KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Richard K on September 17, 2018, 04:16:16 PM
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02 Apr 2016, 18:01 #1
I used to say I quit quitting cause quitting is for quitters!! I fed that line to myself for years but it was never very successful for me. I have been a nicotine user since I was 8 years old, I know, wholly shit 8 years old!?? I was a huge follower at that time, almost everyone I knew did smokes or dip and I wanted to be just like them. I stole my first smoke from my mom Salem lights 100's, I have been hooked ever since. I tried to quit here and there, never really successful with it because I was never very positive about it, I always had the defeatist attitude. My son was born in April 2004 and after that I realized that I should quit at least for him. I told myself that if I dip for 3 days I can kick the habit. That was 12 years ago to almost the day that I told myself that lie. Dipping was so much different than smoking, It gave me a better high at first and I could do it anywhere as long as I had a spitter of some sort. I could never gut it, that is probably a good thing. I tried to quit dipping a few times but always went back to smoking or my mind fucked with me long enough and hard enough that I would pick it back up again quickly. Well recently I started to realize how much I did not like dipping anymore. The taste, the feel, the action, always having a bottle of brown spit in my hand or in almost every room or car that I own. God forbid I didn't have a place to spit!! Well I just go sick of it!!! I found myself taking the dips out a few minutes of putting them in. Just wasting me and my families money. On Sunday the 27th of March 2016 I decided to allow my self no more than two dips the next day, but I had to go as long as I could with out one. I took my dip out at 6pm on the 27th and made it to 1230 on the 28th, It was hard but I realized I could do it!!! I had one more dip on the 28th and I took that out at 330 pm, that way I could take the edge off before I went home to the wife and kids. That was the last dip I took, I have been dip free since 330 pm on the 28th of March 2016. It has been hard as hell in many cases but easier than I thought in others. I am just done with it and never want to have another dip again or even nicotine ever again. I will be 40 this August and want to be able to grow old and see my 4 year daughter get married and have kids!! I got this, this time!! But I will need help, I have always looked at this site because it was very informative and I took the jump and joined.
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04 Nov 2016, 06:57 #19
Sometimes I forget to come back to my intro to see if there is any support going on in here. I get busy and forget a lot of things on a daily basis, I never used to forget to put a dip in every chance I got either. ONCE I got sick of her shit and put it down for good I haven't forgot to post roll everyday either. I figures if I can dip every mornING or every day why not post roll EDD. HAS the thought crossed my mind about leaving KTC? HEll yes it has! Will not lie about that at all. It was pretty recently as well. There has always been something that has kept me here though. Kind of ironic that my habit with the nic bitch always had something bringing me back to her, calling me, ensuring me that everything will be OK with her in my lip.
She is gone, I don't need nor want her anymore, I know that she is sneaky but so are all the BAQ''s in this forum. MIKE1966 put it best as we all start out strangers, reluctant to drink the kool-aid at first, shy, ashamed and even ragefully stubborn. WE give out our numbers to text or receive text from complete strangers, we join group me and have some pretty off the wall conversations. CONVERSATIONS about music, dip dreams, family, good times and heart aches. We get pissed at each other for not posting or even cause we are blunt with each other in order to keep each other accountable.
We support other groups from other years and even conduct their special occasions and milestones. We post support in other groups because members of your group have caved and started over, some do not. WE take the pesonal victories and share them amongst our new friends and they share that victory with us as we share in thiers! Every victory whether larhe or small can be huge for a bunch of strangers with one cause in common.
Do I think about leaving, yes, will I ? who knows, bUT all the things I stated above are just a few of the reasons that I keep coming back. WE are family in all kinds of ways. WE support each other and keep us on track. THANK you to everyone that always supports me and everyone else in this forum. Thank you to my brothers in the Phalanx, even LJT! My foster family the STD''s and all of my HOF conductor friends. Thank you for helping me be who I am today!!
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17 Dec 2016, 08:57 #24
Deeper than Nicotine
The addict brain can range amongst many things from drugs obsessive compulsive disorder or even nicotine. How many people can look back and say that they have caved while trying to quit nicotine over and over and over again? Every time we cave we think it’s because we are weak and that we can’t handle the stress of quitting. I don’t feel that is because we are weak I feel that there is deeper issues within ourselves. I even titled my hall of fame speech rising from the grips of demons for a reason. There is more to it than quitting at the weed tobacco nicotine or the urge of having an oral fixation. It is true that the nic bitch holds you down like a ball and chain like Mike1966 has mentioned many, many times before in this forum.
I have seen many people cave, I have too, many of times during my stops, this is by far the best most successful quit that I’ve ever had in my life. I quit dip this time because I was sick of my jaw hurting I was over putting a dip in and taking it right out and wasting my money. I looked at my kids and I saw that every time I was spitting they were wondering what I was doing. I had Spitters in every car and almost every room in the house to include my office at work.
I started going through counseling right before I quit dip, Mrs. K and I were going through a very rough patch in our marriage at this time and we almost were getting a divorce. Something had to change drastically and immediately. Why did I start using nicotine? To be cool? To be part of the crowd? To be accepted? I think not! I was trying to fill a void, that empty space in my heart, my soul, my life. My father always made it seem like I had to be perfect in every aspect of my life so I was always trying to be perfect. News flash Richard! you cannot be perfect, nobody can be perfect, and running your life like that is going to do nothing but ruin it. I was sexually abused by the neighborhood boy up the street and a strange man at the swimming pool One Summer. Compiled with daddy issues not being accepted in school being an outcast my Depression started to rise I had nowhere else to turn, my friends were bad influences, I was a follower, I was weak, I need to be part of something.
I started to smoke, I thought it was cool, it was filling that void, or so I thought. Counseling has taught me a lot, I started working on my inner demons, my marriage has gotten better, me being a father has gotten better, I have quit dip and I do not ever look in my rearview mirror for it anymore other than to realize that it can still sneak up on me. I don’t need that to fill a void in my life anymore, I have my family and that is fill enough. I have my life, I have all my friends, life is good, life is better, life without dip.
It wasn’t until recently when I was watching all the people in March November October December January going through all the rage that we went through in our group of July and I started to realize with all the cavers and all the stressful situations, deaths, miscarriages, deployments, that compiling another problem on top of those will never be successful. When I realized that my mental state and I had to face all my inner demons I realized that is what was holding me back with quitting dip. it was all she wrote, it was Off to the Races and there I was living my life to the newest chapter. Just remember it is always deeper than just the nic. find that root cause and work on that and it’ll help you be successful in your quit reach out help each other, help you. We all have stories like this, we all walk in each other’s shoes, just in our own way. All we need to do is quit for these 24 hours and these 24 hours alone, it is that easy.
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Quitters-
Before you cave I want you to think about a few things. As I sit here at day 900 thinking back at what is was like to go through the fog of quitting I hear the news of another brother who has failed. It hurts me to the core to hear this because of everything that is available in this site, the support and everything that has gone on in my life the last few months.
Look around you guys, there are so many stories and scenarios of people on this site who have succumbed to Cancer! We have many members right now who are suffering from the disease that does not differentiate race, ethnicity, white or blue collar and even sex. They go to Chemo or radiation all the time to try and prevent the disease from taking over. Hell!! We have a section for Eternal quitters that have passed on, now not all of them to Cancer but most.
In April of this year my father was diagnosed with Colon Cancer and had surgery to remove it on May 17th. With any surgery there have been issues that have come up to include sepsis, MRSA, ileostomy bag, weight loss from over 200lbs to 130lbs. He has had over four surgeries to correct all the complications from not only the Cancer but the surgeries as well. He has had two collapsed lungs, two tubes inserted into his lungs three times to drain blood and other fluids. Has been fed through tubes, bed sores and a tube inserted into the bed sore to drain. He can’t walk because he is so week and relies on my mother and a nurse to take care of him. All of this before he even goes through the 6 to 8 weeks of chemo he is scheduled to go through to try and get rid of the cancer on his lungs.
