KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Joemellow on May 30, 2012, 02:40:00 PM
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I am quit. I chewed for about 11 years. The longest quit I had was in boot camp = 2 months but didnt have a choice. other than that = 13 days. Number of attempts = who knows? triple digits I'm sure.
I live in Iowa, work for the Waterloo Fire Dept. 29 years old. I hate that I tell those who I work with that I'm quitting only to have them catch me with chew a week later. Married for 5 years. I hate that i tell my wife I quit only to get caught a week later. I have a huge family. Same story.
I have goals. Lofty ones. I work for them every day. I want to climb El Capitan. I want to complete an Iron Man. I want the wrestling team I coach to have more State Titles than any team in Iowa. These are great goals that keep me moving, but they are not the most important. MOST IMPORTANLY is my goal to quit the nic.
Along with this goal is quitting caffeine and anything else that ends in -ine. This includes methemphetamine. But since I've never seen it and have no idea where to buy it I dont think this will be a problem.
Day 1 - I am quit.
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Congrats on the next chapter of your life, it will get better, I promise.
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I am quit. I chewed for about 11 years. The longest quit I had was in boot camp = 2 months but didnt have a choice. other than that = 13 days. Number of attempts = who knows? triple digits I'm sure.
I live in Iowa, work for the Waterloo Fire Dept. 29 years old. I hate that I tell those who I work with that I'm quitting only to have them catch me with chew a week later. Married for 5 years. I hate that i tell my wife I quit only to get caught a week later. I have a huge family. Same story.
I have goals. Lofty ones. I work for them every day. I want to climb El Capitan. I want to complete an Iron Man. I want the wrestling team I coach to have more State Titles than any team in Iowa. These are great goals that keep me moving, but they are not the most important. MOST IMPORTANLY is my goal to quit the nic.
Along with this goal is quitting caffeine and anything else that ends in -ine. This includes methemphetamine. But since I've never seen it and have no idea where to buy it I dont think this will be a problem.
Day 1 - I am quit.
Congrats on the best decision you have ever made. It's not going to be easy, but it will be worth it. I am on day 4 of my quit. As they say around here, Embrace the Suck, becuase it's coming. Feel free to pm anytime if you need help or just want to chat.
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Great choice to be here and this will be the toughest mountain to climb so far!
I will say you have the right outlook to quit but I do fear that your going to try to quit nic and caffeine at the same time may not have the desired effect......
Stick to quiting the nic and then once you get some good quit strength built up and the craving have subsided a little then I would say quit the caffeine.
Either way brother I would like to say I am quit with you and also if you need some help with any of this PM me and I will help you!
Now make sure to read thru the welcome center information and I would also recomend reading as much information on this site as you can, when you can!
Stay Strong, Focused and Quit!
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I am quit. I chewed for about 11 years. The longest quit I had was in boot camp = 2 months but didnt have a choice. other than that = 13 days. Number of attempts = who knows? triple digits I'm sure.
I live in Iowa, work for the Waterloo Fire Dept. 29 years old. I hate that I tell those who I work with that I'm quitting only to have them catch me with chew a week later. Married for 5 years. I hate that i tell my wife I quit only to get caught a week later. I have a huge family. Same story.
I have goals. Lofty ones. I work for them every day. I want to climb El Capitan. I want to complete an Iron Man. I want the wrestling team I coach to have more State Titles than any team in Iowa. These are great goals that keep me moving, but they are not the most important. MOST IMPORTANLY is my goal to quit the nic.
Along with this goal is quitting caffeine and anything else that ends in -ine. This includes methemphetamine. But since I've never seen it and have no idea where to buy it I dont think this will be a problem.
Day 1 - I am quit.
Great intro man. Good to have you. Get to know your September Quit brothers, they may save your life one day.. Great choice to live nic free
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I am quit. I chewed for about 11 years. The longest quit I had was in boot camp = 2 months but didnt have a choice. other than that = 13 days. Number of attempts = who knows? triple digits I'm sure.
I live in Iowa, work for the Waterloo Fire Dept. 29 years old. I hate that I tell those who I work with that I'm quitting only to have them catch me with chew a week later. Married for 5 years. I hate that i tell my wife I quit only to get caught a week later. I have a huge family. Same story.
I have goals. Lofty ones. I work for them every day. I want to climb El Capitan. I want to complete an Iron Man. I want the wrestling team I coach to have more State Titles than any team in Iowa. These are great goals that keep me moving, but they are not the most important. MOST IMPORTANLY is my goal to quit the nic.
Along with this goal is quitting caffeine and anything else that ends in -ine. This includes methemphetamine. But since I've never seen it and have no idea where to buy it I dont think this will be a problem.
Day 1 - I am quit.
Great intro man. Good to have you. Get to know your September Quit brothers, they may save your life one day.. Great choice to live nic free
Welcome to the site. Everyday for me is like a new match. Using the KTC program, I am undefeated with my quit. 78 - 0 !
It feels good to be quit. Don't worry about your match tomorrow, only focus on today. It is a crazy journey but well worth being free. Each match you win and each day that goes by, you are more resolved to keep winning.
It is painful at times but the victories are sweet!
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I am quit. I chewed for about 11 years. The longest quit I had was in boot camp = 2 months but didnt have a choice. other than that = 13 days. Number of attempts = who knows? triple digits I'm sure.
I live in Iowa, work for the Waterloo Fire Dept. 29 years old. I hate that I tell those who I work with that I'm quitting only to have them catch me with chew a week later. Married for 5 years. I hate that i tell my wife I quit only to get caught a week later. I have a huge family. Same story.
I have goals. Lofty ones. I work for them every day. I want to climb El Capitan. I want to complete an Iron Man. I want the wrestling team I coach to have more State Titles than any team in Iowa. These are great goals that keep me moving, but they are not the most important. MOST IMPORTANLY is my goal to quit the nic.
Along with this goal is quitting caffeine and anything else that ends in -ine. This includes methemphetamine. But since I've never seen it and have no idea where to buy it I dont think this will be a problem.
Day 1 - I am quit.
Great intro man. Good to have you. Get to know your September Quit brothers, they may save your life one day.. Great choice to live nic free
Welcome to the site. Everyday for me is like a new match. Using the KTC program, I am undefeated with my quit. 78 - 0 !
It feels good to be quit. Don't worry about your match tomorrow, only focus on today. It is a crazy journey but well worth being free. Each match you win and each day that goes by, you are more resolved to keep winning.
It is painful at times but the victories are sweet!
I second all of that! I'm also undefeated 60 - 0. Thought today would be a challenge but it turned into a huge victory for me. One step closer to a state title with you!
'tough'
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We roll out of Ohio and head over to pick up our next quitter in Gilbertville, Iowa, Joemellow. He is married with two little ones, 2 years and 11 months. Joe started dipping at 20 years old and he is a Firefighter/Paramedic. He plans to celebrate his 100 days with a steak and some Amber Bock. Joe enjoys lots of outdoor activities including Triathlons, rock climbing, snowboarding and yard work. Joe will be signing up 200 days and says "When staying quit seems too hard, just remember that someone out there is suffering through a more intense crave than you and he is still quit." When asked who inspired and helped him he said "There's been plenty of people help me along the way. Just a few would be Hjhlrool, dabean, suds, Scowick, Jhaenel, Detpack. They've all helped in some way."
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Nice job brudda!
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I like your style and quit with you today. Your Avatar kicks ass. My son just joined USA wrestling and made varsity his freshman year.
Congrats on making it to the HOF today. That is huge in your victory over vice!
You can only quit because you want to and you have demonstrated that YOU want to. Your wrestling team should be a motivator. I am sure those kids look at their coach and want to be like him. If they see a dip in your mouth, you are UST greatest sponsor! They don't even pay you, you pay them, and the kids that look up to you pay the price.
