KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: voiceofreason88 on December 05, 2013, 12:18:00 PM
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Hi everyone!
I'm excited to take this step, and quit with the help of community! Below is my story:
First time smoking: shared a cigar in 2005 (I was 17) with an older friend of mind, didnÂ’t really enjoy it, definitely didnÂ’t enjoy the taste in my mouth the next morning! I smoked a couple more after that.
Friends had a hookah – that was much smoother and more enjoyable; I smoked (tobacco only) with them a few times at their place when I was 17 (was also introduced to Seven and 7 at that time).
At 18, I moved out to college. The Hookah bar was expensive, but it was a fun hangout occasionally. I was old enough to buy cigarettes, so I bought a pack one day that was particularly stressful (I was working 40 hours a week and going to school full time). I started smoked 1-2 cigarettes a week; I think I only went through 4-5 packs that year. I didn’t have any friends who smoked, and it wasn’t convenient – so it never became a habit; but I still fondly remember those cold nights at midnight going outside and having a cigarette before my last hour of studying – that combination of the rush and calming feeling felt great!
Fast-forward to 2007, I’m finishing up college, and getting married in a couple weeks. I’m chilling with a friend, having a few beers. He pulls out his can, and I ask if I can try a dip. He shows me how to do it – it hurt my lip and gums a lot; I enjoyed the rush, but it did make me feel sick – I was not sold.
Got married, things were going pretty well, I would still have the occasional cigarette, but probably went through 2 packs my first year being married. We found out that we were pregnant with a baby, due in 2009!
Then it hit: November 2008, I got laid off from my job. That Christmas kind of sucked, but I was optimistic about getting a new job in the new year. After a couple more months of not finding a new job, I began getting more stressed and depressed. I started drinking a lot at night. During the day, while I was looking for a job, I would occasionally smoke to relieve stress. That got old pretty quick, as it was inconvenient to go outside; and my wife hated the smell. The solution? Tobacco in a can.
I used it as stress relief, and went through about a can a month. I chewed off and on while I was looking for a job; sometime 2 cans a month, sometimes I would stop for 2-3 months at a time just because. I finally landed a job in 2010 (the longest/hardest 2 years of my life)! I got rid of the biggest reason for me to chew, but kept the habit.
Fast-forward to today. I have 4 amazing kids (oldest is 4), a great job, and a lingering addiction. I’ve been going through a can/week the past few months. I’ll stop for a couple days when my can is empty, but then I’ll get bored/stressed/happy, and I’ll go pick up a new can. It’s been five years of me doing this stupid thing to my body – I don’t want my kids to figure it out, I don’t want the bad breath, I don’t want the fear of cancer in the back of my mind, I don’t want to look at my credit card statement and see 5 reminders at $5.11 each of how stupid I am being, I don’t want to always have to have an empty bottle on me. I want control of my life, I want to be there to see my grandkids grow up, I want to be there for my wife when we’re old, I want to be the best man I can be, and that means quitting for good! I’m ready and I want it!
Sorry for being long-winded, but it was very therapeutic for me to get this on paper. IÂ’d appreciate your support, this seems like a great place to help each other out!
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Hi everyone!
I'm excited to take this step, and quit with the help of community! Below is my story:
First time smoking: shared a cigar in 2005 (I was 17) with an older friend of mind, didnÂ’t really enjoy it, definitely didnÂ’t enjoy the taste in my mouth the next morning! I smoked a couple more after that.
Friends had a hookah – that was much smoother and more enjoyable; I smoked (tobacco only) with them a few times at their place when I was 17 (was also introduced to Seven and 7 at that time).
At 18, I moved out to college. The Hookah bar was expensive, but it was a fun hangout occasionally. I was old enough to buy cigarettes, so I bought a pack one day that was particularly stressful (I was working 40 hours a week and going to school full time). I started smoked 1-2 cigarettes a week; I think I only went through 4-5 packs that year. I didn’t have any friends who smoked, and it wasn’t convenient – so it never became a habit; but I still fondly remember those cold nights at midnight going outside and having a cigarette before my last hour of studying – that combination of the rush and calming feeling felt great!
