KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: JakeH on June 09, 2012, 01:55:00 AM
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Hello my name is Jake,
I have been dipping for the last 7 years and I am tired of failed attempts at quitting. So, I decided that it is time that I tried something new. So I have set a date, for this Sunday to throw out whatever I have left. Im so tired of trying, trying for a day or two maybe three, then caving. I have had opportunities in the past where I have made it a couple weeks, but in truth it doesn't seem like I have that strength anymore. I dont assume that by joining this website I will suddenly find the power to never again dip, but only that this site and the people in it might be a catalyst or the new difference that could make this time work.
I am so sick of my dipping, the fear of it, what it can do and is doing to me. So much so that I am ashamed of my habit, I dont do it in front of others and I dont talk about it either, my loved ones and those close to me are aware I dip, but are either convinced I am stopping, or love me to much to hassle me about it. This had made it my dirty little secret, and it has also made it so that I am my only support.
I hope I can do it,
Thank you.
oh and it should say INTRO at the top..
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Welcome Jake-also super new...just a heads up on your post-you better just throw out all your dip now. No point in waiting-get rid of it. You may not get the responses youre looking for Until this happens. As for alturnitives I've heard good things about hooch snuff and ordered some for myself. Dipped cope for 12-13 yrs. once you commit to quiting-you receive more support imaginable from complete strangers-it's awesome. Flush it, join September 2012 group and post roll tomorrow -we'll go through first Saturday w/out dip together.
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Im in.
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All Right Jake!
Spend a little time on the site - then get some sleep. When you wake up in the morning, I would post again. I want you to only concentrate on staying quit for tomorrow only. You can do that. My 5 y/o held his shit for 5 days one time. Surely, you can make 1 day w/o a gagger. Hour by hour. Spend all day on this site reading, reading, and reading. Make contact with Cubsball13 there. Bet that fucker is loyal as hell to be a cubs' fan.
Congratulations.
I'll quit with you today.
Vadge - day 148; QLF
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Im in.
Well Done Jake:
Listen to vadge. He is a bad ass quitter. I llove that it took one guy telling you to throw that shit out and you did it. sounds to me like somebody named JakeH really, really, wants to get out of the hell hole that is addiction.
read everything you can on this site. Post roll and worry about today. tomorrow will take care of itself.
A couple of things a newbie should know. Don't miss posting roll. People don't take kindly to that. People here are serious because they are fighting for their lives and they know, whether you do ro not, that you are too. The next few days are gonna suck. The only way to get through them is ONE DAY AT A TIME.
Post roll. suck it up until bed time. then do it again.
Stay strong Jake. You can do this. You got this shit man!! I love the quit you got goin on brother!
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Listen to Vadge and Rangy they are really wise!! You might have bowel problems, Pray you don't have to wait 5 days.
Pick the attitude up alittle, quit HOPING! JUST QUIT
Another thing it isn't a HABIT it is an ADDICTION
YOU ARE A ADDICT! WE ALL ARE, NEVER FORGET IT!
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Thanks guys. Past my morning dip, next is while working. Saturdays are usually one of my heaviest days dipping. Forget one day at a time, I'm going by the fucking hour.
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Thanks guys. Past my morning dip, next is while working. Saturdays are usually one of my heaviest days dipping. Forget one day at a time, I'm going by the fucking hour.
Its a tough battle bud but I will tell you well worth it!
Keep your mind elsewhere for these first few tough bad days....
Stay focused, strong, quit!
QLF one day hour minute or second at a time!
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My man! Yeah saturdays blow! Glad to see you this morning! Fight that bitch! I've taken 2 walks already this morning. Finding myself looking at the clock a lot today...for some reason.
Thanks guys. Past my morning dip, next is while working. Saturdays are usually one of my heaviest days dipping. Forget one day at a time, I'm going by the fucking hour.
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Thanks guys. Past my morning dip, next is while working. Saturdays are usually one of my heaviest days dipping. Forget one day at a time, I'm going by the fucking hour.
Its a tough battle bud but I will tell you well worth it!
