KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Dorsettr on December 02, 2012, 07:29:00 PM
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I've been dipping since around age 14 and I'm currently 22 now. I started dipping a can or more a day everyday at around age 19 and have started realizing this crazy train needs to end.
I really enjoy dipping, I'm trying to convince myself that its merely that I'm addicting to the habit and its a crutch of comfort. Right now I'm barely hanging in there.
I'm on day 5 this time and honestly I feel like a wreck. I don't remember feeling this way in the past, usually my worst moments peaked 1-3 but today is something different entirely. The idea of a pinch just sounds like a great time; but I realize that one of these days I'm going to have to quit and I'm this deep in the hole as is.
Pretty much I'm just rambling but its kept me from running to the store so far. I feel worthless and have pretty much spent the past few days self examining and deconstructing myself so low that I feel like dipping is the least of my problems and I can continue dipping until I get my life on track.
I know this habit is going to be the death of me, I'd dip a can in 4 pinches and leave each massive pinch in my mouth for about an hour or so at a time. My back and neck hurt all the time and I experience acute jaw pain.
In summation:
Fuck, I have a headache. Someone remind me why i'm doing this shit? I swear normally I'm decently articulate but today is just something else. Feels pretty bad. I've quit in the past for weeks at a time but never quite felt like this. If I relapse this time its going to be months before I try again.
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I've been dipping since around age 14 and I'm currently 22 now. I started dipping a can or more a day everyday at around age 19 and have started realizing this crazy train needs to end.
I really enjoy dipping, I'm trying to convince myself that its merely that I'm addicting to the habit and its a crutch of comfort. Right now I'm barely hanging in there.
I'm on day 5 this time and honestly I feel like a wreck. I don't remember feeling this way in the past, usually my worst moments peaked 1-3 but today is something different entirely. The idea of a pinch just sounds like a great time; but I realize that one of these days I'm going to have to quit and I'm this deep in the hole as is.
Pretty much I'm just rambling but its kept me from running to the store so far. I feel worthless and have pretty much spent the past few days self examining and deconstructing myself so low that I feel like dipping is the least of my problems and I can continue dipping until I get my life on track.
I know this habit is going to be the death of me, I'd dip a can in 4 pinches and leave each massive pinch in my mouth for about an hour or so at a time. My back and neck hurt all the time and I experience acute jaw pain.
In summation:
Fuck, I have a headache. Someone remind me why i'm doing this shit? I swear normally I'm decently articulate but today is just something else. Feels pretty bad. I've quit in the past for weeks at a time but never quite felt like this. If I relapse this time its going to be months before I try again.
Some may come along and point out quite a few things which should concern you about your above post. I will not.
I will tell you that I understand. I was you One thousand seven hundrend and seventy one days ago. You can't imagine how great things will get. Hell, you would not believe me if I tried to tell you.
Check the welcome center in the upper right corner of your screen.
You can do this.
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I've been dipping since around age 14 and I'm currently 22 now. I started dipping a can or more a day everyday at around age 19 and have started realizing this crazy train needs to end.
I really enjoy dipping, I'm trying to convince myself that its merely that I'm addicting to the habit and its a crutch of comfort. Right now I'm barely hanging in there.
I'm on day 5 this time and honestly I feel like a wreck. I don't remember feeling this way in the past, usually my worst moments peaked 1-3 but today is something different entirely. The idea of a pinch just sounds like a great time; but I realize that one of these days I'm going to have to quit and I'm this deep in the hole as is.
Pretty much I'm just rambling but its kept me from running to the store so far. I feel worthless and have pretty much spent the past few days self examining and deconstructing myself so low that I feel like dipping is the least of my problems and I can continue dipping until I get my life on track.
I know this habit is going to be the death of me, I'd dip a can in 4 pinches and leave each massive pinch in my mouth for about an hour or so at a time. My back and neck hurt all the time and I experience acute jaw pain.
In summation:
Fuck, I have a headache. Someone remind me why i'm doing this shit? I swear normally I'm decently articulate but today is just something else. Feels pretty bad. I've quit in the past for weeks at a time but never quite felt like this. If I relapse this time its going to be months before I try again.
Some may come along and point out quite a few things which should concern you about your above post. I will not.
I will tell you that I understand. I was you One thousand seven hundrend and seventy one days ago. You can't imagine how great things will get. Hell, you would not believe me if I tried to tell you.
Check the welcome center in the upper right corner of your screen.
You can do this.
We don't try, we fuckin do. You're not addicted to the habit your addicted to the nicotine. What you're feeling is normal, its called the suck/fog, it ends and gets a shit ton better. Balls up man, if this quitting thing was easy everyone would do it. The pussies belong on the other side of the fence, dipping. Where do you stand? Are you committed?