Fast-forward to 2007, I’m finishing up college, and getting married in a couple weeks. I’m chilling with a friend, having a few beers. He pulls out his can, and I ask if I can try a dip. He shows me how to do it – it hurt my lip and gums a lot; I enjoyed the rush, but it did make me feel sick – I was not sold.
Got married, things were going pretty well, I would still have the occasional cigarette, but probably went through 2 packs my first year being married. We found out that we were pregnant with a baby, due in 2009!
Then it hit: November 2008, I got laid off from my job. That Christmas kind of sucked, but I was optimistic about getting a new job in the new year. After a couple more months of not finding a new job, I began getting more stressed and depressed. I started drinking a lot at night. During the day, while I was looking for a job, I would occasionally smoke to relieve stress. That got old pretty quick, as it was inconvenient to go outside; and my wife hated the smell. The solution? Tobacco in a can.
I used it as stress relief, and went through about a can a month. I chewed off and on while I was looking for a job; sometime 2 cans a month, sometimes I would stop for 2-3 months at a time just because. I finally landed a job in 2010 (the longest/hardest 2 years of my life)! I got rid of the biggest reason for me to chew, but kept the habit.
Fast-forward to today. I have 4 amazing kids (oldest is 4), a great job, and a lingering addiction. I’ve been going through a can/week the past few months. I’ll stop for a couple days when my can is empty, but then I’ll get bored/stressed/happy, and I’ll go pick up a new can. It’s been five years of me doing this stupid thing to my body – I don’t want my kids to figure it out, I don’t want the bad breath, I don’t want the fear of cancer in the back of my mind, I don’t want to look at my credit card statement and see 5 reminders at $5.11 each of how stupid I am being, I don’t want to always have to have an empty bottle on me. I want control of my life, I want to be there to see my grandkids grow up, I want to be there for my wife when we’re old, I want to be the best man I can be, and that means quitting for good! I’m ready and I want it!
Sorry for being long-winded, but it was very therapeutic for me to get this on paper. IÂ’d appreciate your support, this seems like a great place to help each other out!
Hey 88 welcome. I'm in the march group too and on my day 4. It's hard but you can do it. Dump your stash and post roll. It really does feel good to see yourself getting off that stuff. I look forward to seeing you become a quitter!!!
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!--QuoteBegin-+----/divtable border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'trtdQUOTE ( @ --)/td/trtrtd id='QUOTE'!--QuoteEBegin-- Hi everyone!
I'm excited to take this step, and quit with the help of community! Below is my story:
First time smoking: shared a cigar in 2005 (I was 17) with an older friend of mind, didnÂ’t really enjoy it, definitely didnÂ’t enjoy the taste in my mouth the next morning! I smoked a couple more after that.
Friends had a hookah – that was much smoother and more enjoyable; I smoked (tobacco only) with them a few times at their place when I was 17 (was also introduced to Seven and 7 at that time).
At 18, I moved out to college. The Hookah bar was expensive, but it was a fun hangout occasionally. I was old enough to buy cigarettes, so I bought a pack one day that was particularly stressful (I was working 40 hours a week and going to school full time). I started smoked 1-2 cigarettes a week; I think I only went through 4-5 packs that year. I didn’t have any friends who smoked, and it wasn’t convenient – so it never became a habit; but I still fondly remember those cold nights at midnight going outside and having a cigarette before my last hour of studying – that combination of the rush and calming feeling felt great!
Fast-forward to 2007, IÂ’m finishing up college, and getting married in a couple weeks. IÂ’m chilling with a friend, ha [/QUOTE]
Welcome man. I'm on day 4 and was on the can 23 years. Dump your stash and quit. You actually can do it. No patches no cigs no nada. Dump your debut and post roll with us every day.
It's hard but do like the rest of us and get yourself free.
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Hey Brother, first off, I (and many others) are joyed that you've decided to quit. Being quit here means that you wont use Nicotine in any of its forms, gum/patches etc...
