KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: andrew on January 12, 2011, 01:29:00 AM
-
So I just posted on the roll call yesterday for the first time, the last time I had a dip was on the 3rd of January.
I want to say thanks to the makers of this site, you actually inspired me to quit completely.
My name is Andrew, I'm in the US Army and I'm currently deployed overseas (so if I post at weird times, I'm sorry). I was always a straight shooter kid through high school, but my addiction to nicotine started about 6 years ago when I was bored and decided I wanted to smoke my buddy's cigarette. That first cigarette led to a chain smoking addiction for two years, I was smoking a pack a day, sometimes more. When I was deployed to Iraq shortly after that I wasn't able to smoke all the time, so I started dipping instead. I was dipping around a can a day, sometimes less, sometimes more. It was hard to keep track, because I would wake up and dip a certain flavor, put it away, dip something else....I had open dip cans and spitters all around my room.
I came back to the states after that deployment and was dipping nonstop. My other half was not happy about that one. At least with smoking I didn't leave spitters or empty dip cans around the house, and I wasn't always sitting around with our friends looking like a moron with a face tumor. I really didn't care.
It was getting really bad, I was spending a lot of money on the dip, and about a year ago I started spitting out pieces of my gum in the morning when I woke up. The dentist always told me I had perfect teeth, and as soon as I could quit dipping I would be ok. After a while they started pointing at the lesions in my mouth and saying things like "these are pre-cancer, you need to really stop dipping".
I'm deployed again, and this time around I'm trying to get myself in better physical shape (at the gym, etc.). My nicotine addiction was really hurting my heart, I could tell every time I tried to run after waking up and putting in a dip. I stumbled upon this site and was inspired to go back to my room and throw away all my dip. I kept three cans in my "office". I went from dipping 14-15 hours a day to only dipping 7-8 hours a day. I felt like crap, honestly. I was having a hard time falling asleep, and I was waking up in a funk.
Just before the New Year I decided that I would just quit. There was one tiny dip still let in my Grizzly can at my office, but I threw it in a corner. I went for about 3 days with no dip, then for some reason I threw that dip in. It didn't taste good, I felt no effect from it, and I CERTAINLY didn't feel better. That tiny dip was January 2nd, and I've been running without dip ever since. I don't have any old dip laying around, and I've purged my room of anything that would remind me of dipping (empty water bottles, etc.).
This isn't the first time I've tried to quit nicotine. I tried when I was smoking and never made it past a day or two. I had a couple months of Army training and had to go off nicotine for almost 4 months, but when I got out I went right back to it. I tried to quit dipping on a prior deployment, and I made it 4 or 5 days before I got stressed out and went back on it again. This time feels different. I know what I need to do, and I'm doing it because I'm tired of dipping and really want a life change.
When I get back from Iraq I know I'm going to be very happy, not just happy because I'm back from Iraq, but happy because I'll have kicked a habit that has pestered me for the past 6 years.
Thanks for all your support, I'm going to continue to need the encouragement from here a lot in the coming days. I know I can do this, though, and I look forward to the 100 days with you all.
-
So I just posted on the roll call yesterday for the first time, the last time I had a dip was on the 3rd of January.
I want to say thanks to the makers of this site, you actually inspired me to quit completely.
My name is Andrew, I'm in the US Army and I'm currently deployed overseas (so if I post at weird times, I'm sorry). I was always a straight shooter kid through high school, but my addiction to nicotine started about 6 years ago when I was bored and decided I wanted to smoke my buddy's cigarette. That first cigarette led to a chain smoking addiction for two years, I was smoking a pack a day, sometimes more. When I was deployed to Iraq shortly after that I wasn't able to smoke all the time, so I started dipping instead. I was dipping around a can a day, sometimes less, sometimes more. It was hard to keep track, because I would wake up and dip a certain flavor, put it away, dip something else....I had open dip cans and spitters all around my room.
I came back to the states after that deployment and was dipping nonstop. My other half was not happy about that one. At least with smoking I didn't leave spitters or empty dip cans around the house, and I wasn't always sitting around with our friends looking like a moron with a face tumor. I really didn't care.
It was getting really bad, I was spending a lot of money on the dip, and about a year ago I started spitting out pieces of my gum in the morning when I woke up. The dentist always told me I had perfect teeth, and as soon as I could quit dipping I would be ok. After a while they started pointing at the lesions in my mouth and saying things like "these are pre-cancer, you need to really stop dipping".
I'm deployed again, and this time around I'm trying to get myself in better physical shape (at the gym, etc.). My nicotine addiction was really hurting my heart, I could tell every time I tried to run after waking up and putting in a dip. I stumbled upon this site and was inspired to go back to my room and throw away all my dip. I kept three cans in my "office". I went from dipping 14-15 hours a day to only dipping 7-8 hours a day. I felt like crap, honestly. I was having a hard time falling asleep, and I was waking up in a funk.
Just before the New Year I decided that I would just quit. There was one tiny dip still let in my Grizzly can at my office, but I threw it in a corner. I went for about 3 days with no dip, then for some reason I threw that dip in. It didn't taste good, I felt no effect from it, and I CERTAINLY didn't feel better. That tiny dip was January 2nd, and I've been running without dip ever since. I don't have any old dip laying around, and I've purged my room of anything that would remind me of dipping (empty water bottles, etc.).
This isn't the first time I've tried to quit nicotine. I tried when I was smoking and never made it past a day or two. I had a couple months of Army training and had to go off nicotine for almost 4 months, but when I got out I went right back to it. I tried to quit dipping on a prior deployment, and I made it 4 or 5 days before I got stressed out and went back on it again. This time feels different. I know what I need to do, and I'm doing it because I'm tired of dipping and really want a life change.
When I get back from Iraq I know I'm going to be very happy, not just happy because I'm back from Iraq, but happy because I'll have kicked a habit that has pestered me for the past 6 years.
Thanks for all your support, I'm going to continue to need the encouragement from here a lot in the coming days. I know I can do this, though, and I look forward to the 100 days with you all.
First of all, thank you for serving our country.
Now, from what i gather your on day 9. Which means you have already made it through the worst of it. We call this the suck or the fog. You have a lot of people on here that will bend over backwards to keep the nic bitch out of your system. Use them. Post roll everyday, and keep your word. Use the site as much as possible. Welcome to the ste, give me a shout if you need anything.
The Golden Domer
-
Yes, Andrew, thank you for your service first of all!
And congrats on your quit! Stay strong, post up, ask lots of questions. I'm proud to quit with you in April.
-
First of all, thank you for serving our country.
Now, from what i gather your on day 9. Which means you have already made it through the worst of it. We call this the suck or the fog. You have a lot of people on here that will bend over backwards to keep the nic bitch out of your system. Use them. Post roll everyday, and keep your word. Use the site as much as possible. Welcome to the ste, give me a shout if you need anything.
The Golden Domer
Well, I'm on Day 10 from what I can tell, the time is different here, about 8 hours from East Coast time, give or take. Right now it's afternoon on the 12th?
In either case, today's been a great one, last night I slept almost the whole night, I just tossed and turned till late and woke up early, but I didn't wake up on the hour like the last 4-5 nights. I felt a lot better this morning!
-
Andrew - tons of respect for you - thank you for your service! Stories like yours are incredibly motivating to this entire group - if you can quit while on deployment, what little shit problem that I'm dealing with could possibly be worth caving? Come here, post your promise, keep your word, scream if you need help - that's it. Let me know if I can do anything to help!
-
Well, today is pretty shitty. Yesterday I slept almost all night and it felt amazing. Tonight...not so much, I tossed and turned almost all night long. It was hard for me to fall asleep at all, and then I kept waking up at least once an hour. Terrible.
To make it worse I had an argument with my girlfriend over IM last night....for no real reason at all, I just started yelling at her for no reason. It's hard enough keeping a good relationship over here, even worse when I'm in a bad mood and pissed off from quitting.
I feel that huge buildup of stress during the day...one of the reasons why I started dipping in the first place. I've been trying to get rid of it through working out at the end of the day, but that only works sometimes. Definitely didn't work yesterday at all.
Ah well, there are great people on here encouraging me, but last night and this morning were just straight shitty.
Hopefully I'll be doing better this afternoon, I'm dead tired and yet stressed out at the same time.....
-
Another question for people in general:
I know that nicotine is supposedly really bad for circulation, but has anyone else had issues with their arms falling asleep when they sleep? I've had this happen to me for the past two years, and I'm just wondering if this is something that might go away now that I've quite dipping.......
Just some thoughts on that, if anyone knows about that aspect of the recovery process I'd be very grateful.
-
Another question for people in general:
I know that nicotine is supposedly really bad for circulation, but has anyone else had issues with their arms falling asleep when they sleep? I've had this happen to me for the past two years, and I'm just wondering if this is something that might go away now that I've quite dipping.......
Just some thoughts on that, if anyone knows about that aspect of the recovery process I'd be very grateful.
Interesting you mention this. This used to happen to me all the time. I always thought it was the way I slept. I can't say that my arms have fallen asleep on me in two years or better. I'm only one quitter.....interesting anyway.
-
Andrew glad to have a fellow service member in the quit. Stay strong and stay quit. I am on day 30 and the sleep does get better. I am doing alot of PT to stop the cravings too. PM me if you need anything or help just making it one day. I know how hard it is to be deployed and then try to quit. Take care and stay strong.
-
Another question for people in general:
I know that nicotine is supposedly really bad for circulation, but has anyone else had issues with their arms falling asleep when they sleep? I've had this happen to me for the past two years, and I'm just wondering if this is something that might go away now that I've quite dipping.......
Just some thoughts on that, if anyone knows about that aspect of the recovery process I'd be very grateful.
I had a bad problem with my foot falling asleep at odd times. I never made the connection until I quit. I am on day 47 and the problem has basically gone away. It improved over the first 3 weeks so much that I finally made the connection. Like Redtrain, I'm just one guy, but this was my story. Just another reason I am soooooooooooo glad I quit.
-
Andrew glad to have a fellow service member in the quit. Stay strong and stay quit. I am on day 30 and the sleep does get better. I am doing alot of PT to stop the cravings too. PM me if you need anything or help just making it one day. I know how hard it is to be deployed and then try to quit. Take care and stay strong.
Thanks, I appreciate it, even if it comes from a guy with "sapper" in his name. I've been running like crazy to help with things, but the sleep is really kicking my ass. Last night I decided I was just going to go to bed early, since I've been dead tired for the past week/10 days or so....I tossed and turned for 30 minutes, slept for 30 minutes, and continued that cycle all night long. Terrible. I know I have a much better life to look forward to, I hope relief comes soon. I'd like to sleep again....
