KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Wt57 on April 01, 2012, 11:00:00 AM
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Its been about18 hr into my quit and I wake up and wonder what I did last night I cave into KTC.
Im a jerk.  54 yr old grandpa been a slave to the bitch for 40yr.  thats right 40 years.  I have had a couple pauses for 2-3 yr dozen of other for 2-3 weeks but never quit.  Well that changed today I quit or I'll die!!  I've thought about today for the past few months and planned for it for a couple weeks been trying to get some sever depression under control. Came across KTC while planning and sounds like I'm in.  I've caved so many times that I've been afraid of failing again, rather than caving back to slow suicide I'll probably just find a faster way.  This isn't a try or attempt.  it is my quit!!!  I had a quit day planned out but it is too far away so I'm moving it up, not putting it off any more  because I'm ready NOW!!!  I ve been a slave for longer than some of you have been alive but we are all the same a bunch of stupid jerks controlled by the NIC bitch.  I know what the next few weeks are going to be like, I've been there we need too help each other.  If I can do it so can you!  This is probably the most I will ever have to say, believe it or not I'm a really quiet guy, kind of Introverted.  Also typing on my Itouch with big dippin fingers and old man eyes.  See you at roll call everyday Im ready.
I wanted to add something to this intro. I mentioned that I had a quit day planned but moved it up. Well my day was April 11 our 32nd wedding anniversary, I was going tell her I was doing it for us. Well starting my quit 11 days early is just that much better it is still for us.
more thoughts on my addiction!
I've been thinking of some really stupid things my addiction made me do. Couple weeks ago I had a colonoscopy ( remember I'm OLD, see what you have to look forward too.) 2 days before the hose job nothing but clear liquid, and always gutted my cope. Couldn't go 2 days so I got cope pouches. Swallowed that shit along with the gallon of radiator flush. Only went without my "friend" for about 3 hrs. Through all of this I was worried about spots in my gut that probably trapped tabacoo, fear of cancer everywhere, but still kept on stuffing that shit in my face. Luck gut was clean as a whistle. That flush and chew only takes about 5 min to make it from mouth to ass. 'arse'
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Going into day 3 of my quit as well. Chewed about 27 years and finally said I'm done. Now that I am cleaning out a little I have to say the stuff was holding me back. This weekend has been great so far. Finally having a good laugh with my kids. I'm in a much better mood (not letting bills or life piss me off so much) and overall feeling pretty good. The past 2 nights I have not slept well but today it's not slowing me down too much, I have been a bit scatterbrained today but I'll take that over being in a bad mood.
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Going into day 3 of my quit as well. Chewed about 27 years and finally said I'm done. Now that I am cleaning out a little I have to say the stuff was holding me back. This weekend has been great so far. Finally having a good laugh with my kids. I'm in a much better mood (not letting bills or life piss me off so much) and overall feeling pretty good. The past 2 nights I have not slept well but today it's not slowing me down too much, I have been a bit scatterbrained today but I'll take that over being in a bad mood.
Hey Baker good work on the quit. I see you haven't posted roll yet so you probably haven't figured out how things work yet. Check out the WELCOME CENTER (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showforum=13)
Then come on over the July 2012 quit group and post roll (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=50). If you using a PC then here is a video (http://www.killthecan.org/roll/) on how to post roll.
You can also post your own separate introduction if you want, but the most important thing is to get into the July 2012 quit group and make you promise each day to not chew or have any nicotine that day.
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Its been about18 hr into my quit and I wake up and wonder what I did last night I cave into KTC.
Im a jerk.  54 yr old grandpa been a slave to the bitch for 38 yr.  thats right 38 years.  I have had a couple pauses for 2-3 yr dozen of other for 2-3 weeks but never quit.  Well that changed today I quit or I'll die!!  I've thought about today for the past few months and planned for it for a couple weeks been trying to get some sever depression under control. Came across KTC while planning and sounds like I'm in.  I've caved so many times that I've been afraid of failing again, rather than caving back to slow suicide I'll probably just find a faster way.  This isn't a try or attempt.  it is my quit!!!  I had a quit day planned out but it is too far away so I'm moving it up, not putting it off any more  because I'm ready NOW!!!  I ve been a slave for longer than some of you have been alive but we are all the same a bunch of stupid jerks controlled by the NIC bitch.  I know what the next few weeks are going to be like, I've been there we need too help each other.  If I can do it so can you!  This is probably the most I will ever have to say, believe it or not I'm a really quiet guy, kind of Introverted.  Also typing on my Itouch with big dippin fingers and old man eyes.  See you at roll call everyday Im ready.
Best decision you have ever made. I didn't dip for 38 years, but I never took a break from nicotine for over 20 years. I quit on March 1. The past 31 days have been tough but managebale. My advice is to read this site, and if feel free to post questions and thoughts. PM me if you need a hand beating this shit.
Go to the banner at the top of the page and cllick on Welcome Center. It will steer your through the proces and get you started.
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Huge congrats on your first day. Way to post roll. You can do this!
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HUGE COGRATS to Grandpa and Baker!!! You both can do this...mutual accountablility. Stay strong, post roll, keep your word, and live free!!!
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WT, this is very possible. Keep reminding yourself of that. I'm a 25 year dipper, 20 years is a dime a dozen around here. Quite a few 30+ year guys.
you got this.
Post roll every...damn...day! That will get you to the promised land.
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WT, this is very possible. Keep reminding yourself of that. I'm a 25 year dipper, 20 years is a dime a dozen around here. Quite a few 30+ year guys.
you got this.
Post roll every...damn...day! That will get you to the promised land.
Way to go man. You made a great decision and while these first few days are undoubtedly going to be tough, all you have to do is worry about today. Tomorrow you will wake up, post roll for Day 3, and then repeat. One day at a time for the rest of your life.
Proud to quit with you today and every day.
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Im ready.
I was too.
Ready - 1,523.
You can do this.
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Welcome. You came to the right place. Yell if you need anything.
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NO more. You have this, this is it. Nice move on quitting early.
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Its been about18 hr into my quit and I wake up and wonder what I did last night I cave into KTC.
Im a jerk.  54 yr old grandpa been a slave to the bitch for 38 yr.  thats right 38 years.  I have had a couple pauses for 2-3 yr dozen of other for 2-3 weeks but never quit.  Well that changed today I quit or I'll die!!  I've thought about today for the past few months and planned for it for a couple weeks been trying to get some sever depression under control. Came across KTC while planning and sounds like I'm in.  I've caved so many times that I've been afraid of failing again, rather than caving back to slow suicide I'll probably just find a faster way.  This isn't a try or attempt.  it is my quit!!!  I had a quit day planned out but it is too far away so I'm moving it up, not putting it off any more  because I'm ready NOW!!!  I ve been a slave for longer than some of you have been alive but we are all the same a bunch of stupid jerks controlled by the NIC bitch.  I know what the next few weeks are going to be like, I've been there we need too help each other.  If I can do it so can you!  This is probably the most I will ever have to say, believe it or not I'm a really quiet guy, kind of Introverted.  Also typing on my Itouch with big dippin fingers and old man eyes.  See you at roll call everyday Im ready.
I wanted to add something to this intro. I mentioned that I had a quit day planned but moved it up. Well my day was April 11 our 32nd wedding anniversary, I was going tell her I was doing it for us. Well starting my quit 11 days early is just that much better it is still for us.
WT-
You can do this. This site and members will help. I'm 51, chewed cope since I was 13. Quit 54 days ago now.
I'm thinking clear, cravings get less and less.
Take it one day quit at a time. Quit for yourself first, and if you need to rant or rave do it here rather than at your loved ones. We know exactly what you are going through.
Give me a shout if you want my numbers.
Welcome to your freedom...
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Its been about18 hr into my quit and I wake up and wonder what I did last night I cave into KTC.
Im a jerk.  54 yr old grandpa been a slave to the bitch for 38 yr.  thats right 38 years.  I have had a couple pauses for 2-3 yr dozen of other for 2-3 weeks but never quit.  Well that changed today I quit or I'll die!!  I've thought about today for the past few months and planned for it for a couple weeks been trying to get some sever depression under control. Came across KTC while planning and sounds like I'm in.  I've caved so many times that I've been afraid of failing again, rather than caving back to slow suicide I'll probably just find a faster way.  This isn't a try or attempt.  it is my quit!!!  I had a quit day planned out but it is too far away so I'm moving it up, not putting it off any more  because I'm ready NOW!!!  I ve been a slave for longer than some of you have been alive but we are all the same a bunch of stupid jerks controlled by the NIC bitch.  I know what the next few weeks are going to be like, I've been there we need too help each other.  If I can do it so can you!  This is probably the most I will ever have to say, believe it or not I'm a really quiet guy, kind of Introverted.  Also typing on my Itouch with big dippin fingers and old man eyes.  See you at roll call everyday Im ready.
I wanted to add something to this intro. I mentioned that I had a quit day planned but moved it up. Well my day was April 11 our 32nd wedding anniversary, I was going tell her I was doing it for us. Well starting my quit 11 days early is just that much better it is still for us.
more thoughts on my addiction!
I've been thinking of some really stupid things my addiction made me do. Couple weeks ago I had a colonoscopy ( remember I'm OLD, see what you have to look forward too.) 2 days before the hose job nothing but clear liquid, and always gutted my cope. Couldn't go 2 days so I got cope pouches. Swallowed that shit along with the gallon of radiator flush. Only went without my "friend" for about 3 hrs. Through all of this I was worried about spots in my gut that probably trapped tabacoo, fear of cancer everywhere, but still kept on stuffing that shit in my face. Luck gut was clean as a whistle. That flush and chew only takes about 5 min to make it from mouth to ass. 'arse'
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Its been about18 hr into my quit and I wake up and wonder what I did last night I cave into KTC.
Im a jerk.  54 yr old grandpa been a slave to the bitch for 38 yr.  thats right 38 years.  I have had a couple pauses for 2-3 yr dozen of other for 2-3 weeks but never quit.  Well that changed today I quit or I'll die!!  I've thought about today for the past few months and planned for it for a couple weeks been trying to get some sever depression under control. Came across KTC while planning and sounds like I'm in.  I've caved so many times that I've been afraid of failing again, rather than caving back to slow suicide I'll probably just find a faster way.  This isn't a try or attempt.  it is my quit!!!  I had a quit day planned out but it is too far away so I'm moving it up, not putting it off any more  because I'm ready NOW!!!  I ve been a slave for longer than some of you have been alive but we are all the same a bunch of stupid jerks controlled by the NIC bitch.  I know what the next few weeks are going to be like, I've been there we need too help each other.  If I can do it so can you!  This is probably the most I will ever have to say, believe it or not I'm a really quiet guy, kind of Introverted.  Also typing on my Itouch with big dippin fingers and old man eyes.  See you at roll call everyday Im ready.
I wanted to add something to this intro. I mentioned that I had a quit day planned but moved it up. Well my day was April 11 our 32nd wedding anniversary, I was going tell her I was doing it for us. Well starting my quit 11 days early is just that much better it is still for us.
more thoughts on my addiction!
I've been thinking of some really stupid things my addiction made me do. Couple weeks ago I had a colonoscopy ( remember I'm OLD, see what you have to look forward too.) 2 days before the hose job nothing but clear liquid, and always gutted my cope. Couldn't go 2 days so I got cope pouches. Swallowed that shit along with the gallon of radiator flush. Only went without my "friend" for about 3 hrs. Through all of this I was worried about spots in my gut that probably trapped tabacoo, fear of cancer everywhere, but still kept on stuffing that shit in my face. Luck gut was clean as a whistle. That flush and chew only takes about 5 min to make it from mouth to ass. 'arse'
Damn You're lucky! I had my colon rotor rooter job a couple of years ago and they had to remove a bunch of pollops. I did that crap or smoked cigs about as long as you did. I am over 3 years quit and feel like a new person after coming out from the umbrella of the nic bitch. Quitting is the BEST decision you will ever make!!!! Welcome to the site from one old fart to another!!! :P PM me if I can help in any way!!!
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Its been about18 hr into my quit and I wake up and wonder what I did last night I cave into KTC.
Im a jerk.  54 yr old grandpa been a slave to the bitch for 38 yr.  thats right 38 years.  I have had a couple pauses for 2-3 yr dozen of other for 2-3 weeks but never quit.  Well that changed today I quit or I'll die!!  I've thought about today for the past few months and planned for it for a couple weeks been trying to get some sever depression under control. Came across KTC while planning and sounds like I'm in.  I've caved so many times that I've been afraid of failing again, rather than caving back to slow suicide I'll probably just find a faster way.  This isn't a try or attempt.  it is my quit!!!  I had a quit day planned out but it is too far away so I'm moving it up, not putting it off any more  because I'm ready NOW!!!  I ve been a slave for longer than some of you have been alive but we are all the same a bunch of stupid jerks controlled by the NIC bitch.  I know what the next few weeks are going to be like, I've been there we need too help each other.  If I can do it so can you!  This is probably the most I will ever have to say, believe it or not I'm a really quiet guy, kind of Introverted.  Also typing on my Itouch with big dippin fingers and old man eyes.  See you at roll call everyday Im ready.Â
I wanted to add something to this intro. I mentioned that I had a quit day planned but moved it up. Well my day was April 11 our 32nd wedding anniversary, I was going tell her I was doing it for us. Well starting my quit 11 days early is just that much better it is still for us.
more thoughts on my addiction!
I've been thinking of some really stupid things my addiction made me do. Couple weeks ago I had a colonoscopy ( remember I'm OLD, see what you have to look forward too.) 2 days before the hose job nothing but clear liquid, and always gutted my cope. Couldn't go 2 days so I got cope pouches. Swallowed that shit along with the gallon of radiator flush. Only went without my "friend" for about 3 hrs. Through all of this I was worried about spots in my gut that probably trapped tabacoo, fear of cancer everywhere, but still kept on stuffing that shit in my face. Luck gut was clean as a whistle. That flush and chew only takes about 5 min to make it from mouth to ass. 'arse'
Damn You're lucky! I had my colon rotor rooter job a couple of years ago and they had to remove a bunch of pollops. I did that crap or smoked cigs about as long as you did. I am over 3 years quit and feel like a new person after coming out from the umbrella of the nic bitch. Quitting is the BEST decision you will ever make!!!! Welcome to the site from one old fart to another!!! :P PM me if I can help in any way!!!
So they make ya come back in 5 for another? My wife is drinking the flush tonight gotta stand back! Looking at your profile you shouldn't worry your old enough you got both feet in the grave I only got 1 in and started pulling it out 5 days ago. Jokeing around make one forget the pain.
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Fellow July Quiters
I owe you an apology
No I didn't cave I have been thinking all day that over the past 5 days I have been feeling sorry for myself and envious of some of you. I have been feeling that you are lucky because have quit so much younger than me. that you won't miss out on alot of the things that I have because I let the bitch control my life for so long. Then the past 2 nights I have talked to one of our younger quiters and I finally realized that we are all the same we are here for one reason and that is that we are addicted to nicotine!!!! Thanks bro for waking me up even though you didn't know the impact you were having on this old man. It is easy to look back and feel sorry for myself but I'm the one that kept pokeing that shit in my mouth. The past is water under the bridge and I'm going to be looking upstream from now on. If any of you catch me whinning about my age or the time ive been addicted I expect you to pour holy hell down on me, and I know that a bunch of frickin addicts can be good at that. That doesn't mean that from time to time I might give some fatherly advise to some of you young punks!!
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hey man thank you too. our talks on the phone have woken me up as well and im really happy that we can help eachother out. im glad i have you because i need a father figure that can help me stay quit. my dad gets so stressed with work that for some time he said to just use dip a little while im young. i dont think my dad understands that i can never have dip again if im gonna be free.
wt57 your the quit father that ive never had before and the advice you give me helps give me the drive to stay quit!
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I'm ok today but I do need to vent and just blow off some shit from my mind! Yesterday sucked but I slept good last night for a change. This morning I felt really good and stronger than I had been yesterday. Then out of no where I got hit by a big fucking crave, lasted of and on for half hour or so. My wife and I went to a wedding right after that and I swear every guy there had a big chew in their lip, bam another big crave. Got the hell out of there in a hurry. Later in the day my son in law and I had to deliver a truck to town, stopped by a convenence store to get a pop and I didn't even think about a chew till I opened my wallet to pay, tucked down in the corner of my wallet was a old dried up cope pouch I had hid for emergency when I got that damn colonoscopy. I closed that damn wallet up and all the way home I kept craving that shit. When I got home I grabbed my wife and showed her what I found and said get rid of it. I didn't even want to touch the shit!! I also trimmed my long shaggy mustache that I've had for years to help conceal my chew. She asked why I was trimming it and I told her I didn't need it any more, she had no idea I kept it for that reason. Well Im looking forward to tomorrow just relax and flip tabacco off one more day.
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screw up
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I'm ok today but I do need to vent and just blow off some shit from my mind! Yesterday sucked but I slept good last night for a change. This morning I felt really good and stronger than I had been yesterday. Then out of no where I got hit by a big fucking crave, lasted of and on for half hour or so. My wife and I went to a wedding right after that and I swear every guy there had a big chew in their lip, bam another big crave. Got the hell out of there in a hurry. Later in the day my son in law and I had to deliver a truck to town, stopped by a convenence store to get a pop and I didn't even think about a chew till I opened my wallet to pay, tucked down in the corner of my wallet was a old dried up cope pouch I had hid for emergency when I got that damn colonoscopy. I closed that damn wallet up and all the way home I kept craving that shit. When I got home I grabbed my wife and showed her what I found and said get rid of it. I didn't even want to touch the shit!! I also trimmed my long shaggy mustache that I've had for years to help conceal my chew. She asked why I was trimming it and I told her I didn't need it any more, she had no idea I kept it for that reason. Well Im looking forward to tomorrow just relax and flip tabacco off one more day.
1 day at a time. Trust me, it gets easier and it is worth it. Great job staying clean!
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I love this poem and feel the fork in the road can represent our decision to quit, we are at that fork every morning when we face each other at roll call. Stay on the right path, stay quit.
The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Robert Frost
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Ive got a question for a vet, preferably one that is older.
I am very strongly committed to my quit, I will be here every morning and promise myself, you other addicts and also I promise my wife of 32 years no more lies. My delima is that I look at other quitter especialllly new ones, and especially if they are younger, I try to get to know right away. I want to just shake the shit out of them and show them what that shit has done to my life and strengthen their committment. Now the true problem a couple times Ive done this and granted its only 10 days, but they have caved and I feel in some way that I have failed. I know I didnt put that shit in their mouth but I wonder if I could have done more. I almost feel the need to help some them to make up for my past failures, almost like a parent living the life they wish they had had through their children. I know that my mane concern is my own quit but it just keeps eating at me. Well so much for my rambling. Ill take any advise or suggestions.
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Ive got a question for a vet, preferably one that is older.Â
I am very strongly committed to my quit, I will be here every morning and promise myself, you other addicts and also I promise my wife of 32 years no more lies. My delima is that I look at other quitter especialllly new ones, and especially if they are younger, I try to get to know right away. I want to just shake the shit out of them and show them what that shit has done to my life and strengthen their committment. Now the true problem a couple times Ive done this and granted its only 10 days, but they have caved and I feel in some way that I have failed. I know I didnt put that shit in their mouth but I wonder if I could have done more. I almost feel the need to help some them to make up for my past failures, almost like a parent living the life they wish they had had through their children. I know that my mane concern is my own quit but it just keeps eating at me. Well so much for my rambling. Ill take any advise or suggestions.
Here are a couple of thoughts from a dude who caved....
First, there was nothing you could have done to stop me from caving when I did.
Guys tried - They texted and called and left messages and shit.
But I ignored them and caved.
Get your head around this, bro...
Your help is strong and alive, but it's here.
We all make it clear that the help lives here.
You're willing to give it but dudes have to show up and take it for it to work.
Own this - There's only so much you can do.
Thank you for keeping your help alive and working, bro.
Somebody's going to need it, but they're going to have to reach for it, at least halfway.
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WT, you were one of the first guys to hit me up. I wont forget that. And if I think about cave'n, I think about letting you down. What you're doing IS working. Its a sad fact of life, and in almost everything humans do that is self destructive... remember, you cant save them all. Not fair to yourself to blow yourself up for that. That's in our DNA, its primal.
I for one, thank you and try and pay it forward by jumping on other guys that come in (that sounded pretty ghey didn't it?) 'Crazy' 'na na'
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Ive got a question for a vet, preferably one that is older.Â
I am very strongly committed to my quit, I will be here every morning and promise myself, you other addicts and also I promise my wife of 32 years no more lies. My delima is that I look at other quitter especialllly new ones, and especially if they are younger,  I try to get to know right away. I want to just shake the shit out of them and show them what that shit has done to my life and strengthen their committment. Now the true problem a couple times Ive done this and granted its only 10 days, but they have caved and I feel in some way that I have failed. I know I didnt put that shit in their mouth but I wonder if I could have done more. I almost feel the need to help some them to make up for my past failures, almost like a parent living the life they wish they had had through their children. I know that my mane concern is my own quit but it just keeps eating at me. Well so much for my rambling. Ill take any advise or suggestions.
Here are a couple of thoughts from a dude who caved....
First, there was nothing you could have done to stop me from caving when I did.
Guys tried - They texted and called and left messages and shit.
But I ignored them and caved.
Get your head around this, bro...
Your help is strong and alive, but it's here.
We all make it clear that the help lives here.
You're willing to give it but dudes have to show up and take it for it to work.
Own this - There's only so much you can do.
Thank you for keeping your help alive and working, bro.
Somebody's going to need it, but they're going to have to reach for it, at least halfway.
WT- I'm no sage vet, but I think SWJ is dead on. People have to want to be helped for help to be effective. You can't own other peoples caves or screw-ups. All you can do is chose for yourself, and be there to help if they ask for it and especially after they start over again. It is hard not to take it personally when someone you've talked to or gotten to know caves, but helping others stay tight always helps your own quit...
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wt,
You were the first one on this site to contact me as well. Im no veteran, but I have worked with quite a few patients who used tobacco up until the day they die. Lets not kid ourselves, quitting is really f-ing hard.
I wouldn't look at the ones who cave as failures on your part-just think about the difference you are making in the lives of those who stay quit.
That goes for everyone who posts on this forum. There are a lot of people out there who say they want to help their fellow man, want to be the hero, save lives, what have you. Then they miss the meaning that a simple word of encouragement can have when someone is going through tough times.
The support I have found on this forum has made a meaningful difference in my life so far. Keep up the good work!
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Fellow quitters: My mind is beginning to clear, I'm seeing thing that I haven't seen for alooong time. I've been trying to decide how I want to track my quit. I've read a lot of others experiences, their logs, journal etc. like everything I read. I see several purpose, therapy for myself, help other and hell sometime it's just funny.
My reflection on the past 14 days: day before my quit was hell I really didn't want to quit (not true). I was afraid to quit, I didn't know how to live without tabacco, I really never have.
Day 1-11 of my quit yo-yo in the dark. Too many different emotions to express. Not alone though KTC friend have been great!
Day 12 yesterday the sun has begun to rise, it is like a beautiful morning watching the fog lift. I see how fresh everything looks and smells. I also see patches of fog lingering about, some still quite dense. I look forward to watching these patches lift. I feel wonderful today, but like my granddad always said when we left on a long day of horse back ride ( don't forget your slicker "raincoat") you never know when a storm will come up out of nowhere. I feel very good today but I have my slicker. KTC is One of my slickers.
Day 14 the 13th day of my quit. I just got through watching the sun rise in the east on a new day. It is beautiful, I feel confident in my quit. As I talk I'm keeping a eye on the western sky there are some suspicious clouds. Thanks to all of you I'm bracing myself if a storm forms today.
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Congrats WT!!! The first two weeks are the hardest. You're off to a great start. But remember, that's all it is...a start. It sounds like you know already, but quitting is done one day at a time. Stay strong and stay quit, brother.
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Congrats WT!!! The first two weeks are the hardest. You're off to a great start. But remember, that's all it is...a start. It sounds like you know already, but quitting is done one day at a time. Stay strong and stay quit, brother.
You've been here for two weeks already? Wow that went fast. For me at least. Nice work this is therapy for all of us.
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Fellow quitters: My mind is beginning to clear, I'm seeing thing that I haven't seen for alooong time. I've been trying to decide how I want to track my quit. I've read a lot of others experiences, their logs, journal etc. like everything I read. I see several purpose, therapy for myself, help other and hell sometime it's just funny.
My reflection on the past 14 days: day before my quit was hell I really didn't want to quit (not true). I was afraid to quit, I didn't know how to live without tabacco, I really never have.Â
Day 1-11 of my quit yo-yo in the dark. Too many different emotions to express. Not alone though KTC friend have been great!
Day 12 yesterday the sun has begun to rise, it is like a beautiful morning watching the fog lift. I see how fresh everything looks and smells. I also see patches of fog lingering about, some still quite dense. I look forward to watching these patches lift. I feel wonderful today, but like my granddad always said when we left on a long day of horse back ride ( don't forget your slicker "raincoat") you never know when a storm will come up out of nowhere. I feel very good today but I have my slicker. KTC is One of my slickers.
Day 14 the 13th day of my quit. I just got through watching the sun rise in the east on a new day. It is beautiful, I feel confident in my quit. As I talk I'm keeping a eye on the western sky there are some suspicious clouds. Thanks to all of you I'm bracing myself if a storm forms today.
Great first hurdle!!! 'Cheers'
Enjoy the early success and have it build resove and commitment!!! 'party2'
Great work getting the badass quit going well!!!!
Stay focused and stay QUIT!!!
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Congrats WT!!! The first two weeks are the hardest. You're off to a great start. But remember, that's all it is...a start. It sounds like you know already, but quitting is done one day at a time. Stay strong and stay quit, brother.
You've been here for two weeks already? Wow that went fast. For me at least. Nice work this is therapy for all of us.
Actually day 13 but I look at the day before I quit as a pivotal day in my life. I did a lot of deep soul searching that day paced the floor for hours, read KTC and prayed for strength. I know that I was lead into this new life by God and all of you my quit family. Thanks again.
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Congrats WT!!!  The first two weeks are the hardest. You're off to a great start. But remember, that's all it is...a start. It sounds like you know already, but quitting is done one day at a time. Stay strong and stay quit, brother.
You've been here for two weeks already? Wow that went fast. For me at least. Nice work this is therapy for all of us.
Actually day 13 but I look at the day before I quit as a pivotal day in my life. I did a lot of deep soul searching that day paced the floor for hours, read KTC and prayed for strength. I know that I was lead into this new life by God and all of you my quit family. Thanks again.
The freedom from that crap is great isn't it? Never forget that you thought you couldn't live without the can. Never forget what it feels like to step up and be a man and conquer that shit.
You are kicking ass. Keep it up.
Quit for today...just today.
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Ive been feeling really good the past few days only mild craves. This morning was great. Then out of nowhere, no trigger, nothing BAM I got hit by a huge crave. I'm not in danger because I quit today but it was so fricking big that I wasn't prepared for it. My commitment to quit is bigger than that SOB.
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ONE DAY AT A TIME
I'm only human; I'm just a man
Help me believe in what I could be and all that I am
Show me the stairway
I have to climb
Lord for my sake
Teach me to take
One day at a time
One day at a time, sweet Jesus
That's all I'm asking from you
Give me the strength to do everything that I have to do
Yesterday's gone sweet Jesus
And tomorrow may never be mine
Help me today
Show me the way
One day at a time.
Could you remember
When you walked among men
Jesus, you know when you're looking below
It's worse now than then
Pushin' and shovin' crowd in your mind
Lord for my sake
Teach me to take
One day at a time
My grandmother used to sing this and play it on the piano all the time. I had forgotten. Seeing a these words brought a flood of stuff.
I am quit today. One day at a time.
Thanks for making me remember.
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Ive been feeling really good the past few days only mild craves. This morning was great. Then out of nowhere, no trigger, nothing BAM I got hit by a huge crave. I'm not in danger because I quit today but it was so fricking big that I wasn't prepared for it. My commitment to quit is bigger than that SOB.
thank god for the high price of gas
I've been trying to understand this massive crave today don't know of any trigger, I'm just really glad that I live so far from store, on Sunday the closest chew is 150 mile round trip. Not that I haven't made the trip before only for a can; KTC, my commitment this morning, my new found integrity, the price of gas, my wife, and grand kids help me keep my promise to quit all day today!!
Thank You
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I'm just really glad that I live so far from store, on Sunday the closest chew is 150 mile round trip.
Wow, you're 75 miles from the nearest store? Where the heck do you live?
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I'm just really glad that I live so far from store, on Sunday the closest chew is 150 mile round trip.
Wow, you're 75 miles from the nearest store? Where the heck do you live?
the middle of nowhere and then take a left
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I'm just really glad that I live so far from store, on Sunday the closest chew is 150 mile round trip.
Wow, you're 75 miles from the nearest store? Where the heck do you live?
the middle of nowhere and then take a left
Isnt that just south of Wherethehellami ave.?
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I'm just really glad that I live so far from store, on Sunday the closest chew is 150 mile round trip.
Wow, you're 75 miles from the nearest store? Where the heck do you live?
the middle of nowhere and then take a left
Isnt that just south of Wherethehellami ave.?
Actually it's north
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WHY QUIT.
Quit brothers and sisters, I have had something on my mind since day 1, actually I have thought about it for years. People quit for different reasons, something that bother one person dosenÂ’t bother another. I apologize in advance if this gets to lengthy. IÂ’ll try to condense it as much as possible.
Like most of you over the years IÂ’ve checked my mouth for sores especially when my mouth hurt. Afraid of getting cancer was always in the back of my mind but not a motivation to quit. Even after losing many teeth, still no motivation. Pictures of cancer victims didnÂ’t do it either. That brings me to my story that shows how stupid IÂ’ve been.
As an invincible 20 something I had a neighbor who was in his mid 80’s we had been hunting buddies, 'Remshot' Roe chewed A LOT and he got mouth cancer. I would go and set with him to give his wife a break. He wouldn’t go to the Dr. or take pain meds. He got a big hole in the side of his face and his wife would pick bone and teeth out daily. His jaw quit working and couldn’t open his mouth no problem he had a hole in his face to pour soup into. After feeding him his wife would clean the hole, pour ½ a can of Copenhagen in and cover it with a kotex, and then bandage his whole face back up. This whole f—king time I would set there with him and have a big fatty in my mouth. He lasted a little over a year after he first got the cancer and it was HELL!! Why would I continue?
My motivation to quit has been completely unrelated to the fear of cancer. IÂ’ve lived a life of very deep depression and used the chew as a way to cope with life, I thought. Not so: my addiction has proved to do just the opposite it has made me even more depressed because I always tried to hide it from my family and friends. Yes IÂ’ve been a ninja dipper for almost 40 yrs. Over the past 3 weeks I have found that I am finally free of my secret life and open to talk about my addiction with you and my family. My depression is leaving me each day a little at a time as I quit each day.
I feel a profound obligation to do anything that I can to help younger addicts quit while they are still young. I donÂ’t want to see anyone be as stupid as I have been! I donÂ’t care what your motivation is if you have quit stay quit with me!! If you are reading this and havenÂ’t quit, throw that shit away and run to post your quit NOW. There are always reasons to wait until tomorrow, but tomorrow never comes it just move on to the next tomorrow. I know this better than anyone I've had over 13,000 tomorrows. But now I've had 22 todays, I dont want to look back or ahead all that is important to me right now is TODAY and I QUIT AGAIN!!!!
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Time to move on
My friend Mark has helped me see that I had much more than nicotine to give up! At a time when the nic bitch was placing those thoughts of doubt into my head and I had been dwelling on the past and feeling sorry for myself, my friend said "quit crying over spilled milk". Well last night I reevaluated my life, the things that I was using as excuses to chew, the thing that were hang-ups slowing my advancing in life and things that I have allowed to make me depressed. I took these people and thing that were holding me back and figuratively flushed them down the same toilet which I had flushed those last 3 cans of chew down 25 days ago. Now I can go forward and my weaknesses are going to become my strengths. I will rely on God, myself and you my quit friends, to move on. I'm here to give you a hand when you are weak, and will come to you when I'm weak. This is such a simple concept.
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WT -you're writing is great - I think I can out stupid you from your previous post - sorry - I get that honor - will be in my HOF letter in around 60 days.
Hang tough - swimmerdave
Time to move on
My friend Mark has helped me see that I had much more than nicotine to give up! At a time when the nic bitch was placing those thoughts of doubt into my head and I had been dwelling on the past and feeling sorry for myself, my friend said "quit crying over spilled milk". Well last night I reevaluated my life, the things that I was using as excuses to chew, the thing that were hang-ups slowing my advancing in life and things that I have allowed to make me depressed. I took these people and thing that were holding me back and figuratively flushed them down the same toilet which I had flushed those last 3 cans of chew down 25 days ago. Now I can go forward and my weaknesses are going to become my strengths. I will rely on God, myself and you my quit friends, to move on. I'm here to give you a hand when you are weak, and will come to you when I'm weak. This is such a simple concept.
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He got a big hole in the side of his face and his wife would pick bone and teeth out daily. His jaw quit working and couldn’t open his mouth no problem he had a hole in his face to pour soup into. After feeding him his wife would clean the hole, pour ½ a can of Copenhagen in and cover it with a kotex, and then bandage his whole face back up.
Un-freaking-real. This kind of shit shows the true power of addiction; both your friend going through that shit and still using, and you sitting beside that freakshow while using.
I will never put that crap into my body again. Yes, I don't mind saying that, with conviction. And I also quit a day at a time, starting today.
Stay strong.
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He got a big hole in the side of his face and his wife would pick bone and teeth out daily. His jaw quit working and couldn’t open his mouth no problem he had a hole in his face to pour soup into. After feeding him his wife would clean the hole, pour ½ a can of Copenhagen in and cover it with a kotex, and then bandage his whole face back up.
Un-freaking-real. This kind of shit shows the true power of addiction; both your friend going through that shit and still using, and you sitting beside that freakshow while using.
I will never put that crap into my body again. Yes, I don't mind saying that, with conviction. And I also quit a day at a time, starting today.
Stay strong.
That is some real emotion that I never had to experience. The thought of that being me lying in the bed and getting soup fed through a hole in my face. I never believed...I could be that guy...until today. Any of us could be that guy. My heart broke thinking about how hard it would be for the wife to care for a man that didn't have to suffer if he would have never touched the stuff.
Then to be at such a hopeless state. Probably they thought, "well there is nothing I can do now so I might as well die with it." How hard for the wife to have to put the poison in his mouth. The enemy owned her husband and she had to nurse him not to health but to his death.
Oh how hard. For him, for his wife, for you...The pain.
With all that anguish, I could only imagine those fine people in the Tobacco industry sitting in the board room and thinking up ways to recruit children to the product. They know the dangers of their product and they don't care. They promote it? If you sent them letters and pictures of your friend and suffering....It would get ignored. I am sure that they would trash it and try to sell more product.
WT Great posts. Real heart felt emotion. Thanks for trusting us to share this. I am so sorry for the pain and experience you had. However, feeling the emotions of this truth, I am Quit! This builds on my resolve that TOBACCO and anyone who sympathizes with that industry is a domestic terrorist and we should fight and expose the secrets they keep.
I've said it before. I am at war with big tobacco. This is a war and surrender isn't going to happen. This war I have declared on tobacco will be fought every day I live. My war with Tobacco ends when I die or that industry dies. Period. I don't want help from Government...they are part of the problem and can't fix it. It has to be educating people enough that the 6th -9th grade youth of America see the truth and run from the evil empire.
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My cave is about to take a new twist. God has been part of my quit from the beginning and I will continue to give Him credit for leading me here to KTC.
DISCLAIMER
I don't want to offend anyone and that isn't my intent. I have a very strong faith in God and in no way want to come across as sacrilegious. If you find the things I type offensive don't read them. your right suck-it no PC for me
Genesis 1
1Â In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
11Â And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
Genesis 2
17Â But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
My thoughts:
God created the earth and it is really good. Man rapes the land and still this world can repair itself.
God creates every type of vegetation for the use of man. Man finds every conceivable way to abuse the gifts he is given.
God said don't use that plant or you will die. Man runs to it and cultivates this beautiful tabacco plant, and disobeys god by abusing it in every imaginable way.
God warned if you use it you'll die. Man can't stop using it once he starts, and man starts to slowly die.
I'm guilty of misusing the gifts of god. I quit 27 days ago and will no longer abuse this one plant that God placed here on the earth.
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My cave is about to take a new twist. God has been part of my quit from the beginning and I will continue to give Him credit for leading me here to KTC.
DISCLAIMER
I don't want to offend anyone and that isn't my intent. I have a very strong faith in God and in no way want to come across as sacrilegious. If you find the things I type offensive don't read them.
Genesis 1
1Â In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
11Â And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
Genesis 2
17Â But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
My thoughts:
God created the earth and it is really good. Man rapes the land and still this world can repair itself.
God creates every type of vegetation for the use of man. Man finds every conceivable way to abuse the gifts he is given.
God said don't use that plant or you will die. Man runs to it and cultivates this beautiful tabacco plant, and disobeys god by abusing it in every imaginable way.
God warned if you use it you'll die. Man can't stop using it once he starts, and man starts to slowly die.
I'm guilty of misusing the gifts of god. I quit 27 days ago and will no longer abuse this one plant that God placed here on the earth.
'clap' 'clap'
I am honored to be quit with you!!!!
Good stuff Bro.
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He got a big hole in the side of his face and his wife would pick bone and teeth out daily. His jaw quit working and couldn’t open his mouth no problem he had a hole in his face to pour soup into. After feeding him his wife would clean the hole, pour ½ a can of Copenhagen in and cover it with a kotex, and then bandage his whole face back up.
Holy fuck.
Glad to be quit...
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He got a big hole in the side of his face and his wife would pick bone and teeth out daily. His jaw quit working and couldn’t open his mouth no problem he had a hole in his face to pour soup into. After feeding him his wife would clean the hole, pour ½ a can of Copenhagen in and cover it with a kotex, and then bandage his whole face back up.
Holy fuck.
Glad to be quit...
No shit. But you always read/hear/know about the person with lung cancer or emphysema that is on an oxygen tank and still smoking in between hits on the oxygen.
But still, that is just incredible.
I hate going to the doctor too, but I think I would make an exception for a hole in my damn face.
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He got a big hole in the side of his face and his wife would pick bone and teeth out daily. His jaw quit working and couldn’t open his mouth no problem he had a hole in his face to pour soup into. After feeding him his wife would clean the hole, pour ½ a can of Copenhagen in and cover it with a kotex, and then bandage his whole face back up.
Holy fuck.
Glad to be quit...
That is some scary shit !
WOW ! Thanks for sharing...
Shit like this should be shown in schools. Not quite so cool I would imagine.
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My cave is about to take a new twist. God has been part of my quit from the beginning and I will continue to give Him credit for leading me here to KTC.
DISCLAIMER
I don't want to offend anyone and that isn't my intent. I have a very strong faith in God and in no way want to come across as sacrilegious. If you find the things I type offensive don't read them.
Genesis 1
1Â In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
11Â And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
Genesis 2
17Â But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
My thoughts:
God created the earth and it is really good. Man rapes the land and still this world can repair itself.
God creates every type of vegetation for the use of man. Man finds every conceivable way to abuse the gifts he is given.
God said don't use that plant or you will die. Man runs to it and cultivates this beautiful tabacco plant, and disobeys god by abusing it in every imaginable way.
God warned if you use it you'll die. Man can't stop using it once he starts, and man starts to slowly die.
I'm guilty of misusing the gifts of god. I quit 27 days ago and will no longer abuse this one plant that God placed here on the earth.
'clap' 'clap'
I am honored to be quit with you!!!!
Good stuff Bro.
Great Read - Proud to be quit with you. AND, don't put a disclaimer on religious talk. If people don't like it they don't have to read it. That's the problem with our country right now - people are afraid to talk about God and Faith. Should be the other way around - people should be afraid to bash on those that do talk about God and Faith. I am by no means perfect, not even close. But I am a proud Catholic, believe in God and Jesus Christ, and have a strong Faith. Those who don't like it, those who don't feel I should be writing this, those who don't think we should talk about God in public - you all can Kiss My God Loving ASS!!! Told you I'm not perfect.
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Great Stuff WT - I am proud to be apart of this quit group. I would not have gotten through a tough time without you. Thanks.
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My cave is about to take a new twist. God has been part of my quit from the beginning and I will continue to give Him credit for leading me here to KTC.
DISCLAIMER
I don't want to offend anyone and that isn't my intent. I have a very strong faith in God and in no way want to come across as sacrilegious. If you find the things I type offensive don't read them. your right suck-it no PC for me
Genesis 1
1Â In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
11Â And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
Genesis 2
17Â But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
My thoughts:
God created the earth and it is really good. Man rapes the land and still this world can repair itself.
God creates every type of vegetation for the use of man. Man finds every conceivable way to abuse the gifts he is given.
God said don't use that plant or you will die. Man runs to it and cultivates this beautiful tabacco plant, and disobeys god by abusing it in every imaginable way.
God warned if you use it you'll die. Man can't stop using it once he starts, and man starts to slowly die.
I'm guilty of misusing the gifts of god. I quit 27 days ago and will no longer abuse this one plant that God placed here on the earth.
HA - that a boy. Loud and proud - glad to be quit with you. Keep posting - your words are inspirational.
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My cave is about to take a new twist. God has been part of my quit from the beginning and I will continue to give Him credit for leading me here to KTC.
DISCLAIMER
I don't want to offend anyone and that isn't my intent. I have a very strong faith in God and in no way want to come across as sacrilegious. If you find the things I type offensive don't read them. your right suck-it no PC for me
Genesis 1
1Â In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
11Â And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
Genesis 2
17Â But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
My thoughts:
God created the earth and it is really good. Man rapes the land and still this world can repair itself.
God creates every type of vegetation for the use of man. Man finds every conceivable way to abuse the gifts he is given.
God said don't use that plant or you will die. Man runs to it and cultivates this beautiful tobacco plant, and disobeys god by abusing it in every imaginable way.
God warned if you use it you'll die. Man can't stop using it once he starts, and man starts to slowly die.
I'm guilty of misusing the gifts of god. I quit 27 days ago and will no longer abuse this one plant that God placed here on the earth.
HA - that a boy. Loud and proud - glad to be quit with you. Keep posting - your words are inspirational.
BOYS WILL BE BOYS
When I was kicked from the garden of eden and commanded to eat bread by the sweat of my brow; I went forth and planted a garden and like a lot of boys I started planting WILD OATS!!!!
My story begins as a young boy of 12 or 13, as far as I can remember the 1st time I had a direct introduction to the bitch nicotine, I stole a pinch from a older cousins can that was setting around at my grandmothers house. This happened several time over the next year or two. There were more frequent opportunities as I hit 15 or 16. Party, smoke, little pot but the chew soon became my choice. FFA and hanging with a bunch of rough guys mostly older the habit addiction began. What a easy thing to hide from parents and non approving friends. College, more frequent use. Dating my girl I quit. We got married and stayed quit for about 3 yr. We had some stressful and disappointing things happen in our lives and I fell back on my "friend". Soon I was more addicted than ever using more and more. Sneaking around, had cans hid everywhere. Then I got caught!! Our 3 yr old daughter was the first person to ever catch me. She found a can behind the piano and drug it out in the middle of the room. That day actually sucked worse than quiting 4 weeks ago. Embarrassed I promised it was over. I don't think I missed a day.
I can't tell how many other times I got called out on my addiction, ALOT. I had many times that I paused for short periods of time but that was all they were is PAUSES I knew It wouldn't last.
This past 2 years several events have happened that lead me to this site and this decision:
1. 2 yrs ago I had a allergic reaction to NSAIDs, on the ambulance ride I never lose consciousness but my blood pressure dropped to the point the paramedics couldn't read it. I cheated death.
2. last year my wife of 32 yr was having serious health issues. Finally diagnosed with MS.
3. I have suffered from depression most of my life but somewhat under control with meds. Last summer everything quit working. I began thinking every waking moment about killing myself. Then a good friend my age who had real health issues took his life last November.
I did a lot of soul searching! I didn't want to leave my wife to deal with her health issues alone, I really wanted to stay around and watch my 2 grandkids (who along with their parents) had been living with us for 4 yrs. grow up. I realize how selfish I had been, I also suspected that a lot of my depression was brought on by guilt from my ninja dipping!!
I broke down one night and prayed to God like I have never prayed before to help me find a way out of this life of self hatred. I know with out a doubt that God answers prayers. It wasn't 2 hours later that I found KTC. I read everything I could for the next 2 nights, and at about 1:30 am April 1 I flushed my evil villain friend down the toilet where all shit belongs.
I am in the process of clearing my field of the debris left from my wild oat seeding 40 yrs ago. In this process I have found a lot of other things that I have neglected in my field of life or things that I have introduced that aren't conducive to living a good life. I recognized some of them recently with the help of a friend and fellow addict that I met here and I figuratively flushed them down the toilet also.
My path to freedom is just beginning only 27 days old. Today has been another of those blah days but setting and sharing these thought with you or at least reminding myself of them has helped.
My new friends here at KTC, my supportive family and my loving Father in Heaven will see me through this new adventure in my life. Thanks to all
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My cave is about to take a new twist. God has been part of my quit from the beginning and I will continue to give Him credit for leading me here to KTC.
DISCLAIMER
I don't want to offend anyone and that isn't my intent. I have a very strong faith in God and in no way want to come across as sacrilegious. If you find the things I type offensive don't read them. your right suck-it no PC for me
Genesis 1
1Â In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
11Â And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
Genesis 2
17Â But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
My thoughts:
God created the earth and it is really good. Man rapes the land and still this world can repair itself.
God creates every type of vegetation for the use of man. Man finds every conceivable way to abuse the gifts he is given.
God said don't use that plant or you will die. Man runs to it and cultivates this beautiful tobacco plant, and disobeys god by abusing it in every imaginable way.
God warned if you use it you'll die. Man can't stop using it once he starts, and man starts to slowly die.
I'm guilty of misusing the gifts of god. I quit 27 days ago and will no longer abuse this one plant that God placed here on the earth.
HA - that a boy. Loud and proud - glad to be quit with you. Keep posting - your words are inspirational.
BOYS WILL BE BOYS
When I was kicked from the garden of eden and commanded to eat bread by the sweat of my brow; I went forth and planted a garden and like a lot of boys I started planting WILD OATS!!!!
My story begins as a young boy of 12 or 13, as far as I can remember the 1st time I had a direct introduction to the bitch nicotine, I stole a pinch from a older cousins can that was setting around at my grandmothers house. This happened several time over the next year or two. There were more frequent opportunities as I hit 15 or 16. Party, smoke, little pot but the chew soon became my choice. FFA and hanging with a bunch of rough guys mostly older the habit addiction began. What a easy thing to hide from parents and non approving friends. College, more frequent use. Dating my girl I quit. We got married and stayed quit for about 3 yr. We had some stressful and disappointing things happen in our lives and I fell back on my "friend". Soon I was more addicted than ever using more and more. Sneaking around, had cans hid everywhere. Then I got caught!! Our 3 yr old daughter was the first person to ever catch me. She found a can behind the piano and drug it out in the middle of the room. That day actually sucked worse than quiting 4 weeks ago. Embarrassed I promised it was over. I don't think I missed a day.
I can't tell how many other times I got called out on my addiction, ALOT. I had many times that I paused for short periods of time but that was all they were is PAUSES I knew It wouldn't last.
This past 2 years several events have happened that lead me to this site and this decision:
1. 2 yrs ago I had a allergic reaction to NSAIDs, on the ambulance ride I never lose consciousness but my blood pressure dropped to the point the paramedics couldn't read it. I cheated death.
2. last year my wife of 32 yr was having serious health issues. Finally diagnosed with MS.
3. I have suffered from depression most of my life but somewhat under control with meds. Last summer everything quit working. I began thinking every waking moment about killing myself. Then a good friend my age who had real health issues took his life last November.
I did a lot of soul searching! I didn't want to leave my wife to deal with her health issues alone, I really wanted to stay around and watch my 2 grandkids (who along with their parents) had been living with us for 4 yrs. grow up. I realize how selfish I had been, I also suspected that a lot of my depression was brought on by guilt from my ninja dipping!!
I broke down one night and prayed to God like I have never prayed before to help me find a way out of this life of self hatred. I know with out a doubt that God answers prayers. It wasn't 2 hours later that I found KTC. I read everything I could for the next 2 nights, and at about 1:30 am April 1 I flushed my evil villain friend down the toilet where all shit belongs.
I am in the process of clearing my field of the debris left from my wild oat seeding 40 yrs ago. In this process I have found a lot of other things that I have neglected in my field of life or things that I have introduced that aren't conducive to living a good life. I recognized some of them recently with the help of a friend and fellow addict that I met here and I figuratively flushed them down the toilet also.
My path to freedom is just beginning only 27 days old. Today has been another of those blah days but setting and sharing these thought with you or at least reminding myself of them has helped.
My new friends here at KTC, my supportive family and my loving Father in Heaven will see me through this new adventure in my life. Thanks to all
WT57 - great post. Really glad you shared this and I am really glad I woke up this morning, posted roll, and decided to read a little. Woke up really craving. Very proud to be quit with you, you are strong and have battled through and I too believe that God answers prayers. With the big man on our side anything is possible - he will help us through and he will give us what we need for the day. My prayers our with you and all addicts wanting and trying to quit. Have a great weekend - glad you posted and shared, it has helped me - I quit with you today!!!
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WHY QUIT.
He got a big hole in the side of his face and his wife would pick bone and teeth out daily. His jaw quit working and couldnÂ’t open his mouth no problem he had a hole in his face to pour soup into. After feeding him his wife would clean the hole, pour ½ a can of Copenhagen in and cover it with a kotex, and then bandage his whole face back up.Â
I'm with SWJ. Holy Fuck.
A dip covered with a tampon because my face is gone.
Good god almighty. That freaks me out a little bit.
I'll tell you what WT, you keep writing and I'll keep reading.
And keep on reaching out to those younger quitters. Don't let them be stupid.
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Some thoughts that have been going through my mind about posting roll. When you look at those who cave most of the time roll call isn't a top priority.
What is Roll Call?
1. For me roll call is an opportunity to come before my group and make a solemn promise to stay quit with them for the entire day.
2. For me roll call must come early in the day or it is nothing but boasting that I've been quit up to that point of the day without a promise.
3. For this dumb ass addict roll call is a reminder of what I am and where I've come from, a dumb ass addict that has pulled myself up from my addiction.
4. For Me roll call reminds me of how long my journey has been, not just days quit but I am also reminded how long it took me to turn my nicotine use around. (for me it around 14000 days and I will never forget that)
5. Last for me roll call is a opportunity to return to my group and report that I have been faithful to the commitment that I made to them the day before and that I have advance 1 more day.
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Some thoughts that have been going through my mind about posting roll. When you look at those who cave most of the time roll call isn't a top priority.
What is Roll Call?
1. For me roll call is an opportunity to come before my group and make a solemn promise to stay quit with them for the entire day.
2. For me roll call must come early in the day or it is nothing but boasting that I've been quit up to that point of the day without a promise.
3. For this dumb ass addict roll call is a reminder of what I am and where I've come from, a dumb ass addict that has pulled myself up from my addiction.
4. For Me roll call reminds me of how long my journey has been, not just days quit but I am also reminded how long it took me to turn my nicotine use around. (for me it around 14000 days and I will never forget that)
5. Last for me roll call is a opportunity to return to my group and report that I have been faithful to the commitment that I made to them the day before and that I have advance 1 more day.
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Well stated and a good reminder for me. I am mthomas and I agree with this message.
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Some thoughts that have been going through my mind about posting roll. When you look at those who cave most of the time roll call isn't a top priority.
What is Roll Call?
1. For me roll call is an opportunity to come before my group and make a solemn promise to stay quit with them for the entire day.
2. For me roll call must come early in the day or it is nothing but boasting that I've been quit up to that point of the day without a promise.
3. For this dumb ass addict roll call is a reminder of what I am and where I've come from, a dumb ass addict that has pulled myself up from my addiction.
4. For Me roll call reminds me of how long my journey has been, not just days quit but I am also reminded how long it took me to turn my nicotine use around. (for me it around 14000 days and I will never forget that)
5. Last for me roll call is a opportunity to return to my group and report that I have been faithful to the commitment that I made to them the day before and that I have advance 1 more day.
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Well stated and a good reminder for me. I am mthomas and I agree with this message.
Begin with the end in mind. Great job. Great post.
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My continued credit to God for leading me from a disgusting life of deceit, lies and self pity.
I feel much like the Israelites being led by Moses through the wilderness to the promised land. My journey has been almost the same number of years. (at least 38) I've always believed in God but rebelled against a lot of his commandments, and thought that I could do things my way and then easily correct my evil ways. One of my biggest challenges in life is the Exodus 20:3 Thou shalt have no other gods before me. for most of the past 38 years I've worshipped another god, Tobacco. Often I have thought about forsaking this god but there was always a reason to put it off to another day. That day just never came. Days turned years, years turn to decades, life rolls on. Soon a life time has passed. Finally the day did come it was 34 days ago. I found the strength within myself and from the support of some very special friends that I have never met, never even heard most of their voices. Again I have got to give credit where credit is due. 1st--I thank God for giving the strength to abandon my evil worship. 2nd I thank him for leading my search for help to the steps of KTC. 3rd I thank each and everyone here who's stories of inspiration, companionship, integrity and pure intestinal fortitude has carried me into this promised land of QUIT. Everyday I will be at the steps of My July Quit Group and humble myself and swear an oath to be nicotine free for that day, nothing more, nothing less. Thank You Friends
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Great job brother. You're on the path man. We're all walking with you.
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My continued credit to God for leading me from a disgusting life of deceit, lies and self pity.
I feel much like the Israelites being led by Moses through the wilderness to the promised land. My journey has been almost the same number of years. (at least 38) I've always believed in God but rebelled against a lot of his commandments, and thought that I could do things my way and then easily correct my evil ways. One of my biggest challenges in life is the Exodus 20:3 Thou shalt have no other gods before me. for most of the past 38 years I've worshipped another god, Tobacco. Often I have thought about forsaking this god but there was always a reason to put it off to another day. That day just never came. Days turned years, years turn to decades, life rolls on. Soon a life time has passed. Finally the day did come it was 34 days ago. I found the strength within myself and from the support of some very special friends that I have never met, never even heard most of their voices. Again I have got to give credit where credit is due. 1st--I thank God for giving the strength to abandon my evil worship. 2nd I thank him for leading my search for help to the steps of KTC. 3rd I thank each and everyone here who's stories of inspiration, companionship, integrity and pure intestinal fortitude has carried me into this promised land of QUIT. Everyday I will be at the steps of My July Quit Group and humble myself and swear an oath to be nicotine free for that day, nothing more, nothing less. Thank You Friends
Great post, love it. We cannot do this alone. I quit with you today - have a great weekend.
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Holy shit! 33 days since my last nic dream, and I thought it was bad. This dream she brought the entire QLF crew to taunt me with a open can of cope. I wanted that do bad!! Woke 3 times from my dream sweating, everytime I'd lay back down the damn dream immediately started back up. The only good thing about this dream: I STAYED QUIT. I know the QLF crew are a rough bunch but they'd never do the shit to a person that they did to me in my dream, it was the bitch!!
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Holy shit! 33 days since my last nic dream, and I thought it was bad. This dream she brought the entire QLF crew to taunt me with a open can of cope. I wanted that do bad!! Woke 3 times from my dream sweating, everytime I'd lay back down the damn dream immediately started back up. The only good thing about this dream: I STAYED QUIT. I know the QLF crew are a rough bunch but they'd never do the shit to a person that they did to me in my dream, it was the bitch!!
QLF my brother!!!!
This is a definte sign that you are indeed kicking Nic's ass!!!
Keep up the badass quit
Stay Focused
Stay Strong
Stay QUIT!
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When will the damn sore tongue go away? Mine just keeps getting worse! Seeing the dentist this week.
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When will the damn sore tongue go away? Mine just keeps getting worse! Seeing the dentist this week.
Do you have actual sores on your tongue or the whole thing is sore? I don't have either, but my mouth has been "shedding" the past few days now.
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When will the damn sore tongue go away? Mine just keeps getting worse! Seeing the dentist this week.
Do you have actual sores on your tongue or the whole thing is sore? I don't have either, but my mouth has been "shedding" the past few days now.
Fricking tongue looks like the grandcanyon. My mouth is shedding too. But tongue just killing me hard to eat. Feels like I took a electric sander to the surface. Actually feels like when I was a little kid and put it on a cold pipe and then pulled it off.
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I nearly had a melt down. Those that know me, I have a 4 yr old shadow most days (grandson). Well he proudly told me haha "locked you out of the pickup grampa! Well I thought that's cute. After asking a dozen times "where's the keys" he finally told me "under the chips"--what chips? "me show you" pointing inside! Yep keys were locked inside! My mild nicless rage couldn't be released on a 4 yr old. 2 hr later w/ help from his mom were all laughing and the alarm is blareing.
Got a fortune cookie last nigh said "no matter what your
Past has been you have a spotless future". Well at least a spitless day.
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I nearly had a melt down. Those that know me, I have a 4 yr old shadow most days (grandson). Well he proudly told me haha "locked you out of the pickup grampa! Well I thought that's cute. After asking a dozen times "where's the keys" he finally told me "under the chips"--what chips? "me show you" pointing inside! Yep keys were locked inside! My mild nicless rage couldn't be released on a 4 yr old. 2 hr later w/ help from his mom were all laughing and the alarm is blareing.
Got a fortune cookie last nigh said "no matter what your
Past has been you have a spotless future". Well at least a spotless day.
Good stuff bro!
I have had those near melt downs all the way thru my quit and I am starting to get the realization that most of the things I would have had melt downs on are not worth the effort!
I unfortunately have had the melt downs where my kids were involved to many times to count ..... I blame the nic-bitch and myself for losing control but now while eliminating the nic-bitch I am dealing with many things way better than before!
Stay Strong, Focused QUIT!!!!!!
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I nearly had a melt down. Those that know me, I have a 4 yr old shadow most days (grandson). Well he proudly told me haha "locked you out of the pickup grampa! Well I thought that's cute. After asking a dozen times "where's the keys" he finally told me "under the chips"--what chips? "me show you" pointing inside! Yep keys were locked inside! My mild nicless rage couldn't be released on a 4 yr old. 2 hr later w/ help from his mom were all laughing and the alarm is blareing.
Got a fortune cookie last nigh said "no matter what your
Past has been you have a spotless future". Well at least a spotless day.
Good story WT, and good on you for keeping it together.
Stay quit, and your quit will keep getting stronger. Proud to be quit with you bro!
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I think addicts in general are the very best liers! I am, or think I am. I can come her and talk trash with you younger guys, gets my testosterone out of retirement. I can push the real me and my real feelings back into some secluded place in my mind. Most of the time the opposite thing happens I can say things here I never say to people around me. I don't handle stress well and never have. What I'm trying to get out is; the last couple weeks I've been fuckin scared--(I know what to expect) and it is probably OK. My mouth is killing me, my tongue hurts so bad it's hard to eat. At first I thought it was just healing, then after couple more weeks thought it was the fake shit so I backed off it. Getting a cleaning and check today along with a reaming from the hygienist ( last time she asked how often I brushed? I told the bitch "everytime I come in here". Guys thanks for listening to my rant! I also feel your support everyday it helps to keep me going.
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I think addicts in general are the very best liers! I am, or think I am. I can come her and talk trash with you younger guys, gets my testosterone out of retirement. I can push the real me and my real feelings back into some secluded place in my mind. Most of the time the opposite thing happens I can say things here I never say to people around me. I don't handle stress well and never have. What I'm trying to get out is; the last couple weeks I've been fuckin scared--(I know what to expect) and it is probably OK. My mouth is killing me, my tongue hurts so bad it's hard to eat. At first I thought it was just healing, then after couple more weeks thought it was the fake shit so I backed off it. Getting a cleaning and check today along with a reaming from the hygienist ( last time she asked how often I brushed? I told the bitch "everytime I come in here". Guys thanks for listening to my rant! I also feel your support everyday it helps to keep me going.
I feel your pain. I was freaking out too waiting to get to a dentist. Odds are, your OK. Stay strong and get that visit over with and continue with the quit.
Hang in there and keep up the posts. I am enjoying them immensely and they make my quit all that much better.
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I think addicts in general are the very best liers! I am, or think I am. I can come her and talk trash with you younger guys, gets my testosterone out of retirement. I can push the real me and my real feelings back into some secluded place in my mind. Most of the time the opposite thing happens I can say things here I never say to people around me. I don't handle stress well and never have. What I'm trying to get out is; the last couple weeks I've been fuckin scared--(I know what to expect) and it is probably OK. My mouth is killing me, my tongue hurts so bad it's hard to eat. At first I thought it was just healing, then after couple more weeks thought it was the fake shit so I backed off it. Getting a cleaning and check today along with a reaming from the hygienist ( last time she asked how often I brushed? I told the bitch "everytime I come in here". Guys thanks for listening to my rant! I also feel your support everyday it helps to keep me going.
I feel your pain. I was freaking out too waiting to get to a dentist. Odds are, your OK. Stay strong and get that visit over with and continue with the quit.
Hang in there and keep up the posts. I am enjoying them immensely and they make my quit all that much better.
This is exactly the place to rant brother!!!
The trip to the dentist was the final smack up along side the head 'stick' I needed to quit, when I saw my teeth and gums after they took pictures... 'puking' .... I havent even thought about chewing since!
Anyway keep the great posts comming and stay quit brother!!
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I think addicts in general are the very best liers! I am, or think I am. I can come her and talk trash with you younger guys, gets my testosterone out of retirement. I can push the real me and my real feelings back into some secluded place in my mind. Most of the time the opposite thing happens I can say things here I never say to people around me. I don't handle stress well and never have. What I'm trying to get out is; the last couple weeks I've been fuckin scared--(I know what to expect) and it is probably OK. My mouth is killing me, my tongue hurts so bad it's hard to eat. At first I thought it was just healing, then after couple more weeks thought it was the fake shit so I backed off it. Getting a cleaning and check today along with a reaming from the hygienist ( last time she asked how often I brushed? I told the bitch "everytime I come in here". Guys thanks for listening to my rant! I also feel your support everyday it helps to keep me going.
I feel your pain. I was freaking out too waiting to get to a dentist. Odds are, your OK. Stay strong and get that visit over with and continue with the quit.
Hang in there and keep up the posts. I am enjoying them immensely and they make my quit all that much better.
This is exactly the place to rant brother!!!
The trip to the dentist was the final smack up along side the head 'stick' I needed to quit, when I saw my teeth and gums after they took pictures... 'puking' .... I havent even thought about chewing since!
Anyway keep the great posts comming and stay quit brother!!
I'm scared most the time too. I try to talk a good game. I'm like Owen Wilson in Shanghai Noon. The scene where he squares off with the bad guy. Its going to be a shoot out....
Owen out loud says something tough, but then you hear is thoughts, "oh man what am I doing, this guy is going to kill me?"
I guess all I am trying to say is that I can relate. However, I spent so much time chewing and so much energy worrying and it didn't benefit me.
It seems to always work out. Worry about facts and reality. Not hypothetical.
Easier said than done. I sure can related though. I am tired of fear paralyzing me though. Staying quit has shown me that we have so much more ability to succeed and survive....than we think.
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1 down 2 ya go! Dentist visit OK! Now road trip, wife is driving I WANT A CHEW! Then the in-laws! Maybe just shoot me! I'm going to have to drive we're pulling a trailer we're gonna die, the wind blowing damn hard.
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1 down 2 ya go! Dentist visit OK! Now road trip, wife is driving I WANT A CHEW! Then the in-laws! Maybe just shoot me! I'm going to have to drive we're pulling a trailer we're gonna die, the wind blowing damn hard.
You don't want a chew, unless you want my boot in your ass Haha.
You got this, road trips and inlaws have given me my biggest craves to date. Hope you got fake shit for the road and alcoholic drinks for the inlaws
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1 down 2 ya go! Dentist visit OK! Now road trip, wife is driving I WANT A CHEW! Then the in-laws! Maybe just shoot me! I'm going to have to drive we're pulling a trailer we're gonna die, the wind blowing damn hard.
You don't want a chew, unless you want my boot in your ass Haha.
You got this, road trips and inlaws have given me my biggest craves to date. Hope you got fake shit for the road and alcoholic drinks for the inlaws
I have listed quite a few alternatives in a prior thread if you are interested Wt :D
Seriously, u got this. Remember the constants:
1. Wind is gonna blow
2. Ur gonna panic when u ride with the wife
3. In-laws are, well, in-laws. Something about "if you can't shoot them..."
4. Craves wil come and go, but our quits are eternal (at least for today).
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1 down 2 ya go! Dentist visit OK! Now road trip, wife is driving I WANT A CHEW! Then the in-laws! Maybe just shoot me! I'm going to have to drive we're pulling a trailer we're gonna die, the wind blowing damn hard.
You don't want a chew, unless you want my boot in your ass Haha.
You got this, road trips and inlaws have given me my biggest craves to date. Hope you got fake shit for the road and alcoholic drinks for the inlaws
I have listed quite a few alternatives in a prior thread if you are interested Wt :D
Seriously, u got this. Remember the constants:
1. Wind is gonna blow
2. Ur gonna panic when u ride with the wife
3. In-laws are, well, in-laws. Something about "if you can't shoot them..."
4. Craves wil come and go, but our quits are eternal (at least for today).
I sure don't want your foot up my ass! But I don't need that threat to keep me quit, I'm good just venting.
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1 down 2 ya go! Dentist visit OK! Now road trip, wife is driving I WANT A CHEW! Then the in-laws! Maybe just shoot me! I'm going to have to drive we're pulling a trailer we're gonna die, the wind blowing damn hard.
You don't want a chew, unless you want my boot in your ass Haha.
You got this, road trips and inlaws have given me my biggest craves to date. Hope you got fake shit for the road and alcoholic drinks for the inlaws
I have listed quite a few alternatives in a prior thread if you are interested Wt :D
Seriously, u got this. Remember the constants:
1. Wind is gonna blow
2. Ur gonna panic when u ride with the wife
3. In-laws are, well, in-laws. Something about "if you can't shoot them..."
4. Craves wil come and go, but our quits are eternal (at least for today).
I sure don't want your foot up my ass! But I don't need that threat to keep me quit, I'm good just venting.
It wasn't a threat bud, just messing around with ya.
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1 down 2 ya go! Dentist visit OK! Now road trip, wife is driving I WANT A CHEW! Then the in-laws! Maybe just shoot me! I'm going to have to drive we're pulling a trailer we're gonna die, the wind blowing damn hard.
You don't want a chew, unless you want my boot in your ass Haha.
You got this, road trips and inlaws have given me my biggest craves to date. Hope you got fake shit for the road and alcoholic drinks for the inlaws
I have listed quite a few alternatives in a prior thread if you are interested Wt :
Seriously, u got this. Remember the constants:
1. Wind is gonna blow
2. Ur gonna panic when u ride with the wife
3. In-laws are, well, in-laws. Something about "if you can't shoot them..."
4. Craves wil come and go, but our quits are eternal (at least for today).
I sure don't want your foot up my ass! But I don't need that threat to keep me quit, I'm good just venting.
It wasn't a threat bud, just messing around with ya.
It better be a promise!
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My update!
Dentist visit: Not what I expected, said the inflammation of my tongue is probably a viral or yeast infection--- holy shit I know where that came from--- 'Y' 'Y' 'Kiss' Dr. Said avoid anything that seems to make it worse. Shit that's as hard as my quit!
On the road: made the 5 hr trip no one is dead and I'm still quit!!
In-laws?? I left the house for a couple hours ( that would have been for my alone time with the bitch) in the past! But not this time. It was filled with lots of nic talk but no partaking.
Now all I have left to do is repeat the trip and in-laws tomorrow.
I QLF today and am making this late night post here to brag about it. 'na na' 'na na' 'na na'
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My update!
Dentist visit: Not what I expected, said the inflammation of my tongue is probably a viral or yeast infection--- holy shit I know where that came from--- 'Y' 'Y' 'Kiss' Dr. Said avoid anything that seems to make it worse. Shit that's as hard as my quit!
On the road:Â made the 5 hr trip no one is dead and I'm still quit!!
In-laws?? I left the house for a couple hours ( that would have been for my alone time with the bitch) in the past! But not this time. It was filled with lots of nic talk but no partaking.
Now all I have left to do is repeat the trip and in-laws tomorrow.
I QLF today and am making this late night post here to brag about it. 'na na'Â 'na na'Â 'na na'
Don't meet any guys on the internet, then go out for pie and I think you're in the clear.
I can't believe it took me so long to quit. The joy of the quit beats any buzz that is chased with a shot of Guilt and a squeeze of lie.
I Heart the Quit Life!!!!
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My update!
Dentist visit: Not what I expected, said the inflammation of my tongue is probably a viral or yeast infection--- holy shit I know where that came from--- 'Y' 'Y' 'Kiss'  Dr. Said avoid anything that seems to make it worse. Shit that's as hard as my quit!
On the road:Â made the 5 hr trip no one is dead and I'm still quit!!
In-laws?? I left the house for a couple hours ( that would have been for my alone time with the bitch) in the past! But not this time. It was filled with lots of nic talk but no partaking.
Now all I have left to do is repeat the trip and in-laws tomorrow.
I QLF today and am making this late night post here to brag about it. 'na na'Â Â 'na na'Â 'na na'
Don't meet any guys on the internet, then go out for pie and I think you're in the clear.
I can't believe it took me so long to quit. The joy of the quit beats any buzz that is chased with a shot of Guilt and a squeeze of lie.
I Heart the Quit Life!!!!
Yea I met this guy I found online, my mother-in-law is worried about my safety, (me too). We meet up late at night for a rendezvous (sounds ghey, it's not). Now I have a face to put with all the shit talk. Never could have been prepared for reality: 5'5", 230#, skinhead, no teeth and Jamaican!
Got you first MT before you exposed the real me!
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My update!
Dentist visit: Not what I expected, said the inflammation of my tongue is probably a viral or yeast infection--- holy shit I know where that came from--- 'Y' 'Y' 'Kiss'  Dr. Said avoid anything that seems to make it worse. Shit that's as hard as my quit!
On the road:Â made the 5 hr trip no one is dead and I'm still quit!!
In-laws?? I left the house for a couple hours ( that would have been for my alone time with the bitch) in the past! But not this time. It was filled with lots of nic talk but no partaking.
Now all I have left to do is repeat the trip and in-laws tomorrow.
I QLF today and am making this late night post here to brag about it. 'na na'Â Â 'na na'Â 'na na'
Don't meet any guys on the internet, then go out for pie and I think you're in the clear.
I can't believe it took me so long to quit. The joy of the quit beats any buzz that is chased with a shot of Guilt and a squeeze of lie.
I Heart the Quit Life!!!!
Yea I met this guy I found online, my mother-in-law is worried about my safety, (me too). We meet up late at night for a rendezvous (sounds ghey, it's not). Now I have a face to put with all the shit talk. Never could have been prepared for reality: 5'5", 230#, skinhead, no teeth and Jamaican!
Got you first MT before you exposed the real me!
holdon....hoooold on.......
A YEAST INFECTION ON YOUR TOUNGE!?!?!?!?!
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
That is the funniest shit I have ever heard
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My update!
Dentist visit: Not what I expected, said the inflammation of my tongue is probably a viral or yeast infection--- holy shit I know where that came from--- 'Y' 'Y' 'Kiss'  Dr. Said avoid anything that seems to make it worse. Shit that's as hard as my quit!
On the road:Â made the 5 hr trip no one is dead and I'm still quit!!
In-laws?? I left the house for a couple hours ( that would have been for my alone time with the bitch) in the past! But not this time. It was filled with lots of nic talk but no partaking.
Now all I have left to do is repeat the trip and in-laws tomorrow.
I QLF today and am making this late night post here to brag about it. 'na na'Â Â 'na na'Â 'na na'
Don't meet any guys on the internet, then go out for pie and I think you're in the clear.
I can't believe it took me so long to quit. The joy of the quit beats any buzz that is chased with a shot of Guilt and a squeeze of lie.
I Heart the Quit Life!!!!
Yea I met this guy I found online, my mother-in-law is worried about my safety, (me too). We meet up late at night for a rendezvous (sounds ghey, it's not). Now I have a face to put with all the shit talk. Never could have been prepared for reality: 5'5", 230#, skinhead, no teeth and Jamaican!
Got you first MT before you exposed the real me!
holdon....hoooold on.......
A YEAST INFECTION ON YOUR TOUNGE!?!?!?!?!
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
That is the funniest shit I have ever heard
Is pretty damn funny now, but I thought it was the big C for sure! I was CUNT! No more pussy eatin for me for awhile.
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My update!
Dentist visit: Not what I expected, said the inflammation of my tongue is probably a viral or yeast infection--- holy shit I know where that came from--- 'Y' 'Y' 'Kiss'  Dr. Said avoid anything that seems to make it worse. Shit that's as hard as my quit!
On the road:Â made the 5 hr trip no one is dead and I'm still quit!!
In-laws?? I left the house for a couple hours ( that would have been for my alone time with the bitch) in the past! But not this time. It was filled with lots of nic talk but no partaking.
Now all I have left to do is repeat the trip and in-laws tomorrow.
I QLF today and am making this late night post here to brag about it. 'na na'Â Â 'na na'Â 'na na'
Don't meet any guys on the internet, then go out for pie and I think you're in the clear.
I can't believe it took me so long to quit. The joy of the quit beats any buzz that is chased with a shot of Guilt and a squeeze of lie.
I Heart the Quit Life!!!!
Yea I met this guy I found online, my mother-in-law is worried about my safety, (me too). We meet up late at night for a rendezvous (sounds ghey, it's not). Now I have a face to put with all the shit talk. Never could have been prepared for reality: 5'5", 230#, skinhead, no teeth and Jamaican!
Got you first MT before you exposed the real me!
holdon....hoooold on.......
A YEAST INFECTION ON YOUR TOUNGE!?!?!?!?!
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
That is the funniest shit I have ever heard
Is pretty damn funny now, but I thought it was the big C for sure! I was CUNT! No more pussy eatin for me for awhile.
:o Stay away from the homemade bread and rolls at WT house!
'ash' WT asks for black bottom pie.
(Scene takes place at a village inn in Utah)
Waitress: "What is Black Bottom Pie"
MT: "yeah I never heard of it"
WT: "It has rum in it"
Waitress: "we don't have it"
MT: "You forget you're in Utah?"
WT: "Forgot its a dry county"
WT: "I'll have the strawberry crepes"
MT: "What the fuck? Utah isn't France either! WT, you need to go to the powder room and put on some lip stick while your at it?"
MT: "How are the crepes and why does it look like you have a loaf of bread on your tongue?"
'crackup' aw fun times.
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I fucking caved--- again!!! That's right my good cave I caved too the peer pressure of KTC! Yesterday I got hit by the blahs again, started felling sorry for WT. I started thinking further down the road than today. Then I saw a couple of real caves and the reality of how fragile our quit can be set in. Last night I did what I do best, fucking hide behind a computer screen and talk mostly truth, I rambled to anyone with a open inbox. Today is a new day, I posted early, made my promise to stay quit for today and I will. My dumb ass thoughts about 6, 7, 8 months down the road are gone. Oh yea before anyone rips me a new one I got my day wrong when I posted roll (just a stupid dumb ass mistake) believe me I remember and cherish every fuckin day I've been quit. Thanks Cmark for catching me. Never thought it possible that I could make friends with total unseen strangers like you, how wrong I was, you are fast becoming some of my closest friends in this phase of my life.
Thank you, and thank God
WT
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I fucking caved--- again!!! That's right my good cave I caved too the peer pressure of KTC! Yesterday I got hit by the blahs again, started felling sorry for WT. I started thinking further down the road than today. Then I saw a couple of real caves and the reality of how fragile our quit can be set in. Last night I did what I do best, fucking hide behind a computer screen and talk mostly truth, I rambled to anyone with a open inbox. Today is a new day, I posted early, made my promise to stay quit for today and I will. My dumb ass thoughts about 6, 7, 8 months down the road are gone. Oh yea before anyone rips me a new one I got my day wrong when I posted roll (just a stupid dumb ass mistake) believe me I remember and cherish every fuckin day I've been quit. Thanks Cmark for catching me. Never thought it possible that I could make friends with total unseen strangers like you, how wrong I was, you are fast becoming some of my closest friends in this phase of my life.
Thank you, and thank God
WT
Thanks for being here for me as well. We have a strong support group in July! I am battling more than the nic demon this week so god willing I will be strong and fight off any urges that may arrise.
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I fucking caved--- again!!! That's right my good cave I caved too the peer pressure of KTC! Yesterday I got hit by the blahs again, started felling sorry for WT. I started thinking further down the road than today. Then I saw a couple of real caves and the reality of how fragile our quit can be set in. Last night I did what I do best, fucking hide behind a computer screen and talk mostly truth, I rambled to anyone with a open inbox. Today is a new day, I posted early, made my promise to stay quit for today and I will. My dumb ass thoughts about 6, 7, 8 months down the road are gone. Oh yea before anyone rips me a new one I got my day wrong when I posted roll (just a stupid dumb ass mistake) believe me I remember and cherish every fuckin day I've been quit. Thanks Cmark for catching me. Never thought it possible that I could make friends with total unseen strangers like you, how wrong I was, you are fast becoming some of my closest friends in this phase of my life.
Thank you, and thank God
WT
Thanks for being here for me as well. We have a strong support group in July! I am battling more than the nic demon this week so god willing I will be strong and fight off any urges that may arrise.
:D
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My adult life as a ninja dipper!
I would guess that I only got caught 5 times dipping in over 38 yrs. what a proud record to celebrate. The first time was my 3 yr old daughter ( she's 31 now). All of the other times were by my wife, it would be more but she gave up on questioning me, Always the same thing-- I'm quiting, oh just had a bad day, no I'm not dippin very often. Etc etc etc ...
Admitting what a prick I've been is really a overwhelmingly difficult thing to admit. The day I quit I set my wife down confessed all my lies to her, I promised her I quit that day. Everyday I have gone before my July quit group and pledged my quit, also each day I have held my wife's hand, looked into her eyes and made the same promise to her.
Through all of my lies there have been two unfooled observers of my addiction: I have always known what a stupid prick I've been, and Nothing can be hidden from God!
It feels so good to face life knowing that I'm honest with WT, my wife, each of you total strangers and God.
My new guilt free life is so awesome!!
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My adult life as a ninja dipper!
I would guess that I only got caught 5 times dipping in over 38 yrs. what a proud record to celebrate. The first time was my 3 yr old daughter ( she's 31 now). All of the other times were by my wife, it would be more but she gave up on questioning me, Always the same thing-- I'm quiting, oh just had a bad day, no I'm not dippin very often. Etc etc etc ...
Admitting what a prick I've been is really a overwhelmingly difficult thing to admit. The day I quit I set my wife down confessed all my lies to her, I promised her I quit that day. Everyday I have gone before my July quit group and pledged my quit, also each day I have held my wife's hand, looked into her eyes and made the same promise to her.
Through all of my lies there have been two unfooled observers of my addiction: I have always known what a stupid prick I've been, and Nothing can be hidden from God!
It feels so good to face life knowing that I'm honest with WT, my wife, each of you total strangers and God.
My new guilt free life is so awesome!!
Great post WT - very proud to be quitting with you. Keep up the good work my brother and thanks for sharing. That is an awesome post.
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Just dropping some props. You sir, are a fucker that brings the quit.
Glad you're here man.
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One of the faithful quitters that I look up to for support in my QUIT is MThomas, He often says that he had a "ah ha moment".
Well I just got in from a long day and have been trying to avoid thinking past today, (for some reason this is a real problem for me). In the last couple of days I had a conversation with one of you, I don't even know who it was now, but I had mentioned that I had quit alcohol in October, 1979 after several years of serious abuse. I don't know when the last time I thought of having a drink, its been a very long time (at least 25 yr)
My ah ha moment---My nicotine addiction is the same as my alcohol addiction, one day at a time and eventually I won't think about a dip. In fact alcohol NEVER tempts me, I never think about it, I never romance the Idea of a drink, It is not even a thought even when surrounded by it and that wasn't always the case. For several years I just about died every time I was around alcohol, but I knew that 1 drink and I'd be right back into my same old pattern of being drunk most everyday.
The reason that this has taken me so long to associate my alcoholism with my nicotine addiction is that; even though I know I'm still an alcoholic I no longer think about it. (it is in the past) Until I no longer think about nicotine, I will Quit Like Fuck one day at a time no matter how long that takes!!
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One of the faithful quitters that I look up to for support in my QUIT is MThomas, He often says that he had a "ah ha moment".
Well I just got in from a long day and have been trying to avoid thinking past today, (for some reason this is a real problem for me). In the last couple of days I had a conversation with one of you, I don't even know who it was now, but I had mentioned that I had quit alcohol in October, 1979 after several years of serious abuse. I don't know when the last time I thought of having a drink, its been a very long time (at least 25 yr)
My ah ha moment---My nicotine addiction is the same as my alcohol addiction, one day at a time and eventually I won't think about a dip. In fact alcohol NEVER tempts me, I never think about it, I never romance the Idea of a drink, It is not even a thought even when surrounded by it and that wasn't always the case. For several years I just about died every time I was around alcohol, but I knew that 1 drink and I'd be right back into my same old pattern of being drunk most everyday.
The reason that this has taken me so long to associate my alcoholism with my nicotine addiction is that; even though I know I'm still an alcoholic I no longer think about it. (it is in the past) Until I no longer think about nicotine, I will Quit Like Fuck one day at a time no matter how long that takes!!
Awesome stuff WT. You are one hell of a quitter and I am proud to be beating the shit out of this addiction with you. I may be a few days in front of you but you are definitely a great leader in this quit. I draw a lot of strength from your posts. Keep up the good work and thanks again for sharing.
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Day 50 a road marker? Day 100 a milestone? 1 year another milestone?
