KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: tony on January 19, 2011, 05:50:00 PM
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Alright so while I was stressin, navigating through the site on day one, I was a retard and missed the introductions section and posted a little intro in the quit group. So, for those of you who haven't met me.. I'm 22, lurked around on the site for abit before I decided it was time to join and sign up on roll.
Started the nicotine addiction when I got out of high school. It was a retarded "lets do x before we graduate" list and thats where it started. First black and milds, to cigarettes, and I smoked those for about two years, off and on abit, sometimes stopping to chew the gum instead. Quit completely for a week or so, shipped off to basic training, and started sneaking dip in AIT, about once a week on pass. And then try to hide it in tree stumps but it usually got stolen. Anyways, came back, dip addiction ramped up to a can a day, every day for about a year and a half. Kinda swapped between dip and cigs depending on the mood but mostly stuck with cope straight or cope wintergreen. Tried quitting cold turkey, lasted 16 hours and caved. Decided to really give it my all instead of a half assed quit, which brings me to now. Before my quit, I cut my dipping down by about half for a few days, then completely stopped, and threw all my cans out the window on a drive home. Been going for about 80 hours nic free, working on day 4. Ive been posting roll. Got a couple cans of the nicotine free fake shit as a backup plan, otherwise Ive been mostly eating and chewing non nicotine gum non stop.
Been doing good with the withdrawl so far. It seems to be harder then when I quit smoking, I'm guessing its because the cope had more nicotine then the smokes did. It appears that I can concentrate now-day 1 and 2 that seemed impossible, I havent been getting headaches anymore either. Just an intense hunger and a dull crave followed by occasional intense craves but Ive been handling it ok without needing the fake stuff.
Good meeting you guys and glad I found a community with other people who like to help and are going through the same issue. Non nicotine users just dont seem to really understand how difficult it really is to stop.
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Non nicotine users just dont seem to really understand how difficult it really is to stop.
I didn't understand how difficult it was, until I finally committed to the quit. Welcome.
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I think I said this before, but welcome....it's good to have more servicemembers here, which is where there's a huge community of dippers.
I did the same thing you did, with cutting down the dip to half and then quitting altogether. It made it worse, I wish I would have just stopped cold turkey in the beginning. Lessons....ha!
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Thanks for the welcomes guys. Actually..the half deal seemed to work ok for me..I tried quitting before I cut in half..maybe I just didnt try hard enough but I got these horrible headaches and I caved. I havent gotten any of those headaches yet, I'm really hoping they don't come visit me. But I have aspirin this time if they do.
We used to joke around calling our platoon the smoking platoon because just about every dips or smokes. Not many have quit, alot switched over to those electronic cigs. Hoping maybe I can set some sort of example or be an inspiration to help others quit by staying strong in my own quit. But you know how stubborn people can be..
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Quit completely for a week or so, shipped off to basic training, and started sneaking dip in AIT, about once a week on pass. And then try to hide it in tree stumps but it usually got stolen.
Welcome Tony-
That part of your story took me back to when I was in basic back in 1988. I smuggled in a few cans from the snack truck when we were supposed to be at church. I would use my canteen as a spitter so I could chew in the barracks. Worked out well until I needed the canteen for it's actual purpose. I could never get the taste of skoal out of it.....fucking disgusting. Eventually I got caught during a locker inspection, they found a can stashed in my ruck sack. I had to do pushups over the open can, dipping my tongue into it before pushing up.
Ya, I hurled.
Brian
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Alright so while I was stressin, navigating through the site on day one, I was a retard and missed the introductions section and posted a little intro in the quit group. So, for those of you who haven't met me.. I'm 22, lurked around on the site for abit before I decided it was time to join and sign up on roll.
Started the nicotine addiction when I got out of high school. It was a retarded "lets do x before we graduate" list and thats where it started. First black and milds, to cigarettes, and I smoked those for about two years, off and on abit, sometimes stopping to chew the gum instead. Quit completely for a week or so, shipped off to basic training, and started sneaking dip in AIT, about once a week on pass. And then try to hide it in tree stumps but it usually got stolen. Anyways, came back, dip addiction ramped up to a can a day, every day for about a year and a half. Kinda swapped between dip and cigs depending on the mood but mostly stuck with cope straight or cope wintergreen. Tried quitting cold turkey, lasted 16 hours and caved. Decided to really give it my all instead of a half assed quit, which brings me to now. Before my quit, I cut my dipping down by about half for a few days, then completely stopped, and threw all my cans out the window on a drive home. Been going for about 80 hours nic free, working on day 4. Ive been posting roll. Got a couple cans of the nicotine free fake shit as a backup plan, otherwise Ive been mostly eating and chewing non nicotine gum non stop.
Been doing good with the withdrawl so far. It seems to be harder then when I quit smoking, I'm guessing its because the cope had more nicotine then the smokes did. It appears that I can concentrate now-day 1 and 2 that seemed impossible, I havent been getting headaches anymore either. Just an intense hunger and a dull crave followed by occasional intense craves but Ive been handling it ok without needing the fake stuff.
Good meeting you guys and glad I found a community with other people who like to help and are going through the same issue. Non nicotine users just dont seem to really understand how difficult it really is to stop.
Alright so while I was stressin, navigating through the site on day one, I was a retard and missed the introductions section and posted a little intro in the quit group. So, for those of you who haven't met me.. I'm 22, lurked around on the site for abit before I decided it was time to join and sign up on roll.
HA...okay, so you were swerving a bit right out of the gate...so what? The important thing is that you are here now and you are living NIC FREE!!! Well done, brother.
Post roll, keep your word, read everything you can on this site and and fight like hell to stay nic free. Great choice. You can do this!!!
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Welcome Tony and my fellow 12B to the Quit.
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Quit completely for a week or so, shipped off to basic training, and started sneaking dip in AIT, about once a week on pass. And then try to hide it in tree stumps but it usually got stolen.
Welcome Tony-
That part of your story took me back to when I was in basic back in 1988. I smuggled in a few cans from the snack truck when we were supposed to be at church. I would use my canteen as a spitter so I could chew in the barracks. Worked out well until I needed the canteen for it's actual purpose. I could never get the taste of skoal out of it.....fucking disgusting. Eventually I got caught during a locker inspection, they found a can stashed in my ruck sack. I had to do pushups over the open can, dipping my tongue into it before pushing up.
Ya, I hurled.
Brian
Hahah that sounds like it must have sucked hard. I never brought my shit back with me to the barracks-honestly dont know how I did it on sundays only, but other guys needed their fix. This one guy began slowly stockpiling rolls-honestly, no idea how he smuggled them back. He hid them in his ceiling tiles and he got the pouch type. He'd go to the latrine and sell -each- pouch for $10. Eventually someone ratted him out and the Drill Sgts tore apart our barracks, found the cans and we got smoked for hours.
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Quit completely for a week or so, shipped off to basic training, and started sneaking dip in AIT, about once a week on pass. And then try to hide it in tree stumps but it usually got stolen.
Welcome Tony-
That part of your story took me back to when I was in basic back in 1988. I smuggled in a few cans from the snack truck when we were supposed to be at church. I would use my canteen as a spitter so I could chew in the barracks. Worked out well until I needed the canteen for it's actual purpose. I could never get the taste of skoal out of it.....fucking disgusting. Eventually I got caught during a locker inspection, they found a can stashed in my ruck sack. I had to do pushups over the open can, dipping my tongue into it before pushing up.
Ya, I hurled.
Brian
Hahah that sounds like it must have sucked hard. I never brought my shit back with me to the barracks-honestly dont know how I did it on sundays only, but other guys needed their fix. This one guy began slowly stockpiling rolls-honestly, no idea how he smuggled them back. He hid them in his ceiling tiles and he got the pouch type. He'd go to the latrine and sell -each- pouch for $10. Eventually someone ratted him out and the Drill Sgts tore apart our barracks, found the cans and we got smoked for hours.
How the FUCK did you guys get SNACKS let alone DIP during basic training?
WTF?
Know what we got on Paris Island? Dirt! We got lots and lots of fucking dirt!
:angry:
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Quit completely for a week or so, shipped off to basic training, and started sneaking dip in AIT, about once a week on pass. And then try to hide it in tree stumps but it usually got stolen.
Welcome Tony-
That part of your story took me back to when I was in basic back in 1988. I smuggled in a few cans from the snack truck when we were supposed to be at church. I would use my canteen as a spitter so I could chew in the barracks. Worked out well until I needed the canteen for it's actual purpose. I could never get the taste of skoal out of it.....fucking disgusting. Eventually I got caught during a locker inspection, they found a can stashed in my ruck sack. I had to do pushups over the open can, dipping my tongue into it before pushing up.
Ya, I hurled.
Brian
Hahah that sounds like it must have sucked hard. I never brought my shit back with me to the barracks-honestly dont know how I did it on sundays only, but other guys needed their fix. This one guy began slowly stockpiling rolls-honestly, no idea how he smuggled them back. He hid them in his ceiling tiles and he got the pouch type. He'd go to the latrine and sell -each- pouch for $10. Eventually someone ratted him out and the Drill Sgts tore apart our barracks, found the cans and we got smoked for hours.
How the FUCK did you guys get SNACKS let alone DIP during basic training?
WTF?
Know what we got on Paris Island? Dirt! We got lots and lots of fucking dirt!
:angry:
How long ago were you in?
lol. I hear that from everyone that was in a while before me. But of course, isn't that the deal-always supposed to tell everyone younger then you "back WHEN I WENT THROUGH BASIC". Probably has gotten abit softer. During basic we didnt get passes like the fucking MP's did. They got passes in their 3rd week! We got nothing, typical 4 hours if your lucky sleep, 30 seconds to eat. Enterprising individuals stole food from the chow hall and started a black market, but that got our asses chewed for it.
I got dip when we started getting sunday passes during AIT, our job training portion. We'd get the day off basically and could go to the PX , but the drill sgts would continue to hunt around the post for privates fucking off.
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Quit completely for a week or so, shipped off to basic training, and started sneaking dip in AIT, about once a week on pass. And then try to hide it in tree stumps but it usually got stolen.
Welcome Tony-
That part of your story took me back to when I was in basic back in 1988. I smuggled in a few cans from the snack truck when we were supposed to be at church. I would use my canteen as a spitter so I could chew in the barracks. Worked out well until I needed the canteen for it's actual purpose. I could never get the taste of skoal out of it.....fucking disgusting. Eventually I got caught during a locker inspection, they found a can stashed in my ruck sack. I had to do pushups over the open can, dipping my tongue into it before pushing up.
Ya, I hurled.
Brian
Hahah that sounds like it must have sucked hard. I never brought my shit back with me to the barracks-honestly dont know how I did it on sundays only, but other guys needed their fix. This one guy began slowly stockpiling rolls-honestly, no idea how he smuggled them back. He hid them in his ceiling tiles and he got the pouch type. He'd go to the latrine and sell -each- pouch for $10. Eventually someone ratted him out and the Drill Sgts tore apart our barracks, found the cans and we got smoked for hours.
How the FUCK did you guys get SNACKS let alone DIP during basic training?
WTF?
Know what we got on Paris Island? Dirt! We got lots and lots of fucking dirt!
:angry:
How long ago were you in?
lol. I hear that from everyone that was in a while before me. But of course, isn't that the deal-always supposed to tell everyone younger then you "back WHEN I WENT THROUGH BASIC". Probably has gotten abit softer. During basic we didnt get passes like the fucking MP's did. They got passes in their 3rd week! We got nothing, typical 4 hours if your lucky sleep, 30 seconds to eat. Enterprising individuals stole food from the chow hall and started a black market, but that got our asses chewed for it.
I got dip when we started getting sunday passes during AIT, our job training portion. We'd get the day off basically and could go to the PX , but the drill sgts would continue to hunt around the post for privates fucking off.
Easy there Nolaq. Look at the terminology being used here. There is a big difference.