-
Your body is re-adjusting and your brain is getting re-wired. Not a bad idea to go to the doctor and get some bloodwork done as you have already started off the new year in the right direction. Tell your doctor what is going on and how you feel. I am sure they will be supportive and give you the best direction possible. Stay quit and god bless. :D
-
Sleep will get better. It does take a few weeks though. For me anyway. Still have trouble at times. Stay strong you can do this.
-
Thanks for the encouragement, I actually fell asleep last night between midnight and 1 am and woke up to look at the clock...it was right around 5 AM! I was ecstatic, that's the longest I've slept in over a week. I actually had to double check my clock against my watch to make sure it was really true!
Today's been a great one, 13 days and counting without dip, almost a full night of sleep, and some great encouragement from the guys on this site. Sure, it's been hard, but things are shaping up, hopefully for good.
I still have some triggers, not so much in the usual areas you'd expect, but when I talk to some certain people I always want to have a dip in my mouth. I think I was using it as a crutch as well to give myself something to do while I listened to other people talk who I am....not so fond of, I guess you could say.
My back is killing me too....I used to try to dull the pain a little through nicotine use, but coming off it will probably force me to go get it looked at when I get back to the states near the end of the year. That might sound bad, but in reality it's good! My overall health is going to be so much better than when I was dipping....
It may sound strange, but I smelled my breath the other day....and it smells completely different. I don't think I ever realized how nasty my own breath was when I was dipping...with parts of my mouth dying....but that smell is definitely gone now...amazing!
-
Glad to hear you are sleeping better. The sleep will get even better. I think now I am sleeping better then ever. I have been using a little more Ranger candy then usual for aches and pains. Not sure if it is because of the quit or not. Anyway Keep it up and stay strong.
-
You will be sleeping like a baby soon. After the first 3- 4 day suck,lack of sleep was the hardest part of my quit. But it only lasted a few weeks. Into my second month and beyond, I was sleeping much better, and now better than I ever did when I dipped.
-
Well, I just woke up from a wonderful all-night sleep, hopefully this stays the trend from here on out. Unfortunately I dreamt that I was power-chain-smoking my way through a pack of cigarettes. I hope I don't start dreaming more about this, I woke up feeling like absolute shit for giving in to the nic. I got over it fast, but I really don't feel like waking up every day like that. Two weeks today, we're in it for the long haul now.
(edit)
So I was talking to a buddy, telling him that I was at two weeks, and a guy behind me spoke up and asked if I had really quit for two weeks. When I told him I did he told me that today was his four month quit day. That was really encouraging. Just thought I'd share....that there are those who go ahead and can help encourage those who are still just starting (like most of us).
-
Great 2 week quit.
-
The dreams definitely started.....
Last night was the second night that I had to suffer through a dip dream. This time I was at a supermarket, and I just wanted to get out of there before I started getting an urge to buy a roll of dip. I kept trying to grab cans of food, but everything looked like dip...the whole store, every single shelf, was stocked with rolls of dip. I finally managed to grab a gatorade and some gum and was at the register when someone cut in front of me and I was left standing there next to a rack of check-out dip. I was going nuts, and I was running from register to register trying to get out of the store.....
I hope this doesn't last long, I felt like crap when I woke up.
(edit)
Broke down and bought some seeds today. I don't usually go to the store for any reason, but I was craving HARD today. I have avoided the store for many reasons, but mostly because behind the checkout is a giant wall of rolls and rolls of dip and snuff...all tax free, of course. I have to walk past it to get out the door. So I grabbed my seeds and got out of there as fast as I could, the person who checked me out probably was wondering why I was sweating so profusely...but I made it. I'm glad I got the seeds, I needed something other than gum to help with the cravings.
-
Congrats! Two weeks is huge. I also had a dip dream last night...I'm at 129 days. I woke up totally depressed because I was sure I had caved...I even pictured the can in my hand in my back yard.
When I realized it was all just a dream, I was obviously relieved, but also amazed. That was a HUGE mind-fuck...I didn't even have any triggers other than watching football yesterday.
Anyway, stay strong.
-
Congrats! Two weeks is huge. I also had a dip dream last night...I'm at 129 days. I woke up totally depressed because I was sure I had caved...I even pictured the can in my hand in my back yard.
When I realized it was all just a dream, I was obviously relieved, but also amazed. That was a HUGE mind-fuck...I didn't even have any triggers other than watching football yesterday.
Anyway, stay strong.
The dip dreams are the bithes way of trying to convince you one more time that you need her. Your subconscious is starting to heal also.
My dip dreams changed to smoke dreams ?!?! 'Crazy'
STAY QUIT
-
I just started having trouble sleeping after my 4th day. Figured that would have come and gone by now. Not looking forward to the dreams at all. Hopefully I can skip those. Congrats on your 2 weeks Andrew.
-
The dreams definitely started.....
Last night was the second night that I had to suffer through a dip dream. This time I was at a supermarket, and I just wanted to get out of there before I started getting an urge to buy a roll of dip. I kept trying to grab cans of food, but everything looked like dip...the whole store, every single shelf, was stocked with rolls of dip. I finally managed to grab a gatorade and some gum and was at the register when someone cut in front of me and I was left standing there next to a rack of check-out dip. I was going nuts, and I was running from register to register trying to get out of the store.....
I hope this doesn't last long, I felt like crap when I woke up.
(edit)
Broke down and bought some seeds today. I don't usually go to the store for any reason, but I was craving HARD today. I have avoided the store for many reasons, but mostly because behind the checkout is a giant wall of rolls and rolls of dip and snuff...all tax free, of course. I have to walk past it to get out the door. So I grabbed my seeds and got out of there as fast as I could, the person who checked me out probably was wondering why I was sweating so profusely...but I made it. I'm glad I got the seeds, I needed something other than gum to help with the cravings.
I bought seeds today too. The lady behind the counter said: "It looks like you're looking for something else." I told her just the seeds as I was looking at the wall behind her. My brand was there. Fortunately, like you, I don't do that shit anymore. I reminded myself that I had posted roll (gave my solemn vow) and got the hell out of there.
I'm at day 10. At about day 5 or 6, I had a dream that I was on my annual golf trip around buddies who dip. I dreamed that I threw in a fatty after convincing myself that I had this whole nicotine thing whooped. The dream ended as I was buying a can on the drive back from the beach. Seemed so real. I was furious with myself. Just shows how much control the bitch gets over our lives.
-
No nic dream last night. I have to admit, even though that dream stressed me out two nights ago, I was impressed that even my subconscious was fighting the nicotine. I know that means I'm headed in the right direction, and I have the support of a lot of you to thank. So thank you all, everyone who has supported me thus far. I'm going to stick with this 100%, and you can too....just stay with me! We'll beat this shit!
-
I stay quit with Andrew.
-
Remember Andrew Infantry leads the way on lanes Engineer's have cleared. The lane is clear for your quit. :P
Thought I missed that sapper jab didn't you? Hahahaha
-
Remember Andrew Infantry leads the way on lanes Engineer's have cleared. The lane is clear for your quit. :P
Thought I missed that sapper jab didn't you? Hahahaha
Now what gave you the idea that I was infantry? I'm actually not....but I have served in units alongside 19Ds, 11Bs, 19Ks, 11Cs, and 13Fs.....
Last night I couldn't fall asleep for the longest time, I just felt like I had so much stress/anxiety built up in my chest. Not a great feeling at all. I tried turning on music, I even tried listening to one of those "nature sounds" discs that I had downloaded a while ago. None of it worked....no nic dreams last night, and I didn't wake up in the middle of the night...but I didn't get half as much sleep as I would have liked. Oh well. Today's still a great day to quit. No cravings today, this is probably the longest I've gone in the past few weeks without really having any bad cravings. Yesterday and the day before were bad, but I made it. I'll make it today too.....and so will you, just stick with me!
-
Thanks, I appreciate it, even if it comes from a guy with "sapper" in his name.Â
Hahaha..good to see a fellow service member quitting. I'm in day 4 of my quit, supposed to be deploying later this year and I'd like to be quit before I get over there. Can't imagine quitting in the middle of a tour like you are. And I don't have sapper in my screenname, but I'm a 12B. Suppose I should've been more original with my sn like sapperred hah.
-
Remember Andrew Infantry leads the way on lanes Engineer's have cleared. The lane is clear for your quit. :P
Thought I missed that sapper jab didn't you? Hahahaha
Now what gave you the idea that I was infantry? I'm actually not....but I have served in units alongside 19Ds, 11Bs, 19Ks, 11Cs, and 13Fs.....
You mean you falsely used the Ranger Tab :wacko:
I am still having sleep problems. At least I have not had any dreams for awhile. I am starting to think that guys like us might be high strung and the nic would mellow us. Now without this downer in our system we are going 100 mph all the time. That is how I feel anyway. I do know one thing for sure we can and will do this. Stay strong
-
Remember Andrew Infantry leads the way on lanes Engineer's have cleared. The lane is clear for your quit. :P
Thought I missed that sapper jab didn't you? Hahahaha
Now what gave you the idea that I was infantry? I'm actually not....but I have served in units alongside 19Ds, 11Bs, 19Ks, 11Cs, and 13Fs.....
You mean you falsely used the Ranger Tab :wacko:
I am still having sleep problems. At least I have not had any dreams for awhile. I am starting to think that guys like us might be high strung and the nic would mellow us. Now without this downer in our system we are going 100 mph all the time. That is how I feel anyway. I do know one thing for sure we can and will do this. Stay strong
Hey now. I earned that Ranger Tab. What are you trying to say?
Actually, Ranger School was the longest time I didn't have nicotine in my system...and I snuck a dip while I was there a couple times...the day I graduated I sat in my car and dipped almost two complete tins and then went out and smoked a pack of cigarettes. Talk about an addiction. I'm ready to be done with that!!!
-
Remember Andrew Infantry leads the way on lanes Engineer's have cleared. The lane is clear for your quit. :P
Thought I missed that sapper jab didn't you? Hahahaha
Now what gave you the idea that I was infantry? I'm actually not....but I have served in units alongside 19Ds, 11Bs, 19Ks, 11Cs, and 13Fs.....
You mean you falsely used the Ranger Tab :wacko:
I am still having sleep problems. At least I have not had any dreams for awhile. I am starting to think that guys like us might be high strung and the nic would mellow us. Now without this downer in our system we are going 100 mph all the time. That is how I feel anyway. I do know one thing for sure we can and will do this. Stay strong
Hey now. I earned that Ranger Tab. What are you trying to say?
