KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum

Community => Introductions => Topic started by: GamerOnWheelz on September 19, 2011, 08:31:00 PM

Title: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: GamerOnWheelz on September 19, 2011, 08:31:00 PM
Hello! I have been a dipper for 17 years +  I am on my 7th day Quit. I have been trying to help spread the message about KTC on Twitter, Facebook  word of mouth. So, I am challenging everyone to post in not just the roll call posts but also on Facebook  Twitter telling everyone you know about the change you have made to improve yourself to be dip free! Hopefully by posting on the two social media sites it will encourage others to quit the dip  take their lives back. So start posting  making a difference in someone's life!
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: brainsore on September 19, 2011, 09:18:00 PM
Gamerwheelz,
Nice motivation there , I'm sure you have found your way to your quit month and posted by now .
A week is great and you seem strong in your quit . So sorry I don't use twitter or F.B , but I get my message out daily and try my best to get other dippers / smokers around me to give up their addiction . I have yet to get one to quit with me but eventually they will be here with us .
brainsore
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Souliman on September 19, 2011, 09:48:00 PM
Gamer that's really cool man. I'm real happy to hear you doing your best to save peoples lives. There is one place I would suggest you add to your places to spread the word of your quit. I've been using this place as a soap box for my quit for just about 300 days now. Check it out: Great Orange Panties On Sexy Tarts Riding On Large Lizards (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5162). YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED. Tell'em the "Old Horny Soul" sent ya.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Radman on September 20, 2011, 10:50:00 AM
Quote from: Souliman
Gamer that's really cool man. I'm real happy to hear you doing your best to save peoples lives. There is one place I would suggest you add to your places to spread the word of your quit. I've been using this place as a soap box for my quit for just about 300 days now. Check it out: Great Orange Panties On Sexy Tarts Riding On Large Lizards (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5162). YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED. Tell'em the "Old Horny Soul" sent ya.
Soul, you freaking rock, man.

Follow this advice, Gamer.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: dabean22 on November 15, 2013, 07:16:00 PM
On 12/21/2011 you posted your HOF speach. Today you posted roll for "Day 2". You have over 700 posts to your name but almost no information on your intro page. As someone that is on day 104 I don't know who you are or what your story is but instead of making me hunt your old group down and figure it out on my own, why don't you spell it out for everyone. (And post roll in the right group while you are at it. November is for people reaching their 100th day in November. You belong in February '13.)

What went wrong?

How did it happen?

What are you going to do differently to prevent it from happening again?

These 3 questions are the cost of coming back to the group. You reached HOF before so this shouldn't be any surprise to you. Come on man. Show us your balls. (figuratively)
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Wt57 on November 15, 2013, 08:11:00 PM
??? There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here. 795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774


What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: AppleJack on November 15, 2013, 08:24:00 PM
Your story has HUGE holes in it.

Fill in the gaps.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Ace121x on November 15, 2013, 11:25:00 PM
I consider this to be SPAM!!
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Wt57 on November 16, 2013, 10:24:00 AM
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: dabean22 on November 16, 2013, 05:29:00 PM
Wow, you posted day 3 today but you are still posting roll IN THE WRONG GROUP!! We are all celebrating our HOF month after being quit 100 days and you are posting day 3 without reading a single word of whats being said? Get your head out your ass and look around. You need to actually read and figure out where you should be posting roll. Then you need to actually get involved. You didn't reply toy message. What the fuck are you doing here if you aren't bothering to read what others post, respond to messages written or give your phone number to those around you.

If that's the best you can do, Good Luck. You'll need it.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: RAZD611 on November 16, 2013, 06:02:00 PM
Quote from: Wt57
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: TxTornadoinOK on November 16, 2013, 06:05:00 PM
I am so confused. :blink:
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: RAZD611 on November 16, 2013, 06:10:00 PM
Quote from: TxTornadoinOK
I am so confused. :blink:
:blink:

Gamer has caved since Oct 27. Tried to sneak back in without posting an explination or anything.

;)
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: TxTornadoinOK on November 16, 2013, 06:19:00 PM
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: TxTornadoinOK
I am so confused. :blink:
:blink:

Gamer has caved since Oct 27. Tried to sneak back in without posting an explination or anything.