If you are ready to go Cold Turkey, go ahead and start posting roll with the March 2014 group. Check out the Welcome center. Go through the forums and HOF speeches for some inspiration, and start reaching out to the fellow Quitters on the site, they know how to help. I quit with you today brother, dont let the Nicotine crush you. It's a long road ahead. A road that we all are on together, we can lift each other up, or let each other down. Are you ready to make a PROMISE EACH DAY with us that you will not use the nic? That's all we ask here, that you post roll each day and when you start to do that, you may end up like me, trying to encourage whoever i can, when i can. Now lets Kill The Can.
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Hi everyone!
I'm excited to take this step, and quit with the help of community! Below is my story:
First time smoking: shared a cigar in 2005 (I was 17) with an older friend of mind, didnÂ’t really enjoy it, definitely didnÂ’t enjoy the taste in my mouth the next morning! I smoked a couple more after that.
Friends had a hookah – that was much smoother and more enjoyable; I smoked (tobacco only) with them a few times at their place when I was 17 (was also introduced to Seven and 7 at that time).
At 18, I moved out to college. The Hookah bar was expensive, but it was a fun hangout occasionally. I was old enough to buy cigarettes, so I bought a pack one day that was particularly stressful (I was working 40 hours a week and going to school full time). I started smoked 1-2 cigarettes a week; I think I only went through 4-5 packs that year. I didn’t have any friends who smoked, and it wasn’t convenient – so it never became a habit; but I still fondly remember those cold nights at midnight going outside and having a cigarette before my last hour of studying – that combination of the rush and calming feeling felt great!
Fast-forward to 2007, I’m finishing up college, and getting married in a couple weeks. I’m chilling with a friend, having a few beers. He pulls out his can, and I ask if I can try a dip. He shows me how to do it – it hurt my lip and gums a lot; I enjoyed the rush, but it did make me feel sick – I was not sold.
Got married, things were going pretty well, I would still have the occasional cigarette, but probably went through 2 packs my first year being married. We found out that we were pregnant with a baby, due in 2009!
Then it hit: November 2008, I got laid off from my job. That Christmas kind of sucked, but I was optimistic about getting a new job in the new year. After a couple more months of not finding a new job, I began getting more stressed and depressed. I started drinking a lot at night. During the day, while I was looking for a job, I would occasionally smoke to relieve stress. That got old pretty quick, as it was inconvenient to go outside; and my wife hated the smell. The solution? Tobacco in a can.
I used it as stress relief, and went through about a can a month. I chewed off and on while I was looking for a job; sometime 2 cans a month, sometimes I would stop for 2-3 months at a time just because. I finally landed a job in 2010 (the longest/hardest 2 years of my life)! I got rid of the biggest reason for me to chew, but kept the habit.
Fast-forward to today. I have 4 amazing kids (oldest is 4), a great job, and a lingering addiction. I’ve been going through a can/week the past few months. I’ll stop for a couple days when my can is empty, but then I’ll get bored/stressed/happy, and I’ll go pick up a new can. It’s been five years of me doing this stupid thing to my body – I don’t want my kids to figure it out, I don’t want the bad breath, I don’t want the fear of cancer in the back of my mind, I don’t want to look at my credit card statement and see 5 reminders at $5.11 each of how stupid I am being, I don’t want to always have to have an empty bottle on me. I want control of my life, I want to be there to see my grandkids grow up, I want to be there for my wife when we’re old, I want to be the best man I can be, and that means quitting for good! I’m ready and I want it!
Sorry for being long-winded, but it was very therapeutic for me to get this on paper. IÂ’d appreciate your support, this seems like a great place to help each other out!
Hey 88 welcome. I'm in the march group too and on my day 4. It's hard but you can do it. Dump your stash and post roll. It really does feel good to see yourself getting off that stuff. I look forward to seeing you become a quitter!!!
Another victory. USTobacco kiss our ass! 'Finger'
Welcome to hell and the journey to freedom!
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Hey bud, first of all I see that you already posted roll with March 2014, that is fantastic. Great work so far. You have Bulldog and Jdub reaching out to you already which is even better.
The three of you should exchange phone numbers and be a crutch for one another, add more quitters to that list along the way.
