KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: brettlees on October 28, 2013, 04:50:00 PM
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I took my last dip Oct 1, but did plenty of nico-gum until my spouse confronted me and led me to cut back on gum- Oct. 20. The next few days, I came across this and other sites, which convinced me to jump in and just quit. 6 mg nic from gum until Oct 23, when i left the nic-bit** behind for good this time. Now, I want to get the help i'll need to make this one stick. For life.
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Great choice, Bretless!!! You're nic free, right? Just want to make sure. If you are, then go to the Welcome Center link above and learn how/why we post roll.
Then, all you need to do it post your name up there and start living free!!!
It is the hardest simple thing to do in the world. But your life depends on it. And we're here to help you fight!
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are you free of nicotine in any form?
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Quitting is really simple.
Read everything on here, post roll call each morning and don't dip. Wow....that sounds so easy, doesn't it?
If you read through the other intro's you may see some of my same words on them but they always hold true so I will just repeat them...
You are in for one nasty fight but you have the tools here to make it.
Go load yourself up with gum, mints, fake chew, seeds and beef jerky. Also get some member phone numbers right now, they will help you through the rough parts.
Next, exercise to exhaustion every single day and drink so much water that you feel like you may bust. Both of these will help.
Make sure your wife reads about what you are going through. 99% chance that you are going to be a short fussed dick for the next 3-4 weeks. Try not to take it out on her and the kids. Get on here and take it out on us, we will be fine.
I quit with you.
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Thanks for responding/supporting - I"m good at being "invisible" so I need to not be that way to make this work for good. Being invisible/sneaky was a way I kept up my affair with nic-bitch for so long. Wow, i started at 15, "stopped" some times over the years, sometimes up to a year it seems. But it found its way back- "just once" over an over again!
Yes, I"m 100% nic-free since Oct 23. I think I posted role but that was a little weird. I have time to figure it out, I suppose-- I really want this to be the true "Quit". The withdrawals have sucked but Im embracing them as progress. Kind of makes them fun in a weird way.
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I want to add a little here as I go, as a record and to keep building my accountability network. What makes sense to me right now is to talk about symptoms because they are pretty big for me. I"m in day 8. I'm really in a fog a lot of the time. Feels light headed, almost dizzy, poor concentration. I'm good with it because I know I'll come out. My work suffers but so far that's ok.
A couple days ago i had a sore lymph node on one side. Of course i feared cancer. It's gone now, after only about a day. THen yesterday my mouth began noticably healing. Layers seem to be peeling off inside. Some minor sores. I've been here when I stopped before, And, the other side's lymph node is irritated. As long as nothing stays too long, i'm ok with all of these.
Gas keeps coming on too- especially at night. That's been a real factor in "stops" before sometimes- but this time it's tolerable. I just wish it would quit eventually.
I feel like I could stay on this site all day, make supportive friends, etc. That must be where my needs lie. But I have to work- been cruising around here long already. I"m very thankful for it though. Will go take a walk, see if I can blast some of this fog out for a bit and get to some work.
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My "suck scale" looked something like this:
Day 1-3: bad fog, my brain didn't work at all. Very little sleep and couldn't take a dump to save my life. I wanted a dip every second of each day.
Day 4-10: Pretty much out of the fog but bad, bad cravings and headache every second of the day
Day 11-14: My cruise control days, I didn't think about dipping much and craves were few and far between. Sleeping good but too much.
Day 15-21 Starting to get my energy level back up. Craves about 2-4 per day and short. The first thing every morning, I started to get an empty and sick feeling in my stomach when I thought about not being able to dip. Started losing my temper easily.
Day 22-25 No real changes, cruising along but feeling a little depressed. I started learning how to hate my addiction and was really mad about it.
Day 26- 30: Wow, I was starting to gain a lot of weight. Weird how I replaced Cope with Ice Cream and cake. I don't even eat sweets but here I am 10 lbs heavier. I don't care, I'm not dipping and the craves are mild.
Day 31-38: Freaking fog was back, some nasty craves and my temper way out of control. WTF!
Day 39-60: The roller coaster days. Mod craves followed by no craves, bad temper and mild depression. A difficult time but I was not giving up at this point.
Day 61-73: The best days by far. Seldom think about dip, temper is way better, sleeping like a normal person and just feeling pretty darn good. I am stacking up these good days to recharge my batteries and prepare for the next round of fights".
Day 74- 85: Really good days. Strong cravings when I have too many drinks so I have been careful with drinking. Normal days are now 0-1 crave. My temper has been completely under control for 2 weeks now.
Day 86-99: Zero craves, zero dip dreams and temper under control. The strong craves when I drink are also gone. I am disgusted when I see someone dip. Proudly watching my group hit HOF one at a time; which is just how we quit, one day at a time. My guard is still held high as I know the fight is far from over.
Day 100-101: I am on a high as I have reached my first goal. My guard is held the highest it has ever been in because I will not disappoint all those who have helped me.
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This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
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This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Hey brother, same feelings as you almost to a T as well as the "fuck its". Irritated constantly and have had a crave that was a like tital wave after work last night. Most likely a panic attack which I suffer from but I gathered myself, went home, worked out and didn't cave.
We are going through this shit together, I can't go back, let's use each other. Stay strong.
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Another gripe session i gotta get out.... so today, the fog is there still but not my main influence. Instead, today, the nic-bitch is reminding me that i no longer have my little "friend", who has kept me company through everything for the past decades. I can tap into that "missing" and feel really sad. But then anger is readily available to me too- it really pisses me off to realize that that "little friend" trick has worked really well for the addiction over the years-- i've caved to it every time before now.
Nic-bitch is working me hard with these mindgames today. I"m pissed about it and I'm GLAD i'm pissed. I"m fighting back today- strong. Thanks for the support now, and for all the work done by everyone who has made this site, becuase it helps me to find the right focus, and for today to tap into my anger about the situation instead of taking some other path, and to fight back. Bring it on nic-bitch, you are not gonna get me today!!! I might just have caved on a day like today if i hadn't found my way here, but i guarantee that instead, today i'm going head to head with that bitch and not backing down an inch.
Any of you need a hand in the fight? i"m right there with you in spirit--- I'll slug that bitch out of the park today anywhere she shows up that I can find a way to have an influence-- including with any of you! Maybe another day will be different, but i'm pushing back hard for this day and it feels good. THe deeper the fog today, the harder im' gonna push back!
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Nic was never your "friend". It was a posion that hooked you. It systematically rewired your brain to think it gave you things that it could not possibly deliver. Oh yeah, it was also draining your wallet and trying to kill you. Some "friend".
I used to think dipping relieved stress, but when I think back the only stress I was relieving was the withdrawl pang from my previous dip.
To analogize, It was almost like I had acne and I thought dip was like the pimple cream that made my skin clear. My face would fucking itch, become irritated, and burn like hell until I reached for my dip. Then, ahhhhhhh the sweet relief. This continued for 15 years, my face constany ablaze looking for the soothing relief from my magic zit cream. It was a never ending cycle that required more and more cream, to a point where no amount of cream was enough, I always needed more. Eventually it dawned on me that the zit cream was not clearing up my face, it was CAUSING it ro become zitty, red, and irritated. Took some time for me to comes to terms with this, after I swore off the zit cream, but after 516 days without the cream, I can tell you with 100% certainty that it was indeed the cream that was the CAUSE and not the RELIEF. I did not accept this fact immediately as I missed my cream, but once my brain rewired it became as clear as my now baby ass soft face.
I also used to think chewing cured boredome. Now I cannot think of a more boring task than sucking on a wad of tobacco and spitting it into an empty bottle. Real exciting. I'd rather stuff my ass full of fireworks and squat over a flaming hibatchi than do that again.
Concentration...used to think dip gave me that as well. The first day I quit, the phone rang at work and I looked at it like it was a fucking grenade with pin pulled. I was scared shitless to answer it. Again, over some time I came to the realization that dip dif not make me awesome at my job. I did. If anything it was holding me back as all I used to think about was when I could sneak out and get a dip in. One of the greatest benefits for me , since I quit has been the return of my confidence. I'm ashamed now to think that I used to give posion leaves in a can credit for my successes. Even worse I would NEVER think to blame it on any of my failures.
Another falsity was that dip was a "fun enhancer". Like bowling, golfing, or playing softball, etc...was more "fun" if I had a dip in. What kind of fucked up shit is that? Another total lie built on the shoulders of ADDICTION. I wasn't chewing while doing those things because it made them more "fun", I was doing it because I was an addict. In fact one thing I realized after I quit is that I really didn't even like bowling. I was mainly in the league just so I could dip. Hell, I'm not even in a bowling league anymore, and I can go out and play some golf or softball and enjoy it just as much if not more than when I used to do it with a turd in my lip. I didn't need that crap and never did.
These realities took a while for me to realize, so don't feel bad if you can't see the forest through the trees yet. Just take this shit one day at a time and with each +1 you post without the nic bitch things will get clearer.
Not to toot my own horn (toot toot), but go to words of wisdom and read my "tend your garden" post. It kind of chronicles the journey from ugly to beautiful. Check it out if you get a chance.
Hang in there bro. Better days are ahead. I promise.
Quit on...
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Nic was never your "friend". It was a posion that hooked you. It systematically rewired your brain to think it gave you things that it could not possibly deliver. Oh yeah, it was also draining your wallet and trying to kill you. Some "friend".
I used to think dipping relieved stress, but when I think back the only stress I was relieving was the withdrawl pang from my previous dip.
To analogize, It was almost like I had acne and I thought dip was like the pimple cream that made my skin clear. My face would fucking itch, become irritated, and burn like hell until I reached for my dip. Then, ahhhhhhh the sweet relief. This continued for 15 years, my face constany ablaze looking for the soothing relief from my magic zit cream. It was a never ending cycle that required more and more cream, to a point where no amount of cream was enough, I always needed more. Eventually it dawned on me that the zit cream was not clearing up my face, it was CAUSING it ro become zitty, red, and irritated. Took some time for me to comes to terms with this, after I swore off the zit cream, but after 516 days without the cream, I can tell you with 100% certainty that it was indeed the cream that was the CAUSE and not the RELIEF. I did not accept this fact immediately as I missed my cream, but once my brain rewired it became as clear as my now baby ass soft face.
I also used to think chewing cured boredome. Now I cannot think of a more boring task than sucking on a wad of tobacco and spitting it into an empty bottle. Real exciting. I'd rather stuff my ass full of fireworks and squat over a flaming hibatchi than do that again.
Concentration...used to think dip gave me that as well. The first day I quit, the phone rang at work and I looked at it like it was a fucking grenade with pin pulled. I was scared shitless to answer it. Again, over some time I came to the realization that dip dif not make me awesome at my job. I did. If anything it was holding me back as all I used to think about was when I could sneak out and get a dip in. One of the greatest benefits for me , since I quit has been the return of my confidence. I'm ashamed now to think that I used to give posion leaves in a can credit for my successes. Even worse I would NEVER think to blame it on any of my failures.
Another falsity was that dip was a "fun enhancer". Like bowling, golfing, or playing softball, etc...was more "fun" if I had a dip in. What kind of fucked up shit is that? Another total lie built on the shoulders of ADDICTION. I wasn't chewing while doing those things because it made them more "fun", I was doing it because I was an addict. In fact one thing I realized after I quit is that I really didn't even like bowling. I was mainly in the league just so I could dip. Hell, I'm not even in a bowling league anymore, and I can go out and play some golf or softball and enjoy it just as much if not more than when I used to do it with a turd in my lip. I didn't need that crap and never did.
These realities took a while for me to realize, so don't feel bad if you can't see the forest through the trees yet. Just take this shit one day at a time and with each +1 you post without the nic bitch things will get clearer.
Not to toot my own horn (toot toot), but go to words of wisdom and read my "tend your garden" post. It kind of chronicles the journey from ugly to beautiful. Check it out if you get a chance.
Hang in there bro. Better days are ahead. I promise.
Quit on...
Thanks d this all really helps. I was strong yesterday, pitiful last night, and lost today. This is crazy! Nic bitch is evil! Your words of wisdom and nics top tricks were very helpful today. I will stay quit today.
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Day 13- got some light through the fog today, and is it ever nice! This is crazy fog overall. Read a post by Jayhawk on Big Russ's thread that said he was in in for 45 days. If that's what it takes, I'm in. But still really glad for a day like today where it's only at 50% instead of how its been lately. Jayhawk's experience sounds a lot like mine-- i kind of have to keep on top of things for my job but that's not how i'm wired right now. I too can stare at an eamil for an hour and nothing happens! Ha, I'm lucky i can get away with that for now. I'll be better in the end, especially since i won't have to slink away every hour our so to sooth my bitch cravings, or find a place to stach the discarded stuff, or spit!
Big thanks to everyone who's expressed support and helped lately. Thanks to Evil_won for text on the weekend and for posting for me.
Been reading from the new quitters and i'm right there with you all. I've been so many of those same places, so many times! You can do it- this works better for me so far wiht KTC. Would have been seduced by the tricks of the nic bitch so many times by now, i'm sure, from how the familiar feelings come up but now i'm armed with support and more accountabiliy-- hell, even a term for the "ninja dipper" style i perfected over the years. It's good to know so many people could call bullshit on the tricks i used, including on myself.
Glad to Quit with you all today.
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It's going to really be a battle. Doing great but you must stay quit today. No worry or concern for tomorrow. Just today.
If you are here tomorrow, great, just repeat. You will have some real battles and then others will be a comedy. Just stay on course and quit when its today.
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Day 13- got some light through the fog today, and is it ever nice! This is crazy fog overall. Read a post by Jayhawk on Big Russ's thread that said he was in in for 45 days. If that's what it takes, I'm in. But still really glad for a day like today where it's only at 50% instead of how its been lately. Jayhawk's experience sounds a lot like mine-- i kind of have to keep on top of things for my job but that's not how i'm wired right now. I too can stare at an eamil for an hour and nothing happens! Ha, I'm lucky i can get away with that for now. I'll be better in the end, especially since i won't have to slink away every hour our so to sooth my bitch cravings, or find a place to stach the discarded stuff, or spit!
Big thanks to everyone who's expressed support and helped lately. Thanks to Evil_won for text on the weekend and for posting for me.
Been reading from the new quitters and i'm right there with you all. I've been so many of those same places, so many times! You can do it- this works better for me so far wiht KTC. Would have been seduced by the tricks of the nic bitch so many times by now, i'm sure, from how the familiar feelings come up but now i'm armed with support and more accountabiliy-- hell, even a term for the "ninja dipper" style i perfected over the years. It's good to know so many people could call bullshit on the tricks i used, including on myself.
Glad to Quit with you all today.
That fog is something else. Mine also lasted about 45 days. Jayhawk and I had a similar, albeit it rather extreme, experience. And I am so thankful for the fog... Because when I think back to those crazy dark days I get furious. Furious at nicotine. Furious at tobacco. But mostly furious with myself for feeding my addiction and inviting the fog into my life!
I faked my way through work for a good month. Nobody noticed a thing except me. And I ended up with a promotion.... Quitting can bring all sorts of positives into your life. Long story short... Enjoy the fog. Let it fuel some rage. And keep in touch with jayhawk. The guy knows how to quit.
If I can ever help let me know. I'll shoot you my contact info. Not a jayhawk here, but do live in kc. Go chiefs!
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Hello Brettlees!
Glad to have you on board. However, I hate to be the bearer of this news - the fog can sometimes take a while.
But, trust me and Worktowin. It will eventually pass. I also agree with W2W - you don't want to forget this. Let it be a reminder to you as you progress just how much effort it takes to quit. Yes, it sucks, but hey - nothing worth doing is easy.
Your physical body is getting rid of years and years of nicotine and habit and feelings of security. Just take the advice and try out what works for you.
The following information below was provided to me when I first joined KTC from CBird. During the fog, I went through this e-mail hundreds of times. It helped me each and every time in a different way. I am posting it here - thanks to CBird for you to use. Use it. It helps.
This site can help you kick your nicotine habit to the curb. We don't use words like try or hope as they are just another excuse for our addictive brains to tell us another lie. There are no short cuts, but here are some links that will help you navigate this site.
This a NO NICOTINE site. End of discussion. Why this Site Works
Biggest thing to do is get acquainted with this site.
Highly recommend you go here: WELCOME CENTER, Getting acclimated and What to Expect
Your quit decision MUST be 100% your decision. Anything short of that sets you up for failure by allowing your addict brain to blame a given situation as reason for you to go back to the can
You want another layer of accountability? Come post in my room every morning after you post roll in yours April 2012
If applicable Spousal or Significant Other Support
Here are some things that got me through the initial "suck period":
Find an alternative herbal dip. I dipped Copenhagen for 35 years and used the fake herbal dip to help with the oral fixation. Here is a list of Smokeless non-tobacco alternative Don't want to use a 'fake dip' then nuts, candy or gum might help
Start drinking a lot of water and do it every day
Find an exercise program - walking - jogging- weights- basketball- anything that will wear you out
Be prepared for restless sleep - try Melatonin (all natural) or get some Tylenol PM (careful those can be habit forming)
Any time you feel a "crave" try to determine what is triggering it -write it down so you'll remember next time or so you can reflect later in your quit- never forget the "hell you are going through right now" get up and move -
Get on the site and read - Need to CHAT
Like any other open forum - everyone has an opinion - when they are sharing (whether is asked for or not) - take what you need and leave the rest - it's not personal its only about the quit -
Feeling weak- like you can't quit? Print this out contract to cave and tell everyone you love the can means more to you than they do
Most important Post roll every damn day - like your life depends on it-
keep your word - you posted today - do it daily, keep that promise and then repeat
Need some motivation for your quit The meaning of QLF Get an attitude about it and quit that shit and do it every damned day (EDD)
Reach out to other quitters. Get their phone numbers and talk with them. It might be awkward at first but these are the guys you are going to lean on for support or help out when they are in need.
Try to find some: Local KTC Quitters Never underestimate the value of a face to face meet with another KTC Quitter.
Once you've digested all of this stuff try this :In the upper right corner of your screen, click on "My Controls". Then, on the left of the page click "Board Settings". Set your posts and topics viewed per page to 90." I will make reading the 'older posts easier.
Turn your introduction page into a journal by adding updates on your quit there * no need to open a 2nd intro page. If you didn't do an Intro- start one now! This is a great way to reflect on your quit success but also provides a trail to a new quitter.
PM if I can help
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Journal entry, day 15-- last two days, the dizziness of the fog is a lot less, but the stupidness/can't focus for sh** is still there. Also, these two days, when a craving hits i feel it deep in my body, pretty strong like in the first three days. That's a surprise. I am finding that I am confident that I can beat them too.
I have read a few things that really hit home for me. One guy caved over the weekend, and is getting beat up on the board. I hope he makes it back in line. I have caved every time in the past so i can't be too arrogant about it. And, another guy got called out by his wife for being an ass. I"ve been lucky in that regard- yes, i've been an ass too though. His experience reminds me to be aware of my temper, etc. I do almost blow up at about anything lately--- feels sort of fun to indulge it a little, and also to be aware of the extent of the rage- i feel like I could really kick the **** out of any petty "offender"-- and that shows me how out of proportion it is and helps me keep calm, strangely. Finally, several guys are in the fog as much and as long as me. At least I"m not alone. And several with longer quits are saying that's pretty normal, and that helps too.
I"m out. Dizziness of the fog's coming on, going to try and move around and shake that because i have to get some work done!
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Like trying to think with a fuzzy wet blanket on your brain isn't it.
While the nicotine is out of your system there are another dozen chemicals that are still being purged from your body. In another few days you should start feeling much better.
Exercise will absolutely help combat the fog. Even a walk.
Watch your caffeine intake and keep your blood sugar steady
You got this. If I could do it so can you.
sM
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Like trying to think with a fuzzy wet blanket on your brain isn't it.
While the nicotine is out of your system there are another dozen chemicals that are still being purged from your body. In another few days you should start feeling much better.
Exercise will absolutely help combat the fog. Even a walk.
Watch your caffeine intake and keep your blood sugar steady
You got this. If I could do it so can you.
sM
Listen to this dude and keep on quitting. I know EXACTLY how you are feeling. Trust me - this will break up and get better. Just keep kicking that cans ass each and every minute today.
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Like trying to think with a fuzzy wet blanket on your brain isn't it.
While the nicotine is out of your system there are another dozen chemicals that are still being purged from your body. In another few days you should start feeling much better.
Exercise will absolutely help combat the fog. Even a walk.
Watch your caffeine intake and keep your blood sugar steady
You got this. If I could do it so can you.
sM
Listen to this dude and keep on quitting. I know EXACTLY how you are feeling. Trust me - this will break up and get better. Just keep kicking that cans ass each and every minute today.
Dont stress over mental lacking now. Relish the days of freedom you've earned. Keep quitting.
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Brettlees, your posts have shown true fight and dedication. I loved it when you got mad at Nic. You are a champion. Keep it up, I'm only in day 6 and the fog is tough. I may need your help but enjoy reading what you are posting.
mogul
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Thanks for the support and comments, Mogul, Jayhawk, Grizfall, Skoal Monster, worktowin, MThomas-- each of you have really helped me in the last week with your words.
Logging in the suck lately- day 17:
Big issues since the past post are sharp, mean, fast craves. I"m meaner though. They piss me off because they are arrogant and strong- nic bitch is showing the real bitch side with them. Note to self: remember these when you are about to get complacent, because they seem to be sneaky and dangerous. I'm going to slap the damn things down as well as I can right now though, so that bitch doesn't think they might work sometime.
Another issue is my mouth feeling like i'm shedding a layer- feels swollen in gums and lips, and teeth hurt some. ALso feels numbish or tingly a lot, in toungue, lips, gums somewhat. Sort of I swished a little novacaine or something. It must be healing, and it'll pass.
Fuzzy-brain fog comes and goes in waves, and i've resigned to ride out the "brain don't work right" for another month before I worry about it. It does get me weary though, becuase i'm used to having what I thought was a sharp brain for the most part. At least I probably will have a living brain longer because of this quit. Gas still an issue at nights usually, but it doesn't hurt so im not complaining, just logging it.
I"m feeling pretty bummed/scared/pissed because of a couple of guys dealing with health issues despite their quits. Just read dunlapsig's account of a problem in his mouth. Pisses me off, mostly. So does caving- not the person caving- i've caved every time I've stopped before in the past so i'm no better, but rather I hate the fact that this shit is engineered to make us have to be warriors to not cave, and by byproducts of that is the cancer. F-ing mean and heartless. F* this shit. F* the people who make it and live in big houses in in the Southeast and whereever else because they made it this way and made a financial sucess. F the people who have had chances to protect peopl from it and voted against it because of money. F the people living in estates built on family money gained from dealing in this government-sanctioned highly addictive and deadly poison drug trade.
My heart is with everyone fighting this shit today, because the cards were stacked against you but you fight, and you win, day by day, person by person. Thanks for this site and the people to give to it to help it work. And thanks for giving me the strength to get this far this time. I know we preach the day to day, but I"m quitting today AND all weekend RIGHT NOW. Sure, I"ll post role or ask someone to help me if i cant get to a computer, but go ahead and consider me quit today, tomorrow and the next, and damned proud to be quit with each one of you who might read ths.
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Thanks for the support and comments, Mogul, Jayhawk, Grizfall, Skoal Monster, worktowin, MThomas-- each of you have really helped me in the last week with your words.
Logging in the suck lately- day 17:
Big issues since the past post are sharp, mean, fast craves. I"m meaner though. They piss me off because they are arrogant and strong- nic bitch is showing the real bitch side with them. Note to self: remember these when you are about to get complacent, because they seem to be sneaky and dangerous. I'm going to slap the damn things down as well as I can right now though, so that bitch doesn't think they might work sometime.
Another issue is my mouth feeling like i'm shedding a layer- feels swollen in gums and lips, and teeth hurt some. ALso feels numbish or tingly a lot, in toungue, lips, gums somewhat. Sort of I swished a little novacaine or something. It must be healing, and it'll pass.
Fuzzy-brain fog comes and goes in waves, and i've resigned to ride out the "brain don't work right" for another month before I worry about it. It does get me weary though, becuase i'm used to having what I thought was a sharp brain for the most part. At least I probably will have a living brain longer because of this quit. Gas still an issue at nights usually, but it doesn't hurt so im not complaining, just logging it.
I"m feeling pretty bummed/scared/pissed because of a couple of guys dealing with health issues despite their quits. Just read dunlapsig's account of a problem in his mouth. Pisses me off, mostly. So does caving- not the person caving- i've caved every time I've stopped before in the past so i'm no better, but rather I hate the fact that this shit is engineered to make us have to be warriors to not cave, and by byproducts of that is the cancer. F-ing mean and heartless. F* this shit. F* the people who make it and live in big houses in in the Southeast and whereever else because they made it this way and made a financial sucess. F the people who have had chances to protect peopl from it and voted against it because of money. F the people living in estates built on family money gained from dealing in this government-sanctioned highly addictive and deadly poison drug trade.
My heart is with everyone fighting this shit today, because the cards were stacked against you but you fight, and you win, day by day, person by person. Thanks for this site and the people to give to it to help it work. And thanks for giving me the strength to get this far this time. I know we preach the day to day, but I"m quitting today AND all weekend RIGHT NOW. Sure, I"ll post role or ask someone to help me if i cant get to a computer, but go ahead and consider me quit today, tomorrow and the next, and damned proud to be quit with each one of you who might read ths.
I'm right with you man, my mouth is shedding also, painful some days and other days it's fine. You and I have emailed back and forth and I appreciate your support and I hope I can be a sounding board for you as well.
I think we're in a spot right now where it's hard to see the forest through the trees. The fog, anxiety, mood swings, intense craves and irritability are necessary so we don't go back to killing ourselves.....which will happen if we go back to the can. Change is hard but it's got to be worth it.
Get busy livin or get busy dyin. Damn right.
Keep Grindin.
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Thanks for the support and comments, Mogul, Jayhawk, Grizfall, Skoal Monster, worktowin, MThomas-- each of you have really helped me in the last week with your words.
Logging in the suck lately- day 17:
Big issues since the past post are sharp, mean, fast craves. I"m meaner though. They piss me off because they are arrogant and strong- nic bitch is showing the real bitch side with them. Note to self: remember these when you are about to get complacent, because they seem to be sneaky and dangerous. I'm going to slap the damn things down as well as I can right now though, so that bitch doesn't think they might work sometime.
Another issue is my mouth feeling like i'm shedding a layer- feels swollen in gums and lips, and teeth hurt some. ALso feels numbish or tingly a lot, in toungue, lips, gums somewhat. Sort of I swished a little novacaine or something. It must be healing, and it'll pass.
Fuzzy-brain fog comes and goes in waves, and i've resigned to ride out the "brain don't work right" for another month before I worry about it. It does get me weary though, becuase i'm used to having what I thought was a sharp brain for the most part. At least I probably will have a living brain longer because of this quit. Gas still an issue at nights usually, but it doesn't hurt so im not complaining, just logging it.
I"m feeling pretty bummed/scared/pissed because of a couple of guys dealing with health issues despite their quits. Just read dunlapsig's account of a problem in his mouth. Pisses me off, mostly. So does caving- not the person caving- i've caved every time I've stopped before in the past so i'm no better, but rather I hate the fact that this shit is engineered to make us have to be warriors to not cave, and by byproducts of that is the cancer. F-ing mean and heartless. F* this shit. F* the people who make it and live in big houses in in the Southeast and whereever else because they made it this way and made a financial sucess. F the people who have had chances to protect peopl from it and voted against it because of money. F the people living in estates built on family money gained from dealing in this government-sanctioned highly addictive and deadly poison drug trade.
My heart is with everyone fighting this shit today, because the cards were stacked against you but you fight, and you win, day by day, person by person. Thanks for this site and the people to give to it to help it work. And thanks for giving me the strength to get this far this time. I know we preach the day to day, but I"m quitting today AND all weekend RIGHT NOW. Sure, I"ll post role or ask someone to help me if i cant get to a computer, but go ahead and consider me quit today, tomorrow and the next, and damned proud to be quit with each one of you who might read ths.
I'm right with you man, my mouth is shedding also, painful some days and other days it's fine. You and I have emailed back and forth and I appreciate your support and I hope I can be a sounding board for you as well.
I think we're in a spot right now where it's hard to see the forest through the trees. The fog, anxiety, mood swings, intense craves and irritability are necessary so we don't go back to killing ourselves.....which will happen if we go back to the can. Change is hard but it's got to be worth it.
Get busy livin or get busy dyin. Damn right.
Keep Grindin.
Both of y'all are doing great. Stay in the moment. One minute, one second at a time. There is a door you both are heading for. This door is hard to get to and open. I can't tell you how long it will take you to get there, but i can tell you it's worth it. Keep pushing forward knowing that what's beyond this door is well worth the fight. Glad to be quit with you today.
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You are making great use of the tools. You have the right attitude and yeah it can be hard to see the path in the forest because of all the trees in the damned way. Just keep forging ahead, we have all been there and we understand that your days can either suck or suck worse in these stages.
I am at day 117 today and I can tell you that the days do all get better, there is still some sucky days and other days I would prefer just stay in bed with the covers over my head hiding from an addiction, but I choose daily to get up and kick addiction's ass every damned day.
I choose life today over anything else.
Pinched
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I'm right there with you man, especially with the fog and the shedding mouth. Keep plugging on, I quit with you today.