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Yeah man its blows.
I know the moment if I were to get a dip and put it in the feelings would be short lived and then I'd find my whole entire week wasted. I got myself convinced that I really enjoy the habit but in reality I'm just a fucking nicotine junkie.
My main reason to quit is that the habit is progressive and that it's interfering with my weightlifting ambitions. Apparently when you reach a certain level of nicotine addiction your body is basically robbed of a majority of nutrients and thus making muscle growth exponentially more difficult.
My mother quit cig's after 35 years of smoking and shes 2 years clean and says she still misses smoking. It makes me wonder if I'm still going to be having not dipping on my mind long after I quit?
I was at the store last night and saw a product advertised for cigarettes that had me feeling a little shaken. The product was disposible filters you could place over the cigarettes so it had less tar. The product had in bold lettering "For Those Who Simply Cannot Quit"
Not that I'm one of those people but its quite frightening that some people can reach a point where they literally lose all the capability and will power to quit, and that product is advertising based on this concept. At any rate I hope I will start to feel better, Its not the headaches and all getting to me but that my mouth is watering missing its familar friend. An asshole of a friend indeed.
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Good luck man. I am at the end of day 2 and it is hell but I have been trying to occupy myself with other things. I hate cleaning but my apartment is spotless right now. I dont know what the maid is going to do tomorrow. lol. Just hang in there we can all do this together. My biggest challenge will be tomorrow at work. Everyone in my work group dips smokes or does both.
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Good luck man. I am at the end of day 2 and it is hell but I have been trying to occupy myself with other things. I hate cleaning but my apartment is spotless right now. I dont know what the maid is going to do tomorrow. lol. Just hang in there we can all do this together.
Guys -
Got the right idea but the wrong way to show the support.
There is no luck when it comes to quitting. You need to wake in the morning and promise yourself that you will not use for that day. Then you promise us here on KTC that you will not use for that same day. Then keep your word.
When you wake the next, you make the same promise.
There is no luck when it comes to that. What does come is my word to you that I am quit. And that I am available with an ear, or whatever you may need to help keep you quit.
As I am quit today and will make that promise when I wake in the morning.
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Hmmm. This does not sound good. You might be a weight lifter but you sound weak ass hell. Nic can do that to you. Sounds like you are giving up you're soft and cuddly puppy dog and not a posion that is as addictive as heroine, can control your life, drain your pockets, fuck up your gums, rot your teeth, gives you shit breath, makes you look like a tool with a big bump of cat shit in your lip as you spit into a bottle and oh yeah can give you cancer and kill you. You gotta build up some hate for the shit and stop glamorising it.
You're coming at this all wrong and you're attitude blows. You are only looking at the negative things that come from quitting. Thats not good. You're almost talking yourself into failure and I am here to tell you that the positives of quitting FAR outweigh the negatives, but you wont believe me 5 days in. Hell, I didn't believe people when they told me that for about 2-1/2 months...but its true.
Imagine a day when you are no longer a slave to nicotine, where you hardly even think about it and when you do you think "thank God I don't do that shit anymore". That feeling is 1,000,000 better than the feeling of loading up another dip. 4 pinches empties a can? Those pinches must be HUGE and does leaving that shit in for over an hour really feel that good? You think it relaxes you but it doesn't. The only thing it does is relieve the pang of addiction for more nicotine. Think about it, when you have a dip in you probably wish you didn't and when you don't have one in you probably wish you did. Think about that for a minute...that's fucked up...that's ADDICTION at its finest.
Also nobody CANT quit, its just that they CHOOSE not to quit. I could go on for days here but I wont.
You joined the site so I assume you are serious about quitting. You need an attitude adjustment though, and this site and the people on it can provide it, but if you don't want to accept it the there is little hope for you. Use this site, READ, read the hof speeches, the words of wisdom, the what to expect when you quit, read how nicotine addiction works on your brain. There's info on this site about that as well as off this site. Post roll and get involved with your March quit group. Exchange numbers, jump into live chat, pm people if you have specific questions. DO SOMETHING!!!! Don't just sit around whallowing in how bad quitting will suck. That's torture and that's what I did. I'm not 100% cured and I still get craves now and then but as time goes on they get weaker and easier to dismiss. Don't worry about how you will feel 2 yrs from now. Just worry about today. I will tell you that if in 2 years you're still quit you will feel a million times better than you do today.
You can do this shit...IF you really want to. We're here for you. Pm me anytime if you have any questions and get a better attitude. Sorry this is so long but I really want you to succeed and would write 200 pages if I knew it would help you. Anybody on this site would.
