KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Raz79 on July 07, 2014, 04:27:00 PM
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I keep asking myself WHY.
Why did I start dipping 4 years ago. Was it due to lack of confidence in myself? Was it stress at work? Was it stress at home with two kids? Was it just fun and I didn't give a fuck? I can't remember!
I used to ninja dip at work for the last 4 years. There was nothing better than having a cup of coffee in the morning followed by some Skoal, Cope, or Grizz (I didn't care, just wanted some nic). It was my routine. I'm a money manager and dip for me was a way to relax and keep calm as markets moved up and down. Like a baseball player, it brought me focus or I thought it did. The funny thing was, I never craved it at home, but at work that was always different. People talk about triggers, my trigger was work! Dip in at 6:30am to 4:00pm, except for lunch. When I first started I told myself that I would just do it for a little while. How many lies do we need to tell ourselves to keep our little nic bitch around! Justification, lies, more lies.
I've wasted so many nights thinking about quitting, beating myself over it, and the guilt of hiding it from my family. Can you imagine my wife having no idea of my addiction and one day telling her that I'm going to die from cancer. Sorry I was so selfish, sorry I left you with the kids, sorry kids your dad will not see you grow up, sorry that the guy you counted on checked out early. Sorry, Sorry, Sorry, and I don't even know WHY I dipped in the first place!
This site has help me realize that it doesn't matter WHY I started, but rather that I am an ADDICT!
Day 17 and going strong on my quit! Thank you brothers for your thoughts, struggles, and inspiration. Its been great to hear the many similar stories. Looking forward to the next day of my quit and enjoying life one day and a time.
Raz79
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Man, that coulda been something I wrote when I first quit.
17 days is huge man. Huge!
What I would say to you right now is... Don't look back. Don't beat yourself up. Don't berate yourself. Let go of that baggage.
You've started down the road to a new you. Make THAT your focus each day. Work on THAT guy. The other guy isn't you anymore.
You need another number, want to be held even more accountable, pm me and my number is yours bro.
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I keep asking myself WHY.
Why did I start dipping 4 years ago. Was it due to lack of confidence in myself? Was it stress at work? Was it stress at home with two kids? Was it just fun and I didn't give a fuck? I can't remember!
I used to ninja dip at work for the last 4 years. There was nothing better than having a cup of coffee in the morning followed by some Skoal, Cope, or Grizz (I didn't care, just wanted some nic). It was my routine. I'm a money manager and dip for me was a way to relax and keep calm as markets moved up and down. Like a baseball player, it brought me focus or I thought it did. The funny thing was, I never craved it at home, but at work that was always different. People talk about triggers, my trigger was work! Dip in at 6:30am to 4:00pm, except for lunch. When I first started I told myself that I would just do it for a little while. How many lies do we need to tell ourselves to keep our little nic bitch around! Justification, lies, more lies.
I've wasted so many nights thinking about quitting, beating myself over it, and the guilt of hiding it from my family. Can you imagine my wife having no idea of my addiction and one day telling her that I'm going to die from cancer. Sorry I was so selfish, sorry I left you with the kids, sorry kids your dad will not see you grow up, sorry that the guy you counted on checked out early. Sorry, Sorry, Sorry, and I don't even know WHY I dipped in the first place!
This site has help me realize that it doesn't matter WHY I started, but rather that I am an ADDICT!
Day 17 and going strong on my quit! Thank you brothers for your thoughts, struggles, and inspiration. Its been great to hear the many similar stories. Looking forward to the next day of my quit and enjoying life one day and a time.
Raz79
Brother, we all wish we never put that first dip in. We cannot change the past, so do what you can today to make your future better. Damn proud to be quit with you today!
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I keep asking myself WHY.
Why did I start dipping 4 years ago. Was it due to lack of confidence in myself? Was it stress at work? Was it stress at home with two kids? Was it just fun and I didn't give a fuck? I can't remember!
I used to ninja dip at work for the last 4 years. There was nothing better than having a cup of coffee in the morning followed by some Skoal, Cope, or Grizz (I didn't care, just wanted some nic). It was my routine. I'm a money manager and dip for me was a way to relax and keep calm as markets moved up and down. Like a baseball player, it brought me focus or I thought it did. The funny thing was, I never craved it at home, but at work that was always different. People talk about triggers, my trigger was work! Dip in at 6:30am to 4:00pm, except for lunch. When I first started I told myself that I would just do it for a little while. How many lies do we need to tell ourselves to keep our little nic bitch around! Justification, lies, more lies.
I've wasted so many nights thinking about quitting, beating myself over it, and the guilt of hiding it from my family. Can you imagine my wife having no idea of my addiction and one day telling her that I'm going to die from cancer. Sorry I was so selfish, sorry I left you with the kids, sorry kids your dad will not see you grow up, sorry that the guy you counted on checked out early. Sorry, Sorry, Sorry, and I don't even know WHY I dipped in the first place!
This site has help me realize that it doesn't matter WHY I started, but rather that I am an ADDICT!
Day 17 and going strong on my quit! Thank you brothers for your thoughts, struggles, and inspiration. Its been great to hear the many similar stories. Looking forward to the next day of my quit and enjoying life one day and a time.
Raz79
Don't beat yourself up over the last 4 years. Focus on the rest of your life. You can't change what you did but you can change what you will do and that's quitting and staying quit. Stay quit while you were only abusing nicotine at work because eventually that won't be enough. I use to only dip at work and I did that for around 7 years but eventually that wasn't enough. So I started dipping on the way home or at home when no one else was home, then I started finding reason why I needed to go somewhere so I could lock a dip in and then it snowballed that I didn't care who was around when I dipped- so I dipped all the time. Now I have some white patchy shit on my tongue. Scary shit. Stay strong and stay quit. If you ever go back even once you'll dip more than you did before.
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Man, that coulda been something I wrote when I first quit.
17 days is huge man. Huge!
What I would say to you right now is... Don't look back. Don't beat yourself up. Don't berate yourself. Let go of that baggage.
You've started down the road to a new you. Make THAT your focus each day. Work on THAT guy. The other guy isn't you anymore.
You need another number, want to be held even more accountable, pm me and my number is yours bro.
I hear yea! Still learning that I'm a different person and slowly letting go of the baggage! Appreciate the support!
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Man, that coulda been something I wrote when I first quit.
17 days is huge man. Huge!
What I would say to you right now is... Don't look back. Don't beat yourself up. Don't berate yourself. Let go of that baggage.
You've started down the road to a new you. Make THAT your focus each day. Work on THAT guy. The other guy isn't you anymore.
You need another number, want to be held even more accountable, pm me and my number is yours bro.
I hear yea! Still learning that I'm a different person and slowly letting go of the baggage! Appreciate the support!
Doing good man don't white knuckle it...read read read listen learn take what you need leave the rest. The past is done we quit for today only around here...we promise ourselves first that we will not use then the rest....
need anything PM me.
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Man, that coulda been something I wrote when I first quit.
17 days is huge man. Huge!
What I would say to you right now is... Don't look back. Don't beat yourself up. Don't berate yourself. Let go of that baggage.
You've started down the road to a new you. Make THAT your focus each day. Work on THAT guy. The other guy isn't you anymore.
You need another number, want to be held even more accountable, pm me and my number is yours bro.
I hear yea! Still learning that I'm a different person and slowly letting go of the baggage! Appreciate the support!
Doing good man don't white knuckle it...read read read listen learn take what you need leave the rest. The past is done we quit for today only around here...we promise ourselves first that we will not use then the rest....
need anything PM me.
Keep up the good fight Raz!
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Man, that coulda been something I wrote when I first quit.
17 days is huge man. Huge!
What I would say to you right now is... Don't look back. Don't beat yourself up. Don't berate yourself. Let go of that baggage.
You've started down the road to a new you. Make THAT your focus each day. Work on THAT guy. The other guy isn't you anymore.
You need another number, want to be held even more accountable, pm me and my number is yours bro.
I hear yea! Still learning that I'm a different person and slowly letting go of the baggage! Appreciate the support!
Doing good man don't white knuckle it...read read read listen learn take what you need leave the rest. The past is done we quit for today only around here...we promise ourselves first that we will not use then the rest....
need anything PM me.
Keep up the good fight Raz!
Glad you found us. You can do this!
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Man, that coulda been something I wrote when I first quit.
17 days is huge man. Huge!
What I would say to you right now is... Don't look back. Don't beat yourself up. Don't berate yourself. Let go of that baggage.