Basic training vs Boot camp
Latrine vs Head
Drill Sergeants vs D.I.s
Semper Fi brudda.
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Decided that the comments are getting too scattered around, so, due to popular request, I am going to archive all of my reality show like comments about the never ending April '11 quit group drama in here. Hopefully, this can be of epic lengths by the time we reach the HOF!!
For those of you unfamiliar and are wondering what exactly the fuck this is, I've started to respond to the drama in my own personal style. You could compare it to how LOOT responds to everything in third person. Instead, I make a reality show out of the endless bitching and turn it into..comedy. These comments can be found over in the April '11 Roll thread, I'm just archiving them here for anyone that wants to read them all at once.
Note-I only started doing this as of yesterday, but I am working on a prologue so that day 1 shit till the present can be included in some way.
======================================================
2/2/11 #1
*Reference-The very first comment made in this style. The usual drama slinging was occuring, and it was decided that it looked very much like a reality show. Due to popularity..the bulk of my comments have been made in this style since the incident*
*Imitates TV Commercial man voice* Tensions are rising in the April quit group house once more, as one of the members explains his past conquests of various addictions, a helping hand is extended..only to be..shit..all..over-find out what happens tonight, 6pm central, on QUITTERS!
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2/2/11 #2
*Reference-XrMatt had proclaimed that he was in his own quit group, which is where the bulk of this "episode" stems from, and that he didn't need the April quit group, however he appeared to continue to "live" in the April thread.*
Suddenly, a microphone buzzes. The announcers voice returns.
"Ladies and Gentleman, Xrmatt has just walked outside of the ravaged April house, screams still echoing in the background. About fifteen feet from the house, he pulls out a small coleman tent and pitches it near the doorway, within yelling distance. He sits in his tent, contemplating his quit alone, and every once in a while, comes out to pound his fists angrily on Aprils door before running back to his tent, diving inside. How long will this go on for until April organizes a task force to strike back? Find out tomorrow morning, only on, QUITTERS!"
The microphone buzzes once again, back from the brief commercial break advertising various brands of sunflower seeds, fake dip, and food products.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, it looks as though Mr. Xrmatt has once again left his tent. We observed as he walked up to the front door of April, slammed his hand against the door, and once again made a critical remark. Without even waiting for a reply, he turned around and headed back to his tent. He unstaked it, moving it approximately another 20 feet away from the house, but is still within yelling distance. Various members of the April group peeked curiously from the windows as Mr. XrMatt was observed raising a small flag above his one man tent, before he retreated inside. The flag was hard to read, significantly smaller in size then the dramatic "April Drama Queens" flag that billows in the wind above the April house.
"Faint grumblings can be heard all the way over at the April house for a few moments, until they taper off. The April members would occasionally peek outside their blinds, curious as to when Mr. Xrmatt was going to make his next assault on their already broken home, but for now, it appears as though the evening will commence in a somewhat normal fashion, for April anyways, for now. At least. Until Mr. XrMatt returns to beat his fists angrily upon April's door once more, perhaps even barraging inside once again to knock the lamp off the damn table again and take a giant shit on the floor, like he did last time. Please don't change that channel, as we break shortly for a commercial!"
======================================================
2/2/11 #3
"Welcome back, a brief thank you to our sponsors, Spitz seeds. A most curious incident has happened-yet another individual was observed fleeing April's house. a Mr. Chaos was seen strolling out the front door, in a slightly more dignified manner then Mr XrMatt. Although dusk has long since arrived, you could hear the flag rattling as he lowered it, pausing to sign his name alongside matts, before raising the tiny flag once more over the tent. Interestingly enough, he disappears inside, joining XrMatt inside. One has to wonder if a sort of brokeback mountain situation is occurring here. An April member, who happened to be outside taking a piss near the tent, heard sobs coming from inside-and this was after Mr Chaos had entered to join Mr. XrMatt. Very curious indeed.
*Scene flash back to April house*
"Suprisingly, it appears to be a rather peaceful evening in the April house. A N2everything is scouring a list, pen in hand, as he checks off the members that are accounted for. An eyebrow raises as he sighs, scratching his head and looking around for Teach. Another set of quitters were missing, and he told us he likened the job to herding cats, as it was near impossible to keep track of them all."
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2/2/11 #4
"It looks as thought the April house is about to get torn up once again tonight. Mr. Chaos, having finished doing whatever he was doing inside the tent with a Mr. Matt, just screamed outside the tent flap at N2. Apparently, visiting over at May's house, and signing their sheet, is the same as living inside of Aprils house, and signing their roll call sheet. Mr Chaos just informed N2 that it is HIS responsibility to traverse the Quitters vast nicotine free desert and track him down from every individual quit home for his signature. Ladies and gentlemen-please take cover, as N2 was just seen boiling over, headed over to one of the open windows on the April home to bellow back at Chaos. Unsurprisingly, the silence has been broken for the April house, and it won't be long before other residents are awakened by the noise"
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2/2/11 #5
*Reference-this was the summary statement tied into the Roll Call for 2/2/11*
RECAP
"Febuary 2nd's episode of QUITTERS proved to be exciting indeed. Our fabulous members Chaos and Matt have stormed out of the already broken home of April, and were last observed inside their own little tent pitched just outside of the House of April, a short distance off, but not so far away that they couldn't occasionally scream at the occupants of the House of April before quickly turning tail and diving inside the tent once more. A small flag was raised over this 2 man tent, on it, a April house member, under the cover of night, tagged "April Double Douchin Dildos". It remains to be seen what exactly this action will provoke.
Meanwhile, over at the House of April, the Drama Queen Deluxe flag continues to fly proudly as the heated bitching continues to fly, although the bulk of it these days is directed at the new rebel quit party. The second major source of frustration was witnessed as N2 and Teach struggled to herd the cats, a small group consisting of:
ASBO (3)
browniemanab (3)
colin_lea
MJS
MikeDubs
Mongu
One2ManyCans (2)
Wilco999(3)
is MIA. It can only be expected that when they come back dragging ass to April's front door, that its residents will pile out and promptly beat the shit out of them for missing their curfew and not signing role.
Thats all for today's recap, stay tuned for tomorrow!"
======================================================
2/3/11 #6
"Morning has arrived for the April '11 group, and once again, the usual slinging of drama is what kicks this morning off. As the sun rises over the horizon, the other residents of the April quit house gather to discuss exactly what the hell is going on-they had seen the second, smaller flag and the little tent in their front yard.
"The Veterans have arrived once again, from wherever they live in the desert. April's house was rapidly becoming their favorite place to spend their days in retirement. A few confused looks are again given towards the Double Douchin Dildo's flag and tent, but that answer would come later.
*scene jumps to the tent*
"We have yet to see or hear from Matt. Last time he was seen, he had beat his hands angrily upon April's front door, before hiding in his tent were he sobbed his way to sleep. However, Chaos is his new companion, and he started the morning out fresh by leaving his tent, and unsurprisingly, took a shit on April's door step. He then collected this shit, put it in a bag, and lit it on fire. Loot, one of the older Veterans, cracked the door open, jabbing him with a cane and informing him he had nothing to offer this community. Chaos proceeded to take a few steps back away from the door, pick up rocks, and throw them at April's windows. A diplomatic N2 attempted to dodge the rocks as he leaned out of a window. He somehow had it in him to forgive Chaos, something most of the other jeering residents of April did not, and begged him and Matt to pull down the Double Douchin Dildo's flag and come back home to April's house. So far, neither of the two members of the rebel quit party have yet to make a comment on the offer.
"As the rocks continued to fly from Chaos, Loot opened the door again, nostrils flaring momentarily from the prior shit burning smell and called out to Chaos, asking him a critical question in his typical third person style, before slamming the door to April's house once more and turning to head towards the living room, where the residents had gathered in their typical fashion, bitching about one topic or another. Today, that topic was the rebel quit group and what was to be done about it."
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2/3/11 #7
*Reference-the roll call list had been split, Drama Queen Quitters, with a recap, and the Double Douchin Dildos. This was promptly erased (but later restored, thanks teach) by teach*
"The bitching in the living room was interrupted momentarily as Teach emerged, the self proclaimed leader of the April house. His eyes wandered momentarily to the whiteboard hanging off the wall where the members scrawled their names each morning, pledging their quit. To the right of the names, was a short summary of the events that had happened the day before. His fists curled into anger as he seized the white board, ripping it off the wall. "What the fuck is this shit, this violation of my pure ROLL LIST!" he bellowed, as he swung it wildly around the room. "Noone..changes..the Roll list. It..is..sacred" he said, as he hung the now bent and battered board back upon the wall. The summary, MIA list, and the rebel's signatures, now gone and all integrated back into the rather bland and boring list."
======================================================
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Man, you guys are one drama-soaked quit group .... but hell, I'll support you as long as you are quit. In the end (no pun intended) that is the only thing that matters. You can fuck a llama with a cactus, doesn't matter, as long as you are quit.
Carry on.
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April gives me a headache, but at least it's a Quit headache. :wacko:
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Sonuvabitch...I call in roll for a few days and our quit group becomes a shit storm. I have enough drama with my 20 month old daughter.
Tony, you are the man. Keep it up. QUITTERS is my new favorite show. I'm ready to tape my "Confessional".....(sobbing)"This is...SO....HARD!(sniffle)LadyS says these seeds are making me fat and TIGERCB keeps stealing my Jolly Ranchers! WAAHAAHHH!!"
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I'm proud to say I'm on day 24 and gonna stay quit. So happy I'm part of the april quitters!! It's my birthday month and my 100 day quit month.
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Decided that the comments are getting too scattered around, so, due to popular request, I am going to archive all of my reality show like comments about the never ending April '11 quit group drama in here. Hopefully, this can be of epic lengths by the time we reach the HOF!!
For those of you unfamiliar and are wondering what exactly the fuck this is, I've started to respond to the drama in my own personal style. You could compare it to how LOOT responds to everything in third person. Instead, I make a reality show out of the endless bitching and turn it into..comedy. These comments can be found over in the April '11 Roll thread, I'm just archiving them here for anyone that wants to read them all at once.
Note-I only started doing this as of yesterday, but I am working on a prologue so that day 1 shit till the present can be included in some way.
======================================================
2/2/11 #1
*Reference-The very first comment made in this style. The usual drama slinging was occuring, and it was decided that it looked very much like a reality show. Due to popularity..the bulk of my comments have been made in this style since the incident*
*Imitates TV Commercial man voice* Tensions are rising in the April quit group house once more, as one of the members explains his past conquests of various addictions, a helping hand is extended..only to be..shit..all..over-find out what happens tonight, 6pm central, on QUITTERS!
======================================================
2/2/11 #2
*Reference-XrMatt had proclaimed that he was in his own quit group, which is where the bulk of this "episode" stems from, and that he didn't need the April quit group, however he appeared to continue to "live" in the April thread.*
Suddenly, a microphone buzzes. The announcers voice returns.
"Ladies and Gentleman, Xrmatt has just walked outside of the ravaged April house, screams still echoing in the background. About fifteen feet from the house, he pulls out a small coleman tent and pitches it near the doorway, within yelling distance. He sits in his tent, contemplating his quit alone, and every once in a while, comes out to pound his fists angrily on Aprils door before running back to his tent, diving inside. How long will this go on for until April organizes a task force to strike back? Find out tomorrow morning, only on, QUITTERS!"
The microphone buzzes once again, back from the brief commercial break advertising various brands of sunflower seeds, fake dip, and food products.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, it looks as though Mr. Xrmatt has once again left his tent. We observed as he walked up to the front door of April, slammed his hand against the door, and once again made a critical remark. Without even waiting for a reply, he turned around and headed back to his tent. He unstaked it, moving it approximately another 20 feet away from the house, but is still within yelling distance. Various members of the April group peeked curiously from the windows as Mr. XrMatt was observed raising a small flag above his one man tent, before he retreated inside. The flag was hard to read, significantly smaller in size then the dramatic "April Drama Queens" flag that billows in the wind above the April house.
