KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum

Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Dirk on October 20, 2014, 05:48:00 PM

Title: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Dirk on October 20, 2014, 05:48:00 PM
Hello all, I'm Dirk. Been on the can for 21 years. Longest stint without it was a few days 2 years ago while I was hospitalized. I've got a toddler at home and a new one on the way and have been toying with the idea of a "quit date" and "slowing down", but after finding this site today, I realize how much of a pussy I've been. I'm fucking done, two cans of Cope in the garbage. I never thought this day would come and it probably never would have. After reading the "Contract to give up" and balling like a baby after reading Tom and Jenny's story, it was time to nut up. I've got a serious trigger approaching in November with the start of our duck hunting season, so I'm preparing for it now and looking forward to not picking Copenhagen grains out of a stuck call reed. Thank you in advance for your support. Do I Post Roll now or after I've been one full day without the junk.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: starr_78 on October 20, 2014, 05:53:00 PM
Brother it is good to have you aboard and good to see that you understand the seriousness of quitting. Get straight to posting roll ASAP. You have flushed your stash and now you are ready to get to quitting. Keep close to this site and read like you already have been reading. It will cement your reason for coming here. Quit everyday and post roll every day. We don't take time off for posting because nicotine doesn't stop driving us crazy with head games. You can do this! If you need anything at all reach out to a fellow quitter. We have all been here before and understand exactly what you need.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Grizzlyhasclaws on October 20, 2014, 06:08:00 PM
Flush those can contents and rinse them out then throw then out. Eliminate dumpster diving from the possibilities tonight.

Welcome.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Dirk on October 20, 2014, 06:24:00 PM
Quote from: grizzlyhasclaws
Flush those can contents and rinse them out then throw then out. Eliminate dumpster diving from the possibilities tonight.

Welcome.
They are in my garbage can at work, I'm already commuting. The janitor will make sure their fate is met tonight.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Grizzlyhasclaws on October 20, 2014, 06:42:00 PM
Quote from: Dirk
Quote from: grizzlyhasclaws
Flush those can contents and rinse them out then throw then out. Eliminate dumpster diving from the possibilities tonight.

Welcome.
They are in my garbage can at work, I'm already commuting. The janitor will make sure their fate is met tonight.
Great. You can do this. The next few days will totally suck. Just read as much as you can here on KTC and get involved with your quit group. Get some sunflower seeds and atomic fireballs. Chug a shit ton of water too. Read read read.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Sir Nopenhagen on October 20, 2014, 06:42:00 PM
Best decision you could have made. Post roll today,this is your day one. You will be in the January 2015 quit group and there are a bunch of bad ass quitters over there. Check your pm box I sent you one. This will be my first duck season copenhagen free in 25 years. We can get through it and I bet it's your best season ever. Proud to quit with you today.

Sir Nope
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: NoMoreCopeBlack on October 20, 2014, 10:24:00 PM
Welcome, genius. I quit with you in Jan 15.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Steakbomb18 on October 21, 2014, 06:56:00 AM
Albeit brief, that was a great intro. To the point, badass, and a show of humility. A couple of pieces of advice; you post roll and you are quit. There is no preparing or ramp up - you post roll and make the promise to not use nicotine for that day; then you are quit. Every time you "quit" and start again, you're not really quitting; you're just stopping. Quitting is a daily act; one you must actively perform because you'll forever be an addict. Reason I describe quitting this way for you is because this is the mentality you will need for duck hunting. Not the mentality of I haven't used for the past 30 days (which helps), but rather; I am quit, I posted roll, and I WILL NOT USE NICOTINE TODAY.

The other thing is build an accountability network. Don't find yourself in a duck hunting group of friends who are drinking and dipping without a lifeline to call/text to hold you accountable to your word. All of us successful quitters have networks. People we communicate with every day. This is how we can help you; and in time you will reciprocate that help but for now worry about you. Post roll and build that accountability.

Check your in-box, you'll find your first life-line
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: zam on October 21, 2014, 08:02:00 AM
I'm excited for you...you're about to start learning the details of just how much the nic bitch was pulling your strings. Honestly, you may think you know, but you don't. If you put in the effort to stay quit and the effort to understand what nicotine is about and how it effects you...well..getting through each day will become much easier. You will not believe the shit you did last week in order to further your addiction.