;)
Can I just say, Ah Hell no! You don't get to sneak.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: RAZD611 on November 16, 2013, 06:28:00 PM
Quote from: TxTornadoinOK
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: TxTornadoinOK
I am so confused. :blink:
:blink:

Gamer has caved since Oct 27. Tried to sneak back in without posting an explination or anything.

;)
Can I just say, Ah Hell no! You don't get to sneak.
Atta Girl!!!
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: dabean22 on November 17, 2013, 10:00:00 AM
Quote
Quote
I posted this on your intro but wanted to PM it to you too just in case you don't check that page.


On 12/21/2011 you posted your HOF speach.   Today you posted roll for "Day 2".  You have over 700 posts to your name but almost no information on your intro page.  As someone that is on day 104 I don't know who you are or what your story is but instead of making me hunt your old group down and figure it out on my own, why don't you spell it out for everyone.  (And post roll in the right group while you are at it.  November is for people reaching their 100th day in November.  You belong in February '13.)

Sorry about that I will start posting on that one from now on.

What went wrong?

How did it happen?

What are you going to do differently to prevent it from happening again?

These 3 questions are the cost of coming back to the group.  You reached HOF before so this shouldn't be any surprise to you.  Come on man.  Show us your balls. (figuratively)
What went wrong? Honestly the nic bitch got the best of me.

How did it happen? My father passed way just recently. I know that's not a good excuse but I was under a lot off stress  I shouldn't of given into it.

What are you going to do differently to prevent it from happening again? I'm going to be a bigger man  not give into it next time. I only did it for 3 weeks but I know that isn't a very good excuse either but I've put myself back on track. Also it wasn't as hard to quit this time around because of the short period I used but again I really shouldn't have.
This was his reply to my first message. I'm fairly sure that he doesn't even remember that this page exists.

Dude, about your quit being easy, thats bull shit. The last few days may have been easier than the last time you stopped for a while but you should really try to realize something. Last time, you didn't quit, you just stopped for a while. You only quit ONCE. The reason I point this out is important. If you actually quit last time, nothing could have caused you to shove that weed back into your lip. I never make light of loosing anyone so please know that my heart goes out to you and your family for the loss of your father. That being said, you knew then and know now that nicotine didn't fix anything or make it better. The grief was the same. It was a distraction. Next time. Taking a hammer to your big toe would also be a distraction but much less addictive.
You are an addict plain and simple. You need to recognize that the nic bitch is about to put a whole bunch of ideas in your head to get you to crave again. When the physical withdrawal isn't that bad. Expect her to whisper in your ear instead if shouting in your face. You need to give and get phone numbers from the people in your group especially but my number will be in your in-box as soon as I finish this. If you are actually serious about quitting, make sure I get your number.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: CaliforniaSlim on November 18, 2013, 07:40:00 PM
Quote from: dabean22
Quote
Quote
I posted this on your intro but wanted to PM it to you too just in case you don't check that page.


On 12/21/2011 you posted your HOF speach.   Today you posted roll for "Day 2".  You have over 700 posts to your name but almost no information on your intro page.  As someone that is on day 104 I don't know who you are or what your story is but instead of making me hunt your old group down and figure it out on my own, why don't you spell it out for everyone.  (And post roll in the right group while you are at it.  November is for people reaching their 100th day in November.  You belong in February '13.)

Sorry about that I will start posting on that one from now on.

What went wrong?

How did it happen?

What are you going to do differently to prevent it from happening again?

These 3 questions are the cost of coming back to the group.  You reached HOF before so this shouldn't be any surprise to you.  Come on man.  Show us your balls. (figuratively)
What went wrong? Honestly the nic bitch got the best of me.

How did it happen? My father passed way just recently. I know that's not a good excuse but I was under a lot off stress  I shouldn't of given into it.

What are you going to do differently to prevent it from happening again? I'm going to be a bigger man  not give into it next time. I only did it for 3 weeks but I know that isn't a very good excuse either but I've put myself back on track. Also it wasn't as hard to quit this time around because of the short period I used but again I really shouldn't have.
This was his reply to my first message. I'm fairly sure that he doesn't even remember that this page exists.