Here is some quick advice from me:
- post roll daily, this is your promise to be quit for this 24 hour period
- remember to look and focus solely on today. You are an addict and the only way to eat this elephant is one day at a time
- read all the stories on here
- get to know us, let us get to know you
- find an alternative to dip
* fake dip
* candy
* drinks lots of water
- direct your anger, your family and friends didn't make you an addict, you did, so never direct your anger at them. When you get a chapped ass, come into chat, use the forum, call a fellow quitter. exercise, hit a punching bag, anything but bitch at them
- plan for a bailout, when you get a craving and you will figure out a way to avoid a cave
- avoid triggers (drinking asshole buddies, etc.)
Welcome and quit like a beast today, it will suck until it doesn't.
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Thanks guys - great advice!
The two things I'm most concerned about is
1. lashing out at my family - this is hard, as I only get a few hours with them at the end of the day (at which point I'm worn out already).
2. drinking too much and caving in. drinking is something I need to tackle at another time, but those lowered inhibitions kill me.
I printed off the contract, and have read though it multiple times. It's very powerful. I put it right underneath my credit card, so I'll see it when I pull it out - I think that will really help!
We can do it guys! Remember, it's not the fix of the stress, it's the cause of it.
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Check your inbox (Upper right corner) for a message from me.
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Welcome in bro.
Slow and steady... One day at a time. Break it down further if you have to... 1 hour, 10 minutes, 2 minutes at a time. We are here for you and we know exactly... EXACTLY... What's going on in your body and in your head. It's a beautiful choice you just made. Freedom is pretty damn cool.
Pm me and my number is yours. I'll help any way I can.
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Thanks guys - great advice!
The two things I'm most concerned about is
1. lashing out at my family - this is hard, as I only get a few hours with them at the end of the day (at which point I'm worn out already).
2. drinking too much and caving in. drinking is something I need to tackle at another time, but those lowered inhibitions kill me.
I printed off the contract, and have read though it multiple times. It's very powerful. I put it right underneath my credit card, so I'll see it when I pull it out - I think that will really help!
We can do it guys! Remember, it's not the fix of the stress, it's the cause of it.
I was afraid of hurting my wife (not physically) when i decided to quit. If you feel that rage, go run or exercise, come on here and type and rant your ass off, call/text one of us and blow up. That is a common fear among us, but I think you'll find that the rage will subside for the most part and you'll be happy more than you'll be upset.
you've got my #. Use it when you want/need.
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Thanks guys - great advice!
The two things I'm most concerned about is
1. lashing out at my family - this is hard, as I only get a few hours with them at the end of the day (at which point I'm worn out already).
2. drinking too much and caving in. drinking is something I need to tackle at another time, but those lowered inhibitions kill me.
I printed off the contract, and have read though it multiple times. It's very powerful. I put it right underneath my credit card, so I'll see it when I pull it out - I think that will really help!
We can do it guys! Remember, it's not the fix of the stress, it's the cause of it.
I was afraid of hurting my wife (not physically) when i decided to quit. If you feel that rage, go run or exercise, come on here and type and rant your ass off, call/text one of us and blow up. That is a common fear among us, but I think you'll find that the rage will subside for the most part and you'll be happy more than you'll be upset.
you've got my #. Use it when you want/need.
For the wife and you to prepare (http://www.killthecan.org/community/spousal-support/)
Sit her down and ask her to read this...After you read it. KTC is fantastic but my wife loved being helpful. This short memo helps the quitter and family.
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Thanks guys - great advice!
The two things I'm most concerned about is
1. lashing out at my family - this is hard, as I only get a few hours with them at the end of the day (at which point I'm worn out already).
2. drinking too much and caving in. drinking is something I need to tackle at another time, but those lowered inhibitions kill me.
I printed off the contract, and have read though it multiple times. It's very powerful. I put it right underneath my credit card, so I'll see it when I pull it out - I think that will really help!
We can do it guys! Remember, it's not the fix of the stress, it's the cause of it.
I was afraid of hurting my wife (not physically) when i decided to quit. If you feel that rage, go run or exercise, come on here and type and rant your ass off, call/text one of us and blow up. That is a common fear among us, but I think you'll find that the rage will subside for the most part and you'll be happy more than you'll be upset.
you've got my #. Use it when you want/need.