Keep your mind elsewhere for these first few tough bad days....
Stay focused, strong, quit!
QLF one day hour minute or second at a time!
Saturday is just another day I get to tell the nic bitch to go fuck herself. If the craves get bad get you some seeds or some fake shit. Think of each crave as a battle with the nic bitch, don't let her win.
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Thanks guys. Past my morning dip, next is while working. Saturdays are usually one of my heaviest days dipping. Forget one day at a time, I'm going by the fucking hour.
I feel your pain. I only work on weekends and Sat and Sun were very heavy chew days for me, sometimes 2 cans day heavy if I was completely bored. I'm 14 days quit and let me tell you the shit you are going through right now gets easier and it is well worth the freedom that you will enjoy once the bitch no longer controls you. Stay strong, drink lots of water and get into chat to pass some time
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Thanks guys. Past my morning dip, next is while working. Saturdays are usually one of my heaviest days dipping. Forget one day at a time, I'm going by the fucking hour.
Its a tough battle bud but I will tell you well worth it!
Keep your mind elsewhere for these first few tough bad days....
Stay focused, strong, quit!
QLF one day hour minute or second at a time!
Saturday is just another day I get to tell the nic bitch to go fuck herself. If the craves get bad get you some seeds or some fake shit. Think of each crave as a battle with the nic bitch, don't let her win.
I'm with Bruce everyday is just the same: another chance to be victorious against the bitch. Freedom is gained by winning the war we are in against Tabacco! Each victory over a crave, a trigger smashed, or day you succeed is a battle won. Win all your battles and eventially the enemy will lose control over you and you WIN THE WAR!
Just remember you didn't become the enslaved addict that you are overnight.
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I failed. I took it out after only a minute but I failed. So much for throwing the shit away, I dug it out of the trash. Its down in the shitter now, but I didnt even use the chat. FUCK!
I just got some Smokey mountain stuff, which is why I wanted to wait till tomorrow, but I have it now so hopefully I can trick my brain for a bit next time. I suppose im supposed to post roll again as day one tomorrow, along with smashing my head into a wall for being a dumbass. Sorry guys I failed you, but not again damnit.
'bang head'
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I failed. I took it out after only a minute but I failed. So much for throwing the shit away, I dug it out of the trash. Its down in the shitter now, but I didnt even use the chat. FUCK!
I just got some Smokey mountain stuff, which is why I wanted to wait till tomorrow, but I have it now so hopefully I can trick my brain for a bit next time. I suppose im supposed to post roll again as day one tomorrow, along with smashing my head into a wall for being a dumbass. Sorry guys I failed you, but not again damnit.
'bang head'
c'mon bro.......you are stronger than that.....WTF???
First - don't throw it away - pour it out.......
Second - not sure how to deal with this and know if you are serious.....will let some of the other boys chime in....
And brace yourself, cuz I am sure the pain may be headed your way
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I failed. I took it out after only a minute but I failed. So much for throwing the shit away, I dug it out of the trash. Its down in the shitter now, but I didn't even use the chat. FUCK!
I just got some Smokey mountain stuff, which is why I wanted to wait till tomorrow, but I have it now so hopefully I can trick my brain for a bit next time. I suppose i'm supposed to post roll again as day one tomorrow, along with smashing my head into a wall for being a dumbass. Sorry guys I failed you, but not again dammit.
'bang head'
c'mon bro.......you are stronger than that.....WTF???
First - don't throw it away - pour it out.......
Second - not sure how to deal with this and know if you are serious.....will let some of the other boys chime in....
And brace yourself, cuz I am sure the pain may be headed your way
Don't try to blame it on planning to wait till tomorrow! Either You want this or you don't! If you want it you'll quit. If you don't leave. It is as simple as that. I had true faith in your quit and had just dropped you my # use it next time. Repeating day 1 like ground hog day is totally unacceptable. A Promise is a promise, I take mine serious and I expect you to also!
As far as hoping to trick your brain. FUCK THAT you already proved that the hold that the nic bitch has on your brain is alot stronger than you! We don't hope, wish luck or try around here we just QUIT!
