KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: BlindSquirrel on August 24, 2010, 01:29:00 PM
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Hi,
I'm 41 years old and have been dipping pretty much constantly since I was 16. I have attempted to quit a couple of times but it hasn't stuck. This time will be the last time I quit because I'm not going back. This morning marked 1 week since my last dip and I will freely admit I hate almost every minute of it.
The hardest part for me is the fact that I am a recovering alcoholic (next month will mark 15 years of sobriety) and I have used dip as my crutch ever since. To be honest, replacing one addiction with another was a good thing for me for a while because the dip was the only thing that kept me from drinking may times. However, 15 years with that crutch is long enough. I have repeatedly lied to my wife and hid my addiction from everyone, and I have hated myself for it. I started swallowing the spit 5 years ago so I could have a small dip in for most of the work day without anyone knowing. In a nutshell, it was controlling me.
I'm not a big support group guy (I quit drinking totally by myself), but I need every advantage I can get to make this work. I look forward to comments, advice, moral support, a kick in the butt, or whatever else anyone wants to throw my way.
Thanks.
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Welcome Blindsquirrel and congrats on your decision.
Head over to the November '10 quit group and introduce yourself.
index.php?showtopic=3664 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3664)
You can also hang out with these non dipping non drinking studs.
index.php?showtopic=93 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=93)
Post up, read, read, read, and get involved. Shout if you need anything.
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BlindSquirrel,
I must say I'm incredibly impressed at your ability to quit alcohol without the help of a support group. But if you "aren't much of a support group guy," what led you here?
If you use this site as it is designed, and summon your incredible resolve against this addiction...you literally cannot fail. We won't allow you to.
I was a 15-year dipper...I've been clean for half-a-year with the help of this site, and I'm loving life today. Send me a Private Message (click 'Inbox' in the upper-right-hand corner of your screen, then "Compose New Message") if you'd like my phone number to text or call for support.
Stick around, use the site...you will succeed.
Mitch (May '10)
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YO Yo Blind squirrel, It can be done and you can do it. I am day 30 QUIT and used the Mint Snuff for the first two weeks pretty heavy, less the 3rd week and even less this 4th week.....fully expect to be done with the mint fake stuff by this weekend.....you can do it no problem if you have decided to stop...i was a 30 year NIC addict......cravings come and go constantly but this thing is very beatable...stay on here every day if possible...ask for help if needed.....this group is pure class man. GOOD LUCK MY FELLOW QUITTER.....
I AM QUIT WITH BLIND SQUIRREL TODAY AND FOREVER.
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As Tony and Mitch say, we are here to support you!!! you can DO this ONE day at a time!!! 30+ Nic addict here and almost 2 years clean!!! You will have a whole NEW outlook on life once you are no longer chained to a can!!! Congrats on the BEST decision you will ever make!!! PM if you need a number for support
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As Tony and Mitch say, we are here to support you!!! you can DO this ONE day at a time!!! 30+ Nic addict here and almost 2 years clean!!! You will have a whole NEW outlook on life once you are no longer chained to a can!!! Congrats on the BEST decision you will ever make!!! PM if you need a number for support
What kDip said. It isn't going to be the easiest thing you've ever done. For me, it was the hardest. Until you go completely nic free, you're not going to feel any better and that crave is going to get harder to resist. Gum, candy, straws, fake snuff are all good things to help with the mouth fixation. Later, you can get off of these or not. It doesn't matter as long as you're not poisoning yourself with nic. We're here for you, but it's time to man up and either quit or keep killing yourself. I won't stand by for the latter, but I'll proudly stand by and be a quitter with you. This is the one time in life when it's a good thing to be a quitter.
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As Tony and Mitch say, we are here to support you!!! you can DO this ONE day at a time!!! 30+ Nic addict here and almost 2 years clean!!! You will have a whole NEW outlook on life once you are no longer chained to a can!!! Congrats on the BEST decision you will ever make!!! PM if you need a number for support
What kDip said. It isn't going to be the easiest thing you've ever done. For me, it was the hardest. Until you go completely nic free, you're not going to feel any better and that crave is going to get harder to resist. Gum, candy, straws, fake snuff are all good things to help with the mouth fixation. Later, you can get off of these or not. It doesn't matter as long as you're not poisoning yourself with nic. We're here for you, but it's time to man up and either quit or keep killing yourself. I won't stand by for the latter, but I'll proudly stand by and be a quitter with you. This is the one time in life when it's a good thing to be a quitter.