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keep on pushing forward brettlees and big russ. the mouth shedding is all part of it. believe it or not, reading updates from new guys like y'all help keep me energized and is one of the main reasons i keep coming to this site multiple times per day. pm me if you need an extra number. most importantly, stay strong this weekend! if you don't have numbers, get some, and if you have them, use them.
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'clap' 'clap'
Bravo! No reason not to trust what is being said. We are not making any money off you to keep you here. We have walked the trail you are on.
We are here because its worth it. It pissed me off too. I got so pissed I refused to let the nic bitch win. I couldn't have done it without calling for reinforcements but it gets easier. When the voice in your head tells you to make the call. Call a brother before giving in. There is something magical about that call. But call before you surrender to the seduction. Its a lie. If you can out last the crave, you will never regret it.
Right now when it is hurting the most...YOU ARE WINNING. YOU ARE A FIGHTER and its inspiring!
Keep your resolve, keep your word to us and Quit on.
Some will go back to can humping, but you have the edge. Stay with the plan. Post roll, keep your promise and don't think you are quit forever. Just every day you wake and its today...Post first thing.
Keep sharing too. We support you but your thoughts and your fight. I start pissing vinegar and want to beat down nicotine.
Don't be a can humper. Stay quit today.
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This weekend I went to a movie with the wife. This was the first movie I ever remember where i didn't have a crave, and i didn't have to slink off to the "restroom" to load up the lip. Ever! I do remember a couple of times of not having access to the stuff, adn the craves were so strong believe me the nic bitch made sure i remembered to pack some after that. I remember trying to come up with ways to hid the can for each movie, so I could stay a ninja dipper. I remember sometimes packing a dip or two's worth into some folded paper or a napkin prior to a movie, so i wouldn't risk discovery of the can and still would have some of "the precious" with me to pack into my lip during the show. If nothing else was available, i'd be sure to swallow a little cope to "help me make it" through the movie. Never again! and it was really nice not to be a slave/slut to copenhagen for just this one time!
The rest of the weekend was fine. My main withdrawal symptom seemed to be that I was sleepy sometimes, but luckily it was the weekend.
The nic bitch seems to have shifted a little from physical and fog, to a quieter, sneakier, and more mental game. And it feels familiar, like times I must have caved before. I can hear her whispering that "you've got this, you've proven you can quit, you've made it. Now how about a little one to celebrate? Just one." It feels so familiar that it must have worked a lot in the past. Now I see it as dangerous and sneaky shit of my addict mind. I can slap it down, and it helps to write about it so you all too- brings it into the light. I'm scared of this one, and so it's good to have a place where i can be accountable. I'll stay quit today with you all.
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This weekend I went to a movie with the wife. This was the first movie I ever remember where i didn't have a crave, and i didn't have to slink off to the "restroom" to load up the lip. Ever! I do remember a couple of times of not having access to the stuff, adn the craves were so strong believe me the nic bitch made sure i remembered to pack some after that. I remember trying to come up with ways to hid the can for each movie, so I could stay a ninja dipper. I remember sometimes packing a dip or two's worth into some folded paper or a napkin prior to a movie, so i wouldn't risk discovery of the can and still would have some of "the precious" with me to pack into my lip during the show. If nothing else was available, i'd be sure to swallow a little cope to "help me make it" through the movie. Never again! and it was really nice not to be a slave/slut to copenhagen for just this one time!
The rest of the weekend was fine. My main withdrawal symptom seemed to be that I was sleepy sometimes, but luckily it was the weekend.Â
The nic bitch seems to have shifted a little from physical and fog, to a quieter, sneakier, and more mental game. And it feels familiar, like times I must have caved before. I can hear her whispering that "you've got this, you've proven you can quit, you've made it. Now how about a little one to celebrate? Just one." It feels so familiar that it must have worked a lot in the past. Now I see it as dangerous and sneaky shit of my addict mind. I can slap it down, and it helps to write about it so you all too- brings it into the light. I'm scared of this one, and so it's good to have a place where i can be accountable. I'll stay quit today with you all.
I know that feeling all too well. Just find people on this site that did that and had to post a day 1 again. If you can learn from their personal surrender, you will dismiss that thought as a lie. A celebratory dip is a crock of shit! I never gave in but I have read too many posts of some that did. I know without experiencing myself that celebration or reward dips are bullshit!
Again, addiction is a liar. You quit that bitch and she is pissed. She is pulling out the stops. Celebrate by doing what you quit?
Think about that lie. I just need one and I deserve it, I've proven or have done great.
If nicotine is so bad, why would even one sound like a reward????
Because your addicted mind is messing with you. Is the buzz worth going back on your word. Is the buzz worth the regret you will feel for surrendering again...even if it was only once?
You are walking back to freedom. It's like a missing your jail cell. Sure there might be comfort because you are in the real world now learning how to be free. That hurts but its worth it.
Don't go back to jail to celebrate. Celebrate by taking in a long breath of freedom! It might hurt at first but it is soooo refreshing! 608, I never want to come near jail again that is why I personally quit alcohol and am on day 5. Freedom from vice. "I like pain. Whats your excuse?" (Joemellow's wrestlers say that to him) Stay undefeated by fighting today. No thoughts about tomorrow but today. Don't go back and reminisce about your cell. Fresh air of freedom can burn your lungs at first but it does more for your mind and soul than that piece of shit weed! Stay quit today brother in the gospel of quit!
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Brettlees, where are you posting roll, I can't find you.
Mogul
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Brettlees, where are you posting roll, I can't find you.
Mogul
Hey Mogul- i'm in the Jan 2014 Nic Killers
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sounds good Brettlees. I found ya.
For some reason I thought you were in FEB with us. Thanks
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This weekend I went to a movie with the wife. This was the first movie I ever remember where i didn't have a crave, and i didn't have to slink off to the "restroom" to load up the lip. Ever! I do remember a couple of times of not having access to the stuff, adn the craves were so strong believe me the nic bitch made sure i remembered to pack some after that. I remember trying to come up with ways to hid the can for each movie, so I could stay a ninja dipper. I remember sometimes packing a dip or two's worth into some folded paper or a napkin prior to a movie, so i wouldn't risk discovery of the can and still would have some of "the precious" with me to pack into my lip during the show. If nothing else was available, i'd be sure to swallow a little cope to "help me make it" through the movie. Never again! and it was really nice not to be a slave/slut to copenhagen for just this one time!
The rest of the weekend was fine. My main withdrawal symptom seemed to be that I was sleepy sometimes, but luckily it was the weekend.
The nic bitch seems to have shifted a little from physical and fog, to a quieter, sneakier, and more mental game. And it feels familiar, like times I must have caved before. I can hear her whispering that "you've got this, you've proven you can quit, you've made it. Now how about a little one to celebrate? Just one." It feels so familiar that it must have worked a lot in the past. Now I see it as dangerous and sneaky shit of my addict mind. I can slap it down, and it helps to write about it so you all too- brings it into the light. I'm scared of this one, and so it's good to have a place where i can be accountable. I'll stay quit today with you all.
That is good stuff there brettles. Knocking the bitch down, and recognizing her new tactics. I wrote about my first dip-free movie night too.
Glad to be quit with you.
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Day 21- the fog is a little better- fuzzy brain is only an infrequent visitor lately, and "brain not working" is getting better. and now, on to the major new twist-
So, I welcome each new craving in a way, because it's a chance to beat it down. And now, the latest trigger..... domestic problems- yes, issues with the spouse. What fun (joking, sarcastic). I haven't seen anyone post about this-- its embarassing and personal but it's also real so I'll do it.
Yeah, short of the death of a close family member, it's about the worst thing I could want. But it's happening, and its not bickering- rather, it's ran up credit card bills to the tune of thousands and thought I wouldn't notice, stole the bills from the mail for months to hide it from me, dropped my credit score into the tank. That's big. And the urges are strong, but I refuse to give in. This site and my accountabilty to others is now making ALL of the difference, because I would have definitely given in to the "fuck it all" of the situation and started chewing again in this situation if it weren't for the safety net i've built here with this site, and with you all. Thank you! I'm quit today, dammit!
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Day 21- the fog is a little better- fuzzy brain is only an infrequent visitor lately, and "brain not working" is getting better. and now, on to the major new twist-
So, I welcome each new craving in a way, because it's a chance to beat it down. And now, the latest trigger..... domestic problems- yes, issues with the spouse. What fun (joking, sarcastic). I haven't seen anyone post about this-- its embarassing and personal but it's also real so I'll do it.
Yeah, short of the death of a close family member, it's about the worst thing I could want. But it's happening, and its not bickering- rather, it's ran up credit card bills to the tune of thousands and thought I wouldn't notice, stole the bills from the mail for months to hide it from me, dropped my credit score into the tank. That's big. And the urges are strong, but I refuse to give in. This site and my accountabilty to others is now making ALL of the difference, because I would have definitely given in to the "fuck it all" of the situation and started chewing again in this situation if it weren't for the safety net i've built here with this site, and with you all. Thank you! I'm quit today, dammit!
You got it. Chewing will NOT solve your problem. I don't know how we ever let ourselves be fooled into thinking that way. Life is gonna be full of pain, joy, trouble, happy... Chew or not. You're choosing to deal with it as a clean n free man. Rock it...
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Day 21- the fog is a little better- fuzzy brain is only an infrequent visitor lately, and "brain not working" is getting better. and now, on to the major new twist-
So, I welcome each new craving in a way, because it's a chance to beat it down. And now, the latest trigger..... domestic problems- yes, issues with the spouse. What fun (joking, sarcastic). I haven't seen anyone post about this-- its embarassing and personal but it's also real so I'll do it.
Yeah, short of the death of a close family member, it's about the worst thing I could want. But it's happening, and its not bickering- rather, it's ran up credit card bills to the tune of thousands and thought I wouldn't notice, stole the bills from the mail for months to hide it from me, dropped my credit score into the tank. That's big. And the urges are strong, but I refuse to give in. This site and my accountabilty to others is now making ALL of the difference, because I would have definitely given in to the "fuck it all" of the situation and started chewing again in this situation if it weren't for the safety net i've built here with this site, and with you all. Thank you! I'm quit today, dammit!
You got it. Chewing will NOT solve your problem. I don't know how we ever let ourselves be fooled into thinking that way. Life is gonna be full of pain, joy, trouble, happy... Chew or not. You're choosing to deal with it as a clean n free man. Rock it...
Stay on course. Post roll, keep your word and repeat.
The storm is brewing and you will have a major battle. When you pass and weather that giant storm, the clouds will part and it will feel better than any buzz nicotine can offer.
Stay quit today and don't think about any fight tomorrow. Just get through today and repeat.
I promise you. Stay with the plan. Once you get to the HOF, you can decide and re-evaluate. For today, there is no tomorrow you only need to win today.
Grit it out and feel the pain. You'll look back and appreciate the pain and love the victory.
Can't stress it enough STAY THE COURSE!!
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Shit, that's tough stuff right there man, stay strong and do what you need to do to not cave. You'll get through this.
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Day 21- the fog is a little better- fuzzy brain is only an infrequent visitor lately, and "brain not working" is getting better. and now, on to the major new twist-
So, I welcome each new craving in a way, because it's a chance to beat it down. And now, the latest trigger..... domestic problems- yes, issues with the spouse. What fun (joking, sarcastic). I haven't seen anyone post about this-- its embarassing and personal but it's also real so I'll do it.
Yeah, short of the death of a close family member, it's about the worst thing I could want. But it's happening, and its not bickering- rather, it's ran up credit card bills to the tune of thousands and thought I wouldn't notice, stole the bills from the mail for months to hide it from me, dropped my credit score into the tank. That's big. And the urges are strong, but I refuse to give in. This site and my accountabilty to others is now making ALL of the difference, because I would have definitely given in to the "fuck it all" of the situation and started chewing again in this situation if it weren't for the safety net i've built here with this site, and with you all. Thank you! I'm quit today, dammit!
You got it. Chewing will NOT solve your problem. I don't know how we ever let ourselves be fooled into thinking that way. Life is gonna be full of pain, joy, trouble, happy... Chew or not. You're choosing to deal with it as a clean n free man. Rock it...
Stay on course. Post roll, keep your word and repeat.
The storm is brewing and you will have a major battle. When you pass and weather that giant storm, the clouds will part and it will feel better than any buzz nicotine can offer.
Stay quit today and don't think about any fight tomorrow. Just get through today and repeat.
I promise you. Stay with the plan. Once you get to the HOF, you can decide and re-evaluate. For today, there is no tomorrow you only need to win today.
Grit it out and feel the pain. You'll look back and appreciate the pain and love the victory.
Can't stress it enough STAY THE COURSE!!
Caving will make it worse. Getting raped by credit is pretty bad. However getting double teamed by the nic bitch and credit will be worse. Send me a text anytime if you need a brother – you know with this fog I’m easily distracted.
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Day 24-ish. The past few days i haven't had very bad fog. Still having home life issues so there have been craves for sure, but having this KTC community and method and support really helps. Today the fog seems to be creeping back and I don't know why. I will be spending the weekend away from family, so maybe it's the nic bitch in me messing with the rest of me. It won't work though, I"m not caving.
I'm getting a foggy brain and headache, and craves, and you know what, i'm thinkiing just bring it on, i'll get through it just fine. I do feel like sleeping but i'm at work. I should be able to slip out early and that will be nice. I"m wondering if the fog isn't some sort of anxiety over lonliness, since the family will be gone (and i've long realized that I used to think that chew was my little secret friend/mistress). So, probalbly this is all addict bullsh**, which means i can get through it, I have support, and when I beat it that's one less trigger situation I'l have to go through again.
So nice to have this sort of confidence and support, becuase I would have caved several times by now in the past.
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Day 24-ish. The past few days i haven't had very bad fog. Still having home life issues so there have been craves for sure, but having this KTC community and method and support really helps. Today the fog seems to be creeping back and I don't know why. I will be spending the weekend away from family, so maybe it's the nic bitch in me messing with the rest of me. It won't work though, I"m not caving.
I'm getting a foggy brain and headache, and craves, and you know what, i'm thinkiing just bring it on, i'll get through it just fine. I do feel like sleeping but i'm at work. I should be able to slip out early and that will be nice. I"m wondering if the fog isn't some sort of anxiety over lonliness, since the family will be gone (and i've long realized that I used to think that chew was my little secret friend/mistress). So, probalbly this is all addict bullsh**, which means i can get through it, I have support, and when I beat it that's one less trigger situation I'l have to go through again.
So nice to have this sort of confidence and support, becuase I would have caved several times by now in the past.
Your brain is being rewired to work without nicotine. Let those electricians get in there and fix that cranium. Focus on quitting and hang close to the site.
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Day 24-ish. The past few days i haven't had very bad fog. Still having home life issues so there have been craves for sure, but having this KTC community and method and support really helps. Today the fog seems to be creeping back and I don't know why. I will be spending the weekend away from family, so maybe it's the nic bitch in me messing with the rest of me. It won't work though, I"m not caving.
I'm getting a foggy brain and headache, and craves, and you know what, i'm thinkiing just bring it on, i'll get through it just fine. I do feel like sleeping but i'm at work. I should be able to slip out early and that will be nice. I"m wondering if the fog isn't some sort of anxiety over lonliness, since the family will be gone (and i've long realized that I used to think that chew was my little secret friend/mistress). So, probalbly this is all addict bullsh**, which means i can get through it, I have support, and when I beat it that's one less trigger situation I'l have to go through again.
So nice to have this sort of confidence and support, becuase I would have caved several times by now in the past.
Hey man, I got an empty house this weekend as the pregnant wife is headed out of town with friends. Been in a malaise for days or just in an overall funk. Same things are running through my head, "no one will know if you get a can, you deserve to reward yourself." It's all bullshit, we are stronger than this, let me know if you need anything.
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Updating, day 27 today... the weekend i spent a lot of time alone which caused a lot of triggers, like i expected. They come as little habitual instinct jabs, strong and sharp and seeming to come from my subconscious. Sometimes it i even feel it in my lips-- as a weird trigger or something. They pass quickly too, when I just recognize them and then let them go. But i have used a lot of gum lately, and sometimes I feel like i have to use the gum to get by. Some of that is lkely tension in my personal life too.
One thing I'm enjoying lately is not living the hidden life of ninja dipping. I don't have to sneak away to get a dip in, or worry about if i might need to spit, or wonder if its in my teeth when I talk to someone, or sneaking off to buy a can, or figuriing out how to hide my can when I go somewhere. Now I"m just me, without the dirty little secret, and that is great! Working on self-acceptance, because it's strange to not have to have the shame down inside.
A real highlight of the weekend was meeting up with KTC bro ihatecope and his brother when they came into Denver for the game. Feels good to have met the actual person who's going on the same path at about the same length of quit as me, and he's a great guy to boot! Fun meeting his brother too, who is also chew free but not nicotine free (yet).
Anxiety is a different experience without my old learned cope-ing technique. I"m having quite a bit from my family situation lately, and the main thing i notice is how hard it hits the body. Breathing is pretty helpful though, whereas I probably used to throw a dip in and make believe my problems were washed away. Hopefully the edge of the anxiety will soften as i get more used to how it really feels without addict behaviors on top of it. I also feel light headed, like the suck fog, sometimes from anxiety. How strange to actually be feeling and living my life unfiltered by the US Tobacco company! haha!!
That's it for today. I quit again today, it's worth it!
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Updating, day 27 today... the weekend i spent a lot of time alone which caused a lot of triggers, like i expected. They come as little habitual instinct jabs, strong and sharp and seeming to come from my subconscious. Sometimes it i even feel it in my lips-- as a weird trigger or something. They pass quickly too, when I just recognize them and then let them go. But i have used a lot of gum lately, and sometimes I feel like i have to use the gum to get by. Some of that is lkely tension in my personal life too.
One thing I'm enjoying lately is not living the hidden life of ninja dipping. I don't have to sneak away to get a dip in, or worry about if i might need to spit, or wonder if its in my teeth when I talk to someone, or sneaking off to buy a can, or figuriing out how to hide my can when I go somewhere. Now I"m just me, without the dirty little secret, and that is great! Working on self-acceptance, because it's strange to not have to have the shame down inside.
A real highlight of the weekend was meeting up with KTC bro ihatecope and his brother when they came into Denver for the game. Feels good to have met the actual person who's going on the same path at about the same length of quit as me, and he's a great guy to boot! Fun meeting his brother too, who is also chew free but not nicotine free (yet).
Anxiety is a different experience without my old learned cope-ing technique. I"m having quite a bit from my family situation lately, and the main thing i notice is how hard it hits the body. Breathing is pretty helpful though, whereas I probably used to throw a dip in and make believe my problems were washed away. Hopefully the edge of the anxiety will soften as i get more used to how it really feels without addict behaviors on top of it. I also feel light headed, like the suck fog, sometimes from anxiety. How strange to actually be feeling and living my life unfiltered by the US Tobacco company! haha!!
That's it for today. I quit again today, it's worth it!
goooo stuff! Thanks for writing it.
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Updating, day 27 today... the weekend i spent a lot of time alone which caused a lot of triggers, like i expected. They come as little habitual instinct jabs, strong and sharp and seeming to come from my subconscious. Sometimes it i even feel it in my lips-- as a weird trigger or something. They pass quickly too, when I just recognize them and then let them go. But i have used a lot of gum lately, and sometimes I feel like i have to use the gum to get by. Some of that is lkely tension in my personal life too.
One thing I'm enjoying lately is not living the hidden life of ninja dipping. I don't have to sneak away to get a dip in, or worry about if i might need to spit, or wonder if its in my teeth when I talk to someone, or sneaking off to buy a can, or figuriing out how to hide my can when I go somewhere. Now I"m just me, without the dirty little secret, and that is great! Working on self-acceptance, because it's strange to not have to have the shame down inside.
A real highlight of the weekend was meeting up with KTC bro ihatecope and his brother when they came into Denver for the game. Feels good to have met the actual person who's going on the same path at about the same length of quit as me, and he's a great guy to boot! Fun meeting his brother too, who is also chew free but not nicotine free (yet).
Anxiety is a different experience without my old learned cope-ing technique. I"m having quite a bit from my family situation lately, and the main thing i notice is how hard it hits the body. Breathing is pretty helpful though, whereas I probably used to throw a dip in and make believe my problems were washed away. Hopefully the edge of the anxiety will soften as i get more used to how it really feels without addict behaviors on top of it. I also feel light headed, like the suck fog, sometimes from anxiety. How strange to actually be feeling and living my life unfiltered by the US Tobacco company! haha!!
That's it for today. I quit again today, it's worth it!
Quit with you today. Stay on course and just focus all your quit into winning the battle today. Fight and call for backup when its too much. You will have an army of quitters that will circle the wagons around you and the nic bitch will retreat.
Use the tools you have here. The Prideful cave because they aren't humble to call for backup when they should.
Get numbers and use them!
-
Updating, day 27 today... the weekend i spent a lot of time alone which caused a lot of triggers, like i expected. They come as little habitual instinct jabs, strong and sharp and seeming to come from my subconscious. Sometimes it i even feel it in my lips-- as a weird trigger or something. They pass quickly too, when I just recognize them and then let them go. But i have used a lot of gum lately, and sometimes I feel like i have to use the gum to get by. Some of that is lkely tension in my personal life too.
One thing I'm enjoying lately is not living the hidden life of ninja dipping. I don't have to sneak away to get a dip in, or worry about if i might need to spit, or wonder if its in my teeth when I talk to someone, or sneaking off to buy a can, or figuriing out how to hide my can when I go somewhere. Now I"m just me, without the dirty little secret, and that is great! Working on self-acceptance, because it's strange to not have to have the shame down inside.
A real highlight of the weekend was meeting up with KTC bro ihatecope and his brother when they came into Denver for the game. Feels good to have met the actual person who's going on the same path at about the same length of quit as me, and he's a great guy to boot! Fun meeting his brother too, who is also chew free but not nicotine free (yet).
Anxiety is a different experience without my old learned cope-ing technique. I"m having quite a bit from my family situation lately, and the main thing i notice is how hard it hits the body. Breathing is pretty helpful though, whereas I probably used to throw a dip in and make believe my problems were washed away. Hopefully the edge of the anxiety will soften as i get more used to how it really feels without addict behaviors on top of it. I also feel light headed, like the suck fog, sometimes from anxiety. How strange to actually be feeling and living my life unfiltered by the US Tobacco company! haha!!
That's it for today. I quit again today, it's worth it!
Quit with you today. Stay on course and just focus all your quit into winning the battle today. Fight and call for backup when its too much. You will have an army of quitters that will circle the wagons around you and the nic bitch will retreat.
Use the tools you have here. The Prideful cave because they aren't humble to call for backup when they should.
Get numbers and use them!
As the others said, this is some good stuff. I enjoy reading your entries, they are full of self reflection that we can all learn and be inspired by.
Proud to be quit with you
-
Updating, day 27 today... the weekend i spent a lot of time alone which caused a lot of triggers, like i expected. They come as little habitual instinct jabs, strong and sharp and seeming to come from my subconscious. Sometimes it i even feel it in my lips-- as a weird trigger or something. They pass quickly too, when I just recognize them and then let them go. But i have used a lot of gum lately, and sometimes I feel like i have to use the gum to get by. Some of that is lkely tension in my personal life too.
One thing I'm enjoying lately is not living the hidden life of ninja dipping. I don't have to sneak away to get a dip in, or worry about if i might need to spit, or wonder if its in my teeth when I talk to someone, or sneaking off to buy a can, or figuriing out how to hide my can when I go somewhere. Now I"m just me, without the dirty little secret, and that is great! Working on self-acceptance, because it's strange to not have to have the shame down inside.
A real highlight of the weekend was meeting up with KTC bro ihatecope and his brother when they came into Denver for the game. Feels good to have met the actual person who's going on the same path at about the same length of quit as me, and he's a great guy to boot! Fun meeting his brother too, who is also chew free but not nicotine free (yet).
Anxiety is a different experience without my old learned cope-ing technique. I"m having quite a bit from my family situation lately, and the main thing i notice is how hard it hits the body. Breathing is pretty helpful though, whereas I probably used to throw a dip in and make believe my problems were washed away. Hopefully the edge of the anxiety will soften as i get more used to how it really feels without addict behaviors on top of it. I also feel light headed, like the suck fog, sometimes from anxiety. How strange to actually be feeling and living my life unfiltered by the US Tobacco company! haha!!
That's it for today. I quit again today, it's worth it!
Quit with you today. Stay on course and just focus all your quit into winning the battle today. Fight and call for backup when its too much. You will have an army of quitters that will circle the wagons around you and the nic bitch will retreat.
Use the tools you have here. The Prideful cave because they aren't humble to call for backup when they should.
Get numbers and use them!
As the others said, this is some good stuff. I enjoy reading your entries, they are full of self reflection that we can all learn and be inspired by.
Proud to be quit with you
Way to go. I had the anxiety too. It will pass. Congrats again - we are all right here with you.
Jayhawk
-
I feel really fortunate to have support, suggestions, and encouragement from some quitting heros, warriors, sherpas, and good bros, and i'm not trying to call out for help today (yet, at least). Just logging my gratitude first, because when things get tough I reread ALL of you guy's words and i get through. Lately, there have been a lot of reminders to reach out I need to, and I will. That' s not now though. Instead, right now I just want log where I am and to vent some.
Today, day 28, i'm getting slammed. I have a headache. Anxiety and anger were high early this morning, and now I just want sleep or watch a movie and fight a nap at the same time. I am able to focus on work a little more than in most of my quit so far, and that's a good thing. My home life is in the suck zone but I have a handful of people for support on that so it's not as bad as it could be-- i just have to trudge through it. Along with the main things I"m feeling physically, which are a nasty headache and occasional ebb and flow of craves (that feel entirely like missing my little emotional dysfunctional nic bitch lover), i'm also feeling rage. Yes, i'm pissed again. Pissed at fucking nicotine. Pissed at my own addiction. I feel like i'm in a grieving process over my addiction. First, I push it back--- denial, isolation. Then, I"m pissed at it. I don't dare drive, because if someone ticks me off i'll have a road rage performance to beat all, or alternatively i'll have to stuff the rage down inside. It woudln't be about them, it woudl be about the rage inside.
The rage is appropriate towards the addiction, i suppose, but I think it's also due to emotional processing about the flawed human that is an addict. That is, I think its a sort of becomeing unstuck from greiving -- i'm moving forward to acceptance. I've been told the steps of greiving are like this:
1. Denial/Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Sadness/Depression
5. Acceptance
So, I"m dancing all around this spectum, but a lot more towards anger this morning. Very interesting to me. Exactly what am I greiving? Is it just my flaws that I"m greiving about? Is it whatever emotional hole that nicotine was supposed to fill and that makes me prone to addiciton?- meaning am i greiving that i have that emptyness, finally acknowledging it, (which means that I can hope to heal from it?!?!?). This rings most true. Another option- i could be greiving the loss of my supposed friend, nic-bitch, after all these years. I hope it's more than that, because I hope for more healing than just my addiction, as hard as all this. So, I'll remain open to the other healing-- as long as I'm here, uncomfortable, I might as well try and make the most of the discomfort and foster the maximum growth I can. You don't make lasting changes and growth without discomfort, so this must be a really ripe time in my life for some growth. I'll take it, whatever comes, and I embrace this chance to do something I never have before- kick the nic-bitch, my biggest dirtly little secret for most of my life, out the f-ing door for good.
I'm starting to understand see some of the matrix in this KTC thing, and loving it. The recent caves discussions, newbie issues, plus getting to understand more about the vets, seems to all be helping me see a bigger picture. I love what i'm seeing.
I"m proud and grateful to be quit with everyone on this damned site today!
-
I feel really fortunate to have support, suggestions, and encouragement from some quitting heros, warriors, sherpas, and good bros, and i'm not trying to call out for help today (yet, at least). Just logging my gratitude first, because when things get tough I reread ALL of you guy's words and i get through. Lately, there have been a lot of reminders to reach out I need to, and I will. That' s not now though. Instead, right now I just want log where I am and to vent some.
Today, day 28, i'm getting slammed. I have a headache. Anxiety and anger were high early this morning, and now I just want sleep or watch a movie and fight a nap at the same time. I am able to focus on work a little more than in most of my quit so far, and that's a good thing. My home life is in the suck zone but I have a handful of people for support on that so it's not as bad as it could be-- i just have to trudge through it. Along with the main things I"m feeling physically, which are a nasty headache and occasional ebb and flow of craves (that feel entirely like missing my little emotional dysfunctional nic bitch lover), i'm also feeling rage. Yes, i'm pissed again. Pissed at fucking nicotine. Pissed at my own addiction. I feel like i'm in a grieving process over my addiction. First, I push it back--- denial, isolation. Then, I"m pissed at it. I don't dare drive, because if someone ticks me off i'll have a road rage performance to beat all, or alternatively i'll have to stuff the rage down inside. It woudln't be about them, it woudl be about the rage inside.