I hope that isn't too much of a lecture. I just love and respect my son's coach because he is a great example to my son. I am sure parents of your kids feel the same and appreciate you and quitting is another reason why they would have mad respect for you.
Quit on.
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We roll out of Ohio and head over to pick up our next quitter in Gilbertville, Iowa, Joemellow. He is married with two little ones, 2 years and 11 months. Joe started dipping at 20 years old and he is a Firefighter/Paramedic. He plans to celebrate his 100 days with a steak and some Amber Bock. Joe enjoys lots of outdoor activities including Triathlons, rock climbing, snowboarding and yard work. Joe will be signing up 200 days and says "When staying quit seems too hard, just remember that someone out there is suffering through a more intense crave than you and he is still quit." When asked who inspired and helped him he said "There's been plenty of people help me along the way. Just a few would be Hjhlrool, dabean, suds, Scowick, Jhaenel, Detpack. They've all helped in some way."
Joe, I'm happy to have you in my group and I'm proud that you made it as a 100% poster. Way to lead by example. Thanks for being there for me.
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I caved.
I was worried about this vacation to Tennessee. A 13 hour drive was far longer than I have had to deal with so far. Before I left I got on the site and read up so I could build a solid defense. Turns out I had no trouble at all driving all the way to Chattanooga. I felt as though I had just cleared another hurdle and I was confident in my quit. Two days later (today) me and Mrs Mellow drove to Nashville for the next part of our trip. We arrived, walked around a bit, and then I got a call from home.
My brother called to inform me that Dad wasn't feeling well and was taken to the hospital. It was discovered that he has a brain tumor. Completely blindsided with the worst news I have ever heard, I could only do one thing, start driving home.
After a couple hours I decided that if I was going to make it home I would need chew. I bought some and it sat in my lap for 100 miles or so. My concern for that dip or lack of it paled in comparison for my concern for my father. Somewhere in southern Illinios I open it and put it in. I felt guilt and shame, but these emotions weren't, and still aren't much compared to the worry I have for the old man right now.
It didn't taste like I remembered. I didn't really like it, actually. For 5 minutes I didn't feel anything. Then in a sudden wave I felt sick. Hot flashes, upset stomach, dizziness. Then I started having an anxiety attack. I had a small anxiety attack once. It was nothing like this. I drove a few more miles and stopped on the off ramp. The wife asked if I was Ok, I said no. She was worried. We got out and as I tried to catch my breath I told her what happened.
In chat people talk about closing the door. How was that possible? I didn't see a way that I would ever have a strong enough quit to "close the door". I always felt like I was 10 minutes away from caving. I told my wife about this and informed her that I, too, just closed the door there on some off ramp in Illinois. My tin is still sitting there.
We started driving about 10 minutes later and I'm just now feeling better. She asked me how I felt. Well, there's a loaded question. I'm worried sick about my Dad and our family right now. I feel guilt and shame because I posted 113 this morning and didn't keep my word. But what I told her was "relief". I'm not worried about another cave anymore. She understood and I hope you do as well. Never again for any reason.
I want to be a part of this site. I want to be quit with everyone here and I want to help others in their struggle as well. I understand that you would question my word after what happened, but there is no need to question my respect for KTC and my desire to be a part of it.
Please say a prayer for my father. He is an amazing man. He will be very happy to hear what happened tonight.
This is me closing the door. Never again for any reason
I am sorry for your father and I will keep him in my prayers. However, I have seen many others here face issues that hit them just as hard. Did you not learn anything in your time here? 1) Who did you call or text before slowly killing yourself on your drive to see your sick father? 2) You posted roll, why not just honor your word and wait until tomorrow? You just threw away a lot, get over to Feb and post your day 1.
'bang head'
Is anyone concerned about this? Joe, did your dad's tumor go away when you lied to us and poisoned yourself with a big fatty on the ride home? Does integrity and honor mean nothing to you, to any of you? Closed the door my ass, you've wedged a cast iron anvil under it.
I am sorry to hear about your father.
So, this is what I see-
You got some terrible news. You are only 113 days out and still have urges. This news allowed you to justify to yourself that you could have a dip. I mean, why not, how else would anyone deal with this kind of news? This is why we get connected on this site- we text we call we do whatever is necessary to keep our quit.
The entire time you were driving you were justifying stopping at the store and making that purchase. It was all you were focused on- not your father-not your wife- just a can of chew. I know this because I am an ADDICT TOO and I have been there too. Guess what I did?? I took the time to talk to my wife about it- my biggest quit fan- and I posted roll so there was no stopping for that day.
I hope that you can close that door- but until you learn how to reach out for help when you are weak you will always find a way to talk yourself into some nicotine- until then all you can rely on is hope...
-
I caved.
I was worried about this vacation to Tennessee. A 13 hour drive was far longer than I have had to deal with so far. Before I left I got on the site and read up so I could build a solid defense. Turns out I had no trouble at all driving all the way to Chattanooga. I felt as though I had just cleared another hurdle and I was confident in my quit. Two days later (today) me and Mrs Mellow drove to Nashville for the next part of our trip. We arrived, walked around a bit, and then I got a call from home.
My brother called to inform me that Dad wasn't feeling well and was taken to the hospital. It was discovered that he has a brain tumor. Completely blindsided with the worst news I have ever heard, I could only do one thing, start driving home.
After a couple hours I decided that if I was going to make it home I would need chew. I bought some and it sat in my lap for 100 miles or so. My concern for that dip or lack of it paled in comparison for my concern for my father. Somewhere in southern Illinios I open it and put it in. I felt guilt and shame, but these emotions weren't, and still aren't much compared to the worry I have for the old man right now.
It didn't taste like I remembered. I didn't really like it, actually. For 5 minutes I didn't feel anything. Then in a sudden wave I felt sick. Hot flashes, upset stomach, dizziness. Then I started having an anxiety attack. I had a small anxiety attack once. It was nothing like this. I drove a few more miles and stopped on the off ramp. The wife asked if I was Ok, I said no. She was worried. We got out and as I tried to catch my breath I told her what happened.
In chat people talk about closing the door. How was that possible? I didn't see a way that I would ever have a strong enough quit to "close the door". I always felt like I was 10 minutes away from caving. I told my wife about this and informed her that I, too, just closed the door there on some off ramp in Illinois. My tin is still sitting there.
We started driving about 10 minutes later and I'm just now feeling better. She asked me how I felt. Well, there's a loaded question. I'm worried sick about my Dad and our family right now. I feel guilt and shame because I posted 113 this morning and didn't keep my word. But what I told her was "relief". I'm not worried about another cave anymore. She understood and I hope you do as well. Never again for any reason.
I want to be a part of this site. I want to be quit with everyone here and I want to help others in their struggle as well. I understand that you would question my word after what happened, but there is no need to question my respect for KTC and my desire to be a part of it.
Please say a prayer for my father. He is an amazing man. He will be very happy to hear what happened tonight.
This is me closing the door. Never again for any reason
I am sorry for your father and I will keep him in my prayers. However, I have seen many others here face issues that hit them just as hard. Did you not learn anything in your time here? 1) Who did you call or text before slowly killing yourself on your drive to see your sick father? 2) You posted roll, why not just honor your word and wait until tomorrow? You just threw away a lot, get over to Feb and post your day 1.
'bang head'
Is anyone concerned about this? Joe, did your dad's tumor go away when you lied to us and poisoned yourself with a big fatty on the ride home? Does integrity and honor mean nothing to you, to any of you? Closed the door my ass, you've wedged a cast iron anvil under it.
I am sorry to hear about your father.
So, this is what I see-
You got some terrible news. You are only 113 days out and still have urges. This news allowed you to justify to yourself that you could have a dip. I mean, why not, how else would anyone deal with this kind of news? This is why we get connected on this site- we text we call we do whatever is necessary to keep our quit.
