KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum

Community => Introductions => Topic started by: siren on July 01, 2016, 02:07:00 PM

Title: Intro
Post by: siren on July 01, 2016, 02:07:00 PM
Hello everybody,

Been dipping for about 8 years with varying degrees of intensity. Steady on that Grizzly LCW. Started a new job in November: 5:00pm-1:30am M-F on my ass in silence staring at a computer while I finished my last semester. I live with my Gf who doesn't put up with it, so I'm sneaking when I can. But mostly do all my dipping at work, about 1.5-2 cans a night. It's a complete binge since I'm dry all morning and afternoon. And it fucking sucks.

Anyway, I just graduated and should be starting a new role within 2-4 weeks. Need to be quit for this new role. And for my girl bc I'm an asshole to her way too frequently and hate that I'm lying - or at least not telling the truth - about this habit. Waiting and wanting for her to leave so I can throw one in, making sure she calls when she's on the way home. Stepping out to "make a(n abnormally long) phone call". Total slave to the nic.

I'm writing mostly because I'm dying for a fucking lip right now. Gotta get up here so I can be held accountable. Day 2 is scary because it's about as far as I ever get. I'll be hitting the seeds hard at work tonight. Luckily, I'm somewhat used to the headaches and fogginess it's how I spend the better part of most weekends

Look forward to meeting you guys and keeping quit
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: DjPorkchop on July 01, 2016, 02:33:00 PM
Welcome to the fog man. Does it feel good? No, it fucking sucks major ass! I needyou to do me a favor and remember how you felt when you FIRST spit out that cat shit and how you are felling now. I know if feels like fucking shit. Remember that feeling so you never have to do it ever again. You badly need to get in to your quit group topic/11679548/23/ (http://forum.killthecan.org/topic/11679548/23/) and give an introduction and tell them what you are about and what got you here and all that good shit. Post your day number 2 for example of thats what today really is. Posting roll is the only price of admission we have at this place.

What does posting roll do? You give your promise to not only your group of brothers/sisters of quit but to YOUR SELF that you will remain nic free but for today. We will worry about tomorrow when it gets here. WUPP: Wake up, piss, post in that exact order every day. It dont do no good to post at 9:30 in the evening. That is what we call a status update. Please save those for Twitter and Facebook.

Exchange numbers with people in your quit group as well as this post. It is a VERY important thing in a moment of weakness. Scared to give out your number? Yeah so were THOUSANDS of other but we all survived to tell about it.

Eat the fuck out of seeds, fake chew what ever it takes but do not dip. No nic at all as a matter of fact. No stoagies, cigs, dip, lozenges, patches, or gum. Afterall, that is part of your daily roll/promise here.

Get up and go walk, jog, run , hike. Do what you got to do to get over the craves. Drink LOTS of water. And rememer, the more water you drink the quicker you flush the toxins out of your self.

Don't know how to post roll? here is a link https://youtu.be/RmDgTPJ6HyM (https://youtu.be/RmDgTPJ6HyM)

So go ahead man, jump on in and take a drink of the Kool-Aid. It is fucking awesome to say the very least. And do me a favor, don't get butt hurt ifyou see something you don't like. There are many assholes here and for a very good reason AND there are some really awesome people too. They care! It pissed me off royally at first and then one day Ahhh hah set in and I understood. Use this place like a smorgasboard. Take what you want and leave the rest for others.

Take care brother and I quit with you today!

Ray - 289
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: KingNothing on July 01, 2016, 02:44:00 PM
Brother Ray has you hooked up here siren. This shit isn't easy at first. However, I can promise you that after awhile you will wonder what the hell took you so long to quit. You are being shrouded by nicotine. You live in a constant state of withdrawal from nicotine during the day anyway. Nicotine has taken more from you than you can hope to contemplate right now.

However, there is hope. Bit by bit and day by day, you will gain an understanding of how addicted you truly were to a carcinogenic plant in a can. The thought of even grabbing a pinch out of a can makes me sick to my stomach right now. I've been quit just short of a year and I can tell you that my life has become immeasurably better than it was when my life revolved around my next dip.

I bet you ran errands for your girl to throw one in too, right? Did you ever buy her flowers at the store, only to get enough cash back to buy a can for you? How about staying up late to watch TV or play video games after she went to bed to cram a couple extra in before bed? I'm sure you took the obligatory 30 minutes in the bathroom on occasion. Took the dogs for a walk. Blah blah blah. We've been there man. We escaped though. How? By taking it one day at a time and putting as much effort into quitting as we did into dipping/hiding.

It's possible. It's actually really simple too. It's not always easy, but I promise you it's worth it. Trust us. Trust the KTC way and get on the horse. You will never ever regret it.
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: wildirish317 on July 01, 2016, 03:28:00 PM
Just quit today. Don't worry about tomorrow. Quit for the rest of today. Anyone can do that. So can you.

Tomorrow, come back here and we'll do it again.
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: DjPorkchop on July 01, 2016, 03:46:00 PM
Quote from: wildirish317
Just quit today. Don't worry about tomorrow. Quit for the rest of today. Anyone can do that. So can you.

Tomorrow, come back here and we'll do it again.
Serious words of truth right there!! ^^^^^

All each one of us have is but 24 hours in a day. Lets just promise and do it but for today and worry about tomorrow tomorrow.
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: siren on July 01, 2016, 03:58:00 PM
Thanks fellas. A lot of great stuff out here everywhere I turn and King you hit the nail on the head, brother.

Girl's been gone since 12:30pm. Normally I'd be relishing this opportunity. Can't keep myself busy enough....