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I failed. I took it out after only a minute but I failed. So much for throwing the shit away, I dug it out of the trash. Its down in the shitter now, but I didn't even use the chat. FUCK!
I just got some Smokey mountain stuff, which is why I wanted to wait till tomorrow, but I have it now so hopefully I can trick my brain for a bit next time. I suppose i'm supposed to post roll again as day one tomorrow, along with smashing my head into a wall for being a dumbass. Sorry guys I failed you, but not again dammit.
'bang head'
c'mon bro.......you are stronger than that.....WTF???
First - don't throw it away - pour it out.......
Second - not sure how to deal with this and know if you are serious.....will let some of the other boys chime in....
And brace yourself, cuz I am sure the pain may be headed your way
Don't try to blame it on planning to wait till tomorrow! Either You want this or you don't! If you want it you'll quit. If you don't leave. It is as simple as that. I had true faith in your quit and had just dropped you my # use it next time. Repeating day 1 like ground hog day is totally unacceptable. A Promise is a promise, I take mine serious and I expect you to also!
As far as hoping to trick your brain. FUCK THAT you already proved that the hold that the nic bitch has on your brain is alot stronger than you! We don't hope, wish luck or try around here we just QUIT!
Knew WT would get in the game.....
Dude - here is the deal......flush your shit......
and brace yourself for a very nasty 3 days that you will remember for the rest of your life.....
Or do whatw WT said and leave.....there are some serious bad ass mother fucker quitters here
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I need the pain, I need to know that I failed and I suck, that I dont deserve the right and must earn it. I need this because I am stronger than it, the bitch wont beat me, I wont let it. The bitch is a stupid plant, I am me, I wont let it run my life anymore, I wont let it twist me, make me weak, or dependent on it. I am in control of my body, my mind, and my actions. Nothing can influence me without my consent. And I am done, I am quit for life.
This is my creed
And I say this creed to KTC because you wont accept it, you wont believe it, and you cannot trust me saying it. I have nothing to weigh myself against for you. Up to this point the bitch has won me. the bitch has taken my life, pushed aside my fiancee, chosen my friends, and controlled my time. How could you believe me, why would you?
I will earn my creed, I will make it true. One day, hour, minute, second, at a time. Not for anyone but me, for first I must show myself that I am worthy of my own respect.
It is 7:51 P.M. central time, on June 9th
I am not dipping, and I have no dip in my place.
This was my last mistake and this is my first day.
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I need the pain, I need to know that I failed and I suck, that I dont deserve the right and must earn it. I need this because I am stronger than it, the bitch wont beat me, I wont let it. The bitch is a stupid plant, I am me, I wont let it run my life anymore, I wont let it twist me, make me weak, or dependent on it. I am in control of my body, my mind, and my actions. Nothing can influence me without my consent. And I am done, I am quit for life.
This is my creed
And I say this creed to KTC because you wont accept it, you wont believe it, and you cannot trust me saying it. I have nothing to weigh myself against for you. Up to this point the bitch has won me. the bitch has taken my life, pushed aside my fiancee, chosen my friends, and controlled my time. How could you believe me, why would you?
I will earn my creed, I will make it true. One day, hour, minute, second, at a time. Not for anyone but me, for first I must show myself that I am worthy of my own respect.
It is 7:51 P.M. central time, on June 9th
I am not dipping, and I have no dip in my place.
This was my last mistake and this is my first day.
Really......
Not sure yet .....
Post a few days then maybe they will take you back......
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I need the pain, I need to know that I failed and I suck, that I dont deserve the right and must earn it. I need this because I am stronger than it, the bitch wont beat me, I wont let it. The bitch is a stupid plant, I am me, I wont let it run my life anymore, I wont let it twist me, make me weak, or dependent on it. I am in control of my body, my mind, and my actions. Nothing can influence me without my consent. And I am done, I am quit for life.
This is my creed
And I say this creed to KTC because you wont accept it, you wont believe it, and you cannot trust me saying it. I have nothing to weigh myself against for you. Up to this point the bitch has won me. the bitch has taken my life, pushed aside my fiancee, chosen my friends, and controlled my time. How could you believe me, why would you?
