KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: beartrapper on July 10, 2013, 12:30:00 PM
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Well, here I am. Clearly should have done this a long time ago. I am afraid I am too late. I noticed some wierd swelling in my neck under my ear on the mastoid bone and it hurt a tad. Then other lymph nodes swelled up and I figured I had a cold. Buts its summer time..... but I kept on dipping. Then I had troulbe swallowing. It felt like I had something in my throat all the time. Then yesterday I am having jaw pain and my teeth feel loose. Basically every symptom that you can have for throat or oral cancer. This has been going on for over 2 weeks now.
So I made an appt with oral surgeon but I feel so stupid. I have "quit" before and usually it only last a couple days or hours even, with the "just one more" mentality. I have been scared about my health before, but as soon as the worrisome signs went away, I went right back to dipping.
Now I am screwed. I have looked at every symptom on the Interenet possible for swelling of the mastoid, jaw soreness, trouble swallowing and the only thing it could be a is a cancer of some type . I am so stupid. I feel like crying and I can't tell my wife or parents or anyone so I am just floating through the day here until Friday appointment day.
Background on myself here. I am 33 and started dipping when I was 17 or 18. Dipped in college and started smoking as well, and was more of a smoker than dipper during that time but really did both. Then I quit smoking in 2007 and just occasiaonly smoke when I drink or on fishing trips. I dip quit a bit though, usually a can every 1 1/2 days. My mouth gets tore up so I move it around, bottom, top, middle of both sides. I never want to look at my mouth because then it would make me quit, if that makes sense.
Now I might really have screwed this up. I have a 4 year old girl, a 2 1/2 year old son and my wife is 6 months pregnant, due in August. What in the WORLD AM I DOING USING TOBACCO??? So stupid. I feel like an idiot, when just 2 weeks ago I would pop in a chew with no thought whatsoever.
I don't have any life insurance and my wife stays home with the kids. I have a good job, but how am I going to work and provide for my family if I am going through some kind of brutal cancer treatment. Am I going to really die? Am I really going to go and get diagnosed with some type of horrible lymphoma?
Also, I am the process of getting a new job. Have another interview next week hopefully and what am I supposed to do? Do I tell my new job that I have freaking cancer? What a disaster.
So I am a 33 year old dipper with very little savings, looking for a new job, with 2 kids and a baby and I just wrecked it all? Is this really happening?
Regardless, I somehow managed to still dip during this emotional crisis. I have bot 6 cans and done one chew out of them before throwing them away, once again convinced I have cancer. I quit again yesterday at 8am and and now 28 hours in. Using Smokey Mountain to curb the itch, but I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit. "
Any thoughts welcome. I will post roll as well once I figure out how to do it.
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Well, here I am. Clearly should have done this a long time ago. I am afraid I am too late. I noticed some wierd swelling in my neck under my ear on the mastoid bone and it hurt a tad. Then other lymph nodes swelled up and I figured I had a cold. Buts its summer time..... but I kept on dipping. Then I had troulbe swallowing. It felt like I had something in my throat all the time. Then yesterday I am having jaw pain and my teeth feel loose. Basically every symptom that you can have for throat or oral cancer. This has been going on for over 2 weeks now.
So I made an appt with oral surgeon but I feel so stupid. I have "quit" before and usually it only last a couple days or hours even, with the "just one more" mentality. I have been scared about my health before, but as soon as the worrisome signs went away, I went right back to dipping.
Now I am screwed. I have looked at every symptom on the Interenet possible for swelling of the mastoid, jaw soreness, trouble swallowing and the only thing it could be a is a cancer of some type . I am so stupid. I feel like crying and I can't tell my wife or parents or anyone so I am just floating through the day here until Friday appointment day.
Background on myself here. I am 33 and started dipping when I was 17 or 18. Dipped in college and started smoking as well, and was more of a smoker than dipper during that time but really did both. Then I quit smoking in 2007 and just occasiaonly smoke when I drink or on fishing trips. I dip quit a bit though, usually a can every 1 1/2 days. My mouth gets tore up so I move it around, bottom, top, middle of both sides. I never want to look at my mouth because then it would make me quit, if that makes sense.
Now I might really have screwed this up. I have a 4 year old girl, a 2 1/2 year old son and my wife is 6 months pregnant, due in August. What in the WORLD AM I DOING USING TOBACCO??? So stupid. I feel like an idiot, when just 2 weeks ago I would pop in a chew with no thought whatsoever.
I don't have any life insurance and my wife stays home with the kids. I have a good job, but how am I going to work and provide for my family if I am going through some kind of brutal cancer treatment. Am I going to really die? Am I really going to go and get diagnosed with some type of horrible lymphoma?
Also, I am the process of getting a new job. Have another interview next week hopefully and what am I supposed to do? Do I tell my new job that I have freaking cancer? What a disaster.
So I am a 33 year old dipper with very little savings, looking for a new job, with 2 kids and a baby and I just wrecked it all? Is this really happening?
Regardless, I somehow managed to still dip during this emotional crisis. I have bot 6 cans and done one chew out of them before throwing them away, once again convinced I have cancer. I quit again yesterday at 8am and and now 28 hours in. Using Smokey Mountain to curb the itch, but I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit. "
Any thoughts welcome. I will post roll as well once I figure out how to do it.
Ok. You are scared to death and are dealing with a lot.
Lets make this easy.
1 problem + nicotine = 2 problems.
Lets focus on what you can control, nicotine. Hit the welcome center link: index.php?showforum=13 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showforum=13)
and read it. Read it again. Then execute. Focus on today only. No matter if you are sick or not, stop the stupidity today. This site has the tools to make it happen. The choice is yours.
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Well, here I am. Clearly should have done this a long time ago. I am afraid I am too late. I noticed some wierd swelling in my neck under my ear on the mastoid bone and it hurt a tad. Then other lymph nodes swelled up and I figured I had a cold. Buts its summer time..... but I kept on dipping. Then I had troulbe swallowing. It felt like I had something in my throat all the time. Then yesterday I am having jaw pain and my teeth feel loose. Basically every symptom that you can have for throat or oral cancer. This has been going on for over 2 weeks now.
So I made an appt with oral surgeon but I feel so stupid. I have "quit" before and usually it only last a couple days or hours even, with the "just one more" mentality. I have been scared about my health before, but as soon as the worrisome signs went away, I went right back to dipping.
Now I am screwed. I have looked at every symptom on the Interenet possible for swelling of the mastoid, jaw soreness, trouble swallowing and the only thing it could be a is a cancer of some type . I am so stupid. I feel like crying and I can't tell my wife or parents or anyone so I am just floating through the day here until Friday appointment day.
Background on myself here. I am 33 and started dipping when I was 17 or 18. Dipped in college and started smoking as well, and was more of a smoker than dipper during that time but really did both. Then I quit smoking in 2007 and just occasiaonly smoke when I drink or on fishing trips. I dip quit a bit though, usually a can every 1 1/2 days. My mouth gets tore up so I move it around, bottom, top, middle of both sides. I never want to look at my mouth because then it would make me quit, if that makes sense.