Actually, Ranger School was the longest time I didn't have nicotine in my system...and I snuck a dip while I was there a couple times...the day I graduated I sat in my car and dipped almost two complete tins and then went out and smoked a pack of cigarettes. Talk about an addiction. I'm ready to be done with that!!!
When I was in AIT, we started getting passes. Thats where I first got hooked on this damn dip (smoked and quit before I left for basic). We'd either take our chances at buying it as one of the gas stations on post or at the PX, then when our pass was about over, try and find some creative place to stash it for when we would get our next pass a week later. Always got stolen somehow by other privates roaming around the post on pass. Eventually, being the entrepreneur that I am, I rented out a PO box in the PX and used it to store my dip, my buddies dip, some other guys cans (at a rental fee of course) and shit like gum and a porno mag. Lady caught me one time stuffing my PO box full of all this contraband and I turned around and was like..is it alright to put this in here? She was like..you know noone uses those more mail, long as you pay each month. Thought that was hilarious at the time.
I continued with it because I thought it would be useful to life in the military and relieve stress. Honestly, I think it just creates more. Went to NTC last august, I paid out a chunk of change to take 5 rolls with me. Lot of guys ran out while they were there, they werent trying to quit lol it was hellish.
-
hey just joking around some. It is amazing what we do with the crap to make up for what we missed. Having the raw lip and chain dippin still. Glad to be quit with you Andrew. Keep up the good work. Glad to be quit with Tony to but where is his intro?
-
hey just joking around some. It is amazing what we do with the crap to make up for what we missed. Having the raw lip and chain dippin still. Glad to be quit with you Andrew. Keep up the good work. Glad to be quit with Tony to but where is his intro?
Working on fixing my intro, its lost somewhere in the april thread. I'll make up a new one to add in here. Lol I think recycling to make it last longer when you didnt have access to fresh dip was the worst indicator about the level the addiction had been taken to. I redipped through NTC.
-
Another question for people in general:
I know that nicotine is supposedly really bad for circulation, but has anyone else had issues with their arms falling asleep when they sleep? I've had this happen to me for the past two years, and I'm just wondering if this is something that might go away now that I've quite dipping.......
Just some thoughts on that, if anyone knows about that aspect of the recovery process I'd be very grateful.
Interesting you mention this. This used to happen to me all the time. I always thought it was the way I slept. I can't say that my arms have fallen asleep on me in two years or better. I'm only one quitter.....interesting anyway.
That shit happened to me as well... I would fall asleep wih a dip in and wake up feeling like I was drowning. My arms were asleep, up to my shoulders, barely able to move my neck...then I would panic and dribble shit all over my pillow trying to roll over. I thought it was just the way I slept, but now that I think about it, that only happened the last two years of my can and half a day habit/
one of the reasons I quit, was, I was tired of buying new pillow cases...but now I don't have the tingles in the arms or the feeling of drowning... I won't say they immediatedly went away after I quit. I know that they don't occur anymore!
keep up the good work!
-
I think I'm starting to come around mentally. Sure, I still have triggers and cravings, but I'm beginning to see just how ridiculous all of that was. I used to hide cans of dip all over the place, just so that when I got done my "last" can I always had a spare hiding somewhere. I used to run out every night "just to get something out of the car" so I could grab a new can of dip and have a dip outside before going back inside and having the women be mad/sad with me. Remember when you would spit that giant hunk of shit out into a bottle and get it smeared all over your mouth? Remember when you would do that just so you could get a goodnight kiss? I do. I would stay up late playing video games or watching TV just to get that last uninterrupted dip in. I loved dip. I can see that now....I loved dip more than anything else in my life. More than my relationships, more than anything. I used to get mad when I couldn't find a spitter. I would spit into random things after that....just to piss her off for throwing out my spitters. She would come back home on a weekend and find me and a half-full gallon milk jug full of brown spit. How disgusting that was amazes me....how did I do that? How did I ever live like that?
Have you ever gone swimming with a dip in? I have. I swam out to my little raft holding my can of Grizzly over my head to keep it dry...that's how bad it was. I had so many people look at me and tell me "hey man, you have a problem" and I would just laugh and say "Yeah I do!". It's not funny in retrospect. Anyone ever driven through Illinois and paid 6+ dollars for tobacco, just because you needed a hit that badly? I did. Have you ever driven around the block just so you could smoke or dip in your car? I used to. Were you that guy that people always knew had an extra tin of dip on them? Not just a can, but two...just in case you ran out? I was.
I hated that life. I was a pusher, a user, a dealer......all of the above. I never want to go back to that, and I need you all to help me.....
-
I think I'm starting to come around mentally. Sure, I still have triggers and cravings, but I'm beginning to see just how ridiculous all of that was. I used to hide cans of dip all over the place, just so that when I got done my "last" can I always had a spare hiding somewhere. I used to run out every night "just to get something out of the car" so I could grab a new can of dip and have a dip outside before going back inside and having the women be mad/sad with me. Remember when you would spit that giant hunk of shit out into a bottle and get it smeared all over your mouth? Remember when you would do that just so you could get a goodnight kiss? I do. I would stay up late playing video games or watching TV just to get that last uninterrupted dip in. I loved dip. I can see that now....I loved dip more than anything else in my life. More than my relationships, more than anything. I used to get mad when I couldn't find a spitter. I would spit into random things after that....just to piss her off for throwing out my spitters. She would come back home on a weekend and find me and a half-full gallon milk jug full of brown spit. How disgusting that was amazes me....how did I do that? How did I ever live like that?
Have you ever gone swimming with a dip in? I have. I swam out to my little raft holding my can of Grizzly over my head to keep it dry...that's how bad it was. I had so many people look at me and tell me "hey man, you have a problem" and I would just laugh and say "Yeah I do!". It's not funny in retrospect. Anyone ever driven through Illinois and paid 6+ dollars for tobacco, just because you needed a hit that badly? I did. Have you ever driven around the block just so you could smoke or dip in your car? I used to. Were you that guy that people always knew had an extra tin of dip on them? Not just a can, but two...just in case you ran out? I was.
I hated that life. I was a pusher, a user, a dealer......all of the above. I never want to go back to that, and I need you all to help me.....
Right there with you Andrew, ditto on the whole damn thing. I bought special water tight containers for our float trips so my dip wouldn't get wet. Ever smoke and dip at the same time? I did - what the HELL was I thinking there? Bought bottle water/Gatorade/soda only to dump most of it out just to have a spitter? Regardless of how ridiculous we've been in the past we've made the right decision, we've taken back control of our lives.
Glad you're coming out of that early suck - keep your guard up and stay active on this site. You'll go through a few more pot holes on your way to the HOF, don't let that bitch back in - you got this.
Proud to quit with you!
-
Speaking of swimming. Did anyone else think the best thing about the newer MRE's was the little bag to heat water? A can fit in there perfect and would stay dry.
-
I did the milk gallon thing as a spitter..seriously, my apartment started to look like signs sometimes, only instead of water glasses, it was spitters. Then if I had someone coming over, I'd desperately try to throw em all out.
Ive been thinking it over some and had some realizations myself about how stupidly addicted Ive been to it. After taxes, I'd usually pay around $7/can. I mean..in 5 days..I've saved $35. Unless I ran over to Idaho and loaded up on cheap idaho logs, I had to really pay the price in WA. And when I ran out, I couldnt wait to drive to Idaho, I'd buy them in WA at their jacked up price instead.
I had to leave for NTC, for a month, so I bought 5 rolls to take with me-cost me around $170. I shouldve quit there because that was just dehydrating me and I had to drink even more water.
I'd go insane if I forgot a can, even if I was going to be within my 5 hour time window-that was the max I could safely go before I'd start to get panicky. And if I had a gf during the time of my addiction, I wouldn't tell her I dipped. I'd be a closet dipper-intentionally have to go take a shit now and then and sneak a pouch in there. Or take a drive to go get something. Its stupid.
And last night the stupid dreams started. It seemed like it was hours long-me staring at this ridiculously huge can of cope straight. Like a 3 foot wide can, just staring at it and someone was telling me to take a dip, the dream went away back to whatever it was before, and it interrupted my damn dream again.
-
I can't tell you how many times we have had guests over and I suddenly disappear into the bathroom for 10 minutes. It's a good thing the lady can entertain, because I'd be a terrible host. She always knew, too, since I'd leave my spitter in the bedroom bathroom if we had guests over. Man, I'm not going to miss those days at all.
-
Doing great today...didn't crave yesterday almost at all....only have one craving today right after eating lunch. It passed fast, though...My tongue is still really taking it hard, though...there are sores on both sides and it's really painfully sensitive. Suck!
-
Doing great today...didn't crave yesterday almost at all....only have one craving today right after eating lunch. It passed fast, though...My tongue is still really taking it hard, though...there are sores on both sides and it's really painfully sensitive. Suck!
Hey thats great! I think its awesome that you gave it up, while you were over there. Not sure I could do the same thing.
-
Man, I feel like I didn't sleep at all last night. Today I am already dragging, and I can feel cravings and small rationalizations popping up in my head....and it's been three weeks. I can't believe I'm still dealing with this stupid shit, it's driving me nuts. I just want to be able to sleep all night long, wake up feeling great, and not think about dip once during the day....is that too much to ask?
-
Man, I feel like I didn't sleep at all last night. Today I am already dragging, and I can feel cravings and small rationalizations popping up in my head....and it's been three weeks. I can't believe I'm still dealing with this stupid shit, it's driving me nuts. I just want to be able to sleep all night long, wake up feeling great, and not think about dip once during the day....is that too much to ask?
Yes! It is too much to ask douche nozzle. You poisoned yourself for years it will take some time before you are free. The nic bitch will not give back your soul easily....you have to earn it back one day at a time.......Now the good news: You are one bad ass mofo and you gave me and about 7000 other bad mofos your word that you would not use tobacco today! Now that thats off the table for the day do something else!
MOA
-
Aha aha, well, I went online and ordered some hooch just in case it gets worse in the new few weeks...I feel like there's a change, from needing it physically to psychologically in the last few days. I think anxiety more than anything else... I'm still kicking the shit out of nicotine, and I'm going to continue to!!
-
Aha aha, well, I went online and ordered some hooch just in case it gets worse in the new few weeks...I feel like there's a change, from needing it physically to psychologically in the last few days. I think anxiety more than anything else... I'm still kicking the shit out of nicotine, and I'm going to continue to!!
Because yours is the wallet that says "Bad Motherfucker" on it! You got this brudda.