The rage is appropriate towards the addiction, i suppose, but I think it's also due to emotional processing about the flawed human that is an addict. That is, I think its a sort of becomeing unstuck from greiving -- i'm moving forward to acceptance. I've been told the steps of greiving are like this:
1. Denial/Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Sadness/Depression
5. Acceptance
So, I"m dancing all around this spectum, but a lot more towards anger this morning. Very interesting to me. Exactly what am I greiving? Is it just my flaws that I"m greiving about? Is it whatever emotional hole that nicotine was supposed to fill and that makes me prone to addiciton?- meaning am i greiving that i have that emptyness, finally acknowledging it, (which means that I can hope to heal from it?!?!?). This rings most true. Another option- i could be greiving the loss of my supposed friend, nic-bitch, after all these years. I hope it's more than that, because I hope for more healing than just my addiction, as hard as all this. So, I'll remain open to the other healing-- as long as I'm here, uncomfortable, I might as well try and make the most of the discomfort and foster the maximum growth I can. You don't make lasting changes and growth without discomfort, so this must be a really ripe time in my life for some growth. I'll take it, whatever comes, and I embrace this chance to do something I never have before- kick the nic-bitch, my biggest dirtly little secret for most of my life, out the f-ing door for good.
I'm starting to understand see some of the matrix in this KTC thing, and loving it. The recent caves discussions, newbie issues, plus getting to understand more about the vets, seems to all be helping me see a bigger picture. I love what i'm seeing.
I"m proud and grateful to be quit with everyone on this damned site today!
dang, 4 weeks well done.
gonna take a page from Crash Davis....."Don't think too much you will just hurt the ballclub". 'crackup'
Enjoy your quit, relish in what you have accomplished and take it one day at a time.
At the same time remember when you are having bad times and let it out, tell all of us here. Not because we are doctors or whatever, but because we have been there and because sharing of yourself builds those bonds of brotherhood.
nice job bud, just keep that head down and quit EDD.
-
I feel really fortunate to have support, suggestions, and encouragement from some quitting heros, warriors, sherpas, and good bros, and i'm not trying to call out for help today (yet, at least). Just logging my gratitude first, because when things get tough I reread ALL of you guy's words and i get through. Lately, there have been a lot of reminders to reach out I need to, and I will. That' s not now though. Instead, right now I just want log where I am and to vent some.
Today, day 28, i'm getting slammed. I have a headache. Anxiety and anger were high early this morning, and now I just want sleep or watch a movie and fight a nap at the same time. I am able to focus on work a little more than in most of my quit so far, and that's a good thing. My home life is in the suck zone but I have a handful of people for support on that so it's not as bad as it could be-- i just have to trudge through it. Along with the main things I"m feeling physically, which are a nasty headache and occasional ebb and flow of craves (that feel entirely like missing my little emotional dysfunctional nic bitch lover), i'm also feeling rage. Yes, i'm pissed again. Pissed at fucking nicotine. Pissed at my own addiction. I feel like i'm in a grieving process over my addiction. First, I push it back--- denial, isolation. Then, I"m pissed at it. I don't dare drive, because if someone ticks me off i'll have a road rage performance to beat all, or alternatively i'll have to stuff the rage down inside. It woudln't be about them, it woudl be about the rage inside.
The rage is appropriate towards the addiction, i suppose, but I think it's also due to emotional processing about the flawed human that is an addict. That is, I think its a sort of becomeing unstuck from greiving -- i'm moving forward to acceptance. I've been told the steps of greiving are like this:
1. Denial/Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Sadness/Depression
5. Acceptance
So, I"m dancing all around this spectum, but a lot more towards anger this morning. Very interesting to me. Exactly what am I greiving? Is it just my flaws that I"m greiving about? Is it whatever emotional hole that nicotine was supposed to fill and that makes me prone to addiciton?- meaning am i greiving that i have that emptyness, finally acknowledging it, (which means that I can hope to heal from it?!?!?). This rings most true. Another option- i could be greiving the loss of my supposed friend, nic-bitch, after all these years. I hope it's more than that, because I hope for more healing than just my addiction, as hard as all this. So, I'll remain open to the other healing-- as long as I'm here, uncomfortable, I might as well try and make the most of the discomfort and foster the maximum growth I can. You don't make lasting changes and growth without discomfort, so this must be a really ripe time in my life for some growth. I'll take it, whatever comes, and I embrace this chance to do something I never have before- kick the nic-bitch, my biggest dirtly little secret for most of my life, out the f-ing door for good.
I'm starting to understand see some of the matrix in this KTC thing, and loving it. The recent caves discussions, newbie issues, plus getting to understand more about the vets, seems to all be helping me see a bigger picture. I love what i'm seeing.Â
I"m proud and grateful to be quit with everyone on this damned site today!
dang, 4 weeks well done.
gonna take a page from Crash Davis....."Don't think too much you will just hurt the ballclub". 'crackup'
Enjoy your quit, relish in what you have accomplished and take it one day at a time.
At the same time remember when you are having bad times and let it out, tell all of us here. Not because we are doctors or whatever, but because we have been there and because sharing of yourself builds those bonds of brotherhood.
nice job bud, just keep that head down and quit EDD.
I like that you are writing all this down and getting it off your chest. It's very cathartic. Early in my quit I did the same except I didn't do it on here because I was too big a pussy to let others "see" how I was feeling. I had stacks and stacks of yellow legal paper that I used to write on and then carry around with me. I guarded them with my life. I didn't want anybody to see them, because what I was writting was basically that I was weak and that I missed my old "friend".
Many times I would sit down to write a hate letter to my "friend" and by the time I got done and read what I wrote...I had actually written a love letter about how much I missed it. I was stuck in denial for a long time. I skipped anger and bargaining and fell like a rock to sadness, but most specifically depression. Yet I continued to write on my yellow paper.
I kept all the papers in chronological order. Eventually as I came out of depression and to acceptance, I re read everything I had written. I hated it. I took what must have been about 500 pages of my yellow paper and I set it ablaze.
I regret that to no end. What I wouldn't give to go back and re read the raw emotions of my early struggles. I wish I would have done it here, as not only would people would have helped me along more quickly, it would always be here as a reminder of where I never want to go again. I have a lot of pages on my intro, but I should have much more.
I admire you for putting yourself out there. Although it sucks now, soon you will start to feel more and more progress and blow right through the acceptance stage and leave all the anxiety and anger in the dust.
You will feel like a fucking BOSS. It will be a glorious feeling, but the real beauty will be that you will be able to look back at your intro and really appreciate your journey because you were man enough to share how you were really feeling in the most difficult of times.
Keep it up. Not only are you helping yourself, you are inspiring a 534 day quit keyboard cowboy at the same time.
Much respect. You ever need anything, hit me up 24/7/365.
-
I feel really fortunate to have support, suggestions, and encouragement from some quitting heros, warriors, sherpas, and good bros, and i'm not trying to call out for help today (yet, at least). Just logging my gratitude first, because when things get tough I reread ALL of you guy's words and i get through. Lately, there have been a lot of reminders to reach out I need to, and I will. That' s not now though. Instead, right now I just want log where I am and to vent some.
Today, day 28, i'm getting slammed. I have a headache. Anxiety and anger were high early this morning, and now I just want sleep or watch a movie and fight a nap at the same time. I am able to focus on work a little more than in most of my quit so far, and that's a good thing. My home life is in the suck zone but I have a handful of people for support on that so it's not as bad as it could be-- i just have to trudge through it. Along with the main things I"m feeling physically, which are a nasty headache and occasional ebb and flow of craves (that feel entirely like missing my little emotional dysfunctional nic bitch lover), i'm also feeling rage. Yes, i'm pissed again. Pissed at fucking nicotine. Pissed at my own addiction. I feel like i'm in a grieving process over my addiction. First, I push it back--- denial, isolation. Then, I"m pissed at it. I don't dare drive, because if someone ticks me off i'll have a road rage performance to beat all, or alternatively i'll have to stuff the rage down inside. It woudln't be about them, it woudl be about the rage inside.
The rage is appropriate towards the addiction, i suppose, but I think it's also due to emotional processing about the flawed human that is an addict. That is, I think its a sort of becomeing unstuck from greiving -- i'm moving forward to acceptance. I've been told the steps of greiving are like this:
1. Denial/Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Sadness/Depression
5. Acceptance
So, I"m dancing all around this spectum, but a lot more towards anger this morning. Very interesting to me. Exactly what am I greiving? Is it just my flaws that I"m greiving about? Is it whatever emotional hole that nicotine was supposed to fill and that makes me prone to addiciton?- meaning am i greiving that i have that emptyness, finally acknowledging it, (which means that I can hope to heal from it?!?!?). This rings most true. Another option- i could be greiving the loss of my supposed friend, nic-bitch, after all these years. I hope it's more than that, because I hope for more healing than just my addiction, as hard as all this. So, I'll remain open to the other healing-- as long as I'm here, uncomfortable, I might as well try and make the most of the discomfort and foster the maximum growth I can. You don't make lasting changes and growth without discomfort, so this must be a really ripe time in my life for some growth. I'll take it, whatever comes, and I embrace this chance to do something I never have before- kick the nic-bitch, my biggest dirtly little secret for most of my life, out the f-ing door for good.
I'm starting to understand see some of the matrix in this KTC thing, and loving it. The recent caves discussions, newbie issues, plus getting to understand more about the vets, seems to all be helping me see a bigger picture. I love what i'm seeing. Â
I"m proud and grateful to be quit with everyone on this damned site today!
dang, 4 weeks well done.
gonna take a page from Crash Davis....."Don't think too much you will just hurt the ballclub". 'crackup'
Enjoy your quit, relish in what you have accomplished and take it one day at a time.
At the same time remember when you are having bad times and let it out, tell all of us here. Not because we are doctors or whatever, but because we have been there and because sharing of yourself builds those bonds of brotherhood.
nice job bud, just keep that head down and quit EDD.
I like that you are writing all this down and getting it off your chest. It's very cathartic. Early in my quit I did the same except I didn't do it on here because I was too big a pussy to let others "see" how I was feeling. I had stacks and stacks of yellow legal paper that I used to write on and then carry around with me. I guarded them with my life. I didn't want anybody to see them, because what I was writting was basically that I was weak and that I missed my old "friend".
Many times I would sit down to write a hate letter to my "friend" and by the time I got done and read what I wrote...I had actually written a love letter about how much I missed it. I was stuck in denial for a long time. I skipped anger and bargaining and fell like a rock to sadness, but most specifically depression. Yet I continued to write on my yellow paper.
I kept all the papers in chronological order. Eventually as I came out of depression and to acceptance, I re read everything I had written. I hated it. I took what must have been about 500 pages of my yellow paper and I set it ablaze.
I regret that to no end. What I wouldn't give to go back and re read the raw emotions of my early struggles. I wish I would have done it here, as not only would people would have helped me along more quickly, it would always be here as a reminder of where I never want to go again. I have a lot of pages on my intro, but I should have much more.
I admire you for putting yourself out there. Although it sucks now, soon you will start to feel more and more progress and blow right through the acceptance stage and leave all the anxiety and anger in the dust.
You will feel like a fucking BOSS. It will be a glorious feeling, but the real beauty will be that you will be able to look back at your intro and really appreciate your journey because you were man enough to share how you were really feeling in the most difficult of times.
Keep it up. Not only are you helping yourself, you are inspiring a 534 day quit keyboard cowboy at the same time.
Much respect. You ever need anything, hit me up 24/7/365.
Thanks you guys- both of you are sharing good wisdom here from your own perspectives and it helps, and the support feels great! I'm honored.
-
Updating, day 27 today... the weekend i spent a lot of time alone which caused a lot of triggers, like i expected. They come as little habitual instinct jabs, strong and sharp and seeming to come from my subconscious. Sometimes it i even feel it in my lips-- as a weird trigger or something. They pass quickly too, when I just recognize them and then let them go. But i have used a lot of gum lately, and sometimes I feel like i have to use the gum to get by. Some of that is lkely tension in my personal life too.
One thing I'm enjoying lately is not living the hidden life of ninja dipping. I don't have to sneak away to get a dip in, or worry about if i might need to spit, or wonder if its in my teeth when I talk to someone, or sneaking off to buy a can, or figuriing out how to hide my can when I go somewhere. Now I"m just me, without the dirty little secret, and that is great! Working on self-acceptance, because it's strange to not have to have the shame down inside.
A real highlight of the weekend was meeting up with KTC bro ihatecope and his brother when they came into Denver for the game. Feels good to have met the actual person who's going on the same path at about the same length of quit as me, and he's a great guy to boot! Fun meeting his brother too, who is also chew free but not nicotine free (yet).
Anxiety is a different experience without my old learned cope-ing technique. I"m having quite a bit from my family situation lately, and the main thing i notice is how hard it hits the body. Breathing is pretty helpful though, whereas I probably used to throw a dip in and make believe my problems were washed away. Hopefully the edge of the anxiety will soften as i get more used to how it really feels without addict behaviors on top of it. I also feel light headed, like the suck fog, sometimes from anxiety. How strange to actually be feeling and living my life unfiltered by the US Tobacco company! haha!!
That's it for today. I quit again today, it's worth it!
Quit with you today. Stay on course and just focus all your quit into winning the battle today. Fight and call for backup when its too much. You will have an army of quitters that will circle the wagons around you and the nic bitch will retreat.
Use the tools you have here. The Prideful cave because they aren't humble to call for backup when they should.
Get numbers and use them!
As the others said, this is some good stuff. I enjoy reading your entries, they are full of self reflection that we can all learn and be inspired by.
Proud to be quit with you
Way to go. I had the anxiety too. It will pass. Congrats again - we are all right here with you.
Jayhawk
Seeing the Broncos beat up KC was awesome and meeting up with you was icing on the cake. I really think meeting a KTC brother strengthen my quit which I am grateful for. P.S. I am working on my brothers. I hate the nic bitch so much I can stand by to see anyone I care for be enslaved and poisoned.
-
I feel really fortunate to have support, suggestions, and encouragement from some quitting heros, warriors, sherpas, and good bros, and i'm not trying to call out for help today (yet, at least). Just logging my gratitude first, because when things get tough I reread ALL of you guy's words and i get through. Lately, there have been a lot of reminders to reach out I need to, and I will. That' s not now though. Instead, right now I just want log where I am and to vent some.
Today, day 28, i'm getting slammed. I have a headache. Anxiety and anger were high early this morning, and now I just want sleep or watch a movie and fight a nap at the same time. I am able to focus on work a little more than in most of my quit so far, and that's a good thing. My home life is in the suck zone but I have a handful of people for support on that so it's not as bad as it could be-- i just have to trudge through it. Along with the main things I"m feeling physically, which are a nasty headache and occasional ebb and flow of craves (that feel entirely like missing my little emotional dysfunctional nic bitch lover), i'm also feeling rage. Yes, i'm pissed again. Pissed at fucking nicotine. Pissed at my own addiction. I feel like i'm in a grieving process over my addiction. First, I push it back--- denial, isolation. Then, I"m pissed at it. I don't dare drive, because if someone ticks me off i'll have a road rage performance to beat all, or alternatively i'll have to stuff the rage down inside. It woudln't be about them, it woudl be about the rage inside.
The rage is appropriate towards the addiction, i suppose, but I think it's also due to emotional processing about the flawed human that is an addict. That is, I think its a sort of becomeing unstuck from greiving -- i'm moving forward to acceptance. I've been told the steps of greiving are like this:
1. Denial/Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Sadness/Depression
5. Acceptance
So, I"m dancing all around this spectum, but a lot more towards anger this morning. Very interesting to me. Exactly what am I greiving? Is it just my flaws that I"m greiving about? Is it whatever emotional hole that nicotine was supposed to fill and that makes me prone to addiciton?- meaning am i greiving that i have that emptyness, finally acknowledging it, (which means that I can hope to heal from it?!?!?). This rings most true. Another option- i could be greiving the loss of my supposed friend, nic-bitch, after all these years. I hope it's more than that, because I hope for more healing than just my addiction, as hard as all this. So, I'll remain open to the other healing-- as long as I'm here, uncomfortable, I might as well try and make the most of the discomfort and foster the maximum growth I can. You don't make lasting changes and growth without discomfort, so this must be a really ripe time in my life for some growth. I'll take it, whatever comes, and I embrace this chance to do something I never have before- kick the nic-bitch, my biggest dirtly little secret for most of my life, out the f-ing door for good.
I'm starting to understand see some of the matrix in this KTC thing, and loving it. The recent caves discussions, newbie issues, plus getting to understand more about the vets, seems to all be helping me see a bigger picture. I love what i'm seeing. Â
I"m proud and grateful to be quit with everyone on this damned site today!
dang, 4 weeks well done.
gonna take a page from Crash Davis....."Don't think too much you will just hurt the ballclub". 'crackup'
Enjoy your quit, relish in what you have accomplished and take it one day at a time.
At the same time remember when you are having bad times and let it out, tell all of us here. Not because we are doctors or whatever, but because we have been there and because sharing of yourself builds those bonds of brotherhood.
nice job bud, just keep that head down and quit EDD.
I like that you are writing all this down and getting it off your chest. It's very cathartic. Early in my quit I did the same except I didn't do it on here because I was too big a pussy to let others "see" how I was feeling. I had stacks and stacks of yellow legal paper that I used to write on and then carry around with me. I guarded them with my life. I didn't want anybody to see them, because what I was writting was basically that I was weak and that I missed my old "friend".
Many times I would sit down to write a hate letter to my "friend" and by the time I got done and read what I wrote...I had actually written a love letter about how much I missed it. I was stuck in denial for a long time. I skipped anger and bargaining and fell like a rock to sadness, but most specifically depression. Yet I continued to write on my yellow paper.
I kept all the papers in chronological order. Eventually as I came out of depression and to acceptance, I re read everything I had written. I hated it. I took what must have been about 500 pages of my yellow paper and I set it ablaze.
I regret that to no end. What I wouldn't give to go back and re read the raw emotions of my early struggles. I wish I would have done it here, as not only would people would have helped me along more quickly, it would always be here as a reminder of where I never want to go again. I have a lot of pages on my intro, but I should have much more.
I admire you for putting yourself out there. Although it sucks now, soon you will start to feel more and more progress and blow right through the acceptance stage and leave all the anxiety and anger in the dust.
You will feel like a fucking BOSS. It will be a glorious feeling, but the real beauty will be that you will be able to look back at your intro and really appreciate your journey because you were man enough to share how you were really feeling in the most difficult of times.
Keep it up. Not only are you helping yourself, you are inspiring a 534 day quit keyboard cowboy at the same time.
Much respect. You ever need anything, hit me up 24/7/365.
Thanks you guys- both of you are sharing good wisdom here from your own perspectives and it helps, and the support feels great! I'm honored.
Keep writing it allows you to organize your thoughts and vent which helps. It also helps me and other quit brothers who have had similar feelings. Bravo. Just always remember that the nic bitch doesnÂ’t fill any emotional holes. She is and always will be a consumer. Fill those emotional holes with positives such as writing on this site and making new KTC friends. IÂ’m FÂ’n proud to be quitting with you.
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Congrats Day 30. That would be a month of wins. Keep quitting and I'll keep following.
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I feel really fortunate to have support, suggestions, and encouragement from some quitting heros, warriors, sherpas, and good bros, and i'm not trying to call out for help today (yet, at least). Just logging my gratitude first, because when things get tough I reread ALL of you guy's words and i get through. Lately, there have been a lot of reminders to reach out I need to, and I will. That' s not now though. Instead, right now I just want log where I am and to vent some.
Today, day 28, i'm getting slammed. I have a headache. Anxiety and anger were high early this morning, and now I just want sleep or watch a movie and fight a nap at the same time. I am able to focus on work a little more than in most of my quit so far, and that's a good thing. My home life is in the suck zone but I have a handful of people for support on that so it's not as bad as it could be-- i just have to trudge through it. Along with the main things I"m feeling physically, which are a nasty headache and occasional ebb and flow of craves (that feel entirely like missing my little emotional dysfunctional nic bitch lover), i'm also feeling rage. Yes, i'm pissed again. Pissed at fucking nicotine. Pissed at my own addiction. I feel like i'm in a grieving process over my addiction. First, I push it back--- denial, isolation. Then, I"m pissed at it. I don't dare drive, because if someone ticks me off i'll have a road rage performance to beat all, or alternatively i'll have to stuff the rage down inside. It woudln't be about them, it woudl be about the rage inside.
The rage is appropriate towards the addiction, i suppose, but I think it's also due to emotional processing about the flawed human that is an addict. That is, I think its a sort of becomeing unstuck from greiving -- i'm moving forward to acceptance. I've been told the steps of greiving are like this:
1. Denial/Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Sadness/Depression
5. Acceptance
So, I"m dancing all around this spectum, but a lot more towards anger this morning. Very interesting to me. Exactly what am I greiving? Is it just my flaws that I"m greiving about? Is it whatever emotional hole that nicotine was supposed to fill and that makes me prone to addiciton?- meaning am i greiving that i have that emptyness, finally acknowledging it, (which means that I can hope to heal from it?!?!?). This rings most true. Another option- i could be greiving the loss of my supposed friend, nic-bitch, after all these years. I hope it's more than that, because I hope for more healing than just my addiction, as hard as all this. So, I'll remain open to the other healing-- as long as I'm here, uncomfortable, I might as well try and make the most of the discomfort and foster the maximum growth I can. You don't make lasting changes and growth without discomfort, so this must be a really ripe time in my life for some growth. I'll take it, whatever comes, and I embrace this chance to do something I never have before- kick the nic-bitch, my biggest dirtly little secret for most of my life, out the f-ing door for good.
I'm starting to understand see some of the matrix in this KTC thing, and loving it. The recent caves discussions, newbie issues, plus getting to understand more about the vets, seems to all be helping me see a bigger picture. I love what i'm seeing. Â
I"m proud and grateful to be quit with everyone on this damned site today!
dang, 4 weeks well done.
gonna take a page from Crash Davis....."Don't think too much you will just hurt the ballclub". 'crackup'
Enjoy your quit, relish in what you have accomplished and take it one day at a time.
At the same time remember when you are having bad times and let it out, tell all of us here. Not because we are doctors or whatever, but because we have been there and because sharing of yourself builds those bonds of brotherhood.
nice job bud, just keep that head down and quit EDD.
I like that you are writing all this down and getting it off your chest. It's very cathartic. Early in my quit I did the same except I didn't do it on here because I was too big a pussy to let others "see" how I was feeling. I had stacks and stacks of yellow legal paper that I used to write on and then carry around with me. I guarded them with my life. I didn't want anybody to see them, because what I was writting was basically that I was weak and that I missed my old "friend".
Many times I would sit down to write a hate letter to my "friend" and by the time I got done and read what I wrote...I had actually written a love letter about how much I missed it. I was stuck in denial for a long time. I skipped anger and bargaining and fell like a rock to sadness, but most specifically depression. Yet I continued to write on my yellow paper.
I kept all the papers in chronological order. Eventually as I came out of depression and to acceptance, I re read everything I had written. I hated it. I took what must have been about 500 pages of my yellow paper and I set it ablaze.
I regret that to no end. What I wouldn't give to go back and re read the raw emotions of my early struggles. I wish I would have done it here, as not only would people would have helped me along more quickly, it would always be here as a reminder of where I never want to go again. I have a lot of pages on my intro, but I should have much more.
I admire you for putting yourself out there. Although it sucks now, soon you will start to feel more and more progress and blow right through the acceptance stage and leave all the anxiety and anger in the dust.
You will feel like a fucking BOSS. It will be a glorious feeling, but the real beauty will be that you will be able to look back at your intro and really appreciate your journey because you were man enough to share how you were really feeling in the most difficult of times.
Keep it up. Not only are you helping yourself, you are inspiring a 534 day quit keyboard cowboy at the same time.
Much respect. You ever need anything, hit me up 24/7/365.
Thanks you guys- both of you are sharing good wisdom here from your own perspectives and it helps, and the support feels great! I'm honored.
Keep writing it allows you to organize your thoughts and vent which helps. It also helps me and other quit brothers who have had similar feelings. Bravo. Just always remember that the nic bitch doesnÂ’t fill any emotional holes. She is and always will be a consumer. Fill those emotional holes with positives such as writing on this site and making new KTC friends. IÂ’m FÂ’n proud to be quitting with you.
Wow this is brotherhood in action, and i appreciate it. Thanks ihc!
New surprise for the quit log today, day 30. Yesterday, Big Russ (one day ahead of me) was struggling with a mean fog. I was feeling for him, but also feeling lucky it wasn't me. Then, at 4 am, right on time, the nic bitch work me up. This time though, it was something new. What woke me up was the sensation of a big ol' dip in my lower lip (I used to put dips all over in my lips, not just there). It wasn't a dip dream where I was dipping in the dream, like some have been reporting, but just the sensation that work me up and stayed with me for an instant when I started waking. Then, a mean and strong suck fog, like the in single digit days of my quit, came on strong. And along with that came some headache flutters, and my guts were loud too. What the?????
What a sneaky little nic-bitch this morning at my house! really? waking me up with a chew sensation and then a killer fog again?!? Fuck off bitch! It might have worked before. I have to kind of chuckle at the novelty of it- i sure didn't expect it. But I got this one today. I know better, and I'm supported as all hell in my quit. The fog and headache are still here and I'll wait them out as much as i have to, sneaky little bitch ain't gonna get me today. I"m quitting for my life along with all the January Killers, February Flapper Flyers, and all the other sherpa-hero-bros and sisters here.
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Now that is what I call a Quitter. Determined, Motivated, take no prisoners, I will kick your ass no matter what, kind of quitter. Way to be Brettlees
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One month???!!!
Damn, that is sweet. Good work.
You got one hell of a quit going. Don't give that bitch an inch. She will be relentless, which means you will have to be as well, and you have!!!
You feel weak or need some reinforcements, we are here for you. You don't have to battle this whore alone. You have mad backup.
Quit on...
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What's up man? How'd your weekend go?
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What's up man? How'd your weekend go?
Guess I better do an update- thanks for checking. On day 34 now.
The weekend quit was good overall. My gums are a little weird again, but it seems ok, they are probably just still heaing from decads of abuse. This is surely the longest they haven't been assaulted by shitjuice in at least a decade, when I last stopped for a while (using wellbutrin that time, but quitting for others and not myself).
The craves have changed. I don't have any fear of complacency, even though the fog seems to be cleared up pretty well lately. FOr a while, the craves were like ninja attacks with knives- sneaky, sharp, and deep. Now, they feel more like defensive linemen sacking an unaware quarterback. Sometimes when my guard is down, i'm not being wary at all, WHAM!!! big crave, hard, feeling like it is something purely and strongly habitual. THere doesn't seem to be any particular sort of trigger, rather than just being unaware. I"m still having spouse struggles-- and so craves from time to time there can be expected. I still get a crave now and then when I"m alone and aware of it. And I get them at other random times. They strike really hard, but i get through them. THere are probably 3-5 big ones per day.
I'm seeing these ones as strength training for later. Because they hit hard, I really have to try hard to get through them, and I do get through. Im thinking this little period will help prepare me for later, when I might get more complacent, and a crave come out of nowhere. At least I'll have some experience smacking some freight-train style craves back down (or maybe alternatively, flowing through them to let them pass).
Reading everyone else's posts continues to be source of strength to me, as to messages from some quit bros and sherpas. Thanks guys. I"m also noticing that it does help me to try and help others, just as the site promises. Proud to quit with KTC today!
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What's up man? How'd your weekend go?
Guess I better do an update- thanks for checking. On day 34 now.
The weekend quit was good overall. My gums are a little weird again, but it seems ok, they are probably just still heaing from decads of abuse. This is surely the longest they haven't been assaulted by shitjuice in at least a decade, when I last stopped for a while (using wellbutrin that time, but quitting for others and not myself).
The craves have changed. I don't have any fear of complacency, even though the fog seems to be cleared up pretty well lately. FOr a while, the craves were like ninja attacks with knives- sneaky, sharp, and deep. Now, they feel more like defensive linemen sacking an unaware quarterback. Sometimes when my guard is down, i'm not being wary at all, WHAM!!! big crave, hard, feeling like it is something purely and strongly habitual. THere doesn't seem to be any particular sort of trigger, rather than just being unaware. I"m still having spouse struggles-- and so craves from time to time there can be expected. I still get a crave now and then when I"m alone and aware of it. And I get them at other random times. They strike really hard, but i get through them. THere are probably 3-5 big ones per day.
I'm seeing these ones as strength training for later. Because they hit hard, I really have to try hard to get through them, and I do get through. Im thinking this little period will help prepare me for later, when I might get more complacent, and a crave come out of nowhere. At least I'll have some experience smacking some freight-train style craves back down (or maybe alternatively, flowing through them to let them pass).
Reading everyone else's posts continues to be source of strength to me, as to messages from some quit bros and sherpas. Thanks guys. I"m also noticing that it does help me to try and help others, just as the site promises. Proud to quit with KTC today!
Nice update. I remember that change in nic attack style too. I think it is your nic part of your brain realizing that the usual attacks don't work anymore, and is poking around for other paths.
As they kept telling me... You are making good use of your KTC library card... Keep using it. Reread some things you already read.. They will have new meaning at this point in your quit.
Stay strong... PM me if you need another number.
Glad to be quit with you
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What's up man? How'd your weekend go?
Guess I better do an update- thanks for checking. On day 34 now.
The weekend quit was good overall. My gums are a little weird again, but it seems ok, they are probably just still heaing from decads of abuse. This is surely the longest they haven't been assaulted by shitjuice in at least a decade, when I last stopped for a while (using wellbutrin that time, but quitting for others and not myself).