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Seriously man this is pretty fucked. The first 3 days were decent enough, had time off work so I just slept and went through the motions. Now day 5 I'm getting hit with more anticipation just general anger. I feel like I could explode but its an interesting concept because emotionally I'm not angry but physically I'm on the verge.
My body isn't even craving a dip its just sitting here befuddled with a WTF feeling. I can't sleep right now as my restlessness is through the roof. I would dip a can in 3 pinches, throw in a fat chew and leave it there for an hour and a half. Pinhead stuff.
You know I'm feeling bad if I actually took the time to log in and post
edit:2nd time attempting to quit that's why my account is so old.
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Now someone get in here so I can yell at you and belittle you. Bring me a democrat. (Trying to keep a sense of humor is important)
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Now someone get in here so I can yell at you and belittle you. Bring me a democrat. (Trying to keep a sense of humor is important)
hey just remember one day at a time and you can pm me anytime you want to scream I will be your punching bag a friend of mine sportsfan quote is stick around become friends keep the quit going
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Dorsettr, What happened the first time you tried to quit? Did you make it past 5 days? It looks like your previous intro from last year had some very wise responses. Take a look at it. Either way, you are deep in the "suck" or "fog" or whatever you want to call it. It's not pleasant and it's looks like you are in raging ass hole mode. It's better than having a dip in.
Just remember this feeling, it's the nicotine trying to pull you back under it's spell. Don't look back. The first 2 weeks suck. There is no way around it. One thing is for sure though, each day gets better. Take your quit one day at a time and stick around. This
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Seriously man this is pretty fucked. The first 3 days were decent enough, had time off work so I just slept and went through the motions. Now day 5 I'm getting hit with more anticipation just general anger. I feel like I could explode but its an interesting concept because emotionally I'm not angry but physically I'm on the verge.
My body isn't even craving a dip its just sitting here befuddled with a WTF feeling. I can't sleep right now as my restlessness is through the roof. I would dip a can in 3 pinches, throw in a fat chew and leave it there for an hour and a half. Pinhead stuff.
You know I'm feeling bad if I actually took the time to log in and post
edit:2nd time attempting to quit that's why my account is so old.
If you want this quit to stick go post roll, looks like you never posted roll last time. Man up and give us your promise or this will likely be another attempt. This site doesn't have a magic quit button you can come in here, push n then be miraculously quit. No sir,,,,, if you quit this weed you will have earned it,,,, and it's fucking hard to do. It's like a walk through hells gate, but it's also the only path to freedom. And it is worth it. My advice is to go post roll, read all you can on this site, drink the cool-aid and build up a quit foundation and do this. Your young, you'll be glad you did this, as unbelievable as that sounds right now while in the suck.
I am not a democrat but feel free to yell at me! We know where you are and yes it sucks lol, but it's doable. Thousands have quit using this site, so can you if you'll follow the program.
Go read the info in your original thread, both Diesel and SirDerick said some good shit that you failed to take heed to. This is a decision you make, only you can decide to dip, so how bad do you want to quit? Go post roll, and I will quit with you.
Erussell 207 days of freedom!
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Go all in this time man. This place just can't help you with a quick band-aide. You really want to stay quit...read up, ask questions on what we do, how we do it, and what we expect of one another. Then post roll.
Half ass won't work brother. You want some support, join us. PM me if you have any questions.
You can do this. It's just a matter of if you're gonna chose to do this.
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Pull your head out of your ass and decide if you really WANT this.
You used willpower to get through the first 3 days and now it's setting in that, "FUUUUCCKKK this shit is gonna be a battle, this shit is gonna be hard, this shit is gonna fuck my ass up for awhile. Do I want to do it???? Can I do it??? I'm not sure, I just want rip the head off of someone!!!"
This is where the cream either rises or you cream your jeans as you continue to finger hump the can.
Don't treat the site as a last resort..."you know I'm feeling bad if I actually took the time to log in and post".
What the fuck does that mean?
If you are serious about quitting, get your ass to role and post your promise every day that you won't give in to the nic bitch for that day and start the ball rolling. You feel bad, are craving, are raging, have a question, then come here. That's what the site if for. It's not a last resort.
Get close to the guys in your group, get some numbers, do some reading, jump in chat, read outside the site, fucking do SOMETHING!!!! Don't just sit on your ass and expect quitting to all the sudden become easy. It don't fucking work like that.
Also, the affordable healthcare act is the greatest thing ever invented.
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Pull your head out of your ass and decide if you really WANT this.