My father just recently turned 72 and was the pillar of health and to the family. He was a work horse all the way up until his surgery. He never stopped and always was working on the house, cars, helping other people out. He was boisterous and outgoing, a strong man that I look up to all the time. Now he is week and in no way looks like the man he was just a few months ago. We pray every day for his improvement but it looks bleak to say the least.
This came out of nowhere!! Cancer knocked on the door and is slowly taking my father and has taken friends of mine, to include people on this site. Cancer does not give a shit that we love him! Cancer does not give a shit that he still has things to finish for our mother! Cancer does not care that he was a strong man who fought in Vietnam and lived through that!
CANCER DOES NOT GIVE A FUCK!!!
So before you cave!
Think about this!
Ponder on this!
Visualize yourself going through this!
Visualize your family going through this!
Is it worth your life to put that shit back in your lip and assist Cancer in taking your life! Do not give it another reason to take you!
I quit with every single one of you bad ass quitters! For today! Tomorrow is another day!
Richard K
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Yesterday was a normal day for sure, busy as hell in the shop and I was working hard on my retirement paperwork and medical screenings. Like always, I wanted to walk around the shops to see how the floor mechanics were doing and wanted to see if they had any questions. The building is kind of big with three shops in it. Heavy equipment repair (Dozers, graders, scrapers etc), Light equipment repair ( Pickups, tractor trailers, flatbeds etc) and a support equipment shop (Tactical generators, welders, forklifts, etc). The admin part seperates the support and light shops while the long hallway down the center of the building leads directly to my favorite shop, the heavy shop. I pass by the technical library, the parts supply room and the specialty tool room on my way to my mecca of being a mechanic. Even though I haven't turned a wrench on these earth movers is almost ten years I still love the smell of dirt mixed with grease and the smell of diesel and hydraulic fluid. Man it brings me back to what made me want to join the Navy.
However, yesterday was a little different. As I was walking around the building checking with the shop supervisors and the troops on the floor working on the equipment I reached down to the pocket of my Camies right above my boot on the right leg and felt for my can of Red Seal or Cope. This is where I used to keep in when I was in uniform. A perfect pocket for that small can of addiction. The pocket was empty of course, but that did not suffice at the time. I walked up to one of the guys I know that dip and pinched my middle finger and thumb together and made the motion like I was packing a tin to him. He knew exactly what I wanted and reached into his pocket and handed me his can of cope. I packed it, opened it and took a three finger fatty and placed in neatly in the pocket of the left side of my mouth. Right where I always did. It was so natural even though I haven't done it in almost 1000 days.
It coursed through my body like I never quit and made me feel light headed. I started to walk around the shop and started to get sick at my stomach. I was getting sick at my stomach because of three things. I was truly getting sick, I was sick because I let my family down, and I was sick because I let all of you down. I was so pissed at myself for throwing this all away, and throwing away my bond that I have with all of you in the PHALANX and here on KTC. I quickly spit it out into the trashcan and ran into the bathroom to rinse that evil shit out of my mouth. I was mortified that I did this and I was so afraid to tell you guys that I caved. This has got to be one of the worst feelings of my life! I started screaming out loud! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! And in doing so I woke my wife up as well as myself.
That's right! Thank God it was a fucking dream!! It felt so real and the emotions that I felt about caving made me come right in here and tell you bad asses about it. Even at 914 that sneaky Bitch can creep into your mind and mind fuck you to believe that one will not hurt! BULLSHIT!!! Fuck that!! Keep your head on a swivel guys and gals. She is lurking in the shadows and will never stop trying to bring you back to that side. Addiction is real people, we here are all addicts and that will never change. We are never cured, we are never through the woods. We will have to consciously make that decision every single damn day to remain quit and vigilant in our quit. Just like we did when we were finger banging that cancer dirt every damn day.
So wake up, Piss, post! Every Damn Day.
I quit with you again today, and tomorrow is another day to do it all over again.
Richard K- 914
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Yesterday was a normal day for sure, busy as hell in the shop and I was working hard on my retirement paperwork and medical screenings. Like always, I wanted to walk around the shops to see how the floor mechanics were doing and wanted to see if they had any questions. The building is kind of big with three shops in it. Heavy equipment repair (Dozers, graders, scrapers etc), Light equipment repair ( Pickups, tractor trailers, flatbeds etc) and a support equipment shop (Tactical generators, welders, forklifts, etc). The admin part seperates the support and light shops while the long hallway down the center of the building leads directly to my favorite shop, the heavy shop. I pass by the technical library, the parts supply room and the specialty tool room on my way to my mecca of being a mechanic. Even though I haven't turned a wrench on these earth movers is almost ten years I still love the smell of dirt mixed with grease and the smell of diesel and hydraulic fluid. Man it brings me back to what made me want to join the Navy.
However, yesterday was a little different. As I was walking around the building checking with the shop supervisors and the troops on the floor working on the equipment I reached down to the pocket of my Camies right above my boot on the right leg and felt for my can of Red Seal or Cope. This is where I used to keep in when I was in uniform. A perfect pocket for that small can of addiction. The pocket was empty of course, but that did not suffice at the time. I walked up to one of the guys I know that dip and pinched my middle finger and thumb together and made the motion like I was packing a tin to him. He knew exactly what I wanted and reached into his pocket and handed me his can of cope. I packed it, opened it and took a three finger fatty and placed in neatly in the pocket of the left side of my mouth. Right where I always did. It was so natural even though I haven't done it in almost 1000 days.
It coursed through my body like I never quit and made me feel light headed. I started to walk around the shop and started to get sick at my stomach. I was getting sick at my stomach because of three things. I was truly getting sick, I was sick because I let my family down, and I was sick because I let all of you down. I was so pissed at myself for throwing this all away, and throwing away my bond that I have with all of you in the PHALANX and here on KTC. I quickly spit it out into the trashcan and ran into the bathroom to rinse that evil shit out of my mouth. I was mortified that I did this and I was so afraid to tell you guys that I caved. This has got to be one of the worst feelings of my life! I started screaming out loud! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! And in doing so I woke my wife up as well as myself.
That's right! Thank God it was a fucking dream!! It felt so real and the emotions that I felt about caving made me come right in here and tell you bad asses about it. Even at 914 that sneaky Bitch can creep into your mind and mind fuck you to believe that one will not hurt! BULLSHIT!!! Fuck that!! Keep your head on a swivel guys and gals. She is lurking in the shadows and will never stop trying to bring you back to that side. Addiction is real people, we here are all addicts and that will never change. We are never cured, we are never through the woods. We will have to consciously make that decision every single damn day to remain quit and vigilant in our quit. Just like we did when we were finger banging that cancer dirt every damn day.
So wake up, Piss, post! Every Damn Day.
I quit with you again today, and tomorrow is another day to do it all over again.
Richard K- 914
That Bitch never gives up. Soooo glad it was only a dream brother Richard. But dreams do have meanings behind them. I would be curious to see if we have had any psychologists do a work up on the meaning of dip dreams and what their main causes are. Man, I bet you freaked the shit outta your wife.