These questions have been plaguing my mind this week. I have been comparing my quit to my life.
Life.......................Quit
Birth-------------------Day 1-------------- a beginning
1st steps--------------Day 50-------------a good start
1st day of school-----Day 100-----------a road marker
Out on your own-----1 yr-----------------a milestone
marriage kids-----
Grandkids-------------
Retirement------------
Death------------------Death(still quit)--------------Triumph
My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it. I don't know what the life expectancy of a quit addict in my demographics is, I have longevity genes so lets say 80 yrs old. That means that I am way past 1/2 way to DEAD. I have had many side trips, detours, road markers and milestones in my life. Today I consider 50 days ago (the day I quit) as one of the milestones in my life that I will cherish with some of the bigger events in my life (such as marriage, birth of daughter, birth of grandkids etc.). If I put myself at the end, at death, I don't think day 50 or day 100 will even be listed on the event calendar, Maybe I'm wrong but I don't think so.
Looking down the road into the future has been one of the more difficult aspects to deal with in my quit! When I think long term I "CAVE". I'm strong, my quit is strong, I'm gaining something I've never had "integrity", I will not cave if I continue to quit 1 day at a time.
Another scary aspect of 50 or 100 days quit is when I compare it to the past: I've been a addict for over 14,000 days I've been alive a little over 20,000 days. Compare that to 100 days-----not even a drop in the bucket. So another lesson to be learned the past can also be overwhelming, thinking of it sows seeds of "CAVE".
My conclusion is: THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS TODAY.
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My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it.
I can relate WT. There are times when I am totally underwhelmed by it because it is in fact, just another day. No different than any other day remaining in my life, a day where I must be quit one day at a time. I think many people feel that way. Then, at other times, I look forward to it with great anticipation. That usually happens when I am overwhelmed by how happy I am to be quit and how much better life is being quit.
Thanks for sharing your trepidation about your feelings for 100 days. I have that same feeling sometimes and your conclusion is right. Focus on today. If you stay quit, then that is worthy of celebration.
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My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it.
I can relate WT. There are times when I am totally underwhelmed by it because it is in fact, just another day. No different than any other day remaining in my life, a day where I must be quit one day at a time. I think many people feel that way. Then, at other times, I look forward to it with great anticipation. That usually happens when I am overwhelmed by how happy I am to be quit and how much better life is being quit.
Thanks for sharing your trepidation about your feelings for 100 days. I have that same feeling sometimes and your conclusion is right. Focus on today. If you stay quit, then that is worthy of celebration.
Great words guys!
I have made the HOF just this past Wednesday adn the funny thing is .... well while its a great milestone and somewhat of a good accomplishment it is in fact just another day.
We are all addicts and will need this site and its accountability many more times after the we hit the hall!
I remember a quote "You are not here on accident" It is very true for all of us!
Stay focused and enjoy the accomplishment, dont let the sneaky nic bitch creep into your hear and try to down play your accomplishment!
Quit on QUITERS!!!!
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My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it.
I can relate WT. There are times when I am totally underwhelmed by it because it is in fact, just another day. No different than any other day remaining in my life, a day where I must be quit one day at a time. I think many people feel that way. Then, at other times, I look forward to it with great anticipation. That usually happens when I am overwhelmed by how happy I am to be quit and how much better life is being quit.
Thanks for sharing your trepidation about your feelings for 100 days. I have that same feeling sometimes and your conclusion is right. Focus on today. If you stay quit, then that is worthy of celebration.
Great words guys!
I have made the HOF just this past Wednesday adn the funny thing is .... well while its a great milestone and somewhat of a good accomplishment it is in fact just another day.
We are all addicts and will need this site and its accountability many more times after the we hit the hall!
I remember a quote "You are not here on accident" It is very true for all of us!
Stay focused and enjoy the accomplishment, dont let the sneaky nic bitch creep into your hear and try to down play your accomplishment!
Quit on QUITERS!!!!
It is in fact just another day, no more important or no less important then yesterday or tomorrow. Some people, like myself, need these milestones for an extra motivation. I did my HoF up right, wrote the speech, bought the coin, a wristband and when I hit the second floor, you can bet your ass I'm getting the 200 chip! It's all how you look at it, don't get complacent with your quit, that's why I look forward to these milestone days personally.
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My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it.
I can relate WT. There are times when I am totally underwhelmed by it because it is in fact, just another day. No different than any other day remaining in my life, a day where I must be quit one day at a time. I think many people feel that way. Then, at other times, I look forward to it with great anticipation. That usually happens when I am overwhelmed by how happy I am to be quit and how much better life is being quit.
Thanks for sharing your trepidation about your feelings for 100 days. I have that same feeling sometimes and your conclusion is right. Focus on today. If you stay quit, then that is worthy of celebration.
Great words guys!
I have made the HOF just this past Wednesday adn the funny thing is .... well while its a great milestone and somewhat of a good accomplishment it is in fact just another day.
We are all addicts and will need this site and its accountability many more times after the we hit the hall!
I remember a quote "You are not here on accident" It is very true for all of us!
Stay focused and enjoy the accomplishment, dont let the sneaky nic bitch creep into your hear and try to down play your accomplishment!
Quit on QUITERS!!!!
It is in fact just another day, no more important or no less important then yesterday or tomorrow. Some people, like myself, need these milestones for an extra motivation. I did my HoF up right, wrote the speech, bought the coin, a wristband and when I hit the second floor, you can bet your ass I'm getting the 200 chip! It's all how you look at it, don't get complacent with your quit, that's why I look forward to these milestone days personally.
Just throwing a couple pennies...
I truly look at each day as a milestone. Its a day where I can face my addiction in the eyes and say I'm stronger than you. I have control over my body and mind. No longer am I complacent. Posting roll each day really feels like screaming "I QUIT" from the top of a building. Traffic stops. Birds get distracted and crash in buildings. Children drop their ice cream cones. That's right bitches. I own this day. Its mine. Day 1 is a tremendous accomplishment. The power in putting down your word and believing with all your being that you can fight through the pain, that you are strong enough, no matter what, to find a way to keep your word is amazing. Its just as much an accomplishment as day 100. Keep fighting.
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My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it.
It does seem a little underwhelming at times. Maybe that's a good thing ? Good job hanging tough.
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Day 53 Blah Blah Blah!!!
I don't know rather the feelings I'm having are quit related or not. I've just been feeling rather down and don't give a shit attitude (not my quit it is still #1). I was taking a short break from work and I just fell asleep, now before I get back to work I thought that I'd pose a question: As we reprogram our lives to live without Nicotine -------------Hell I don't even know what I want to ask. I feel like I'm back in the 1st week fog. Does anyone else have this big funk around day 50??? Any ideas of how to shake it?? I don't even want to spend that much time here online, and that has been a huge part of my life and quit for the past 50 days!!
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Day 53 Blah Blah Blah!!!
I don't know rather the feelings I'm having are quit related or not. I've just been feeling rather down and don't give a shit attitude (not my quit it is still #1).  I was taking a short break from work and I just fell asleep, now before I get back to work I thought that I'd pose a question: As we reprogram our lives to live without Nicotine -------------Hell I don't even know what I want to ask. I feel like I'm back in the 1st week fog. Does anyone else have this big funk around day 50??? Any ideas of how to shake it?? I don't even want to spend that much time here online, and that has been a huge part of my life and quit for the past 50 days!!
I have some great news for you WT, this is absolutely normal! You are well on your way to a pain free and funk free quit. I had some real bad funks through day 220+/- but haven't had any since (but know there will be more occational funks in the future). The "I don't give a shits" will pass.
-NDY 267 days of freedom
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Day 53 Blah Blah Blah!!!
I don't know rather the feelings I'm having are quit related or not. I've just been feeling rather down and don't give a shit attitude (not my quit it is still #1).  I was taking a short break from work and I just fell asleep, now before I get back to work I thought that I'd pose a question: As we reprogram our lives to live without Nicotine -------------Hell I don't even know what I want to ask. I feel like I'm back in the 1st week fog. Does anyone else have this big funk around day 50??? Any ideas of how to shake it?? I don't even want to spend that much time here online, and that has been a huge part of my life and quit for the past 50 days!!
I have some great news for you WT, this is absolutely normal! You are well on your way to a pain free and funk free quit. I had some real bad funks through day 220+/- but haven't had any since (but know there will be more occational funks in the future). The "I don't give a shits" will pass.
-NDY 267 days of freedom
notdead you really know how to give a guy hope-----220 days! Thats only another 170 or so days 'impatient'
I know it will pass just needed to piss and moan!!
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Day 53 Blah Blah Blah!!!
I don't know rather the feelings I'm having are quit related or not. I've just been feeling rather down and don't give a shit attitude (not my quit it is still #1). I was taking a short break from work and I just fell asleep, now before I get back to work I thought that I'd pose a question: As we reprogram our lives to live without Nicotine -------------Hell I don't even know what I want to ask. I feel like I'm back in the 1st week fog. Does anyone else have this big funk around day 50??? Any ideas of how to shake it?? I don't even want to spend that much time here online, and that has been a huge part of my life and quit for the past 50 days!!
Day 71 and I feel it too. I actually just felt pretty good hitting the hump day. I was a late bloomer in life so I probably am a late bloomer in my quit. All I can say is you are not alone in this. I have felt this way since Friday.
My short term memory is bad, when I get home from work, there is tons of things to do but I just go get into bed and watch tv.
I only know that I have been through this before so it is just another temporary phase.
The tongue thing, I am at a loss. I have nothing like that and never did. Have you started taking or eating anything like fruit since your quit that is different. Maybe it is an allergic reaction. When I eat honeydew Mellon my mouth itches. Maybe you started something in your quit that your mouth has a reaction to?
Just a thought.
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Day 53 Blah Blah Blah!!!
I don't know rather the feelings I'm having are quit related or not. I've just been feeling rather down and don't give a shit attitude (not my quit it is still #1).  I was taking a short break from work and I just fell asleep, now before I get back to work I thought that I'd pose a question: As we reprogram our lives to live without Nicotine -------------Hell I don't even know what I want to ask. I feel like I'm back in the 1st week fog. Does anyone else have this big funk around day 50??? Any ideas of how to shake it?? I don't even want to spend that much time here online, and that has been a huge part of my life and quit for the past 50 days!!
I have some great news for you WT, this is absolutely normal! You are well on your way to a pain free and funk free quit. I had some real bad funks through day 220+/- but haven't had any since (but know there will be more occational funks in the future). The "I don't give a shits" will pass.
-NDY 267 days of freedom
notdead you really know how to give a guy hope-----220 days! Thats only another 170 or so days 'impatient'
I know it will pass just needed to piss and moan!!
Sorry man, no magic pills to make it go away. Who's the dumbass that put that shit in their body for over 38 years? - YOU (and me!) Seems like I got off easy with only 220 days. But it's never really over, just easier. How about you just think about today. Pissing and moaning actually helps a ton. Anything to distract the funk. Go see a movie (I recommend the Dictator, but don't see it with your wife)
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Day 53 Blah Blah Blah!!!
I don't know rather the feelings I'm having are quit related or not. I've just been feeling rather down and don't give a shit attitude (not my quit it is still #1).  I was taking a short break from work and I just fell asleep, now before I get back to work I thought that I'd pose a question: As we reprogram our lives to live without Nicotine -------------Hell I don't even know what I want to ask. I feel like I'm back in the 1st week fog. Does anyone else have this big funk around day 50??? Any ideas of how to shake it?? I don't even want to spend that much time here online, and that has been a huge part of my life and quit for the past 50 days!!
I have some great news for you WT, this is absolutely normal! You are well on your way to a pain free and funk free quit. I had some real bad funks through day 220+/- but haven't had any since (but know there will be more occational funks in the future). The "I don't give a shits" will pass.
-NDY 267 days of freedom
notdead you really know how to give a guy hope-----220 days! Thats only another 170 or so days 'impatient'
I know it will pass just needed to piss and moan!!
Sorry man, no magic pills to make it go away. Who's the dumbass that put that shit in their body for over 38 years? - YOU (and me!) Seems like I got off easy with only 220 days. But it's never really over, just easier. How about you just think about today. Pissing and moaning actually helps a ton. Anything to distract the funk. Go see a movie (I recommend the Dictator, but don't see it with your wife)
You are right about who put the shit in my body. I hate that prick! But I love the one that has said no more.
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Day 53 Blah Blah Blah!!!
I don't know rather the feelings I'm having are quit related or not. I've just been feeling rather down and don't give a shit attitude (not my quit it is still #1).  I was taking a short break from work and I just fell asleep, now before I get back to work I thought that I'd pose a question: As we reprogram our lives to live without Nicotine -------------Hell I don't even know what I want to ask. I feel like I'm back in the 1st week fog. Does anyone else have this big funk around day 50??? Any ideas of how to shake it?? I don't even want to spend that much time here online, and that has been a huge part of my life and quit for the past 50 days!!
I have some great news for you WT, this is absolutely normal! You are well on your way to a pain free and funk free quit. I had some real bad funks through day 220+/- but haven't had any since (but know there will be more occational funks in the future). The "I don't give a shits" will pass.
-NDY 267 days of freedom
notdead you really know how to give a guy hope-----220 days! Thats only another 170 or so days 'impatient'
I know it will pass just needed to piss and moan!!
Sorry man, no magic pills to make it go away. Who's the dumbass that put that shit in their body for over 38 years? - YOU (and me!) Seems like I got off easy with only 220 days. But it's never really over, just easier. How about you just think about today. Pissing and moaning actually helps a ton. Anything to distract the funk. Go see a movie (I recommend the Dictator, but don't see it with your wife)
You are right about who put the shit in my body. I hate that prick! But I love the one that has said no more.
I had a nasty 50 day funk, but wt, if it helps you to know, I haven't funked since. The "usual" funk times were when I started working out and jogging, and I truly credit that to the lack of funks. Just somethin to keep in mind
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Day 53 Blah Blah Blah!!!
I don't know rather the feelings I'm having are quit related or not. I've just been feeling rather down and don't give a shit attitude (not my quit it is still #1).  I was taking a short break from work and I just fell asleep, now before I get back to work I thought that I'd pose a question: As we reprogram our lives to live without Nicotine -------------Hell I don't even know what I want to ask. I feel like I'm back in the 1st week fog. Does anyone else have this big funk around day 50??? Any ideas of how to shake it?? I don't even want to spend that much time here online, and that has been a huge part of my life and quit for the past 50 days!!
I have some great news for you WT, this is absolutely normal! You are well on your way to a pain free and funk free quit. I had some real bad funks through day 220+/- but haven't had any since (but know there will be more occational funks in the future). The "I don't give a shits" will pass.
-NDY 267 days of freedom
notdead you really know how to give a guy hope-----220 days! Thats only another 170 or so days 'impatient'
I know it will pass just needed to piss and moan!!
Sorry man, no magic pills to make it go away. Who's the dumbass that put that shit in their body for over 38 years? - YOU (and me!) Seems like I got off easy with only 220 days. But it's never really over, just easier. How about you just think about today. Pissing and moaning actually helps a ton. Anything to distract the funk. Go see a movie (I recommend the Dictator, but don't see it with your wife)
You are right about who put the shit in my body. I hate that prick! But I love the one that has said no more.
I had a nasty 50 day funk, but wt, if it helps you to know, I haven't funked since. The "usual" funk times were when I started working out and jogging, and I truly credit that to the lack of funks. Just somethin to keep in mind
Not sure what you are trying to say.
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Hang in there WT - the funks suck but they do pass. I think around day 76 I had a major what the fuck, who cares kinda day - the worst day yet. But, I woke up on Friday and felt great. It had passed. I know I would have felt like shit, worse than I did on 76 if I would have caved. Keep pushing through and stay quit - once you come out of the fog you will feel so much better than you did heading into it. It will strengthen your quit.
Keep grinding it out - you are a Badass Quitter
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Hang in there WT - the funks suck but they do pass. I think around day 76 I had a major what the fuck, who cares kinda day - the worst day yet. But, I woke up on Friday and felt great. It had passed. I know I would have felt like shit, worse than I did on 76 if I would have caved. Keep pushing through and stay quit - once you come out of the fog you will feel so much better than you did heading into it. It will strengthen your quit.
Keep grinding it out - you are a Badass Quitter
I will second that!
Stay Focused
Stay Strong
Stay QUIT!!!
Funks are nic's last ditch effort to reclaim you....dont let that happen stay the course and grow from it!
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This past week has sucked! I've been really down deep in a funk! I've witnessed things on KTC that have bothered me. My quit has been strong until Friday when I had a bad dip dream, followed by entertaining the bitch in a plan to cave. I remain faithful to my word, still quit. For 58 days I have been drinking deep of the quit koolaid. But now I realize that what some see as acceptable doesn't necessarily meet my criteria (that is fine, we are all different) I wouldn't want us to all be the same. And my standards are mine, not yours and I would never push mine on you, or never consider myself better than another. For my quit to work for me I need to do something different than I have been doing. For me to honor my quit and my fellow quitters, I need to honor my beliefs and standards; that is my definition of integrity. And I have been continually telling new quitters the importance of integrity, and then turning around and being a hypocrite. Each day from this day forth I'm going to try harder to increase my integrity. My new Motto will be: Quit With Integrity Now, QWIN!
I have no intentions to put anyone except myself down in this post. I have been less than honest with myself, and I feel a need to be honest to make my quit have true integrity and lasting power. Please accept my apology if I have offended anyone over the past 58 days, I would never intentionally do that. I also wish to thank everyone for their support and strength that has gotten me this far. I hope everyone will feel welcome to reach to me for help and in return I need your help when I'm weak (most of the time). KTC has been and is truly the greatest blessing to come my way in a very long time. I QWIN
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This past week has sucked! I've been really down deep in a funk! I've witnessed things on KTC that have bothered me. My quit has been strong until Friday when I had a bad dip dream, followed by entertaining the bitch in a plan to cave. I remain faithful to my word, still quit. For 58 days I have been drinking deep of the quit koolaid. But now I realize that what some see as acceptable doesn't necessarily meet my criteria (that is fine, we are all different) I wouldn't want us to all be the same. And my standards are mine, not yours and I would never push mine on you, or never consider myself better than another. For my quit to work for me I need to do something different than I have been doing. For me to honor my quit and my fellow quitters, I need to honor my beliefs and standards; that is my definition of integrity. And I have been continually telling new quitters the importance of integrity, and then turning around and being a hypocrite. Each day from this day forth I'm going to try harder to increase my integrity. My new Motto will be: Quit With Integrity Now, QWIN!
I have no intentions to put anyone except myself down in this post. I have been less than honest with myself, and I feel a need to be honest to make my quit have true integrity and lasting power. Please accept my apology if I have offended anyone over the past 58 days, I would never intentionally do that. I also wish to thank everyone for their support and strength that has gotten me this far. I hope everyone will feel welcome to reach to me for help and in return I need your help when I'm weak (most of the time). KTC has been and is truly the greatest blessing to come my way in a very long time. I QWIN
Stay strong brother this ride is so similiar to a roller coaster its horrible!
The ups are great and the downs suck something awful, but I promise stay quit and regaining your freedom from the can is the one of the sweetest victories!!!
Stay focused and stay QUIT brother!
-
This past week has sucked! I've been really down deep in a funk! I've witnessed things on KTC that have bothered me. My quit has been strong until Friday when I had a bad dip dream, followed by entertaining the bitch in a plan to cave. I remain faithful to my word, still quit. For 58 days I have been drinking deep of the quit koolaid. But now I realize that what some see as acceptable doesn't necessarily meet my criteria (that is fine, we are all different) I wouldn't want us to all be the same. And my standards are mine, not yours and I would never push mine on you, or never consider myself better than another. For my quit to work for me I need to do something different than I have been doing. For me to honor my quit and my fellow quitters, I need to honor my beliefs and standards; that is my definition of integrity. And I have been continually telling new quitters the importance of integrity, and then turning around and being a hypocrite. Each day from this day forth I'm going to try harder to increase my integrity. My new Motto will be: Quit With Integrity Now, QWIN!
I have no intentions to put anyone except myself down in this post. I have been less than honest with myself, and I feel a need to be honest to make my quit have true integrity and lasting power. Please accept my apology if I have offended anyone over the past 58 days, I would never intentionally do that. I also wish to thank everyone for their support and strength that has gotten me this far. I hope everyone will feel welcome to reach to me for help and in return I need your help when I'm weak (most of the time). KTC has been and is truly the greatest blessing to come my way in a very long time. I QWIN
Stay strong brother this ride is so similiar to a roller coaster its horrible!
The ups are great and the downs suck something awful, but I promise stay quit and regaining your freedom from the can is the one of the sweetest victories!!!
Stay focused and stay QUIT brother!
WT-
You may be experiencing a combination of things - the maturing of a quit - a number of blowouts on the site - conflict issues on the site you may not be in favor of, the dreaded 60 day funk -
Quit is highly personal but it can be greatly effected when foundatational arguements come into play
Rule 1 - Always protect your quit
Rule 2 - Fulfill your promise daily
Rule 3 - Positively impact the quit of another -
Rule 4- repeat tomorrow
-
This past week has sucked! I've been really down deep in a funk! I've witnessed things on KTC that have bothered me. My quit has been strong until Friday when I had a bad dip dream, followed by entertaining the bitch in a plan to cave. I remain faithful to my word, still quit.  For 58 days I have been drinking deep of the quit koolaid. But now I realize that what some see as acceptable doesn't necessarily meet my criteria (that is fine, we are all different) I wouldn't want us to all be the same. And my standards are mine, not yours and I would never push mine on you, or never consider myself better than another.  For my quit to work for me I need to do something different than I have been doing. For me to honor my quit and my fellow quitters, I need to honor my beliefs and standards; that is my definition of integrity. And I have been continually telling new quitters the importance of integrity, and then turning around and being a hypocrite. Each day from this day forth I'm going to try harder to increase my integrity. My new Motto will be: Quit With Integrity Now, QWIN!
I have no intentions to put anyone except myself down in this post. I have been less than honest with myself, and I feel a need to be honest to make my quit have true integrity and lasting power. Please accept my apology if I have offended anyone over the past 58 days, I would never intentionally do that. I also wish to thank everyone for their support and strength that has gotten me this far. I hope everyone will feel welcome to reach to me for help and in return I need your help when I'm weak (most of the time). KTC has been and is truly the greatest blessing to come my way in a very long time. I QWIN
Stay strong brother this ride is so similiar to a roller coaster its horrible!
The ups are great and the downs suck something awful, but I promise stay quit and regaining your freedom from the can is the one of the sweetest victories!!!
Stay focused and stay QUIT brother!
WT-
You may be experiencing a combination of things - the maturing of a quit - a number of blowouts on the site - conflict issues on the site you may not be in favor of, the dreaded 60 day funk -
Quit is highly personal but it can be greatly effected when foundatational arguements come into play
Rule 1 - Always protect your quit
Rule 2 - Fulfill your promise daily
Rule 3 - Positively impact the quit of another -
Rule 4- repeat tomorrow
Hey brother - you are doing great and have been. I agree with Cbird - protect and defend your quit. Do not worry about others, do not worry about or get involved in the drama if it effects you in a negative way. Defend and protect your quit. Post roll everyday, and help others who WANT to be helped. You can try all you want on some, there are some who don't want the help.
Hang in there brother, like I typed up earlier - I had a shitty day 76 - was on the edge but made it through. I felt great the next day because I did not cave, I beat it - but not ALONE. There are a few close to me that pulled me through. Find those few and lean on them heavy in times of need. There are a lot of damn good quitters on here but you need to find that few guys who will be there no matter what and are constantly looking out for you. You either already know who they are or need to keep searching for them but narrow it down and lean on those guys and help those guys.
You can do this and enjoy it but, you still have some serious battles in front of you. We all do. I plan to beat them with the support of this site, and with the help from my quit brothers. Continue to post and share cause that helps us all. It is important for you to know that there are battles ahead so you can be prepared for them - but by posting your struggles you are also preparing guys with less days than you to prepare for a possible funk in the 50's. You are helping others and maybe didn't mean to.
Keep up the great work and I QWIN with you today.
-
I had an experience today that I feel that I need to comment on: Last week I learned of a seminar that I could go to that would further some education requirements that I needed for a license that I currently hold. This class was about 3 hrs from home, and would be with a group of people that I knew would consist of a large percent of dippers. At first I thought of and entertained the thought of a planned cave. I thought of it for several days, and then I had a dip dream about the day.
Today was the day of the class. As today became closer I fantasised about a dip.
I had thoughts, that know one would know, etc. Then last night I realized that I would be letting myself down and that I would also be letting all my quit friends down as well.
I had to leave early this morning and I posted my promise to each of you that I would return still quit, I held my wife's hand and told her of the thoughts that I had had and I promised her that I would return quit. I knew that most of the travel time would be completely out of cell coverage and I wasn't sure if when I got to the class if there would be cell coverage or wifi. There was both, but didn't need them for my quit, even though I did make some contacts and reported to some of my quit buddies.
The whole experience turned into one of the most strengthening events of my quit. I got to the town early and filled with gas and got a pop; the cans behind the counter repulsed me. Part of our class was outside in a parking lot doing some hands on work. I stood by a teenage little prick that packed a tiny little pinch in his lip, that he bumped from a friend. He could hardly keep from gagging, and he continually spit at our feet. If he missed a spit you could see his face turn green. I kept thinking did I smell like this little prick all the time, it was gross.
Everything about today strengthened my quit. Then when I headed home I sent my wife a text that we got out early. She texted back "buckle your seat belt and stay quit". One of the best things about my quit is the relationship with my lovely wife who has put up with my bullshit dipping for 32 yrs.
Thanks to all of those that were with me today in my quit.
I DID RETURN WITH HONOR TODAY!!!
-
I had an experience today that I feel that I need to comment on: Last week I learned of a seminar that I could go to that would further some education requirements that I needed for a license that I currently hold. This class was about 3 hrs from home, and would be with a group of people that I knew would consist of a large percent of dippers. At first I thought of and entertained the thought of a planned cave. I thought of it for several days, and then I had a dip dream about the day.
Today was the day of the class. As today became closer I fantasised about a dip.
I had thoughts, that know one would know, etc. Then last night I realized that I would be letting myself down and that I would also be letting all my quit friends down as well.
I had to leave early this morning and I posted my promise to each of you that I would return still quit, I held my wife's hand and told her of the thoughts that I had had and I promised her that I would return quit. I knew that most of the travel time would be completely out of cell coverage and I wasn't sure if when I got to the class if there would be cell coverage or wifi. There was both, but didn't need them for my quit, even though I did make some contacts and reported to some of my quit buddies.
The whole experience turned into one of the most strengthening events of my quit. I got to the town early and filled with gas and got a pop; the cans behind the counter repulsed me. Part of our class was outside in a parking lot doing some hands on work. I stood by a teenage little prick that packed a tiny little pinch in his lip, that he bumped from a friend. He could hardly keep from gagging, and he continually spit at our feet. If he missed a spit you could see his face turn green. I kept thinking did I smell like this little prick all the time, it was gross.
Everything about today strengthened my quit. Then when I headed home I sent my wife a text that we got out early. She texted back "buckle your seat belt and stay quit". One of the best things about my quit is the relationship with my lovely wife who has put up with my bullshit dipping for 32 yrs.
Thanks to all of those that were with me today in my quit.
I DID RETURN WITH HONOR TODAY!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Well done my friend! Way to win a battle....for all of us!
Thanks for sharing your victory.
-
I had an experience today that I feel that I need to comment on: Last week I learned of a seminar that I could go to that would further some education requirements that I needed for a license that I currently hold. This class was about 3 hrs from home, and would be with a group of people that I knew would consist of a large percent of dippers. At first I thought of and entertained the thought of a planned cave. I thought of it for several days, and then I had a dip dream about the day.Â
Today was the day of the class. As today became closer I fantasised about a dip.
I had thoughts, that know one would know, etc. Then last night I realized that I would be letting myself down and that I would also be letting all my quit friends down as well.Â
I had to leave early this morning and I posted my promise to each of you that I would return still quit, I held my wife's hand and told her of the thoughts that I had had and I promised her that I would return quit. I knew that most of the travel time would be completely out of cell coverage and I wasn't sure if when I got to the class if there would be cell coverage or wifi. There was both, but didn't need them for my quit, even though I did make some contacts and reported to some of my quit buddies.
The whole experience turned into one of the most strengthening events of my quit. I got to the town early and filled with gas and got a pop; the cans behind the counter repulsed me. Part of our class was outside in a parking lot doing some hands on work. I stood by a teenage little prick that packed a tiny little pinch in his lip, that he bumped from a friend. He could hardly keep from gagging, and he continually spit at our feet. If he missed a spit you could see his face turn green. I kept thinking did I smell like this little prick all the time, it was gross.Â
Everything about today strengthened my quit. Then when I headed home I sent my wife a text that we got out early. She texted back "buckle your seat belt and stay quit". One of the best things about my quit is the relationship with my lovely wife who has put up with my bullshit dipping for 32 yrs.
Thanks to all of those that were with me today in my quit.
I DID RETURN WITH HONOR TODAY!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Well done my friend! Way to win a battle....for all of us!
Thanks for sharing your victory.
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
'worship'
Great victories are best shared!
I am proud to be quit with you today!
-
She texted back "buckle your seat belt and stay quit".
That's awesome WT. Beyond the great quit story that surrounded your wife's comment, this sentence stuck out the most. Having a partner there with you who can text you the same support that we can who you then get to see and feel when you get home makes your quit that much better. By the way, I had no doubts about you coming back quit.
Good to know what you meant by learning something about yourself from your text last night.
-
I had an experience today that I feel that I need to comment on: Last week I learned of a seminar that I could go to that would further some education requirements that I needed for a license that I currently hold. This class was about 3 hrs from home, and would be with a group of people that I knew would consist of a large percent of dippers. At first I thought of and entertained the thought of a planned cave. I thought of it for several days, and then I had a dip dream about the day.
Today was the day of the class. As today became closer I fantasised about a dip.
I had thoughts, that know one would know, etc. Then last night I realized that I would be letting myself down and that I would also be letting all my quit friends down as well.
I had to leave early this morning and I posted my promise to each of you that I would return still quit, I held my wife's hand and told her of the thoughts that I had had and I promised her that I would return quit. I knew that most of the travel time would be completely out of cell coverage and I wasn't sure if when I got to the class if there would be cell coverage or wifi. There was both, but didn't need them for my quit, even though I did make some contacts and reported to some of my quit buddies.
The whole experience turned into one of the most strengthening events of my quit. I got to the town early and filled with gas and got a pop; the cans behind the counter repulsed me. Part of our class was outside in a parking lot doing some hands on work. I stood by a teenage little prick that packed a tiny little pinch in his lip, that he bumped from a friend. He could hardly keep from gagging, and he continually spit at our feet. If he missed a spit you could see his face turn green. I kept thinking did I smell like this little prick all the time, it was gross.
Everything about today strengthened my quit. Then when I headed home I sent my wife a text that we got out early. She texted back "buckle your seat belt and stay quit". One of the best things about my quit is the relationship with my lovely wife who has put up with my bullshit dipping for 32 yrs.
Thanks to all of those that were with me today in my quit.
I DID RETURN WITH HONOR TODAY!!!
Great job WT - thanks for sharing. Very proud of you and great to hear that your wife is so supportive. You are a true inspiration to us all.
Keep beating down the bitch - one day at a time.
Great Victory
-
I had an experience today that I feel that I need to comment on: Last week I learned of a seminar that I could go to that would further some education requirements that I needed for a license that I currently hold. This class was about 3 hrs from home, and would be with a group of people that I knew would consist of a large percent of dippers. At first I thought of and entertained the thought of a planned cave. I thought of it for several days, and then I had a dip dream about the day.
Today was the day of the class. As today became closer I fantasised about a dip.
I had thoughts, that know one would know, etc. Then last night I realized that I would be letting myself down and that I would also be letting all my quit friends down as well.
I had to leave early this morning and I posted my promise to each of you that I would return still quit, I held my wife's hand and told her of the thoughts that I had had and I promised her that I would return quit. I knew that most of the travel time would be completely out of cell coverage and I wasn't sure if when I got to the class if there would be cell coverage or wifi. There was both, but didn't need them for my quit, even though I did make some contacts and reported to some of my quit buddies.
The whole experience turned into one of the most strengthening events of my quit. I got to the town early and filled with gas and got a pop; the cans behind the counter repulsed me. Part of our class was outside in a parking lot doing some hands on work. I stood by a teenage little prick that packed a tiny little pinch in his lip, that he bumped from a friend. He could hardly keep from gagging, and he continually spit at our feet. If he missed a spit you could see his face turn green. I kept thinking did I smell like this little prick all the time, it was gross.
Everything about today strengthened my quit. Then when I headed home I sent my wife a text that we got out early. She texted back "buckle your seat belt and stay quit". One of the best things about my quit is the relationship with my lovely wife who has put up with my bullshit dipping for 32 yrs.
Thanks to all of those that were with me today in my quit.
I DID RETURN WITH HONOR TODAY!!!
Good stuff WT... I am right there with you . I wonder sometimes if I smelt like that , hell if I looked like that. I see dudes with their lip poking off their face and I am happy as hell that that is no longer me.. Stay Quit Brother.
-
'Crazy'
Fellow quitters: I hesitate to post this, I don't want to be hit by a flood of text, calls or really anything else I feel your support daily. The issue I'm dealing with is very odd. I really don't think the attitude that hit me yesterday is dip or quit related! On the other hand maybe it is. If anyone has similar thing happen share it here to help everyone.
I went from the highest point in my quit on Wednesday to the very lowest point in my quit In just a few hours, my attitude started out as I don't give a shit and rapidly progressed into a much deeper depression with thought that I haven't had in months (depression has been a part of my life for decades however it's been under control throughout my quit). I've always associated depression with chew. I never knew if I chewed to self medicate or if I was depressed because I knew I was a helpless slave. My quit is not in jepordy, not even close! I just need to stand back and try to figure out what happened. I may back away for awhile and limit my contact to posting roll till I figure this out!
My quit is not in danger!!. 'Crazy'
-
'Crazy'
Fellow quitters: I hesitate to post this, I don't want to be hit by a flood of text, calls or really anything else I feel your support daily. The issue I'm dealing with is very odd. I really don't think the attitude that hit me yesterday is dip or quit related! On the other hand maybe it is. If anyone has similar thing happen share it here to help everyone.
I went from the highest point in my quit on Wednesday to the very lowest point in my quit In just a few hours, my attitude started out as I don't give a shit and rapidly progressed into a much deeper depression with thought that I haven't had in months (depression has been a part of my life for decades however it's been under control throughout my quit). I've always associated depression with chew. I never knew if I chewed to self medicate or if I was depressed because I knew I was a helpless slave. My quit is not in jepordy, not even close! I just need to stand back and try to figure out what happened. I may back away for awhile and limit my contact to posting roll till I figure this out!
My quit is not in danger!!. 'Crazy'
I think it's a pretty normal thing. It's happened to me a couple of times, the biggest swing I think was around day 105 or something.
When I posted roll I felt invincible, ready to shout it from the rooftops "I'm on top of the world!!!" By noon I was craving like a crack addict.
It can be really depressing, but don't let it get you down. Like the rest of your quit you'll just put your head down and barrel through it.
You go this. You don't dip, so there's no way you can cave right?!? Simple as that!!
-
'Crazy'
Fellow quitters: I hesitate to post this, I don't want to be hit by a flood of text, calls or really anything else I feel your support daily. The issue I'm dealing with is very odd. I really don't think the attitude that hit me yesterday is dip or quit related! On the other hand maybe it is. If anyone has similar thing happen share it here to help everyone.Â
I went from the highest point in my quit on Wednesday to the very lowest point in my quit In just a few hours, my attitude started out as I don't give a shit and rapidly progressed into a much deeper depression with thought that I haven't had in months (depression has been a part of my life for decades however it's been under control throughout my quit). I've always associated depression with chew. I never knew if I chewed to self medicate or if I was depressed because I knew I was a helpless slave. My quit is not in jepordy, not even close! I just need to stand back and try to figure out what happened. I may back away for awhile and limit my contact to posting roll till I figure this out!
My quit is not in danger!!.  'Crazy'
I think it's a pretty normal thing. It's happened to me a couple of times, the biggest swing I think was around day 105 or something.
When I posted roll I felt invincible, ready to shout it from the rooftops "I'm on top of the world!!!" By noon I was craving like a crack addict.
It can be really depressing, but don't let it get you down. Like the rest of your quit you'll just put your head down and barrel through it.
You go this. You don't dip, so there's no way you can cave right?!? Simple as that!!
Read this from the beginning: Emotional roller coaster (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5340&hl=)
Sorry WT, you are not a special butterfly, just a normal addict brain getting rewired. It will get better, much better!
-
'Crazy'
Fellow quitters: I hesitate to post this, I don't want to be hit by a flood of text, calls or really anything else I feel your support daily. The issue I'm dealing with is very odd. I really don't think the attitude that hit me yesterday is dip or quit related! On the other hand maybe it is. If anyone has similar thing happen share it here to help everyone.Â
I went from the highest point in my quit on Wednesday to the very lowest point in my quit In just a few hours, my attitude started out as I don't give a shit and rapidly progressed into a much deeper depression with thought that I haven't had in months (depression has been a part of my life for decades however it's been under control throughout my quit). I've always associated depression with chew. I never knew if I chewed to self medicate or if I was depressed because I knew I was a helpless slave. My quit is not in jepordy, not even close! I just need to stand back and try to figure out what happened. I may back away for awhile and limit my contact to posting roll till I figure this out!
My quit is not in danger!!.  'Crazy'
I think it's a pretty normal thing. It's happened to me a couple of times, the biggest swing I think was around day 105 or something.
When I posted roll I felt invincible, ready to shout it from the rooftops "I'm on top of the world!!!" By noon I was craving like a crack addict.
It can be really depressing, but don't let it get you down. Like the rest of your quit you'll just put your head down and barrel through it.
You go this. You don't dip, so there's no way you can cave right?!? Simple as that!!
This is sadly part of the process....
Don't stop posting but maybe just do some HOF speech reading but stay away from some of the drama!
I can see the usefulness to stay at arms length for a little bit but dont shut this place out completely we all need the accountability even if we dont like the accountability!
PM me if you need any help brother
-
'Crazy'
Fellow quitters: I hesitate to post this, I don't want to be hit by a flood of text, calls or really anything else I feel your support daily. The issue I'm dealing with is very odd. I really don't think the attitude that hit me yesterday is dip or quit related! On the other hand maybe it is. If anyone has similar thing happen share it here to help everyone.Â
I went from the highest point in my quit on Wednesday to the very lowest point in my quit In just a few hours, my attitude started out as I don't give a shit and rapidly progressed into a much deeper depression with thought that I haven't had in months (depression has been a part of my life for decades however it's been under control throughout my quit). I've always associated depression with chew. I never knew if I chewed to self medicate or if I was depressed because I knew I was a helpless slave. My quit is not in jepordy, not even close! I just need to stand back and try to figure out what happened. I may back away for awhile and limit my contact to posting roll till I figure this out!
My quit is not in danger!!.   'Crazy'
I think it's a pretty normal thing. It's happened to me a couple of times, the biggest swing I think was around day 105 or something.
When I posted roll I felt invincible, ready to shout it from the rooftops "I'm on top of the world!!!" By noon I was craving like a crack addict.
It can be really depressing, but don't let it get you down. Like the rest of your quit you'll just put your head down and barrel through it.
You go this. You don't dip, so there's no way you can cave right?!? Simple as that!!
This is sadly part of the process....
Don't stop posting but maybe just do some HOF speech reading but stay away from some of the drama!
I can see the usefulness to stay at arms length for a little bit but dont shut this place out completely we all need the accountability even if we dont like the accountability!
PM me if you need any help brother
I agree with Grizzly. I also understand the feelings. My quit has been very bi-polar, I have had some of the highest highs and then suddenly hit with the lowest of lows. It amazed me how fast it could change.
You just have a quick storm burst in your mind. Take cover, ride out the storm and I promise you will see rays of sunshine and the clouds will go away.
Just post roll for now and keep your word. It will get better. I also wouldn't over analyze what you are feeling. Just ride it out. It will change.
-
'Crazy'
Fellow quitters: I hesitate to post this, I don't want to be hit by a flood of text, calls or really anything else I feel your support daily. The issue I'm dealing with is very odd. I really don't think the attitude that hit me yesterday is dip or quit related! On the other hand maybe it is. If anyone has similar thing happen share it here to help everyone.Â
I went from the highest point in my quit on Wednesday to the very lowest point in my quit In just a few hours, my attitude started out as I don't give a shit and rapidly progressed into a much deeper depression with thought that I haven't had in months (depression has been a part of my life for decades however it's been under control throughout my quit). I've always associated depression with chew. I never knew if I chewed to self medicate or if I was depressed because I knew I was a helpless slave. My quit is not in jepordy, not even close! I just need to stand back and try to figure out what happened. I may back away for awhile and limit my contact to posting roll till I figure this out!
My quit is not in danger!!.   'Crazy'
I think it's a pretty normal thing. It's happened to me a couple of times, the biggest swing I think was around day 105 or something.
When I posted roll I felt invincible, ready to shout it from the rooftops "I'm on top of the world!!!" By noon I was craving like a crack addict.
It can be really depressing, but don't let it get you down. Like the rest of your quit you'll just put your head down and barrel through it.
You go this. You don't dip, so there's no way you can cave right?!? Simple as that!!
This is sadly part of the process....
Don't stop posting but maybe just do some HOF speech reading but stay away from some of the drama!
I can see the usefulness to stay at arms length for a little bit but dont shut this place out completely we all need the accountability even if we dont like the accountability!
PM me if you need any help brother
I agree with Grizzly. I also understand the feelings. My quit has been very bi-polar, I have had some of the highest highs and then suddenly hit with the lowest of lows. It amazed me how fast it could change.
You just have a quick storm burst in your mind. Take cover, ride out the storm and I promise you will see rays of sunshine and the clouds will go away.
Just post roll for now and keep your word. It will get better. I also wouldn't over analyze what you are feeling. Just ride it out. It will change.
I have been feeling the exact same way. Fine one minute, funk the next. Lately, I've just been posting roll, updating the july sheet and not reading the site until I do it again the next morning.
Sometimes you gotta take a break I guess, just not from posting roll.
-
'Crazy'
Fellow quitters: I hesitate to post this, I don't want to be hit by a flood of text, calls or really anything else I feel your support daily. The issue I'm dealing with is very odd. I really don't think the attitude that hit me yesterday is dip or quit related! On the other hand maybe it is. If anyone has similar thing happen share it here to help everyone.Â
I went from the highest point in my quit on Wednesday to the very lowest point in my quit In just a few hours, my attitude started out as I don't give a shit and rapidly progressed into a much deeper depression with thought that I haven't had in months (depression has been a part of my life for decades however it's been under control throughout my quit). I've always associated depression with chew. I never knew if I chewed to self medicate or if I was depressed because I knew I was a helpless slave. My quit is not in jepordy, not even close! I just need to stand back and try to figure out what happened. I may back away for awhile and limit my contact to posting roll till I figure this out!
My quit is not in danger!!.   'Crazy'
I think it's a pretty normal thing. It's happened to me a couple of times, the biggest swing I think was around day 105 or something.
When I posted roll I felt invincible, ready to shout it from the rooftops "I'm on top of the world!!!" By noon I was craving like a crack addict.
It can be really depressing, but don't let it get you down. Like the rest of your quit you'll just put your head down and barrel through it.
You go this. You don't dip, so there's no way you can cave right?!? Simple as that!!
This is sadly part of the process....
Don't stop posting but maybe just do some HOF speech reading but stay away from some of the drama!
I can see the usefulness to stay at arms length for a little bit but dont shut this place out completely we all need the accountability even if we dont like the accountability!
PM me if you need any help brother
I agree with Grizzly. I also understand the feelings. My quit has been very bi-polar, I have had some of the highest highs and then suddenly hit with the lowest of lows. It amazed me how fast it could change.
You just have a quick storm burst in your mind. Take cover, ride out the storm and I promise you will see rays of sunshine and the clouds will go away.
Just post roll for now and keep your word. It will get better. I also wouldn't over analyze what you are feeling. Just ride it out. It will change.
I have been feeling the exact same way. Fine one minute, funk the next. Lately, I've just been posting roll, updating the july sheet and not reading the site until I do it again the next morning.
Sometimes you gotta take a break I guess, just not from posting roll.
I went through this too around day 70. Worst funk by far I didn't want to dip, didn't crave just tired of fighting. I needed up talking this all natural stuff HTP-5 for a while. Your brain is reqiring and adjusting it takes time. The biggest shock to me through out my quit was the mental journey I've been on. I came through my funk like most funks in 4-5 days. Hang tough you are doing great and going through the normal course of things.
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'Crazy'
Fellow quitters: I hesitate to post this, I don't want to be hit by a flood of text, calls or really anything else I feel your support daily. The issue I'm dealing with is very odd. I really don't think the attitude that hit me yesterday is dip or quit related! On the other hand maybe it is. If anyone has similar thing happen share it here to help everyone.Â
I went from the highest point in my quit on Wednesday to the very lowest point in my quit In just a few hours, my attitude started out as I don't give a shit and rapidly progressed into a much deeper depression with thought that I haven't had in months (depression has been a part of my life for decades however it's been under control throughout my quit). I've always associated depression with chew. I never knew if I chewed to self medicate or if I was depressed because I knew I was a helpless slave. My quit is not in jepordy, not even close! I just need to stand back and try to figure out what happened. I may back away for awhile and limit my contact to posting roll till I figure this out!
My quit is not in danger!!.   'Crazy'
I think it's a pretty normal thing. It's happened to me a couple of times, the biggest swing I think was around day 105 or something.
When I posted roll I felt invincible, ready to shout it from the rooftops "I'm on top of the world!!!" By noon I was craving like a crack addict.
It can be really depressing, but don't let it get you down. Like the rest of your quit you'll just put your head down and barrel through it.
You go this. You don't dip, so there's no way you can cave right?!? Simple as that!!
This is sadly part of the process....
Don't stop posting but maybe just do some HOF speech reading but stay away from some of the drama!
I can see the usefulness to stay at arms length for a little bit but dont shut this place out completely we all need the accountability even if we dont like the accountability!
PM me if you need any help brother
I agree with Grizzly. I also understand the feelings. My quit has been very bi-polar, I have had some of the highest highs and then suddenly hit with the lowest of lows. It amazed me how fast it could change.
You just have a quick storm burst in your mind. Take cover, ride out the storm and I promise you will see rays of sunshine and the clouds will go away.
Just post roll for now and keep your word. It will get better. I also wouldn't over analyze what you are feeling. Just ride it out. It will change.
I have been feeling the exact same way. Fine one minute, funk the next. Lately, I've just been posting roll, updating the july sheet and not reading the site until I do it again the next morning.
Sometimes you gotta take a break I guess, just not from posting roll.
I went through this too around day 70. Worst funk by far I didn't want to dip, didn't crave just tired of fighting. I needed up talking this all natural stuff HTP-5 for a while. Your brain is reqiring and adjusting it takes time. The biggest shock to me through out my quit was the mental journey I've been on. I came through my funk like most funks in 4-5 days. Hang tough you are doing great and going through the normal course of things.
Day 80 was the ultimate low point in my quit. I wanted to curl up in a ball and cry in the corner of my office. I ended up talking one of my fellow April 12 brothers off the ledge that day. We share the same quit day and apparently our "that time of the month" cycles are coordinated as well.
Stay strong brother! Let me know if you need anything or a hug. I even do jock coddling on Fridays.
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'Crazy'
Fellow quitters: I hesitate to post this, I don't want to be hit by a flood of text, calls or really anything else I feel your support daily. The issue I'm dealing with is very odd. I really don't think the attitude that hit me yesterday is dip or quit related! On the other hand maybe it is. If anyone has similar thing happen share it here to help everyone.Â
I went from the highest point in my quit on Wednesday to the very lowest point in my quit In just a few hours, my attitude started out as I don't give a shit and rapidly progressed into a much deeper depression with thought that I haven't had in months (depression has been a part of my life for decades however it's been under control throughout my quit). I've always associated depression with chew. I never knew if I chewed to self medicate or if I was depressed because I knew I was a helpless slave. My quit is not in jepordy, not even close! I just need to stand back and try to figure out what happened. I may back away for awhile and limit my contact to posting roll till I figure this out!
My quit is not in danger!!.   'Crazy'
I think it's a pretty normal thing. It's happened to me a couple of times, the biggest swing I think was around day 105 or something.
When I posted roll I felt invincible, ready to shout it from the rooftops "I'm on top of the world!!!" By noon I was craving like a crack addict.
It can be really depressing, but don't let it get you down. Like the rest of your quit you'll just put your head down and barrel through it.
You go this. You don't dip, so there's no way you can cave right?!? Simple as that!!
This is sadly part of the process....
Don't stop posting but maybe just do some HOF speech reading but stay away from some of the drama!
I can see the usefulness to stay at arms length for a little bit but dont shut this place out completely we all need the accountability even if we dont like the accountability!
PM me if you need any help brother
I agree with Grizzly. I also understand the feelings. My quit has been very bi-polar, I have had some of the highest highs and then suddenly hit with the lowest of lows. It amazed me how fast it could change.
You just have a quick storm burst in your mind. Take cover, ride out the storm and I promise you will see rays of sunshine and the clouds will go away.
Just post roll for now and keep your word. It will get better. I also wouldn't over analyze what you are feeling. Just ride it out. It will change.
I have been feeling the exact same way. Fine one minute, funk the next. Lately, I've just been posting roll, updating the july sheet and not reading the site until I do it again the next morning.
Sometimes you gotta take a break I guess, just not from posting roll.
I went through this too around day 70. Worst funk by far I didn't want to dip, didn't crave just tired of fighting. I needed up talking this all natural stuff HTP-5 for a while. Your brain is reqiring and adjusting it takes time. The biggest shock to me through out my quit was the mental journey I've been on. I came through my funk like most funks in 4-5 days. Hang tough you are doing great and going through the normal course of things.
Day 80 was the ultimate low point in my quit. I wanted to curl up in a ball and cry in the corner of my office. I ended up talking one of my fellow April 12 brothers off the ledge that day. We share the same quit day and apparently our "that time of the month" cycles are coordinated as well.
Stay strong brother! Let me know if you need anything or a hug. I even do jock coddling on Fridays.
Thanks guys, I know you are all right! Damn that prick that used that shit for nearly 40 yrs. Tried to stay away but keep getting compelled to comment to newbies, it's therapeutic. I've been having some good moments (giving me some hope). Now after 4 days of mostly "don't give a shit" I got hit by some Intense craving. This was the first real crave since the first week. Oh I had short lived craves but not like this! I decided to come here and just release the tension that has been building. Like before my quit is golden, I'm strong, the shit actually makes my determination stronger! I thought that the suck was getting better, guess not, I'm going to continue to embrace more suck I guess. Bring it on bitch the suck tempers my quit!
The strength that I draw from my wife and you degenerate addicts is amazing. I thank God every day for each of you and KTC.
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Day 69 Im back and my funk has passed! finally!
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend, some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it canÂ’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME. One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 69 days)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
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Day 69 Im back and my funk has passed! finally!
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.Â
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend, some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (I’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (I’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (I’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME. One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 69 days)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
You are quit! Great thoughts and once truth is spoken, nothing more to add. It just sinks in. Thanks for enlightening me this morning.
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Day 69 Im back and my funk has passed! finally!
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.Â
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend, some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (I’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (I’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (I’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME. One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 69 days)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
This is some really good stuff - hey Mods, could you please add this to Words of Wisdom!
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Day 69 Im back and my funk has passed! finally!
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.Â
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend,  some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (I’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (I’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (I’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME.  One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 69 days)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
This is some really good stuff - hey Mods, could you please add this to Words of Wisdom!
I will second that motion!!!!
Great stuff WT truly great read!
When shit gets broken down like that it is always clear thoughts like those that can make or keep someone on the quit path!
-
Day 69 Im back and my funk has passed! finally!
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.Â
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend,  some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (I’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (I’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (I’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME.  One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 69 days)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
This is some really good stuff - hey Mods, could you please add this to Words of Wisdom!
I will second that motion!!!!
Great stuff WT truly great read!
When shit gets broken down like that it is always clear thoughts like those that can make or keep someone on the quit path!
Great work WT - very true. One day at a time!!! I quit with you on this fine Sunday. Will need some extra strength today but will be fine because I quit today!!!
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THE HIDDEN TRIGGER THAT I FOUND!
I started having Craves again and just couldn't get it, So soon after my last funk. I decided to search myself and see if there was a trigger that I was missing. There just didn't seem to be any real trigger in my work or family that was causing me to crave and get so depressed, My quit is solid, I love the new found freedom, I've got a lot of new friends here on KTC that have pulled me through some really miserable shit. Basically Life is good IÂ’m happy, So why the strong craves, I understand the day to day short-lived craves and the trigger driven craves. But what is making me crave?
My entire adult life I have used tobacco! When I wanted to stay awake for long periods of time I dipped, when I wanted the special moment alone I dipped, ah hell I dipped all the time even if I didn't have a reason or didn't recognize the reason. So in searching for a reason or trigger for my craving I realized one of my major times to dip was when there was conflict in my life, it was my escape. It was my refuge from life and the drama around me.
So why am I craving now when life is good, IÂ’m so happy with myself and my new whole new life?? I think I found the answer right here on KTC. It is my way of handling conflict; I always just avoided it by dipping and now that the dip isn't an option what do I do? I havenÂ’t figured that out yet so I revert back to the only thing I know and that is to withdraw with a dip: Thus the trigger and the crave. Each of these intense craves that I have experienced for no apparent reason have come to me as drama unfolds online (rather it is brought on by caves or other personality differences). I've tried to insert myself into the drama, tried to help smooth issues over. I have gotten involved in giving people shit. Still I hate conflict, I want to hide from it, I want to avoid it! The solution for me, it shouldn't be a problem anymore now that I know what the trigger is and recognize it. I need to learn how to deal with conflict without dip. Just part of the rewiring and training myself to live dip free. IÂ’m not saying that the conflict and giving people hell for caving is bad. Just the opposite I detest a cave. Caving makes me sick; it shows weakness and is one of the worse forms of conflict for me. I need to separate the CAVE from the CAVER!
We've seen some really weak excuses for caving lately and the cavers need to man up and decide rather they are serious about quitting! I will continue to be there to help them if they want help, but I will also be there to give them shit for being weak pussies. I will not withdraw and allow the nic bitch to try regaining any control of my thoughts. JUST MORE SUCK TO EMBRACE!!
I guess my point is that over the many years of addiction and living life with nicotine recognizing everyday activities that we have relied on nicotine as a crutch for are sometimes difficult see. I believe that every crave is triggered by something rather it is physical or psychological.
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THE HIDDEN TRIGGER THAT I FOUND!
I started having Craves again and just couldn't get it, So soon after my last funk. I decided to search myself and see if there was a trigger that I was missing. There just didn't seem to be any real trigger in my work or family that was causing me to crave and get so depressed, My quit is solid, I love the new found freedom, I've got a lot of new friends here on KTC that have pulled me through some really miserable shit. Basically Life is good IÂ’m happy, So why the strong craves, I understand the day to day short-lived craves and the trigger driven craves. But what is making me crave?
My entire adult life I have used tobacco! When I wanted to stay awake for long periods of time I dipped, when I wanted the special moment alone I dipped, ah hell I dipped all the time even if I didn't have a reason or didn't recognize the reason. So in searching for a reason or trigger for my craving I realized one of my major times to dip was when there was conflict in my life, it was my escape. It was my refuge from life and the drama around me.
So why am I craving now when life is good, IÂ’m so happy with myself and my new whole new life?? I think I found the answer right here on KTC. It is my way of handling conflict; I always just avoided it by dipping and now that the dip isn't an option what do I do? I havenÂ’t figured that out yet so I revert back to the only thing I know and that is to withdraw with a dip: Thus the trigger and the crave. Each of these intense craves that I have experienced for no apparent reason have come to me as drama unfolds online (rather it is brought on by caves or other personality differences). I've tried to insert myself into the drama, tried to help smooth issues over. I have gotten involved in giving people shit. Still I hate conflict, I want to hide from it, I want to avoid it! The solution for me, it shouldn't be a problem anymore now that I know what the trigger is and recognize it. I need to learn how to deal with conflict without dip. Just part of the rewiring and training myself to live dip free. IÂ’m not saying that the conflict and giving people hell for caving is bad. Just the opposite I detest a cave. Caving makes me sick; it shows weakness and is one of the worse forms of conflict for me. I need to separate the CAVE from the CAVER!
We've seen some really weak excuses for caving lately and the cavers need to man up and decide rather they are serious about quitting! I will continue to be there to help them if they want help, but I will also be there to give them shit for being weak pussies. I will not withdraw and allow the nic bitch to try regaining any control of my thoughts. JUST MORE SUCK TO EMBRACE!!
I guess my point is that over the many years of addiction and living life with nicotine recognizing everyday activities that we have relied on nicotine as a crutch for are sometimes difficult see. I believe that every crave is triggered by something rather it is physical or psychological.
Very well put!
I have noticed that all those times where the little nic bitch would accompany me I have not really missed but there was definetly a void! I started to use Smokey Mountain and it has helped a ton!
I do notice instead of taking a shot of smokey I just take a few deep breathes and work my way thru and I am starting to see that not only do I [/B]NOT need nicotene but I am much more leveled than before.
I will continue to watch for the "Hidden Triggers" thanks for the good post!
Stay Strong, Focused QUIT!!!!!
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LIFE GOES ON
77 days have come and gone. I donÂ’t know where that time has gone but IÂ’m grateful for the help from all my new found friends here. As time passes I often step back and reflect on what has happened, and how my quit differs from the past times that I have tried to stop. The big obvious for me is that this is the 1st time in 38 yrs. That I did it for me. No one pushed, encouraged, threatened or in any way tried to persuade me into quitting. I canÂ’t count the times that I threw cans out the window vowing to quit, and they were also without outside encouragement, rather they were out of guilt, embarrassment, self-loathing and self-appeasement. (thatÂ’s right I wanted to say that I had tried and that it was too hard) My decision to quit was in the plan for months and it was something that I really wanted. I also knew that it was a partial cause for my severe depression, and to end one I had to end the other and visa versa. Progress on both are coming along very well and I credit that to KTC and my new found friends. Many times the bitch has tried to persuade me to give up that it is still too hard that IÂ’m a failure and that IÂ’ll never make it. Well guess what she is wrong, dead wrong, IÂ’m strong and love my freedom and hate the shit worse now than I ever have before. Other than you my fellow quitters and my wife the only other person that knows what IÂ’ve been going through is my religious leader whom IÂ’ve shared my struggle with. Actually this same group is the only ones that know IÂ’ve had this terrible addiction for all of these years. The self-loathing has started to pass and IÂ’m really beginning so appreciate myself as a person. My quit is and always will be 1 day at a time but those days are beginning to get shorter and easier.
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Actually this same group is the only ones that know IÂ’ve had this terrible addiction for all of these years. The self-loathing has started to pass........
I am hearing what you are preaching WT57. And it is good! Self loathing sucks and it will slowly kill your soul.
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This quit is different for me too? I've quit 100s of times as well but this quit is completely different? I am certain it is you guys KTC that has made the difference. I am committed this time.. Before I guess I've had a wish to quit or been involved with an effort to quit.. but now it's serious. i really feel like after this I can accomplish anything I want! Thx for the text yesterday. Craves kicked my ass all day yesterday.. Worse on day 6 than 1-5? That don't make sense. What I have read after 3 days the nic is out of my system. I know its a bitch? Been sober for 9 years sometimes I still have drunk dreams? Out addictions want us back for life and will never be so far away that I should think I am cured all the way? One dip.One chew. One tiny hit of nic.. Im fucked..
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Am I an ADDICT OR DO I HAVE A HABIT??
I have seen this bantered about here on KTC since I first joined and people often mistakenly say that they have the bad habit of nicotine use. The putting nicotine into the body is definitely an addiction! I have been addicted to nicotine for years and my use is perfectly described in the following definition of Addiction. If you read further the definition of a Habit, my use of smokeless tobacco I contend was a habit. The main reason that I use to prove that it was a habit is that the use of fake dip wouldn't do any good for the addiction but it would satisfy the habit. I used fake dip for the first 50- 60 days of my quit on a regular basis, and then it just started becoming more of an annoyance. Now I keep it around for when my addiction causes me to crave the nicotine. The fake dip tricks my body into thinking that I'm feeding it the same thing It desires and wants. When in reality all I'm doing is giving it that placebo. This is exactly why the use of patches, gum, nasal sprays or any other form of nicotine is totally not acceptable, because they continue to feed the addiction. It is also why products like fake dip, seeds, gum, cat shit or whatever are acceptable the satisfy the habit but provide no nicotine for the addiction.
Definition of ADDICTION
1 the quality or state of being addicted
2 compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal; broadly: persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful
Definition of HABIT
1. an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary: the habit of looking both ways before crossing the street.
2. customary practice or use: Daily bathing is an American habit.
3. a particular practice, custom, or usage: the habit of shaking hands.
4. a dominant or regular disposition or tendency; prevailing character or quality: She has a habit of looking at the bright side of things.
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Am I an ADDICT OR DO I HAVE A HABIT??
I have seen this bantered about here on KTC since I first joined and people often mistakenly say that they have the bad habit of nicotine use. The putting nicotine into the body is definitely an addiction! I have been addicted to nicotine for years and my use is perfectly described in the following definition of Addiction. If you read further the definition of a Habit, my use of smokeless tobacco I contend was a habit. The main reason that I use to prove that it was a habit is that the use of fake dip wouldn't do any good for the addiction but it would satisfy the habit. I used fake dip for the first 50- 60 days of my quit on a regular basis, and then it just started becoming more of an annoyance. Now I keep it around for when my addiction causes me to crave the nicotine. The fake dip tricks my body into thinking that I'm feeding it the same thing It desires and wants. When in reality all I'm doing is giving it that placebo. This is exactly why the use of patches, gum, nasal sprays or any other form of nicotine is totally not acceptable, because they continue to feed the addiction. It is also why products like fake dip, seeds, gum, cat shit or whatever are acceptable the satisfy the habit but provide no nicotine for the addiction.
Definition of ADDICTION
1 the quality or state of being addicted
2 compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal; broadly: persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful
Definition of HABIT
1. an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary: the habit of looking both ways before crossing the street.
2. customary practice or use: Daily bathing is an American habit.
3. a particular practice, custom, or usage: the habit of shaking hands.
4. a dominant or regular disposition or tendency; prevailing character or quality: She has a habit of looking at the bright side of things.
I am a tad confused what your final verdict is ...habit or addiction ?
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Am I an ADDICT OR DO I HAVE A HABIT??
I have seen this bantered about here on KTC since I first joined and people often mistakenly say that they have the bad habit of nicotine use. The putting nicotine into the body is definitely an addiction! I have been addicted to nicotine for years and my use is perfectly described in the following definition of Addiction. If you read further the definition of a Habit, my use of smokeless tobacco I contend was a habit. The main reason that I use to prove that it was a habit is that the use of fake dip wouldn't do any good for the addiction but it would satisfy the habit. I used fake dip for the first 50- 60 days of my quit on a regular basis, and then it just started becoming more of an annoyance. Now I keep it around for when my addiction causes me to crave the nicotine. The fake dip tricks my body into thinking that I'm feeding it the same thing It desires and wants. When in reality all I'm doing is giving it that placebo. This is exactly why the use of patches, gum, nasal sprays or any other form of nicotine is totally not acceptable, because they continue to feed the addiction. It is also why products like fake dip, seeds, gum, cat shit or whatever are acceptable the satisfy the habit but provide no nicotine for the addiction.
Definition of ADDICTION
1 the quality or state of being addicted
2 compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal; broadly: persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful
Definition of HABIT
1. an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary: the habit of looking both ways before crossing the street.
2. customary practice or use: Daily bathing is an American habit.
3. a particular practice, custom, or usage: the habit of shaking hands.
4. a dominant or regular disposition or tendency; prevailing character or quality: She has a habit of looking at the bright side of things.
I am a tad confused what your final verdict is ...habit or addiction ?
No question about it and I didnt mean to stutter I'm an addict But I also had a habit of always having something in my mouth!
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Am I an ADDICT OR DO I HAVE A HABIT??
I have seen this bantered about here on KTC since I first joined and people often mistakenly say that they have the bad habit of nicotine use. The putting nicotine into the body is definitely an addiction! I have been addicted to nicotine for years and my use is perfectly described in the following definition of Addiction. If you read further the definition of a Habit, my use of smokeless tobacco I contend was a habit. The main reason that I use to prove that it was a habit is that the use of fake dip wouldn't do any good for the addiction but it would satisfy the habit. I used fake dip for the first 50- 60 days of my quit on a regular basis, and then it just started becoming more of an annoyance. Now I keep it around for when my addiction causes me to crave the nicotine. The fake dip tricks my body into thinking that I'm feeding it the same thing It desires and wants. When in reality all I'm doing is giving it that placebo. This is exactly why the use of patches, gum, nasal sprays or any other form of nicotine is totally not acceptable, because they continue to feed the addiction. It is also why products like fake dip, seeds, gum, cat shit or whatever are acceptable the satisfy the habit but provide no nicotine for the addiction.
Definition of ADDICTION
1 the quality or state of being addicted
2 compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal; broadly: persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful
Definition of HABIT
1. an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary: the habit of looking both ways before crossing the street.
2. customary practice or use: Daily bathing is an American habit.
3. a particular practice, custom, or usage: the habit of shaking hands.
4. a dominant or regular disposition or tendency; prevailing character or quality: She has a habit of looking at the bright side of things.
I am a tad confused what your final verdict is ...habit or addiction ?
No question about it and I didnt mean to stutter I'm an addict But I also had a habit of always having something in my mouth!
So did you spit or swallow? :)
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WARNINGS THAT SHOULD HAVE LEAD EACH OF US TO QUIT DIP!!
I always tried to ignore or pretend I didn't see the warning.
WARNING: This product can cause mouth cancer.
WARNING: This product can cause gum disease and tooth loss.
WARNING: This product is not a safe alternative to cigarettes.
WARNING: Smokeless tobacco is addictive
6 WARNINGS THAT SHOULD HAVE LEAD ME TO QUIT DIP!!
1. In 1983 I watched my grandmother die a dreadful death from CANCER.
2. In 1989 I watched my Sister-in-law get CANCER at the age of 26, she went into remission only to have it return a year later in her brain and she died leaving a 3 yr. old daughter with a father that died 1 yr. later of nicotine addiction related disease.
3. In 1990 I watched my good friend and hunting buddy Roe die of ORAL CANCER from dipping. Read his story in my early intro titled Why Quit April 23 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6243&st=90)
4. In 1995 my younger brother was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma. He survived but the Dr. warned the family of the propensity of CANCER in our family.
5. In 2000 the same brother had a daughter also get stage 4 melanoma. Now the Dr. say that the propensity just greatly increased.
6. Over the past 20 yrs. I have had numerous skin cancers and precancerous spots removed, but ignored the warnings.
It doesn't matter that the reason I quit had nothing to do with these 6 warnings that I was given, what matters is that I quit and that NICOTINE IS NO LONGER A PART OF MY LIFE.
WARNING: To all smokeless tobacco users that may be reading this and not yet quit, QUIT!
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INTEGRITY
The past couple of days I've been reflecting upon the journey that I've been on. I had a conversation with a quit brother in chat the other day that lead to several pm's and some really deep thought for me. We had discussed integrity. I told him that I thought that I had integrity in most every aspect of my life but the ninja dipping that I had been involved in for nearly 40 yrs. Upon reflection I started questioning myself, was that statement really true? What is integrity?
in·teg·ri·ty/inˈtegritç/Noun:
1.The quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.
2.The state of being whole and undivided: "territorial integrity".
Another definition that I like for integrity is what you do when no one is looking (or you don't think they are looking) In my reflecting on this journey I've read back in my intro and alot of the personal messages I've sent and recieved. Some of the things that I have said, (even if for shock value) are not things that meet up to my moral principles. Thus I've determined that I don't have near the integrity that I thought I had.
This conversation with this brother has lead me to rethinking my quit and my relationship with my fellow quiters. My Quit has been strengthened, I believe that my personal integrity can also be strengthened in this process. But just like my fight with my addiction my fight with being who I really am or want to be doesn't come automatic it must be worked on. Thank You Bro.
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INTEGRITY
The past couple of days I've been reflecting upon the journey that I've been on. I had a conversation with a quit brother in chat the other day that lead to several pm's and some really deep thought for me. We had discussed integrity. I told him that I thought that I had integrity in most every aspect of my life but the ninja dipping that I had been involved in for nearly 40 yrs. Upon reflection I started questioning myself, was that statement really true? What is integrity?
in·teg·ri·ty/inˈtegritç/Noun:
1.The quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.
2.The state of being whole and undivided: "territorial integrity".
Another definition that I like for integrity is what you do when no one is looking (or you don't think they are looking) In my reflecting on this journey I've read back in my intro and alot of the personal messages I've sent and recieved. Some of the things that I have said, (even if for shock value) are not things that meet up to my moral principles. Thus I've determined that I don't have near the integrity that I thought I had.
This conversation with this brother has lead me to rethinking my quit and my relationship with my fellow quiters. My Quit has been strengthened, I believe that my personal integrity can also be strengthened in this process. But just like my fight with my addiction my fight with being who I really am or want to be doesn't come automatic it must be worked on. Thank You Bro.
Its okay to be human. While you may have not been perfect in your words, I have a feeling that your heart has always been in the right place.
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INTEGRITY
Another definition that I like for integrity is what you do when no one is looking (or you don't think they are looking) In my reflecting on this journey I've read back in my intro and alot of the personal messages I've sent and recieved. Some of the things that I have said, (even if for shock value) are not things that meet up to my moral principles. Thus I've determined that I don't have near the integrity that I thought I had.
This conversation with this brother has lead me to rethinking my quit and my relationship with my fellow quiters. My Quit has been strengthened, I believe that my personal integrity can also be strengthened in this process. But just like my fight with my addiction my fight with being who I really am or want to be doesn't come automatic it must be worked on. Thank You Bro.
It's always good to do some self reflection and attempt to make improvements. Having low morals and lacking integrity are the last words I would use describing your posting style.
It is true some members go overboard with their posts attacking people. It's just a pack mentality that some people feel gives them carte blanche to act poorly.
That doesn't apply to you. I have always thought your posts are well thought out and give good insight. Keep it up IMO 'Popcorn'
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INTEGRITY
The past couple of days I've been reflecting upon the journey that I've been on. I had a conversation with a quit brother in chat the other day that lead to several pm's and some really deep thought for me. We had discussed integrity. I told him that I thought that I had integrity in most every aspect of my life but the ninja dipping that I had been involved in for nearly 40 yrs. Upon reflection I started questioning myself, was that statement really true? What is integrity?
in·teg·ri·ty/inˈtegritç/Noun:
1.The quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.
2.The state of being whole and undivided: "territorial integrity".
Another definition that I like for integrity is what you do when no one is looking (or you don't think they are looking) In my reflecting on this journey I've read back in my intro and alot of the personal messages I've sent and recieved. Some of the things that I have said, (even if for shock value) are not things that meet up to my moral principles. Thus I've determined that I don't have near the integrity that I thought I had.Â
This conversation with this brother has lead me to rethinking my quit and my relationship with my fellow quiters. My Quit has been strengthened, I believe that my personal integrity can also be strengthened in this process. But just like my fight with my addiction my fight with being who I really am or want to be doesn't come automatic it must be worked on. Thank You Bro.
Its okay to be human. While you may have not been perfect in your words, I have a feeling that your heart has always been in the right place.
We can all be very harsh critics of ourselves. Reflection is good as long as you learn something from it and move on. I am certainly not the same person I was when I began this journey and most of the change has been through long hard looks in the mirror brought about by discussions from this site.
Proud to be quit with you..
Greg
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INTEGRITY
Another definition that I like for integrity is what you do when no one is looking (or you don't think they are looking) In my reflecting on this journey I've read back in my intro and alot of the personal messages I've sent and recieved. Some of the things that I have said, (even if for shock value) are not things that meet up to my moral principles. Thus I've determined that I don't have near the integrity that I thought I had.Â
This conversation with this brother has lead me to rethinking my quit and my relationship with my fellow quiters. My Quit has been strengthened, I believe that my personal integrity can also be strengthened in this process. But just like my fight with my addiction my fight with being who I really am or want to be doesn't come automatic it must be worked on. Thank You Bro.
It's always good to do some self reflection and attempt to make improvements. Having low morals and lacking integrity are the last words I would use describing your posting style.
It is true some members go overboard with their posts attacking people. It's just a pack mentality that some people feel gives them carte blanche to act poorly.
That doesn't apply to you. I have always thought your posts are well thought out and give good insight. Keep it up IMO 'Popcorn'
WT, one thing about having integrity...you can't claim it. Integrity can only be yours if other people bestow that title to you.
Humans may not be absolute or perfect. We all learn and grow.
Simple thoughts of how to improve are good. Over analyzing your every move can slow down your momentum.
I have met you, we have talked about many subjects. I see you as a man of integrity.
That's all, enjoy life. Don't sweat simple screw ups. You quit because you wanted to live long and take care of your wife. Sorry my friend, that looks like a man full of love, selflessness and integrity.
Stop licking your wounds and just let them heal!
Now I am still on vacation...off to boogie board with my kids.
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INTEGRITY
The past couple of days I've been reflecting upon the journey that I've been on. I had a conversation with a quit brother in chat the other day that lead to several pm's and some really deep thought for me. We had discussed integrity. I told him that I thought that I had integrity in most every aspect of my life but the ninja dipping that I had been involved in for nearly 40 yrs. Upon reflection I started questioning myself, was that statement really true? What is integrity?
in·teg·ri·ty/inˈtegritç/Noun:
1.The quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.
2.The state of being whole and undivided: "territorial integrity".
Another definition that I like for integrity is what you do when no one is looking (or you don't think they are looking) In my reflecting on this journey I've read back in my intro and alot of the personal messages I've sent and recieved. Some of the things that I have said, (even if for shock value) are not things that meet up to my moral principles. Thus I've determined that I don't have near the integrity that I thought I had.Â
This conversation with this brother has lead me to rethinking my quit and my relationship with my fellow quiters. My Quit has been strengthened, I believe that my personal integrity can also be strengthened in this process. But just like my fight with my addiction my fight with being who I really am or want to be doesn't come automatic it must be worked on. Thank You Bro.
Its okay to be human. While you may have not been perfect in your words, I have a feeling that your heart has always been in the right place.
We can all be very harsh critics of ourselves. Reflection is good as long as you learn something from it and move on. I am certainly not the same person I was when I began this journey and most of the change has been through long hard looks in the mirror brought about by discussions from this site.
Proud to be quit with you..
Greg
Thanks! I know I'm only human and that good I'm proud of my progress, hell I've gone 89 days without nicotine! I have been there for others, I've learned to reach to others for help. I've learned more about myself this past 3 months than I could have ever imagined. Removing nicotine from my life has opened my eyes to so much I've missed in life. I've met new people who will be life long friends, my relationship with my wife is better than its been in 32 yrs. I'm just reminding myself where I have come from and where I'm headed. Believe me I don't expect myself to change overnight. Just recording the progress! I didn't mean to come across as really down on myself just recognizing my addiction has shadowed and effected other aspects of my life without me recognizing it.
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My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it.
50 days ago this was my attitude. As I reflect on the event that for me comes in just 9 days I have a completely different prospective and attitude.
I now recognize the great accomplishment that going 100 days without my life long partner in addiction is. I know that it is just a very short trial period but none the less it is a milestone in my very long addiction.
As I evaluate the past 90 - 95 days since my journey of quit began I am glad that I have recorded my feelings and attitudes throughout. We often have people say that the programming process is part of our journey. I've heard people say that they feel very bipolar in this process, That is such a good description of how I feel. Going back through my posts, thoughts and comments over the past it is easy to see the highs and the lows. I will never be able to thank those that have urged me on, kicked me in the ass or were just there if I needed someone to talk to, enough for their support.
For me the past 25 - 30 days have seemed to be the most difficult days of my quit. Maybe its because they are fresher in mind but I don't think so. I really believe that they have been more challenging because they have dealt with me learning and reprogramming the entire way I live my life. It is difficult to break old habits. The day to day life routines are patterns and habits. Our bodies resist change, not just in the addiction but in these day to day habits that we have established.
The other day Mthomas told me to quit licking my wounds. I was bothered by that and was even offended because I really didn't think that in relationship to my nicotine use I was feeling sorry for myself or even whining about the process that I'm going through. I feel that I've accepted and owned my addiction quite well. After some more thought and evaluation he was right but it wasn't the pain that nicotine withdrawal brought about that I was dealing with but it was the reprogramming and adjusting my entire life to be nicotine free. There are quite a few of us quitters out there that are 35 + yr addicts and we've set some pretty deep seated life patterns or habits and I thought well It may be more difficult to reprogram the longer that we've been addicted. Then I rethought that idea, that is just more licking the wounds and feeling sorry for myself that I've been a worthless addict longer than most of you.
Again I'm so proud of my QUIT. I feel better about myself than I have felt in a very, very long time. I thank KTC and a bunch of really cool addicts for helping me this far and look forward to what is to come. I'm not going to apologize for my actions or the way I've dealt with them. I'm going on and will continue to learn to live my life nicotine free the best that I can with your help.
-
My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it.
50 days ago this was my attitude. As I reflect on the event that for me comes in just 9 days I have a completely different prospective and attitude.
I now recognize the great accomplishment that going 100 days without my life long partner in addiction is. I know that it is just a very short trial period but none the less it is a milestone in my very long addiction.
As I evaluate the past 90 - 95 days since my journey of quit began I am glad that I have recorded my feelings and attitudes throughout. We often have people say that the programming process is part of our journey. I've heard people say that they feel very bipolar in this process, That is such a good description of how I feel. Going back through my posts, thoughts and comments over the past it is easy to see the highs and the lows. I will never be able to thank those that have urged me on, kicked me in the ass or were just there if I needed someone to talk to, enough for their support.
For me the past 25 - 30 days have seemed to be the most difficult days of my quit. Maybe its because they are fresher in mind but I don't think so. I really believe that they have been more challenging because they have dealt with me learning and reprogramming the entire way I live my life. It is difficult to break old habits. The day to day life routines are patterns and habits. Our bodies resist change, not just in the addiction but in these day to day habits that we have established.
The other day Mthomas told me to quit licking my wounds. I was bothered by that and was even offended because I really didn't think that in relationship to my nicotine use I was feeling sorry for myself or even whining about the process that I'm going through. I feel that I've accepted and owned my addiction quite well. After some more thought and evaluation he was right but it wasn't the pain that nicotine withdrawal brought about that I was dealing with but it was the reprogramming and adjusting my entire life to be nicotine free. There are quite a few of us quitters out there that are 35 + yr addicts and we've set some pretty deep seated life patterns or habits and I thought well It may be more difficult to reprogram the longer that we've been addicted. Then I rethought that idea, that is just more licking the wounds and feeling sorry for myself that I've been a worthless addict longer than most of you.
Again I'm so proud of my QUIT. I feel better about myself than I have felt in a very, very long time. I thank KTC and a bunch of really cool addicts for helping me this far and look forward to what is to come. I'm not going to apologize for my actions or the way I've dealt with them. I'm going on and will continue to learn to live my life nicotine free the best that I can with your help.
Good stuff. You are restoring back to the original you. It has probably been so long since you knew him you did not recognize him. Well done. Proud to quit with you.
-
My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it.
50 days ago this was my attitude. As I reflect on the event that for me comes in just 9 days I have a completely different prospective and attitude.
I now recognize the great accomplishment that going 100 days without my life long partner in addiction is. I know that it is just a very short trial period but none the less it is a milestone in my very long addiction.
As I evaluate the past 90 - 95 days since my journey of quit began I am glad that I have recorded my feelings and attitudes throughout. We often have people say that the programming process is part of our journey. I've heard people say that they feel very bipolar in this process, That is such a good description of how I feel. Going back through my posts, thoughts and comments over the past it is easy to see the highs and the lows. I will never be able to thank those that have urged me on, kicked me in the ass or were just there if I needed someone to talk to, enough for their support.
For me the past 25 - 30 days have seemed to be the most difficult days of my quit. Maybe its because they are fresher in mind but I don't think so. I really believe that they have been more challenging because they have dealt with me learning and reprogramming the entire way I live my life. It is difficult to break old habits. The day to day life routines are patterns and habits. Our bodies resist change, not just in the addiction but in these day to day habits that we have established.
The other day Mthomas told me to quit licking my wounds. I was bothered by that and was even offended because I really didn't think that in relationship to my nicotine use I was feeling sorry for myself or even whining about the process that I'm going through. I feel that I've accepted and owned my addiction quite well. After some more thought and evaluation he was right but it wasn't the pain that nicotine withdrawal brought about that I was dealing with but it was the reprogramming and adjusting my entire life to be nicotine free. There are quite a few of us quitters out there that are 35 + yr addicts and we've set some pretty deep seated life patterns or habits and I thought well It may be more difficult to reprogram the longer that we've been addicted. Then I rethought that idea, that is just more licking the wounds and feeling sorry for myself that I've been a worthless addict longer than most of you.
Again I'm so proud of my QUIT. I feel better about myself than I have felt in a very, very long time. I thank KTC and a bunch of really cool addicts for helping me this far and look forward to what is to come. I'm not going to apologize for my actions or the way I've dealt with them. I'm going on and will continue to learn to live my life nicotine free the best that I can with your help.
Good stuff. You are restoring back to the original you. It has probably been so long since you knew him you did not recognize him. Well done. Proud to quit with you.
Having completed 7 marathons (yes, this was 10 years ago) I can absolutely tell you every single time, crossing the finish line was anti climatic. As a matter of fact, after finishing each one, there was a let down.
I would imagine HOF is similar.