Now I might really have screwed this up. I have a 4 year old girl, a 2 1/2 year old son and my wife is 6 months pregnant, due in August. What in the WORLD AM I DOING USING TOBACCO??? So stupid. I feel like an idiot, when just 2 weeks ago I would pop in a chew with no thought whatsoever.
I don't have any life insurance and my wife stays home with the kids. I have a good job, but how am I going to work and provide for my family if I am going through some kind of brutal cancer treatment. Am I going to really die? Am I really going to go and get diagnosed with some type of horrible lymphoma?
Also, I am the process of getting a new job. Have another interview next week hopefully and what am I supposed to do? Do I tell my new job that I have freaking cancer? What a disaster.
So I am a 33 year old dipper with very little savings, looking for a new job, with 2 kids and a baby and I just wrecked it all? Is this really happening?
Regardless, I somehow managed to still dip during this emotional crisis. I have bot 6 cans and done one chew out of them before throwing them away, once again convinced I have cancer. I quit again yesterday at 8am and and now 28 hours in. Using Smokey Mountain to curb the itch, but I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit. "
Any thoughts welcome. I will post roll as well once I figure out how to do it.
You are in the right place. I am going to PM you my number, call me or txt me and I will walk you through Posting.
This place is a life-saver. But YOU have to put the work in and submit yourself to REAL accountability. That's what we are all about.
My name is Phil, and I quit with you today!
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Well, here I am. Clearly should have done this a long time ago. I am afraid I am too late. I noticed some wierd swelling in my neck under my ear on the mastoid bone and it hurt a tad. Then other lymph nodes swelled up and I figured I had a cold. Buts its summer time..... but I kept on dipping. Then I had troulbe swallowing. It felt like I had something in my throat all the time. Then yesterday I am having jaw pain and my teeth feel loose. Basically every symptom that you can have for throat or oral cancer. This has been going on for over 2 weeks now.
So I made an appt with oral surgeon but I feel so stupid. I have "quit" before and usually it only last a couple days or hours even, with the "just one more" mentality. I have been scared about my health before, but as soon as the worrisome signs went away, I went right back to dipping.Â
Now I am screwed. I have looked at every symptom on the Interenet possible for swelling of the mastoid, jaw soreness, trouble swallowing and the only thing it could be a is a cancer of some type . I am so stupid. I feel like crying and I can't tell my wife or parents or anyone so I am just floating through the day here until Friday appointment day.
Background on myself here. I am 33 and started dipping when I was 17 or 18. Dipped in college and started smoking as well, and was more of a smoker than dipper during that time but really did both. Then I quit smoking in 2007 and just occasiaonly smoke when I drink or on fishing trips. I dip quit a bit though, usually a can every 1 1/2 days.  My mouth gets tore up so I move it around, bottom, top, middle of both sides. I never want to look at my mouth because then it would make me quit, if that makes sense. Â
Now I might really have screwed this up. I have a 4 year old girl, a 2 1/2 year old son and my wife is 6 months pregnant, due in August. What in the WORLD AM I DOING USING TOBACCO??? So stupid. I feel like an idiot, when just 2 weeks ago I would pop in a chew with no thought whatsoever.Â
I don't have any life insurance and my wife stays home with the kids. I have a good job, but how am I going to work and provide for my family if I am going through some kind of brutal cancer treatment. Am I going to really die? Am I really going to go and get diagnosed with some type of horrible lymphoma?
Also, I am the process of getting a new job. Have another interview next week hopefully and what am I supposed to do? Do I tell my new job that I have freaking cancer? What a disaster.Â
So I am a 33 year old dipper with very little savings, looking for a new job, with 2 kids and a baby and I just wrecked it all? Is this really happening?Â
Regardless, I somehow managed to still dip during this emotional crisis. I have bot 6 cans and done one chew out of them before throwing them away, once again convinced I have cancer. I quit again yesterday at 8am and and now 28 hours in. Using Smokey Mountain to curb the itch, but I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit. "
Any thoughts welcome. I will post roll as well once I figure out how to do it.
Ok. You are scared to death and are dealing with a lot.
Lets make this easy.
1 problem + nicotine = 2 problems.
Lets focus on what you can control, nicotine. Hit the welcome center link: index.php?showforum=13 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showforum=13)
and read it. Read it again. Then execute. Focus on today only. No matter if you are sick or not, stop the stupidity today. This site has the tools to make it happen. The choice is yours.
BearTrapper,
You have come to the right place you have people already on the way to help you. We do things one day at a time here or ODAAT like SCO just said lets focus on what we can do here and that is get you to stop using tobacco. I know you have a full plate right now so sit back and just breath right now. ODAAT bro
PM if you need my number.
T
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Well, here I am. Clearly should have done this a long time ago. I am afraid I am too late. I noticed some wierd swelling in my neck under my ear on the mastoid bone and it hurt a tad. Then other lymph nodes swelled up and I figured I had a cold. Buts its summer time..... but I kept on dipping. Then I had troulbe swallowing. It felt like I had something in my throat all the time. Then yesterday I am having jaw pain and my teeth feel loose. Basically every symptom that you can have for throat or oral cancer. This has been going on for over 2 weeks now.
So I made an appt with oral surgeon but I feel so stupid. I have "quit" before and usually it only last a couple days or hours even, with the "just one more" mentality. I have been scared about my health before, but as soon as the worrisome signs went away, I went right back to dipping.
Now I am screwed. I have looked at every symptom on the Interenet possible for swelling of the mastoid, jaw soreness, trouble swallowing and the only thing it could be a is a cancer of some type . I am so stupid. I feel like crying and I can't tell my wife or parents or anyone so I am just floating through the day here until Friday appointment day.
Background on myself here. I am 33 and started dipping when I was 17 or 18. Dipped in college and started smoking as well, and was more of a smoker than dipper during that time but really did both. Then I quit smoking in 2007 and just occasiaonly smoke when I drink or on fishing trips. I dip quit a bit though, usually a can every 1 1/2 days. My mouth gets tore up so I move it around, bottom, top, middle of both sides. I never want to look at my mouth because then it would make me quit, if that makes sense.
Now I might really have screwed this up. I have a 4 year old girl, a 2 1/2 year old son and my wife is 6 months pregnant, due in August. What in the WORLD AM I DOING USING TOBACCO??? So stupid. I feel like an idiot, when just 2 weeks ago I would pop in a chew with no thought whatsoever.
I don't have any life insurance and my wife stays home with the kids. I have a good job, but how am I going to work and provide for my family if I am going through some kind of brutal cancer treatment. Am I going to really die? Am I really going to go and get diagnosed with some type of horrible lymphoma?
Also, I am the process of getting a new job. Have another interview next week hopefully and what am I supposed to do? Do I tell my new job that I have freaking cancer? What a disaster.
So I am a 33 year old dipper with very little savings, looking for a new job, with 2 kids and a baby and I just wrecked it all? Is this really happening?
Regardless, I somehow managed to still dip during this emotional crisis. I have bot 6 cans and done one chew out of them before throwing them away, once again convinced I have cancer. I quit again yesterday at 8am and and now 28 hours in. Using Smokey Mountain to curb the itch, but I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit. "
Any thoughts welcome. I will post roll as well once I figure out how to do it.