"Faint grumblings can be heard all the way over at the April house for a few moments, until they taper off. The April members would occasionally peek outside their blinds, curious as to when Mr. Xrmatt was going to make his next assault on their already broken home, but for now, it appears as though the evening will commence in a somewhat normal fashion, for April anyways, for now. At least. Until Mr. XrMatt returns to beat his fists angrily upon April's door once more, perhaps even barraging inside once again to knock the lamp off the damn table again and take a giant shit on the floor, like he did last time. Please don't change that channel, as we break shortly for a commercial!"
======================================================
2/2/11 #3
"Welcome back, a brief thank you to our sponsors, Spitz seeds. A most curious incident has happened-yet another individual was observed fleeing April's house. a Mr. Chaos was seen strolling out the front door, in a slightly more dignified manner then Mr XrMatt. Although dusk has long since arrived, you could hear the flag rattling as he lowered it, pausing to sign his name alongside matts, before raising the tiny flag once more over the tent. Interestingly enough, he disappears inside, joining XrMatt inside. One has to wonder if a sort of brokeback mountain situation is occurring here. An April member, who happened to be outside taking a piss near the tent, heard sobs coming from inside-and this was after Mr Chaos had entered to join Mr. XrMatt. Very curious indeed.
*Scene flash back to April house*
"Suprisingly, it appears to be a rather peaceful evening in the April house. A N2everything is scouring a list, pen in hand, as he checks off the members that are accounted for. An eyebrow raises as he sighs, scratching his head and looking around for Teach. Another set of quitters were missing, and he told us he likened the job to herding cats, as it was near impossible to keep track of them all."
======================================================
2/2/11 #4
"It looks as thought the April house is about to get torn up once again tonight. Mr. Chaos, having finished doing whatever he was doing inside the tent with a Mr. Matt, just screamed outside the tent flap at N2. Apparently, visiting over at May's house, and signing their sheet, is the same as living inside of Aprils house, and signing their roll call sheet. Mr Chaos just informed N2 that it is HIS responsibility to traverse the Quitters vast nicotine free desert and track him down from every individual quit home for his signature. Ladies and gentlemen-please take cover, as N2 was just seen boiling over, headed over to one of the open windows on the April home to bellow back at Chaos. Unsurprisingly, the silence has been broken for the April house, and it won't be long before other residents are awakened by the noise"
======================================================
2/2/11 #5
*Reference-this was the summary statement tied into the Roll Call for 2/2/11*
RECAP
"Febuary 2nd's episode of QUITTERS proved to be exciting indeed. Our fabulous members Chaos and Matt have stormed out of the already broken home of April, and were last observed inside their own little tent pitched just outside of the House of April, a short distance off, but not so far away that they couldn't occasionally scream at the occupants of the House of April before quickly turning tail and diving inside the tent once more. A small flag was raised over this 2 man tent, on it, a April house member, under the cover of night, tagged "April Double Douchin Dildos". It remains to be seen what exactly this action will provoke.
Meanwhile, over at the House of April, the Drama Queen Deluxe flag continues to fly proudly as the heated bitching continues to fly, although the bulk of it these days is directed at the new rebel quit party. The second major source of frustration was witnessed as N2 and Teach struggled to herd the cats, a small group consisting of:
ASBO (3)
browniemanab (3)
colin_lea
MJS
MikeDubs
Mongu
One2ManyCans (2)
Wilco999(3)
is MIA. It can only be expected that when they come back dragging ass to April's front door, that its residents will pile out and promptly beat the shit out of them for missing their curfew and not signing role.
Thats all for today's recap, stay tuned for tomorrow!"
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2/3/11 #6
"Morning has arrived for the April '11 group, and once again, the usual slinging of drama is what kicks this morning off. As the sun rises over the horizon, the other residents of the April quit house gather to discuss exactly what the hell is going on-they had seen the second, smaller flag and the little tent in their front yard.
"The Veterans have arrived once again, from wherever they live in the desert. April's house was rapidly becoming their favorite place to spend their days in retirement. A few confused looks are again given towards the Double Douchin Dildo's flag and tent, but that answer would come later.
*scene jumps to the tent*
"We have yet to see or hear from Matt. Last time he was seen, he had beat his hands angrily upon April's front door, before hiding in his tent were he sobbed his way to sleep. However, Chaos is his new companion, and he started the morning out fresh by leaving his tent, and unsurprisingly, took a shit on April's door step. He then collected this shit, put it in a bag, and lit it on fire. Loot, one of the older Veterans, cracked the door open, jabbing him with a cane and informing him he had nothing to offer this community. Chaos proceeded to take a few steps back away from the door, pick up rocks, and throw them at April's windows. A diplomatic N2 attempted to dodge the rocks as he leaned out of a window. He somehow had it in him to forgive Chaos, something most of the other jeering residents of April did not, and begged him and Matt to pull down the Double Douchin Dildo's flag and come back home to April's house. So far, neither of the two members of the rebel quit party have yet to make a comment on the offer.
"As the rocks continued to fly from Chaos, Loot opened the door again, nostrils flaring momentarily from the prior shit burning smell and called out to Chaos, asking him a critical question in his typical third person style, before slamming the door to April's house once more and turning to head towards the living room, where the residents had gathered in their typical fashion, bitching about one topic or another. Today, that topic was the rebel quit group and what was to be done about it."
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2/3/11 #7
*Reference-the roll call list had been split, Drama Queen Quitters, with a recap, and the Double Douchin Dildos. This was promptly erased (but later restored, thanks teach) by teach*
"The bitching in the living room was interrupted momentarily as Teach emerged, the self proclaimed leader of the April house. His eyes wandered momentarily to the whiteboard hanging off the wall where the members scrawled their names each morning, pledging their quit. To the right of the names, was a short summary of the events that had happened the day before. His fists curled into anger as he seized the white board, ripping it off the wall. "What the fuck is this shit, this violation of my pure ROLL LIST!" he bellowed, as he swung it wildly around the room. "Noone..changes..the Roll list. It..is..sacred" he said, as he hung the now bent and battered board back upon the wall. The summary, MIA list, and the rebel's signatures, now gone and all integrated back into the rather bland and boring list."
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2/10/11 #8
*Reference-one of the group members had posted late to roll call, and a veteran promptly jumped in and bitched about how posting late is a no no until the event snowballed and there were multiple vets, mods and a few of Aprils members just completely bitching mostly all at the one member and a second that came to back him up. Typical April drama-condensed into a fine reality show episode
*And back from a short absence, everyones favorite reality show suddenly flashes on, taking over the previous snowy channel that had been disconnected from before*
"Thanks and welcome back toooo QUITTERS!!!! Today is a heated day in the house of April. A veteran, Jpine, happened to be lurking downstairs in the living room and observed one lospenguinos sneak downstairs and sign his name late to the whiteboard. Jpine shook his head, pulled out his phone and called his best buddies NOLAQ, and Loot. Soon, several veterans poured into the living room and ganked lospenguinos, tearing into him shark attack style about how late he signed his name onto the whiteboard. "Fuck you! I'll sign when I want to" lospenquinos cried out in agony, as the veterans descended on him, beating him with their walking canes. The loud noise woke up other members of the April house, who had been otherwise peaceful for the day, and they joined in on the drama as well, along with other veterans. Sadly, lospenguinos was turned upon by all the others for his late posting, until Chaos arrived, defending his fellow quitter and making a rather keen observation that there was little to no drama in the house until the Vets arrived and started beating the shit out of lospenguinos with their walking sticks. If we roll the tapes back here, watch"
*tapes roll back prior to lospenguinos signing, and continue all the way back to the start of the day*
"You can see Chaos *does* have a point. There was no bitching. However, do the veterans have a point with this suddenly brutal beating? Does it..tear..apart..the..very..fabric..of..this..group...to post late? Find out more on our next episode.."
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tony,
You either need to masturbate (solely this time, no Loot), or grab some Cheetos Brand Cron Puffs.
Just sayin'.
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..
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tony,
You either need to masturbate (solely this time, no Loot), or grab some Cheetos Brand Cron Puffs.
Just sayin'.
Doc says, masturbating once a day helps keep the cravings away
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Bump. For obvious reasons.
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Some of you may remember me (I was part of the infamous april 2011 group). I stopped posting roll around march and continued to be dip free until I made a mistake around octoberish. I was running off about 5 hours sleep total for a week, taking finals, and working night shifts and used that as an excuse, and I ended up buying a can of cope. It didn't take long after that to be back at my can a day habit, which continued from october till last sunday when I decided it was time to stop. I'm kind of in the fog now, although its not as bad as the first time I quit last january-I remember really losing control a few times with anger and literally just staring at my monitor for hours. This time, it sucks..but my temper is more in check and I have more focus. It would've been nice not to have slipped and be going down this road again lol. So I have returned..and I'm expecting to recieve some sort of ass kicking for my foolishness.
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I didn't want to hear your bullshit excuses, so I didn't even read past the first sentence.
You owe an explanation to April 2011. What happened? What are you going to do so that it doesn't happen again? Maybe apologize for letting them down.
You haven't posted a day 1 in May 2012 either yet... You owe them the same explanation as well, and to also let them know they have a retread amongst them.
We can forgive, but we will not forget.
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I let my guard down and went back to the stuff after having fallen asleep at the wheel 4x in a row at work. I couldn't think of anything else to stay awake with-I had tried 5 hrs, minithins (lol that was interesting), energy drinks. I was getting 30min sleep before a 11 hour night shift. I know I'm going to get some shit for that, and yeah I ended up staying awake but now I get to go through this again. In my messed up sleep deprived thinking I thought "well I'd rather deal with cope and get through tonight then drive into a tree". I know thats fucked up and a poor excuse, but its what i thought at the time. I should've just pulled over and napped or something. Or did what I finally ended up doing-quit that job. It would have been better to quit the job then to think that nicotine could honestly sustain me any better on that shift. I had 30 min sleep before school, 30 min sleep before work. Fortunately I don't have the night shifts anymore. I quit the job.
So now here I am again. I drew down from a can a day last week to a piece of gum every 12 hours or so, but with my obsessive personality, I was annoying myself with counting the number of hours all the time as to when I had had a piece last. So sunday, I stopped. I do need to throw the gum away, and I have several empty cans lying around that I need to dispose of. I've gone through this before, so I bought several bags of spitz sunflower seeds, and several cans of that beef jerky jack links fake chew stuff. The good thing about it all, is while I know this is a serious, and once again, epic quit phase I get to go through, is that I tend to get through my issues by laughing at myself later. I had one fit yesterday, I messed up on a homework assignment (network engineering student here) and made one tiny error which invalidated 3 hours worth of work. After some yelling and possibly throwing something, I realized I left the window open. lol. But that was the only temper tantrum I had yesterday. I seem to remember last year that my throat was sore from yelling so much.
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Wow. That's an amazing story. This is Sarcasm.
Now man up and go tell everyone else your special butterfly tale.
April 2011 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4159)
May 2012 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5841)
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Butterfly fairy tale? No..I won't lash out at you, even though my temper may be short. Are you trying to troll me in my introductory thread? I did man up..I quit.
Edit-Sorry I read that wrong. I'll go tell April and May.
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Butterfly fairy tale? No..I won't lash out at you, even though my temper may be short. Are you trying to troll me in my introductory thread? I did man up..I quit.
tony you should know its not gonna be that easy just to get back in... alot of people arent going to welcome you with open arms
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I think I had that as a disclaimer in my first post when I mentioned how I was probably going to recieve a ton of shit for posting here again. At least I'm not being a puss about my quit right now and making excuses and clinging onto the cans. Have to at least give me that. I just posted in April too btw, making my post now for May 2012.
If you guys don't want me here, I wont post here but I remember having a community did help me out the first time. I'm not exactly sure what my reperations are supposed to consist of but i did apologize in the april thread.
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May 2012 is missing a roll post and an explanation. Don't think of explaining your cave as a punishment, most of those guys aren't retreads, they haven't failed, and learning from your cave helps them tremendously so they don't make the same mistakes.