You've started down the road to a new you. Make THAT your focus each day. Work on THAT guy. The other guy isn't you anymore.
You need another number, want to be held even more accountable, pm me and my number is yours bro.
I hear yea! Still learning that I'm a different person and slowly letting go of the baggage! Appreciate the support!
Doing good man don't white knuckle it...read read read listen learn take what you need leave the rest. The past is done we quit for today only around here...we promise ourselves first that we will not use then the rest....
need anything PM me.
Keep up the good fight Raz!
Glad you found us. You can do this!
On Day 19 and feeling pretty damn good right now! Still sticking to 1-0 mentality.
Seeds and gum have been very helpful on my bad days and I've been hitting the gym with two a days. Keep up the fight everyone and never put your guard down!
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You are on the right track taking it ODAAT. Focus on today, it's all we can really control.
Each day gets a little bit easier, so subtle that if you keep at it ODAAT that after a while you won't even notice that a day has gone by and you don't think about nic even once.
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You are on the right track taking it ODAAT. Focus on today, it's all we can really control.
Each day gets a little bit easier, so subtle that if you keep at it ODAAT that after a while you won't even notice that a day has gone by and you don't think about nic even once.
Quitting with ya today Raz. The day is almost gone, sleep and do over. We still be here.
Mogul
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Well I'm on day 24 today! I still think about dipping at least 100 times each day. I wonder if this will turn into 50 or 25 the longer I get in my quit, but I have a feeling it won't. It sucks, but I think that nic bitch is something I will be listening too the rest of my life. At least I know, now, how to ignore her one day at a time.
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I'm just a couple of days ahead of you Raz and know exactly what your saying! Been thinking about it a ton lately too. Proud to be quit with you today!
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Well I'm on day 24 today! I still think about dipping at least 100 times each day. I wonder if this will turn into 50 or 25 the longer I get in my quit, but I have a feeling it won't. It sucks, but I think that nic bitch is something I will be listening too the rest of my life. At least I know, now, how to ignore her one day at a time.
Hey Raz. No you're wrong buddy. There will come a day...you won't be expecting it..when you're going to turn around and realize you haven't thought about chew all day. It's going to be a shock when you realize you just spent a whole day without a thought of tobacco, the way you were meant to spend your days.
Not every day will be that way. Those days will be the guiding light, the compass for you to follow when you have the dark days. Those will be there too. Mostly though the good will begin to outnumber the bad. It gets better. I'm at 225 today. Some buddies of mine here are telling me it gets even better on the third floor.
That's the secret of one day at a time. Just like you said. Just worry about keeping your promise today. The good days will sneak up on you that way and begin to accumulate. The bad ones will get farther apart but your promise will always keep you safe as long as you keep that promise for just one day.
Keep your head up Raz.
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Thanks Bulldog, I'm glad to hear that it gets better overtime! Congrats on 225, that's awesome.
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Well I'm on day 24 today! I still think about dipping at least 100 times each day. I wonder if this will turn into 50 or 25 the longer I get in my quit, but I have a feeling it won't. It sucks, but I think that nic bitch is something I will be listening too the rest of my life. At least I know, now, how to ignore her one day at a time.
Hey Raz. No you're wrong buddy. There will come a day...you won't be expecting it..when you're going to turn around and realize you haven't thought about chew all day. It's going to be a shock when you realize you just spent a whole day without a thought of tobacco, the way you were meant to spend your days.
Not every day will be that way. Those days will be the guiding light, the compass for you to follow when you have the dark days. Those will be there too. Mostly though the good will begin to outnumber the bad. It gets better. I'm at 225 today. Some buddies of mine here are telling me it gets even better on the third floor.
That's the secret of one day at a time. Just like you said. Just worry about keeping your promise today. The good days will sneak up on you that way and begin to accumulate. The bad ones will get farther apart but your promise will always keep you safe as long as you keep that promise for just one day.
Keep your head up Raz.
Agree with Bulldog. There are definitely days I don't think about dipping. The 100 day mark (more specifically for me the 110 day mark) really signalled a difference in my craves. Be careful the next few weeks. between days 25-50 my quit group lost a lot of guys. I know I got real tired of fighting so hard everyday during that time. Keep grinding Raz!
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Day 102 here, I'd say I think about dip a few times a day, but definately much less than in the 20's. You got the right attitude in this quit, stay close to here and quit ODAAT, and you'll be amazed on how much less the bitch crosses your mind,
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I'm gonna say what really evolves during this time for you is not THAT you think of it but HOW you think of it. I don't know when, because it's different for everybody, but soon thinking about it won't really bother you. And why should it? You're winning. Even at 24 days you're kicking your addiction in the ass. You've proven to yourself that you have what it takes to overcome. Let the thoughts come... Beat them down every time just like you have been. Like any muscle... The more you exercise Quit the stronger it grows. You really will reach a point when this will not be such a fight. You'll just live your life. At 454 days it rarely drops in on me. And when the thoughts do come... I brush them off and move along. It doesn't own me... I own me.
You. Got. This.
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When we first quit we all tend to drive the life bus with our necks turned looking our the back window.
Eventually we slowly straighten our shit out and rotate our heads to the big windshield and learn to look forward again, with ocassional peaks in the rear view mirror.
Spend too much tome looking out that back window, the higher probability of a crash.
Keep looking forward.
Quit on....
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Currently on Day 25 of my quit. Still packing my lip full of seeds and chewing gum constantly!
She is constantly trying to tell me that I'm a success and that I can quit whenever, "whats one more time!" That's when I back-hand that nic bitch with my 1-0 quit for today mentality!
Fuck off I'm enjoying life for the first time in a long-time!
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Currently on Day 25 of my quit. Still packing my lip full of seeds and chewing gum constantly!
She is constantly trying to tell me that I'm a success and that I can quit whenever, "whats one more time!" That's when I back-hand that nic bitch with my 1-0 quit for today mentality!
Fuck off I'm enjoying life for the first time in a long-time!
Nice quit going here bud! She'll whisper at you forever, always trying new shit to mess with your quit. Don't let your guard down, have a plan when the craves or funk or fog hits. Life is better without her (nic)! I quit with you today, I'm thinking I'll do the same tomorrow. Quit on!
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It's day 26 of my quit. I went to my local 7 eleven which is 1/2 a block from my office in downtown Seattle. This is where I've bought my dip for years. Lately I've been buying gum and seeds at this store, but always with my head down, trying to avoid looking at the wall of chew. I thought, maybe if I looked at it, I might be tempted by the she-bitch!
Today, I finally walked in and stared down the wall of chew. It was one of those Western Movie stares right before a duel. The lady there probably thought I was fucking tard, but fuck it, it was something I had to do. She asked me if there was anything else, I didn't blink, didn't move, didn't stop staring, just said, "NO!"
I bought my gum and seeds and held strong to my quit today. Also, a note to newbies, when buying sunflower seeds stick with David's versus Spitz. My favorite has always been the David's BBQ, I bought the Spitz BBQ today and it was fucking terrible.
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It's day 26 of my quit. I went to my local 7 eleven which is 1/2 a block from my office in downtown Seattle. This is where I've bought my dip for years. Lately I've been buying gum and seeds at this store, but always with my head down, trying to avoid looking at the wall of chew. I thought, maybe if I looked at it, I might be tempted by the she-bitch!
Today, I finally walked in and stared down the wall of chew. It was one of those Western Movie stares right before a duel. The lady there probably thought I was fucking tard, but fuck it, it was something I had to do. She asked me if there was anything else, I didn't blink, didn't move, didn't stop staring, just said, "NO!"
I bought my gum and seeds and held strong to my quit today. Also, a note to newbies, when buying sunflower seeds stick with David's versus Spitz. My favorite has always been the David's BBQ, I bought the Spitz BBQ today and it was fucking terrible.
I quit with Clint Eastwood here.
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It's day 26 of my quit. I went to my local 7 eleven which is 1/2 a block from my office in downtown Seattle. This is where I've bought my dip for years. Lately I've been buying gum and seeds at this store, but always with my head down, trying to avoid looking at the wall of chew. I thought, maybe if I looked at it, I might be tempted by the she-bitch!
Today, I finally walked in and stared down the wall of chew. It was one of those Western Movie stares right before a duel. The lady there probably thought I was fucking tard, but fuck it, it was something I had to do. She asked me if there was anything else, I didn't blink, didn't move, didn't stop staring, just said, "NO!"
I bought my gum and seeds and held strong to my quit today. Also, a note to newbies, when buying sunflower seeds stick with David's versus Spitz. My favorite has always been the David's BBQ, I bought the Spitz BBQ today and it was fucking terrible.