Cried my eyes out many a time thinking I had cancer, still dream about it all the time too. Scowicks right, lets focus on quitting and stop oushing the poison in your system. There are some who have had cancer and will tell you thier first thought after being diagnosed was "I want a dip". Deal with your addiction....quit with you today.
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Well, here I am. Clearly should have done this a long time ago. I am afraid I am too late. I noticed some wierd swelling in my neck under my ear on the mastoid bone and it hurt a tad. Then other lymph nodes swelled up and I figured I had a cold. Buts its summer time..... but I kept on dipping.  Then I had troulbe swallowing. It felt like I had something in my throat all the time. Then yesterday I am having jaw pain and my teeth feel loose. Basically every symptom that you can have for throat or oral cancer.  This has been going on for over 2 weeks now.
So I made an appt with oral surgeon but I feel so stupid. I have "quit" before and usually it only last a couple days or hours even, with the "just one more" mentality. I have been scared about my health before, but as soon as the worrisome signs went away, I went right back to dipping.Â
Now I am screwed. I have looked at every symptom on the Interenet possible for swelling of the mastoid, jaw soreness, trouble swallowing and the only thing it could be a is a cancer of some type . I am so stupid. I feel like crying and I can't tell my wife or parents or anyone so I am just floating through the day here until Friday appointment day.
Background on myself here. I am 33 and started dipping when I was 17 or 18.  Dipped in college and started smoking as well, and was more of a smoker than dipper during that time but really did both. Then I quit smoking in 2007 and just occasiaonly smoke when I drink or on fishing trips.  I dip quit a bit though, usually a can every 1 1/2 days.  My mouth gets tore up so I move it around, bottom, top, middle of both sides. I never want to look at my mouth because then it would make me quit, if that makes sense. Â
Now I might really have screwed this up. I have a 4 year old girl, a 2 1/2 year old son and my wife is 6 months pregnant, due in August. What in the WORLD AM I DOING USING TOBACCO??? So stupid. I feel like an idiot, when just 2 weeks ago I would pop in a chew with no thought whatsoever.Â
I don't have any life insurance and my wife stays home with the kids. I have a good job, but how am I going to work and provide for my family if I am going through some kind of brutal cancer treatment. Am I going to really die? Am I really going to go and get diagnosed with some type of horrible lymphoma?
Also, I am the process of getting a new job. Have another interview next week hopefully and what am I supposed to do?  Do I tell my new job that I have freaking cancer? What a disaster.Â
So I am a 33 year old dipper with very little savings, looking for a new job, with 2 kids and a baby and I just wrecked it all? Is this really happening? Â
Regardless, I somehow managed to still dip during this emotional crisis. I have bot 6 cans and done one chew out of them before throwing them away, once again convinced I have cancer. I quit again yesterday at 8am and and now 28 hours in. Using Smokey Mountain to curb the itch, but I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit. "
Any thoughts welcome. I will post roll as well once I figure out how to do it.
Ok. You are scared to death and are dealing with a lot.
Lets make this easy.
1 problem + nicotine = 2 problems.
Lets focus on what you can control, nicotine. Hit the welcome center link: index.php?showforum=13 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showforum=13)
and read it. Read it again. Then execute. Focus on today only. No matter if you are sick or not, stop the stupidity today. This site has the tools to make it happen. The choice is yours.
BearTrapper,
You have come to the right place you have people already on the way to help you. We do things one day at a time here or ODAAT like SCO just said lets focus on what we can do here and that is get you to stop using tobacco. I know you have a full plate right now so sit back and just breath right now. ODAAT bro
PM if you need my number.
T
I can't really add to what's been said. Keep your focus on the one thing you can control: abstaining from nicotine. We can help you with that. We'd LOVE to help you with that. Toss every bit of nicotine in every form, even the stash in your golf bag, and kick that "I already have cancer so who cares" mentality right out. Go to the doctor on Friday. Hope. Pray. Whatever you need to do to cope with the things that you CANNOT control. But grab the reins on your addiction and get nicotine out of your life. As Sco said, start with the Welcome Center.
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Well, here I am. Clearly should have done this a long time ago. I am afraid I am too late. I noticed some wierd swelling in my neck under my ear on the mastoid bone and it hurt a tad. Then other lymph nodes swelled up and I figured I had a cold. Buts its summer time..... but I kept on dipping. Then I had troulbe swallowing. It felt like I had something in my throat all the time. Then yesterday I am having jaw pain and my teeth feel loose. Basically every symptom that you can have for throat or oral cancer. This has been going on for over 2 weeks now.
So I made an appt with oral surgeon but I feel so stupid. I have "quit" before and usually it only last a couple days or hours even, with the "just one more" mentality. I have been scared about my health before, but as soon as the worrisome signs went away, I went right back to dipping.
Now I am screwed. I have looked at every symptom on the Interenet possible for swelling of the mastoid, jaw soreness, trouble swallowing and the only thing it could be a is a cancer of some type . I am so stupid. I feel like crying and I can't tell my wife or parents or anyone so I am just floating through the day here until Friday appointment day.
Background on myself here. I am 33 and started dipping when I was 17 or 18. Dipped in college and started smoking as well, and was more of a smoker than dipper during that time but really did both. Then I quit smoking in 2007 and just occasiaonly smoke when I drink or on fishing trips. I dip quit a bit though, usually a can every 1 1/2 days. My mouth gets tore up so I move it around, bottom, top, middle of both sides. I never want to look at my mouth because then it would make me quit, if that makes sense.
Now I might really have screwed this up. I have a 4 year old girl, a 2 1/2 year old son and my wife is 6 months pregnant, due in August. What in the WORLD AM I DOING USING TOBACCO??? So stupid. I feel like an idiot, when just 2 weeks ago I would pop in a chew with no thought whatsoever.
I don't have any life insurance and my wife stays home with the kids. I have a good job, but how am I going to work and provide for my family if I am going through some kind of brutal cancer treatment. Am I going to really die? Am I really going to go and get diagnosed with some type of horrible lymphoma?
Also, I am the process of getting a new job. Have another interview next week hopefully and what am I supposed to do? Do I tell my new job that I have freaking cancer? What a disaster.
So I am a 33 year old dipper with very little savings, looking for a new job, with 2 kids and a baby and I just wrecked it all? Is this really happening?
Regardless, I somehow managed to still dip during this emotional crisis. I have bot 6 cans and done one chew out of them before throwing them away, once again convinced I have cancer. I quit again yesterday at 8am and and now 28 hours in. Using Smokey Mountain to curb the itch, but I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit. "
Any thoughts welcome. I will post roll as well once I figure out how to do it.