But, as in marathon running, it's not about the finish line. It's about the training, the process and who you become in that process.
With the KTC process, we become bad ass quitters. I am looking forward to seeing how this discipline spills over to other parts of life.
Always quit with you WT, even thru all my rages
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My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it.
50 days ago this was my attitude. As I reflect on the event that for me comes in just 9 days I have a completely different prospective and attitude.
I now recognize the great accomplishment that going 100 days without my life long partner in addiction is. I know that it is just a very short trial period but none the less it is a milestone in my very long addiction.
As I evaluate the past 90 - 95 days since my journey of quit began I am glad that I have recorded my feelings and attitudes throughout. We often have people say that the programming process is part of our journey. I've heard people say that they feel very bipolar in this process, That is such a good description of how I feel. Going back through my posts, thoughts and comments over the past it is easy to see the highs and the lows. I will never be able to thank those that have urged me on, kicked me in the ass or were just there if I needed someone to talk to, enough for their support.
For me the past 25 - 30 days have seemed to be the most difficult days of my quit. Maybe its because they are fresher in mind but I don't think so. I really believe that they have been more challenging because they have dealt with me learning and reprogramming the entire way I live my life. It is difficult to break old habits. The day to day life routines are patterns and habits. Our bodies resist change, not just in the addiction but in these day to day habits that we have established.
The other day Mthomas told me to quit licking my wounds. I was bothered by that and was even offended because I really didn't think that in relationship to my nicotine use I was feeling sorry for myself or even whining about the process that I'm going through. I feel that I've accepted and owned my addiction quite well. After some more thought and evaluation he was right but it wasn't the pain that nicotine withdrawal brought about that I was dealing with but it was the reprogramming and adjusting my entire life to be nicotine free. There are quite a few of us quitters out there that are 35 + yr addicts and we've set some pretty deep seated life patterns or habits and I thought well It may be more difficult to reprogram the longer that we've been addicted. Then I rethought that idea, that is just more licking the wounds and feeling sorry for myself that I've been a worthless addict longer than most of you.
Again I'm so proud of my QUIT. I feel better about myself than I have felt in a very, very long time. I thank KTC and a bunch of really cool addicts for helping me this far and look forward to what is to come. I'm not going to apologize for my actions or the way I've dealt with them. I'm going on and will continue to learn to live my life nicotine free the best that I can with your help.
Good stuff. You are restoring back to the original you. It has probably been so long since you knew him you did not recognize him. Well done. Proud to quit with you.
Having completed 7 marathons (yes, this was 10 years ago) I can absolutely tell you every single time, crossing the finish line was anti climatic. As a matter of fact, after finishing each one, there was a let down.
I would imagine HOF is similar.
But, as in marathon running, it's not about the finish line. It's about the training, the process and who you become in that process.
With the KTC process, we become bad ass quitters. I am looking forward to seeing how this discipline spills over to other parts of life.
Always quit with you WT, even thru all my rages
Excellent. Quit with you today
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My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it.
50 days ago this was my attitude. As I reflect on the event that for me comes in just 9 days I have a completely different prospective and attitude.
I now recognize the great accomplishment that going 100 days without my life long partner in addiction is. I know that it is just a very short trial period but none the less it is a milestone in my very long addiction.
As I evaluate the past 90 - 95 days since my journey of quit began I am glad that I have recorded my feelings and attitudes throughout. We often have people say that the programming process is part of our journey. I've heard people say that they feel very bipolar in this process, That is such a good description of how I feel. Going back through my posts, thoughts and comments over the past it is easy to see the highs and the lows. I will never be able to thank those that have urged me on, kicked me in the ass or were just there if I needed someone to talk to, enough for their support.
For me the past 25 - 30 days have seemed to be the most difficult days of my quit. Maybe its because they are fresher in mind but I don't think so. I really believe that they have been more challenging because they have dealt with me learning and reprogramming the entire way I live my life. It is difficult to break old habits. The day to day life routines are patterns and habits. Our bodies resist change, not just in the addiction but in these day to day habits that we have established.
The other day Mthomas told me to quit licking my wounds. I was bothered by that and was even offended because I really didn't think that in relationship to my nicotine use I was feeling sorry for myself or even whining about the process that I'm going through. I feel that I've accepted and owned my addiction quite well. After some more thought and evaluation he was right but it wasn't the pain that nicotine withdrawal brought about that I was dealing with but it was the reprogramming and adjusting my entire life to be nicotine free. There are quite a few of us quitters out there that are 35 + yr addicts and we've set some pretty deep seated life patterns or habits and I thought well It may be more difficult to reprogram the longer that we've been addicted. Then I rethought that idea, that is just more licking the wounds and feeling sorry for myself that I've been a worthless addict longer than most of you.
Again I'm so proud of my QUIT. I feel better about myself than I have felt in a very, very long time. I thank KTC and a bunch of really cool addicts for helping me this far and look forward to what is to come. I'm not going to apologize for my actions or the way I've dealt with them. I'm going on and will continue to learn to live my life nicotine free the best that I can with your help.
Good stuff. You are restoring back to the original you. It has probably been so long since you knew him you did not recognize him. Well done. Proud to quit with you.
Having completed 7 marathons (yes, this was 10 years ago) I can absolutely tell you every single time, crossing the finish line was anti climatic. As a matter of fact, after finishing each one, there was a let down.
I would imagine HOF is similar.
But, as in marathon running, it's not about the finish line. It's about the training, the process and who you become in that process.
With the KTC process, we become bad ass quitters. I am looking forward to seeing how this discipline spills over to other parts of life.
Always quit with you WT, even thru all my rages
Excellent. Quit with you today
Wade....you and me buddy. We are gonna tear a new roof on the HoF. They are gonna have to give us our own wing. (Mostly because of DAG and cleanfuel, but its still ours)
And clean....you fat bro. 'crackup'
-
I want to revisit my cave.
cave v.intr.
1. To fall in; collapse.
2. To give up all opposition; yield.
My Cave continues:
In the beginning on March 28, , as an answer to prayer I found and joined a foreign group, KTC. I resisted the pressure from the group to become a full-fledged quitter. I had a plan, my plan was good, I had put a lot of thought and planning into it. For the next 2 nights I couldnÂ’t sleep I paced the floor and then would read more. I didnÂ’t go into chat, I didnÂ’t post any questions I just read. I saw addicts get told that the only way was to throw it away and quit and do it now! So at 1:30 am April 1, I secretively flushed everything and after I quit crying I posted my first promise:[ Posted: Apr 1, 2012, 2:27 am]
Wt57 day 1 no April fool joke I've paced the floor al night I quit!!!
38 yr of slavery I'm here for the long haul.
That was my 1st cave and it was a big one. And now I’m still here for the “Long Haul” one day at a time!
My next cave was the experience of witnessing what happens when a fellow addict whines about how hard it is to post roll or do what everyone else is doing. I was less than 1 week into my quit and I caved I didn't like seeing someone that was trying to stop get harassed and I told Bruce to back-off his harassment and quit being prickish. “Opps” I learned my 1st really valuable lesson that day, If we don’t make the promise early and take the promise that we make that day serious we just as well pack our bag and go home. Thank you Bruce!
There have been a lot of newbies come and go over the past 3 months. It is exciting to see the enthusiasm of new quitters, and it is sad to see the Bitch pull them back into their addiction. A fellow July Junkie that quit just a few days after me became a friend, we talked late at night we sent pms and shared the struggles that we were going through. One day he missed roll, I tried to call, no answer. The next day he posted roll but still no contact. The following day he missed roll again,and again and again. It was obvious that he caved. That was my next cave experience; I was really hurt, I took his cave personal. I've learned that we can't quit for anyone but ourself. If someone isn't ready to make the committment to quit they won't stay quit, it is as simple as that. (update: I texted my friend a few weeks ago to check on him and he responded and he is now returned and pushing strong with October) Welcome back Bryan!
IÂ’ve had only one day that I really feared Caving. I faced the Bitch head on and she hit me with all she had, even put some little prick next to me that kept spitting at my feet. The smell of the cope he was dribbling even turned my stomach. This experience turned out to be one of my best days and strengthened my resolve. So "up yours Bitch" that backfired.
The first few weeks of my quit were dominated by thoughts of "woe is me" I'm the old bastard that is slow to learn and that these younger guys are not going to miss out on all the things that I did because I chose the bitch over life. Then I went into several phases of feeling sorry for myself because changing my entire way of living was hard. I kept wanting to bring up the past. Then I'd jump to feeling like there was no reason to stay quit ( I would fail down the road 1 yr., 2yrs. or sometime) so screw it lets just skip the pain. Several of my new friends had to shake me, call me out on my bitching and whining and tell me to MAN UP! It has taken some time but I'm making progress and life is really improving. I'm enjoying life. I'm smelling the roses instead of spitting on them.
I remember on day 50 I again thought that 100 days was nothing in the long term of life. I said "100 days-----not even a drop in the bucket" I again at that time resolved to only quit 1 day at a time. Now that the 100 days is arriving it is monumental, I will cherish the day and every day that has lead me here. I also cherish and embrace everyday of suck along the way that I may never have to repeat them.
-
I want to revisit my cave.
cave v.intr.
1. To fall in; collapse.
2. To give up all opposition; yield.
My Cave continues:
In the beginning on March 28, , as an answer to prayer I found and joined a foreign group, KTC. I resisted the pressure from the group to become a full-fledged quitter. I had a plan, my plan was good, I had put a lot of thought and planning into it. For the next 2 nights I couldnÂ’t sleep I paced the floor and then would read more. I didnÂ’t go into chat, I didnÂ’t post any questions I just read. I saw addicts get told that the only way was to throw it away and quit and do it now! So at 1:30 am April 1, I secretively flushed everything and after I quit crying I posted my first promise:[ Posted: Apr 1, 2012, 2:27 am]
Wt57 day 1 no April fool joke I've paced the floor al night I quit!!!
38 yr of slavery I'm here for the long haul.
That was my 1st cave and it was a big one. And now I’m still here for the “Long Haul” one day at a time!
My next cave was the experience of witnessing what happens when a fellow addict whines about how hard it is to post roll or do what everyone else is doing. I was less than 1 week into my quit and I caved I didn't like seeing someone that was trying to stop get harassed and I told Bruce to back-off his harassment and quit being prickish. “Opps” I learned my 1st really valuable lesson that day, If we don’t make the promise early and take the promise that we make that day serious we just as well pack our bag and go home. Thank you Bruce!
There have been a lot of newbies come and go over the past 3 months. It is exciting to see the enthusiasm of new quitters, and it is sad to see the Bitch pull them back into their addiction. A fellow July Junkie that quit just a few days after me became a friend, we talked late at night we sent pms and shared the struggles that we were going through. One day he missed roll, I tried to call, no answer. The next day he posted roll but still no contact. The following day he missed roll again,and again and again. It was obvious that he caved. That was my next cave experience; I was really hurt, I took his cave personal. I've learned that we can't quit for anyone but ourself. If someone isn't ready to make the committment to quit they won't stay quit, it is as simple as that. (update: I texted my friend a few weeks ago to check on him and he responded and he is now returned and pushing strong with October) Welcome back Bryan!
IÂ’ve had only one day that I really feared Caving. I faced the Bitch head on and she hit me with all she had, even put some little prick next to me that kept spitting at my feet. The smell of the cope he was dribbling even turned my stomach. This experience turned out to be one of my best days and strengthened my resolve. So "up yours Bitch" that backfired.
The first few weeks of my quit were dominated by thoughts of "woe is me" I'm the old bastard that is slow to learn and that these younger guys are not going to miss out on all the things that I did because I chose the bitch over life. Then I went into several phases of feeling sorry for myself because changing my entire way of living was hard. I kept wanting to bring up the past. Then I'd jump to feeling like there was no reason to stay quit ( I would fail down the road 1 yr., 2yrs. or sometime) so screw it lets just skip the pain. Several of my new friends had to shake me, call me out on my bitching and whining and tell me to MAN UP! It has taken some time but I'm making progress and life is really improving. I'm enjoying life. I'm smelling the roses instead of spitting on them.
I remember on day 50 I again thought that 100 days was nothing in the long term of life. I said "100 days-----not even a drop in the bucket" I again at that time resolved to only quit 1 day at a time. Now that the 100 days is arriving it is monumental, I will cherish the day and every day that has lead me here. I also cherish and embrace everyday of suck along the way that I may never have to repeat them.
Wade, youre a badass quitter and seeing what you were on day 6 to what you are now is truly an inspiration. I'm glad I could help in some small way, but bro you had this in you from the beginning. Remember one day at a time, remember you are an addict and most importantly remember day 1. Do those brother, and you will win.
I quit with you today wt
-
I want to revisit my cave.
cave v.intr.
1. To fall in; collapse.
2. To give up all opposition; yield.
My Cave continues:
In the beginning on March 28, , as an answer to prayer I found and joined a foreign group, KTC. I resisted the pressure from the group to become a full-fledged quitter. I had a plan, my plan was good, I had put a lot of thought and planning into it. For the next 2 nights I couldn’t sleep I paced the floor and then would read more. I didn’t go into chat, I didn’t post any questions I just read. I saw addicts get told that the only way was to throw it away and quit and do it now! So at 1:30 am April 1, I secretively flushed everything and after I quit crying I posted my first promise:[ Posted: Apr 1, 2012, 2:27 am]
Wt57 day 1 no April fool joke I've paced the floor al night I quit!!!
38 yr of slavery I'm here for the long haul.
That was my 1st cave and it was a big one. And now I’m still here for the “Long Haul” one day at a time!
My next cave was the experience of witnessing what happens when a fellow addict whines about how hard it is to post roll or do what everyone else is doing. I was less than 1 week into my quit and I caved I didn't like seeing someone that was trying to stop get harassed and I told Bruce to back-off his harassment and quit being prickish. “Opps” I learned my 1st really valuable lesson that day, If we don’t make the promise early and take the promise that we make that day serious we just as well pack our bag and go home. Thank you Bruce!
There have been a lot of newbies come and go over the past 3 months. It is exciting to see the enthusiasm of new quitters, and it is sad to see the Bitch pull them back into their addiction. A fellow July Junkie that quit just a few days after me became a friend, we talked late at night we sent pms and shared the struggles that we were going through. One day he missed roll, I tried to call, no answer. The next day he posted roll but still no contact. The following day he missed roll again,and again and again. It was obvious that he caved. That was my next cave experience; I was really hurt, I took his cave personal. I've learned that we can't quit for anyone but ourself. If someone isn't ready to make the committment to quit they won't stay quit, it is as simple as that. (update: I texted my friend a few weeks ago to check on him and he responded and he is now returned and pushing strong with October) Welcome back Bryan!
IÂ’ve had only one day that I really feared Caving. I faced the Bitch head on and she hit me with all she had, even put some little prick next to me that kept spitting at my feet. The smell of the cope he was dribbling even turned my stomach. This experience turned out to be one of my best days and strengthened my resolve. So "up yours Bitch" that backfired.
The first few weeks of my quit were dominated by thoughts of "woe is me" I'm the old bastard that is slow to learn and that these younger guys are not going to miss out on all the things that I did because I chose the bitch over life. Then I went into several phases of feeling sorry for myself because changing my entire way of living was hard. I kept wanting to bring up the past. Then I'd jump to feeling like there was no reason to stay quit ( I would fail down the road 1 yr., 2yrs. or sometime) so screw it lets just skip the pain. Several of my new friends had to shake me, call me out on my bitching and whining and tell me to MAN UP! It has taken some time but I'm making progress and life is really improving. I'm enjoying life. I'm smelling the roses instead of spitting on them.
I remember on day 50 I again thought that 100 days was nothing in the long term of life. I said "100 days-----not even a drop in the bucket" I again at that time resolved to only quit 1 day at a time. Now that the 100 days is arriving it is monumental, I will cherish the day and every day that has lead me here. I also cherish and embrace everyday of suck along the way that I may never have to repeat them.
Wade, youre a badass quitter and seeing what you were on day 6 to what you are now is truly an inspiration. I'm glad I could help in some small way, but bro you had this in you from the beginning. Remember one day at a time, remember you are an addict and most importantly remember day 1. Do those brother, and you will win.
I quit with you today wt
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
-
I want to revisit my cave.
cave v.intr.
1. To fall in; collapse.
2. To give up all opposition; yield.
My Cave continues:
In the beginning on March 28, , as an answer to prayer I found and joined a foreign group, KTC.  I resisted the pressure from the group to become a full-fledged quitter. I had a plan, my plan was good, I had put a lot of thought and planning into it. For the next 2 nights I couldn’t sleep I paced the floor and then would read more. I didn’t go into chat, I didn’t post any questions I just read. I saw addicts get told that the only way was to throw it away and quit and do it now! So at 1:30 am April 1, I secretively flushed everything and after I quit crying I posted my first promise:[ Posted: Apr 1, 2012, 2:27 am]
Wt57 day 1 no April fool joke I've paced the floor al night I quit!!!
38 yr of slavery I'm here for the long haul.
That was my 1st cave and it was a big one. And now I’m still here for the “Long Haul” one day at a time!
My next cave was the experience of witnessing what happens when a fellow addict whines about how hard it is to post roll or do what everyone else is doing. I was less than 1 week into my quit and I caved I didn't like seeing someone that was trying to stop get harassed and I told Bruce to back-off his harassment and quit being prickish. “Opps” I learned my 1st really valuable lesson that day, If we don’t make the promise early and take the promise that we make that day serious we just as well pack our bag and go home. Thank you Bruce!
There have been a lot of newbies come and go over the past 3 months. It is exciting to see the enthusiasm of new quitters, and it is sad to see the Bitch pull them back into their addiction. A fellow July Junkie that quit just a few days after me became a friend, we talked late at night we sent pms and shared the struggles that we were going through. One day he missed roll, I tried to call, no answer. The next day he posted roll but still no contact. The following day he missed roll again,and again and again. It was obvious that he caved. That was my next cave experience; I was really hurt, I took his cave personal. I've learned that we can't quit for anyone but ourself. If someone isn't ready to make the committment to quit they won't stay quit, it is as simple as that. (update: I texted my friend a few weeks ago to check on him and he responded and he is now returned and pushing strong with October) Welcome back Bryan!
IÂ’ve had only one day that I really feared Caving. I faced the Bitch head on and she hit me with all she had, even put some little prick next to me that kept spitting at my feet. The smell of the cope he was dribbling even turned my stomach. This experience turned out to be one of my best days and strengthened my resolve. So "up yours Bitch" that backfired.
The first few weeks of my quit were dominated by thoughts of "woe is me" I'm the old bastard that is slow to learn and that these younger guys are not going to miss out on all the things that I did because I chose the bitch over life. Then I went into several phases of feeling sorry for myself because changing my entire way of living was hard. I kept wanting to bring up the past. Then I'd jump to feeling like there was no reason to stay quit ( I would fail down the road 1 yr., 2yrs. or sometime) so screw it lets just skip the pain. Several of my new friends had to shake me, call me out on my bitching and whining and tell me to MAN UP! It has taken some time but I'm making progress and life is really improving. I'm enjoying life. I'm smelling the roses instead of spitting on them.
I remember on day 50 I again thought that 100 days was nothing in the long term of life. I said "100 days-----not even a drop in the bucket" I again at that time resolved to only quit 1 day at a time. Now that the 100 days is arriving it is monumental, I will cherish the day and every day that has lead me here. I also cherish and embrace everyday of suck along the way that I may never have to repeat them.
Wade, youre a badass quitter and seeing what you were on day 6 to what you are now is truly an inspiration. I'm glad I could help in some small way, but bro you had this in you from the beginning. Remember one day at a time, remember you are an addict and most importantly remember day 1. Do those brother, and you will win.
I quit with you today wt
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Can't wait to see you walk triumphant into the HOF!
We have walked together through a lot of this. You had some tough battles but you fought. Even though you had enough on your plate with your own quit, you where very active on the site.
When a brother needed a hand...you offer both of yours. You have a humble confidence. I can't speak for God but I Imagine the day you meet your maker, he will offer both his hands to you and say, "well done"
My first experience with you on the site was reading your comment to Bruce to tell him to lay off the poor chap. I busted up and loved reading the fight. (I just had a flashback of that day.) I felt like a kid on the playground egging it on and chanting, "Fight, Fight, Fight."
It is fun to look back on the pain and drama of quitting. At the time I hated it. Today, although I never want to repeat it...I think it was a fun journey.
-
MThomas may I borrow a line from you: Christmas Eve day 99
As I set here and contemplate the past I am profoundly grateful to KTC for providing this forum to QUIT Dip!
I have been thinking about one of my many caves over the years. The particular cave that I was thinking about occurred in the spring of 1984. I had been dealing with some pretty stressful times at home and at work. I had been nicotine free for about 3 1/2 yrs. I remember buying a can of copensnuff and fondling the can. I don't think that I even opened the can the 1st day. I knew that I shouldn't do it. But the cave had been planned. I eventually convinced myself that I could be a casual dipper only using when I had really stressful days. WRONG! Soon I was using more and more often that I ever had. My next personal rationalization was that I would stop when things got easier. And on and on and on! This was followed by numerous half assed attempts to stop, most of them because my wife caught me red handed.
99 days ago as I flushed that stash I told you that I cried. Since that day I have had other experiences that have brought tears to my eyes. One was a couple weeks ago when Grizz Dipper 18 text me and told me he had thrown his stash out. Others have been either helping a fellow quitter or being helped by one of you myself.
Tonight I set at this keyboard and the tears are so very close to the surface, not because I miss the old companion, not because I am overwhelmed with a satisfaction of accomplishment, not because of my excitement to board the TRAIN OF FAME. But my reason is something that can only be understood by one who has stayed on this path of quit and joined with his or her fellow addicts to grind this addiction into the ground. It is the BROTHERHOOD, ACCOUNTABILITY and SUCCESS that we find here.
I can never thank everyone enough for the love and fellowship that I feel here. I'm not going to try to mention each of you just know that I am profoundly grateful to everyone. I will continue to be on your ass if I see you slack off and I will be there to help pull you through a funk. Like wise I will expect nothing less from you, if I am less than enthusiastic call me out on it, if you catch me licking my wounds or feeling sorry for myself point out my errors, if I am slow at posting roll I expect to have a text checking up on me.
I feel just like a little kid. I'm not going to sleep tonight, rather I'm waiting until 2.27 am (exactly 100 days since my 1st post) and post roll for the 100th time with July Freedom Lovin' Junkies (BOQ)
-
MThomas may I borrow a line from you:Â Christmas Eve day 99
As I set here and contemplate the past I am profoundly grateful to KTC for providing this forum to QUIT Dip!Â
I have been thinking about one of my many caves over the years. The particular cave that I was thinking about occurred in the spring of 1984. I had been dealing with some pretty stressful times at home and at work. I had been nicotine free for about 3 1/2 yrs. I remember buying a can of copensnuff and fondling the can. I don't think that I even opened the can the 1st day. I knew that I shouldn't do it. But the cave had been planned. I eventually convinced myself that I could be a casual dipper only using when I had really stressful days. WRONG! Soon I was using more and more often that I ever had. My next personal rationalization was that I would stop when things got easier. And on and on and on! This was followed by numerous half assed attempts to stop, most of them because my wife caught me red handed.Â
99 days ago as I flushed that stash I told you that I cried. Since that day I have had other experiences that have brought tears to my eyes. One was a couple weeks ago when Grizz Dipper 18 text me and told me he had thrown his stash out. Others have been either helping a fellow quitter or being helped by one of you myself.Â
Tonight I set at this keyboard and the tears are so very close to the surface, not because I miss the old companion, not because I am overwhelmed with a satisfaction of accomplishment, not because of my excitement to board the TRAIN OF FAME. But my reason is something that can only be understood by one who has stayed on this path of quit and joined with his or her fellow addicts to grind this addiction into the ground. It is the BROTHERHOOD, ACCOUNTABILITY and SUCCESS that we find here.
I can never thank everyone enough for the love and fellowship that I feel here. I'm not going to try to mention each of you just know that I am profoundly grateful to everyone. I will continue to be on your ass if I see you slack off and I will be there to help pull you through a funk. Like wise I will expect nothing less from you, if I am less than enthusiastic call me out on it, if you catch me licking my wounds or feeling sorry for myself point out my errors, if I am slow at posting roll I expect to have a text checking up on me.
I feel just like a little kid. I'm not going to sleep tonight, rather I'm waiting until 2.27 am (exactly 100 days since my 1st post) and post roll for the 100th time with July Freedom Lovin' Junkies (BOQ)
What is this wet salty discharge coming from my eyes? I don't cry. I don't eat quiche but I certainly can love. I loved everything about this post. WT the first time I noticed you on the site is when you told Bruce to lay off another quitter. I was relatively new but my new addiction was coming to KTC to laugh. I loved the chatter and the nic rages were so fun.
When you and Bruce went at it, I knew I liked you both. You both had passion about people and quitting. So as I sit here on your Christmas eve, I can only smile and look back at how awesome this journey has been. I loved fighting the nic bitch side by side with you. I too expect that it will continue.
The rest of my thoughts I'll PM you.
Well done sir, proud to be quit with you DICK FACE! 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
I told Shelly and the kids about that. They just laughed. Later, we were loading the boat for lake powell. I was barking orders. My daughter looked at me and said, "Calm down dick face!" Everyone rolled....even I had to look away and laugh.
-
MThomas may I borrow a line from you:Â Christmas Eve day 99
As I set here and contemplate the past I am profoundly grateful to KTC for providing this forum to QUIT Dip!Â
I have been thinking about one of my many caves over the years. The particular cave that I was thinking about occurred in the spring of 1984. I had been dealing with some pretty stressful times at home and at work. I had been nicotine free for about 3 1/2 yrs. I remember buying a can of copensnuff and fondling the can. I don't think that I even opened the can the 1st day. I knew that I shouldn't do it. But the cave had been planned. I eventually convinced myself that I could be a casual dipper only using when I had really stressful days. WRONG! Soon I was using more and more often that I ever had. My next personal rationalization was that I would stop when things got easier. And on and on and on! This was followed by numerous half assed attempts to stop, most of them because my wife caught me red handed.Â
99 days ago as I flushed that stash I told you that I cried. Since that day I have had other experiences that have brought tears to my eyes. One was a couple weeks ago when Grizz Dipper 18 text me and told me he had thrown his stash out. Others have been either helping a fellow quitter or being helped by one of you myself.Â
Tonight I set at this keyboard and the tears are so very close to the surface, not because I miss the old companion, not because I am overwhelmed with a satisfaction of accomplishment, not because of my excitement to board the TRAIN OF FAME. But my reason is something that can only be understood by one who has stayed on this path of quit and joined with his or her fellow addicts to grind this addiction into the ground. It is the BROTHERHOOD, ACCOUNTABILITY and SUCCESS that we find here.
I can never thank everyone enough for the love and fellowship that I feel here. I'm not going to try to mention each of you just know that I am profoundly grateful to everyone. I will continue to be on your ass if I see you slack off and I will be there to help pull you through a funk. Like wise I will expect nothing less from you, if I am less than enthusiastic call me out on it, if you catch me licking my wounds or feeling sorry for myself point out my errors, if I am slow at posting roll I expect to have a text checking up on me.
I feel just like a little kid. I'm not going to sleep tonight, rather I'm waiting until 2.27 am (exactly 100 days since my 1st post) and post roll for the 100th time with July Freedom Lovin' Junkies (BOQ)
What is this wet salty discharge coming from my eyes? I don't cry. I don't eat quiche but I certainly can love. I loved everything about this post. WT the first time I noticed you on the site is when you told Bruce to lay off another quitter. I was relatively new but my new addiction was coming to KTC to laugh. I loved the chatter and the nic rages were so fun.
When you and Bruce went at it, I knew I liked you both. You both had passion about people and quitting. So as I sit here on your Christmas eve, I can only smile and look back at how awesome this journey has been. I loved fighting the nic bitch side by side with you. I too expect that it will continue.
The rest of my thoughts I'll PM you.
Well done sir, proud to be quit with you DICK FACE! 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
I told Shelly and the kids about that. They just laughed. Later, we were loading the boat for lake powell. I was barking orders. My daughter looked at me and said, "Calm down dick face!" Everyone rolled....even I had to look away and laugh.
That last statement cracks me up mt! And wt i will be the first to call you out in posting roll. Its 12:47am where you are and you haven't done it yet! :D
-
MThomas may I borrow a line from you:Â Christmas Eve day 99
As I set here and contemplate the past I am profoundly grateful to KTC for providing this forum to QUIT Dip!Â
I have been thinking about one of my many caves over the years. The particular cave that I was thinking about occurred in the spring of 1984. I had been dealing with some pretty stressful times at home and at work. I had been nicotine free for about 3 1/2 yrs. I remember buying a can of copensnuff and fondling the can. I don't think that I even opened the can the 1st day. I knew that I shouldn't do it. But the cave had been planned. I eventually convinced myself that I could be a casual dipper only using when I had really stressful days. WRONG! Soon I was using more and more often that I ever had. My next personal rationalization was that I would stop when things got easier. And on and on and on! This was followed by numerous half assed attempts to stop, most of them because my wife caught me red handed.Â
99 days ago as I flushed that stash I told you that I cried. Since that day I have had other experiences that have brought tears to my eyes. One was a couple weeks ago when Grizz Dipper 18 text me and told me he had thrown his stash out. Others have been either helping a fellow quitter or being helped by one of you myself.Â
Tonight I set at this keyboard and the tears are so very close to the surface, not because I miss the old companion, not because I am overwhelmed with a satisfaction of accomplishment, not because of my excitement to board the TRAIN OF FAME. But my reason is something that can only be understood by one who has stayed on this path of quit and joined with his or her fellow addicts to grind this addiction into the ground. It is the BROTHERHOOD, ACCOUNTABILITY and SUCCESS that we find here.
I can never thank everyone enough for the love and fellowship that I feel here. I'm not going to try to mention each of you just know that I am profoundly grateful to everyone. I will continue to be on your ass if I see you slack off and I will be there to help pull you through a funk. Like wise I will expect nothing less from you, if I am less than enthusiastic call me out on it, if you catch me licking my wounds or feeling sorry for myself point out my errors, if I am slow at posting roll I expect to have a text checking up on me.
I feel just like a little kid. I'm not going to sleep tonight, rather I'm waiting until 2.27 am (exactly 100 days since my 1st post) and post roll for the 100th time with July Freedom Lovin' Junkies (BOQ)
What is this wet salty discharge coming from my eyes? I don't cry. I don't eat quiche but I certainly can love. I loved everything about this post. WT the first time I noticed you on the site is when you told Bruce to lay off another quitter. I was relatively new but my new addiction was coming to KTC to laugh. I loved the chatter and the nic rages were so fun.
When you and Bruce went at it, I knew I liked you both. You both had passion about people and quitting. So as I sit here on your Christmas eve, I can only smile and look back at how awesome this journey has been. I loved fighting the nic bitch side by side with you. I too expect that it will continue.
The rest of my thoughts I'll PM you.
Well done sir, proud to be quit with you DICK FACE! 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
I told Shelly and the kids about that. They just laughed. Later, we were loading the boat for lake powell. I was barking orders. My daughter looked at me and said, "Calm down dick face!" Everyone rolled....even I had to look away and laugh.
That last statement cracks me up mt! And wt i will be the first to call you out in posting roll. Its 12:47am where you are and you haven't done it yet! :D
I waited till 2:27 am to post that was the time of my first post on April, 1
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Congrats on your 100 WT! nicely done!
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Congrats on the first 100 days!
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Congrats on the first 100 days!
congrats as well
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Congrats brother!!
Keep the badassness going and commit to the second floor brother!
I am proud honored to be quit with you today!
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Congrats brother!!
Keep the badassness going and commit to the second floor brother!
I am proud honored to be quit with you today!
x2
Congrats, very proud bro
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Congrats brother!!
Keep the badassness going and commit to the second floor brother!
I am proud honored to be quit with you today!
x2
Congrats, very proud bro
x3. You are a badasz quitter WT!
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Congrats brother!!
Keep the badassness going and commit to the second floor brother!
I am proud honored to be quit with you today!
x2
Congrats, very proud bro
x3. You are a badasz quitter WT!
Very proud of you man.
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Wade,
You are a primo quitter. You spend as much time working on everyone else's quit as you do your own. Your work in the intro section at 2am is much appreciated by those looking for help at that late hour. The hardcore quit that you have going on is an inspiration to me, July, and anyone else that you reach out to. I can honestly say that this site is MUCH, MUCH better off having you here.
Thanks for being a rock bro. Congrats, and I look forward to seeing you at 200 and 300 and 1,000.
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Congrats brother!!
Keep the badassness going and commit to the second floor brother!
I am proud honored to be quit with you today!
x2
Congrats, very proud bro
x3. You are a badasz quitter WT!
Very proud of you man.
X 5 Very proud to be quit with you man! Nice job!
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Congrats brother!!
Keep the badassness going and commit to the second floor brother!
I am proud honored to be quit with you today!
x2
Congrats, very proud bro
x3. You are a badasz quitter WT!
Very proud of you man.
X 5 Very proud to be quit with you man! Nice job!
You shame me for even thinking about a cave. Well done, sir. Please keep helping me.
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Congrats brother!!
Keep the badassness going and commit to the second floor brother!
I am proud honored to be quit with you today!
x2
Congrats, very proud bro
x3. You are a badasz quitter WT!
Very proud of you man.
X 5 Very proud to be quit with you man! Nice job!
You shame me for even thinking about a cave. Well done, sir. Please keep helping me.
You sir, are an inspiration. Proud of you.
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You make me proud WT, can't wait to reach that goal as well!
Helms
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everyone thank you my Internet is not working I'll try to get back to everyone as soon as its working again
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Man.. I am proud to be quit with you! I don't know anybody that I see making more posts than you.. I do not know anybody that has helped my more.. Thanks! Gooch
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I have been thinking about one of my many caves over the years. The particular cave that I was thinking about occurred in the spring of 1984. I had been dealing with some pretty stressful times at home and at work. I had been nicotine free for about 3 1/2 yrs. I remember buying a can of copensnuff and fondling the can.... I still remember a lot of the thoughts that went through my head... I don't think that I even opened the can the 1st day.. ..... I knew that I shouldn't do it! But the cave had been planned. The inevitable happened, I eventually convinced myself that I could be a casual dipper only using when I had really stressful days. WRONG! That first dip and I was flat on my stomach being banged in the ass by the nic bitch nonstop. Soon I was using more and more often that I ever had. My next personal rationalization was that I would stop when things got easier. And on and on and on! This was followed by numerous half-assed attempts to stop, most of them because my wife caught me red handed.
Tonight I set at this keyboard and the emotions are so very close to the surface, not because I miss the old companion, not because I am overwhelmed with a satisfaction of accomplishment, but my reason is something that can only be understood by one who has stayed on this path of quit and joined with his or her fellow addicts to grind this addiction into the ground and "are" drinking deeply of the kool aid. It is the BROTHERHOOD, ACCOUNTABILITY and SUCCESS that we find here. Damn I love all of you for helping me and allowing me to help you! May we always remember where we have come from and what we have accomplished. May we also remember that we didn't do it alone! And most important of all "WE DO IT ONE DAY AT A TIME".
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I have been thinking about one of my many caves over the years. The particular cave that I was thinking about occurred in the spring of 1984. I had been dealing with some pretty stressful times at home and at work. I had been nicotine free for about 3 1/2 yrs. I remember buying a can of copensnuff and fondling the can.... I still remember a lot of the thoughts that went through my head... I don't think that I even opened the can the 1st day.. ..... I knew that I shouldn't do it! But the cave had been planned. The inevitable happened, I eventually convinced myself that I could be a casual dipper only using when I had really stressful days. WRONG! That first dip and I was flat on my stomach being banged in the ass by the nic bitch nonstop. Soon I was using more and more often that I ever had. My next personal rationalization was that I would stop when things got easier. And on and on and on! This was followed by numerous half-assed attempts to stop, most of them because my wife caught me red handed.Â
Tonight I set at this keyboard and the emotions are so very close to the surface, not because I miss the old companion, not because I am overwhelmed with a satisfaction of accomplishment, but my reason is something that can only be understood by one who has stayed on this path of quit and joined with his or her fellow addicts to grind this addiction into the ground and "are" drinking deeply of the kool aid. It is the BROTHERHOOD, ACCOUNTABILITY and SUCCESS that we find here. Damn I love all of you for helping me and allowing me to help you! May we always remember where we have come from and what we have accomplished. May we also remember that we didn't do it alone! And most important of all "WE DO IT ONE DAY AT A TIME".
Hats off to WT... He may just be the best quitter on KTC!! Thanks Man.. Gooch
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This is for my fellow July Freedom lovin' Junkies (The Brotherhood of Quit)
I posted there but I wanted to make sure my challenge didn't get lost.
Quitters I've been struggling with a question the past few days. As most of you know I've been an addict for nearly 40 years and had many attempts to quit. Some of my attempts have lasted days, weeks and one even lasted 3 1/2 years. So the question: What is different this time? And I can say with true conviction it is different, I feel it, I know it and I am totally convinced that it is forever. That doesn't mean that I don't have to be here everyday and make that promise and commitment, I DO! As July has passed the 1/2 way point in the month and many of us have reached the Hall my excitement for each one of us as our day approaches intensifies. It doesn't matter if it is Kubrick's 117 or Liberdaves 86 The excitement is the same we are brothers!
Back to my question and why I'm asking it of myself. I believe that it has been spurred on by some caves! I have started questioning my commitment! I think the bitch has been trying all the windows and doors trying to find a opening into my quit. I had all of my canned answers as to why I quit but what was the real reason and what makes it different from all the other feeble attempts?
I have concluded that there isn't just one answer but several:
1. I was truly ready to quit, I wanted it, I had actually wanted it for about 6 months. But I hadn't tried because I couldn't live with another failed attempt, I already felt like a total failure at everything.
2. I didn't do it for my wife, even though I felt a need to be there for her through her daily health challenges. But I brought her into it with me after the ceremonial flushing of the dip and my morning process were over.
3. Probably the most important reason it is successful for me is that I brought my Savior into the process with me, (He brought me into the process by leading me to KTC) I have got to say that many of the previous times I had prayed for help but I wanted Him to do the work while I stood back and watched. I doesn't work that way!
4. KTC, it works! BROTHERHOOD ACCOUNTABILITY = SUCCESS. Reaching the 100 day mark is true accomplishment in our addicted lives, but it isn't a reason to slack off. If anything it is more vital that we stick close together.
I don't know if I will ever reach the point of feeling safe to go without posting roll. For now that doesn't matter, I need it. I'm not able to live a nicotine free life without having an army behind me to help me with the daily battles! I know that is true for most if not all of us and challenge you to join with me in committing to 200 days! Men we have come too far to let our guard down, The war has just begun, lets join together to continue fighting the daily battles that present themselves.
Many of you have added your names to the top of the page committing to the 200 days lets get everyone there!
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Fellow quitters last night I called for a ban on some trolls on line. I've reconsidered and decided the best option is to not give them recognition let them disappear on on page 2 and beyond. Join me in bumping true quitters up ahead of the trolls!
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Fellow quitters last night I called for a ban on some trolls on line. I've reconsidered and decided the best option is to not give them recognition let them disappear on on page 2 and beyond. Join me in bumping true quitters up ahead of the trolls!
sounds good so how do you want to do this some random page bumping???
let me know bro!
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Fellow quitters last night I called for a ban on some trolls on line. I've reconsidered and decided the best option is to not give them recognition let them disappear on on page 2 and beyond. Join me in bumping true quitters up ahead of the trolls!
sounds good so how do you want to do this some random page bumping???
let me know bro!
Just quote to those true quitters that are below the trolls and bump their intro to top of page!! Especially newbies!!!
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I've been thinking about this post lately and decided to revisit it and edit it to my current quit prospective. The original post was on my 69th day that was 50 days ago. Not much has changed!
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend, some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it canÂ’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME. One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 119 days)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time. I'm proud of my 1st 100 days. And I continue to be poud of everyday! I've also got to add I am proud of each quit day each of you post! We are brothers and sisters in this and just like I encourage and support my family in life and feel joy in their successes and pain in their failures, I Feel these same things with you my quit family!
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I've been thinking about this post lately and decided to revisit it and edit it to my current quit prospective. The original post was on my 69th day that was 50 days ago. Not much has changed!
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend, some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it canÂ’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME. One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 119 days)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time. I'm proud of my 1st 100 days. And I continue to be poud of everyday! I've also got to add I am proud of each quit day each of you post! We are brothers and sisters in this and just like I encourage and support my family in life and feel joy in their successes and pain in their failures, I Feel these same things with you my quit family!
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME. One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 119 days)
Well Put WT! This was Hall of Fame worthy man! Thanks for everything! Gooch
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I've been thinking about this post lately and decided to revisit it and edit it to my current quit prospective. The original post was on my 69th day that was 50 days ago. Not much has changed!
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.Â
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend, some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (I’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (I’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (I’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME. One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 119 days)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time. I'm proud of my 1st 100 days. And I continue to be poud of everyday! I've also got to add I am proud of each quit day each of you post! We are brothers and sisters in this and just like I encourage and support my family in life and feel joy in their successes and pain in their failures, I Feel these same things with you my quit family!
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME.  One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 119 days)
Well Put WT! This was Hall of Fame worthy man! Thanks for everything! Gooch
Say it brother. Right on the money
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Profile and Personality of a Quitter
Because of the fact that we addicts come from every walk of life, age, race, religion and sex it would be impossible to give a set profile or personality trait of a quitter. We are each one individuals and unique just as we are in every other aspect of life. That means that the way we react to quitting is also unique to us. I may rage at something you withdraw from. I may have a strong crave to a trigger that you wouldnÂ’t be bothered by, and so on. There are only 2 things that I can think of that all of us have in common. They are we are all addicted to nicotine and we all have a desire to quit it and never go back. Even this second thing we have in common varies greatly, that is evident by the energy that is put into the quit. We see individuals that fail and cave after only a day or two, others cave after years. We cannot change anything about being addicts but we can change the degree that we desire to quit. Most retreads that return have an increased desire, they have reevaluated their quit. Some of us have been addicted longer and have an increased understanding of how enslaved we have been and also realize that we arenÂ’t as invincible as we thought we were in our younger years. It is my opinion that the worse the pain of withdrawal (the suck) is the more you will want to remain quit. Time has a tendency to make us forget things, that goes for the suck. We must find ways to keep it fresh in our minds so if we start thinking that we could sneak just one dip, the next thing that we should think about is that first 2 weeks of SUCK!!!
Adjustment to my Quit Plan
The real purpose of this update to my intro is to make an explanation to my current status. I have several personal issues that are bearing down on me and need to be placed high on my priority list. I have realized that one of my personality traits is that I really hate conflict and that when I am among so many different individuals I have a tendency to do one of two things either I withdraw from controversy or I over-react and say and do things I regret later. When I react in either of these ways my quit is weakened. Because of this IÂ’ve come to the conclusion that I needed to make some adjustments to my Quit Plan. 1. I will post my quit promise as early as possible every day in my July 2012 group (IÂ’m committed to 100 % for another 75 days) 2. My support to other months is still there even if I donÂ’t post it. (I will either text or pm a word of support every day to individuals that I feel support from and have become close quit friends.) 3. I will continue to send a pm welcome to each newbie and offer my support and an offer to share #Â’s. 4. I will still occasionally make comments on serious matters of discussion in the various forums but will avoid posting for the purpose of stirring the pot. (If the drama is to great I will avoid the subject all together it harms quits more than it helps sometimes) 5. I will concentrate on strengthening the relationship that I have with my fellow July brothers, and reach out to them to see that we all stay quit each day. 6. I have worked hard on gaining the trust of my wife over the past 125 days and I am going to really be working on the already great relationship that we have to make it more honest and open. I have lied to and deceived her for far too long and she deserves to have more of my attention.
I realize that from time to time we need to make changes and I am smart enough to recognize if I need to make more adjustments to this plan. I really can never express my appreciation to so many indidviduals here enough.
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Profile and Personality of a Quitter
Because of the fact that we addicts come from every walk of life, age, race, religion and sex it would be impossible to give a set profile or personality trait of a quitter. We are each one individuals and unique just as we are in every other aspect of life. That means that the way we react to quitting is also unique to us. I may rage at something you withdraw from. I may have a strong crave to a trigger that you wouldnÂ’t be bothered by, and so on. There are only 2 things that I can think of that all of us have in common. They are we are all addicted to nicotine and we all have a desire to quit it and never go back. Even this second thing we have in common varies greatly, that is evident by the energy that is put into the quit. We see individuals that fail and cave after only a day or two, others cave after years. We cannot change anything about being addicts but we can change the degree that we desire to quit. Most retreads that return have an increased desire, they have reevaluated their quit. Some of us have been addicted longer and have an increased understanding of how enslaved we have been and also realize that we arenÂ’t as invincible as we thought we were in our younger years. It is my opinion that the worse the pain of withdrawal (the suck) is the more you will want to remain quit. Time has a tendency to make us forget things, that goes for the suck. We must find ways to keep it fresh in our minds so if we start thinking that we could sneak just one dip, the next thing that we should think about is that first 2 weeks of SUCK!!!
Adjustment to my Quit Plan
The real purpose of this update to my intro is to make an explanation to my current status. I have several personal issues that are bearing down on me and need to be placed high on my priority list. I have realized that one of my personality traits is that I really hate conflict and that when I am among so many different individuals I have a tendency to do one of two things either I withdraw from controversy or I over-react and say and do things I regret later. When I react in either of these ways my quit is weakened. Because of this IÂ’ve come to the conclusion that I needed to make some adjustments to my Quit Plan. 1. I will post my quit promise as early as possible every day in my July 2012 group (IÂ’m committed to 100 % for another 75 days) 2. My support to other months is still there even if I donÂ’t post it. (I will either text or pm a word of support every day to individuals that I feel support from and have become close quit friends.) 3. I will continue to send a pm welcome to each newbie and offer my support and an offer to share #Â’s. 4. I will still occasionally make comments on serious matters of discussion in the various forums but will avoid posting for the purpose of stirring the pot. (If the drama is to great I will avoid the subject all together it harms quits more than it helps sometimes) 5. I will concentrate on strengthening the relationship that I have with my fellow July brothers, and reach out to them to see that we all stay quit each day. 6. I have worked hard on gaining the trust of my wife over the past 125 days and I am going to really be working on the already great relationship that we have to make it more honest and open. I have lied to and deceived her for far too long and she deserves to have more of my attention.
I realize that from time to time we need to make changes and I am smart enough to recognize if I need to make more adjustments to this plan. I really can never express my appreciation to so many indidviduals here enough.
You are one badass SOB! Am proud to know you, and even prouder to be able to call you a terrific friend!!! 'Cheers'
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Profile and Personality of a Quitter
Because of the fact that we addicts come from every walk of life, age, race, religion and sex it would be impossible to give a set profile or personality trait of a quitter. We are each one individuals and unique just as we are in every other aspect of life. That means that the way we react to quitting is also unique to us. I may rage at something you withdraw from. I may have a strong crave to a trigger that you wouldn’t be bothered by, and so on. There are only 2 things that I can think of that all of us have in common. They are we are all addicted to nicotine and we all have a desire to quit it and never go back. Even this second thing we have in common varies greatly, that is evident by the energy that is put into the quit. We see individuals that fail and cave after only a day or two, others cave after years. We cannot change anything about being addicts but we can change the degree that we desire to quit. Most retreads that return have an increased desire, they have reevaluated their quit. Some of us have been addicted longer and have an increased understanding of how enslaved we have been and also realize that we aren’t as invincible as we thought we were in our younger years. It is my opinion that the worse the pain of withdrawal (the suck) is the more you will want to remain quit. Time has a tendency to make us forget things, that goes for the suck. We must find ways to keep it fresh in our minds so if we start thinking that we could sneak just one dip, the next thing that we should think about is that first 2 weeks of SUCK!!!
Adjustment to my Quit Plan
The real purpose of this update to my intro is to make an explanation to my current status. I have several personal issues that are bearing down on me and need to be placed high on my priority list. I have realized that one of my personality traits is that I really hate conflict and that when I am among so many different individuals I have a tendency to do one of two things either I withdraw from controversy or I over-react and say and do things I regret later. When I react in either of these ways my quit is weakened. Because of this I’ve come to the conclusion that I needed to make some adjustments to my Quit Plan. 1. I will post my quit promise as early as possible every day in my July 2012 group (I’m committed to 100 % for another 75 days) 2. My support to other months is still there even if I don’t post it. (I will either text or pm a word of support every day to individuals that I feel support from and have become close quit friends.) 3. I will continue to send a pm welcome to each newbie and offer my support and an offer to share #’s. 4. I will still occasionally make comments on serious matters of discussion in the various forums but will avoid posting for the purpose of stirring the pot. (If the drama is to great I will avoid the subject all together it harms quits more than it helps sometimes) 5. I will concentrate on strengthening the relationship that I have with my fellow July brothers, and reach out to them to see that we all stay quit each day. 6. I have worked hard on gaining the trust of my wife over the past 125 days and I am going to really be working on the already great relationship that we have to make it more honest and open. I have lied to and deceived her for far too long and she deserves to have more of my attention.
I realize that from time to time we need to make changes and I am smart enough to recognize if I need to make more adjustments to this plan. I really can never express my appreciation to so many indidviduals here enough.
You are one badass SOB! Am proud to know you, and even prouder to be able to call you a terrific friend!!! 'Cheers'
To be able to reflect, identify, and adjust is what makes the best of the best. You sir, right here, have shown you have that innate ability to do just that.
Proud as hell to be QLAFM with you today and every day that follows.
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Profile and Personality of a Quitter
Because of the fact that we addicts come from every walk of life, age, race, religion and sex it would be impossible to give a set profile or personality trait of a quitter. We are each one individuals and unique just as we are in every other aspect of life. That means that the way we react to quitting is also unique to us. I may rage at something you withdraw from. I may have a strong crave to a trigger that you wouldnÂ’t be bothered by, and so on. There are only 2 things that I can think of that all of us have in common. They are we are all addicted to nicotine and we all have a desire to quit it and never go back. Even this second thing we have in common varies greatly, that is evident by the energy that is put into the quit. We see individuals that fail and cave after only a day or two, others cave after years. We cannot change anything about being addicts but we can change the degree that we desire to quit. Most retreads that return have an increased desire, they have reevaluated their quit. Some of us have been addicted longer and have an increased understanding of how enslaved we have been and also realize that we arenÂ’t as invincible as we thought we were in our younger years. It is my opinion that the worse the pain of withdrawal (the suck) is the more you will want to remain quit. Time has a tendency to make us forget things, that goes for the suck. We must find ways to keep it fresh in our minds so if we start thinking that we could sneak just one dip, the next thing that we should think about is that first 2 weeks of SUCK!!!
Adjustment to my Quit Plan
The real purpose of this update to my intro is to make an explanation to my current status. I have several personal issues that are bearing down on me and need to be placed high on my priority list. I have realized that one of my personality traits is that I really hate conflict and that when I am among so many different individuals I have a tendency to do one of two things either I withdraw from controversy or I over-react and say and do things I regret later. When I react in either of these ways my quit is weakened. Because of this IÂ’ve come to the conclusion that I needed to make some adjustments to my Quit Plan. 1. I will post my quit promise as early as possible every day in my July 2012 group (IÂ’m committed to 100 % for another 75 days) 2. My support to other months is still there even if I donÂ’t post it. (I will either text or pm a word of support every day to individuals that I feel support from and have become close quit friends.) 3. I will continue to send a pm welcome to each newbie and offer my support and an offer to share #Â’s. 4. I will still occasionally make comments on serious matters of discussion in the various forums but will avoid posting for the purpose of stirring the pot. (If the drama is to great I will avoid the subject all together it harms quits more than it helps sometimes) 5. I will concentrate on strengthening the relationship that I have with my fellow July brothers, and reach out to them to see that we all stay quit each day. 6. I have worked hard on gaining the trust of my wife over the past 125 days and I am going to really be working on the already great relationship that we have to make it more honest and open. I have lied to and deceived her for far too long and she deserves to have more of my attention.
I realize that from time to time we need to make changes and I am smart enough to recognize if I need to make more adjustments to this plan. I really can never express my appreciation to so many indidviduals here enough.
Excellent post! Proud to be quit with you!
STAY QUIT
Greg
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Friends it has been almost 2 weeks since I changed my quit plan. I have been in a real healing process and adjustment to myself. Quitting is a much deeper process than just quiting nicotine. I have known for a long time how addicted I was to nicotine and how my addiction effected my life in so many ways.
In reality
I didn't have a clue! Every aspect of my life was controlled by my addiction. I have been a slave for nearly 40 yrs.
I avoided making friends or being around people because I would have to share time with them, that could be devoted to nicotine. So I find I really don't have friends.
I avoided my church family because my religion (LDS) doesn't tolerate alcohol or tobacco use. And my embarrassment of getting caught or to admit I wasn't living my own beliefs was more than I could face.
I've avoided family in favor of the bitch! And find that I have not developed those lasting relationships with close family members.
And on and on and on!!! You can fill the list with your own life experience.
Well the point of my post is to tell everyone how much I appreciate your support and that I'm again making adjustments to my quit to include offering more support to you like I did in the past. I realize that I need to reach out and offer help if I expect you to be there for me. I will try to avoid controversial comments that have no real positive effect on quitting. I will continue to point out areas where we do or say stupid things that should be obvious. I expect your support to continue only as I support you.
-
Friends it has been almost 2 weeks since I changed my quit plan. I have been in a real healing process and adjustment to myself. Quitting is a much deeper process than just quiting nicotine. I have known for a long time how addicted I was to nicotine and how my addiction effected my life in so many ways.
In reality
I didn't have a clue! Every aspect of my life was controlled by my addiction. I have been a slave for nearly 40 yrs.
I avoided making friends or being around people because I would have to share time with them, that could be devoted to nicotine. So I find I really don't have friends.
I avoided my church family because my religion (LDS) doesn't tolerate alcohol or tobacco use. And my embarrassment of getting caught or to admit I wasn't living my own beliefs was more than I could face.
I've avoided family in favor of the bitch! And find that I have not developed those lasting relationships with close family members.
And on and on and on!!! You can fill the list with your own life experience.
Well the point of my post is to tell everyone how much I appreciate your support and that I'm again making adjustments to my quit to include offering more support to you like I did in the past. I realize that I need to reach out and offer help if I expect you to be there for me. I will try to avoid controversial comments that have no real positive effect on quitting. I will continue to point out areas where we do or say stupid things that should be obvious. I expect your support to continue only as I support you.
'Kiss'
-
Friends it has been almost 2 weeks since I changed my quit plan. I have been in a real healing process and adjustment to myself. Quitting is a much deeper process than just quiting nicotine. I have known for a long time how addicted I was to nicotine and how my addiction effected my life in so many ways.
In reality
I didn't have a clue! Every aspect of my life was controlled by my addiction. I have been a slave for nearly 40 yrs.
I avoided making friends or being around people because I would have to share time with them, that could be devoted to nicotine. So I find I really don't have friends.
I avoided my church family because my religion (LDS) doesn't tolerate alcohol or tobacco use. And my embarrassment of getting caught or to admit I wasn't living my own beliefs was more than I could face.
I've avoided family in favor of the bitch! And find that I have not developed those lasting relationships with close family members.
And on and on and on!!! You can fill the list with your own life experience.
Well the point of my post is to tell everyone how much I appreciate your support and that I'm again making adjustments to my quit to include offering more support to you like I did in the past. I realize that I need to reach out and offer help if I expect you to be there for me. I will try to avoid controversial comments that have no real positive effect on quitting. I will continue to point out areas where we do or say stupid things that should be obvious. I expect your support to continue only as I support you.
You da man WT!!! You helped me out a TON when I was really struggling. Anytime u need me, I'm here for you bro! I enjoy beating down the nic bitch with you daily!!!!
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Predator and Prey
A predator is one that preys on the weak, vulnerable or unexpecting. Today I was observing coyotes searching for mice. Other times I've seen wolves surrounding elk or deer. What does this have to do with DIP?
Big tabacco and the nic bitch are PREDATORS! Most of us were prey captured in a weak and vulnerable time in our lives we were caught off guard and had no idea what the final outcome of that first dip would be.
Once captured our predator toyed with us. We were lead to believe we were safe, our lives weren't in danger and that we could get up and walk away at anytime. Then the day came we tried! The predator allowed us to get a short distance away and then jerked us back into her grip and control! (who has watched a cat play with a mouse) that is how I feel my relationship with the predatory nic bitch has been.
Experiences I've had lately have made me realize eventhough I'm quit and quite a ways from the evil bitch I am not out of her reach! I see her lurking and watching me. I know where she is and where I am. My goal is to keep extending the distance between us until I have her far enough away that I feel somewhat safe. In the meantime I will keep my eye on the cover and protection I've been building. (contacts, daily promises and the confidence I feel in winning daily battles)
I look forward to the day that our roles reverse and I'm no longer the prey but the predator and I'm stronger than nicotine! I see we are circling each other and neither knows who is the stronger! Alone I'm still the prey but with you we can join forces and out wit and overcome our addiction to nicotine. There is no reason any of us 1 day or 2000 days should have to see if we are the predator yet we have our own pack that has the strength in numbers! Just as a group of animals fighting their prey if one goes it on his own or let's his guard down the predator will see the weakness and be ready to pounce!
If we put our backs together and look out for each other this WAR is won! Our individual victories are shared and we become a vicious nicotine predator.
-
Predator and Prey
A predator is one that preys on the weak, vulnerable or unexpecting. Today I was observing coyotes searching for mice. Other times I've seen wolves surrounding elk or deer. What does this have to do with DIP?
Big tabacco and the nic bitch are PREDATORS! Most of us were prey captured in a weak and vulnerable time in our lives we were caught off guard and had no idea what the final outcome of that first dip would be.
Once captured our predator toyed with us. We were lead to believe we were safe, our lives weren't in danger and that we could get up and walk away at anytime. Then the day came we tried! The predator allowed us to get a short distance away and then jerked us back into her grip and control! (who has watched a cat play with a mouse) that is how I feel my relationship with the predatory nic bitch has been.
Experiences I've had lately have made me realize eventhough I'm quit and quite a ways from the evil bitch I am not out of her reach! I see her lurking and watching me. I know where she is and where I am. My goal is to keep extending the distance between us until I have her far enough away that I feel somewhat safe. In the meantime I will keep my eye on the cover and protection I've been building. (contacts, daily promises and the confidence I feel in winning daily battles)
I look forward to the day that our roles reverse and I'm no longer the prey but the predator and I'm stronger than nicotine! I see we are circling each other and neither knows who is the stronger! Alone I'm still the prey but with you we can join forces and out wit and overcome our addiction to nicotine. There is no reason any of us 1 day or 2000 days should have to see if we are the predator yet we have our own pack that has the strength in numbers! Just as a group of animals fighting their prey if one goes it on his own or let's his guard down the predator will see the weakness and be ready to pounce!
If we put our backs together and look out for each other this WAR is won! Our individual victories are shared and we become a vicious nicotine predator.
Right on. Yes. That's the fucking enemy man. Fight. Plan. Protect.
I quit with you today bro.
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WHY QUIT.
My motivation to quit has been completely unrelated to the fear of cancer. I’ve lived a life of very deep depression and used the chew as a way to cope with life, I thought. Not so: my addiction has proved to do just the opposite it has made me even more depressed because I always tried to hide it from my family and friends. Yes I’ve been a ninja dipper for almost 40 yrs. Over the past 3 weeks I have found that I am finally free of my secret life and open to talk about my addiction with you and my family. My depression is leaving me each day a little at a time as I quit each day.
I feel a profound obligation to do anything that I can to help younger addicts quit while they are still young. I don’t want to see anyone be as stupid as I have been! I don’t care what your motivation is if you have quit stay quit with me!! If you are reading this and haven’t quit, throw that shit away and run to post your quit NOW. There are always reasons to wait until tomorrow, but tomorrow never comes it just move on to the next tomorrow. I know this better than anyone I've had over 13,000 tomorrows. But now I've had 22 todays, I dont want to look back or ahead all that is important to me right now is TODAY and I QUIT AGAIN!!!!
WT thanks for sharing your story with us, it hits really close to home for me and helped me with my quit.
Thanks a million and we stand quit right beside you!
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I have revised this introduction to myself today my 140th day of freedom. I will not tell you that it has been easy, It hasnÂ’t. I wonÂ’t tell you that I have struggled everyday, I havenÂ’t somedays have been easy others real bitches. I will tell you that the friendships that I have made here online will last a life time. The support that I have had and felt here is irreplaceable. Reaching out a helping hand to other addicts is also a very rewarding experience and takes oneÂ’s mind off their own struggle.
I'm Wade I'm 55 yrs. old, been married for 32 yrs., have 1 adult daughter and 2 grandkids, I farm in Idaho, have been addicted to Nicotine for almost 40 yrs. I can't count the times that I have attempted to quit. My Nicotine use was always ninja style, my wife caught me but no one else knew that I dipped. My life has been a miserable life of seclusion because I couldn't dip around others. Why? I grew up and have always been an active Mormon and my religion strictly prohibits the use of tobacco and alcohol. I just withdrew into my own little world with the whore. I honestly had given up hope of ever quitting; I hated what I had become so bad that I decided to give it one last shot. If it didn't happen I was prepared to just end everything (check out of life). I have dealt with depression all of my adult life and I always thought that the nicotine helped me deal with that. Not so it only contributed to the depression. After 140 days I have to say that my depression and anxiety have been very much under control. I had worked up a grand plan to quit, had put the plan into action and had a quit date planned. When I was searching for any other help that might make my quit successful I stumbled on to KTC, I joined on Mar. 28 and started reading for 2 nights I never slept, just read. My quit date was April 11 our 32 wedding anniversary. On April 1 at 1:30 am I sat by the toilet and cried like a baby as I dumped 3 full cans of copensnuff down the can. Somehow that night I knew that My QUIT was good it was for me, I hadn't even talked to my wife about trying to quit, she wouldn't have believed me any way. Now she is part of my quit.
Every morning I post my roll and promise everyone here that I will remain nic free, I also hold my lovely wife's hand and promise her that I will not use it that day. Now she asks me what day it is, how I'm feeling and if she can help. Before my tobacco use was taboo, off limits to talk about I didn't want to face the fact that I was an addict.
I have tried to share my story with each newbie as soon as they join and quit so most of you that quit since about April 15 have seen most of this but I have updated it to keep up with the changing times. I will continue to drop this intro into each newbies inbox along with the offer to trade #s with them.
-
I have revised this introduction to myself today my 140th day of freedom. I will not tell you that it has been easy, It hasnÂ’t. I wonÂ’t tell you that I have struggled everyday, I havenÂ’t somedays have been easy others real bitches. I will tell you that the friendships that I have made here online will last a life time. The support that I have had and felt here is irreplaceable. Reaching out a helping hand to other addicts is also a very rewarding experience and takes oneÂ’s mind off their own struggle.
I'm Wade I'm 55 yrs. old, been married for 32 yrs., have 1 adult daughter and 2 grandkids, I farm in Idaho, have been addicted to Nicotine for almost 40 yrs. I can't count the times that I have attempted to quit. My Nicotine use was always ninja style, my wife caught me but no one else knew that I dipped. My life has been a miserable life of seclusion because I couldn't dip around others. Why? I grew up and have always been an active Mormon and my religion strictly prohibits the use of tobacco and alcohol. I just withdrew into my own little world with the whore. I honestly had given up hope of ever quitting; I hated what I had become so bad that I decided to give it one last shot. If it didn't happen I was prepared to just end everything (check out of life). I have dealt with depression all of my adult life and I always thought that the nicotine helped me deal with that. Not so it only contributed to the depression. After 140 days I have to say that my depression and anxiety have been very much under control. I had worked up a grand plan to quit, had put the plan into action and had a quit date planned. When I was searching for any other help that might make my quit successful I stumbled on to KTC, I joined on Mar. 28 and started reading for 2 nights I never slept, just read. My quit date was April 11 our 32 wedding anniversary. On April 1 at 1:30 am I sat by the toilet and cried like a baby as I dumped 3 full cans of copensnuff down the can. Somehow that night I knew that My QUIT was good it was for me, I hadn't even talked to my wife about trying to quit, she wouldn't have believed me any way. Now she is part of my quit.
Every morning I post my roll and promise everyone here that I will remain nic free, I also hold my lovely wife's hand and promise her that I will not use it that day. Now she asks me what day it is, how I'm feeling and if she can help. Before my tobacco use was taboo, off limits to talk about I didn't want to face the fact that I was an addict.
I have tried to share my story with each newbie as soon as they join and quit so most of you that quit since about April 15 have seen most of this but I have updated it to keep up with the changing times. I will continue to drop this intro into each newbies inbox along with the offer to trade #s with them.
Good stuff WT..proud to be quit with you. How many acres do you own/farm?
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I have revised this introduction to myself today my 140th day of freedom. I will not tell you that it has been easy, It hasnÂ’t. I wonÂ’t tell you that I have struggled everyday, I havenÂ’t somedays have been easy others real bitches. I will tell you that the friendships that I have made here online will last a life time. The support that I have had and felt here is irreplaceable. Reaching out a helping hand to other addicts is also a very rewarding experience and takes oneÂ’s mind off their own struggle.
I'm Wade I'm 55 yrs. old, been married for 32 yrs., have 1 adult daughter and 2 grandkids, I farm in Idaho, have been addicted to Nicotine for almost 40 yrs. I can't count the times that I have attempted to quit. My Nicotine use was always ninja style, my wife caught me but no one else knew that I dipped. My life has been a miserable life of seclusion because I couldn't dip around others. Why? I grew up and have always been an active Mormon and my religion strictly prohibits the use of tobacco and alcohol. I just withdrew into my own little world with the whore. I honestly had given up hope of ever quitting; I hated what I had become so bad that I decided to give it one last shot. If it didn't happen I was prepared to just end everything (check out of life). I have dealt with depression all of my adult life and I always thought that the nicotine helped me deal with that. Not so it only contributed to the depression. After 140 days I have to say that my depression and anxiety have been very much under control. I had worked up a grand plan to quit, had put the plan into action and had a quit date planned. When I was searching for any other help that might make my quit successful I stumbled on to KTC, I joined on Mar. 28 and started reading for 2 nights I never slept, just read. My quit date was April 11 our 32 wedding anniversary. On April 1 at 1:30 am I sat by the toilet and cried like a baby as I dumped 3 full cans of copensnuff down the can. Somehow that night I knew that My QUIT was good it was for me, I hadn't even talked to my wife about trying to quit, she wouldn't have believed me any way. Now she is part of my quit.
Every morning I post my roll and promise everyone here that I will remain nic free, I also hold my lovely wife's hand and promise her that I will not use it that day. Now she asks me what day it is, how I'm feeling and if she can help. Before my tobacco use was taboo, off limits to talk about I didn't want to face the fact that I was an addict.
I have tried to share my story with each newbie as soon as they join and quit so most of you that quit since about April 15 have seen most of this but I have updated it to keep up with the changing times. I will continue to drop this intro into each newbies inbox along with the offer to trade #s with them.
Keep up the great quit, WT. You've helped me out greatly as I struggled with my quit. I thank you for that. You're a great man and I admire how your quit is constantly evolving. Proud to be quit with you!
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Wade, you continue to inspire me in my quit. Isn't it great to have the support of a loving spouse as you make your way on this journey?
For almost 30 years my wife and I played a little game - I hid my habit as best I could and she pretended not to notice. Now that I'm nic free - the wall that tobacco placed between us has been removed and my quit has brought us closer.
Thanks for sharing and, as always, I quit with you.
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Wade, you continue to inspire me in my quit. Isn't it great to have the support of a loving spouse as you make your way on this journey?
For almost 30 years my wife and I played a little game - I hid my habit as best I could and she pretended not to notice. Now that I'm nic free - the wall that tobacco placed between us has been removed and my quit has brought us closer.
Thanks for sharing and, as always, I quit with you.
Me too. I realized after reading your post and swede....the tobacco wall is down and my relationships...especially with my wife and kids it so much better.
Kicking nicotine to the curb is worth the struggle. It is a struggle some days but most days for me....the nic bitch is a joke. I can't believe the power I gave her. I am dumbfounded that she ruled over me.
Anyone reading this post....if you are struggling. Fight through it and only worry about today. We are all addicts and get it.
However, I promise you, the life tobacco free beats any buzz it offers. Keep your money, Keep your happiness, claim your freedom and never ever go back to nicotine!
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I have revised this introduction to myself today my 140th day of freedom. I will not tell you that it has been easy, It hasnÂ’t. I wonÂ’t tell you that I have struggled everyday, I havenÂ’t somedays have been easy others real bitches. I will tell you that the friendships that I have made here online will last a life time. The support that I have had and felt here is irreplaceable. Reaching out a helping hand to other addicts is also a very rewarding experience and takes oneÂ’s mind off their own struggle.
I'm Wade I'm 55 yrs. old, been married for 32 yrs., have 1 adult daughter and 2 grandkids, I farm in Idaho, have been addicted to Nicotine for almost 40 yrs. I can't count the times that I have attempted to quit. My Nicotine use was always ninja style, my wife caught me but no one else knew that I dipped. My life has been a miserable life of seclusion because I couldn't dip around others. Why? I grew up and have always been an active Mormon and my religion strictly prohibits the use of tobacco and alcohol. I just withdrew into my own little world with the whore. I honestly had given up hope of ever quitting; I hated what I had become so bad that I decided to give it one last shot. If it didn't happen I was prepared to just end everything (check out of life). I have dealt with depression all of my adult life and I always thought that the nicotine helped me deal with that. Not so it only contributed to the depression. After 140 days I have to say that my depression and anxiety have been very much under control. I had worked up a grand plan to quit, had put the plan into action and had a quit date planned. When I was searching for any other help that might make my quit successful I stumbled on to KTC, I joined on Mar. 28 and started reading for 2 nights I never slept, just read. My quit date was April 11 our 32 wedding anniversary. On April 1 at 1:30 am I sat by the toilet and cried like a baby as I dumped 3 full cans of copensnuff down the can. Somehow that night I knew that My QUIT was good it was for me, I hadn't even talked to my wife about trying to quit, she wouldn't have believed me any way. Now she is part of my quit.
Every morning I post my roll and promise everyone here that I will remain nic free, I also hold my lovely wife's hand and promise her that I will not use it that day. Now she asks me what day it is, how I'm feeling and if she can help. Before my tobacco use was taboo, off limits to talk about I didn't want to face the fact that I was an addict.
I have tried to share my story with each newbie as soon as they join and quit so most of you that quit since about April 15 have seen most of this but I have updated it to keep up with the changing times. I will continue to drop this intro into each newbies inbox along with the offer to trade #s with them.
You fugger....you made me tear up....just a bit though 'winker'
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I have revised this introduction to myself today my 140th day of freedom. I will not tell you that it has been easy, It hasn�t. I won�t tell you that I have struggled everyday, I haven�t somedays have been easy others real bitches. I will tell you that the friendships that I have made here online will last a life time. The support that I have had and felt here is irreplaceable. Reaching out a helping hand to other addicts is also a very rewarding experience and takes one�s mind off their own struggle.
I'm Wade I'm 55 yrs. old, been married for 32 yrs., have 1 adult daughter and 2 grandkids, I farm in Idaho, have been addicted to Nicotine for almost 40 yrs. I can't count the times that I have attempted to quit. My Nicotine use was always ninja style, my wife caught me but no one else knew that I dipped. My life has been a miserable life of seclusion because I couldn't dip around others. Why? I grew up and have always been an active Mormon and my religion strictly prohibits the use of tobacco and alcohol. I just withdrew into my own little world with the whore. I honestly had given up hope of ever quitting; I hated what I had become so bad that I decided to give it one last shot. If it didn't happen I was prepared to just end everything (check out of life). I have dealt with depression all of my adult life and I always thought that the nicotine helped me deal with that. Not so it only contributed to the depression. After 140 days I have to say that my depression and anxiety have been very much under control. I had worked up a grand plan to quit, had put the plan into action and had a quit date planned. When I was searching for any other help that might make my quit successful I stumbled on to KTC, I joined on Mar. 28 and started reading for 2 nights I never slept, just read. My quit date was April 11 our 32 wedding anniversary. On April 1 at 1:30 am I sat by the toilet and cried like a baby as I dumped 3 full cans of copensnuff down the can. Somehow that night I knew that My QUIT was good it was for me, I hadn't even talked to my wife about trying to quit, she wouldn't have believed me any way. Now she is part of my quit.
Every morning I post my roll and promise everyone here that I will remain nic free, I also hold my lovely wife's hand and promise her that I will not use it that day. Now she asks me what day it is, how I'm feeling and if she can help. Before my tobacco use was taboo, off limits to talk about I didn't want to face the fact that I was an addict.
I have tried to share my story with each newbie as soon as they join and quit so most of you that quit since about April 15 have seen most of this but I have updated it to keep up with the changing times. I will continue to drop this intro into each newbies inbox along with the offer to trade #s with them.
You fugger....you made me tear up....just a bit though 'winker'
Proud of you WT.
Keep paying it forward - it will keep your quit rock solid. (As I am sure you already know.)
Proud to be quit with you,
Dale
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I have revised this introduction to myself today my 140th day of freedom. I will not tell you that it has been easy, It hasn�t. I won�t tell you that I have struggled everyday, I haven�t somedays have been easy others real bitches. I will tell you that the friendships that I have made here online will last a life time. The support that I have had and felt here is irreplaceable. Reaching out a helping hand to other addicts is also a very rewarding experience and takes one�s mind off their own struggle.Â
I'm Wade I'm 55 yrs. old, been married for 32 yrs., have 1 adult daughter and 2 grandkids, I farm in Idaho, have been addicted to Nicotine for almost 40 yrs. I can't count the times that I have attempted to quit. My Nicotine use was always ninja style, my wife caught me but no one else knew that I dipped. My life has been a miserable life of seclusion because I couldn't dip around others. Why? I grew up and have always been an active Mormon and my religion strictly prohibits the use of tobacco and alcohol. I just withdrew into my own little world with the whore. I honestly had given up hope of ever quitting; I hated what I had become so bad that I decided to give it one last shot. If it didn't happen I was prepared to just end everything (check out of life). I have dealt with depression all of my adult life and I always thought that the nicotine helped me deal with that. Not so it only contributed to the depression. After 140 days I have to say that my depression and anxiety have been very much under control.  I had worked up a grand plan to quit, had put the plan into action and had a quit date planned. When I was searching for any other help that might make my quit successful I stumbled on to KTC, I joined on Mar. 28 and started reading for 2 nights I never slept, just read. My quit date was April 11 our 32 wedding anniversary. On April 1 at 1:30 am I sat by the toilet and cried like a baby as I dumped 3 full cans of copensnuff down the can. Somehow that night I knew that My QUIT was good it was for me, I hadn't even talked to my wife about trying to quit, she wouldn't have believed me any way. Now she is part of my quit.
Every morning I post my roll and promise everyone here that I will remain nic free, I also hold my lovely wife's hand and promise her that I will not use it that day. Now she asks me what day it is, how I'm feeling and if she can help. Before my tobacco use was taboo, off limits to talk about I didn't want to face the fact that I was an addict.
I have tried to share my story with each newbie as soon as they join and quit so most of you that quit since about April 15 have seen most of this but I have updated it to keep up with the changing times. I will continue to drop this intro into each newbies inbox along with the offer to trade #s with them.
You fugger....you made me tear up....just a bit though 'winker'
Proud of you WT.
Keep paying it forward - it will keep your quit rock solid. (As I am sure you already know.)
Proud to be quit with you,
Dale
I am proud to be quit with you man. You were one of the first guys to welcome me to this site and I will never forget it. I post roll every morning because old timers like yourself keep me in check. Keep going strong because you got a lot of quitters behind you as well. Proud to be quit with you WT for another day.
Kstamp
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I have revised this introduction to myself today my 140th day of freedom. I will not tell you that it has been easy, It hasn�t. I won�t tell you that I have struggled everyday, I haven�t somedays have been easy others real bitches. I will tell you that the friendships that I have made here online will last a life time. The support that I have had and felt here is irreplaceable. Reaching out a helping hand to other addicts is also a very rewarding experience and takes one�s mind off their own struggle.Â
I'm Wade I'm 55 yrs. old, been married for 32 yrs., have 1 adult daughter and 2 grandkids, I farm in Idaho, have been addicted to Nicotine for almost 40 yrs. I can't count the times that I have attempted to quit. My Nicotine use was always ninja style, my wife caught me but no one else knew that I dipped. My life has been a miserable life of seclusion because I couldn't dip around others. Why? I grew up and have always been an active Mormon and my religion strictly prohibits the use of tobacco and alcohol. I just withdrew into my own little world with the whore. I honestly had given up hope of ever quitting; I hated what I had become so bad that I decided to give it one last shot. If it didn't happen I was prepared to just end everything (check out of life). I have dealt with depression all of my adult life and I always thought that the nicotine helped me deal with that. Not so it only contributed to the depression. After 140 days I have to say that my depression and anxiety have been very much under control.  I had worked up a grand plan to quit, had put the plan into action and had a quit date planned. When I was searching for any other help that might make my quit successful I stumbled on to KTC, I joined on Mar. 28 and started reading for 2 nights I never slept, just read. My quit date was April 11 our 32 wedding anniversary. On April 1 at 1:30 am I sat by the toilet and cried like a baby as I dumped 3 full cans of copensnuff down the can. Somehow that night I knew that My QUIT was good it was for me, I hadn't even talked to my wife about trying to quit, she wouldn't have believed me any way. Now she is part of my quit.
Every morning I post my roll and promise everyone here that I will remain nic free, I also hold my lovely wife's hand and promise her that I will not use it that day. Now she asks me what day it is, how I'm feeling and if she can help. Before my tobacco use was taboo, off limits to talk about I didn't want to face the fact that I was an addict.
I have tried to share my story with each newbie as soon as they join and quit so most of you that quit since about April 15 have seen most of this but I have updated it to keep up with the changing times. I will continue to drop this intro into each newbies inbox along with the offer to trade #s with them.
You fugger....you made me tear up....just a bit though 'winker'
Proud of you WT.
Keep paying it forward - it will keep your quit rock solid. (As I am sure you already know.)
Proud to be quit with you,
Dale
I am proud to be quit with you man. You were one of the first guys to welcome me to this site and I will never forget it. I post roll every morning because old timers like yourself keep me in check. Keep going strong because you got a lot of quitters behind you as well. Proud to be quit with you WT for another day.
Kstamp
You inspire us all, especially me. thanks for all you do my friend!
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My attitude tonight has taken a turn downhill. I need to vent! We often blame shitty feelings on our quitting nicotine and the reprogramming or withdrawal, sometimes that is true! Many times it's not. Nicotine may be a distant reason for my feelings tonight in that it has been my life for so Long but our personalities are what they are with or without nicotine. If a person is a prick in life they probably are with or without nicotine, if your a loser you probably are with or without and so on! Learning to live without nicotine is one thing but changing who you are is a much more difficult process. Some of who I am, I like. But then there are some core things about me I disdain! Changing the minor character flaws is very possible with effort and time but changing my core character is another thing! Over the past 142 days I've shed a shitload of dirty laundry I've aired much of it very publicly and have overcome much of it. I've witnessed others do the same. It really sucks admitting our weaknesses and secret history! The past few days I discovered for Me writing down my demons or a public admission of things I want to get rid of helps me put them into the past. There are things that that just doesn't work with but having someone close enough to share those feelings with is possibly the only way to rid yourself of them. That is what friendship is about. It's interesting that a group of mostly strangers can develop that kind of relationship but I have felt it! In my day to day life I have friends that I share experiences with but i would never share some of the things I've shared with this group. Some burdens I don't even share with my wife. (right or wrong I don't) So why the downhill slide tonight? I don't know but I hope I can discover what I need to do to improve my attitude! I'm hopeful that my reaching out to others will lead me down the path to my recovery. Again what I'm dealing with isn't nic related and my quit is definitely not in danger I just needed to vent out loud! In reality no one even needs to read this or respond it is my way of talking through my feelings.
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Day 153. Â A good day to report on my quit. Â This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago. Â But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago.Â
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'
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Day 153. Â A good day to report on my quit. Â This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago. Â But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago.Â
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'
Well said WT
'boob' 'boob' 'boob'
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Day 153. Â A good day to report on my quit. Â This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago. Â But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago.Â
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'
Well said WT
'boob' 'boob' 'boob'
Nice job WT! 'clap'
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Day 153. Â A good day to report on my quit. Â This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago. Â But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago.Â
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'
Well said WT
'boob' 'boob' 'boob'
Nice job WT! 'clap'
Good stuff brother!
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Day 153. Â A good day to report on my quit. Â This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago. Â But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago.Â
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'
Well said WT
'boob' 'boob' 'boob'
Nice job WT! 'clap'
Good stuff brother!
yes sir.. freedom at last.. quit with you all day long.....
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Day 153. Â A good day to report on my quit. Â This has been much more difficult than I thought it would be 153 days ago. Â But it has been many times easier than I thought it would be 148 days ago.Â
 I live in the Rocky Mountains less than 30 miles from the continental divide.  I live at the base of a mountain that rises 6000' in elevation in just a couple of miles.  I love the majesty of the mountains.  I liken my quit to them, at times I've soared above Mt. Everest and other times I've sunk to the depths of the Mariana Trench.  When I've been down I've always known I had those that were willing to pull me up.  And when I've been up or even just on level ground I've been able to help some of my fellow quitters out of their hole!  If you are considering a quit but not sure if you can do it, I promise you that you can, if you will take full advantage of this site and drink deep of the quit koolaid.  Does it suck? Your damn right it does! Embrace it! Is it worth it? Damn right it is! Join with us and change your life! Quit being a slave to the shit!  It feels so good to be free.  But remember freedom is far from free! JUST QUIT!!'
Well said WT
'boob' 'boob' 'boob'
Nice job WT! 'clap'
Good stuff brother!
yes sir.. freedom at last.. quit with you all day long.....