I tally agree on the Spitz brand being crap, David or Biggs (also make Jim Beam) are the best.
I too took time before visiting the regular stop. When I did it they all knew me by name and when I grabbed my drink and seeds I got to the counter and saw my typical order (2-tins Skoal Straight and 3-tins of Cope Longcut) witting there. I smiled and said nope you can void that sale because I am done with that shit. I stared at the tins with pure hatred as she removed them and explained that she was "so sorry".
That is a huge win, risky yet a win none the less. Kudos!
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It's day 26 of my quit. I went to my local 7 eleven which is 1/2 a block from my office in downtown Seattle. This is where I've bought my dip for years. Lately I've been buying gum and seeds at this store, but always with my head down, trying to avoid looking at the wall of chew. I thought, maybe if I looked at it, I might be tempted by the she-bitch!
Today, I finally walked in and stared down the wall of chew. It was one of those Western Movie stares right before a duel. The lady there probably thought I was fucking tard, but fuck it, it was something I had to do. She asked me if there was anything else, I didn't blink, didn't move, didn't stop staring, just said, "NO!"
I bought my gum and seeds and held strong to my quit today. Also, a note to newbies, when buying sunflower seeds stick with David's versus Spitz. My favorite has always been the David's BBQ, I bought the Spitz BBQ today and it was fucking terrible.
I tally agree on the Spitz brand being crap, David or Biggs (also make Jim Beam) are the best.
I too took time before visiting the regular stop. When I did it they all knew me by name and when I grabbed my drink and seeds I got to the counter and saw my typical order (2-tins Skoal Straight and 3-tins of Cope Longcut) witting there. I smiled and said nope you can void that sale because I am done with that shit. I stared at the tins with pure hatred as she removed them and explained that she was "so sorry".
That is a huge win, risky yet a win none the less. Kudos!
Thanks Pinched, I'll have to try the Biggs or the Jim Beam next time!
That is a huge win!
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It's day 26 of my quit. I went to my local 7 eleven which is 1/2 a block from my office in downtown Seattle. This is where I've bought my dip for years. Lately I've been buying gum and seeds at this store, but always with my head down, trying to avoid looking at the wall of chew. I thought, maybe if I looked at it, I might be tempted by the she-bitch!
Today, I finally walked in and stared down the wall of chew. It was one of those Western Movie stares right before a duel. The lady there probably thought I was fucking tard, but fuck it, it was something I had to do. She asked me if there was anything else, I didn't blink, didn't move, didn't stop staring, just said, "NO!"
I bought my gum and seeds and held strong to my quit today. Also, a note to newbies, when buying sunflower seeds stick with David's versus Spitz. My favorite has always been the David's BBQ, I bought the Spitz BBQ today and it was fucking terrible.
I tally agree on the Spitz brand being crap, David or Biggs (also make Jim Beam) are the best.
I too took time before visiting the regular stop. When I did it they all knew me by name and when I grabbed my drink and seeds I got to the counter and saw my typical order (2-tins Skoal Straight and 3-tins of Cope Longcut) witting there. I smiled and said nope you can void that sale because I am done with that shit. I stared at the tins with pure hatred as she removed them and explained that she was "so sorry".
That is a huge win, risky yet a win none the less. Kudos!
Thanks Pinched, I'll have to try the Biggs or the Jim Beam next time!
That is a huge win!
fist pump!
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It's day 26 of my quit. I went to my local 7 eleven which is 1/2 a block from my office in downtown Seattle. This is where I've bought my dip for years. Lately I've been buying gum and seeds at this store, but always with my head down, trying to avoid looking at the wall of chew. I thought, maybe if I looked at it, I might be tempted by the she-bitch!
Today, I finally walked in and stared down the wall of chew. It was one of those Western Movie stares right before a duel. The lady there probably thought I was fucking tard, but fuck it, it was something I had to do. She asked me if there was anything else, I didn't blink, didn't move, didn't stop staring, just said, "NO!"
I bought my gum and seeds and held strong to my quit today. Also, a note to newbies, when buying sunflower seeds stick with David's versus Spitz. My favorite has always been the David's BBQ, I bought the Spitz BBQ today and it was fucking terrible.
I quit with Clint Eastwood here.
Hell Yea!
“Smith Wesson and me. Go ahead make my day”.
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It's day 26 of my quit. I went to my local 7 eleven which is 1/2 a block from my office in downtown Seattle. This is where I've bought my dip for years. Lately I've been buying gum and seeds at this store, but always with my head down, trying to avoid looking at the wall of chew. I thought, maybe if I looked at it, I might be tempted by the she-bitch!
Today, I finally walked in and stared down the wall of chew. It was one of those Western Movie stares right before a duel. The lady there probably thought I was fucking tard, but fuck it, it was something I had to do. She asked me if there was anything else, I didn't blink, didn't move, didn't stop staring, just said, "NO!"
I bought my gum and seeds and held strong to my quit today. Also, a note to newbies, when buying sunflower seeds stick with David's versus Spitz. My favorite has always been the David's BBQ, I bought the Spitz BBQ today and it was fucking terrible.
I tally agree on the Spitz brand being crap, David or Biggs (also make Jim Beam) are the best.
I too took time before visiting the regular stop. When I did it they all knew me by name and when I grabbed my drink and seeds I got to the counter and saw my typical order (2-tins Skoal Straight and 3-tins of Cope Longcut) witting there. I smiled and said nope you can void that sale because I am done with that shit. I stared at the tins with pure hatred as she removed them and explained that she was "so sorry".
That is a huge win, risky yet a win none the less. Kudos!
Yeah been there done that. Freaking other people in the store out by giving a steely faced stare as I approach the register...Staring down the rack of dip....looking like a boxer or an MMA fighter trying to psych out my opponent pre fight. I always felt after walking out of the store I was adding another feather to my cap...Another battle won. Congrats Raz +1 for you -1 for UST, and 7-11
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Day 27 - Got rid of those shitty Spitz seeds and went back to the David's BBQ! Still feel the need to have a big fucking wad of seeds in my lower left gums at least 3-4 times a day at work. I thought of trying the smokey mountain, but I have a feeling that might be too big of a crutch to get rid of later on. I guess I'll stick to my pimp cane, SEEDS, in the mean-time! I still get hit with craves ever day at work and I still think of dipping constantly. A couple of friends at work who dip are helping me with my quit and have been very supportive. Although they are not ready themselves, they want to see me succeed.
Once I get home with the family the nic bitch leaves me alone and its smooth sailing. Probably because I was a ninja dipper and hardly every dipped at home. One of these days I need to come clean about my Ninja Dipping, but I wanted to post up some stats before having this conversation. I know many will tell me I should do it now and that I could use the support of my wife, but I feel confident in my quit and the support at KTC. I have told my close friends and co-workers, so that is a step in the right direction. When the time is right I will come clean and let her know of my addiction.
I will say that I feel more in-tuned lately and I have a greater appreciation of each day! Still exercising a lot and taking my nic rage out at the gym and the treadmill. Using my hatred to do something positive for my health. I can't wait until I work one day and I don't think about packing a terd in my lip!
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Day 27 - Got rid of those shitty Spitz seeds and went back to the David's BBQ! Still feel the need to have a big fucking wad of seeds in my lower left gums at least 3-4 times a day at work. I thought of trying the smokey mountain, but I have a feeling that might be too big of a crutch to get rid of later on. I guess I'll stick to my pimp cane, SEEDS, in the mean-time! I still get hit with craves ever day at work and I still think of dipping constantly. A couple of friends at work who dip are helping me with my quit and have been very supportive. Although they are not ready themselves, they want to see me succeed.
Once I get home with the family the nic bitch leaves me alone and its smooth sailing. Probably because I was a ninja dipper and hardly every dipped at home. One of these days I need to come clean about my Ninja Dipping, but I wanted to post up some stats before having this conversation. I know many will tell me I should do it now and that I could use the support of my wife, but I feel confident in my quit and the support at KTC. I have told my close friends and co-workers, so that is a step in the right direction. When the time is right I will come clean and let her know of my addiction.
I will say that I feel more in-tuned lately and I have a greater appreciation of each day! Still exercising a lot and taking my nic rage out at the gym and the treadmill. Using my hatred to do something positive for my health. I can't wait until I work one day and I don't think about packing a terd in my lip!