The entire time you were driving you were justifying stopping at the store and making that purchase. It was all you were focused on- not your father-not your wife- just a can of chew. I know this because I am an ADDICT TOO and I have been there too. Guess what I did?? I took the time to talk to my wife about it- my biggest quit fan- and I posted roll so there was no stopping for that day.
I hope that you can close that door- but until you learn how to reach out for help when you are weak you will always find a way to talk yourself into some nicotine- until then all you can rely on is hope...
The post-HOF is a bad one, and it gets many a stopper.
As my friend J2B said years ago, "Quitters find a way to quit.".
I pray for your family, but that does not excuse your decision. (My other friend Sco says) "One problem + nicotine = 2 problems". You can't grow by taking a piece of you (your quit) away.
Nicotine is never, ever the answer. If you think it is, it is a lie.
You can do this.
(1) What happened?
(2) Why did it happen?
(3) What are you doing differently this time?
-
I caved.
I was worried about this vacation to Tennessee. A 13 hour drive was far longer than I have had to deal with so far. Before I left I got on the site and read up so I could build a solid defense. Turns out I had no trouble at all driving all the way to Chattanooga. I felt as though I had just cleared another hurdle and I was confident in my quit. Two days later (today) me and Mrs Mellow drove to Nashville for the next part of our trip. We arrived, walked around a bit, and then I got a call from home.
My brother called to inform me that Dad wasn't feeling well and was taken to the hospital. It was discovered that he has a brain tumor. Completely blindsided with the worst news I have ever heard, I could only do one thing, start driving home.
After a couple hours I decided that if I was going to make it home I would need chew. I bought some and it sat in my lap for 100 miles or so. My concern for that dip or lack of it paled in comparison for my concern for my father. Somewhere in southern Illinios I open it and put it in. I felt guilt and shame, but these emotions weren't, and still aren't much compared to the worry I have for the old man right now.
It didn't taste like I remembered. I didn't really like it, actually. For 5 minutes I didn't feel anything. Then in a sudden wave I felt sick. Hot flashes, upset stomach, dizziness. Then I started having an anxiety attack. I had a small anxiety attack once. It was nothing like this. I drove a few more miles and stopped on the off ramp. The wife asked if I was Ok, I said no. She was worried. We got out and as I tried to catch my breath I told her what happened.
In chat people talk about closing the door. How was that possible? I didn't see a way that I would ever have a strong enough quit to "close the door". I always felt like I was 10 minutes away from caving. I told my wife about this and informed her that I, too, just closed the door there on some off ramp in Illinois. My tin is still sitting there.
We started driving about 10 minutes later and I'm just now feeling better. She asked me how I felt. Well, there's a loaded question. I'm worried sick about my Dad and our family right now. I feel guilt and shame because I posted 113 this morning and didn't keep my word. But what I told her was "relief". I'm not worried about another cave anymore. She understood and I hope you do as well. Never again for any reason.
I want to be a part of this site. I want to be quit with everyone here and I want to help others in their struggle as well. I understand that you would question my word after what happened, but there is no need to question my respect for KTC and my desire to be a part of it.
Please say a prayer for my father. He is an amazing man. He will be very happy to hear what happened tonight.
This is me closing the door. Never again for any reason
I am sorry for your father and I will keep him in my prayers. However, I have seen many others here face issues that hit them just as hard. Did you not learn anything in your time here? 1) Who did you call or text before slowly killing yourself on your drive to see your sick father? 2) You posted roll, why not just honor your word and wait until tomorrow? You just threw away a lot, get over to Feb and post your day 1.
'bang head'
Is anyone concerned about this? Joe, did your dad's tumor go away when you lied to us and poisoned yourself with a big fatty on the ride home? Does integrity and honor mean nothing to you, to any of you? Closed the door my ass, you've wedged a cast iron anvil under it.
I am sorry to hear about your father.
So, this is what I see-
You got some terrible news. You are only 113 days out and still have urges. This news allowed you to justify to yourself that you could have a dip. I mean, why not, how else would anyone deal with this kind of news? This is why we get connected on this site- we text we call we do whatever is necessary to keep our quit.
The entire time you were driving you were justifying stopping at the store and making that purchase. It was all you were focused on- not your father-not your wife- just a can of chew. I know this because I am an ADDICT TOO and I have been there too. Guess what I did?? I took the time to talk to my wife about it- my biggest quit fan- and I posted roll so there was no stopping for that day.
I hope that you can close that door- but until you learn how to reach out for help when you are weak you will always find a way to talk yourself into some nicotine- until then all you can rely on is hope...
The post-HOF is a bad one, and it gets many a stopper.
As my friend J2B said years ago, "Quitters find a way to quit.".
I pray for your family, but that does not excuse your decision. (My other friend Sco says) "One problem + nicotine = 2 problems". You can't grow by taking a piece of you (your quit) away.
Nicotine is never, ever the answer. If you think it is, it is a lie.
You can do this.
(1) What happened?
(2) Why did it happen?
(3) What are you doing differently this time?
I remember writing to you the last time you caved that you needed to be so invloved with the site that your cave would be epic if you caved again.
1 problem + nicotine = 2 problems.
Nothing illistrates this equation more than this cave. Errrr.
-
I caved.
I was worried about this vacation to Tennessee. A 13 hour drive was far longer than I have had to deal with so far. Before I left I got on the site and read up so I could build a solid defense. Turns out I had no trouble at all driving all the way to Chattanooga. I felt as though I had just cleared another hurdle and I was confident in my quit. Two days later (today) me and Mrs Mellow drove to Nashville for the next part of our trip. We arrived, walked around a bit, and then I got a call from home.
My brother called to inform me that Dad wasn't feeling well and was taken to the hospital. It was discovered that he has a brain tumor. Completely blindsided with the worst news I have ever heard, I could only do one thing, start driving home.
After a couple hours I decided that if I was going to make it home I would need chew. I bought some and it sat in my lap for 100 miles or so. My concern for that dip or lack of it paled in comparison for my concern for my father. Somewhere in southern Illinios I open it and put it in. I felt guilt and shame, but these emotions weren't, and still aren't much compared to the worry I have for the old man right now.
It didn't taste like I remembered. I didn't really like it, actually. For 5 minutes I didn't feel anything. Then in a sudden wave I felt sick. Hot flashes, upset stomach, dizziness. Then I started having an anxiety attack. I had a small anxiety attack once. It was nothing like this. I drove a few more miles and stopped on the off ramp. The wife asked if I was Ok, I said no. She was worried. We got out and as I tried to catch my breath I told her what happened.
In chat people talk about closing the door. How was that possible? I didn't see a way that I would ever have a strong enough quit to "close the door". I always felt like I was 10 minutes away from caving. I told my wife about this and informed her that I, too, just closed the door there on some off ramp in Illinois. My tin is still sitting there.
We started driving about 10 minutes later and I'm just now feeling better. She asked me how I felt. Well, there's a loaded question. I'm worried sick about my Dad and our family right now. I feel guilt and shame because I posted 113 this morning and didn't keep my word. But what I told her was "relief". I'm not worried about another cave anymore. She understood and I hope you do as well. Never again for any reason.
I want to be a part of this site. I want to be quit with everyone here and I want to help others in their struggle as well. I understand that you would question my word after what happened, but there is no need to question my respect for KTC and my desire to be a part of it.
Please say a prayer for my father. He is an amazing man. He will be very happy to hear what happened tonight.
This is me closing the door. Never again for any reason
I am sorry for your father and I will keep him in my prayers. However, I have seen many others here face issues that hit them just as hard. Did you not learn anything in your time here? 1) Who did you call or text before slowly killing yourself on your drive to see your sick father? 2) You posted roll, why not just honor your word and wait until tomorrow? You just threw away a lot, get over to Feb and post your day 1.
'bang head'
Is anyone concerned about this? Joe, did your dad's tumor go away when you lied to us and poisoned yourself with a big fatty on the ride home? Does integrity and honor mean nothing to you, to any of you? Closed the door my ass, you've wedged a cast iron anvil under it.