Friends, he is spot on. Quitting can change your life. This badass can help. He knows exactly how.
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Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!
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Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!
great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too
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Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.Â
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!
great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too
So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.
Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.
They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)
Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.
Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.
People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.
US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.
If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?
I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.
There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.
Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.
Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.
It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!
To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?
I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?
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Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.Â
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!
great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too
So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.
Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.
They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)
Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.
Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.
People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.
US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.
If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?
I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.
There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.
Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.
Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.
It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!
To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?
I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?
Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!
-
Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.Â
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!
great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too
So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.
Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.
They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)
Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.
Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.
People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.
US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.
If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?
I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.
There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.
Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.
Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.
It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!
To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?
I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?
Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!
Which brings us back to which came first the chicken or the egg? What does it matter when we have both now?
My personal experience is that quitting tobacco was a battle. I felt I needed to own my addiction but I was so angry at what I became under the influence of Tobacco. It was all me and yes the buck stops with me.
However as I was going through owning my addiction and owning my quit, Rgross simply told me that it is good and okay to HATE that industry. Since that time, the burden of quit has been easy and I have enjoyed the fight!
Still undefeated. All I really want to do is pay it forward. Any new quitter needs to know that it is okay to Hate US Tobacco. Especially Christians that are taught to turn the other check or love your enemy. Tobacco is not human. It is a tool of the devil. You can hate evil and that is all that comes from US Tobacco. If they don't want to hate, that is fine too but it is okay to hate this beast.
-
Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.Â
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!
great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too
So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.
Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.
They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)
Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.
Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.
People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.
US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.
If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?
I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.
There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.
Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.
Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.
It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!
To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?
I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?
Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!
Which brings us back to which came first the chicken or the egg? What does it matter when we have both now?
My personal experience is that quitting tobacco was a battle. I felt I needed to own my addiction but I was so angry at what I became under the influence of Tobacco. It was all me and yes the buck stops with me.
However as I was going through owning my addiction and owning my quit, Rgross simply told me that it is good and okay to HATE that industry. Since that time, the burden of quit has been easy and I have enjoyed the fight!
Still undefeated. All I really want to do is pay it forward. Any new quitter needs to know that it is okay to Hate US Tobacco. Especially Christians that are taught to turn the other check or love your enemy. Tobacco is not human. It is a tool of the devil. You can hate evil and that is all that comes from US Tobacco. If they don't want to hate, that is fine too but it is okay to hate this beast.
Nice discussion, think I'll chime in.
The Tobacco industry knowingly sells a product that murders and enslaves people. Destroys relationships and steals your money. They clear their conscious with minimalized, half-ass attempts to warn their customers of the dangers while they laugh and count their profits on the tombstones. They are disgusting. And I was a dumbass for feeding their greed for almost forty years. But now my eyes are open. I can see that nicotine whore for what she really is. Never again. Not once. I hate tobacco with a passion and it is banned from my life...and yours.
-
Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.Â
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!
great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too
So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.
Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.
They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)
Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.
Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.
People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.
US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.
If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?
I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.
There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.
Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.
Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.
It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!
To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?
I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?
Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!
Which brings us back to which came first the chicken or the egg? What does it matter when we have both now?
My personal experience is that quitting tobacco was a battle. I felt I needed to own my addiction but I was so angry at what I became under the influence of Tobacco. It was all me and yes the buck stops with me.
However as I was going through owning my addiction and owning my quit, Rgross simply told me that it is good and okay to HATE that industry. Since that time, the burden of quit has been easy and I have enjoyed the fight!
Still undefeated. All I really want to do is pay it forward. Any new quitter needs to know that it is okay to Hate US Tobacco. Especially Christians that are taught to turn the other check or love your enemy. Tobacco is not human. It is a tool of the devil. You can hate evil and that is all that comes from US Tobacco. If they don't want to hate, that is fine too but it is okay to hate this beast.
Nice discussion, think I'll chime in.
The Tobacco industry knowingly sells a product that murders and enslaves people. Destroys relationships and steals your money. They clear their conscious with minimalized, half-ass attempts to warn their customers of the dangers while they laugh and count their profits on the tombstones. They are disgusting. And I was a dumbass for feeding their greed for almost forty years. But now my eyes are open. I can see that nicotine whore for what she really is. Never again. Not once. I hate tobacco with a passion and it is banned from my life...and yours.
'clap'
That fires me up! We all are quit today and are winners! Take your filthy lucre soaked in your dead and addicted customers blood and tears and live with what you did to line your pockets!
US Tobacco...No more!!!! I see you for what you do. You are not blameless. I will not surrender to my addiction. My money will never become yours again. NEVER.
'Finger'
-
Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.Â
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!
great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too
So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.
Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.
They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)
Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.
Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.
People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.
US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.
If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?
I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.
There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.
Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.
Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.
It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!
To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?
I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?
Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!
Which brings us back to which came first the chicken or the egg? What does it matter when we have both now?
My personal experience is that quitting tobacco was a battle. I felt I needed to own my addiction but I was so angry at what I became under the influence of Tobacco. It was all me and yes the buck stops with me.
However as I was going through owning my addiction and owning my quit, Rgross simply told me that it is good and okay to HATE that industry. Since that time, the burden of quit has been easy and I have enjoyed the fight!
Still undefeated. All I really want to do is pay it forward. Any new quitter needs to know that it is okay to Hate US Tobacco. Especially Christians that are taught to turn the other check or love your enemy. Tobacco is not human. It is a tool of the devil. You can hate evil and that is all that comes from US Tobacco. If they don't want to hate, that is fine too but it is okay to hate this beast.
Nice discussion, think I'll chime in.
The Tobacco industry knowingly sells a product that murders and enslaves people. Destroys relationships and steals your money. They clear their conscious with minimalized, half-ass attempts to warn their customers of the dangers while they laugh and count their profits on the tombstones. They are disgusting. And I was a dumbass for feeding their greed for almost forty years. But now my eyes are open. I can see that nicotine whore for what she really is. Never again. Not once. I hate tobacco with a passion and it is banned from my life...and yours.
'clap'
That fires me up! We all are quit today and are winners Take your filthy lucre soaked in your dead and addicted customers blood and tears and live with what you did to line your pockets!
US Tobacco...No more!!!! I see you for what you do. You are not blameless. I will not surrender to my addiction. My money will never become yours again. NEVER.
'Finger'
I think I get it! I get it! The pied piper had a lot more involvement in my addiction that I ever recognized. Tabacco sucks ass, I hate everything about tabacco and how my addiction stole my life. This discussion has changed my attitude dramatically. I still own my childish decision to cave to peer pressure, and foolish curiosity. I wish I could reach out to every young teen and tell them my story and how fucked up my life has been because of some poison in a can with a shinny lid! I can't reach a lot of kids but I am a scout master and work with young boys at church. They will hear from me the evils of tabacco ever chance I get as will my grandchildren!! There are a lot of evil thing in the world that suduce us and steal little bits of our lives from us if we let them. If we let them! that is the key, we are all here because we have let ourselves to be controlled (enslaved) by this poison! I have no problem hating UST, they are definitely an evil placed out there to lure uneducated, unsuspecting victims into there clutches! I have my ideas about their role in the world, but the only thing that is important is that we never give into them ever again and always take opportunities to educate others!
-
Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.Â
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!
great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too
So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.
Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.
They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)
Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.
Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.
People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.
US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.
If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?
I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.
There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.
Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.
Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.
It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!
To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?
I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?
Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!
Which brings us back to which came first the chicken or the egg? What does it matter when we have both now?
My personal experience is that quitting tobacco was a battle. I felt I needed to own my addiction but I was so angry at what I became under the influence of Tobacco. It was all me and yes the buck stops with me.
However as I was going through owning my addiction and owning my quit, Rgross simply told me that it is good and okay to HATE that industry. Since that time, the burden of quit has been easy and I have enjoyed the fight!
Still undefeated. All I really want to do is pay it forward. Any new quitter needs to know that it is okay to Hate US Tobacco. Especially Christians that are taught to turn the other check or love your enemy. Tobacco is not human. It is a tool of the devil. You can hate evil and that is all that comes from US Tobacco. If they don't want to hate, that is fine too but it is okay to hate this beast.
Nice discussion, think I'll chime in.
The Tobacco industry knowingly sells a product that murders and enslaves people. Destroys relationships and steals your money. They clear their conscious with minimalized, half-ass attempts to warn their customers of the dangers while they laugh and count their profits on the tombstones. They are disgusting. And I was a dumbass for feeding their greed for almost forty years. But now my eyes are open. I can see that nicotine whore for what she really is. Never again. Not once. I hate tobacco with a passion and it is banned from my life...and yours.
'clap'
That fires me up! We all are quit today and are winners Take your filthy lucre soaked in your dead and addicted customers blood and tears and live with what you did to line your pockets!
US Tobacco...No more!!!! I see you for what you do. You are not blameless. I will not surrender to my addiction. My money will never become yours again. NEVER.
'Finger'
I think I get it! I get it! The pied piper had a lot more involvement in my addiction that I ever recognized. Tabacco sucks ass, I hate everything about tabacco and how my addiction stole my life. This discussion has changed my attitude dramatically. I still own my childish decision to cave to peer pressure, and foolish curiosity. I wish I could reach out to every young teen and tell them my story and how fucked up my life has been because of some poison in a can with a shinny lid! I can't reach a lot of kids but I am a scout master and work with young boys at church. They will hear from me the evils of tabacco ever chance I get as will my grandchildren!! There are a lot of evil thing in the world that suduce us and steal little bits of our lives from us if we let them. If we let them! that is the key, we are all here because we have let ourselves to be controlled (enslaved) by this poison! I have no problem hating UST, they are definitely an evil placed out there to lure uneducated, unsuspecting victims into there clutches! I have my ideas about their role in the world, but the only thing that is important is that we never give into them ever again and always take opportunities to educate others!
Amen.
:wub:
-
Last night I made a post in the general discussion and later deleted it. Luckily I deleted it before anyone commented on it so not too many of you read it. Some of those that saw it pmed me, thank you. I'm not 100 % sure what spured my feelings. I think I was feeling like I was failing which is just the opposite of the truth. I've not been able to sleep since I've been over analyzing my quit and some of my thoughts.Â
I hear many of you spew hatred of big tabacco and I feel weak because I don't feel that. I have analyzed my addiction as far back as I can remember and can only come up with 2 things that ever influenced me: I grew up in an era most of you wouldn't recognize with sitcoms where couples had seperate beds but everyone on TV smoked! Cigarette ads were on the TV as much as ED ads are on now! I can honestly say that the only real suductive ads for me was the Marlboro Man. My first smoke was to be cool like him. The other influence was on the lid of my Former favorite cope "satisfaction Since 1822". I can't blame big tabacco for my addiction. I grew up around smokers, I watched a close family member die of emphysema in her early 40's, my parent taught me the dangers of tabacco. I was seduced by peers and pure curiosity. I'll admit I was clueless as to how addictive nicotine was. But I knew the health dangers, when I was first experimenting was the same time TV ads were band. We heard the surgeon general reports and debate regularly. I own my worthless decision to use tabacco! I can't blame anyone else. I know many of you got involved from sports and sport endorsements and I now realize that is a very relavent issue that so many of you have that I do not have! I was just a attention seeking teen that got caught by the bitch.
The other issue I was moaning about was the fact that it seemed my quit would go
In cycles where when I have a good week or two it seems to lead me into a period I start thinking long term and I fail. I know better, today I can quit! I will continue to quit today. Remember there is "no tommorrow only today". When I can't sleep you suffer with my rambling, I'm Not sorry it's just the way it is!
great stuff, wt57-- when you a laying it down like this you ramble all you want-- I own my quit too
So WT you and I have been partners and friends in controlling our addiction to nicotine.
Bottom line, we can disagree on who to be mad at or hold accountable for our addiction. Whatever motivates and encourages us to stay quit is good. If it motivates you to take the blame for your choices and hold US Tobacco blameless, that is fine. My perspective is a little different. I do believe US Tobacco has cancer blood on their hands. In the late 1960's, tobacco's own research proved that their product was addictive and had carcinogens in it.
They buried that information. Even when they were brought to testify in front of Congress they lied under oath and it was proven that they lied. (Where was Erin Brokovich?) This weed kills and Government only fined them and force changes on how they advertised? (In exchange that no individual can bring a claim against US Tobacco?)
Did these liars and killers sink and die? Nope they got creative. Still recruiting children to get addicted to the product so that they can replace their dead or quit customers.
Was it your choice to dip? YES it was and I get that. I chose to dip too. However, not having any animosity, enmity and disgust for the deception is hard for someone like me to comprehend.
People chose to invest with Bernie Madoff. Yet he is being tried and not loved. So Bernie Madoff is despised and hated for his acts of seduction and deception. His scheme hurt many financially and no one disagrees for hating him.
US Tobacco gets a pass by addicts, former addicts, politicians etc. Seems like everyone blames the users and not the company.
If you can invest with Bernie Madoff, Drink contaminated water from a company that isn't worried about your health. They get locked up and put out of business? Why is US Tobacco held blameless by addicts, politicians etc. Why isn't there a cry of fowl like there is for Poncy schemes or chemical contamination?
I do hate them! Now making laws against the product only glamorizes it so I am not for making it illegal. However, I can and do hate the seedy, cunning craftiness of their product.
There is evil in this world. Tobacco and all who support, sympathize or accept it existence is not of the same mind I am. I am at war. I can not be merciful to a company or product that kills, destroys or enslaves my fellow man.
Tobacco can cause cancer and kill.
Tobacco enslaves the user to a shitty false sense of importance. I would even say most of us worshiped tobacco.
It not only kills, it enslaves and destroys our spirits. Since today is 9/11 some people think America and its citizens deserved that attack. I don't think the world deserves US Tobacco coming into their cities and killing their citizens for money. Yes I did compare US Tobacco to a Terrorist Organization. If you think I am wrong, study the evil business more!
To hell with US Tobacco. I own my addiction and I did choose but those butt fucks knowingly and intentionally lead me to it...even when I wasn't at a legal age to chose for myself! Do they have no accountability? Are they blameless?
I think not! They are filthy. I hate them and I am at war. Never, ever again will I surrender to the feeling or thought that I miss my can. I may have cravings but I remember that I hate them and when you go to war you win. I am Quit and I HATE TOBACCO. YOU SHOULD TOO. LOOK AT YOUR GRAND KIDS AND IMAGINE BIG TOBACCO PLAYING THE FLUTE AND LEADING THEM ON TO A LIFE OF ADDICTION. What would you think then?
Mt you know I love you not in a Gmann way but as a brother. We are not in total disagreement but in degrees of hatred and blame. I do despise so many of the gimmicks being used to seduce young kids into using tabacco ie. pouches, flavored dip, fancy packaging and new delivery systems! I hate what tabacco has done to my life, I recognize the millions of people who have been killed and enslaved by the poison. I understand your comparison to Bernie Madeoff to a Point. Even when I started using tabacco products the publicity was there about the risks and consequences of tabacco. Today the warnings are many times greater. How many times did you run your fingernail around a can of dip breaking the seal and read the various warnings? What thoughts went threw your mind as you read the warnings? I always tried to ignore the warning but I doubt a day ever went by that I didn't read that warning and either try to ignore it or cringe secretly hoping I would one who didn't get cancer! I already had tooth loss and had gum graphs! As far as my Grandkids your right I will be there and will join you in fighting the evil deceptive advertising and do everything in my power to educate them and their friends. All of that being said I still Do not blame US Tabacco for my addiction, they did have a role but I was a dumb ass for a very long time!
Which brings us back to which came first the chicken or the egg? What does it matter when we have both now?
My personal experience is that quitting tobacco was a battle. I felt I needed to own my addiction but I was so angry at what I became under the influence of Tobacco. It was all me and yes the buck stops with me.
However as I was going through owning my addiction and owning my quit, Rgross simply told me that it is good and okay to HATE that industry. Since that time, the burden of quit has been easy and I have enjoyed the fight!
Still undefeated. All I really want to do is pay it forward. Any new quitter needs to know that it is okay to Hate US Tobacco. Especially Christians that are taught to turn the other check or love your enemy. Tobacco is not human. It is a tool of the devil. You can hate evil and that is all that comes from US Tobacco. If they don't want to hate, that is fine too but it is okay to hate this beast.
Nice discussion, think I'll chime in.
The Tobacco industry knowingly sells a product that murders and enslaves people. Destroys relationships and steals your money. They clear their conscious with minimalized, half-ass attempts to warn their customers of the dangers while they laugh and count their profits on the tombstones. They are disgusting. And I was a dumbass for feeding their greed for almost forty years. But now my eyes are open. I can see that nicotine whore for what she really is. Never again. Not once. I hate tobacco with a passion and it is banned from my life...and yours.
'clap'
That fires me up! We all are quit today and are winners Take your filthy lucre soaked in your dead and addicted customers blood and tears and live with what you did to line your pockets!
US Tobacco...No more!!!! I see you for what you do. You are not blameless. I will not surrender to my addiction. My money will never become yours again. NEVER.
'Finger'
I think I get it! I get it! The pied piper had a lot more involvement in my addiction that I ever recognized. Tabacco sucks ass, I hate everything about tabacco and how my addiction stole my life. This discussion has changed my attitude dramatically. I still own my childish decision to cave to peer pressure, and foolish curiosity. I wish I could reach out to every young teen and tell them my story and how fucked up my life has been because of some poison in a can with a shinny lid! I can't reach a lot of kids but I am a scout master and work with young boys at church. They will hear from me the evils of tabacco ever chance I get as will my grandchildren!! There are a lot of evil thing in the world that suduce us and steal little bits of our lives from us if we let them. If we let them! that is the key, we are all here because we have let ourselves to be controlled (enslaved) by this poison! I have no problem hating UST, they are definitely an evil placed out there to lure uneducated, unsuspecting victims into there clutches! I have my ideas about their role in the world, but the only thing that is important is that we never give into them ever again and always take opportunities to educate others!
Amen.
:wub:
Fat bastards don't get to blame pigs because they ate bacon. Drunk driver's don't get to blame Budweiser after they kill some innocent kid. Murderers don't get to blame Smith and Wesson. Why are we any different?
The blame game is easy. Owning your decisions and holding yourself accountable, now there is a challenge worthy of praise.
Just my 2 cents, but whatever keeps YOU quit, stick with it.
-
Fat bastards don't get to blame pigs because they ate bacon. Drunk driver's don't get to blame Budweiser after they kill some innocent kid. Murderers don't get to blame Smith and Wesson. Why are we any different?
The blame game is easy. Owning your decisions and holding yourself accountable, now there is a challenge worthy of praise.
Love the rationalization game. You think guns, bacon, and Budweiser are as addictive as nicotine, eh?
By that logic, what is the difference between the crack dealer on your corner selling your kids rocks and the tobacco companies? He's out of business unless he has addicts, and he's motivated.
Also, this isn't a blame game. Being angry at the suppliers/peddlers and acknowledging your own role in becoming addicted aren't mutually exclusive, folks.
I was a dumbass to start, I was a dumbass to continue using for 21 years despite all of the warnings, gut feelings, anxieties, and I was a loser for being hopeless for thinking I could never quit. I was also smart, strong, and a badass for throwing away the can forever.
Simultaneously, UST, big tobacco, can lick my fucking nuts for their role in introducing and sustaining a highly addictive, poisonous, miserable product into my life. Fuck them.
I own my decisions and hold myself accountable, and we are all worthy of praise for overcoming this great burden of an addiction. I'm also not a tobacco apologist. There's no honor or reward for defending an immoral industry . . . is there?
-
Fat bastards don't get to blame pigs because they ate bacon. Drunk driver's don't get to blame Budweiser after they kill some innocent kid. Murderers don't get to blame Smith and Wesson. Why are we any different?
The blame game is easy. Owning your decisions and holding yourself accountable, now there is a challenge worthy of praise.
Love the rationalization game. You think guns, bacon, and Budweiser are as addictive as nicotine, eh?
By that logic, what is the difference between the crack dealer on your corner selling your kids rocks and the tobacco companies? He's out of business unless he has addicts, and he's motivated.
Also, this isn't a blame game. Being angry at the suppliers/peddlers and acknowledging your own role in becoming addicted aren't mutually exclusive, folks.
I was a dumbass to start, I was a dumbass to continue using for 21 years despite all of the warnings, gut feelings, anxieties, and I was a loser for being hopeless for thinking I could never quit. I was also smart, strong, and a badass for throwing away the can forever.
Simultaneously, UST, big tobacco, can lick my fucking nuts for their role in introducing and sustaining a highly addictive, poisonous, miserable product into my life. Fuck them.
I own my decisions and hold myself accountable, and we are all worthy of praise for overcoming this great burden of an addiction. I'm also not a tobacco apologist. There's no honor or reward for defending an immoral industry . . . is there?
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Rack 'em.
I agree with this post. This is as true at getting 4 from 2 + 2.
-
Fat bastards don't get to blame pigs because they ate bacon. Drunk driver's don't get to blame Budweiser after they kill some innocent kid. Murderers don't get to blame Smith and Wesson. Why are we any different?
The blame game is easy. Owning your decisions and holding yourself accountable, now there is a challenge worthy of praise.
Love the rationalization game. You think guns, bacon, and Budweiser are as addictive as nicotine, eh?
By that logic, what is the difference between the crack dealer on your corner selling your kids rocks and the tobacco companies? He's out of business unless he has addicts, and he's motivated.
Also, this isn't a blame game. Being angry at the suppliers/peddlers and acknowledging your own role in becoming addicted aren't mutually exclusive, folks.
I was a dumbass to start, I was a dumbass to continue using for 21 years despite all of the warnings, gut feelings, anxieties, and I was a loser for being hopeless for thinking I could never quit. I was also smart, strong, and a badass for throwing away the can forever.
Simultaneously, UST, big tobacco, can lick my fucking nuts for their role in introducing and sustaining a highly addictive, poisonous, miserable product into my life. Fuck them.
I own my decisions and hold myself accountable, and we are all worthy of praise for overcoming this great burden of an addiction. I'm also not a tobacco apologist. There's no honor or reward for defending an immoral industry . . . is there?
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Rack 'em.
I agree with this post. This is as true at getting 4 from 2 + 2.
Everyone, thank you! My understanding of my own attitude and feelings towards UST their responsibility and me and my responsibility for my addiction is in a new light! I don't think I've changed just understand it better. rgross you have put it all together. Just another testimony of how this site works to strengthen our quits!
-
Fat bastards don't get to blame pigs because they ate bacon. Drunk driver's don't get to blame Budweiser after they kill some innocent kid. Murderers don't get to blame Smith and Wesson. Why are we any different?
The blame game is easy. Owning your decisions and holding yourself accountable, now there is a challenge worthy of praise.
Love the rationalization game. You think guns, bacon, and Budweiser are as addictive as nicotine, eh?
By that logic, what is the difference between the crack dealer on your corner selling your kids rocks and the tobacco companies? He's out of business unless he has addicts, and he's motivated.
Also, this isn't a blame game. Being angry at the suppliers/peddlers and acknowledging your own role in becoming addicted aren't mutually exclusive, folks.
I was a dumbass to start, I was a dumbass to continue using for 21 years despite all of the warnings, gut feelings, anxieties, and I was a loser for being hopeless for thinking I could never quit. I was also smart, strong, and a badass for throwing away the can forever.
Simultaneously, UST, big tobacco, can lick my fucking nuts for their role in introducing and sustaining a highly addictive, poisonous, miserable product into my life. Fuck them.
I own my decisions and hold myself accountable, and we are all worthy of praise for overcoming this great burden of an addiction. I'm also not a tobacco apologist. There's no honor or reward for defending an immoral industry . . . is there?
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Rack 'em.
I agree with this post. This is as true at getting 4 from 2 + 2.
Everyone, thank you! My understanding of my own attitude and feelings towards UST their responsibility and me and my responsibility for my addiction is in a new light! I don't think I've changed just understand it better. rgross you have put it all together. Just another testimony of how this site works to strengthen our quits!
Again, my post is only my perspective. If hating Big T gets you through, then hate them mother fuckers with everything you have. Not telling you otherwise. Just stay quit, whatever it takes.
But a bigger theology, God made tobacco. Knowing it's addictive properties. My God gave me free will and grace. I don't blame God for my addiction. I started, and I quit. I could have quit along time ago, but I exercised my free will and chose to keep on stuffing that shit in my mouth for 31 years. Not trying to push church, just saying you can take blame as far as you want. All the way to the top. Fact is, every time we packed a can or lit up, we could have said "fuck no". We didn't.
Just to be clear, I never made the statement than one thing is more addictive than another. Not the point. The point is, if you put the muzzle of the gun to someone's head and pull the trigger, that was a choice you made. Smith and Wesson made the gun, and sold it to you, but they had no part in your decision to take a life. That was all you. When you walk through the grocery store, the turkey bacon is right beside the pork. If you pick up the pig, the farmer has no liability when you have a fucking heart attack. Your choice, your bad decision. Budweiser sells beer. You bought it, you drank it and got drunk, you decided to get behind the wheel and drive. The blood is on your hands when you kill the kid.
In 31 years of dipping, I was never pressured or lured by commercials or ads or men standing in trenchcoats in an alley way encouraging me to "just try it". There was no "dealer" or "pusher". No goon squad jumped out of a van and made me put another one in like in the Stride Chewing Gum commercials. Only a can full of poison, and the will to put it in my mouth. I was just a dumbass that was not strong enough, AT THE TIME, to stop.
Now that I am quit, I know that I had a choice each and every day to dip or not. I chose to dip. The point of my post is blaming anyone or anything other than yourself for your actions, well, it's just an excuse in my opinion. If you disagree, no harm no foul. I respect your opinion, try and respect mine. I think that the more perspectives we have, the more likely we all are to stay quit.
The world will never be free of companies and people ready to make a profit at others expense. There will always be harmful shit out there to change the way you feel, think, see, live......but you can choose not to start using. Or, as we do here, we can choose NOT TO USE TODAY. Today, I choose not to put that shit in my body. Quit with all of you.......
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In 31 years of dipping, I was never pressured or lured by commercials or ads or men standing in trenchcoats in an alley way encouraging me to "just try it". There was no "dealer" or "pusher". No goon squad jumped out of a van and made me put another one in like in the Stride Chewing Gum commercials. Only a can full of poison, and the will to put it in my mouth. I was just a dumbass that was not strong enough, AT THE TIME, to stop.
Nothing but you and God's Freewill Tobacco, eh? Where did you get this magical, free-will nicotine-free addiction-proof stuff, because I want some of this.
Take a look in Indonesia, where tobacco lobbyists have free reign, tobacco ads are rampant, taxes are nil, and 70% of the male population (according to a recent Time article, check my most recent post in my intro for the link) smokes, and something like 51% of the entire population does. Freewill over there in Indonesia? In the other 3rd-world countries where usage rates are skyrocketing where everyone is poor? It's all their choice, right, and Big Tobacco is just the amoral business?
Bullshit.
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In 31 years of dipping, I was never pressured or lured by commercials or ads or men standing in trenchcoats in an alley way encouraging me to "just try it". There was no "dealer" or "pusher". No goon squad jumped out of a van and made me put another one in like in the Stride Chewing Gum commercials. Only a can full of poison, and the will to put it in my mouth. I was just a dumbass that was not strong enough, AT THE TIME, to stop.
Nothing but you and God's Freewill Tobacco, eh? Where did you get this magical, free-will nicotine-free addiction-proof stuff, because I want some of this.
Take a look in Indonesia, where tobacco lobbyists have free reign, tobacco ads are rampant, taxes are nil, and 70% of the male population (according to a recent Time article, check my most recent post in my intro for the link) smokes, and something like 51% of the entire population does. Freewill over there in Indonesia? In the other 3rd-world countries where usage rates are skyrocketing where everyone is poor? It's all their choice, right, and Big Tobacco is just the amoral business?
Bullshit.
I AM nicotine free, I thought you were. If you are quit today, It's because of your choice. The one you made today. If you chose this morning, you have already found the magical shit bro. It's called free will. The way you make it sound is I said God instilled freewill in the tobacco. No, my statement is MY God, the one I believe in, gave ME free will. With tobacco or any thing else. It is up to me to make the right decision. I didn't for many years. I did today, UST didn't influence that decision. Never did. But, what does that have to do with Indionesia?
You seem to be pretty pissed that I have a different view. Not healthy bro...I gave you grace as well. Tried to make that very clear. If hating them helps you, then hate them well. I support YOU in what you need to help you stay quit. I didn't think we were trying to convert one another, thought we were just having a discussion
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In 31 years of dipping, I was never pressured or lured by commercials or ads or men standing in trenchcoats in an alley way encouraging me to "just try it". There was no "dealer" or "pusher". No goon squad jumped out of a van and made me put another one in like in the Stride Chewing Gum commercials. Only a can full of poison, and the will to put it in my mouth. I was just a dumbass that was not strong enough, AT THE TIME, to stop.
Nothing but you and God's Freewill Tobacco, eh? Where did you get this magical, free-will nicotine-free addiction-proof stuff, because I want some of this.
Take a look in Indonesia, where tobacco lobbyists have free reign, tobacco ads are rampant, taxes are nil, and 70% of the male population (according to a recent Time article, check my most recent post in my intro for the link) smokes, and something like 51% of the entire population does. Freewill over there in Indonesia? In the other 3rd-world countries where usage rates are skyrocketing where everyone is poor? It's all their choice, right, and Big Tobacco is just the amoral business?
Bullshit.
I AM nicotine free, I thought you were. If you are quit today, It's because of your choice. The one you made today. If you chose this morning, you have already found the magical shit bro. It's called free will. The way you make it sound is I said God instilled freewill in the tobacco. No, my statement is MY God, the one I believe in, gave ME free will. With tobacco or any thing else. It is up to me to make the right decision. I didn't for many years. I did today, UST didn't influence that decision. Never did. But, what does that have to do with Indionesia?
You seem to be pretty pissed that I have a different view. Not healthy bro...I gave you grace as well. Tried to make that very clear. If hating them helps you, then hate them well. I support YOU in what you need to help you stay quit. I didn't think we were trying to convert one another, thought we were just having a discussion
Jag, take your right hand, and whoosh it over your head.
I'm not pissed that we have differing opinions. I'm not trying to "convert" you. I'm merely defending my position on UST and tobacco manufacturers. You know, the opinion that you voluntarily chimed in on. It's called a debate. Speaking of debate, you didn't address ANY of my points. At all. So given that, we will agree to disagree.
However, I do challenge you to read the article from Time:
http://healthland.time.com/2012/08/17/l ... -warnings/ (http://healthland.time.com/2012/08/17/larg...-dire-warnings/)
I'd be interested to hear how an addict of 31 years thinks after reading that. As a 21 year addict, I'm angry at big tobacco. We can shrug our shoulders and walk away, or we can take an objective look at what those companies are doing and hey, maybe do something about it. If nothing else, maybe stop acting like all businesses are amoral and pass along some better values to those in our circle of influence.
Aside from all that, I'm glad to you are quit, and I quit with you today.
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Wow! 100 days ago I was flying high on a quit adrenalin rush, in the words of Mthomas "Like Christmas Eve". Well this 100 days has been much easier until this past week. The excitement is missing it feels more like the day of my 50th birthday, kind of depressing. I have trouble letting go of the past and have fears of the future! Well I have learned a very important lesson here about life and am trying very hard to implement it in more than just my addiction, that is; Live Life One Day At A Time. There is no good that comes from reliving the spilled milk of the past and none of us know what the future has in store for us.
Some quitters seem to feel comfortable going on their own after certain milestones, for me not posting roll makes staying quit on my own too risky. Taking time each day to promise my B.O.Q. Group that I will stay quit for the day is a small sacrifice for freedom. I haven't missed a day yet and I have no intentions of missing a day in the next 100 days! The bond between quitters continues to grow stronger among those of us that remain. Thank you to everyone who has helped me reach another marker on this road of quit!
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Wow! 100 days ago I was flying high on a quit adrenalin rush, in the words of Mthomas "Like Christmas Eve". Well this 100 days has been much easier until this past week. The excitement is missing it feels more like the day of my 50th birthday, kind of depressing. I have trouble letting go of the past and have fears of the future! Well I have learned a very important lesson here about life and am trying very hard to implement it in more than just my addiction, that is; Live Life One Day At A Time. There is no good that comes from reliving the spilled milk of the past and none of us know what the future has in store for us.
Some quitters seem to feel comfortable going on their own after certain milestones, for me not posting roll makes staying quit on my own too risky. Taking time each day to promise my B.O.Q. Group that I will stay quit for the day is a small sacrifice for freedom. I haven't missed a day yet and I have no intentions of missing a day in the next 100 days! The bond between quitters continues to grow stronger among those of us that remain. Thank you to everyone who has helped me reach another marker on this road of quit!
We cannot fix the problems of yesterday, we cannot plan for the present, we can only prepare for the future. Posting roll is preparation for the future of the day. The day always looks brighter once we commit to each other for one day. Proud to be quit with you.
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Wow! 100 days ago I was flying high on a quit adrenalin rush, in the words of Mthomas "Like Christmas Eve". Well this 100 days has been much easier until this past week. The excitement is missing it feels more like the day of my 50th birthday, kind of depressing. I have trouble letting go of the past and have fears of the future! Well I have learned a very important lesson here about life and am trying very hard to implement it in more than just my addiction, that is; Live Life One Day At A Time. There is no good that comes from reliving the spilled milk of the past and none of us know what the future has in store for us.Â
Some quitters seem to feel comfortable going on their own after certain milestones, for me not posting roll makes staying quit on my own too risky. Taking time each day to promise my B.O.Q. Group that I will stay quit for the day is a small sacrifice for freedom. I haven't missed a day yet and I have no intentions of missing a day in the next 100 days! The bond between quitters continues to grow stronger among those of us that remain. Thank you to everyone who has helped me reach another marker on this road of quit!
We cannot fix the problems of yesterday, we cannot plan for the present, we can only prepare for the future. Posting roll is preparation for the future of the day. The day always looks brighter once we commit to each other for one day. Proud to be quit with you.
Everyday brings a new challenge. We have to be sure we're prepared. I Think of it as a mechanic going to work without his tools. He wouldn't get much work done for the day. Posting roll is a tool, but it's the largest and most important tool in the box.
The quit isn't a path, it's a long road. A journey. 100 days, 200 days, 300, days? A drop in the bucket compared to how long we poisoned ourselves. It's gonna take some real time. The journey will have beautiful scenery along the way. It will also have some severe weather. Look out the window each day, and thank god you're alive to enjoy the trip. Some people never make it.
Just remember that while you're walking down the road I'm right beside you, and many others are beside you as well. Our destination is a place of peace, and happiness, and we'll enjoy it together my brother...
Have a great day.. it's beautiful outside!
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When I quit I had been reading all I could for 2 days , I really wanted to be free! I am a rather quiet guy that takes meds to keep me from having panic attacks around people. I was more than a little apprehensive about opening up my secret life as a ninja dipper especially to total strangers. Turned out that hasn't been a problem.
In Quitting I tried to do everything that 'vets' told me. (At the time I considered everyone wit more days than me, vets) I put myself in a padded room with no windows and locked the door with new weatherstripping. I got very active, raged online, got numbers from most every quitter in my month and many others. I learned to use the tools to the fullest extent.
After a few weeks I moved myself from the padded cell into my real life. I still made sure the doors and windows were shut. That evil bitch hounded me, relentlessly but I continued to win each battle. Finally HOF was here, time went very fast. Sure I had lots of craving and thoughts of failure but I had solid tools that brought me through tough times.
Here I set at 234 days. The doors and windows are closed and I don't hear the scratching at the doors daily, but she is still hiding in the shrubbery. Lately I've been thinking about my future with nicotine. Sure i know better, today is all we can be sure of! So why do I have those romantic thoughts of having a one night stand with that scanky bitch? I'm an addict! Because I'm that addict I keep a extra key hidden just in case. How messed up is that? All of you new quitters need to learn; we are always addicts and our addicted minds are never safe to be left alone. That is why I come here early every day and make you my promise to keep the that door locked and that extra key in the lock box! I hope some day to forget where that extra key is at but until then, I'll see you in the morning!!
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When I quit I had been reading all I could for 2 days , I really wanted to be free! I am a rather quiet guy that takes meds to keep me from having panic attacks around people. I was more than a little apprehensive about opening up my secret life as a ninja dipper especially to total strangers. Turned out that hasn't been a problem.
In Quitting I tried to do everything that 'vets' told me. (At the time I considered everyone wit more days than me, vets) I put myself in a padded room with no windows and locked the door with new weatherstripping. I got very active, raged online, got numbers from most every quitter in my month and many others. I learned to use the tools to the fullest extent.
After a few weeks I moved myself from the padded cell into my real life. I still made sure the doors and windows were shut. That evil bitch hounded me, relentlessly but I continued to win each battle. Finally HOF was here, time went very fast. Sure I had lots of craving and thoughts of failure but I had solid tools that brought me through tough times.
Here I set at 234 days. The doors and windows are closed and I don't hear the scratching at the doors daily, but she is still hiding in the shrubbery. Lately I've been thinking about my future with nicotine. Sure i know better, today is all we can be sure of! So why do I have those romantic thoughts of having a one night stand with that scanky bitch? I'm an addict! Because I'm that addict I keep a extra key hidden just in case. How messed up is that? All of you new quitters need to learn; we are always addicts and our addicted minds are never safe to be left alone. That is why I come here early every day and make you my promise to keep the that door locked and that extra key in the lock box! I hope some day to forget where that extra key is at but until then, I'll see you in the morning!!
Bravo Brother...QLAFM
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When I quit I had been reading all I could for 2 days , I really wanted to be free! I am a rather quiet guy that takes meds to keep me from having panic attacks around people. I was more than a little apprehensive about opening up my secret life as a ninja dipper especially to total strangers. Turned out that hasn't been a problem.Â
In Quitting I tried to do everything that 'vets' told me. (At the time I considered everyone wit more days than me, vets) I put myself in a padded room with no windows and locked the door with new weatherstripping. I got very active, raged online, got numbers from most every quitter in my month and many others. I learned to use the tools to the fullest extent.
After a few weeks I moved myself from the padded cell into my real life. I still made sure the doors and windows were shut. That evil bitch hounded me, relentlessly but I continued to win each battle. Finally HOF was here, time went very fast. Sure I had lots of craving and thoughts of failure but I had solid tools that brought me through tough times.Â
Here I set at 234 days. The doors and windows are closed and I don't hear the scratching at the doors daily, but she is still hiding in the shrubbery. Lately I've been thinking about my future with nicotine. Sure i know better, today is all we can be sure of! So why do I have those romantic thoughts of having a one night stand with that scanky bitch? I'm an addict! Because I'm that addict I keep a extra key hidden just in case. How messed up is that? All of you new quitters need to learn; we are always addicts and our addicted minds are never safe to be left alone. That is why I come here early every day and make you my promise to keep the that door locked and that extra key in the lock box! I hope some day to forget where that extra key is at but until then, I'll see you in the morning!!
Bravo Brother...QLAFM
WT you have helped me so many times, and I thank you. You always seem to reach out or say something at the right moment. You've helped me more than you'll ever know.. Don't worry bro, we're all outside your house waiting for the bitch to come out of the shrubbery. Then whammo!! Might as well forget about that lockbox. I got rid of it for you. It's gone.. If you do start to look for it let me know, and I'll take you to lunch instead..
Peace my friend
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When I quit I had been reading all I could for 2 days , I really wanted to be free! I am a rather quiet guy that takes meds to keep me from having panic attacks around people. I was more than a little apprehensive about opening up my secret life as a ninja dipper especially to total strangers. Turned out that hasn't been a problem.Â
In Quitting I tried to do everything that 'vets' told me. (At the time I considered everyone wit more days than me, vets)  I put myself in a padded room with no windows and locked the door with new weatherstripping. I got very active, raged online, got numbers from most every quitter in my month and many others. I learned to use the tools to the fullest extent.
After a few weeks I moved myself from the padded cell into my real life. I still made sure the doors and windows were shut. That evil bitch hounded me, relentlessly but I continued to win each battle. Finally HOF was here, time went very fast. Sure I had lots of craving and thoughts of failure but I had solid tools that brought me through tough times.Â
Here I set at 234 days. The doors and windows are closed and I don't hear the scratching at the doors daily, but she is still hiding in the shrubbery. Lately I've been thinking about my future with nicotine. Sure i know better, today is all we can be sure of! So why do I have those romantic thoughts of having a one night stand with that scanky bitch? I'm an addict! Because I'm that addict I keep a extra key hidden just in case. How messed up is that? All of you new quitters need to learn; we are always addicts and our addicted minds are never safe to be left alone. That is why I come here early every day and make you my promise to keep the that door locked and that extra key in the lock box! I hope some day to forget where that extra key is at but until then, I'll see you in the morning!!
Bravo Brother...QLAFM
WT you have helped me so many times, and I thank you. You always seem to reach out or say something at the right moment. You've helped me more than you'll ever know.. Don't worry bro, we're all outside your house waiting for the bitch to come out of the shrubbery. Then whammo!! Might as well forget about that lockbox. I got rid of it for you. It's gone.. If you do start to look for it let me know, and I'll take you to lunch instead..
Peace my friend
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
'army' Quit with you WT
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When I quit I had been reading all I could for 2 days , I really wanted to be free! I am a rather quiet guy that takes meds to keep me from having panic attacks around people. I was more than a little apprehensive about opening up my secret life as a ninja dipper especially to total strangers. Turned out that hasn't been a problem.Â
In Quitting I tried to do everything that 'vets' told me. (At the time I considered everyone wit more days than me, vets)  I put myself in a padded room with no windows and locked the door with new weatherstripping. I got very active, raged online, got numbers from most every quitter in my month and many others. I learned to use the tools to the fullest extent.
After a few weeks I moved myself from the padded cell into my real life. I still made sure the doors and windows were shut. That evil bitch hounded me, relentlessly but I continued to win each battle. Finally HOF was here, time went very fast. Sure I had lots of craving and thoughts of failure but I had solid tools that brought me through tough times.Â
Here I set at 234 days. The doors and windows are closed and I don't hear the scratching at the doors daily, but she is still hiding in the shrubbery. Lately I've been thinking about my future with nicotine. Sure i know better, today is all we can be sure of! So why do I have those romantic thoughts of having a one night stand with that scanky bitch? I'm an addict! Because I'm that addict I keep a extra key hidden just in case. How messed up is that? All of you new quitters need to learn; we are always addicts and our addicted minds are never safe to be left alone. That is why I come here early every day and make you my promise to keep the that door locked and that extra key in the lock box! I hope some day to forget where that extra key is at but until then, I'll see you in the morning!!
Bravo Brother...QLAFM
WT you have helped me so many times, and I thank you. You always seem to reach out or say something at the right moment. You've helped me more than you'll ever know.. Don't worry bro, we're all outside your house waiting for the bitch to come out of the shrubbery. Then whammo!! Might as well forget about that lockbox. I got rid of it for you. It's gone.. If you do start to look for it let me know, and I'll take you to lunch instead..
Peace my friend
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
'army' Quit with you WT
x2
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When I quit I had been reading all I could for 2 days , I really wanted to be free! I am a rather quiet guy that takes meds to keep me from having panic attacks around people. I was more than a little apprehensive about opening up my secret life as a ninja dipper especially to total strangers. Turned out that hasn't been a problem.Â
In Quitting I tried to do everything that 'vets' told me. (At the time I considered everyone wit more days than me, vets)  I put myself in a padded room with no windows and locked the door with new weatherstripping. I got very active, raged online, got numbers from most every quitter in my month and many others. I learned to use the tools to the fullest extent.
After a few weeks I moved myself from the padded cell into my real life. I still made sure the doors and windows were shut. That evil bitch hounded me, relentlessly but I continued to win each battle. Finally HOF was here, time went very fast. Sure I had lots of craving and thoughts of failure but I had solid tools that brought me through tough times.Â
Here I set at 234 days. The doors and windows are closed and I don't hear the scratching at the doors daily, but she is still hiding in the shrubbery. Lately I've been thinking about my future with nicotine. Sure i know better, today is all we can be sure of! So why do I have those romantic thoughts of having a one night stand with that scanky bitch? I'm an addict! Because I'm that addict I keep a extra key hidden just in case. How messed up is that? All of you new quitters need to learn; we are always addicts and our addicted minds are never safe to be left alone. That is why I come here early every day and make you my promise to keep the that door locked and that extra key in the lock box! I hope some day to forget where that extra key is at but until then, I'll see you in the morning!!
Bravo Brother...QLAFM
WT you have helped me so many times, and I thank you. You always seem to reach out or say something at the right moment. You've helped me more than you'll ever know.. Don't worry bro, we're all outside your house waiting for the bitch to come out of the shrubbery. Then whammo!! Might as well forget about that lockbox. I got rid of it for you. It's gone.. If you do start to look for it let me know, and I'll take you to lunch instead..
Peace my friend
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
'army' Quit with you WT
x2
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
OUTSTANDING BROTHER!!!!
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Take what you need leave the rest
The importance of this statement has become very clear to me over the past few days. In the past 240+ days I've put myself out there for most every newbie and offered my support. Up until this point I needed to do this for me. I no longer need this. I need my daily promise and to look out for my BOQs. Sure I have a lot of other quitters that have become important to me and I'm still here for support. As I reached out recently with some serious thoughts and concerns I was told that "I was looking for a reason to take my ball and play somewhere else". This is not the case at all but I do realize that I've been more concerned about others quit than my own at times and this needs to change. So for me it is time not to take my ball somewhere else but change my game strategy. What I need is my daily promise! I'm a 100% poster and will continue to be, other than that I don't need it for now!
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Take what you need leave the rest
The importance of this statement has become very clear to me over the past few days. In the past 240+ days I've put myself out there for most every newbie and offered my support. Up until this point I needed to do this for me. I no longer need this. I need my daily promise and to look out for my BOQs. Sure I have a lot of other quitters that have become important to me and I'm still here for support. As I reached out recently with some serious thoughts and concerns I was told that "I was looking for a reason to take my ball and play somewhere else". This is not the case at all but I do realize that I've been more concerned about others quit than my own at times and this needs to change. So for me it is time not to take my ball somewhere else but change my game strategy. What I need is my daily promise! I'm a 100% poster and will continue to be, other than that I don't need it for now!
I am also a 100% poster (for 252 days). I taperd way way off on helping newbs shortly after I hit 100.
I hope that doesn't make me an asshole ( I am one anyway though).
I still chime in on certain intros that strike something in me to respond.
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Take what you need leave the rest
The importance of this statement has become very clear to me over the past few days. In the past 240+ days I've put myself out there for most every newbie and offered my support. Up until this point I needed to do this for me. I no longer need this. I need my daily promise and to look out for my BOQs. Sure I have a lot of other quitters that have become important to me and I'm still here for support. As I reached out recently with some serious thoughts and concerns I was told that "I was looking for a reason to take my ball and play somewhere else". This is not the case at all but I do realize that I've been more concerned about others quit than my own at times and this needs to change. So for me it is time not to take my ball somewhere else but change my game strategy. What I need is my daily promise! I'm a 100% poster and will continue to be, other than that I don't need it for now!
I hear you brother. I am at the same place. I look out for my quit first and foremost, then the needs of the Madmen. I am 100% poster, and that will not change. I am ALWAYS available to ANYONE who reaches out for help, but I have stopped putting myself out there only to have people who think they have everything figured out make dumbass comments like that.
There is no shame in stepping back for a little bit, and letting some things work themselves out. I have been where you are and felt what you are feeling. You have helped a TON of newbies and Vets through alot of tough times. Keep that close to you, and take care of YOU for a while.
You are a baddas quitter, and I gladly quit with you all day, any day! QLAFM
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Take what you need leave the rest
The importance of this statement has become very clear to me over the past few days. In the past 240+ days I've put myself out there for most every newbie and offered my support. Up until this point I needed to do this for me. I no longer need this. I need my daily promise and to look out for my BOQs. Sure I have a lot of other quitters that have become important to me and I'm still here for support. As I reached out recently with some serious thoughts and concerns I was told that "I was looking for a reason to take my ball and play somewhere else". This is not the case at all but I do realize that I've been more concerned about others quit than my own at times and this needs to change. So for me it is time not to take my ball somewhere else but change my game strategy. What I need is my daily promise! I'm a 100% poster and will continue to be, other than that I don't need it for now!
I hear you brother. I am at the same place. I look out for my quit first and foremost, then the needs of the Madmen. I am 100% poster, and that will not change. I am ALWAYS available to ANYONE who reaches out for help, but I have stopped putting myself out there only to have people who think they have everything figured out make dumbass comments like that.
There is no shame in stepping back for a little bit, and letting some things work themselves out. I have been where you are and felt what you are feeling. You have helped a TON of newbies and Vets through alot of tough times. Keep that close to you, and take care of YOU for a while.
You are a baddas quitter, and I gladly quit with you all day, any day! QLAFM
When times are good, we practice for the bad times.
When times are bad, we use our tools we learned here.
We can do this men.
-
Christmas Day a time of giving and receiving gifts but most important remembering gifts that have been given. Some of the best gifts in life can't be touched, tasted, smelled or heard! Even though these 4 senses don't register these gifts it doesn't mean they go unnoticed. Today is a good day to be grateful for so many of the gifts in life. As gifts are exchanged take time to ponder those gifts that are less tangible. One of these gifts that I am cherishing today is the many new friends that I have gained this year on KTC. Those of you who have lent a hand to me. Being nicotine free today is something that I had feared and thought was unobtainable a year ago. Quitting is a huge gift! A gift I give myself, a gift I share with my wife and a gift that so many of you have made possible and share. I think back to days when the pain of quitting actually caused me to break down and cry and want to abandon my quit. My wife was there and wanted to help but only other addicts knew this pain and knew it would pass. Thank You to all who have aided in my quit! Words can't express the gratitude I feel. :wub:
-
Christmas Day a time of giving and receiving gifts but most important remembering gifts that have been given. Some of the best gifts in life can't be touched, tasted, smelled or heard! Even though these 4 senses don't register these gifts it doesn't mean they go unnoticed. Today is a good day to be grateful for so many of the gifts in life. As gifts are exchanged take time to ponder those gifts that are less tangible. One of these gifts that I am cherishing today is the many new friends that I have gained this year on KTC. Those of you who have lent a hand to me. Being nicotine free today is something that I had feared and thought was unobtainable a year ago. Quitting is a huge gift! A gift I give myself, a gift I share with my wife and a gift that so many of you have made possible and share. I think back to days when the pain of quitting actually caused me to break down and cry and want to abandon my quit. My wife was there and wanted to help but only other addicts knew this pain and knew it would pass. Thank You to all who have aided in my quit! Words can't express the gratitude I feel. :wub:
Wade, you're a badass sir. Glad to be quit with you
'army'
-
Christmas Day a time of giving and receiving gifts but most important remembering gifts that have been given. Some of the best gifts in life can't be touched, tasted, smelled or heard! Even though these 4 senses don't register these gifts it doesn't mean they go unnoticed. Today is a good day to be grateful for so many of the gifts in life. As gifts are exchanged take time to ponder those gifts that are less tangible. One of these gifts that I am cherishing today is the many new friends that I have gained this year on KTC. Those of you who have lent a hand to me. Being nicotine free today is something that I had feared and thought was unobtainable a year ago. Quitting is a huge gift! A gift I give myself, a gift I share with my wife and a gift that so many of you have made possible and share. I think back to days when the pain of quitting actually caused me to break down and cry and want to abandon my quit. My wife was there and wanted to help but only other addicts knew this pain and knew it would pass. Thank You to all who have aided in my quit! Words can't express the gratitude I feel. :wub:
Wade, you're a badass sir. Glad to be quit with you
'army'
You have my eternal gratitude, Wade. My quit wouldn't be what it is without your words and example. Thanks, buddy.
-
Christmas Day a time of giving and receiving gifts but most important remembering gifts that have been given. Some of the best gifts in life can't be touched, tasted, smelled or heard! Even though these 4 senses don't register these gifts it doesn't mean they go unnoticed. Today is a good day to be grateful for so many of the gifts in life. As gifts are exchanged take time to ponder those gifts that are less tangible. One of these gifts that I am cherishing today is the many new friends that I have gained this year on KTC. Those of you who have lent a hand to me. Being nicotine free today is something that I had feared and thought was unobtainable a year ago. Quitting is a huge gift! A gift I give myself, a gift I share with my wife and a gift that so many of you have made possible and share. I think back to days when the pain of quitting actually caused me to break down and cry and want to abandon my quit. My wife was there and wanted to help but only other addicts knew this pain and knew it would pass. Thank You to all who have aided in my quit! Words can't express the gratitude I feel. :wub:
Wade, you're a badass sir. Glad to be quit with you
'army'
You have my eternal gratitude, Wade. My quit wouldn't be what it is without your words and example. Thanks, buddy.
Hats off Sir!!!
-
Christmas Day a time of giving and receiving gifts but most important remembering gifts that have been given. Some of the best gifts in life can't be touched, tasted, smelled or heard! Even though these 4 senses don't register these gifts it doesn't mean they go unnoticed. Today is a good day to be grateful for so many of the gifts in life. As gifts are exchanged take time to ponder those gifts that are less tangible. One of these gifts that I am cherishing today is the many new friends that I have gained this year on KTC. Those of you who have lent a hand to me. Being nicotine free today is something that I had feared and thought was unobtainable a year ago. Quitting is a huge gift! A gift I give myself, a gift I share with my wife and a gift that so many of you have made possible and share. I think back to days when the pain of quitting actually caused me to break down and cry and want to abandon my quit. My wife was there and wanted to help but only other addicts knew this pain and knew it would pass. Thank You to all who have aided in my quit! Words can't express the gratitude I feel. :wub:
Wade, you're a badass sir. Glad to be quit with you
'army'
You have my eternal gratitude, Wade. My quit wouldn't be what it is without your words and example. Thanks, buddy.
Hats off Sir!!!
ditto ! proud of you brother!!
-
Friends I had no intentions today of commenting on my quit but in the past hour events have me deeply concerned. It was 9 months ago today that I bid farewell to my "friend" Copenhagen. My life and my prospective of the future changed. I honestly don't know why this is the right time, but it is! The hundreds of other times may have had noble intentions but in reality I wasn't ready to quit. I've watched good men and women come here and with good intentions and forcefully declare their independence and freedom only to cave. A fellow addict, friend and quitter who is no longer a poster on KTC but has remained in contact with me, this morning reported the news he has fallen (caved). He expressed his hesitation to tell me, he didn't want to corrupt or weaken my quit. At first I didn't know how or what to think. Upon reflection I'm pissed! Not at my friend, but at the power nicotine addiction has on our pathetic minds. I know there are those that will yell from the highest points that the will never cave. I say beware those that get puffed up in their own pride fall the hardest. As a reminder to me I've bumped this earlier post of mine forward to remind myself of what it takes to be successful and stay quit. The basic and most important concept is:
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend, some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it canÂ’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME. One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 69 days) (276)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
-
Friends I had no intentions today of commenting on my quit but in the past hour events have me deeply concerned. It was 9 months ago today that I bid farewell to my "friend" Copenhagen. My life and my prospective of the future changed. I honestly don't know why this is the right time, but it is! The hundreds of other times may have had noble intentions but in reality I wasn't ready to quit. I've watched good men and women come here and with good intentions and forcefully declare their independence and freedom only to cave. A fellow addict, friend and quitter who is no longer a poster on KTC but has remained in contact with me, this morning reported the news he has fallen (caved). He expressed his hesitation to tell me, he didn't want to corrupt or weaken my quit. At first I didn't know how or what to think. Upon reflection I'm pissed! Not at my friend, but at the power nicotine addiction has on our pathetic minds. I know there are those that will yell from the highest points that the will never cave. I say beware those that get puffed up in their own pride fall the hardest. As a reminder to me I've bumped this earlier post of mine forward to remind myself of what it takes to be successful and stay quit. The basic and most important concept is:
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend, some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it canÂ’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME. One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 69 days) (276)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
Bumping this for everyone.
Post roll every day gents (and ladies). Don't stray from the site. Posting roll every day keeps me accountable. If you stray for weeks or months and run into that can at the store who is going to stop you from buying it? Do you think you're strong enough to do it without help?
Stay accountable folks, going back to slavery isn't worth it.
-
Friends I had no intentions today of commenting on my quit but in the past hour events have me deeply concerned. It was 9 months ago today that I bid farewell to my "friend" Copenhagen. My life and my prospective of the future changed. I honestly don't know why this is the right time, but it is! The hundreds of other times may have had noble intentions but in reality I wasn't ready to quit. I've watched good men and women come here and with good intentions and forcefully declare their independence and freedom only to cave. A fellow addict, friend and quitter who is no longer a poster on KTC but has remained in contact with me, this morning reported the news he has fallen (caved). He expressed his hesitation to tell me, he didn't want to corrupt or weaken my quit. At first I didn't know how or what to think. Upon reflection I'm pissed! Not at my friend, but at the power nicotine addiction has on our pathetic minds. I know there are those that will yell from the highest points that the will never cave. I say beware those that get puffed up in their own pride fall the hardest. As a reminder to me I've bumped this earlier post of mine forward to remind myself of what it takes to be successful and stay quit. The basic and most important concept is:
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.Â
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend, some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (I’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (I’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (I’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME. One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 69 days) (276)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
Bumping this for everyone.
Post roll every day gents (and ladies). Don't stray from the site. Posting roll every day keeps me accountable. If you stray for weeks or months and run into that can at the store who is going to stop you from buying it? Do you think you're strong enough to do it without help?
Stay accountable folks, going back to slavery isn't worth it.
Always always always one day at a time guys, it is sad but those who get comfy with their quit seem to stray but those who keep vigilant keep the quit!
We are all addicts and will always be addicts but we can stay active here and be quiters!
We win cause we choose to KEEP OUR WORD...one day at a time nothing more!
Quit on quiter!
-
Friends I had no intentions today of commenting on my quit but in the past hour events have me deeply concerned. It was 9 months ago today that I bid farewell to my "friend" Copenhagen. My life and my prospective of the future changed. I honestly don't know why this is the right time, but it is! The hundreds of other times may have had noble intentions but in reality I wasn't ready to quit. I've watched good men and women come here and with good intentions and forcefully declare their independence and freedom only to cave. A fellow addict, friend and quitter who is no longer a poster on KTC but has remained in contact with me, this morning reported the news he has fallen (caved). He expressed his hesitation to tell me, he didn't want to corrupt or weaken my quit. At first I didn't know how or what to think. Upon reflection I'm pissed! Not at my friend, but at the power nicotine addiction has on our pathetic minds. I know there are those that will yell from the highest points that the will never cave. I say beware those that get puffed up in their own pride fall the hardest. As a reminder to me I've bumped this earlier post of mine forward to remind myself of what it takes to be successful and stay quit. The basic and most important concept is:
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.Â
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend,  some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (I’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (I’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (I’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME.  One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 69 days) (276)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
Bumping this for everyone.
Post roll every day gents (and ladies). Don't stray from the site. Posting roll every day keeps me accountable. If you stray for weeks or months and run into that can at the store who is going to stop you from buying it? Do you think you're strong enough to do it without help?
Stay accountable folks, going back to slavery isn't worth it.
Always always always one day at a time guys, it is sad but those who get comfy with their quit seem to stray but those who keep vigilant keep the quit!
We are all addicts and will always be addicts but we can stay active here and be quiters!
We win cause we choose to KEEP OUR WORD...one day at a time nothing more!
Quit on quiter!
Great stuff Wade!
This addict is Quit with YOU and all quitters here, ONE day at a time and I became a quitter. ONE day at a time and I began to believe that I don't have to be a slave. One day at a time and YOU (wade) kept me accountable! Thank you Sir! 'bang head'
-
Friends I had no intentions today of commenting on my quit but in the past hour events have me deeply concerned. It was 9 months ago today that I bid farewell to my "friend" Copenhagen. My life and my prospective of the future changed. I honestly don't know why this is the right time, but it is! The hundreds of other times may have had noble intentions but in reality I wasn't ready to quit. I've watched good men and women come here and with good intentions and forcefully declare their independence and freedom only to cave. A fellow addict, friend and quitter who is no longer a poster on KTC but has remained in contact with me, this morning reported the news he has fallen (caved). He expressed his hesitation to tell me, he didn't want to corrupt or weaken my quit. At first I didn't know how or what to think. Upon reflection I'm pissed! Not at my friend, but at the power nicotine addiction has on our pathetic minds. I know there are those that will yell from the highest points that the will never cave. I say beware those that get puffed up in their own pride fall the hardest. As a reminder to me I've bumped this earlier post of mine forward to remind myself of what it takes to be successful and stay quit. The basic and most important concept is:
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.Â
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend,  some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (I’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (I’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (I’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME.  One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 69 days) (276)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
Bumping this for everyone.
Post roll every day gents (and ladies). Don't stray from the site. Posting roll every day keeps me accountable. If you stray for weeks or months and run into that can at the store who is going to stop you from buying it? Do you think you're strong enough to do it without help?
Stay accountable folks, going back to slavery isn't worth it.
Always always always one day at a time guys, it is sad but those who get comfy with their quit seem to stray but those who keep vigilant keep the quit!
We are all addicts and will always be addicts but we can stay active here and be quiters!
We win cause we choose to KEEP OUR WORD...one day at a time nothing more!
Quit on quiter!
Great stuff Wade!
This addict is Quit with YOU and all quitters here, ONE day at a time and I became a quitter. ONE day at a time and I began to believe that I don't have to be a slave. One day at a time and YOU (wade) kept me accountable! Thank you Sir! 'bang head'
There will always be people that fail Wade. It's part of this process. Just so happens that we're not in that group. we're in the group that enjoy's the freedom. we're in the group that will make it. I'll be right beside you the whole way.
-
Friends I had no intentions today of commenting on my quit but in the past hour events have me deeply concerned. It was 9 months ago today that I bid farewell to my "friend" Copenhagen. My life and my prospective of the future changed. I honestly don't know why this is the right time, but it is! The hundreds of other times may have had noble intentions but in reality I wasn't ready to quit. I've watched good men and women come here and with good intentions and forcefully declare their independence and freedom only to cave. A fellow addict, friend and quitter who is no longer a poster on KTC but has remained in contact with me, this morning reported the news he has fallen (caved). He expressed his hesitation to tell me, he didn't want to corrupt or weaken my quit. At first I didn't know how or what to think. Upon reflection I'm pissed! Not at my friend, but at the power nicotine addiction has on our pathetic minds. I know there are those that will yell from the highest points that the will never cave. I say beware those that get puffed up in their own pride fall the hardest. As a reminder to me I've bumped this earlier post of mine forward to remind myself of what it takes to be successful and stay quit. The basic and most important concept is:
ONE DAY (unit) AT A TIME!
What a simple concept, almost too simple to take serious until you think about it.Â
Life is about one day at a time. Each of our lives began as one day at a time. One word, one step, one friend,  some of the days were rewarding and successful others not so much. (I’ve been working on this one for 55 yrs)
Those of you that are married: marriage is one day at a time, some fun and rewarding others difficult and depressing. (IÂ’ve been working on this one for 32 yr)
Raising children: One exciting moment and success after another, stumbles and falls, ups and downs, happy days and really sad days. One sleepless night after another when they are newborn to one sleepless night after another when they are teens. (I’ve been working on this one for 31 yrs)
Addiction to NICOTINE: That happened one day (one pinch) at a time; I seriously doubt that any of you started dipping a full can a day. For me it was probably a small pinch every day or two, then a pinch a day, a pinch two or three times a day, Till I had the shit in my mouth literally 24/7. (I’ve been working on this one for nearly 40 yrs.)
QUIT: Why should our quit be any different? Simply stated it can’t be. Quitting our addiction to nicotine is a process, a long process, one day at a time. It may end up being one minute at a time when we first start the process. Remember ONE UNIT AT A TIME.  One day, one minute, one success, one triumph, one crave, one trigger, one cry, one rage , etc. (I’ve been working on this one for 69 days) (276)
When each day ends I will continue to examine how I preformed that day and how I can improve on it, when I report in the next day. This is the process of Life, Live it to your greatest potential and be proud of your accomplishments. I have got to say that I am proud of my quit and proud to be quit with each of you addicts. Because of my addiction I haven't allowed myself to be proud of much for a very long time.
Bumping this for everyone.
Post roll every day gents (and ladies). Don't stray from the site. Posting roll every day keeps me accountable. If you stray for weeks or months and run into that can at the store who is going to stop you from buying it? Do you think you're strong enough to do it without help?
Stay accountable folks, going back to slavery isn't worth it.
Always always always one day at a time guys, it is sad but those who get comfy with their quit seem to stray but those who keep vigilant keep the quit!
We are all addicts and will always be addicts but we can stay active here and be quiters!
We win cause we choose to KEEP OUR WORD...one day at a time nothing more!
Quit on quiter!
Great stuff Wade!
This addict is Quit with YOU and all quitters here, ONE day at a time and I became a quitter. ONE day at a time and I began to believe that I don't have to be a slave. One day at a time and YOU (wade) kept me accountable! Thank you Sir! 'bang head'
There will always be people that fail Wade. It's part of this process. Just so happens that we're not in that group. we're in the group that enjoy's the freedom. we're in the group that will make it. I'll be right beside you the whole way.
Isn't this a lot like life?
-
Quitters, this ole boy has been doing a lot of quit thinking lately. Some of my thoughts I want to document them here for my future reference. It seems to me that a good number of quitters have multiply issues to deal with. Many of us upon quitting have discovered that we either uncover underlining things we were hiding from or issues that were masked by the nicotine. I've been glad that I'm not alone in finding multiple issues to change in order to feel better about myself. My greatest, (outside KTC) aids in my quit has been, prescription AD's and herbal treatment suggested by my MD. My MD have been extremely helpful and supportive of my quit.
There is a time for everything! April 1, 2012 was the time for me to quit nicotine. November 1, 1979 was the time for me to give up alcohol. In the past 296 days I've left some past bad experiences and injuries behind. I had been using nicotine to hide from facing these events. Sometimes quitting nicotine makes us face issues before we are ready to face them. It's my opinion and experience that being forced like that leads to failure. Some caves I've been involved in or witnessed can be blamed on not being ready to face these side dishes of quit. Friends, even now it seems like almost weekly I find something that I must deal with that was avoided in the past by dipping. I know I've said this before, but, I have been helped by so many of you and your experiences. The only way I have to repay the debt I feel is to pay it forward to other quitters. Ill have another day of quit, how about joining me?
-
Quitters, this ole boy has been doing a lot of quit thinking lately. Some of my thoughts I want to document them here for my future reference. It seems to me that a good number of quitters have multiply issues to deal with. Many of us upon quitting have discovered that we either uncover underlining things we were hiding from or issues that were masked by the nicotine. I've been glad that I'm not alone in finding multiple issues to change in order to feel better about myself. My greatest, (outside KTC) aids in my quit has been, prescription AD's and herbal treatment suggested by my MD. My MD have been extremely helpful and supportive of my quit.
There is a time for everything! April 1, 2012 was the time for me to quit nicotine. November 1, 1979 was the time for me to give up alcohol. In the past 296 days I've left some past bad experiences and injuries behind. I had been using nicotine to hide from facing these events. Sometimes quitting nicotine makes us face issues before we are ready to face them. It's my opinion and experience that being forced like that leads to failure. Some caves I've been involved in or witnessed can be blamed on not being ready to face these side dishes of quit. Friends, even now it seems like almost weekly I find something that I must deal with that was avoided in the past by dipping. I know I've said this before, but, I have been helped by so many of you and your experiences. The only way I have to repay the debt I feel is to pay it forward to other quitters. Ill have another day of quit, how about joining me?
Nice WT! I want to take a second to say Thank YOU! I really appreciate that you reached out to me so early in my quit - I think your pm and meeting redtrain and a few others in chat my first real night here kept me here - thank you. keep up the good quit
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Yeah...I got nothing better to do, I'll have another day quit with you.
Beats death. I still got shit to live for too. Wouldn't mind walking my daughter down the isle (she's 7) , have a beer with my son someday (he's 9), or maybe even retire one day and have only golf and relaxing to do all day.
But for today, I am quit with you and every other mother fucker on this site. Any day that ends in "Y" is a good day to be quit.
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WT, you are a class act quitter. Like a lot of others, I'm sure, you reached out to me early on, too (so did a few others, which means this freaking website is a damn brotherhood.) Like Diesel, I got nothing better to do tonight. Might as well stay quit with you. Thanks for caring, about yourself and others.
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Quitters, this ole boy has been doing a lot of quit thinking lately. Some of my thoughts I want to document them here for my future reference. It seems to me that a good number of quitters have multiply issues to deal with. Many of us upon quitting have discovered that we either uncover underlining things we were hiding from or issues that were masked by the nicotine. I've been glad that I'm not alone in finding multiple issues to change in order to feel better about myself. My greatest, (outside KTC) aids in my quit has been, prescription AD's and herbal treatment suggested by my MD. My MD have been extremely helpful and supportive of my quit.
There is a time for everything! April 1, 2012 was the time for me to quit nicotine. November 1, 1979 was the time for me to give up alcohol. In the past 296 days I've left some past bad experiences and injuries behind. I had been using nicotine to hide from facing these events. Sometimes quitting nicotine makes us face issues before we are ready to face them. It's my opinion and experience that being forced like that leads to failure. Some caves I've been involved in or witnessed can be blamed on not being ready to face these side dishes of quit. Friends, even now it seems like almost weekly I find something that I must deal with that was avoided in the past by dipping. I know I've said this before, but, I have been helped by so many of you and your experiences. The only way I have to repay the debt I feel is to pay it forward to other quitters. Ill have another day of quit, how about joining me?
You helped with my quit! Day -7 and going strong! Thanks for paying it forward.
Wt57 is the man! I quit with you today brother.
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Quitters, this ole boy has been doing a lot of quit thinking lately. Some of my thoughts I want to document them here for my future reference. It seems to me that a good number of quitters have multiply issues to deal with. Many of us upon quitting have discovered that we either uncover underlining things we were hiding from or issues that were masked by the nicotine. I've been glad that I'm not alone in finding multiple issues to change in order to feel better about myself. My greatest, (outside KTC) aids in my quit has been, prescription AD's and herbal treatment suggested by my MD. My MD have been extremely helpful and supportive of my quit.Â
There is a time for everything! April 1, 2012 was the time for me to quit nicotine. November 1, 1979 was the time for me to give up alcohol. In the past 296 days I've left some past bad experiences and injuries behind. I had been using nicotine to hide from facing these events. Sometimes quitting nicotine makes us face issues before we are ready to face them. It's my opinion and experience that being forced like that leads to failure. Some caves I've been involved in or witnessed can be blamed on not being ready to face these side dishes of quit. Friends, even now it seems like almost weekly I find something that I must deal with that was avoided in the past by dipping. I know I've said this before, but, I have been helped by so many of you and your experiences. The only way I have to repay the debt I feel is to pay it forward to other quitters. Ill have another day of quit, how about joining me?
You helped with my quit! Day -7 and going strong! Thanks for paying it forward.
Wt57 is the man! I quit with you today brother.
Always quit with you brother!
Stay Strong, Focused Quit!
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Quitters, this ole boy has been doing a lot of quit thinking lately. Some of my thoughts I want to document them here for my future reference. It seems to me that a good number of quitters have multiply issues to deal with. Many of us upon quitting have discovered that we either uncover underlining things we were hiding from or issues that were masked by the nicotine. I've been glad that I'm not alone in finding multiple issues to change in order to feel better about myself. My greatest, (outside KTC) aids in my quit has been, prescription AD's and herbal treatment suggested by my MD. My MD have been extremely helpful and supportive of my quit.Â
There is a time for everything! April 1, 2012 was the time for me to quit nicotine. November 1, 1979 was the time for me to give up alcohol. In the past 296 days I've left some past bad experiences and injuries behind. I had been using nicotine to hide from facing these events. Sometimes quitting nicotine makes us face issues before we are ready to face them. It's my opinion and experience that being forced like that leads to failure. Some caves I've been involved in or witnessed can be blamed on not being ready to face these side dishes of quit. Friends, even now it seems like almost weekly I find something that I must deal with that was avoided in the past by dipping. I know I've said this before, but, I have been helped by so many of you and your experiences. The only way I have to repay the debt I feel is to pay it forward to other quitters. Ill have another day of quit, how about joining me?
You helped with my quit! Day -7 and going strong! Thanks for paying it forward.
Wt57 is the man! I quit with you today brother.
Always quit with you brother!
Stay Strong, Focused Quit!
'worship'
Perfectly said.
We deflect a lot of our emotions, problems, issues into a cancerous weed because it "feels good" momentarily. Little do we realize that walking away and ignoring our issues is what leads to our these issues owning us.
I've learned here that I have to face my problems head on. It's true for the quit, and it's true for my life.
Fuck slavery.
I'll take free any day.
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Comrades, I am so humbled this night to be counted as a quitter with each of you. 300 nights ago I sat on the floor by the toilet and cried as I dumped my last 3 cans of Copenhagen into the bowl and flushed it. The next morning I woke up and wrote this:
This is probably the most I will ever have to say, believe it or not I'm a really quiet guy, kind of Introverted.
'crackup' I haven't shut up since!
Every morning, usually very early I have joined my Brothers of Quit in making a promise to stay nicotine free. Every night, I've shown back up to check on my friends. Along this journey we have lost a number of quitters that started strong and caved to the deceit of the false promises of nicotine addiction. Some of these addicts are still among my friends and I still text them from time to time to be there when their strength grows. None of us can stand to watch a cave but I hope I've always separated the cave from the caver because I've been that weak assed addict for going on 40 years.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven..
My season to quit took many years to arrive. That night 302 days ago that I was lead to KTC, I knew it was my time. It took me 2 nights to cave to the pressure of overwhelming feeling of that time to quit had arrived. 'qt'
This past month has been a very interesting part of my quit, with numerous lessons and feelings. I had a fellow addict that i had quit with daily for 250 days made a conscious decision to cave. I was deeply hurt, I took it personal for awhile. I realize I control 1 quit, mine!
One post that hit me was by Mthomas, on Shame of an addict. (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=93&st=90). I still haven't fully absorbed this concept but recognize it so well.
The another epic post Oral Surgeon Visit Today, By CDaniels (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=7796) that reminds us all of the blessings we have and the vulnerabilities we have.
Now I take that step onto the third floor with humility and pride. I recognize each milestone I've reached couldn't have happened without so many of you. I also remember the terrible pain I've suffered in quitting. The detox and withdrawal was definitely painful and sucked but that pain was minimal when compared to letting go of some of the life experiences that l hid from in my addiction. Even the past 3 days I've recognized another element of my life that has been and is holding me back. So many of us have found we had to change aspects of our lives we never associated with our addiction. My most recent discovery is the most painful yet and I'm not sure I'm ready to face it but I will continue to quit everyday and eventually I can work on accepting other changes.
Thanks to everyone and again today I quit with each and everyone of you that are committing to quit today.
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Congrats on 300. Your "friend" who caved is weak. You are not. You can't quit for them.
Quit on.
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Well said. I am humbled to be with you on my journey.
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Congrats on 300. Your "friend" who caved is weak. You are not. You can't quit for them.
Quit on.
'clap'
Couldn't agree more.
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Congrats on the 3rd floor. Smell the roses, you've earned it and their are more to bloom in the future.
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Just popping in to say congrats, love you like a brother, and hope I get to shake your hand sometime soon.
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Just popping in to say congrats, love you like a brother, and hope I get to shake your hand sometime soon.
What's up Wedge??!!!! Hope all is well with you and your family. Thanks again for bringing me back to this site. You have no clue how much I appreciate it. Hell you might have saved my life.
Next time you're having a rough day just think..."Son of a bitch, I may have saved some dude named Diesel' life." Might not make your day better, but certainly couldn't make it any worse.
Oh, and if you do get to shake WT's hand...wear a glove. LOL!!!
Take care and stay quit.
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Just popping in to say congrats, love you like a brother, and hope I get to shake your hand sometime soon.
What's up Wedge??!!!! Hope all is well with you and your family. Thanks again for bringing me back to this site. You have no clue how much I appreciate it. Hell you might have saved my life.
Next time you're having a rough day just think..."Son of a bitch, I may have saved some dude named Diesel' life." Might not make your day better, but certainly couldn't make it any worse.
Oh, and if you do get to shake WT's hand...wear a glove. LOL!!!
Take care and stay quit.
Standing O Diesel.
Supporters reading this should think this. I hope all of us know that we have brothers that helped us and that we helped.
If you don't think so, get involved more. In battles and bonding times with brothers, I have become a better quitter and a better man.
Those that punch me in the mouth, those that picked me up when I was down, those that opened my eyes when I was blind to my actions....
THANK YOU FOR SAVING MY LIFE. My marriage, my responsibilities, my faith in goodness.
You all impacted and still impact me. Learning how to quit is just a model for improving many facets of my life and how to live better.
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Comrades, I am so humbled this night to be counted as a quitter with each of you. 300 nights ago I sat on the floor by the toilet and cried as I dumped my last 3 cans of Copenhagen into the bowl and flushed it. The next morning I woke up and wrote this:
This is probably the most I will ever have to say, believe it or not I'm a really quiet guy, kind of Introverted.
'crackup' I haven't shut up since!
Every morning, usually very early I have joined my Brothers of Quit in making a promise to stay nicotine free. Every night, I've shown back up to check on my friends. Along this journey we have lost a number of quitters that started strong and caved to the deceit of the false promises of nicotine addiction. Some of these addicts are still among my friends and I still text them from time to time to be there when their strength grows. None of us can stand to watch a cave but I hope I've always separated the cave from the caver because I've been that weak assed addict for going on 40 years.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven..
My season to quit took many years to arrive. That night 302 days ago that I was lead to KTC, I knew it was my time. It took me 2 nights to cave to the pressure of overwhelming feeling of that time to quit had arrived. 'qt'
This past month has been a very interesting part of my quit, with numerous lessons and feelings. I had a fellow addict that i had quit with daily for 250 days made a conscious decision to cave. I was deeply hurt, I took it personal for awhile. I realize I control 1 quit, mine!
One post that hit me was by Mthomas, on Shame of an addict. (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=93&st=90). I still haven't fully absorbed this concept but recognize it so well.
The another epic post Oral Surgeon Visit Today, By CDaniels (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=7796) that reminds us all of the blessings we have and the vulnerabilities we have.
Now I take that step onto the third floor with humility and pride. I recognize each milestone I've reached couldn't have happened without so many of you. I also remember the terrible pain I've suffered in quitting. The detox and withdrawal was definitely painful and sucked but that pain was minimal when compared to letting go of some of the life experiences that l hid from in my addiction. Even the past 3 days I've recognized another element of my life that has been and is holding me back. So many of us have found we had to change aspects of our lives we never associated with our addiction. My most recent discovery is the most painful yet and I'm not sure I'm ready to face it but I will continue to quit everyday and eventually I can work on accepting other changes.
Thanks to everyone and again today I quit with each and everyone of you that are committing to quit today.
Wade- congrats brother on the third floor, keep blazing that trail one day at a time. Hold off on the oral for awhile and you have it watch those male prostitutes in Vegas bro, they're not as clean as the ones at home.
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Quiet and introverted....that's funny right there.
'crackup'
Good stuff WT, congrats on 300.
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Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
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Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
I hear ya and have had similiar issues, my best way to deal with the void is to get fully vested into all of my kids activities. This has been quite a good way to not get into bad habits or let caves mess with my head, I also have become a bit more of a planner as far as planning on vacation planning on getting back into fishing this spring a lot more!
Stay strong brother and you got this!
Grizzly25...out
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I know I am not a VET but here is my two cents. WT i know that you are one fine quitter on here I have seen where you have helped lots of people. I think you have in a sence filled that hole with helping others in their quits on here. You may not see that right now but if you take a breath and step back and look you will see. Thank you for your strong quit brother.
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Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Hey Wade, I know you're WAY further down this road than I am...but, I wanted to let you know that I know exactly what you're talking about with the HUGE hole left by nicotine. I share the same feelings with that and fears of what other vice may try to work its way into the open slot. I wish I had some magical advice to offer you that would help you fill that hole. But, sadly I don't. It's surprising...and incredibly sad...to me how big a part of my life that bullshit was. I really, at times, feel like a close friend has died.
I think cdaniels hit the nail on the head, Wade. You were one of the first people on here to reach out to me with support. Your encouragement that first week or two made a huge difference in my quit and you are one of the main people I would hate to disappoint if I caved now. Being the quiet and introverted person that you are ( 'no' ), you maybe don't see the difference you've made around here or the number of people's quits you've strengthened...but you are, without a doubt, one of the major players here. Maybe that is what you're filling the hole with...? Thanks again for everything and drop me a line if you want to talk. Take care Buddy!
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Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Hey Wade, I know you're WAY further down this road than I am...but, I wanted to let you know that I know exactly what you're talking about with the HUGE hole left by nicotine. I share the same feelings with that and fears of what other vice may try to work its way into the open slot. I wish I had some magical advice to offer you that would help you fill that hole. But, sadly I don't. It's surprising...and incredibly sad...to me how big a part of my life that bullshit was. I really, at times, feel like a close friend has died.
I think cdaniels hit the nail on the head, Wade. You were one of the first people on here to reach out to me with support. Your encouragement that first week or two made a huge difference in my quit and you are one of the main people I would hate to disappoint if I caved now. Being the quiet and introverted person that you are ( 'no' ), you maybe don't see the difference you've made around here or the number of people's quits you've strengthened...but you are, without a doubt, one of the major players here. Maybe that is what you're filling the hole with...? Thanks again for everything and drop me a line if you want to talk. Take care Buddy!
So no vets have responded yet, but I would like to offer my thoughts on this also. Like the others have mentioned, this site and the help you provide others is a great void filler.
You are correct about being cautious of other 'vices'. As addicts we are all susceptible to other addictions. Everything in moderation is something most addicts have trouble with. The trick is to find a good addiction. Reading, writing, exercise, meditation, wood working, charity work, there are plenty of choices, and with the money you are saving not killing yourself with nicotine you should have a little cash to start something new.