Dude, about your quit being easy, thats bull shit. The last few days may have been easier than the last time you stopped for a while but you should really try to realize something. Last time, you didn't quit, you just stopped for a while. You only quit ONCE. The reason I point this out is important. If you actually quit last time, nothing could have caused you to shove that weed back into your lip. I never make light of loosing anyone so please know that my heart goes out to you and your family for the loss of your father. That being said, you knew then and know now that nicotine didn't fix anything or make it better. The grief was the same. It was a distraction. Next time. Taking a hammer to your big toe would also be a distraction but much less addictive.
You are an addict plain and simple. You need to recognize that the nic bitch is about to put a whole bunch of ideas in your head to get you to crave again. When the physical withdrawal isn't that bad. Expect her to whisper in your ear instead if shouting in your face. You need to give and get phone numbers from the people in your group especially but my number will be in your in-box as soon as I finish this. If you are actually serious about quitting, make sure I get your number.
Uh ya, those answers do not strike me as having the air of self examination that would lead to true understanding of how it happened or a confidence that it won't happen again. Those answers sound like a newbie, not a guy with 2 years of quit behind him.

--A terrible thing happened,
-- so I picked up chew because I was weak
-- I will be stronger next time.

When people aren't involved in this site, they miss out on true quit understanding, which eventually leads to a cave.

Life is going to throw some terrible shit at all of us. We have tools here at KTC to keep us quit; chat rooms, intro threads, quit groups, phone numbers, stories, HOF speeches... sheesh-- its a big freaking toolbox.

We fail on our own.

Promising to be stronger does not make one stronger.

Get involved friend... PM me and I will give you my number. After 2 years, if people here don't know who you are, you have been stalking the sidelines, it's time to man up and march on to the field, humbled by your cave and ready, but ready to play.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Evil_Won on November 24, 2013, 07:00:00 PM
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Wt57
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering
Still unanswered.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: ScrewYouCope on November 26, 2013, 03:53:00 PM
Gameronwheelz - WTF dude? I caved after 4 years and came back and gave weak ass answers! The group called me on it and I gave it some serious thought and came back and gave honest and sincere answers, at which point I was welcome back in with open arms. Now are you going to man up and re-answer the 3 questions sincerely or just keep sneaking in daily and posting without growing a set of balls and taking true ownership of what happened last time? I for one want to support you in your journey and would like your support, but first the 3 questions!
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Mthomas3824 on November 26, 2013, 04:59:00 PM
Quote from: Evil_Won
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Wt57
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering
Still unanswered.
Guard you quits. Day 1, Comma, 10 years....We are addicts.



PS: I don't like the word, "Weak" for reason to cave. I am weak and still quit.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Menace on November 29, 2013, 05:16:00 PM
GOW I am new to the KTC however since you are in my group I have to say that I am a bit curious about this as well. Looks like you were on cruise control brother and now you are only 2 days in front of this quitter. I am more than willing to be supportive of your quit bro and believe everyone has the right to be a quitter even if that is multiple times in your life. With that said I think the KTC playbook must work by all the evidence on here and you have some serious quitters calling you out and wanting to know WTF happened. I think you owe it to yourself and to us quitters in your group to provide an explanation. It might save one of us in the future. I gotta be honest it scares me that someone who had the time in that you did in as a quitter is now starting over. Maybe if you explain it to us we will know what to watch out for in our futures as quitters. You might know what caused the cave but your explaining will most likely help someone else on the cliff to + you might actually learn something yourself.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: RAZD611 on November 29, 2013, 07:57:00 PM
Quote from: Evil_Won
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Wt57
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering
Still unanswered.
You don't and won't get a pass. If I have to wear your ass out everyday till it appeers so be it.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: RAZD611 on December 02, 2013, 03:16:00 PM
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Evil_Won
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Wt57
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering
Still unanswered.
You don't and won't get a pass. If I have to wear your ass out everyday till it appeers so be it.
Still waiting sunshine.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Mthomas3824 on December 02, 2013, 04:50:00 PM
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Evil_Won
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Wt57
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering
Still unanswered.
You don't and won't get a pass. If I have to wear your ass out everyday till it appeers so be it.
Still waiting sunshine.
It's time for everyone to discover something as well. If agreeable I think there should be a 4th question going forward....