I am sorry to hear about your father.
So, this is what I see-
You got some terrible news. You are only 113 days out and still have urges. This news allowed you to justify to yourself that you could have a dip. I mean, why not, how else would anyone deal with this kind of news? This is why we get connected on this site- we text we call we do whatever is necessary to keep our quit.
The entire time you were driving you were justifying stopping at the store and making that purchase. It was all you were focused on- not your father-not your wife- just a can of chew. I know this because I am an ADDICT TOO and I have been there too. Guess what I did?? I took the time to talk to my wife about it- my biggest quit fan- and I posted roll so there was no stopping for that day.
I hope that you can close that door- but until you learn how to reach out for help when you are weak you will always find a way to talk yourself into some nicotine- until then all you can rely on is hope...
The post-HOF is a bad one, and it gets many a stopper.
As my friend J2B said years ago, "Quitters find a way to quit.".
I pray for your family, but that does not excuse your decision. (My other friend Sco says) "One problem + nicotine = 2 problems". You can't grow by taking a piece of you (your quit) away.
Nicotine is never, ever the answer. If you think it is, it is a lie.
You can do this.
(1) What happened?
(2) Why did it happen?
(3) What are you doing differently this time?
I remember writing to you the last time you caved that you needed to be so invloved with the site that your cave would be epic if you caved again.
1 problem + nicotine = 2 problems.
Nothing illistrates this equation more than this cave. Errrr.
First I am very sorry to hear about your father. I have to ask explain to me where this can of death fit into the equation to make anything better? I get it if say for some reason by you dipping your dad would be able to walk out of the hospital but that is just not the case.
You better have grabbed onto the subtle messages that have been placed in your thread.
-WP used the word tripped up many a STOPPER n ScoDaddys formula.
-Dougie left the word HOPE. We know what hope buys you here on KTC.
-Sco Daddy left you his formula again and involvement.
You didn't burn the bridge and the piers when you left the bitch you left a glimmer for her (the NIC Bitch incase you don't know who I am referring to) to come get her slave.
This is what should happen for you in the future: You should have KTC on speed dial which means when you think a dip is going to solve all life's problems you reach out AKA pulling the trigger... did you call or text one brother/sister from the site? I saw no mention of it in your story. I know if I drove with a can on my lap for a 100 miles I would be spending the rest of the day trying to get it removed from my ass. I have INVOLVED (oh wait there is that word again) my girl in my quit and if she saw a can in my possession she would be there.
Aside from that if I for one minute ever thought that there was an error in Scodaddys formula the next step is reach to your phone that you have prepopulated with you quit brothers/sisters numbers and call text what have you. And if your phone is dead you have a few numbers in your wife's fone. JIC
Does this seem extreme? I say no its not, you want to live?
Now to illustrate Sco's formula one more time for the slow people in the crowd.
Here you are your dad still has a health issue. problem 1
you have admitted to a cave. problem 1
=2 problems accept you have added the second problem so instead of focusing ALL of your efforts on your father you are now fighting two battles.
You don't know me I don't know you but if you need a number PM me and my number is yours.
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I caved.
I was worried about this vacation to Tennessee. A 13 hour drive was far longer than I have had to deal with so far. Before I left I got on the site and read up so I could build a solid defense. Turns out I had no trouble at all driving all the way to Chattanooga. I felt as though I had just cleared another hurdle and I was confident in my quit. Two days later (today) me and Mrs Mellow drove to Nashville for the next part of our trip. We arrived, walked around a bit, and then I got a call from home.
My brother called to inform me that Dad wasn't feeling well and was taken to the hospital. It was discovered that he has a brain tumor. Completely blindsided with the worst news I have ever heard, I could only do one thing, start driving home.
After a couple hours I decided that if I was going to make it home I would need chew. I bought some and it sat in my lap for 100 miles or so. My concern for that dip or lack of it paled in comparison for my concern for my father. Somewhere in southern Illinios I open it and put it in. I felt guilt and shame, but these emotions weren't, and still aren't much compared to the worry I have for the old man right now.
It didn't taste like I remembered. I didn't really like it, actually. For 5 minutes I didn't feel anything. Then in a sudden wave I felt sick. Hot flashes, upset stomach, dizziness. Then I started having an anxiety attack. I had a small anxiety attack once. It was nothing like this. I drove a few more miles and stopped on the off ramp. The wife asked if I was Ok, I said no. She was worried. We got out and as I tried to catch my breath I told her what happened.
In chat people talk about closing the door. How was that possible? I didn't see a way that I would ever have a strong enough quit to "close the door". I always felt like I was 10 minutes away from caving. I told my wife about this and informed her that I, too, just closed the door there on some off ramp in Illinois. My tin is still sitting there.
We started driving about 10 minutes later and I'm just now feeling better. She asked me how I felt. Well, there's a loaded question. I'm worried sick about my Dad and our family right now. I feel guilt and shame because I posted 113 this morning and didn't keep my word. But what I told her was "relief". I'm not worried about another cave anymore. She understood and I hope you do as well. Never again for any reason.
I want to be a part of this site. I want to be quit with everyone here and I want to help others in their struggle as well. I understand that you would question my word after what happened, but there is no need to question my respect for KTC and my desire to be a part of it.
Please say a prayer for my father. He is an amazing man. He will be very happy to hear what happened tonight.
This is me closing the door. Never again for any reason
I am sorry for your father and I will keep him in my prayers. However, I have seen many others here face issues that hit them just as hard. Did you not learn anything in your time here? 1) Who did you call or text before slowly killing yourself on your drive to see your sick father? 2) You posted roll, why not just honor your word and wait until tomorrow? You just threw away a lot, get over to Feb and post your day 1.
'bang head'
Is anyone concerned about this? Joe, did your dad's tumor go away when you lied to us and poisoned yourself with a big fatty on the ride home? Does integrity and honor mean nothing to you, to any of you? Closed the door my ass, you've wedged a cast iron anvil under it.
I am sorry to hear about your father.
So, this is what I see-
You got some terrible news. You are only 113 days out and still have urges. This news allowed you to justify to yourself that you could have a dip. I mean, why not, how else would anyone deal with this kind of news? This is why we get connected on this site- we text we call we do whatever is necessary to keep our quit.
The entire time you were driving you were justifying stopping at the store and making that purchase. It was all you were focused on- not your father-not your wife- just a can of chew. I know this because I am an ADDICT TOO and I have been there too. Guess what I did?? I took the time to talk to my wife about it- my biggest quit fan- and I posted roll so there was no stopping for that day.
I hope that you can close that door- but until you learn how to reach out for help when you are weak you will always find a way to talk yourself into some nicotine- until then all you can rely on is hope...
The post-HOF is a bad one, and it gets many a stopper.
As my friend J2B said years ago, "Quitters find a way to quit.".
I pray for your family, but that does not excuse your decision. (My other friend Sco says) "One problem + nicotine = 2 problems". You can't grow by taking a piece of you (your quit) away.
Nicotine is never, ever the answer. If you think it is, it is a lie.
You can do this.
(1) What happened?
(2) Why did it happen?
(3) What are you doing differently this time?
I remember writing to you the last time you caved that you needed to be so invloved with the site that your cave would be epic if you caved again.
1 problem + nicotine = 2 problems.
Nothing illistrates this equation more than this cave. Errrr.
First I am very sorry to hear about your father. I have to ask explain to me where this can of death fit into the equation to make anything better? I get it if say for some reason by you dipping your dad would be able to walk out of the hospital but that is just not the case.
You better have grabbed onto the subtle messages that have been placed in your thread.
-WP used the word tripped up many a STOPPER n ScoDaddys formula.
-Dougie left the word HOPE. We know what hope buys you here on KTC.
-Sco Daddy left you his formula again and involvement.