MOA
-
Aha aha, well, I went online and ordered some hooch just in case it gets worse in the new few weeks...I feel like there's a change, from needing it physically to psychologically in the last few days. I think anxiety more than anything else... I'm still kicking the shit out of nicotine, and I'm going to continue to!!
Because yours is the wallet that says "Bad Motherfucker" on it! You got this brudda.
MOA
Keep pushing Andrew, you got this shit. I'm on day 16 today and yesterday I noticed I had more craves then previous. Stupid. I have some of that smokey mountain crap but rarely use it. Once in a while I'll throw one in before bed. Usually only stays in a few minutes because once it's in I realize I don't need the shit. Haha. 'Crazy'
The psychological side is ridiculous!
-
Aha aha, well, I went online and ordered some hooch just in case it gets worse in the new few weeks...I feel like there's a change, from needing it physically to psychologically in the last few days. I think anxiety more than anything else... I'm still kicking the shit out of nicotine, and I'm going to continue to!!
Because yours is the wallet that says "Bad Motherfucker" on it! You got this brudda.
MOA
Keep pushing Andrew, you got this shit. I'm on day 16 today and yesterday I noticed I had more craves then previous. Stupid. I have some of that smokey mountain crap but rarely use it. Once in a while I'll throw one in before bed. Usually only stays in a few minutes because once it's in I realize I don't need the shit. Haha. 'Crazy'
The psychological side is ridiculous!
Thanks man, I ordered some Hooch and I put in for a free trial of the Smokey Mountain stuff. I don't really need it right now, but by the time it mails to me I might be hurting. I probably should have thought about this earlier, it seems like the physical aspects are going away (I am sleeping better, I am actually starting to poop a bit...), but the cravings are getting a lot worse for some reason the past 2-3 days. I'll make it through, there's no chance of me caving....but if I can ease my mind at all that would be nice...my jaws hurt from chewing so much gum, and I've been eating way too many sunflower calories....
-
Aha aha, well, I went online and ordered some hooch just in case it gets worse in the new few weeks...I feel like there's a change, from needing it physically to psychologically in the last few days. I think anxiety more than anything else... I'm still kicking the shit out of nicotine, and I'm going to continue to!!
Because yours is the wallet that says "Bad Motherfucker" on it! You got this brudda.
MOA
Keep pushing Andrew, you got this shit. I'm on day 16 today and yesterday I noticed I had more craves then previous. Stupid. I have some of that smokey mountain crap but rarely use it. Once in a while I'll throw one in before bed. Usually only stays in a few minutes because once it's in I realize I don't need the shit. Haha. 'Crazy'
The psychological side is ridiculous!
Thanks man, I ordered some Hooch and I put in for a free trial of the Smokey Mountain stuff. I don't really need it right now, but by the time it mails to me I might be hurting. I probably should have thought about this earlier, it seems like the physical aspects are going away (I am sleeping better, I am actually starting to poop a bit...), but the cravings are getting a lot worse for some reason the past 2-3 days. I'll make it through, there's no chance of me caving....but if I can ease my mind at all that would be nice...my jaws hurt from chewing so much gum, and I've been eating way too many sunflower calories....
Another word of advice: Stay away from booze for a while.....We tend to make bad decisions when we drink too much. Ever brought home a whale? I rest my case. At least for a while stay sober and stay quit.
MOA
-
Aha aha, well, I went online and ordered some hooch just in case it gets worse in the new few weeks...I feel like there's a change, from needing it physically to psychologically in the last few days. I think anxiety more than anything else... I'm still kicking the shit out of nicotine, and I'm going to continue to!!
Because yours is the wallet that says "Bad Motherfucker" on it! You got this brudda.
MOA
Keep pushing Andrew, you got this shit. I'm on day 16 today and yesterday I noticed I had more craves then previous. Stupid. I have some of that smokey mountain crap but rarely use it. Once in a while I'll throw one in before bed. Usually only stays in a few minutes because once it's in I realize I don't need the shit. Haha. 'Crazy'
The psychological side is ridiculous!
Thanks man, I ordered some Hooch and I put in for a free trial of the Smokey Mountain stuff. I don't really need it right now, but by the time it mails to me I might be hurting. I probably should have thought about this earlier, it seems like the physical aspects are going away (I am sleeping better, I am actually starting to poop a bit...), but the cravings are getting a lot worse for some reason the past 2-3 days. I'll make it through, there's no chance of me caving....but if I can ease my mind at all that would be nice...my jaws hurt from chewing so much gum, and I've been eating way too many sunflower calories....
Another word of advice: Stay away from booze for a while.....We tend to make bad decisions when we drink too much. Ever brought home a whale? I rest my case. At least for a while stay sober and stay quit.
MOA
Easier done than said.....no alcohol here in Baghdad while deployed...
-
Thanks for your service Andrew.
-
It's getting late here, I tried to go to bed early...but I dreamt that I found a can of Kodiak mint (I used to hate Kodiak mint) buried in some gravel, that someone had dropped, and that I stuffed it all in my mouth, a full can in my mouth and down my throat....it was so full it was pouring out and I was choking on it and I was vomiting it back up...it was old and dry and stale........then it just turned into coffee grounds or something like that and I was coughing out sawdust. Terrible, terrible dream.
The whole time I was thinking, no I can't do that...I posted roll today...I can't cave...this isn't happening...what will everyone say?,...how can I go back to Day 1?
If you are sitting on the edge, trying to decide whether you want to quit and whether this system really works....it does. Posting roll and keeping accountability with this group of guys (and gals) has really gotten me to quit, even in my subconscious. Quit today. Yes, it's hell...but I would rather live in a nicotine free hell right now than continue to be enslaved to the poison.
-
It's getting late here, I tried to go to bed early...but I dreamt that I found a can of Kodiak mint (I used to hate Kodiak mint) buried in some gravel, that someone had dropped, and that I stuffed it all in my mouth, a full can in my mouth and down my throat....it was so full it was pouring out and I was choking on it and I was vomiting it back up...it was old and dry and stale........then it just turned into coffee grounds or something like that and I was coughing out sawdust. Terrible, terrible dream.
The whole time I was thinking, no I can't do that...I posted roll today...I can't cave...this isn't happening...what will everyone say?,...how can I go back to Day 1?
If you are sitting on the edge, trying to decide whether you want to quit and whether this system really works....it does. Posting roll and keeping accountability with this group of guys (and gals) has really gotten me to quit, even in my subconscious. Quit today. Yes, it's hell...but I would rather live in a nicotine free hell right now than continue to be enslaved to the poison.
yeah, it's the weirdest thing. i've had two of those dreams. I never thought about my wife, kid or even myself. I just woke up mad that i had broken my promise to a bunch of anonymous folks on the web and then started dreading the shit i was going to take.
-
You are so right this site works.
-
I thought the dip dreams would leave me alone when they stopped right around the two week mark...but they started up again yesterday. I have a hell of a time falling asleep and terrible dreams when I do.....man I'm starting to get really tired...like that long-lasting tired feel, not just "I need a nap" feel. There's no danger of me caving, but I wish this weren't so shitty feeling.
(edit)
OK, now I feel like a retard. I got to thinking that there has to be something else keeping me awake, since I am literally wide awake until 2-3 AM some nights. I checked all my supplement information and sure enough, there is one of my supplements that I take around 5 or 6 PM every night that has over 100 mg of caffeine a scoop...and I take about 2 scoops...so basically I drink 5 cups of coffee and try to go to bed 5 hours later. Not working out so well for me. Hmm. I may have to start getting used to staying up later....or maybe just slow down on the supplements...
-
AndrewÂ…Hang in there Ranger. Thanks for your service. I graduated class 01-93 and canÂ’t imagine ever making it through that school without Copenhagen so I know you are one tough dude. You will make it through this. I can remember actually rubbing cope juice in my eyes on purpose just to try and stay awake. Copenhagen got me through the 2000 Best Ranger Competition as well but thatÂ’s a whole other storyÂ…
Now back to this quit thingÂ…you ever need anything you give me a holler. IÂ’ll fly back over there on my own dime to help you out buddy because thatÂ’s how we rollÂ…just donÂ’t give up. IÂ’ll be looking for you at Roll Call and you know A Ranger never lies to another RangerÂ…
SoÂ…whatcha gonna do now PL
Hope you get this sleep thing fixed. Keep your muzzle out of the dirt and your knees in the breeze
RLTW
-
I thought I had my sleep plan all figured out...just stay up late and wake up a little later than usual and it'll gradually fix itself. Well, it was working last night, I went to bed late with the intention of waking up later than normal....and of course someone decided to test fire their gatling gun an hour and a half before I have to wake up. It's hard to go back to sleep after waking up to the sensation that you are being attacked by a chainsaw. FML.
(Oh, and Hootie...I was class 09-08...you have about 15 years on me...dip was like a drug, with a dealing ring and mules that got caught in my class...ridiculous. Coincidentally, my dad, who was class 02-81, experienced dipping for his first and only time while in Ranger School.)
-
It's hard to go back to sleep after waking up to the sensation that you are being attacked by a chainsaw. FML.
Sorry to hear about that. Yea that can be kinda stressfulÂ…You know what you need? A nice rock pillow. There is nothing better than a nice rock pillow to sleep on.
I can only feel like you will drone for just so long before your body takes over. Remember the drones in Ranger School and bumping into trees and putting money into imaginary soda machines and eating imaginary hamburgers
-
It's hard to go back to sleep after waking up to the sensation that you are being attacked by a chainsaw. FML.
Sorry to hear about that. Yea that can be kinda stressfulÂ…You know what you need? A nice rock pillow. There is nothing better than a nice rock pillow to sleep on.
I can only feel like you will drone for just so long before your body takes over. Remember the drones in Ranger School and bumping into trees and putting money into imaginary soda machines and eating imaginary hamburgersÂ…
Yes, I mistook a bush for an RI and had a short conversation with it. I also wandered up towards an amazingly warm and inviting looking chateau in the middle of the woods, only to have it vanish when I got close. I also saved my buddy from drinking his night vision goggles, which apparently looked very much like a nice cold Coke.
-
It's hard to go back to sleep after waking up to the sensation that you are being attacked by a chainsaw. FML.
Sorry to hear about that. Yea that can be kinda stressfulÂ…You know what you need? A nice rock pillow. There is nothing better than a nice rock pillow to sleep on.
I can only feel like you will drone for just so long before your body takes over. Remember the drones in Ranger School and bumping into trees and putting money into imaginary soda machines and eating imaginary hamburgersÂ…
Yes, I mistook a bush for an RI and had a short conversation with it. I also wandered up towards an amazingly warm and inviting looking chateau in the middle of the woods, only to have it vanish when I got close. I also saved my buddy from drinking his night vision goggles, which apparently looked very much like a nice cold Coke.