4. Did you have alcohol in your system at the time of your cave?

The fact is, most caves start with alcohol and then promises are forgotten or easily excused with a "Fuck it" impulse choice.

I am guessing that over 90% of caving past 45 days involves alcohol consumption.

I would like the 4th question to be part of the drill to see if there is a link to caving.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Doc2quit4good on December 02, 2013, 05:15:00 PM
Quote from: Mthomas3824
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Evil_Won
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Wt57
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering
Still unanswered.
You don't and won't get a pass. If I have to wear your ass out everyday till it appeers so be it.
Still waiting sunshine.
It's time for everyone to discover something as well. If agreeable I think there should be a 4th question going forward....

4. Did you have alcohol in your system at the time of your cave?

The fact is, most caves start with alcohol and then promises are forgotten or easily excused with a "Fuck it" impulse choice.

I am guessing that over 90% of caving past 45 days involves alcohol consumption.

I would like the 4th question to be part of the drill to see if there is a link to caving.
I agree, except it needs to be question 1! That way we could all cut through the bullshit and realize that the alcohol buzz and the nic buzz are pretty much the same thing. I am disheartened a little here. I am resolved to quit skoal and haven't had any for 76 days and then there is a guy who committed for so long then caved all of a sudden after a quit day number that I only dream about. I get the QODAAT philosophy now. DAMN!!! Nicotine sucks!!!!
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: T-Cell on December 02, 2013, 05:47:00 PM
Quote from: doc2quit4good
Quote from: Mthomas3824
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Evil_Won
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Wt57
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering
Still unanswered.
You don't and won't get a pass. If I have to wear your ass out everyday till it appeers so be it.
Still waiting sunshine.
It's time for everyone to discover something as well. If agreeable I think there should be a 4th question going forward....

4. Did you have alcohol in your system at the time of your cave?

The fact is, most caves start with alcohol and then promises are forgotten or easily excused with a "Fuck it" impulse choice.

I am guessing that over 90% of caving past 45 days involves alcohol consumption.

I would like the 4th question to be part of the drill to see if there is a link to caving.
I agree, except it needs to be question 1! That way we could all cut through the bullshit and realize that the alcohol buzz and the nic buzz are pretty much the same thing. I am disheartened a little here. I am resolved to quit skoal and haven't had any for 76 days and then there is a guy who committed for so long then caved all of a sudden after a quit day number that I only dream about. I get the QODAAT philosophy now. DAMN!!! Nicotine sucks!!!!
Apparently it is now cool to just ignore everyone you don't want to deal with on this board. How nice for the cavers, they can just ignore all of the peer and self-accountability that makes this place work!
Still waiting for answers...
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: J2b on December 02, 2013, 05:47:00 PM
Quote from: doc2quit4good
Quote from: Mthomas3824
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Evil_Won
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Wt57
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering
Still unanswered.
You don't and won't get a pass. If I have to wear your ass out everyday till it appeers so be it.
Still waiting sunshine.
It's time for everyone to discover something as well. If agreeable I think there should be a 4th question going forward....

4. Did you have alcohol in your system at the time of your cave?

The fact is, most caves start with alcohol and then promises are forgotten or easily excused with a "Fuck it" impulse choice.

I am guessing that over 90% of caving past 45 days involves alcohol consumption.

I would like the 4th question to be part of the drill to see if there is a link to caving.
I agree, except it needs to be question 1! That way we could all cut through the bullshit and realize that the alcohol buzz and the nic buzz are pretty much the same thing. I am disheartened a little here. I am resolved to quit skoal and haven't had any for 76 days and then there is a guy who committed for so long then caved all of a sudden after a quit day number that I only dream about. I get the QODAAT philosophy now. DAMN!!! Nicotine sucks!!!!
Who cares if there was alcohol involved? Not to say it isnt a factor in many caves, but honestly its not the reason for a cave and is not acceptable as an excuse.

I have had plenty of alcohol in my system since I decided "no more nic." Before and after HOF. I have been around smokers, chewers, and cigars. I have been around those with groups of people that have no link to this site, and no knowledge that I quit 1,044 days ago (or whatever the day count is). I could have pulled a PaddyMac or a GOW or any other "shit guys, I got drunk and a cigarette/chew/snuss/cigar just magically appeared in my mouth; guess I am back at day 1 but this time is different cause I mean it" bullshit caver nonsense.