Do you have cancer? Maybe! But the odds are in favor that it is something else! You have to be careful looking online at symptoms! It makes you see everything. It makes you start rubbing your neck and jaw to check for swelling, and even doing that a little can start making your neck and jaw sore.... So then you become convinced of symptoms. My doctor ordered me to stop looking online cause I was making myself crazy. Then the symptoms went away. The mind is a powerful thing. It is summer but I just had a week long sinus infection that made my throat sore and face hurt.... The season does not matter! You need to relax until you go to the doctor! It can be 100 different things. Don't stress about what you can't control at the moment! As far as quitting... THAT you can control this moment! Its a minute, by hour by day commitment that you CAN control! Quit now and then on Friday when you get a clean bill of health you will be that much happier! You will get peace and be over the Nicotine addiction as it has left your body after 72 hrs! This needs to be done for you and not out of fear or for others like your kids or wife. They can motivate you but they cannot be the reason! This is a lifelong addiction and it will take YOUR will power not theirs! I am glad you are here and I will help in anyway I can. Send me a PM and I will give you my number! I quit once for the same fear you are going through right now, and I urge you to quit for more then fear. When you get a clean bill of health it is not an excuse to go back to dipping. It's the opposite! A reason to continue in the best decision you have ever made!
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This roller coaster ride blows man. The "highs" so high that dippin' makes sense. The "lows" so low that dippin' makes sense. You get me? It never stops for us. You need to get off the ride. We can help with that bro. Your health? Just take a breath... It's probably not what you fear. It's already been said, your mind will screw you in this area. Fear and shame and worry... Running rampant, it's a bad recipe. I'm pm'ing you my number. Let's do this...
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I wondered how long it would take someone to write back and all these responses came in minutes. Appreciated. I should have done this long ago. Nice to have someone that understands.
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I agree with everything said already and can't add much aside from the fact that the human body has remarkable self-healing capabilities. Stop dignosing yourself and listen to what the pros tell you. In the meantime stop self inflicting more damage by ingesting cancerous chemicals.
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Be very careful with diagnosing yourself or allowing your mind to run wild with "what could be". I was probably the biggest hypochondriac on the planet early in my quit. I diagnosed myself with mouth cancer, throat cancer, heart problems, I think I even diagnosed myself with ovarian cancer... I would get myself so worked up about having cancer or some other fatal ailment that I would crank my anxiety to the point I would have panic attacks. I thought more than once I was having a heart attack, could not catch my breath, heart pounding, sweating, thought I was going to die.
I eneded up in the ER more than once, didn't sleep well for months, worried myself so much I puked at times. I went to the doctor so many times she actually told me to stop coming to see her. Guess what they found? NOTHING... Even when I was sure my regular doc had missed something the other docs would confirm what she said and I was not going to die with my self diagnosed illnesses.
Here I am heading into my 4th year of quit... the anxiety is gone, I no longer self diagnose, I exercise daily, I enjoy my family, I enjoy my life.
Dump the shit and get to quitting, remember how scared you are right now as it will serve you well later.
Then go to the doctor and get checked out.
STAY QUIT
Greg
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Nothing new to add other than be a Badass Quitter today.
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COULD BE ALOT OF THINGS. INFECTION, STAPH, BLOCKED SALIVARY GLAND, HYPERACTIVE LYMPH NODE, AIDS, AMONG OTHERS.
THE ONE THING YOU CAN DO RIGHT NOW IS KEEP THAT SHIT OUT OF YOUR PIE HOLE. YOU CAN DO THIS.
but I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit.
I BET THEY DO 4 year old girl, a 2 1/2 year old son and my wife is 6 months pregnant
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COULD BE ALOT OF THINGS. INFECTION, STAPH, BLOCKED SALIVARY GLAND, HYPERACTIVE LYMPH NODE, AIDS, AMONG OTHERS.
THE ONE THING YOU CAN DO RIGHT NOW IS KEEP THAT SHIT OUT OF YOUR PIE HOLE. YOU CAN DO THIS.
but I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit.
I BET THEY DO 4 year old girl, a 2 1/2 year old son and my wife is 6 months pregnant
Yeah sneaky nic bitch. You give a shit. You do. That's why you are here.
Scared straight? I honestly never feared cancer from the can. So this is a part that I really can't relate. I just realized one day that there is no point to it but I couldn't just stop it. I am addicted.
I don't like the mess, the lies, giving up sleep so that I can dip in peace. I just stoped loving it on March 14th, 2012 and KTC lead me to freedom.
Remember your addiction is speaking to you but you do give a shit and all you need to do is stay quit today and forget thinking about being quit tomorrow or forever. Just quit and keep your word when you wake and its today.
Things work out and you deal with life on life's terms. Fear and Faith cannot be present at the same time. Start believing that you can be quit today and you do give a shit.
Your addicted mind is tricky. Really sit back and ask your non addicted mind, Do you still love her and is the fear you deal with worth humping the can again? You will see the lies more clearly and knock the nic bitch out today.
Dismiss her and start believing in your quit right now!!!!! You got this and will prefer not having nicotine in your life or around your loved ones.
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I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit. "
Be very clear, it isn't you thinking that. It is the nicbitch whispering in your brain. You know you care, or, like others have said, you wouldn't be here.
You are quit for today, so figure out how you will get through. You will start to feel the pride that comes with kicking nics ass every damn day.
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I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit. "
Be very clear, it isn't you thinking that. It is the nicbitch whispering in your brain. You know you care, or, like others have said, you wouldn't be here.
You are quit for today, so figure out how you will get through. You will start to feel the pride that comes with kicking nics ass every damn day.
Damn, this is an asute comment. Spot on. This is how she works. She is one evil, clever conniving bitch.
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COULD BE ALOT OF THINGS. INFECTION, STAPH, BLOCKED SALIVARY GLAND, HYPERACTIVE LYMPH NODE, AIDS, AMONG OTHERS.
THE ONE THING YOU CAN DO RIGHT NOW IS KEEP THAT SHIT OUT OF YOUR PIE HOLE. YOU CAN DO THIS.
but I have already caught myself saying," well I already have cancer, who gives a shit.
I BET THEY DO 4 year old girl, a 2 1/2 year old son and my wife is 6 months pregnant
Yeah sneaky nic bitch. You give a shit. You do. That's why you are here.
Scared straight? I honestly never feared cancer from the can. So this is a part that I really can't relate. I just realized one day that there is no point to it but I couldn't just stop it. I am addicted.
I don't like the mess, the lies, giving up sleep so that I can dip in peace. I just stoped loving it on March 14th, 2012 and KTC lead me to freedom.
Remember your addiction is speaking to you but you do give a shit and all you need to do is stay quit today and forget thinking about being quit tomorrow or forever. Just quit and keep your word when you wake and its today.
Things work out and you deal with life on life's terms. Fear and Faith cannot be present at the same time. Start believing that you can be quit today and you do give a shit.
Your addicted mind is tricky. Really sit back and ask your non addicted mind, Do you still love her and is the fear you deal with worth humping the can again? You will see the lies more clearly and knock the nic bitch out today.
Dismiss her and start believing in your quit right now!!!!! You got this and will prefer not having nicotine in your life or around your loved ones.
bingo.