I will earn my creed, I will make it true. One day, hour, minute, second, at a time. Not for anyone but me, for first I must show myself that I am worthy of my own respect.
It is 7:51 P.M. central time, on June 9th
I am not dipping, and I have no dip in my place.
This was my last mistake and this is my first day.
Really......
Not sure yet .....
Post a few days then maybe they will take you back......
agreed........20 days should work
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I need the pain, I need to know that I failed and I suck, that I dont deserve the right and must earn it. I need this because I am stronger than it, the bitch wont beat me, I wont let it. The bitch is a stupid plant, I am me, I wont let it run my life anymore, I wont let it twist me, make me weak, or dependent on it. I am in control of my body, my mind, and my actions. Nothing can influence me without my consent. And I am done, I am quit for life.
This is my creed
And I say this creed to KTC because you wont accept it, you wont believe it, and you cannot trust me saying it. I have nothing to weigh myself against for you. Up to this point the bitch has won me. the bitch has taken my life, pushed aside my fiancee, chosen my friends, and controlled my time. How could you believe me, why would you?
I will earn my creed, I will make it true. One day, hour, minute, second, at a time. Not for anyone but me, for first I must show myself that I am worthy of my own respect.
It is 7:51 P.M. central time, on June 9th
I am not dipping, and I have no dip in my place.
This was my last mistake and this is my first day.
Really......
Not sure yet .....
Post a few days then maybe they will take you back......
agreed........20 days should work
If thats what it will take then that is what I will do, I would not have told you guys if I didnt care.
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You lasted a day? 2? I've never seen a member last too long after caving 48 hours into a "quit". Hope you grow some quit balls real quick and stay with us because those who drink the koolaid will win this battle. The weak get weeded out quickly...let's see what you're made of kid
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man ill tell you these first couple days are hell. i know i just went through them myself... but you have to ask yourself a question and be honest as you can with yourself. Are you strong enough? is your character strong enough? You replaced you're old reality with the dip. Make a new reality with quit. Every time you dont quit though it will get progressivly harder. If you want this, then get it, dont let the addict in you get the best of you. Show it who is boss!!!
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Im in.
Well Done Jake:
Listen to vadge. He is a bad ass quitter. I llove that it took one guy telling you to throw that shit out and you did it. sounds to me like somebody named JakeH really, really, wants to get out of the hell hole that is addiction.
read everything you can on this site. Post roll and worry about today. tomorrow will take care of itself.
A couple of things a newbie should know. Don't miss posting roll. People don't take kindly to that. People here are serious because they are fighting for their lives and they know, whether you do ro not, that you are too. The next few days are gonna suck. The only way to get through them is ONE DAY AT A TIME.
Post roll. suck it up until bed time. then do it again.
Stay strong Jake. You can do this. You got this shit man!! I love the quit you got goin on brother!
geez jake. you made me look like an ass. I said i loved the quit you had going on. i practically predicted you were gonna kick some nic bitch ass............that really hurts my feelings.
I have read all your repsonses and you sound serious (again). I think I will just watch in silence now and see if your still serious in 72 hours.
come on jake. you can do this shit, one day at a time dude.
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I need the pain, I need to know that I failed and I suck, that I dont deserve the right and must earn it. I need this because I am stronger than it, the bitch wont beat me, I wont let it. The bitch is a stupid plant, I am me, I wont let it run my life anymore, I wont let it twist me, make me weak, or dependent on it. I am in control of my body, my mind, and my actions. Nothing can influence me without my consent. And I am done, I am quit for life.
This is my creed
And I say this creed to KTC because you wont accept it, you wont believe it, and you cannot trust me saying it. I have nothing to weigh myself against for you. Up to this point the bitch has won me. the bitch has taken my life, pushed aside my fiancee, chosen my friends, and controlled my time. How could you believe me, why would you?
I will earn my creed, I will make it true. One day, hour, minute, second, at a time. Not for anyone but me, for first I must show myself that I am worthy of my own respect.