Very niceÂ…HereÂ’s another. We had just finished a raid of some sort or the other and for some reason the RIÂ’s didnÂ’t like the way we executed it (imagine that) and they were all real pissy. SoÂ…they end up taking charge of the platoon and roadmarching us back to the next patrol base. We are moving out at a pretty good clip down the middle of this road in the middle of the desert when all of the sudden the ranger in front of me stops. He stands in the middle of the road and puts his weapon on the groundÂ…drops his ruckÂ…drops his LBEÂ…and starts taking his BDU top off. I say HEY! What are you doing? He looks me straight in the face and saysÂ…IÂ’m taking a shower.
About the worst I ever got was trying to eat imaginary hamburgers. I would be walking along on patrol just droning and would imagine myself about to bite into an awesome looking cheeseburger. I would have a smile on my faceÂ…chomp down on a pretended mouthfulÂ…then wake up extremely pissed because I realized it wasnÂ’t real
-
I feel stressed out today and have been chewing gum like crazy and eating seeds like a starving pigeon. This sucks. I wish my fake stuff would get here soon...I should have ordered it back in December when I decided I was going to quit...what was I thinking, it'd probably be here by now if I'd have ordered then.
-
I feel stressed out today and have been chewing gum like crazy and eating seeds like a starving pigeon. This sucks. I wish my fake stuff would get here soon...I should have ordered it back in December when I decided I was going to quit...what was I thinking, it'd probably be here by now if I'd have ordered then.
Hang in there Andrew. ItÂ’ll pass. YouÂ’ve been through worse. Pain is weakness leaving your body and all the other comforting crap like that I can think of to tell youÂ…Man Up!
-
I feel stressed out today and have been chewing gum like crazy and eating seeds like a starving pigeon. This sucks. I wish my fake stuff would get here soon...I should have ordered it back in December when I decided I was going to quit...what was I thinking, it'd probably be here by now if I'd have ordered then.
Hang tough. The mouth sores have been bad for me the past couple days and I just got a couple more cans of hooch and don't even want to use it though part of me wants a pack in the lip--the pain ain't worth it so seeds have been more satisfying. The fake crap ain't a panacea remember that.
-
I feel stressed out today and have been chewing gum like crazy and eating seeds like a starving pigeon. This sucks. I wish my fake stuff would get here soon...I should have ordered it back in December when I decided I was going to quit...what was I thinking, it'd probably be here by now if I'd have ordered then.
Unwrap your thoughts, Andrew.
You do need to lose the "oral satisfaction" stigma, I'd imagine it's just as important as losing the nicotine.
It's been said before......when I quit drinking, the worst thing I could have done (other than drinking beer) would have been drinking "near beer".
Just my two cents.
-
I predict you'll fail miserably if you're hoping for the fake stuff to get there that badly.
-
I'm not hoping for the fake stuff to get here that badly, it's mostly just that I could have used it this week and probably not in two weeks when it finally gets here....in other words, money wasted. I should have thought ahead a little bit when I started my quit.......
Seeds are ok, but they cost me calories...gum is good but my teeth are hurting from chewing gum all the time. I've been chewing things since I was born (the collar of my shirt, my fingers, whatever)...it's just one of those things.
I ain't making excuses, I'm not going to cave. No nic ever again, this pain is definitely making that for sure.
It would also be easier for someone to be critical when they can solve a craving by...getting something to eat or running the grocery store. I don't have that luxury, I get a craving and I order fake shit online and wait three weeks for it to get here. It sucks.
-
Ain't trying to judge or criticize if I came off that way. Hell if my lip/gums didn't hurt I'd probably be going through a can a day of the fake stuff now, so my message to you was as much for my benefit as anyone's.
-
Yeah, I understand. That's why I wish I would have ordered it sooner or not ordered it at all, I'm afraid it's going to mess with my lips and gums again. I think they've been healing, from what I can tell...my tongue was really sore and swelled a little bit after the first week but I think it's about normal now. Who knows.
-
I feel stressed out today and have been chewing gum like crazy and eating seeds like a starving pigeon. This sucks. I wish my fake stuff would get here soon...I should have ordered it back in December when I decided I was going to quit...what was I thinking, it'd probably be here by now if I'd have ordered then.
Unwrap your thoughts, Andrew.
You do need to lose the "oral satisfaction" stigma, I'd imagine it's just as important as losing the nicotine.
It's been said before......when I quit drinking, the worst thing I could have done (other than drinking beer) would have been drinking "near beer".
Just my two cents.
I've been sober for 19 years and never used "near beer", it was dangerous because it had a small amount of alcohol in it. I did use the fake dip though, and it helped. Just going through the initial ritual of opening the can was a little scary because it was very familiar, however there is no nicotine in the fake stuff so it is perfectly safe. I found that it calmed me pretty quickly. Its the drug we are addicted to, not the fixation. If you get wiggy, try some coffee grounds or tea leaves. (Never tried the coffee myself, but I've heard it works)
-
So today I walked out of the chow hall and thought to myself "Man, I could really use some......gum!" That is to say that the first thing that came to mind after eating wasn't dip or dipping. I was actually happy with myself once I realized that.
Yes, I did get a box of Hooch yesterday. Actually, they sent me quite a bit of it, probably because of my circumstance, but in any case I tried some and I have to say that if I were still dipping this stuff would be disgusting, but while quitting I could see this being useful. I'm still going to chew gum for the most part, but there are times when I am craving something and have headphones on or earpieces in my and chewing gum irritates the hell out of me....and I can see the Hooch standing in well for that. I think I ordered a Smokey Mountain trial pack a while back too (one of those free trial packs), so I guess I'll try some of that too.
I'm not really a big fan of having something sit in my mouth anymore, so I'm wondering if I'm going to use all of this stuff and the stuff that's still in the mail. I might just save it till I get back to the states and have to drive a long distance, that's probably the biggest trigger I have by far.
-edit- Oh, and as far as dipping coffee goes, there is an Army "field dip" that involves opening a packet of instant coffee, dumping it into a small square of toilet paper, and then sticking that in your lip. I've seen in done countless times and have done it myself. It's straight up nasty.
-
So today I walked out of the chow hall and thought to myself "Man, I could really use some......gum!" That is to say that the first thing that came to mind after eating wasn't dip or dipping. I was actually happy with myself once I realized that.
Yes, I did get a box of Hooch yesterday. Actually, they sent me quite a bit of it, probably because of my circumstance, but in any case I tried some and I have to say that if I were still dipping this stuff would be disgusting, but while quitting I could see this being useful. I'm still going to chew gum for the most part, but there are times when I am craving something and have headphones on or earpieces in my and chewing gum irritates the hell out of me....and I can see the Hooch standing in well for that. I think I ordered a Smokey Mountain trial pack a while back too (one of those free trial packs), so I guess I'll try some of that too.
I'm not really a big fan of having something sit in my mouth anymore, so I'm wondering if I'm going to use all of this stuff and the stuff that's still in the mail. I might just save it till I get back to the states and have to drive a long distance, that's probably the biggest trigger I have by far.
-edit- Oh, and as far as dipping coffee goes, there is an Army "field dip" that involves opening a packet of instant coffee, dumping it into a small square of toilet paper, and then sticking that in your lip. I've seen in done countless times and have done it myself. It's straight up nasty.
Nice post. You gotta deal with the oral fixation on way or the other. It will take several months to do. Try not to use the fake shit. It is far to close in look, feel, and use to the real shit. It still costs money and simply makes it that much easier to "justify".
Maybe you can handle it. Maybe you are strong enough to make clear distinctions. LOOT ain't and LOOT knows it.
Know your limits. Don't test them. It's not worth it in this instance.
Be cool....be clean.
Never again, for any reason.
Shoot at some bad guys for LOOT today.
-
So today I walked out of the chow hall and thought to myself "Man, I could really use some......gum!" That is to say that the first thing that came to mind after eating wasn't dip or dipping. I was actually happy with myself once I realized that.
Yes, I did get a box of Hooch yesterday. Actually, they sent me quite a bit of it, probably because of my circumstance, but in any case I tried some and I have to say that if I were still dipping this stuff would be disgusting, but while quitting I could see this being useful. I'm still going to chew gum for the most part, but there are times when I am craving something and have headphones on or earpieces in my and chewing gum irritates the hell out of me....and I can see the Hooch standing in well for that. I think I ordered a Smokey Mountain trial pack a while back too (one of those free trial packs), so I guess I'll try some of that too.Â
I'm not really a big fan of having something sit in my mouth anymore, so I'm wondering if I'm going to use all of this stuff and the stuff that's still in the mail. I might just save it till I get back to the states and have to drive a long distance, that's probably the biggest trigger I have by far.
-edit- Oh, and as far as dipping coffee goes, there is an Army "field dip" that involves opening a packet of instant coffee, dumping it into a small square of toilet paper, and then sticking that in your lip. I've seen in done countless times and have done it myself. It's straight up nasty.
Nice post. You gotta deal with the oral fixation on way or the other. It will take several months to do. Try not to use the fake shit. It is far to close in look, feel, and use to the real shit. It still costs money and simply makes it that much easier to "justify".
Maybe you can handle it. Maybe you are strong enough to make clear distinctions. LOOT ain't and LOOT knows it.
Know your limits. Don't test them. It's not worth it in this instance.
Be cool....be clean.
Never again, for any reason.
Shoot at some bad guys for LOOT today.
I still use the fake stuff from time to time. Helps with a lot of what was my biggest triggers. Yeah, it looks and feels a lot like the real stuff. However, if this site has taught me that I can shove anything i want to into my mouth as long as its nic free.
-
30 DAYS NIC FREE!
I just wanted to say thanks to everyone on here for supporting me and putting up with me for the past month. Today I will celebrate my 30th day without putting nicotine in my body. I will quit again today and stand by that quit with the support of everyone on here and my own personal resolve. Thanks all, 70 more days till HOF!
-
30 DAYS NIC FREE!
I just wanted to say thanks to everyone on here for supporting me and putting up with me for the past month. Today I will celebrate my 30th day without putting nicotine in my body. I will quit again today and stand by that quit with the support of everyone on here and my own personal resolve. Thanks all, 70 more days till HOF!
30 days!!!
That's fucking awesome! 'clap'
Don't worry about the next 70. Worry about keeping your promise for today and then repeat tomorrow.
Brian
-
Congrats...30 days is huge, bud. Remember...it is done one day at a time.