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I can't say for sure what you may or may not have going on. But I've also gone to the ENT specialist under less than ideal circumstances. Some of my symptoms were:
Enlarged lymph gland on one side of the neck, sore throat and voice hoarseness which persisted over several months, difficulty swallowing, sinus congestion/drainage on one side, and earache on one side. I felt pretty damn sure I had throat cancer.
Went to the ENT, and it wasn't cancer. As much as you can, focus on what you can control - your quit - because no matter what happens, you need to quit this shit, and take back control of what you can control.
Post roll, get everything checked out, and go from there.
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said a prayer for you, hang in there
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I started writing this and I am just kind of blabbing here. If you don't mind, I plan to just write this out like a diary or something.
Just over 48 hours of zero nicotine now. Not as bad because I have been so scared about this weird jaw swelling that I have been "quitting" for the past 2 weeks. Basically, I say "never again" and then buy a can 4 hours laters, do one dip out of it and throw it away and say "never again." Regardless, I have only had one dip a day for the past week so it makes this hard stop a bit better for know.
So last night I was getting really irritable with the kids and I thought, " I am so much more patient when I have a dip." I got frustrated because my son threw his toothbrush and hit me in the face and I got really annoyed. My wife said that she was "very disappointed in my behavior." No one knows what is really going on. I left last night and walked the dogs and went fishing. Without this site, without a doubt, I would have walked over to the gas station with the dogs and bought some chew. (Yes, within walking distance.. tought) Without a doubt. But for some reason, I didn't want to just go away from here. I didn't want to lie. I lie to everyone all the time about this stupid effing habit. I figured all the people that responded to my post yesterday would be really pissed that they got invested in my quit and life when I wasn't serious.
So I get home and was fiending really badly. My daughter had fallen asleep in our bed so I pick her up and put her in her bed and lay down and pat her back. I fell asleep in there and woke up this morning in a fog dream state. My wife said something about "what is happening. Why is there fake dip out at 6:30 in the morning. Who needs fake dip at 6:30." I said nothing.
I woke up this morning and my jaw hurts. My mastoid area behind my ear is still swollen. I just can't find anything else that it could be besides something really bad. I spend all day looking up symptoms or on this site. Shit. This feels real. Why does my jaw hurt. How can these lymphnodes or whatever they are be swollen for 3 weeks if this is just some infection? I wish I had other symptoms, like a runny nose or something.
I hate myself. I wish I could just go away.
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beartrapper,
You have a lot going on and need to realize that most of your current reasoning is coming from the "addict" that you are. You have to stop justifying the solution to your problems is having another dip. The wonderful family that you have created is reason enough to justify your "Quit" and strive to be the best father and husband you can be. This is not a time to wish you could check out because you had a hand in bringing three other individuals into this world that will depend on you for a very long time. This is the first day to make a descision that you will "Quit" this addiction and not let it affect anything else about your family.
I hope that you can step back and realize how you have reasoned that every problem you currently have is related to tobacco use.
For your family's sake, begin your Quit today and ride thru the adverse effects of the addiction realizing that you are doing this for you and it will eventually make it better for your family.
756 days ago, I was very much like you. My whole world evolved around having that tin within reach at evey moment. I could do "nothing" without a dip in my mouth. I even tried to figure out how I could get a dip while I slept so how sick was that.
Own your Quit starting today.
Honor your word every day to us that you will not use nicotine.
You can do this!!!
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Have you told your wife any of this? I tried this site before and made it 180 days and caved. I knew no one here except for one vet who pm'd me and that was it. No one at home knew. My wife had ZERO clue. I had a black belt in :ph43r: dipping. I was accountable to no one. After I fell off the radar (100 days quit) i stopped posting roll and no one noticed. What makes this time different:
I hate my life on nicotine
I told my wife on day 2 EVERYTHING
I am involved on many levels with this site
I confessed I AM AN ADDICT
I pray for God to be with me
This is my experience. Take what you will.
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Have you told your wife any of this? I tried this site before and made it 180 days and caved. I knew no one here except for one vet who pm'd me and that was it. No one at home knew. My wife had ZERO clue. I had a black belt in :ph43r: dipping. I was accountable to no one. After I fell off the radar (100 days quit) i stopped posting roll and no one noticed. What makes this time different:
I hate my life on nicotine
I told my wife on day 2 EVERYTHING
I am involved on many levels with this site
I confessed I AM AN ADDICT
I pray for God to be with me
This is my experience. Take what you will.
One of the greatest moves (Statements) in my quit was when I realized I was addicted and took the advise to come clean with my wife. I went to my wife and showed her KTC.
I told her that I always thought I could quit because I loved her and my family. Realizing I was an addict explained that I wasn't capable of quitting out of love.
I finally was sick of it and asked her to support me. I had her read the spouse section on KTC. I showed her all my hiding places for tin. I think this move instilled a belief that I finally wasn't playing around and I was serious about my quit.
Today, I can't imagine being quit and keeping her in the dark on this. I wouldn't have read a love letter she wrote me on day 100. My kids cards and having them ask me "What day are you on today?"
Almost coming to 500 days now. The cravings are a piece of cake because I involved everyone, including my kids. I tell my wife that I am craving or if I am acting strange, she lets me know that I must be on the verge of another breakthrough in my recovery. She keeps me level and strong when I am not.
My experience is positive. Its in women's nature to forgive and nurture. Give her the opportunity to hold your hand in this.....
Also what if she finds out anyway? I think if she finds out, she will be more hurt that you didn't come to her and involve her. Seriously, if she had a struggle, how would you feel if she kept you in the dark?
If you think a confession and asking for support is a relationship breaker...not coming clean is a lie and your relationship has no foundation of truth to stand on.
May sound harsh but test your marriage by making it founded on facts and truth. You'll be glad you did.
If you do or don't it wont impact me either way. Just sharing my experience to a fellow brother in quit.
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Have you told your wife any of this? I tried this site before and made it 180 days and caved. I knew no one here except for one vet who pm'd me and that was it. No one at home knew. My wife had ZERO clue. I had a black belt in :ph43r: dipping. I was accountable to no one. After I fell off the radar (100 days quit) i stopped posting roll and no one noticed. What makes this time different:
I hate my life on nicotine
I told my wife on day 2 EVERYTHING
I am involved on many levels with this site
I confessed I AM AN ADDICT
I pray for God to be with me
This is my experience. Take what you will.
One of the greatest moves (Statements) in my quit was when I realized I was addicted and took the advise to come clean with my wife. I went to my wife and showed her KTC.
I told her that I always thought I could quit because I loved her and my family. Realizing I was an addict explained that I wasn't capable of quitting out of love.
I finally was sick of it and asked her to support me. I had her read the spouse section on KTC. I showed her all my hiding places for tin. I think this move instilled a belief that I finally wasn't playing around and I was serious about my quit.
Today, I can't imagine being quit and keeping her in the dark on this. I wouldn't have read a love letter she wrote me on day 100. My kids cards and having them ask me "What day are you on today?"
Almost coming to 500 days now. The cravings are a piece of cake because I involved everyone, including my kids. I tell my wife that I am craving or if I am acting strange, she lets me know that I must be on the verge of another breakthrough in my recovery. She keeps me level and strong when I am not.