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I think my biggest mistake was not continuing to post roll.
edit-I didn't go into details on why i rationalized the cave at the time in the may thread. It seems like it would just be viewed as me trying to make excuses, which isn't the case-I know I slipped and no excuse can rationalize going back to dip again. Unless you want me to explain exactly why I bought the stuff again.
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Going into the details of WHY you caved should be as important to you as it is to your group. You all need to learn from it. "Why did you cave?" is not a simple question meant to embarrass you. It is meant to force you to identify and address your addict mind. You want to quit? You need to understand why you have failed in the past. You need to know what to watch for, and most importantly you need a real, no-bullshit plan for handling it.
You came here for a reason. You came back for a reason. You also failed for a reason; no one can tell you what that reason is. Remember the old adage - failing to plan is planning to fail.
You know what steps 1-3 are: post roll call, honor your word, repeat.
What else are you going to do to make sure step 2 is done? Are you going to get numbers? Be active in your group? What are YOU going to do?
Also, you really need to recognize this for what it is - a daily endeavor designed to save your life. This is not a "habit" you can break - you are addicted to nicotine and will always be an addict. the sooner you admit that to yourself, the easier it will be for you to honor your word and stay quit.
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I think my biggest mistake was not continuing to post roll.
and your 2nd biggest mistake was not having numbers and using them.
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Tony,
Right now it's the bottom of the ninth and the score is:
Addiction/nicotine/big tobacco: 1,000,000 Tony: 0
The good news is you only have to put one run on the board to win today.
You are right, all the reasons why you caved are excuses. The simple fact of the matter is that you are an addict. Personally I think you stopped posting roll because you knew deep down that the door was not shut on nicotine. Now I know that this is going to seem like I am busting your nuts, but, in all honesty, I do not see your posts here as showing the resolve that you are going to need to stay quit. At some point you will probably stop posting roll...and then it is only a matter of time before your addict brain takes over and starts romanticizing, starts rationalizing....then at a weak moment, you will relapse.
Why do I think that you knew deep down that the door was not shut? Well, you were here 60-70 days last time? How many times did you read of someone coming back and saying their biggest mistake was drifting/not posting roll? So that means one of two things is true 1) as mentioned before- you knew that you would return to active use...or....2) you thought that you were in some way immune to the weakness of others who had drifted from the site.
If the answer is #1 and you are coming back here for another "try", it will not be successful UNTIL you find a way to close the door. Read about Tom and Jenny Kern, the link is in May 2012's header....look at cancer pics, go to whyquit.com and read some stories there...whatever it takes to shut the door. No amount of advice or support is going to work until you get to the point where you are steadfast in your resolve to remain quit.
It the answer is #2, learn your lesson: YOU ARE AN ADDICT- and that is for life. The day to day battle to stay quit might get less intense, but your addict brain can remain dormant for many YEARS and then, in a moment of weakness and complacency, will take the opportunity to rationalize "just one". Posting roll here every day has the benefit of reminding you each day that you are an addict, and that there is no "just one".
At this point, the ball is in your court: I know you CAN quit....the question is: WILL you? What will you do to stay quit? Perhaps a better question is: what WON'T you do to stay quit.
Post Roll
Honor Your Promise
Repeat.
It's a life sentence, cupcake.
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...At least I'm not being a puss about my quit right now...Have to at least give me that.
Maybe I'm just a prick, but, NO...no, I don't have to give you anything. Today, I posted Day 720...I've yet to cave. I WILL NOT CAVE. I do not have to accept yours...or your attempt to "smooth: it over.
If you guys don't want me here, I wont post here
Martyr? Victim? If you want someone to hold your hand, it ain't happening.
I'm not exactly sure what my reperations are supposed to consist of but i did apologize in the april thread.
You made it nearly a hundred day? And you don't know the answer to this? Why do cavers come in and play dumb? It's complete and utter disrespect to all the quitters here...for you to say, "I was a member of this site but never cared enough to understand the way the site operates."
Yeah...explain why you CHOSE to BUY A CAN INSTEAD OF COMING ON HERE OR CALLING A BROTHER....I'd LOVE to hear that justification...
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Bump. I would like to offer my documentary services once again. I think it created a great distraction from the suck. PM me if you have a story you would like created into something like whats listed below.
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'Crazy'
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'Crazy'
Aren't we all?
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Tony,
Right now it's the bottom of the ninth and the score is:
Addiction/nicotine/big tobacco: 1,000,000 Tony: 0
The good news is you only have to put one run on the board to win today.
You are right, all the reasons why you caved are excuses. The simple fact of the matter is that you are an addict. Personally I think you stopped posting roll because you knew deep down that the door was not shut on nicotine. Now I know that this is going to seem like I am busting your nuts, but, in all honesty, I do not see your posts here as showing the resolve that you are going to need to stay quit. At some point you will probably stop posting roll...and then it is only a matter of time before your addict brain takes over and starts romanticizing, starts rationalizing....then at a weak moment, you will relapse.
Why do I think that you knew deep down that the door was not shut? Well, you were here 60-70 days last time? How many times did you read of someone coming back and saying their biggest mistake was drifting/not posting roll? So that means one of two things is true 1) as mentioned before- you knew that you would return to active use...or....2) you thought that you were in some way immune to the weakness of others who had drifted from the site.
If the answer is #1 and you are coming back here for another "try", it will not be successful UNTIL you find a way to close the door. Read about Tom and Jenny Kern, the link is in May 2012's header....look at cancer pics, go to whyquit.com and read some stories there...whatever it takes to shut the door. No amount of advice or support is going to work until you get to the point where you are steadfast in your resolve to remain quit.
It the answer is #2, learn your lesson: YOU ARE AN ADDICT- and that is for life. The day to day battle to stay quit might get less intense, but your addict brain can remain dormant for many YEARS and then, in a moment of weakness and complacency, will take the opportunity to rationalize "just one". Posting roll here every day has the benefit of reminding you each day that you are an addict, and that there is no "just one".
At this point, the ball is in your court: I know you CAN quit....the question is: WILL you? What will you do to stay quit? Perhaps a better question is: what WON'T you do to stay quit.
Post Roll
Honor Your Promise
Repeat.
It's a life sentence, cupcake.
Sorry for not replying to the responses in here, I have been entirely in May thus far. On day 10 now. I will not cave again..I've reflected on why I failed, and both of your reasons are correct 30. I didn't accept the fact that I am an addict, and because of that, I hadn't fully shut the door on nicotine.
Whether I post roll here or not is not the deciding factor in my quit, like I initially thought. What would I do if the site were to close down? I'd be screwed wouldn't I? I think I've realized now that my thinking was skewed in I thought it was just some 30-60 day process where I'd go through the w/d effects and it'd be solved and done for. That's where I made my mistake. I didn't buy into the addict for life mantra, and thats why I failed.
I'd also like to apologize for my ideas on quitting previously that I posted, I was incorrect on that as well. While having a positive attitude does help effect my quit, it won't prevent me from experiencing those 30, 60, 90 day funks. I don't remember having them the first time I went through this, but then again, I also didn't remember what it felt like being free from nicotine once I screwed up and fell back into its trap again. I'm starting to get that taste of freedom again, and I'm not going to let myself have to repeat this all over again.
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I've decided I'm going to keep copies of my "Days of Our Quits" over here in my intro thread, that way people can read them if they want to, without having to go through all the pages to find it.
For people that are seeing this and wondering what it is, I like to make up little summaries out of "notable" events that occurs during the course of the day and make it into almost a reality type show. It keeps my mind off the suck, and provides come free entertainment..
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#1
Welcome to the Days of Our Quits.
The May Quit house is the newest on the block, and theres been some issues lately deciding on a correct name for the group. The title on the quit roll call whiteboard has been wiped out and changed repeatedly, this started when FallingUp complained about the original “Fucking MayFlowers of May” title. This was soon replaced by ppolcyn with the “Goat Fuckers” title. Various individuals kept changing the name, and eventually it appeared to settle on a bland “May Quitters”. But this pales in comparison to the events of today-such as Ziesmer buying his kid whiskey.
The May Quitters had a close call with a cave, but Oma used his network and reached out for help. Unfortunately, someone else did not. This brings us to “The Stepping Stone” incident.
Those of the May quitters that weren’t off at work were gathered in the common room area of the May House. It was fairly peaceful, until Gldean walked into the house, looked at the rest of his group, and announced how he was gone for a few days, had a little bit of stress, caved, and blamed the incident on “a little stress”. He turned to walk back out the door but that exit would soon be blocked by the vets. A massive roar was let loose from the house, instantly catching the attention of a handful of vets who had been lurking in May’s front yard. “A cave” Colonel No Cope whispered to his brothers, and soon enough, vets from around the country side hauled ass to May’s living room to join in on beating some sense into Gldean. Gldean was silent, bruised and broken. The vets deemed their work complete, wiped their hands clean, and proceeded to exit from the May House.
Gldean looked back at his brothers and apologized. It wasn’t stress..he decided. No. It was a different reason, something about a long and tiring day. He then spoke the words heard round the world “I don’t look at having a chew on day as a total breakdown, just a stepping stone.” An angry howl was heard in May’s front yard-the summoning call. More vets returned this time, and variations of “stepping stone parables” were heard repeated for the next hour in loud angry rants. We have yet to hear an explanation from Gldean as to why he slipped.
It seemed as through the day had finally calmed down after this event. That was, until Zan walked back door, grumbling about an upcoming nicotine rage event. He grabbed the roll call board off the wall and started waving it wildly in the air “IF YOU ARE ON THE MIA LIST, OR IT IS PAST NOON LOCAL PST, YOU SHOULD FEEL LIKE SHIT!!!” A valid point indeed-we will see what the general consensus is of the May quitters later, when they gather this evening.
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#2
The Days Of Our Quits, episode 2. 2/22/12-2/23/12
It would be a peaceful sight, the May quit house, placed in the KTC desert of quitting, the sun rising on the horizon, lighting up the house with its flag “May 2012” billowing in the wind. Would be peaceful, except for the yelling that was occurring inside. A handful of new members arrived today. One of them, THE Beck had moved past the introductory guest house of the KTC nicotine free community, and into May’s house. Beck walked into the living room area, where the other members had been sitting, and gorging their faces full of any food that lay in sight. Beck was a peculiar individual, and he appeared to be wearing some type of mask, obscuring his face and identity. From behind the mask, he introduced himself, saying that he had been in a Quit House before, but failed and caved. The mask remained seated on his face, and no one could tell who he had been before. This little piece of his introduction caused an abrupt stop in the living room, creating an uncomfortable silence. Only KayakKurt and C Mac continued to stuff their faces full of food. One of the members pulled out a cell phone and rapidly started typing away a message. He put the phone back in his pocket and crossed his arms, turning to look back at Beck. “Bullshit. That is a bullshit introduction”. Suddenly, the door was kicked open. And once again, in came the vets. Loot walked in first, his walking cane ticking on the wood floor as he made is way to the masked man. He brandished the walking stick, poking Beck’s mask with it. In his third person manner of speaking, he informed Beck the mask must come off. The other vets started to yell and stomp their feet, pointing angrily at Beck. Beck couldn’t handle it, he threw his hands over his head and screamed FUCK YOU I’m going to workout and ran from the house.
Later that day, as the members of the May house sat down in the common room area, sharing their various tales and the odd bitching here and there, a JasonB added in to the casual banter. His face bore one of some concern, as he spoke about how his symptoms seemed to be getting worse, instead of better. He also mentioned how he still had an unopened can of cope in his personal cubby in the May quit house. He thought it would be a good way to stick it to US smokeless, and he said he originally bought it just in case he went nuts. Once again, everyone else stopped talking. A few of the members grew red in the face and proceeded to yell at JasonB about what a horrible idea that was. A few people went to the kitchen, threw some bags of popcorn in the microwave, and punched in the timers. A rapping was heard over the yelling at JasonB-Loot was at the door, beating it with his walking stick. He and Bradleyguy, tarpon17, Phalanx, and CoachDoc entered the house-which appeared to have become one of their new favorite places to spend their days in retirement, from wherever they lived in the KTC desert. The vets surrounded JasonB, telling him to listen to his brothers. Loot offered a jab with his wakling cane but was silent this time. JasonB told them he could handle it-he was a runner after all. This caused further uproar, and somehow he managed to squeeze his way out of the crowd, he ran up into his room and slammed the door shut. If you listened closely enough, you could hear a gentle sobbing.