But I have not, and I will not. I give my word every damn day. More importantly, I made a choice 1,044 days ago that I am damn tired of being a slave. Every day when I give my word, I am free from those bonds. Never again, for any reason, will I use nicotine. I have been through the birth of my son, the ICU for my son (2x), my father's hospitalization and death, friends deaths, football games, baseball games, tailgates, drunken HS reunions, vacations, long drives, shitty weather, sleep deprivation, bowling, yardwork, and pretty much everything else. I have been black out drunk and stone sober. Occasionally a craving hits, and sometimes they linger like a fart in the shower, but ultimately my word means something to me.

No, dont even give the semblance of a alcohol being an even close to acceptable reason for caving. Its a bullshit excuse for those with weak resolve and shows a lack of testicular fortitude. Either quit or don't, life will keep on throwing the good and bad at you. Make the decisions you need to make to defend your quit, have a plan, and give your word as a bond.

Alcohol cannot make you cave. And I dont really give a shit if you were drunk when you did cave. Its irrelevant.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Mthomas3824 on December 02, 2013, 07:04:00 PM
Quote from: jost2brown
Quote from: doc2quit4good
Quote from: Mthomas3824
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Evil_Won
Quote from: razd611
Quote from: Wt57
Quote from: Wt57
???  There is a shit load of explaining needs to be done here.

RQ D-2 will want to here.  795 days would look much better than 2 days
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - 774
What goes between these 2 posts?????
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz Posted:
GamerOnWheelz - Day 2 
Cavers coming clean get trashed while slipping in and starting over with no explanation goes totally ignored. 'Crazy'
GOW you got some serious esplianing to do. You know better and you know the drill.

1.
2.
3.

Start answering
Still unanswered.
You don't and won't get a pass. If I have to wear your ass out everyday till it appeers so be it.
Still waiting sunshine.
It's time for everyone to discover something as well. If agreeable I think there should be a 4th question going forward....

4. Did you have alcohol in your system at the time of your cave?

The fact is, most caves start with alcohol and then promises are forgotten or easily excused with a "Fuck it" impulse choice.

I am guessing that over 90% of caving past 45 days involves alcohol consumption.

I would like the 4th question to be part of the drill to see if there is a link to caving.
I agree, except it needs to be question 1! That way we could all cut through the bullshit and realize that the alcohol buzz and the nic buzz are pretty much the same thing. I am disheartened a little here. I am resolved to quit skoal and haven't had any for 76 days and then there is a guy who committed for so long then caved all of a sudden after a quit day number that I only dream about. I get the QODAAT philosophy now. DAMN!!! Nicotine sucks!!!!
Who cares if there was alcohol involved? Not to say it isnt a factor in many caves, but honestly its not the reason for a cave and is not acceptable as an excuse.

I have had plenty of alcohol in my system since I decided "no more nic." Before and after HOF. I have been around smokers, chewers, and cigars. I have been around those with groups of people that have no link to this site, and no knowledge that I quit 1,044 days ago (or whatever the day count is). I could have pulled a PaddyMac or a GOW or any other "shit guys, I got drunk and a cigarette/chew/snuss/cigar just magically appeared in my mouth; guess I am back at day 1 but this time is different cause I mean it" bullshit caver nonsense.

But I have not, and I will not. I give my word every damn day. More importantly, I made a choice 1,044 days ago that I am damn tired of being a slave. Every day when I give my word, I am free from those bonds. Never again, for any reason, will I use nicotine. I have been through the birth of my son, the ICU for my son (2x), my father's hospitalization and death, friends deaths, football games, baseball games, tailgates, drunken HS reunions, vacations, long drives, shitty weather, sleep deprivation, bowling, yardwork, and pretty much everything else. I have been black out drunk and stone sober. Occasionally a craving hits, and sometimes they linger like a fart in the shower, but ultimately my word means something to me.

No, dont even give the semblance of a alcohol being an even close to acceptable reason for caving. Its a bullshit excuse for those with weak resolve and shows a lack of testicular fortitude. Either quit or don't, life will keep on throwing the good and bad at you. Make the decisions you need to make to defend your quit, have a plan, and give your word as a bond.