Proud to quit with you today - chris2alaska 253
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I used to say I quit quitting cause quitting is for quitters!! I fed that line to myself for years but it was never very successful for me. I have been a nicotine user since I was 8 years old, I know, wholly shit 8 years old!?? I was a huge follower at that time, almost everyone I knew did smokes or dip and I wanted to be just like them. I stole my first smoke from my mom Salem lights 100's, I have been hooked ever since. I tried to quit here and there, never really successful with it because I was never very positive about it, I always had the defeatist attitude. My son was born in April 2004 and after that I realized that I should quit at least for him. I told myself that if I dip for 3 days I can kick the habit. That was 12 years ago to almost the day that I told myself that lie. Dipping was so much different than smoking, It gave me a better high at first and I could do it anywhere as long as I had a spitter of some sort. I could never gut it, that is probably a good thing. I tried to quit dipping a few times but always went back to smoking or my mind fucked with me long enough and hard enough that I would pick it back up again quickly. Well recently I started to realize how much I did not like dipping anymore. The taste, the feel, the action, always having a bottle of brown spit in my hand or in almost every room or car that I own. God forbid I didn't have a place to spit!! Well I just go sick of it!!! I found myself taking the dips out a few minutes of putting them in. Just wasting me and my families money. On Sunday the 27th of March 2016 I decided to allow my self no more than two dips the next day, but I had to go as long as I could with out one. I took my dip out at 6pm on the 27th and made it to 1230 on the 28th, It was hard but I realized I could do it!!! I had one more dip on the 28th and I took that out at 330 pm, that way I could take the edge off before I went home to the wife and kids. That was the last dip I took, I have been dip free since 330 pm on the 28th of March 2016. It has been hard as hell in many cases but easier than I thought in others. I am just done with it and never want to have another dip again or even nicotine ever again. I will be 40 this August and want to be able to grow old and see my 4 year daughter get married and have kids!! I got this, this time!! But I will need help, I have always looked at this site because it was very informative and I took the jump and joined.
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Welcome and congratulations on the best decision of your life.
Find the Quit Groups section here in the forum. Scroll down to the July 2016 pre HOF group - that's your group. There are directions for posting roll in the thread. Posting roll is your promise to not use nicotine in any form for the day. We post roll every day, as soon as we can in the morning.
Post roll. Stay quit. It's that simple, not easy but simple.
Proud to be quit with you.
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So glad to quit with you today and offer ANY support that you may need!
Reach out to the "Veterans" around here, they are some of the most amazing people I have ever come into contact with and their knowledge on defeating nicotine is priceless.
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Richard.... Breathe pard!
Its your turn.
40 years is enough.
You have made the correct decision this time.
Welcome to a new life with out a rope tied around your neck.
We quite now.
We quit just for today.
Tomorrow might not show up.
Let's stop talking about yesterday,
Let's not worry about tomorrow.
Let's be clean and proud about today.
I quit with you today.
Great job posting roll.
Do it early.....
Rawls 502
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Welcome to the asylum! There is no better place for quitters. This place is full of f%$ing Rockstar quitters! The plan is real simple, even a dumbass like me can figure it out, so for sure someone as smart as you can do this to. Make the promise each day to abstain from using the damn poisonous weed and keep that promise to YOURSELF to your KTC brothers/sisters. Sleep, get up and do it again. Repeat daily and you will not fail! Posting Roll and honoring your promise is the path to freedom my friend and that is truth!
Menace
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You came in with a great intro and then posted roll. That's a great start. You are now quitting with us and not quitting alone, which made all the difference in the world to me.
Every time I read an intro like yours I think, "this guy has got what it takes". Everybody comes to this site looking to quit dip, but not everyone comes to this site looking to get back control of their life. Your addiction has controlled your life...it rings a bell and you put in a dip, it rings a bell and you light up, man I used to not need an alarm clock because my addiction would wake me up so it could get its fix. The last 10 years of the 28 I dipped I wanted nothing to do with dip. But wanting to quit dipping wasn't enough. It wasn't until I got pissed off about not being in control of what I put in my body that I made any traction in my quit.
Buckle up Richard because quitting is a hard process. your will power will be tested all the time. But posting roll is the bedrock of my quit...make it the same for yours. Every day I post, I am making a promise to thousands of quitters that I am quit today. That promise has gotten me through dozens of days that I would have definitely caved in the past. So post roll everyday without fail. Good luck
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Welcome to freedom, Richard! Post roll every morning making your promise to stay nicotine free for 24 hours and then keep your word. There's lots of support here on KTC from quitters that have been right where you are experiencing what you are, take advantage of that. Stay quit!
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Thank you all for the encouragement. I never had this type of support before so I know that this is it!! Thank you!
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Just today, Make a promise, keep it, and do it again tomorrow. The days will add up quicker than you know. Focus on staying quit today, worry about staying quit tomorrow, well tomorrow.
I quit with you Sir!
Quit to Live- 175
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Heart is in the right place...no doubt about that, but a word of caution Richard. Make this quit about you. The only way you'll succeed is if you want this more than anything. You gotta be the one who wants to be free from the can, to get your life back, to be healthy. Your quit should be 100% selfish.
It sounds a bit backwards, but the thing is,...all of us have said we want to quit for our kids, our families, our loved ones. And all of us failed when we did that. However, when you quit for yourself, and you begin the reap the benefits of being free...everybody else around you reaps these benefits. Your kids, your wife, your loved ones will get to be around you - a dip free and healthy person who is capable of enjoying life. So, do this for you and they will benefit from your selfishness.
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Richard, I'm sorry to inform you that you have been "Steakbombed". This means that from here on out you can NEVER smell, taste, touch, inhale, absorb, or make obscene gestures with nicotine. 'Shoot' You must post roll EDD (Every Damn Day), ODAAT (One Day At A Time), FHTE (From Here to Eternity). 'drool' But, if can do it, so can you and besides; now that you have been notified by "Steakbomb", you don't have a freaking choice. Your mind will now automatically sync to your quit group and you will become enamored with "QUIT". 'nutkick'
BTW, Steakbomb plus many others will be here to help you along the way. Trust me the price for admission to this place is cheap compared to the freedom it gives. What's the price, you may ask. PRD (Post Roll Daily).
I quit with ya brother.
Mogul
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Congrats brother on the quit.
Hang tight its going to be a wild ride.
X-change some digits with your group and get commit daily.
I quit with you today.
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I smell a quitter! Keep doing what has gotten you this far; it's working. Lots of "thrills" left in your roller-coaster ride of QUIT, but if you have gotten this far, then there is NO reason you can't handle every trick the nic-bitch has left. Keep fighting until it doesn't suck anymore :) Trust me, you are so close to a way better place.
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Congrats on the 2nd floor Richard! You're one BAQ. Thanks for all you do for July. You've been a powerful influence on my Quit especially in the last 50 days. I can't imagine KTC or July without you brother! Remember there are exactly 21 days difference in our Quit let's keep it that way. Damn this is starting to sound a little ghey!!! What I meant to say was goooooo Pirates! yeah!!!
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Congrats on the 2nd floor Richard! You're one BAQ. Thanks for all you do for July. You've been a powerful influence on my Quit especially in the last 50 days. I can't imagine KTC or July without you brother! Remember there are exactly 21 days difference in our Quit let's keep it that way. Damn this is starting to sound a little ghey!!! What I meant to say was goooooo Pirates! yeah!!!
Congrats on 200 days RichK!!!
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Congrats on the 2nd floor Richard! You're one BAQ. Thanks for all you do for July. You've been a powerful influence on my Quit especially in the last 50 days. I can't imagine KTC or July without you brother! Remember there are exactly 21 days difference in our Quit let's keep it that way. Damn this is starting to sound a little ghey!!! What I meant to say was goooooo Pirates! yeah!!!
Congrats on 200 days RichK!!!
Well done SIR!
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Congrats on the 2nd floor Richard! You're one BAQ. Thanks for all you do for July. You've been a powerful influence on my Quit especially in the last 50 days. I can't imagine KTC or July without you brother! Remember there are exactly 21 days difference in our Quit let's keep it that way. Damn this is starting to sound a little ghey!!! What I meant to say was goooooo Pirates! yeah!!!