-
congrats Andrew on your 30 days! I am getting there one day at a time. You sir, serve as an inspiration to me during my quit. I admire your stamina to stay the course and keep that shit out of your mouth, especially in a combat zone! I myself will be headed over your way in less than a month, but I do contract work while living onboard Aircraft Carriers. Anyway just wanted to stop by and say congrats and that I am proud to quit with you and the rest of us April Drama Queens!
-
Just got some of that Smokey Mountain that everyone's been talking about. I have to say, this is pretty tasty. Almost in a scary way. I will definitely keep this in mind when I am driving on the roads for long periods of time, though...it's a good alternative. The Hooch stuff...a little grainy for me...and the flavors are weird. Anyway, it's just a thought. I wish this would have gotten here weeks ago, as it helps me to divert some of the stress. Dip dreams haven't been an issue lately, I'm really feeling a lot better right now. Glad I got past the fog....one day at a time...
-
Just got some of that Smokey Mountain that everyone's been talking about. I have to say, this is pretty tasty. Almost in a scary way. I will definitely keep this in mind when I am driving on the roads for long periods of time, though...it's a good alternative. The Hooch stuff...a little grainy for me...and the flavors are weird. Anyway, it's just a thought. I wish this would have gotten here weeks ago, as it helps me to divert some of the stress. Dip dreams haven't been an issue lately, I'm really feeling a lot better right now. Glad I got past the fog....one day at a time...
Have a couple cans of the hooch and I definately prefer the smokey mtn. Got a 10 pack early during the pretend to quit phase and between mixing with grizz and just trying that when my real quit started I had one can that didn't make it past day 1. But that was enough to survive day 1. And when I mixed some tobasco with that wintergreen it did wonders for burn and spitability. Man, I can't wait til the time comes again when having a pack in my lip doesn't sound great but till then I can just say FU to the grizz everytime I see him at the gas station.
Well done on the month, keep it up
-
Apparently word is catching around that two of us here in the unit are quitting. There have been two more people who expressed interest, one who is at Day 2 and should be registering soon. Dipping is rampant in the Army and in our unit, and there are a lot of people who think it is just part of the culture. I'm surprised that there are so many people who want to quit now, but I also hope they are taking it as seriously as it is.
If you see my fellow soldiers here, don't cut them any slack. Kick their ass if they sound like they want to cave, and encourage them when they are in the fog.
This website has done wonders for my quit...and really kept me strong...do the same for the new guys!
If you're new and quitting: You can do it. You will not want to at times, but you CAN. Kick the nic bitch in the face and take back your life.
-
Apparently word is catching around that two of us here in the unit are quitting. There have been two more people who expressed interest, one who is at Day 2 and should be registering soon. Dipping is rampant in the Army and in our unit, and there are a lot of people who think it is just part of the culture. I'm surprised that there are so many people who want to quit now, but I also hope they are taking it as seriously as it is.
If you see my fellow soldiers here, don't cut them any slack. Kick their ass if they sound like they want to cave, and encourage them when they are in the fog.
This website has done wonders for my quit...and really kept me strong...do the same for the new guys!
If you're new and quitting: You can do it. You will not want to at times, but you CAN. Kick the nic bitch in the face and take back your life.
That's awesome Andrew!!
I'll keep my eyes open for them. Stay Quit my brother.
Brian
-
Well, today is the first day of me trying out a new schedule and forcing my body back into a healthy sleep cycle. Every since day 6-10 when I didn't sleep for about 3 days my sleep cycle has been really messed up. Now, about three weeks later, it's still messed up. I'm trying to get up an hour earlier and getting to bed a lot earlier. For some reason I have been staying up ridiculously late and not getting up until I absolutely have to. I set a schedule for myself and we're going to see how well I can stick to it. It includes all my meals, etc., so if I can stick to this I think I'll feel a lot better.
I'm glad to see the May class filling up slowly. To all new quitters: It gets better. Here I am a little over a month after quitting, and I don't have half the cravings I did two weeks ago. Sure, I still have cravings every once in a while, but it isn't intense and it doesn't last long. I have some Smokey Mountain or Hooch for backup if it gets ridiculous, but I'm finding that I'd rather NOT have a turd in my lip anymore, and that it makes me feel uncomfortable and stupid. It is stupid anyway, the whole addiction is stupid....
If you are just starting out, you will sleep again, and you will shit again (oh yes, it is getting better for me now), and you will soon be able to live your life without thinking every five minutes about the Nic Bitch.
-
Andrew,
Great to see you are staying strong in your quit! This is day 5 for me, first weekend. Saturday morning didn't feel right at first without the big nasty in my lip, then I went into the office for a few hrs by myself and it hit me again that a dip would be nice. I stopped at wal-mart on my way out and asked 3 store workers there for 'Hooch' and they looked at me like I was stupid. Then after realizing how pathetic I sounded to them trying to describe by saying 'It's a fake dip', I soon realized I lost the crave and was good the rest of the weekend.
Let's continue doing this brother! Nic-free!
I appreciate your service to our country!
-
An update from the chilly part of Baghdad:
I passed 40 days yesterday and things are subsiding. I did have some kind of dip dream last night, not sure what it was exactly, I don't remember much of it. My mind is healing.
I was chewing gum two days ago and bit my lip, causing a small knot to form...yesterday I bit it three more times while chewing gum and now it looks like a bee stung me on the face... I don't think this has to do so much with dipping as it does with me being retarded and incapable of chewing gum without hurting myself.
I haven't been using the fake stuff recently. I was right when I said I ordered it all too late, I gave the rest of my stash to Rhester03 (Day 12), wallaceo (Day 6), and one other member who wasn't posting roll and caved on Day 9. I think he's on Day 2 now, we'll see, Rhester03 and I are trying to get him to post roll but I think he's still dancing around the subject.
I won't lie, I caved too when I was starting off (you can see that my join date is about a week earlier than my quit date), I thought I could do it all by myself without posting roll and just get "inspiration" from this site. I went 2 or 3 days without dipping then put a tiny mouse turd of Grizzly (literally the last I had left in an empty can)...it was gross and I spit it out and started posting roll here a few days later. I was spared the shame of going back to Day 1 because I had never posted roll anyway....here's my lesson: Do yourself a favor and post roll, it will keep you from early caving and force you to own up to your actions.
I'm starting to get close to the longest I've ever gone 100% without nicotine. It's rough, and I still have at least one craving a day, but it GETS BETTER. I'm not jumpy and always waiting for my next chance to stick that shit in my lip anymore. I'm not spilling drool all over myself anymore, and my gums and lip don't burn when I fall asleep at night. I don't scrape parts of my cheek out of my mouth when I brush my teeth in the morning either. You can do it, it's worth it, and you need to keep quitting with me and the others here.....it's worth the pain, trust me!
-
Good Job. You are going on 6 weeks. A very large mile stone for me too. Started having major cravings around that time. Stay on alert for them. I know you can do this. I know you got this sir. Keep those other guys in line too.
-
andrew, very impressed with your success in quitting while serving, makes me think if he can do over there then i sure as hell can do it. lol Thx for the inspiration
-
Hadn't had a dip dream in a few weeks, but I had one last night. I wasn't craving or anything, I just turned around in my dream and I was holding a can of Copenhagen and my entire mouth was filled with it. I didn't put it in my mouth, it was just there. I started spewing Copenhagen on the ground trying to get it out of my mouth, it seemed like that continued forever.
I think it was really indicative of what kind of relationship I had with dip...it was just there. I dipped, not really thinking about it, or putting much effort into it. Now that I am free of it my subconscious is taking a little longer to agree on that, although every dream I've had about dip has been violently against it.
Anyway, that's an update...still staying quit out here. Stay strong everyone, it's well worth it.
-
50 Days! Halfway to HOF...pretty happy about that. This week we have the Iraqi Day of Rage, let's see how much Rage I have stored up from quitting!
RAGE!
-
50 Days! Halfway to HOF...pretty happy about that. This week we have the Iraqi Day of Rage, let's see how much Rage I have stored up from quitting!
RAGE!
I don't think you have stored the amount of Rage I have stored up recently... When do we get our day?
-
Past the 60 day mark and really doing well. There have been random urges here and there popping up. Today I managed to hit our shop again and standing there at the checkout next to the giant wall of tobacco the thought creeped into my head for a split second....what if you just bought a bag of tobacco instead of a can of dip.....? That thought lasted all of ten second before I pushed it out of my head and ran out of there as fast as I could. I haven't had cravings or urges for days now, and other than today I've been rolling along well.
The other day I was looking for something to eat in my room and I found a can of Hooch that I still had from weeks ago. I figured I'd try to pop it in my mouth and I realized just how uncomfortable it really is having something rubbing away at my gums. I spit it out and didn't think twice about it....
For those of you who are starting out and think that you will never be free from obsessing every second of the day...it gets better. I'm obviously not "cured" and I never will be, but the fight is easier now. I'm fighting a nicotine insurgency instead of a full blown war right now...little nicotine thoughts and urges creep up and ambush me and then I run away. Win the first battle of all out war on nicotine and you will make it to the long fight, the insurgency of nicotine, and having to battle it for short periods of time at random times. You can make it, though! Own your QUIT and stick with it!
-
Past the 60 day mark and really doing well. There have been random urges here and there popping up. Today I managed to hit our shop again and standing there at the checkout next to the giant wall of tobacco the thought creeped into my head for a split second....what if you just bought a bag of tobacco instead of a can of dip.....? That thought lasted all of ten second before I pushed it out of my head and ran out of there as fast as I could. I haven't had cravings or urges for days now, and other than today I've been rolling along well.
The other day I was looking for something to eat in my room and I found a can of Hooch that I still had from weeks ago. I figured I'd try to pop it in my mouth and I realized just how uncomfortable it really is having something rubbing away at my gums. I spit it out and didn't think twice about it....
For those of you who are starting out and think that you will never be free from obsessing every second of the day...it gets better. I'm obviously not "cured" and I never will be, but the fight is easier now. I'm fighting a nicotine insurgency instead of a full blown war right now...little nicotine thoughts and urges creep up and ambush me and then I run away. Win the first battle of all out war on nicotine and you will make it to the long fight, the insurgency of nicotine, and having to battle it for short periods of time at random times. You can make it, though! Own your QUIT and stick with it!
Great news. It is nice when you can string a few days of coasting together early in your quit. Enjoy. Enjoy and rest. Rest up for the next battle. You know it is coming.
Try and prepare yourself for situations/triggers that you can see coming. Everything you do will be a first without dip, plan for it. Craves that you have planned for are easier to deal with than triggers that unaccounted for. Planning helps your short term quit.
Congrats on 60. Be ready for the next funk little bro.