Great job saying fuck you to the wall of death. I love Bigs brand seeds. I'm particularly partial to the dill pickle flavor ones. I still pick up a bag every now and then on a weekend. But they were a real life saver during my first 80-100 days.
In any case, early in your quit it's perfectly acceptable to shout obscenities in convenience stores and gas stations. Though it's better if you can avoid them if at all possible. The grocery store or walmart will offer less temptation and lower prices on your nic alternative items (ie: seeds, gum, jerky, candy, etc).
As for the wife. Let her know right away. It's best to be completely honest with your soul mate. I see no rational reason for you not to let her know of your addiction..other than leaving yourself an "out" to return to your affair with the nic bitch. That's the only rational reason for not telling your soul mate of your secret addiction. Burn your boats brother. Kick this quit into high gear.
Regardless, great job so far. Keep the focus. Keep the quit.
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Day 27 - Got rid of those shitty Spitz seeds and went back to the David's BBQ! Still feel the need to have a big fucking wad of seeds in my lower left gums at least 3-4 times a day at work. I thought of trying the smokey mountain, but I have a feeling that might be too big of a crutch to get rid of later on. I guess I'll stick to my pimp cane, SEEDS, in the mean-time! I still get hit with craves ever day at work and I still think of dipping constantly. A couple of friends at work who dip are helping me with my quit and have been very supportive. Although they are not ready themselves, they want to see me succeed.
Once I get home with the family the nic bitch leaves me alone and its smooth sailing. Probably because I was a ninja dipper and hardly every dipped at home. One of these days I need to come clean about my Ninja Dipping, but I wanted to post up some stats before having this conversation. I know many will tell me I should do it now and that I could use the support of my wife, but I feel confident in my quit and the support at KTC. I have told my close friends and co-workers, so that is a step in the right direction. When the time is right I will come clean and let her know of my addiction.
I will say that I feel more in-tuned lately and I have a greater appreciation of each day! Still exercising a lot and taking my nic rage out at the gym and the treadmill. Using my hatred to do something positive for my health. I can't wait until I work one day and I don't think about packing a terd in my lip!
Great job saying fuck you to the wall of death. I love Bigs brand seeds. I'm particularly partial to the dill pickle flavor ones. I still pick up a bag every now and then on a weekend. But they were a real life saver during my first 80-100 days.
In any case, early in your quit it's perfectly acceptable to shout obscenities in convenience stores and gas stations. Though it's better if you can avoid them if at all possible. The grocery store or walmart will offer less temptation and lower prices on your nic alternative items (ie: seeds, gum, jerky, candy, etc).
As for the wife. Let her know right away. It's best to be completely honest with your soul mate. I see no rational reason for you not to let her know of your addiction..other than leaving yourself an "out" to return to your affair with the nic bitch. That's the only rational reason for not telling your soul mate of your secret addiction. Burn your boats brother. Kick this quit into high gear.
Regardless, great job so far. Keep the focus. Keep the quit.
It is normal to have craves and think about being quit a day long right now. You're doing great. Keep battling.
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Well I'm on day today! I still think about dipping at least 100 times each day. I wonder if this will turn into 50 or 25 the longer I get in my quit, but I have a feeling it won't. It sucks, but I think that nic bitch is something I will be listening too the rest of my life. At least I know, now, how to ignore her one day at a time.
Your still on the worst ride ever and your in the thick of it right now. It's mental my friend. Your coming around the corner. At 28 days it's clear your hearts all in. You just have to wait on the brain to catch up.
It's going to be a while before you go through a day with no craves, but you will begin thinking of the poison differently. I started feeling a lot better around day 40. Your doing all the right things so hold tight. One day at a time and you can have back a lot of what the poison has stolen. Never again for any reason and you can keep it. Need some more digits let me know.
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Well I'm on day today! I still think about dipping at least 100 times each day. I wonder if this will turn into 50 or 25 the longer I get in my quit, but I have a feeling it won't. It sucks, but I think that nic bitch is something I will be listening too the rest of my life. At least I know, now, how to ignore her one day at a time.
Your still on the worst ride ever and your in the thick of it right now. It's mental my friend. Your coming around the corner. At 28 days it's clear your hearts all in. You just have to wait on the brain to catch up.
It's going to be a while before you go through a day with no craves, but you will begin thinking of the poison differently. I started feeling a lot better around day 40. Your doing all the right things so hold tight. One day at a time and you can have back a lot of what the poison has stolen. Never again for any reason and you can keep it. Need some more digits let me know.
Not sure when I started having crave free days, but I would have to look through my intro to tell you when I last had a crave at all...
That should be encouraging for you.
The important thing is that you know how to deal with the craves, and every time you do not give in to your craves they loose power.
srans is right: you are in the thick of it now, and you have proven that you can win today. Keep fighting like you have been and you will be free!
PM me if you need
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Well I'm on day today! I still think about dipping at least 100 times each day. I wonder if this will turn into 50 or 25 the longer I get in my quit, but I have a feeling it won't. It sucks, but I think that nic bitch is something I will be listening too the rest of my life. At least I know, now, how to ignore her one day at a time.
Your still on the worst ride ever and your in the thick of it right now. It's mental my friend. Your coming around the corner. At 28 days it's clear your hearts all in. You just have to wait on the brain to catch up.
It's going to be a while before you go through a day with no craves, but you will begin thinking of the poison differently. I started feeling a lot better around day 40. Your doing all the right things so hold tight. One day at a time and you can have back a lot of what the poison has stolen. Never again for any reason and you can keep it. Need some more digits let me know.
Not sure when I started having crave free days, but I would have to look through my intro to tell you when I last had a crave at all...
That should be encouraging for you.
The important thing is that you know how to deal with the craves, and every time you do not give in to your craves they loose power.
srans is right: you are in the thick of it now, and you have proven that you can win today. Keep fighting like you have been and you will be free!
PM me if you need
When I was where you are it was the worst time in my quit. I had survived the storm of the first few weeks and knew I was quit...but the craves kept coming and coming and coming. It's not as hard to fight them off, but you get sick of fighting. What was the solution? Just keep grinding unfortunately. My day 20-40 were bad but they got better after that. This is the bed you made for yourself Raz when you first stuck the weed in your mouth. Embrace the suck!
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Well I'm on day today! I still think about dipping at least 100 times each day. I wonder if this will turn into 50 or 25 the longer I get in my quit, but I have a feeling it won't. It sucks, but I think that nic bitch is something I will be listening too the rest of my life. At least I know, now, how to ignore her one day at a time.
Your still on the worst ride ever and your in the thick of it right now. It's mental my friend. Your coming around the corner. At 28 days it's clear your hearts all in. You just have to wait on the brain to catch up.
It's going to be a while before you go through a day with no craves, but you will begin thinking of the poison differently. I started feeling a lot better around day 40. Your doing all the right things so hold tight. One day at a time and you can have back a lot of what the poison has stolen. Never again for any reason and you can keep it. Need some more digits let me know.
Not sure when I started having crave free days, but I would have to look through my intro to tell you when I last had a crave at all...
That should be encouraging for you.
The important thing is that you know how to deal with the craves, and every time you do not give in to your craves they loose power.
srans is right: you are in the thick of it now, and you have proven that you can win today. Keep fighting like you have been and you will be free!
PM me if you need
When I was where you are it was the worst time in my quit. I had survived the storm of the first few weeks and knew I was quit...but the craves kept coming and coming and coming. It's not as hard to fight them off, but you get sick of fighting. What was the solution? Just keep grinding unfortunately. My day 20-40 were bad but they got better after that. This is the bed you made for yourself Raz when you first stuck the weed in your mouth. Embrace the suck!
When you're going through the shit...keep moving forward.
you're doing the right thing. Lots of victories = winning daily.
You got this.
Fuck nic and all those who promote it.
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Thank you to everyone for your insight. Glad to hear that it gets better, what a fucking battle this is! I know the battle will never completely end, but it sounds like they will occur less frequently and for a shorter duration.
Appreciate the feedback it helps fuel my quit!
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Day 28 and feel great! Probably my best day yet in my quit.
It's great not having to feel the guilt before bed each night, knowing that I still wasn't quit and that I was slowly killing myself, but couldn't stop.
Now days I sleep with no guilt! ;)
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Day 28 and feel great! Probably my best day yet in my quit.
It's great not having to feel the guilt before bed each night, knowing that I still wasn't quit and that I was slowly killing myself, but couldn't stop.
Now days I sleep with no guilt! ;)
Yep, finally being free is amazing! Congrats!
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RAz....