Congrats on 200 days RichK!!!
Well done SIR!
Congratulations my friend! It gets alot sweeter!
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Congrats on the 2nd floor Richard! You're one BAQ. Thanks for all you do for July. You've been a powerful influence on my Quit especially in the last 50 days. I can't imagine KTC or July without you brother! Remember there are exactly 21 days difference in our Quit let's keep it that way. Damn this is starting to sound a little ghey!!! What I meant to say was goooooo Pirates! yeah!!!
Congrats on 200 days RichK!!!
Well done SIR!
Congratulations my friend! It gets alot sweeter!
Way to go buddy! Proud to be quit with you EDD!
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Sometimes I forget to come back to my intro to see if there is any support going on in here. I get busy and forget a lot of things on a daily basis, I never used to forget to put a dip in every chance I got either. ONCE I got sick of her shit and put it down for good I haven't forgot to post roll everyday either. I figures if I can dip every mornING or every day why not post roll EDD. HAS the thought crossed my mind about leaving KTC? HEll yes it has! Will not lie about that at all. It was pretty recently as well. There has always been something that has kept me here though. Kind of ironic that my habit with the nic bitch always had something bringing me back to her, calling me, ensuring me that everything will be OK with her in my lip.
She is gone, I don't need nor want her anymore, I know that she is sneaky but so are all the BAQ''s in this forum. MIKE1966 put it best as we all start out strangers, reluctant to drink the kool-aid at first, shy, ashamed and even ragefully stubborn. WE give out our numbers to text or receive text from complete strangers, we join group me and have some pretty off the wall conversations. CONVERSATIONS about music, dip dreams, family, good times and heart aches. We get pissed at each other for not posting or even cause we are blunt with each other in order to keep each other accountable.
We support other groups from other years and even conduct their special occasions and milestones. We post support in other groups because members of your group have caved and started over, some do not. WE take the pesonal victories and share them amongst our new friends and they share that victory with us as we share in thiers! Every victory whether larhe or small can be huge for a bunch of strangers with one cause in common.
Do I think about leaving, yes, will I ? who knows, bUT all the things I stated above are just a few of the reasons that I keep coming back. WE are family in all kinds of ways. WE support each other and keep us on track. THANK you to everyone that always supports me and everyone else in this forum. Thank you to my brothers in the Phalanx, even LJT! My foster family the STD''s and all of my HOF conductor friends. Thank you for helping me be who I am today!!
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Sometimes I forget to come back to my intro to see if there is any support going on in here. I get busy and forget a lot of things on a daily basis, I never used to forget to put a dip in every chance I got either. ONCE I got sick of her shit and put it down for good I haven't forgot to post roll everyday either. I figures if I can dip every mornING or every day why not post roll EDD. HAS the thought crossed my mind about leaving KTC? HEll yes it has! Will not lie about that at all. It was pretty recently as well. There has always been something that has kept me here though. Kind of ironic that my habit with the nic bitch always had something bringing me back to her, calling me, ensuring me that everything will be OK with her in my lip.
She is gone, I don't need nor want her anymore, I know that she is sneaky but so are all the BAQ''s in this forum. MIKE1966 put it best as we all start out strangers, reluctant to drink the kool-aid at first, shy, ashamed and even ragefully stubborn. WE give out our numbers to text or receive text from complete strangers, we join group me and have some pretty off the wall conversations. CONVERSATIONS about music, dip dreams, family, good times and heart aches. We get pissed at each other for not posting or even cause we are blunt with each other in order to keep each other accountable.
We support other groups from other years and even conduct their special occasions and milestones. We post support in other groups because members of your group have caved and started over, some do not. WE take the pesonal victories and share them amongst our new friends and they share that victory with us as we share in thiers! Every victory whether larhe or small can be huge for a bunch of strangers with one cause in common.
Do I think about leaving, yes, will I ? who knows, bUT all the things I stated above are just a few of the reasons that I keep coming back. WE are family in all kinds of ways. WE support each other and keep us on track. THANK you to everyone that always supports me and everyone else in this forum. Thank you to my brothers in the Phalanx, even LJT! My foster family the STD''s and all of my HOF conductor friends. Thank you for helping me be who I am today!!
Well said Richard. I have to say I'm proud to quit with you everyday. Glad we got to know each other in September's HOF. It's amazing how a friendship can develop over the internet. I wouldn't have thought it was possible. And congrats on your long overdue trip back home!
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Sometimes I forget to come back to my intro to see if there is any support going on in here. I get busy and forget a lot of things on a daily basis, I never used to forget to put a dip in every chance I got either. ONCE I got sick of her shit and put it down for good I haven't forgot to post roll everyday either. I figures if I can dip every mornING or every day why not post roll EDD. HAS the thought crossed my mind about leaving KTC? HEll yes it has! Will not lie about that at all. It was pretty recently as well. There has always been something that has kept me here though. Kind of ironic that my habit with the nic bitch always had something bringing me back to her, calling me, ensuring me that everything will be OK with her in my lip.
She is gone, I don't need nor want her anymore, I know that she is sneaky but so are all the BAQ''s in this forum. MIKE1966 put it best as we all start out strangers, reluctant to drink the kool-aid at first, shy, ashamed and even ragefully stubborn. WE give out our numbers to text or receive text from complete strangers, we join group me and have some pretty off the wall conversations. CONVERSATIONS about music, dip dreams, family, good times and heart aches. We get pissed at each other for not posting or even cause we are blunt with each other in order to keep each other accountable.
We support other groups from other years and even conduct their special occasions and milestones. We post support in other groups because members of your group have caved and started over, some do not. WE take the pesonal victories and share them amongst our new friends and they share that victory with us as we share in thiers! Every victory whether larhe or small can be huge for a bunch of strangers with one cause in common.
Do I think about leaving, yes, will I ? who knows, bUT all the things I stated above are just a few of the reasons that I keep coming back. WE are family in all kinds of ways. WE support each other and keep us on track. THANK you to everyone that always supports me and everyone else in this forum. Thank you to my brothers in the Phalanx, even LJT! My foster family the STD''s and all of my HOF conductor friends. Thank you for helping me be who I am today!!
If you were to leave, I'm hunting your butt down and kicking it 9 ways to Sunday all the way back!
Lover ya brother!!! I quit with you today!!!
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Sometimes I forget to come back to my intro to see if there is any support going on in here. I get busy and forget a lot of things on a daily basis, I never used to forget to put a dip in every chance I got either. ONCE I got sick of her shit and put it down for good I haven't forgot to post roll everyday either. I figures if I can dip every mornING or every day why not post roll EDD. HAS the thought crossed my mind about leaving KTC? HEll yes it has! Will not lie about that at all. It was pretty recently as well. There has always been something that has kept me here though. Kind of ironic that my habit with the nic bitch always had something bringing me back to her, calling me, ensuring me that everything will be OK with her in my lip.
She is gone, I don't need nor want her anymore, I know that she is sneaky but so are all the BAQ''s in this forum. MIKE1966 put it best as we all start out strangers, reluctant to drink the kool-aid at first, shy, ashamed and even ragefully stubborn. WE give out our numbers to text or receive text from complete strangers, we join group me and have some pretty off the wall conversations. CONVERSATIONS about music, dip dreams, family, good times and heart aches. We get pissed at each other for not posting or even cause we are blunt with each other in order to keep each other accountable.
We support other groups from other years and even conduct their special occasions and milestones. We post support in other groups because members of your group have caved and started over, some do not. WE take the pesonal victories and share them amongst our new friends and they share that victory with us as we share in thiers! Every victory whether larhe or small can be huge for a bunch of strangers with one cause in common.