Hey Blind Squirrel - Read my post below on day 13. I like we have similar addictions 38, dipped since i was 14 but still drink. I didn't think i would like a site like this but tried out of desperation.....glad i did. Let me know if you ever need anthing or a number and good luck on the best decision of your life.
Feels like a good time to post up on the experience......
I had my second dentist appointment today for a deep scaling and cleaning. Today was the dip side of my mouth and it was quite a bit worse but i actually enjoyed it. Scraping away layer upon layer of chaw tar from below my gum line and flushing it out with an antibiotic - it was like some kind of exorcism.
QUIT 13 days now and feel better today than the last couple. I seemed to be going backward for a couple of days but today my cravings were more manageable - at least so far.I continue to substitute oral hygeine exercises for shoving shit in my mouth or lighting shit and that seems to help. I bought a water pick because i still suck at flossing.
I never, ever, ever thought a site like this would be something for me. I have always dealt with my problems alone - come to think of it, i just never dealt with them and perceived doing it alone. So far everything i have tried, i.e., live chat, reading various topics, PMing a friend, posting in NOVEMBER, chatting with my fellow Shitbags new to the QUIT, listening to the VETS (even the VET CAVERS) is another shingle in my armour against the NIC BITCH - but I am still exposed.
Today is the day our band of brothers takes down the vacancy sign and I have been waiting for this for a while. NOVEMBER FLAMIN SHITBAGS HAVE A SOLID NUMBER TO TAKE TO THE HOF and I will take any caving very personally.
I recently started lurking in some of the other QUIT GROUPS and was amazed at all of the happenings; VETS rooting and counting down the days like aged baseball stars approaching "that hit" and QUITTERS, well into their quit, getting advice how to handle a big trigger event coming up.
Here is what i have learned so far and will apply:
Get Numbers
Have a back up plan and contract
Take what works for your quit and leave the rest.
POST ROLL EVERY DAY
Read a lot
Don't get too Cocky
JUST QUIT
Appreciate you all (well most of you),
Tre'
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Ok, gang. Read blindsquirrel's post in nohappysong's intro thread. He is still on nic gum and patches. Blind, you can do this, but you gotta dump all the crutches and cold turkey this thing. Flush it all, start over day one, December group.
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Instigator - just read your post here. Just posted in nohappydays thread that I ripped the patch off earlier. Don't think I need to start over at Day 1 but if that's how you guys roll here, no problem. In my mind, I'm still on day 7 but I can be day 1 here. Calling it day 1 in my head would only serve to discourage me and that's not going to help. Either way, though, the result will be the same - no more dip!
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Instigator - just read your post here. Just posted in nohappydays thread that I ripped the patch off earlier. Don't think I need to start over at Day 1 but if that's how you guys roll here, no problem. In my mind, I'm still on day 7 but I can be day 1 here. Calling it day 1 in my head would only serve to discourage me and that's not going to help. Either way, though, the result will be the same - no more dip!
That is how we roll.
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HEY MAN, ARE YOU GOING TO POST ROLL CALL.......YOU CAN DO IT BRO!!!!
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HEY MAN, ARE YOU GOING TO POST ROLL CALL.......YOU CAN DO IT BRO!!!!
'impatient' 'impatient' 'impatient'
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Instigator - just read your post here. Just posted in nohappydays thread that I ripped the patch off earlier. Don't think I need to start over at Day 1 but if that's how you guys roll here, no problem. In my mind, I'm still on day 7 but I can be day 1 here. Calling it day 1 in my head would only serve to discourage me and that's not going to help. Either way, though, the result will be the same - no more dip!
Blindsquirrel I came here last year on "day 13" but i was using the gum. It hurt to go back to day 1 too I certainly felt a little deflated.
For a week or so i posted two quit days in my roll call to make myself feel better, but shortly after I just dropped the other one. Sucks but what's a number anyway? Good job on being dip free for x days but you are only nic free for y days (whatever the days are). It's pretty black and white.
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I believe it's Squirrel Out.
:(
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Squirrel,
I'm pretty much in the same boat as you. I'm new to this site ( 2 days), stopped dipping on Aug 23rd. However I'm using the NIC gum until the 29th. That's the day I go for being completely NIC free.