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Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Don't worry you'll still get craves too 'bang head'
I've been craving like a mofo for the past week. No idea why, it just came on suddenly. Good thing I still have some hooch around, been chewing that again.
I filled my void with extra crappy food and now I have to diet again. It's going well, I'm down 6 pounds in the past 2 weeks. Slow and steady wins the race.
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Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Don't worry you'll still get craves too 'bang head'
I've been craving like a mofo for the past week. No idea why, it just came on suddenly. Good thing I still have some hooch around, been chewing that again.
I filled my void with extra crappy food and now I have to diet again. It's going well, I'm down 6 pounds in the past 2 weeks. Slow and steady wins the race.
Have to agree with Kubrick. I am following the both of you and every once in ahwile I get that wave of asking myself "What that F*ck as I could go for one right now". But I always turn to Hooch, the big bag of seeds and in 30 minutes the wave passes.
Wt - for me I have taken up a few projects. Of course #1 is losing the weight so have been exercising more, even the little stuff as just got one of those bicycle pedals that people use for rehab. I think it works well when I am not on a chair with wheels. #2 is I find myself reading more often, just picking up a new book or my new kindle fire to enjoy. And #3 my big project for the next couple of months is putting all of the audio cassettes that the wife and I have onto CD's. Mainly to save the space here but wow I never remembered how much good stuff I had....
I guess what I am saying is try to pick something like a new hobby that you like to do in order to fill that void.
And am glad and honored to stand beside you in this day to day fight.
-
Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Don't worry you'll still get craves too 'bang head'
I've been craving like a mofo for the past week. No idea why, it just came on suddenly. Good thing I still have some hooch around, been chewing that again.
I filled my void with extra crappy food and now I have to diet again. It's going well, I'm down 6 pounds in the past 2 weeks. Slow and steady wins the race.
Have to agree with Kubrick. I am following the both of you and every once in ahwile I get that wave of asking myself "What that F*ck as I could go for one right now". But I always turn to Hooch, the big bag of seeds and in 30 minutes the wave passes.
Wt - for me I have taken up a few projects. Of course #1 is losing the weight so have been exercising more, even the little stuff as just got one of those bicycle pedals that people use for rehab. I think it works well when I am not on a chair with wheels. #2 is I find myself reading more often, just picking up a new book or my new kindle fire to enjoy. And #3 my big project for the next couple of months is putting all of the audio cassettes that the wife and I have onto CD's. Mainly to save the space here but wow I never remembered how much good stuff I had....
I guess what I am saying is try to pick something like a new hobby that you like to do in order to fill that void.
And am glad and honored to stand beside you in this day to day fight.
I know what you are feeling Wt. That crap used to be such a big part of our lives. For me, it was almost like I couldn't function without it. I know that I am still discovering new strengths everyday though. I think that will never stop. It is truly amazing to realize how strong we really are.
Concerning the hole you see in your life now, I feel that too sometimes. What I try to do is, and I say try, because I still have trouble keeping motivated, is to just try new things and make each day count. There are all sorts of new things that I think I would have never experienced had I still been using chewing tobacco. Really, that stuff was holding us back. I say we fill that hole in our lives with new experiences each. Make these days count, because we never get them back. Keep up the badass quitting and sorry for the rant.
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Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Don't worry you'll still get craves too 'bang head'
I've been craving like a mofo for the past week. No idea why, it just came on suddenly. Good thing I still have some hooch around, been chewing that again.
I filled my void with extra crappy food and now I have to diet again. It's going well, I'm down 6 pounds in the past 2 weeks. Slow and steady wins the race.
Have to agree with Kubrick. I am following the both of you and every once in ahwile I get that wave of asking myself "What that F*ck as I could go for one right now". But I always turn to Hooch, the big bag of seeds and in 30 minutes the wave passes.
Wt - for me I have taken up a few projects. Of course #1 is losing the weight so have been exercising more, even the little stuff as just got one of those bicycle pedals that people use for rehab. I think it works well when I am not on a chair with wheels. #2 is I find myself reading more often, just picking up a new book or my new kindle fire to enjoy. And #3 my big project for the next couple of months is putting all of the audio cassettes that the wife and I have onto CD's. Mainly to save the space here but wow I never remembered how much good stuff I had....
I guess what I am saying is try to pick something like a new hobby that you like to do in order to fill that void.
And am glad and honored to stand beside you in this day to day fight.
I know what you are feeling Wt. That crap used to be such a big part of our lives. For me, it was almost like I couldn't function without it. I know that I am still discovering new strengths everyday though. I think that will never stop. It is truly amazing to realize how strong we really are.
Concerning the hole you see in your life now, I feel that too sometimes. What I try to do is, and I say try, because I still have trouble keeping motivated, is to just try new things and make each day count. There are all sorts of new things that I think I would have never experienced had I still been using chewing tobacco. Really, that stuff was holding us back. I say we fill that hole in our lives with new experiences each. Make these days count, because we never get them back. Keep up the badass quitting and sorry for the rant.
Wt57, You're now a different person without the nic. You can now dive deeper into what you're already doing: family, job, friends, voluteering, whatever floats your boat. Without nic, we are more alive, more in tune with reality. Fill the hole with "more" of who you really are. If the hole is too big, then fill it with daily unselfish acts.
Cheers brother! 'bang head'
-
Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Don't worry you'll still get craves too 'bang head'
I've been craving like a mofo for the past week. No idea why, it just came on suddenly. Good thing I still have some hooch around, been chewing that again.
I filled my void with extra crappy food and now I have to diet again. It's going well, I'm down 6 pounds in the past 2 weeks. Slow and steady wins the race.
Have to agree with Kubrick. I am following the both of you and every once in ahwile I get that wave of asking myself "What that F*ck as I could go for one right now". But I always turn to Hooch, the big bag of seeds and in 30 minutes the wave passes.
Wt - for me I have taken up a few projects. Of course #1 is losing the weight so have been exercising more, even the little stuff as just got one of those bicycle pedals that people use for rehab. I think it works well when I am not on a chair with wheels. #2 is I find myself reading more often, just picking up a new book or my new kindle fire to enjoy. And #3 my big project for the next couple of months is putting all of the audio cassettes that the wife and I have onto CD's. Mainly to save the space here but wow I never remembered how much good stuff I had....
I guess what I am saying is try to pick something like a new hobby that you like to do in order to fill that void.
And am glad and honored to stand beside you in this day to day fight.
I know what you are feeling Wt. That crap used to be such a big part of our lives. For me, it was almost like I couldn't function without it. I know that I am still discovering new strengths everyday though. I think that will never stop. It is truly amazing to realize how strong we really are.
Concerning the hole you see in your life now, I feel that too sometimes. What I try to do is, and I say try, because I still have trouble keeping motivated, is to just try new things and make each day count. There are all sorts of new things that I think I would have never experienced had I still been using chewing tobacco. Really, that stuff was holding us back. I say we fill that hole in our lives with new experiences each. Make these days count, because we never get them back. Keep up the badass quitting and sorry for the rant.
Wt57, You're now a different person without the nic. You can now dive deeper into what you're already doing: family, job, friends, voluteering, whatever floats your boat. Without nic, we are more alive, more in tune with reality. Fill the hole with "more" of who you really are. If the hole is too big, then fill it with daily unselfish acts.
Cheers brother! 'bang head'
For what it is worth WT. I haven't had cravings since the day 80s, but I do continue to have the "hole" or that "somethings missing" issue. I remain active on this site to remind myself of my quit commitment daily, not because I'm craving like a mofo.
For folks like you and I that have chewed for more than 1/2 our lives, there is no before picture. We never were tobaco-free functioning adults before, we started getting chemically altered when we were kids.
Try some new things, do the things you love more. I'm guessing we will reach an equilibrium after a couple more years of quit. This is just a guess, I figure it takes time to re-wire my brain chemically after that many years of abuse.
-
Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Don't worry you'll still get craves too 'bang head'
I've been craving like a mofo for the past week. No idea why, it just came on suddenly. Good thing I still have some hooch around, been chewing that again.
I filled my void with extra crappy food and now I have to diet again. It's going well, I'm down 6 pounds in the past 2 weeks. Slow and steady wins the race.
Have to agree with Kubrick. I am following the both of you and every once in ahwile I get that wave of asking myself "What that F*ck as I could go for one right now". But I always turn to Hooch, the big bag of seeds and in 30 minutes the wave passes.
Wt - for me I have taken up a few projects. Of course #1 is losing the weight so have been exercising more, even the little stuff as just got one of those bicycle pedals that people use for rehab. I think it works well when I am not on a chair with wheels. #2 is I find myself reading more often, just picking up a new book or my new kindle fire to enjoy. And #3 my big project for the next couple of months is putting all of the audio cassettes that the wife and I have onto CD's. Mainly to save the space here but wow I never remembered how much good stuff I had....
I guess what I am saying is try to pick something like a new hobby that you like to do in order to fill that void.
And am glad and honored to stand beside you in this day to day fight.
I know what you are feeling Wt. That crap used to be such a big part of our lives. For me, it was almost like I couldn't function without it. I know that I am still discovering new strengths everyday though. I think that will never stop. It is truly amazing to realize how strong we really are.
Concerning the hole you see in your life now, I feel that too sometimes. What I try to do is, and I say try, because I still have trouble keeping motivated, is to just try new things and make each day count. There are all sorts of new things that I think I would have never experienced had I still been using chewing tobacco. Really, that stuff was holding us back. I say we fill that hole in our lives with new experiences each. Make these days count, because we never get them back. Keep up the badass quitting and sorry for the rant.
Wt57, You're now a different person without the nic. You can now dive deeper into what you're already doing: family, job, friends, voluteering, whatever floats your boat. Without nic, we are more alive, more in tune with reality. Fill the hole with "more" of who you really are. If the hole is too big, then fill it with daily unselfish acts.
Cheers brother! 'bang head'
For what it is worth WT. I haven't had cravings since the day 80s, but I do continue to have the "hole" or that "somethings missing" issue. I remain active on this site to remind myself of my quit commitment daily, not because I'm craving like a mofo.
For folks like you and I that have chewed for more than 1/2 our lives, there is no before picture. We never were tobaco-free functioning adults before, we started getting chemically altered when we were kids.
Try some new things, do the things you love more. I'm guessing we will reach an equilibrium after a couple more years of quit. This is just a guess, I figure it takes time to re-wire my brain chemically after that many years of abuse.
Yesterday i craved something fierce.. If I had fake I would've used it. I was real close to grabbing the coffee can.. I haven't had any craves in months, and this one sucked. maybe because I've been thinking about the 6 mo mark? I feel the emptiness as well. some days more than others. You're not alone, and we'll get through this together. Today's a new day, and I'm quit.
179-0 the bitch can kiss my ass..
-
I had a long discussion with my wife about the loss I feel. I believe KTC filled that void early in quitting, but as our quits become more secure KTC does less to fill that void. Some of the activities I've been using are: exercise (I didn't gain quitting but was fat to begin with), sex (for decades I passed up intimacy with my wife to spend time dipping). T-Cell hit on an important point. 3/4 of my life and all of my adult life has been RULED by nicotine!
I appreciate all the thoughts.
Stepping back into my cave I found this post, basically the same subject.
Time to move on
My friend Mark has helped me see that I had much more than nicotine to give up! At a time when the nic bitch was placing those thoughts of doubt into my head and I had been dwelling on the past and feeling sorry for myself, my friend said "quit crying over spilled milk". Well last night I reevaluated my life, the things that I was using as excuses to chew, the thing that were hang-ups slowing my advancing in life and things that I have allowed to make me depressed. I took these people and thing that were holding me back and figuratively flushed them down the same toilet which I had flushed those last 3 cans of chew down 25 days ago. Now I can go forward and my weaknesses are going to become my strengths. I will rely on God, myself and you my quit friends, to move on. I'm here to give you a hand when you are weak, and will come to you when I'm weak. This is such a simple concept.
.
Now it's time to move on and learn to live--
-
Seasoned quitters I have a question. I haven't had a crave in many weeks. I have had some minor ups and downs (funks). Haven't really thought about long term quitting, pretty much I've accepted the fact that I'm in this for the long term of quitting 1 day at a time. Now my dilemma: I feel a loss. That portion of my life that ruled for 40 years is gone and has left a huge hole in my life. How do we replace that loss? I've had problems with other vises and am very frightened that one of the other less savory activities may replace my nicotine use if I'm not very cautious. I would guess that this is not unusual but I haven't seen a lot about it. Sure we have seen many of us that after making progress on nicotine find we have other issues we have a desire to quit or cut back on. I feel like a little boy that lost his security blanket and can't seem to replace it. (It feels like I had that blanket till high school and I'm too old to trade it for a tricycle). I suspect that this loss and failure to fill it is the cause of many caves. Damn it seems hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Don't worry you'll still get craves too 'bang head'
I've been craving like a mofo for the past week. No idea why, it just came on suddenly. Good thing I still have some hooch around, been chewing that again.
I filled my void with extra crappy food and now I have to diet again. It's going well, I'm down 6 pounds in the past 2 weeks. Slow and steady wins the race.
Have to agree with Kubrick. I am following the both of you and every once in ahwile I get that wave of asking myself "What that F*ck as I could go for one right now". But I always turn to Hooch, the big bag of seeds and in 30 minutes the wave passes.
Wt - for me I have taken up a few projects. Of course #1 is losing the weight so have been exercising more, even the little stuff as just got one of those bicycle pedals that people use for rehab. I think it works well when I am not on a chair with wheels. #2 is I find myself reading more often, just picking up a new book or my new kindle fire to enjoy. And #3 my big project for the next couple of months is putting all of the audio cassettes that the wife and I have onto CD's. Mainly to save the space here but wow I never remembered how much good stuff I had....
I guess what I am saying is try to pick something like a new hobby that you like to do in order to fill that void.
And am glad and honored to stand beside you in this day to day fight.
I know what you are feeling Wt. That crap used to be such a big part of our lives. For me, it was almost like I couldn't function without it. I know that I am still discovering new strengths everyday though. I think that will never stop. It is truly amazing to realize how strong we really are.
Concerning the hole you see in your life now, I feel that too sometimes. What I try to do is, and I say try, because I still have trouble keeping motivated, is to just try new things and make each day count. There are all sorts of new things that I think I would have never experienced had I still been using chewing tobacco. Really, that stuff was holding us back. I say we fill that hole in our lives with new experiences each. Make these days count, because we never get them back. Keep up the badass quitting and sorry for the rant.
Wt57, You're now a different person without the nic. You can now dive deeper into what you're already doing: family, job, friends, voluteering, whatever floats your boat. Without nic, we are more alive, more in tune with reality. Fill the hole with "more" of who you really are. If the hole is too big, then fill it with daily unselfish acts.
Cheers brother! 'bang head'
For what it is worth WT. I haven't had cravings since the day 80s, but I do continue to have the "hole" or that "somethings missing" issue. I remain active on this site to remind myself of my quit commitment daily, not because I'm craving like a mofo.
For folks like you and I that have chewed for more than 1/2 our lives, there is no before picture. We never were tobaco-free functioning adults before, we started getting chemically altered when we were kids.
Try some new things, do the things you love more. I'm guessing we will reach an equilibrium after a couple more years of quit. This is just a guess, I figure it takes time to re-wire my brain chemically after that many years of abuse.
Yesterday i craved something fierce.. If I had fake I would've used it. I was real close to grabbing the coffee can.. I haven't had any craves in months, and this one sucked. maybe because I've been thinking about the 6 mo mark? I feel the emptiness as well. some days more than others. You're not alone, and we'll get through this together. Today's a new day, and I'm quit.
179-0 the bitch can kiss my ass..
This stuff is EXACTLY what I need to read today, and is helping me to stay quit on my 36th day. I'm so glad you are posting about these aspects of chewing cessation.
-
I had a long discussion with my wife about the loss I feel. I believe KTC filled that void early in quitting, but as our quits become more secure KTC does less to fill that void. Some of the activities I've been using are: exercise (I didn't gain quitting but was fat to begin with), sex (for decades I passed up intimacy with my wife to spend time dipping). T-Cell hit on an important point. 3/4 of my life and all of my adult life has been RULED by nicotine!
I appreciate all the thoughts.
You will not slip into vices.
You control your actions like you control your quit.
That void you feel can be filled with hundreds of thousands of things you've always wanted to do in your life. Remember when just thinking "I want to be quit" seemed like a pipe dream, but now look at you. You are a badass motherfucker of quit, and you do what you want to do. You control this. Not us. Not some cancer weed. You.
I'm very proud of you. Very proud.
-
I had a long discussion with my wife about the loss I feel. I believe KTC filled that void early in quitting, but as our quits become more secure KTC does less to fill that void. Some of the activities I've been using are: exercise (I didn't gain quitting but was fat to begin with), sex (for decades I passed up intimacy with my wife to spend time dipping). T-Cell hit on an important point. 3/4 of my life and all of my adult life has been RULED by nicotine!
I appreciate all the thoughts.
Stepping back into my cave I found this post, basically the same subject.
Time to move on
My friend Mark has helped me see that I had much more than nicotine to give up! At a time when the nic bitch was placing those thoughts of doubt into my head and I had been dwelling on the past and feeling sorry for myself, my friend said "quit crying over spilled milk". Well last night I reevaluated my life, the things that I was using as excuses to chew, the thing that were hang-ups slowing my advancing in life and things that I have allowed to make me depressed. I took these people and thing that were holding me back and figuratively flushed them down the same toilet which I had flushed those last 3 cans of chew down 25 days ago. Now I can go forward and my weaknesses are going to become my strengths. I will rely on God, myself and you my quit friends, to move on. I'm here to give you a hand when you are weak, and will come to you when I'm weak. This is such a simple concept.
This may sound childish and stupid but I will share it anyway.
Ever since I quit I felt this void at night after the kids were in bed or when I was home by myself.
I bought myself a tablet...a kindle fire to be exact. The think has been a life saver. I read books on it, play stupid little games on it either by myself or against others on line, listen to music, look up plays and drill for my youth basketball team, etc...
I cannot tell you how many games of pool I shot on that thing, or how many games of words with friends, or Song Pop I have played. I also actually read a few books, I've never been a book guy.
Point is I used to look forward to sneaking out and getting a dip in. Now I look forward to playing doodle jump, hill climb racing, bubble blast, etc.
Again, not sure if this will help you but maybe it will give you a good chuckle?
-
I had a long discussion with my wife about the loss I feel. I believe KTC filled that void early in quitting, but as our quits become more secure KTC does less to fill that void. Some of the activities I've been using are: exercise (I didn't gain quitting but was fat to begin with), sex (for decades I passed up intimacy with my wife to spend time dipping). T-Cell hit on an important point. 3/4 of my life and all of my adult life has been RULED by nicotine!
I appreciate all the thoughts.Â
Stepping back into my cave I found this post, basically the same subject.
Time to move on
My friend Mark has helped me see that I had much more than nicotine to give up! At a time when the nic bitch was placing those thoughts of doubt into my head and I had been dwelling on the past and feeling sorry for myself, my friend said "quit crying over spilled milk". Well last night I reevaluated my life, the things that I was using as excuses to chew, the thing that were hang-ups slowing my advancing in life and things that I have allowed to make me depressed. I took these people and thing that were holding me back and figuratively flushed them down the same toilet which I had flushed those last 3 cans of chew down 25 days ago. Now I can go forward and my weaknesses are going to become my strengths. I will rely on God, myself and you my quit friends, to move on. I'm here to give you a hand when you are weak, and will come to you when I'm weak. This is such a simple concept.
This may sound childish and stupid but I will share it anyway.
Ever since I quit I felt this void at night after the kids were in bed or when I was home by myself.
I bought myself a tablet...a kindle fire to be exact. The think has been a life saver. I read books on it, play stupid little games on it either by myself or against others on line, listen to music, look up plays and drill for my youth basketball team, etc...
I cannot tell you how many games of pool I shot on that thing, or how many games of words with friends, or Song Pop I have played. I also actually read a few books, I've never been a book guy.
Point is I used to look forward to sneaking out and getting a dip in. Now I look forward to playing doodle jump, hill climb racing, bubble blast, etc.
Again, not sure if this will help you but maybe it will give you a good chuckle?
Wt57,
You can reach a lot of your personal goals...just like you "became" quit. You see, change is not an event, it is a process. Little steps and we can proceed to our goals.
You are a badass quitter and YOU know this. I don't care what you weigh, what education you don't have or where the fuck you live. You my friend have INSPIRED me with your posts. When I see Wt57 I see quit woodie all the way.
Now, we decided to take this path. We know it is a great path for us. Get on the path, stay on the path so I can find my way! 'bang head'
-
I had a long discussion with my wife about the loss I feel. I believe KTC filled that void early in quitting, but as our quits become more secure KTC does less to fill that void. Some of the activities I've been using are: exercise (I didn't gain quitting but was fat to begin with), sex (for decades I passed up intimacy with my wife to spend time dipping). T-Cell hit on an important point. 3/4 of my life and all of my adult life has been RULED by nicotine!
I appreciate all the thoughts.Â
Stepping back into my cave I found this post, basically the same subject.
Time to move on
My friend Mark has helped me see that I had much more than nicotine to give up! At a time when the nic bitch was placing those thoughts of doubt into my head and I had been dwelling on the past and feeling sorry for myself, my friend said "quit crying over spilled milk". Well last night I reevaluated my life, the things that I was using as excuses to chew, the thing that were hang-ups slowing my advancing in life and things that I have allowed to make me depressed. I took these people and thing that were holding me back and figuratively flushed them down the same toilet which I had flushed those last 3 cans of chew down 25 days ago. Now I can go forward and my weaknesses are going to become my strengths. I will rely on God, myself and you my quit friends, to move on. I'm here to give you a hand when you are weak, and will come to you when I'm weak. This is such a simple concept.
This may sound childish and stupid but I will share it anyway.
Ever since I quit I felt this void at night after the kids were in bed or when I was home by myself.
I bought myself a tablet...a kindle fire to be exact. The think has been a life saver. I read books on it, play stupid little games on it either by myself or against others on line, listen to music, look up plays and drill for my youth basketball team, etc...
I cannot tell you how many games of pool I shot on that thing, or how many games of words with friends, or Song Pop I have played. I also actually read a few books, I've never been a book guy.
Point is I used to look forward to sneaking out and getting a dip in. Now I look forward to playing doodle jump, hill climb racing, bubble blast, etc.
Again, not sure if this will help you but maybe it will give you a good chuckle?
Wt57,
You can reach a lot of your personal goals...just like you "became" quit. You see, change is not an event, it is a process. Little steps and we can proceed to our goals.
You are a badass quitter and YOU know this. I don't care what you weigh, what education you don't have or where the fuck you live. You my friend have INSPIRED me with your posts. When I see Wt57 I see quit woodie all the way.
Now, we decided to take this path. We know it is a great path for us. Get on the path, stay on the path so I can find my way! 'bang head'
What 30 said X 2. Since we are similar age I have read your posts and taken your advice to heart. You have a impact on others who don't always give back input. Thank you.
-
Tonight I had one of those ah-ha moments! While reading the post from 'Bencodie' in which he describes his plan to tapper off before quitting. That was my plan. Well that was a bullshit addict tactic of postponing a quit till a reason to continue came along. We all used the various methods of keeping a hold on our addiction.
Now my ah-ha moment! (I'm slow). I approach every vise and aspect in my life that I need to tackle (in order to move on) in this same flawed manner. I'm not sure if it is a way of hanging on, avoidance, fear of change or fear of failure. I spend time analyzing and planning but never get around to actually doing it.
DO IT!
Damn that's what I did on April 1, 12. I quit nicotine. Everyday I repeat. Now it's time to "do it" to other things!
"JUST DO IT"
-
(I'm slow).
.....happens with old age....
-
(I'm slow).
.....happens with old age....
Just wait!
-
(I'm slow).
.....happens with old age....
Just wait!
'tease' shocker
-
(I'm slow).
.....happens with old age....
Just wait!
'tease' shocker
KA-POW.....WT....in the house....its called MASSIVE ACTION....
Nothing starts without a decision my brother......
LOVE THIS
-
(I'm slow).
.....happens with old age....
Just wait!
'tease' shocker
KA-POW.....WT....in the house....its called MASSIVE ACTION....
Nothing starts without a decision my brother......
LOVE THIS
Roam!
Stop picking on Wade. He has a tractor to drive and you have a truck to go break down. Besides, we don't know how much more his ticker can take.
:P
-
(I'm slow).
.....happens with old age....
Just wait!
'tease' shocker
KA-POW.....WT....in the house....its called MASSIVE ACTION....
Nothing starts without a decision my brother......
LOVE THIS
Roam!
Stop picking on Wade. He has a tractor to drive and you have a truck to go break down. Besides, we don't know how much more his ticker can take.
:P
Wedge, is it just me or does your name sometimes read "Wedgie" and other times "Wedge"? I hope so, or I'm losing it like people WT's age...
-
I had a long discussion with my wife about the loss I feel. I believe KTC filled that void early in quitting, but as our quits become more secure KTC does less to fill that void. Some of the activities I've been using are: exercise (I didn't gain quitting but was fat to begin with), sex (for decades I passed up intimacy with my wife to spend time dipping). T-Cell hit on an important point. 3/4 of my life and all of my adult life has been RULED by nicotine!
I appreciate all the thoughts.Â
Stepping back into my cave I found this post, basically the same subject.
Time to move on
My friend Mark has helped me see that I had much more than nicotine to give up! At a time when the nic bitch was placing those thoughts of doubt into my head and I had been dwelling on the past and feeling sorry for myself, my friend said "quit crying over spilled milk". Well last night I reevaluated my life, the things that I was using as excuses to chew, the thing that were hang-ups slowing my advancing in life and things that I have allowed to make me depressed. I took these people and thing that were holding me back and figuratively flushed them down the same toilet which I had flushed those last 3 cans of chew down 25 days ago. Now I can go forward and my weaknesses are going to become my strengths. I will rely on God, myself and you my quit friends, to move on. I'm here to give you a hand when you are weak, and will come to you when I'm weak. This is such a simple concept.
This may sound childish and stupid but I will share it anyway.
Ever since I quit I felt this void at night after the kids were in bed or when I was home by myself.
I bought myself a tablet...a kindle fire to be exact. The think has been a life saver. I read books on it, play stupid little games on it either by myself or against others on line, listen to music, look up plays and drill for my youth basketball team, etc...
I cannot tell you how many games of pool I shot on that thing, or how many games of words with friends, or Song Pop I have played. I also actually read a few books, I've never been a book guy.
Point is I used to look forward to sneaking out and getting a dip in. Now I look forward to playing doodle jump, hill climb racing, bubble blast, etc.
Again, not sure if this will help you but maybe it will give you a good chuckle?
Wt57,
You can reach a lot of your personal goals...just like you "became" quit. You see, change is not an event, it is a process. Little steps and we can proceed to our goals.
You are a badass quitter and YOU know this. I don't care what you weigh, what education you don't have or where the fuck you live. You my friend have INSPIRED me with your posts. When I see Wt57 I see quit woodie all the way.
Now, we decided to take this path. We know it is a great path for us. Get on the path, stay on the path so I can find my way! 'bang head'
What 30 said X 2. Since we are similar age I have read your posts and taken your advice to heart. You have a impact on others who don't always give back input. Thank you.
The amount of honesty, wisdom and common sense in this group is helping my quit and good for my soul.
-
Yesterday was a day I've desired for decades! I honestly believe it will be the turning point in my quit and my life. How could one event be so dramatic and important? Well I've carried some burdens in my life that for me were deep secrets that I hid at all expense. Not wanting to accept, admit or even think about my secrets I went from one addiction to another to hide the pain and avoid facing reality. After about 150 days I began to hurt, I no longer had my cover! I really didn't even know what was wrong because of the 40 years of addiction had me tricked, I wasn't even sure what I was running or hiding from anymore. I talked about the void I felt and not knowing how to fill it. For the past 170 days or so I've been going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. During my first weeks of quit I had shared some things that i had held as secrets with a councilor and felt liberated, freed. So for the past 3 weeks I've been jotting down notes in my personal notes on my control panel account summary page. I started writing like I was writing to a friend explaining what I've been feeling. I had a lot of pain laid out in my letter to my imaginary friend.
Two days ago I decided to share some of my thoughts and fears in quitting with a fellow quitter here at KTC. The personal messages went back and forth and the more we shared our experiences quitting the more comfortable I got sharing extremely personal experiences which lead to my exposing my burdens and came as a relief that I no longer am hiding my secrets. I'm not sure where I'm going from here but I do know it is forward. I do know that the giant hole I've felt since quitting shrunk to a small hole that is within my ability to deal with.
The brotherhood of KTC is a phenomenal experience. I've spent my life avoiding people and going into my seclusion to ninja dip. For the past 320 days I've gone out of my comfort zone and been open about things I've never considered talking to anyone about. I don't know if I've been a lot of help to others (I hope I have) but I have definitely become a much different person than I was when I started. I never expected all the added benefits I'm enjoying by being part of this group. Thank you to everyone, and drink up the koolaid is so so satisfying!
-
Yesterday was a day I've desired for decades! I honestly believe it will be the turning point in my quit and my life. How could one event be so dramatic and important? Well I've carried some burdens in my life that for me were deep secrets that I hid at all expense. Not wanting to accept, admit or even think about my secrets I went from one addiction to another to hide the pain and avoid facing reality. After about 150 days I began to hurt, I no longer had my cover! I really didn't even know what was wrong because of the 40 years of addiction had me tricked, I wasn't even sure what I was running or hiding from anymore. I talked about the void I felt and not knowing how to fill it. For the past 170 days or so I've been going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. During my first weeks of quit I had shared some things that i had held as secrets with a councilor and felt liberated, freed. So for the past 3 weeks I've been jotting down notes in my personal notes on my control panel account summary page. I started writing like I was writing to a friend explaining what I've been feeling. I had a lot of pain laid out in my letter to my imaginary friend.
Two days ago I decided to share some of my thoughts and fears in quitting with a fellow quitter here at KTC. The personal messages went back and forth and the more we shared our experiences quitting the more comfortable I got sharing extremely personal experiences which lead to my exposing my burdens and came as a relief that I no longer am hiding my secrets. I'm not sure where I'm going from here but I do know it is forward. I do know that the giant hole I've felt since quitting shrunk to a small hole that is within my ability to deal with.
The brotherhood of KTC is a phenomenal experience. I've spent my life avoiding people and going into my seclusion to ninja dip. For the past 320 days I've gone out of my comfort zone and been open about things I've never considered talking to anyone about. I don't know if I've been a lot of help to others (I hope I have) but I have definitely become a much different person than I was when I started. I never expected all the added benefits I'm enjoying by being part of this group. Thank you to everyone, and drink up the koolaid is so so satisfying!
It's posts like this that bring a tear to my eye, and a new strengthening to my quit as I see people just like me having the life changing experience as we quit.
proud to be right there, side by side with you in this fight.
'worship'
-
Yesterday was a day I've desired for decades! I honestly believe it will be the turning point in my quit and my life. How could one event be so dramatic and important? Well I've carried some burdens in my life that for me were deep secrets that I hid at all expense. Not wanting to accept, admit or even think about my secrets I went from one addiction to another to hide the pain and avoid facing reality. After about 150 days I began to hurt, I no longer had my cover! I really didn't even know what was wrong because of the 40 years of addiction had me tricked, I wasn't even sure what I was running or hiding from anymore. I talked about the void I felt and not knowing how to fill it. For the past 170 days or so I've been going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. During my first weeks of quit I had shared some things that i had held as secrets with a councilor and felt liberated, freed. So for the past 3 weeks I've been jotting down notes in my personal notes on my control panel account summary page. I started writing like I was writing to a friend explaining what I've been feeling. I had a lot of pain laid out in my letter to my imaginary friend.
Two days ago I decided to share some of my thoughts and fears in quitting with a fellow quitter here at KTC. The personal messages went back and forth and the more we shared our experiences quitting the more comfortable I got sharing extremely personal experiences which lead to my exposing my burdens and came as a relief that I no longer am hiding my secrets. I'm not sure where I'm going from here but I do know it is forward. I do know that the giant hole I've felt since quitting shrunk to a small hole that is within my ability to deal with.
The brotherhood of KTC is a phenomenal experience. I've spent my life avoiding people and going into my seclusion to ninja dip. For the past 320 days I've gone out of my comfort zone and been open about things I've never considered talking to anyone about. I don't know if I've been a lot of help to others (I hope I have) but I have definitely become a much different person than I was when I started. I never expected all the added benefits I'm enjoying by being part of this group. Thank you to everyone, and drink up the koolaid is so so satisfying!
Get out of my head, wt!!! Dammit that sounds so much like me. I'm still getting used to that feeling of moments when I don't need to carry those burdens anymore. It's really astounding to me how one vice seems to make other parts of your life worse, and if not worse, at least more uncomfortable. You're ten times further along in your quit than I am, and you're admitting that it has taken that long to shed those burdens. As hard as it is to quit, I think it's just as hard to get rid of those burdens. Even bigger than that, for me anyway, is forgiveness. Somebody on April's roll yesterday said they looked forward to the freedom that came from forgiving themselves. That is a burden I still feel today. But I'm getting there. Thanks for the post and the honesty, wt.
And yes, you have helped people on here. I'm one of them. I find myself reading everything you write on here. You are very introspective and that really helps those of us that analyze the hell out of everything, most importantly ourselves.
You rock, old man.
-
Yesterday was a day I've desired for decades! I honestly believe it will be the turning point in my quit and my life. How could one event be so dramatic and important? Well I've carried some burdens in my life that for me were deep secrets that I hid at all expense. Not wanting to accept, admit or even think about my secrets I went from one addiction to another to hide the pain and avoid facing reality. After about 150 days I began to hurt, I no longer had my cover! I really didn't even know what was wrong because of the 40 years of addiction had me tricked, I wasn't even sure what I was running or hiding from anymore. I talked about the void I felt and not knowing how to fill it. For the past 170 days or so I've been going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. During my first weeks of quit I had shared some things that i had held as secrets with a councilor and felt liberated, freed. So for the past 3 weeks I've been jotting down notes in my personal notes on my control panel account summary page. I started writing like I was writing to a friend explaining what I've been feeling. I had a lot of pain laid out in my letter to my imaginary friend.Â
Two days ago I decided to share some of my thoughts and fears in quitting with a fellow quitter here at KTC. The personal messages went back and forth and the more we shared our experiences quitting the more comfortable I got sharing extremely personal experiences which lead to my exposing my burdens and came as a relief that I no longer am hiding my secrets. I'm not sure where I'm going from here but I do know it is forward. I do know that the giant hole I've felt since quitting shrunk to a small hole that is within my ability to deal with.
The brotherhood of KTC is a phenomenal experience. I've spent my life avoiding people and going into my seclusion to ninja dip. For the past 320 days I've gone out of my comfort zone and been open about things I've never considered talking to anyone about. I don't know if I've been a lot of help to others (I hope I have) but I have definitely become a much different person than I was when I started. I never expected all the added benefits I'm enjoying by being part of this group. Thank you to everyone, and drink up the koolaid is so so satisfying!
Get out of my head, wt!!! Dammit that sounds so much like me. I'm still getting used to that feeling of moments when I don't need to carry those burdens anymore. It's really astounding to me how one vice seems to make other parts of your life worse, and if not worse, at least more uncomfortable. You're ten times further along in your quit than I am, and you're admitting that it has taken that long to shed those burdens. As hard as it is to quit, I think it's just as hard to get rid of those burdens. Even bigger than that, for me anyway, is forgiveness. Somebody on April's roll yesterday said they looked forward to the freedom that came from forgiving themselves. That is a burden I still feel today. But I'm getting there. Thanks for the post and the honesty, wt.
And yes, you have helped people on here. I'm one of them. I find myself reading everything you write on here. You are very introspective and that really helps those of us that analyze the hell out of everything, most importantly ourselves.
You rock, old man.
WT....I Love you man.....
you know that....
PEACE
-
Yesterday was a day I've desired for decades! I honestly believe it will be the turning point in my quit and my life. How could one event be so dramatic and important? Well I've carried some burdens in my life that for me were deep secrets that I hid at all expense. Not wanting to accept, admit or even think about my secrets I went from one addiction to another to hide the pain and avoid facing reality. After about 150 days I began to hurt, I no longer had my cover! I really didn't even know what was wrong because of the 40 years of addiction had me tricked, I wasn't even sure what I was running or hiding from anymore. I talked about the void I felt and not knowing how to fill it. For the past 170 days or so I've been going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. During my first weeks of quit I had shared some things that i had held as secrets with a councilor and felt liberated, freed. So for the past 3 weeks I've been jotting down notes in my personal notes on my control panel account summary page. I started writing like I was writing to a friend explaining what I've been feeling. I had a lot of pain laid out in my letter to my imaginary friend.Â
Two days ago I decided to share some of my thoughts and fears in quitting with a fellow quitter here at KTC. The personal messages went back and forth and the more we shared our experiences quitting the more comfortable I got sharing extremely personal experiences which lead to my exposing my burdens and came as a relief that I no longer am hiding my secrets. I'm not sure where I'm going from here but I do know it is forward. I do know that the giant hole I've felt since quitting shrunk to a small hole that is within my ability to deal with.
The brotherhood of KTC is a phenomenal experience. I've spent my life avoiding people and going into my seclusion to ninja dip. For the past 320 days I've gone out of my comfort zone and been open about things I've never considered talking to anyone about. I don't know if I've been a lot of help to others (I hope I have) but I have definitely become a much different person than I was when I started. I never expected all the added benefits I'm enjoying by being part of this group. Thank you to everyone, and drink up the koolaid is so so satisfying!
Get out of my head, wt!!! Dammit that sounds so much like me. I'm still getting used to that feeling of moments when I don't need to carry those burdens anymore. It's really astounding to me how one vice seems to make other parts of your life worse, and if not worse, at least more uncomfortable. You're ten times further along in your quit than I am, and you're admitting that it has taken that long to shed those burdens. As hard as it is to quit, I think it's just as hard to get rid of those burdens. Even bigger than that, for me anyway, is forgiveness. Somebody on April's roll yesterday said they looked forward to the freedom that came from forgiving themselves. That is a burden I still feel today. But I'm getting there. Thanks for the post and the honesty, wt.
And yes, you have helped people on here. I'm one of them. I find myself reading everything you write on here. You are very introspective and that really helps those of us that analyze the hell out of everything, most importantly ourselves.
You rock, old man.
WT....I Love you man.....
you know that....
PEACE
I can tell you that you have been instrumental in my quit. I always appreciate the texts and posts. I'm glad that you have gained a lot from this website, and it is pushing you to move forward. Great job WT!!!
-
Yesterday was a day I've desired for decades! I honestly believe it will be the turning point in my quit and my life. How could one event be so dramatic and important? Well I've carried some burdens in my life that for me were deep secrets that I hid at all expense. Not wanting to accept, admit or even think about my secrets I went from one addiction to another to hide the pain and avoid facing reality. After about 150 days I began to hurt, I no longer had my cover! I really didn't even know what was wrong because of the 40 years of addiction had me tricked, I wasn't even sure what I was running or hiding from anymore. I talked about the void I felt and not knowing how to fill it. For the past 170 days or so I've been going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. During my first weeks of quit I had shared some things that i had held as secrets with a councilor and felt liberated, freed. So for the past 3 weeks I've been jotting down notes in my personal notes on my control panel account summary page. I started writing like I was writing to a friend explaining what I've been feeling. I had a lot of pain laid out in my letter to my imaginary friend.Â
Two days ago I decided to share some of my thoughts and fears in quitting with a fellow quitter here at KTC. The personal messages went back and forth and the more we shared our experiences quitting the more comfortable I got sharing extremely personal experiences which lead to my exposing my burdens and came as a relief that I no longer am hiding my secrets. I'm not sure where I'm going from here but I do know it is forward. I do know that the giant hole I've felt since quitting shrunk to a small hole that is within my ability to deal with.
The brotherhood of KTC is a phenomenal experience. I've spent my life avoiding people and going into my seclusion to ninja dip. For the past 320 days I've gone out of my comfort zone and been open about things I've never considered talking to anyone about. I don't know if I've been a lot of help to others (I hope I have) but I have definitely become a much different person than I was when I started. I never expected all the added benefits I'm enjoying by being part of this group. Thank you to everyone, and drink up the koolaid is so so satisfying!
Get out of my head, wt!!! Dammit that sounds so much like me. I'm still getting used to that feeling of moments when I don't need to carry those burdens anymore. It's really astounding to me how one vice seems to make other parts of your life worse, and if not worse, at least more uncomfortable. You're ten times further along in your quit than I am, and you're admitting that it has taken that long to shed those burdens. As hard as it is to quit, I think it's just as hard to get rid of those burdens. Even bigger than that, for me anyway, is forgiveness. Somebody on April's roll yesterday said they looked forward to the freedom that came from forgiving themselves. That is a burden I still feel today. But I'm getting there. Thanks for the post and the honesty, wt.
And yes, you have helped people on here. I'm one of them. I find myself reading everything you write on here. You are very introspective and that really helps those of us that analyze the hell out of everything, most importantly ourselves.
You rock, old man.
WT....I Love you man.....
you know that....
PEACE
I can tell you that you have been instrumental in my quit. I always appreciate the texts and posts. I'm glad that you have gained a lot from this website, and it is pushing you to move forward. Great job WT!!!
Nice work WT. Congratulations man. Hard work to find who you are is worth it. We're all walking a path together.
-
Yesterday was a day I've desired for decades! I honestly believe it will be the turning point in my quit and my life. How could one event be so dramatic and important? Well I've carried some burdens in my life that for me were deep secrets that I hid at all expense. Not wanting to accept, admit or even think about my secrets I went from one addiction to another to hide the pain and avoid facing reality. After about 150 days I began to hurt, I no longer had my cover! I really didn't even know what was wrong because of the 40 years of addiction had me tricked, I wasn't even sure what I was running or hiding from anymore. I talked about the void I felt and not knowing how to fill it. For the past 170 days or so I've been going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. During my first weeks of quit I had shared some things that i had held as secrets with a councilor and felt liberated, freed. So for the past 3 weeks I've been jotting down notes in my personal notes on my control panel account summary page. I started writing like I was writing to a friend explaining what I've been feeling. I had a lot of pain laid out in my letter to my imaginary friend.Â
Two days ago I decided to share some of my thoughts and fears in quitting with a fellow quitter here at KTC. The personal messages went back and forth and the more we shared our experiences quitting the more comfortable I got sharing extremely personal experiences which lead to my exposing my burdens and came as a relief that I no longer am hiding my secrets. I'm not sure where I'm going from here but I do know it is forward. I do know that the giant hole I've felt since quitting shrunk to a small hole that is within my ability to deal with.
The brotherhood of KTC is a phenomenal experience. I've spent my life avoiding people and going into my seclusion to ninja dip. For the past 320 days I've gone out of my comfort zone and been open about things I've never considered talking to anyone about. I don't know if I've been a lot of help to others (I hope I have) but I have definitely become a much different person than I was when I started. I never expected all the added benefits I'm enjoying by being part of this group. Thank you to everyone, and drink up the koolaid is so so satisfying!
Get out of my head, wt!!! Dammit that sounds so much like me. I'm still getting used to that feeling of moments when I don't need to carry those burdens anymore. It's really astounding to me how one vice seems to make other parts of your life worse, and if not worse, at least more uncomfortable. You're ten times further along in your quit than I am, and you're admitting that it has taken that long to shed those burdens. As hard as it is to quit, I think it's just as hard to get rid of those burdens. Even bigger than that, for me anyway, is forgiveness. Somebody on April's roll yesterday said they looked forward to the freedom that came from forgiving themselves. That is a burden I still feel today. But I'm getting there. Thanks for the post and the honesty, wt.
And yes, you have helped people on here. I'm one of them. I find myself reading everything you write on here. You are very introspective and that really helps those of us that analyze the hell out of everything, most importantly ourselves.
You rock, old man.
WT....I Love you man.....
you know that....
PEACE
I can tell you that you have been instrumental in my quit. I always appreciate the texts and posts. I'm glad that you have gained a lot from this website, and it is pushing you to move forward. Great job WT!!!
Nice work WT. Congratulations man. Hard work to find who you are is worth it. We're all walking a path together.
Great stuff brother!!
Keep inspiring those who believed they were once uninspirable!
-
Yesterday was a day I've desired for decades! I honestly believe it will be the turning point in my quit and my life. How could one event be so dramatic and important? Well I've carried some burdens in my life that for me were deep secrets that I hid at all expense. Not wanting to accept, admit or even think about my secrets I went from one addiction to another to hide the pain and avoid facing reality. After about 150 days I began to hurt, I no longer had my cover! I really didn't even know what was wrong because of the 40 years of addiction had me tricked, I wasn't even sure what I was running or hiding from anymore. I talked about the void I felt and not knowing how to fill it. For the past 170 days or so I've been going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. During my first weeks of quit I had shared some things that i had held as secrets with a councilor and felt liberated, freed. So for the past 3 weeks I've been jotting down notes in my personal notes on my control panel account summary page. I started writing like I was writing to a friend explaining what I've been feeling. I had a lot of pain laid out in my letter to my imaginary friend.Â
Two days ago I decided to share some of my thoughts and fears in quitting with a fellow quitter here at KTC. The personal messages went back and forth and the more we shared our experiences quitting the more comfortable I got sharing extremely personal experiences which lead to my exposing my burdens and came as a relief that I no longer am hiding my secrets. I'm not sure where I'm going from here but I do know it is forward. I do know that the giant hole I've felt since quitting shrunk to a small hole that is within my ability to deal with.
The brotherhood of KTC is a phenomenal experience. I've spent my life avoiding people and going into my seclusion to ninja dip. For the past 320 days I've gone out of my comfort zone and been open about things I've never considered talking to anyone about. I don't know if I've been a lot of help to others (I hope I have) but I have definitely become a much different person than I was when I started. I never expected all the added benefits I'm enjoying by being part of this group. Thank you to everyone, and drink up the koolaid is so so satisfying!
Get out of my head, wt!!! Dammit that sounds so much like me. I'm still getting used to that feeling of moments when I don't need to carry those burdens anymore. It's really astounding to me how one vice seems to make other parts of your life worse, and if not worse, at least more uncomfortable. You're ten times further along in your quit than I am, and you're admitting that it has taken that long to shed those burdens. As hard as it is to quit, I think it's just as hard to get rid of those burdens. Even bigger than that, for me anyway, is forgiveness. Somebody on April's roll yesterday said they looked forward to the freedom that came from forgiving themselves. That is a burden I still feel today. But I'm getting there. Thanks for the post and the honesty, wt.
And yes, you have helped people on here. I'm one of them. I find myself reading everything you write on here. You are very introspective and that really helps those of us that analyze the hell out of everything, most importantly ourselves.
You rock, old man.
WT....I Love you man.....
you know that....
PEACE
I can tell you that you have been instrumental in my quit. I always appreciate the texts and posts. I'm glad that you have gained a lot from this website, and it is pushing you to move forward. Great job WT!!!
Nice work WT. Congratulations man. Hard work to find who you are is worth it. We're all walking a path together.
Great stuff brother!!
Keep inspiring those who believed they were once uninspirable!
Way to go WT! Quit porn right there!
-
Yesterday was a day I've desired for decades! I honestly believe it will be the turning point in my quit and my life. How could one event be so dramatic and important? Well I've carried some burdens in my life that for me were deep secrets that I hid at all expense. Not wanting to accept, admit or even think about my secrets I went from one addiction to another to hide the pain and avoid facing reality. After about 150 days I began to hurt, I no longer had my cover! I really didn't even know what was wrong because of the 40 years of addiction had me tricked, I wasn't even sure what I was running or hiding from anymore. I talked about the void I felt and not knowing how to fill it. For the past 170 days or so I've been going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. During my first weeks of quit I had shared some things that i had held as secrets with a councilor and felt liberated, freed. So for the past 3 weeks I've been jotting down notes in my personal notes on my control panel account summary page. I started writing like I was writing to a friend explaining what I've been feeling. I had a lot of pain laid out in my letter to my imaginary friend.Â
Two days ago I decided to share some of my thoughts and fears in quitting with a fellow quitter here at KTC. The personal messages went back and forth and the more we shared our experiences quitting the more comfortable I got sharing extremely personal experiences which lead to my exposing my burdens and came as a relief that I no longer am hiding my secrets. I'm not sure where I'm going from here but I do know it is forward. I do know that the giant hole I've felt since quitting shrunk to a small hole that is within my ability to deal with.
The brotherhood of KTC is a phenomenal experience. I've spent my life avoiding people and going into my seclusion to ninja dip. For the past 320 days I've gone out of my comfort zone and been open about things I've never considered talking to anyone about. I don't know if I've been a lot of help to others (I hope I have) but I have definitely become a much different person than I was when I started. I never expected all the added benefits I'm enjoying by being part of this group. Thank you to everyone, and drink up the koolaid is so so satisfying!
Get out of my head, wt!!! Dammit that sounds so much like me. I'm still getting used to that feeling of moments when I don't need to carry those burdens anymore. It's really astounding to me how one vice seems to make other parts of your life worse, and if not worse, at least more uncomfortable. You're ten times further along in your quit than I am, and you're admitting that it has taken that long to shed those burdens. As hard as it is to quit, I think it's just as hard to get rid of those burdens. Even bigger than that, for me anyway, is forgiveness. Somebody on April's roll yesterday said they looked forward to the freedom that came from forgiving themselves. That is a burden I still feel today. But I'm getting there. Thanks for the post and the honesty, wt.
And yes, you have helped people on here. I'm one of them. I find myself reading everything you write on here. You are very introspective and that really helps those of us that analyze the hell out of everything, most importantly ourselves.
You rock, old man.
WT....I Love you man.....
you know that....
PEACE
I can tell you that you have been instrumental in my quit. I always appreciate the texts and posts. I'm glad that you have gained a lot from this website, and it is pushing you to move forward. Great job WT!!!
Nice work WT. Congratulations man. Hard work to find who you are is worth it. We're all walking a path together.
Great stuff brother!!
Keep inspiring those who believed they were once uninspirable!
Way to go WT! Quit porn right there!
This is good shit right hey'ah. You don't know me from Adam, WT, but I follow you. You have presence here. You have power here. When I see those two kids in the avatar I want to read what's posted. I respect what you say. You're someone we look too for guidance. I admire you WT. Keep doing what you're doing because it means something to me. Thank you.
-
Yesterday was a day I've desired for decades! I honestly believe it will be the turning point in my quit and my life. How could one event be so dramatic and important? Well I've carried some burdens in my life that for me were deep secrets that I hid at all expense. Not wanting to accept, admit or even think about my secrets I went from one addiction to another to hide the pain and avoid facing reality. After about 150 days I began to hurt, I no longer had my cover! I really didn't even know what was wrong because of the 40 years of addiction had me tricked, I wasn't even sure what I was running or hiding from anymore. I talked about the void I felt and not knowing how to fill it. For the past 170 days or so I've been going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. During my first weeks of quit I had shared some things that i had held as secrets with a councilor and felt liberated, freed. So for the past 3 weeks I've been jotting down notes in my personal notes on my control panel account summary page. I started writing like I was writing to a friend explaining what I've been feeling. I had a lot of pain laid out in my letter to my imaginary friend.Â
Two days ago I decided to share some of my thoughts and fears in quitting with a fellow quitter here at KTC. The personal messages went back and forth and the more we shared our experiences quitting the more comfortable I got sharing extremely personal experiences which lead to my exposing my burdens and came as a relief that I no longer am hiding my secrets. I'm not sure where I'm going from here but I do know it is forward. I do know that the giant hole I've felt since quitting shrunk to a small hole that is within my ability to deal with.
The brotherhood of KTC is a phenomenal experience. I've spent my life avoiding people and going into my seclusion to ninja dip. For the past 320 days I've gone out of my comfort zone and been open about things I've never considered talking to anyone about. I don't know if I've been a lot of help to others (I hope I have) but I have definitely become a much different person than I was when I started. I never expected all the added benefits I'm enjoying by being part of this group. Thank you to everyone, and drink up the koolaid is so so satisfying!
Get out of my head, wt!!! Dammit that sounds so much like me. I'm still getting used to that feeling of moments when I don't need to carry those burdens anymore. It's really astounding to me how one vice seems to make other parts of your life worse, and if not worse, at least more uncomfortable. You're ten times further along in your quit than I am, and you're admitting that it has taken that long to shed those burdens. As hard as it is to quit, I think it's just as hard to get rid of those burdens. Even bigger than that, for me anyway, is forgiveness. Somebody on April's roll yesterday said they looked forward to the freedom that came from forgiving themselves. That is a burden I still feel today. But I'm getting there. Thanks for the post and the honesty, wt.
And yes, you have helped people on here. I'm one of them. I find myself reading everything you write on here. You are very introspective and that really helps those of us that analyze the hell out of everything, most importantly ourselves.
You rock, old man.
WT....I Love you man.....
you know that....
PEACE
I can tell you that you have been instrumental in my quit. I always appreciate the texts and posts. I'm glad that you have gained a lot from this website, and it is pushing you to move forward. Great job WT!!!
Nice work WT. Congratulations man. Hard work to find who you are is worth it. We're all walking a path together.
Great stuff brother!!
Keep inspiring those who believed they were once uninspirable!
Way to go WT! Quit porn right there!
This is good shit right hey'ah. You don't know me from Adam, WT, but I follow you. You have presence here. You have power here. When I see those two kids in the avatar I want to read what's posted. I respect what you say. You're someone we look too for guidance. I admire you WT. Keep doing what you're doing because it means something to me. Thank you.
WT is a mother fucking QUIT ROCK GOD......bring it BITCH.....
POWWWWW
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Just one more!
Just one more what? Yesterday I had a newbie that was dwelling on wanting one more dip! Why? 'Crazy' why would anyone who's gone through the pain of the first couple of weeks want to throw that away? Two main things come to mind: 1. We are addicts and 2. We've fooled ourselves that it would be easier to quit than it is. (Reality is it sucks)
I'm choosing today: Just One More! that's right, One More Day Of Freedom!. I'm extending my hand of support, join me.
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Just one more!
Just one more what? Yesterday I had a newbie that was dwelling on wanting one more dip! Why? 'Crazy' why would anyone who's gone through the pain of the first couple of weeks want to throw that away? Two main things come to mind: 1. We are addicts and 2. We've fooled ourselves that it would be easier to quit than it is. (Reality is it sucks)
I'm choosing today: Just One More! that's right, One More Day Of Freedom!. I'm extending my hand of support, join me.
I will join you WT, you are in inspiration to many of us. I won't hold your hand in public, but I am with you!
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Just one more!
Just one more what? Yesterday I had a newbie that was dwelling on wanting one more dip! Why? 'Crazy' why would anyone who's gone through the pain of the first couple of weeks want to throw that away? Two main things come to mind: 1. We are addicts and 2. We've fooled ourselves that it would be easier to quit than it is. (Reality is it sucks)
I'm choosing today: Just One More! that's right, One More Day Of Freedom!. I'm extending my hand of support, join me.
I will join you WT, you are in inspiration to many of us. I won't hold your hand in public, but I am with you!
One more day of awesome quitness!
One more day of Freedom from the can!
One more day where we badass quiters win!
One more day where big tobacco loses!
Quit on Quiters one awesome day at a time!
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Nice job Wt
(you're listed as 1 year today - I went into July and see that's off by a few days, still - nice work you do here!)
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Thanks to everyone for your support that got me to today, day 365!
I layed down and had a nap this afternoon, what happened? "Dip dream!" This wasn't the first by any means but this was the most vivid and my list if feelings upon discovering I had caved were something like this: extreme disappointment in myself, embarrassment for letting my brothers down, question; (had I posted roll today), how can I hide my folly, no one needs to know, I just as well have another, how can I face my wife ( she surprised me this morning with a 1 year celebration card this morning). While planning my deception the phone rang and I woke up. Damn it I'm still such an addict! How sad we ever introduced this evil substance into our bodies but how great it is that we found the keys to quit and stay quit! I guess that this was a timely reminder that I'm still that addict. I'd been having thoughts that I didn't need a daily promise.
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Thanks to everyone for your support that got me to today, day 365!
I layed down and had a nap this afternoon, what happened? "Dip dream!" This wasn't the first by any means but this was the most vivid and my list if feelings upon discovering I had caved were something like this: extreme disappointment in myself, embarrassment for letting my brothers down, question; (had I posted roll today), how can I hide my folly, no one needs to know, I just as well have another, how can I face my wife ( she surprised me this morning with a 1 year celebration card this morning). While planning my deception the phone rang and I woke up. Damn it I'm still such an addict! How sad we ever introduced this evil substance into our bodies but how great it is that we found the keys to quit and stay quit! I guess that this was a timely reminder that I'm still that addict. I'd been having thoughts that I didn't need a daily promise.
well done and congrats my friend 'clap'
and keep it going for many more +1
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Congrats on a year MT!!!
You're a bad man. Ktc is lucky to have you.
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Wt57 day 1 no April fool joke I've paced the floor all night I quit!!! 38 yr of slavery I'm here for the long haul.
Almost one year to the hour, I'm up contemplating what 1 year quit means. Friends and fellow addicts each of us come to that point in our lives that we want control more than we want nicotine. I never understood this. I always thought I could live my life of lies and pretend that I had control, I didn't. The lies got harder to conceal and like any liar lies were told to cover lies till my web was so massive I was constantly caught in my own web.
''Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive''
Not only has this year been a time to learn to live life nicotine free, but I'm learning to be honest to myself and others. Being able to have so many of you to reach out to in a time of need and receive honest nonjudgmental communication has given life new meaning. Early in my quit I cried out in pain at the caving of of addicts. Today I understand successful quitters are those that want freedom and control more than nicotine. We want this freedom, self control and satisfaction enough to do what it takes to remain quit. Take control one day at a time! The Human mind and body are truly amazing, our ability to do the things we set our minds to is far beyond our normal understanding. Given the tools we learn here at KTC, if followed makes quitting (after the initial withdrawal) rather simple. Sure you pre HOF quitters may be saying BULLSHIT! But looking back tonight I found most of the tools useful in quitting and used those that worked for me to the fullest extent. Brotherhood and Accountability lead to success.
I can't begin to explain how glad I am that I caved 1 year ago!
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Wt57 day 1 no April fool joke I've paced the floor all night I quit!!! 38 yr of slavery I'm here for the long haul.
Almost one year to the hour, I'm up contemplating what 1 year quit means. Friends and fellow addicts each of us come to that point in our lives that we want control more than we want nicotine. I never understood this. I always thought I could live my life of lies and pretend that I had control, I didn't. The lies got harder to conceal and like any liar lies were told to cover lies till my web was so massive I was constantly caught in my own web.
''Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive''
Not only has this year been a time to learn to live life nicotine free, but I'm learning to be honest to myself and others. Being able to have so many of you to reach out to in a time of need and receive honest nonjudgmental communication has given life new meaning. Early in my quit I cried out in pain at the caving of of addicts. Today I understand successful quitters are those that want freedom and control more than nicotine. We want this freedom, self control and satisfaction enough to do what it takes to remain quit. Take control one day at a time! The Human mind and body are truly amazing, our ability to do the things we set our minds to is far beyond our normal understanding. Given the tools we learn here at KTC, if followed makes quitting (after the initial withdrawal) rather simple. Sure you pre HOF quitters may be saying BULLSHIT! But looking back tonight I found most of the tools useful in quitting and used those that worked for me to the fullest extent. Brotherhood and Accountability lead to success.
I can't begin to explain how glad I am that I caved 1 year ago!
I am proud of you and your quit brother, reading your posts have been inspirational and shown me and Many others what badass quiting is all about!
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Wt57 day 1 no April fool joke I've paced the floor all night I quit!!! 38 yr of slavery I'm here for the long haul.
Almost one year to the hour, I'm up contemplating what 1 year quit means. Friends and fellow addicts each of us come to that point in our lives that we want control more than we want nicotine. I never understood this. I always thought I could live my life of lies and pretend that I had control, I didn't. The lies got harder to conceal and like any liar lies were told to cover lies till my web was so massive I was constantly caught in my own web.
''Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive''
Not only has this year been a time to learn to live life nicotine free, but I'm learning to be honest to myself and others. Being able to have so many of you to reach out to in a time of need and receive honest nonjudgmental communication has given life new meaning. Early in my quit I cried out in pain at the caving of of addicts. Today I understand successful quitters are those that want freedom and control more than nicotine. We want this freedom, self control and satisfaction enough to do what it takes to remain quit. Take control one day at a time! The Human mind and body are truly amazing, our ability to do the things we set our minds to is far beyond our normal understanding. Given the tools we learn here at KTC, if followed makes quitting (after the initial withdrawal) rather simple. Sure you pre HOF quitters may be saying BULLSHIT! But looking back tonight I found most of the tools useful in quitting and used those that worked for me to the fullest extent. Brotherhood and Accountability lead to success.
I can't begin to explain how glad I am that I caved 1 year ago!
I am proud of you and your quit brother, reading your posts have been inspirational and shown me and Many others what badass quiting is all about!
congrats on one year! Thanks for all you've done here WT.
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Wt57 day 1 no April fool joke I've paced the floor all night I quit!!! 38 yr of slavery I'm here for the long haul.
Almost one year to the hour, I'm up contemplating what 1 year quit means. Friends and fellow addicts each of us come to that point in our lives that we want control more than we want nicotine. I never understood this. I always thought I could live my life of lies and pretend that I had control, I didn't. The lies got harder to conceal and like any liar lies were told to cover lies till my web was so massive I was constantly caught in my own web.
''Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive''
Not only has this year been a time to learn to live life nicotine free, but I'm learning to be honest to myself and others. Being able to have so many of you to reach out to in a time of need and receive honest nonjudgmental communication has given life new meaning. Early in my quit I cried out in pain at the caving of of addicts. Today I understand successful quitters are those that want freedom and control more than nicotine. We want this freedom, self control and satisfaction enough to do what it takes to remain quit. Take control one day at a time! The Human mind and body are truly amazing, our ability to do the things we set our minds to is far beyond our normal understanding. Given the tools we learn here at KTC, if followed makes quitting (after the initial withdrawal) rather simple. Sure you pre HOF quitters may be saying BULLSHIT! But looking back tonight I found most of the tools useful in quitting and used those that worked for me to the fullest extent. Brotherhood and Accountability lead to success.
I can't begin to explain how glad I am that I caved 1 year ago!
I am proud of you and your quit brother, reading your posts have been inspirational and shown me and Many others what badass quiting is all about!
congrats on one year! Thanks for all you've done here WT.
You, like many others, are an inspiration to me. You're one of those many I think of every time I get a crave, and I still don't want to let you down. The best thing you said right there (to me anyway) was this:
"Not only has this year been a time to learn to live life nicotine free, but I'm learning to be honest to myself and others."
That might not hit home with everybody, but that is 100% me. Congrats on a year, you April fool. :)
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I need to make this post for me to remember how bad I hate UST and another reason why!
I've had a rough week, not craving or wanting nicotine. For 4 months I've been suffering sever GI problems. I've had dozens of test and the dr.s have been throwing shit at the wall to see if anything sticks, none has, on the other hand my shit has stuck to everything and everywhere. Finally what they hoped wouldn't be the case it appears I have a inflammatory bowel disease ( probably crohns or ulcerative colitis). This past few days I've been researching and found there may be a connection to smokeless tabacco. I'm pissed that I was so stupid but very glad that I am quit. Who would have ever thought dipping would cause me to shit my pants? Warning: this product may lead to uncontrolled shitting your pants! Never saw that warning on a can! Has anyone else had IBD? Waiting for more test results and probably another colonoscopy. Why not celebrate 400 days with that, had one days before quitting.
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I need to make this post for me to remember how bad I hate UST and another reason why!
I've had a rough week, not craving or wanting nicotine. For 4 months I've been suffering sever GI problems. I've had dozens of test and the dr.s have been throwing shit at the wall to see if anything sticks, none has, on the other hand my shit has stuck to everything and everywhere. Finally what they hoped wouldn't be the case it appears I have a inflammatory bowel disease ( probably crohns or ulcerative colitis). This past few days I've been researching and found there may be a connection to smokeless tabacco. I'm pissed that I was so stupid but very glad that I am quit. Who would have ever thought dipping would cause me to shit my pants? Warning: this product may lead to uncontrolled shitting your pants! Never saw that warning on a can! Has anyone else had IBD? Waiting for more test results and probably another colonoscopy. Why not celebrate 400 days with that, had one days before quitting.
Damn. That sounds like some awful shit.
Seriously, I hope you get everything straightened out.
Its funny, I have a guy pissed at me right now and looking to leave the site because he thinks our hate for chew and big tobacco comes from the fact that we haven't come to terms with our quit yet and use it as a coping mechanisim. Basically he thinks we are fake. More specifically he thinks I'm a drama king and too mean. Because I went off on him for posting a link about nicotine harm reduction and how chew is so much better than smoking.
I was pondering if maybe he was right and determined he was wrong. Then I see this and I KNOW I'm right.
This shit is bad from every angel.
How anyone can NOT hate this stuff is beyond me. The damage it does is unforgivable.
The hate we feel for this crap is REAL and well deserved.
Hang in there WT. Listen to the doctor's, they'll straighten your ass out. Literally.
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Some things in life are easy and others are very hard! The longer we live and the more experiences we have pass our way the more we appreciate life with all its ups and downs. In my short time being a member of this 'classy' group I've learned to appreciate life more than in the previous 50+ years. We see addicts come here that have had miracles. We also see those with daily challenges of being single parent. Others with spouses or family members suffering life threatening illnesses. All of this is life.
Becoming an addict was one of the easiest things I've ever done, it was automatic based on only a handful of decisions that I made as a foolish, attention seeking teen. Being a (ninja) dipper for 40 years was not only hard but painful, humiliating and totally embarrassing. Because of my addiction I sunk to some of the lowest position of self worth a person can go.
Joining KTC and quitting the first 30 days or so were some of the hardest things I had ever done. Yep it hurt like hell to change my life. I documented my pain so I could always go back and remind myself how bad it was. I'm very glad I did because at my age I have a hard time remembering what I did yesterday and quitting today is easy. I don't even have to think about it most days. So without that record I'd be fooled into thinking that quitting wasn't that bad and consider repeating past mistakes. Reading about setting at the toilet crying as I flushed my stash brings those memories flooding back to my mind and there is no way in hell I'd want to repeat that!
Quitting was the hardest thing I've ever done and quitting today was the easiest thing I've done today.
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Some things in life are easy and others are very hard! The longer we live and the more experiences we have pass our way the more we appreciate life with all its ups and downs. In my short time being a member of this 'classy' group I've learned to appreciate life more than in the previous 50+ years. We see addicts come here that have had miracles. We also see those with daily challenges of being single parent. Others with spouses or family members suffering life threatening illnesses. All of this is life.
Becoming an addict was one of the easiest things I've ever done, it was automatic based on only a handful of decisions that I made as a foolish, attention seeking teen. Being a (ninja) dipper for 40 years was not only hard but painful, humiliating and totally embarrassing. Because of my addiction I sunk to some of the lowest position of self worth a person can go.
Joining KTC and quitting the first 30 days or so were some of the hardest things I had ever done. Yep it hurt like hell to change my life. I documented my pain so I could always go back and remind myself how bad it was. I'm very glad I did because at my age I have a hard time remembering what I did yesterday and quitting today is easy. I don't even have to think about it most days. So without that record I'd be fooled into thinking that quitting wasn't that bad and consider repeating past mistakes. Reading about setting at the toilet crying as I flushed my stash brings those memories flooding back to my mind and there is no way in hell I'd want to repeat that!
Quitting was the hardest thing I've ever done and quitting today was the easiest thing I've done today.
This just goes back to the old adage ODAAT. It does get better, but some days our addicted minds wander, those reminders are what get us thru. Never forget what brought you here! Well done wt brother,
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Some things in life are easy and others are very hard! The longer we live and the more experiences we have pass our way the more we appreciate life with all its ups and downs. In my short time being a member of this 'classy' group I've learned to appreciate life more than in the previous 50+ years. We see addicts come here that have had miracles. We also see those with daily challenges of being single parent. Others with spouses or family members suffering life threatening illnesses. All of this is life.
Becoming an addict was one of the easiest things I've ever done, it was automatic based on only a handful of decisions that I made as a foolish, attention seeking teen. Being a (ninja) dipper for 40 years was not only hard but painful, humiliating and totally embarrassing. Because of my addiction I sunk to some of the lowest position of self worth a person can go.
Joining KTC and quitting the first 30 days or so were some of the hardest things I had ever done. Yep it hurt like hell to change my life. I documented my pain so I could always go back and remind myself how bad it was. I'm very glad I did because at my age I have a hard time remembering what I did yesterday and quitting today is easy. I don't even have to think about it most days. So without that record I'd be fooled into thinking that quitting wasn't that bad and consider repeating past mistakes. Reading about setting at the toilet crying as I flushed my stash brings those memories flooding back to my mind and there is no way in hell I'd want to repeat that!Â
Quitting was the hardest thing I've ever done and quitting today was the easiest thing I've done today.
This just goes back to the old adage ODAAT. It does get better, but some days our addicted minds wander, those reminders are what get us thru. Never forget what brought you here! Well done wt brother,
Keep on keeping on my brother!
Quitting aint easy but the reward is incredible!
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Four hundred fricking days of freedom! To newer quitters I'll offer a word of advise, stay close to the site, use it, pay forward the support you receive and soon your days will be flying past and quitting becomes a morning routine just like that first dip was in your past life. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have the tools to remain quit and use them. I don't spend as much time online as I once did but still will always be here if anyone wants to pm me. Today is just another day. 'Another quit day'. Quitting is easy when I make that daily commitment.
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Four hundred fricking days of freedom! To newer quitters I'll offer a word of advise, stay close to the site, use it, pay forward the support you receive and soon your days will be flying past and quitting becomes a morning routine just like that first dip was in your past life. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have the tools to remain quit and use them. I don't spend as much time online as I once did but still will always be here if anyone wants to pm me. Today is just another day. 'Another quit day'. Quitting is easy when I make that daily commitment.
Wt=TRUTH
Congrats on 400, man.
Younlings, heed his advice. He is a wise man.
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Four hundred fricking days of freedom! To newer quitters I'll offer a word of advise, stay close to the site, use it, pay forward the support you receive and soon your days will be flying past and quitting becomes a morning routine just like that first dip was in your past life. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have the tools to remain quit and use them. I don't spend as much time online as I once did but still will always be here if anyone wants to pm me. Today is just another day. 'Another quit day'. Quitting is easy when I make that daily commitment.
Wt=TRUTH
Congrats on 400, man.
Younlings, heed his advice. He is a wise man.
Your the man wt. Every time I see your name come across a post I hop skip and jump to it. Your one of my favorite reads every time. Thank you for being one of the many to help me get to where I am. You made my quit even possible.
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Congratulations on 400. Big accomplishment and big win. Many of us have benefitted from your postings so please know that your quit has strengthened many of ours also. If you were here I'd buy ya a drink. Since you aren't, guess ill have one for myself! Congratulations and I look forward to many updates in the future.
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Four hundred fricking days of freedom! To newer quitters I'll offer a word of advise, stay close to the site, use it, pay forward the support you receive and soon your days will be flying past and quitting becomes a morning routine just like that first dip was in your past life. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have the tools to remain quit and use them. I don't spend as much time online as I once did but still will always be here if anyone wants to pm me. Today is just another day. 'Another quit day'. Quitting is easy when I make that daily commitment.
Wt=TRUTH
Congrats on 400, man.
Younlings, heed his advice. He is a wise man.
Your the man wt. Every time I see your name come across a post I hop skip and jump to it. Your one of my favorite reads every time. Thank you for being one of the many to help me get to where I am. You made my quit even possible.
WT!!!!!!
What a ride my brother......CONGRATS on FOUR HUNDO!!
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Four hundred fricking days of freedom! To newer quitters I'll offer a word of advise, stay close to the site, use it, pay forward the support you receive and soon your days will be flying past and quitting becomes a morning routine just like that first dip was in your past life. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have the tools to remain quit and use them. I don't spend as much time online as I once did but still will always be here if anyone wants to pm me. Today is just another day. 'Another quit day'. Quitting is easy when I make that daily commitment.
Wt=TRUTH
Congrats on 400, man.
Younlings, heed his advice. He is a wise man.
Your the man wt. Every time I see your name come across a post I hop skip and jump to it. Your one of my favorite reads every time. Thank you for being one of the many to help me get to where I am. You made my quit even possible.
WT!!!!!!
What a ride my brother......CONGRATS on FOUR HUNDO!!
proud of you brother.. thanks for all your help along the way, and thanks for setting a fine example for all of us.. always here for you..peace
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Yipee Skippee on 400.
That was a manly yipee by the way.
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Four hundred fricking days of freedom! To newer quitters I'll offer a word of advise, stay close to the site, use it, pay forward the support you receive and soon your days will be flying past and quitting becomes a morning routine just like that first dip was in your past life. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have the tools to remain quit and use them. I don't spend as much time online as I once did but still will always be here if anyone wants to pm me. Today is just another day. 'Another quit day'. Quitting is easy when I make that daily commitment.
Wt=TRUTH
Congrats on 400, man.
Younlings, heed his advice. He is a wise man.
Your the man wt. Every time I see your name come across a post I hop skip and jump to it. Your one of my favorite reads every time. Thank you for being one of the many to help me get to where I am. You made my quit even possible.
WT!!!!!!
What a ride my brother......CONGRATS on FOUR HUNDO!!
proud of you brother.. thanks for all your help along the way, and thanks for setting a fine example for all of us.. always here for you..peace
I'll follow WT any fucking where, anytime!!!
Powerful quit and powerful hate for Big stinking lying tobacco!!
I quit with you today brother WT!
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people. I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people. I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
WT57
Here is how you are going to do it...................................
one day at a time
same way you got yourself to this point
stay close to the site for a while, post your success and struggles on here, I am 100% confident that you can get thru this little rut you describe
10# in a week is kind of odd though, you sure everything is OK? Quit eating so damn much, go to bed a little earlier, chew on some toothpicks or something?
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people. I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
Hey there brother, I can put myself in a very similar situation that you are. It sounds like that void that we are now trying to fill, of 'just what should I do now'.
For me, yes, I did put on 30+ pounds when I quit, so alot of that 'downtime' was eating. Once I realized it (close to day 80ish), I started trying something different. I got more involved in small 'crafty' projects, leatherworking, paracord bracelets, just anything small to keep my mind occupied and hands busy.
Recently I have also started on an exercise program which I am loving and that is filling up a good portion of that time, so maybe something like this, or just getting out for a 20+ minute walk, just to 'get lost' could help.
Damn that is a huge boy scout camp, well not sure how that many will be, but in my experience with smaller numbers, even if its alot, hope the camp has alot of open space, even talk to a tree. (LOL). If it helps try to get the group to stay to the edge of the 'mass'.
Hang in there as we are finding out once we got rid of that poison from our lives that there is so much more learning that we do, and with that we become such a better person.
Yell if you need anything. - Derek
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people.  I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
Hey there brother, I can put myself in a very similar situation that you are. It sounds like that void that we are now trying to fill, of 'just what should I do now'.
For me, yes, I did put on 30+ pounds when I quit, so alot of that 'downtime' was eating. Once I realized it (close to day 80ish), I started trying something different. I got more involved in small 'crafty' projects, leatherworking, paracord bracelets, just anything small to keep my mind occupied and hands busy.
Recently I have also started on an exercise program which I am loving and that is filling up a good portion of that time, so maybe something like this, or just getting out for a 20+ minute walk, just to 'get lost' could help.
Damn that is a huge boy scout camp, well not sure how that many will be, but in my experience with smaller numbers, even if its alot, hope the camp has alot of open space, even talk to a tree. (LOL). If it helps try to get the group to stay to the edge of the 'mass'.
Hang in there as we are finding out once we got rid of that poison from our lives that there is so much more learning that we do, and with that we become such a better person.
Yell if you need anything. - Derek
So for me, mine is opposite, I have lost weight since I quit. But that was because I put into play more exercise as a copping method and it really worked. Granted, I am not as far into my quit as you, (140 days), but I think the plan I have is and will work. Why? Because it's MY plan and I refuse to let myself down....again. Kepp pushing brother.
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people.  I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
Hey there brother, I can put myself in a very similar situation that you are. It sounds like that void that we are now trying to fill, of 'just what should I do now'.
For me, yes, I did put on 30+ pounds when I quit, so alot of that 'downtime' was eating. Once I realized it (close to day 80ish), I started trying something different. I got more involved in small 'crafty' projects, leatherworking, paracord bracelets, just anything small to keep my mind occupied and hands busy.
Recently I have also started on an exercise program which I am loving and that is filling up a good portion of that time, so maybe something like this, or just getting out for a 20+ minute walk, just to 'get lost' could help.
Damn that is a huge boy scout camp, well not sure how that many will be, but in my experience with smaller numbers, even if its alot, hope the camp has alot of open space, even talk to a tree. (LOL). If it helps try to get the group to stay to the edge of the 'mass'.
Hang in there as we are finding out once we got rid of that poison from our lives that there is so much more learning that we do, and with that we become such a better person.
Yell if you need anything. - Derek
So for me, mine is opposite, I have lost weight since I quit. But that was because I put into play more exercise as a copping method and it really worked. Granted, I am not as far into my quit as you, (140 days), but I think the plan I have is and will work. Why? Because it's MY plan and I refuse to let myself down....again. Kepp pushing brother.
I've been in the same boat brother. My evenings have been a danger zone. After the kid goes to bed, i still snack before I sleep. I have noticed I'll eat more calories between 8p-10p than I eat the whole day. We're just trying to fill that void. I realized that if I just went to bed early I could eliminate that problem. Hence another change I need to add to the list.
Try taking a walk at a certain time of the day. be consistent. If I had your scenery Id walk everyday! I'm in the friggin dustbowl.. 'crackup'
I've been listening to music alot lately as well. I found a nature music channel on pandora, and it's extremely calming. As for crowds I'm the same. never enjoyed them once I got older. Just focus on your own group, like derek said avoid the mass.. Enjoy the beauty around you, I'd give my left nut to go camping, no matter how many people.. remember what I said before. don't think to much, we tend to over complicate everything. just have fun buddy.. your doing great.. peace
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people. I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
You do it the same way you have made it 400+ days quit. Bit by bit and by using your tools.
I've been stessing too...about coaching baseball. Last year I can distinctly remember coaching first base, hunched over, hands on my knees, heart beating through my chest, ans barely able to speak. My poor wife though I was going to pass out and coaches from the other team kept asking if I was ok. I WAS NOT fucking Ok. I was a God Damn mess.
So this year when baseball rolled around, I was scares as hell for our first game. Anxiety up the ASS as just the memory of last year had me freaking out...same field, same kids, same fucking trees, same STUPID dog park next to the field with dogs barking...talk about a flashback from hell.
But...I grinded out that first game using a lot of the tools I had acquired here the past 353 days, and I made it through. After the first game the 2nd game was easier, and after that I had hardly a thought about last year, dip, anxiety or anything.
I think you need some confidence and beliefe in yourself WT. Youre a bad mofo. You been through some shit but have managed to come out clean , every time. I don't see where this boy scout trip will be any different. Time to reap some of the benefits of all that fighting you've been doing. How many battles do you have to win before you don't fear the next one?
FEAR...False Evidence Appearing Real. I think that rings true with you WT. Because all the evidence I have seen from you is that you are a fucking tank that has won every battle since joiningktc. I don't see this one being any different.
You got this shit!!! I'll bet my house you will be fine and come home still a champion. I think its time for you to start giving yourself a little more credit and putting a few bucks on WT as well. You are a proven winner.
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people.  I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
You do it the same way you have made it 400+ days quit. Bit by bit and by using your tools.
I've been stessing too...about coaching baseball. Last year I can distinctly remember coaching first base, hunched over, hands on my knees, heart beating through my chest, ans barely able to speak. My poor wife though I was going to pass out and coaches from the other team kept asking if I was ok. I WAS NOT fucking Ok. I was a God Damn mess.
So this year when baseball rolled around, I was scares as hell for our first game. Anxiety up the ASS as just the memory of last year had me freaking out...same field, same kids, same fucking trees, same STUPID dog park next to the field with dogs barking...talk about a flashback from hell.
But...I grinded out that first game using a lot of the tools I had acquired here the past 353 days, and I made it through. After the first game the 2nd game was easier, and after that I had hardly a thought about last year, dip, anxiety or anything.
I think you need some confidence and beliefe in yourself WT. Youre a bad mofo. You been through some shit but have managed to come out clean , every time. I don't see where this boy scout trip will be any different. Time to reap some of the benefits of all that fighting you've been doing. How many battles do you have to win before you don't fear the next one?
FEAR...False Evidence Appearing Real. I think that rings true with you WT. Because all the evidence I have seen from you is that you are a fucking tank that has won every battle since joiningktc. I don't see this one being any different.
You got this shit!!! I'll bet my house you will be fine and come home still a champion. I think its time for you to start giving yourself a little more credit and putting a few bucks on WT as well. You are a proven winner.
Now that's what this site is all about. Perfectly said Diesel...bravo!! Encouragement, Empowerment, Strength,Brotherhood. God damn I'm proud to be part of this sanctuary. Quit On Men.
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people. I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
WT, there have been several occasions over the past four months where you have said you have been inspired by ME. Well, YOU have been one of the main dudes who inspire me. I can't offer anything more than Diesel, Jay, Kana, Phil, SirDerek, or IG2H have offered, but I can ask you to inspire me once again.
INSPIRE ME, WT!! There are days I still need it and I don't see that going away. Diesel used the word fear with one hell of an acronym. You are NOT scared of quitting anymore, nor are you scared of those triggers.
INSPIRE ME, WT!!
BTW, the student did NOT just become the teacher. I wrote half of that for me. You, WT, are still the teacher. And I'll bet Diesel's house, too. :)
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people.  I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
WT, there have been several occasions over the past four months where you have said you have been inspired by ME. Well, YOU have been one of the main dudes who inspire me. I can't offer anything more than Diesel, Jay, Kana, Phil, SirDerek, or IG2H have offered, but I can ask you to inspire me once again.