You didn't burn the bridge and the piers when you left the bitch you left a glimmer for her (the NIC Bitch incase you don't know who I am referring to) to come get her slave.
This is what should happen for you in the future: You should have KTC on speed dial which means when you think a dip is going to solve all life's problems you reach out AKA pulling the trigger... did you call or text one brother/sister from the site? I saw no mention of it in your story. I know if I drove with a can on my lap for a 100 miles I would be spending the rest of the day trying to get it removed from my ass. I have INVOLVED (oh wait there is that word again) my girl in my quit and if she saw a can in my possession she would be there.
Aside from that if I for one minute ever thought that there was an error in Scodaddys formula the next step is reach to your phone that you have prepopulated with you quit brothers/sisters numbers and call text what have you. And if your phone is dead you have a few numbers in your wife's fone. JIC
Does this seem extreme? I say no its not, you want to live?
Now to illustrate Sco's formula one more time for the slow people in the crowd.
Here you are your dad still has a health issue. problem 1
you have admitted to a cave. problem 1
=2 problems accept you have added the second problem so instead of focusing ALL of your efforts on your father you are now fighting two battles.
You don't know me I don't know you but if you need a number PM me and my number is yours.
JoeMellow:
I am heartbroken. Never met you but your Avatar. USA Wrestling. WE are lovers of the sport and we are addicts. We have so much in common. It breaks me a little because I related to you.
I admired you and any quitter that makes it to the Hall is my hero.
Tough weekend. However, your dad was the validation but you didn't recognize the post hall of fame funk.
Still need to post every day and keep your word. I am so sorry about your dad. I don't know if it is better to have time to prepare for a dad's passing or be surprised by it.
6/6/6 At 8:30 in the morning, I got the call that my dad was killed in a roll over accident. My uncle was the driver and my dad was ejected after his head was crushed. It look like it was a terrible tragedy but my uncle was under the influence of alcohol.
With all that, I tried to be friends with alcohol. 13 days ago, I closed the door because some people can be friends with alcohol but I am not wired to get along with alcohol either.
I share this because I want you to know I feel the pains of what it must be like in that moment. You just wanted to get a little numb because the news is hard.
I also want you to deal with life on lifes terms! Freedom from vice isn't all sunshine. You will have to deal with some real shit and the nic bitch seduced you in a time that is just unbelievably selfish of her!
She is not your friend. She doesn't sympathize, empathize or care. Your brothers care and you could have called us and we could be on that drive with you and sit with you while you process. We are your friends.
I was in Nashville and picked up my son and drove all the way to SLC. 615 days and I saw a bunch of cans and my mouth watered. I was tempted to drink on my flight. I didn't and it was an awesome drive without the deception.
I feel for you. I really do. You got some news that distracted you from the understanding that you were in a post HOF funk and needed to call out for support.
Before buying a can, will you call a brother and asked them to just be with you for a minute. You will be surprised that a real friend beats any buzz nicotine can offer.
Failure is a stepping stone to success if you get back on the horse!. So what is done is done. Today is a quit day and a day to mend your fences of trust and just get through today.
Surrender and failure are different. Never surrender to nicotine. Fix the leak and right the ship. Get back on course please and redeem yourself as my hero again.
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My prayers are with you and your family.
I hate that you had to experience a quit like this but I look forward to this all helping motivate you through your real quit.
Pinched
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Awful news about your father and I feel for you... hang in there. It has been said already... But you just proved the Sco Theorem. Now, you got 2 problems and neither was fixed by dipping. I see you realize that now, but a crappy way to learn the lesson. This is one of the cases where you need to just listen and believe what people tell you. You don't have to run an operational test of the theory. In fact, in this case it is highly discouraged.
When you answer the 3 questions (you pretty much hit 1 and 2), but I'd be interested in what you were thinking during that 100 miles. That is about an hr and a half.... You did not just dive into that can. You could have but you did not. You made a decision to wait. But you did not use your tools like you should have learned the past 113 days. Your answer to number 3 is a big deal. What are you gonna do different this time?
QLF today!
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I'm also sorry, Joe, and wish you and your family the best.
But I also agree with everyone else here: nicotine didn't make your dad any healthier.
Consider the fact that when life handed you shit, and you chose to shit in your hand some more AND THEN EAT IT. You could have chosen differently. Today, choose differently. Think about tomorrow only so that you are ready when life shits on you again.
Because it will. That's out of your control. What is in your control is (1) how you conduct yourself this moment (i.e., are you quit for today) and (2) how you respond when life shits on you (i.e., are you planning now for tomorrow's challenge).
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Saw your day 4 roll post today! I don't feel you answered all 3 questions yet I think you owe that to yourself to us. This is an important drill that you need to go thru.
1. I think you answered what happened pretty clearly in your post.
2. You could probably more clearly answer "why did it happen"? Maybe you already said enough there, but I don't understand what you were thinking for 100 miles of driving with an unopened can. Something was churning in there that told you "No!" and it was overcome by "Insert wad of garbage into piehole"
3. Most importantly, what are you going to do differently. You have been here a while you know the tools... so, what will be different this time.
Life does not stop happening and bad news/events will come... we need to navigate these lows without nicotine.. if we can't do that then why are we here?
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Saw your day 4 roll post today! I don't feel you answered all 3 questions yet I think you owe that to yourself to us. This is an important drill that you need to go thru.
1. I think you answered what happened pretty clearly in your post.
2. You could probably more clearly answer "why did it happen"? Maybe you already said enough there, but I don't understand what you were thinking for 100 miles of driving with an unopened can. Something was churning in there that told you "No!" and it was overcome by "Insert wad of garbage into piehole"
3. Most importantly, what are you going to do differently. You have been here a while you know the tools... so, what will be different this time.
Life does not stop happening and bad news/events will come... we need to navigate these lows without nicotine.. if we can't do that then why are we here?
Any thoughts Joe?
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Saw your day 4 roll post today! I don't feel you answered all 3 questions yet I think you owe that to yourself to us. This is an important drill that you need to go thru.Â
1. I think you answered what happened pretty clearly in your post.
2. You could probably more clearly answer "why did it happen"? Maybe you already said enough there, but I don't understand what you were thinking for 100 miles of driving with an unopened can. Something was churning in there that told you "No!" and it was overcome by "Insert wad of garbage into piehole"
3. Most importantly, what are you going to do differently. You have been here a while you know the tools... so, what will be different this time.Â
Life does not stop happening and bad news/events will come... we need to navigate these lows without nicotine.. if we can't do that then why are we here?
Any thoughts Joe?
Saw you posted up again today.
Guess I am the only one that cares you didn't answer the 3 questions. You have caved twice so looking at how you will do this different is most likely important. If I were you I'd do it, but I'm not you.
I am not going to bug you about it anymore. Best of luck with your quit.
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Saw your day 4 roll post today! I don't feel you answered all 3 questions yet I think you owe that to yourself to us. This is an important drill that you need to go thru.Â
1. I think you answered what happened pretty clearly in your post.
2. You could probably more clearly answer "why did it happen"?  Maybe you already said enough there, but I don't understand what you were thinking for 100 miles of driving with an unopened can. Something was churning in there that told you "No!" and it was overcome by "Insert wad of garbage into piehole"
3. Most importantly, what are you going to do differently. You have been here a while you know the tools... so, what will be different this time.Â
Life does not stop happening and bad news/events will come... we need to navigate these lows without nicotine.. if we can't do that then why are we here?
Any thoughts Joe?
Saw you posted up again today.
Guess I am the only one that cares you didn't answer the 3 questions. You have caved twice so looking at how you will do this different is most likely important. If I were you I'd do it, but I'm not you.
I am not going to bug you about it anymore. Best of luck with your quit.
Joe,
Remember that the questions and the answers are all for you, Derk40 is reminding you because for you to get mental closure on things and move on you need to be honest with yourself.