My experience is positive. Its in women's nature to forgive and nurture. Give her the opportunity to hold your hand in this.....
Also what if she finds out anyway? I think if she finds out, she will be more hurt that you didn't come to her and involve her. Seriously, if she had a struggle, how would you feel if she kept you in the dark?
If you think a confession and asking for support is a relationship breaker...not coming clean is a lie and your relationship has no foundation of truth to stand on.
May sound harsh but test your marriage by making it founded on facts and truth. You'll be glad you did.
If you do or don't it wont impact me either way. Just sharing my experience to a fellow brother in quit.
I'm with these guys, I was also a black belt ninja dipper. My addiction also changed when I brought my wife into my support group and stopped my 34 years deceitful marriage. What a prick I'd been all those years.
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Have you told your wife any of this? I tried this site before and made it 180 days and caved. I knew no one here except for one vet who pm'd me and that was it. No one at home knew. My wife had ZERO clue. I had a black belt in :ph43r: dipping. I was accountable to no one. After I fell off the radar (100 days quit) i stopped posting roll and no one noticed. What makes this time different:
I hate my life on nicotine
I told my wife on day 2 EVERYTHING
I am involved on many levels with this site
I confessed I AM AN ADDICT
I pray for God to be with me
This is my experience. Take what you will.
One of the greatest moves (Statements) in my quit was when I realized I was addicted and took the advise to come clean with my wife. I went to my wife and showed her KTC.
I told her that I always thought I could quit because I loved her and my family. Realizing I was an addict explained that I wasn't capable of quitting out of love.
I finally was sick of it and asked her to support me. I had her read the spouse section on KTC. I showed her all my hiding places for tin. I think this move instilled a belief that I finally wasn't playing around and I was serious about my quit.
Today, I can't imagine being quit and keeping her in the dark on this. I wouldn't have read a love letter she wrote me on day 100. My kids cards and having them ask me "What day are you on today?"
Almost coming to 500 days now. The cravings are a piece of cake because I involved everyone, including my kids. I tell my wife that I am craving or if I am acting strange, she lets me know that I must be on the verge of another breakthrough in my recovery. She keeps me level and strong when I am not.
My experience is positive. Its in women's nature to forgive and nurture. Give her the opportunity to hold your hand in this.....
Also what if she finds out anyway? I think if she finds out, she will be more hurt that you didn't come to her and involve her. Seriously, if she had a struggle, how would you feel if she kept you in the dark?
If you think a confession and asking for support is a relationship breaker...not coming clean is a lie and your relationship has no foundation of truth to stand on.
May sound harsh but test your marriage by making it founded on facts and truth. You'll be glad you did.
If you do or don't it wont impact me either way. Just sharing my experience to a fellow brother in quit.
I'm with these guys, I was also a black belt ninja dipper. My addiction also changed when I brought my wife into my support group and stopped my 34 years deceitful marriage. What a prick I'd been all those years.
These are true statements. Let her help you, it was the best decision I could have made.
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Well. Good news. I think. Went to ENT today. He saw nothing in this lump behind my ear that was concerning. He asked if I wanted to order a CT scan just to be sure, given history of tobacco use, so I am going to do that. I think it will help my quit regardless if I feel the feeling of relief that I am not "too late" and I still stay strong.
Overall, the ENT thought this lump was not noticeable and thought it was muscular related from some small muscles around the sternocledomastoid region and saw some signs of TMJ overuse. I do grind my teeth at night so maybe this makes sense.
Also, had appointment with Oral Surgeon and he reviewed the inside of my mouth as well. He did see some luekoplakia (white area) from where I keep chew but did not think it was cancerous. What he does is he orders me to quit for 3 weeks and to come back in and see if it has gone away. I am now past 72 hours and am nic free so that feels easy. " I will do it, doc" I said.
I think in this is good because it will force my quit for the next couple weeks and really solidify this quit? The real test will be when I go back and he hopefully says, " looks good." then I have to really remember this horrible past two weeks of guilt and fear and shame and focus on what kind of person I really want to be.
So I didn't get the total relief of " everything is ok" because neither of them really had a conclusive answer and I have to do a CT scan next week. And I still have this pain behind my ear, but hopefully that goes away soon. .
Thanks to all who wrote me such nice things. I was amazed at the response I got here in just a few minutes and I can tell that many people have gone through the same fear that I have. Thanks to the people that gave me their phone numbers and I will write you updates as well.
My oral surgery appt is on August 1st, so that is my focus. One day at a time, until August 1st and then 1 day at a time until my day 100. I still struggle with the concept of forever, and how much that will suck, but I think if I focus on one day until I get to my August 1st date and my day 100 then I will be able to wrap my head around that.
I want to be able to kiss my wife without having to brush my teeth, use mouthwash and throw in some gum just for my breath to be tolerable. I want to be able to read my kids a story without have to get up and spit in the sink. I want to have my wife look in my truck without the fear that she will find a can. I don't want to have to worry about my health like that again. One can not ever be certain of anything in this life and I could contract some horrible disease someday totally unrelated to my tobacco past. . It might wreck my life and destroy my family and that is only known to God what path my life will lead. But at least, it won't be a choice that I consistently made every day to endanger myself with and I think I could live with that. Getting a tobacco related illness and watching other suffer for my actions is too much to bear.
I will keep updating this post as I try and figure all this out. Thanks all.
**P.S. I am about over Smokey Mountain. Holt sucks too and Jake's is boring. Anyone try Golden Eagle or have any other suggestions? I might punch myself in the face. :P
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My only thing to add to this is if I can fuckin do it you can fuckin do it buddy...the can is a way for a company to control you and your life. Just keep doing it every day and don't look back. Check in, talk to your buddy's on here and move on, looks like its time for you to break this relationship off.
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This news sounds much better than it did a few days ago. Please hang in there, and I have said several prayers for you. Stay strong and stay quit.
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This is much better news beartrapper. I'll bet it was a huge relief. Now here's what you have to do. NEVER FORGET HOW YOU FELT WHEN YOU MADE YOUR FIRST POST!!! Never ever forget that.
I still remember how I felt that one morning this Spring when I discovered a hard-ish, slightly sore about nickel-sized lump under my jaw in that soft tissue area between my tongue and my jaw. "OH FUCK!" All the same shit that you wrote went through my head. "It's too late. I really fucked up now. So so stupid." Wife, kids, dogs, etc. "Everything in my life I wasted by dipping Copenhagen." Luckily it was related to a sinus infection and went away.
But I remember that day, every day. It scared the ever living shit out of me. Now here I am, 117 days into my quit. I will never use nicotine again.
NEVER FORGET HOW YOU FELT.
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I am about over Smokey Mountain. Holt sucks too and Jake's is boring. Anyone try Golden Eagle or have any other suggestions? I might punch myself in the face. :P
Step 1, punch yourself in the face. Many guys here would recommend the balls, so you should probably try both.
I think it's pretty well established that Smokey Mountain and Hooch are the best fake chews, but none of the fake chew products have nicotine, so none will satisfy your cravings the way you want them to. If the fake doesn't work for you, go with seeds or gum or pack your lip with tea (much cheaper than the fake).