Congrats on a great decision, and on the start of a new path.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Dirk on October 21, 2014, 09:38:00 AM
Thanks for the support gents. Me and the misses got into it and I wanted to cave like a mutha fahka last night, but didn't. Woke up this morning and quit again. I did dream about it and it was the very first thing I thought of when I woke up. The fight continues.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: 30isEnuff on October 21, 2014, 09:51:00 AM
Quote from: Dirk
Thanks for the support gents. Me and the misses got into it and I wanted to cave like a mutha fahka last night, but didn't. Woke up this morning and quit again. I did dream about it and it was the very first thing I thought of when I woke up. The fight continues.
Hell yes!
You can do this ODAAT and NAFAR, period
You're not here by accident. This site saved my life, because I allowed it to.
Post Roll
honor your word
wake and repeat
I'm doing it, you can to.
I quit with You Today!
Cheers.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Frosty179 on October 21, 2014, 10:53:00 AM
you got this brother just keep posting roll with me and all the other January 2015 quitters and you got this in the bag, its all in your head show the nic bitch that you are stronger than it. Also get some numbers and text others
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: NoMoreCopeBlack on October 21, 2014, 10:55:00 AM
Quote from: Dirk
Thanks for the support gents. Me and the misses got into it and I wanted to cave like a mutha fahka last night, but didn't. Woke up this morning and quit again. I did dream about it and it was the very first thing I thought of when I woke up. The fight continues.
I blamed a cave last year on the old lady. Never would have happened if I was on KTC then and already promised my quit brothers and sisters not to dip that day. It's the same old story almost every day now but my quit just gets stronger.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: lighty7 on October 21, 2014, 11:12:00 AM
Quote from: NoMoreCopeBlack
Quote from: Dirk
Thanks for the support gents. Me and the misses got into it and I wanted to cave like a mutha fahka last night, but didn't. Woke up this morning and quit again. I did dream about it and it was the very first thing I thought of when I woke up. The fight continues.
I blamed a cave last year on the old lady. Never would have happened if I was on KTC then and already promised my quit brothers and sisters not to dip that day. It's the same old story almost every day now but my quit just gets stronger.
+ this a million times. I got into fights with the wife early in my quit and you tell yourself, "she's making me want to cave". Fact is she isn't - it's the nicotine addiction speaking and it is desparately trying to come up with ANYTHING to get it's nicotine fix. Recognize it for what it is and you will be stronger for it.

I was a similar situation to you - dipped 22 years and I have 2 young kids. Just follow the program here, get involved and you can have your freedom back. How many times have you not spent time with your child to go off and dip? We've all done it and let me tell you the FREEDOM from not having nicotine run your life is worth it.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Pinched on October 21, 2014, 11:36:00 AM
Quote from: lighty7
Quote from: NoMoreCopeBlack
Quote from: Dirk
Thanks for the support gents. Me and the misses got into it and I wanted to cave like a mutha fahka last night, but didn't. Woke up this morning and quit again. I did dream about it and it was the very first thing I thought of when I woke up. The fight continues.
I blamed a cave last year on the old lady. Never would have happened if I was on KTC then and already promised my quit brothers and sisters not to dip that day. It's the same old story almost every day now but my quit just gets stronger.
+ this a million times. I got into fights with the wife early in my quit and you tell yourself, "she's making me want to cave". Fact is she isn't - it's the nicotine addiction speaking and it is desparately trying to come up with ANYTHING to get it's nicotine fix. Recognize it for what it is and you will be stronger for it.

I was a similar situation to you - dipped 22 years and I have 2 young kids. Just follow the program here, get involved and you can have your freedom back. How many times have you not spent time with your child to go off and dip? We've all done it and let me tell you the FREEDOM from not having nicotine run your life is worth it.
My wife God bless her is a saint because she lived through A-marrying me, B-my addiction and C-my quit. I was a complete asshole not only in quit but not the role model husband. However with her support I was able to quit. Have you shown her the Spousal Support (http://www.killthecan.org/community/spousal-support/) section of the KTC website yet? Have you read that yet?