Alcohol cannot make you cave. And I dont really give a shit if you were drunk when you did cave. Its irrelevant.
J2B I agree. Alcohol isn't a reason, justification or excuse to cave. For the quit, drinking is not relevant to their quit. You haven't caved, I haven't caved and plenty of people drunk or sober will not cave.

I only have a theory that a planned cave (in most instances) involves alcohol to numb and justify an impulse to chew. Cavers can answer what impact alcohol had in their choice to cave.

A quitters alcohol consumption is not relevant but if there is a pattern with 90% of cavers, I suggest it is relevant to the fallen. The site recommends to not drink for the first 50 days. I am thinking that if a caver post day 1, they should consider following the plan but making the 50 days sober a requirement in their quit and not just a recommendation.

Wearing a seatbelt is a good recommendation. It doesn't really prevent accidents but it assists in saving lives. Maybe alcohol doesn't cause or excuse a cave but sobriety for the first 50 days + might assist in saving a person's quit?

All my opinion and theory.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Menace on December 04, 2013, 08:27:00 PM
GOW is now 4 days without posting roll on his latest attempt anyway.......not looking good......
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: RollinOverTheCan on January 23, 2016, 03:23:00 PM
Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just sitting here thinking "Who are you?" I have to stop soon or I will lose everything I care about especially my wife  family. That is all for now!
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: wastepanel on January 23, 2016, 03:53:00 PM
bump
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Wt57 on January 23, 2016, 04:24:00 PM
Quote from: RollinOverTheCan
Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years.
ATTENTION ADMINS!!!

Thanks wastepanel, you did it while I was posting.

Boy that's a understatement. Here's a day 2 in September 2011, another day 1 in November 2013 and now you come back and change your name! That's pure bullshit!!! You posted enough times to know the rules. No new accounts. Lat time you were asked to answer the questions and refused to do so. As for me I think that you tore up your return to the site card up. I've seen others banned for less! Let's get some administrative ruling on your case. At very least combine your accounts and answer the questions to the satisfaction of true quitters!
Quote
November Sky Divers
"The first step is a big one but that's when the fun begins"
Pre HOF November 2013

Today is: Thursday, November 14, 2013



NOVEMBER SKY DIVERS

GamerOnWheelz - Day 1

KICKASS SUPPORTERS
Quote
Wednesday, September 14, 2011

December 2011 Roll Call
===============================

I'm trying to unfuck this so that everyone who posted is here...and so we have a good roll to pull from...

Kick Ass December Quitters:


GamerOnWheelz - Day 2
Kick Ass December Support:

-
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: danojeno on January 23, 2016, 04:25:00 PM
Quote from: RollinOverTheCan
Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just sitting here thinking "Who are you?" I have to stop soon or I will lose everything I care about especially my wife  family. That is all for now!
So, you still aren't quit. Reading this update, I can tell you haven't learned very much in this painful journey of yours. You are still TRYING to quit for your wife and other people. You are TRYING to cut back. You are letting outside influences impact your tobacco usage. If you were truly done with this stuff you'd Quit Today. Don't quit forever or in two weeks. Just fucking quit today. That's how we do it here. You need to do some serious soul searching because right now, it doesn't sound like you have the stones for this.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: GamerOnWheelz on January 23, 2016, 06:12:00 PM
Quote from: danojeno
Quote from: RollinOverTheCan
Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just s ed very much in this painful journey of yours. You are still TRYING to quit for your wife and other people. You are TRYING to cut back. You are letting outside influences impact your tobacco usage. If you were truly done with this stuff you'd Quit Today. Don't quit forever or in two weeks. Just fucking quit today. That's how we do it here. You need to do some serious soul searching because right now, it doesn't sound like you have the stones for this.
Your right I'm not quit because I'm still feeding the nicotine monster by using alternatives w/ nicotine. All I was doing was admitting my wrongs to everyone in hopes that it will help me quit sooner. I was wrong I shouldn't have posted since I'm still using. The next time I post after this I will be sure to be quit  not using nicotine in any form at all. I made another account for the sake of symbolism. If I was trying to hide who I was, why would include my original account name in the post? Like I said the next time I post I will make sure I'm nicotine free first.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: AppleJack on January 23, 2016, 06:34:00 PM
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz
Quote from: danojeno
Quote from: RollinOverTheCan
Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just s ed very much in this painful journey of yours. You are still TRYING to quit for your wife and other people. You are TRYING to cut back. You are letting outside influences impact your tobacco usage. If you were truly done with this stuff you'd Quit Today. Don't quit forever or in two weeks. Just fucking quit today. That's how we do it here. You need to do some serious soul searching because right now, it doesn't sound like you have the stones for this.
Your right I'm not quit because I'm still feeding the nicotine monster by using alternatives w/ nicotine. All I was doing was admitting my wrongs to everyone in hopes that it will help me quit sooner. I was wrong I shouldn't have posted since I'm still using. The next time I post after this I will be sure to be quit  not using nicotine in any form at all. I made another account for the sake of symbolism. If I was trying to hide who I was, why would include my original account name in the post? Like I said the next time I post I will make sure I'm nicotine free first.
Oh, dude... you soooo don't get it. You've had ample time here to absorb protocol but... you haven't.