For the wife and you to prepare (http://www.killthecan.org/community/spousal-support/)
Sit her down and ask her to read this...After you read it. KTC is fantastic but my wife loved being helpful. This short memo helps the quitter and family.
Hey those are 2 great things to be concerned about, and a common way to beat both.....Breathe when things come up and then think about it.
By taking that time and just not reacting to situations, you have the ability to make a conscious decision for the better.
And a great decision is to hop on this site or give one of your brothers here a call or a text. As we all can relate.
Standing right beside you in quit.....
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I am a stay at home dad with a 10 month old son and sometimes I wish I could be gone as to not have as many opportunities to lash out at him. Thankfully my wife works from home and can relieve me, just tell yourself like I do when you feel your entire body tensing up, you asked them to be here and you were the idiot who got addicted to something so calm the fuck down.
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Missed two days of roll, how is it going my man?
Have you noticed that contract behind your credit card in the past few days?
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Missed two days of roll, how is it going my man?
Have you noticed that contract behind your credit card in the past few days?
Thanks for checking in - my weekends offer much fewer chances to log on and post roll. The quit is going alright - day 16 and no nicotine. Been feeling really stressed and a little depressed this week, but I really don't think a dip is going to solve anything (although my brain is telling my it will).
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Hey 88. I'm right there with you. Except i'm only 1 week in (Day 6). If you ever need to talk let me know. PM me for my cell. I could use the support too. I was a can a week guy for the past two years. thought it wouldn't be hard to quit as i wasn't as addicted as others i knew. I was wrong.
-Woody.
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Not sure if anyone will see this... but oh well.
I'm on day 56, and it's been going pretty well - I feel like it's habit now for me not to chew, so I've just been cruising through. Not that's it's been easy, just habit.
Anyway - I'm getting a little worried. I have a business trip coming up in a few weeks, and I keep catching myself fantasizing about getting a can of dip or pack of smokes while I'm there.
I'm telling myself:
"I'll be 80 days quit at that point - I've got it down now."
"I won't have any when I get back - it's a one-time thing."
"What else am I going to do there without my wife/kids?"
"I deserve a break."
Any advice/encouragement?
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Not sure if anyone will see this... but oh well.
I'm on day 56, and it's been going pretty well - I feel like it's habit now for me not to chew, so I've just been cruising through. Not that's it's been easy, just habit.
Anyway - I'm getting a little worried. I have a business trip coming up in a few weeks, and I keep catching myself fantasizing about getting a can of dip or pack of smokes while I'm there.
I'm telling myself:
"I'll be 80 days quit at that point - I've got it down now."
"I won't have any when I get back - it's a one-time thing."
"What else am I going to do there without my wife/kids?"
"I deserve a break."
Any advice/encouragement?
It's great that you are thinking ahead and planning how to protect your quit. Nice work. I posted about my first trip. It went ok, and I just used my tools- access to the site here when possible, plenty of gum, candy, jerky, etc packed away where i had easy access. I walked a lot, explored, for entertainment and sanity when there was "down" time.
My best advice is consider enjoying what can be enjoyed about not dipping on this trip- for me, i really noticed how relieved I was of all the work that chewing on the road required. Not worried about supply, now worried about slipping away, keepign a can in a hidden pocket, where to spit, when to find time, making up trips to the bathrooom to get a quick fix, etc. If you can take a little change in perspective, to where you are prepared to battle the craves if they come but where you are also taking note of the good things that happen with this new life of freedom you are creating, you might find it to be a really rewarding thing to be proud of when the trip is over. You are sure to score some victories over some triggers, making future trips that much easier too.
Best of luck- and be sure and have your supporters in line too, so you can reach out if all else fails.
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Not sure if anyone will see this... but oh well.
"I'll be 80 days quit at that point - I've got it down now."
"I won't have any when I get back - it's a one-time thing."
"What else am I going to do there without my wife/kids?"
"I deserve a break."
Any advice/encouragement?
I see you brother. We are all here.
My advice? Post roll early in the morning and promise not to use nicotine. Then keep your promise.