It helps to have her in your corner and it helps her understand why you are being a dick if she knows this. Just remember that she didn't make you become an addict and the Nic Bitch is not worth ruining a perfectly good marriage.

Keep on fighting and be ready for anything.

P
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Landdon on October 21, 2014, 02:43:00 PM
Welcome Dirk. Glad you're here friend! You will succeed here, but you have to follow the program (which is simple btw).
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Dagranger on October 21, 2014, 10:25:00 PM
Quote from: lighty7
Quote from: NoMoreCopeBlack
Quote from: Dirk
Thanks for the support gents. Me and the misses got into it and I wanted to cave like a mutha fahka last night, but didn't. Woke up this morning and quit again. I did dream about it and it was the very first thing I thought of when I woke up. The fight continues.
I blamed a cave last year on the old lady. Never would have happened if I was on KTC then and already promised my quit brothers and sisters not to dip that day. It's the same old story almost every day now but my quit just gets stronger.
+ this a million times. I got into fights with the wife early in my quit and you tell yourself, "she's making me want to cave". Fact is she isn't - it's the nicotine addiction speaking and it is desparately trying to come up with ANYTHING to get it's nicotine fix. Recognize it for what it is and you will be stronger for it.

I was a similar situation to you - dipped 22 years and I have 2 young kids. Just follow the program here, get involved and you can have your freedom back. How many times have you not spent time with your child to go off and dip? We've all done it and let me tell you the FREEDOM from not having nicotine run your life is worth it.
This advice is spot on. Your brain is going to come up with a million reasons to cave....if you stop and think about any of them they don't make sense. No need to put a weed in your mouth ever again. Good luck!
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Mogul on October 22, 2014, 01:41:00 AM
You didn't cave because the quit is for you. If it was for your wife and she pissed you off then the FIRST thing you would have done was caved. I hope you see this. OK but you're still and addict as am I. You are winning and please don't let that stop. ride the HOF train and experience a life without nicotine. It truly is awesome. Welcome to the crazy ass quit club.

Mogul
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Jim Golfer on October 22, 2014, 02:10:00 AM
3 days here. I agree with the other poster who said go get them out of your trash and rinse them down the drain. Today my crazy thoughts came back. I saw myself as a non-addict who should just use Skoal pouches rather than my usual Copenhagen Long Cut. Who am I kidding? I would rip open those pouches or just throw that crap away and get the real stuff. That's one of the reasons I can't even mess with the "safe" replacements like mint chew or jerkey chew. That whole oral fixation thing.

It's my 3rd day and the last two nights I basically didn't sleep. Not only that but I feel this tingly feeling all over my skin and my stomach is knotted. It's pretty horrible and I know a dip would probably solve all that and give me one hour of pleasure before I go to bed. Then I could start hating myself again. Isn't that just grand!

So, I went to the gym tonight and was trying to think of what I should do to occupy myself. Hey, how about going on Kill the Can and work on the one thing that is probably the most important in my life at the moment? Good idea. Now I've posted a few times, sent a PM to a guy who also has 3 days and I don't feel like dipping.

This forum works for me if I take part.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Dirk on October 22, 2014, 12:19:00 PM
Quote from: mogul
You didn't cave because the quit is for you. If it was for your wife and she pissed you off then the FIRST thing you would have done was caved. I hope you see this. OK but you're still and addict as am I. You are winning and please don't let that stop. ride the HOF train and experience a life without nicotine. It truly is awesome. Welcome to the crazy ass quit club.

Mogul
Great points Mogul and I think you are spot on. This is a crazy ass quit club and I like it that way.


Jim Golfer, those two cans are in some landfill by now. Nice work on going to the gym and getting on KTC. KTC is an anti-trigger.