The craves have changed. I don't have any fear of complacency, even though the fog seems to be cleared up pretty well lately. FOr a while, the craves were like ninja attacks with knives- sneaky, sharp, and deep. Now, they feel more like defensive linemen sacking an unaware quarterback. Sometimes when my guard is down, i'm not being wary at all, WHAM!!! big crave, hard, feeling like it is something purely and strongly habitual. THere doesn't seem to be any particular sort of trigger, rather than just being unaware. I"m still having spouse struggles-- and so craves from time to time there can be expected. I still get a crave now and then when I"m alone and aware of it. And I get them at other random times. They strike really hard, but i get through them. THere are probably 3-5 big ones per day.
I'm seeing these ones as strength training for later. Because they hit hard, I really have to try hard to get through them, and I do get through. Im thinking this little period will help prepare me for later, when I might get more complacent, and a crave come out of nowhere. At least I'll have some experience smacking some freight-train style craves back down (or maybe alternatively, flowing through them to let them pass).
Reading everyone else's posts continues to be source of strength to me, as to messages from some quit bros and sherpas. Thanks guys. I"m also noticing that it does help me to try and help others, just as the site promises. Proud to quit with KTC today!
Nice update. I remember that change in nic attack style too. I think it is your nic part of your brain realizing that the usual attacks don't work anymore, and is poking around for other paths.
As they kept telling me... You are making good use of your KTC library card... Keep using it. Reread some things you already read.. They will have new meaning at this point in your quit.
Stay strong... PM me if you need another number.
Glad to be quit with you
Keep going. Things are changing and will change, but for the better. Sounds like the craves and fog is easing up - and that is good. Life continues to get better.
Just don't forget - especially when those bastard out of the blue craves hit you - just fight this thing minute by minute if you have to. Power through it. You are not going to let this beat you.
Keep on posting those +1s.
Proud to be quit with you
Jayhawk
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Thanks for the encouragement guys!
I noticed that Syndrome had posted a list of questions for Feb 14 FFFoQ to answer. Reminded me that i never did a full intro here either. I'll answer the questions he posted, below.
Who are you? Brett
Are you married? No, but living together for 4 years, with a "common law" wife, and that seems to be coming apart at the seams lately. Was married for 3 years once, ended in divorce.
Do you have kids? 3 steps that I"ve taken as my own for the past 6+ years: 12 yr Girl, 10 yo boy, 8 yo boy (9 this week!).
Where you from? South Dakota originally, Colorado now, with long stays in California, Kansas in between.
How Old are you? 49 and holding!
Worst trigger so far? Habitual times- when I let my guard down.
What do you do for a living? attorney- Native American rights and Estate planning, mostly, for the past 17 years
How long and what did you dip? 1st dips- 5th grade in summers, mostly leaf. Cope and Skoal later, but didn't get addicted until later in high school- Skoal then. Probably age 17. Cope came later- college. Cope was my main mistress ever since. The fresher the better. I"ve been a master ninja dipper for decades. and now I"m going to be a master quitter and quitter sherpa for others, for decades to come!
There it is, for the record. Glad to quit with you all, this is a life-changing site!
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Thanks for the encouragement guys!
I noticed that Syndrome had posted a list of questions for Feb 14 FFFoQ to answer. Reminded me that i never did a full intro here either. I'll answer the questions he posted, below.
Who are you? Brett
Are you married? No, but living together for 4 years, with a "common law" wife, and that seems to be coming apart at the seams lately. Was married for 3 years once, ended in divorce.
Do you have kids? 3 steps that I"ve taken as my own for the past 6+ years: 12 yr Girl, 10 yo boy, 8 yo boy (9 this week!).
Where you from? South Dakota originally, Colorado now, with long stays in California, Kansas in between.
How Old are you? 49 and holding!
Worst trigger so far? Habitual times- when I let my guard down.
What do you do for a living? attorney- Native American rights and Estate planning, mostly, for the past 17 years
How long and what did you dip? 1st dips- 5th grade in summers, mostly leaf. Cope and Skoal later, but didn't get addicted until later in high school- Skoal then. Probably age 17. Cope came later- college. Cope was my main mistress ever since. The fresher the better. I"ve been a master ninja dipper for decades. and now I"m going to be a master quitter and quitter sherpa for others, for decades to come!
There it is, for the record. Glad to quit with you all, this is a life-changing site!
Hey Brettlees, Didn't know you were an attorney too. There are a bunch of us on this site. Heck, we may be running a close second to drivers as the most common profession around here.
My intro has a few updates about dipping in trial and my first dip free court appearances, might be worth a look.
Keep up the good work
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Thanks for the encouragement guys!Â
I noticed that Syndrome had posted a list of questions for Feb 14 FFFoQ to answer. Reminded me that i never did a full intro here either. I'll answer the questions he posted, below.
Who are you? Brett
Are you married? No, but living together for 4 years, with a "common law" wife, and that seems to be coming apart at the seams lately. Was married for 3 years once, ended in divorce.
Do you have kids? 3 steps that I"ve taken as my own for the past 6+ years: 12 yr Girl, 10 yo boy, 8 yo boy (9 this week!).Â
Where you from? South Dakota originally, Colorado now, with long stays in California, Kansas in between.
How Old are you? 49 and holding!
Worst trigger so far? Habitual times- when I let my guard down.
What do you do for a living? attorney- Native American rights and Estate planning, mostly, for the past 17 years
How long and what did you dip? 1st dips- 5th grade in summers, mostly leaf. Cope and Skoal later, but didn't get addicted until later in high school- Skoal then. Probably age 17. Cope came later- college. Cope was my main mistress ever since. The fresher the better. I"ve been a master ninja dipper for decades. and now I"m going to be a master quitter and quitter sherpa for others, for decades to come!
There it is, for the record. Glad to quit with you all, this is a life-changing site!
Hey Brettlees, Didn't know you were an attorney too. There are a bunch of us on this site. Heck, we may be running a close second to drivers as the most common profession around here.
My intro has a few updates about dipping in trial and my first dip free court appearances, might be worth a look.
Keep up the good work
Thanks Slim- sent you a PM too. Your intro string has been worth a look for me for a lot more than just shared job experiences, too! For years, I thought I must be the only one in my job that had a dirty little secret. Figured it was from my "backwoods" childhood. Don't know what to think now what i'm discovering it's a common profession here- other than I"m glad we're all quit here!
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Thanks for the encouragement guys! Â
I noticed that Syndrome had posted a list of questions for Feb 14 FFFoQ to answer. Reminded me that i never did a full intro here either. I'll answer the questions he posted, below.
Who are you? Brett
Are you married? No, but living together for 4 years, with a "common law" wife, and that seems to be coming apart at the seams lately. Was married for 3 years once, ended in divorce.
Do you have kids? 3 steps that I"ve taken as my own for the past 6+ years: 12 yr Girl, 10 yo boy, 8 yo boy (9 this week!).Â
Where you from? South Dakota originally, Colorado now, with long stays in California, Kansas in between.
How Old are you? 49 and holding!
Worst trigger so far? Habitual times- when I let my guard down.
What do you do for a living? attorney- Native American rights and Estate planning, mostly, for the past 17 years
How long and what did you dip? 1st dips- 5th grade in summers, mostly leaf. Cope and Skoal later, but didn't get addicted until later in high school- Skoal then. Probably age 17. Cope came later- college. Cope was my main mistress ever since. The fresher the better. I"ve been a master ninja dipper for decades. and now I"m going to be a master quitter and quitter sherpa for others, for decades to come!
There it is, for the record. Glad to quit with you all, this is a life-changing site!
Hey Brettlees, Didn't know you were an attorney too. There are a bunch of us on this site. Heck, we may be running a close second to drivers as the most common profession around here.
My intro has a few updates about dipping in trial and my first dip free court appearances, might be worth a look.
Keep up the good work
Thanks Slim- sent you a PM too. Your intro string has been worth a look for me for a lot more than just shared job experiences, too! For years, I thought I must be the only one in my job that had a dirty little secret. Figured it was from my "backwoods" childhood. Don't know what to think now what i'm discovering it's a common profession here- other than I"m glad we're all quit here!
Sharks are mean quit winners. I'm glad you are in my accountability network. QLF
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So yesterday was my birthday, and i want to put down in writing that but for finding this site and the support and education it provides, the event would have gone something like the past umpteen birthdays, new years days, first of certain months, anniversaries of certain events, first day of seasons, etc : I would have planneed it as a quit date. Probably taking the "last chew" the night before, intending to be clean the whole actual birthday. The next morning I would get up, and might subconsciously take the morning dip. Or, alternatively, wait a while then after breakfast have "just one more, to celebrate that this is the last day". Then, later, probably after lunch, take one more, to "Celebrate, because this is the last day, there will be no more after this, I'm quitting." Then, at least by after supper, "Just one more, to celebrate, because starting tonight, on this special day, I will be clean, quit." Then, before, bed, "Just one more, last dip, because I'm quitting- this was my last day, i'll be clean every day after this one from here on out." Lather, rinse, and repeat the next day. For years! What a trap. After a few years, I even knew inside I'd do it each time i chose the next "quit" date.
Instead of another failed birthday, yesterday I gave myself a day free of nicotine in any form. It really passed without much significance to me, and I"m happy about that really. I succeeded on that day, first time ever. What a gift! That's plenty for me. Maybe I"ll have a new personal holiday in the future- maybe October 23 will be my "life day" in honor of the day I decided to give myself freedom from the nicbitch. Wouldn't have done it without stumbling on this site and this site's urging me to drop all nicotine, including the nicotine gum i had been on exclusively for 22 days before. Wouldn't have done it without Bean, traumagnet, and ParadigmDawg popping in for immediate support once I first posted, making sure i was prepared and completely nicotine free. And I wouldn't have made it through to celebrate it by being nic free again today, without each and every person who has ever posted in my thread, sent me a PM, sent a text, or posted things for the benefit of other quitters like me that I have read here. So thanks everyone, here's to you! And here's to me, dammit! I did it! Next up, i'll be doing a +1 QLF with all my bros here!
Symptom log: still big strong craves, 3-5 times a day. They are not very tempting anymore, so I expect a change in nicbitch tactics. Bring it bitch, i'll smack it down.
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I say congrats on your birthday present to yourself. We got along road ahead of us ,but if we use this site to its full advantage all of us together can get through this road one day at a time.
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I say congrats on your birthday present to yourself. We got along road ahead of us ,but if we use this site to its full advantage all of us together can get through this road one day at a time.
Heck yeah but we gotta be on one road or another and I'm proud to be on this particular one with you bro- all us Killing the Can types are changing lives and dropping nic bitch to the curb withou mercy! Thanks for being in my journey!
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I say congrats on your birthday present to yourself. We got along road ahead of us ,but if we use this site to its full advantage all of us together can get through this road one day at a time.
Heck yeah but we gotta be on one road or another and I'm proud to be on this particular one with you bro- all us Killing the Can types are changing lives and dropping nic bitch to the curb withou mercy! Thanks for being in my journey!
keep documenting your '1st time sans nic' it's a great ride and only gets better. I would caution you about posting in April 12 - we're a little off center in here 'winker'
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I say congrats on your birthday present to yourself. We got along road ahead of us ,but if we use this site to its full advantage all of us together can get through this road one day at a time.
Heck yeah but we gotta be on one road or another and I'm proud to be on this particular one with you bro- all us Killing the Can types are changing lives and dropping nic bitch to the curb withou mercy! Thanks for being in my journey!
keep documenting your '1st time sans nic' it's a great ride and only gets better. I would caution you about posting in April 12 - we're a little off center in here 'winker'
Thanks for the support! and LOL! I thought that might be my sort of crowd in there!
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Quit date 43, captains log.....
I gotta say i saw in Pinched's intro thread where he had a rough day, and there was this convergence of the all-KTC all-stars squad of quitters (from the time I've been here at least, to allow props for others that have scaled back or "retired" earlier) who gathered around and offerred support/encouragement. That was an amazing show of "quit force" and I was simply impressed by the depth to which we can earn strong people having our backs when we need it around here. Amazing.
I also have some new thoughts to log, and of course symptoms update for myself to see in the future so I damn sure dont put myself through this addiction recovery suck process any more. So I still get headaches, maybe once per day on average. Is it withdrawal/rewiring or some other factor- i don't know. And my head still gets fuzzy at random times. Could it be the new rush of oxygen after 30+ years of enslavement? I don't know. I still get anxiety, frequently, but most of the time that's kind of fun because i'm a bit of an adrenaline junky too so I ride the buzz of it, all natural and no UST poison involved. And road rage-- wow! Today it's snowy and bad traffic here, and I could have tore some stupid mother-f-ers' heads off and pissed and more down their throats if I would have indulged my road rage feelings- scary, gotta get a handle on that one! And, i'm not sleeping well yet. Hard to get to sleep, then I wake at 4 am and stay awake-- about an hour and a half earlier than needed. Is this withdrawal/rewiring still, or other stresses given that I'm having some tough times at home for the past month? I don't know.
So, there are a lot of "I don't know" the real causes of some things that may be continued withdrawal/rewiring symptoms. I am curious, if anyone has opinions, but in the end, I found myself realizing last night that I really don't give a damn what they are from, in a way-- my continuing quit and the nic-bitch's protestations and tricks, or my stressful home life situation. Either way, I am moving my life towards the better and that's what matters. The home life will work itself out however it does, and I will still be quit. Maybe it would have all fallen apart at a different time, or maybe my quitting somehow helped me step into a setting things right mode and hurried it along.Either way, I don't have the added problem of a nicotine addiction and poison slowly killing me in addition to whatever else I am dealing with.
Sure, there have been some tough times to make through in this quit- symptoms and the like, but I'm making it and determined to continue to make it, and i have a much better approach than most due to KTC. So fuck it all, whatever I am dealing wiht is mine to deal with and I know my course is set in a better direction than it has been the entire rest of my adult life. So fuck it all, I"ll deal with it all, and I'm a damn sight better off than I've ever been before, and I'm glad about that. Fuck the nic-bitch, fuck UST, fuck caving, fuck everyone's addiction, I want to beat this addiction out of every where it exists sometimes, including in other people!!! I know I"m still in the early stages of my own quit, so maybe I can't be super-nic-bitch killer yet, but I can be my own nic-bitch killer for now and do that well, and I continue to be up to the task.
I have to say, Pinched's post I mentioned early triggered a lot of this for me, as I realized really deeply, maybe for the first time so deeply, that whatever life deals us, once we are quit at least we don't have the damned nicotine addiction involved to deal with as well. And whatever problems come up, it would be stupid/silly/assenine to think that somehow they created a reason to chew again. Fricking ridiculous! And though kicking the addiction is tough, i am starting to feel some clarity and freedom, and I want SO MUCH MORE of that! I'll continue to earn my freedom day by day, and i'm so thankful for all of you who know about this struggle as well and are on this journey with me.
-
Quit date 43, captains log.....
I gotta say i saw in Pinched's intro thread where he had a rough day, and there was this convergence of the all-KTC all-stars squad of quitters (from the time I've been here at least, to allow props for others that have scaled back or "retired" earlier) who gathered around and offerred support/encouragement. That was an amazing show of "quit force" and I was simply impressed by the depth to which we can earn strong people having our backs when we need it around here. Amazing.
I also have some new thoughts to log, and of course symptoms update for myself to see in the future so I damn sure dont put myself through this addiction recovery suck process any more. So I still get headaches, maybe once per day on average. Is it withdrawal/rewiring or some other factor- i don't know. And my head still gets fuzzy at random times. Could it be the new rush of oxygen after 30+ years of enslavement? I don't know. I still get anxiety, frequently, but most of the time that's kind of fun because i'm a bit of an adrenaline junky too so I ride the buzz of it, all natural and no UST poison involved. And road rage-- wow! Today it's snowy and bad traffic here, and I could have tore some stupid mother-f-ers' heads off and pissed and more down their throats if I would have indulged my road rage feelings- scary, gotta get a handle on that one! And, i'm not sleeping well yet. Hard to get to sleep, then I wake at 4 am and stay awake-- about an hour and a half earlier than needed. Is this withdrawal/rewiring still, or other stresses given that I'm having some tough times at home for the past month? I don't know.
So, there are a lot of "I don't know" the real causes of some things that may be continued withdrawal/rewiring symptoms. I am curious, if anyone has opinions, but in the end, I found myself realizing last night that I really don't give a damn what they are from, in a way-- my continuing quit and the nic-bitch's protestations and tricks, or my stressful home life situation. Either way, I am moving my life towards the better and that's what matters. The home life will work itself out however it does, and I will still be quit. Maybe it would have all fallen apart at a different time, or maybe my quitting somehow helped me step into a setting things right mode and hurried it along.Either way, I don't have the added problem of a nicotine addiction and poison slowly killing me in addition to whatever else I am dealing with.
Sure, there have been some tough times to make through in this quit- symptoms and the like, but I'm making it and determined to continue to make it, and i have a much better approach than most due to KTC. So fuck it all, whatever I am dealing wiht is mine to deal with and I know my course is set in a better direction than it has been the entire rest of my adult life. So fuck it all, I"ll deal with it all, and I'm a damn sight better off than I've ever been before, and I'm glad about that. Fuck the nic-bitch, fuck UST, fuck caving, fuck everyone's addiction, I want to beat this addiction out of every where it exists sometimes, including in other people!!! I know I"m still in the early stages of my own quit, so maybe I can't be super-nic-bitch killer yet, but I can be my own nic-bitch killer for now and do that well, and I continue to be up to the task.
I have to say, Pinched's post I mentioned early triggered a lot of this for me, as I realized really deeply, maybe for the first time so deeply, that whatever life deals us, once we are quit at least we don't have the damned nicotine addiction involved to deal with as well. And whatever problems come up, it would be stupid/silly/assenine to think that somehow they created a reason to chew again. Fricking ridiculous! And though kicking the addiction is tough, i am starting to feel some clarity and freedom, and I want SO MUCH MORE of that! I'll continue to earn my freedom day by day, and i'm so thankful for all of you who know about this struggle as well and are on this journey with me.
Brother I am glad that you read through all that and saw the same exact thing that I did. That kind of outpouring is why I am as active around here. Without some of the veterans here I would have folded my hand a long time ago.
This whole reasoning for accountability is why I also choose to post roll daily with damn near 20 quit groups. Each of those groups has at least one quitter in it that stepped up and either handed me my ass or grabbed my hand to help me.
Unfortunately there has been a lot of other distractions and other quitters sharing their discontent with the veterans, moderators and/or admins. I cannot say that I am 100% in support of every decision made but I can support the fact that a decision was made and followed through on. I post here for my own accountability and in turn I opened myself up let people know who I am and have gained some lifelong friends in the process.
I go back to one quitter in chat that is not the most active guy on here anymore but that Son of a Bitch saved me way early. I had one Keyboard cowboy that had me so mad I threw my mouse across the room because what he said to me hurt deep into the fiber of my being and I know his ass wouldn't have the balls to say that to my face, but this veteran quitter pulled me aside got my phone number and called me to calm me down before the time bomb in my head went off and injured anyone else.
You should also be aware that your posts that dictate the physical and emotional feelings you face daily also help those of us that are a few days ahead of you remember that shitty part, that crappy day or even that great day. All this helps this Brotherhood of quitters static and current.
Great post and thank you for sharing!
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So i just have to vent this...... a newer KTC bro, rdad, shared with me that online I could get a free copy of Freedom from Nicotine by Polito and that it would help me learn about the addiction and the recovery we are all going through.
I got the ebook, read it, and my hatred of nicotine jumped through the roof, blasted off into space! It never really sunk in for me before just how evil the addiction to this particular compound is. For some reason, reading what that book explained in chapter 1 made things so much more clear, and really set me off.
The damned stuff actually takes over our dopamine receptor system! Almost completely! This is a very basic-level system that we need for our own survival and survival of the species. It's extreme hard-wiring. To quote from the book, "Our dopamine pathways are the source of survival instinct anticipation, motivation and reinforcement. Hard-wired instincts include eating food, drinking liquids, accomplishment,companionship, group acceptance, reproduction and child rearing" THESE ARE VERY BASIC THINGS, and the damned drug takes over that pathway and that is what causes us to not be able to quit it without a hell of a fight! This really is about the scariest type of chemical you could put into your body! And that's just the nicotine! Not to mention the other shit, natural and engineered, that's in tobacco! But its the nicotine that makes us into slaves, and that bitch is one nasty, scary, evil piece of hell that I never want anything to do with any more, that I wish somebody would really have helped me understand in my thick head earlier, that the govenment wouldn't have helped support the lies of, and that I am now truly prepared and willing to fight on behalf of all of us innocent humans from now on.
Sheesh! Eating, drinking liquids-- yep, my chew crave was about the same- because nicbitch took over that wiring. And companionship- NO WONDER THE BITCH WAS MY "LITTLE FRIEND" --- she fuckin took over the neural pathways that encourage us to make friends for our own good. "You dont need any more friends, you have me" she whispers "you always have and you always will." That's EXACTLY the impact the addiction taking over the receptor pathways that it does. What the HELL?!?!?!? This is a weed from hell!!
No wonder I eventuall noticed I didn't feel compelled to be very sociable when I was chewing, that it made me withdraw. No wonder so many of us report how we used to value our "alone time" with our lover slut nic bitch! No wonder some of the terms used to describe the addiction, e.g., "sucking poison from the nic-bitch's tit" are really so fitting- the addiction is that deep, that basic, to where it is actually replacing our own SURVIVAL instincts! j
I just had to vent this- i'm sure some of you, if not most, already understood, but it finally just clicked with me, and I"m feeling it very deeplyh now how much of a game of russian roulette with the odds against you any further cave is for anyone who ever gets the balls to quit. It's important that we know how bad this stuff really is, and I keep learning more that blows me away!
Quit on fellow quitters, this is serious business and I am more thankful and proud than ever to be quitting daily with you.
-
So i just have to vent this...... a newer KTC bro, rdad, shared with me that online I could get a free copy of Freedom from Nicotine by Polito and that it would help me learn about the addiction and the recovery we are all going through.
I got the ebook, read it, and my hatred of nicotine jumped through the roof, blasted off into space! It never really sunk in for me before just how evil the addiction to this particular compound is. For some reason, reading what that book explained in chapter 1 made things so much more clear, and really set me off.
The damned stuff actually takes over our dopamine receptor system! Almost completely! This is a very basic-level system that we need for our own survival and survival of the species. It's extreme hard-wiring. To quote from the book, "Our dopamine pathways are the source of survival instinct anticipation, motivation and reinforcement. Hard-wired instincts include eating food, drinking liquids, accomplishment,companionship, group acceptance, reproduction and child rearing" THESE ARE VERY BASIC THINGS, and the damned drug takes over that pathway and that is what causes us to not be able to quit it without a hell of a fight! This really is about the scariest type of chemical you could put into your body! And that's just the nicotine! Not to mention the other shit, natural and engineered, that's in tobacco! But its the nicotine that makes us into slaves, and that bitch is one nasty, scary, evil piece of hell that I never want anything to do with any more, that I wish somebody would really have helped me understand in my thick head earlier, that the govenment wouldn't have helped support the lies of, and that I am now truly prepared and willing to fight on behalf of all of us innocent humans from now on.
Sheesh! Eating, drinking liquids-- yep, my chew crave was about the same- because nicbitch took over that wiring. And companionship- NO WONDER THE BITCH WAS MY "LITTLE FRIEND" --- she fuckin took over the neural pathways that encourage us to make friends for our own good. "You dont need any more friends, you have me" she whispers "you always have and you always will." That's EXACTLY the impact the addiction taking over the receptor pathways that it does. What the HELL?!?!?!? This is a weed from hell!!
No wonder I eventuall noticed I didn't feel compelled to be very sociable when I was chewing, that it made me withdraw. No wonder so many of us report how we used to value our "alone time" with our lover slut nic bitch! No wonder some of the terms used to describe the addiction, e.g., "sucking poison from the nic-bitch's tit" are really so fitting- the addiction is that deep, that basic, to where it is actually replacing our own SURVIVAL instincts! j
I just had to vent this- i'm sure some of you, if not most, already understood, but it finally just clicked with me, and I"m feeling it very deeplyh now how much of a game of russian roulette with the odds against you any further cave is for anyone who ever gets the balls to quit. It's important that we know how bad this stuff really is, and I keep learning more that blows me away!
Quit on fellow quitters, this is serious business and I am more thankful and proud than ever to be quitting daily with you.
Of your up for another read, try "the easy way to quit smoking" by Alan Carr.
It talks about quitting smoking but it's really a brilliant book on lies and falsehoods of nicotine.
It helped my quit a great deal. I still read it.
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I've noticed that the more I read about this site, the addiction, the quit... everything seems to make sense in a way that makes me pissed that I didn't see clearly before I quit... Make sense?
I could see how booze and other drugs could cloud your ability to make judgments. That makes sense. We have all heard from probably Junior High on how drugs affect your decision making.
BUT NEVER DID ANYONE TEACH US NICOTINE COULD DO THAT!!!!
I never - NEVER considered nicotine a drug that interfered with my brain.
In fact - where I grew up, dip (either tins or pouches) was something manly men did. If you couldn't handle Copenhagen, you were a pussy.
Man... thanks for posting that. Good read.
By the way, I'm proud to be quit today with you and the rest of the folks here at KTC who now understand what this shit really does.
Jayhawk.
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It's the fucking lizard-brain part of us, that part of the brain's systems to ensure survival instincts like DRINKING LIQUIDS that nicotine takes over. No damned wonder you gotta quit hard or go home! I'm still reeling!
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Godamn! I love reading this shit from the guys that have been quit longer than me! I am so Fucking pumped up right now to stay quit! The nicotine is a fucking lie shoved in our faces without us knowing how fucking destructive it is to our tissues and our brains. All in the name of keeping us feeding and spending our money, fucking up our families and on and on and on....
I cant remember the me before dipping but I am starting to catch glimpses of him from time to time since my quit and I love it.
Quitting Like Fuck Today with Brettless and Deisel2112
"Proud swagger out of the schoolyard, waiting for the worlds applause..."
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Godamn! I love reading this shit from the guys that have been quit longer than me! I am so Fucking pumped up right now to stay quit! The nicotine is a fucking lie shoved in our faces without us knowing how fucking destructive it is to our tissues and our brains. All in the name of keeping us feeding and spending our money, fucking up our families and on and on and on....
I cant remember the me before dipping but I am starting to catch glimpses of him from time to time since my quit and I love it.
Quitting Like Fuck Today with Brettless and Deisel2112
"Proud swagger out of the schoolyard, waiting for the worlds applause..."
..."rebel without a conscience, martyr without a cause..."
The Pass...a great tune and relatable to this site
Their are many "trembling on a rocky ledge, staring out into a heartless sea..."
Cavers, "set a bad example. Make surrender seem alright, like the act of a noble warrior, who lost the will to FIGHT".
Keep fighting, people.
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Looks like you are beating this thing and taking names, I knew you had it in you.
The loss of temper thing goes away, I was seriously concerned with mine but it's normal now.
From my quit scale: Day 74- 85: Really good days. Strong cravings when I have too many drinks so I have been careful with drinking. Normal days are now 0-1 crave. My temper has been completely under control for 2 weeks now
Everything got way better after that.
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Honestly I have to say I've been feeling a lot of anxiety, and my temper/rage seems to be bad lately. Today I left the house so I won't blow up at the kids. I'm at day 47 and from what I can tell and what some vets are sAying, this is probably part of my recovery.
I found that delving into the site here, my continued addiction, has helped. Today I found a real treasure trove of quit philosophy and insight - and if anyone is a newer quitter in search of some inspiration, check out skoalMonster's intro thread. Not to be missed, and now my quit is stronger.
If I knew how to put. Link to it here I would. Maybe somebody could post one here? Anyway, thanks sM and all the rest who put wisdom in there!
-
Honestly I have to say I've been feeling a lot of anxiety, and my temper/rage seems to be bad lately. Today I left the house so I won't blow up at the kids. I'm at day 47 and from what I can tell and what some vets are sAying, this is probably part of my recovery.
I found that delving into the site here, my continued addiction, has helped. Today I found a real treasure trove of quit philosophy and insight - and if anyone is a newer quitter in search of some inspiration, check out skoalMonster's intro thread. Not to be missed, and now my quit is stronger.
If I knew how to put. Link to it here I would. Maybe somebody could post one here? Anyway, thanks sM and all the rest who put wisdom in there!
SkoalMonster's Intro Thread (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2573&st=0)
If you want to clear some fog or relieve symptoms of suck, take some SM (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?act=Search&CODE=getalluser&mid=6412). Works every time.
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Congrats. Day 50. Petal to the metal on the quit machine.
ThatÂ’s:
- 50 days of freedom
- 50 days of not investing in your own jaw cancer
- 50 days of not looking like a redneck sister/brother fucker who will also dabbles with livestock.
Sorry, I might have gotten a little carried away with that last one.
QLF IÂ’m quit with you.
-
Honestly I have to say I've been feeling a lot of anxiety, and my temper/rage seems to be bad lately. Today I left the house so I won't blow up at the kids. I'm at day 47 and from what I can tell and what some vets are sAying, this is probably part of my recovery.
I found that delving into the site here, my continued addiction, has helped. Today I found a real treasure trove of quit philosophy and insight - and if anyone is a newer quitter in search of some inspiration, check out skoalMonster's intro thread. Not to be missed, and now my quit is stronger.