"I'll be 80 days quit at that point - I've got it down now."
-Wrong. You will never have it down. Neither will I. Stay vigilant! Look at all the vets with 1000+ days. They don't have it down and never will.
"I won't have any when I get back - it's a one-time thing."
- I know that trick all too well. It don't work man. You know that. Its never a one time thing.
"What else am I going to do there without my wife/kids?"
- Watch porn? Exercise? I don't know...there is a lot to do that doesn't involve putting poison in your mouth
"I deserve a break."
- No you don't. You do not deserve a break. Don't take one. You deserve to watch your children grow up.
PB
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Not sure if anyone will see this... but oh well.
I'm on day 56, and it's been going pretty well - I feel like it's habit now for me not to chew, so I've just been cruising through. Not that's it's been easy, just habit.
Anyway - I'm getting a little worried. I have a business trip coming up in a few weeks, and I keep catching myself fantasizing about getting a can of dip or pack of smokes while I'm there.
I'm telling myself:
"I'll be 80 days quit at that point - I've got it down now."
"I won't have any when I get back - it's a one-time thing."
"What else am I going to do there without my wife/kids?"
"I deserve a break."
Any advice/encouragement?
Plan your quit accordingly. Normally eat on the run while on business travel, take yourself out for a good steak (my preference); normally go to the gym after work, call a gym up there and explain you are going to be traveling an would like a couple of day passes and don't break your routine (YMCA's - I work for a large Association in Pittsburgh are great for this), find some local attraction to go to after hours avoid sitting around thinking about everything you listed. That's the nic bitch talking....your quit is not geographically dependent!!! You have one hell of a quit going on...awesome planning ahead but it is still ODAAT. Make sure you have your contacts and post roll everyday, even if it has to be via txt....and everything everyone said before me!!! You will hammer through!
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Not sure if anyone will see this... but oh well.
I'm on day 56, and it's been going pretty well - I feel like it's habit now for me not to chew, so I've just been cruising through. Not that's it's been easy, just habit.
Anyway - I'm getting a little worried. I have a business trip coming up in a few weeks, and I keep catching myself fantasizing about getting a can of dip or pack of smokes while I'm there.
I'm telling myself:
"I'll be 80 days quit at that point - I've got it down now."
"I won't have any when I get back - it's a one-time thing."
"What else am I going to do there without my wife/kids?"
"I deserve a break."
Any advice/encouragement?
Excellent post! Thanks for sharing and well done.
First of all, the nic bitch just tried to have a private conversation with you. Her aim? To get you to get nicotine for her. She relies on you to get nic. She has no power of choice. Only you have free will, the power of choice. You chose to make her "private" conversation public, well done!
Make sure you post roll early that day. Get on the KTC site that day and help one or two new quitters. Bring some digists in case you need to call someone. Kick her in the face. She is a lying evil witch.
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Thanks guys for all the advice - really great stuff. I'm definitely going to come back here and re-read this right before I leave town and when I get there.
Staying strong with you guys!
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Not sure if anyone will see this... but oh well.
I'm on day 56, and it's been going pretty well - I feel like it's habit now for me not to chew, so I've just been cruising through. Not that's it's been easy, just habit.
Anyway - I'm getting a little worried. I have a business trip coming up in a few weeks, and I keep catching myself fantasizing about getting a can of dip or pack of smokes while I'm there.
I'm telling myself:
"I'll be 80 days quit at that point - I've got it down now."
"I won't have any when I get back - it's a one-time thing."
"What else am I going to do there without my wife/kids?"
"I deserve a break."
Any advice/encouragement?