Hang in there. Fight. We're fighting with you.
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Jrod- what kind of tea??
Wade- agree completely. That feeling hasn't worn off yet and that is why I joined this site. Because I wanted it to stick and not to forget. I got this.
All you quitters.... Isnt it nice to not have bad breath today??!!!
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That is great news beartrapper, now just make sure you take Wades advice and remember why you are NAFAR. Hate the nic bitch all you can and what she has already taken from you, and remember no matter what she whispers in your ear when you get the all clear from the doc ("see I didn't hurt you, your tougher than these guys in here, your man enough to Handel me, why don't you come on back to me and quit later, you need me to enjoy life") ITS All A fucking lie bro. Nicotine didn't enhance anything for you, it only took away. I quit with you.
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I am about over Smokey Mountain. Holt sucks too and Jake's is boring. Anyone try Golden Eagle or have any other suggestions? I might punch myself in the face.  :P
Step 1, punch yourself in the face. Many guys here would recommend the balls, so you should probably try both.
I think it's pretty well established that Smokey Mountain and Hooch are the best fake chews, but none of the fake chew products have nicotine, so none will satisfy your cravings the way you want them to. If the fake doesn't work for you, go with seeds or gum or pack your lip with tea (much cheaper than the fake).
Hang in there. Fight. We're fighting with you.
I am going to trust you with the secret recipe to CaliforniaSlim's World Famous Dip Substitute. Here goes, Shh don't tell anyone:
Some coffee grounds and some brown sugar wrapped in a piece of coffee filter.
It worked for me for a week. The mint stuff didn't do anything, but after about a week, I realized what these folks are telling you. It doesn't have nic so it won't satisfy. Really, all you're hoping for is to keep your mouth happy enough that your brain is free to jab sticks into the nicbitch's eyes. Seeds do the trick for me.
Seems like you are doing great. Keep up the good quit.
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Give us an update brother! How you doin'... How you feelin'?
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I am about over Smokey Mountain. Holt sucks too and Jake's is boring. Anyone try Golden Eagle or have any other suggestions? I might punch myself in the face.  :P
Step 1, punch yourself in the face. Many guys here would recommend the balls, so you should probably try both.
I think it's pretty well established that Smokey Mountain and Hooch are the best fake chews, but none of the fake chew products have nicotine, so none will satisfy your cravings the way you want them to. If the fake doesn't work for you, go with seeds or gum or pack your lip with tea (much cheaper than the fake).
Hang in there. Fight. We're fighting with you.
I am going to trust you with the secret recipe to CaliforniaSlim's World Famous Dip Substitute. Here goes, Shh don't tell anyone:
Some coffee grounds and some brown sugar wrapped in a piece of coffee filter.
It worked for me for a week. The mint stuff didn't do anything, but after about a week, I realized what these folks are telling you. It doesn't have nic so it won't satisfy. Really, all you're hoping for is to keep your mouth happy enough that your brain is free to jab sticks into the nicbitch's eyes. Seeds do the trick for me.
Seems like you are doing great. Keep up the good quit.
I needed the fake dip early on: first few days and then less for first 2 weeks. I switched to sunflower seeds after that with hard candy and bubble gum too. I am 6 weeks in now and hit the seeds only when I am playing video games. Other than that the bubble gum works best for me.
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Jrod- what kind of tea??
Sorry I didn't reply earlier.
My wife is a tea drinker so I've tried all kinds. I don't recommend Good Earth, that stuff will burn a hole in your lip. Black tea tastes like crap. All of it stains your teeth.
I'd recommend a mild tea with some sort of flavor, nothing flowery. Soak the tea bag in cold water for about a minute, tear open and pack. It has a similar feel to dip, but as stated previously it doesn't satisfy, just gives your mouth something to do. I went off coffee the same time as nic, and the tea allowed me to get a bit of caffeine so I wouldn't have withdrawals from both.
Hang in there and give us an update.
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Jrod-Â what kind of tea??Â
Sorry I didn't reply earlier.
My wife is a tea drinker so I've tried all kinds. I don't recommend Good Earth, that stuff will burn a hole in your lip. Black tea tastes like crap. All of it stains your teeth.
I'd recommend a mild tea with some sort of flavor, nothing flowery. Soak the tea bag in cold water for about a minute, tear open and pack. It has a similar feel to dip, but as stated previously it doesn't satisfy, just gives your mouth something to do. I went off coffee the same time as nic, and the tea allowed me to get a bit of caffeine so I wouldn't have withdrawals from both.
Hang in there and give us an update.
How can you tell that I used to live in Oakland? I saw your name and was trying to figure out why you put an R in Beat Rapper. Cracked myself up laughing when I figured it out.
Glad to be quit with you Trapper.
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Still quit and feeling pretty good as far as the craves go. Days 8-11 were rough but then the light lifted a bit. My issue is I have been having all these wierd symptoms. I don't know if these are a continuation of my wierd lump behind my ear or some kind of wierd infection I am still getting over or what. But I don't really feel "quit" yet because I haven't really felt good yet to where I would really be tempted to start up again. Still kind of living scared.
Any wierd withdrawal symptoms from you guys? My main thing is the overwhelming tiredness. It was really bad the first week and now seems better. But now I am having all these weird tingling pains over my whole body. First it started in my ribcage as a little tingly prickly feeling. Then it moved around to my armpit and now my stomach. Very wierd. Like a little burning prickly sensation. So not sure if that is some wierd horrible disease or just a symptom. My voice is scratchy in the morning too along with having to clear my throat more than normal. Maybe just not used to not have dip spit stuck in there like a loser!!
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Still quit and feeling pretty good as far as the craves go. Days 8-11 were rough but then the light lifted a bit. My issue is I have been having all these wierd symptoms. I don't know if these are a continuation of my wierd lump behind my ear or some kind of wierd infection I am still getting over or what. But I don't really feel "quit" yet because I haven't really felt good yet to where I would really be tempted to start up again. Still kind of living scared.
Any wierd withdrawal symptoms from you guys? My main thing is the overwhelming tiredness. It was really bad the first week and now seems better. But now I am having all these weird tingling pains over my whole body. First it started in my ribcage as a little tingly prickly feeling. Then it moved around to my armpit and now my stomach. Very wierd. Like a little burning prickly sensation. So not sure if that is some wierd horrible disease or just a symptom. My voice is scratchy in the morning too along with having to clear my throat more than normal. Maybe just not used to not have dip spit stuck in there like a loser!!
Go to your doc and getit checked out. Almost guaranteed its nothing but getting the "all clear" from the doc will help ease your mind. And if it is important the sooner the better! It may just be anxiety, I experienced anxiety and had symptoms I still can't explain. But go to your doc bro, it's worth the price of mind. Quit with you all day.
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Still quit and feeling pretty good as far as the craves go. Days 8-11 were rough but then the light lifted a bit. My issue is I have been having all these wierd symptoms. I don't know if these are a continuation of my wierd lump behind my ear or some kind of wierd infection I am still getting over or what. But I don't really feel "quit" yet because I haven't really felt good yet to where I would really be tempted to start up again. Still kind of living scared.