Dude, where the hell are you? Haven't heard from you in like two days. Not exactly how a Sultan rolls. If you've got some issue precluding you from posting, text a brother....
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RAz....
Dude, where the hell are you? Haven't heard from you in like two days. Not exactly how a Sultan rolls. If you've got some issue precluding you from posting, text a brother....
On day 39 - Just got back from vacation with the family at Cannon Beach. Had a great time and hardly thought about dipping. For me its easy not to think about dip when I'm with the family. I've never dipped in front of them and I never dipped on the weekends, just at work.
It used to be on Monday's after a weekend with the family I couldn't wait to get to work fill my lip full of poison. I came back from vacation this time and had no urge. It's great to feel in control again.
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RAz....
Dude, where the hell are you? Haven't heard from you in like two days. Not exactly how a Sultan rolls. If you've got some issue precluding you from posting, text a brother....
On day 39 - Just got back from vacation with the family at Cannon Beach. Had a great time and hardly thought about dipping. For me its easy not to think about dip when I'm with the family. I've never dipped in front of them and I never dipped on the weekends, just at work.
It used to be on Monday's after a weekend with the family I couldn't wait to get to work fill my lip full of poison. I came back from vacation this time and had no urge. It's great to feel in control again.
Is cannon beach on a different planet? One from which you cant post roll? And if so, have you been going there every weekend as you do not post roll on weekends...ever?
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RAz....
Dude, where the hell are you? Haven't heard from you in like two days. Not exactly how a Sultan rolls. If you've got some issue precluding you from posting, text a brother....
On day 39 - Just got back from vacation with the family at Cannon Beach. Had a great time and hardly thought about dipping. For me its easy not to think about dip when I'm with the family. I've never dipped in front of them and I never dipped on the weekends, just at work.
It used to be on Monday's after a weekend with the family I couldn't wait to get to work fill my lip full of poison. I came back from vacation this time and had no urge. It's great to feel in control again.
Is cannon beach on a different planet? One from which you cant post roll? And if so, have you been going there every weekend as you do not post roll on weekends...ever?
Brother. I hope you have also taken the next step in your quit by giving your number to your quit brothers and asking for their numbers in return. Each and every one of them. You are your brothers keeper and they are your keeper. I cannot even stress about how important roll call s. Make sure if you are going out of the loop (vacation) to let someone know you are quit. You brothers need to hear your promise everyday because they care about you. I for one am extremely worried about you now.. Exchange numbers, text your brother your promise. Keep your promise.
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Day 42 - First off I appreciate those that are concerned about my quit and also my no posts on the weekends and vacation times. You are all probably right about this infrequency and how it has caused many to cave in the future. That being said, I think accountability is a big part of everyone's quit, but what is BIGGER is your internal change. I would imagine that the most successful quitters at KTC are not the one's that post a promise every day to quit for others to see, but those who have changed who they are in and out. If you don't know WHY you dipped to begin with then you can't address your true addiction and overcome your fears. Maybe some of you will post for the rest of your life, maybe a few after two years. There have been many who posted everyday and still failed. If all you had to do was post everyday and that equaled no nic, then fucking sign me up brother! My point is that the posts and accountability alone are not what allow you to stay quit from the nic bitch.
For me the changes over the last 42 days has been massive. My quit isn't based off of my fear of death, my family, or anyone for that matter. When I first started my quit it was based on my family and my fear of death, but my views are much different now. Dipping was just a quick fix that allowed me to ignore the bigger issues in my life. My quit is for ME!
Again my goal is not to piss people off or to prove that I am right. My goal is not to say that I'm better than everyone, look I don't have to post everyday. We are all different in how we tackle our addiction. KTC has helped me greatly and for that I'm thankful.
If the infrequent posts are that much of a distraction to my Group, I'm perfectly okay with doing this on my own. For those who are worried, STOP, I have no doubt in my quit! If allowed, you will see me infrequently keep posting larger and larger numbers!
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Day 42 - First off I appreciate those that are concerned about my quit and also my no posts on the weekends and vacation times. You are all probably right about this infrequency and how it has caused many to cave in the future. That being said, I think accountability is a big part of everyone's quit, but what is BIGGER is your internal change. I would imagine that the most successful quitters at KTC are not the one's that post a promise every day to quit for others to see, but those who have changed who they are in and out. If you don't know WHY you dipped to begin with then you can't address your true addiction and overcome your fears. Maybe some of you will post for the rest of your life, maybe a few after two years. There have been many who posted everyday and still failed. If all you had to do was post everyday and that equaled no nic, then fucking sign me up brother! My point is that the posts and accountability alone are not what allow you to stay quit from the nic bitch.
For me the changes over the last 42 days has been massive. My quit isn't based off of my fear of death, my family, or anyone for that matter. When I first started my quit it was based on my family and my fear of death, but my views are much different now. Dipping was just a quick fix that allowed me to ignore the bigger issues in my life. My quit is for ME!
Again my goal is not to piss people off or to prove that I am right. My goal is not to say that I'm better than everyone, look I don't have to post everyday. We are all different in how we tackle our addiction. KTC has helped me greatly and for that I'm thankful.
If the infrequent posts are that much of a distraction to my Group, I'm perfectly okay with doing this on my own. For those who are worried, STOP, I have no doubt in my quit! If allowed, you will see me infrequently keep posting larger and larger numbers!
No No No Sir! You are trying to make yourself sound like a vet right now, and you clearly aren't! The price of admission here is to post roll! That is all man. The method works. I understand the internal change you mean. I had one myself and I knew I would never dip again. But it doesn't mean I don't need help! 318 days in today(100% poster) and I still get up, post roll in multiple groups, and get on with my day. I go back into the site not because I have to but because it always helps me. Yeah I still need to be reminded. Everyone who is still here does!
IT WILL PROVE A GRAVE MISTAKE FOR YOU NOT TO DO THE SAME THINGS AND CONTINUE FOR A LONG TIME COMING!!!!
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Day 42 - First off I appreciate those that are concerned about my quit and also my no posts on the weekends and vacation times. You are all probably right about this infrequency and how it has caused many to cave in the future. That being said, I think accountability is a big part of everyone's quit, but what is BIGGER is your internal change. I would imagine that the most successful quitters at KTC are not the one's that post a promise every day to quit for others to see, but those who have changed who they are in and out. If you don't know WHY you dipped to begin with then you can't address your true addiction and overcome your fears. Maybe some of you will post for the rest of your life, maybe a few after two years. There have been many who posted everyday and still failed. If all you had to do was post everyday and that equaled no nic, then fucking sign me up brother! My point is that the posts and accountability alone are not what allow you to stay quit from the nic bitch.
For me the changes over the last 42 days has been massive. My quit isn't based off of my fear of death, my family, or anyone for that matter. When I first started my quit it was based on my family and my fear of death, but my views are much different now. Dipping was just a quick fix that allowed me to ignore the bigger issues in my life. My quit is for ME!
Again my goal is not to piss people off or to prove that I am right. My goal is not to say that I'm better than everyone, look I don't have to post everyday. We are all different in how we tackle our addiction. KTC has helped me greatly and for that I'm thankful.
If the infrequent posts are that much of a distraction to my Group, I'm perfectly okay with doing this on my own. For those who are worried, STOP, I have no doubt in my quit! If allowed, you will see me infrequently keep posting larger and larger numbers!
No No No Sir! You are trying to make yourself sound like a vet right now, and you clearly aren't! The price of admission here is to post roll! That is all man. The method works. I understand the internal change you mean. I had one myself and I knew I would never dip again. But it doesn't mean I don't need help! 318 days in today(100% poster) and I still get up, post roll in multiple groups, and get on with my day. I go back into the site not because I have to but because it always helps me. Yeah I still need to be reminded. Everyone who is still here does!
IT WILL PROVE A GRAVE MISTAKE FOR YOU NOT TO DO THE SAME THINGS AND CONTINUE FOR A LONG TIME COMING!!!!
A man who gives his word daily and honors it, simply does not and will not cave. This is irrefutable and absolute.
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Day 42 - First off I appreciate those that are concerned about my quit and also my no posts on the weekends and vacation times. You are all probably right about this infrequency and how it has caused many to cave in the future. That being said, I think accountability is a big part of everyone's quit, but what is BIGGER is your internal change. I would imagine that the most successful quitters at KTC are not the one's that post a promise every day to quit for others to see, but those who have changed who they are in and out. If you don't know WHY you dipped to begin with then you can't address your true addiction and overcome your fears. Maybe some of you will post for the rest of your life, maybe a few after two years. There have been many who posted everyday and still failed. If all you had to do was post everyday and that equaled no nic, then fucking sign me up brother! My point is that the posts and accountability alone are not what allow you to stay quit from the nic bitch.