Never again, for any reason.
-
Good to hear it's going well now. I like your analogy in battle terms. The addict in mean is trying to tell me I don't have the fight to wage this war everyday forever and that I should surrender even though victory is so obviously achievable now in this fight. So I just try to embrace fighting each urge each day, but I must admit that I hope that soon come days when I don't think about dip for a couple days. I've given enough of my life to dip, tired of giving more now even in thought and lustful desire.
-
After day 60 I thought I would have smooth sailing...I'm over halfway to HOF, I'm done with sucking, I'm going to breeze right through this! Well, this past week has been pretty terrible. Insomnia started up again and it's been wiping me out. Add to that more stress at work and life began to suck again. Throw in a dream or two about random tobacco products (nothing major or exciting, I just wake up remembering seeing a pouch of tobacco or something like that) and it's been miserable again. It's been going better today, but for about 3-4 days it was really dragging.
Of course, today would have been excellent since I finally got to sleep early last night....except rhester03 came and banged on my door past midnight....
-
After day 60 I thought I would have smooth sailing...I'm over halfway to HOF, I'm done with sucking, I'm going to breeze right through this! Well, this past week has been pretty terrible. Insomnia started up again and it's been wiping me out. Add to that more stress at work and life began to suck again. Throw in a dream or two about random tobacco products (nothing major or exciting, I just wake up remembering seeing a pouch of tobacco or something like that) and it's been miserable again. It's been going better today, but for about 3-4 days it was really dragging.
Of course, today would have been excellent since I finally got to sleep early last night....except rhester03 came and banged on my door past midnight....
Andrew,
The 60s and 70s were tough for me as well. It got better once I hit the 80s. I also had depression as well as the symptoms that you described. Apparently, the nic bitch does not give up easily. She knows you dumped her, and she is pissed.
-
So the early 70's weren't bad...the late 70's sucked, though...I didn't sleep right for about 5 days. I couldn't fall asleep at night, and just wasn't tired, but then I was unable to wake up at ALL once I fell asleep. I would sleep through my alarm clock going off next to my head for over an hour.
I finally took some herbal stuff I ordered online (a bodybuilding supplement that promotes heavy sleep) and knocked myself out last night. I woke up at the right time this morning feeling much refreshed. It's true, though...this close-to-HOF-quit sucks a little more than the mid 50's or so.
I'm doing better, though, and I'm learning how to deal with these things, such as the 3-4 day doldrums that seem to appear out of nowhere. Anyway, that's the update for today.
Good luck to all my June and July HOF quitters. It's going to be well worth it for all of you. Stick with the quit, you will be happy you did once you make it past the first 10 days or so.
-
Here I am at Day 87. Last night I had a dip dream. I hadn't had a dip dream in about 20 days, since the mid 60's. This dream was just like most of the other dip dreams....
I'm in the middle of a perfectly normal dream and I turn around and I have my mouth full of dip. It's not just a lip turd, it's a whole can packed into my mouth. I start freaking out because I don't want to go back to Day 1. My first thoughts are always about how I don't want to go back to Day 1 and how I posted roll and how I can't give that up. At the same time I'm thinking to myself how much I could just keep it in....it all happens in a split second, I start spewing it out of my mouth trying to get it out of my mouth, somehow thinking that by getting it out of my mouth fast enough it won't take me back to Day 1.... I am blowing nasty dip everywhere, it's like it never stops coming out of my mouth, I can't get it all out of my mouth......
Then I wake up and realize that I'm still at Day 87, and that the nic bitch is still there, rooted in the back of my brain, even though I don't have cravings any more and even though I'm past the fog....it's still a long process....and one of the only things keeping me going is this site and posting roll and not wanting to go back to that awful Day 1.....
-
Here I am at Day 87. Last night I had a dip dream. I hadn't had a dip dream in about 20 days, since the mid 60's. This dream was just like most of the other dip dreams....
I'm in the middle of a perfectly normal dream and I turn around and I have my mouth full of dip. It's not just a lip turd, it's a whole can packed into my mouth. I start freaking out because I don't want to go back to Day 1. My first thoughts are always about how I don't want to go back to Day 1 and how I posted roll and how I can't give that up. At the same time I'm thinking to myself how much I could just keep it in....it all happens in a split second, I start spewing it out of my mouth trying to get it out of my mouth, somehow thinking that by getting it out of my mouth fast enough it won't take me back to Day 1.... I am blowing nasty dip everywhere, it's like it never stops coming out of my mouth, I can't get it all out of my mouth......
Then I wake up and realize that I'm still at Day 87, and that the nic bitch is still there, rooted in the back of my brain, even though I don't have cravings any more and even though I'm past the fog....it's still a long process....and one of the only things keeping me going is this site and posting roll and not wanting to go back to that awful Day 1.....
Yep, the nic bitch will always be around. Even me at nearly 250 days I still have a craving for a big old pinch of Copenhagen every now and then. But I remember all the hell it caused and what it could have caused and I stay away. Just hang tough and you'll be just fine.
Dave
-
I've had this very same dream more times than I can count, Andrew. I can't tell you when they will go away just yet, because they haven't, but I do know they lessen in frequency and intensity over time. What I can tell you is that eventually, instead of waking up in a panic, you will wake up with a little laugh and say, "stupid bitch".
It takes a good long time to fix stupid.
-
Thanks for the encouragement guys...I really needed it, the last 5 days or so have been rough, yesterday it was like I was walking around in the fog again. Thankfully I slept it off and feel much better today.
Do you think that any flashbacks or funkiness occurs due to second hand smoke inhalation? There have been a few times this week where someone was smoking while talking to me and I was very aware of me inhaling a small amount of smoke. The guys around me also smoke and sometimes at night my living area smells like smoke. Any thoughts on that?
-
Thanks for the encouragement guys...I really needed it, the last 5 days or so have been rough, yesterday it was like I was walking around in the fog again. Thankfully I slept it off and feel much better today.
Do you think that any flashbacks or funkiness occurs due to second hand smoke inhalation? There have been a few times this week where someone was smoking while talking to me and I was very aware of me inhaling a small amount of smoke. The guys around me also smoke and sometimes at night my living area smells like smoke. Any thoughts on that?
I am not around second hand smoke but enjoyed the same thrills as you. Just part of the suck. It seems to become less frequent and less intense as time goes on.
-
Thanks for the encouragement guys...I really needed it, the last 5 days or so have been rough, yesterday it was like I was walking around in the fog again. Thankfully I slept it off and feel much better today.
Do you think that any flashbacks or funkiness occurs due to second hand smoke inhalation? There have been a few times this week where someone was smoking while talking to me and I was very aware of me inhaling a small amount of smoke. The guys around me also smoke and sometimes at night my living area smells like smoke. Any thoughts on that?
I am not around second hand smoke but enjoyed the same thrills as you. Just part of the suck. It seems to become less frequent and less intense as time goes on.
I think that's part of the mind games. You're thinking, "oh shit, second hand smoke, I have to be breathing some....how much it too much?...."
Its also a form of a trigger. I'm sure that when all those guys were smoking, you were most likely doing your thing as well. Its no different than going fishing or working in the garage.....no different than Pavlov's dog.
Don't worry about it, those feelings will pass also.
-
Speaking of mind games, I went to a weekly meeting yesterday, and the "big" boss walks in and puts a bag full of 8 LOGS of mint Skoal on the table. Apparently he just had a chance to get some shopping done, or someone sent it to him or something. . . but for a split second I could hear myself saying "hey, can I get a pinch of that" and seeing a can fly through the air into my hands, and the minty shit smell of mint Skoal...the way it would feel in my hands.....I snapped out of it fast, and ignored the bag for the rest of the time in there, but for that one split second I could just imagine myself thinking, "hey, I made it 90 days, I should reward myself with just a little dip".
Fuck the nic bitch, she's still in my head.
Props to my fellow April quitters for making it this close to the HOF. Don't give in now, we have come this far, we have to continue day by day...never let your guard down!
-
Probably a good choice that smell of mint ass would be stuck to your fingers for days if you had. Anything in the world smell worse than skoal mint? Can't believe I started on that crap.
Stay tough Andrew!
-
Speaking of mind games, I went to a weekly meeting yesterday, and the "big" boss walks in and puts a bag full of 8 LOGS of mint Skoal on the table.Â
Andrew says, "Hey I got a big log of quit right here and I have your back when you are ready."
-
They know I've quit. I've been yelled at before by the "big, big" boss for popping my gum in meetings. Thankfully I rarely have to attend said meetings....can't stand sitting there without popping my gum. I'm a serial popper.
-
Well, here we are at Day 100.
It's no secret that the addiction is still present, but the cravings are barely around anymore and I'm not having as much trouble sleeping.
I replaced a lot of time spent dipping with time spent working out (not going to dip in the gym, right?) and since Day 1 I've lost between 15 and 20 lbs and pushed my bodyfat down 5-6%. I'm in pretty good shape, especially because my heart isn't racing and begging for more nicotine all the time.
It's no secret I've had a few emotional/mental breakdowns since quitting. Once I got past the haze it seemed like I was just angry for about four days every month or so. Not much I can do about that except for apologize to the lady...surprisingly she's stuck with me through the past 100 days even while our only communication is over IM.
I worked on my diet a lot, since I used to just dip whenever I got hungry. I found out that I can actually snack during the day instead of stuffing my face and spitting it away.
The bad sides of the last 100 days....
It sucked. Mentally and emotionally I've been a wreck. Stress seems much more viable and present. I can't hide behind my lip anymore, I have to deal with things (sounds weird, but we all knows it's true). Somehow I bit my lip hard while chewing gum and there's a semi-permanent knot there for about two months. I'm hoping it's nothing serious....really scared to get it checked out. Tooth-wise all the gum chewing and the changing pH of my mouth is making me think I have a few cavities...I have some sharp pains while chewing now. Digestively my insides stopped working for a week, churned for a week, and then it was off and on since then. Add to that all the stress and working out and I gave myself a nice case of hemorrhoids. The dreams can sometimes be intense, and most of the time I found myself fighting it off...but sometimes I didn't...and woke up feeling as if I had caved. It's a bad feeling.
All in all I am happy I've taken this step. I'm quit now, and I'm staying quit today. I'll continue posting as long as I can feasibly (basically until things change here in Iraq). I risk nothing by continuing to support this site.
Just wanted to throw all that out there for the guys who have been following me and my quit. Stay quit today. I will.
-
Well, here we are at Day 100.
It's no secret that the addiction is still present, but the cravings are barely around anymore and I'm not having as much trouble sleeping.