The vets turned to leave, but CoachDoc stayed for a moment. He produced a scroll from his soccer bag. “MAYS MOST WANTED”. He proceeded to read the names off the list, and was interrupted after he called out tylermccoy. “Why the fuck am I on the list” Tyler demanded. Some more may members arrived, stuffing their faces with popcorn as they listened with interest. CoachDoc asked if Tyler wanted a bandaid-he was on the list for bumping others off the roll. Tyler mocked CoachDoc, accepting the offer for the bandaid. Coach dropped a nasty sanitary pad into Tyler’s outstretched hand.
And thatÂ’s all for now, stay tuned for the next episode!
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yesss!
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The Days of Our Quits 2/23/12 Episode 3.
It appears that MayÂ’s attention span, or ability to follow general directions is rather short today. A few newcomers arrived, and attempted to scrawl their names on the large whiteboard hanging in the entryway to the house. This whiteboard contained the sacred roll call list-names of all the members pledging to remain quit that day. In their foggy minds, several people shuffled over to the board, and wrote their names in. While pushing each other to write their names in, someone bumped into the board and rubbed against it, the names of several people and some other text was in instant wiped off the roll call list.
Zam came downstairs after his afternoon nap, and when he got there, he saw a roll call board hanging crooked on the wall, with messy handwriting crawled everywhere, along with some blank spots where some of the names were supposed to be. Zam cursed about the state of the board, loud enough for Xander to hear, who ran down the stairs, glanced at the roll list, and in a dramatic way, fell to his knees, head arched up towards the ceiling, a clenched fist in the air “This roll list has become a DISASTER! Someone help! Noooo!!”. In the midst of this, The Beck was seen slinking through the front door, his black venisian mask still seated on his face. He scribbled his name on the board, and also accidentally wiped a few names off the list “Oops, my..mistake” he muttered. He crept back outside before someone made any comments about his rather late signing of the roll call.
Mcqillisj walked in the door, looked at everyone, and simply muttered “Fuck.” He walked past everyone else and returned to his room. Ltcoffey also came in, from wherever he had been in the desert. Behind him strolled in a Labrador. Coffey turned down and looked at the dog, talking to it as though it was a person. He paused for a minute, as though the dog was responding, and then laughed, talking back in an excited way. He clapped his hands, and ran up the stairs with the dog.
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Figure I'd update my little thread here. I haven't been as active as I would have liked to have been, but I have posted roll every day except 2 days-last saturday, sunday. I had little to no cell service and no internet access, but I guarded my quit.
I had one of my worst days, excluding those first 3 around day 23 or so (on 31 now). I was stuck at work driving around and it felt like the craves were lasting the entire day, I could not get it off my mind, and for the first time in my quit I had to resort to the next step in my plan and use a number which definately helped me out.
The craves have been more infrequent now, but I'm still working on my stress management. My sleep has definately improved though. I haven't been using the SMC near as much. I used the fake stuff once on my bus ride to training last saturday-four of the guys were all packing tins at the same time and about drove me to insanity lol. Before that I hadn't used it for almost a week.
Finals week next week so that'll be another monumental trigger to defeat, but I'll just continue to take it one day at a time.
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I'll be over in July. I'm sorry that I failed all of you.
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Well, I fucked up last night. I went to a party, got blackout drunk, went outside, and I vaguely recall bumming a smoke of some girl. I know I smoked because I cant taste it in my mouth and I reek of the shit. I really fucked up this time. I was too far gone to even process what I was doing, my quit plan was failed past that point. My being drunk was no excuse-I shouldn't have allowed myself to drink that much in the first place.
I apologize to all of you, for taking a shit on this group, and having to repeat this shit all over again. I'll be posting my day 1 over in July. I failed all of you, and I feel like shit for it.
My reason for failure this time was too much alcohol. To fix this issue, I am going to also cut out alcohol as well. I'm a dumbass for drinking too much and I sincerely apologize for my actions-it wasn't worth it.
I can drink small amounts and not be tempted to smoke. Its when I reach the level that I did last night, that I don't even comprehend what I'm doing, and end up bumming a smoke off someone, that my quit is failed. Because of this, the only course of action I see possible to making my quit a successful quit, is cutting alcohol out of the picture at the same time.
I'll be over in July. I'm sorry that I failed all of you.
In each one of you posts after your first cave you said you will NOT cave again.. This is fucking bullshit.. An absolute pussy ass cave story just like the last 2 caves over the last 3 days..
If you haven't get in the group and tell them you have caved.. Expect a barrage of hell, because I'm not the only one who is over the bitch ass caves going on..
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I already did tell the group, check May.
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We can't help you here unless you let us.
Consider Lite if you just want to stop for another few weeks.
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I stopped reading at the end of the first sentence. I am sure it was an awesome narrative. F = Fail. Don't occupy a seat in the life raft if you are not serious about saving your life.
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We can't help you here unless you let us.
Consider Lite if you just want to stop for another few weeks.
Well Tony... I know you had my number.
I also know that many Vets have warned against alcohol during your quit.
You should have known better.
I am very disappointed in you, to the point that I can't even conjure up any rage for you.
You will get enough of it... by the way, a cave like this just belittles us all.
When people quit nuking someone after a series of mistakes, its because they have given up on you.
Don't get to that point... if you haven't already crossed that line.
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What are you doing differently this time?
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This is what I posted over in July-my introduction, and my new quit plan. Please tell me if there are any other ways or additions I could do to improve this plan.
Ok guys, as promised, here is my more detailed introduction. I in no way meant to do an "oops" and just post into the next group. I was trying to post my day 1 as soon as possible to leave no room for slack. I did not use nicotine yesterday, and I do not have any on my person, in my apt, car, etc.
The first time I caved was in 2011. I was in the April 2011 quit group. Around my 40's, I decided I was "cured" and left. I stopped posting roll. I eventually caved in september-I smoked a cigar with some buddies. About 2 weeks later, I had some cigarettes. I stopped for abit. Then, in my weakened mind I thought "hey, dip used to keep me awake, right?" Soon enough, I was back to a can a day habit, shoving dip in my face, thinking it was helping me stay awake during my night shift.
I have alot of work to regain any trust here. I have put some serious work into my quit plan, and for me, its going to involve alot more changes to my lifestyle then previously. I'm in college, 23, and for me, going out to the parties and all on the weekend were a pretty big part of what I did I guess. I'm going to remove the partying as well-that will cut out a major risk of caving, for me.
My quit plan is this:
1. Post roll every day, and if that is not possible, tell the group ahead of time why. Like this week, I'm going on a backpacking trip with my dad for a week. I don't think I'll have cell access where I'm going, but if I did I will text someone that I am quit. My dad is not a tobacco user and knows about my struggle with nicotine.
Otherwise, posting roll every day, first thing in the morning in one of the most important things to do
2. Remind myself why I am quitting-cigarettes, dip, tobacco, nicotine kill. Nicotine also creates a miserable lifestyle-I don't want to be dependant on intaking nicotine every 30 minutes. If I need refreshing of this, I can look at the cancer pictures. I have written this down on a card and put it in my wallet.
3. Keep a set of alternatives around to help defeat craves-sunflower seeds, water, bubblegum, gum, fake dip
4. Get as many numbers as possible. I also have these physically written down and in my wallet-in case I didn't have my phone.
5. Stay active on the forums-this assists me in step 1, and also keeps me distracted from use. I also need to give back to this community, when I've regained trust and is acceptable for me to do so.
6. As noted above, a change in my lifestyle. I need to stop the partying, my workload in school is high enough as it is anyways, and I'm almost done. I also need to lay off the drinking this early in my quit, and later, learn to drink responsibly and avoid putting myself into a situation like last weekend.
7. Print off the contract to give up. Reword where it says "dip" and put in dipping and smoking. Fold up, and carry this with me as well.
Now like I said earlier, I have this issue this week as to how I am going to post roll-I don't think I'll have cell access. This isn't me making shit up, I'll post pictures when I get back, if you all want. I'm going to be way up in northern Idaho. It'll be good for me, being outdoors and away from distraction for a week. I'll text if I get service.
-
This is what I posted over in July-my introduction, and my new quit plan. Please tell me if there are any other ways or additions I could do to improve this plan.
Ok guys, as promised, here is my more detailed introduction. I in no way meant to do an "oops" and just post into the next group. I was trying to post my day 1 as soon as possible to leave no room for slack. I did not use nicotine yesterday, and I do not have any on my person, in my apt, car, etc.
For this group-I was 41 days quit when I caved. I caved because I neglected the advice all the vets continued to post-avoid alcohol during your quit as it lowers your guard. I went to a party, had too much to drink, and wasn't "there" when I smoked-I wasn't even thinking about my quit plan, about the set of numbers I had in my phone, about how far I had made it. I do NOT mean that as an excuse, I mean that as a warning. Get too drunk, and you'll completely forget about your quit plan, and you will cave to nicotine. For me, it was a cigarrette that I vaguely recall smoking. I woke up with a headache, I smelt like nasty smoke, and I knew that I had to start completely over again. For the second time.
The first time I caved was in 2011. I was in the April 2011 quit group. Around my 40's, I decided I was "cured" and left. I stopped posting roll. I eventually caved in september-I smoked a cigar with some buddies. About 2 weeks later, I had some cigarettes. I stopped for abit. Then, in my weakened mind I thought "hey, dip used to keep me awake, right?" Soon enough, I was back to a can a day habit, shoving dip in my face, thinking it was helping me stay awake during my night shift.
I have alot of work to regain any trust here. I have put some serious work into my quit plan, and for me, its going to involve alot more changes to my lifestyle then previously. I'm in college, 23, and for me, going out to the parties and drinking and all on the weekend were a pretty big part of what I did I guess. I've decided its time I, for now, remove the drinking. Later, I can drink-responsibly. Not to blackout drunk like I did last weekend. I'm going to remove the partying as well-that will cut out a major risk of caving, for me.
My quit plan is this:
1. Post roll every day, and if that is not possible, tell the group ahead of time why. Like this week, I'm going on a backpacking trip with my dad for a week. I don't think I'll have cell access where I'm going, but if I did I will text someone that I am quit. My dad is not a tobacco user and knows about my struggle with nicotine.
Otherwise, posting roll every day, first thing in the morning in one of the most important things to do
2. Remind myself why I am quitting-cigarettes, dip, tobacco, nicotine kill. Nicotine also creates a miserable lifestyle-I don't want to be dependant on intaking nicotine every 30 minutes. If I need refreshing of this, I can look at the cancer pictures. I have written this down on a card and put it in my wallet.
3. Keep a set of alternatives around to help defeat craves-sunflower seeds, water, bubblegum, gum, fake dip
4. Get as many numbers as possible. I also have these physically written down and in my wallet-in case I didn't have my phone.
5. Stay active on the forums-this assists me in step 1, and also keeps me distracted from use. I also need to give back to this community, when I've regained trust and is acceptable for me to do so.
6. As noted above, a change in my lifestyle. I need to stop the partying, my workload in school is high enough as it is anyways, and I'm almost done. I also need to lay off the drinking this early in my quit, and later, learn to drink responsibly and avoid putting myself into a situation like last weekend.
7. Print off the contract to give up. Reword where it says "dip" and put in dipping and smoking. Fold up, and carry this with me as well.