You used willpower to get through the first 3 days and now it's setting in that, "FUUUUCCKKK this shit is gonna be a battle, this shit is gonna be hard, this shit is gonna fuck my ass up for awhile. Do I want to do it???? Can I do it??? I'm not sure, I just want rip the head off of someone!!!"
This is where the cream either rises or you cream your jeans as you continue to finger hump the can.
Don't treat the site as a last resort..."you know I'm feeling bad if I actually took the time to log in and post".
What the fuck does that mean?
If you are serious about quitting, get your ass to role and post your promise every day that you won't give in to the nic bitch for that day and start the ball rolling. You feel bad, are craving, are raging, have a question, then come here. That's what the site if for. It's not a last resort.
Get close to the guys in your group, get some numbers, do some reading, jump in chat, read outside the site, fucking do SOMETHING!!!! Don't just sit on your ass and expect quitting to all the sudden become easy. It don't fucking work like that.
Also, the affordable healthcare act is the greatest thing ever invented.
Ditto Diesel,
Get your ass over and post roll call, take caving off the table today as an option.
Quitters find a way to stay quit today, cavers find a way to cave. Which one will you choose, because it is a choice. We can only promise that it will get better, but as Skoal Monster likes to say, "It will suck until it doesn't, then it won't."
Check your inbox for my number if you need support.
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Pull your head out of your ass and decide if you really WANT this.
You used willpower to get through the first 3 days and now it's setting in that, "FUUUUCCKKK this shit is gonna be a battle, this shit is gonna be hard, this shit is gonna fuck my ass up for awhile. Do I want to do it???? Can I do it???  I'm not sure, I just want rip the head off of someone!!!"
This is where the cream either rises or you cream your jeans as you continue to finger hump the can.
Don't treat the site as a last resort..."you know I'm feeling bad if I actually took the time to log in and post".
What the fuck does that mean?
If you are serious about quitting, get your ass to role and post your promise every day that you won't give in to the nic bitch for that day and start the ball rolling. You feel bad, are craving, are raging, have a question, then come here. That's what the site if for. It's not a last resort.
Get close to the guys in your group, get some numbers, do some reading, jump in chat, read outside the site, fucking do SOMETHING!!!! Don't just sit on your ass and expect quitting to all the sudden become easy. It don't fucking work like that.
Also, the affordable healthcare act is the greatest thing ever invented.
Ditto Diesel,
Get your ass over and post roll call, take caving off the table today as an option.
Quitters find a way to stay quit today, cavers find a way to cave. Which one will you choose, because it is a choice. We can only promise that it will get better, but as Skoal Monster likes to say, "It will suck until it doesn't, then it won't."
Check your inbox for my number if you need support.
Listen to these two, they have blazed a trail for you to follow.
It gets tough when you think too far in the future. Tomorrow is too far. Never quit or worry about quitting tomorrow, next week, next month, 100 days from now or forever!
You are an addict and as such, your brain cannot process the thought of never dipping again so it gets harder if that is your mindset. Just like a diabetic that can't imagine never having any sugar again. It just makes it more difficult.
Yesterday was a win but its over. Today is all you have to worry about. Tomorrow never comes. Quit and fight today. Get your mind off thinking you are quit forever. You only quit when its today!!!!!
Its still hard but that strategy is a winning mindset. Fuck find the joy in being quit too! That skank ass whore doesn't tell you what to do anymore! You kicked her to the curb and she wants you to hurt. She is a parasite and by not being the host body, she wants you dead.
You declared war. Now enjoy the pain and smile. If it hurts ask her to hurt you more. You'll soon see that the heat she brings....soon enough will tickle. You think, "Is that all you got, Bitch!"
It is a fight and I am not denying it. I went through what you are going through and I never ever want to do it again but you need to embrace the suck and love the war! If it hurts and you keep that shit out of your mouth, that is the price and sacrifice to win your freedom to choose back!
Don't let this bitch win. Get laughing more than you cry. I wish you were here with me. I would show you my penis and you would laugh and realize that you don't have it that bad.
Just get through today. We will be with you and worry about tomorrow when it gets here but tomorrow doesn't matter until you win today's battle.
Fucking knock that bitch out and deal with the aches and pain. You are healing and it hurts to heal.
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This kid is funny.
He ain't ready. Maybe he never will be... Probably finger humping the can again.
Prove me wrong, kid.
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This kid is funny.
He ain't ready. Maybe he never will be... Probably finger humping the can again.
Prove me wrong, kid.
When you think the worst it happens. Quit being a little bitch and take your life back. Positive attitude is the only way. When your nuts finally drop and you find your bravado come back and quit like you mean it.
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Where you at, Bro??????