Do I think about leaving, yes, will I ? who knows, bUT all the things I stated above are just a few of the reasons that I keep coming back. WE are family in all kinds of ways. WE support each other and keep us on track. THANK you to everyone that always supports me and everyone else in this forum. Thank you to my brothers in the Phalanx, even LJT! My foster family the STD''s and all of my HOF conductor friends. Thank you for helping me be who I am today!!
If you were to leave, I'm hunting your butt down and kicking it 9 ways to Sunday all the way back!
Love ya brother!!! I quit with you today!!!
Same here, and we don't have as far to travel now.
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Sometimes I forget to come back to my intro to see if there is any support going on in here. I get busy and forget a lot of things on a daily basis, I never used to forget to put a dip in every chance I got either. ONCE I got sick of her shit and put it down for good I haven't forgot to post roll everyday either. I figures if I can dip every mornING or every day why not post roll EDD. HAS the thought crossed my mind about leaving KTC? HEll yes it has! Will not lie about that at all. It was pretty recently as well. There has always been something that has kept me here though. Kind of ironic that my habit with the nic bitch always had something bringing me back to her, calling me, ensuring me that everything will be OK with her in my lip.
She is gone, I don't need nor want her anymore, I know that she is sneaky but so are all the BAQ''s in this forum. MIKE1966 put it best as we all start out strangers, reluctant to drink the kool-aid at first, shy, ashamed and even ragefully stubborn. WE give out our numbers to text or receive text from complete strangers, we join group me and have some pretty off the wall conversations. CONVERSATIONS about music, dip dreams, family, good times and heart aches. We get pissed at each other for not posting or even cause we are blunt with each other in order to keep each other accountable.
We support other groups from other years and even conduct their special occasions and milestones. We post support in other groups because members of your group have caved and started over, some do not. WE take the pesonal victories and share them amongst our new friends and they share that victory with us as we share in thiers! Every victory whether larhe or small can be huge for a bunch of strangers with one cause in common.
Do I think about leaving, yes, will I ? who knows, bUT all the things I stated above are just a few of the reasons that I keep coming back. WE are family in all kinds of ways. WE support each other and keep us on track. THANK you to everyone that always supports me and everyone else in this forum. Thank you to my brothers in the Phalanx, even LJT! My foster family the STD''s and all of my HOF conductor friends. Thank you for helping me be who I am today!!
If you were to leave, I'm hunting your butt down and kicking it 9 ways to Sunday all the way back!
Love ya brother!!! I quit with you today!!!
Same here, and we don't have as far to travel now.
I'm not going anywhere you guys. This is what I'm talking about though. Love you guys too!
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Deeper than Nicotine
The addict brain can range amongst many things from drugs obsessive compulsive disorder or even nicotine. How many people can look back and say that they have caved while trying to quit nicotine over and over and over again? Every time we cave we think itÂ’s because we are weak and that we canÂ’t handle the stress of quitting. I donÂ’t feel that is because we are weak I feel that there is deeper issues within ourselves. I even titled my hall of fame speech rising from the grips of demons for a reason. There is more to it than quitting at the weed tobacco nicotine or the urge of having an oral fixation. It is true that the nic bitch holds you down like a ball and chain like Mike1966 has mentioned many, many times before in this forum.
I have seen many people cave, I have too, many of times during my stops, this is by far the best most successful quit that IÂ’ve ever had in my life. I quit dip this time because I was sick of my jaw hurting I was over putting a dip in and taking it right out and wasting my money. I looked at my kids and I saw that every time I was spitting they were wondering what I was doing. I had Spitters in every car and almost every room in the house to include my office at work.
I started going through counseling right before I quit dip, Mrs. K and I were going through a very rough patch in our marriage at this time and we almost were getting a divorce. Something had to change drastically and immediately. Why did I start using nicotine? To be cool? To be part of the crowd? To be accepted? I think not! I was trying to fill a void, that empty space in my heart, my soul, my life. My father always made it seem like I had to be perfect in every aspect of my life so I was always trying to be perfect. News flash Richard! you cannot be perfect, nobody can be perfect, and running your life like that is going to do nothing but ruin it. I was sexually abused by the neighborhood boy up the street and a strange man at the swimming pool One Summer. Compiled with daddy issues not being accepted in school being an outcast my Depression started to rise I had nowhere else to turn, my friends were bad influences, I was a follower, I was weak, I need to be part of something.
I started to smoke, I thought it was cool, it was filling that void, or so I thought. Counseling has taught me a lot, I started working on my inner demons, my marriage has gotten better, me being a father has gotten better, I have quit dip and I do not ever look in my rearview mirror for it anymore other than to realize that it can still sneak up on me. I donÂ’t need that to fill a void in my life anymore, I have my family and that is fill enough. I have my life, I have all my friends, life is good, life is better, life without dip.
It wasnÂ’t until recently when I was watching all the people in March November October December January going through all the rage that we went through in our group of July and I started to realize with all the cavers and all the stressful situations, deaths, miscarriages, deployments, that compiling another problem on top of those will never be successful. When I realized that my mental state and I had to face all my inner demons I realized that is what was holding me back with quitting dip. it was all she wrote, it was Off to the Races and there I was living my life to the newest chapter. Just remember it is always deeper than just the nic. find that root cause and work on that and itÂ’ll help you be successful in your quit reach out help each other, help you. We all have stories like this, we all walk in each otherÂ’s shoes, just in our own way. All we need to do is quit for these 24 hours and these 24 hours alone, it is that easy.
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Deeper than Nicotine
The addict brain can range amongst many things from drugs obsessive compulsive disorder or even nicotine. How many people can look back and say that they have caved while trying to quit nicotine over and over and over again? Every time we cave we think itÂ’s because we are weak and that we canÂ’t handle the stress of quitting. I donÂ’t feel that is because we are weak I feel that there is deeper issues within ourselves. I even titled my hall of fame speech rising from the grips of demons for a reason. There is more to it than quitting at the weed tobacco nicotine or the urge of having an oral fixation. It is true that the neck bitch hold you down like a ball and chain like Mike1966 has mentioned many many times before in this forum.
I have seen many people cave I have too, many of times during my quits, this is by far the best most successful quit that IÂ’ve ever had in my life. I quit dip this time because I was sick of my jaw hurting I was over putting a dip in and taking it right out and wasting my money. I look at my kids and I saw that every time I was spitting they were wondering what I was doing I had Spitters in every car and almost every room in the house to include my office at work.
I started going through counseling right before I quit dip mrs.K and I were going through a very rough patch in our marriage at this time and we almost were getting a divorce. Something had to change drastically and immediately. Why did I start using nicotine? To be cool? To be part of the crowd? To be accepted? I think not I was trying to fill a void that empty space in my heart my soul my life my father always made it seem like I had to be perfect in every aspect of my life so I was always trying to be perfect. News flash Richard! you cannot be perfect nobody can be perfect and running your life like that is going to do nothing but ruin it. I was sexually abused by the neighborhood boy up the street and a strange man at the swimming pool One Summer. Compiled with daddy issues not being accepted in school being an outcast my Depression started to rise I had nowhere else to turn my friends were bad influences I was a follower I was weak I need to be part of something.
I started to smoke I thought it was cool it was filling that void so I thought. Counseling has taught me a lot I started working on my inner demons my marriage has gotten better me being a father has gotten better I have quit dip and I do not ever look in my rearview mirror for it anymore other than to realize that it can still sneak up on me. I donÂ’t need that to fill a void in my life anymore I have my family and that is fill enough. I have my life I have all my friends life is good life is better life without dip.