INSPIRE ME, WT!! There are days I still need it and I don't see that going away. Diesel used the word fear with one hell of an acronym. You are NOT scared of quitting anymore, nor are you scared of those triggers.
INSPIRE ME, WT!!
BTW, the student did NOT just become the teacher. I wrote half of that for me. You, WT, are still the teacher. And I'll bet Diesel's house, too. :)
Thanks everyone! You are all right, I've got this and all my success should have me living a life of confidence. The years of failure and slavery left me with a low self esteem. I guess I'm not alone, many of us are experiencing such dramatic changes that only time can make our healing possible. D, I'm no more of a teacher than you or anyone else. We all wear multiple hats in our membership here at KTC. Watching so many addicts come and go I see that activity (giving and taking advise, just immersion in the site) is directly proportional to success in quitting and staying quit. A couple hundred days ago I thought I should be able to remove myself from the site and be "cured". It was about that time that 2 close KTC friends caved, one at 205 days and another at 2 years. Reality finally set in that I was still a newbie. Like the invincibility that led us to using nicotine when we were 'young' is very similar to the false sense of security in our quit that leads so many 'new' quitters (under 2 years) to cave. I believe many that quit and leave the site remain quit just like many addicts quit completely on their own. How they are different from me is a mystery. I don't need that answer, all I need is what works for me and the tools that I need to remain quit. Just sharing experiences and having others respond is one of those powerful tools. Each of us find our own niche, the activity online that helps us most.
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people.  I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
WT, there have been several occasions over the past four months where you have said you have been inspired by ME. Well, YOU have been one of the main dudes who inspire me. I can't offer anything more than Diesel, Jay, Kana, Phil, SirDerek, or IG2H have offered, but I can ask you to inspire me once again.
INSPIRE ME, WT!! There are days I still need it and I don't see that going away. Diesel used the word fear with one hell of an acronym. You are NOT scared of quitting anymore, nor are you scared of those triggers.
INSPIRE ME, WT!!
BTW, the student did NOT just become the teacher. I wrote half of that for me. You, WT, are still the teacher. And I'll bet Diesel's house, too. :)
Thanks everyone! You are all right, I've got this and all my success should have me living a life of confidence. The years of failure and slavery left me with a low self esteem. I guess I'm not alone, many of us are experiencing such dramatic changes that only time can make our healing possible. D, I'm no more of a teacher than you or anyone else. We all wear multiple hats in our membership here at KTC. Watching so many addicts come and go I see that activity (giving and taking advise, just immersion in the site) is directly proportional to success in quitting and staying quit. A couple hundred days ago I thought I should be able to remove myself from the site and be "cured". It was about that time that 2 close KTC friends caved, one at 205 days and another at 2 years. Reality finally set in that I was still a newbie. Like the invincibility that led us to using nicotine when we were 'young' is very similar to the false sense of security in our quit that leads so many 'new' quitters (under 2 years) to cave. I believe many that quit and leave the site remain quit just like many addicts quit completely on their own. How they are different from me is a mystery. I don't need that answer, all I need is what works for me and the tools that I need to remain quit. Just sharing experiences and having others respond is one of those powerful tools. Each of us find our own niche, the activity online that helps us most.
Great read wt. I appreciate you brother. I can't give you to much advice, but I will throw some out there.
I know your going to do this, but let me just say. Meet them obstacles head on WT. Don't even give it another thought. If you want to paint your house, plan and paint. I get up sometimes and I feel like krap, but once I'm up and moving around i'm fine. Same thing with those obstacles WT. Once you get out there and start them, the thinking about it will be over and you will find that they are just another day in Quitville.
I'm so glad your in my corner WT, you and others are the reason I'm hear. I literally feel like I owe some of ya'll my life. Thanks. Glad to be quit with you.
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people.  I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
WT, there have been several occasions over the past four months where you have said you have been inspired by ME. Well, YOU have been one of the main dudes who inspire me. I can't offer anything more than Diesel, Jay, Kana, Phil, SirDerek, or IG2H have offered, but I can ask you to inspire me once again.
INSPIRE ME, WT!! There are days I still need it and I don't see that going away. Diesel used the word fear with one hell of an acronym. You are NOT scared of quitting anymore, nor are you scared of those triggers.
INSPIRE ME, WT!!
BTW, the student did NOT just become the teacher. I wrote half of that for me. You, WT, are still the teacher. And I'll bet Diesel's house, too. :)
Thanks everyone! You are all right, I've got this and all my success should have me living a life of confidence. The years of failure and slavery left me with a low self esteem. I guess I'm not alone, many of us are experiencing such dramatic changes that only time can make our healing possible. D, I'm no more of a teacher than you or anyone else. We all wear multiple hats in our membership here at KTC. Watching so many addicts come and go I see that activity (giving and taking advise, just immersion in the site) is directly proportional to success in quitting and staying quit. A couple hundred days ago I thought I should be able to remove myself from the site and be "cured". It was about that time that 2 close KTC friends caved, one at 205 days and another at 2 years. Reality finally set in that I was still a newbie. Like the invincibility that led us to using nicotine when we were 'young' is very similar to the false sense of security in our quit that leads so many 'new' quitters (under 2 years) to cave. I believe many that quit and leave the site remain quit just like many addicts quit completely on their own. How they are different from me is a mystery. I don't need that answer, all I need is what works for me and the tools that I need to remain quit. Just sharing experiences and having others respond is one of those powerful tools. Each of us find our own niche, the activity online that helps us most.
Great read wt. I appreciate you brother. I can't give you to much advice, but I will throw some out there.
I know your going to do this, but let me just say. Meet them obstacles head on WT. Don't even give it another thought. If you want to paint your house, plan and paint. I get up sometimes and I feel like krap, but once I'm up and moving around i'm fine. Same thing with those obstacles WT. Once you get out there and start them, the thinking about it will be over and you will find that they are just another day in Quitville.
I'm so glad your in my corner WT, you and others are the reason I'm hear. I literally feel like I owe some of ya'll my life. Thanks. Glad to be quit with you.
Repeat this my friend...out loud....100 times...while looking in the mirror....then tell me how you feel....
Now I am the Voice.
I will LEAD, not follow.
I will BELIEVE, not doubt.
I will CREATE, not destroy.
I am a FORCE for God.
I am a LEADER.
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I Hate a Cave and always have and always will!
Most of us probably feel the same way. Most of us have probably been there, years of addiction placed me in that stupid position of caving hundreds of times. The fight or race of winning against nicotine can be so overwhelming without a crowd cheering us on. A poem that expresses the tenacity that an addict should have: The Race (http://holyjoe.org/poetry/anon3.htm).
I will usually jump in and give a caver shit for giving in to the weakness that could be averted if only they followed the KTC plan. Lately we've seen some really stupid falls. I'm here to join in the crowd that is on the sideline cheering them on to see if they will pick theirselves up and continue the race. Too many times when I fell down I waited for the runners in the next race to encourage me to get up. Laying on the ground in self pity was my way of coping till I found a audience of others in the same race encouraging me along. I'm not caving and I'm running like hell. That isn't to say that at times I don't get one of those stupid craves. These stumbles can slow me down or give me encouragement because I've successfully fought that urge off. I hear the crowd cheering me on and choose to continue the race daily. If you listen close I'll be there beside you cheering you on. Thank you for cheering me on, I'm winning with all your encouragement.
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I Hate a Cave and always have and always will!
Most of us probably feel the same way. Most of us have probably been there, years of addiction placed me in that stupid position of caving hundreds of times. The fight or race of winning against nicotine can be so overwhelming without a crowd cheering us on. A poem that expresses the tenacity that an addict should have: The Race (http://holyjoe.org/poetry/anon3.htm).
I will usually jump in and give a caver shit for giving in to the weakness that could be averted if only they followed the KTC plan. Lately we've seen some really stupid falls. I'm here to join in the crowd that is on the sideline cheering them on to see if they will pick theirselves up and continue the race. Too many times when I fell down I waited for the runners in the next race to encourage me to get up. Laying on the ground in self pity was my way of coping till I found a audience of others in the same race encouraging me along. I'm not caving and I'm running like hell. That isn't to say that at times I don't get one of those stupid craves. These stumbles can slow me down or give me encouragement because I've successfully fought that urge off. I hear the crowd cheering me on and choose to continue the race daily. If you listen close I'll be there beside you cheering you on. Thank you for cheering me on, I'm winning with all your encouragement.
I've missed all the caves but sounds like a rash of caving broke out. I still think it comes down the phrase..."It's not the dog in the fight that counts, its the fight in the dog." Some of these addicts are just submissive bitches.
This plan works if you really want to quit and follow it with exactness. There is no mystery to a cave. A cave is ALWAYS planned. It usually starts when the addict starts to think about his quit past today. They become weakened in the "quit forever" thinking then act on impulse....Sad really. So I feel sorry for them, but for me, I love that I hate the poison and have no crave or want for it. I still have other battles but this one...as long as I keep to the plan, is a cake walk.
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At this time 1 year ago I was about half way to HOF and facing annual stress that I feared would be my downfall. Turned out I was on a adrenaline high that made the craving and triggers seem like minor distractions. Lately I've been struggling with those seasonal activities and stresses that have always been dealt with by hiding behind a can of dip. I have no desire to use nicotine but I also don't have the adrenaline pulling me through the stressful days. I find myself vulnerable to being drawn in by an activity that would dull the stress. Impulsive eating in the late evening has become an escape. Unlike so many others i didn't overeat or gain weight when I quit. In fact I lost 30# but the in just the past week i've gained 10#. My mind has been working overtime trying to make those adjustments to deal with life. I recognize what is going on but really not coping well with it. If I had quit any other time of year I would have had to deal with these seasonal pressures the first time around. In about 1 month along with my long days I'm going on a 3 day Boy Scout council camp, they are expecting 10,000 boys to attend. I still get panic attacks in crowds of people.  I know I need to find positive activities, attitudes and coping skills. I'm just not quite sure how to do it, life has always been ruled by nicotine. I'm open to any suggestions.
WT, there have been several occasions over the past four months where you have said you have been inspired by ME. Well, YOU have been one of the main dudes who inspire me. I can't offer anything more than Diesel, Jay, Kana, Phil, SirDerek, or IG2H have offered, but I can ask you to inspire me once again.
INSPIRE ME, WT!! There are days I still need it and I don't see that going away. Diesel used the word fear with one hell of an acronym. You are NOT scared of quitting anymore, nor are you scared of those triggers.
INSPIRE ME, WT!!
BTW, the student did NOT just become the teacher. I wrote half of that for me. You, WT, are still the teacher. And I'll bet Diesel's house, too. :)
Thanks everyone! You are all right, I've got this and all my success should have me living a life of confidence. The years of failure and slavery left me with a low self esteem. I guess I'm not alone, many of us are experiencing such dramatic changes that only time can make our healing possible. D, I'm no more of a teacher than you or anyone else. We all wear multiple hats in our membership here at KTC. Watching so many addicts come and go I see that activity (giving and taking advise, just immersion in the site) is directly proportional to success in quitting and staying quit. A couple hundred days ago I thought I should be able to remove myself from the site and be "cured". It was about that time that 2 close KTC friends caved, one at 205 days and another at 2 years. Reality finally set in that I was still a newbie. Like the invincibility that led us to using nicotine when we were 'young' is very similar to the false sense of security in our quit that leads so many 'new' quitters (under 2 years) to cave. I believe many that quit and leave the site remain quit just like many addicts quit completely on their own. How they are different from me is a mystery. I don't need that answer, all I need is what works for me and the tools that I need to remain quit. Just sharing experiences and having others respond is one of those powerful tools. Each of us find our own niche, the activity online that helps us most.
Great read wt. I appreciate you brother. I can't give you to much advice, but I will throw some out there.
I know your going to do this, but let me just say. Meet them obstacles head on WT. Don't even give it another thought. If you want to paint your house, plan and paint. I get up sometimes and I feel like krap, but once I'm up and moving around i'm fine. Same thing with those obstacles WT. Once you get out there and start them, the thinking about it will be over and you will find that they are just another day in Quitville.
I'm so glad your in my corner WT, you and others are the reason I'm hear. I literally feel like I owe some of ya'll my life. Thanks. Glad to be quit with you.
Repeat this my friend...out loud....100 times...while looking in the mirror....then tell me how you feel....
Now I am the Voice.
I will LEAD, not follow.
I will BELIEVE, not doubt.
I will CREATE, not destroy.
I am a FORCE for God.
I am a LEADER.
That is really good stuff CleanFuel. I don't know why there is power in hearing something as well as saying it, but there is.
-
HOF + 1 year! HOF is an accomplishment that is achieved with determination and help from the brotherhood.
H----help and aid in
O---overcoming and conquering my
F---fear of failure by living the KTC plan ODAAT
That 100 day accomplishment 1 year ago was a very exciting beginning to a very different life for me. After over 14,000 days of being an addict (all of my adult life) living nicotine free has taken a lot of adjustment and is still a struggle at times. It would be easier to fall back to the old ways of doing things rather than learning and growing. I've learned to love the freedom, hate nicotine and what it stole from me. I've learned to dwell on the here and now and let go of most of my past. I still catch myself sneaking back into the past but have those that slap me back into today. The same goes for thinking about the future, when I start questioning if I can make my commitment last I remember that I can do whatever I want TODAY! Yesterday I went on a hike with my 5 yr old grandson, we climbed a steep hill and when we turned around to descend the hill he asked. How do we get down? The answer was as simple as quitting nicotine 'one step at a time.'
Today is gone and I was successful in keeping my word. Either late tonight or when I wake in the morning I will recommit to be nicotine free 1 more day. 464 days nicotine free have come and gone in my life, it seems like yesterday that I joined my BOQ. I'll never forget the pain, when I start thinking it wasn't so bad I return to my intro and refresh my memory. I can't begin to express how greatful I am to KTC and so many of you for expecting me to keep my word. In some aspect we are strangers but in othes we are companions experiencing the same journey that non-addict friends can never understand. Thank you!
-
HOF + 1 year! HOF is an accomplishment that is achieved with determination and help from the brotherhood.
H----help and aid in
O---overcoming and conquering my
F---fear of failure by living the KTC plan ODAAT
That 100 day accomplishment 1 year ago was a very exciting beginning to a very different life for me. After over 14,000 days of being an addict (all of my adult life) living nicotine free has taken a lot of adjustment and is still a struggle at times. It would be easier to fall back to the old ways of doing things rather than learning and growing. I've learned to love the freedom, hate nicotine and what it stole from me. I've learned to dwell on the here and now and let go of most of my past. I still catch myself sneaking back into the past but have those that slap me back into today. The same goes for thinking about the future, when I start questioning if I can make my commitment last I remember that I can do whatever I want TODAY! Yesterday I went on a hike with my 5 yr old grandson, we climbed a steep hill and when we turned around to descend the hill he asked. How do we get down? The answer was as simple as quitting nicotine 'one step at a time.'
Today is gone and I was successful in keeping my word. Either late tonight or when I wake in the morning I will recommit to be nicotine free 1 more day. 464 days nicotine free have come and gone in my life, it seems like yesterday that I joined my BOQ. I'll never forget the pain, when I start thinking it wasn't so bad I return to my intro and refresh my memory. I can't begin to express how greatful I am to KTC and so many of you for expecting me to keep my word. In some aspect we are strangers but in othes we are companions experiencing the same journey that non-addict friends can never understand. Thank you!
'worship'
-
HOF + 1 year! HOF is an accomplishment that is achieved with determination and help from the brotherhood.Â
H----help and aid in
O---overcoming and conquering my
F---fear of failure by living the KTC plan ODAAT
That 100 day accomplishment 1 year ago was a very exciting beginning to a very different life for me. After over 14,000 days of being an addict (all of my adult life) living nicotine free has taken a lot of adjustment and is still a struggle at times. It would be easier to fall back to the old ways of doing things rather than learning and growing. I've learned to love the freedom, hate nicotine and what it stole from me. I've learned to dwell on the here and now and let go of most of my past. I still catch myself sneaking back into the past but have those that slap me back into today. The same goes for thinking about the future, when I start questioning if I can make my commitment last I remember that I can do whatever I want TODAY! Yesterday I went on a hike with my 5 yr old grandson, we climbed a steep hill and when we turned around to descend the hill he asked. How do we get down? The answer was as simple as quitting nicotine 'one step at a time.'Â
Today is gone and I was successful in keeping my word. Either late tonight or when I wake in the morning I will recommit to be nicotine free 1 more day. 464 days nicotine free have come and gone in my life, it seems like yesterday that I joined my BOQ. I'll never forget the pain, when I start thinking it wasn't so bad I return to my intro and refresh my memory. I can't begin to express how greatful I am to KTC and so many of you for expecting me to keep my word. In some aspect we are strangers but in othes we are companions experiencing the same journey that non-addict friends can never understand. Thank you!
'worship'
Thanks wt,, you made today a breeze
-
HOF + 1 year! HOF is an accomplishment that is achieved with determination and help from the brotherhood.Â
H----help and aid in
O---overcoming and conquering my
F---fear of failure by living the KTC plan ODAAT
That 100 day accomplishment 1 year ago was a very exciting beginning to a very different life for me. After over 14,000 days of being an addict (all of my adult life) living nicotine free has taken a lot of adjustment and is still a struggle at times. It would be easier to fall back to the old ways of doing things rather than learning and growing. I've learned to love the freedom, hate nicotine and what it stole from me. I've learned to dwell on the here and now and let go of most of my past. I still catch myself sneaking back into the past but have those that slap me back into today. The same goes for thinking about the future, when I start questioning if I can make my commitment last I remember that I can do whatever I want TODAY! Yesterday I went on a hike with my 5 yr old grandson, we climbed a steep hill and when we turned around to descend the hill he asked. How do we get down? The answer was as simple as quitting nicotine 'one step at a time.'Â
Today is gone and I was successful in keeping my word. Either late tonight or when I wake in the morning I will recommit to be nicotine free 1 more day. 464 days nicotine free have come and gone in my life, it seems like yesterday that I joined my BOQ. I'll never forget the pain, when I start thinking it wasn't so bad I return to my intro and refresh my memory. I can't begin to express how greatful I am to KTC and so many of you for expecting me to keep my word. In some aspect we are strangers but in othes we are companions experiencing the same journey that non-addict friends can never understand. Thank you!
'worship'
Thanks wt,, you made today a breeze
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
-
HOF + 1 year! HOF is an accomplishment that is achieved with determination and help from the brotherhood.Â
H----help and aid in
O---overcoming and conquering my
F---fear of failure by living the KTC plan ODAAT
That 100 day accomplishment 1 year ago was a very exciting beginning to a very different life for me. After over 14,000 days of being an addict (all of my adult life) living nicotine free has taken a lot of adjustment and is still a struggle at times. It would be easier to fall back to the old ways of doing things rather than learning and growing. I've learned to love the freedom, hate nicotine and what it stole from me. I've learned to dwell on the here and now and let go of most of my past. I still catch myself sneaking back into the past but have those that slap me back into today. The same goes for thinking about the future, when I start questioning if I can make my commitment last I remember that I can do whatever I want TODAY! Yesterday I went on a hike with my 5 yr old grandson, we climbed a steep hill and when we turned around to descend the hill he asked. How do we get down? The answer was as simple as quitting nicotine 'one step at a time.'Â
Today is gone and I was successful in keeping my word. Either late tonight or when I wake in the morning I will recommit to be nicotine free 1 more day. 464 days nicotine free have come and gone in my life, it seems like yesterday that I joined my BOQ. I'll never forget the pain, when I start thinking it wasn't so bad I return to my intro and refresh my memory. I can't begin to express how greatful I am to KTC and so many of you for expecting me to keep my word. In some aspect we are strangers but in othes we are companions experiencing the same journey that non-addict friends can never understand. Thank you!
'worship'
Thanks wt,, you made today a breeze
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Bravo... encore!
-
HOF + 1 year! HOF is an accomplishment that is achieved with determination and help from the brotherhood.Â
H----help and aid in
O---overcoming and conquering my
F---fear of failure by living the KTC plan ODAAT
That 100 day accomplishment 1 year ago was a very exciting beginning to a very different life for me. After over 14,000 days of being an addict (all of my adult life) living nicotine free has taken a lot of adjustment and is still a struggle at times. It would be easier to fall back to the old ways of doing things rather than learning and growing. I've learned to love the freedom, hate nicotine and what it stole from me. I've learned to dwell on the here and now and let go of most of my past. I still catch myself sneaking back into the past but have those that slap me back into today. The same goes for thinking about the future, when I start questioning if I can make my commitment last I remember that I can do whatever I want TODAY! Yesterday I went on a hike with my 5 yr old grandson, we climbed a steep hill and when we turned around to descend the hill he asked. How do we get down? The answer was as simple as quitting nicotine 'one step at a time.'Â
Today is gone and I was successful in keeping my word. Either late tonight or when I wake in the morning I will recommit to be nicotine free 1 more day. 464 days nicotine free have come and gone in my life, it seems like yesterday that I joined my BOQ. I'll never forget the pain, when I start thinking it wasn't so bad I return to my intro and refresh my memory. I can't begin to express how greatful I am to KTC and so many of you for expecting me to keep my word. In some aspect we are strangers but in othes we are companions experiencing the same journey that non-addict friends can never understand. Thank you!
'worship'
Thanks wt,, you made today a breeze
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
Bravo... encore!
Well said WT! I'll quit with you today and every day...
-
Day 475
I need to record feelings I've been dealing with lately. I've been falling into a depressed state very gradually over several weeks. Recognizing and trying to overcome I noticed my thoughts of dipping and some degree of craving started taking up too much of my thoughts. I know I used nicotine to 'escape' in the past. I have the tools to stay quit but I don't have the tools to cope with deteriorating mental state. Thus the conflict; the tool I used for depression was removed from the toolbox and hasn't been replaced with a substitute. Just saying I recognize I have a huge void which was part of my life for 4 decades, replacing it will take effort and won't happen overnight. KTC is a tool that has been helpful in filling hours of my time but I need more now. It's my opinion that I'm not alone, it seems that those that cave after long pauses haven't replaced their past nicotine usage with a suitable replacement and fall back on what they knew from the past that fulfilled the need. I'm working on finding the answers and replacement activities. I'm open to suggestions.
-
Day 475
I need to record feelings I've been dealing with lately. I've been falling into a depressed state very gradually over several weeks. Recognizing and trying to overcome I noticed my thoughts of dipping and some degree of craving started taking up too much of my thoughts. I know I used nicotine to 'escape' in the past. I have the tools to stay quit but I don't have the tools to cope with deteriorating mental state. Thus the conflict; the tool I used for depression was removed from the toolbox and hasn't been replaced with a substitute. Just saying I recognize I have a huge void which was part of my life for 4 decades, replacing it will take effort and won't happen overnight. KTC is a tool that has been helpful in filling hours of my time but I need more now. It's my opinion that I'm not alone, it seems that those that cave after long pauses haven't replaced their past nicotine usage with a suitable replacement and fall back on what they knew from the past that fulfilled the need. I'm working on finding the answers and replacement activities. I'm open to suggestions.
Back to basics WT. You are allowing the old lies of the nic bitch to be whispered back into your ear.
Nicotine fills no voids in your life, it creates them.
You don't need that shit to fill any voids in your life. You want something to keep your idle hands and mind busy, get a new hobby. Start needlepoint, widdling wood, reading the good book, playing silly video games, crossword puzzles, model making, SOMETHING other than posioning yourself again. You know damn well that shit is only going to lead to more problems.
Also, is it not true that you said previous that USING nicotine caused you depression? In fact was that not the title of your HOF speech, "The missing warning label...this product may cause depression and thoughs of suicide"? I may be wrong as I'm going by pure memory here, but usually my mind/memory is pretty spot on.
Now you are saying nicotine was the tool you used to deal with depression and has been removed from the toolbox? YOU are the one who told ME that brain chemistry is a tricky thing and it was in fact modern medicine that kept your depression in check and that I should investigate the same thing as I became depressed when I quit...and I did, and it worked and may have saved my fucking life . Was/is that not a tool you should be using to deal with that issue, and not nicotine? Have you been diligent on that front of late?
I think you're daydreaming WT. I think youre feeling a little blue, perhaps a little bored and have that falsified gaze of thinking nic can cure what ails ya
BLINK. OR, I'M CLAPPING AS HARD AS I CAN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE ....WAKE UP!!!
You say guys cave after a long time because they haven't found a suitable replacement for the nic bitch. You really believe that? I don't fully.
I believe guys cave after a long time because they start to believe the lies again. That nic is going to make things better, that they can handle just one now and they aren't addicts anymore, that the reward outweighs the risk. In fact I believe I have heard YOU say such things. Again, I could be mistaken but like I said, my memory serves me pretty well and you have taught me A LOT, and when you speak my ears perk up and I listen.
475 days is a long time to be quit, but after 40 years of use I don't think its uncommon to have thoughts like this. In fact its probably very natural and perhaps even healthy for you.
It gives you yet another chance to step back and see nicotine addiction for what it really is. A pack of bullshit lies that will continually pop into your noggin from time to time.
Not sure I helped you much but just putting down how I honestly feel. Hopefully others will do the same and you will have some good stuff to draw from to help get you back to feeling occupied.
We all know damn sure, nicotine ain't the answer.
Diesel out.
-
Day 475
I need to record feelings I've been dealing with lately. I've been falling into a depressed state very gradually over several weeks. Recognizing and trying to overcome I noticed my thoughts of dipping and some degree of craving started taking up too much of my thoughts. I know I used nicotine to 'escape' in the past. I have the tools to stay quit but I don't have the tools to cope with deteriorating mental state. Thus the conflict; the tool I used for depression was removed from the toolbox and hasn't been replaced with a substitute. Just saying I recognize I have a huge void which was part of my life for 4 decades, replacing it will take effort and won't happen overnight. KTC is a tool that has been helpful in filling hours of my time but I need more now. It's my opinion that I'm not alone, it seems that those that cave after long pauses haven't replaced their past nicotine usage with a suitable replacement and fall back on what they knew from the past that fulfilled the need. I'm working on finding the answers and replacement activities. I'm open to suggestions.
Back to basics WT. You are allowing the old lies of the nic bitch to be whispered back into your ear.
Nicotine fills no voids in your life, it creates them.
You don't need that shit to fill any voids in your life. You want something to keep your idle hands and mind busy, get a new hobby. Start needlepoint, widdling wood, reading the good book, playing silly video games, crossword puzzles, model making, SOMETHING other than posioning yourself again. You know damn well that shit is only going to lead to more problems.
Also, is it not true that you said previous that USING nicotine caused you depression? In fact was that not the title of your HOF speech, "The missing warning label...this product may cause depression and thoughs of suicide"? I may be wrong as I'm going by pure memory here, but usually my mind/memory is pretty spot on.
Now you are saying nicotine was the tool you used to deal with depression and has been removed from the toolbox? YOU are the one who told ME that brain chemistry is a tricky thing and it was in fact modern medicine that kept your depression in check and that I should investigate the same thing as I became depressed when I quit...and I did, and it worked and may have saved my fucking life . Was/is that not a tool you should be using to deal with that issue, and not nicotine? Have you been diligent on that front of late?
I think you're daydreaming WT. I think youre feeling a little blue, perhaps a little bored and have that falsified gaze of thinking nic can cure what ails ya
BLINK. OR, I'M CLAPPING AS HARD AS I CAN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE ....WAKE UP!!!
You say guys cave after a long time because they haven't found a suitable replacement for the nic bitch. You really believe that? I don't fully.
I believe guys cave after a long time because they start to believe the lies again. That nic is going to make things better, that they can handle just one now and they aren't addicts anymore, that the reward outweighs the risk. In fact I believe I have heard YOU say such things. Again, I could be mistaken but like I said, my memory serves me pretty well and you have taught me A LOT, and when you speak my ears perk up and I listen.
475 days is a long time to be quit, but after 40 years of use I don't think its uncommon to have thoughts like this. In fact its probably very natural and perhaps even healthy for you.
It gives you yet another chance to step back and see nicotine addiction for what it really is. A pack of bullshit lies that will continually pop into your noggin from time to time.
Not sure I helped you much but just putting down how I honestly feel. Hopefully others will do the same and you will have some good stuff to draw from to help get you back to feeling occupied.
We all know damn sure, nicotine ain't the answer.
Diesel out.
Spot on advice. I think I know the void you are talking about, besides time though what void ? Sitting and spitting, walking and spitting etc you know the different activities you partook and chewed.
Do not believe the lies your addicted mind tells you. The task is to find enjoyment in your life again.
If I can help you let me know. I will say a prayer for you brother.
-
Day 475
I need to record feelings I've been dealing with lately. I've been falling into a depressed state very gradually over several weeks. Recognizing and trying to overcome I noticed my thoughts of dipping and some degree of craving started taking up too much of my thoughts. I know I used nicotine to 'escape' in the past. I have the tools to stay quit but I don't have the tools to cope with deteriorating mental state. Thus the conflict; the tool I used for depression was removed from the toolbox and hasn't been replaced with a substitute. Just saying I recognize I have a huge void which was part of my life for 4 decades, replacing it will take effort and won't happen overnight. KTC is a tool that has been helpful in filling hours of my time but I need more now. It's my opinion that I'm not alone, it seems that those that cave after long pauses haven't replaced their past nicotine usage with a suitable replacement and fall back on what they knew from the past that fulfilled the need. I'm working on finding the answers and replacement activities. I'm open to suggestions.
Back to basics WT. You are allowing the old lies of the nic bitch to be whispered back into your ear.
Nicotine fills no voids in your life, it creates them.
You don't need that shit to fill any voids in your life. You want something to keep your idle hands and mind busy, get a new hobby. Start needlepoint, widdling wood, reading the good book, playing silly video games, crossword puzzles, model making, SOMETHING other than posioning yourself again. You know damn well that shit is only going to lead to more problems.
Also, is it not true that you said previous that USING nicotine caused you depression? In fact was that not the title of your HOF speech, "The missing warning label...this product may cause depression and thoughs of suicide"? I may be wrong as I'm going by pure memory here, but usually my mind/memory is pretty spot on.
Now you are saying nicotine was the tool you used to deal with depression and has been removed from the toolbox? YOU are the one who told ME that brain chemistry is a tricky thing and it was in fact modern medicine that kept your depression in check and that I should investigate the same thing as I became depressed when I quit...and I did, and it worked and may have saved my fucking life . Was/is that not a tool you should be using to deal with that issue, and not nicotine? Have you been diligent on that front of late?
I think you're daydreaming WT. I think youre feeling a little blue, perhaps a little bored and have that falsified gaze of thinking nic can cure what ails ya
BLINK. OR, I'M CLAPPING AS HARD AS I CAN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE ....WAKE UP!!!
You say guys cave after a long time because they haven't found a suitable replacement for the nic bitch. You really believe that? I don't fully.
I believe guys cave after a long time because they start to believe the lies again. That nic is going to make things better, that they can handle just one now and they aren't addicts anymore, that the reward outweighs the risk. In fact I believe I have heard YOU say such things. Again, I could be mistaken but like I said, my memory serves me pretty well and you have taught me A LOT, and when you speak my ears perk up and I listen.
475 days is a long time to be quit, but after 40 years of use I don't think its uncommon to have thoughts like this. In fact its probably very natural and perhaps even healthy for you.
It gives you yet another chance to step back and see nicotine addiction for what it really is. A pack of bullshit lies that will continually pop into your noggin from time to time.
Not sure I helped you much but just putting down how I honestly feel. Hopefully others will do the same and you will have some good stuff to draw from to help get you back to feeling occupied.
We all know damn sure, nicotine ain't the answer.
Diesel out.
Spot on advice. I think I know the void you are talking about, besides time though what void ? Sitting and spitting, walking and spitting etc you know the different activities you partook and chewed.
Do not believe the lies your addicted mind tells you. The task is to find enjoyment in your life again.
If I can help you let me know. I will say a prayer for you brother.
475 days, wow. Do you, or have you ever played guitar?? It is something i started doing about 10 years ago. something I have really enjoyed and you will be surprised how much time it kills. When you first start learning the time and places your mind travels are amazing.
Wait, i'm to old for the guitar. False!
Wait, I can't because my fingers are to chubby. False!
Wait, I can't because my fingers are to short. False!
There is also a lot of instruments out there that will help if guitar doesn't suit you.
Keyboard, violin, harmonica, cello. These are just a few. I could see you playing a violin,, sure.
Just throwing this out there. You may be an accomplished instrumentalist already. Glad to be quit with you WT...
-
Day 475
I need to record feelings I've been dealing with lately. I've been falling into a depressed state very gradually over several weeks. Recognizing and trying to overcome I noticed my thoughts of dipping and some degree of craving started taking up too much of my thoughts. I know I used nicotine to 'escape' in the past. I have the tools to stay quit but I don't have the tools to cope with deteriorating mental state. Thus the conflict; the tool I used for depression was removed from the toolbox and hasn't been replaced with a substitute. Just saying I recognize I have a huge void which was part of my life for 4 decades, replacing it will take effort and won't happen overnight. KTC is a tool that has been helpful in filling hours of my time but I need more now. It's my opinion that I'm not alone, it seems that those that cave after long pauses haven't replaced their past nicotine usage with a suitable replacement and fall back on what they knew from the past that fulfilled the need. I'm working on finding the answers and replacement activities. I'm open to suggestions.
Back to basics WT. You are allowing the old lies of the nic bitch to be whispered back into your ear.
Nicotine fills no voids in your life, it creates them.
You don't need that shit to fill any voids in your life. You want something to keep your idle hands and mind busy, get a new hobby. Start needlepoint, widdling wood, reading the good book, playing silly video games, crossword puzzles, model making, SOMETHING other than posioning yourself again. You know damn well that shit is only going to lead to more problems.
Also, is it not true that you said previous that USING nicotine caused you depression? In fact was that not the title of your HOF speech, "The missing warning label...this product may cause depression and thoughs of suicide"? I may be wrong as I'm going by pure memory here, but usually my mind/memory is pretty spot on.
Now you are saying nicotine was the tool you used to deal with depression and has been removed from the toolbox? YOU are the one who told ME that brain chemistry is a tricky thing and it was in fact modern medicine that kept your depression in check and that I should investigate the same thing as I became depressed when I quit...and I did, and it worked and may have saved my fucking life . Was/is that not a tool you should be using to deal with that issue, and not nicotine? Have you been diligent on that front of late?
I think you're daydreaming WT. I think youre feeling a little blue, perhaps a little bored and have that falsified gaze of thinking nic can cure what ails ya
BLINK. OR, I'M CLAPPING AS HARD AS I CAN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE ....WAKE UP!!!
You say guys cave after a long time because they haven't found a suitable replacement for the nic bitch. You really believe that? I don't fully.
I believe guys cave after a long time because they start to believe the lies again. That nic is going to make things better, that they can handle just one now and they aren't addicts anymore, that the reward outweighs the risk. In fact I believe I have heard YOU say such things. Again, I could be mistaken but like I said, my memory serves me pretty well and you have taught me A LOT, and when you speak my ears perk up and I listen.
475 days is a long time to be quit, but after 40 years of use I don't think its uncommon to have thoughts like this. In fact its probably very natural and perhaps even healthy for you.
It gives you yet another chance to step back and see nicotine addiction for what it really is. A pack of bullshit lies that will continually pop into your noggin from time to time.
Not sure I helped you much but just putting down how I honestly feel. Hopefully others will do the same and you will have some good stuff to draw from to help get you back to feeling occupied.
We all know damn sure, nicotine ain't the answer.
Diesel out.
Spot on advice. I think I know the void you are talking about, besides time though what void ? Sitting and spitting, walking and spitting etc you know the different activities you partook and chewed.
Do not believe the lies your addicted mind tells you. The task is to find enjoyment in your life again.
If I can help you let me know. I will say a prayer for you brother.
475 days, wow. Do you, or have you ever played guitar?? It is something i started doing about 10 years ago. something I have really enjoyed and you will be surprised how much time it kills. When you first start learning the time and places your mind travels are amazing.
Wait, i'm to old for the guitar. False!
Wait, I can't because my fingers are to chubby. False!
Wait, I can't because my fingers are to short. False!
There is also a lot of instruments out there that will help if guitar doesn't suit you.
Keyboard, violin, harmonica, cello. These are just a few. I could see you playing a violin,, sure.
Just throwing this out there. You may be an accomplished instrumentalist already. Glad to be quit with you WT...
Good idea. I hear wedge plays a mean Hungarian crotch bugle. Maybe he can give you some lessons?
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Day 475
I need to record feelings I've been dealing with lately. I've been falling into a depressed state very gradually over several weeks. Recognizing and trying to overcome I noticed my thoughts of dipping and some degree of craving started taking up too much of my thoughts. I know I used nicotine to 'escape' in the past. I have the tools to stay quit but I don't have the tools to cope with deteriorating mental state. Thus the conflict; the tool I used for depression was removed from the toolbox and hasn't been replaced with a substitute. Just saying I recognize I have a huge void which was part of my life for 4 decades, replacing it will take effort and won't happen overnight. KTC is a tool that has been helpful in filling hours of my time but I need more now. It's my opinion that I'm not alone, it seems that those that cave after long pauses haven't replaced their past nicotine usage with a suitable replacement and fall back on what they knew from the past that fulfilled the need. I'm working on finding the answers and replacement activities. I'm open to suggestions.
Back to basics WT. You are allowing the old lies of the nic bitch to be whispered back into your ear.
Nicotine fills no voids in your life, it creates them.
You don't need that shit to fill any voids in your life. You want something to keep your idle hands and mind busy, get a new hobby. Start needlepoint, widdling wood, reading the good book, playing silly video games, crossword puzzles, model making, SOMETHING other than posioning yourself again. You know damn well that shit is only going to lead to more problems.
Also, is it not true that you said previous that USING nicotine caused you depression? In fact was that not the title of your HOF speech, "The missing warning label...this product may cause depression and thoughs of suicide"? I may be wrong as I'm going by pure memory here, but usually my mind/memory is pretty spot on.
Now you are saying nicotine was the tool you used to deal with depression and has been removed from the toolbox? YOU are the one who told ME that brain chemistry is a tricky thing and it was in fact modern medicine that kept your depression in check and that I should investigate the same thing as I became depressed when I quit...and I did, and it worked and may have saved my fucking life . Was/is that not a tool you should be using to deal with that issue, and not nicotine? Have you been diligent on that front of late?
I think you're daydreaming WT. I think youre feeling a little blue, perhaps a little bored and have that falsified gaze of thinking nic can cure what ails ya
BLINK. OR, I'M CLAPPING AS HARD AS I CAN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE ....WAKE UP!!!
You say guys cave after a long time because they haven't found a suitable replacement for the nic bitch. You really believe that? I don't fully.
I believe guys cave after a long time because they start to believe the lies again. That nic is going to make things better, that they can handle just one now and they aren't addicts anymore, that the reward outweighs the risk. In fact I believe I have heard YOU say such things. Again, I could be mistaken but like I said, my memory serves me pretty well and you have taught me A LOT, and when you speak my ears perk up and I listen.
475 days is a long time to be quit, but after 40 years of use I don't think its uncommon to have thoughts like this. In fact its probably very natural and perhaps even healthy for you.
It gives you yet another chance to step back and see nicotine addiction for what it really is. A pack of bullshit lies that will continually pop into your noggin from time to time.
Not sure I helped you much but just putting down how I honestly feel. Hopefully others will do the same and you will have some good stuff to draw from to help get you back to feeling occupied.
We all know damn sure, nicotine ain't the answer.
Diesel out.
Spot on advice. I think I know the void you are talking about, besides time though what void ? Sitting and spitting, walking and spitting etc you know the different activities you partook and chewed.
Do not believe the lies your addicted mind tells you. The task is to find enjoyment in your life again.
If I can help you let me know. I will say a prayer for you brother.
475 days, wow. Do you, or have you ever played guitar?? It is something i started doing about 10 years ago. something I have really enjoyed and you will be surprised how much time it kills. When you first start learning the time and places your mind travels are amazing.
Wait, i'm to old for the guitar. False!
Wait, I can't because my fingers are to chubby. False!
Wait, I can't because my fingers are to short. False!
There is also a lot of instruments out there that will help if guitar doesn't suit you.
Keyboard, violin, harmonica, cello. These are just a few. I could see you playing a violin,, sure.
Just throwing this out there. You may be an accomplished instrumentalist already. Glad to be quit with you WT...
Good idea. I hear wedge plays a mean Hungarian crotch bugle. Maybe he can give you some lessons?
Thanks guys. That's why I posted, I needed a kick in the nuts to wake me up. Not in danger of caving and never was just feeling sorry for myself. That damn bitch always knows and recognizes our weak moments. Lets all have a great quit weekend! Out!!
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Day 475
I need to record feelings I've been dealing with lately. I've been falling into a depressed state very gradually over several weeks. Recognizing and trying to overcome I noticed my thoughts of dipping and some degree of craving started taking up too much of my thoughts. I know I used nicotine to 'escape' in the past. I have the tools to stay quit but I don't have the tools to cope with deteriorating mental state. Thus the conflict; the tool I used for depression was removed from the toolbox and hasn't been replaced with a substitute. Just saying I recognize I have a huge void which was part of my life for 4 decades, replacing it will take effort and won't happen overnight. KTC is a tool that has been helpful in filling hours of my time but I need more now. It's my opinion that I'm not alone, it seems that those that cave after long pauses haven't replaced their past nicotine usage with a suitable replacement and fall back on what they knew from the past that fulfilled the need. I'm working on finding the answers and replacement activities. I'm open to suggestions.
Back to basics WT. You are allowing the old lies of the nic bitch to be whispered back into your ear.
Nicotine fills no voids in your life, it creates them.
You don't need that shit to fill any voids in your life. You want something to keep your idle hands and mind busy, get a new hobby. Start needlepoint, widdling wood, reading the good book, playing silly video games, crossword puzzles, model making, SOMETHING other than posioning yourself again. You know damn well that shit is only going to lead to more problems.
Also, is it not true that you said previous that USING nicotine caused you depression? In fact was that not the title of your HOF speech, "The missing warning label...this product may cause depression and thoughs of suicide"? I may be wrong as I'm going by pure memory here, but usually my mind/memory is pretty spot on.
Now you are saying nicotine was the tool you used to deal with depression and has been removed from the toolbox? YOU are the one who told ME that brain chemistry is a tricky thing and it was in fact modern medicine that kept your depression in check and that I should investigate the same thing as I became depressed when I quit...and I did, and it worked and may have saved my fucking life . Was/is that not a tool you should be using to deal with that issue, and not nicotine? Have you been diligent on that front of late?
I think you're daydreaming WT. I think youre feeling a little blue, perhaps a little bored and have that falsified gaze of thinking nic can cure what ails ya
BLINK. OR, I'M CLAPPING AS HARD AS I CAN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE ....WAKE UP!!!
You say guys cave after a long time because they haven't found a suitable replacement for the nic bitch. You really believe that? I don't fully.
I believe guys cave after a long time because they start to believe the lies again. That nic is going to make things better, that they can handle just one now and they aren't addicts anymore, that the reward outweighs the risk. In fact I believe I have heard YOU say such things. Again, I could be mistaken but like I said, my memory serves me pretty well and you have taught me A LOT, and when you speak my ears perk up and I listen.
475 days is a long time to be quit, but after 40 years of use I don't think its uncommon to have thoughts like this. In fact its probably very natural and perhaps even healthy for you.
It gives you yet another chance to step back and see nicotine addiction for what it really is. A pack of bullshit lies that will continually pop into your noggin from time to time.
Not sure I helped you much but just putting down how I honestly feel. Hopefully others will do the same and you will have some good stuff to draw from to help get you back to feeling occupied.
We all know damn sure, nicotine ain't the answer.
Diesel out.
Spot on advice. I think I know the void you are talking about, besides time though what void ? Sitting and spitting, walking and spitting etc you know the different activities you partook and chewed.
Do not believe the lies your addicted mind tells you. The task is to find enjoyment in your life again.
If I can help you let me know. I will say a prayer for you brother.
475 days, wow. Do you, or have you ever played guitar?? It is something i started doing about 10 years ago. something I have really enjoyed and you will be surprised how much time it kills. When you first start learning the time and places your mind travels are amazing.
Wait, i'm to old for the guitar. False!
Wait, I can't because my fingers are to chubby. False!
Wait, I can't because my fingers are to short. False!
There is also a lot of instruments out there that will help if guitar doesn't suit you.
Keyboard, violin, harmonica, cello. These are just a few. I could see you playing a violin,, sure.
Just throwing this out there. You may be an accomplished instrumentalist already. Glad to be quit with you WT...
Good idea. I hear wedge plays a mean Hungarian crotch bugle. Maybe he can give you some lessons?
Thanks guys. That's why I posted, I needed a kick in the nuts to wake me up. Not in danger of caving and never was just feeling sorry for myself. That damn bitch always knows and recognizes our weak moments. Lets all have a great quit weekend! Out!!
Sounds like boredom, and the inability to relax.. This is something I've struggled with as well. Most people on here are drinkers.. Nothing wrong with that, but I don't drink. Tobacco alcohol was a way for me to relax, so I simply had to find another way..
When I hit the 3rd floor I also needed a new goal. So 2 birds one stone and spot -on (srans) I started playing the guitar. Hawaiian slack key- It's the most beautiful music I've ever heard, and it happens to be guitar as well. I just got back from vacation and couldn't take my guitar. It's all I could think about.
Last week my son said, (Hey dad, it sounds like music now) I actually played a whole song from a book. My point is nothing is impossible, and we just need to find those things that TRULY make us happy. peace
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Day 475
I need to record feelings I've been dealing with lately. I've been falling into a depressed state very gradually over several weeks. Recognizing and trying to overcome I noticed my thoughts of dipping and some degree of craving started taking up too much of my thoughts. I know I used nicotine to 'escape' in the past. I have the tools to stay quit but I don't have the tools to cope with deteriorating mental state. Thus the conflict; the tool I used for depression was removed from the toolbox and hasn't been replaced with a substitute. Just saying I recognize I have a huge void which was part of my life for 4 decades, replacing it will take effort and won't happen overnight. KTC is a tool that has been helpful in filling hours of my time but I need more now. It's my opinion that I'm not alone, it seems that those that cave after long pauses haven't replaced their past nicotine usage with a suitable replacement and fall back on what they knew from the past that fulfilled the need. I'm working on finding the answers and replacement activities. I'm open to suggestions.
Back to basics WT. You are allowing the old lies of the nic bitch to be whispered back into your ear.
Nicotine fills no voids in your life, it creates them.
You don't need that shit to fill any voids in your life. You want something to keep your idle hands and mind busy, get a new hobby. Start needlepoint, widdling wood, reading the good book, playing silly video games, crossword puzzles, model making, SOMETHING other than posioning yourself again. You know damn well that shit is only going to lead to more problems.
Also, is it not true that you said previous that USING nicotine caused you depression? In fact was that not the title of your HOF speech, "The missing warning label...this product may cause depression and thoughs of suicide"? I may be wrong as I'm going by pure memory here, but usually my mind/memory is pretty spot on.
Now you are saying nicotine was the tool you used to deal with depression and has been removed from the toolbox? YOU are the one who told ME that brain chemistry is a tricky thing and it was in fact modern medicine that kept your depression in check and that I should investigate the same thing as I became depressed when I quit...and I did, and it worked and may have saved my fucking life . Was/is that not a tool you should be using to deal with that issue, and not nicotine? Have you been diligent on that front of late?
I think you're daydreaming WT. I think youre feeling a little blue, perhaps a little bored and have that falsified gaze of thinking nic can cure what ails ya
BLINK. OR, I'M CLAPPING AS HARD AS I CAN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE ....WAKE UP!!!
You say guys cave after a long time because they haven't found a suitable replacement for the nic bitch. You really believe that? I don't fully.
I believe guys cave after a long time because they start to believe the lies again. That nic is going to make things better, that they can handle just one now and they aren't addicts anymore, that the reward outweighs the risk. In fact I believe I have heard YOU say such things. Again, I could be mistaken but like I said, my memory serves me pretty well and you have taught me A LOT, and when you speak my ears perk up and I listen.
475 days is a long time to be quit, but after 40 years of use I don't think its uncommon to have thoughts like this. In fact its probably very natural and perhaps even healthy for you.
It gives you yet another chance to step back and see nicotine addiction for what it really is. A pack of bullshit lies that will continually pop into your noggin from time to time.
Not sure I helped you much but just putting down how I honestly feel. Hopefully others will do the same and you will have some good stuff to draw from to help get you back to feeling occupied.
We all know damn sure, nicotine ain't the answer.
Diesel out.
Spot on advice. I think I know the void you are talking about, besides time though what void ? Sitting and spitting, walking and spitting etc you know the different activities you partook and chewed.
Do not believe the lies your addicted mind tells you. The task is to find enjoyment in your life again.
If I can help you let me know. I will say a prayer for you brother.
475 days, wow. Do you, or have you ever played guitar?? It is something i started doing about 10 years ago. something I have really enjoyed and you will be surprised how much time it kills. When you first start learning the time and places your mind travels are amazing.
Wait, i'm to old for the guitar. False!
Wait, I can't because my fingers are to chubby. False!
Wait, I can't because my fingers are to short. False!
There is also a lot of instruments out there that will help if guitar doesn't suit you.
Keyboard, violin, harmonica, cello. These are just a few. I could see you playing a violin,, sure.
Just throwing this out there. You may be an accomplished instrumentalist already. Glad to be quit with you WT...
Good idea. I hear wedge plays a mean Hungarian crotch bugle. Maybe he can give you some lessons?
Thanks guys. That's why I posted, I needed a kick in the nuts to wake me up. Not in danger of caving and never was just feeling sorry for myself. That damn bitch always knows and recognizes our weak moments. Lets all have a great quit weekend! Out!!
Sounds like boredom, and the inability to relax.. This is something I've struggled with as well. Most people on here are drinkers.. Nothing wrong with that, but I don't drink. Tobacco alcohol was a way for me to relax, so I simply had to find another way..
When I hit the 3rd floor I also needed a new goal. So 2 birds one stone and spot -on (srans) I started playing the guitar. Hawaiian slack key- It's the most beautiful music I've ever heard, and it happens to be guitar as well. I just got back from vacation and couldn't take my guitar. It's all I could think about.
Last week my son said, (Hey dad, it sounds like music now) I actually played a whole song from a book. My point is nothing is impossible, and we just need to find those things that TRULY make us happy. peace
One day at a time WT57. I am sorry that your feeling this way, but be assured it is perfectly normal. I still have the same the type of feelings. I have actually been thinking about talking to this therapist at my work, (social worker?) It is called the Associate Assistance Program. Have you ever used any professional services such as that? I have not, but I am considering it. Keep killing it WT, and keep helping newbs, I cant even begin to tell you how helpful you have been to me.
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WHY QUIT.
Quit brothers and sisters, I have had something on my mind since day 1, actually I have thought about it for years. People quit for different reasons, something that bother one person dosenÂ’t bother another. I apologize in advance if this gets to lengthy. IÂ’ll try to condense it as much as possible.
Like most of you over the years IÂ’ve checked my mouth for sores especially when my mouth hurt. Afraid of getting cancer was always in the back of my mind but not a motivation to quit. Even after losing many teeth, still no motivation. Pictures of cancer victims didnÂ’t do it either. That brings me to my story that shows how stupid IÂ’ve been.
As an invincible 20 something I had a neighbor who was in his mid 80’s we had been hunting buddies, 'Remshot' Roe chewed A LOT and he got mouth cancer. I would go and set with him to give his wife a break. He wouldn’t go to the Dr. or take pain meds. He got a big hole in the side of his face and his wife would pick bone and teeth out daily. His jaw quit working and couldn’t open his mouth no problem he had a hole in his face to pour soup into. After feeding him his wife would clean the hole, pour ½ a can of Copenhagen in and cover it with a kotex, and then bandage his whole face back up. This whole f—king time I would set there with him and have a big fatty in my mouth. He lasted a little over a year after he first got the cancer and it was HELL!! Why would I continue?
My motivation to quit has been completely unrelated to the fear of cancer. IÂ’ve lived a life of very deep depression and used the chew as a way to cope with life, I thought. Not so: my addiction has proved to do just the opposite it has made me even more depressed because I always tried to hide it from my family and friends. Yes IÂ’ve been a ninja dipper for almost 40 yrs. Over the past 3 weeks I have found that I am finally free of my secret life and open to talk about my addiction with you and my family. My depression is leaving me each day a little at a time as I quit each day.
I feel a profound obligation to do anything that I can to help younger addicts quit while they are still young. I donÂ’t want to see anyone be as stupid as I have been! I donÂ’t care what your motivation is if you have quit stay quit with me!! If you are reading this and havenÂ’t quit, throw that shit away and run to post your quit NOW. There are always reasons to wait until tomorrow, but tomorrow never comes it just move on to the next tomorrow. I know this better than anyone I've had over 13,000 tomorrows. But now I've had 22 todays, I dont want to look back or ahead all that is important to me right now is TODAY and I QUIT AGAIN!!!!
Bumping this up-
Newbs- middles- vets- I have only made it this far on WT's thread but it is full of Q.U.I.T. get in here and soak it in- learn it and then live it.
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Day 50 a road marker? Day 100 a milestone? 1 year another milestone?
These questions have been plaguing my mind this week. I have been comparing my quit to my life.
Life.......................Quit
Birth-------------------Day 1-------------- a beginning
1st steps--------------Day 50-------------a good start
1st day of school-----Day 100-----------a road marker
Out on your own-----1 yr-----------------a milestone
marriage kids-----
Grandkids-------------
Retirement------------
Death------------------Death(still quit)--------------Triumph
My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it. I don't know what the life expectancy of a quit addict in my demographics is, I have longevity genes so lets say 80 yrs old. That means that I am way past 1/2 way to DEAD. I have had many side trips, detours, road markers and milestones in my life. Today I consider 50 days ago (the day I quit) as one of the milestones in my life that I will cherish with some of the bigger events in my life (such as marriage, birth of daughter, birth of grandkids etc.). If I put myself at the end, at death, I don't think day 50 or day 100 will even be listed on the event calendar, Maybe I'm wrong but I don't think so.
Looking down the road into the future has been one of the more difficult aspects to deal with in my quit! When I think long term I "CAVE". I'm strong, my quit is strong, I'm gaining something I've never had "integrity", I will not cave if I continue to quit 1 day at a time.
Another scary aspect of 50 or 100 days quit is when I compare it to the past: I've been a addict for over 14,000 days I've been alive a little over 20,000 days. Compare that to 100 days-----not even a drop in the bucket. So another lesson to be learned the past can also be overwhelming, thinking of it sows seeds of "CAVE".
My conclusion is: THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS TODAY.
hmmm- I am experiencing the same feelings- more proof that I am not special in this addiction
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Am I an ADDICT OR DO I HAVE A HABIT??
I have seen this bantered about here on KTC since I first joined and people often mistakenly say that they have the bad habit of nicotine use. The putting nicotine into the body is definitely an addiction! I have been addicted to nicotine for years and my use is perfectly described in the following definition of Addiction. If you read further the definition of a Habit, my use of smokeless tobacco I contend was a habit. The main reason that I use to prove that it was a habit is that the use of fake dip wouldn't do any good for the addiction but it would satisfy the habit. I used fake dip for the first 50- 60 days of my quit on a regular basis, and then it just started becoming more of an annoyance. Now I keep it around for when my addiction causes me to crave the nicotine. The fake dip tricks my body into thinking that I'm feeding it the same thing It desires and wants. When in reality all I'm doing is giving it that placebo. This is exactly why the use of patches, gum, nasal sprays or any other form of nicotine is totally not acceptable, because they continue to feed the addiction. It is also why products like fake dip, seeds, gum, cat shit or whatever are acceptable the satisfy the habit but provide no nicotine for the addiction.
Definition of ADDICTION
1 the quality or state of being addicted
2 compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal; broadly: persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful
Definition of HABIT
1. an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary: the habit of looking both ways before crossing the street.
2. customary practice or use: Daily bathing is an American habit.
3. a particular practice, custom, or usage: the habit of shaking hands.
4. a dominant or regular disposition or tendency; prevailing character or quality: She has a habit of looking at the bright side of things.
Sorry to keep bumping stuff up but this is some of the most intelligent stuff I have read on this site to date.
I promise only one or two more bumps- I need to get other quitters that want to QLF ( I will refrain from using profanity on your thread).
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This is for my fellow July Freedom lovin' Junkies (The Brotherhood of Quit)
I posted there but I wanted to make sure my challenge didn't get lost.
Quitters I've been struggling with a question the past few days. As most of you know I've been an addict for nearly 40 years and had many attempts to quit. Some of my attempts have lasted days, weeks and one even lasted 3 1/2 years. So the question: What is different this time? And I can say with true conviction it is different, I feel it, I know it and I am totally convinced that it is forever. That doesn't mean that I don't have to be here everyday and make that promise and commitment, I DO! As July has passed the 1/2 way point in the month and many of us have reached the Hall my excitement for each one of us as our day approaches intensifies. It doesn't matter if it is Kubrick's 117 or Liberdaves 86 The excitement is the same we are brothers!
Back to my question and why I'm asking it of myself. I believe that it has been spurred on by some caves! I have started questioning my commitment! I think the bitch has been trying all the windows and doors trying to find a opening into my quit. I had all of my canned answers as to why I quit but what was the real reason and what makes it different from all the other feeble attempts?
I have concluded that there isn't just one answer but several:
1. I was truly ready to quit, I wanted it, I had actually wanted it for about 6 months. But I hadn't tried because I couldn't live with another failed attempt, I already felt like a total failure at everything.
2. I didn't do it for my wife, even though I felt a need to be there for her through her daily health challenges. But I brought her into it with me after the ceremonial flushing of the dip and my morning process were over.
3. Probably the most important reason it is successful for me is that I brought my Savior into the process with me, (He brought me into the process by leading me to KTC) I have got to say that many of the previous times I had prayed for help but I wanted Him to do the work while I stood back and watched. I doesn't work that way!
4. KTC, it works! BROTHERHOOD ACCOUNTABILITY = SUCCESS. Reaching the 100 day mark is true accomplishment in our addicted lives, but it isn't a reason to slack off. If anything it is more vital that we stick close together.
I don't know if I will ever reach the point of feeling safe to go without posting roll. For now that doesn't matter, I need it. I'm not able to live a nicotine free life without having an army behind me to help me with the daily battles! I know that is true for most if not all of us and challenge you to join with me in committing to 200 days! Men we have come too far to let our guard down, The war has just begun, lets join together to continue fighting the daily battles that present themselves.
Many of you have added your names to the top of the page committing to the 200 days lets get everyone there!
I think I promised I would only bump 1 -2 more so after this I have one left. this is pure quit.
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Comrades, I am so humbled this night to be counted as a quitter with each of you. 300 nights ago I sat on the floor by the toilet and cried as I dumped my last 3 cans of Copenhagen into the bowl and flushed it. The next morning I woke up and wrote this:
This is probably the most I will ever have to say, believe it or not I'm a really quiet guy, kind of Introverted.
'crackup' I haven't shut up since!
Every morning, usually very early I have joined my Brothers of Quit in making a promise to stay nicotine free. Every night, I've shown back up to check on my friends. Along this journey we have lost a number of quitters that started strong and caved to the deceit of the false promises of nicotine addiction. Some of these addicts are still among my friends and I still text them from time to time to be there when their strength grows. None of us can stand to watch a cave but I hope I've always separated the cave from the caver because I've been that weak assed addict for going on 40 years.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven..
My season to quit took many years to arrive. That night 302 days ago that I was lead to KTC, I knew it was my time. It took me 2 nights to cave to the pressure of overwhelming feeling of that time to quit had arrived. 'qt'
This past month has been a very interesting part of my quit, with numerous lessons and feelings. I had a fellow addict that i had quit with daily for 250 days made a conscious decision to cave. I was deeply hurt, I took it personal for awhile. I realize I control 1 quit, mine!
One post that hit me was by Mthomas, on Shame of an addict. (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=93&st=90). I still haven't fully absorbed this concept but recognize it so well.
The another epic post Oral Surgeon Visit Today, By CDaniels (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=7796) that reminds us all of the blessings we have and the vulnerabilities we have.
Now I take that step onto the third floor with humility and pride. I recognize each milestone I've reached couldn't have happened without so many of you. I also remember the terrible pain I've suffered in quitting. The detox and withdrawal was definitely painful and sucked but that pain was minimal when compared to letting go of some of the life experiences that l hid from in my addiction. Even the past 3 days I've recognized another element of my life that has been and is holding me back. So many of us have found we had to change aspects of our lives we never associated with our addiction. My most recent discovery is the most painful yet and I'm not sure I'm ready to face it but I will continue to quit everyday and eventually I can work on accepting other changes.
Thanks to everyone and again today I quit with each and everyone of you that are committing to quit today.
Well, this is my last bump, as promised. I think its a great post and when I am finished with Wade's thread I am going to follow that link to MT's thread and get some learnin' there too. I need to head to bed now so I will have to finish the last page tomorrow.
WT57- you are the reason this site works. Thank you for posting very real, very personal, and very inspiring thoughts/feelings/insights. I am proud to quit with people like you and many others on this site. I hope now that you see how much integrity you have and that you inspire it in others that want it. I want this quit more than anything, that is why I am drinking the kool-aide and doing it one day (unit) at a time.
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I will Quit Like Fuck with you Dougie. And I also won't hesitate to say quit like fuck in wt57's thread.
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I will Quit Like Fuck with you Dougie. And I also won't hesitate to say quit like fuck in wt57's thread.
Thanks coach! I'll QLF with you too!
Dougie I'm glad you find something that I've said that can help you but I'll tell you most everything I write down is for me to remember the suck of quitting and why I never want to repeat it. I'm too old to go through this again. I thought 1 year ago after HOF that I'd be done posting soon. That didn't happen and for me can't. I never missed a day for 1 year and then tried backing off and couldn't do it. Why? 2 reasons; first, I need the daily promise lest I forget and let the bitch get a toe in the door. Second, I need to pay forward what I've received. I'm kinda addicted to KTC and the brotherhood! Trading KTC for nicotine isn't a bad trade at all.
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After 500 days I went to an addiction recovery meeting last night. It was a general addiction meeting based on AA 12 step. As I sat in the meeting surrounded by a drug dealing addict, alcoholics and those with eating disorders I caught myself comparing one addiction to another. Is my addiction less offensive because its legal? Is their addiction less understandable, because they are so foolish for not recognizing how stupid their actions are? Dammit, how can I be so damn stupid! Haven't I learned anything over the past year! I am exactly like every other addict out there, a slave to an action or substance. Are some addictions easier to gain control of? Well, hell yes! My addiction is nicotine and I'd find making myself puck really easy to overcome but the addict with a eating disorder has every bit as difficult time controlling their actions as I have had. We each have our own individual weaknesses and strengths. I still can't believe how I sat there and had those judgmental thoughts about another's addiction. After thinking about it all day I've come to the conclusion that my addicted mind that has been trying to drag me back towards slavery on a regular basis found a way to minimize my addiction by making those other addicts addiction seem so much worse than my own. That is complete bullshit, for me I am a recovering alcoholic of 33+ years and a recovering nicotine addict of 500+ days and my addictions are mine (they are MY weaknesses). Who am I to judge another. I still can't believe I (a dumb ass that use to suck on ground up rotten stinking weeds with brown drool running out the corners of his mouth) judged my addiction less offensive than someone else's. 'bang head' 'bang head'
An addict is an addict!
-
After 500 days I went to an addiction recovery meeting last night. It was a general addiction meeting based on AA 12 step. As I sat in the meeting surrounded by a drug dealing addict, alcoholics and those with eating disorders I caught myself comparing one addiction to another. Is my addiction less offensive because its legal? Is their addiction less understandable, because they are so foolish for not recognizing how stupid their actions are? Dammit, how can I be so damn stupid! Haven't I learned anything over the past year! I am exactly like every other addict out there, a slave to an action or substance. Are some addictions easier to gain control of? Well, hell yes! My addiction is nicotine and I'd find making myself puck really easy to overcome but the addict with a eating disorder has every bit as difficult time controlling their actions as I have had. We each have our own individual weaknesses and strengths. I still can't believe how I sat there and had those judgmental thoughts about another's addiction. After thinking about it all day I've come to the conclusion that my addicted mind that has been trying to drag me back towards slavery on a regular basis found a way to minimize my addiction by making those other addicts addiction seem so much worse than my own. That is complete bullshit, for me I am a recovering alcoholic of 33+ years and a recovering nicotine addict of 500+ days and my addictions are mine (they are MY weaknesses). Who am I to judge another. I still can't believe I (a dumb ass that use to suck on ground up rotten stinking weeds with brown drool running out the corners of his mouth) judged my addiction less offensive than someone else's. 'bang head' 'bang head'
An addict is an addict!
I love you bro!
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After 500 days I went to an addiction recovery meeting last night. It was a general addiction meeting based on AA 12 step. As I sat in the meeting surrounded by a drug dealing addict, alcoholics and those with eating disorders I caught myself comparing one addiction to another. Is my addiction less offensive because its legal? Is their addiction less understandable, because they are so foolish for not recognizing how stupid their actions are? Dammit, how can I be so damn stupid! Haven't I learned anything over the past year! I am exactly like every other addict out there, a slave to an action or substance. Are some addictions easier to gain control of? Well, hell yes! My addiction is nicotine and I'd find making myself puck really easy to overcome but the addict with a eating disorder has every bit as difficult time controlling their actions as I have had. We each have our own individual weaknesses and strengths. I still can't believe how I sat there and had those judgmental thoughts about another's addiction. After thinking about it all day I've come to the conclusion that my addicted mind that has been trying to drag me back towards slavery on a regular basis found a way to minimize my addiction by making those other addicts addiction seem so much worse than my own. That is complete bullshit, for me I am a recovering alcoholic of 33+ years and a recovering nicotine addict of 500+ days and my addictions are mine (they are MY weaknesses). Who am I to judge another. I still can't believe I (a dumb ass that use to suck on ground up rotten stinking weeds with brown drool running out the corners of his mouth) judged my addiction less offensive than someone else's. 'bang head' 'bang head'
An addict is an addict!
I love you bro!
Amen WT57. I also must sonstantly remind myself.
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After 500 days I went to an addiction recovery meeting last night. It was a general addiction meeting based on AA 12 step. As I sat in the meeting surrounded by a drug dealing addict, alcoholics and those with eating disorders I caught myself comparing one addiction to another. Is my addiction less offensive because its legal? Is their addiction less understandable, because they are so foolish for not recognizing how stupid their actions are? Dammit, how can I be so damn stupid! Haven't I learned anything over the past year! I am exactly like every other addict out there, a slave to an action or substance. Are some addictions easier to gain control of? Well, hell yes! My addiction is nicotine and I'd find making myself puck really easy to overcome but the addict with a eating disorder has every bit as difficult time controlling their actions as I have had. We each have our own individual weaknesses and strengths. I still can't believe how I sat there and had those judgmental thoughts about another's addiction. After thinking about it all day I've come to the conclusion that my addicted mind that has been trying to drag me back towards slavery on a regular basis found a way to minimize my addiction by making those other addicts addiction seem so much worse than my own. That is complete bullshit, for me I am a recovering alcoholic of 33+ years and a recovering nicotine addict of 500+ days and my addictions are mine (they are MY weaknesses). Who am I to judge another.  I still can't believe I (a dumb ass that use to suck on ground up rotten stinking weeds with brown drool running out the corners of his mouth) judged my addiction less offensive than someone else's. 'bang head' 'bang head'
An addict is an addict!
I love you bro!
Amen WT57. I also must sonstantly remind myself.
Ditto ^^
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After 500 days I went to an addiction recovery meeting last night. It was a general addiction meeting based on AA 12 step. As I sat in the meeting surrounded by a drug dealing addict, alcoholics and those with eating disorders I caught myself comparing one addiction to another. Is my addiction less offensive because its legal? Is their addiction less understandable, because they are so foolish for not recognizing how stupid their actions are? Dammit, how can I be so damn stupid! Haven't I learned anything over the past year! I am exactly like every other addict out there, a slave to an action or substance. Are some addictions easier to gain control of? Well, hell yes! My addiction is nicotine and I'd find making myself puck really easy to overcome but the addict with a eating disorder has every bit as difficult time controlling their actions as I have had. We each have our own individual weaknesses and strengths. I still can't believe how I sat there and had those judgmental thoughts about another's addiction. After thinking about it all day I've come to the conclusion that my addicted mind that has been trying to drag me back towards slavery on a regular basis found a way to minimize my addiction by making those other addicts addiction seem so much worse than my own. That is complete bullshit, for me I am a recovering alcoholic of 33+ years and a recovering nicotine addict of 500+ days and my addictions are mine (they are MY weaknesses). Who am I to judge another.  I still can't believe I (a dumb ass that use to suck on ground up rotten stinking weeds with brown drool running out the corners of his mouth) judged my addiction less offensive than someone else's. 'bang head' 'bang head'
An addict is an addict!
I love you bro!
Amen WT57. I also must sonstantly remind myself.
Ditto ^^
(They are MY weaknesses)? NO my friend.. They are your strengths!
There is a very small group of people that could do what we're doing. Most folk have no clue as to the strength it takes to say enough is enough. To actually make it happen. You need to stop punishing yourself, you're not perfect, I'm not perfect, but at least we have the will, and determination to make a change. MOST people take the easy way out, admit defeat, and die unhappy..
One of my largest hurdles so far was excepting the fact that I'm not perfect, that I'm allowed to have faults. That addiction sucks, but life is too grand to waste one second thinking about that stupid shit. Put yourself above it, control it, accept it, and move on. I'm trying to tell you that you're much stronger than you think, and you're doing great.. Hold your head up high, you deserve it. peace
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After 500 days I went to an addiction recovery meeting last night. It was a general addiction meeting based on AA 12 step. As I sat in the meeting surrounded by a drug dealing addict, alcoholics and those with eating disorders I caught myself comparing one addiction to another. Is my addiction less offensive because its legal? Is their addiction less understandable, because they are so foolish for not recognizing how stupid their actions are? Dammit, how can I be so damn stupid! Haven't I learned anything over the past year! I am exactly like every other addict out there, a slave to an action or substance. Are some addictions easier to gain control of? Well, hell yes! My addiction is nicotine and I'd find making myself puck really easy to overcome but the addict with a eating disorder has every bit as difficult time controlling their actions as I have had. We each have our own individual weaknesses and strengths. I still can't believe how I sat there and had those judgmental thoughts about another's addiction. After thinking about it all day I've come to the conclusion that my addicted mind that has been trying to drag me back towards slavery on a regular basis found a way to minimize my addiction by making those other addicts addiction seem so much worse than my own. That is complete bullshit, for me I am a recovering alcoholic of 33+ years and a recovering nicotine addict of 500+ days and my addictions are mine (they are MY weaknesses). Who am I to judge another.  I still can't believe I (a dumb ass that use to suck on ground up rotten stinking weeds with brown drool running out the corners of his mouth) judged my addiction less offensive than someone else's. 'bang head' 'bang head'
An addict is an addict!
I love you bro!
Amen WT57. I also must sonstantly remind myself.
Ditto ^^
(They are MY weaknesses)? NO my friend.. They are your strengths!
There is a very small group of people that could do what we're doing. Most folk have no clue as to the strength it takes to say enough is enough. To actually make it happen. You need to stop punishing yourself, you're not perfect, I'm not perfect, but at least we have the will, and determination to make a change. MOST people take the easy way out, admit defeat, and die unhappy..
One of my largest hurdles so far was excepting the fact that I'm not perfect, that I'm allowed to have faults. That addiction sucks, but life is too grand to waste one second thinking about that stupid shit. Put yourself above it, control it, accept it, and move on. I'm trying to tell you that you're much stronger than you think, and you're doing great.. Hold your head up high, you deserve it. peace
Wt -
I think you have learned more in this past year than you realize. Its the realization of being an addict that led us to being able to stay clean now for as long as we have. Without it and the brotherhood here, we probably would be back in the clutches of a can. But never again.
And as for the comparison, well guess what, welcome back to a little piece of normality as we are human and tend to always compare ourselves with others. But as mentioned, yes we initially compare, but come to that knowledge that addicts are all the same, just depends on what it is we are addicted to.
A huge congrats on the 500. Hope you take the time and celebrate as that is a big accomplishment.
And will be right there beside you today and tomorrow when I wake....
-
After 500 days I went to an addiction recovery meeting last night. It was a general addiction meeting based on AA 12 step. As I sat in the meeting surrounded by a drug dealing addict, alcoholics and those with eating disorders I caught myself comparing one addiction to another. Is my addiction less offensive because its legal? Is their addiction less understandable, because they are so foolish for not recognizing how stupid their actions are? Dammit, how can I be so damn stupid! Haven't I learned anything over the past year! I am exactly like every other addict out there, a slave to an action or substance. Are some addictions easier to gain control of? Well, hell yes! My addiction is nicotine and I'd find making myself puck really easy to overcome but the addict with a eating disorder has every bit as difficult time controlling their actions as I have had. We each have our own individual weaknesses and strengths. I still can't believe how I sat there and had those judgmental thoughts about another's addiction. After thinking about it all day I've come to the conclusion that my addicted mind that has been trying to drag me back towards slavery on a regular basis found a way to minimize my addiction by making those other addicts addiction seem so much worse than my own. That is complete bullshit, for me I am a recovering alcoholic of 33+ years and a recovering nicotine addict of 500+ days and my addictions are mine (they are MY weaknesses). Who am I to judge another.  I still can't believe I (a dumb ass that use to suck on ground up rotten stinking weeds with brown drool running out the corners of his mouth) judged my addiction less offensive than someone else's. 'bang head' 'bang head'
An addict is an addict!
I love you bro!
Amen WT57. I also must sonstantly remind myself.
Ditto ^^
(They are MY weaknesses)? NO my friend.. They are your strengths!
There is a very small group of people that could do what we're doing. Most folk have no clue as to the strength it takes to say enough is enough. To actually make it happen. You need to stop punishing yourself, you're not perfect, I'm not perfect, but at least we have the will, and determination to make a change. MOST people take the easy way out, admit defeat, and die unhappy..
One of my largest hurdles so far was excepting the fact that I'm not perfect, that I'm allowed to have faults. That addiction sucks, but life is too grand to waste one second thinking about that stupid shit. Put yourself above it, control it, accept it, and move on. I'm trying to tell you that you're much stronger than you think, and you're doing great.. Hold your head up high, you deserve it. peace
Wt -
I think you have learned more in this past year than you realize. Its the realization of being an addict that led us to being able to stay clean now for as long as we have. Without it and the brotherhood here, we probably would be back in the clutches of a can. But never again.
And as for the comparison, well guess what, welcome back to a little piece of normality as we are human and tend to always compare ourselves with others. But as mentioned, yes we initially compare, but come to that knowledge that addicts are all the same, just depends on what it is we are addicted to.
A huge congrats on the 500. Hope you take the time and celebrate as that is a big accomplishment.
And will be right there beside you today and tomorrow when I wake....
Listen to these quitters WT, and quit beating yourself up for something you can not undo. Instead harness that energy and emotion into helping others learn what quitting is all about. We can't change the past, but we sure as hell and can influence today and the future.
Belated congrats on 500, you are a badass quitter!
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Today struggling with the fleeting thoughts of just one and sharing thoughts with another quitter I had a thought hit me. I hate the suck of withdrawal and craving nicotine and am glad that I went through it and remember it. That suck should be enough to keep me quit but if its not I have a stronger motivation; the suck of guilt I dealt with as a ninja dipper for all those decades. I NEVER want to repeat one minute of that! I can look my wife in the eyes everyday and know I'm not lying to her anymore. That makes any pain of quitting 100% worth it.
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Today struggling with the fleeting thoughts of just one and sharing thoughts with another quitter I had a thought hit me. I hate the suck of withdrawal and craving nicotine and am glad that I went through it and remember it. That suck should be enough to keep me quit but if its not I have a stronger motivation; the suck of guilt I dealt with as a ninja dipper for all those decades. I NEVER want to repeat one minute of that! I can look my wife in the eyes everyday and know I'm not lying to her anymore. That makes any pain of quitting 100% worth it.
The cool thing, as I understand it, is that you NEVER have to.
Thanks for your support and encouragement to get my ass back here and on the beam. Salute!
Peace.
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Today struggling with the fleeting thoughts of just one and sharing thoughts with another quitter I had a thought hit me. I hate the suck of withdrawal and craving nicotine and am glad that I went through it and remember it. That suck should be enough to keep me quit but if its not I have a stronger motivation; the suck of guilt I dealt with as a ninja dipper for all those decades. I NEVER want to repeat one minute of that! I can look my wife in the eyes everyday and know I'm not lying to her anymore. That makes any pain of quitting 100% worth it.
From one fellow ninja to another, I completely agree. No more worrying about covering your steps. No more trying to ditch the wife. No more random errands. No more lies. Just freedom from being honest. That doesn't happen unless you are quit.
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Today struggling with the fleeting thoughts of just one and sharing thoughts with another quitter I had a thought hit me. I hate the suck of withdrawal and craving nicotine and am glad that I went through it and remember it. That suck should be enough to keep me quit but if its not I have a stronger motivation; the suck of guilt I dealt with as a ninja dipper for all those decades. I NEVER want to repeat one minute of that! I can look my wife in the eyes everyday and know I'm not lying to her anymore. That makes any pain of quitting 100% worth it.
From one fellow ninja to another, I completely agree. No more worrying about covering your steps. No more trying to ditch the wife. No more random errands. No more lies. Just freedom from being honest. That doesn't happen unless you are quit.
Wt - to those of us that were ninjas, this is your best post by far. I've had a rough week on numerous levels, but the accountability I have to the others on this site and the new level if integrity I have to my wife has kept my resolution in check.
Thank you for sharing.
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Today struggling with the fleeting thoughts of just one and sharing thoughts with another quitter I had a thought hit me. I hate the suck of withdrawal and craving nicotine and am glad that I went through it and remember it. That suck should be enough to keep me quit but if its not I have a stronger motivation; the suck of guilt I dealt with as a ninja dipper for all those decades. I NEVER want to repeat one minute of that! I can look my wife in the eyes everyday and know I'm not lying to her anymore. That makes any pain of quitting 100% worth it.
From one fellow ninja to another, I completely agree. No more worrying about covering your steps. No more trying to ditch the wife. No more random errands. No more lies. Just freedom from being honest. That doesn't happen unless you are quit.
Wt - to those of us that were ninjas, this is your best post by far. I've had a rough week on numerous levels, but the accountability I have to the others on this site and the new level if integrity I have to my wife has kept my resolution in check.
Thank you for sharing.
Interesting post. I read this yesterday and decided it didn't pertain to me. I never was a ninja dipper. I was proud of my addiction and wanted the world to know 'bang head' .
After time I realized something. If I did ever slip back into slavery I would be a ninja. I would not be able to tell my wife and kids I've chose the poison over them once again. Never again for any reason. Always enjoy your posts WT...
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As an expert ninja dipper, I am amazed at the relief I've felt not having to hide some nasty addiction.
No more fake "shits" on the weekend, just so I can throw a dip in (I'm waiting for my wife to notice the miraculous improvement in my digestion). No more "taking the long way" to the grocery store to get a solid 15-20 minutes of dipping in. No more stopping at the gas station to toss my spitter before getting home. No more checking my teeth in the rear view mirror. No more closed doors at the office. No more cans hidden in my briefcase and car. No more ninja dipping for me.
From one former ninja to another, quitting with you today.
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Yeah. I used to hide tins under a garbage can at a local gas station in case, GOD FORBID my wife wanted to MOVE MY CAR out of the driveway, I couldn't have a tin in there, my wife was part bloodhound. NOT.
I used to be a real D Bag.
Thing of it is, it wasn't really ME. It was ADDICTED me. I'm DUMB for getting addicted, but done beating myself up over the shit I did while I was.
What the fuck is the use??? I exercised those Demons ONCE when I came clean to her about EVERYTHING, and that's all I need to do.
Looking back at the past as a reminder to keep straight is cool but wallowing in it is a waste of time and energy.
Someone pretty smart once said the following. It's a pretty good quote for ninjas and all addicts, I think...
"Learn from the past, look to the future, but live in the present."
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My quit group (BoQ) is like family. We grew close as we experienced similar pain, excitement and satisfaction in abandoning our nicotine use. Just like family some of us are closer than others and occasionally there are those sibling rivalries but in the end we look out for one another. If a family member withdraws and avoids the family it becomes very difficult for the others to recognize they need help and to offer help. The same is true in our quit family. If you are hit and miss at posting roll and don't reach out and become inactive it's really easy to fall by the way and get lost. Checking in, report on how your doing, checkup on others and committing to another day only takes a few minutes. By taking these few minutes each day you will insure your success and something about showing that you care about others and yourself increases your ability to cope with daily challenges.
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My quit group (BoQ) is like family. We grew close as we experienced similar pain, excitement and satisfaction in abandoning our nicotine use. Just like family some of us are closer than others and occasionally there are those sibling rivalries but in the end we look out for one another. If a family member withdraws and avoids the family it becomes very difficult for the others to recognize they need help and to offer help. The same is true in our quit family. If you are hit and miss at posting roll and don't reach out and become inactive it's really easy to fall by the way and get lost. Checking in, report on how your doing, checkup on others and committing to another day only takes a few minutes. By taking these few minutes each day you will insure your success and something about showing that you care about others and yourself increases your ability to cope with daily challenges.
I am an addict and I quit today with WT!
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My quit group (BoQ) is like family. We grew close as we experienced similar pain, excitement and satisfaction in abandoning our nicotine use. Just like family some of us are closer than others and occasionally there are those sibling rivalries but in the end we look out for one another. If a family member withdraws and avoids the family it becomes very difficult for the others to recognize they need help and to offer help. The same is true in our quit family. If you are hit and miss at posting roll and don't reach out and become inactive it's really easy to fall by the way and get lost. Checking in, report on how your doing, checkup on others and committing to another day only takes a few minutes. By taking these few minutes each day you will insure your success and something about showing that you care about others and yourself increases your ability to cope with daily challenges.