Any wierd withdrawal symptoms from you guys? My main thing is the overwhelming tiredness. It was really bad the first week and now seems better. But now I am having all these weird tingling pains over my whole body. First it started in my ribcage as a little tingly prickly feeling. Then it moved around to my armpit and now my stomach. Very wierd. Like a little burning prickly sensation. So not sure if that is some wierd horrible disease or just a symptom. My voice is scratchy in the morning too along with having to clear my throat more than normal. Maybe just not used to not have dip spit stuck in there like a loser!!
Go to your doc and getit checked out. Almost guaranteed its nothing but getting the "all clear" from the doc will help ease your mind. And if it is important the sooner the better! It may just be anxiety, I experienced anxiety and had symptoms I still can't explain. But go to your doc bro, it's worth the price of mind. Quit with you all day.
Many of us get some weird pains and sores after quitting. A big part of that is your body adjusting to living without your nicotine medication. But as Erussell said, if you're living scared it may be best to get yourself checked out - ease your mind. Any symptom lasting 2 weeks is probably worth looking into.
In other news, you haven't been posting with us in October. What's up? We're currently discussing how to handle guys that skip roll posting, and your name is on the list. Please pop in and explain, then start posting every day.
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Still quit and feeling pretty good as far as the craves go. Days 8-11 were rough but then the light lifted a bit. My issue is I have been having all these wierd symptoms. I don't know if these are a continuation of my wierd lump behind my ear or some kind of wierd infection I am still getting over or what.  But I don't really feel "quit" yet because I haven't really felt good yet to where I would really be tempted to start up again. Still kind of living scared.
Any wierd withdrawal symptoms from you guys?  My main thing is the overwhelming tiredness.  It was really bad the first week and now seems better.  But now I am having all these weird tingling pains over my whole body. First it started in my ribcage as a little tingly prickly feeling. Then it moved around to my armpit and now my stomach. Very wierd. Like a little burning prickly sensation. So not sure if that is some wierd horrible disease or just a symptom. My voice is scratchy in the morning too along with having to clear my throat more than normal. Maybe just not used to not have dip spit stuck in there like a loser!!
Go to your doc and getit checked out. Almost guaranteed its nothing but getting the "all clear" from the doc will help ease your mind. And if it is important the sooner the better! It may just be anxiety, I experienced anxiety and had symptoms I still can't explain. But go to your doc bro, it's worth the price of mind. Quit with you all day.
Many of us get some weird pains and sores after quitting. A big part of that is your body adjusting to living without your nicotine medication. But as Erussell said, if you're living scared it may be best to get yourself checked out - ease your mind. Any symptom lasting 2 weeks is probably worth looking into.
In other news, you haven't been posting with us in October. What's up? We're currently discussing how to handle guys that skip roll posting, and your name is on the list. Please pop in and explain, then start posting every day.
Got a few articles for you to read about symptoms and what to expect:
Symptoms (http://www.killthecan.org/yourquit/symptoms.asp)
What to Expect (http://www.killthecan.org/yourquit/what.asp)
Your quit Decision (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=1791&view=findpost&p=4771433) MUST be 100% about you. Anything short of that sets you up for failure by allowing your addict brain to blame a given situation as reason for you to go back to the can. Quitting out of fear of a medical issue fades as soon as the doctor or dentist gives you a clean bill of health.
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Thanks to all for following up with me. Still quit but it doesn't feel real yet because I feel like crap and worried and that dominates all my daily routine. Had a ct scan last week and waiting on results and went and got some blood work. Felt really tired and this weird tingling all over my body got worse and now my arms are sore like I did a crazy workout too hard (which I didn't) . Arms feel like 10 pounds each and when I am work I have trouble typing. Oh, yeah, also in this amazingly awful time in my life, I got a job offer and am leaving my company. And I am having a baby in 2 months. Awesome work.
So I am day 21 but doesn't fee like it. Day 1-9 were hard and I just kept thinking about how I wanted to dip but couldn't. Then the symptoms got so bad and I just was worried and didn't want it anymore. I just decided not to want it and not think about it, if that makes sense.
Sand Fleas gotta eat talked to me and explained how people need to see my roll post, not just for me but because people have short memories and my story rang true with some people. So I recommit to login here and post. Still quit. Mostly because if I ever get healthy again I never, ever, ever want to do this past 20 days of worry and withdrawal again. Thanks all.
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Thanks to all for following up with me. Still quit but it doesn't feel real yet because I feel like crap and worried and that dominates all my daily routine. Had a ct scan last week and waiting on results and went and got some blood work. Felt really tired and this weird tingling all over my body got worse and now my arms are sore like I did a crazy workout too hard (which I didn't) . Arms feel like 10 pounds each and when I am work I have trouble typing. Oh, yeah, also in this amazingly awful time in my life, I got a job offer and am leaving my company. And I am having a baby in 2 months. Awesome work.
So I am day 21 but doesn't fee like it. Day 1-9 were hard and I just kept thinking about how I wanted to dip but couldn't. Then the symptoms got so bad and I just was worried and didn't want it anymore. I just decided not to want it and not think about it, if that makes sense.
Sand Fleas gotta eat talked to me and explained how people need to see my roll post, not just for me but because people have short memories and my story rang true with some people. So I recommit to login here and post. Still quit. Mostly because if I ever get healthy again I never, ever, ever want to do this past 20 days of worry and withdrawal again. Thanks all.
This pisses me off! And I hope in the not too distant future it pisses you off too! Can you even believe what you let a tin of shredded plant do to you? Don't get me wrong - I let it rob me of a lot in my life, so I'm not calling you a fool. Well, maybe I am but I'm a fool too.
Tobacco robbed me of time with my family. Of 36k. Of confidence. Of pride. And what did it give back?
Not one damn thing, my friend. Not that I condone this, but do you know what I could do with 36k at the bunny ranch in Nevada? I would get something out of that at least! I might need some antibiotics afterward but wow the memories!!!
Don't ever, ever, ever forget this. It is probably one of the darkest periods in your life. And you alone have the power to make the choice to never, ever, ever relive it. Glad you put this down in writing. Next time you have even the slightest crave for some nicotine, get on here and read this.
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I wanted to bump Beartrappers thread for a couple reasons. The first being that today I am 60 days quit and I remember lurking after my cave in May and this guy's story finally penetrated my thick ass skull. His story really inspired me and I came back to the fold and quit, at least everyday these last 60.
Second, I hope my October '13 brothers remember our lost brother. We have had some weak roll post showings the last couple weekends and we can do better. Remember what it takes to stay quit fellas, have a great weekend!
I am quit today with all you KTC bad asses!
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Thanks for bumping this up Jhud, read beartrapper's whole thread, it pretty much describes my last 3-4 weeks of quit. So yes, for anyone reading this, if you have fear, go to a real doc get checked out! Quit the internet self diagnosis, everything is cancer. See or find a doc you trust to talk to about your problems, be totally honest about everything you'll probably find out you're fine. But remember the fear how it made you feel to motivate your quit!!