It wasnÂ’t until recently when I was watching all the people in March November October December January going through all the rage that we went through in our group of July and I started to realize with all the cavers and all the stressful situations deaths miscarriages deployments that compiling another problem on top of those will never be successful. And when I realized that my mental state and I had to face all my inner demons is what was holding me back quitting dip. it was all she wrote, it was Off to the Races and there I was living my life to the newest chapter. Just remember it is always deeper than just the nic. find that root cause and work on that and itÂ’ll help you be successful in your quit reach out help each other, help you.
Very well put Richard. Thanks for sharing. You're the real deal.
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Deeper than Nicotine
The addict brain can range amongst many things from drugs obsessive compulsive disorder or even nicotine. How many people can look back and say that they have caved while trying to quit nicotine over and over and over again? Every time we cave we think itÂ’s because we are weak and that we canÂ’t handle the stress of quitting. I donÂ’t feel that is because we are weak I feel that there is deeper issues within ourselves. I even titled my hall of fame speech rising from the grips of demons for a reason. There is more to it than quitting at the weed tobacco nicotine or the urge of having an oral fixation. It is true that the neck bitch hold you down like a ball and chain like Mike1966 has mentioned many many times before in this forum.
I have seen many people cave I have too, many of times during my quits, this is by far the best most successful quit that IÂ’ve ever had in my life. I quit dip this time because I was sick of my jaw hurting I was over putting a dip in and taking it right out and wasting my money. I look at my kids and I saw that every time I was spitting they were wondering what I was doing I had Spitters in every car and almost every room in the house to include my office at work.
I started going through counseling right before I quit dip mrs.K and I were going through a very rough patch in our marriage at this time and we almost were getting a divorce. Something had to change drastically and immediately. Why did I start using nicotine? To be cool? To be part of the crowd? To be accepted? I think not I was trying to fill a void that empty space in my heart my soul my life my father always made it seem like I had to be perfect in every aspect of my life so I was always trying to be perfect. News flash Richard! you cannot be perfect nobody can be perfect and running your life like that is going to do nothing but ruin it. I was sexually abused by the neighborhood boy up the street and a strange man at the swimming pool One Summer. Compiled with daddy issues not being accepted in school being an outcast my Depression started to rise I had nowhere else to turn my friends were bad influences I was a follower I was weak I need to be part of something.
I started to smoke I thought it was cool it was filling that void so I thought. Counseling has taught me a lot I started working on my inner demons my marriage has gotten better me being a father has gotten better I have quit dip and I do not ever look in my rearview mirror for it anymore other than to realize that it can still sneak up on me. I donÂ’t need that to fill a void in my life anymore I have my family and that is fill enough. I have my life I have all my friends life is good life is better life without dip.
It wasnÂ’t until recently when I was watching all the people in March November October December January going through all the rage that we went through in our group of July and I started to realize with all the cavers and all the stressful situations deaths miscarriages deployments that compiling another problem on top of those will never be successful. And when I realized that my mental state and I had to face all my inner demons is what was holding me back quitting dip. it was all she wrote, it was Off to the Races and there I was living my life to the newest chapter. Just remember it is always deeper than just the nic. find that root cause and work on that and itÂ’ll help you be successful in your quit reach out help each other, help you.
Wow, Richard. That is some deep shit. I quit with you today. Thank you for everything youÂ’ve done for me and the rest of us in September.
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Awesome job making it to the 3rd floor and helping so many others (myself included) on the way! Proud to Quit with you everyday! Congrats on 300!
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Awesome job making it to the 3rd floor and helping so many others (myself included) on the way! Proud to Quit with you everyday! Congrats on 300!
I appreciate it brother. I didn't know that this place was going to have such an impact like it has. Getting to know friends like you have completely made this easier. Thanks for helping me as well brother.
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Awesome job making it to the 3rd floor and helping so many others (myself included) on the way! Proud to Quit with you everyday! Congrats on 300!
I appreciate it brother. I didn't know that this place was going to have such an impact like it has. Getting to know friends like you have completely made this easier. Thanks for helping me as well brother.
Congrats on the 300 days quit!
Great job sticking with it through it all bro.
Badassery.
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Awesome job making it to the 3rd floor and helping so many others (myself included) on the way! Proud to Quit with you everyday! Congrats on 300!
I appreciate it brother. I didn't know that this place was going to have such an impact like it has. Getting to know friends like you have completely made this easier. Thanks for helping me as well brother.
Congrats on the 300 days quit!
Great job sticking with it through it all bro.
Badassery.
I appreciate it Chica. You rock!!
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Awesome job making it to the 3rd floor and helping so many others (myself included) on the way! Proud to Quit with you everyday! Congrats on 300!
I appreciate it brother. I didn't know that this place was going to have such an impact like it has. Getting to know friends like you have completely made this easier. Thanks for helping me as well brother.
Congrats on the 300 days quit!
Great job sticking with it through it all bro.
Badassery.
I appreciate it Chica. You rock!!
Congrats on 300 man. Keep kicking ass in here!
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Awesome job making it to the 3rd floor and helping so many others (myself included) on the way! Proud to Quit with you everyday! Congrats on 300!
I appreciate it brother. I didn't know that this place was going to have such an impact like it has. Getting to know friends like you have completely made this easier. Thanks for helping me as well brother.
Congrats on the 300 days quit!
Great job sticking with it through it all bro.
Badassery.
I appreciate it Chica. You rock!!
Congrats on 300 man. Keep kicking ass in here!
3rd floor! Congratulations here's your dance bro!
'dance'
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RichK congrats on your 1 year quit!
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RichK congrats on your 1 year quit!
Congrats Richard K on the big 365!! 'party' 'party'
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RichK congrats on your 1 year quit!
Congrats Richard K on the big 365!! 'party' 'party'
I appreciate it you two!!
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RichK congrats on your 1 year quit!
Congrats Richard K on the big 365!! 'party' 'party'
I appreciate it you two!!
Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day. You're the real deal. Keep on killing it!
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RichK congrats on your 1 year quit!
Congrats Richard K on the big 365!! 'party' 'party'
I appreciate it you two!!
Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day. You're the real deal. Keep on killing it!
I appreciate it mike!! Love the fact this place has found me a friend like you.
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RichK congrats on your 1 year quit!
Congrats Richard K on the big 365!! 'party' 'party'
I appreciate it you two!!
Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day. You're the real deal. Keep on killing it!
I appreciate it mike!! Love the fact this place has found me a friend like you.
Ditto! I'll second that!
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RichK congrats on your 1 year quit!
Congrats Richard K on the big 365!! 'party' 'party'
I appreciate it you two!!
Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day. You're the real deal. Keep on killing it!
I appreciate it mike!! Love the fact this place has found me a friend like you.
Ditto! I'll second that!
One year is huge, but believe it or not there are still battles ahead.
Congrats Richard! You folks in July are rocking the quit like there's no tomorrow. And there is no tomorrow if we don't post roll.
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RichK congrats on your 1 year quit!
Congrats Richard K on the big 365!! 'party' 'party'
I appreciate it you two!!
Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day. You're the real deal. Keep on killing it!
I appreciate it mike!! Love the fact this place has found me a friend like you.
Ditto! I'll second that!
One year is huge, but believe it or not there are still battles ahead.
Congrats Richard! You folks in July are rocking the quit like there's no tomorrow. And there is no tomorrow if we don't post roll.
I like that statement. Thanks Stranger
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RichK congrats on your 1 year quit!
Congrats Richard K on the big 365!! 'party' 'party'
I appreciate it you two!!
Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day. You're the real deal. Keep on killing it!
I appreciate it mike!! Love the fact this place has found me a friend like you.
Ditto! I'll second that!
One year is huge, but believe it or not there are still battles ahead.
Congrats Richard! You folks in July are rocking the quit like there's no tomorrow. And there is no tomorrow if we don't post roll.
I like that statement. Thanks Stranger
Sorry I'm late been busy but congratulations my friend!