Or you can just move on, keep posting and prove everyone wrong, either way quit with a whole plan and don't look back.
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Saw your day 4 roll post today! I don't feel you answered all 3 questions yet I think you owe that to yourself to us. This is an important drill that you need to go thru.Â
1. I think you answered what happened pretty clearly in your post.
2. You could probably more clearly answer "why did it happen"?  Maybe you already said enough there, but I don't understand what you were thinking for 100 miles of driving with an unopened can. Something was churning in there that told you "No!" and it was overcome by "Insert wad of garbage into piehole"
3. Most importantly, what are you going to do differently. You have been here a while you know the tools... so, what will be different this time.Â
Life does not stop happening and bad news/events will come... we need to navigate these lows without nicotine.. if we can't do that then why are we here?
Any thoughts Joe?
Saw you posted up again today.
Guess I am the only one that cares you didn't answer the 3 questions. You have caved twice so looking at how you will do this different is most likely important. If I were you I'd do it, but I'm not you.
I am not going to bug you about it anymore. Best of luck with your quit.
Joe,
Remember that the questions and the answers are all for you, Derk40 is reminding you because for you to get mental closure on things and move on you need to be honest with yourself.
Or you can just move on, keep posting and prove everyone wrong, either way quit with a whole plan and don't look back.
It's sad we keep posting trying to hold these guys that cave accountable and are basically ignored. Regardless if it was a post HOF cave or day 2, 20, 40... it comes down to the deciding your going to do something to stay quit or just cave in like a pussy.
When you just ignore your brothers posting in your thread post cave, your only hiding from yourself. I'd rather see someone jump up and tells all to go fuck off, at least you would be showing some fighting spirit. Absence tells me that it's probably only a matter of time before we see another Day 1.... or worse yet, never see you again at all.....
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Saw your day 4 roll post today! I don't feel you answered all 3 questions yet I think you owe that to yourself to us. This is an important drill that you need to go thru.Â
1. I think you answered what happened pretty clearly in your post.
2. You could probably more clearly answer "why did it happen"?  Maybe you already said enough there, but I don't understand what you were thinking for 100 miles of driving with an unopened can. Something was churning in there that told you "No!" and it was overcome by "Insert wad of garbage into piehole"
3. Most importantly, what are you going to do differently. You have been here a while you know the tools... so, what will be different this time.Â
Life does not stop happening and bad news/events will come... we need to navigate these lows without nicotine.. if we can't do that then why are we here?
Any thoughts Joe?
Saw you posted up again today.
Guess I am the only one that cares you didn't answer the 3 questions. You have caved twice so looking at how you will do this different is most likely important. If I were you I'd do it, but I'm not you.
I am not going to bug you about it anymore. Best of luck with your quit.
Joe,
Remember that the questions and the answers are all for you, Derk40 is reminding you because for you to get mental closure on things and move on you need to be honest with yourself.
Or you can just move on, keep posting and prove everyone wrong, either way quit with a whole plan and don't look back.
It's sad we keep posting trying to hold these guys that cave accountable and are basically ignored. Regardless if it was a post HOF cave or day 2, 20, 40... it comes down to the deciding your going to do something to stay quit or just cave in like a pussy.
When you just ignore your brothers posting in your thread post cave, your only hiding from yourself. I'd rather see someone jump up and tells all to go fuck off, at least you would be showing some fighting spirit. Absence tells me that it's probably only a matter of time before we see another Day 1.... or worse yet, never see you again at all.....
The cornerstone of KTC is accountability, both self and peer accountability. These quitters are trying to help you understand that if you approach this quit like you did last time you will get the same results. You need more of a quit plan and in my opinion you still lack self accountability (hence losing the miles long debate with yourself), so you would do well to invest in some peer accountability.
Just my two cents...
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Saw your day 4 roll post today! I don't feel you answered all 3 questions yet I think you owe that to yourself to us. This is an important drill that you need to go thru.Â
1. I think you answered what happened pretty clearly in your post.
2. You could probably more clearly answer "why did it happen"?  Maybe you already said enough there, but I don't understand what you were thinking for 100 miles of driving with an unopened can. Something was churning in there that told you "No!" and it was overcome by "Insert wad of garbage into piehole"
3. Most importantly, what are you going to do differently. You have been here a while you know the tools... so, what will be different this time.Â
Life does not stop happening and bad news/events will come... we need to navigate these lows without nicotine.. if we can't do that then why are we here?
Any thoughts Joe?
Saw you posted up again today.
Guess I am the only one that cares you didn't answer the 3 questions. You have caved twice so looking at how you will do this different is most likely important. If I were you I'd do it, but I'm not you.
I am not going to bug you about it anymore. Best of luck with your quit.
Joe,
Remember that the questions and the answers are all for you, Derk40 is reminding you because for you to get mental closure on things and move on you need to be honest with yourself.
Or you can just move on, keep posting and prove everyone wrong, either way quit with a whole plan and don't look back.
It's sad we keep posting trying to hold these guys that cave accountable and are basically ignored. Regardless if it was a post HOF cave or day 2, 20, 40... it comes down to the deciding your going to do something to stay quit or just cave in like a pussy.
When you just ignore your brothers posting in your thread post cave, your only hiding from yourself. I'd rather see someone jump up and tells all to go fuck off, at least you would be showing some fighting spirit. Absence tells me that it's probably only a matter of time before we see another Day 1.... or worse yet, never see you again at all.....
The cornerstone of KTC is accountability, both self and peer accountability. These quitters are trying to help you understand that if you approach this quit like you did last time you will get the same results. You need more of a quit plan and in my opinion you still lack self accountability (hence losing the miles long debate with yourself), so you would do well to invest in some peer accountability.
Just my two cents...
Don't ignore this Joe, it won't go away. Your quit group is next to start asking for answers as well.
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Saw your day 4 roll post today! I don't feel you answered all 3 questions yet I think you owe that to yourself to us. This is an important drill that you need to go thru.Â
1. I think you answered what happened pretty clearly in your post.
2. You could probably more clearly answer "why did it happen"?  Maybe you already said enough there, but I don't understand what you were thinking for 100 miles of driving with an unopened can. Something was churning in there that told you "No!" and it was overcome by "Insert wad of garbage into piehole"
3. Most importantly, what are you going to do differently. You have been here a while you know the tools... so, what will be different this time.Â
Life does not stop happening and bad news/events will come... we need to navigate these lows without nicotine.. if we can't do that then why are we here?
Any thoughts Joe?
Saw you posted up again today.
Guess I am the only one that cares you didn't answer the 3 questions. You have caved twice so looking at how you will do this different is most likely important. If I were you I'd do it, but I'm not you.
I am not going to bug you about it anymore. Best of luck with your quit.
Joe,
Remember that the questions and the answers are all for you, Derk40 is reminding you because for you to get mental closure on things and move on you need to be honest with yourself.
Or you can just move on, keep posting and prove everyone wrong, either way quit with a whole plan and don't look back.
It's sad we keep posting trying to hold these guys that cave accountable and are basically ignored. Regardless if it was a post HOF cave or day 2, 20, 40... it comes down to the deciding your going to do something to stay quit or just cave in like a pussy.
When you just ignore your brothers posting in your thread post cave, your only hiding from yourself. I'd rather see someone jump up and tells all to go fuck off, at least you would be showing some fighting spirit. Absence tells me that it's probably only a matter of time before we see another Day 1.... or worse yet, never see you again at all.....
The cornerstone of KTC is accountability, both self and peer accountability. These quitters are trying to help you understand that if you approach this quit like you did last time you will get the same results. You need more of a quit plan and in my opinion you still lack self accountability (hence losing the miles long debate with yourself), so you would do well to invest in some peer accountability.
Just my two cents...
Don't ignore this Joe, it won't go away. Your quit group is next to start asking for answers as well.