I am an addict and I quit today with WT!
Ditto. I choose freedom over addiction.
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My quit group (BoQ) is like family. We grew close as we experienced similar pain, excitement and satisfaction in abandoning our nicotine use. Just like family some of us are closer than others and occasionally there are those sibling rivalries but in the end we look out for one another. If a family member withdraws and avoids the family it becomes very difficult for the others to recognize they need help and to offer help. The same is true in our quit family. If you are hit and miss at posting roll and don't reach out and become inactive it's really easy to fall by the way and get lost. Checking in, report on how your doing, checkup on others and committing to another day only takes a few minutes. By taking these few minutes each day you will insure your success and something about showing that you care about others and yourself increases your ability to cope with daily challenges.
+1 almost a month in I'm still amazed by the brotherhood on this site the friends I've met going down the road of quit. More than a friend I've truly been treated like a brother.
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Thoughts on liberation from our addiction, (time frames vary for each of us) for me I had roughly;
8 days of hell,
42 days of darkness,
50 days of dawning,
followed by Enlightenment and Conversion leading to freedom
and I'm still seeking complete liberation. At 558 days I'm not where I want to ultimately be but I am converted and have freedom by my daily choices but I'm not yet completely liberated from my addiction. I do believe that it is obtainable, I'm not idly standing by waiting for it to happen. I'm actively working on recovering from the bad decisions I've made in the past and replacing them with more appropriate choices. Daily decisions with a goal in mind leads to obtaining what we want. My daily choices and promise are still important to reaching that total liberation. Putting 40 years behind me and living today is feeling pretty damn good. But we can never take our eye off the goal. '12'
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Thoughts on liberation from our addiction, (time frames vary for each of us) for me I had roughly;
8 days of hell,
42 days of darkness,
50 days of dawning,
followed by Enlightenment and Conversion leading to freedom
and I'm still seeking complete liberation. At 558 days I'm not where I want to ultimately be but I am converted and have freedom by my daily choices but I'm not yet completely liberated from my addiction. I do believe that it is obtainable, I'm not idly standing by waiting for it to happen. I'm actively working on recovering from the bad decisions I've made in the past and replacing them with more appropriate choices. Daily decisions with a goal in mind leads to obtaining what we want. My daily choices and promise are still important to reaching that total liberation. Putting 40 years behind me and living today is feeling pretty damn good. But we can never take our eye off the goal. '12'
Reading stuff like this helps my quit more than anything. Thanks for the motivation boss and keeping winning the fight, one day at a time. Proud to be quit with you today.
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Kill The Spider
Sir Walter Scott wrote, “what a tangled web we weave when we first practice to deceive.”
Fellow addicts I have an observation that has struck me very strong this past week.
As an addict I was a liar, I worked hard at covering my addiction, my lies, my fears of exposure and then the lies to cover my lies. Abraham Lincoln said: "No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar. "
Over 40 years ago I placed some nicotine into my system. I knew it wasn't a good thing to do but I lied to myself that it was just this one time..... And so the tangled web I began to weave!
"Worse than telling a lie is spending the rest of your life staying true to a lie." ~Robert Brault,
April 1, 2012 I came forth and confessed my life of lies. I began the process of ripping my tangled web of lies down. After living a life based on and surrounded by lies this was a dramatic change. But I knew if I didn't break free of all the lies it would be like leaving the spider alive to rebuild the web. A half truth is just another lie. I am proud to say the lie of nicotine hasn't been part of my life for 597 days.
-
Kill The Spider
Sir Walter Scott wrote, “what a tangled web we weave when we first practice to deceive.”
Fellow addicts I have an observation that has struck me very strong this past week.
As an addict I was a liar, I worked hard at covering my addiction, my lies, my fears of exposure and then the lies to cover my lies. Abraham Lincoln said: "No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar. "
Over 40 years ago I placed some nicotine into my system. I knew it wasn't a good thing to do but I lied to myself that it was just this one time..... And so the tangled web I began to weave!
"Worse than telling a lie is spending the rest of your life staying true to a lie." ~Robert Brault,
April 1, 2012 I came forth and confessed my life of lies. I began the process of ripping my tangled web of lies down. After living a life based on and surrounded by lies this was a dramatic change. But I knew if I didn't break free of all the lies it would be like leaving the spider alive to rebuild the web. A half truth is just another lie. I am proud to say the lie of nicotine hasn't been part of my life for 597 days.
I quit with YOU today! Awesome share!
-
Kill The Spider
Sir Walter Scott wrote, “what a tangled web we weave when we first practice to deceive.”
Fellow addicts I have an observation that has struck me very strong this past week.Â
As an addict I was a liar, I worked hard at covering my addiction, my lies, my fears of exposure and then the lies to cover my lies. Abraham Lincoln said: "No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar. "
Over 40 years ago I placed some nicotine into my system. I knew it wasn't a good thing to do but I lied to myself that it was just this one time..... And so the tangled web I began to weave!
"Worse than telling a lie is spending the rest of your life staying true to a lie." ~Robert Brault,
April 1, 2012 I came forth and confessed my life of lies. I began the process of ripping my tangled web of lies down. After living a life based on and surrounded by lies this was a dramatic change. But I knew if I didn't break free of all the lies it would be like leaving the spider alive to rebuild the web. A half truth is just another lie. I am proud to say the lie of nicotine hasn't been part of my life for 597 days.
I quit with YOU today! Awesome share!
bingo
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WT, thanks for this message. The craves are really bad today, and have been fighting the urge to backslide. But you reminder of that web of lies I walked away from 10 days ago sobered me up and reminded me why my quit is so important. I'm quit with you!
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Kill The Spider
Sir Walter Scott wrote, “what a tangled web we weave when we first practice to deceive.”
Fellow addicts I have an observation that has struck me very strong this past week.Â
As an addict I was a liar, I worked hard at covering my addiction, my lies, my fears of exposure and then the lies to cover my lies. Abraham Lincoln said: "No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar. "
Over 40 years ago I placed some nicotine into my system. I knew it wasn't a good thing to do but I lied to myself that it was just this one time..... And so the tangled web I began to weave!
"Worse than telling a lie is spending the rest of your life staying true to a lie." ~Robert Brault,
April 1, 2012 I came forth and confessed my life of lies. I began the process of ripping my tangled web of lies down. After living a life based on and surrounded by lies this was a dramatic change. But I knew if I didn't break free of all the lies it would be like leaving the spider alive to rebuild the web. A half truth is just another lie. I am proud to say the lie of nicotine hasn't been part of my life for 597 days.
I quit with YOU today! Awesome share!
bingo
Awesome post WT. Good stuff.
I'm done lying too. I am an addict, that is how I am wired. I don't have to let it rule or enslave me too.
Living in truth....I'm gaining more confidence in my value to my family, friends, community. I feel like I am doing good and don't have to feel like I am a hypocrite.
I love the freedom of quit!
Can't wait to show you the view on the 6th floor. Its a cool view.
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Kill The Spider
Sir Walter Scott wrote, “what a tangled web we weave when we first practice to deceive.”
Fellow addicts I have an observation that has struck me very strong this past week.Â
As an addict I was a liar, I worked hard at covering my addiction, my lies, my fears of exposure and then the lies to cover my lies. Abraham Lincoln said: "No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar. "
Over 40 years ago I placed some nicotine into my system. I knew it wasn't a good thing to do but I lied to myself that it was just this one time..... And so the tangled web I began to weave!
"Worse than telling a lie is spending the rest of your life staying true to a lie." ~Robert Brault,
April 1, 2012 I came forth and confessed my life of lies. I began the process of ripping my tangled web of lies down. After living a life based on and surrounded by lies this was a dramatic change. But I knew if I didn't break free of all the lies it would be like leaving the spider alive to rebuild the web. A half truth is just another lie. I am proud to say the lie of nicotine hasn't been part of my life for 597 days.
I quit with YOU today! Awesome share!
bingo
Awesome post WT. Good stuff.
I'm done lying too. I am an addict, that is how I am wired. I don't have to let it rule or enslave me too.
Living in truth....I'm gaining more confidence in my value to my family, friends, community. I feel like I am doing good and don't have to feel like I am a hypocrite.
I love the freedom of quit!
Can't wait to show you the view on the 6th floor. Its a cool view.
This my friends is an awesome show of what can be lifted from our lives when we come clean and quit this poison. Our lives become clearer with less lies.
Well stated WT, and will keep standing right beside you (and that's no lie).
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Kill The Spider
Sir Walter Scott wrote, “what a tangled web we weave when we first practice to deceive.”
Fellow addicts I have an observation that has struck me very strong this past week.
As an addict I was a liar, I worked hard at covering my addiction, my lies, my fears of exposure and then the lies to cover my lies. Abraham Lincoln said: "No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar. "
Over 40 years ago I placed some nicotine into my system. I knew it wasn't a good thing to do but I lied to myself that it was just this one time..... And so the tangled web I began to weave!
"Worse than telling a lie is spending the rest of your life staying true to a lie." ~Robert Brault,
April 1, 2012 I came forth and confessed my life of lies. I began the process of ripping my tangled web of lies down. After living a life based on and surrounded by lies this was a dramatic change. But I knew if I didn't break free of all the lies it would be like leaving the spider alive to rebuild the web. A half truth is just another lie. I am proud to say the lie of nicotine hasn't been part of my life for 597 days.
WT=TRUTH
-
Kill The Spider
Sir Walter Scott wrote, “what a tangled web we weave when we first practice to deceive.”
Fellow addicts I have an observation that has struck me very strong this past week.Â
As an addict I was a liar, I worked hard at covering my addiction, my lies, my fears of exposure and then the lies to cover my lies. Abraham Lincoln said: "No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar. "
Over 40 years ago I placed some nicotine into my system. I knew it wasn't a good thing to do but I lied to myself that it was just this one time..... And so the tangled web I began to weave!
"Worse than telling a lie is spending the rest of your life staying true to a lie." ~Robert Brault,
April 1, 2012 I came forth and confessed my life of lies. I began the process of ripping my tangled web of lies down. After living a life based on and surrounded by lies this was a dramatic change. But I knew if I didn't break free of all the lies it would be like leaving the spider alive to rebuild the web. A half truth is just another lie. I am proud to say the lie of nicotine hasn't been part of my life for 597 days.
WT=TRUTH
597days of complete bad ass. Thank you for all that you pay forward for newer guys like myself.
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I see so many new quitters and have been reminiscing about those days for me and how rough some of them were. The suck needs to be embraced and remembered.
You don't have to be at the mercy of your tobacco cravings. When an urge to use strikes, remember that although it may be intense, it will be short-lived, and it probably will pass within a few minutes rather you take a dip or not. Each time you resist a tobacco craving, you're one step closer to quitting for good. It can be difficult, but here are 10 ways I've taken from others and used myself to help resist the urge when craving strikes, no matter where you are. Of course these follow the 2 critical steps of POSTING ROLL and KEEPING YOUR WORD:
1. Delay-- If you feel like you're going to give in to your craving, tell yourself that you must first wait 10 more minutes and repeat as often as needed.
2. Don't have 'just one.'--You might be tempted to have just one dip to satisfy your craving. But don't fool yourself into believing that you can stop at just one. Having just one leads to another, then another.
3. Avoid triggers--Urges for tobacco are likely to be strongest in the situations where you chewed most often, such as at parties or bars, in the car or while watching television. Identify your trigger situations and have a plan in place so that you can avoid them entirely or get through them without using tobacco. Don't set yourself up for failure.
4. Get physical--Physical activity can help distract you from cravings and reduce the intensity of cravings. Physical activity can make a craving go away. If you can't do physical activity find another distraction.
5. Practice relaxation techniques-- Take the edge off stress by practicing relaxation techniques including deep-breathing exercises, muscle relaxation, yoga, visualization, hypnosis and massage.
6. Call reinforcements--Touch base with one of your group or other KTC support member, family member or friend for moral support as you struggle to resist a craving. Go to Chat, go for a walk or simply share a few laughs — or get together to commiserate about your cravings with another quitter.
7. Remember the benefits of quitting--Write down or say out loud the reasons you want to quit.
8. post encouraging thoughts for someone else who might be struggling with cravings.
9. Read others posts- Learn from how others have handled their cravings.
10. Give your mouth something to do.--Chew on sugarless gum or hard candy fake dip or munch on raw carrots, celery, nuts or sunflower seeds — something crunchy and satisfying.
Remember, trying something to beat the urge is always better than doing nothing. And each time you resist a tobacco craving, you're one step closer to being totally tobacco-free.
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4. Get physical--Physical activity can help distract you from cravings and reduce the intensity of cravings. Physical activity can make a craving go away. If you can't do physical activity find another distraction.
Wt Getting Physical (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWz9VN40nCA)
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4. Get physical--Physical activity can help distract you from cravings and reduce the intensity of cravings. Physical activity can make a craving go away. If you can't do physical activity find another distraction.
Wt Getting Physical (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWz9VN40nCA)
'oh yeah' Going to add that to my playlist
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4. Get physical--Physical activity can help distract you from cravings and reduce the intensity of cravings. Physical activity can make a craving go away. If you can't do physical activity find another distraction.
Wt Getting Physical (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWz9VN40nCA)
What is it about her eyes? They hypnotize me! The speedos were hot too.
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I just hope WT was the last guy in the video!!!
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4. Get physical--Physical activity can help distract you from cravings and reduce the intensity of cravings. Physical activity can make a craving go away. If you can't do physical activity find another distraction.
Wt Getting Physical (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWz9VN40nCA)
What is it about her eyes? They hypnotize me! The speedos were hot too.
I think I was 12 back then and still had a crush on that lady.....mmmmm
yes Let's get physical....
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I just hope WT was the last guy in the video!!!
Yep that was me. I had no idea they were filming. My hair is gray now.
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'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
WTF
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I'm compelled to make a comment about caving.
My patience and understanding of a newbie cave comes from over 40 years of not understanding that I was dealing with a serious addiction. I remember all the times I thought I'll succeed when it's time, even though I attempted quits many times.
Then it comes to those with more arrows in their quiver, I have slightly less tolerance. Not using tools that you possess is a slap in the face to those that have helped you.
And finally when a person makes a decision to cave and not return I have no room for them in my life.
From a addict with a long history (longer than many of you have lived) never let your guard down!
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I'm compelled to make a comment about caving.
My patience and understanding of a newbie cave comes from over 40 years of not understanding that I was dealing with a serious addiction. I remember all the times I thought I'll succeed when it's time, even though I attempted quits many times.
Then it comes to those with more arrows in their quiver, I have slightly less tolerance. Not using tools that you possess is a slap in the face to those that have helped you.
And finally when a person makes a decision to cave and not return I have no room for them in my life.
From a addict with a long history (longer than many of you have lived) never let your guard down!
Rock on WT! 'oh yeah'
There never is a valid reason to fail, just weak-assed addict excuses.
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I'm compelled to make a comment about caving.Â
My patience and understanding of a newbie cave comes from over 40 years of not understanding that I was dealing with a serious addiction. I remember all the times I thought I'll succeed when it's time, even though I attempted quits many times.Â
Then it comes to those with more arrows in their quiver, I have slightly less tolerance. Not using tools that you possess is a slap in the face to those that have helped you.
And finally when a person makes a decision to cave and not return I have no room for them in my life.
From a addict with a long history (longer than many of you have lived) never let your guard down!
Rock on WT! 'oh yeah'
There never is a valid reason to fail, just weak-assed addict excuses.
Keeping my guard up Today with my brother WT57!
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I can't be using it (quitting) as an excuse for EVERY THING.
This simple little statement has started a change in my thought process tonight. Quitting sucks, we are taught to embrace it and we are taught to post roll daily. These are all important steps in quitting and staying quit. I still need to use these and other tools to stay quit but at some point in time I'm QUIT and no longer Quitting.. I've been blaming everything on quitting; getting fat, being depressed, getting anxious, being obsessive about my asshole neighbors and so many other things. Even though I need accountability I'm no longer quitting I'm quit! Making this leap in thinking doesn't just happen it takes a change in thinking. While posting this I realize that thinking about quitting and being quit is still ODAAT but it means something different to me now than it did preHOF or even at 1 year. Just something to think about.
-
I can't be using it (quitting) as an excuse for EVERY THING.
This simple little statement has started a change in my thought process tonight. Quitting sucks, we are taught to embrace it and we are taught to post roll daily. These are all important steps in quitting and staying quit. I still need to use these and other tools to stay quit but at some point in time I'm QUIT and no longer Quitting.. I've been blaming everything on quitting; getting fat, being depressed, getting anxious, being obsessive about my asshole neighbors and so many other things. Even though I need accountability I'm no longer quitting I'm quit! Making this leap in thinking doesn't just happen it takes a change in thinking. While posting this I realize that thinking about quitting and being quit is still ODAAT but it means something different to me now than it did preHOF or even at 1 year. Just something to think about.
As usual awesome post, you continue to be a great example to quitters new and old as does Diesel. Thank you.
-
I can't be using it (quitting) as an excuse for EVERY THING.
This simple little statement has started a change in my thought process tonight. Quitting sucks, we are taught to embrace it and we are taught to post roll daily. These are all important steps in quitting and staying quit. I still need to use these and other tools to stay quit but at some point in time I'm QUIT and no longer Quitting.. I've been blaming everything on quitting; getting fat, being depressed, getting anxious, being obsessive about my asshole neighbors and so many other things. Even though I need accountability I'm no longer quitting I'm quit! Making this leap in thinking doesn't just happen it takes a change in thinking. While posting this I realize that thinking about quitting and being quit is still ODAAT but it means something different to me now than it did preHOF or even at 1 year. Just something to think about.
As usual awesome post, you continue to be a great example to quitters new and old as does Diesel. Thank you.
Wow this is deep and something that I will be thinking about. Thanks bad ass. This is important.
-
I can't be using it (quitting) as an excuse for EVERY THING.
This simple little statement has started a change in my thought process tonight. Quitting sucks, we are taught to embrace it and we are taught to post roll daily. These are all important steps in quitting and staying quit. I still need to use these and other tools to stay quit but at some point in time I'm QUIT and no longer Quitting.. I've been blaming everything on quitting; getting fat, being depressed, getting anxious, being obsessive about my asshole neighbors and so many other things. Even though I need accountability I'm no longer quitting I'm quit! Making this leap in thinking doesn't just happen it takes a change in thinking. While posting this I realize that thinking about quitting and being quit is still ODAAT but it means something different to me now than it did preHOF or even at 1 year. Just something to think about.
As usual awesome post, you continue to be a great example to quitters new and old as does Diesel. Thank you.
Wow this is deep and something that I will be thinking about. Thanks bad ass. This is important.
My half red neck brain is spinning WT. Thanks for sharing.
-
I can't be using it (quitting) as an excuse for EVERY THING.
This simple little statement has started a change in my thought process tonight. Quitting sucks, we are taught to embrace it and we are taught to post roll daily. These are all important steps in quitting and staying quit. I still need to use these and other tools to stay quit but at some point in time I'm QUIT and no longer Quitting.. I've been blaming everything on quitting; getting fat, being depressed, getting anxious, being obsessive about my asshole neighbors and so many other things. Even though I need accountability I'm no longer quitting I'm quit! Making this leap in thinking doesn't just happen it takes a change in thinking. While posting this I realize that thinking about quitting and being quit is still ODAAT but it means something different to me now than it did preHOF or even at 1 year. Just something to think about.
As usual awesome post, you continue to be a great example to quitters new and old as does Diesel. Thank you.
Wow this is deep and something that I will be thinking about. Thanks bad ass. This is important.
My half red neck brain is spinning WT. Thanks for sharing.
Just to piggyback on this just a bit or make the next leap so to speak. I see this in many quitters that have been around after reaching the HOF and like WT mentioned we eventually need to change our mindset. We realize that there is a point when we are"quit" that we understand to continue down this path we must keep working on becoming "better men"
Quit on fellas!
-
I can't be using it (quitting) as an excuse for EVERY THING.
This simple little statement has started a change in my thought process tonight. Quitting sucks, we are taught to embrace it and we are taught to post roll daily. These are all important steps in quitting and staying quit. I still need to use these and other tools to stay quit but at some point in time I'm QUIT and no longer Quitting.. I've been blaming everything on quitting; getting fat, being depressed, getting anxious, being obsessive about my asshole neighbors and so many other things. Even though I need accountability I'm no longer quitting I'm quit! Making this leap in thinking doesn't just happen it takes a change in thinking. While posting this I realize that thinking about quitting and being quit is still ODAAT but it means something different to me now than it did preHOF or even at 1 year. Just something to think about.
As usual awesome post, you continue to be a great example to quitters new and old as does Diesel. Thank you.
Wow this is deep and something that I will be thinking about. Thanks bad ass. This is important.
My half red neck brain is spinning WT. Thanks for sharing.
Just to piggyback on this just a bit or make the next leap so to speak. I see this in many quitters that have been around after reaching the HOF and like WT mentioned we eventually need to change our mindset. We realize that there is a point when we are"quit" that we understand to continue down this path we must keep working on becoming "better men"
Quit on fellas!
To expand on Wt. He is spot on.
Below is from the online Etymology Dictionary.
Quit comes from the Old French word QUITE = "free clear". This comes from the Latin word QUIETUS = "free"
So this word is perfect for our use on this site. When you declare I am quit, you delare, "I am free".
quit (adj.) Look up quit at Dictionary.com
early 13c., "free, clear," from O.Fr. quite "free, clear," from L. quietus "free" (in M.L. "free from war, debts, etc."), also "calm, resting" (see quiet). The verb is first attested c.1300, "to set free, redeem" (usually of a debt or suspicion); sense of "leave" is attested from late 14c.; that of "to leave (a place)" is from c.1600; that of "stop" (doing something) is from 1640s. Meaning "to give up" is from mid-15c.; quitting time is from 1835; quitter as an insult is 1881, American English. Quits "even" (with another) is from 1660s.
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I can't be using it (quitting) as an excuse for EVERY THING.
This simple little statement has started a change in my thought process tonight. Quitting sucks, we are taught to embrace it and we are taught to post roll daily. These are all important steps in quitting and staying quit. I still need to use these and other tools to stay quit but at some point in time I'm QUIT and no longer Quitting.. I've been blaming everything on quitting; getting fat, being depressed, getting anxious, being obsessive about my asshole neighbors and so many other things. Even though I need accountability I'm no longer quitting I'm quit! Making this leap in thinking doesn't just happen it takes a change in thinking. While posting this I realize that thinking about quitting and being quit is still ODAAT but it means something different to me now than it did preHOF or even at 1 year. Just something to think about.
As usual awesome post, you continue to be a great example to quitters new and old as does Diesel. Thank you.
Wow this is deep and something that I will be thinking about. Thanks bad ass. This is important.
My half red neck brain is spinning WT. Thanks for sharing.
Just to piggyback on this just a bit or make the next leap so to speak. I see this in many quitters that have been around after reaching the HOF and like WT mentioned we eventually need to change our mindset. We realize that there is a point when we are"quit" that we understand to continue down this path we must keep working on becoming "better men"
Quit on fellas!
To expand on Wt. He is spot on.
Below is from the online Etymology Dictionary.
Quit comes from the Old French word QUITE = "free clear". This comes from the Latin word QUIETUS = "free"
So this word is perfect for our use on this site. When you declare I am quit, you delare, "I am free".
quit (adj.) Look up quit at Dictionary.com
early 13c., "free, clear," from O.Fr. quite "free, clear," from L. quietus "free" (in M.L. "free from war, debts, etc."), also "calm, resting" (see quiet). The verb is first attested c.1300, "to set free, redeem" (usually of a debt or suspicion); sense of "leave" is attested from late 14c.; that of "to leave (a place)" is from c.1600; that of "stop" (doing something) is from 1640s. Meaning "to give up" is from mid-15c.; quitting time is from 1835; quitter as an insult is 1881, American English. Quits "even" (with another) is from 1660s.
Well said, WT. I've grown as a quitter, but I kind of neglected to grow as a MAN in many aspects of my life during that time, instead I chose to just blame everything on the quitting process.
I think that might have been true in the early days, but I'll be damned if I will continue to do that for the rest of my life.
Just like I had to grab my sack and man up and quit. I think it's time time to re-rack my sack and start looking at life as a "normal" person again, and not as a victim of quit.
I quit for freedom, and to be a better person. It really is hypocritical of me to continue to use my quit as a crutch to be a lazy ass and in some aspects a worse person.
-
I can't be using it (quitting) as an excuse for EVERY THING.
This simple little statement has started a change in my thought process tonight. Quitting sucks, we are taught to embrace it and we are taught to post roll daily. These are all important steps in quitting and staying quit. I still need to use these and other tools to stay quit but at some point in time I'm QUIT and no longer Quitting.. I've been blaming everything on quitting; getting fat, being depressed, getting anxious, being obsessive about my asshole neighbors and so many other things. Even though I need accountability I'm no longer quitting I'm quit! Making this leap in thinking doesn't just happen it takes a change in thinking. While posting this I realize that thinking about quitting and being quit is still ODAAT but it means something different to me now than it did preHOF or even at 1 year. Just something to think about.
As usual awesome post, you continue to be a great example to quitters new and old as does Diesel. Thank you.
Wow this is deep and something that I will be thinking about. Thanks bad ass. This is important.
My half red neck brain is spinning WT. Thanks for sharing.
Just to piggyback on this just a bit or make the next leap so to speak. I see this in many quitters that have been around after reaching the HOF and like WT mentioned we eventually need to change our mindset. We realize that there is a point when we are"quit" that we understand to continue down this path we must keep working on becoming "better men"
Quit on fellas!
To expand on Wt. He is spot on.
Below is from the online Etymology Dictionary.
Quit comes from the Old French word QUITE = "free clear". This comes from the Latin word QUIETUS = "free"
So this word is perfect for our use on this site. When you declare I am quit, you delare, "I am free".
quit (adj.) Look up quit at Dictionary.com
early 13c., "free, clear," from O.Fr. quite "free, clear," from L. quietus "free" (in M.L. "free from war, debts, etc."), also "calm, resting" (see quiet). The verb is first attested c.1300, "to set free, redeem" (usually of a debt or suspicion); sense of "leave" is attested from late 14c.; that of "to leave (a place)" is from c.1600; that of "stop" (doing something) is from 1640s. Meaning "to give up" is from mid-15c.; quitting time is from 1835; quitter as an insult is 1881, American English. Quits "even" (with another) is from 1660s.
Well said, WT. I've grown as a quitter, but I kind of neglected to grow as a MAN in many aspects of my life during that time, instead I chose to just blame everything on the quitting process.
I think that might have been true in the early days, but I'll be damned if I will continue to do that for the rest of my life.
Just like I had to grab my sack and man up and quit. I think it's time time to re-rack my sack and start looking at life as a "normal" person again, and not as a victim of quit.
I quit for freedom, and to be a better person. It really is hypocritical of me to continue to use my quit as a crutch to be a lazy ass and in some aspects a worse person.
you guys are spot on, and thanks for the reminder. Count me in on this movement to keep growing in the rest of my life. Nic undoubtedly arrested my development from an early age in a lot of areas, and now i'm eager to enjoy some growth from a new, free and clear, clean perspective. Glad some of you all are into that growth as well!
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I dug up this old post while contemplating the beginning of this new year.
Day 50 a road marker? Day 100 a milestone? 1 year another milestone?
These questions have been plaguing my mind this week. I have been comparing my quit to my life.
Life.......................Quit
Birth-------------------Day 1-------------- a beginning
1st steps--------------Day 50-------------a good start
1st day of school-----Day 100-----------a road marker
Out on your own-----1 yr-----------------a milestone
marriage kids-----
Grandkids-------------
Retirement------------
Death------------------Death(still quit)--------------Triumph
My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it. I don't know what the life expectancy of a quit addict in my demographics is, I have longevity genes so lets say 80 yrs old. That means that I am way past 1/2 way to DEAD. I have had many side trips, detours, road markers and milestones in my life. Today I consider 50 days ago (the day I quit) as one of the milestones in my life that I will cherish with some of the bigger events in my life (such as marriage, birth of daughter, birth of grandkids etc.). If I put myself at the end, at death, I don't think day 50 or day 100 will even be listed on the event calendar, Maybe I'm wrong but I don't think so.
Looking down the road into the future has been one of the more difficult aspects to deal with in my quit! When I think long term I "CAVE". I'm strong, my quit is strong, I'm gaining something I've never had "integrity", I will not cave if I continue to quit 1 day at a time.
Another scary aspect of 50 or 100 days quit is when I compare it to the past: I've been a addict for over 14,000 days I've been alive a little over 20,000 days. Compare that to 100 days-----not even a drop in the bucket. So another lesson to be learned the past can also be overwhelming, thinking of it sows seeds of "CAVE".
My conclusion is: THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS TODAY.
As my quit matures I realize how important today is! With the new year beginning I was thinking about the many decades that had come and gone with each new year beginning with a failed promise to my wife but mainly to myself to quit using Copenhagen that year. This New Years like last year my resolution was different; I instead promised to be nicotine free for one more day. That simple difference of quitting for one day, just like I did yesterday vs for the year or forever, is so simple but so profound and successful. Anyone reading this in the beginning of a quit, my single word of advise is: TODAY!
WT 642 --Jan. 2, 2014 --today
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I dug up this old post while contemplating the beginning of this new year.
Day 50 a road marker? Day 100 a milestone? 1 year another milestone?
These questions have been plaguing my mind this week. I have been comparing my quit to my life.
Life.......................Quit
Birth-------------------Day 1-------------- a beginning
1st steps--------------Day 50-------------a good start
1st day of school-----Day 100-----------a road marker
Out on your own-----1 yr-----------------a milestone
marriage kids-----
Grandkids-------------
Retirement------------
Death------------------Death(still quit)--------------Triumph
My dilemma has been that in the whole scheme of my quit, the closer I get to HOF, I am becoming underwhelmed by it. I don't know what the life expectancy of a quit addict in my demographics is, I have longevity genes so lets say 80 yrs old. That means that I am way past 1/2 way to DEAD. I have had many side trips, detours, road markers and milestones in my life. Today I consider 50 days ago (the day I quit) as one of the milestones in my life that I will cherish with some of the bigger events in my life (such as marriage, birth of daughter, birth of grandkids etc.). If I put myself at the end, at death, I don't think day 50 or day 100 will even be listed on the event calendar, Maybe I'm wrong but I don't think so.
Looking down the road into the future has been one of the more difficult aspects to deal with in my quit! When I think long term I "CAVE". I'm strong, my quit is strong, I'm gaining something I've never had "integrity", I will not cave if I continue to quit 1 day at a time.
Another scary aspect of 50 or 100 days quit is when I compare it to the past: I've been a addict for over 14,000 days I've been alive a little over 20,000 days. Compare that to 100 days-----not even a drop in the bucket. So another lesson to be learned the past can also be overwhelming, thinking of it sows seeds of "CAVE".
My conclusion is: THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS TODAY.
As my quit matures I realize how important today is! With the new year beginning I was thinking about the many decades that had come and gone with each new year beginning with a failed promise to my wife but mainly to myself to quit using Copenhagen that year. This New Years like last year my resolution was different; I instead promised to be nicotine free for one more day. That simple difference of quitting for one day, just like I did yesterday vs for the year or forever, is so simple but so profound and successful. Anyone reading this in the beginning of a quit, my single word of advise is: TODAY!
WT 642 --Jan. 2, 2014 --today
That's how you do it WT!!! Happy New year
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I can't be using it (quitting) as an excuse for EVERY THING.
This simple little statement has started a change in my thought process tonight. Quitting sucks, we are taught to embrace it and we are taught to post roll daily. These are all important steps in quitting and staying quit. I still need to use these and other tools to stay quit but at some point in time I'm QUIT and no longer Quitting.. I've been blaming everything on quitting; getting fat, being depressed, getting anxious, being obsessive about my asshole neighbors and so many other things. Even though I need accountability I'm no longer quitting I'm quit! Making this leap in thinking doesn't just happen it takes a change in thinking. While posting this I realize that thinking about quitting and being quit is still ODAAT but it means something different to me now than it did preHOF or even at 1 year. Just something to think about.
As usual awesome post, you continue to be a great example to quitters new and old as does Diesel. Thank you.
Wow this is deep and something that I will be thinking about. Thanks bad ass. This is important.
My half red neck brain is spinning WT. Thanks for sharing.
Just to piggyback on this just a bit or make the next leap so to speak. I see this in many quitters that have been around after reaching the HOF and like WT mentioned we eventually need to change our mindset. We realize that there is a point when we are"quit" that we understand to continue down this path we must keep working on becoming "better men"
Quit on fellas!
To expand on Wt. He is spot on.
Below is from the online Etymology Dictionary.
Quit comes from the Old French word QUITE = "free clear". This comes from the Latin word QUIETUS = "free"
So this word is perfect for our use on this site. When you declare I am quit, you delare, "I am free".
quit (adj.) Look up quit at Dictionary.com
early 13c., "free, clear," from O.Fr. quite "free, clear," from L. quietus "free" (in M.L. "free from war, debts, etc."), also "calm, resting" (see quiet). The verb is first attested c.1300, "to set free, redeem" (usually of a debt or suspicion); sense of "leave" is attested from late 14c.; that of "to leave (a place)" is from c.1600; that of "stop" (doing something) is from 1640s. Meaning "to give up" is from mid-15c.; quitting time is from 1835; quitter as an insult is 1881, American English. Quits "even" (with another) is from 1660s.
Well said, WT. I've grown as a quitter, but I kind of neglected to grow as a MAN in many aspects of my life during that time, instead I chose to just blame everything on the quitting process.
I think that might have been true in the early days, but I'll be damned if I will continue to do that for the rest of my life.
Just like I had to grab my sack and man up and quit. I think it's time time to re-rack my sack and start looking at life as a "normal" person again, and not as a victim of quit.
I quit for freedom, and to be a better person. It really is hypocritical of me to continue to use my quit as a crutch to be a lazy ass and in some aspects a worse person.
you guys are spot on, and thanks for the reminder. Count me in on this movement to keep growing in the rest of my life. Nic undoubtedly arrested my development from an early age in a lot of areas, and now i'm eager to enjoy some growth from a new, free and clear, clean perspective. Glad some of you all are into that growth as well!
I think this needs to be bumped back up to the top for a little while. It's one of the most original threads I've come across in a long time. Just as there is no excuse to cave, quitting isn't an excuse to neglect any other part of your life.
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I let my guard down, I decided just one was acceptable, that I had proven my strength against nicotine. The next thing I knew (almost instantly) I had a whole upper lip full of dip hiding it from my wife and everyone else. How embarrassed I was to let anyone who knew my journey. At one point I panicked, not because I was afraid of being caught but rather I misplaced my can and I panicked because I couldn't get my fix! I am glad to let you know this was my dip dream on day 646.
I haven't had a dip dream in a very long time but this one woke me from my complacency. Unlike past dreams I hated, I'm glad to have this reminder of the power of my addiction. I'm still quit and have made my promise for today so I know I'm safe today!
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I let my guard down, I decided just one was acceptable, that I had proven my strength against nicotine. The next thing I knew (almost instantly) I had a whole upper lip full of dip hiding it from my wife and everyone else. How embarrassed I was to let anyone who knew my journey. At one point I panicked, not because I was afraid of being caught but rather I misplaced my can and I panicked because I couldn't get my fix! I am glad to let you know this was my dip dream on day 646.
I haven't had a dip dream in a very long time but this one woke me from my complacency. Unlike past dreams I hated, I'm glad to have this reminder of the power of my addiction. I'm still quit and have made my promise for today so I know I'm safe today!
The bitch is trying to sneak in his bed at midnight. Finger in her eye, knee to her groin. Way to go!
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I let my guard down, I decided just one was acceptable, that I had proven my strength against nicotine. The next thing I knew (almost instantly) I had a whole upper lip full of dip hiding it from my wife and everyone else. How embarrassed I was to let anyone who knew my journey. At one point I panicked, not because I was afraid of being caught but rather I misplaced my can and I panicked because I couldn't get my fix! I am glad to let you know this was my dip dream on day 646.Â
I haven't had a dip dream in a very long time but this one woke me from my complacency. Unlike past dreams I hated, I'm glad to have this reminder of the power of my addiction. I'm still quit and have made my promise for today so I know I'm safe today!
The bitch is trying to sneak in his bed at midnight. Finger in her eye, knee to her groin. Way to go!
I hate those freaking dreams.
They usually involve me fucking up everything in my life as well (cheating on wife, stealing shit, etc).
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I let my guard down, I decided just one was acceptable, that I had proven my strength against nicotine. The next thing I knew (almost instantly) I had a whole upper lip full of dip hiding it from my wife and everyone else. How embarrassed I was to let anyone who knew my journey. At one point I panicked, not because I was afraid of being caught but rather I misplaced my can and I panicked because I couldn't get my fix! I am glad to let you know this was my dip dream on day 646.Â
I haven't had a dip dream in a very long time but this one woke me from my complacency. Unlike past dreams I hated, I'm glad to have this reminder of the power of my addiction. I'm still quit and have made my promise for today so I know I'm safe today!
The bitch is trying to sneak in his bed at midnight. Finger in her eye, knee to her groin. Way to go!
I hate those freaking dreams.
They usually involve me fucking up everything in my life as well (cheating on wife, stealing shit, etc).
Proud of YOU WT! :)
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I let my guard down, I decided just one was acceptable, that I had proven my strength against nicotine. The next thing I knew (almost instantly) I had a whole upper lip full of dip hiding it from my wife and everyone else. How embarrassed I was to let anyone who knew my journey. At one point I panicked, not because I was afraid of being caught but rather I misplaced my can and I panicked because I couldn't get my fix! I am glad to let you know this was my dip dream on day 646.Â
I haven't had a dip dream in a very long time but this one woke me from my complacency. Unlike past dreams I hated, I'm glad to have this reminder of the power of my addiction. I'm still quit and have made my promise for today so I know I'm safe today!
The bitch is trying to sneak in his bed at midnight. Finger in her eye, knee to her groin. Way to go!
I hate those freaking dreams.
They usually involve me fucking up everything in my life as well (cheating on wife, stealing shit, etc).
Proud of YOU WT! :)
Decades of dipping. 600+ is still an accomplishment but the ratio is that we are very young in our freedom.
The nic bitch is still checking on us to find a crack in our wall. Glad you're still solid. Quit every day with the Farmer in Idaho.
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I let my guard down, I decided just one was acceptable, that I had proven my strength against nicotine. The next thing I knew (almost instantly) I had a whole upper lip full of dip hiding it from my wife and everyone else. How embarrassed I was to let anyone who knew my journey. At one point I panicked, not because I was afraid of being caught but rather I misplaced my can and I panicked because I couldn't get my fix! I am glad to let you know this was my dip dream on day 646.Â
I haven't had a dip dream in a very long time but this one woke me from my complacency. Unlike past dreams I hated, I'm glad to have this reminder of the power of my addiction. I'm still quit and have made my promise for today so I know I'm safe today!
The bitch is trying to sneak in his bed at midnight. Finger in her eye, knee to her groin. Way to go!
I hate those freaking dreams.
They usually involve me fucking up everything in my life as well (cheating on wife, stealing shit, etc).
Proud of YOU WT! :)
Decades of dipping. 600+ is still an accomplishment but the ratio is that we are very young in our freedom.
The nic bitch is still checking on us to find a crack in our wall. Glad you're still solid. Quit every day with the Farmer in Idaho.
Hang tough WT. Don't let a silly dream get to you.
Although I do wake up in tears when I was just about to give Kate Upton the best 4 inches of her life, but right before penetration occurs...I wake up. I try to go back to sleep and "re-dream" it, but it never fucking works.
Fml
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I let my guard down, I decided just one was acceptable, that I had proven my strength against nicotine. The next thing I knew (almost instantly) I had a whole upper lip full of dip hiding it from my wife and everyone else. How embarrassed I was to let anyone who knew my journey. At one point I panicked, not because I was afraid of being caught but rather I misplaced my can and I panicked because I couldn't get my fix! I am glad to let you know this was my dip dream on day 646.Â
I haven't had a dip dream in a very long time but this one woke me from my complacency. Unlike past dreams I hated, I'm glad to have this reminder of the power of my addiction. I'm still quit and have made my promise for today so I know I'm safe today!
The bitch is trying to sneak in his bed at midnight. Finger in her eye, knee to her groin. Way to go!
I hate those freaking dreams.
They usually involve me fucking up everything in my life as well (cheating on wife, stealing shit, etc).
Proud of YOU WT! :)
Decades of dipping. 600+ is still an accomplishment but the ratio is that we are very young in our freedom.
The nic bitch is still checking on us to find a crack in our wall. Glad you're still solid. Quit every day with the Farmer in Idaho.
Hang tough WT. Don't let a silly dream get to you.
Although I do wake up in tears when I was just about to give Kate Upton the best 4 inches of her life, but right before penetration occurs...I wake up. I try to go back to sleep and "re-dream" it, but it never fucking works.
Fml
I was about to say something but now am shaken by the vision of Diesel's dream
'Crazy'
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Today caught me a little off guard. I posted late, I'd been busy doing some work on the house and just hadn't got online. Stopped to eat and posted day 663. After lunch I was doing some backhoe work and BAM!!! that bitch hit me with constant craving all afternoon. I went through every stupid justification in my mind for just one. At first I was very depressed that I was dealing with the bitch, but then I remembered the suck of pre HOF and was glad that in my complacency I was given this reminder. How many cavers have we seen come crawling back after they let their guard down. Posting roll, having occasional craving and even dip dreams are just a few ways to keep my addiction and vulnerability fresh in my mind so I will not only embrace the suck of quitting but I'm embracing the joy of being quit and the reminders of my past. I hate that shit and what I let it steal from me.
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Today caught me a little off guard. I posted late, I'd been busy doing some work on the house and just hadn't got online. Stopped to eat and posted day 663. After lunch I was doing some backhoe work and BAM!!! that bitch hit me with constant craving all afternoon. I went through every stupid justification in my mind for just one. At first I was very depressed that I was dealing with the bitch, but then I remembered the suck of pre HOF and was glad that in my complacency I was given this reminder. How many cavers have we seen come crawling back after they let their guard down. Posting roll, having occasional craving and even dip dreams are just a few ways to keep my addiction and vulnerability fresh in my mind so I will not only embrace the suck of quitting but I'm embracing the joy of being quit and the reminders of my past. I hate that shit and what I let it steal from me.
Enjoying being quit with You Today.
Awesome post!
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Today caught me a little off guard. I posted late, I'd been busy doing some work on the house and just hadn't got online. Stopped to eat and posted day 663. After lunch I was doing some backhoe work and BAM!!! that bitch hit me with constant craving all afternoon. I went through every stupid justification in my mind for just one. At first I was very depressed that I was dealing with the bitch, but then I remembered the suck of pre HOF and was glad that in my complacency I was given this reminder. How many cavers have we seen come crawling back after they let their guard down. Posting roll, having occasional craving and even dip dreams are just a few ways to keep my addiction and vulnerability fresh in my mind so I will not only embrace the suck of quitting but I'm embracing the joy of being quit and the reminders of my past. I hate that shit and what I let it steal from me.
Enjoying being quit with You Today.
Awesome post!
Way to keep your tools sharp WT! You won't be caving today.
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Today caught me a little off guard. I posted late, I'd been busy doing some work on the house and just hadn't got online. Stopped to eat and posted day 663. After lunch I was doing some backhoe work and BAM!!! that bitch hit me with constant craving all afternoon. I went through every stupid justification in my mind for just one. At first I was very depressed that I was dealing with the bitch, but then I remembered the suck of pre HOF and was glad that in my complacency I was given this reminder. How many cavers have we seen come crawling back after they let their guard down. Posting roll, having occasional craving and even dip dreams are just a few ways to keep my addiction and vulnerability fresh in my mind so I will not only embrace the suck of quitting but I'm embracing the joy of being quit and the reminders of my past. I hate that shit and what I let it steal from me.
Enjoying being quit with You Today.
Awesome post!
Way to keep your tools sharp WT! You won't be caving today.
Good job brother way to smack the bitch right back!
I know I keep having recurring dip dreams and really aint liking it!
I keep thinking of all the tough days I have went thru and how I'm not alone then it kicks it back but dam those dreams are so vivid!
Quit on brother and always remember I/we are all here for you!
Grizzly25/Lou
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I went through every stupid justification in my mind for just one.
This is an excellent reminder that the fight is never over. Thanks for sharing!
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Well, well, well, I got another reminder today of what my use of nicotine left me. I spent time today in the dentist chair today having yet another root canal. I have lost 10 teeth either partially or completely, gum grafts, empty holes, crowns and implants. I'm sure that I'm not done with my dental problems. It's good to have these problems as a reminder of what I gave up and it is also good to have problems that are repairable rather than suffer the loss of my face, jaw, throat or stomach.
Dip cost me so much more than the 10's of thousands of dollars for cans it has cost me 10's of thousands of dollars in dental bills. There is another cost that was even greater than all these dollars. That damn can of poison cost me the experience of sharing my daughter growing up. I can't bring that back but I can enjoy and share with her as her children grow up. These empty spaces in my gums where teeth should be are a daily reminder that I will not dip today but rather reach out and spend time with my family.
UST 'Finger'
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Well, well, well, I got another reminder today of what my use of nicotine left me. I spent time today in the dentist chair today having yet another root canal. I have lost 10 teeth either partially or completely, gum grafts, empty holes, crowns and implants. I'm sure that I'm not done with my dental problems. It's good to have these problems as a reminder of what I gave up and it is also good to have problems that are repairable rather than suffer the loss of my face, jaw, throat or stomach.
Dip cost me so much more than the 10's of thousands of dollars for cans it has cost me 10's of thousands of dollars in dental bills. There is another cost that was even greater than all these dollars. That damn can of poison cost me the experience of sharing my daughter growing up. I can't bring that back but I can enjoy and share with her as her children grow up. These empty spaces in my gums where teeth should be are a daily reminder that I will not dip today but rather reach out and spend time with my family.
UST 'Finger'
I know it's hard to forget the past, but we can forgive ourselves and give our families everything we have now. Quit always with you!
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Well, well, well, I got another reminder today of what my use of nicotine left me. I spent time today in the dentist chair today having yet another root canal. I have lost 10 teeth either partially or completely, gum grafts, empty holes, crowns and implants. I'm sure that I'm not done with my dental problems. It's good to have these problems as a reminder of what I gave up and it is also good to have problems that are repairable rather than suffer the loss of my face, jaw, throat or stomach.Â
Dip cost me so much more than the 10's of thousands of dollars for cans it has cost me 10's of thousands of dollars in dental bills. There is another cost that was even greater than all these dollars. That damn can of poison cost me the experience of sharing my daughter growing up. I can't bring that back but I can enjoy and share with her as her children grow up. These empty spaces in my gums where teeth should be are a daily reminder that I will not dip today but rather reach out and spend time with my family.
UST 'Finger'
I know it's hard to forget the past, but we can forgive ourselves and give our families everything we have now. Quit always with you!
'Finger' UST indeed. A big F.U. to the Douche Bags in the local, state, and national US govt. during my lifetime (If I could figure out that nicotine is a zero positive/ infinitely negative addiction than so should our government, but it is still legal due to the revenue it brings in from the taxes levied against the nicotine junkies). Thanks for all you do here Wt57, You helped get me on the KTC path early in my quit, and have helped so many people here!
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Well, well, well, I got another reminder today of what my use of nicotine left me. I spent time today in the dentist chair today having yet another root canal. I have lost 10 teeth either partially or completely, gum grafts, empty holes, crowns and implants. I'm sure that I'm not done with my dental problems. It's good to have these problems as a reminder of what I gave up and it is also good to have problems that are repairable rather than suffer the loss of my face, jaw, throat or stomach.Â
Dip cost me so much more than the 10's of thousands of dollars for cans it has cost me 10's of thousands of dollars in dental bills. There is another cost that was even greater than all these dollars. That damn can of poison cost me the experience of sharing my daughter growing up. I can't bring that back but I can enjoy and share with her as her children grow up. These empty spaces in my gums where teeth should be are a daily reminder that I will not dip today but rather reach out and spend time with my family.
UST 'Finger'
I know it's hard to forget the past, but we can forgive ourselves and give our families everything we have now. Quit always with you!
'Finger' UST indeed. A big F.U. to the Douche Bags in the local, state, and national US govt. during my lifetime (If I could figure out that nicotine is a zero positive/ infinitely negative addiction than so should our government, but it is still legal due to the revenue it brings in from the taxes levied against the nicotine junkies). Thanks for all you do here Wt57, You helped get me on the KTC path early in my quit, and have helped so many people here!
What Matt says X 2
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Well, well, well, I got another reminder today of what my use of nicotine left me. I spent time today in the dentist chair today having yet another root canal. I have lost 10 teeth either partially or completely, gum grafts, empty holes, crowns and implants. I'm sure that I'm not done with my dental problems. It's good to have these problems as a reminder of what I gave up and it is also good to have problems that are repairable rather than suffer the loss of my face, jaw, throat or stomach.Â
Dip cost me so much more than the 10's of thousands of dollars for cans it has cost me 10's of thousands of dollars in dental bills. There is another cost that was even greater than all these dollars. That damn can of poison cost me the experience of sharing my daughter growing up. I can't bring that back but I can enjoy and share with her as her children grow up. These empty spaces in my gums where teeth should be are a daily reminder that I will not dip today but rather reach out and spend time with my family.
UST 'Finger'
I know it's hard to forget the past, but we can forgive ourselves and give our families everything we have now. Quit always with you!
'Finger' UST indeed. A big F.U. to the Douche Bags in the local, state, and national US govt. during my lifetime (If I could figure out that nicotine is a zero positive/ infinitely negative addiction than so should our government, but it is still legal due to the revenue it brings in from the taxes levied against the nicotine junkies). Thanks for all you do here Wt57, You helped get me on the KTC path early in my quit, and have helped so many people here!
What Matt says X 2
My hat is always in your ring.
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Yet another reminder of my past on day 702. I had another dip dream. I know I'd never do the things I did in this dream, but it was in my head. It was a good reminder of what a liar I was and how much control nicotine had on my life. I will say that one overwhelming thought I had in the dream was that as I posted on KTC while I was caved, I'd be banned. I was deeply depressed that I had fallen back into my lying. The lying was even more painful than the cave.
I'm so proud to admit that I am a recovering addict and a recovering liar! When I quit and flushed my stash I honestly thought that in 6 months or so that I would be total free and recovered. Even at one year I didn't realize the scope of recovery. 15-16,000 days of using aren't put into my past by a some 700 days of abstinence. I am in recovery and accept the fact that sometimes life sucks but I can deal with it, without resorting to nicotine. Instead:
"Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;"
Today is another day, I'm quit, I will strive to enjoy it and will share my experience with others.
-
Yet another reminder of my past on day 702. I had another dip dream. I know I'd never do the things I did in this dream, but it was in my head. It was a good reminder of what a liar I was and how much control nicotine had on my life. I will say that one overwhelming thought I had in the dream was that as I posted on KTC while I was caved, I'd be banned. I was deeply depressed that I had fallen back into my lying. The lying was even more painful than the cave.
I'm so proud to admit that I am a recovering addict and a recovering liar! When I quit and flushed my stash I honestly thought that in 6 months or so that I would be total free and recovered. Even at one year I didn't realize the scope of recovery. 15-16,000 days of using aren't put into my past by a some 700 days of abstinence. I am in recovery and accept the fact that sometimes life sucks but I can deal with it, without resorting to nicotine. Instead:
"Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;"
Today is another day, I'm quit, I will strive to enjoy it and will share my experience with others.
I too am a recovering nic addict and liar.
I quit with You today!
-
Yet another reminder of my past on day 702. I had another dip dream. I know I'd never do the things I did in this dream, but it was in my head. It was a good reminder of what a liar I was and how much control nicotine had on my life. I will say that one overwhelming thought I had in the dream was that as I posted on KTC while I was caved, I'd be banned. I was deeply depressed that I had fallen back into my lying. The lying was even more painful than the cave.Â
I'm so proud to admit that I am a recovering addict and a recovering liar! When I quit and flushed my stash I honestly thought that in 6 months or so that I would be total free and recovered. Even at one year I didn't realize the scope of recovery. 15-16,000 days of using aren't put into my past by a some 700 days of abstinence. I am in recovery and accept the fact that sometimes life sucks but I can deal with it, without resorting to nicotine. Instead:
"Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;"
Today is another day, I'm quit, I will strive to enjoy it and will share my experience with others.
I too am a recovering nic addict and liar.
I quit with You today!
It really does help to see posts that understand and share about the longer term recovery process. That is the end game I am in for, and I appreciate the heck out of you guys sticking around and being open about it for the rest of us.
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Yet another reminder of my past on day 702. I had another dip dream. I know I'd never do the things I did in this dream, but it was in my head. It was a good reminder of what a liar I was and how much control nicotine had on my life. I will say that one overwhelming thought I had in the dream was that as I posted on KTC while I was caved, I'd be banned. I was deeply depressed that I had fallen back into my lying. The lying was even more painful than the cave.Â
I'm so proud to admit that I am a recovering addict and a recovering liar! When I quit and flushed my stash I honestly thought that in 6 months or so that I would be total free and recovered. Even at one year I didn't realize the scope of recovery. 15-16,000 days of using aren't put into my past by a some 700 days of abstinence. I am in recovery and accept the fact that sometimes life sucks but I can deal with it, without resorting to nicotine. Instead:
"Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;"
Today is another day, I'm quit, I will strive to enjoy it and will share my experience with others.
I too am a recovering nic addict and liar.
I quit with You today!
It really does help to see posts that understand and share about the longer term recovery process. That is the end game I am in for, and I appreciate the heck out of you guys sticking around and being open about it for the rest of us.
And that is why WT is a kick ass quitter! Enjoy the quit and freedom every day.
-
Yet another reminder of my past on day 702. I had another dip dream. I know I'd never do the things I did in this dream, but it was in my head. It was a good reminder of what a liar I was and how much control nicotine had on my life. I will say that one overwhelming thought I had in the dream was that as I posted on KTC while I was caved, I'd be banned. I was deeply depressed that I had fallen back into my lying. The lying was even more painful than the cave.Â
I'm so proud to admit that I am a recovering addict and a recovering liar! When I quit and flushed my stash I honestly thought that in 6 months or so that I would be total free and recovered. Even at one year I didn't realize the scope of recovery. 15-16,000 days of using aren't put into my past by a some 700 days of abstinence. I am in recovery and accept the fact that sometimes life sucks but I can deal with it, without resorting to nicotine. Instead:
"Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;"
Today is another day, I'm quit, I will strive to enjoy it and will share my experience with others.
I too am a recovering nic addict and liar.
I quit with You today!
It really does help to see posts that understand and share about the longer term recovery process. That is the end game I am in for, and I appreciate the heck out of you guys sticking around and being open about it for the rest of us.
And that is why WT is a kick ass quitter! Enjoy the quit and freedom every day.
great words. it is a privilege to read these thoughts.
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Yet another reminder of my past on day 702. I had another dip dream. I know I'd never do the things I did in this dream, but it was in my head. It was a good reminder of what a liar I was and how much control nicotine had on my life. I will say that one overwhelming thought I had in the dream was that as I posted on KTC while I was caved, I'd be banned. I was deeply depressed that I had fallen back into my lying. The lying was even more painful than the cave.Â
I'm so proud to admit that I am a recovering addict and a recovering liar! When I quit and flushed my stash I honestly thought that in 6 months or so that I would be total free and recovered. Even at one year I didn't realize the scope of recovery. 15-16,000 days of using aren't put into my past by a some 700 days of abstinence. I am in recovery and accept the fact that sometimes life sucks but I can deal with it, without resorting to nicotine. Instead:
"Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;"
Today is another day, I'm quit, I will strive to enjoy it and will share my experience with others.
I too am a recovering nic addict and liar.
I quit with You today!
It really does help to see posts that understand and share about the longer term recovery process. That is the end game I am in for, and I appreciate the heck out of you guys sticking around and being open about it for the rest of us.
And that is why WT is a kick ass quitter! Enjoy the quit and freedom every day.
great words. it is a privilege to read these thoughts.
Congratulations WT !!!You Sir, are one bad ass quitter !!! I would be proud to be on your quit team any day.....
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Yet another reminder of my past on day 702. I had another dip dream. I know I'd never do the things I did in this dream, but it was in my head. It was a good reminder of what a liar I was and how much control nicotine had on my life. I will say that one overwhelming thought I had in the dream was that as I posted on KTC while I was caved, I'd be banned. I was deeply depressed that I had fallen back into my lying. The lying was even more painful than the cave.Â
I'm so proud to admit that I am a recovering addict and a recovering liar! When I quit and flushed my stash I honestly thought that in 6 months or so that I would be total free and recovered. Even at one year I didn't realize the scope of recovery. 15-16,000 days of using aren't put into my past by a some 700 days of abstinence. I am in recovery and accept the fact that sometimes life sucks but I can deal with it, without resorting to nicotine. Instead:
"Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;"
Today is another day, I'm quit, I will strive to enjoy it and will share my experience with others.
I too am a recovering nic addict and liar.
I quit with You today!
It really does help to see posts that understand and share about the longer term recovery process. That is the end game I am in for, and I appreciate the heck out of you guys sticking around and being open about it for the rest of us.
And that is why WT is a kick ass quitter! Enjoy the quit and freedom every day.
great words. it is a privilege to read these thoughts.
Congratulations WT !!!You Sir, are one bad ass quitter !!! I would be proud to be on your quit team any day.....
"You been quit Long?"..(No, I haven't)
But WT has!
Nice work WT and I too have no problem with knowing that I need to do this ODAAT. It seems to work.
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Yet another reminder of my past on day 702. I had another dip dream. I know I'd never do the things I did in this dream, but it was in my head. It was a good reminder of what a liar I was and how much control nicotine had on my life. I will say that one overwhelming thought I had in the dream was that as I posted on KTC while I was caved, I'd be banned. I was deeply depressed that I had fallen back into my lying. The lying was even more painful than the cave.Â
I'm so proud to admit that I am a recovering addict and a recovering liar! When I quit and flushed my stash I honestly thought that in 6 months or so that I would be total free and recovered. Even at one year I didn't realize the scope of recovery. 15-16,000 days of using aren't put into my past by a some 700 days of abstinence. I am in recovery and accept the fact that sometimes life sucks but I can deal with it, without resorting to nicotine. Instead:
"Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;"
Today is another day, I'm quit, I will strive to enjoy it and will share my experience with others.
I too am a recovering nic addict and liar.
I quit with You today!
It really does help to see posts that understand and share about the longer term recovery process. That is the end game I am in for, and I appreciate the heck out of you guys sticking around and being open about it for the rest of us.
And that is why WT is a kick ass quitter! Enjoy the quit and freedom every day.
great words. it is a privilege to read these thoughts.
Congratulations WT !!!You Sir, are one bad ass quitter !!! I would be proud to be on your quit team any day.....
"You been quit Long?"..(No, I haven't)
But WT has!
Nice work WT and I too have no problem with knowing that I need to do this ODAAT. It seems to work.
WT: I haven't had a dip dream since forever then out of nowhere, I have one last night.
Didn't mess me up in the head. Just part of recovery and a sign that we are winning the battle.
Quit with you and congrats on 700 milestone.
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Yet another reminder of my past on day 702. I had another dip dream. I know I'd never do the things I did in this dream, but it was in my head. It was a good reminder of what a liar I was and how much control nicotine had on my life. I will say that one overwhelming thought I had in the dream was that as I posted on KTC while I was caved, I'd be banned. I was deeply depressed that I had fallen back into my lying. The lying was even more painful than the cave.Â
I'm so proud to admit that I am a recovering addict and a recovering liar! When I quit and flushed my stash I honestly thought that in 6 months or so that I would be total free and recovered. Even at one year I didn't realize the scope of recovery. 15-16,000 days of using aren't put into my past by a some 700 days of abstinence. I am in recovery and accept the fact that sometimes life sucks but I can deal with it, without resorting to nicotine. Instead:
"Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;"
Today is another day, I'm quit, I will strive to enjoy it and will share my experience with others.
I too am a recovering nic addict and liar.
I quit with You today!
It really does help to see posts that understand and share about the longer term recovery process. That is the end game I am in for, and I appreciate the heck out of you guys sticking around and being open about it for the rest of us.
And that is why WT is a kick ass quitter! Enjoy the quit and freedom every day.
great words. it is a privilege to read these thoughts.
Congratulations WT !!!You Sir, are one bad ass quitter !!! I would be proud to be on your quit team any day.....
"You been quit Long?"..(No, I haven't)
But WT has!
Nice work WT and I too have no problem with knowing that I need to do this ODAAT. It seems to work.
WT: I haven't had a dip dream since forever then out of nowhere, I have one last night.
Didn't mess me up in the head. Just part of recovery and a sign that we are winning the battle.
Quit with you and congrats on 700 milestone.
One of the things that drives me each day is the realization that a cave takes more integrity from me. I was a liar and each day I/we regain our integrity! That drives me. Thanks for the post.
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
Love seeing my bro's hitting these milestones. Congrats
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
Love seeing my bro's hitting these milestones. Congrats
'Cheers' Nice job WT!
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
Love seeing my bro's hitting these milestones. Congrats
'Cheers' Nice job WT!
Congrats on 2 years of freedom WT!
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
Love seeing my bro's hitting these milestones. Congrats
'Cheers' Nice job WT!
Congrats on 2 years of freedom WT!
Congrats, awesome job!
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
Love seeing my bro's hitting these milestones. Congrats
'Cheers' Nice job WT!
Congrats on 2 years of freedom WT!
Congrats, awesome job!
Grats bro. You have been along side me since day 1. Proud to still be quit with you today.
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
Love seeing my bro's hitting these milestones. Congrats
'Cheers' Nice job WT!
Congrats on 2 years of freedom WT!
Congrats, awesome job!
Grats bro. You have been along side me since day 1. Proud to still be quit with you today.
2 years quit!!!!!! What a great 2 years as well. Looking back, I curious about the night you dumped your stash in the toilet and the emotion you had.
I knew you would quit every damn day. You are true to your word and suit up to play every dang day!
I can't say that I had the humility like you did and you taught me that you don't get better and leave KTC. You stay better by posting daily.
I hope you have some really nasty celebration planned. I'm not talking about plowing your fields either.
Happy Birthday to your quit!
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
Love seeing my bro's hitting these milestones. Congrats
'Cheers' Nice job WT!
Congrats on 2 years of freedom WT!
Congrats, awesome job!
Grats bro. You have been along side me since day 1. Proud to still be quit with you today.
2 years quit!!!!!! What a great 2 years as well. Looking back, I curious about the night you dumped your stash in the toilet and the emotion you had.
I knew you would quit every damn day. You are true to your word and suit up to play every dang day!
I can't say that I had the humility like you did and you taught me that you don't get better and leave KTC. You stay better by posting daily.
I hope you have some really nasty celebration planned. I'm not talking about plowing your fields either.
Happy Birthday to your quit!
Thanks wt for sticking around.
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
Love seeing my bro's hitting these milestones. Congrats
'Cheers' Nice job WT!
Congrats on 2 years of freedom WT!
Congrats, awesome job!
Grats bro. You have been along side me since day 1. Proud to still be quit with you today.
2 years quit!!!!!! What a great 2 years as well. Looking back, I curious about the night you dumped your stash in the toilet and the emotion you had.
I knew you would quit every damn day. You are true to your word and suit up to play every dang day!
I can't say that I had the humility like you did and you taught me that you don't get better and leave KTC. You stay better by posting daily.
I hope you have some really nasty celebration planned. I'm not talking about plowing your fields either.
Happy Birthday to your quit!
Thanks wt for sticking around.
Indeed. Congrats are in order.
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My friends, I'm overwhelmed tonight as I read all your comments. I was in that tractor most of the day Mark and didn't log on much after posting roll this morning, so I missed that all of you had been posting in my intro. As I write this I'm just a couple hours away from my actual quit time, April 1, 2012 1:18 am. I've thought a lot about why my emotions were what they were. I honestly believe the 3 days between joining KTC and quitting was my time of awakening. I knew as I sat by the toilet and dumped my last 3 cans, this time was different. I believe I knew deep down I was beginning my true recovery. Initially I thought 100 days of posting would have me cured.
After reaching HOF I recognized I had a long way to go but couldn't see myself posting roll for 1 year. As time passed I saw far to many post HOF caves. I posted 100% for that first year and then as I started my 2nd year I thought I should test myself and stopped posting for a short period of time but realized that my subconscious addicted mind still Fantasized about slipping back into my daily routine. Taking a few minutes each morning is a very small price to pay for my freedom. Each of us pick and choose our level of participation online. Some post support in all groups others hang in chat offering support there. We all decide what works for us. For me, I try to check the intros for new quitters and welcome them. Often I lend my support till they get established and start finding their support in their group. I don't consider anything about my quit special or different, it's just what gives me encouragement and opportunity to pay forward the support I received.
Tonight as I reminisce the past 2 years I realize I've grown more and learned more about WT than the previous 55 years of life. I now know that everyday I must do a self evaluation and watch for my character weaknesses and work on correcting them right away.
9 months ago I joined a 12 step addiction recovery program that supplements my KTC experience. As I begin year 3, I don't anticipate much of a change. I'm beginning my 3rd time through my 12 step program, I'll still be posting roll with the July 2012 Brothers of Quit (BOQ) and the 2012 quitters. I'm also still not drinking pop.
One of the great things about my quit is the date, my quit wasn't a April fools joke and it never will be a joke as long as I make today my priority.
Today, April Fools Day, we joke and pull pranks but we don't mess around with our quit. We post roll, make a promise and keep our word!
Thanks again everyone! You have saved my life.
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
Love seeing my bro's hitting these milestones. Congrats
'Cheers' Nice job WT!
Congrats on 2 years of freedom WT!
Congrats, awesome job!
Grats bro. You have been along side me since day 1. Proud to still be quit with you today.
2 years quit!!!!!! What a great 2 years as well. Looking back, I curious about the night you dumped your stash in the toilet and the emotion you had.
I knew you would quit every damn day. You are true to your word and suit up to play every dang day!
I can't say that I had the humility like you did and you taught me that you don't get better and leave KTC. You stay better by posting daily.
I hope you have some really nasty celebration planned. I'm not talking about plowing your fields either.
Happy Birthday to your quit!
Thanks wt for sticking around.
Indeed. Congrats are in order.
way to go superstar!
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Two years today good buddy. Big time congrats. I couldn't have picked a better month to quit in to be in your group good sir.
Congrats on two years WT. You're old ass is an inspiration to us ALL. Well done sir!!!!
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
2 years! Outstanding quit going on here. Keep it up!
Grats bro!
Nice two years! Keep it up.
Congrats WT! Thank you for your inspiration here! Peace!
Love seeing my bro's hitting these milestones. Congrats
'Cheers' Nice job WT!
Congrats on 2 years of freedom WT!
Congrats, awesome job!
Grats bro. You have been along side me since day 1. Proud to still be quit with you today.
2 years quit!!!!!! What a great 2 years as well. Looking back, I curious about the night you dumped your stash in the toilet and the emotion you had.
I knew you would quit every damn day. You are true to your word and suit up to play every dang day!
I can't say that I had the humility like you did and you taught me that you don't get better and leave KTC. You stay better by posting daily.
I hope you have some really nasty celebration planned. I'm not talking about plowing your fields either.
Happy Birthday to your quit!
Thanks wt for sticking around.
Indeed. Congrats are in order.
way to go superstar!
Hearty hand shake on a job well done. God Bless
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Here I am on my first day of year 3 and again I have yet another reason to hate nicotine, big tobacco and the bull shit dip that enslaved me. I've been having pain in my mouth the past few weeks and today I finally had a abscess of a bottom molar. I only have 2 molars left on the bottom and now both of them have had root canals. Now all my top molars which have crowns are worthless because there isn't anything below them to chew against. All of my tooth loss is directly related to that damn poison in a can. For 40 years I rationalized my mouth problems to other things but today I recognize 90% of my mouth and dental problems are dip related. The other 10% are because I never brushed my teeth, my mouth was always full of chew. 2 years ago I was amazed at the dollars I'd spent on Copenhagen but today I'm amazed at how it's still costing me. Since quitting I've had 2 tooth extractions, a bridge, a implant, 4 crowns and 3 root canals. I am embarrassed that I allowed myself to lie about my addiction for so long. All that being said I am so damn proud of my new daily commitment and life. I'm also so very proud of my new friends that are on the same journey and share in this life saving forum.
That warning of tooth loss on the can may take time but it is very real, I'm proof!
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Here I am on my first day of year 3 and again I have yet another reason to hate nicotine, big tobacco and the bull shit dip that enslaved me. I've been having pain in my mouth the past few weeks and today I finally had a abscess of a bottom molar. I only have 2 molars left on the bottom and now both of them have had root canals. Now all my top molars which have crowns are worthless because there isn't anything below them to chew against. All of my tooth loss is directly related to that damn poison in a can. For 40 years I rationalized my mouth problems to other things but today I recognize 90% of my mouth and dental problems are dip related. The other 10% are because I never brushed my teeth, my mouth was always full of chew. 2 years ago I was amazed at the dollars I'd spent on Copenhagen but today I'm amazed at how it's still costing me. Since quitting I've had 2 tooth extractions, a bridge, a implant, 4 crowns and 3 root canals. I am embarrassed that I allowed myself to lie about my addiction for so long. All that being said I am so damn proud of my new daily commitment and life. I'm also so very proud of my new friends that are on the same journey and share in this life saving forum.
That warning of tooth loss on the can may take time but it is very real, I'm proof!
sorry to hear about your grill WT...but it was another good story and another eye opener
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Hey man, over 2 years of solid quit and you are still hanging around helping new guys. I like that you are not afraid to tell these guys how long you used for, because one thing I hear from a lot of dippers is, "Oh Im not gonna be able to quit, I used for (so-so) years!!!" All I tell them is, "Dude, we have guys that dipped for 40+years that are proudly quit today, and have been for some time". So I appreciate what you do man, you are a model quitter. Keep it up and Thanks again!!
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After 500 days I went to an addiction recovery meeting last night. It was a general addiction meeting based on AA 12 step. As I sat in the meeting surrounded by a drug dealing addict, alcoholics and those with eating disorders I caught myself comparing one addiction to another. Is my addiction less offensive because its legal? Is their addiction less understandable, because they are so foolish for not recognizing how stupid their actions are? Dammit, how can I be so damn stupid! Haven't I learned anything over the past year! I am exactly like every other addict out there, a slave to an action or substance. Are some addictions easier to gain control of? Well, hell yes! My addiction is nicotine and I'd find making myself puck really easy to overcome but the addict with a eating disorder has every bit as difficult time controlling their actions as I have had. We each have our own individual weaknesses and strengths. I still can't believe how I sat there and had those judgmental thoughts about another's addiction. After thinking about it all day I've come to the conclusion that my addicted mind that has been trying to drag me back towards slavery on a regular basis found a way to minimize my addiction by making those other addicts addiction seem so much worse than my own. That is complete bullshit, for me I am a recovering alcoholic of 33+ years and a recovering nicotine addict of 500+ days and my addictions are mine (they are MY weaknesses). Who am I to judge another. I still can't believe I (a dumb ass that use to suck on ground up rotten stinking weeds with brown drool running out the corners of his mouth) judged my addiction less offensive than someone else's. 'bang head' 'bang head'
An addict is an addict!
I didn't know your story, but I read through the thread. You have LOTS of gems, but this one really woke me up. I deal with addicts regularly, but looked at them with some twisted moral superiority BS... until I found ktc and quit. But for the grace of God, I would have picked up a habit that killed me in months or years instead of decades - I'm no better than any other addict because I am an addict.
Thank you for staying involved - reading your story killed any remaining justification to cave still hiding in the back of my head. Stay quit
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After 500 days I went to an addiction recovery meeting last night. It was a general addiction meeting based on AA 12 step. As I sat in the meeting surrounded by a drug dealing addict, alcoholics and those with eating disorders I caught myself comparing one addiction to another. Is my addiction less offensive because its legal? Is their addiction less understandable, because they are so foolish for not recognizing how stupid their actions are? Dammit, how can I be so damn stupid! Haven't I learned anything over the past year! I am exactly like every other addict out there, a slave to an action or substance. Are some addictions easier to gain control of? Well, hell yes! My addiction is nicotine and I'd find making myself puck really easy to overcome but the addict with a eating disorder has every bit as difficult time controlling their actions as I have had. We each have our own individual weaknesses and strengths. I still can't believe how I sat there and had those judgmental thoughts about another's addiction. After thinking about it all day I've come to the conclusion that my addicted mind that has been trying to drag me back towards slavery on a regular basis found a way to minimize my addiction by making those other addicts addiction seem so much worse than my own. That is complete bullshit, for me I am a recovering alcoholic of 33+ years and a recovering nicotine addict of 500+ days and my addictions are mine (they are MY weaknesses). Who am I to judge another. I still can't believe I (a dumb ass that use to suck on ground up rotten stinking weeds with brown drool running out the corners of his mouth) judged my addiction less offensive than someone else's. 'bang head' 'bang head'
An addict is an addict!
I didn't know your story, but I read through the thread. You have LOTS of gems, but this one really woke me up. I deal with addicts regularly, but looked at them with some twisted moral superiority BS... until I found ktc and quit. But for the grace of God, I would have picked up a habit that killed me in months or years instead of decades - I'm no better than any other addict because I am an addict.
Thank you for staying involved - reading your story killed any remaining justification to cave still hiding in the back of my head. Stay quit
ok, quote level = novice. The original quote is, of course, Wt57, I believe from '12
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WT good for you man. 34 days in, I can't imagine what 2 years is going to be like. You give me hope and excitement for a better future though sir. congratulations!
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Congrats on 2 yrs WT. I am glad you are here. Keep it up.
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Day 774
It's been quite some time since I recorded my quit activity, so here is a quick update. I've been cruising along not even thinking about dip most days, finding myself slacking off at posting roll. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have a good stock of tools in my box to fight the temptations. Today I woke up after a wild dip dream and posted roll. The dream brought me back into reality that I'm always vulnerable. I also had another reminder yesterday, I had one of my last 2 molars on the bottom pulled. Every time I eat I'm reminded of what dip did to me. It's pretty damn hard to eat without teeth.
Every time I see someone join KTC and introduce theirselves and then fail to post roll I think of my 40+ years of not truly understanding what I was dealing with. Nicotine addiction is very powerful, however it's not more powerful than a motivated addict that wants to quit and has the tools (and uses them). I always wanted to quit but not as bad as I wanted to satisfy my craving. The realization that I was completely out of control and that I could never quit on my own lead me to beginning the climb from rock bottom.
Living nicotine free is awesome but that is just the beginning; learning to live that life doesn't happen automatically. Most of us never lived any part of our adult lives without nicotine. For me I feel that even after 2 years of being nicotine free I'm just beginning to understand and adjust to my new life.
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Day 774
It's been quite some time since I recorded my quit activity, so here is a quick update. I've been cruising along not even thinking about dip most days, finding myself slacking off at posting roll. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have a good stock of tools in my box to fight the temptations. Today I woke up after a wild dip dream and posted roll. The dream brought me back into reality that I'm always vulnerable. I also had another reminder yesterday, I had my last molar on the bottom pulled. Every time I eat I'm reminded of what dip did to me. It's pretty damn hard to eat without teeth.
Every time I see someone join KTC and introduce theirselves and then fail to post roll I think of my 40+ years of not truly understanding what I was dealing with. Nicotine addiction is very powerful, however it's not more powerful than a motivated addict that wants to quit and has the tools (and uses them). I always wanted to quit but not as bad as I wanted to satisfy my craving. The realization that I was completely out of control and that I could never quit on my own lead me to beginning the climb from rock bottom.
Living nicotine free is awesome but that is just the beginning; learning to live that life doesn't happen automatically. Most of us never lived any part of our adult lives without nicotine. For me I feel that even after 2 years of being nicotine free I'm just beginning to understand and adjust to my new life.
2years quit and 5500 posts. That's why this works. Involvement. The mind is a wonderful thing but it also is our biggest enemy. I have read quite a bit of your posts in here and can say that you also inspire me to stay quit. Keep on quitting.
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I quit with you today Wt57, you are an inspiration to us all.
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I quit with you today Wt57, you are an inspiration to us all.
^^^ X2
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Day 774
It's been quite some time since I recorded my quit activity, so here is a quick update. I've been cruising along not even thinking about dip most days, finding myself slacking off at posting roll. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have a good stock of tools in my box to fight the temptations. Today I woke up after a wild dip dream and posted roll. The dream brought me back into reality that I'm always vulnerable. I also had another reminder yesterday, I had one of my last 2 molars on the bottom pulled. Every time I eat I'm reminded of what dip did to me. It's pretty damn hard to eat without teeth.
Every time I see someone join KTC and introduce theirselves and then fail to post roll I think of my 40+ years of not truly understanding what I was dealing with. Nicotine addiction is very powerful, however it's not more powerful than a motivated addict that wants to quit and has the tools (and uses them). I always wanted to quit but not as bad as I wanted to satisfy my craving. The realization that I was completely out of control and that I could never quit on my own lead me to beginning the climb from rock bottom.
Living nicotine free is awesome but that is just the beginning; learning to live that life doesn't happen automatically. Most of us never lived any part of our adult lives without nicotine. For me I feel that even after 2 years of being nicotine free I'm just beginning to understand and adjust to my new life.
Great post, as usual.
I can relate as I sneak up on two years. I find myself slacking on the role posting, but am also hardly thinking about dip, and I Fucking love it!!!
I feel guilty at times that I'm not posting roll every day, nor am I trying to help as many new quitters as I once did. However, it feels pretty damn good to finally be rolling through life without carrying such a heavy ass sandbag on my shoulders.
Quit on...
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Day 774
It's been quite some time since I recorded my quit activity, so here is a quick update. I've been cruising along not even thinking about dip most days, finding myself slacking off at posting roll. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have a good stock of tools in my box to fight the temptations. Today I woke up after a wild dip dream and posted roll. The dream brought me back into reality that I'm always vulnerable. I also had another reminder yesterday, I had one of my last 2 molars on the bottom pulled. Every time I eat I'm reminded of what dip did to me. It's pretty damn hard to eat without teeth.
Every time I see someone join KTC and introduce theirselves and then fail to post roll I think of my 40+ years of not truly understanding what I was dealing with. Nicotine addiction is very powerful, however it's not more powerful than a motivated addict that wants to quit and has the tools (and uses them). I always wanted to quit but not as bad as I wanted to satisfy my craving. The realization that I was completely out of control and that I could never quit on my own lead me to beginning the climb from rock bottom.
Living nicotine free is awesome but that is just the beginning; learning to live that life doesn't happen automatically. Most of us never lived any part of our adult lives without nicotine. For me I feel that even after 2 years of being nicotine free I'm just beginning to understand and adjust to my new life.
Great post, as usual.
I can relate as I sneak up on two years. I find myself slacking on the role posting, but am also hardly thinking about dip, and I Fucking love it!!!
I feel guilty at times that I'm not posting roll every day, nor am I trying to help as many new quitters as I once did. However, it feels pretty damn good to finally be rolling through life without carrying such a heavy ass sandbag on my shoulders.
Quit on...
Please tell me I didn't just read casual mentions about not posting every day? Wouldn't expect this from you two quitters. Batting 1.000 is the only way. I'm 855 for 855...like fuck. Every damn day.
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Day 774
It's been quite some time since I recorded my quit activity, so here is a quick update. I've been cruising along not even thinking about dip most days, finding myself slacking off at posting roll. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have a good stock of tools in my box to fight the temptations. Today I woke up after a wild dip dream and posted roll. The dream brought me back into reality that I'm always vulnerable. I also had another reminder yesterday, I had one of my last 2 molars on the bottom pulled. Every time I eat I'm reminded of what dip did to me. It's pretty damn hard to eat without teeth.
Every time I see someone join KTC and introduce theirselves and then fail to post roll I think of my 40+ years of not truly understanding what I was dealing with. Nicotine addiction is very powerful, however it's not more powerful than a motivated addict that wants to quit and has the tools (and uses them). I always wanted to quit but not as bad as I wanted to satisfy my craving. The realization that I was completely out of control and that I could never quit on my own lead me to beginning the climb from rock bottom.
Living nicotine free is awesome but that is just the beginning; learning to live that life doesn't happen automatically. Most of us never lived any part of our adult lives without nicotine. For me I feel that even after 2 years of being nicotine free I'm just beginning to understand and adjust to my new life.
Great post, as usual.
I can relate as I sneak up on two years. I find myself slacking on the role posting, but am also hardly thinking about dip, and I Fucking love it!!!
I feel guilty at times that I'm not posting roll every day, nor am I trying to help as many new quitters as I once did. However, it feels pretty damn good to finally be rolling through life without carrying such a heavy ass sandbag on my shoulders.
Quit on...
Please tell me I didn't just read casual mentions about not posting every day? Wouldn't expect this from you two quitters. Batting 1.000 is the only way. I'm 855 for 855...like fuck. Every damn day.
I'm not a 100% poster, but I'm also not advocating to not post roll. 711-0 against the bitch and damn proud of it.
-
Day 774
It's been quite some time since I recorded my quit activity, so here is a quick update. I've been cruising along not even thinking about dip most days, finding myself slacking off at posting roll. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have a good stock of tools in my box to fight the temptations. Today I woke up after a wild dip dream and posted roll. The dream brought me back into reality that I'm always vulnerable. I also had another reminder yesterday, I had one of my last 2 molars on the bottom pulled. Every time I eat I'm reminded of what dip did to me. It's pretty damn hard to eat without teeth.
Every time I see someone join KTC and introduce theirselves and then fail to post roll I think of my 40+ years of not truly understanding what I was dealing with. Nicotine addiction is very powerful, however it's not more powerful than a motivated addict that wants to quit and has the tools (and uses them). I always wanted to quit but not as bad as I wanted to satisfy my craving. The realization that I was completely out of control and that I could never quit on my own lead me to beginning the climb from rock bottom.