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RichK congrats on your 1 year quit!
Congrats Richard K on the big 365!! 'party' 'party'
I appreciate it you two!!
Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day. You're the real deal. Keep on killing it!
I appreciate it mike!! Love the fact this place has found me a friend like you.
Ditto! I'll second that!
One year is huge, but believe it or not there are still battles ahead.
Congrats Richard! You folks in July are rocking the quit like there's no tomorrow. And there is no tomorrow if we don't post roll.
I like that statement. Thanks Stranger
Sorry I'm late been busy but congratulations my friend!
Thanks brother, I appreciate it.
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400! Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day!
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400! Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day!
I appreciate it brother!!
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400! Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day!
I appreciate it brother!!
400 is badass! Nice work, dude!
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400! Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day!
I appreciate it brother!!
400 is badass! Nice work, dude!
I appreciate it!!! Feels great, but will feel better to keep going and help everyone else!
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400! Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day!
I appreciate it brother!!
400 is badass! Nice work, dude!
I appreciate it!!! Feels great, but will feel better to keep going and help everyone else!
I'm sorry I've missed all these milestones, but keep CRUSHING it Rich!
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400! Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day!
I appreciate it brother!!
400 is badass! Nice work, dude!
I appreciate it!!! Feels great, but will feel better to keep going and help everyone else!
I'm sorry I've missed all these milestones, but keep CRUSHING it Rich!
Your good bro, Thanks!!!
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400! Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day!
I appreciate it brother!!
400 is badass! Nice work, dude!
I appreciate it!!! Feels great, but will feel better to keep going and help everyone else!
I'm sorry I've missed all these milestones, but keep CRUSHING it Rich!
Your good bro, Thanks!!!
Awesome job, Chief!! Proud to be quit with you.
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400! Nice job Rich. Proud to Quit with you every day!
I appreciate it brother!!
400 is badass! Nice work, dude!
I appreciate it!!! Feels great, but will feel better to keep going and help everyone else!
I'm sorry I've missed all these milestones, but keep CRUSHING it Rich!
Your good bro, Thanks!!!
Awesome job, Chief!! Proud to be quit with you.
Wow! You're killing it, continue on!
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Four. Hundred.
You're in the sweet spot, bro. Freedom really expands from this point. Enjoy it!
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Four. Hundred.
You're in the sweet spot, bro. Freedom really expands from this point. Enjoy it!
Very cool mister. Congrats.
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This article has hit home to me and has completely changed my views on how to handle cavers!!!
Here is why cavers get the treatment they do – being quit is a choice. Things get bad? Sweat it out, sac up, get into chat, get on the phone, and stay quit. Whatever it takes.
There is NO good excuse for caving. People have stayed quit when their children have died, people have stayed quit through divorce, marriage, drunken binges, Super Bowl parties, and every other situation you can imagine.
If you fail, its not because someone else didn’t answer the phone or support you – it because YOU chose to fail. Tobacco cant drive your car to the c-store, it cant buy itself, and it cant pack you lip for you. By taking all the above steps, you have crapped all over the people who have stood side by side with you for however long and promised “nothing that happens to me today can make me go back to using nicotine.”
We know this is hard. We know with ever fiber of our beings what the rage, craves, sleepless nights, funks, and all the other shitty symptoms feel like. More importantly, we know they will pass. Cancer will NOT. We know this is life and death, and when someone chooses death it hurts us a little bit more. When someone with a lot of days behind them slips back to the can, it can cause all sorts of shit with a group. It burns out those who have supported and makes them feel stabbed in the back.
However, all of it serves a purpose – that purpose is to get the caver to realize what mistakes they made, identify why they made them, and develop a plan to prevent them from happening again. This is not a site for coddling failure or weak resolve – this is a site for saving lives.
Watch though what happens once someone does show they see what went wrong and executes a plan to fix it. There are some BADASS quitters on this site that HAVE caved, did the necessary self evaluation, and now are living proof that the methodology works. If you cant handle a little online ruff-housing, my gut tells me that quitting nicotine is gonna flat out whup your ass (again).
There is a place for those that do not want what KTC provides. That way may work for others, but when you sign up here all the bullshit and excuses go out the window. We are addicts, we speak the same language.
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RichK...mighty fine 1/2 dangle you got there!
Cheers to 501 and up.
Thanks for moderaring these halls brother.
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RichK...mighty fine 1/2 dangle you got there!
Cheers to 501 and up.
Thanks for moderaring these halls brother.
Awesome job Rich. Congrats on 500!
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RichK...mighty fine 1/2 dangle you got there!
Cheers to 501 and up.
Thanks for moderaring these halls brother.
Awesome job Rich. Congrats on 500!
500 is awesome, enjoy the day!
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RichK...mighty fine 1/2 dangle you got there!
Cheers to 501 and up.
Thanks for moderaring these halls brother.
Awesome job Rich. Congrats on 500!
500 is awesome, enjoy the day!
Congrats on 500!
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RichK...mighty fine 1/2 dangle you got there!
Cheers to 501 and up.
Thanks for moderaring these halls brother.
Awesome job Rich. Congrats on 500!
500 is awesome, enjoy the day!
Congrats on 500!
Thanks everyone!! I appreciate all the support
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I truly hope my quit didn't start one day to late. I have put it off and put it off. Like many of you, I quit and my wife was so happy that I did. When I fell off the first time and my wife found out she was, to say the least, hurt (and PISSED) that I had lied to her. I made a promise then that I would NEVER dip again. When I fell off the second time I knew what would be at risk. I ran the risk of losing the two most important people in my life, my wife and 4 year old daughter. Not for dipping but for breaking my wife's trust and her heart. Yesterday she found out I was dipping again and as I write this I just hope it isn't too late. Before I believe I "quit" for my wife and her happiness but now regardless of what happens I quit for me because this addiction has caused me more pain and sorrow than any one thing in my whole life.
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I truly hope my quit didn't start one day to late. I have put it off and put it off. Like many of you, I quit and my wife was so happy that I did. When I fell off the first time and my wife found out she was, to say the least, hurt (and PISSED) that I had lied to her. I made a promise then that I would NEVER dip again. When I fell off the second time I knew what would be at risk. I ran the risk of losing the two most important people in my life, my wife and 4 year old daughter. Not for dipping but for breaking my wife's trust and her heart. Yesterday she found out I was dipping again and as I write this I just hope it isn't too late. Before I believe I "quit" for my wife and her happiness but now regardless of what happens I quit for me because this addiction has caused me more pain and sorrow than any one thing in my whole life.
Hey Sawyer, not sure if you're aware, but you posted in another guy's intro. If you want to start your own thread, click "New Topic" at the bottom of the Introductions page. Don't worry about it, this site can take some time to figure out and it happens all the time.
Anyway, welcome to KTC. This site can be a great resource in your quit. The backbone of the system here is "Posting Roll." Roll is a daily promise not to use any nicotine product. You make that promise in your Quit Group first thing, every day. Your group is December 2017 (http://forum.killthecan.org/topic/30321153/116/#new). Everyone in that group will have a quit date in the same range as you. It's a great place to not only make your promise, but to connect with others going through the same thing you are.
I'm sorry about the situation with your wife. As addicts, most of us have hurt the people we love in favor of fulfilling our addiction. You aren't the only one who has risked a marriage because of dipping. I don't know your situation, but I do know that this site can keep you quit and will provide a verifiable record of your quit. You will track your days and make that promise every day. You will have something that you can show to your wife that proves you are quit.
Addiction is a bitch man. It doesn't mean you're a bad person, but it also doesn't negate how your behavior affects those around you. Using this site won't cure addiction, but it can help make you Quit. You can free yourself and become a former user. It's worth it man, find your group and start posting roll. Freedom is achievable and it's worth it.