Hey, hey. Nothing was being ignored. I did not know everyone was talking about this. I hardly even remember having an intro in the first place. I did attempt to answer questions 2 and 3 when I posted day 1 with Feb. There was no response and it was later in the evening when reading and posting is being done more than just roll.
I can't remember what exactly it was I said about #2. Technically the real question here is not "did that dip help your dad? " but rather should be "would getting home right away help my dad." That answer would be no, but at the time I was overcome with a need to get home and resorted to what used to help my cover long distances with ease.
For question #3 my answer was that I don't really feel that I have to do anything different. The whole 113 days I thought I missed nicotine and now I can see that I hate it. I bet you hate that answer. But I'd rather be on Day 6 and not want a thing to do with chew than be on day 119 and think I'm missing out on something. My quit just got a whole lot easier. These last 6 days have been a breeze compared to any other 6 days at any time.
Sorry about not reading this earlier, but I haven't been in the introduction thread for a very long time.
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Also, thank you all for prayers regarding my father. He has had a biopsy and news from that will be here soon.
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I caved.
I was worried about this vacation to Tennessee. A 13 hour drive was far longer than I have had to deal with so far. Before I left I got on the site and read up so I could build a solid defense. Turns out I had no trouble at all driving all the way to Chattanooga. I felt as though I had just cleared another hurdle and I was confident in my quit. Two days later (today) me and Mrs Mellow drove to Nashville for the next part of our trip. We arrived, walked around a bit, and then I got a call from home.
My brother called to inform me that Dad wasn't feeling well and was taken to the hospital. It was discovered that he has a brain tumor. Completely blindsided with the worst news I have ever heard, I could only do one thing, start driving home.
After a couple hours I decided that if I was going to make it home I would need chew. I bought some and it sat in my lap for 100 miles or so. My concern for that dip or lack of it paled in comparison for my concern for my father. Somewhere in southern Illinios I open it and put it in. I felt guilt and shame, but these emotions weren't, and still aren't much compared to the worry I have for the old man right now.
It didn't taste like I remembered. I didn't really like it, actually. For 5 minutes I didn't feel anything. Then in a sudden wave I felt sick. Hot flashes, upset stomach, dizziness. Then I started having an anxiety attack. I had a small anxiety attack once. It was nothing like this. I drove a few more miles and stopped on the off ramp. The wife asked if I was Ok, I said no. She was worried. We got out and as I tried to catch my breath I told her what happened.
In chat people talk about closing the door. How was that possible? I didn't see a way that I would ever have a strong enough quit to "close the door". I always felt like I was 10 minutes away from caving. I told my wife about this and informed her that I, too, just closed the door there on some off ramp in Illinois. My tin is still sitting there.
We started driving about 10 minutes later and I'm just now feeling better. She asked me how I felt. Well, there's a loaded question. I'm worried sick about my Dad and our family right now. I feel guilt and shame because I posted 113 this morning and didn't keep my word. But what I told her was "relief". I'm not worried about another cave anymore. She understood and I hope you do as well. Never again for any reason.
I want to be a part of this site. I want to be quit with everyone here and I want to help others in their struggle as well. I understand that you would question my word after what happened, but there is no need to question my respect for KTC and my desire to be a part of it.
Please say a prayer for my father. He is an amazing man. He will be very happy to hear what happened tonight.
This is me closing the door. Never again for any reason
Question 2. It happened because of a trigger and a bunch of emotions over a period of time.
Question 3. You will hate this answer, but I don't feel like I have to do anything different. I thought I missed chew. Now I know I hate it.
February, I would like to join your group, if that's cool. Sorry that I'm late to do this today, but it's been busy driving back home/hospital/kids and such.
I thank all those who PMed me and replied back for their concern and prayers for my Dad and also for letting me know how stupid I am.
We are taking Dad to Rochester for tests tomorrow.
For reference....the above is from the Feb14 group...the explanation you spoke of ...
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Looking for a JoeMellow Day 1 and answers to the big three. Please guys - put some thought into this. Alcohol is not the reason you caved, unless it lit the cigarette or packed you a lipper. (I did ask nicely):
Ajay, grizzywintergreen, and JoeMellow:
What happened? (Story)
Why did it happen? (cause/effect, not environment)
What are you going to do differently? (a real honest to goodness workable plan, not some fairy tale BS)
bump ttt
Also from the Feb14 group...
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Man, this thing (quitting) is tough. It it tough for you. No doubt. It is tough for everyone.
I hope you reconsider your answer to #3. You're right, we (me at least) are not gonna like that answer. I don't like that answer because I fear it will lead you to fail again. Note that i said "I fear", not "I know". Frankly, I don't think you even believe the answer you gave to #3. During some downtime, put some thought into it...it'll do us all some good.
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For question #3 my answer was that I don't really feel that I have to do anything different. The whole 113 days I thought I missed nicotine and now I can see that I hate it. I bet you hate that answer.
You are right Joe, I don't like that answer. I do hope you hate tobacco, but obviously that wasn't the case throughout your first 100+ days. I agree with Zam, give it some real thought and build a *better* quit than the stop you had before...
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For question #3 my answer was that I don't really feel that I have to do anything different. The whole 113 days I thought I missed nicotine and now I can see that I hate it. I bet you hate that answer.
You are right Joe, I don't like that answer. I do hope you hate tobacco, but obviously that wasn't the case throughout your first 100+ days. I agree with Zam, give it some real thought and build a *better* quit than the stop you had before...
I think we all fight differently. I have observed quitter who do not think its right to hold UST accountable for their addiction. Maybe that's fair and maybe that naive.
I have seen that the truly quit are the ones that don't glamorize nicotine. We have served nicotine, worshiped nicotine and loved nicotine.
If I had a shred of respect, love or understanding for that weed, my quit would have been a bigger battle.
I think that my quit didn't really become strong until I was pissed at what I became with her. Yeah I think my quit really was determined once I put enmity between me and her.
Hate isn't the ingredient for quit. Its more about honesty. The first step in overcoming addiction is in being honest. I am addicted to nicotine and I hate nicotine.
I fight a war to death when I protect my freedom and hate any product or person that thinks they can make me a subject!
Fuck Nicotine and Fuck what it made me and I HATE USTobacco and the product the fuckers sell. The secretly enslave children.
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For question #3 my answer was that I don't really feel that I have to do anything different. The whole 113 days I thought I missed nicotine and now I can see that I hate it. I bet you hate that answer.
You are right Joe, I don't like that answer. I do hope you hate tobacco, but obviously that wasn't the case throughout your first 100+ days. I agree with Zam, give it some real thought and build a *better* quit than the stop you had before...
I think we all fight differently. I have observed quitter who do not think its right to hold UST accountable for their addiction. Maybe that's fair and maybe that naive.
I have seen that the truly quit are the ones that don't glamorize nicotine. We have served nicotine, worshiped nicotine and loved nicotine.
If I had a shred of respect, love or understanding for that weed, my quit would have been a bigger battle.
I think that my quit didn't really become strong until I was pissed at what I became with her. Yeah I think my quit really was determined once I put enmity between me and her.
Hate isn't the ingredient for quit. Its more about honesty. The first step in overcoming addiction is in being honest. I am addicted to nicotine and I hate nicotine.
I fight a war to death when I protect my freedom and hate any product or person that thinks they can make me a subject!
Fuck Nicotine and Fuck what it made me and I HATE USTobacco and the product the fuckers sell. The secretly enslave children.
hey Joe,
On your day one you said:
"MOST IMPORTANLY is my goal to quit the nic."
1. you are not here by accident.
2. you obviously want to "be quit".
3. you forgot your "day one". You got proud and cocky...it helps to stay humble and accept you're really an addict for life.
I dipped for 30 years, come from a family of nic and alcohol addicts. Trust me, you can do this if you reeeeeaaaalllllyy want to. I find the only way to do this is ODAAT and staying active in my quit and this site.
