. Lots of water / big red gum / Jalapeño sunflower seeds (though lately gum and seeds have not been as important) - Mainly lots of water - if I'm in extreme duress or time of boredom: gum/seeds.
Most of the physical discomfort I experienced through the first week - has abated (no more headaches, no more extreme salivating, my jaws and cheeks don't ache and tingle anymore, my pooper seems to be functioning at regular capacity/intervals, etc..).
I would say the worst remaining thing is sleep. Some nights have been good, and those will trick me into thinking I'm good to go. Most nights are sleepless and I toss and turn. Even with a little Benadryl it doesn't help, I just feel unrested AND groggy, so no more of that. Exercise seems to be the key here for me, If I hit the weights or play a game of basketball I sleep better.
If I could recommend anything to a new quitter it would be to put the booze down for a while. That is probably my biggest off-duty trigger. When I put it down, the craves were much easier to deal with at home. I was never a huge drinker, but on weekends and during holidays I liked to imbibe (especially football season - that's a holiday, right?).
Additional info to add to this vignette: I am hungry all the time; I have moments where I have to scream into my vest so I don't smash someone in the face, yaya rage baby!!; I have stopped with the Omeprazole for the first time in several years, wow that is pretty huge, no more acid medicine all because I put the can down -- that's actually probably one of the best things/side effects I have experienced since putting it down.
In a nut shell: Water, exercise = Good. Booze, Benadryl = bad (For me)
Nice quit going BAMF. Good job chronicling your quit here, and I like your advice to the new quitters to lay off the booze for a while. It is the hugest of triggers. I quit with you today!
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I am journaling and cataloguing my quit, so this is just an update for me to look back on.
***UPDATE*** 01/05/2015 (DAY 13)
So the holidays are over and I am glad to be back at work, or so I thought, this place gives me the craves like nothing else. The craves are, however, much easier to deal with. Lots of water / big red gum / Jalapeño sunflower seeds (though lately gum and seeds have not been as important) - Mainly lots of water - if I'm in extreme duress or time of boredom: gum/seeds.
Most of the physical discomfort I experienced through the first week - has abated (no more headaches, no more extreme salivating, my jaws and cheeks don't ache and tingle anymore, my pooper seems to be functioning at regular capacity/intervals, etc..).
I would say the worst remaining thing is sleep. Some nights have been good, and those will trick me into thinking I'm good to go. Most nights are sleepless and I toss and turn. Even with a little Benadryl it doesn't help, I just feel unrested AND groggy, so no more of that. Exercise seems to be the key here for me, If I hit the weights or play a game of basketball I sleep better.
If I could recommend anything to a new quitter it would be to put the booze down for a while. That is probably my biggest off-duty trigger. When I put it down, the craves were much easier to deal with at home. I was never a huge drinker, but on weekends and during holidays I liked to imbibe (especially football season - that's a holiday, right?).
Additional info to add to this vignette: I am hungry all the time; I have moments where I have to scream into my vest so I don't smash someone in the face, yaya rage baby!!; I have stopped with the Omeprazole for the first time in several years, wow that is pretty huge, no more acid medicine all because I put the can down -- that's actually probably one of the best things/side effects I have experienced since putting it down.
In a nut shell: Water, exercise = Good. Booze, Benadryl = bad (For me)
Nice quit going BAMF. Good job chronicling your quit here, and I like your advice to the new quitters to lay off the booze for a while. It is the hugest of triggers. I quit with you today!
Thanks Zillah - and go Seahawks!
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I am journaling and cataloguing my quit, so this is just an update for me to look back on.
***UPDATE*** 01/05/2015 (DAY 13)
So the holidays are over and I am glad to be back at work, or so I thought, this place gives me the craves like nothing else. The craves are, however, much easier to deal with. Lots of water / big red gum / Jalapeño sunflower seeds (though lately gum and seeds have not been as important) - Mainly lots of water - if I'm in extreme duress or time of boredom: gum/seeds.
Most of the physical discomfort I experienced through the first week - has abated (no more headaches, no more extreme salivating, my jaws and cheeks don't ache and tingle anymore, my pooper seems to be functioning at regular capacity/intervals, etc..).