This is day 3 for me and things are getting a little easier. I am not having issues going to bed, but do find that I'm waking up often throughout the night. I look forward to sleeping, that was the only time that I wasn't dipping so it's the easiest time of day for me now. Little victories.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: gooch44 on October 22, 2014, 12:32:00 PM
I'm on day 4 so I'm right there with ya. I also chewed for over 20 years so I know exactly what you're going thru! Days 1 and 2 weren't too bad for me but day 3...I felt like punching someone. I bought some fake chew yesterday and that helped. We can do this!
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: OSAGE on October 22, 2014, 03:59:00 PM
Quote from: gooch44
I'm on day 4 so I'm right there with ya. I also chewed for over 20 years so I know exactly what you're going thru! Days 1 and 2 weren't too bad for me but day 3...I felt like punching someone. I bought some fake chew yesterday and that helped. We can do this!
You will have your good and bad days. Keep KTC, seeds, jolly ranchers, fake crap, or whatever it takes close to you to get through a tuff crave. Be prepared! This isn't easy, but you can do it!
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: ZillahCowboy on October 22, 2014, 11:49:00 PM
Quote from: Dirk
Quote from: mogul
You didn't cave because the quit is for you. If it was for your wife and she pissed you off then the FIRST thing you would have done was caved. I hope you see this. OK but you're still and addict as am I. You are winning and please don't let that stop. ride the HOF train and experience a life without nicotine. It truly is awesome. Welcome to the crazy ass quit club.

Mogul
Great points Mogul and I think you are spot on. This is a crazy ass quit club and I like it that way.


Jim Golfer, those two cans are in some landfill by now. Nice work on going to the gym and getting on KTC. KTC is an anti-trigger.

This is day 3 for me and things are getting a little easier. I am not having issues going to bed, but do find that I'm waking up often throughout the night. I look forward to sleeping, that was the only time that I wasn't dipping so it's the easiest time of day for me now. Little victories.
Dirk,
Let me offer my welcome as well. The keys to the quit kingdom lie in Posting Roll every damn day. Don't miss a day for any reason. Build your network of quit buddies and hold them close, hold them accountable, and they will do the same for you.
Take care and forge on one day at a time. PM me if you need anything.
Zillah.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Mthomas3824 on October 23, 2014, 05:12:00 PM
Quote from: Zillah
Quote from: Dirk
Quote from: mogul
You didn't cave because the quit is for you. If it was for your wife and she pissed you off then the FIRST thing you would have done was caved. I hope you see this. OK but you're still and addict as am I. You are winning and please don't let that stop. ride the HOF train and experience a life without nicotine. It truly is awesome. Welcome to the crazy ass quit club.

Mogul
Great points Mogul and I think you are spot on. This is a crazy ass quit club and I like it that way.


Jim Golfer, those two cans are in some landfill by now. Nice work on going to the gym and getting on KTC. KTC is an anti-trigger.

This is day 3 for me and things are getting a little easier. I am not having issues going to bed, but do find that I'm waking up often throughout the night. I look forward to sleeping, that was the only time that I wasn't dipping so it's the easiest time of day for me now. Little victories.
Dirk,
Let me offer my welcome as well. The keys to the quit kingdom lie in Posting Roll every damn day. Don't miss a day for any reason. Build your network of quit buddies and hold them close, hold them accountable, and they will do the same for you.
Take care and forge on one day at a time. PM me if you need anything.
Zillah.
I'm lost is this a guilty chewer or is he really on board?
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Dirk on October 23, 2014, 08:47:00 PM
Quote from: Mthomas3824
Quote from: Zillah
Quote from: Dirk
Quote from: mogul
You didn't cave because the quit is for you. If it was for your wife and she pissed you off then the FIRST thing you would have done was caved. I hope you see this. OK but you're still and addict as am I. You are winning and please don't let that stop. ride the HOF train and experience a life without nicotine. It truly is awesome. Welcome to the crazy ass quit club.

Mogul
Great points Mogul and I think you are spot on. This is a crazy ass quit club and I like it that way.


Jim Golfer, those two cans are in some landfill by now. Nice work on going to the gym and getting on KTC. KTC is an anti-trigger.

