KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum

Community => Introductions => Topic started by: CORNWALLACE on April 11, 2011, 10:45:00 PM

Title: My Story
Post by: CORNWALLACE on April 11, 2011, 10:45:00 PM
One of my new buds here at KTC mentioned to me that I should share my story - because I had 15 years of quit and failed 2 years ago with the infamous "just one" - Today is my Day 1. To back up, I dipped cope from 18 to around 32 and then stopped when my wife called me "pathetic" when I settled for a smoke after spending $80 in taxicab fare in Toronto one night searching endlessly for dip in Canada after 8PM (non-existing) - we were there on vacation, I came back to hotel with cigarettes to get my fix - she reminded me that my mother died of lung cancer when I was 21 - smoker - anyway you get the picture - I was humiliated. So, I stopped for 15 years. At 48, thought I could have just one with a new friend - MISTAKE - I am an addict - I can never have ONE - ever. I'm 50 now, married 28 years, 3 kids living in NorCal - life is great now that Day 1 is just about over- I have hope -when I stopped the last time - there was no KTC - all on my own - it is a blessing to have you all in my new family - just wanted to make you aware of my failure - so we help each other to never let our guard down.
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: Greg5280 on April 11, 2011, 11:33:00 PM
Man that sucks, but it goes to show you the power of this addiction!! Get farmilair with the site, post roll and remain active.

Glad you are here. STAY QUIT

Greg
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: southtexasman on April 12, 2011, 08:23:00 AM
Awesome story and unfortunately all too familiar. Stay quit, and we have your back. Head down and power through.
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: Rockytop on April 12, 2011, 02:13:00 PM
Cornwallace, glad you shared your story.
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: bluemtndrifter on April 12, 2011, 02:50:00 PM
Glad you shared, Im on day one been a slave to Cope for 17 years.......
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: CORNWALLACE on April 12, 2011, 03:16:00 PM
Quote from: bluemtndrifter
Glad you shared, Im on day one been a slave to Cope for 17 years.......
Blue - glad to be part of the group with you. we can do this today - I'm here for you if you need any help - and you know how much more experience I have cuz I'm on Day 2! Ha - day by day bro we can do it - corn
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: cane91 on April 12, 2011, 03:18:00 PM
That is truly scary, and a constant reminder. Thanks for sharing.
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: 30yraddict on April 12, 2011, 03:30:00 PM
Thanks for sharing your story, Cornwallace. It will help many quitters here stay vigilant. It will help me stay vigilant. Glad to be quit with you,

30
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: Radman on April 12, 2011, 03:33:00 PM
This will serve as a constant reminder for me that the battle is NEVER over. Thanks for sharing. Let me know if I can help you out any way.
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: bluemtndrifter on April 12, 2011, 09:51:00 PM
Hope your night is good !!!
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: 30yraddict on April 13, 2011, 08:10:00 PM
Cornwallace,

Re: Sleep...Nic addiction has messed with your sleep patterns...It gets worse when you first quit. It took me until about day 10 to get a full night's sleep, by day 20 I was sleeping better than I had in years. Watch your caffeine intake as you will feel more pronounced effects from it.

Keep up the good work,

30
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: Mjollnir on April 13, 2011, 08:59:00 PM
Thanks for reminding me.
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: raven220 on April 13, 2011, 09:13:00 PM
man that's nuts, well just glad you are in my group. we can help each other get pass this shit. hope to be at the end of this with all of you guys. spit free!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 4 day and counting...
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: CORNWALLACE on April 14, 2011, 12:53:00 AM
Quote from: raven220
man that's nuts, well just glad you are in my group. we can help each other get pass this shit. hope to be at the end of this with all of you guys. spit free!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 4 day and counting...
I think the end of this is death - when we finally break free of the daily quit - but hey if you want to hang with me that long - great - I'm in!