Living nicotine free is awesome but that is just the beginning; learning to live that life doesn't happen automatically. Most of us never lived any part of our adult lives without nicotine. For me I feel that even after 2 years of being nicotine free I'm just beginning to understand and adjust to my new life.
Great post, as usual.
I can relate as I sneak up on two years. I find myself slacking on the role posting, but am also hardly thinking about dip, and I Fucking love it!!!
I feel guilty at times that I'm not posting roll every day, nor am I trying to help as many new quitters as I once did. However, it feels pretty damn good to finally be rolling through life without carrying such a heavy ass sandbag on my shoulders.
Quit on...
Please tell me I didn't just read casual mentions about not posting every day? Wouldn't expect this from you two quitters. Batting 1.000 is the only way. I'm 855 for 855...like fuck. Every damn day.
I'm not a 100% poster, but I'm also not advocating to not post roll. 711-0 against the bitch and damn proud of it.
Just want to see you here every day big Diesel...that's all I'm saying. For the record....I'm actually 856 for 856. I have to track days by other quitters...aka Cbird minus 11.
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This is an incredible story and an inspirational thread. Thank you all.
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Day 774
It's been quite some time since I recorded my quit activity, so here is a quick update. I've been cruising along not even thinking about dip most days, finding myself slacking off at posting roll. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have a good stock of tools in my box to fight the temptations. Today I woke up after a wild dip dream and posted roll. The dream brought me back into reality that I'm always vulnerable. I also had another reminder yesterday, I had one of my last 2 molars on the bottom pulled. Every time I eat I'm reminded of what dip did to me. It's pretty damn hard to eat without teeth.
Every time I see someone join KTC and introduce theirselves and then fail to post roll I think of my 40+ years of not truly understanding what I was dealing with. Nicotine addiction is very powerful, however it's not more powerful than a motivated addict that wants to quit and has the tools (and uses them). I always wanted to quit but not as bad as I wanted to satisfy my craving. The realization that I was completely out of control and that I could never quit on my own lead me to beginning the climb from rock bottom.
Living nicotine free is awesome but that is just the beginning; learning to live that life doesn't happen automatically. Most of us never lived any part of our adult lives without nicotine. For me I feel that even after 2 years of being nicotine free I'm just beginning to understand and adjust to my new life.
Great post, as usual.
I can relate as I sneak up on two years. I find myself slacking on the role posting, but am also hardly thinking about dip, and I Fucking love it!!!
I feel guilty at times that I'm not posting roll every day, nor am I trying to help as many new quitters as I once did. However, it feels pretty damn good to finally be rolling through life without carrying such a heavy ass sandbag on my shoulders.
Quit on...
Please tell me I didn't just read casual mentions about not posting every day? Wouldn't expect this from you two quitters. Batting 1.000 is the only way. I'm 855 for 855...like fuck. Every damn day.
I'm not a 100% poster, but I'm also not advocating to not post roll. 711-0 against the bitch and damn proud of it.
Just want to see you here every day big Diesel...that's all I'm saying. For the record....I'm actually 856 for 856. I have to track days by other quitters...aka Cbird minus 11.
Can't get rid of me. I'm like the clap, I ain't going nowhere.
-
Day 774
It's been quite some time since I recorded my quit activity, so here is a quick update. I've been cruising along not even thinking about dip most days, finding myself slacking off at posting roll. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have a good stock of tools in my box to fight the temptations. Today I woke up after a wild dip dream and posted roll. The dream brought me back into reality that I'm always vulnerable. I also had another reminder yesterday, I had one of my last 2 molars on the bottom pulled. Every time I eat I'm reminded of what dip did to me. It's pretty damn hard to eat without teeth.
Every time I see someone join KTC and introduce theirselves and then fail to post roll I think of my 40+ years of not truly understanding what I was dealing with. Nicotine addiction is very powerful, however it's not more powerful than a motivated addict that wants to quit and has the tools (and uses them). I always wanted to quit but not as bad as I wanted to satisfy my craving. The realization that I was completely out of control and that I could never quit on my own lead me to beginning the climb from rock bottom.
Living nicotine free is awesome but that is just the beginning; learning to live that life doesn't happen automatically. Most of us never lived any part of our adult lives without nicotine. For me I feel that even after 2 years of being nicotine free I'm just beginning to understand and adjust to my new life.
Great post, as usual.
I can relate as I sneak up on two years. I find myself slacking on the role posting, but am also hardly thinking about dip, and I Fucking love it!!!
I feel guilty at times that I'm not posting roll every day, nor am I trying to help as many new quitters as I once did. However, it feels pretty damn good to finally be rolling through life without carrying such a heavy ass sandbag on my shoulders.
Quit on...
Please tell me I didn't just read casual mentions about not posting every day? Wouldn't expect this from you two quitters. Batting 1.000 is the only way. I'm 855 for 855...like fuck. Every damn day.
I'm not a 100% poster, but I'm also not advocating to not post roll. 711-0 against the bitch and damn proud of it.
Just want to see you here every day big Diesel...that's all I'm saying. For the record....I'm actually 856 for 856. I have to track days by other quitters...aka Cbird minus 11.
Can't get rid of me. I'm like the clap, I ain't going nowhere.
I was a 100% poster for a year and a half and I'm not advocating anyone not posting roll. I've been active for over two years now, just a little less than 100 days behind you coach and respect your quit and your activity outside of posting roll. I find myself learning to live life without KTC on a daily basis and for me some day down the road I plan to be able to gain the strength to resist the temptations. Until that day comes I will post roll frequently, maybe not daily but I have tools that are working for me. Of the thousands that quit posting at 100 days very few probably stay clean, for those that quit posting after 1 year I'm sure the % is better. For WT I'm far from ready to fool myself into thinking I'm ready to be weaned. I had two previous pauses of 3+ years each. Does that mean I'm as susceptible of caving now as I was in 1982 or 1995? No, I'm a different person, have different reasons for quitting and have tools I never had then. Am I cocky in saying I don't post daily? No, I'm just telling my story and expressing my feelings about my quit. Most of my tools to stay quit have been gained from KTC and my friends here but not all of them. I found an addiction recovery group (12 step) almost a year ago and I attend these meetings weekly with my wife. This group has become a very important part of my quit, these addicts are in my community and we share more than just addictions.
I find that the things I did in the past to pay forward the strength I received from the likes of you Coach are being filled by many strong quitters. The cycle of quitting, gaining confidence, paying forward your quit and gaining the ability to adjust to living life nicotine free is great to watch. The events that lead me to post this thread initially was one of those moments that reminded me of my addiction and my vulnerability. But I was also reminded of why I'm quit, where I've come from, what I need to do to remain quit and all those that have influenced my life this past 2+ years.
-
Day 774
It's been quite some time since I recorded my quit activity, so here is a quick update. I've been cruising along not even thinking about dip most days, finding myself slacking off at posting roll. I'm still an addict and always will be but I have a good stock of tools in my box to fight the temptations. Today I woke up after a wild dip dream and posted roll. The dream brought me back into reality that I'm always vulnerable. I also had another reminder yesterday, I had one of my last 2 molars on the bottom pulled. Every time I eat I'm reminded of what dip did to me. It's pretty damn hard to eat without teeth.
Every time I see someone join KTC and introduce theirselves and then fail to post roll I think of my 40+ years of not truly understanding what I was dealing with. Nicotine addiction is very powerful, however it's not more powerful than a motivated addict that wants to quit and has the tools (and uses them). I always wanted to quit but not as bad as I wanted to satisfy my craving. The realization that I was completely out of control and that I could never quit on my own lead me to beginning the climb from rock bottom.
Living nicotine free is awesome but that is just the beginning; learning to live that life doesn't happen automatically. Most of us never lived any part of our adult lives without nicotine. For me I feel that even after 2 years of being nicotine free I'm just beginning to understand and adjust to my new life.
Great post, as usual.
I can relate as I sneak up on two years. I find myself slacking on the role posting, but am also hardly thinking about dip, and I Fucking love it!!!
I feel guilty at times that I'm not posting roll every day, nor am I trying to help as many new quitters as I once did. However, it feels pretty damn good to finally be rolling through life without carrying such a heavy ass sandbag on my shoulders.
Quit on...
Please tell me I didn't just read casual mentions about not posting every day? Wouldn't expect this from you two quitters. Batting 1.000 is the only way. I'm 855 for 855...like fuck. Every damn day.
I'm not a 100% poster, but I'm also not advocating to not post roll. 711-0 against the bitch and damn proud of it.
Just want to see you here every day big Diesel...that's all I'm saying. For the record....I'm actually 856 for 856. I have to track days by other quitters...aka Cbird minus 11.
Can't get rid of me. I'm like the clap, I ain't going nowhere.
I was a 100% poster for a year and a half and I'm not advocating anyone not posting roll. I've been active for over two years now, just a little less than 100 days behind you coach and respect your quit and your activity outside of posting roll. I find myself learning to live life without KTC on a daily basis and for me some day down the road I plan to be able to gain the strength to resist the temptations. Until that day comes I will post roll frequently, maybe not daily but I have tools that are working for me. Of the thousands that quit posting at 100 days very few probably stay clean, for those that quit posting after 1 year I'm sure the % is better. For WT I'm far from ready to fool myself into thinking I'm ready to be weaned. I had two previous pauses of 3+ years each. Does that mean I'm as susceptible of caving now as I was in 1982 or 1995? No, I'm a different person, have different reasons for quitting and have tools I never had then. Am I cocky in saying I don't post daily? No, I'm just telling my story and expressing my feelings about my quit. Most of my tools to stay quit have been gained from KTC and my friends here but not all of them. I found an addiction recovery group (12 step) almost a year ago and I attend these meetings weekly with my wife. This group has become a very important part of my quit, these addicts are in my community and we share more than just addictions.
I find that the things I did in the past to pay forward the strength I received from the likes of you Coach are being filled by many strong quitters. The cycle of quitting, gaining confidence, paying forward your quit and gaining the ability to adjust to living life nicotine free is great to watch. The events that lead me to post this thread initially was one of those moments that reminded me of my addiction and my vulnerability. But I was also reminded of why I'm quit, where I've come from, what I need to do to remain quit and all those that have influenced my life this past 2+ years.
I miss roll occasionally as well. Most of the time it's because I completely forget and/or think I already posted roll because I've been doing it for over two years and the days sometimes run into each other. For example, I forgot to post roll on Wednesday, but I didn't even notice I forgot until I posted on Thursday. It's certainly not a conscious decision to miss roll on those days.
I still plan on posting roll for the foreseeable future, but yes, I might miss a day here and there mainly due to my absent mindedness and my 40 year old brain that forgets things these days that my 20 year old brain would have never forgotten. 'spin'
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'Birthday'
:wub:
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Time for a update and report on the bitch in my life; day 835, I live and cherish my freedom. For several months now I've suffered from difficulty swallowing and been waiting for an appointment with my gastroenterologist. Today I went in and had a upper GI endoscope. I've feared that I could feel a growth and had the fear that my 4 decades of dip was going to kill me even though I've quit. Well they stretched my esophagus and took quite a few biopsies from my mouth to my small intestine. Waiting for pathology, but not too concerned the Dr was very optimistic. I'm glad I quit when I did and that it wasn't motivated by a scare like this has been. If I'd quite in fear I would have probably stopped on the way home to get my fix. Why do I think I'd do that? I've been there before. I'm glad that everyday, I'm quit, my odds of cancer from dip decrease. Sure we will always have an elevated risk of cancer but not nearly as high as if we were still using.
I watch so many 20 something's and youngers come here gung-ho to quit and fade away as they realize how difficult it is. As a old fart I wish there was some way I could connect to them and make them understand how fast time passes and how they will wake up some day and realize they have thrown decades away living with this evil addiction. Addiction no matter what it is is a vile thief; they steal our lives, time, families, self respect, money and so much more. My ultimate conclusion, I can't quit for anyone else! I quit one day at a time for myself.
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WT57 - Your a true inspiration. I quit with you today.
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Time for a update and report on the bitch in my life; day 835, I live and cherish my freedom. For several months now I've suffered from difficulty swallowing and been waiting for an appointment with my gastroenterologist. Today I went in and had a upper GI endoscope. I've feared that I could feel a growth and had the fear that my 4 decades of dip was going to kill me even though I've quit. Well they stretched my esophagus and took quite a few biopsies from my mouth to my small intestine. Waiting for pathology, but not too concerned the Dr was very optimistic. I'm glad I quit when I did and that it wasn't motivated by a scare like this has been. If I'd quite in fear I would have probably stopped on the way home to get my fix. Why do I think I'd do that? I've been there before. I'm glad that everyday, I'm quit, my odds of cancer from dip decrease. Sure we will always have an elevated risk of cancer but not nearly as high as if we were still using.
I watch so many 20 something's and youngers come here gung-ho to quit and fade away as they realize how difficult it is. As a old fart I wish there was some way I could connect to them and make them understand how fast time passes and how they will wake up some day and realize they have thrown decades away living with this evil addiction. Addiction no matter what it is is a vile thief; they steal our lives, time, families, self respect, money and so much more. My ultimate conclusion, I can't quit for anyone else! I quit one day at a time for myself.
Prayers man.
With you.
-
Time for a update and report on the bitch in my life; day 835, I live and cherish my freedom. For several months now I've suffered from difficulty swallowing and been waiting for an appointment with my gastroenterologist. Today I went in and had a upper GI endoscope. I've feared that I could feel a growth and had the fear that my 4 decades of dip was going to kill me even though I've quit. Well they stretched my esophagus and took quite a few biopsies from my mouth to my small intestine. Waiting for pathology, but not too concerned the Dr was very optimistic. I'm glad I quit when I did and that it wasn't motivated by a scare like this has been. If I'd quite in fear I would have probably stopped on the way home to get my fix. Why do I think I'd do that? I've been there before. I'm glad that everyday, I'm quit, my odds of cancer from dip decrease. Sure we will always have an elevated risk of cancer but not nearly as high as if we were still using.
I watch so many 20 something's and youngers come here gung-ho to quit and fade away as they realize how difficult it is. As a old fart I wish there was some way I could connect to them and make them understand how fast time passes and how they will wake up some day and realize they have thrown decades away living with this evil addiction. Addiction no matter what it is is a vile thief; they steal our lives, time, families, self respect, money and so much more. My ultimate conclusion, I can't quit for anyone else! I quit one day at a time for myself.
Prayers man.
With you.
With you brother!
-
Time for a update and report on the bitch in my life; day 835, I live and cherish my freedom. For several months now I've suffered from difficulty swallowing and been waiting for an appointment with my gastroenterologist. Today I went in and had a upper GI endoscope. I've feared that I could feel a growth and had the fear that my 4 decades of dip was going to kill me even though I've quit. Well they stretched my esophagus and took quite a few biopsies from my mouth to my small intestine. Waiting for pathology, but not too concerned the Dr was very optimistic. I'm glad I quit when I did and that it wasn't motivated by a scare like this has been. If I'd quite in fear I would have probably stopped on the way home to get my fix. Why do I think I'd do that? I've been there before. I'm glad that everyday, I'm quit, my odds of cancer from dip decrease. Sure we will always have an elevated risk of cancer but not nearly as high as if we were still using.
I watch so many 20 something's and youngers come here gung-ho to quit and fade away as they realize how difficult it is. As a old fart I wish there was some way I could connect to them and make them understand how fast time passes and how they will wake up some day and realize they have thrown decades away living with this evil addiction. Addiction no matter what it is is a vile thief; they steal our lives, time, families, self respect, money and so much more. My ultimate conclusion, I can't quit for anyone else! I quit one day at a time for myself.
Prayers man.
With you.
all in with ya brother
-
Time for a update and report on the bitch in my life; day 835, I live and cherish my freedom. For several months now I've suffered from difficulty swallowing and been waiting for an appointment with my gastroenterologist. Today I went in and had a upper GI endoscope. I've feared that I could feel a growth and had the fear that my 4 decades of dip was going to kill me even though I've quit. Well they stretched my esophagus and took quite a few biopsies from my mouth to my small intestine. Waiting for pathology, but not too concerned the Dr was very optimistic. I'm glad I quit when I did and that it wasn't motivated by a scare like this has been. If I'd quite in fear I would have probably stopped on the way home to get my fix. Why do I think I'd do that? I've been there before. I'm glad that everyday, I'm quit, my odds of cancer from dip decrease. Sure we will always have an elevated risk of cancer but not nearly as high as if we were still using.
I watch so many 20 something's and youngers come here gung-ho to quit and fade away as they realize how difficult it is. As a old fart I wish there was some way I could connect to them and make them understand how fast time passes and how they will wake up some day and realize they have thrown decades away living with this evil addiction. Addiction no matter what it is is a vile thief; they steal our lives, time, families, self respect, money and so much more. My ultimate conclusion, I can't quit for anyone else! I quit one day at a time for myself.
Prayers man.
With you.
all in with ya brother
Prayers
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Time for a update and report on the bitch in my life; day 835, I live and cherish my freedom. For several months now I've suffered from difficulty swallowing and been waiting for an appointment with my gastroenterologist. Today I went in and had a upper GI endoscope. I've feared that I could feel a growth and had the fear that my 4 decades of dip was going to kill me even though I've quit. Well they stretched my esophagus and took quite a few biopsies from my mouth to my small intestine. Waiting for pathology, but not too concerned the Dr was very optimistic. I'm glad I quit when I did and that it wasn't motivated by a scare like this has been. If I'd quite in fear I would have probably stopped on the way home to get my fix. Why do I think I'd do that? I've been there before. I'm glad that everyday, I'm quit, my odds of cancer from dip decrease. Sure we will always have an elevated risk of cancer but not nearly as high as if we were still using.
I watch so many 20 something's and youngers come here gung-ho to quit and fade away as they realize how difficult it is. As a old fart I wish there was some way I could connect to them and make them understand how fast time passes and how they will wake up some day and realize they have thrown decades away living with this evil addiction. Addiction no matter what it is is a vile thief; they steal our lives, time, families, self respect, money and so much more. My ultimate conclusion, I can't quit for anyone else! I quit one day at a time for myself.
Prayers man.
With you.
all in with ya brother
Prayers
prayers are with you, friend
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Time for a update and report on the bitch in my life; day 835, I live and cherish my freedom. For several months now I've suffered from difficulty swallowing and been waiting for an appointment with my gastroenterologist. Today I went in and had a upper GI endoscope. I've feared that I could feel a growth and had the fear that my 4 decades of dip was going to kill me even though I've quit. Well they stretched my esophagus and took quite a few biopsies from my mouth to my small intestine. Waiting for pathology, but not too concerned the Dr was very optimistic. I'm glad I quit when I did and that it wasn't motivated by a scare like this has been. If I'd quite in fear I would have probably stopped on the way home to get my fix. Why do I think I'd do that? I've been there before. I'm glad that everyday, I'm quit, my odds of cancer from dip decrease. Sure we will always have an elevated risk of cancer but not nearly as high as if we were still using.
I watch so many 20 something's and youngers come here gung-ho to quit and fade away as they realize how difficult it is. As a old fart I wish there was some way I could connect to them and make them understand how fast time passes and how they will wake up some day and realize they have thrown decades away living with this evil addiction. Addiction no matter what it is is a vile thief; they steal our lives, time, families, self respect, money and so much more. My ultimate conclusion, I can't quit for anyone else! I quit one day at a time for myself.
Prayers man.
With you.
With you brother!
You da man, WT. Hope all results come back clean.
Keep showing these young whipper snappers how it's done
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WT, I am one of the 20 something year olds that you mentioned. When I feel the initial quit surge falling off, I will remember what you wrote. Rest assured that you made a difference in at least one young quitter's life. Thank you.
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Prayers, wt. Not as old, but not young either. I wish I could go back and punch myself in the face for ever starting. I knew better.
Let us know when you get the results. Glad the doc is optimistic.
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Time for a update and report on the bitch in my life; day 835, I live and cherish my freedom. For several months now I've suffered from difficulty swallowing and been waiting for an appointment with my gastroenterologist. Today I went in and had a upper GI endoscope. I've feared that I could feel a growth and had the fear that my 4 decades of dip was going to kill me even though I've quit. Well they stretched my esophagus and took quite a few biopsies from my mouth to my small intestine. Waiting for pathology, but not too concerned the Dr was very optimistic. I'm glad I quit when I did and that it wasn't motivated by a scare like this has been. If I'd quite in fear I would have probably stopped on the way home to get my fix. Why do I think I'd do that? I've been there before. I'm glad that everyday, I'm quit, my odds of cancer from dip decrease. Sure we will always have an elevated risk of cancer but not nearly as high as if we were still using.
I watch so many 20 something's and youngers come here gung-ho to quit and fade away as they realize how difficult it is. As a old fart I wish there was some way I could connect to them and make them understand how fast time passes and how they will wake up some day and realize they have thrown decades away living with this evil addiction. Addiction no matter what it is is a vile thief; they steal our lives, time, families, self respect, money and so much more. My ultimate conclusion, I can't quit for anyone else! I quit one day at a time for myself.
Prayers man.
With you.
With you brother!
You da man, WT. Hope all results come back clean.
Keep showing these young whipper snappers how it's done
WT you've inspired me from day 1.
Thinking of you and your tests today.
I'm glad you are here and not in line at the local poison store.
Your odds have decreased significantly. You're the quit Man, period
we dipped for ourselves, we quit ODAAT for ourselves.
I quit with you Today brother.
prayers and thoughts to you.
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Day 846-
For over a week I've known family plans for a road trip and family get together. And knew I'd be traveling home alone a day early. For most of that time the bitch has been trying to mess with my mind. I've thought how nice it would be to have her accompany me on the ride home. Now after two stressful days of with the inlaws and leaving for my drive home in the morning I'm still fighting within my own mind. I've just said all along that if I make my promise I'll be safe. Now here I am at 12 minutes past midnight and I'm waiting till morning to post roll. I know that in order for me to cave I have several people that I've got to get permission from first. I know none of them will grant permission and quite frankly I have too much respect for them to put them in that situation. I have no idea why, but this is the closest I've been to caving since I quit. I've been afraid of this day all week now that I'm just hours away I'm still stressing about it. I'm gonna get some sleep now and be back in a few hours when I'm thinking clearer.
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Day 846-
For over a week I've known family plans for a road trip and family get together. And knew I'd be traveling home alone a day early. For most of that time the bitch has been trying to mess with my mind. I've thought how nice it would be to have her accompany me on the ride home. Now after two stressful days of with the inlaws and leaving for my drive home in the morning I'm still fighting within my own mind. I've just said all along that if I make my promise I'll be safe. Now here I am at 12 minutes past midnight and I'm waiting till morning to post roll. I know that in order for me to cave I have several people that I've got to get permission from first. I know none of them will grant permission and quite frankly I have too much respect for them to put them in that situation. I have no idea why, but this is the closest I've been to caving since I quit. I've been afraid of this day all week now that I'm just hours away I'm still stressing about it. I'm gonna get some sleep now and be back in a few hours when I'm thinking clearer.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
You are so far along now, you can reason with this idea. You know all the answers. Your tool box is FULL. You know you cannot have 'just one'. You also know there are too many people here that are willing to sit this out with you. It's 7:00 on Sat morning. I should be asleep right now, but I'm here, reaching out bro.
You can do this.
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Day 846-
For over a week I've known family plans for a road trip and family get together. And knew I'd be traveling home alone a day early. For most of that time the bitch has been trying to mess with my mind. I've thought how nice it would be to have her accompany me on the ride home. Now after two stressful days of with the inlaws and leaving for my drive home in the morning I'm still fighting within my own mind. I've just said all along that if I make my promise I'll be safe. Now here I am at 12 minutes past midnight and I'm waiting till morning to post roll. I know that in order for me to cave I have several people that I've got to get permission from first. I know none of them will grant permission and quite frankly I have too much respect for them to put them in that situation. I have no idea why, but this is the closest I've been to caving since I quit. I've been afraid of this day all week now that I'm just hours away I'm still stressing about it. I'm gonna get some sleep now and be back in a few hours when I'm thinking clearer.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
You are so far along now, you can reason with this idea. You know all the answers. Your tool box is FULL. You know you cannot have 'just one'. You also know there are too many people here that are willing to sit this out with you. It's 7:00 on Sat morning. I should be asleep right now, but I'm here, reaching out bro.
You can do this.
Its o730 and i'm right here to my friend. What a crazy thought for someone that has way to much knowledge. I don't see wt considering this for 1 second. You know that there is not just a ride home with the poison. It would not stop there. It would then turn into an evening stuffing your face with the poison. It would then lead to the morning, where you would not be able to begin your day without the poison. It would then lead to having the poison while you were sitting around doing nothing. Before you know it,,, You wouldn't be able to make it 30 minutes without needing a lip full of the poison and slavery would be your life.
NAAAAAAAAAAAA,, I don't see wt falling for this load of bull shi@@. Get some fire balls and enjoy the ride. Check out the scenery and enjoy a life where the poison does not rule.
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Day 846-
For over a week I've known family plans for a road trip and family get together. And knew I'd be traveling home alone a day early. For most of that time the bitch has been trying to mess with my mind. I've thought how nice it would be to have her accompany me on the ride home. Now after two stressful days of with the inlaws and leaving for my drive home in the morning I'm still fighting within my own mind. I've just said all along that if I make my promise I'll be safe. Now here I am at 12 minutes past midnight and I'm waiting till morning to post roll. I know that in order for me to cave I have several people that I've got to get permission from first. I know none of them will grant permission and quite frankly I have too much respect for them to put them in that situation. I have no idea why, but this is the closest I've been to caving since I quit. I've been afraid of this day all week now that I'm just hours away I'm still stressing about it. I'm gonna get some sleep now and be back in a few hours when I'm thinking clearer.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
You are so far along now, you can reason with this idea. You know all the answers. Your tool box is FULL. You know you cannot have 'just one'. You also know there are too many people here that are willing to sit this out with you. It's 7:00 on Sat morning. I should be asleep right now, but I'm here, reaching out bro.
You can do this.
Its o730 and i'm right here to my friend. What a crazy thought for someone that has way to much knowledge. I don't see wt considering this for 1 second. You know that there is not just a ride home with the poison. It would not stop there. It would then turn into an evening stuffing your face with the poison. It would then lead to the morning, where you would not be able to begin your day without the poison. It would then lead to having the poison while you were sitting around doing nothing. Before you know it,,, You wouldn't be able to make it 30 minutes without needing a lip full of the poison and slavery would be your life.
NAAAAAAAAAAAA,, I don't see wt falling for this load of bull shi@@. Get some fire balls and enjoy the ride. Check out the scenery and enjoy a life where the poison does not rule.
Fireballs rock. Get some gum too, and not that big league chew or the crap they sell in a tin either.
Crank up the radio and ride proud. I always find the worrying about a perceived caving situation to be worse than the situation turns out to be. You got this wt.
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Thanks! After some sleep, breathing and clearer thinking I just posted roll. To be completely honest I hesitated, kinda wanting to leave the door open, but when it came down to it I know how foolish that would be. I mentioned last night I had too much respect for my quit brothers and sisters to ask for permission to cave. Well I have too much respect for myself and my quit to cave. The thought of throwing 846 days away for a pinch or two of poison would be so foolish. My name on the roll in the BOQ and 2012 group insures I'm proudly quit for another day. I took the option of caving away by that simple action. There is amazing power in posting roll!
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Thanks! After some sleep, breathing and clearer thinking I just posted roll. To be completely honest I hesitated, kinda wanting to leave the door open, but when it came down to it I know how foolish that would be. I mentioned last night I had too much respect for my quit brothers and sisters to ask for permission to cave. Well I have too much respect for myself and my quit to cave. The thought of throwing 846 days away for a pinch or two of poison would be so foolish. My name on the roll in the BOQ and 2012 group insures I'm proudly quit for another day. I took the option of caving away by that simple action. There is amazing power in posting roll!
wt - just read your intro. Our paths are very similiar. Don't be gettin flaky on old ES with your quit...i'm looking to you for my support. Us old dogs run in packs. Tell sweetie the nic bitch to "take a suck"....there, it only took me 20 minutes to type this.
Quit on with you wt
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Thanks! After some sleep, breathing and clearer thinking I just posted roll. To be completely honest I hesitated, kinda wanting to leave the door open, but when it came down to it I know how foolish that would be. I mentioned last night I had too much respect for my quit brothers and sisters to ask for permission to cave. Well I have too much respect for myself and my quit to cave. The thought of throwing 846 days away for a pinch or two of poison would be so foolish. My name on the roll in the BOQ and 2012 group insures I'm proudly quit for another day. I took the option of caving away by that simple action. There is amazing power in posting roll!
wt - just read your intro. Our paths are very similiar. Don't be gettin flaky on old ES with your quit...i'm looking to you for my support. Us old dogs run in packs. Tell sweetie the nic bitch to "take a suck"....there, it only took me 20 minutes to type this.
Quit on with you wt
Post roll every day. Don't skip days. Do it as soon as you wake up.
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Another day, a new floor, I need to record for me what my life is like at this milestone.
I have many tools in my tool box that help me stay quit. Different tools are needed for each confrontation with my addiction. On the farm I have lots of tools and do a lot of repairs and maintenance but I'm really reckless at times and misplace my tools or let them get rusty. My son in law on the other hand babies his tools, cleans them continually and always knows where they are at. I have tried to guard my quit tools with the same care my son in law gives his tools. The quit tools aren't something that you can hold in your hands but they can be kept close at hand and be honed to work well. Occasionally I've come across situations that have required specialty tools to deal with the situation. Some tools may not be used very often but they are in my tool box, clean and ready if they are needed.
The past 100 days have been a struggle for me, I have been trying to advance past the things that I used nicotine to avoid. Through a 12 step addiction recovery program I've learned a great deal about myself that I really haven't wanted to face. One of the more difficult things I've been working on is seeking forgiveness. Like many others I robbed members of my family, that right I actually sole from them. Nicotine took precedence over everything, I'm total embarrassed of how selfish I was for all those decades and so sad that I missed all of those moments of my daughter growing up. Actually I was telling my wife the other day that I don't remember the 80's, 90's and most of 2000's. Why? Nicotine was the only thing I thought of, period! My every moment was concentrated on how I was going to get away to spend time with my mistress. (I'm so glad that bitch is dead.) I'm moving forward ODAAT not just in quitting but in living and working at repairing my past failures by never allowing my priorities to get mixed up.
Thank You to everyone. I'll see you tomorrow!
-
Another day, a new floor, I need to record for me what my life is like at this milestone.
I have many tools in my tool box that help me stay quit. Different tools are needed for each confrontation with my addiction. On the farm I have lots of tools and do a lot of repairs and maintenance but I'm really reckless at times and misplace my tools or let them get rusty. My son in law on the other hand babies his tools, cleans them continually and always knows where they are at. I have tried to guard my quit tools with the same care my son in law gives his tools. The quit tools aren't something that you can hold in your hands but they can be kept close at hand and be honed to work well. Occasionally I've come across situations that have required specialty tools to deal with the situation. Some tools may not be used very often but they are in my tool box, clean and ready if they are needed.
The past 100 days have been a struggle for me, I have been trying to advance past the things that I used nicotine to avoid. Through a 12 step addiction recovery program I've learned a great deal about myself that I really haven't wanted to face. One of the more difficult things I've been working on is seeking forgiveness. Like many others I robbed members of my family, that right I actually sole from them. Nicotine took precedence over everything, I'm total embarrassed of how selfish I was for all those decades and so sad that I missed all of those moments of my daughter growing up. Actually I was telling my wife the other day that I don't remember the 80's, 90's and most of 2000's. Why? Nicotine was the only thing I thought of, period! My every moment was concentrated on how I was going to get away to spend time with my mistress. (I'm so glad that bitch is dead.) I'm moving forward ODAAT not just in quitting but in living and working at repairing my past failures by never allowing my priorities to get mixed up.
Thank You to everyone. I'll see you tomorrow!
Oh boy. You've been in my head again. We are so alike.
I feel what you're saying and doing. I'm doing what you're doing.
Some days suck, some days are fantastic. Everyday we are Free men. ODAAT.
I'll take my sucky day over a nic filled day everytime! We've given enough to the poison and her corporate pimps.
It's time for us to live as we are meant. Free. Free to live and love as a father, husband and friend to those who care. Free to love ourselves enough to be quit and pay it forward ODAAT.
Thank you for posting. Quit wood for a week now. Quit with you everyday that ends with a y.
-
Another day, a new floor, I need to record for me what my life is like at this milestone.
I have many tools in my tool box that help me stay quit. Different tools are needed for each confrontation with my addiction. On the farm I have lots of tools and do a lot of repairs and maintenance but I'm really reckless at times and misplace my tools or let them get rusty. My son in law on the other hand babies his tools, cleans them continually and always knows where they are at. I have tried to guard my quit tools with the same care my son in law gives his tools. The quit tools aren't something that you can hold in your hands but they can be kept close at hand and be honed to work well. Occasionally I've come across situations that have required specialty tools to deal with the situation. Some tools may not be used very often but they are in my tool box, clean and ready if they are needed.
The past 100 days have been a struggle for me, I have been trying to advance past the things that I used nicotine to avoid. Through a 12 step addiction recovery program I've learned a great deal about myself that I really haven't wanted to face. One of the more difficult things I've been working on is seeking forgiveness. Like many others I robbed members of my family, that right I actually sole from them. Nicotine took precedence over everything, I'm total embarrassed of how selfish I was for all those decades and so sad that I missed all of those moments of my daughter growing up. Actually I was telling my wife the other day that I don't remember the 80's, 90's and most of 2000's. Why? Nicotine was the only thing I thought of, period! My every moment was concentrated on how I was going to get away to spend time with my mistress. (I'm so glad that bitch is dead.) I'm moving forward ODAAT not just in quitting but in living and working at repairing my past failures by never allowing my priorities to get mixed up.
Thank You to everyone. I'll see you tomorrow!
Oh boy. You've been in my head again. We are so alike.
I feel what you're saying and doing. I'm doing what you're doing.
Some days suck, some days are fantastic. Everyday we are Free men. ODAAT.
I'll take my sucky day over a nic filled day everytime! We've given enough to the poison and her corporate pimps.
It's time for us to live as we are meant. Free. Free to live and love as a father, husband and friend to those who care. Free to love ourselves enough to be quit and pay it forward ODAAT.
Thank you for posting. Quit wood for a week now. Quit with you everyday that ends with a y.
Thanks for posting this Wt. I too have feelings similar to yours about the time away from important things my addiction demanded. I try to focus on the brighter future of being free from nicotine but sometimes it is difficult to forget about the past. The "I wish I had the strength to quit 20 years ago" is on my mind a lot. I wish I knew how to just let it go.
-
Another day, a new floor, I need to record for me what my life is like at this milestone.
I have many tools in my tool box that help me stay quit. Different tools are needed for each confrontation with my addiction. On the farm I have lots of tools and do a lot of repairs and maintenance but I'm really reckless at times and misplace my tools or let them get rusty. My son in law on the other hand babies his tools, cleans them continually and always knows where they are at. I have tried to guard my quit tools with the same care my son in law gives his tools. The quit tools aren't something that you can hold in your hands but they can be kept close at hand and be honed to work well. Occasionally I've come across situations that have required specialty tools to deal with the situation. Some tools may not be used very often but they are in my tool box, clean and ready if they are needed.
The past 100 days have been a struggle for me, I have been trying to advance past the things that I used nicotine to avoid. Through a 12 step addiction recovery program I've learned a great deal about myself that I really haven't wanted to face. One of the more difficult things I've been working on is seeking forgiveness. Like many others I robbed members of my family, that right I actually sole from them. Nicotine took precedence over everything, I'm total embarrassed of how selfish I was for all those decades and so sad that I missed all of those moments of my daughter growing up. Actually I was telling my wife the other day that I don't remember the 80's, 90's and most of 2000's. Why? Nicotine was the only thing I thought of, period! My every moment was concentrated on how I was going to get away to spend time with my mistress. (I'm so glad that bitch is dead.) I'm moving forward ODAAT not just in quitting but in living and working at repairing my past failures by never allowing my priorities to get mixed up.
Thank You to everyone. I'll see you tomorrow!
Oh boy. You've been in my head again. We are so alike.
I feel what you're saying and doing. I'm doing what you're doing.
Some days suck, some days are fantastic. Everyday we are Free men. ODAAT.
I'll take my sucky day over a nic filled day everytime! We've given enough to the poison and her corporate pimps.
It's time for us to live as we are meant. Free. Free to live and love as a father, husband and friend to those who care. Free to love ourselves enough to be quit and pay it forward ODAAT.
Thank you for posting. Quit wood for a week now. Quit with you everyday that ends with a y.
Thanks for posting this Wt. I too have feelings similar to yours about the time away from important things my addiction demanded. I try to focus on the brighter future of being free from nicotine but sometimes it is difficult to forget about the past. The "I wish I had the strength to quit 20 years ago" is on my mind a lot. I wish I knew how to just let it go.
I hope that everyone under the age of 30 will read this, and truly learn the regrets that some of us of a certain age have with our addictions. Quit in your 20's, and stay quit. Great post Wt.
-
Another day, a new floor, I need to record for me what my life is like at this milestone.
I have many tools in my tool box that help me stay quit. Different tools are needed for each confrontation with my addiction. On the farm I have lots of tools and do a lot of repairs and maintenance but I'm really reckless at times and misplace my tools or let them get rusty. My son in law on the other hand babies his tools, cleans them continually and always knows where they are at. I have tried to guard my quit tools with the same care my son in law gives his tools. The quit tools aren't something that you can hold in your hands but they can be kept close at hand and be honed to work well. Occasionally I've come across situations that have required specialty tools to deal with the situation. Some tools may not be used very often but they are in my tool box, clean and ready if they are needed.
The past 100 days have been a struggle for me, I have been trying to advance past the things that I used nicotine to avoid. Through a 12 step addiction recovery program I've learned a great deal about myself that I really haven't wanted to face. One of the more difficult things I've been working on is seeking forgiveness. Like many others I robbed members of my family, that right I actually sole from them. Nicotine took precedence over everything, I'm total embarrassed of how selfish I was for all those decades and so sad that I missed all of those moments of my daughter growing up. Actually I was telling my wife the other day that I don't remember the 80's, 90's and most of 2000's. Why? Nicotine was the only thing I thought of, period! My every moment was concentrated on how I was going to get away to spend time with my mistress. (I'm so glad that bitch is dead.) I'm moving forward ODAAT not just in quitting but in living and working at repairing my past failures by never allowing my priorities to get mixed up.
Thank You to everyone. I'll see you tomorrow!
Oh boy. You've been in my head again. We are so alike.
I feel what you're saying and doing. I'm doing what you're doing.
Some days suck, some days are fantastic. Everyday we are Free men. ODAAT.
I'll take my sucky day over a nic filled day everytime! We've given enough to the poison and her corporate pimps.
It's time for us to live as we are meant. Free. Free to live and love as a father, husband and friend to those who care. Free to love ourselves enough to be quit and pay it forward ODAAT.
Thank you for posting. Quit wood for a week now. Quit with you everyday that ends with a y.
Thanks for posting this Wt. I too have feelings similar to yours about the time away from important things my addiction demanded. I try to focus on the brighter future of being free from nicotine but sometimes it is difficult to forget about the past. The "I wish I had the strength to quit 20 years ago" is on my mind a lot. I wish I knew how to just let it go.
I hope that everyone under the age of 30 will read this, and truly learn the regrets that some of us of a certain age have with our addictions. Quit in your 20's, and stay quit. Great post Wt.
Powerful stuff. Really glad you shared this for all of us to read. It helped my quit today! Thank you!
Quit on!
-
Another day, a new floor, I need to record for me what my life is like at this milestone.
I have many tools in my tool box that help me stay quit. Different tools are needed for each confrontation with my addiction. On the farm I have lots of tools and do a lot of repairs and maintenance but I'm really reckless at times and misplace my tools or let them get rusty. My son in law on the other hand babies his tools, cleans them continually and always knows where they are at. I have tried to guard my quit tools with the same care my son in law gives his tools. The quit tools aren't something that you can hold in your hands but they can be kept close at hand and be honed to work well. Occasionally I've come across situations that have required specialty tools to deal with the situation. Some tools may not be used very often but they are in my tool box, clean and ready if they are needed.
The past 100 days have been a struggle for me, I have been trying to advance past the things that I used nicotine to avoid. Through a 12 step addiction recovery program I've learned a great deal about myself that I really haven't wanted to face. One of the more difficult things I've been working on is seeking forgiveness. Like many others I robbed members of my family, that right I actually sole from them. Nicotine took precedence over everything, I'm total embarrassed of how selfish I was for all those decades and so sad that I missed all of those moments of my daughter growing up. Actually I was telling my wife the other day that I don't remember the 80's, 90's and most of 2000's. Why? Nicotine was the only thing I thought of, period! My every moment was concentrated on how I was going to get away to spend time with my mistress. (I'm so glad that bitch is dead.) I'm moving forward ODAAT not just in quitting but in living and working at repairing my past failures by never allowing my priorities to get mixed up.
Thank You to everyone. I'll see you tomorrow!
Oh boy. You've been in my head again. We are so alike.
I feel what you're saying and doing. I'm doing what you're doing.
Some days suck, some days are fantastic. Everyday we are Free men. ODAAT.
I'll take my sucky day over a nic filled day everytime! We've given enough to the poison and her corporate pimps.
It's time for us to live as we are meant. Free. Free to live and love as a father, husband and friend to those who care. Free to love ourselves enough to be quit and pay it forward ODAAT.
Thank you for posting. Quit wood for a week now. Quit with you everyday that ends with a y.
Thanks for posting this Wt. I too have feelings similar to yours about the time away from important things my addiction demanded. I try to focus on the brighter future of being free from nicotine but sometimes it is difficult to forget about the past. The "I wish I had the strength to quit 20 years ago" is on my mind a lot. I wish I knew how to just let it go.
I hope that everyone under the age of 30 will read this, and truly learn the regrets that some of us of a certain age have with our addictions. Quit in your 20's, and stay quit. Great post Wt.
Powerful stuff. Really glad you shared this for all of us to read. It helped my quit today! Thank you!
Quit on!
I really learn a lot from you reflections on your journey. You are moving for healing, recovery-- quit is the first (and essential) step. There's so much more that we can do, and it's good that you share your experience of it. I believe we should strive for real healing to be better men/women, if we can, rather than just maintaining the quit.
-
Another day, a new floor, I need to record for me what my life is like at this milestone.
I have many tools in my tool box that help me stay quit. Different tools are needed for each confrontation with my addiction. On the farm I have lots of tools and do a lot of repairs and maintenance but I'm really reckless at times and misplace my tools or let them get rusty. My son in law on the other hand babies his tools, cleans them continually and always knows where they are at. I have tried to guard my quit tools with the same care my son in law gives his tools. The quit tools aren't something that you can hold in your hands but they can be kept close at hand and be honed to work well. Occasionally I've come across situations that have required specialty tools to deal with the situation. Some tools may not be used very often but they are in my tool box, clean and ready if they are needed.
The past 100 days have been a struggle for me, I have been trying to advance past the things that I used nicotine to avoid. Through a 12 step addiction recovery program I've learned a great deal about myself that I really haven't wanted to face. One of the more difficult things I've been working on is seeking forgiveness. Like many others I robbed members of my family, that right I actually sole from them. Nicotine took precedence over everything, I'm total embarrassed of how selfish I was for all those decades and so sad that I missed all of those moments of my daughter growing up. Actually I was telling my wife the other day that I don't remember the 80's, 90's and most of 2000's. Why? Nicotine was the only thing I thought of, period! My every moment was concentrated on how I was going to get away to spend time with my mistress. (I'm so glad that bitch is dead.) I'm moving forward ODAAT not just in quitting but in living and working at repairing my past failures by never allowing my priorities to get mixed up.
Thank You to everyone. I'll see you tomorrow!
Oh boy. You've been in my head again. We are so alike.
I feel what you're saying and doing. I'm doing what you're doing.
Some days suck, some days are fantastic. Everyday we are Free men. ODAAT.
I'll take my sucky day over a nic filled day everytime! We've given enough to the poison and her corporate pimps.
It's time for us to live as we are meant. Free. Free to live and love as a father, husband and friend to those who care. Free to love ourselves enough to be quit and pay it forward ODAAT.
Thank you for posting. Quit wood for a week now. Quit with you everyday that ends with a y.
Thanks for posting this Wt. I too have feelings similar to yours about the time away from important things my addiction demanded. I try to focus on the brighter future of being free from nicotine but sometimes it is difficult to forget about the past. The "I wish I had the strength to quit 20 years ago" is on my mind a lot. I wish I knew how to just let it go.
I hope that everyone under the age of 30 will read this, and truly learn the regrets that some of us of a certain age have with our addictions. Quit in your 20's, and stay quit. Great post Wt.
Powerful stuff. Really glad you shared this for all of us to read. It helped my quit today! Thank you!
Quit on!
I really learn a lot from you reflections on your journey. You are moving for healing, recovery-- quit is the first (and essential) step. There's so much more that we can do, and it's good that you share your experience of it. I believe we should strive for real healing to be better men/women, if we can, rather than just maintaining the quit.
Great teaching WT. So glad we quit at the same time. What a journey it has been. Not only to quit but to get recovering. Recovery is work! You have a great work ethic. Congrats on 900! I guess we just keep repeating and suit up.
To hell with Niciotine. 'Finger' How about telling USTobacco to go piss up wind!
WADE is sporting a record of 900 wins and zero losses to nicotine using the KTC method! It works every day we apply it.
-
Another day, a new floor, I need to record for me what my life is like at this milestone.
I have many tools in my tool box that help me stay quit. Different tools are needed for each confrontation with my addiction. On the farm I have lots of tools and do a lot of repairs and maintenance but I'm really reckless at times and misplace my tools or let them get rusty. My son in law on the other hand babies his tools, cleans them continually and always knows where they are at. I have tried to guard my quit tools with the same care my son in law gives his tools. The quit tools aren't something that you can hold in your hands but they can be kept close at hand and be honed to work well. Occasionally I've come across situations that have required specialty tools to deal with the situation. Some tools may not be used very often but they are in my tool box, clean and ready if they are needed.
The past 100 days have been a struggle for me, I have been trying to advance past the things that I used nicotine to avoid. Through a 12 step addiction recovery program I've learned a great deal about myself that I really haven't wanted to face. One of the more difficult things I've been working on is seeking forgiveness. Like many others I robbed members of my family, that right I actually sole from them. Nicotine took precedence over everything, I'm total embarrassed of how selfish I was for all those decades and so sad that I missed all of those moments of my daughter growing up. Actually I was telling my wife the other day that I don't remember the 80's, 90's and most of 2000's. Why? Nicotine was the only thing I thought of, period! My every moment was concentrated on how I was going to get away to spend time with my mistress. (I'm so glad that bitch is dead.) I'm moving forward ODAAT not just in quitting but in living and working at repairing my past failures by never allowing my priorities to get mixed up.
Thank You to everyone. I'll see you tomorrow!
Oh boy. You've been in my head again. We are so alike.
I feel what you're saying and doing. I'm doing what you're doing.
Some days suck, some days are fantastic. Everyday we are Free men. ODAAT.
I'll take my sucky day over a nic filled day everytime! We've given enough to the poison and her corporate pimps.
It's time for us to live as we are meant. Free. Free to live and love as a father, husband and friend to those who care. Free to love ourselves enough to be quit and pay it forward ODAAT.
Thank you for posting. Quit wood for a week now. Quit with you everyday that ends with a y.
Thanks for posting this Wt. I too have feelings similar to yours about the time away from important things my addiction demanded. I try to focus on the brighter future of being free from nicotine but sometimes it is difficult to forget about the past. The "I wish I had the strength to quit 20 years ago" is on my mind a lot. I wish I knew how to just let it go.
I hope that everyone under the age of 30 will read this, and truly learn the regrets that some of us of a certain age have with our addictions. Quit in your 20's, and stay quit. Great post Wt.
Powerful stuff. Really glad you shared this for all of us to read. It helped my quit today! Thank you!
Quit on!
I really learn a lot from you reflections on your journey. You are moving for healing, recovery-- quit is the first (and essential) step. There's so much more that we can do, and it's good that you share your experience of it. I believe we should strive for real healing to be better men/women, if we can, rather than just maintaining the quit.
Great teaching WT. So glad we quit at the same time. What a journey it has been. Not only to quit but to get recovering. Recovery is work! You have a great work ethic. Congrats on 900! I guess we just keep repeating and suit up.
To hell with Niciotine. 'Finger' How about telling USTobacco to go piss up wind!
WADE is sporting a record of 900 wins and zero losses to nicotine using the KTC method! It works every day we apply it.
Congrats my brother!!!
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Another day, a new floor, I need to record for me what my life is like at this milestone.
I have many tools in my tool box that help me stay quit. Different tools are needed for each confrontation with my addiction. On the farm I have lots of tools and do a lot of repairs and maintenance but I'm really reckless at times and misplace my tools or let them get rusty. My son in law on the other hand babies his tools, cleans them continually and always knows where they are at. I have tried to guard my quit tools with the same care my son in law gives his tools. The quit tools aren't something that you can hold in your hands but they can be kept close at hand and be honed to work well. Occasionally I've come across situations that have required specialty tools to deal with the situation. Some tools may not be used very often but they are in my tool box, clean and ready if they are needed.
The past 100 days have been a struggle for me, I have been trying to advance past the things that I used nicotine to avoid. Through a 12 step addiction recovery program I've learned a great deal about myself that I really haven't wanted to face. One of the more difficult things I've been working on is seeking forgiveness. Like many others I robbed members of my family, that right I actually sole from them. Nicotine took precedence over everything, I'm total embarrassed of how selfish I was for all those decades and so sad that I missed all of those moments of my daughter growing up. Actually I was telling my wife the other day that I don't remember the 80's, 90's and most of 2000's. Why? Nicotine was the only thing I thought of, period! My every moment was concentrated on how I was going to get away to spend time with my mistress. (I'm so glad that bitch is dead.) I'm moving forward ODAAT not just in quitting but in living and working at repairing my past failures by never allowing my priorities to get mixed up.
Thank You to everyone. I'll see you tomorrow!
Oh boy. You've been in my head again. We are so alike.
I feel what you're saying and doing. I'm doing what you're doing.
Some days suck, some days are fantastic. Everyday we are Free men. ODAAT.
I'll take my sucky day over a nic filled day everytime! We've given enough to the poison and her corporate pimps.
It's time for us to live as we are meant. Free. Free to live and love as a father, husband and friend to those who care. Free to love ourselves enough to be quit and pay it forward ODAAT.
Thank you for posting. Quit wood for a week now. Quit with you everyday that ends with a y.
Thanks for posting this Wt. I too have feelings similar to yours about the time away from important things my addiction demanded. I try to focus on the brighter future of being free from nicotine but sometimes it is difficult to forget about the past. The "I wish I had the strength to quit 20 years ago" is on my mind a lot. I wish I knew how to just let it go.
I hope that everyone under the age of 30 will read this, and truly learn the regrets that some of us of a certain age have with our addictions. Quit in your 20's, and stay quit. Great post Wt.
Powerful stuff. Really glad you shared this for all of us to read. It helped my quit today! Thank you!
Quit on!
I really learn a lot from you reflections on your journey. You are moving for healing, recovery-- quit is the first (and essential) step. There's so much more that we can do, and it's good that you share your experience of it. I believe we should strive for real healing to be better men/women, if we can, rather than just maintaining the quit.
Great teaching WT. So glad we quit at the same time. What a journey it has been. Not only to quit but to get recovering. Recovery is work! You have a great work ethic. Congrats on 900! I guess we just keep repeating and suit up.
To hell with Niciotine. 'Finger' How about telling USTobacco to go piss up wind!
WADE is sporting a record of 900 wins and zero losses to nicotine using the KTC method! It works every day we apply it.
Congrats my brother!!!
Excellent post Wade. As we've discussed before, our paths are scary similar. Mentioning the 80's, and 90's and how they're a blur, is the absolute truth. I sure wish a site like this would've been around back then. Congratulations on the milestone and quit with you EDD.
Old ES
ps - I can hear the train whistle in the distance.
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WT - Meeting last night was what we talked about. Quit and recovery requires forgiveness. We have to forgive others and ourselves. I think addicts are too angry about what they can't control or things that are not worth raising blood pressure over. I was advised that even if it is insincere at first, to pray for people I felt wronged me or that I harbor angry feelings toward. I'm going to put it to the test this week.
They got me at this quote: "Harboring feelings toward someone else is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." Quit with you and working on recovering by understanding how to let go and move forward.
First time that I got on my knees and asked for help and prayed for specific people that I felt wronged me. It felt awkward but funny thing, it wasn't too bad to do it.
Matthew 18:21-35 (I think I understand more today)
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WT - Meeting last night was what we talked about. Quit and recovery requires forgiveness. We have to forgive others and ourselves. I think addicts are too angry about what they can't control or things that are not worth raising blood pressure over. I was advised that even if it is insincere at first, to pray for people I felt wronged me or that I harbor angry feelings toward. I'm going to put it to the test this week.
They got me at this quote: "Harboring feelings toward someone else is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." Quit with you and working on recovering by understanding how to let go and move forward.
First time that I got on my knees and asked for help and prayed for specific people that I felt wronged me. It felt awkward but funny thing, it wasn't too bad to do it.
Matthew 18:21-35 (I think I understand more today)
Thanks Mark that is so timely for me. Our group was on step 8 last week and I also need to do some forgiving before I can move forward and expect those I've harmed to forgive me. I changed my poison but am still poisoning myself hoping they will die. It was prayer that brought me to this forum and it will be through prayer that I will overcome those things that are slowing my recovery. Your comments have energized my desire to move forward from my stagnating recovery.
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Error in thinking; in the early 80's as an addict that had been nicotine free for nearly 3 years I distinctly remember the self justification that brought me back into slavery. Life happened, and with it came daily stress, oh yea an occasional dip would help. I know I can quit anytime, already proved it. I repeated the same error several more times over the next 3 decades.
Lesson learned; that one (or occasion) dip doesn't work. It is a total lie that leads to slavery. Life always throws us curves and its natural to look for shortcuts to overcome and deal with it. Dip isn't a means of dealing with stress, it only adds another problem to life. Face life's challenges head on, accept responsibility and make wise well thought out decisions.
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Error in thinking; in the early 80's as an addict that had been nicotine free for nearly 3 years I distinctly remember the self justification that brought me back into slavery. Life happened, and with it came daily stress, oh yea an occasional dip would help. I know I can quit anytime, already proved it. I repeated the same error several more times over the next 3 decades.
Lesson learned; that one (or occasion) dip doesn't work. It is a total lie that leads to slavery. Life always throws us curves and its natural to look for shortcuts to overcome and deal with it. Dip isn't a means of dealing with stress, it only adds another problem to life. Face life's challenges head on, accept responsibility and make wise well thought out decisions.
#truth
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Posted the same in Diesel's intro...
WT57 - Note of appreciation for continuing to be involved and actively posting to the anxiety depression improvement page. I had no idea how many quitters had issues post quit until I experienced it myself and found this thread. Both you and Diesel have been the leaders giving the rest of us hope that we will get better.
Keep it up bro, you're making lives better!
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Posted the same in Diesel's intro...
WT57 - Note of appreciation for continuing to be involved and actively posting to the anxiety depression improvement page. I had no idea how many quitters had issues post quit until I experienced it myself and found this thread. Both you and Diesel have been the leaders giving the rest of us hope that we will get better.
Keep it up bro, you're making lives better!
I wholeheartedly agree with Done. I do not suffer from anxiety or depression but I feel for you that are dealing with these on top of quitting nicotine. That is difficult enough by itself. Those of you that conquer both are champs in my book. WT and Diesel are tremendous assets for us all. To heal from all our ailments is the endgame of freeing ourselves from the clutches of nicotine.
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Posted the same in Diesel's intro...
WT57 - Note of appreciation for continuing to be involved and actively posting to the anxiety depression improvement page. I had no idea how many quitters had issues post quit until I experienced it myself and found this thread. Both you and Diesel have been the leaders giving the rest of us hope that we will get better.
Keep it up bro, you're making lives better!
I wholeheartedly agree with Done. I do not suffer from anxiety or depression but I feel for you that are dealing with these on top of quitting nicotine. That is difficult enough by itself. Those of you that conquer both are champs in my book. WT and Diesel are tremendous assets for us all. To heal from all our ailments is the endgame of freeing ourselves from the clutches of nicotine.
I truly appreciate the kind words. I'm nothing special nor is my quit but I'm glad my experiences might help others. It just so happens that your thoughts come to me as I'm struggling a little and upon the heals of a vicious dip dream last night. Yesterday was a bitch but I used my tools to quit (I reached out to a quit friend for support). I truly love the brotherhood of this place, even though it reminds me of my dysfunctional family that I'm with this weekend.
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WT the Farmboy is 1,000!
Great journey. Many conversations, many PM's and many days quit with you. Congrats!
Glad to see you still quit and still in the game!
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WT the Farmboy is 1,000!
Great journey. Many conversations, many PM's and many days quit with you. Congrats!
Glad to see you still quit and still in the game!
A great milestone for a great quitter and example for others! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do!
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WT the Farmboy is 1,000!
Great journey. Many conversations, many PM's and many days quit with you. Congrats!
Glad to see you still quit and still in the game!
A great milestone for a great quitter and example for others! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do!
Congrats on the comma WT. Quit with you each and every day.
Old ES
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WT the Farmboy is 1,000!
Great journey. Many conversations, many PM's and many days quit with you. Congrats!
Glad to see you still quit and still in the game!
A great milestone for a great quitter and example for others! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do!
Congrats on the comma WT. Quit with you each and every day.
Old ES
'worship' 'worship' 'worship'
Nice job WT57. Glad you stick around here. When I first quit you were definitely one guy whose words I clung to.
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WT the Farmboy is 1,000!
Great journey. Many conversations, many PM's and many days quit with you. Congrats!
Glad to see you still quit and still in the game!
A great milestone for a great quitter and example for others! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do!
Congrats on the comma WT. Quit with you each and every day.
Old ES
'worship' 'worship' 'worship'
Nice job WT57. Glad you stick around here. When I first quit you were definitely one guy whose words I clung to.
Proud of You! Congratulations on Your Comma! Who woulda thunk? Great job!
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WT the Farmboy is 1,000!
Great journey. Many conversations, many PM's and many days quit with you. Congrats!
Glad to see you still quit and still in the game!
A great milestone for a great quitter and example for others! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do!
Congrats on the comma WT. Quit with you each and every day.
Old ES
'worship' 'worship' 'worship'
Nice job WT57. Glad you stick around here. When I first quit you were definitely one guy whose words I clung to.
Proud of You! Congratulations on Your Comma! Who woulda thunk? Great job!
comma looks good on you!
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WT the Farmboy is 1,000!
Great journey. Many conversations, many PM's and many days quit with you. Congrats!
Glad to see you still quit and still in the game!
A great milestone for a great quitter and example for others! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do!
Congrats on the comma WT. Quit with you each and every day.
Old ES
'worship' 'worship' 'worship'
Nice job WT57. Glad you stick around here. When I first quit you were definitely one guy whose words I clung to.
Proud of You! Congratulations on Your Comma! Who woulda thunk? Great job!
comma looks good on you!
Congrats on the comma WT! Your experiences and stories have strenthened my quit. Thank you Brother.
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WT the Farmboy is 1,000!
Great journey. Many conversations, many PM's and many days quit with you. Congrats!
Glad to see you still quit and still in the game!
A great milestone for a great quitter and example for others! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do!
Congrats on the comma WT. Quit with you each and every day.
Old ES
'worship' 'worship' 'worship'
Nice job WT57. Glad you stick around here. When I first quit you were definitely one guy whose words I clung to.
Proud of You! Congratulations on Your Comma! Who woulda thunk? Great job!
comma looks good on you!
Congrats on the comma WT! Your experiences and stories have strenthened my quit. Thank you Brother.
Well done, sir. A champion of quit
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WT the Farmboy is 1,000!
Great journey. Many conversations, many PM's and many days quit with you. Congrats!
Glad to see you still quit and still in the game!
A great milestone for a great quitter and example for others! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do!
Congrats on the comma WT. Quit with you each and every day.
Old ES
'worship' 'worship' 'worship'
Nice job WT57. Glad you stick around here. When I first quit you were definitely one guy whose words I clung to.
Proud of You! Congratulations on Your Comma! Who woulda thunk? Great job!
comma looks good on you!
Congrats on the comma WT! Your experiences and stories have strenthened my quit. Thank you Brother.
Well done, sir. A champion of quit
Very impressive!!! Quit with your Bad Ass.
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Congratulations on 3 years of freedom. Those newbies that have doubts as to whether or not the fight is worthwhile need only look here. WT57 fought hard for freedom, and it is worth it!
Congratulations on another huge milestone.
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Congratulations on 3 years of freedom. Those newbies that have doubts as to whether or not the fight is worthwhile need only look here. WT57 fought hard for freedom, and it is worth it!
Congratulations on another huge milestone.
Congrats as well. You've battled fiercely and found a better path. And you've shown the rest of us noobs how to get it done. Much respect.
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Congratulations on 3 years of freedom. Those newbies that have doubts as to whether or not the fight is worthwhile need only look here. WT57 fought hard for freedom, and it is worth it!
Congratulations on another huge milestone.
Congrats as well. You've battled fiercely and found a better path. And you've shown the rest of us noobs how to get it done. Much respect.
applause
Pure. Awesome.
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I wanted to bump this post forward today in recognition of my 3 years quit. I'm So glad that I found this site and new friends here. I want to encourage anyone that is new or just investigating the possibility of quitting that you can do it. Quitting is a daily decision and each one of us make it everyday. Heed the warnings in your life! Wade (Wt57)
WARNINGS THAT SHOULD HAVE LEAD EACH OF US TO QUIT DIP!!
I always tried to ignore or pretend I didn't see the warning.
WARNING: This product can cause mouth cancer.
WARNING: This product can cause gum disease and tooth loss.
WARNING: This product is not a safe alternative to cigarettes.
WARNING: Smokeless tobacco is addictive
7 WARNINGS THAT SHOULD HAVE LEAD ME TO QUIT DIP!!
1. In 1983 I watched my grandmother die a dreadful death from CANCER.
2.In 1989 I watched my Sister-in-law get CANCER at the age of 26, she went into remission only to have it return a year later in her brain and she died leaving a 3 yr. old daughter with a father that died 1 yr. later of nicotine addiction related disease.
3.In 1990 I watched my good friend and hunting buddy Roe die of ORAL CANCER from dipping. Read his story in my early intro titled Why Quit April 23 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6243&st=90)
4.In 1995 my younger brother was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma. He survived but the Dr. warned the family of the propensity of CANCER in our family.
5.In 2000 the same brother had a daughter also get stage 4 melanoma. Now the Dr. say that the propensity just greatly increased.
6.Over the past 20 yrs. I have had numerous skin cancers and precancerous spots removed, but ignored the warnings.
7. I've lost about 1/3 of my teeth and had several gum grafts.
It doesn't matter that the reason I quit had nothing to do with these 6 warnings that I was given, what matters is that I quit and that NICOTINE IS NO LONGER A PART OF MY LIFE.
WARNING: To all smokeless tobacco users that may be reading this and not yet quit, QUIT!
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Awesome on your 3 years Quit!
i'd Bump that too man.
Thanks for your support too, for me and more newbies.
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All scary reasons why we all should have quit sooner. Just goes to show you how could ignore all this horrible shit and just keep dipping. We couldn't quit until we were ready. Here's to freedom bro! Congrats on 3 years!
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All scary reasons why we all should have quit sooner. Just goes to show you how could ignore all this horrible shit and just keep dipping. We couldn't quit until we were ready. Here's to freedom bro! Congrats on 3 years!
Yep, what rdad said!!! Funny that I never really saw the warnings on the can. Nor did I really think they applied to me because I was a special butterfly and bulletproof.
I love my teeth, my saliva glands and taste buds. Somehow putting food in a blender so I can drink it is not logical to me all because I thought putting $hit in my lip made me a tough guy.
Thanks WT for your leadership and blatant honesty in the two years I've been here. Congratulations brother!
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I wanted to bump this post forward today in recognition of my 3 years quit. I'm So glad that I found this site and new friends here. I want to encourage anyone that is new or just investigating the possibility of quitting that you can do it. Quitting is a daily decision and each one of us make it everyday. Heed the warnings in your life! Wade (Wt57)WARNINGS THAT SHOULD HAVE LEAD EACH OF US TO QUIT DIP!!
I always tried to ignore or pretend I didn't see the warning.
WARNING: This product can cause mouth cancer.
WARNING: This product can cause gum disease and tooth loss.
WARNING: This product is not a safe alternative to cigarettes.
WARNING: Smokeless tobacco is addictive
7 WARNINGS THAT SHOULD HAVE LEAD ME TO QUIT DIP!!
1. In 1983 I watched my grandmother die a dreadful death from CANCER.
2.In 1989 I watched my Sister-in-law get CANCER at the age of 26, she went into remission only to have it return a year later in her brain and she died leaving a 3 yr. old daughter with a father that died 1 yr. later of nicotine addiction related disease.
3.In 1990 I watched my good friend and hunting buddy Roe die of ORAL CANCER from dipping. Read his story in my early intro titled Why Quit April 23 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6243&st=90)
4.In 1995 my younger brother was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma. He survived but the Dr. warned the family of the propensity of CANCER in our family.
5.In 2000 the same brother had a daughter also get stage 4 melanoma. Now the Dr. say that the propensity just greatly increased.
6.Over the past 20 yrs. I have had numerous skin cancers and precancerous spots removed, but ignored the warnings.
7. I've lost about 1/3 of my teeth and had several gum grafts.
It doesn't matter that the reason I quit had nothing to do with these 6 warnings that I was given, what matters is that I quit and that NICOTINE IS NO LONGER A PART OF MY LIFE.
WARNING: To all smokeless tobacco users that may be reading this and not yet quit, QUIT!
CONGRATS ON 3 YEARS QUIT!
Gotta feel better than shoulder surgery. ?
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Here I am a 3+ years quit nicotine addict and doing good. I'm still an addict and still one dip away from a full blown user. I also am still having issues related to the 4+ decades of heavy nicotine use, this week I had a crown put on a molar and had impressions taken for a partial plate to fill the other missing bottom molars. I only have 6 teeth that haven't been pulled or crowned. The cost of dipping didn't stop with quitting. I'm actually glad that I experienced this recovering process it is teaching me life strengthening skills. Looking back at the past is for the most part a waste of time since it can't be changed. Dwelling on the future is also a waste of time that even at 3 years is difficult to avoid getting caught up in. I'm proud of my quit and so greatful for this forum that was instrumental in helping me quit and stay quit. Today is nearly gone and not only did I stay quit but it was easy. I know that if I have a bad day I can call on one of my fellow quitters to talk me through what haunts me.
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So I got my new teeth last week and it sucks, I feel like both sides of my lower grill full of dip all the time. I'm constantly sucking on my teeth for that juice to spread across my tongue. That feel in my mouth is a bitch of a trigger for a dip.
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So I got my new teeth last week and it sucks, I feel like both sides of my lower grill full of dip all the time. I'm constantly sucking on my teeth for that juice to spread across my tongue. That feel in my mouth is a bitch of a trigger for a dip.
Keep up the quit WT. Your intro and the posts you've made in others' intros remind us of the importance of enduring this battle everyday. I highly doubt that letting cancer swim around on your tongue would be worth the freedom you've ripped away from nicotine the last 3+ years.
Right there with you today, sophos.
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WT, there's wisdom in your posts that is helpful for me.
I used for 20 years. I hope I quit soon enough.
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I think it's time to blow a little dust off this intro. Making the decision to use or not isn't a daily occurrence anymore. Very seldom do I ever actually consider the possibility of a dip. The strongest driving force for me when I think about it anymore is that I think about how depressed I was when I first quit. I don't ever want to return to that awful place I was as a dipper. Quitting definitely sucks bad but being quit is a completely different thing it is glorious. The past two years I have spent a lot of my time learning to live life without my addiction. Has a 58-year-old adult it's hard to imagine that I never learned how to cope with the stresses in life. Using nicotine to mask high stress if you're hiding behind the stressful situations was always part of my prequit life. Learning coping skills at my age has been a challenge but I finally feel that I'm doing a good job.
I love this site my friends here all my quit brothers. I could never done it without you. For any new quitters that doubt their ability to quit I promise you that if you follow the plan and stick with it, stay close to your group and post roll daily you can do it.
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I think it's time to blow a little dust off this intro. Making the decision to use or not isn't a daily occurrence anymore. Very seldom do I ever actually consider the possibility of a dip. The strongest driving force for me when I think about it anymore is that I think about how depressed I was when I first quit. I don't ever want to return to that awful place I was as a dipper. Quitting definitely sucks bad but being quit is a completely different thing it is glorious. The past two years I have spent a lot of my time learning to live life without my addiction. Has a 58-year-old adult it's hard to imagine that I never learned how to cope with the stresses in life. Using nicotine to mask high stress if you're hiding behind the stressful situations was always part of my prequit life. Learning coping skills at my age has been a challenge but I finally feel that I'm doing a good job.
I love this site my friends here all my quit brothers. I could never done it without you. For any new quitters that doubt their ability to quit I promise you that if you follow the plan and stick with it, stay close to your group and post roll daily you can do it.
This is a great update sir.
Today there are some new guys struggling mightily - when the quit begins it is impossible to believe that life can ever be this good.
It can.
It is.
Thanks for the update!
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I think it's time to blow a little dust off this intro. Making the decision to use or not isn't a daily occurrence anymore. Very seldom do I ever actually consider the possibility of a dip. The strongest driving force for me when I think about it anymore is that I think about how depressed I was when I first quit. I don't ever want to return to that awful place I was as a dipper. Quitting definitely sucks bad but being quit is a completely different thing it is glorious. The past two years I have spent a lot of my time learning to live life without my addiction. Has a 58-year-old adult it's hard to imagine that I never learned how to cope with the stresses in life. Using nicotine to mask high stress if you're hiding behind the stressful situations was always part of my prequit life. Learning coping skills at my age has been a challenge but I finally feel that I'm doing a good job.
I love this site my friends here all my quit brothers. I could never done it without you. For any new quitters that doubt their ability to quit I promise you that if you follow the plan and stick with it, stay close to your group and post roll daily you can do it.
This is a great update sir.
Today there are some new guys struggling mightily - when the quit begins it is impossible to believe that life can ever be this good.
It can.
It is.
Thanks for the update!
Thank you my good man. It's taking me a long time to figure out what a normal adult life is suppose to be like ,I started dipping at 12 quit at 50 but my friends it is awesome! I actually helped my daughter decorate her Christmas tree today! Why am I sharing that ? That's first time I've ever helped decorate a tree because I was always enjoying my time alone with my dip missing all that time with my kids because I was a selfish son of a bitch! Thanks ktc! One day at a time! Quit on my brother!
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I think it's time to blow a little dust off this intro. Making the decision to use or not isn't a daily occurrence anymore. Very seldom do I ever actually consider the possibility of a dip. The strongest driving force for me when I think about it anymore is that I think about how depressed I was when I first quit. I don't ever want to return to that awful place I was as a dipper. Quitting definitely sucks bad but being quit is a completely different thing it is glorious. The past two years I have spent a lot of my time learning to live life without my addiction. Has a 58-year-old adult it's hard to imagine that I never learned how to cope with the stresses in life. Using nicotine to mask high stress if you're hiding behind the stressful situations was always part of my prequit life. Learning coping skills at my age has been a challenge but I finally feel that I'm doing a good job.
I love this site my friends here all my quit brothers. I could never done it without you. For any new quitters that doubt their ability to quit I promise you that if you follow the plan and stick with it, stay close to your group and post roll daily you can do it.
This is a great update sir.
Today there are some new guys struggling mightily - when the quit begins it is impossible to believe that life can ever be this good.
It can.
It is.
Thanks for the update!
Thank you my good man. It's taking me a long time to figure out what a normal adult life is suppose to be like ,I started dipping at 12 quit at 50 but my friends it is awesome! I actually helped my daughter decorate her Christmas tree today! Why am I sharing that ? That's first time I've ever helped decorate a tree because I was always enjoying my time alone with my dip missing all that time with my kids because I was a selfish son of a bitch! Thanks ktc! One day at a time! Quit on my brother!
What's up old timer? Lol
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I just found out a friend of mine just diagnosed with stomach cancer. He is on a feeding tube and given less than a year to live. His cancer is definitely caused by DIP! He was a ninja dipper that always swallowed. Damn I hate that shit!! He is my age (late 50's).
ANYONE READING THIS THAT IS STILL USING, STOP!!!
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I just found out a friend of mine just diagnosed with stomach cancer. He is on a feeding tube and given less than a year to live. His cancer is definitely caused by DIP! He was a ninja dipper that always swallowed. Damn I hate that shit!! He is my age (late 50's).
ANYONE READING THIS THAT IS STILL USING, STOP!!!
Sorry to hear wt. Prayers to your friend! Sad. Stay quit
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I just found out a friend of mine just diagnosed with stomach cancer. He is on a feeding tube and given less than a year to live. His cancer is definitely caused by DIP! He was a ninja dipper that always swallowed. Damn I hate that shit!! He is my age (late 50's).
ANYONE READING THIS THAT IS STILL USING, STOP!!!
Sorry to hear wt. Prayers to your friend! Sad. Stay quit
Sorry for you and your buddy and his family as well. I pray that he finds peace somehow and that others reading this story take it to heart. Thanks for the share, it definitely serves as a helpful reminder why we come here everyday.
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I just found out a friend of mine just diagnosed with stomach cancer. He is on a feeding tube and given less than a year to live. His cancer is definitely caused by DIP! He was a ninja dipper that always swallowed. Damn I hate that shit!! He is my age (late 50's).
ANYONE READING THIS THAT IS STILL USING, STOP!!!
Sorry to hear wt. Prayers to your friend! Sad. Stay quit
Sorry for you and your buddy and his family as well. I pray that he finds peace somehow and that others reading this story take it to heart. Thanks for the share, it definitely serves as a helpful reminder why we come here everyday.
In my prayers also.
I quit with you today.
Rawls 383
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I just found out a friend of mine just diagnosed with stomach cancer. He is on a feeding tube and given less than a year to live. His cancer is definitely caused by DIP! He was a ninja dipper that always swallowed. Damn I hate that shit!! He is my age (late 50's).
ANYONE READING THIS THAT IS STILL USING, STOP!!!
Sorry to hear wt. Prayers to your friend! Sad. Stay quit
Sorry for you and your buddy and his family as well. I pray that he finds peace somehow and that others reading this story take it to heart. Thanks for the share, it definitely serves as a helpful reminder why we come here everyday.
In my prayers also.
I quit with you today.
Rawls 383
Damn. So sad. My prayers as well... Quit the poison!
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I just found out a friend of mine just diagnosed with stomach cancer. He is on a feeding tube and given less than a year to live. His cancer is definitely caused by DIP! He was a ninja dipper that always swallowed. Damn I hate that shit!! He is my age (late 50's).
ANYONE READING THIS THAT IS STILL USING, STOP!!!
Sorry to hear wt. Prayers to your friend! Sad. Stay quit
Sorry for you and your buddy and his family as well. I pray that he finds peace somehow and that others reading this story take it to heart. Thanks for the share, it definitely serves as a helpful reminder why we come here everyday.
In my prayers also.
I quit with you today.
Rawls 383
Damn. So sad. My prayers as well... Quit the poison!
DAMN, FUCK CANCER. Prayers brother.
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I just found out a friend of mine just diagnosed with stomach cancer. He is on a feeding tube and given less than a year to live. His cancer is definitely caused by DIP! He was a ninja dipper that always swallowed. Damn I hate that shit!! He is my age (late 50's).
ANYONE READING THIS THAT IS STILL USING, STOP!!!
Sorry to hear wt. Prayers to your friend! Sad. Stay quit
Sorry for you and your buddy and his family as well. I pray that he finds peace somehow and that others reading this story take it to heart. Thanks for the share, it definitely serves as a helpful reminder why we come here everyday.
In my prayers also.
I quit with you today.
Rawls 383
Damn. So sad. My prayers as well... Quit the poison!
DAMN, FUCK CANCER. Prayers brother.
Sorry you have to go through this with yet another friend WT. Thoughts are with you today brother.
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I've mentioned in the past that I have a lot of family that have had cancer. Well just this week I had a malignant melanoma removed from my back. My dermatologist knows my family history and told me we must have a really bad gene and he wants to see me twice a year. Reading through the material he gave me on skin cancer it specifically identifies that shit I put in my mouth for decades as A major cause of SCC the 2nd most common skin cancer. I knew the risk and chose to roll the dice. But once I was addicted the game changed, I lost that freedom to choose or at least the choice became more difficult. Thanks to this site, my brothers of quit and so many of you I'm winning odaat.
Thank you.
WT
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I've mentioned in the past that I have a lot of family that have had cancer. Well just this week I had a malignant melanoma removed from my back. My dermatologist knows my family history and told me we must have a really bad gene and he wants to see me twice a year. Reading through the material he gave me on skin cancer it specifically identifies that shit I put in my mouth for decades as A major cause of SCC the 2nd most common skin cancer. I knew the risk and chose to roll the dice. But once I was addicted the game changed, I lost that freedom to choose or at least the choice became more difficult. Thanks to this site, my brothers of quit and so many of you I'm winning odaat.
Thank you.
WT
Did they get it early WT? I know all about melanoma. It took my Dad away when he was only 48. He didn't get it looked at till it was too late. Very survivable if caught early. Thanks for sharing.
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I've mentioned in the past that I have a lot of family that have had cancer. Well just this week I had a malignant melanoma removed from my back. My dermatologist knows my family history and told me we must have a really bad gene and he wants to see me twice a year. Reading through the material he gave me on skin cancer it specifically identifies that shit I put in my mouth for decades as A major cause of SCC the 2nd most common skin cancer. I knew the risk and chose to roll the dice. But once I was addicted the game changed, I lost that freedom to choose or at least the choice became more difficult. Thanks to this site, my brothers of quit and so many of you I'm winning odaat.
Thank you.
WT
Did they get it early WT? I know all about melanoma. It took my Dad away when he was only 48. He didn't get it looked at till it was too late. Very survivable if caught early. Thanks for sharing.
Hang in there friend, you are on the right path so lets let the angels watch over you through this time and into the future. And remember to live and love life no matter what.
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I've mentioned in the past that I have a lot of family that have had cancer. Well just this week I had a malignant melanoma removed from my back. My dermatologist knows my family history and told me we must have a really bad gene and he wants to see me twice a year. Reading through the material he gave me on skin cancer it specifically identifies that shit I put in my mouth for decades as A major cause of SCC the 2nd most common skin cancer. I knew the risk and chose to roll the dice. But once I was addicted the game changed, I lost that freedom to choose or at least the choice became more difficult. Thanks to this site, my brothers of quit and so many of you I'm winning odaat.
Thank you.
WT
Did they get it early WT? I know all about melanoma. It took my Dad away when he was only 48. He didn't get it looked at till it was too late. Very survivable if caught early. Thanks for sharing.
Hang in there friend, you are on the right path so lets let the angels watch over you through this time and into the future. And remember to live and love life no matter what.
Yes they got it all. Melanoma is deadly but 100% curable if caught early. My brother and his daughter are both miraculous stage 4 melanoma survivors. My dermatologist asks me every time I see him if my brother is still living. He had a radical mastectomy and muscles in his upper back removed. Because of the history I do regular self exams and have been going to my dermatologist regularly. Thank you for the prayers.
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Hi. I'm new here. My name is Harry.
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I've mentioned in the past that I have a lot of family that have had cancer. Well just this week I had a malignant melanoma removed from my back. My dermatologist knows my family history and told me we must have a really bad gene and he wants to see me twice a year. Reading through the material he gave me on skin cancer it specifically identifies that shit I put in my mouth for decades as A major cause of SCC the 2nd most common skin cancer. I knew the risk and chose to roll the dice. But once I was addicted the game changed, I lost that freedom to choose or at least the choice became more difficult. Thanks to this site, my brothers of quit and so many of you I'm winning odaat.
Thank you.
WT
Did they get it early WT? I know all about melanoma. It took my Dad away when he was only 48. He didn't get it looked at till it was too late. Very survivable if caught early. Thanks for sharing.
Hang in there friend, you are on the right path so lets let the angels watch over you through this time and into the future. And remember to live and love life no matter what.
Yes they got it all. Melanoma is deadly but 100% curable if caught early. My brother and his daughter are both miraculous stage 4 melanoma survivors. My dermatologist asks me every time I see him if my brother is still living. He had a radical mastectomy and muscles in his upper back removed. Because of the history I do regular self exams and have been going to my dermatologist regularly. Thank you for the prayers.
Prayers headed your way WT
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I've mentioned in the past that I have a lot of family that have had cancer. Well just this week I had a malignant melanoma removed from my back. My dermatologist knows my family history and told me we must have a really bad gene and he wants to see me twice a year. Reading through the material he gave me on skin cancer it specifically identifies that shit I put in my mouth for decades as A major cause of SCC the 2nd most common skin cancer. I knew the risk and chose to roll the dice. But once I was addicted the game changed, I lost that freedom to choose or at least the choice became more difficult. Thanks to this site, my brothers of quit and so many of you I'm winning odaat.
Thank you.
WT
Did they get it early WT? I know all about melanoma. It took my Dad away when he was only 48. He didn't get it looked at till it was too late. Very survivable if caught early. Thanks for sharing.
Hang in there friend, you are on the right path so lets let the angels watch over you through this time and into the future. And remember to live and love life no matter what.
Yes they got it all. Melanoma is deadly but 100% curable if caught early. My brother and his daughter are both miraculous stage 4 melanoma survivors. My dermatologist asks me every time I see him if my brother is still living. He had a radical mastectomy and muscles in his upper back removed. Because of the history I do regular self exams and have been going to my dermatologist regularly. Thank you for the prayers.
Prayers headed your way WT
Wt do what you do best, get this done! With you my friend, prayers to you and yours!