This is day 3 for me and things are getting a little easier. I am not having issues going to bed, but do find that I'm waking up often throughout the night. I look forward to sleeping, that was the only time that I wasn't dipping so it's the easiest time of day for me now. Little victories.
Dirk,
Let me offer my welcome as well. The keys to the quit kingdom lie in Posting Roll every damn day. Don't miss a day for any reason. Build your network of quit buddies and hold them close, hold them accountable, and they will do the same for you.
Take care and forge on one day at a time. PM me if you need anything.
Zillah.
I'm lost is this a guilty chewer or is he really on board?
MThomas, you talking about me? I haven't chewed since before posting roll on Monday and I'm 100% for posting roll. What would give you that idea?
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Steakbomb18 on October 23, 2014, 09:37:00 PM
Quote from: Dirk
Quote from: Mthomas3824
Quote from: Zillah
Quote from: Dirk
Quote from: mogul
You didn't cave because the quit is for you. If it was for your wife and she pissed you off then the FIRST thing you would have done was caved. I hope you see this. OK but you're still and addict as am I. You are winning and please don't let that stop. ride the HOF train and experience a life without nicotine. It truly is awesome. Welcome to the crazy ass quit club.

Mogul
Great points Mogul and I think you are spot on. This is a crazy ass quit club and I like it that way.


Jim Golfer, those two cans are in some landfill by now. Nice work on going to the gym and getting on KTC. KTC is an anti-trigger.

This is day 3 for me and things are getting a little easier. I am not having issues going to bed, but do find that I'm waking up often throughout the night. I look forward to sleeping, that was the only time that I wasn't dipping so it's the easiest time of day for me now. Little victories.
Dirk,
Let me offer my welcome as well. The keys to the quit kingdom lie in Posting Roll every damn day. Don't miss a day for any reason. Build your network of quit buddies and hold them close, hold them accountable, and they will do the same for you.
Take care and forge on one day at a time. PM me if you need anything.
Zillah.
I'm lost is this a guilty chewer or is he really on board?
MThomas, you talking about me? I haven't chewed since before posting roll on Monday and I'm 100% for posting roll. What would give you that idea?
Sounds like a simple misinterpretation. You're doing this Dirk, keep it up. MThomas and all of us want this for you. Gentlemen, the quit is strong in this one. I foresee a badass quitter in the making.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: ZillahCowboy on October 24, 2014, 08:17:00 AM
Quote from: Steakbomb18
Quote from: Dirk
Quote from: Mthomas3824
Quote from: Zillah
Quote from: Dirk
Quote from: mogul
You didn't cave because the quit is for you. If it was for your wife and she pissed you off then the FIRST thing you would have done was caved. I hope you see this. OK but you're still and addict as am I. You are winning and please don't let that stop. ride the HOF train and experience a life without nicotine. It truly is awesome. Welcome to the crazy ass quit club.

Mogul
Great points Mogul and I think you are spot on. This is a crazy ass quit club and I like it that way.


Jim Golfer, those two cans are in some landfill by now. Nice work on going to the gym and getting on KTC. KTC is an anti-trigger.

This is day 3 for me and things are getting a little easier. I am not having issues going to bed, but do find that I'm waking up often throughout the night. I look forward to sleeping, that was the only time that I wasn't dipping so it's the easiest time of day for me now. Little victories.
Dirk,
Let me offer my welcome as well. The keys to the quit kingdom lie in Posting Roll every damn day. Don't miss a day for any reason. Build your network of quit buddies and hold them close, hold them accountable, and they will do the same for you.
Take care and forge on one day at a time. PM me if you need anything.
Zillah.
I'm lost is this a guilty chewer or is he really on board?
MThomas, you talking about me? I haven't chewed since before posting roll on Monday and I'm 100% for posting roll. What would give you that idea?
Sounds like a simple misinterpretation. You're doing this Dirk, keep it up. MThomas and all of us want this for you. Gentlemen, the quit is strong in this one. I foresee a badass quitter in the making.
Just keep posting roll one day at a time and all will be well.
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Smeds on January 27, 2015, 08:41:00 AM
Congrats on the 100th! 'dance'
Title: Re: Dammit I'm Done
Post by: Dirk on January 27, 2015, 08:59:00 AM
Quote from: Smeds
Congrats on the 100th! 'dance'
Thank you for the congrats and thank you for laying it down in our HOF class!