For me the changes over the last 42 days has been massive. My quit isn't based off of my fear of death, my family, or anyone for that matter. When I first started my quit it was based on my family and my fear of death, but my views are much different now. Dipping was just a quick fix that allowed me to ignore the bigger issues in my life. My quit is for ME!
Again my goal is not to piss people off or to prove that I am right. My goal is not to say that I'm better than everyone, look I don't have to post everyday. We are all different in how we tackle our addiction. KTC has helped me greatly and for that I'm thankful.
If the infrequent posts are that much of a distraction to my Group, I'm perfectly okay with doing this on my own. For those who are worried, STOP, I have no doubt in my quit! If allowed, you will see me infrequently keep posting larger and larger numbers!
No No No Sir! You are trying to make yourself sound like a vet right now, and you clearly aren't! The price of admission here is to post roll! That is all man. The method works. I understand the internal change you mean. I had one myself and I knew I would never dip again. But it doesn't mean I don't need help! 318 days in today(100% poster) and I still get up, post roll in multiple groups, and get on with my day. I go back into the site not because I have to but because it always helps me. Yeah I still need to be reminded. Everyone who is still here does!
IT WILL PROVE A GRAVE MISTAKE FOR YOU NOT TO DO THE SAME THINGS AND CONTINUE FOR A LONG TIME COMING!!!!
A man who gives his word daily and honors it, simply does not and will not cave. This is irrefutable and absolute.
42 days and you have it all figured out, eh?
What a crock of shit. What you wrote is nothing more than a long winded excuse for not posting role.
Why are you even here? For a tad of accountability, when it doesn't inconvenience you?
I know why I dipped, and I know why I quit, I know I've changed as a person, but I also know that posting role makes me accountable to others who are fighting the same battle. I'm the total package bro. You're an excuse making bitch who is trying to talk your way out of being accountable.
Guys are taking time to check up on you yet you can't take a minute a day to post role? Not ony that you come back to them with a "I'm smarter than you" retort, like your king quit???
If I was one of the guys who took time to check up on your bitch ass, I be typing "fuck you" right about now, because you basically spit in my face.
But that's just me...
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Day 42 - First off I appreciate those that are concerned about my quit and also my no posts on the weekends and vacation times. You are all probably right about this infrequency and how it has caused many to cave in the future. That being said, I think accountability is a big part of everyone's quit, but what is BIGGER is your internal change. I would imagine that the most successful quitters at KTC are not the one's that post a promise every day to quit for others to see, but those who have changed who they are in and out. If you don't know WHY you dipped to begin with then you can't address your true addiction and overcome your fears. Maybe some of you will post for the rest of your life, maybe a few after two years. There have been many who posted everyday and still failed. If all you had to do was post everyday and that equaled no nic, then fucking sign me up brother! My point is that the posts and accountability alone are not what allow you to stay quit from the nic bitch.
For me the changes over the last 42 days has been massive. My quit isn't based off of my fear of death, my family, or anyone for that matter. When I first started my quit it was based on my family and my fear of death, but my views are much different now. Dipping was just a quick fix that allowed me to ignore the bigger issues in my life. My quit is for ME!
Again my goal is not to piss people off or to prove that I am right. My goal is not to say that I'm better than everyone, look I don't have to post everyday. We are all different in how we tackle our addiction. KTC has helped me greatly and for that I'm thankful.
If the infrequent posts are that much of a distraction to my Group, I'm perfectly okay with doing this on my own. For those who are worried, STOP, I have no doubt in my quit! If allowed, you will see me infrequently keep posting larger and larger numbers!
No No No Sir! You are trying to make yourself sound like a vet right now, and you clearly aren't! The price of admission here is to post roll! That is all man. The method works. I understand the internal change you mean. I had one myself and I knew I would never dip again. But it doesn't mean I don't need help! 318 days in today(100% poster) and I still get up, post roll in multiple groups, and get on with my day. I go back into the site not because I have to but because it always helps me. Yeah I still need to be reminded. Everyone who is still here does!
IT WILL PROVE A GRAVE MISTAKE FOR YOU NOT TO DO THE SAME THINGS AND CONTINUE FOR A LONG TIME COMING!!!!
A man who gives his word daily and honors it, simply does not and will not cave. This is irrefutable and absolute.
42 days and you have it all figured out, eh?
What a crock of shit. What you wrote is nothing more than a long winded excuse for not posting role.
Why are you even here? For a tad of accountability, when it doesn't inconvenience you?
I know why I dipped, and I know why I quit, I know I've changed as a person, but I also know that posting role makes me accountable to others who are fighting the same battle. I'm the total package bro. You're an excuse making bitch who is trying to talk your way out of being accountable.
Guys are taking time to check up on you yet you can't take a minute a day to post role? Not ony that you come back to them with a "I'm smarter than you" retort, like your king quit???
If I was one of the guys who took time to check up on your bitch ass, I be typing "fuck you" right about now, because you basically spit in my face.
But that's just me...
Special butterflies cave and fly away...truth...good luck Razzle dazzle.
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Day 42 - First off I appreciate those that are concerned about my quit and also my no posts on the weekends and vacation times. You are all probably right about this infrequency and how it has caused many to cave in the future. That being said, I think accountability is a big part of everyone's quit, but what is BIGGER is your internal change. I would imagine that the most successful quitters at KTC are not the one's that post a promise every day to quit for others to see, but those who have changed who they are in and out. If you don't know WHY you dipped to begin with then you can't address your true addiction and overcome your fears. Maybe some of you will post for the rest of your life, maybe a few after two years. There have been many who posted everyday and still failed. If all you had to do was post everyday and that equaled no nic, then fucking sign me up brother! My point is that the posts and accountability alone are not what allow you to stay quit from the nic bitch.
For me the changes over the last 42 days has been massive. My quit isn't based off of my fear of death, my family, or anyone for that matter. When I first started my quit it was based on my family and my fear of death, but my views are much different now. Dipping was just a quick fix that allowed me to ignore the bigger issues in my life. My quit is for ME!
Again my goal is not to piss people off or to prove that I am right. My goal is not to say that I'm better than everyone, look I don't have to post everyday. We are all different in how we tackle our addiction. KTC has helped me greatly and for that I'm thankful.
If the infrequent posts are that much of a distraction to my Group, I'm perfectly okay with doing this on my own. For those who are worried, STOP, I have no doubt in my quit! If allowed, you will see me infrequently keep posting larger and larger numbers!
FWIW, after not having a nanoparticle of nicotine in my system for 4+ years, I thought I was teflon to that shit. Nope. Took one false move and a false sense of security (hubris) to bring me right back into the shit. 9 years later, and look at my sorry ass still crawling out of that hole. I get your rationale - hell it's perfectly natural to draw that conclusion once you're feeling so secure. Don't fall into the trap, though. Nicotine + your brain = one seriously long con. Life long, in fact.
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Day 42 - First off I appreciate those that are concerned about my quit and also my no posts on the weekends and vacation times. You are all probably right about this infrequency and how it has caused many to cave in the future. That being said, I think accountability is a big part of everyone's quit, but what is BIGGER is your internal change. I would imagine that the most successful quitters at KTC are not the one's that post a promise every day to quit for others to see, but those who have changed who they are in and out. If you don't know WHY you dipped to begin with then you can't address your true addiction and overcome your fears. Maybe some of you will post for the rest of your life, maybe a few after two years. There have been many who posted everyday and still failed. If all you had to do was post everyday and that equaled no nic, then fucking sign me up brother! My point is that the posts and accountability alone are not what allow you to stay quit from the nic bitch.
For me the changes over the last 42 days has been massive. My quit isn't based off of my fear of death, my family, or anyone for that matter. When I first started my quit it was based on my family and my fear of death, but my views are much different now. Dipping was just a quick fix that allowed me to ignore the bigger issues in my life. My quit is for ME!
Again my goal is not to piss people off or to prove that I am right. My goal is not to say that I'm better than everyone, look I don't have to post everyday. We are all different in how we tackle our addiction. KTC has helped me greatly and for that I'm thankful.
If the infrequent posts are that much of a distraction to my Group, I'm perfectly okay with doing this on my own. For those who are worried, STOP, I have no doubt in my quit! If allowed, you will see me infrequently keep posting larger and larger numbers!