Last time I stopped dipping before I quit was Jan. 2011. I patched myself down over 6 weeks starting Jan. 1st, and was nicotine free from mid-end Feb. 2011 all the way into May 2011. I then went on a vacation with my wife and we went out to some awesome steakhouses over the 3 days we were away. Last night we went to a Brazilian steakhouse and I got the meat sweats. I had a few cocktails too, and I had a huge crave for dip. I decided that I had this quitting thing down, and that I could quit whenever I wanted to so why not have a dip? I had no KTC at that time, no promise not to use for the day, no people I would be letting down, no support system, but I still had the power to dip or not. I told myself I would have just 1 dip and toss the rest of the can. I went out bought a can of poison, had a fat wad of shit in my mouth and hated myself. I never did flush the rest of the can. Took me 2 years before I got my head out of my ass again, and I do not think I would be quit if I had not found KTC. Do not plan your cave. You do not have this quitting thing down if you cave. You will be a slave again if you cave. If you retread right away that cave will not make it all better for you. Stay strong, this quit of yours will suck until it doesn't (Paraphrasing Skoal Monster I think), but if you go back to day 1 you are only prolonging your pain. You are so close to better days. The suck won't go away by caving, only by quitting.
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Not sure if anyone will see this... but oh well.
I'm on day 56, and it's been going pretty well - I feel like it's habit now for me not to chew, so I've just been cruising through. Not that's it's been easy, just habit.
Anyway - I'm getting a little worried. I have a business trip coming up in a few weeks, and I keep catching myself fantasizing about getting a can of dip or pack of smokes while I'm there.
I'm telling myself:
"I'll be 80 days quit at that point - I've got it down now."
"I won't have any when I get back - it's a one-time thing."
"What else am I going to do there without my wife/kids?"
"I deserve a break."
Any advice/encouragement?
Last time I stopped dipping before I quit was Jan. 2011. I patched myself down over 6 weeks starting Jan. 1st, and was nicotine free from mid-end Feb. 2011 all the way into May 2011. I then went on a vacation with my wife and we went out to some awesome steakhouses over the 3 days we were away. Last night we went to a Brazilian steakhouse and I got the meat sweats. I had a few cocktails too, and I had a huge crave for dip. I decided that I had this quitting thing down, and that I could quit whenever I wanted to so why not have a dip? I had no KTC at that time, no promise not to use for the day, no people I would be letting down, no support system, but I still had the power to dip or not. I told myself I would have just 1 dip and toss the rest of the can. I went out bought a can of poison, had a fat wad of shit in my mouth and hated myself. I never did flush the rest of the can. Took me 2 years before I got my head out of my ass again, and I do not think I would be quit if I had not found KTC. Do not plan your cave. You do not have this quitting thing down if you cave. You will be a slave again if you cave. If you retread right away that cave will not make it all better for you. Stay strong, this quit of yours will suck until it doesn't (Paraphrasing Skoal Monster I think), but if you go back to day 1 you are only prolonging your pain. You are so close to better days. The suck won't go away by caving, only by quitting.
Ah, looks like you are transitioning from the ragin' craves to the nic whispers in the ear. Both are dangerous, but the whispers are far more subtle. Both are easily handled if you use your tools.
My advice is to double down on your accountability. If what you are doing has become habit, time to add some more and new layers. Get some more numbers, post with more than just your HOF group, spread your accountability out there. Get on this site when you are on business travel. Post/chat what is going on for you. Most of us worried and/or struggled on our first business trips away from home and family. That use to be prime dip indulge time for many of us.
Plan ahead, make sure you have alternatives (seeds, fake, whatever you use). I bet you will find if you prepare then the actual event will far easier than you imagined.
You got this, you been here long enough to use the tools...
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Not sure if anyone will see this... but oh well.
I'm on day 56, and it's been going pretty well - I feel like it's habit now for me not to chew, so I've just been cruising through. Not that's it's been easy, just habit.
Anyway - I'm getting a little worried. I have a business trip coming up in a few weeks, and I keep catching myself fantasizing about getting a can of dip or pack of smokes while I'm there.
I'm telling myself:
"I'll be 80 days quit at that point - I've got it down now."
"I won't have any when I get back - it's a one-time thing."
"What else am I going to do there without my wife/kids?"
"I deserve a break."
Any advice/encouragement?
I see you buddy. I was going to try to post some really deep shit but pbrain was right on target.
Your kids deserve to have you see them grow up. No breaks. You're an addict for life homey.
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Any advice/encouragement?
I got some. Listen to pbrain. I just have a little to add. Enjoy the trip! Do something while your there. Time to start enjoying your life without the poison my friend. Don't need it,, never did!