This is not the place for you.
Your track record has too many "tries" and your blatant use of a different name, despite a specific ban on that action, is enough reason for me to say... Adios. Buh-bye. GTFO.

Admins? I think a legit ban is in order here...
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: worktowin on January 23, 2016, 08:48:00 PM
Quote from: AppleJack
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz
Quote from: danojeno
Quote from: RollinOverTheCan
Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just s ed very much in this painful journey of yours. You are still TRYING to quit for your wife and other people. You are TRYING to cut back. You are letting outside influences impact your tobacco usage. If you were truly done with this stuff you'd Quit Today. Don't quit forever or in two weeks. Just fucking quit today. That's how we do it here. You need to do some serious soul searching because right now, it doesn't sound like you have the stones for this.
Your right I'm not quit because I'm still feeding the nicotine monster by using alternatives w/ nicotine. All I was doing was admitting my wrongs to everyone in hopes that it will help me quit sooner. I was wrong I shouldn't have posted since I'm still using. The next time I post after this I will be sure to be quit  not using nicotine in any form at all. I made another account for the sake of symbolism. If I was trying to hide who I was, why would include my original account name in the post? Like I said the next time I post I will make sure I'm nicotine free first.
Oh, dude... you soooo don't get it. You've had ample time here to absorb protocol but... you haven't.

This is not the place for you.
Your track record has too many "tries" and your blatant use of a different name, despite a specific ban on that action, is enough reason for me to say... Adios. Buh-bye. GTFO.

Admins? I think a legit ban is in order here...
I am so confused.

Erussell, who today hits day 1,000, joined this site with a patch on. After a quick schooling, like the bad ass he is, he ripped that patch off and drank the kook aid. A cocaine addict would never switch to heroin to quit, anslcoholuc wouldn't switch from vodka to gin to quit...

I've been here 1,126 days and I just don't get it. Can someone explain to me how this logic of getting out a measuring stick and saying... Ok today I'm gonna cut my 10mg of neurotoxin down to 7.5mg... Accomplishes one goddamn thing other than keeping an addict addicted? Please someone teach me how this works! Inquiring minds want to know!!
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Cope30 on January 23, 2016, 09:10:00 PM
Welcome to the brotherhood! It is going to be a long crazy ride but all of us in the BROTHERHOOD are behind you 100%.
Make that promise to not pick that can up ever again, you will want to, but don't give in to the Nic Bitch. She will whisper sweet nothings in your ear to get you to re-commit to her, I now she is sexy to look, she is a 10 right now, but like the saying goes, I went to bed at 2 with a 10 and woke up at 10 with a 2. That's what she will look like after some time a 2, then she will just disgust you to look at her. Hang in there we are all here for you! 'bang head'
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Wt57 on January 25, 2016, 03:03:00 PM
Quote from: GamerOnWheelz
Quote from: danojeno
Quote from: RollinOverTheCan
Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just s ed very much in this painful journey of yours. You are still TRYING to quit for your wife and other people. You are TRYING to cut back. You are letting outside influences impact your tobacco usage. If you were truly done with this stuff you'd Quit Today. Don't quit forever or in two weeks. Just fucking quit today. That's how we do it here. You need to do some serious soul searching because right now, it doesn't sound like you have the stones for this.
Your right I'm not quit because I'm still feeding the nicotine monster by using alternatives w/ nicotine. All I was doing was admitting my wrongs to everyone in hopes that it will help me quit sooner. I was wrong I shouldn't have posted since I'm still using. The next time I post after this I will be sure to be quit  not using nicotine in any form at all. I made another account for the sake of symbolism. If I was trying to hide who I was, why would include my original account name in the post? Like I said the next time I post I will make sure I'm nicotine free first.
Damn it, I see that you're still lurking out there. If your serious you'll rip the bandaid off. I don't have a good feeling about this.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: AppleJack on January 25, 2016, 03:30:00 PM
I'll repeat myself...