Ray - "Does it feel good? No, it fucking sucks major ass!" you said it man, appreciate the words of support and the tall glass of Kool-Aid.
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: KingNothing on July 01, 2016, 04:11:00 PM
Quote from: siren
Thanks fellas. A lot of great stuff out here everywhere I turn and King you hit the nail on the head, brother.

Girl's been gone since 12:30pm. Normally I'd be relishing this opportunity. Can't keep myself busy enough....

Ray - "Does it feel good? No, it fucking sucks major ass!" you said it man, appreciate the words of support and the tall glass of Kool-Aid.
Which reminds me:

'coolshades
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: kubiackalpha on July 01, 2016, 04:50:00 PM
If you have to go minute by minute then that is what needs to happen. Nothing wrong with that. We have all had that kind of struggle before. i say that without even knowing all of the bad ass quitters on this site. Beyond that. Get yourself a couple gallons of water. It will help with the Suck. Do a bit of excersize. You got this. And, if you networked right, we can and will help you. Get some bad ass quitters numbers. Quit on!



Just for today, Self.
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: siren on August 17, 2016, 02:14:00 PM
About a month and a half ago I had a bit of an epiphany. My life was about to take a significant turn (for the better, I hoped) and I needed to be prepared mentally for the challenges that lay ahead. The last three weeks or so have been one of the most trying and - ultimately - rewarding stretches of my life.

Back in May I walked with my graduating class. It took me six years. Not something I'm particularly proud of, and it's in fact a bit of a soft spot for me - something I'm quick to become defensive over. What should have taken just four years took an additional two. What's more, I had five credits remaining to be officially graduated, so my walk in May would be validated only upon further completion of additional coursework. I took two simple online one-credit courses, but my anxiety was to kick in late July. My final class was a three week online upper level political economics course where I would be reading five (pretty damn heavy) books and write four papers (35 pages total) in three weeks. I also work nights (5pm - 1:30am) and moved the weekend of August 1st.

Multiple over the last 3-4 weeks I felt like quitting - at a much greater frequency than the first month or so. Mind games became increasingly mind-blowing and at times I had cravings I hadn't had since I began this quit. Anxiety was enormous and everyday seemed like the most important day of my life. I could hardly concentrate on plowing through my schoolwork and struggled to stay on task at work. Simple requests from my girlfriend were met with disdain on my behalf. There were a few instances I thought she was beginning to regret signing a new lease with me.

Flash forward to this week. Yesterday I received final marks for my summer classes. They were sufficient to propel me just north of a 3.3 GPA, such that I can officially graduate with Latin honors, cum laude. About an hour ago I just verbally accepted a position with a major international corporation with full benefits and a staggering increase in salary. Not to mention tomorrow I will be half way to HOF.

Back to the epiphany. Along with needing to quit for my girlfriend, the reason I have been successful thus far in this quit is because I decided to quit for me. I can't stress it enough. I knew that I didn't want to be fiending for lips or sneaking off into the abyss to pack my face once I got out there in the "real world". Not to mention before I started this, I had become a 1.5 to 2-can a day dipper and it was draining my wallet and mental fortitude. I could justify killing myself far easier than getting my shit together. But I both wanted and needed to change.

I owe far more thanks than could ever be given to all you assholes. Vets: especially dipbegone, waste, sutherngntlman, and King - fuck you all and thank you all for keeping me honest. The support in the early days kept me hanging around. And all you clowns of Rocktober gave me plenty reading material during the darker times. It's weird to thank a bunch of strangers from every cohort and country around the world for saving my life, but that's what I'll at least attempt to do here.

Tomorrow's half a floor. I plan on sticking around a while if that's alright with y'all

ODAAT 'oh yeah'
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: jswiss11 on August 18, 2016, 10:20:00 AM
^^ BAD ASS ^^
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: Armydan13 on August 28, 2016, 08:46:00 PM
Siren,

I hope you look back at this intro you posted. You seemed so committed to your quit; it sucks that we lost you in our quit group...I hope you get back on the horse and post another Day 1 - You know all the October brothers will be rooting for you.

-Dan
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: Backwoods901 on August 28, 2016, 09:21:00 PM
Start by getting in your group and answering the three questions:
1) What happened?
2) Why did it happen?
3) What are you going to do so it doesn't happen again?


I hope you answer these then make your way back and start over again in your quit i will be here for you with everyone else
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: pab1964 on August 28, 2016, 09:48:00 PM
Damn........Just.........Damn! Get your ass back in here! Your last post was talking about how you were getting your life in order don't be a slave to that bitch again!
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: pky1520 on August 28, 2016, 10:24:00 PM
What a shame you threw all of that out the window.

The good news is that it's not too late to start over. You will have an uphill battle, but it is always an uphill battle.

I hope to see you in December.
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: AppleJack on August 28, 2016, 10:54:00 PM
Lame.

I "hope" you can "try" harder this time.

Own it.
One and done.
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: JB65 on August 31, 2016, 09:07:00 PM
A L C O H O L

How many times has a vet said stay away from the booze.

I'd Wish you better luck this time, but it wouldn't matter. You'll probably cave at the fantasy BASKETBALL draft.

Prove me wrong bro. I hope you do. I really do. Recommit. Rewire the mind. Be a leader and earn some respect.
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: FLLipOut on October 25, 2016, 09:34:00 AM
'party' Congrats on Half a HOF, siren! 'chew2'
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: danojeno on December 10, 2016, 02:02:00 PM
Caved again. Shocker.
Title: Re: Intro
Post by: pab1964 on December 11, 2016, 02:25:00 PM
Uh bye bye!