It is 7:51 P.M. central time, on June 9th
I am not dipping, and I have no dip in my place.
This was my last mistake and this is my first day.
Really......
Not sure yet .....
Post a few days then maybe they will take you back......
agreed........20 days should work
Just like to say to all the new people, and people thinking about quitting that it can be done. I had a rough start to say the least. But I am happy to say that I am 20 days quit, and still going strong.
This site will rip you a new one to keep you strong, they are harsh because they must be. I was yelled at when I caved when I was just starting out, and I needed that, it gave me the determination I needed to make it past the first few days. For while I had my reasons for quitting and they were strong good reasons, I still needed a push for those first few days. After those first days I was able to realign myself, figure out truly why I was quitting, understand what that meant. But first I had to clear my head to see them.
It has been 20 days and I hope now I have earned enough respect to start my quit with you all at KTC.
Thank you.
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I need the pain, I need to know that I failed and I suck, that I dont deserve the right and must earn it. I need this because I am stronger than it, the bitch wont beat me, I wont let it. The bitch is a stupid plant, I am me, I wont let it run my life anymore, I wont let it twist me, make me weak, or dependent on it. I am in control of my body, my mind, and my actions. Nothing can influence me without my consent. And I am done, I am quit for life.
This is my creed
And I say this creed to KTC because you wont accept it, you wont believe it, and you cannot trust me saying it. I have nothing to weigh myself against for you. Up to this point the bitch has won me. the bitch has taken my life, pushed aside my fiancee, chosen my friends, and controlled my time. How could you believe me, why would you?
I will earn my creed, I will make it true. One day, hour, minute, second, at a time. Not for anyone but me, for first I must show myself that I am worthy of my own respect.
It is 7:51 P.M. central time, on June 9th
I am not dipping, and I have no dip in my place.
This was my last mistake and this is my first day.
Really......
Not sure yet .....
Post a few days then maybe they will take you back......
agreed........20 days should work
Just like to say to all the new people, and people thinking about quitting that it can be done. I had a rough start to say the least. But I am happy to say that I am 20 days quit, and still going strong.
This site will rip you a new one to keep you strong, they are harsh because they must be. I was yelled at when I caved when I was just starting out, and I needed that, it gave me the determination I needed to make it past the first few days. For while I had my reasons for quitting and they were strong good reasons, I still needed a push for those first few days. After those first days I was able to realign myself, figure out truly why I was quitting, understand what that meant. But first I had to clear my head to see them.
It has been 20 days and I hope now I have earned enough respect to start my quit with you all at KTC.
Thank you.
Getting better.....
How are you handling your craves when they hit?
Have you contacted some of the people in your group or vets to trade numbers and create the accountability needed to overcome the nic-bitch?
Have you developed any determination or resolve?
I want to see you succeed and remain quit but have you started to use the tools and make the contacts?
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I need the pain, I need to know that I failed and I suck, that I dont deserve the right and must earn it. I need this because I am stronger than it, the bitch wont beat me, I wont let it. The bitch is a stupid plant, I am me, I wont let it run my life anymore, I wont let it twist me, make me weak, or dependent on it. I am in control of my body, my mind, and my actions. Nothing can influence me without my consent. And I am done, I am quit for life.
This is my creed
And I say this creed to KTC because you wont accept it, you wont believe it, and you cannot trust me saying it. I have nothing to weigh myself against for you. Up to this point the bitch has won me. the bitch has taken my life, pushed aside my fiancee, chosen my friends, and controlled my time. How could you believe me, why would you?
I will earn my creed, I will make it true. One day, hour, minute, second, at a time. Not for anyone but me, for first I must show myself that I am worthy of my own respect.
It is 7:51 P.M. central time, on June 9th
I am not dipping, and I have no dip in my place.
This was my last mistake and this is my first day.
Really......
Not sure yet .....
Post a few days then maybe they will take you back......
agreed........20 days should work
Just like to say to all the new people, and people thinking about quitting that it can be done. I had a rough start to say the least. But I am happy to say that I am 20 days quit, and still going strong.