If I knew how to put. Link to it here I would. Maybe somebody could post one here? Anyway, thanks sM and all the rest who put wisdom in there!
SkoalMonster's Intro Thread (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2573&st=0)
If you want to clear some fog or relieve symptoms of suck, take some SM (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?act=Search&CODE=getalluser&mid=6412). Works every time.
thanks fellas, glad it helps
sm
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is. Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is. Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
keep bringing it every damn day. it's amazing all the freedoms we willingly sacrificed to kneel at her feet. a word to the wise, keep your head on a swivel, as the nic bitch likes to change up the point of attack and her disguise
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is. Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
keep bringing it every damn day. it's amazing all the freedoms we willingly sacrificed to kneel at her feet. a word to the wise, keep your head on a swivel, as the nic bitch likes to change up the point of attack and her disguise
Yes, see how easy life can be when you do not have to worry how to feed an addiction? Well done!
PS
I got stuck in DC once without my can. I was miserable till I got my fix.
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is.  Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
keep bringing it every damn day. it's amazing all the freedoms we willingly sacrificed to kneel at her feet. a word to the wise, keep your head on a swivel, as the nic bitch likes to change up the point of attack and her disguise
Yes, see how easy life can be when you do not have to worry how to feed an addiction? Well done!
PS
I got stuck in DC once without my can. I was miserable till I got my fix.
I hope that at some point in the rewiring process, my neurons rewire themselves so I do a little better job at noticing errors in my typing! hahahaha! Seriously, sometimes when I see what I wrote, like the above, and see all the typos I cringe! oh well, you all take me as I come here, and for some reason it's really as bad typist sometimes! Can't blame autocorrect either, when I'm not on my phone. But I really don't see all the errors the first time! So be it, I know what I'm saying and it does have value when I look back at where I've been. I noticed the typing was bad early on too- attributed it to fog.
Another good point about DC --- ihatecope told me grizzclaws lives over that way, so I got in touch with grizzclaws and we'll do a get together next time I get out. Looking forward to that, as long as he doesn't want to go fishing!
If any newer quitters aren't aware of the meetup topic forums, CBird explained to me that you can track the topics of a meetup in a particular area, and then if someone comes to that area and posts you'll get a notice that someone posted- and perhaps meet face to face. Thanks Cbird!
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is.  Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
keep bringing it every damn day. it's amazing all the freedoms we willingly sacrificed to kneel at her feet. a word to the wise, keep your head on a swivel, as the nic bitch likes to change up the point of attack and her disguise
Yes, see how easy life can be when you do not have to worry how to feed an addiction? Well done!
PS
I got stuck in DC once without my can. I was miserable till I got my fix.
I hope that at some point in the rewiring process, my neurons rewire themselves so I do a little better job at noticing errors in my typing! hahahaha! Seriously, sometimes when I see what I wrote, like the above, and see all the typos I cringe! oh well, you all take me as I come here, and for some reason it's really as bad typist sometimes! Can't blame autocorrect either, when I'm not on my phone. But I really don't see all the errors the first time! So be it, I know what I'm saying and it does have value when I look back at where I've been. I noticed the typing was bad early on too- attributed it to fog.
Another good point about DC --- ihatecope told me grizzclaws lives over that way, so I got in touch with grizzclaws and we'll do a get together next time I get out. Looking forward to that, as long as he doesn't want to go fishing!
If any newer quitters aren't aware of the meetup topic forums, CBird explained to me that you can track the topics of a meetup in a particular area, and then if someone comes to that area and posts you'll get a notice that someone posted- and perhaps meet face to face. Thanks Cbird!
Brett, the Potomac is full of snakeheads. I'll get my brother in law's boat. We're goin fishing. I'll buy the sunflower seeds.
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is.  Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
keep bringing it every damn day. it's amazing all the freedoms we willingly sacrificed to kneel at her feet. a word to the wise, keep your head on a swivel, as the nic bitch likes to change up the point of attack and her disguise
Yes, see how easy life can be when you do not have to worry how to feed an addiction? Well done!
PS
I got stuck in DC once without my can. I was miserable till I got my fix.
I hope that at some point in the rewiring process, my neurons rewire themselves so I do a little better job at noticing errors in my typing! hahahaha! Seriously, sometimes when I see what I wrote, like the above, and see all the typos I cringe! oh well, you all take me as I come here, and for some reason it's really as bad typist sometimes! Can't blame autocorrect either, when I'm not on my phone. But I really don't see all the errors the first time! So be it, I know what I'm saying and it does have value when I look back at where I've been. I noticed the typing was bad early on too- attributed it to fog.
Another good point about DC --- ihatecope told me grizzclaws lives over that way, so I got in touch with grizzclaws and we'll do a get together next time I get out. Looking forward to that, as long as he doesn't want to go fishing!
If any newer quitters aren't aware of the meetup topic forums, CBird explained to me that you can track the topics of a meetup in a particular area, and then if someone comes to that area and posts you'll get a notice that someone posted- and perhaps meet face to face. Thanks Cbird!
Brett, the Potomac is full of snakeheads. I'll get my brother in law's boat. We're goin fishing. I'll buy the sunflower seeds.
Reason to quit number 102: You will make more friends. The nic bitch is selfish she would have us believe that she is our only friend while stabbing us in the back.
LMFAO on the fishing pic. Anyone care to see mike fishing in DC should request a copy of that pic.
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is.  Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
keep bringing it every damn day. it's amazing all the freedoms we willingly sacrificed to kneel at her feet. a word to the wise, keep your head on a swivel, as the nic bitch likes to change up the point of attack and her disguise
Yes, see how easy life can be when you do not have to worry how to feed an addiction? Well done!
PS
I got stuck in DC once without my can. I was miserable till I got my fix.
I hope that at some point in the rewiring process, my neurons rewire themselves so I do a little better job at noticing errors in my typing! hahahaha! Seriously, sometimes when I see what I wrote, like the above, and see all the typos I cringe! oh well, you all take me as I come here, and for some reason it's really as bad typist sometimes! Can't blame autocorrect either, when I'm not on my phone. But I really don't see all the errors the first time! So be it, I know what I'm saying and it does have value when I look back at where I've been. I noticed the typing was bad early on too- attributed it to fog.
Another good point about DC --- ihatecope told me grizzclaws lives over that way, so I got in touch with grizzclaws and we'll do a get together next time I get out. Looking forward to that, as long as he doesn't want to go fishing!
If any newer quitters aren't aware of the meetup topic forums, CBird explained to me that you can track the topics of a meetup in a particular area, and then if someone comes to that area and posts you'll get a notice that someone posted- and perhaps meet face to face. Thanks Cbird!
Brett, the Potomac is full of snakeheads. I'll get my brother in law's boat. We're goin fishing. I'll buy the sunflower seeds.
Reason to quit number 102: You will make more friends. The nic bitch is selfish she would have us believe that she is our only friend while stabbing us in the back.
LMFAO on the fishing pic. Anyone care to see mike fishing in DC should request a copy of that pic.
I could really relate to your travels. I was on the road this week as well.
The one thing to think about is that you are NO LONGER traveling with the nic B. We used to and she used to dictate our entire trip... Tell us what to do the entire time. No more my friend. You are no longer owned.
Every day you post roll and quit is a day the nic B is not controlling your life. You are dictating your actions and are back in control. She is still trying to nudge her way back... But not today!
This road trip for you was your first solo work trip in a while... Well done!
Proud to be quit with you today brother!
-
Seriously, check this out. The stuff is evil. The companies selling it are evil. The family fortunes gained in its trade are evil. The people who get fat off the profits are evil. The govenrment officials who have refused to act against it, as a threat to the lives of everyone and the budget (health care) of the US. are evil.
Original quote from Greg5280 on BeerBottleSpittoon's intro thread. I"m not a quoting or linking ninja yet, but here's my best attempt...
A friend of mine has been going through this process here at Kill the Can and I see that he is on day 131. Congratulations Scooners. Today I join him and begin my first ever Quit in 16 years. It will be a challenge but I will succeed because for the first time ever I want to quit. Until now (and even now) I have loved loved loved chewing. But last night I had my last chew and today I quit.
as of today, you no longer love it. You'll find, perhaps very quickly, that you detest tobacco. Read the site from top to bottom. When you are done, you'll hate tobacco for the rest of your life.
Tarpon is correct. The illusion you made up for yourself is that you liked it. You don't. Step back and look at the habit itself and you will decide it is the most digusting fucking thing you have ever done. I will post an article here that may help you understand.
Understanding your enemy.
**Portions taken from an article on Whyquit.com**
As teenagers, what most of us thought would be a brief rebellious experiment was quickly transformed into a powerful lifelong chemical addiction as daily multiple nicotine feedings quickly became mandatory. New studies confirm that for some of us it only took coughing and hacking our way through a few nicotine laden cigarettes, or a few pinches of tobacco before the shackles of slavery began to take control. Five, ten, fifteen nicotine fixes a day became the norm, our way of life- when will enough be enough became the question. "Tomorrow, tomorrow I will quit” or "I love tobacco, it helps me think" “ “It helps me remain calm”, and many other lies we told ourselves daily. Welcome to the realities of true chemical dependency. A world built upon lies; Lies sold to you by big tobacco and lies you told yourself.
Psychologists calls our lies denial. Denial is an unconscious defense mechanism - just below the surface - we use for resolving the emotional conflict and anxieties that naturally arise from living in a permanent state of self-destructive chemical bondage. Three primary areas of denial relied upon by nicotine addicts are dependency denial, cost denial and recovery denial. In each, truth is sacrificed in exchange for peace of mind while remaining hostage in an artificial world of "nicotine normal," or to justify relapse. I know I told my self hundreds of times I could quit whenever I wanted to, I just did not want to quit. Tobacco kept me calm, helped me concentrate, gave me energy.. what horseshit. I know you all used this one too “ I will quit when Skoal reaches XXX per can I will quit.” All forms of denial to help you cope with your addiction.
Most nicotine addicts are completely insulated by a thick blanket of unconscious denial rationalizations, minimizations, fault projections, escapes, intellectualizations and delusions that hide the pain of captivity or create the illusion that lifes problems are somehow being solved by using. The average addict musters the confidence to challenge their addiction about once every three years, at which time roughly 1 in 20 will succeed in breaking free for an entire year. These horrible recovery statistics evenutally result in half of us dying by our own hand, with male users losing an average of 13 years of life expectancy and females losing 14 years. Our senseless self-destruction is undeniable visible evidence of denial's depth, and the power of this addiction. The addiction insulated us from the extreme price being paid with each and every puff or pinch - a little more of life itself taken, all to line the pockets of big tobacco.
Sadly for far too many the three years between recovery attempts will be too long. According to the World Health Organization the next three years will cost 15 million of our brother and sister addicts their lives. If you are here reading this you are at a crossroads. You want to quit but are not sure you can. This is where you need to be. It will be tough, you will have to endure some pain but it can be done. As a former can to can and a half a day user I can attest to the fact that this site and the methods here do work. You have a choice to make today, another try in three years may be too late.
Make no mistakes, this is a battle for your lives. What will your decision be ?
-
This is just a post for my quit log, for the future me to review and refresh my hate for nicotine addiction. Feel free to move along and help someone in need- i'm doing fine, just logging some things.
Of course if something below helps you, that's great too, help yourself.
I"m getting sick of a narcissistic type or two bumping their drama to the top all the time so i'm a little hesitant to post up and be doing the same--- when there are new quitters in need of support posting all the time, but what the hell this thread is for me and everyone can make their own minds up about narcisists and whether to keep feeding their attention addiction.
Yesterday, day 55 for me, was a real surprise. From out of nowhere I got slammed by a deep fog and terrible headache. It's been a bit of a roller coaster but just fine for several weeks. then BAM! Felt like something out of the deepest fog funk of the first couple of weeks, even like around the 3rd or 4th day of suck.
No way was i tempted to go back. And, I just was glad to get through the day. The fact that I had made it through several of those days in a row made it tolerable. I also reached out in passing and got some great support -- thanks to derk40, Cbird, BigRuss, and StevieG. All stepped up to sympathize/support, and that helped a lot compared to going it alone.
But for drinking this koolaid, all the people who interact with me, and the accountability and support, I would not have have come this far.
Also was reading in AGlawyer's thread a bit about alcohol and caving. Basically, the point was, if you are committed with your entire spirit to quit you will not cave, even if you drink and are tempted. I agree. I think caving without alcohol is even worse, especially if you know better and have the tools like we do here. There are some guys who cave then disappear, and some that cave once or twice then dissappear or flog themselves publicly then disappear. I get that- they aren't ready. But caving when you are full on deep into the site--- now that's scary! And with not even a lame excuse like alcohol, at all-- wow! From this vantage point, all i can say is that I will do my very best not to cave that way. I must keep my web maintained-- that means alive, fresh. No long dissappearances ever! ALso makes me respec the heck, even more, out of the long-term quitters in this web circle here.
-
This is just a post for my quit log, for the future me to review and refresh my hate for nicotine addiction. Feel free to move along and help someone in need- i'm doing fine, just logging some things.
Of course is something below helps you, that's great too, help yourself.
I"m getting sick of a narcissistic type or two bumping their drama to the top all the time so i'm a little hesitant to post up and be doing the same--- when there are new quitters in need of support posting all the time, but what the hell this thread is for me and everyone can make their own minds up about narcisists and whether to keep feeding their attention addiction.
Yesterday, day 55 for me, was a real surprise. From out of nowhere I got slammed by a deep fog and terrible headache. It's been a bit of a roller coaster but just fine for several weeks. then BAM! Felt like something out of the deepest fog funk of the first couple of weeks, even like around the 3rd or 4th day of suck.
No way was i tempted to go back. And, I just was glad to get through the day. The fact that I had made it through several of those days in a row made it tolerable. I also reached out in passing and got some great support -- thanks to derk40, Cbird, BigRuss, and StevieG. All stepped up to sympathize/support, and that helped a lot compared to going it alone.
But for drinking this koolaid, all the people who interact with me, and the accountability and support, I would have have come this far.
Also was reading in AGlawyer's thread a bit about alcohol and caving. Basically, the point was, if you are committed with your entire spirit to quit you will not cave, even if you drink and are tempted. I agree. I think caving without alcohol is even worse, especially if you know better and have the tools like we do here. There are some guys who cave then disappear, and some that cave once or twice then dissappear or flog themselves publicly then disappear. I get that- they aren't ready. But caving when you are full on deep into the site--- now that's scary! And with not even a lame excuse like alcohol, at all-- wow! From this vantage point, all i can say is that I will do my very best not to cave that way. I must keep my web maintained-- that means alive, fresh. No long dissappearances ever! ALso makes me respec the heck, even more, out of the long-term quitters in this web circle. here.
I know this is just a logbook entry, but for me it is much more than that! This should be at the top of the intros for all to read brother.
You did exactly what you should have done yesterday to keep yourself quit. 55 days in and You felt a bit sideways. What did you do? You reached out to the support net on this site.
That is textbook.
Look at the recent cavers... No brotherhood and no accountability. Trying to tackle issues by themselves and not reaching out for support when they really need it.
As a whole we are strong. This brotherhood thing is no BS. Anyone on here that is worth a damn will do anything to help you stay quit. Venture out on your own and you may lose the quit that you fought so hard for.
Well done sir. Well done! QLF today!
-
This is just a post for my quit log, for the future me to review and refresh my hate for nicotine addiction. Feel free to move along and help someone in need- i'm doing fine, just logging some things.
Of course is something below helps you, that's great too, help yourself.Â
I"m getting sick of a narcissistic type or two bumping their drama to the top all the time so i'm a little hesitant to post up and be doing the same--- when there are new quitters in need of support posting all the time, but what the hell this thread is for me and everyone can make their own minds up about narcisists and whether to keep feeding their attention addiction.Â
Yesterday, day 55 for me, was a real surprise. From out of nowhere I got slammed by a deep fog and terrible headache. It's been a bit of a roller coaster but just fine for several weeks. then BAM! Felt like something out of the deepest fog funk of the first couple of weeks, even like around the 3rd or 4th day of suck.
No way was i tempted to go back. And, I just was glad to get through the day. The fact that I had made it through several of those days in a row made it tolerable. I also reached out in passing and got some great support -- thanks to derk40, Cbird, BigRuss, and StevieG. All stepped up to sympathize/support, and that helped a lot compared to going it alone.
But for drinking this koolaid, all the people who interact with me, and the accountability and support, I would have have come this far.
Also was reading in AGlawyer's thread a bit about alcohol and caving. Basically, the point was, if you are committed with your entire spirit to quit you will not cave, even if you drink and are tempted. I agree. I think caving without alcohol is even worse, especially if you know better and have the tools like we do here. There are some guys who cave then disappear, and some that cave once or twice then dissappear or flog themselves publicly then disappear. I get that- they aren't ready. But caving when you are full on deep into the site--- now that's scary! And with not even a lame excuse like alcohol, at all-- wow! From this vantage point, all i can say is that I will do my very best not to cave that way. I must keep my web maintained-- that means alive, fresh. No long dissappearances ever! ALso makes me respec the heck, even more, out of the long-term quitters in this web circle. here.
I know this is just a logbook entry, but for me it is much more than that! This should be at the top of the intros for all to read brother.
You did exactly what you should have done yesterday to keep yourself quit. 55 days in and You felt a bit sideways. What did you do? You reached out to the support net on this site.
That is textbook.
Look at the recent cavers... No brotherhood and no accountability. Trying to tackle issues by themselves and not reaching out for support when they really need it.
As a whole we are strong. This brotherhood thing is no BS. Anyone on here that is worth a damn will do anything to help you stay quit. Venture out on your own and you may lose the quit that you fought so hard for.
Well done sir. Well done! QLF today!
Brett,
Brother Derk has done a great job in responding to this and you have done a great job of opening up.
Now I hope that we can make today a little more epic for your quit. I am in your town currently and I hope we can meet over a beer or something as I know for a fact that meeting a fellow quitter face to face adds a ton of accountability.
Quit on today like a complete badass, text or call me later and we can plan.
Pinched
-
This is just a post for my quit log, for the future me to review and refresh my hate for nicotine addiction. Feel free to move along and help someone in need- i'm doing fine, just logging some things.
Of course is something below helps you, that's great too, help yourself.Â
I"m getting sick of a narcissistic type or two bumping their drama to the top all the time so i'm a little hesitant to post up and be doing the same--- when there are new quitters in need of support posting all the time, but what the hell this thread is for me and everyone can make their own minds up about narcisists and whether to keep feeding their attention addiction.Â
Yesterday, day 55 for me, was a real surprise. From out of nowhere I got slammed by a deep fog and terrible headache. It's been a bit of a roller coaster but just fine for several weeks. then BAM! Felt like something out of the deepest fog funk of the first couple of weeks, even like around the 3rd or 4th day of suck.
No way was i tempted to go back. And, I just was glad to get through the day. The fact that I had made it through several of those days in a row made it tolerable. I also reached out in passing and got some great support -- thanks to derk40, Cbird, BigRuss, and StevieG. All stepped up to sympathize/support, and that helped a lot compared to going it alone.
But for drinking this koolaid, all the people who interact with me, and the accountability and support, I would have have come this far.
Also was reading in AGlawyer's thread a bit about alcohol and caving. Basically, the point was, if you are committed with your entire spirit to quit you will not cave, even if you drink and are tempted. I agree. I think caving without alcohol is even worse, especially if you know better and have the tools like we do here. There are some guys who cave then disappear, and some that cave once or twice then dissappear or flog themselves publicly then disappear. I get that- they aren't ready. But caving when you are full on deep into the site--- now that's scary! And with not even a lame excuse like alcohol, at all-- wow! From this vantage point, all i can say is that I will do my very best not to cave that way. I must keep my web maintained-- that means alive, fresh. No long dissappearances ever! ALso makes me respec the heck, even more, out of the long-term quitters in this web circle. here.
I know this is just a logbook entry, but for me it is much more than that! This should be at the top of the intros for all to read brother.
You did exactly what you should have done yesterday to keep yourself quit. 55 days in and You felt a bit sideways. What did you do? You reached out to the support net on this site.
That is textbook.
Look at the recent cavers... No brotherhood and no accountability. Trying to tackle issues by themselves and not reaching out for support when they really need it.
As a whole we are strong. This brotherhood thing is no BS. Anyone on here that is worth a damn will do anything to help you stay quit. Venture out on your own and you may lose the quit that you fought so hard for.
Well done sir. Well done! QLF today!
Brett,
Brother Derk has done a great job in responding to this and you have done a great job of opening up.
Now I hope that we can make today a little more epic for your quit. I am in your town currently and I hope we can meet over a beer or something as I know for a fact that meeting a fellow quitter face to face adds a ton of accountability.
Quit on today like a complete badass, text or call me later and we can plan.
Pinched
I love reading this type of shit- young quitters getting what the site is truly about and what it means to really go balls deep and own your quit.
I hope you take Pinched up on his offer- it will help you down the road.
I know you are a student of the site but keep in mind you have a few more funks coming your way; stay prepared and you will weather them just fine!
-
Brett,
Well brother you are a truly awesome individual. Loved getting to know you more plus let's be honest the Cherry Crickets makes for a really cool place to meet anyone much less a fellow quitter. Hey boys this man gets it. He is a determined quitter and although we walked different paths in life we are similar men. I respect you very much and I am glad that we got to put face to the screen names.
I cannot wait to see you board this train and help mix the KTC kool aide.
-
This is just a post for my quit log, for the future me to review and refresh my hate for nicotine addiction. Feel free to move along and help someone in need- i'm doing fine, just logging some things.
Of course is something below helps you, that's great too, help yourself.Â
I"m getting sick of a narcissistic type or two bumping their drama to the top all the time so i'm a little hesitant to post up and be doing the same--- when there are new quitters in need of support posting all the time, but what the hell this thread is for me and everyone can make their own minds up about narcisists and whether to keep feeding their attention addiction.Â
Yesterday, day 55 for me, was a real surprise. From out of nowhere I got slammed by a deep fog and terrible headache. It's been a bit of a roller coaster but just fine for several weeks. then BAM! Felt like something out of the deepest fog funk of the first couple of weeks, even like around the 3rd or 4th day of suck.
No way was i tempted to go back. And, I just was glad to get through the day. The fact that I had made it through several of those days in a row made it tolerable. I also reached out in passing and got some great support -- thanks to derk40, Cbird, BigRuss, and StevieG. All stepped up to sympathize/support, and that helped a lot compared to going it alone.
But for drinking this koolaid, all the people who interact with me, and the accountability and support, I would have have come this far.
Also was reading in AGlawyer's thread a bit about alcohol and caving. Basically, the point was, if you are committed with your entire spirit to quit you will not cave, even if you drink and are tempted. I agree. I think caving without alcohol is even worse, especially if you know better and have the tools like we do here. There are some guys who cave then disappear, and some that cave once or twice then dissappear or flog themselves publicly then disappear. I get that- they aren't ready. But caving when you are full on deep into the site--- now that's scary! And with not even a lame excuse like alcohol, at all-- wow! From this vantage point, all i can say is that I will do my very best not to cave that way. I must keep my web maintained-- that means alive, fresh. No long dissappearances ever! ALso makes me respec the heck, even more, out of the long-term quitters in this web circle. here.
I know this is just a logbook entry, but for me it is much more than that! This should be at the top of the intros for all to read brother.
You did exactly what you should have done yesterday to keep yourself quit. 55 days in and You felt a bit sideways. What did you do? You reached out to the support net on this site.
That is textbook.
Look at the recent cavers... No brotherhood and no accountability. Trying to tackle issues by themselves and not reaching out for support when they really need it.
As a whole we are strong. This brotherhood thing is no BS. Anyone on here that is worth a damn will do anything to help you stay quit. Venture out on your own and you may lose the quit that you fought so hard for.
Well done sir. Well done! QLF today!
Brett,
Brother Derk has done a great job in responding to this and you have done a great job of opening up.
Now I hope that we can make today a little more epic for your quit. I am in your town currently and I hope we can meet over a beer or something as I know for a fact that meeting a fellow quitter face to face adds a ton of accountability.
Quit on today like a complete badass, text or call me later and we can plan.
Pinched
I love reading this type of shit- young quitters getting what the site is truly about and what it means to really go balls deep and own your quit.
I hope you take Pinched up on his offer- it will help you down the road.
I know you are a student of the site but keep in mind you have a few more funks coming your way; stay prepared and you will weather them just fine!
Your intro thread is your journal Brett. Don't feel bad about posting here ever. Post every day if you feel the need; more than once a day even. It is a tool for you to record your quit or to vent for your future benefit and/or for others. You just keep doing what got you here.
As far as the drama on KTC: take what you want from it... Some of this stuff is super emotional, and some is contrived. It hurts like hell investing in people and then either being let down, or letting others who are invested in you down. Bottom line is we are all human addicts and sometimes there is drama. If there was no drama ever KTC would not work. Sometimes the drama is real.
Keep quit brother; if Pinched says you are the real deal, then that is good enough for me. Remember to keep using your intro.
-
This is just a post for my quit log, for the future me to review and refresh my hate for nicotine addiction. Feel free to move along and help someone in need- i'm doing fine, just logging some things.
Of course is something below helps you, that's great too, help yourself.Â
I"m getting sick of a narcissistic type or two bumping their drama to the top all the time so i'm a little hesitant to post up and be doing the same--- when there are new quitters in need of support posting all the time, but what the hell this thread is for me and everyone can make their own minds up about narcisists and whether to keep feeding their attention addiction.Â
Yesterday, day 55 for me, was a real surprise. From out of nowhere I got slammed by a deep fog and terrible headache. It's been a bit of a roller coaster but just fine for several weeks. then BAM! Felt like something out of the deepest fog funk of the first couple of weeks, even like around the 3rd or 4th day of suck.
No way was i tempted to go back. And, I just was glad to get through the day. The fact that I had made it through several of those days in a row made it tolerable. I also reached out in passing and got some great support -- thanks to derk40, Cbird, BigRuss, and StevieG. All stepped up to sympathize/support, and that helped a lot compared to going it alone.
But for drinking this koolaid, all the people who interact with me, and the accountability and support, I would have have come this far.
Also was reading in AGlawyer's thread a bit about alcohol and caving. Basically, the point was, if you are committed with your entire spirit to quit you will not cave, even if you drink and are tempted. I agree. I think caving without alcohol is even worse, especially if you know better and have the tools like we do here. There are some guys who cave then disappear, and some that cave once or twice then dissappear or flog themselves publicly then disappear. I get that- they aren't ready. But caving when you are full on deep into the site--- now that's scary! And with not even a lame excuse like alcohol, at all-- wow! From this vantage point, all i can say is that I will do my very best not to cave that way. I must keep my web maintained-- that means alive, fresh. No long dissappearances ever! ALso makes me respec the heck, even more, out of the long-term quitters in this web circle. here.
I know this is just a logbook entry, but for me it is much more than that! This should be at the top of the intros for all to read brother.
You did exactly what you should have done yesterday to keep yourself quit. 55 days in and You felt a bit sideways. What did you do? You reached out to the support net on this site.
That is textbook.
Look at the recent cavers... No brotherhood and no accountability. Trying to tackle issues by themselves and not reaching out for support when they really need it.
As a whole we are strong. This brotherhood thing is no BS. Anyone on here that is worth a damn will do anything to help you stay quit. Venture out on your own and you may lose the quit that you fought so hard for.
Well done sir. Well done! QLF today!
Brett,
Brother Derk has done a great job in responding to this and you have done a great job of opening up.
Now I hope that we can make today a little more epic for your quit. I am in your town currently and I hope we can meet over a beer or something as I know for a fact that meeting a fellow quitter face to face adds a ton of accountability.
Quit on today like a complete badass, text or call me later and we can plan.
Pinched
I love reading this type of shit- young quitters getting what the site is truly about and what it means to really go balls deep and own your quit.
I hope you take Pinched up on his offer- it will help you down the road.
I know you are a student of the site but keep in mind you have a few more funks coming your way; stay prepared and you will weather them just fine!
Your intro thread is your journal Brett. Don't feel bad about posting here ever. Post every day if you feel the need; more than once a day even. It is a tool for you to record your quit or to vent for your future benefit and/or for others. You just keep doing what got you here.
As far as the drama on KTC: take what you want from it... Some of this stuff is super emotional, and some is contrived. It hurts like hell investing in people and then either being let down, or letting others who are invested in you down. Bottom line is we are all human addicts and sometimes there is drama. If there was no drama ever KTC would not work. Sometimes the drama is real.
Keep quit brother; if Pinched says you are the real deal, then that is good enough for me. Remember to keep using your intro.
been waiting for some words to take shape to express my reaction to this nest of support. The words aren't really coming too much- mostly I'm humbled and I sincerley appreciate the support of you badass quitters. It makes all the difference in the world to have the support, and accountability to others. The more you get to know me the deeper you could jump in my face and more if i were to cave. And that's exactly what I need. And I'll do the same for you. This brotherhood thing is becoming more clear to me all the time.
Oh, in case anyone is wondering, that's definitely not Pinched in his avatar. I was hoping.... but no. I'll take his bad ass self as a bro over any pretty, fluffy piece of eye candy any day though.
-
This is just a post for my quit log, for the future me to review and refresh my hate for nicotine addiction. Feel free to move along and help someone in need- i'm doing fine, just logging some things.