Try and and do this for YOU and only you.
You really don't want to be on your cancer bed wishing you had more time on this earth.
Cheers.
Listen to Mthomas, T-Cell and the other men fighting the same war.
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Yes, I was proud of my 113. I was not cocky about it. I was well aware that I could cave at any time. Now, I'm less proud because I'm on day 8. I'm also much more cocky now. I had an experience with nicotine that I do not ever want to happen again. It's just like MThomas says. He hates it. He does not glamorize it. I now feel that I'm on the same page. It's funny, this morning I just seen a picture that my wife took awhile back with me and the kids in the front yard. I have an obvious fat lower lip and I was so happy with just how stupid I thought I looked.
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Yes, I was proud of my 113. I was not cocky about it. I was well aware that I could cave at any time. Now, I'm less proud because I'm on day 8. I'm also much more cocky now. I had an experience with nicotine that I do not ever want to happen again. It's just like MThomas says. He hates it. He does not glamorize it. I now feel that I'm on the same page. It's funny, this morning I just seen a picture that my wife took awhile back with me and the kids in the front yard. I have an obvious fat lower lip and I was so happy with just how stupid I thought I looked.
Joe,
Be proud that you are on day 8; some people would have used the cave as an excuse to keep doing it. You picked yourself up, came clean with your wife and KTC, and you are back to quitting.
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Joe,
Can you give us a brief narrative of what you were thinking what you were feeling for a 100 miles with a can on your lap? There are a few of us that are having a very hard time processing that.
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Joe,
Can you give us a brief narrative of what you were thinking what you were feeling for a 100 miles with a can on your lap? There are a few of us that are having a very hard time processing that.
Get home.
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Joe,
Can you give us a brief narrative of what you were thinking what you were feeling for a 100 miles with a can on your lap? There are a few of us that are having a very hard time processing that.
Get home.
I could write a wall of text here analyzing the amount of bullshit in most of your answers Joe. I won't though.....that really isn't necessary.
The bottom line is Joe, I don't believe you....not even a little. Your cocky this time, your proud to be on day 8 again....it's all crap. We all have moments in our quit when we are tested, the difference between a quitter and a stopper....is that a quitter "decides" to reach out or do something to stay quit. A stopper goes ahead and talks themselves into another dip.
I am glad you are here, posting with your new group. The only question that really will matter in the long run is are you quitter this time?
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Joe,
Can you give us a brief narrative of what you were thinking what you were feeling for a 100 miles with a can on your lap? There are a few of us that are having a very hard time processing that.
Get home.
Pathetic.
Try again.
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Joe,
Can you give us a brief narrative of what you were thinking what you were feeling for a 100 miles with a can on your lap? There are a few of us that are having a very hard time processing that.
Get home.
Pathetic.
Try again.
Look at the original post. What on earth do you think would be on my mind? I don't see why you are trying to get under my skin here. Run this scenario in your head and ask if it is possible. Terrible news about your father just reached you and then you think "Hey, guess I can fix it with a dip" Think about how preposterous that sounds.
Now, think about the answer that I gave already. After getting the phone call I thought about family. I thought about driving 10 hours to my family. When I became fatigued I bought a can. It sat there as I described already. I used dip the same way that did before, to keep driving. Many people use chew on long rides and I was no exception. The chew didn't work. I had nothing left for the next 5 hours so I got a hotel.
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Joe,
Can you give us a brief narrative of what you were thinking what you were feeling for a 100 miles with a can on your lap? There are a few of us that are having a very hard time processing that.
Get home.
Pathetic.
Try again.
Look at the original post. What on earth do you think would be on my mind? I don't see why you are trying to get under my skin here. Run this scenario in your head and ask if it is possible. Terrible news about your father just reached you and then you think "Hey, guess I can fix it with a dip" Think about how preposterous that sounds.
Now, think about the answer that I gave already. After getting the phone call I thought about family. I thought about driving 10 hours to my family. When I became fatigued I bought a can. It sat there as I described already. I used dip the same way that did before, to keep driving. Many people use chew on long rides and I was no exception. The chew didn't work. I had nothing left for the next 5 hours so I got a hotel.
Not sure anyone is trying to get under your skin... just trying to be real with you. You caved, are back posting roll... now everyone here wants you to succeed. Period.
However, Not sure if you realize that your answer about using dip to prolong your ability to stay awake does not make sense. Did you ever think of your quit? Did you ever think about reaching out to someone? Did you ever think of using your quit tools? Did you think about that at all? What went thru your head about this purchase cave before it went down.
You said you caved because of a long drive home. After 100+ days you should have at least went thru a process and used your quit tools to prevent you from making such a poor decision. Doesn't sound like you did any of that.
Why didn't you just buy a soda or a cup of coffee. Get some seeds, or something else to keep you occupied during your ride. Why not buy some of the fake dip instead.
You have been around for a long time should know better. As far as what you would do differently... Saying you don't like the taste anymore so I am good to go is not something to hang your hat on.
That is why folks are saying you probably need to work on your answer to number 3. You don't seem to have a plan at all Joe.
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Joe,
Can you give us a brief narrative of what you were thinking what you were feeling for a 100 miles with a can on your lap? There are a few of us that are having a very hard time processing that.
Get home.
Pathetic.
Try again.
Look at the original post. What on earth do you think would be on my mind? I don't see why you are trying to get under my skin here. Run this scenario in your head and ask if it is possible. Terrible news about your father just reached you and then you think "Hey, guess I can fix it with a dip" Think about how preposterous that sounds.
Now, think about the answer that I gave already. After getting the phone call I thought about family. I thought about driving 10 hours to my family. When I became fatigued I bought a can. It sat there as I described already. I used dip the same way that did before, to keep driving. Many people use chew on long rides and I was no exception. The chew didn't work. I had nothing left for the next 5 hours so I got a hotel.
Not sure anyone is trying to get under your skin... just trying to be real with you. You caved, are back posting roll... now everyone here wants you to succeed. Period.
However, Not sure if you realize that your answer about using dip to prolong your ability to stay awake does not make sense. Did you ever think of your quit? Did you ever think about reaching out to someone? Did you ever think of using your quit tools? Did you think about that at all? What went thru your head about this purchase cave before it went down.
You said you caved because of a long drive home. After 100+ days you should have at least went thru a process and used your quit tools to prevent you from making such a poor decision. Doesn't sound like you did any of that.
Why didn't you just buy a soda or a cup of coffee. Get some seeds, or something else to keep you occupied during your ride. Why not buy some of the fake dip instead.
You have been around for a long time should know better. As far as what you would do differently... Saying you don't like the taste anymore so I am good to go is not something to hang your hat on.
That is why folks are saying you probably need to work on your answer to number 3. You don't seem to have a plan at all Joe.
I am not here for an argument with anyone on this subject and although I have remained quit for many many days I think I can understand that Joe doesn't have that good answer that some are seeking.
The Nic bitch got Joe, she lured him in and he took the bait. I think you can ask him 100 times and he isn't going to have an answer that you like. His quit was young, he was probably in a "funky" area and then he got whacked with terrible news, and wham just like those stupid commercials with the devil on some dudes shoulder there she was trying to get him back and she did for a little bit.
I don't say any of this to get you to back off Joe, I mean Derk is right, why didn't you use your tools? I talk about this because I know Joe is a badass mother#$%^* and if she got to him she can get to you so have a plan when a similar situation hits you.
Above all realize that dip will NOT fix anything.
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if she got to him she can get to you
I agree with everything you say but this....I will never again NOT FOR ANY REASON!!!
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if she got to him she can get to you
I agree with everything you say but this....I will never again NOT FOR ANY REASON!!!
...unless you have a plan
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if she got to him she can get to you
I agree with everything you say but this....I will never again NOT FOR ANY REASON!!!
...unless you have a plan
copy that!