I'm 40 years old, dipping since 13. Beat a cocaine addiction in my late 20's.
So right now I'm not posting roll call because I'm not completely NIC free. I did join the December 100 day group, will start posting roll call on the 30th.
For now I'm just learning the in's and out's of this web site and absorbing all the useful info these people provide.
Brianl
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Squirrel,
I'm pretty much in the same boat as you. I'm new to this site ( 2 days), stopped dipping on Aug 23rd. However I'm using the NIC gum until the 29th. That's the day I go for being completely NIC free.
I'm 40 years old, dipping since 13. Beat a cocaine addiction in my late 20's.
So right now I'm not posting roll call because I'm not completely NIC free. I did join the December 100 day group, will start posting roll call on the 30th.
For now I'm just learning the in's and out's of this web site and absorbing all the useful info these people provide.
Brianl
Brian why not do it today? Why waste another 3 days on the gum? Trust me it's gonna hurt just as bad withdrawing from that shit. Been there, buddy was on the gum for 13 days when i came here. low doses too. DO IT TODAY, you will not regret it.
Planned quit days never work. They don't.
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Squirrel,
I'm pretty much in the same boat as you. I'm new to this site ( 2 days), stopped dipping on Aug 23rd. However I'm using the NIC gum until the 29th. That's the day I go for being completely NIC free.
I'm 40 years old, dipping since 13. Beat a cocaine addiction in my late 20's.
So right now I'm not posting roll call because I'm not completely NIC free. I did join the December 100 day group, will start posting roll call on the 30th.
For now I'm just learning the in's and out's of this web site and absorbing all the useful info these people provide.
Brianl
Brian why not do it today? Why waste another 3 days on the gum? Trust me it's gonna hurt just as bad withdrawing from that shit. Been there, buddy was on the gum for 13 days when i came here. low doses too. DO IT TODAY, you will not regret it.
Planned quit days never work. They don't.
Glen couldn't have said it any better. In the infamous words of Nike... "Just do it." It's too easy. Get it over and done with.
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Squirrel,
I'm pretty much in the same boat as you. I'm new to this site ( 2 days), stopped dipping on Aug 23rd. However I'm using the NIC gum until the 29th. That's the day I go for being completely NIC free.
I'm 40 years old, dipping since 13. Beat a cocaine addiction in my late 20's.
So right now I'm not posting roll call because I'm not completely NIC free. I did join the December 100 day group, will start posting roll call on the 30th.
For now I'm just learning the in's and out's of this web site and absorbing all the useful info these people provide.
Brianl
Brian why not do it today? Why waste another 3 days on the gum? Trust me it's gonna hurt just as bad withdrawing from that shit. Been there, buddy was on the gum for 13 days when i came here. low doses too. DO IT TODAY, you will not regret it.
Planned quit days never work. They don't.
Glen couldn't have said it any better. In the infamous words of Nike... "Just do it." It's too easy. Get it over and done with.
Plus quitting nic does make your cock bigger. Now what man wouldn't want that?
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Squirrel,
I'm pretty much in the same boat as you. I'm new to this site ( 2 days), stopped dipping on Aug 23rd. However I'm using the NIC gum until the 29th. That's the day I go for being completely NIC free.
I'm 40 years old, dipping since 13. Beat a cocaine addiction in my late 20's.
So right now I'm not posting roll call because I'm not completely NIC free. I did join the December 100 day group, will start posting roll call on the 30th.
For now I'm just learning the in's and out's of this web site and absorbing all the useful info these people provide.
Brianl
Brian why not do it today? Why waste another 3 days on the gum? Trust me it's gonna hurt just as bad withdrawing from that shit. Been there, buddy was on the gum for 13 days when i came here. low doses too. DO IT TODAY, you will not regret it.
Planned quit days never work. They don't.
Glen couldn't have said it any better. In the infamous words of Nike... "Just do it." It's too easy. Get it over and done with.
Plus quitting nic does make your cock bigger. Now what man wouldn't want that?
That plus shaving your balls.
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Thanks guys...
But here is the deal. I have a huge party to go to tomorrow, last one of the summer. I know I'm gonna get shitfaced, don't want to dip.