Mrs. Cornwallace has advised me that she would like to see what is going on here at KTC - because we have been married for 28 years - I have finally learned to not hide anything from her - note to bros: this is tough, but try to give 100% TO YOUR BRIDES RE: your quit - mine knows my BS a mile away and keeps me accountable - try it - it works!
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: TheMissingPeace on April 15, 2011, 06:46:00 PM
CORNWALLACE, thanks for sharing that. Still getting through day one thanks to all of you. Blue, Raven and Cornwallace: I am in your group and I will be looking for you at roll call every day, I hope you look for me as well. This will be my first weekend in 30 years without dip. But for now, I am just quit today. TMP
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: CORNWALLACE on April 15, 2011, 07:05:00 PM
Quote from: TheMissingPeace
CORNWALLACE, thanks for sharing that. Still getting through day one thanks to all of you. Blue, Raven and Cornwallace: I am in your group and I will be looking for you at roll call every day, I hope you look for me as well. This will be my first weekend in 30 years without dip. But for now, I am just quit today. TMP
It is an honor to quit with you - stay close to this site all weekend - be prepared to die - but you won't - roll call tomorrow - be there - we are counting on you to support us - we will be there for you - Corn
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: TheMissingPeace on April 15, 2011, 10:40:00 PM
Corn-I WILL be posting Roll Call tomorrow. I Have to. I am Quit just like you. We are in this together-Thank God! Cuz I could not do this alone. I am Quit Today. Peace
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: TheMissingPeace on April 16, 2011, 03:40:00 PM
Corn-Saw that you posted Roll Call today-Awesome! I am Quit today with you. Getting through a very surreal Day 2. But I posted Roll Call so today I am Quit. Peace
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: TheMissingPeace on April 17, 2011, 11:37:00 AM
Corn-Here we are, another Day of Quit! Peace
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: TheMissingPeace on April 18, 2011, 11:13:00 PM
Corn-You have been such an integral part of my Quit. You are an awesome Quit Brother. You, my friend, Rock! Today I posted Roll Call and today I am Quit. Peace
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: magnum9 on April 18, 2011, 11:32:00 PM
Grats on your quit Corn.

I promise that I won't use "profanity" (normal conversational pieces in my vocabulary) in your intro forum.

Glad to be quit with you.
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: CORNWALLACE on April 18, 2011, 11:48:00 PM
Quote from: magnum9
Grats on your quit Corn.

I promise that I won't use "profanity" (normal conversational pieces in my vocabulary) in your intro forum.

Glad to be quit with you.
Mag - I respect you and look up to you here - I will never judge you for how you express yourself - I value you most in the way you support and encourage our brothers - I will quit with you every day and support you like no other - no stress on the profanity thing - it is simply something I am working on - Corn
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: TheMissingPeace on April 19, 2011, 11:41:00 PM
I'm in the final lap of my Day 5 Quit. Thank You, Corn. Peace
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: Romandog on April 20, 2011, 08:07:00 AM
Thanks for sharing your story Cornwallace..

Glad to be quit with you, Brother.

Romandog
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: TheMissingPeace on April 22, 2011, 01:07:00 AM
Corn-Finishing my Day 7 Quit and a part of me can not believe I'm saying that. Just 8 days ago I couldn't imagine actually being able to go 7 days without a dip. Hadn't done so in 30 years. Today was good and you always make it better. Thanks. Peace
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: 30yraddict on February 07, 2012, 09:17:00 AM
Cornwallace, bumping this up to remind you why you came here.

Still think you are making a mistake.
Title: Re: My Story
Post by: Evil_Won on December 18, 2013, 01:39:00 AM
Quote from: CORNWALLACE
One of my new buds here at KTC mentioned to me that I should share my story - because I had 15 years of quit and failed 2 years ago with the infamous "just one" - Today is my Day 1. To back up, I dipped cope from 18 to around 32 and then stopped when my wife called me "pathetic" when I settled for a smoke after spending $80 in taxicab fare in Toronto one night searching endlessly for dip in Canada after 8PM (non-existing) - we were there on vacation, I came back to hotel with cigarettes to get my fix - she reminded me that my mother died of lung cancer when I was 21 - smoker - anyway you get the picture - I was humiliated. So, I stopped for 15 years. At 48, thought I could have just one with a new friend - MISTAKE - I am an addict - I can never have ONE - ever. I'm 50 now, married 28 years, 3 kids living in NorCal - life is great now that Day 1 is just about over- I have hope -when I stopped the last time - there was no KTC - all on my own - it is a blessing to have you all in my new family - just wanted to make you aware of my failure - so we help each other to never let our guard down.
Ok noobs, read...

Day 1, day 100, day 3000+, there is no such thing as "just one" for an addict.