Of course is something below helps you, that's great too, help yourself.Â
I"m getting sick of a narcissistic type or two bumping their drama to the top all the time so i'm a little hesitant to post up and be doing the same--- when there are new quitters in need of support posting all the time, but what the hell this thread is for me and everyone can make their own minds up about narcisists and whether to keep feeding their attention addiction.Â
Yesterday, day 55 for me, was a real surprise. From out of nowhere I got slammed by a deep fog and terrible headache. It's been a bit of a roller coaster but just fine for several weeks. then BAM! Felt like something out of the deepest fog funk of the first couple of weeks, even like around the 3rd or 4th day of suck.
No way was i tempted to go back. And, I just was glad to get through the day. The fact that I had made it through several of those days in a row made it tolerable. I also reached out in passing and got some great support -- thanks to derk40, Cbird, BigRuss, and StevieG. All stepped up to sympathize/support, and that helped a lot compared to going it alone.
But for drinking this koolaid, all the people who interact with me, and the accountability and support, I would have have come this far.
Also was reading in AGlawyer's thread a bit about alcohol and caving. Basically, the point was, if you are committed with your entire spirit to quit you will not cave, even if you drink and are tempted. I agree. I think caving without alcohol is even worse, especially if you know better and have the tools like we do here. There are some guys who cave then disappear, and some that cave once or twice then dissappear or flog themselves publicly then disappear. I get that- they aren't ready. But caving when you are full on deep into the site--- now that's scary! And with not even a lame excuse like alcohol, at all-- wow! From this vantage point, all i can say is that I will do my very best not to cave that way. I must keep my web maintained-- that means alive, fresh. No long dissappearances ever! ALso makes me respec the heck, even more, out of the long-term quitters in this web circle. here.
I know this is just a logbook entry, but for me it is much more than that! This should be at the top of the intros for all to read brother.
You did exactly what you should have done yesterday to keep yourself quit. 55 days in and You felt a bit sideways. What did you do? You reached out to the support net on this site.
That is textbook.
Look at the recent cavers... No brotherhood and no accountability. Trying to tackle issues by themselves and not reaching out for support when they really need it.
As a whole we are strong. This brotherhood thing is no BS. Anyone on here that is worth a damn will do anything to help you stay quit. Venture out on your own and you may lose the quit that you fought so hard for.
Well done sir. Well done! QLF today!
Brett,
Brother Derk has done a great job in responding to this and you have done a great job of opening up.
Now I hope that we can make today a little more epic for your quit. I am in your town currently and I hope we can meet over a beer or something as I know for a fact that meeting a fellow quitter face to face adds a ton of accountability.
Quit on today like a complete badass, text or call me later and we can plan.
Pinched
I love reading this type of shit- young quitters getting what the site is truly about and what it means to really go balls deep and own your quit.
I hope you take Pinched up on his offer- it will help you down the road.
I know you are a student of the site but keep in mind you have a few more funks coming your way; stay prepared and you will weather them just fine!
Your intro thread is your journal Brett. Don't feel bad about posting here ever. Post every day if you feel the need; more than once a day even. It is a tool for you to record your quit or to vent for your future benefit and/or for others. You just keep doing what got you here.
As far as the drama on KTC: take what you want from it... Some of this stuff is super emotional, and some is contrived. It hurts like hell investing in people and then either being let down, or letting others who are invested in you down. Bottom line is we are all human addicts and sometimes there is drama. If there was no drama ever KTC would not work. Sometimes the drama is real.
Keep quit brother; if Pinched says you are the real deal, then that is good enough for me. Remember to keep using your intro.
been waiting for some words to take shape to express my reaction to this nest of support. The words aren't really coming too much- mostly I'm humbled and I sincerley appreciate the support of you badass quitters. It makes all the difference in the world to have the support, and accountability to others. The more you get to know me the deeper you could jump in my face and more if i were to cave. And that's exactly what I need. And I'll do the same for you. This brotherhood thing is becoming more clear to me all the time.
Oh, in case anyone is wondering, that's definitely not Pinched in his avatar. I was hoping.... but no. I'll take his bad ass self as a bro over any pretty, fluffy piece of eye candy any day though.
So you're ghey. That's cool, we are accepting of all kinds here, as long as your quit.
Merry Christmas, Sailor. Hopefully you find him under your tree this year...
:channing:
-
This is just a post for my quit log, for the future me to review and refresh my hate for nicotine addiction. Feel free to move along and help someone in need- i'm doing fine, just logging some things.
Of course is something below helps you, that's great too, help yourself.Â
I"m getting sick of a narcissistic type or two bumping their drama to the top all the time so i'm a little hesitant to post up and be doing the same--- when there are new quitters in need of support posting all the time, but what the hell this thread is for me and everyone can make their own minds up about narcisists and whether to keep feeding their attention addiction.Â
Yesterday, day 55 for me, was a real surprise. From out of nowhere I got slammed by a deep fog and terrible headache. It's been a bit of a roller coaster but just fine for several weeks. then BAM! Felt like something out of the deepest fog funk of the first couple of weeks, even like around the 3rd or 4th day of suck.
No way was i tempted to go back. And, I just was glad to get through the day. The fact that I had made it through several of those days in a row made it tolerable. I also reached out in passing and got some great support -- thanks to derk40, Cbird, BigRuss, and StevieG. All stepped up to sympathize/support, and that helped a lot compared to going it alone.
But for drinking this koolaid, all the people who interact with me, and the accountability and support, I would have have come this far.
Also was reading in AGlawyer's thread a bit about alcohol and caving. Basically, the point was, if you are committed with your entire spirit to quit you will not cave, even if you drink and are tempted. I agree. I think caving without alcohol is even worse, especially if you know better and have the tools like we do here. There are some guys who cave then disappear, and some that cave once or twice then dissappear or flog themselves publicly then disappear. I get that- they aren't ready. But caving when you are full on deep into the site--- now that's scary! And with not even a lame excuse like alcohol, at all-- wow! From this vantage point, all i can say is that I will do my very best not to cave that way. I must keep my web maintained-- that means alive, fresh. No long dissappearances ever! ALso makes me respec the heck, even more, out of the long-term quitters in this web circle. here.
I know this is just a logbook entry, but for me it is much more than that! This should be at the top of the intros for all to read brother.
You did exactly what you should have done yesterday to keep yourself quit. 55 days in and You felt a bit sideways. What did you do? You reached out to the support net on this site.
That is textbook.
Look at the recent cavers... No brotherhood and no accountability. Trying to tackle issues by themselves and not reaching out for support when they really need it.
As a whole we are strong. This brotherhood thing is no BS. Anyone on here that is worth a damn will do anything to help you stay quit. Venture out on your own and you may lose the quit that you fought so hard for.
Well done sir. Well done! QLF today!
Brett,
Brother Derk has done a great job in responding to this and you have done a great job of opening up.
Now I hope that we can make today a little more epic for your quit. I am in your town currently and I hope we can meet over a beer or something as I know for a fact that meeting a fellow quitter face to face adds a ton of accountability.
Quit on today like a complete badass, text or call me later and we can plan.
Pinched
I love reading this type of shit- young quitters getting what the site is truly about and what it means to really go balls deep and own your quit.
I hope you take Pinched up on his offer- it will help you down the road.
I know you are a student of the site but keep in mind you have a few more funks coming your way; stay prepared and you will weather them just fine!
Your intro thread is your journal Brett. Don't feel bad about posting here ever. Post every day if you feel the need; more than once a day even. It is a tool for you to record your quit or to vent for your future benefit and/or for others. You just keep doing what got you here.
As far as the drama on KTC: take what you want from it... Some of this stuff is super emotional, and some is contrived. It hurts like hell investing in people and then either being let down, or letting others who are invested in you down. Bottom line is we are all human addicts and sometimes there is drama. If there was no drama ever KTC would not work. Sometimes the drama is real.
Keep quit brother; if Pinched says you are the real deal, then that is good enough for me. Remember to keep using your intro.
been waiting for some words to take shape to express my reaction to this nest of support. The words aren't really coming too much- mostly I'm humbled and I sincerley appreciate the support of you badass quitters. It makes all the difference in the world to have the support, and accountability to others. The more you get to know me the deeper you could jump in my face and more if i were to cave. And that's exactly what I need. And I'll do the same for you. This brotherhood thing is becoming more clear to me all the time.
Oh, in case anyone is wondering, that's definitely not Pinched in his avatar. I was hoping.... but no. I'll take his bad ass self as a bro over any pretty, fluffy piece of eye candy any day though.
So you're ghey. That's cool, we are accepting of all kinds here, as long as your quit.
Merry Christmas, Sailor. Hopefully you find him under your tree this year...
:channing:
um.... I'm not the one with that sort of pic on hand. Just sayin! Keep him under your "tree" bro.
-
Just logging details from my quit, no support needed here, I'm doing fine and know how to reach out when I do need it - instead, help one of the flood of new quitters showing up with new years resolutions instead! this is just for my records..... And new quitters, feel free to look around, I've logged details of my quit in order to help remember what I don't want to have to go through ever again- that's part of the kool-aid around here.
Quit Log - Day 72. I have really been enjoying some nice days in the quit. No terrible symptoms since last posted. Things that linger include: 1) Anger at times, below the surface but eager to come up, and 2) cravings.
As for the anger, it is really strong if i indulge it. Others, especially Paradigm Dawg, say they had it bad and it went away. I''m hoping for that, plus doing some mindfulness work to get behind the anger and why its so bad (I think it has to do with the deep level addiction drive, not just withdrawal- the reasons why i can be addicted to anything, not just nic, in empty spot inside that we try to medicate with addictive things). I also find that exercise is great for keeping the edge of the anger weak or dull compared to how it can be otherwise. Been lifting, doing some cardio, and finding yoga especially helpful a lot of times. I going though home issues as well, so the anger is surely related to that too. It's just an ongoing issue I want to get a better handle on, so logging it here as a record.
Now, for the craves. They are still pretty common every day. I dipped for thousands of days, so its no surprise i'm still conditioned to have crave messages popping up all the time. Lately, i'm recognizing that there seems to be two types of craves. The first is nicotine specific, chew specific. I still recognize it as a little hit of "i need a chew" in my mind and body. It feels like it orginates in the body, as a deep awareness of emptyness somewhere in the guts. But strangely deeper than the guts too. Makes me thing it really originates in the brain, deep, deep back. The emptiness sort of bubbles up from deep, and sometimes i'm still aware of my gums/lips in the places where i used to pack the dips when these cravings hit. The gum/lip awareness is something between tingly and empty feeling.
The second sort of crave i'm noticing is a more general crave, not nicotine specific. It is more of an "I want" feeling without really wanting anything in detail. It feels like its from the guts too, but not as habitual and more emotionall driven. And in a different place in the same region of the body. Strange to say, but it also "feels" "older"- whatever that means. I"m aware that I used to satisfy this one with chew too. I think it may be the addict crave, versus the specifically nic addict crave. It might be the one that led me to chew, while the other one was the sort of crave created by the addiction. This second crave is one i want to get behind some more so i'll put some attention on it when I have them and see what i can figure out.
Ok, that's it for the log. Several guys have warned me of the 70's funk, which I don't think i've had (yet). I have up and down days, even hours, and the symptoms described above, but no deep funk. Sleep has been a little better but i think i'll try some melatonin as suggested by a couple of guys, at some point soon.
-
Day 78
I've been going through some sh*t for a while, as some here know. Some of it's led to some realizations about my quit, that I want to record here. As for the stuff i've been wading through, it's tough to put it here but I will because i think isolation is part of the disease of addiction, and i want to battle that. Plus, maybe this will help someone else get through their own tough spots. It sure helped me to find out you all were here and getting through I thought for years I dealt with alone. So there's real value in terms of openness and it's part of how i'm trying to approach this thing. This will be a longer post, so I"m going to just post my realizations here early, to save anyone reading from going further to get to the point...
1. At this point in my quit, I"m totally unafraid of craves, etc. I"ve been tested. But i am not being cocky. Like a quit mentor here suggested to me, I"ve practiced using the tools here to help me. But the danger of the addiction has not gone away, and it never will. Around this time in a quit, it seems that the real ongoing danger comes to the fore-- that danger is complacency. I see it. I can see now why daily role posting is critical. I've seen failures on the site here, i know my own failed quits in the past, i read about other failed quits from the site. I konw more caves will come to our little brotherhood, and I know it's a game of russian roullette for me if I were ever to decide to fall off this program here and stop posting. I am determined to remain here. I'm inspired by some of the quitters here, and uplifted by many of you.
2. I am increasingly developing a belief that once you start to clean up a major messy area of your life, like dipping and addiciton for so many of us, other things can potentially start to clean up too- in some sort of connection. If you're a Christian, maybe "the Lord starts working in mysterious ways" or if you are buddhist maybe Kharma goes about making other changes in your life when you start to clean it up. Change is not always, and arguably never, comfortable when we go through it. Otherwise we would have chosen the change long ago. But it sure does seem that when it rains it pours, many times, and i can't help but think there must be a connection.
3. I am absolutely committed to fighting what this drug does to us humans. It's ridiculous that it is allowed to be sold so easily, and perpetuated ignorance, that is only meant to benefit big tobacco, is allowed to continue in our society. This stuff is as bad of a drug, this addiction is as bad, as can be imagined! It is so harmful, and so addictive, and effects us all in so many ways. I will fight it. The fight is in the streets-- it's one by one, helping those who are strong enough to do it with support. It is also in education- and I'm constantly talking to people about just how terribly addictive this stuff is. I intend to continue to learn, from some fine examples here, how I can become my own advocate for quit, especially once I have a little time more under my own quit belt. The intention and commitment is already there though.
Ok, those are the insights. Here's where I've been lately. In November I posted about some frustrations I was having at home- my live-in partner, common law wife, had been doing some financial misdeeds that were a betrayal to me and busted my credit up pretty bad, not to mention racked up some debt. Alll sorts of trigger times, but not anything I couldn't handle with some visits back here, texts with quit bros, etc. Emotionally, however, I was feeling betrayed and trying to sort through whether I could learn to trust her again, etc. and dealing with the pending end of the relationship.
That sort of uncomfortable silence and delicate balance remained, as she and the kids needed to stay in the house as well as me. The took a couple of trips around the holiday times, fincanced by her family members pitching in. We weren't talking much though, outside of what was needed to function.
In her text to me about when she was coming home from the Christmas/New Years visit to her childhood home they made, she also told me she wanted talk about some heavy stuff with me. Being pretty excitable, of course that was a little nerve wracking for me, and gave me craves/triggers, but they weren't a problem, I am used to handling them now and i'm committed above all else to being quit.
When we had the talk, the next bomb came. She has been diagnosed with cervical cancer. WTF?!?!? it sucks. I was shook up for a few days, as this was about all I could handle emotionally. I sought out a therapist to help me with anger at the surface before, then this Monday went into his office and bawled my eyes out with all the emotion and jumbled up mess of conflicting feelings about her, myself, everything. Let me put a plug in here for therapy, it can really help and i'm not ever ashamed to say I used it in my life when needed. Just like having a physical injury sometimes we need a doc and/or PT, same is true for emotions- we can get injured and need help getting back on track.
Well this story above created what has to be the most intense, confusing, and hard, sucky period of my life so far, including a pretty messed up childhood at times. This is relevant to my quit because it was so intense. This woulld have broken me before. I would be chewing a can or two per day through this, when I was a 2-3 cans per week chewer normally. And I do get some hard craves, the "habitual" sort of ones i described in an earlier post to myself. But make no mistake, I am not tempted at all to chew or get any other access to nicotine. When the craves hit, they just remind me how much I hate nicotine. Then I'm sort of thankful for them for doing that. No temptation whatsoever from a crave, and this could go on forever as far as I can see. The issue that remains though, is really clear- at this point, complacency is the danger. As i read stories of caves on the site here, that seems to be the common thread too. I am now wary as heck against complacency, and committed to not let it happen in me.
These things in my domestic relationship are really hard to sort out. I do see a common thread of cleaning up, bringing to light things that were already there, but hidden. This sort of seems like a ripple effect of my decision to quit my ninja dipping and come to terms with an addiction that was never understood or admitted to before. All these other things that have been going on in my home involve something coming to light, that was not in the light before. Each of them would be worse if it continued in the darkness. So, if and when I can remove myself from the varous hurts and fears, etc involved, I can always find at least some gratitude that it came to light rather than continue to fester.
I recognize all sorts of spiritual and religious perspectives, and it seems like quite a few of them would point to the evil of the nicotine, and the other problems that were under the surface in my life, as being of a kindred sort. That is why I am committed to becoming a warrior against the nic bitch.
My life is in a transition in many levels right now, and I will have some more tough times to get through as it all sorts out, and i can't know much about how a lot of it will work out in the end. I pray so much for my partner's health to get better, and ask for your prayers for the same, however you pray. I hope for the best for both of us to result from the tension in our relationship from her own shopping addiction that led to the credit mess and deceit. All these events in her life seem to have given her a new and better perspective than I have seen in a long time from her, and i'm grateful for that. I will sort though and survive the credit issues, although I'm not certain of how long etc that will take- i'm just confident that it'll work out with some effort. The one thing I do know is that I don't want any damned poison weed in my mouth.
I would have had to break the "quit" so many times before through all this. Now I'm not tempted. I get headaches, funks, huge stress, anxiety, and all other sorts of feelings were triggers before. Some of them still are, and I have to smack the bitch down as she whispers in my ear or does other stuff that'd make some of you more ghey guys jealous, but she ain't getting anywhere with me, I"m just not interested in any way. Like I said, complacency is my danger now, and my plan for that is to follow the method that works here. I am so thankful for the fact that despite all this am am still quit and clearly planning to stay that way.
Final bonus- bulding my accountabilty network has also given me some great bros who I can reach out to when the times get tough besides addiction, and that is something that I always wanted more of. In an earlier post, I mentioned how I think the poison even isolated me in that way over the years too. Thanks KTC!
-
Day 78
I've been going through some sh*t for a while, as some here know. Some of it's led to some realizations about my quit, that I want to record here. As for the stuff i've been wading through, it's tough to put it here but I will because i think isolation is part of the disease of addiction, and i want to battle that. Plus, maybe this will help someone else get through their own tough spots. It sure helped me to find out you all were here and getting through I thought for years I dealt with alone. So there's real value in terms of openness and it's part of how i'm trying to approach this thing. This will be a longer post, so I"m going to just post my realizations here early, to save anyone reading from going further to get to the point...
1. At this point in my quit, I"m totally unafraid of craves, etc. I"ve been tested. But i am not being cocky. Like a quit mentor here suggested to me, I"ve practiced using the tools here to help me. But the danger of the addiction has not gone away, and it never will. Around this time in a quit, it seems that the real ongoing danger comes to the fore-- that danger is complacency. I see it. I can see now why daily role posting is critical. I've seen failures on the site here, i know my own failed quits in the past, i read about other failed quits from the site. I konw more caves will come to our little brotherhood, and I know it's a game of russian roullette for me if I were ever to decide to fall off this program here and stop posting. I am determined to remain here. I'm inspired by some of the quitters here, and uplifted by many of you.
2. I am increasingly developing a belief that once you start to clean up a major messy area of your life, like dipping and addiciton for so many of us, other things can potentially start to clean up too- in some sort of connection. If you're a Christian, maybe "the Lord starts working in mysterious ways" or if you are buddhist maybe Kharma goes about making other changes in your life when you start to clean it up. Change is not always, and arguably never, comfortable when we go through it. Otherwise we would have chosen the change long ago. But it sure does seem that when it rains it pours, many times, and i can't help but think there must be a connection.
3. I am absolutely committed to fighting what this drug does to us humans. It's ridiculous that it is allowed to be sold so easily, and perpetuated ignorance, that is only meant to benefit big tobacco, is allowed to continue in our society. This stuff is as bad of a drug, this addiction is as bad, as can be imagined! It is so harmful, and so addictive, and effects us all in so many ways. I will fight it. The fight is in the streets-- it's one by one, helping those who are strong enough to do it with support. It is also in education- and I'm constantly talking to people about just how terribly addictive this stuff is. I intend to continue to learn, from some fine examples here, how I can become my own advocate for quit, especially once I have a little time more under my own quit belt. The intention and commitment is already there though.
Ok, those are the insights. Here's where I've been lately. In November I posted about some frustrations I was having at home- my live-in partner, common law wife, had been doing some financial misdeeds that were a betrayal to me and busted my credit up pretty bad, not to mention racked up some debt. Alll sorts of trigger times, but not anything I couldn't handle with some visits back here, texts with quit bros, etc. Emotionally, however, I was feeling betrayed and trying to sort through whether I could learn to trust her again, etc. and dealing with the pending end of the relationship.
That sort of uncomfortable silence and delicate balance remained, as she and the kids needed to stay in the house as well as me. The took a couple of trips around the holiday times, fincanced by her family members pitching in. We weren't talking much though, outside of what was needed to function.
In her text to me about when she was coming home from the Christmas/New Years visit to her childhood home they made, she also told me she wanted talk about some heavy stuff with me. Being pretty excitable, of course that was a little nerve wracking for me, and gave me craves/triggers, but they weren't a problem, I am used to handling them now and i'm committed above all else to being quit.
When we had the talk, the next bomb came. She has been diagnosed with cervical cancer. WTF?!?!? it sucks. I was shook up for a few days, as this was about all I could handle emotionally. I sought out a therapist to help me with anger at the surface before, then this Monday went into his office and bawled my eyes out with all the emotion and jumbled up mess of conflicting feelings about her, myself, everything. Let me put a plug in here for therapy, it can really help and i'm not ever ashamed to say I used it in my life when needed. Just like having a physical injury sometimes we need a doc and/or PT, same is true for emotions- we can get injured and need help getting back on track.
Well this story above created what has to be the most intense, confusing, and hard, sucky period of my life so far, including a pretty messed up childhood at times. This is relevant to my quit because it was so intense. This woulld have broken me before. I would be chewing a can or two per day through this, when I was a 2-3 cans per week chewer normally. And I do get some hard craves, the "habitual" sort of ones i described in an earlier post to myself. But make no mistake, I am not tempted at all to chew or get any other access to nicotine. When the craves hit, they just remind me how much I hate nicotine. Then I'm sort of thankful for them for doing that. No temptation whatsoever from a crave, and this could go on forever as far as I can see. The issue that remains though, is really clear- at this point, complacency is the danger. As i read stories of caves on the site here, that seems to be the common thread too. I am now wary as heck against complacency, and committed to not let it happen in me.
These things in my domestic relationship are really hard to sort out. I do see a common thread of cleaning up, bringing to light things that were already there, but hidden. This sort of seems like a ripple effect of my decision to quit my ninja dipping and come to terms with an addiction that was never understood or admitted to before. All these other things that have been going on in my home involve something coming to light, that was not in the light before. Each of them would be worse if it continued in the darkness. So, if and when I can remove myself from the varous hurts and fears, etc involved, I can always find at least some gratitude that it came to light rather than continue to fester.
I recognize all sorts of spiritual and religious perspectives, and it seems like quite a few of them would point to the evil of the nicotine, and the other problems that were under the surface in my life, as being of a kindred sort. That is why I am committed to becoming a warrior against the nic bitch.
My life is in a transition in many levels right now, and I will have some more tough times to get through as it all sorts out, and i can't know much about how a lot of it will work out in the end. I pray so much for my partner's health to get better, and ask for your prayers for the same, however you pray. I hope for the best for both of us to result from the tension in our relationship from her own shopping addiction that led to the credit mess and deceit. All these events in her life seem to have given her a new and better perspective than I have seen in a long time from her, and i'm grateful for that. I will sort though and survive the credit issues, although I'm not certain of how long etc that will take- i'm just confident that it'll work out with some effort. The one thing I do know is that I don't want any damned poison weed in my mouth.
I would have had to break the "quit" so many times before through all this. Now I'm not tempted. I get headaches, funks, huge stress, anxiety, and all other sorts of feelings were triggers before. Some of them still are, and I have to smack the bitch down as she whispers in my ear or does other stuff that'd make some of you more ghey guys jealous, but she ain't getting anywhere with me, I"m just not interested in any way. Like I said, complacency is my danger now, and my plan for that is to follow the method that works here. I am so thankful for the fact that despite all this am am still quit and clearly planning to stay that way.
Final bonus- bulding my accountabilty network has also given me some great bros who I can reach out to when the times get tough besides addiction, and that is something that I always wanted more of. In an earlier post, I mentioned how I think the poison even isolated me in that way over the years too. Thanks KTC!
Damn. No battle tougher than life. Congrats on staying on the course of change. Now you are experiencing life on lifes terms.
Nicotine never saves, heals or cures. It enslaves, hurts and kills.
Very sorry about you personal situation and inspired by your grit.
Never, Never, Never, ever Surrender.
I read in the KJV Old Testament. Exodus:16. It gave me perspective that when we gain our freedom, we sometimes think slavery was better because the wilderness sucks.
Make it through the wilderness trials...You will get manna but you need time to rewire and reprogram.
Life Gets Better When you face it nic Free
-
Day 78
I've been going through some sh*t for a while, as some here know. Some of it's led to some realizations about my quit, that I want to record here. As for the stuff i've been wading through, it's tough to put it here but I will because i think isolation is part of the disease of addiction, and i want to battle that. Plus, maybe this will help someone else get through their own tough spots. It sure helped me to find out you all were here and getting through I thought for years I dealt with alone. So there's real value in terms of openness and it's part of how i'm trying to approach this thing. This will be a longer post, so I"m going to just post my realizations here early, to save anyone reading from going further to get to the point...
1. At this point in my quit, I"m totally unafraid of craves, etc. I"ve been tested. But i am not being cocky. Like a quit mentor here suggested to me, I"ve practiced using the tools here to help me. But the danger of the addiction has not gone away, and it never will. Around this time in a quit, it seems that the real ongoing danger comes to the fore-- that danger is complacency. I see it. I can see now why daily role posting is critical. I've seen failures on the site here, i know my own failed quits in the past, i read about other failed quits from the site. I konw more caves will come to our little brotherhood, and I know it's a game of russian roullette for me if I were ever to decide to fall off this program here and stop posting. I am determined to remain here. I'm inspired by some of the quitters here, and uplifted by many of you.
2. I am increasingly developing a belief that once you start to clean up a major messy area of your life, like dipping and addiciton for so many of us, other things can potentially start to clean up too- in some sort of connection. If you're a Christian, maybe "the Lord starts working in mysterious ways" or if you are buddhist maybe Kharma goes about making other changes in your life when you start to clean it up. Change is not always, and arguably never, comfortable when we go through it. Otherwise we would have chosen the change long ago. But it sure does seem that when it rains it pours, many times, and i can't help but think there must be a connection.
3. I am absolutely committed to fighting what this drug does to us humans. It's ridiculous that it is allowed to be sold so easily, and perpetuated ignorance, that is only meant to benefit big tobacco, is allowed to continue in our society. This stuff is as bad of a drug, this addiction is as bad, as can be imagined! It is so harmful, and so addictive, and effects us all in so many ways. I will fight it. The fight is in the streets-- it's one by one, helping those who are strong enough to do it with support. It is also in education- and I'm constantly talking to people about just how terribly addictive this stuff is. I intend to continue to learn, from some fine examples here, how I can become my own advocate for quit, especially once I have a little time more under my own quit belt. The intention and commitment is already there though.
Ok, those are the insights. Here's where I've been lately. In November I posted about some frustrations I was having at home- my live-in partner, common law wife, had been doing some financial misdeeds that were a betrayal to me and busted my credit up pretty bad, not to mention racked up some debt. Alll sorts of trigger times, but not anything I couldn't handle with some visits back here, texts with quit bros, etc. Emotionally, however, I was feeling betrayed and trying to sort through whether I could learn to trust her again, etc. and dealing with the pending end of the relationship.
That sort of uncomfortable silence and delicate balance remained, as she and the kids needed to stay in the house as well as me. The took a couple of trips around the holiday times, fincanced by her family members pitching in. We weren't talking much though, outside of what was needed to function.
In her text to me about when she was coming home from the Christmas/New Years visit to her childhood home they made, she also told me she wanted talk about some heavy stuff with me. Being pretty excitable, of course that was a little nerve wracking for me, and gave me craves/triggers, but they weren't a problem, I am used to handling them now and i'm committed above all else to being quit.
When we had the talk, the next bomb came. She has been diagnosed with cervical cancer. WTF?!?!? it sucks. I was shook up for a few days, as this was about all I could handle emotionally. I sought out a therapist to help me with anger at the surface before, then this Monday went into his office and bawled my eyes out with all the emotion and jumbled up mess of conflicting feelings about her, myself, everything. Let me put a plug in here for therapy, it can really help and i'm not ever ashamed to say I used it in my life when needed. Just like having a physical injury sometimes we need a doc and/or PT, same is true for emotions- we can get injured and need help getting back on track.
Well this story above created what has to be the most intense, confusing, and hard, sucky period of my life so far, including a pretty messed up childhood at times. This is relevant to my quit because it was so intense. This woulld have broken me before. I would be chewing a can or two per day through this, when I was a 2-3 cans per week chewer normally. And I do get some hard craves, the "habitual" sort of ones i described in an earlier post to myself. But make no mistake, I am not tempted at all to chew or get any other access to nicotine. When the craves hit, they just remind me how much I hate nicotine. Then I'm sort of thankful for them for doing that. No temptation whatsoever from a crave, and this could go on forever as far as I can see. The issue that remains though, is really clear- at this point, complacency is the danger. As i read stories of caves on the site here, that seems to be the common thread too. I am now wary as heck against complacency, and committed to not let it happen in me.