I could lie to all of you and say "ok, i'll stop the gum today", but I know I won't and don't want to play that game. So I'm sticking to my plan and stopping the gum Sat night on my way home from the party. I know it's not the best way of doing things and I'm not proud of it. So look for my post on Sunday when I do my first roll call with 100% honesty.
kb81..... I pissed my pants laughing reading that!!!
KEEP ON ROCKIN' IN THE FREE WORLD!
Brian
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sorry kb81, that was davenc's crazy ass comment
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Squirrel,
I'm pretty much in the same boat as you. I'm new to this site ( 2 days), stopped dipping on Aug 23rd. However I'm using the NIC gum until the 29th. That's the day I go for being completely NIC free.
I'm 40 years old, dipping since 13. Beat a cocaine addiction in my late 20's.
So right now I'm not posting roll call because I'm not completely NIC free. I did join the December 100 day group, will start posting roll call on the 30th.
For now I'm just learning the in's and out's of this web site and absorbing all the useful info these people provide.
Brianl
Brian why not do it today? Why waste another 3 days on the gum? Trust me it's gonna hurt just as bad withdrawing from that shit. Been there, buddy was on the gum for 13 days when i came here. low doses too. DO IT TODAY, you will not regret it.
Planned quit days never work. They don't.
Glen couldn't have said it any better. In the infamous words of Nike... "Just do it." It's too easy. Get it over and done with.
Plus quitting nic does make your cock bigger. Now what man wouldn't want that?
Brian's cell mate!!! This place is about integrity, you honor your word and no one will bag on you! I will be looking for your integrity on Sunday! These boys are correct in saying that the gum does nothing but prolong the suck....3 days and the nicotine is out of your system (via cold turkey)
The rest is just a mind game... so Saturday night when you get your drink on, be sure to come home with your nut satchel, you will need them
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Thanks guys...
But here is the deal. I have a huge party to go to tomorrow, last one of the summer. I know I'm gonna get shitfaced, don't want to dip.
I could lie to all of you and say "ok, i'll stop the gum today", but I know I won't and don't want to play that game. So I'm sticking to my plan and stopping the gum Sat night on my way home from the party. I know it's not the best way of doing things and I'm not proud of it. So look for my post on Sunday when I do my first roll call with 100% honesty.
kb81..... I pissed my pants laughing reading that!!!
KEEP ON ROCKIN' IN THE FREE WORLD!
Brian
I'll take the under , there is always a reason not to stop, and there is always a reason you can start again, your not committed to your quit.
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Thanks guys...
But here is the deal. I have a huge party to go to tomorrow, last one of the summer. I know I'm gonna get shitfaced, don't want to dip.
I could lie to all of you and say "ok, i'll stop the gum today", but I know I won't and don't want to play that game. So I'm sticking to my plan and stopping the gum Sat night on my way home from the party. I know it's not the best way of doing things and I'm not proud of it. So look for my post on Sunday when I do my first roll call with 100% honesty.
kb81..... I pissed my pants laughing reading that!!!
KEEP ON ROCKIN' IN THE FREE WORLD!
Brian
I'll take the under , there is always a reason not to stop, and there is always a reason you can start again, your not committed to your quit.
Wimpy says to Popeye "I'll gladly quit for you Tuesday for a dip today".
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Thanks guys...
But here is the deal. I have a huge party to go to tomorrow, last one of the summer. I know I'm gonna get shitfaced, don't want to dip.
I could lie to all of you and say "ok, i'll stop the gum today", but I know I won't and don't want to play that game. So I'm sticking to my plan and stopping the gum Sat night on my way home from the party. I know it's not the best way of doing things and I'm not proud of it. So look for my post on Sunday when I do my first roll call with 100% honesty.
kb81..... I pissed my pants laughing reading that!!!
KEEP ON ROCKIN' IN THE FREE WORLD!
Brian
I'll take the under , there is always a reason not to stop, and there is always a reason you can start again, your not committed to your quit.
Wimpy says to Popeye "I'll gladly quit for you Tuesday for a dip today".
Man up and quit or keep using the nic. It's black or white, no grey. You can rationalize that you don't need it. What's more important, the party or your life? I done the same thing you did for almost 20 years. How important is that party when you are taking a dirt nap because there was always another reason to quit the nic? You've got some hard ass supporters to help you in your quit. You've also got some people that frown on people that walk the tightrope.