FWIW, after not having a nanoparticle of nicotine in my system for 4+ years, I thought I was teflon to that shit. Nope. Took one false move and a false sense of security (hubris) to bring me right back into the shit. 9 years later, and look at my sorry ass still crawling out of that hole. I get your rationale - hell it's perfectly natural to draw that conclusion once you're feeling so secure. Don't fall into the trap, though. Nicotine + your brain = one seriously long con. Life long, in fact.
Raz,
Just PM'd you, but I want this out there where EVERYONE can see it. You've been given a GREAT DEAL of VERY INTELLIGENT advice here. Folks that know what the hell they're doing when it comes to quitting. For a man of 51 days quit, who has managed to post only 2/3's of the time (missing EIGHTEEN days' roll post), you have an awful lot to learn, junior.
You have a choice....either man up and start posting daily or take your sorry ass somewhere else. You are no Sultan.
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Day 42 - First off I appreciate those that are concerned about my quit and also my no posts on the weekends and vacation times. You are all probably right about this infrequency and how it has caused many to cave in the future. That being said, I think accountability is a big part of everyone's quit, but what is BIGGER is your internal change. I would imagine that the most successful quitters at KTC are not the one's that post a promise every day to quit for others to see, but those who have changed who they are in and out. If you don't know WHY you dipped to begin with then you can't address your true addiction and overcome your fears. Maybe some of you will post for the rest of your life, maybe a few after two years. There have been many who posted everyday and still failed. If all you had to do was post everyday and that equaled no nic, then fucking sign me up brother! My point is that the posts and accountability alone are not what allow you to stay quit from the nic bitch.
For me the changes over the last 42 days has been massive. My quit isn't based off of my fear of death, my family, or anyone for that matter. When I first started my quit it was based on my family and my fear of death, but my views are much different now. Dipping was just a quick fix that allowed me to ignore the bigger issues in my life. My quit is for ME!
Again my goal is not to piss people off or to prove that I am right. My goal is not to say that I'm better than everyone, look I don't have to post everyday. We are all different in how we tackle our addiction. KTC has helped me greatly and for that I'm thankful.
If the infrequent posts are that much of a distraction to my Group, I'm perfectly okay with doing this on my own. For those who are worried, STOP, I have no doubt in my quit! If allowed, you will see me infrequently keep posting larger and larger numbers!
FWIW, after not having a nanoparticle of nicotine in my system for 4+ years, I thought I was teflon to that shit. Nope. Took one false move and a false sense of security (hubris) to bring me right back into the shit. 9 years later, and look at my sorry ass still crawling out of that hole. I get your rationale - hell it's perfectly natural to draw that conclusion once you're feeling so secure. Don't fall into the trap, though. Nicotine + your brain = one seriously long con. Life long, in fact.
Raz,
Just PM'd you, but I want this out there where EVERYONE can see it. You've been given a GREAT DEAL of VERY INTELLIGENT advice here. Folks that know what the hell they're doing when it comes to quitting. For a man of 51 days quit, who has managed to post only 2/3's of the time (missing EIGHTEEN days' roll post), you have an awful lot to learn, junior.
You have a choice....either man up and start posting daily or take your sorry ass somewhere else. You are no Sultan.
I've posted roll at stop lights. On runways. On trains. From bed. On my deck drinking coffee. 595 days in a row. The only people (read this carefully) that cave after about day 40 are ones that don't post roll. Because roll takes the option off the table. If your name isn't in roll, then caving is an option. Caving isn't an option for me.
Don't let it be an option for you. 1 minute a day. 1 minute. C'mon man.
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Day 42 - First off I appreciate those that are concerned about my quit and also my no posts on the weekends and vacation times. You are all probably right about this infrequency and how it has caused many to cave in the future. That being said, I think accountability is a big part of everyone's quit, but what is BIGGER is your internal change. I would imagine that the most successful quitters at KTC are not the one's that post a promise every day to quit for others to see, but those who have changed who they are in and out. If you don't know WHY you dipped to begin with then you can't address your true addiction and overcome your fears. Maybe some of you will post for the rest of your life, maybe a few after two years. There have been many who posted everyday and still failed. If all you had to do was post everyday and that equaled no nic, then fucking sign me up brother! My point is that the posts and accountability alone are not what allow you to stay quit from the nic bitch.
For me the changes over the last 42 days has been massive. My quit isn't based off of my fear of death, my family, or anyone for that matter. When I first started my quit it was based on my family and my fear of death, but my views are much different now. Dipping was just a quick fix that allowed me to ignore the bigger issues in my life. My quit is for ME!
Again my goal is not to piss people off or to prove that I am right. My goal is not to say that I'm better than everyone, look I don't have to post everyday. We are all different in how we tackle our addiction. KTC has helped me greatly and for that I'm thankful.
If the infrequent posts are that much of a distraction to my Group, I'm perfectly okay with doing this on my own. For those who are worried, STOP, I have no doubt in my quit! If allowed, you will see me infrequently keep posting larger and larger numbers!
FWIW, after not having a nanoparticle of nicotine in my system for 4+ years, I thought I was teflon to that shit. Nope. Took one false move and a false sense of security (hubris) to bring me right back into the shit. 9 years later, and look at my sorry ass still crawling out of that hole. I get your rationale - hell it's perfectly natural to draw that conclusion once you're feeling so secure. Don't fall into the trap, though. Nicotine + your brain = one seriously long con. Life long, in fact.
Raz,
Just PM'd you, but I want this out there where EVERYONE can see it. You've been given a GREAT DEAL of VERY INTELLIGENT advice here. Folks that know what the hell they're doing when it comes to quitting. For a man of 51 days quit, who has managed to post only 2/3's of the time (missing EIGHTEEN days' roll post), you have an awful lot to learn, junior.
You have a choice....either man up and start posting daily or take your sorry ass somewhere else. You are no Sultan.
I've posted roll at stop lights. On runways. On trains. From bed. On my deck drinking coffee. 595 days in a row. The only people (read this carefully) that cave after about day 40 are ones that don't post roll. Because roll takes the option off the table. If your name isn't in roll, then caving is an option. Caving isn't an option for me.
Don't let it be an option for you. 1 minute a day. 1 minute. C'mon man.
^^^^^^^^^
I'll second that motion. C'mon man!
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Day 60 - I've been reflecting on my quit the last few weeks. Here are a few big differences that I have noticed.
1) I'm appreciating life! I think in a way my one day quit attitude has me living life one day at a time. Time has slowed down in a way, which is creating less stress in my life.
2) Little things don't bother me as much because the focus is on the bigger picture.
3) Greater confidence.
4) More energy. Since my dipping days, I now work out at least once or twice a day M-F. Just feeling way fucking better and pushing myself physically. Tough Mudder in a month.
5) Spending more QUALITY time with my two children and wife. Not coming home tired and disconnected and just going through the motions.
6) I don't view dip as an "enhancer." In fact, just had my biggest paycheck in my life while quit. Same goes for golfing.
7) I no longer feel guilty before going to sleep or while driving to work knowing I was about to dip the second I walked into the office. I don't have to have that bullshit conversation with myself about how I'm one day going to quit and stop this bad habit. The guilt was always there, now its gone!
8) No more Starbucks latte cups full of dip at work. No more accidentally knocking them over.
9) My FEAR of failure has been replaced by taking on CHANGE and knowing that my best will never allow me to FAIL.
10) I don't think about dipping or the romance effect it used to have. The positives above are then anything the nic bitch ever gave me (Guilt, Numbness to life, Cancer, Disconnect, Shallowness, Laziness.....I could keep going).
P.S. I coordinated a way to post on the weekends now! Thanks for the help MEDIC. Very thankful to the KTC family.
For those just starting your quit, all I can say is that it gets better. Breaking the shackles of nicotine slavery is one huge aspect, but also changing your routines and your outlook will only make your quit that much stronger. Many thanks to those who have shared their wisdom and I was blown away by Broncs Introduction which I read yesterday, great read!
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Day 60 - I've been reflecting on my quit the last few weeks. Here are a few big differences that I have noticed.
1) I'm appreciating life! I think in a way my one day quit attitude has me living life one day at a time. Time has slowed down in a way, which is creating less stress in my life.
2) Little things don't bother me as much because the focus is on the bigger picture.
3) Greater confidence.
4) More energy. Since my dipping days, I now work out at least once or twice a day M-F. Just feeling way fucking better and pushing myself physically. Tough Mudder in a month.
5) Spending more QUALITY time with my two children and wife. Not coming home tired and disconnected and just going through the motions.