Now like I said earlier, I have this issue this week as to how I am going to post roll-I don't think I'll have cell access. This isn't me making shit up, I'll post pictures when I get back, if you all want. I'm going to be way up in northern Idaho. It'll be good for me, being outdoors and away from distraction for a week. I'll text if I get service.
Way to come back with a reasonable plan. I'll be honest, I don't know if you have what it takes to quit or not. If I were still 23 I'm not sure I would have it either. But at 51 I have a crystal clear idea what being quit is about. You have to want it and believe it. I wish you the best in pursuing your quit. PM me if you need numbers.
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Hi Tony
Not sure if you will get this prior to your trip but here is one thing that may ( or may not help you stay quit). You are going to Northern Idaho. Most likely not very far from where you are hiking is a line and across this line is a magical place where people speak funny, the money is different colors and a tin of dip is $22.00. No that is not a typo $22.00 per can of poison. Now I am not sure how much it is where you live but up here a can a day habit would be $660 a month or $7,920 per year. To let you know for the year ending December 31 2011 - based on my usage I figure I wasted around $900 on something that can and most likely will kill me. I have been dipping for 20 years so my conservative estimate is that I wasted somewhere in the neigbourhood of $30,000 to $40,000. If I came up to you today and said give me 40,000 and I will give you something that may kill you, you would punch me in the head and tell me to fuck off.
So Tony, take it from one of your northern brothers who is just now getting smart- quit now and buy a sports car
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This is what I posted over in July-my introduction, and my new quit plan. Please tell me if there are any other ways or additions I could do to improve this plan.
Ok guys, as promised, here is my more detailed introduction. I in no way meant to do an "oops" and just post into the next group. I was trying to post my day 1 as soon as possible to leave no room for slack. I did not use nicotine yesterday, and I do not have any on my person, in my apt, car, etc.
For this group-I was 41 days quit when I caved. I caved because I neglected the advice all the vets continued to post-avoid alcohol during your quit as it lowers your guard. I went to a party, had too much to drink, and wasn't "there" when I smoked-I wasn't even thinking about my quit plan, about the set of numbers I had in my phone, about how far I had made it. I do NOT mean that as an excuse, I mean that as a warning. Get too drunk, and you'll completely forget about your quit plan, and you will cave to nicotine. For me, it was a cigarrette that I vaguely recall smoking. I woke up with a headache, I smelt like nasty smoke, and I knew that I had to start completely over again. For the second time.
The first time I caved was in 2011. I was in the April 2011 quit group. Around my 40's, I decided I was "cured" and left. I stopped posting roll. I eventually caved in september-I smoked a cigar with some buddies. About 2 weeks later, I had some cigarettes. I stopped for abit. Then, in my weakened mind I thought "hey, dip used to keep me awake, right?" Soon enough, I was back to a can a day habit, shoving dip in my face, thinking it was helping me stay awake during my night shift.
I have alot of work to regain any trust here. I have put some serious work into my quit plan, and for me, its going to involve alot more changes to my lifestyle then previously. I'm in college, 23, and for me, going out to the parties and drinking and all on the weekend were a pretty big part of what I did I guess. I've decided its time I, for now, remove the drinking. Later, I can drink-responsibly. Not to blackout drunk like I did last weekend. I'm going to remove the partying as well-that will cut out a major risk of caving, for me.
My quit plan is this:
1. Post roll every day, and if that is not possible, tell the group ahead of time why. Like this week, I'm going on a backpacking trip with my dad for a week. I don't think I'll have cell access where I'm going, but if I did I will text someone that I am quit. My dad is not a tobacco user and knows about my struggle with nicotine.
Otherwise, posting roll every day, first thing in the morning in one of the most important things to do
2. Remind myself why I am quitting-cigarettes, dip, tobacco, nicotine kill. Nicotine also creates a miserable lifestyle-I don't want to be dependant on intaking nicotine every 30 minutes. If I need refreshing of this, I can look at the cancer pictures. I have written this down on a card and put it in my wallet.
3. Keep a set of alternatives around to help defeat craves-sunflower seeds, water, bubblegum, gum, fake dip
4. Get as many numbers as possible. I also have these physically written down and in my wallet-in case I didn't have my phone.
5. Stay active on the forums-this assists me in step 1, and also keeps me distracted from use. I also need to give back to this community, when I've regained trust and is acceptable for me to do so.
6. As noted above, a change in my lifestyle. I need to stop the partying, my workload in school is high enough as it is anyways, and I'm almost done. I also need to lay off the drinking this early in my quit, and later, learn to drink responsibly and avoid putting myself into a situation like last weekend.
7. Print off the contract to give up. Reword where it says "dip" and put in dipping and smoking. Fold up, and carry this with me as well.
Now like I said earlier, I have this issue this week as to how I am going to post roll-I don't think I'll have cell access. This isn't me making shit up, I'll post pictures when I get back, if you all want. I'm going to be way up in northern Idaho. It'll be good for me, being outdoors and away from distraction for a week. I'll text if I get service.
Way to come back with a reasonable plan. I'll be honest, I don't know if you have what it takes to quit or not. If I were still 23 I'm not sure I would have it either. But at 51 I have a crystal clear idea what being quit is about. You have to want it and believe it. I wish you the best in pursuing your quit. PM me if you need numbers.
Good work, Tony. Now, quit F-ing around, no more excuses. The alcohol didn't do shit, you made a conscious decision.
Also, eliminate the word "cave" from your vocabulary. You can choose one of two paths:
Choose Death --or -- Stay Quit
Think of those two alternatives the next time you're confronted with that choice. And, of course, stop putting yourself into situations where that choice confronts you, dude.
One final thing: get pissed. At your age, if you can't stay angry at tobacco and what it does, you're going to have a hard time staying quit. Don't worry, if you Choose Death and waste 10-20 more years sucking down tobacco, you'll eventually get pissed like the rest of us.
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the best part is when you get really wasted and kill yourself or someone else!!!
-
This is what I posted over in July-my introduction, and my new quit plan. Please tell me if there are any other ways or additions I could do to improve this plan.
Ok guys, as promised, here is my more detailed introduction. I in no way meant to do an "oops" and just post into the next group. I was trying to post my day 1 as soon as possible to leave no room for slack. I did not use nicotine yesterday, and I do not have any on my person, in my apt, car, etc.
For this group-I was 41 days quit when I caved. I caved because I neglected the advice all the vets continued to post-avoid alcohol during your quit as it lowers your guard. I went to a party, had too much to drink, and wasn't "there" when I smoked-I wasn't even thinking about my quit plan, about the set of numbers I had in my phone, about how far I had made it. I do NOT mean that as an excuse, I mean that as a warning. Get too drunk, and you'll completely forget about your quit plan, and you will cave to nicotine. For me, it was a cigarrette that I vaguely recall smoking. I woke up with a headache, I smelt like nasty smoke, and I knew that I had to start completely over again. For the second time.
The first time I caved was in 2011. I was in the April 2011 quit group. Around my 40's, I decided I was "cured" and left. I stopped posting roll. I eventually caved in september-I smoked a cigar with some buddies. About 2 weeks later, I had some cigarettes. I stopped for abit. Then, in my weakened mind I thought "hey, dip used to keep me awake, right?" Soon enough, I was back to a can a day habit, shoving dip in my face, thinking it was helping me stay awake during my night shift.
I have alot of work to regain any trust here. I have put some serious work into my quit plan, and for me, its going to involve alot more changes to my lifestyle then previously. I'm in college, 23, and for me, going out to the parties and drinking and all on the weekend were a pretty big part of what I did I guess. I've decided its time I, for now, remove the drinking. Later, I can drink-responsibly. Not to blackout drunk like I did last weekend. I'm going to remove the partying as well-that will cut out a major risk of caving, for me.
My quit plan is this:
1. Post roll every day, and if that is not possible, tell the group ahead of time why. Like this week, I'm going on a backpacking trip with my dad for a week. I don't think I'll have cell access where I'm going, but if I did I will text someone that I am quit. My dad is not a tobacco user and knows about my struggle with nicotine.
Otherwise, posting roll every day, first thing in the morning in one of the most important things to do
2. Remind myself why I am quitting-cigarettes, dip, tobacco, nicotine kill. Nicotine also creates a miserable lifestyle-I don't want to be dependant on intaking nicotine every 30 minutes. If I need refreshing of this, I can look at the cancer pictures. I have written this down on a card and put it in my wallet.
3. Keep a set of alternatives around to help defeat craves-sunflower seeds, water, bubblegum, gum, fake dip
4. Get as many numbers as possible. I also have these physically written down and in my wallet-in case I didn't have my phone.
5. Stay active on the forums-this assists me in step 1, and also keeps me distracted from use. I also need to give back to this community, when I've regained trust and is acceptable for me to do so.
6. As noted above, a change in my lifestyle. I need to stop the partying, my workload in school is high enough as it is anyways, and I'm almost done. I also need to lay off the drinking this early in my quit, and later, learn to drink responsibly and avoid putting myself into a situation like last weekend.
7. Print off the contract to give up. Reword where it says "dip" and put in dipping and smoking. Fold up, and carry this with me as well.
Now like I said earlier, I have this issue this week as to how I am going to post roll-I don't think I'll have cell access. This isn't me making shit up, I'll post pictures when I get back, if you all want. I'm going to be way up in northern Idaho. It'll be good for me, being outdoors and away from distraction for a week. I'll text if I get service.
Way to come back with a reasonable plan. I'll be honest, I don't know if you have what it takes to quit or not. If I were still 23 I'm not sure I would have it either. But at 51 I have a crystal clear idea what being quit is about. You have to want it and believe it. I wish you the best in pursuing your quit. PM me if you need numbers.
Good work, Tony. Now, quit F-ing around, no more excuses. The alcohol didn't do shit, you made a conscious decision.
Also, eliminate the word "cave" from your vocabulary. You can choose one of two paths:
Choose Death --or -- Stay Quit
Think of those two alternatives the next time you're confronted with that choice. And, of course, stop putting yourself into situations where that choice confronts you, dude.
One final thing: get pissed. At your age, if you can't stay angry at tobacco and what it does, you're going to have a hard time staying quit. Don't worry, if you Choose Death and waste 10-20 more years sucking down tobacco, you'll eventually get pissed like the rest of us.
Tony,
When i Pmd you the other day and said I was glad to see you back. I meant being active on the site. Not, letting your guard down, caving, and then posting in a new group. You got 3 of us old fucks fired up (yes rgross and tonyselle, you two. I don't know wowee). I don't know what lies your addict brain tells you after 6 weeks of quit, but you need to figure that out so you can avoid it this time. 2x is enough. Im not trying to pile on, I'm just worried that you don't have what it takes.
Vadge
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Thanks for the advice.
Rgross-i am pissed at tobacco. I'm convinced the only reason its legal, is either because of the huge tax revenue it pulls in, or as some sort of pop control device.
Vadge I have what it takes. I just need to fully embrace the quit this time and make those life changes. Please don't discriminate my efforts at this because I'm a younger guy.
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Also, trip to northern Idaho got cancelled due to weather, so cell access isn't an issue now.
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So I figured I'd post an update to this. I'm on day 24 now, and I've been following through with the updates to my quit plan. The main component of that plan was a "change in lifestyle" by not going to the parties. I've kept to that. I haven't gone to a single one since my fuckup, 24 days ago. I have had one, or two beers on occasion, but in my apartment, and not out with the crowd of party friends I used to hang out with. I've distanced myself from that group, and have instead focused my time further more into school and finding employment-which payed off. Last week I was called and hired for a IT position-one I didn't think I'd be able to attain until after I had completed my education, and gotten some certifications.
I now have another reason, to add to the list of reasons for staying quit-and that is tobacco is prohibited at this new place of employment-I worked too hard getting this job to risk losing it to something as worthless as a dip. I will also be far more effective with a clear mind, and possess more patience (which is also very important for this line of work) then what a nicotine addicted individual would have. One less thing to worry about. Additionally, I'm sure I would have had a much harder time focusing at the interview or during the skills testing with my mind focusing on when I had last dipped.