These things in my domestic relationship are really hard to sort out. I do see a common thread of cleaning up, bringing to light things that were already there, but hidden. This sort of seems like a ripple effect of my decision to quit my ninja dipping and come to terms with an addiction that was never understood or admitted to before. All these other things that have been going on in my home involve something coming to light, that was not in the light before. Each of them would be worse if it continued in the darkness. So, if and when I can remove myself from the varous hurts and fears, etc involved, I can always find at least some gratitude that it came to light rather than continue to fester.
I recognize all sorts of spiritual and religious perspectives, and it seems like quite a few of them would point to the evil of the nicotine, and the other problems that were under the surface in my life, as being of a kindred sort. That is why I am committed to becoming a warrior against the nic bitch.Â
My life is in a transition in many levels right now, and I will have some more tough times to get through as it all sorts out, and i can't know much about how a lot of it will work out in the end. I pray so much for my partner's health to get better, and ask for your prayers for the same, however you pray. I hope for the best for both of us to result from the tension in our relationship from her own shopping addiction that led to the credit mess and deceit. All these events in her life seem to have given her a new and better perspective than I have seen in a long time from her, and i'm grateful for that. I will sort though and survive the credit issues, although I'm not certain of how long etc that will take- i'm just confident that it'll work out with some effort. The one thing I do know is that I don't want any damned poison weed in my mouth.
I would have had to break the "quit" so many times before through all this. Now I'm not tempted. I get headaches, funks, huge stress, anxiety, and all other sorts of feelings were triggers before. Some of them still are, and I have to smack the bitch down as she whispers in my ear or does other stuff that'd make some of you more ghey guys jealous, but she ain't getting anywhere with me, I"m just not interested in any way. Like I said, complacency is my danger now, and my plan for that is to follow the method that works here. I am so thankful for the fact that despite all this am am still quit and clearly planning to stay that way.
Final bonus- bulding my accountabilty network has also given me some great bros who I can reach out to when the times get tough besides addiction, and that is something that I always wanted more of. In an earlier post, I mentioned how I think the poison even isolated me in that way over the years too. Thanks KTC!
Damn. No battle tougher than life. Congrats on staying on the course of change. Now you are experiencing life on lifes terms.
Nicotine never saves, heals or cures. It enslaves, hurts and kills.
Very sorry about you personal situation and inspired by your grit.
Never, Never, Never, ever Surrender.
I read in the KJV Old Testament. Exodus:16. It gave me perspective that when we gain our freedom, we sometimes think slavery was better because the wilderness sucks.
Make it through the wilderness trials...You will get manna but you need time to rewire and reprogram.
Life Gets Better When you face it nic Free
Got your back brother. Hang tough and keep enjoying life despite tough circumstances.
-
Day 78
I've been going through some sh*t for a while, as some here know. Some of it's led to some realizations about my quit, that I want to record here. As for the stuff i've been wading through, it's tough to put it here but I will because i think isolation is part of the disease of addiction, and i want to battle that. Plus, maybe this will help someone else get through their own tough spots. It sure helped me to find out you all were here and getting through I thought for years I dealt with alone. So there's real value in terms of openness and it's part of how i'm trying to approach this thing. This will be a longer post, so I"m going to just post my realizations here early, to save anyone reading from going further to get to the point...
1. At this point in my quit, I"m totally unafraid of craves, etc. I"ve been tested. But i am not being cocky. Like a quit mentor here suggested to me, I"ve practiced using the tools here to help me. But the danger of the addiction has not gone away, and it never will. Around this time in a quit, it seems that the real ongoing danger comes to the fore-- that danger is complacency. I see it. I can see now why daily role posting is critical. I've seen failures on the site here, i know my own failed quits in the past, i read about other failed quits from the site. I konw more caves will come to our little brotherhood, and I know it's a game of russian roullette for me if I were ever to decide to fall off this program here and stop posting. I am determined to remain here. I'm inspired by some of the quitters here, and uplifted by many of you.
2. I am increasingly developing a belief that once you start to clean up a major messy area of your life, like dipping and addiciton for so many of us, other things can potentially start to clean up too- in some sort of connection. If you're a Christian, maybe "the Lord starts working in mysterious ways" or if you are buddhist maybe Kharma goes about making other changes in your life when you start to clean it up. Change is not always, and arguably never, comfortable when we go through it. Otherwise we would have chosen the change long ago. But it sure does seem that when it rains it pours, many times, and i can't help but think there must be a connection.
3. I am absolutely committed to fighting what this drug does to us humans. It's ridiculous that it is allowed to be sold so easily, and perpetuated ignorance, that is only meant to benefit big tobacco, is allowed to continue in our society. This stuff is as bad of a drug, this addiction is as bad, as can be imagined! It is so harmful, and so addictive, and effects us all in so many ways. I will fight it. The fight is in the streets-- it's one by one, helping those who are strong enough to do it with support. It is also in education- and I'm constantly talking to people about just how terribly addictive this stuff is. I intend to continue to learn, from some fine examples here, how I can become my own advocate for quit, especially once I have a little time more under my own quit belt. The intention and commitment is already there though.
Ok, those are the insights. Here's where I've been lately. In November I posted about some frustrations I was having at home- my live-in partner, common law wife, had been doing some financial misdeeds that were a betrayal to me and busted my credit up pretty bad, not to mention racked up some debt. Alll sorts of trigger times, but not anything I couldn't handle with some visits back here, texts with quit bros, etc. Emotionally, however, I was feeling betrayed and trying to sort through whether I could learn to trust her again, etc. and dealing with the pending end of the relationship.
That sort of uncomfortable silence and delicate balance remained, as she and the kids needed to stay in the house as well as me. The took a couple of trips around the holiday times, fincanced by her family members pitching in. We weren't talking much though, outside of what was needed to function.
In her text to me about when she was coming home from the Christmas/New Years visit to her childhood home they made, she also told me she wanted talk about some heavy stuff with me. Being pretty excitable, of course that was a little nerve wracking for me, and gave me craves/triggers, but they weren't a problem, I am used to handling them now and i'm committed above all else to being quit.
When we had the talk, the next bomb came. She has been diagnosed with cervical cancer. WTF?!?!? it sucks. I was shook up for a few days, as this was about all I could handle emotionally. I sought out a therapist to help me with anger at the surface before, then this Monday went into his office and bawled my eyes out with all the emotion and jumbled up mess of conflicting feelings about her, myself, everything. Let me put a plug in here for therapy, it can really help and i'm not ever ashamed to say I used it in my life when needed. Just like having a physical injury sometimes we need a doc and/or PT, same is true for emotions- we can get injured and need help getting back on track.
Well this story above created what has to be the most intense, confusing, and hard, sucky period of my life so far, including a pretty messed up childhood at times. This is relevant to my quit because it was so intense. This woulld have broken me before. I would be chewing a can or two per day through this, when I was a 2-3 cans per week chewer normally. And I do get some hard craves, the "habitual" sort of ones i described in an earlier post to myself. But make no mistake, I am not tempted at all to chew or get any other access to nicotine. When the craves hit, they just remind me how much I hate nicotine. Then I'm sort of thankful for them for doing that. No temptation whatsoever from a crave, and this could go on forever as far as I can see. The issue that remains though, is really clear- at this point, complacency is the danger. As i read stories of caves on the site here, that seems to be the common thread too. I am now wary as heck against complacency, and committed to not let it happen in me.
These things in my domestic relationship are really hard to sort out. I do see a common thread of cleaning up, bringing to light things that were already there, but hidden. This sort of seems like a ripple effect of my decision to quit my ninja dipping and come to terms with an addiction that was never understood or admitted to before. All these other things that have been going on in my home involve something coming to light, that was not in the light before. Each of them would be worse if it continued in the darkness. So, if and when I can remove myself from the varous hurts and fears, etc involved, I can always find at least some gratitude that it came to light rather than continue to fester.
I recognize all sorts of spiritual and religious perspectives, and it seems like quite a few of them would point to the evil of the nicotine, and the other problems that were under the surface in my life, as being of a kindred sort. That is why I am committed to becoming a warrior against the nic bitch.Â
My life is in a transition in many levels right now, and I will have some more tough times to get through as it all sorts out, and i can't know much about how a lot of it will work out in the end. I pray so much for my partner's health to get better, and ask for your prayers for the same, however you pray. I hope for the best for both of us to result from the tension in our relationship from her own shopping addiction that led to the credit mess and deceit. All these events in her life seem to have given her a new and better perspective than I have seen in a long time from her, and i'm grateful for that. I will sort though and survive the credit issues, although I'm not certain of how long etc that will take- i'm just confident that it'll work out with some effort. The one thing I do know is that I don't want any damned poison weed in my mouth.
I would have had to break the "quit" so many times before through all this. Now I'm not tempted. I get headaches, funks, huge stress, anxiety, and all other sorts of feelings were triggers before. Some of them still are, and I have to smack the bitch down as she whispers in my ear or does other stuff that'd make some of you more ghey guys jealous, but she ain't getting anywhere with me, I"m just not interested in any way. Like I said, complacency is my danger now, and my plan for that is to follow the method that works here. I am so thankful for the fact that despite all this am am still quit and clearly planning to stay that way.
Final bonus- bulding my accountabilty network has also given me some great bros who I can reach out to when the times get tough besides addiction, and that is something that I always wanted more of. In an earlier post, I mentioned how I think the poison even isolated me in that way over the years too. Thanks KTC!
Damn. No battle tougher than life. Congrats on staying on the course of change. Now you are experiencing life on lifes terms.
Nicotine never saves, heals or cures. It enslaves, hurts and kills.
Very sorry about you personal situation and inspired by your grit.
Never, Never, Never, ever Surrender.
I read in the KJV Old Testament. Exodus:16. It gave me perspective that when we gain our freedom, we sometimes think slavery was better because the wilderness sucks.
Make it through the wilderness trials...You will get manna but you need time to rewire and reprogram.
Life Gets Better When you face it nic Free
Got your back brother. Hang tough and keep enjoying life despite tough circumstances.
Just wanted to chime in too. Your strength is inspiring to us all Brett. Stay committed and believe that things will get better. You have the right frame of mind and a lot of support. I'm sending good vibes over the sierras and the rockies. They should be there soon..... :D
-
Day 78
I've been going through some sh*t for a while, as some here know. Some of it's led to some realizations about my quit, that I want to record here. As for the stuff i've been wading through, it's tough to put it here but I will because i think isolation is part of the disease of addiction, and i want to battle that. Plus, maybe this will help someone else get through their own tough spots. It sure helped me to find out you all were here and getting through I thought for years I dealt with alone. So there's real value in terms of openness and it's part of how i'm trying to approach this thing. This will be a longer post, so I"m going to just post my realizations here early, to save anyone reading from going further to get to the point...
1. At this point in my quit, I"m totally unafraid of craves, etc. I"ve been tested. But i am not being cocky. Like a quit mentor here suggested to me, I"ve practiced using the tools here to help me. But the danger of the addiction has not gone away, and it never will. Around this time in a quit, it seems that the real ongoing danger comes to the fore-- that danger is complacency. I see it. I can see now why daily role posting is critical. I've seen failures on the site here, i know my own failed quits in the past, i read about other failed quits from the site. I konw more caves will come to our little brotherhood, and I know it's a game of russian roullette for me if I were ever to decide to fall off this program here and stop posting. I am determined to remain here. I'm inspired by some of the quitters here, and uplifted by many of you.
2. I am increasingly developing a belief that once you start to clean up a major messy area of your life, like dipping and addiciton for so many of us, other things can potentially start to clean up too- in some sort of connection. If you're a Christian, maybe "the Lord starts working in mysterious ways" or if you are buddhist maybe Kharma goes about making other changes in your life when you start to clean it up. Change is not always, and arguably never, comfortable when we go through it. Otherwise we would have chosen the change long ago. But it sure does seem that when it rains it pours, many times, and i can't help but think there must be a connection.
3. I am absolutely committed to fighting what this drug does to us humans. It's ridiculous that it is allowed to be sold so easily, and perpetuated ignorance, that is only meant to benefit big tobacco, is allowed to continue in our society. This stuff is as bad of a drug, this addiction is as bad, as can be imagined! It is so harmful, and so addictive, and effects us all in so many ways. I will fight it. The fight is in the streets-- it's one by one, helping those who are strong enough to do it with support. It is also in education- and I'm constantly talking to people about just how terribly addictive this stuff is. I intend to continue to learn, from some fine examples here, how I can become my own advocate for quit, especially once I have a little time more under my own quit belt. The intention and commitment is already there though.
Ok, those are the insights. Here's where I've been lately. In November I posted about some frustrations I was having at home- my live-in partner, common law wife, had been doing some financial misdeeds that were a betrayal to me and busted my credit up pretty bad, not to mention racked up some debt. Alll sorts of trigger times, but not anything I couldn't handle with some visits back here, texts with quit bros, etc. Emotionally, however, I was feeling betrayed and trying to sort through whether I could learn to trust her again, etc. and dealing with the pending end of the relationship.
That sort of uncomfortable silence and delicate balance remained, as she and the kids needed to stay in the house as well as me. The took a couple of trips around the holiday times, fincanced by her family members pitching in. We weren't talking much though, outside of what was needed to function.
In her text to me about when she was coming home from the Christmas/New Years visit to her childhood home they made, she also told me she wanted talk about some heavy stuff with me. Being pretty excitable, of course that was a little nerve wracking for me, and gave me craves/triggers, but they weren't a problem, I am used to handling them now and i'm committed above all else to being quit.
When we had the talk, the next bomb came. She has been diagnosed with cervical cancer. WTF?!?!? it sucks. I was shook up for a few days, as this was about all I could handle emotionally. I sought out a therapist to help me with anger at the surface before, then this Monday went into his office and bawled my eyes out with all the emotion and jumbled up mess of conflicting feelings about her, myself, everything. Let me put a plug in here for therapy, it can really help and i'm not ever ashamed to say I used it in my life when needed. Just like having a physical injury sometimes we need a doc and/or PT, same is true for emotions- we can get injured and need help getting back on track.
Well this story above created what has to be the most intense, confusing, and hard, sucky period of my life so far, including a pretty messed up childhood at times. This is relevant to my quit because it was so intense. This woulld have broken me before. I would be chewing a can or two per day through this, when I was a 2-3 cans per week chewer normally. And I do get some hard craves, the "habitual" sort of ones i described in an earlier post to myself. But make no mistake, I am not tempted at all to chew or get any other access to nicotine. When the craves hit, they just remind me how much I hate nicotine. Then I'm sort of thankful for them for doing that. No temptation whatsoever from a crave, and this could go on forever as far as I can see. The issue that remains though, is really clear- at this point, complacency is the danger. As i read stories of caves on the site here, that seems to be the common thread too. I am now wary as heck against complacency, and committed to not let it happen in me.
These things in my domestic relationship are really hard to sort out. I do see a common thread of cleaning up, bringing to light things that were already there, but hidden. This sort of seems like a ripple effect of my decision to quit my ninja dipping and come to terms with an addiction that was never understood or admitted to before. All these other things that have been going on in my home involve something coming to light, that was not in the light before. Each of them would be worse if it continued in the darkness. So, if and when I can remove myself from the varous hurts and fears, etc involved, I can always find at least some gratitude that it came to light rather than continue to fester.
I recognize all sorts of spiritual and religious perspectives, and it seems like quite a few of them would point to the evil of the nicotine, and the other problems that were under the surface in my life, as being of a kindred sort. That is why I am committed to becoming a warrior against the nic bitch.Â
My life is in a transition in many levels right now, and I will have some more tough times to get through as it all sorts out, and i can't know much about how a lot of it will work out in the end. I pray so much for my partner's health to get better, and ask for your prayers for the same, however you pray. I hope for the best for both of us to result from the tension in our relationship from her own shopping addiction that led to the credit mess and deceit. All these events in her life seem to have given her a new and better perspective than I have seen in a long time from her, and i'm grateful for that. I will sort though and survive the credit issues, although I'm not certain of how long etc that will take- i'm just confident that it'll work out with some effort. The one thing I do know is that I don't want any damned poison weed in my mouth.
I would have had to break the "quit" so many times before through all this. Now I'm not tempted. I get headaches, funks, huge stress, anxiety, and all other sorts of feelings were triggers before. Some of them still are, and I have to smack the bitch down as she whispers in my ear or does other stuff that'd make some of you more ghey guys jealous, but she ain't getting anywhere with me, I"m just not interested in any way. Like I said, complacency is my danger now, and my plan for that is to follow the method that works here. I am so thankful for the fact that despite all this am am still quit and clearly planning to stay that way.
Final bonus- bulding my accountabilty network has also given me some great bros who I can reach out to when the times get tough besides addiction, and that is something that I always wanted more of. In an earlier post, I mentioned how I think the poison even isolated me in that way over the years too. Thanks KTC!
Damn. No battle tougher than life. Congrats on staying on the course of change. Now you are experiencing life on lifes terms.
Nicotine never saves, heals or cures. It enslaves, hurts and kills.
Very sorry about you personal situation and inspired by your grit.
Never, Never, Never, ever Surrender.
I read in the KJV Old Testament. Exodus:16. It gave me perspective that when we gain our freedom, we sometimes think slavery was better because the wilderness sucks.
Make it through the wilderness trials...You will get manna but you need time to rewire and reprogram.
Life Gets Better When you face it nic Free
Got your back brother. Hang tough and keep enjoying life despite tough circumstances.
Just wanted to chime in too. Your strength is inspiring to us all Brett. Stay committed and believe that things will get better. You have the right frame of mind and a lot of support. I'm sending good vibes over the sierras and the rockies. They should be there soon..... :D
Learning to successfully win this fight one day at a time can and will improve other parts of your life. You've got a great recap of some great wins. Thanks for sharing and being a great member if this community.
-
Look who's done got all grown up....
I am using perfect grammar since you write so well.... :D
I like comparing your quit to my timeline and I get really excited when I see the days coming up for you.
"Day 86-99: Zero craves, zero dip dreams and temper under control. The strong craves when I drink are also gone. I am disgusted when I see someone dip. Proudly watching my group hit HOF one at a time; which is just how we quit, one day at a time. My guard is still held high as I know the fight is far from over".
You beat this thing from day one and you, much like myself, understand that the danger is complacency. This means that you will keep your guard up and you will win this war.
Your stories inspire me and help me be successful in my quit.
When you write your first book, I want the first signed copy....
-
Day 78
I've been going through some sh*t for a while, as some here know. Some of it's led to some realizations about my quit, that I want to record here. As for the stuff i've been wading through, it's tough to put it here but I will because i think isolation is part of the disease of addiction, and i want to battle that. Plus, maybe this will help someone else get through their own tough spots. It sure helped me to find out you all were here and getting through I thought for years I dealt with alone. So there's real value in terms of openness and it's part of how i'm trying to approach this thing. This will be a longer post, so I"m going to just post my realizations here early, to save anyone reading from going further to get to the point...
1. At this point in my quit, I"m totally unafraid of craves, etc. I"ve been tested. But i am not being cocky. Like a quit mentor here suggested to me, I"ve practiced using the tools here to help me. But the danger of the addiction has not gone away, and it never will. Around this time in a quit, it seems that the real ongoing danger comes to the fore-- that danger is complacency. I see it. I can see now why daily role posting is critical. I've seen failures on the site here, i know my own failed quits in the past, i read about other failed quits from the site. I konw more caves will come to our little brotherhood, and I know it's a game of russian roullette for me if I were ever to decide to fall off this program here and stop posting. I am determined to remain here. I'm inspired by some of the quitters here, and uplifted by many of you.
2. I am increasingly developing a belief that once you start to clean up a major messy area of your life, like dipping and addiciton for so many of us, other things can potentially start to clean up too- in some sort of connection. If you're a Christian, maybe "the Lord starts working in mysterious ways" or if you are buddhist maybe Kharma goes about making other changes in your life when you start to clean it up. Change is not always, and arguably never, comfortable when we go through it. Otherwise we would have chosen the change long ago. But it sure does seem that when it rains it pours, many times, and i can't help but think there must be a connection.
3. I am absolutely committed to fighting what this drug does to us humans. It's ridiculous that it is allowed to be sold so easily, and perpetuated ignorance, that is only meant to benefit big tobacco, is allowed to continue in our society. This stuff is as bad of a drug, this addiction is as bad, as can be imagined! It is so harmful, and so addictive, and effects us all in so many ways. I will fight it. The fight is in the streets-- it's one by one, helping those who are strong enough to do it with support. It is also in education- and I'm constantly talking to people about just how terribly addictive this stuff is. I intend to continue to learn, from some fine examples here, how I can become my own advocate for quit, especially once I have a little time more under my own quit belt. The intention and commitment is already there though.
Ok, those are the insights. Here's where I've been lately. In November I posted about some frustrations I was having at home- my live-in partner, common law wife, had been doing some financial misdeeds that were a betrayal to me and busted my credit up pretty bad, not to mention racked up some debt. Alll sorts of trigger times, but not anything I couldn't handle with some visits back here, texts with quit bros, etc. Emotionally, however, I was feeling betrayed and trying to sort through whether I could learn to trust her again, etc. and dealing with the pending end of the relationship.
That sort of uncomfortable silence and delicate balance remained, as she and the kids needed to stay in the house as well as me. The took a couple of trips around the holiday times, fincanced by her family members pitching in. We weren't talking much though, outside of what was needed to function.
In her text to me about when she was coming home from the Christmas/New Years visit to her childhood home they made, she also told me she wanted talk about some heavy stuff with me. Being pretty excitable, of course that was a little nerve wracking for me, and gave me craves/triggers, but they weren't a problem, I am used to handling them now and i'm committed above all else to being quit.
When we had the talk, the next bomb came. She has been diagnosed with cervical cancer. WTF?!?!? it sucks. I was shook up for a few days, as this was about all I could handle emotionally. I sought out a therapist to help me with anger at the surface before, then this Monday went into his office and bawled my eyes out with all the emotion and jumbled up mess of conflicting feelings about her, myself, everything. Let me put a plug in here for therapy, it can really help and i'm not ever ashamed to say I used it in my life when needed. Just like having a physical injury sometimes we need a doc and/or PT, same is true for emotions- we can get injured and need help getting back on track.
Well this story above created what has to be the most intense, confusing, and hard, sucky period of my life so far, including a pretty messed up childhood at times. This is relevant to my quit because it was so intense. This woulld have broken me before. I would be chewing a can or two per day through this, when I was a 2-3 cans per week chewer normally. And I do get some hard craves, the "habitual" sort of ones i described in an earlier post to myself. But make no mistake, I am not tempted at all to chew or get any other access to nicotine. When the craves hit, they just remind me how much I hate nicotine. Then I'm sort of thankful for them for doing that. No temptation whatsoever from a crave, and this could go on forever as far as I can see. The issue that remains though, is really clear- at this point, complacency is the danger. As i read stories of caves on the site here, that seems to be the common thread too. I am now wary as heck against complacency, and committed to not let it happen in me.
These things in my domestic relationship are really hard to sort out. I do see a common thread of cleaning up, bringing to light things that were already there, but hidden. This sort of seems like a ripple effect of my decision to quit my ninja dipping and come to terms with an addiction that was never understood or admitted to before. All these other things that have been going on in my home involve something coming to light, that was not in the light before. Each of them would be worse if it continued in the darkness. So, if and when I can remove myself from the varous hurts and fears, etc involved, I can always find at least some gratitude that it came to light rather than continue to fester.
I recognize all sorts of spiritual and religious perspectives, and it seems like quite a few of them would point to the evil of the nicotine, and the other problems that were under the surface in my life, as being of a kindred sort. That is why I am committed to becoming a warrior against the nic bitch.Â
My life is in a transition in many levels right now, and I will have some more tough times to get through as it all sorts out, and i can't know much about how a lot of it will work out in the end. I pray so much for my partner's health to get better, and ask for your prayers for the same, however you pray. I hope for the best for both of us to result from the tension in our relationship from her own shopping addiction that led to the credit mess and deceit. All these events in her life seem to have given her a new and better perspective than I have seen in a long time from her, and i'm grateful for that. I will sort though and survive the credit issues, although I'm not certain of how long etc that will take- i'm just confident that it'll work out with some effort. The one thing I do know is that I don't want any damned poison weed in my mouth.
I would have had to break the "quit" so many times before through all this. Now I'm not tempted. I get headaches, funks, huge stress, anxiety, and all other sorts of feelings were triggers before. Some of them still are, and I have to smack the bitch down as she whispers in my ear or does other stuff that'd make some of you more ghey guys jealous, but she ain't getting anywhere with me, I"m just not interested in any way. Like I said, complacency is my danger now, and my plan for that is to follow the method that works here. I am so thankful for the fact that despite all this am am still quit and clearly planning to stay that way.
Final bonus- bulding my accountabilty network has also given me some great bros who I can reach out to when the times get tough besides addiction, and that is something that I always wanted more of. In an earlier post, I mentioned how I think the poison even isolated me in that way over the years too. Thanks KTC!
Damn. No battle tougher than life. Congrats on staying on the course of change. Now you are experiencing life on lifes terms.
Nicotine never saves, heals or cures. It enslaves, hurts and kills.
Very sorry about you personal situation and inspired by your grit.
Never, Never, Never, ever Surrender.
I read in the KJV Old Testament. Exodus:16. It gave me perspective that when we gain our freedom, we sometimes think slavery was better because the wilderness sucks.
Make it through the wilderness trials...You will get manna but you need time to rewire and reprogram.
Life Gets Better When you face it nic Free
Got your back brother. Hang tough and keep enjoying life despite tough circumstances.
Just wanted to chime in too. Your strength is inspiring to us all Brett. Stay committed and believe that things will get better. You have the right frame of mind and a lot of support. I'm sending good vibes over the sierras and the rockies. They should be there soon..... :D
Learning to successfully win this fight one day at a time can and will improve other parts of your life. You've got a great recap of some great wins. Thanks for sharing and being a great member if this community.
good share Brett. I think many of us found new strength to more closely examine our lives and clean it up once we got our quits established. Part of it is I can't tolerate addict behaviors and weaknesses in myself and don't want lame/weak excuses in an part of my life. Life gets messy and complicated, sorry you are in one of those patches. It will swing around again.
-
bah-dah bowm chicka bowm-bowm! Is that an atomic dog I hear? Somebody call George Clinton! Bootsy Collins! Oh yeah, i'm in the funk babies!
Quit log update from day 88: Here's what my version of this famed funk is like. It's mainly a flat feeling and hard, hard craves that feel like they're from much earlier in the quit. Flitters of fog that last no more than a couple of minutes. Sick and f-ing tired of craves, thinking about dipping or not dipping, wanting to be just free of the shit and all its consequences in my life- resentment for the fact that i've come this far and still have to deal with this. And ..... this is all ok with me. I've been watching some of the vets go through a simliar funk again at around 150 to 170 days too. Maybe these things just come up from time to time. I know a crave can hit out of nowhere at any time in the future, but the first year or so it seems to be normal for these longer cycles to set in.
Cbird told me early on to use the first 100 days to focus on learning the KTC tools to beat the addiction, and this funk experience proves he was right. The craves are hard, and other quitting issues come up, but i can beat them all becuase by now i have a lot of practice.
When I get too sick of all the fighting craves, I lean into the discomfort and it goes away. By leaning in I mean i just accept it and deal with it the way I have learned to deal with the discomfort of quitting in general-- by coming to the boards to help newer quitters and longer-term bros, and by connecting with others via text-- these are really helpful. I don't have to complain about my situation. Rather, I usually just reach out and check in with a close bro, or strike up a connection with someone new, or give a new quitter some encouragement. Exercise helps a lot too.
So, I guess this is how you do it. I think it takes so long to learn because the addiction is such a bad one, and we have to first also learn what it really means that we cannot ever have just one. NAFAR (never again for any reason) has to be truly understood.
Then, it takes actually reprogramming your behavior- learning how to act to protect your quit- and it has taken me this long to get to this point. The recovery means replacing behaviors that grew up to support the addiction, with ones that support the quit instead. That takes some time and effort.
I say it all the time, and so do a lot of other people, but I'm so greatful for this site and the people who are active here. Your commitment has given me the chance to live clean of the addiction. If I can help anyone else beat this evil, wicked, disease of bad choices and deception, that nobody ever really warned us about or protected us from, you can bet I will! If anyone who reads this needs some help, contact me!
I also want to say thank you to each of you who as given me support around the other stuff my journey has included lately. That means an awful lot. If I say much more about how much it means, Diesel's gonna call me ghey again so I'll leave it at that. 'na na'
-
bah-dah bowm chicka bowm-bowm! Is that an atomic dog I hear? Somebody call George Clinton! Bootsy Collins! Oh yeah, i'm in the funk babies!
Quit log update from day 88: Here's what my version of this famed funk is like. It's mainly a flat feeling and hard, hard craves that feel like they're from much earlier in the quit. Flitters of fog that last no more than a couple of minutes. Sick and f-ing tired of craves, thinking about dipping or not dipping, wanting to be just free of the shit and all its consequences in my life- resentment for the fact that i've come this far and still have to deal with this. And ..... this is all ok with me. I've been watching some of the vets go through a simliar funk again at around 150 to 170 days too. Maybe these things just come up from time to time. I know a crave can hit out of nowhere at any time in the future, but the first year or so it seems to be normal for these longer cycles to set in.