I would say the worst remaining thing is sleep. Some nights have been good, and those will trick me into thinking I'm good to go. Most nights are sleepless and I toss and turn. Even with a little Benadryl it doesn't help, I just feel unrested AND groggy, so no more of that. Exercise seems to be the key here for me, If I hit the weights or play a game of basketball I sleep better.
If I could recommend anything to a new quitter it would be to put the booze down for a while. That is probably my biggest off-duty trigger. When I put it down, the craves were much easier to deal with at home. I was never a huge drinker, but on weekends and during holidays I liked to imbibe (especially football season - that's a holiday, right?).
Additional info to add to this vignette: I am hungry all the time; I have moments where I have to scream into my vest so I don't smash someone in the face, yaya rage baby!!; I have stopped with the Omeprazole for the first time in several years, wow that is pretty huge, no more acid medicine all because I put the can down -- that's actually probably one of the best things/side effects I have experienced since putting it down.
In a nut shell: Water, exercise = Good. Booze, Benadryl = bad (For me)
Nice quit going BAMF. Good job chronicling your quit here, and I like your advice to the new quitters to lay off the booze for a while. It is the hugest of triggers. I quit with you today!
Thanks Zillah - and go Seahawks!
Try some melatonin. I forget what the recommended amount is but I know its worked for many folks here.
Your sleep cycle will regulate soon. I am guessing around 30 to 45 days I began sleeping like Rip Van Winkle.
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BAMF - hope all is going well. This site will change and save your life. Nicotine is a wicked addiction, but the process here will give you the ability to win one day at a time. Post roll every day.
If I can help ever let me know. Remember, the enemy is a plant.
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Remember, the enemy is a plant.
roflmao roflmao roflmao that puts it in perspective! Be smarter and stronger than a plant!
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Remember, the enemy is a plant.
roflmao roflmao roflmao that puts it in perspective! Be smarter and stronger than a plant!
Where is BAMF? He missed roll yesterday, and I don't see him on there today. Also, he didn't respond to my PM. April '15 members you need to get after this guy if you have digits.
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Remember, the enemy is a plant.
roflmao roflmao roflmao that puts it in perspective! Be smarter and stronger than a plant!
Where is BAMF? He missed roll yesterday, and I don't see him on there today. Also, he didn't respond to my PM. April '15 members you need to get after this guy if you have digits.
thinking up a new name perhaps?
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Remember, the enemy is a plant.
roflmao roflmao roflmao that puts it in perspective! Be smarter and stronger than a plant!
Where is BAMF? He missed roll yesterday, and I don't see him on there today. Also, he didn't respond to my PM. April '15 members you need to get after this guy if you have digits.
thinking up a new name perhaps?
C'mon brother....get back in here.
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Remember, the enemy is a plant.
roflmao roflmao roflmao that puts it in perspective! Be smarter and stronger than a plant!
Where is BAMF? He missed roll yesterday, and I don't see him on there today. Also, he didn't respond to my PM. April '15 members you need to get after this guy if you have digits.
thinking up a new name perhaps?
C'mon brother....get back in here.
Where you at?
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Remember, the enemy is a plant.
roflmao roflmao roflmao that puts it in perspective! Be smarter and stronger than a plant!
Where is BAMF? He missed roll yesterday, and I don't see him on there today. Also, he didn't respond to my PM. April '15 members you need to get after this guy if you have digits.
thinking up a new name perhaps?
C'mon brother....get back in here.
Where you at?
I've texted him 3 times now. Radio silence. If he ever decides to come back, he needs to understand that this isn't what brotherhood and accountability is all about. Cutting bait when the going gets tough is about as Anti-BAMF as you can get.
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Remember, the enemy is a plant.
roflmao roflmao roflmao that puts it in perspective! Be smarter and stronger than a plant!
Where is BAMF? He missed roll yesterday, and I don't see him on there today. Also, he didn't respond to my PM. April '15 members you need to get after this guy if you have digits.
thinking up a new name perhaps?
C'mon brother....get back in here.
Where you at?
I've texted him 3 times now. Radio silence. If he ever decides to come back, he needs to understand that this isn't what brotherhood and accountability is all about. Cutting bait when the going gets tough is about as Anti-BAMF as you can get.
Well said.