I'm only on day 24, and I still feel the craves, but I am staying strong and I think have achieved a major turn around by distancing myself from people who were negative influences.
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bump
100 and the HOF Congrats!
now stick with it long term....commit to 200.....1 day at a time...
posting your daily promise works, do not fade away as so many others have done before you!
now is not the time for complacency!
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bump
100 and the HOF Congrats!
now stick with it long term....commit to 200.....1 day at a time...
posting your daily promise works, do not fade away as so many others have done before you!
now is not the time for complacency!
:)
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bump
100 and the HOF Congrats!
now stick with it long term....commit to 200.....1 day at a time...
posting your daily promise works, do not fade away as so many others have done before you!
now is not the time for complacency!
:)
Excellent advice. Post EVERY day.. why quit what has worked so far?
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the best part is when you get really wasted and kill yourself or someone else!!!
True that!
My uncle flipped a truck on my dad's head and killed him instantly. He scraped his elbow but crushed my dads head open. When the cops came to the accident, he was so distraught that he was trying to give him CPR. (that was no accident...that was a crime scene!!!)
Getting wasted and being an addict is so cool! Especially when you are still accountable to your choices and actions. Never forget that when you think you are, "off the record" you are still on the record.
We all make choices and live with the consequences. Some choices bare fruits of success. Like making a promise and posting roll. Other choices bare fruits of failure like drinking yourself to not care about your promise. Next thing you know, you are dipping! You still own that choice.
So sick of addicts blaming their failure on things like, "I drank too much". Own your addiction and control it by being accountable to protect your quit.
Getting wasted on alcohol, prescription drugs etc is another form of addiction. Wake up!
Get addicted to winning and tasting success. Do good, be honorable and live a life that you don't have to make excuses for. Live a life that you can hold your head up with confidence and peace.
If you find peace and happiness with yourself, getting shitfaced and wasted....There just isn't any point to it. You wont need an escape because you like yourself.
Start liking yourself by working and being who you know you can and want to be. I highly doubt any of us as kids ever dreamed about growing up to be addicted to nicotine or alcohol. Yet some of us live for the weekend to solely get our drink on???
We got side tracked, now it is time to got to work and get back on course...no matter what our age.
Maybe I am raging here but my hell. All of this may be hard to do, but the concept is simple and the burden to abstain is so much lighter than the consequences of damning addictions!
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I have this hanging on my wall in my office.
"So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide.
Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and grovel to none.
When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and no thing, for abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision.
When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home."
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I have this hanging on my wall in my office.
"So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide.
Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and grovel to none.
When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and no thing, for abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision.
When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home."
Wow that is good. Where did you get it? I think I would like to put that in my office as well.
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Bro, take it from me, it ain't easy to come back.
Fact is, you are back, but you want to make sure you've got your head around whatever it is that you're going to do differently this time.
It could be that you simply want to quit more now than you did before, and that, in and of itself, may be enough to get you through.
My hope is that you go all Genghis on it this time, bro.
I'm rooting for you.
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My quit plan is this:
1. Post roll every day, and if that is not possible, tell the group ahead of time why. Like this week, I'm going on a backpacking trip with my dad for a week. I don't think I'll have cell access where I'm going, but if I did I will text someone that I am quit. My dad is not a tobacco user and knows about my struggle with nicotine.
Otherwise, posting roll every day, first thing in the morning in one of the most important things to do
I'm calling you out. You've been pretty good, but you have missed roll for more than 1 day in a row a few times. And if I remember correctly, you got snippy with another July member when they checked up on you about it.
You missed yesterday (I think), but I see roll this morning. So are you going to live up to your quit plan? Or fade away after the HOF tomorrow?
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I have this hanging on my wall in my office.
"So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide.
Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and grovel to none.
When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and no thing, for abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision.
When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home."
Wow that is good. Where did you get it? I think I would like to put that in my office as well.
It is a Speech given by Tecumseh. Pretty easy to find on the internet.
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100 days ago I doubted you had what it takes to stay quit. I doubted your sincerity based on your age and history. Tony, I am proud as fuck that you proved me wrong. Don't let up now. Quitting still requires guts and nuts. Remind yourself everyday.
Vadge
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100 days ago I doubted you had what it takes to stay quit. I doubted your sincerity based on your age and history. Tony, I am proud as fuck that you proved me wrong. Don't let up now. Quitting still requires guts and nuts. Remind yourself everyday.
Vadge
Exact same story for me, Tony. I didn't think you could stay quit for the same reasons Vadge lists. Nice job, keep it up and keep proving us wrong!
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As I posted in my group, I failed. I had hookah tonight with friends, and left the nicotine free quitting. I dont have any specific "who, what, when, where, why" other then that I fucked up. I had a bowl of shisha, which has nicotine in it. I appreciate the support with the assistance in quitting the dip, but I dont feel right posting after having ingested something with nicotine in it.
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As I posted in my group, I failed. I had hookah tonight with friends, and left the nicotine free quitting. I dont have any specific "who, what, when, where, why" other then that I fucked up. I had a bowl of shisha, which has nicotine in it. I appreciate the support with the assistance in quitting the dip, but I dont feel right posting after having ingested something with nicotine in it.
I had no idea what the hell hookah shisha was.. "googled".. Looks to me like that is just a very expensive way to get a nic fix. Are you a dipper or a smoker - both? A nic addiction is a nic addiction I suppose.. I have no desire to hit a hookah..unless you could put a fat ass BUD in there or something! Just kidding been sober since 2003 as well.. still looked like a BFB if you ask me? (big fucking bong)... I don't really blast others for caving here and I have taken some shit for it.. I support you in your quit.. Don't give up and keep coming back! Gooch
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Also...where the fuck is live chat? I tried to jump in there earlier tonight, before I caved...its timing out?
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Also...where the fuck is live chat? I tried to jump in there earlier tonight, before I caved...its timing out?
Tony,
Dude it really sucks you gave in to a damn hookah but you know what you got to do now. Pick yourself off the damn floor, crawl your ass back in here and start posting roll again. Don't give in again man, it's not worth it.
Kstamp
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Also...where the fuck is live chat? I tried to jump in there earlier tonight, before I caved...its timing out?
Tony,
Dude it really sucks you gave in to a damn hookah but you know what you got to do now. Pick yourself off the damn floor, crawl your ass back in here and start posting roll again. Don't give in again man, it's not worth it.
Kstamp
poof
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100 days ago I doubted you had what it takes to stay quit. I doubted your sincerity based on your age and history. Tony, I am proud as fuck that you proved me wrong. Don't let up now. Quitting still requires guts and nuts. Remind yourself everyday.Â
Vadge
Exact same story for me, Tony. I didn't think you could stay quit for the same reasons Vadge lists. Nice job, keep it up and keep proving us wrong!
Damn it, I hate when I'm proven right. Dude, I have no idea why you want to keep restarting your quit, but obviously deep down you do not take this as life or death. Hookas? Wasn't it cigars last time? I wish you the best, but multi-time cavers don't get my respect or support...
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Tony,
You have been spotty on roll. While you might think this was just an accident or whatever, I think you've been planning it for a while. Maybe not up front in your mind, but subconsciously, just like the cave before you joined our group way back in March. Figure it out man.
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Also, I had a black and mild around day 92 or so. I'm sorry I didn't say anything...I fucked up..
Don't know if you will see this, because you are "out" but if you smoked a black and mild on day92 and continued to post days , I AM GLAD YOU ARE OUT. Caving is forgivable and fixable,preventable. Lying to the people on this site is a character flaw that can't be repaired and I dont' have time for that and don't deserve it and no one on this site does.
Good Luck with your life
So you posted roll for 55 days after having a cigar? That's pretty pathetic.
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Also, I had a black and mild around day 92 or so. I'm sorry I didn't say anything...I fucked up..
Don't know if you will see this, because you are "out" but if you smoked a black and mild on day92 and continued to post days , I AM GLAD YOU ARE OUT. Caving is forgivable and fixable,preventable. Lying to the people on this site is a character flaw that can't be repaired and I dont' have time for that and don't deserve it and no one on this site does.
Good Luck with your life
So you posted roll for 55 days after having a cigar? That's pretty pathetic.
WTF!! Can't blame chat! I was up all fucking night bored and craving like a son of a bitch! I didn't cave I pushed through the whole night! I have worked 120 hours so far this week, the whole week has been filled with with craving after craving after craving. Again I didn't Cave! I posted roll every day I you took time to mail you numbers. You have the numbers of every person in July that would give numbers out. No excuses I just can't accept it right now!! The lie I cact forgive sorry!
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I dont think I asked for forgivness in my "confession". I smoked hookah with some friends, and fucked up. Thats really all there is to it.
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I dont think I asked for forgivness in my "confession". I smoked hookah with some friends, and fucked up. Thats really all there is to it.
Tony,
I'm done with you dude. Flat out done. This is your 3rd such fuck up and I for one am not wasting anymore time on your lackluster efforts at quitting. You knew what you were doing and that is shameful and disrespectful to those on KTC that are fighting everyday to stay quit against all odds. Please don't waste another groups's time and effort. You need to just go away until you can actually take this seriously. As of right now, I just don't think you're capable of doing that nor are you capable of appreciating the importance of removing nicotine from your life.
Coach
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I dont think I asked for forgivness in my "confession". I smoked hookah with some friends, and fucked up. Thats really all there is to it.
Tony,
I'm done with you dude. Flat out done. This is your 3rd such fuck up and I for one am not wasting anymore time on your lackluster efforts at quitting. You knew what you were doing and that is shameful and disrespectful to those on KTC that are fighting everyday to stay quit against all odds. Please don't waste another groups's time and effort. You need to just go away until you can actually take this seriously. As of right now, I just don't think you're capable of doing that nor are you capable of appreciating the importance of removing nicotine from your life.
Coach
Let the shit pounding begin! Please, will all the "vets" please come forward? Its so lonely without all of you.
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100 days ago I doubted you had what it takes to stay quit. I doubted your sincerity based on your age and history. Tony, I am proud as fuck that you proved me wrong. Don't let up now. Quitting still requires guts and nuts. Remind yourself everyday.Â
Vadge
Exact same story for me, Tony. I didn't think you could stay quit for the same reasons Vadge lists. Nice job, keep it up and keep proving us wrong!
Damn it, I hate when I'm proven right. Dude, I have no idea why you want to keep restarting your quit, but obviously deep down you do not take this as life or death. Hookas? Wasn't it cigars last time? I wish you the best, but multi-time cavers don't get my respect or support...
Thanks for the advice.
Rgross-i am pissed at tobacco. I'm convinced the only reason its legal, is either because of the huge tax revenue it pulls in, or as some sort of pop control device.
Vadge I have what it takes. I just need to fully embrace the quit this time and make those life changes. Please don't discriminate my efforts at this because I'm a younger guy.
Hey at least you made it past the 6 week mark this time 'cs'
You had my number. Although you did tell me your quit was "good" 3 weeks ago when I texted you and posted for you. 'cs'
Enjoy your nicotine liar. 'cs'
Vadge 218.
I have decided to keep my promise today.
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I'm cancelling my account. Fuck this shit. I dont need to owe up to a bach full of internet pusses. I had a bowl of hookah. Boohoo! The world has ended. And for your IP logs-how does Europe feel? Baaaaaah
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I'm cancelling my account. Fuck this shit. I dont need to owe up to a bach full of internet pusses. I had a bowl of hookah. Boohoo! The world has ended. And for your IP logs-how does Europe feel? Baaaaaah
You are right you don't need to own up to us Internet "pussies" as you say. At least not anymore.... You only need to answer to yourself. When you look in the mirror everyday you will still be a slave to fucking nicotine. But me I will not because I had the balls to give up the shit. So go ahead and delete your account and run away like a "Pussy". Don't expect a happy welcome when you find yourself crawling back in here.