Let me know if I can help with anything.
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RichK hits 6th floor!
Well earned well done.
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RichK hits 6th floor!
Well earned well done.
Congrats sir!!! Proud to be quit with you today! 'party'
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RichK hits 6th floor!
Well earned well done.
Congrats sir!!! Proud to be quit with you today! 'party'
Thanks guys!! I appreciate it!
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RichK hits 6th floor!
Well earned well done.
Congrats sir!!! Proud to be quit with you today! 'party'
Thanks guys!! I appreciate it!
Congratulations Man!!!!!
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2 YEARS!!!
Great quit!!! And thanks for all you do to make KTC what it is!!!
'party2'
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2 YEARS!!!
Great quit!!! And thanks for all you do to make KTC what it is!!!
'party2'
Congrats brother! 'worship'
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2 YEARS!!!
Great quit!!! And thanks for all you do to make KTC what it is!!!
'party2'
Congrats brother! 'worship'
Well done man, thanks for the support along the way and keep kicking ass! 2 YEARS NO NICOTINE!!! 'clap'
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2 YEARS!!!
Great quit!!! And thanks for all you do to make KTC what it is!!!
'party2'
Congrats brother! 'worship'
Well done man, thanks for the support along the way and keep kicking ass! 2 YEARS NO NICOTINE!!! 'clap'
Thank you everyone! I appreciate you all
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2 YEARS!!!
Great quit!!! And thanks for all you do to make KTC what it is!!!
'party2'
Congrats brother! 'worship'
Well done man, thanks for the support along the way and keep kicking ass! 2 YEARS NO NICOTINE!!! 'clap'
Thank you everyone! I appreciate you all
Congratulations sir!
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Quitters-
Before you cave I want you to think about a few things. As I sit here at day 900 thinking back at what is was like to go through the fog of quitting I hear the news of another brother who has failed. It hurts me to the core to hear this because of everything that is available in this site, the support and everything that has gone on in my life the last few months.
Look around you guys, there are so many stories and scenarios of people on this site who have succumbed to Cancer! We have many members right now who are suffering from the disease that does not differentiate race, ethnicity, white or blue collar and even sex. They go to Chemo or radiation all the time to try and prevent the disease from taking over. Hell!! We have a section for Eternal quitters that have passed on, now not all of them to Cancer but most.
In April of this year my father was diagnosed with Colon Cancer and had surgery to remove it on May 17th. With any surgery there have been issues that have come up to include sepsis, MRSA, ileostomy bag, weight loss from over 200lbs to 130lbs. He has had over four surgeries to correct all the complications from not only the Cancer but the surgeries as well. He has had two collapsed lungs, two tubes inserted into his lungs three times to drain blood and other fluids. Has been fed through tubes, bed sores and a tube inserted into the bed sore to drain. He canÂ’t walk because he is so week and relies on my mother and a nurse to take care of him. All of this before he even goes through the 6 to 8 weeks of chemo he is scheduled to go through to try and get rid of the cancer on his lungs.
My father just recently turned 72 and was the pillar of health and to the family. He was a work horse all the way up until his surgery. He never stopped and always was working on the house, cars, helping other people out. He was boisterous and outgoing, a strong man that I look up to all the time. Now he is week and in no way looks like the man he was just a few months ago. We pray every day for his improvement but it looks bleak to say the least.
This came out of nowhere!! Cancer knocked on the door and is slowly taking my father and has taken friends of mine, to include people on this site. Cancer does not give a shit that we love him! Cancer does not give a shit that he still has things to finish for our mother! Cancer does not care that he was a strong man who fought in Vietnam and lived through that!
CANCER DOES NOT GIVE A FUCK!!!
So before you cave!
Think about this!
Ponder on this!
Visualize yourself going through this!
Visualize your family going through this!
Is it worth your life to put that shit back in your lip and assist Cancer in taking your life! Do not give it another reason to take you!
I quit with every single one of you bad ass quitters! For today! Tomorrow is another day!
Richard K
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Attaboy Richard! Congratulations
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Congrats on 900 my friend. Thanks for all that you do!
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Nice work on 900
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Quitters-
Before you cave I want you to think about a few things. As I sit here at day 1241 thinking back at what is was like to go through the fog of quitting I hear news of brothers and or sisters who have failed. It hurts me to the core to hear this because of everything that is available in this site, the support and everything that has gone on in my life the last year.
Look around you guys, there are so many stories and scenarios of people on this site who have succumbed to Cancer! We have many members right now who are suffering from the disease that does not differentiate race, ethnicity, white or blue collar and even sex. They go to Chemo or radiation all the time to try and prevent the disease from taking over. Hell!! We have a section for Eternal quitters that have passed on, now not all of them to Cancer but most.
In April of last year my father was diagnosed with Colon Cancer and had surgery to remove it on May 17th of the same year. With any surgery there were issues that came up to include sepsis, MRSA, ileostomy bag, weight loss from over 200lbs to 130lbs. He had over four surgeries to correct all the complications from not only the Cancer but the surgeries as well. He had two collapsed lungs, two tubes inserted into his lungs three times to drain blood and other fluids. Was fed through tubes, bed sores and a tube inserted into the bed sore to drain. He wasn't able walk because he was so week and relied on my mother and a nurse to take care of him.
Since he had so many surgeries to correct the mistakes from the previous surgeries he as unable to have the Chemo that he needed. For awhile he actually had a clean bill of health, had the bag removed and even started to gain some weight back. However, this past summer, he had to get some procedures done. Pet scan, biopsy, CT scan. Because of constant kidney stones and many other symptoms he was coming down with. So, the Oncologist in the VA was worried about him so she put him in for the tests. Well, she called back and informed my parents that the Cancer is stage 4 metastasized in is abdomen, pancreas, spots on his lungs and spread to his lymph nodes and he needs to start chemotherapy right away.
He is going to have to have a stent put in and will have to start a 48 hour Chemo session starting on Tuesdays and going back in on Thursdays to have it taken out. This will continue from now until he decides to be done with it.
He'll be on two types of drugs at first, then they'll switch it to just one of them. However, since he has the kidney damage from everything that happened within the past year they have to be careful which ones they do and what chemo they have to give him
As of right now the doctors are saying that there is no good outcome in this case. They said there is no beating it just a way to keep it in check, and that he has roughly 6 to 18 months to live depending if does chemo or not.
Now, since dad and mom missed their annual trip to Aruba last year he told the oncologist that his chemo will have to wait until after that. They go every year for their anniversary in August. The oncologist is pissed but he told her if it is gonna take him, he is going to go out with a bang.
My father just recently turned 73 and was the pillar of health and to the family. He was a work horse all the way up until his surgery. He never stopped and always was working on the house, cars, helping other people out. He was boisterous and outgoing, a strong man that I look up to all the time. Now he is week and in no way looks like the man he was just last year. We pray every day for his improvement but it looks bleak to say the least.
This came out of nowhere!! Cancer knocked on the door and is slowly taking my father and has taken friends of mine, to include people on this site. Cancer does not give a shit that we love him! Cancer does not give a shit that he still has things to finish for our mother! Cancer does not care that he was a strong man who fought in Vietnam and lived through that!
CANCER DOES NOT GIVE A FUCK!!!
So before you cave!
Think about this!
Ponder on this!
Visualize yourself going through this!
Visualize your family going through this!
Is it worth your life to put that shit back in your lip and assist Cancer in taking your life! Do not give it another reason to take you!
I quit with every single one of you bad ass quitters! For today! Tomorrow is another day!
Richard K
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FUCK CANCER!!!
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Second that, FUCK CANCER!!!
TeamPinkFuckCancer(TPFC)
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Yeah, damnit, fuck it.
Prayers going up for you, your dad and the family, Richard.