I replaced a lot of time spent dipping with time spent working out (not going to dip in the gym, right?) and since Day 1 I've lost between 15 and 20 lbs and pushed my bodyfat down 5-6%. I'm in pretty good shape, especially because my heart isn't racing and begging for more nicotine all the time.
It's no secret I've had a few emotional/mental breakdowns since quitting. Once I got past the haze it seemed like I was just angry for about four days every month or so. Not much I can do about that except for apologize to the lady...surprisingly she's stuck with me through the past 100 days even while our only communication is over IM.
I worked on my diet a lot, since I used to just dip whenever I got hungry. I found out that I can actually snack during the day instead of stuffing my face and spitting it away.
The bad sides of the last 100 days....
It sucked. Mentally and emotionally I've been a wreck. Stress seems much more viable and present. I can't hide behind my lip anymore, I have to deal with things (sounds weird, but we all knows it's true). Somehow I bit my lip hard while chewing gum and there's a semi-permanent knot there for about two months. I'm hoping it's nothing serious....really scared to get it checked out. Tooth-wise all the gum chewing and the changing pH of my mouth is making me think I have a few cavities...I have some sharp pains while chewing now. Digestively my insides stopped working for a week, churned for a week, and then it was off and on since then. Add to that all the stress and working out and I gave myself a nice case of hemorrhoids. The dreams can sometimes be intense, and most of the time I found myself fighting it off...but sometimes I didn't...and woke up feeling as if I had caved. It's a bad feeling.
All in all I am happy I've taken this step. I'm quit now, and I'm staying quit today. I'll continue posting as long as I can feasibly (basically until things change here in Iraq). I risk nothing by continuing to support this site.
Just wanted to throw all that out there for the guys who have been following me and my quit. Stay quit today. I will.
All you guys quitting in Iraq, Afghanistan, and in the service are my heroes. If you guys can quit while sacrificing so much, there is no reason in the world I can't quit while enjoying the safety and freedom you provide for us in the states. Thank you does not express my gratitude but it all that can be said.
-
Well, here we are at Day 100.
It's no secret that the addiction is still present, but the cravings are barely around anymore and I'm not having as much trouble sleeping.Â
I replaced a lot of time spent dipping with time spent working out (not going to dip in the gym, right?) and since Day 1 I've lost between 15 and 20 lbs and pushed my bodyfat down 5-6%. I'm in pretty good shape, especially because my heart isn't racing and begging for more nicotine all the time.
It's no secret I've had a few emotional/mental breakdowns since quitting. Once I got past the haze it seemed like I was just angry for about four days every month or so. Not much I can do about that except for apologize to the lady...surprisingly she's stuck with me through the past 100 days even while our only communication is over IM.
I worked on my diet a lot, since I used to just dip whenever I got hungry. I found out that I can actually snack during the day instead of stuffing my face and spitting it away.Â
The bad sides of the last 100 days....
It sucked. Mentally and emotionally I've been a wreck. Stress seems much more viable and present. I can't hide behind my lip anymore, I have to deal with things (sounds weird, but we all knows it's true). Somehow I bit my lip hard while chewing gum and there's a semi-permanent knot there for about two months. I'm hoping it's nothing serious....really scared to get it checked out. Tooth-wise all the gum chewing and the changing pH of my mouth is making me think I have a few cavities...I have some sharp pains while chewing now. Digestively my insides stopped working for a week, churned for a week, and then it was off and on since then. Add to that all the stress and working out and I gave myself a nice case of hemorrhoids. The dreams can sometimes be intense, and most of the time I found myself fighting it off...but sometimes I didn't...and woke up feeling as if I had caved. It's a bad feeling.
All in all I am happy I've taken this step. I'm quit now, and I'm staying quit today. I'll continue posting as long as I can feasibly (basically until things change here in Iraq). I risk nothing by continuing to support this site.
Just wanted to throw all that out there for the guys who have been following me and my quit. Stay quit today. I will.
All you guys quitting in Iraq, Afghanistan, and in the service are my heroes. If you guys can quit while sacrificing so much, there is no reason in the world I can't quit while enjoying the safety and freedom you provide for us in the states. Thank you does not express my gratitude but it all that can be said.
X2
-
Well, here we are at Day 100.
It's no secret that the addiction is still present, but the cravings are barely around anymore and I'm not having as much trouble sleeping.Â
I replaced a lot of time spent dipping with time spent working out (not going to dip in the gym, right?) and since Day 1 I've lost between 15 and 20 lbs and pushed my bodyfat down 5-6%. I'm in pretty good shape, especially because my heart isn't racing and begging for more nicotine all the time.
It's no secret I've had a few emotional/mental breakdowns since quitting. Once I got past the haze it seemed like I was just angry for about four days every month or so. Not much I can do about that except for apologize to the lady...surprisingly she's stuck with me through the past 100 days even while our only communication is over IM.
I worked on my diet a lot, since I used to just dip whenever I got hungry. I found out that I can actually snack during the day instead of stuffing my face and spitting it away.Â
The bad sides of the last 100 days....
It sucked. Mentally and emotionally I've been a wreck. Stress seems much more viable and present. I can't hide behind my lip anymore, I have to deal with things (sounds weird, but we all knows it's true). Somehow I bit my lip hard while chewing gum and there's a semi-permanent knot there for about two months. I'm hoping it's nothing serious....really scared to get it checked out. Tooth-wise all the gum chewing and the changing pH of my mouth is making me think I have a few cavities...I have some sharp pains while chewing now. Digestively my insides stopped working for a week, churned for a week, and then it was off and on since then. Add to that all the stress and working out and I gave myself a nice case of hemorrhoids. The dreams can sometimes be intense, and most of the time I found myself fighting it off...but sometimes I didn't...and woke up feeling as if I had caved. It's a bad feeling.
All in all I am happy I've taken this step. I'm quit now, and I'm staying quit today. I'll continue posting as long as I can feasibly (basically until things change here in Iraq). I risk nothing by continuing to support this site.
Just wanted to throw all that out there for the guys who have been following me and my quit. Stay quit today. I will.
All you guys quitting in Iraq, Afghanistan, and in the service are my heroes. If you guys can quit while sacrificing so much, there is no reason in the world I can't quit while enjoying the safety and freedom you provide for us in the states. Thank you does not express my gratitude but it all that can be said.
X2
X3
-
Well, here we are at Day 100.
It's no secret that the addiction is still present, but the cravings are barely around anymore and I'm not having as much trouble sleeping.Â
I replaced a lot of time spent dipping with time spent working out (not going to dip in the gym, right?) and since Day 1 I've lost between 15 and 20 lbs and pushed my bodyfat down 5-6%. I'm in pretty good shape, especially because my heart isn't racing and begging for more nicotine all the time.
It's no secret I've had a few emotional/mental breakdowns since quitting. Once I got past the haze it seemed like I was just angry for about four days every month or so. Not much I can do about that except for apologize to the lady...surprisingly she's stuck with me through the past 100 days even while our only communication is over IM.
I worked on my diet a lot, since I used to just dip whenever I got hungry. I found out that I can actually snack during the day instead of stuffing my face and spitting it away.Â
The bad sides of the last 100 days....
It sucked. Mentally and emotionally I've been a wreck. Stress seems much more viable and present. I can't hide behind my lip anymore, I have to deal with things (sounds weird, but we all knows it's true). Somehow I bit my lip hard while chewing gum and there's a semi-permanent knot there for about two months. I'm hoping it's nothing serious....really scared to get it checked out. Tooth-wise all the gum chewing and the changing pH of my mouth is making me think I have a few cavities...I have some sharp pains while chewing now. Digestively my insides stopped working for a week, churned for a week, and then it was off and on since then. Add to that all the stress and working out and I gave myself a nice case of hemorrhoids. The dreams can sometimes be intense, and most of the time I found myself fighting it off...but sometimes I didn't...and woke up feeling as if I had caved. It's a bad feeling.
All in all I am happy I've taken this step. I'm quit now, and I'm staying quit today. I'll continue posting as long as I can feasibly (basically until things change here in Iraq). I risk nothing by continuing to support this site.
Just wanted to throw all that out there for the guys who have been following me and my quit. Stay quit today. I will.
All you guys quitting in Iraq, Afghanistan, and in the service are my heroes. If you guys can quit while sacrificing so much, there is no reason in the world I can't quit while enjoying the safety and freedom you provide for us in the states. Thank you does not express my gratitude but it all that can be said.
X2
X3
X4...Keep 'er going
-
Well, here we are at Day 100.
It's no secret that the addiction is still present, but the cravings are barely around anymore and I'm not having as much trouble sleeping.Â
I replaced a lot of time spent dipping with time spent working out (not going to dip in the gym, right?) and since Day 1 I've lost between 15 and 20 lbs and pushed my bodyfat down 5-6%. I'm in pretty good shape, especially because my heart isn't racing and begging for more nicotine all the time.
It's no secret I've had a few emotional/mental breakdowns since quitting. Once I got past the haze it seemed like I was just angry for about four days every month or so. Not much I can do about that except for apologize to the lady...surprisingly she's stuck with me through the past 100 days even while our only communication is over IM.
I worked on my diet a lot, since I used to just dip whenever I got hungry. I found out that I can actually snack during the day instead of stuffing my face and spitting it away.Â
The bad sides of the last 100 days....
It sucked. Mentally and emotionally I've been a wreck. Stress seems much more viable and present. I can't hide behind my lip anymore, I have to deal with things (sounds weird, but we all knows it's true). Somehow I bit my lip hard while chewing gum and there's a semi-permanent knot there for about two months. I'm hoping it's nothing serious....really scared to get it checked out. Tooth-wise all the gum chewing and the changing pH of my mouth is making me think I have a few cavities...I have some sharp pains while chewing now. Digestively my insides stopped working for a week, churned for a week, and then it was off and on since then. Add to that all the stress and working out and I gave myself a nice case of hemorrhoids. The dreams can sometimes be intense, and most of the time I found myself fighting it off...but sometimes I didn't...and woke up feeling as if I had caved. It's a bad feeling.
All in all I am happy I've taken this step. I'm quit now, and I'm staying quit today. I'll continue posting as long as I can feasibly (basically until things change here in Iraq). I risk nothing by continuing to support this site.
Just wanted to throw all that out there for the guys who have been following me and my quit. Stay quit today. I will.
All you guys quitting in Iraq, Afghanistan, and in the service are my heroes. If you guys can quit while sacrificing so much, there is no reason in the world I can't quit while enjoying the safety and freedom you provide for us in the states. Thank you does not express my gratitude but it all that can be said.
X2
X3
X4...Keep 'er going
x5