This site will rip you a new one to keep you strong, they are harsh because they must be. I was yelled at when I caved when I was just starting out, and I needed that, it gave me the determination I needed to make it past the first few days. For while I had my reasons for quitting and they were strong good reasons, I still needed a push for those first few days. After those first days I was able to realign myself, figure out truly why I was quitting, understand what that meant. But first I had to clear my head to see them.
It has been 20 days and I hope now I have earned enough respect to start my quit with you all at KTC.
Thank you.
Getting better.....
How are you handling your craves when they hit?
Have you contacted some of the people in your group or vets to trade numbers and create the accountability needed to overcome the nic-bitch?
Have you developed any determination or resolve?
I want to see you succeed and remain quit but have you started to use the tools and make the contacts?
his number is in my phone and I am watching him......................isn't that right Jake?
I will not let him go quietly into the night. And he doesn't want me to so yea, I think he is moving in the right direction.
Well done Jake.
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I need the pain, I need to know that I failed and I suck, that I dont deserve the right and must earn it. I need this because I am stronger than it, the bitch wont beat me, I wont let it. The bitch is a stupid plant, I am me, I wont let it run my life anymore, I wont let it twist me, make me weak, or dependent on it. I am in control of my body, my mind, and my actions. Nothing can influence me without my consent. And I am done, I am quit for life.
This is my creed
And I say this creed to KTC because you wont accept it, you wont believe it, and you cannot trust me saying it. I have nothing to weigh myself against for you. Up to this point the bitch has won me. the bitch has taken my life, pushed aside my fiancee, chosen my friends, and controlled my time. How could you believe me, why would you?
I will earn my creed, I will make it true. One day, hour, minute, second, at a time. Not for anyone but me, for first I must show myself that I am worthy of my own respect.
It is 7:51 P.M. central time, on June 9th
I am not dipping, and I have no dip in my place.
This was my last mistake and this is my first day.
Really......
Not sure yet .....
Post a few days then maybe they will take you back......
agreed........20 days should work
Just like to say to all the new people, and people thinking about quitting that it can be done. I had a rough start to say the least. But I am happy to say that I am 20 days quit, and still going strong.
This site will rip you a new one to keep you strong, they are harsh because they must be. I was yelled at when I caved when I was just starting out, and I needed that, it gave me the determination I needed to make it past the first few days. For while I had my reasons for quitting and they were strong good reasons, I still needed a push for those first few days. After those first days I was able to realign myself, figure out truly why I was quitting, understand what that meant. But first I had to clear my head to see them.
It has been 20 days and I hope now I have earned enough respect to start my quit with you all at KTC.
Thank you.
Getting better.....
How are you handling your craves when they hit?
Have you contacted some of the people in your group or vets to trade numbers and create the accountability needed to overcome the nic-bitch?
Have you developed any determination or resolve?
I want to see you succeed and remain quit but have you started to use the tools and make the contacts?
his number is in my phone and I am watching him......................isn't that right Jake?
I will not let him go quietly into the night. And he doesn't want me to so yea, I think he is moving in the right direction.
Well done Jake.
Yah I have gotten some numbers, some new friends, and some poeple who seem to know just when I need them, and others who have helped me more than I ever expected.
Just a special shout out to Steve, Pat, and Wade. Thanks so much guys.
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I brought this forward from sept Pre HOF this a perfect example of how to get those tools for the weekend or just for your quit!
Hey guys, Im a little worried about this coming week. I have a family reunion, which includes plane rides (not a great flyer), a whole 28 people stuck in a small place with one bathroom, and not a moment of peace to yourself. Now dont get me wrong, Im not going to cave, not an option. But that doesnt mean im not worried about the week sucking ass and being a living hell because of it.
Due to this I dont want to ask the three people who I have gotten numbers from to take on all my pain and anger. So I was hoping I could get some of my awesome September brother's numbers to help me out. Im on day 20 here, so im just starting still, but I think this could be a great time for someone else looking for support to vent as well.
Please PM me if your interested. I would appreciate it.