6) I don't view dip as an "enhancer." In fact, just had my biggest paycheck in my life while quit. Same goes for golfing.
7) I no longer feel guilty before going to sleep or while driving to work knowing I was about to dip the second I walked into the office. I don't have to have that bullshit conversation with myself about how I'm one day going to quit and stop this bad habit. The guilt was always there, now its gone!
8) No more Starbucks latte cups full of dip at work. No more accidentally knocking them over.
9) My FEAR of failure has been replaced by taking on CHANGE and knowing that my best will never allow me to FAIL.
10) I don't think about dipping or the romance effect it used to have. The positives above are then anything the nic bitch ever gave me (Guilt, Numbness to life, Cancer, Disconnect, Shallowness, Laziness.....I could keep going).
P.S. I coordinated a way to post on the weekends now! Thanks for the help MEDIC. Very thankful to the KTC family.
For those just starting your quit, all I can say is that it gets better. Breaking the shackles of nicotine slavery is one huge aspect, but also changing your routines and your outlook will only make your quit that much stronger. Many thanks to those who have shared their wisdom and I was blown away by Broncs Introduction which I read yesterday, great read!
I will add that you still have some rough stretches of road ahead of you. 60 Days is a great accomplishment, but you still have a few faces of complete shit that you will face. Rage will come roaring back in, you will start to question your own commitment and all of this is only if you continue to stay on this path. Then it really does get better, but you must brace for shit to happen each and every day and use the tools lad out for you.
Life will continue to happen in front of you. It is not the challenges that you face that make the man but rather how you react to those challenges.
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Day 60 - I've been reflecting on my quit the last few weeks. Here are a few big differences that I have noticed.
1) I'm appreciating life! I think in a way my one day quit attitude has me living life one day at a time. Time has slowed down in a way, which is creating less stress in my life.
2) Little things don't bother me as much because the focus is on the bigger picture.
3) Greater confidence.
4) More energy. Since my dipping days, I now work out at least once or twice a day M-F. Just feeling way fucking better and pushing myself physically. Tough Mudder in a month.
5) Spending more QUALITY time with my two children and wife. Not coming home tired and disconnected and just going through the motions.
6) I don't view dip as an "enhancer." In fact, just had my biggest paycheck in my life while quit. Same goes for golfing.
7) I no longer feel guilty before going to sleep or while driving to work knowing I was about to dip the second I walked into the office. I don't have to have that bullshit conversation with myself about how I'm one day going to quit and stop this bad habit. The guilt was always there, now its gone!
8) No more Starbucks latte cups full of dip at work. No more accidentally knocking them over.
9) My FEAR of failure has been replaced by taking on CHANGE and knowing that my best will never allow me to FAIL.
10) I don't think about dipping or the romance effect it used to have. The positives above are then anything the nic bitch ever gave me (Guilt, Numbness to life, Cancer, Disconnect, Shallowness, Laziness.....I could keep going).
P.S. I coordinated a way to post on the weekends now! Thanks for the help MEDIC. Very thankful to the KTC family.
For those just starting your quit, all I can say is that it gets better. Breaking the shackles of nicotine slavery is one huge aspect, but also changing your routines and your outlook will only make your quit that much stronger. Many thanks to those who have shared their wisdom and I was blown away by Broncs Introduction which I read yesterday, great read!
Raz79,
Dude, I am proud of you and your evolving quit. Would be even prouder if you made it WAY PAST the HOF.....which is only a waymarker on the road to quit=dom.
Sorry if I was such a peckerhead, but maybe that's exactly what I am.....a Peckerhead that wants EVERYONE to POST EVERY DAMNED DAY! I don't care whether you're Day 1 or Day 1,000,000....your ass needs to be on roll.
Quit on, brother!
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Day 61
Damn I chew a lot of gum! I've been averaging 4 to 5 sticks a day.
My fucking jaw is going to fall off when I'm older at this rate. I've got to figure out a way to slow this down over time. Main focus is still quitting every day, but need to work on the excessive gum chewing.
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Day 61
Damn I chew a lot of gum! I've been averaging 4 to 5 sticks a day.
My fucking jaw is going to fall off when I'm older at this rate. I've got to figure out a way to slow this down over time. Main focus is still quitting every day, but need to work on the excessive gum chewing.
Raz,
Last I looked, gum chewing never KILLED anybody....
Quit on, brother! Quit with you today, tomorrow, and each day that follows.
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Day 61
Damn I chew a lot of gum! I've been averaging 4 to 5 sticks a day.
My fucking jaw is going to fall off when I'm older at this rate. I've got to figure out a way to slow this down over time. Main focus is still quitting every day, but need to work on the excessive gum chewing.
Raz,
Last I looked, gum chewing never KILLED anybody....
Quit on, brother! Quit with you today, tomorrow, and each day that follows.
Relevant (http://dingo.care2.com/pictures/greenliving/uploads/2011/01/violet-beauregarde-willy-wonka-1971.jpeg), but I digress.
Cherries are great during summer as you can stick the pits in your lip. Fireballs are awesome too.
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Day 61
Damn I chew a lot of gum! I've been averaging 4 to 5 sticks a day.
My fucking jaw is going to fall off when I'm older at this rate. I've got to figure out a way to slow this down over time. Main focus is still quitting every day, but need to work on the excessive gum chewing.
Raz,
Last I looked, gum chewing never KILLED anybody....
Quit on, brother! Quit with you today, tomorrow, and each day that follows.
Relevant (http://dingo.care2.com/pictures/greenliving/uploads/2011/01/violet-beauregarde-willy-wonka-1971.jpeg), but I digress.
Cherries are great during summer as you can stick the pits in your lip. Fireballs are awesome too.
poof.
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Day 74 - This weekend I had my annual fantasy football draft. This year was cool because we decided to have it off site and play golf during the day and then stay at a casino that night. This was something that I've been looking forward to, but at the same time I knew would be a big challenge. I knew the Nic bitch would be all around me.
About 30 minutes into our golf round, one of my old dipping buddies, who I haven't seen in years says "I saved a pinch just for you!". I think I responded in a half a second with a NO. There was no thought put into my response, just a reaction. It almost surprised me how quick I said NO and him as well as he jumped back! After my initial quick reaction I explained in more detail my quit. He didn't press and that was that. In fact, he was happy for my quit after we talked further.
At the casino I was surrounded by cigarette smokers. I was so worried that in my drunken state of beer, fireball, beer, whiskey, beer, gin and tonic, that I would end up bumming a cigarette off some random person or friend while in my retarded state. This too didn't happen. I played a lot of craps, had fun, and never even once got close to wanting a cigarette!
When I woke up the next morning I felt like shit and was way too flippin hung-over, BUT I had a slightly different feeling that helped me power through the day. This hang-over was different in that I had my PRIDE and NO GUILT. This was probably the WORST/BEST HANG-OVER of my life, if that makes sense. This was not only a great trip, but it also was a great experience. My quit is strong and continues to get stronger, one day at a time!
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Day 94 - Its amazing how different I feel from the early days of my quit. I no longer think of nicotine constantly and question my quit. In fact, its some of my new habits that have really helped.
I read recently that it takes our brain 45 days to create a new habit. So if you want to start exercising more during your quit, you need to do it for 45 days before it becomes a good habit. My morning running has now replaced my coffee and dip habit that was my first action of each workday.
I also learned that our old habits never go away within our brain. Its like an abandoned highway that sits ready for an old familiar drive. This is why you can't just have one dip or one smoke. It will bring back your bad habit immediately!
For the new quitters out there, try to find some new habits and stick to them for 45 plus days!
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Day 94 - Its amazing how different I feel from the early days of my quit. I no longer think of nicotine constantly and question my quit. In fact, its some of my new habits that have really helped.
I read recently that it takes our brain 45 days to create a new habit. So if you want to start exercising more during your quit, you need to do it for 45 days before it becomes a good habit. My morning running has now replaced my coffee and dip habit that was my first action of each workday.
I also learned that our old habits never go away within our brain. Its like an abandoned highway that sits ready for an old familiar drive. This is why you can't just have one dip or one smoke. It will bring back your bad habit immediately!
For the new quitters out there, try to find some new habits and stick to them for 45 plus days!
Keep sharing your thoughts and victories on here.
Good stuff:
"I also learned that our old habits never go away within our brain. Its like an abandoned highway that sits ready for an old familiar drive. This is why you can't just have one dip or one smoke. It will bring back your bad habit immediately!"
Also like your story about your FF draft and being hungover without the guilt. I can relate.
Quit on!