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I'm cancelling my account. Fuck this shit. I dont need to owe up to a bach full of internet pusses. I had a bowl of hookah. Boohoo! The world has ended. And for your IP logs-how does Europe feel? Baaaaaah
Your a silly little excuse for a man. You can dodge our accountability yes. But can you dodge your own? For many of us this isn't a game, the stakes are real and they are literally our lives. Smoking a bowl of hookah may not seem like a big deal , but for some of us who know the pain of decades of addiction it is huge. It represents falling back into a trap that could very well kill us, rip us from our freedom and steal us from our families. When you casually dismiss it you fail to see that your cave makes all of us wonder, if just for a second, what it would be like to use again. Your bowl of hookah is like opening a crack in the door. So fuck you. I don't want that door opened, and neither do the rest of us. If you wanna suck on a some flavored lung cancer, go do it somewhere else. You can change your name, change your ip or even your story, but it's harder to change your character . Right now, your showing a lack of respect for those that supported you, a lack of resolve , a lack of respect for yourself, and have demonstrated a total lack of personal integrity. In short,fuck you,you caving little 6 year old worm licker. I wouldn't trust you to feed my goldfish let alone keep your word . We don't need you here, this is a QUIT SITE and you my trolling little douchetard are no quitter, so GTFO
SM day 1300 and that feels fucking good. YOU, can't have that without earning it. Baaaaaah right back bitch
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I'm cancelling my account. Fuck this shit. I dont need to owe up to a bach full of internet pusses. I had a bowl of hookah. Boohoo! The world has ended. And for your IP logs-how does Europe feel? Baaaaaah
Your a silly little excuse for a man. You can dodge our accountability yes. But can you dodge your own? For many of us this isn't a game, the stakes are real and they are literally our lives. Smoking a bowl of hookah may not seem like a big deal , but for some of us who know the pain of decades of addiction it is huge. It represents falling back into a trap that could very well kill us, rip us from our freedom and steal us from our families. When you casually dismiss it you fail to see that your cave makes all of us wonder, if just for a second, what it would be like to use again. Your bowl of hookah is like opening a crack in the door. So fuck you. I don't want that door opened, and neither do the rest of us. If you wanna suck on a some flavored lung cancer, go do it somewhere else. You can change your name, change your ip or even your story, but it's harder to change your character . Right now, your showing a lack of respect for those that supported you, a lack of resolve , a lack of respect for yourself, and have demonstrated a total lack of personal integrity. In short,fuck you,you caving little 6 year old worm licker. I wouldn't trust you to feed my goldfish let alone keep your word . We don't need you here, this is a QUIT SITE and you my trolling little douchetard are no quitter, so GTFO
SM day 1300 and that feels fucking good. YOU, can't have that without earning it. Baaaaaah right back bitch
Tony, you are a child. I feel like some old fogey phasing it that way, but there is no real better way. You are a child. Come back when you grow up. Until then, there is no reason to be here.
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I'm cancelling my account. Fuck this shit. I dont need to owe up to a bach full of internet pusses. I had a bowl of hookah. Boohoo! The world has ended. And for your IP logs-how does Europe feel? Baaaaaah
Your a silly little excuse for a man. You can dodge our accountability yes. But can you dodge your own? For many of us this isn't a game, the stakes are real and they are literally our lives. Smoking a bowl of hookah may not seem like a big deal , but for some of us who know the pain of decades of addiction it is huge. It represents falling back into a trap that could very well kill us, rip us from our freedom and steal us from our families. When you casually dismiss it you fail to see that your cave makes all of us wonder, if just for a second, what it would be like to use again. Your bowl of hookah is like opening a crack in the door. So fuck you. I don't want that door opened, and neither do the rest of us. If you wanna suck on a some flavored lung cancer, go do it somewhere else. You can change your name, change your ip or even your story, but it's harder to change your character . Right now, your showing a lack of respect for those that supported you, a lack of resolve , a lack of respect for yourself, and have demonstrated a total lack of personal integrity. In short,fuck you,you caving little 6 year old worm licker. I wouldn't trust you to feed my goldfish let alone keep your word . We don't need you here, this is a QUIT SITE and you my trolling little douchetard are no quitter, so GTFO
SM day 1300 and that feels fucking good. YOU, can't have that without earning it. Baaaaaah right back bitch
Tony, you are a child. I feel like some old fogey phasing it that way, but there is no real better way. You are a child. Come back when you grow up. Until then, there is no reason to be here.
Damn Zam. I'll even call him a child. I'm only two years older than him, and I've stirred up shit, thrown a tantrum or two, and I'm a retread myself. But I like to think that I owned it when I failed. I took it seriously. I decided to do it different. I'm in here every day. Hell I'm in here most of every day. And this "Let the shit pounding begin!" bullshit really chaps my little, white ass.
Tony, they're pounding you for being a pussy. (And everyone likes pounding pussies, but I digress.) They're pounding you for slinking back in here, not being sorry for shitting on the entire site, and then making a mockery of it. They're pounding you for being a little bitch whose word doesn't mean shit. 55 days. FIFTY-MOTHER-ASSBAG-NEEDLEDICK-FUCKING-FIVE DAYS!!! And then you're not even sorry?
I would like you to do me a favor. Go find a fence. One with the spikes on top. Climb up it. Slide down with one leg on each side. Let that spike slide right up your sorry, weak, little vagina, and get fucked. (Disclaimer: There are some kick-ass quitters on this site with vaginas. However, in the figurative sense, you ladies have some big cajones.) Now, maybe, hopefully, you'll enjoy that fence. It'll hit your G-spot and make you squeal like a little piggy. And maybe that will cheer you up enough that you'll change your attitude and get with the goddamn program. Or maybe, you just piss off and get fucked. Your choice.
I needed a reason to let that out. Thanks
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Alright so I made a jackass of myself in here. Incidentally, my old account I managed to screw somehow to get it stuck into a never ending validation cycle, or I was suspended, I'm not sure which. In any case I wont be returning until I can take this shit seriously enough to quit fucking around with everyone elses quit.
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Alright so I made a jackass of myself in here. Incidentally, my old account I managed to screw somehow to get it stuck into a never ending validation cycle, or I was suspended, I'm not sure which. In any case I wont be returning until I can take this shit seriously enough to quit fucking around with everyone elses quit.
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Please wake up before it's to late! Read Captian's update on Randy! This is serious shit we are dealing with, a matter of life and death! If you want to continue playing Russian roulette remember you are going to be fully loaded very soon!
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Alright so I made a jackass of myself in here. Incidentally, my old account I managed to screw somehow to get it stuck into a never ending validation cycle, or I was suspended, I'm not sure which. In any case I wont be returning until I can take this shit seriously enough to quit fucking around with everyone elses quit.
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Please wake up before it's to late! Read Captian's update on Randy! This is serious shit we are dealing with, a matter of life and death! If you want to continue playing Russian roulette remember you are going to be fully loaded very soon!
Hey - I need to give a different perspective.
Yes this is very serious shit that we are dealing with, therefore it is something that should grab your attention and you should repect it for yourself, and whether you do or not, is your issue.
BUT
When you come on here and display the cave, that you have done, in the way that you have, that to me shows that you are not taking it seriously in PUBLIC, and therefore it becomes the issue of your quit brothers here and all others that are struggling here on this site to seriously kick this habit and get control of our addiction.
So as others have said, for the sake of the many take this serious and quit, or please do not disrespect what the rest of of are here accomplishing each day.
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For many of us this isn't a game, the stakes are real and they are literally our lives. Smoking a bowl of hookah may not seem like a big deal , but for some of us who know the pain of decades of addiction it is huge. It represents falling back into a trap that could very well kill us, rip us from our freedom and steal us from our families. When you casually dismiss it you fail to see that your cave makes all of us wonder, if just for a second, what it would be like to use again.
Very well put and needed to be said. Caves hurt us all and I've got shit-ton of stuff riding on this quit. A shit-ton. Everything.
Bye Tony. I won't miss you.
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Alright so I made a jackass of myself in here. Incidentally, my old account I managed to screw somehow to get it stuck into a never ending validation cycle, or I was suspended, I'm not sure which. In any case I wont be returning until I can take this shit seriously enough to quit fucking around with everyone elses quit.
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Please wake up before it's to late! Read Captian's update on Randy! This is serious shit we are dealing with, a matter of life and death! If you want to continue playing Russian roulette remember you are going to be fully loaded very soon!
Hey - I need to give a different perspective.
Yes this is very serious shit that we are dealing with, therefore it is something that should grab your attention and you should repect it for yourself, and whether you do or not, is your issue.
BUT
When you come on here and display the cave, that you have done, in the way that you have, that to me shows that you are not taking it seriously in PUBLIC, and therefore it becomes the issue of your quit brothers here and all others that are struggling here on this site to seriously kick this habit and get control of our addiction.
So as others have said, for the sake of the many take this serious and quit, or please do not disrespect what the rest of of are here accomplishing each day.
Too late boys. This is at least a 3rd cave... Dude even made it 100 days last time. He can respond to peer pressure for just so long, and lacks the maturity to keep his word to himself first. I hope he grows up some, becomes accountable to himself, then gets on with a quit...
Just sad how little some of these people put into staying quit 'finger point'
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Alright so I made a jackass of myself in here. Incidentally, my old account I managed to screw somehow to get it stuck into a never ending validation cycle, or I was suspended, I'm not sure which. In any case I wont be returning until I can take this shit seriously enough to quit fucking around with everyone elses quit.
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Please wake up before it's to late! Read Captian's update on Randy! This is serious shit we are dealing with, a matter of life and death! If you want to continue playing Russian roulette remember you are going to be fully loaded very soon!
Hey - I need to give a different perspective.
Yes this is very serious shit that we are dealing with, therefore it is something that should grab your attention and you should repect it for yourself, and whether you do or not, is your issue.
BUT
When you come on here and display the cave, that you have done, in the way that you have, that to me shows that you are not taking it seriously in PUBLIC, and therefore it becomes the issue of your quit brothers here and all others that are struggling here on this site to seriously kick this habit and get control of our addiction.
So as others have said, for the sake of the many take this serious and quit, or please do not disrespect what the rest of of are here accomplishing each day.
Too late boys. This is at least a 3rd cave... Dude even made it 100 days last time. He can respond to peer pressure for just so long, and lacks the maturity to keep his word to himself first. I hope he grows up some, becomes accountable to himself, then gets on with a quit...
Just sad how little some of these people put into staying quit 'finger point'
Don't take a seat in the lifeboat if you are not serious about saving your life.
-
Alright so I made a jackass of myself in here. Incidentally, my old account I managed to screw somehow to get it stuck into a never ending validation cycle, or I was suspended, I'm not sure which. In any case I wont be returning until I can take this shit seriously enough to quit fucking around with everyone elses quit.
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Please wake up before it's to late! Read Captian's update on Randy! This is serious shit we are dealing with, a matter of life and death! If you want to continue playing Russian roulette remember you are going to be fully loaded very soon!
Hey - I need to give a different perspective.
Yes this is very serious shit that we are dealing with, therefore it is something that should grab your attention and you should repect it for yourself, and whether you do or not, is your issue.
BUT
When you come on here and display the cave, that you have done, in the way that you have, that to me shows that you are not taking it seriously in PUBLIC, and therefore it becomes the issue of your quit brothers here and all others that are struggling here on this site to seriously kick this habit and get control of our addiction.
So as others have said, for the sake of the many take this serious and quit, or please do not disrespect what the rest of of are here accomplishing each day.
Too late boys. This is at least a 3rd cave... Dude even made it 100 days last time. He can respond to peer pressure for just so long, and lacks the maturity to keep his word to himself first. I hope he grows up some, becomes accountable to himself, then gets on with a quit...
Just sad how little some of these people put into staying quit 'finger point'
Don't take a seat in the lifeboat if you are not serious about saving your life.
Fuck off, 3rd time failure? Really? You ought to get the death penalty for attempted homicide for the 3rd time. I guess a life of parole reporting to the Nic bitch will kill you regardless.
Nice job fucktard!