Ban

You taint what this place is all about. It's not a "try, and, try again" method. One and done. Own it.
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: Thumblewort on January 28, 2016, 02:15:00 PM
Quote from: RollinOverTheCan
Hello,

This isn't my first time I haved visited or posted in the forum. I have made new account but I was aka. GamerOnWheelz  I had quit in 2011 I was doing well with it post my days with my assigned Quit Group for a little over 2 years. During that time I continued to use snuff alternatives big mistake on my part but then in October of 2013 I lost my Dad due to suicide. I used his death to justify going back to the can which was another major mistake  I wish I wouldn't listened to the nic bitch she always can hit you when your at your weakest. Also when I quit in 2011 the only reason I quit was only to buy a damn computer which was big another big mistake, I should of done it for myself not for a PC. I wasn't thinking of my wife or my family I just made it about me. Now its January 2016 I keep telling my wife I was going to quit not long after my Dad's death but the weeks  months turned into years. I've put her through hell because of resorting back to the can. Just recently I started cutting back on the snuff but I keep telling my wife  others close to me it was my last can x5 or x6. I had bought some pouches from Triumph Chew a few months back to step down off the nicotine. I will be stepping down from full to half strength in a day or so. What finally made me start using the product was just recently my dentist found a spot on my gums he said I had 2 options either change sides in my mouth which he wasn't crazy about or his recommended option Quit. So I'm working toward my quit which will be very soon I will cut off the nicotine completely forever  this time I will utilize the KTC support system  posting roll which I took for granted last time. My addiction has made me selfish, deceptive, a betrayer, liar  a poor excuse for man. I know I'm better than that I'm just sitting here thinking "Who are you?" I have to stop soon or I will lose everything I care about especially my wife  family. That is all for now!
You only get one account my man, time to face the music.

My wife was diagnosed with breast cancer in November, guess what I didn't turn to. I am truly sorry for your loss, but it isn't an excuse. You have to own your quit each and every day.

I read all 3 pages of your intro, you had a "whos who" bunch of quitter helping you, yet you shied away from them. What will be different this time?
Title: Re: Hello My Name Is Brandon Aka. GamerOnwheelz
Post by: GamerOnWheelz on January 31, 2016, 03:17:00 PM
I will be posting Day 1 today  it hasn't been that bad but I know I'm only getting started. Most you are wanting a better explanation as to why I caved. So, here it is my Dad died in 2013 I had quit 2 years prior to this close to 1,000 days but from 2011 to 2013 I was still using Oregon Mint Pouches. So, I used it every day through the entire quit  never stopped. I feel that was part of the reason that caved so easily  using the flimsy excuse of my Dad dying, man what selfish asshole I was for doing that. Honestly I started using again because I was thinking about my pain  not considering others around me quite frankly I starting using again because I wanted to. My father committed suicide so I decided to do that also just a little slower by returning to the can. What kind of idiot uses that kind of logic? So I used for a while  thought I was slick by posting Day 1 in another quit group but I got caught. Everyone wanted an explanation as to why I fell off the wagon  I was like screw them I'm adult I'll do what I want. Yet again my addiction took over because of bad decision making  not considering my my wife, family  especially my KTC brothers  sisters. I see now why I should of stayed quit in the first place so today I want to apologize to everyone here at KTC for my actions. I know some of you would like to see me banned from KTC but I would like to ask that you reconsider because I've made mistakes  I know we all have on this site. Next time something major happens in my life I'm going to have to cope with things a lot differently in a more healthy way  that doesn't include smokeless tobacco but I will include my support system such as my wife, family  KTC family. That's all for now.