Cbird told me early on to use the first 100 days to focus on learning the KTC tools to beat the addiction, and this funk experience proves he was right. The craves are hard, and other quitting issues come up, but i can beat them all becuase by now i have a lot of practice.
When I get too sick of all the fighting craves, I lean into the discomfort and it goes away. By leaning in I mean i just accept it and deal with it the way I have learned to deal with the discomfort of quitting in general-- by coming to the boards to help newer quitters and longer-term bros, and by connecting with others via text-- these are really helpful. I don't have to complain about my situation. Rather, I usually just reach out and check in with a close bro, or strike up a connection with someone new, or give a new quitter some encouragement. Exercise helps a lot too.
So, I guess this is how you do it. I think it takes so long to learn because the addiction is such a bad one, and we have to first also learn what it really means that we cannot ever have just one. NAFAR (never again for any reason) has to be truly understood.
Then, it takes actually reprogramming your behavior- learning how to act to protect your quit- and it has taken me this long to get to this point. The recovery means replacing behaviors that grew up to support the addiction, with ones that support the quit instead. That takes some time and effort.
I say it all the time, and so do a lot of other people, but I'm so greatful for this site and the people who are active here. Your commitment has given me the chance to live clean of the addiction. If I can help anyone else beat this evil, wicked, disease of bad choices and deception, that nobody ever really warned us about or protected us from, you can bet I will! If anyone who reads this needs some help, contact me!
I also want to say thank you to each of you who as given me support around the other stuff my journey has included lately. That means an awful lot. If I say much more about how much it means, Diesel's gonna call me ghey again so I'll leave it at that. 'na na'
A Hazard to Yo Booty (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPtF-hvruDQ)
^^^^^^Bringin the Funk Bitches^^^^^
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Brettlees, you better finish this day strong. There are many of us who want to see you make it through today, including myself, and post up tomorrow with a big fat number. Stay strong, stay quit.
-
It's been a click of the clock since I posted to you Brett, how bout that 100. How bout that shit? Keep on quitting because I believe 101 is just as important.
Mogul
-
Hey Mogul and Steak nice to see you guys in here- Thanks for stopping by! You guys share in my quit for sure!
Steak, how bout I post a skinny followed by two fats real soon here? Oh yeah! Just another day really, but why not have some fun.
Thanks guys! I'll save space for you in the hall and leave a light on for damn sure.
-
Accountability 101 - newbies take notice Brett here chose to bring other quitters into his life and quit. He chose to invest in their quit as well. On top of all that he took the initiative and meet some people face to face. Finally how does a guy like this write in his chapter for day 100...this guy chose to arrange a meet up with other quitters one whom is a very much a veteran quitter who on here speaks when necessary and always offers sage advice, the other of which is very outspoken and stubborn as fuck.
This guy right here is a quitter, no ifs and or buts. He is a man of his word, he is a brother and most of all he is a guy I will always call a friend.
Brett and Tony I am looking forward to knocking back a few beers as we celebrate Brett's day 100 and my day 200 along with T-Cell's day 721.
IF you want to know how to make a potential cave epic, weave a huge web of accountability add in a few real human people whom you know will hunt you down and give it a roll.
Otherwise, meet new friends, have fun and quit being a douche dipper. This guy gets it.
P
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Accountability 101 - newbies take notice Brett here chose to bring other quitters into his life and quit. He chose to invest in their quit as well. On top of all that he took the initiative and meet some people face to face. Finally how does a guy like this write in his chapter for day 100...this guy chose to arrange a meet up with other quitters one whom is a very much a veteran quitter who on here speaks when necessary and always offers sage advice, the other of which is very outspoken and stubborn as fuck.
This guy right here is a quitter, no ifs and or buts. He is a man of his word, he is a brother and most of all he is a guy I will always call a friend.
Brett and Tony I am looking forward to knocking back a few beers as we celebrate Brett's day 100 and my day 200 along with T-Cell's day 721.
IF you want to know how to make a potential cave epic, weave a huge web of accountability add in a few real human people whom you know will hunt you down and give it a roll.
Otherwise, meet new friends, have fun and quit being a douche dipper. This guy gets it.
P
Brett is a total badass. Congrats on 100 days brother.
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Hey Brett, I just wanted to personally thank you for being such a great support for me especially during the hard times of my quit. I will always be thankful for all the supporting texts and sound advice. Also thanks for making time to meet up with me in Denver it really strengthened my quit accountability. You are a bad ass quitter and I am proud to be quit with you. Here is to no more projecting. The nic bitch can kiss my ass.
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Brett, way to go man and I am so glad you are sticking around. Thank you for all your support. I want nothing more than to be 31 days behind you always. Peace to you brother. Now carry on!
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Awesome 100 Brett! You've been a great inspiration and leader on this site. Celebrate your day 100, it is a big achievement. The only thing better than day 100 is adding 1 tomorrow. Thanks for bringing me along for the ride! Greatness is ahead.
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Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
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Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
-
Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
'oh yeah' Keep ON Keepin on Rez Bro 'oh yeah'
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Congrats on 100 bro! This is a great milestone. You are an inspirational quitter. I am proud to be quit with you today.
-
Great work man! 100 days is a beautiful thing. Keep it going...
-
Nice Job on your 100 days. Keep the +1's coming
-
Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
'oh yeah' Keep ON Keepin on Rez Bro 'oh yeah'
'BanDog'
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Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
'oh yeah' Keep ON Keepin on Rez Bro 'oh yeah'
'BanDog'
YES! I got the bananas lf! 'oh yeah'
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Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
'oh yeah' Keep ON Keepin on Rez Bro 'oh yeah'
'BanDog'
YES! I got the bananas lf! 'oh yeah'
Congrats. Now, keep going ODAAT.
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Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
'oh yeah' Keep ON Keepin on Rez Bro 'oh yeah'
'BanDog'
YES! I got the bananas lf! 'oh yeah'
Congrats. Now, keep going ODAAT.
Yes! Congrats!
-
Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
'oh yeah' Keep ON Keepin on Rez Bro 'oh yeah'
'BanDog'
YES! I got the bananas lf! 'oh yeah'
Congrats. Now, keep going ODAAT.
Yes! Congrats!
Wonderful work my friend.
Now keep at it.
-
Quitting is really simple.
Read everything on here, post roll call each morning and don't dip. Wow....that sounds so easy, doesn't it?
If you read through the other intro's you may see some of my same words on them but they always hold true so I will just repeat them...
You are in for one nasty fight but you have the tools here to make it.
Go load yourself up with gum, mints, fake chew, seeds and beef jerky. Also get some member phone numbers right now, they will help you through the rough parts.
Next, exercise to exhaustion every single day and drink so much water that you feel like you may bust. Both of these will help.
Make sure your wife reads about what you are going through. 99% chance that you are going to be a short fussed dick for the next 3-4 weeks. Try not to take it out on her and the kids. Get on here and take it out on us, we will be fine.
I quit with you.
I told you it was simple.....
I am really proud of you brother. Keep it up!!!!!!
-
Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
'oh yeah' Keep ON Keepin on Rez Bro 'oh yeah'
'BanDog'
YES! I got the bananas lf! 'oh yeah'
Congrats. Now, keep going ODAAT.
Yes! Congrats!
Wonderful work my friend.
Now keep at it.
'Cheers' Congrats Brett!
-
If you aren't desparately determined to quit, you have not yet learned enough about nicotine addiction.
This is really scary stuff. Once you understand this enemy, the appropriate reaction is to fight it like hell or run the hell away from it.
-
Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
'oh yeah' Keep ON Keepin on Rez Bro 'oh yeah'
'BanDog'
YES! I got the bananas lf! 'oh yeah'
Congrats. Now, keep going ODAAT.
Yes! Congrats!
Wonderful work my friend.
Now keep at it.
'Cheers' Congrats Brett!
Well done Sir, well done.
-
Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
'oh yeah' Keep ON Keepin on Rez Bro 'oh yeah'
'BanDog'
YES! I got the bananas lf! 'oh yeah'
Congrats. Now, keep going ODAAT.
Yes! Congrats!
Wonderful work my friend.
Now keep at it.
'Cheers' Congrats Brett!
Well done Sir, well done.
Well done! Quit on bad ass.
-
Awesome on the 100! Congrats!
nice work bro~! 'clap'
Grab a celebratory beverage and get right back on the road!
'Cheers'
'oh yeah' Keep ON Keepin on Rez Bro 'oh yeah'
'BanDog'
YES! I got the bananas lf! 'oh yeah'
Congrats. Now, keep going ODAAT.
Yes! Congrats!
Wonderful work my friend.
Now keep at it.
'Cheers' Congrats Brett!
Well done Sir, well done.
Proud of you bro. Keep at it daily.
-
It was a pleasure to meet both Brett and Corey last night, these guys completely get quitting. Funny how many addict behaviors and experiences we all shared without knowing it. Ended up staying out way past my bedtime, given the weather the mrs. wasn't happy. But it was sooo worth it.
Congrats again to you both on you milestones yesterday. Enjoy and be proud of them, you earned them.
-
It was a pleasure to meet both Brett and Corey last night, these guys completely get quitting. Funny how many addict behaviors and experiences we all shared without knowing it. Ended up staying out way past my bedtime, given the weather the mrs. wasn't happy. But it was sooo worth it.
Congrats again to you both on you milestones yesterday. Enjoy and be proud of them, you earned them.
So awesome!
-
Great time getting wings and beer with you and canvasback tonight. If you guys need anything let me know. I got your backs. I have total faith in Brett as a quitter. He's rock solid and if he thinks about caving he will call me first.
-
Great time getting wings and beer with you and Canvasback tonight. If you guys need anything let me know. I got your backs. I have total faith in Brett as a quitter. He's rock solid and if he thinks about caving he will call me first.
What a pleasure to meet Grizclaws and Canvasback tonight! Made my quit stronger without doubt! How about this- you don't cave unless you let me get the chew out of the can.. do we have a deal?? Same goes for Canvasback. If you're in, let me know. I'll take each of you at you word on it, now that i've met you in person i know i can trust both of you as men of honor to a very high degree.
If any newer quitters out there are reading this, you should definitely muster the courage and initiative to meet up with other quitters if the opportunity comes your way. It can increase the strength of you quit immensely- you'll see what I mean once you do it!
-
Great time getting wings and beer with you and Canvasback tonight. If you guys need anything let me know. I got your backs. I have total faith in Brett as a quitter. He's rock solid and if he thinks about caving he will call me first.
What a pleasure to meet Grizclaws and Canvasback tonight! Made my quit stronger without doubt! How about this- you don't cave unless you let me get the chew out of the can.. do we have a deal?? Same goes for Canvasback. If you're in, let me know. I'll take each of you at you word on it, now that i've met you in person i know i can trust both of you as men of honor to a very high degree.
If any newer quitters out there are reading this, you should definitely muster the courage and initiative to meet up with other quitters if the opportunity comes your way. It can increase the strength of you quit immensely- you'll see what I mean once you do it!
You guys get it. Some people come here willy nilly and post roll once in a while. They drop off at 100 days. Never make connections. Never meet anyone. Never post in intros. Never use chat. Those people are fools.... They always seem to come back with lame reasons that they caved.
Then there are guys like you. Helping one another helps yourself. Can you imagine sending a text to the guy you shared war stories with over beer for 3 hours a text that you let him down? That shit is real... Brotherhood + accountability = success. Keep pushing forward, you are about to get to some really good times.
-
Great time getting wings and beer with you and Canvasback tonight. If you guys need anything let me know. I got your backs. I have total faith in Brett as a quitter. He's rock solid and if he thinks about caving he will call me first.
What a pleasure to meet Grizclaws and Canvasback tonight! Made my quit stronger without doubt! How about this- you don't cave unless you let me get the chew out of the can.. do we have a deal?? Same goes for Canvasback. If you're in, let me know. I'll take each of you at you word on it, now that i've met you in person i know i can trust both of you as men of honor to a very high degree.
If any newer quitters out there are reading this, you should definitely muster the courage and initiative to meet up with other quitters if the opportunity comes your way. It can increase the strength of you quit immensely- you'll see what I mean once you do it!
Deal.
-
Day 121- quitters log. Not much to report, but it has been a while and I feel like I just want to log it in so I can leave it behind.
Not much change in my situation since last post, really. My quit is now boring. The nicbitch still whispers in my ear. I still am not going to be fooled by it. Complacency is still the enemy, and I am committed to not become complacent too. I am still dealing with some messy home life situations, and the upshot of all that is that I keep facing things that i would have used as justifications to really ramp up my nicotine consumption in the past. However, I have no interest in using nicotine to deal with that stress now. I guess some reprogramming has been successful, and i'm damned glad.
I continue to get almost daily affirmative reinforcement about how important the network of fellow quitters here is to me. There are bros that have literally helped me through some major shit where I really took a lot of comfort in someone giving a damn enough to reach out. And, I am accountable to them not to use nicotine. Easy enough tradeoff for me.
I still owe a HOF speech, and I'm waiting for the inspiration. Really, HOF has turned out to be no big deal at all to me. But I woudl like to eventually get something down in writing that may help someone else. In the meantime, I"m just stacking +1's, creating lasting connections, and helping others when I can. Also learning how to deal with life in real-time, directly, without the damned poison crutch that really wasn't a crutch.
Been reading today about a guy who wants to stop posting after 200 days. This doesn't make sense to me. I've tried to learn a lot from others, and i'm convinced that things get better and better, but don't get really great until much later in the game than 200 days. More like they really seem to start to open up at a year or so, then really good around 500 to 1000 days. Yet, I've noticed there are funks at almost predictable times along the way even that long quit, and random big craves can creep up any time. I can't imagine walking away so soon as 200 days, and honestly I admire some of the people that have been around for 2years+ that right now I"d like to be helping others like them when I reach that time period.
Well, thats it for now. Damn i'm wordy sometimes. Looking forward to quite a few other quits that I've followed hitting HOF in the next few weeks- that'll be fun!
-
Day 121- quitters log. Not much to report, but it has been a while and I feel like I just want to log it in so I can leave it behind.
Not much change in my situation since last post, really. My quit is now boring. The nicbitch still whispers in my ear. I still am not going to be fooled by it. Complacency is still the enemy, and I am committed to not become complacent too. I am still dealing with some messy home life situations, and the upshot of all that is that I keep facing things that i would have used as justifications to really ramp up my nicotine consumption in the past. However, I have no interest in using nicotine to deal with that stress now. I guess some reprogramming has been successful, and i'm damned glad.
I continue to get almost daily affirmative reinforcement about how important the network of fellow quitters here is to me. There are bros that have literally helped me through some major shit where I really took a lot of comfort in someone giving a damn enough to reach out. And, I am accountable to them not to use nicotine. Easy enough tradeoff for me.
I still owe a HOF speech, and I'm waiting for the inspiration. Really, HOF has turned out to be no big deal at all to me. But I woudl like to eventually get something down in writing that may help someone else. In the meantime, I"m just stacking +1's, creating lasting connections, and helping others when I can. Also learning how to deal with life in real-time, directly, without the damned poison crutch that really wasn't a crutch.
Been reading today about a guy who wants to stop posting after 200 days. This doesn't make sense to me. I've tried to learn a lot from others, and i'm convinced that things get better and better, but don't get really great until much later in the game than 200 days. More like they really seem to start to open up at a year or so, then really good around 500 to 1000 days. Yet, I've noticed there are funks at almost predictable times along the way even that long quit, and random big craves can creep up any time. I can't imagine walking away so soon as 200 days, and honestly I admire some of the people that have been around for 2years+ that right now I"d like to be helping others like them when I reach that time period.
Well, thats it for now. Damn i'm wordy sometimes. Looking forward to quite a few other quits that I've followed hitting HOF in the next few weeks- that'll be fun!
B
I always look forward to hearing what's going on in that noggin of yours. So I am reassured that you see the importance of staying here and tending your quit. I know when you get around the your official speech it will be something that will strengthen us all (newbies and vets alike) Here' s to lots of boring quit days and even better days to come. Cheers! ;Ironman:
-
Day 121- quitters log. Not much to report, but it has been a while and I feel like I just want to log it in so I can leave it behind.
Not much change in my situation since last post, really. My quit is now boring. The nicbitch still whispers in my ear. I still am not going to be fooled by it. Complacency is still the enemy, and I am committed to not become complacent too. I am still dealing with some messy home life situations, and the upshot of all that is that I keep facing things that i would have used as justifications to really ramp up my nicotine consumption in the past. However, I have no interest in using nicotine to deal with that stress now. I guess some reprogramming has been successful, and i'm damned glad.
I continue to get almost daily affirmative reinforcement about how important the network of fellow quitters here is to me. There are bros that have literally helped me through some major shit where I really took a lot of comfort in someone giving a damn enough to reach out. And, I am accountable to them not to use nicotine. Easy enough tradeoff for me.
I still owe a HOF speech, and I'm waiting for the inspiration. Really, HOF has turned out to be no big deal at all to me. But I woudl like to eventually get something down in writing that may help someone else. In the meantime, I"m just stacking +1's, creating lasting connections, and helping others when I can. Also learning how to deal with life in real-time, directly, without the damned poison crutch that really wasn't a crutch.
Been reading today about a guy who wants to stop posting after 200 days. This doesn't make sense to me. I've tried to learn a lot from others, and i'm convinced that things get better and better, but don't get really great until much later in the game than 200 days. More like they really seem to start to open up at a year or so, then really good around 500 to 1000 days. Yet, I've noticed there are funks at almost predictable times along the way even that long quit, and random big craves can creep up any time. I can't imagine walking away so soon as 200 days, and honestly I admire some of the people that have been around for 2years+ that right now I"d like to be helping others like them when I reach that time period.
Well, thats it for now. Damn i'm wordy sometimes. Looking forward to quite a few other quits that I've followed hitting HOF in the next few weeks- that'll be fun!
B
I always look forward to hearing what's going on in that noggin of yours. So I am reassured that you see the importance of staying here and tending your quit. I know when you get around the your official speech it will be something that will strengthen us all (newbies and vets alike) Here' s to lots of boring quit days and even better days to come. Cheers! ;Ironman:
Don't sell your self short bro. The HOF might not seem like a big deal but think about were you were 101 days before that. It is a big deal. I get what you mean though. Technically its just another +1 but it symbolizes something very important. 100 days of freedom.
Im looking forward to reading your HOF speech
PB
-
Day 121- quitters log. Not much to report, but it has been a while and I feel like I just want to log it in so I can leave it behind.
Not much change in my situation since last post, really. My quit is now boring. The nicbitch still whispers in my ear. I still am not going to be fooled by it. Complacency is still the enemy, and I am committed to not become complacent too. I am still dealing with some messy home life situations, and the upshot of all that is that I keep facing things that i would have used as justifications to really ramp up my nicotine consumption in the past. However, I have no interest in using nicotine to deal with that stress now. I guess some reprogramming has been successful, and i'm damned glad.
I continue to get almost daily affirmative reinforcement about how important the network of fellow quitters here is to me. There are bros that have literally helped me through some major shit where I really took a lot of comfort in someone giving a damn enough to reach out. And, I am accountable to them not to use nicotine. Easy enough tradeoff for me.
I still owe a HOF speech, and I'm waiting for the inspiration. Really, HOF has turned out to be no big deal at all to me. But I woudl like to eventually get something down in writing that may help someone else. In the meantime, I"m just stacking +1's, creating lasting connections, and helping others when I can. Also learning how to deal with life in real-time, directly, without the damned poison crutch that really wasn't a crutch.
Been reading today about a guy who wants to stop posting after 200 days. This doesn't make sense to me. I've tried to learn a lot from others, and i'm convinced that things get better and better, but don't get really great until much later in the game than 200 days. More like they really seem to start to open up at a year or so, then really good around 500 to 1000 days. Yet, I've noticed there are funks at almost predictable times along the way even that long quit, and random big craves can creep up any time. I can't imagine walking away so soon as 200 days, and honestly I admire some of the people that have been around for 2years+ that right now I"d like to be helping others like them when I reach that time period.
Well, thats it for now. Damn i'm wordy sometimes. Looking forward to quite a few other quits that I've followed hitting HOF in the next few weeks- that'll be fun!
B
I always look forward to hearing what's going on in that noggin of yours. So I am reassured that you see the importance of staying here and tending your quit. I know when you get around the your official speech it will be something that will strengthen us all (newbies and vets alike) Here' s to lots of boring quit days and even better days to come. Cheers! ;Ironman:
Don't sell your self short bro. The HOF might not seem like a big deal but think about were you were 101 days before that. It is a big deal. I get what you mean though. Technically its just another +1 but it symbolizes something very important. 100 days of freedom.
Im looking forward to reading your HOF speech
PB
I am looking forward to reading your speech Brett. No pressure though. When the inspiration finally hits just make sure to get to a keyboard or dictation device right away. You've been a constant support to a lot of people. You have done this the right way and you should be very proud. Proud to quit with you brother.
-
Day 121- quitters log. Not much to report, but it has been a while and I feel like I just want to log it in so I can leave it behind.
Not much change in my situation since last post, really. My quit is now boring. The nicbitch still whispers in my ear. I still am not going to be fooled by it. Complacency is still the enemy, and I am committed to not become complacent too. I am still dealing with some messy home life situations, and the upshot of all that is that I keep facing things that i would have used as justifications to really ramp up my nicotine consumption in the past. However, I have no interest in using nicotine to deal with that stress now. I guess some reprogramming has been successful, and i'm damned glad.
I continue to get almost daily affirmative reinforcement about how important the network of fellow quitters here is to me. There are bros that have literally helped me through some major shit where I really took a lot of comfort in someone giving a damn enough to reach out. And, I am accountable to them not to use nicotine. Easy enough tradeoff for me.
I still owe a HOF speech, and I'm waiting for the inspiration. Really, HOF has turned out to be no big deal at all to me. But I woudl like to eventually get something down in writing that may help someone else. In the meantime, I"m just stacking +1's, creating lasting connections, and helping others when I can. Also learning how to deal with life in real-time, directly, without the damned poison crutch that really wasn't a crutch.
Been reading today about a guy who wants to stop posting after 200 days. This doesn't make sense to me. I've tried to learn a lot from others, and i'm convinced that things get better and better, but don't get really great until much later in the game than 200 days. More like they really seem to start to open up at a year or so, then really good around 500 to 1000 days. Yet, I've noticed there are funks at almost predictable times along the way even that long quit, and random big craves can creep up any time. I can't imagine walking away so soon as 200 days, and honestly I admire some of the people that have been around for 2years+ that right now I"d like to be helping others like them when I reach that time period.
Well, thats it for now. Damn i'm wordy sometimes. Looking forward to quite a few other quits that I've followed hitting HOF in the next few weeks- that'll be fun!
B
I always look forward to hearing what's going on in that noggin of yours. So I am reassured that you see the importance of staying here and tending your quit. I know when you get around the your official speech it will be something that will strengthen us all (newbies and vets alike) Here' s to lots of boring quit days and even better days to come. Cheers! ;Ironman:
Don't sell your self short bro. The HOF might not seem like a big deal but think about were you were 101 days before that. It is a big deal. I get what you mean though. Technically its just another +1 but it symbolizes something very important. 100 days of freedom.
Im looking forward to reading your HOF speech
PB
I am looking forward to reading your speech Brett. No pressure though. When the inspiration finally hits just make sure to get to a keyboard or dictation device right away. You've been a constant support to a lot of people. You have done this the right way and you should be very proud. Proud to quit with you brother.
Congratulations Brett! You are a great quitter. It does get easier. 1st hundred days, you embraced the suck. I want to read your speech but the speech....most if not all of my quit brothers in the plattoon who said they were waiting to write something....never did and are no longer here.
It may not seem like a big deal. Make it a Bigdeal!
Write a personal declaration of Independence because you know, and showed how to become free!
Tell Nicotine, now with the blinders off, why you resent her. Why you will never never ever surrender to her today. Tell her your strategy for kicking her ass and what a sham and shame she was in your life.
I say do this so you put and exclamation point that you know how to win. Let the nic bitch know that from your vantage point. Its a privlage to hate her. That there is something about fighting nicotine! You grin in your fight. Tell her you're sorry for putting her above the things that you truly value, love and live for. She was a waste of time and your money Just pour out your soul so that you never want to read that declaration with a dip in your mouth. That potential humiliation will only keep you more surely accountable to your quit. We have to keep our guards up and I think the speech is one more keystone to the war on nicotine.
All my opinion because it is going to get easier for a time before you have to face the hurt.
-
Day 121- quitters log. Not much to report, but it has been a while and I feel like I just want to log it in so I can leave it behind.
Not much change in my situation since last post, really. My quit is now boring. The nicbitch still whispers in my ear. I still am not going to be fooled by it. Complacency is still the enemy, and I am committed to not become complacent too. I am still dealing with some messy home life situations, and the upshot of all that is that I keep facing things that i would have used as justifications to really ramp up my nicotine consumption in the past. However, I have no interest in using nicotine to deal with that stress now. I guess some reprogramming has been successful, and i'm damned glad.
I continue to get almost daily affirmative reinforcement about how important the network of fellow quitters here is to me. There are bros that have literally helped me through some major shit where I really took a lot of comfort in someone giving a damn enough to reach out. And, I am accountable to them not to use nicotine. Easy enough tradeoff for me.
I still owe a HOF speech, and I'm waiting for the inspiration. Really, HOF has turned out to be no big deal at all to me. But I woudl like to eventually get something down in writing that may help someone else. In the meantime, I"m just stacking +1's, creating lasting connections, and helping others when I can. Also learning how to deal with life in real-time, directly, without the damned poison crutch that really wasn't a crutch.
Been reading today about a guy who wants to stop posting after 200 days. This doesn't make sense to me. I've tried to learn a lot from others, and i'm convinced that things get better and better, but don't get really great until much later in the game than 200 days. More like they really seem to start to open up at a year or so, then really good around 500 to 1000 days. Yet, I've noticed there are funks at almost predictable times along the way even that long quit, and random big craves can creep up any time. I can't imagine walking away so soon as 200 days, and honestly I admire some of the people that have been around for 2years+ that right now I"d like to be helping others like them when I reach that time period.
Well, thats it for now. Damn i'm wordy sometimes. Looking forward to quite a few other quits that I've followed hitting HOF in the next few weeks- that'll be fun!
Been thinking about some of these things. Re wiring is a serious deal. I'm glad to see there is a light at the tunnel.. The learning curve only gets steeper if you're on ktc.
For one, I would look forward to a speech from you!
Keep stacking those +1s
-
Day 121- quitters log. Not much to report, but it has been a while and I feel like I just want to log it in so I can leave it behind.
Not much change in my situation since last post, really. My quit is now boring. The nicbitch still whispers in my ear. I still am not going to be fooled by it. Complacency is still the enemy, and I am committed to not become complacent too. I am still dealing with some messy home life situations, and the upshot of all that is that I keep facing things that i would have used as justifications to really ramp up my nicotine consumption in the past. However, I have no interest in using nicotine to deal with that stress now. I guess some reprogramming has been successful, and i'm damned glad.
I continue to get almost daily affirmative reinforcement about how important the network of fellow quitters here is to me. There are bros that have literally helped me through some major shit where I really took a lot of comfort in someone giving a damn enough to reach out. And, I am accountable to them not to use nicotine. Easy enough tradeoff for me.
I still owe a HOF speech, and I'm waiting for the inspiration. Really, HOF has turned out to be no big deal at all to me. But I woudl like to eventually get something down in writing that may help someone else. In the meantime, I"m just stacking +1's, creating lasting connections, and helping others when I can. Also learning how to deal with life in real-time, directly, without the damned poison crutch that really wasn't a crutch.
Been reading today about a guy who wants to stop posting after 200 days. This doesn't make sense to me. I've tried to learn a lot from others, and i'm convinced that things get better and better, but don't get really great until much later in the game than 200 days. More like they really seem to start to open up at a year or so, then really good around 500 to 1000 days. Yet, I've noticed there are funks at almost predictable times along the way even that long quit, and random big craves can creep up any time. I can't imagine walking away so soon as 200 days, and honestly I admire some of the people that have been around for 2years+ that right now I"d like to be helping others like them when I reach that time period.
Well, thats it for now. Damn i'm wordy sometimes. Looking forward to quite a few other quits that I've followed hitting HOF in the next few weeks- that'll be fun!
Been thinking about some of these things. Re wiring is a serious deal. I'm glad to see there is a light at the tunnel.. The learning curve only gets steeper if you're on ktc.
For one, I would look forward to a speech from you!
Keep stacking those +1s
Good update Brett. At this point keep posting your promise every day. It serves 3 purposes... Keeps you connected to your network, makes you think about your commitment daily, and (most important as time clicks by) reminds you just a bit every day of where you were and where you are. I'm proud to be on your team - you are killing it. Keep it up, you are about to get to a really good place.
-
Day 121- quitters log. Not much to report, but it has been a while and I feel like I just want to log it in so I can leave it behind.
Not much change in my situation since last post, really. My quit is now boring. The nicbitch still whispers in my ear. I still am not going to be fooled by it. Complacency is still the enemy, and I am committed to not become complacent too. I am still dealing with some messy home life situations, and the upshot of all that is that I keep facing things that i would have used as justifications to really ramp up my nicotine consumption in the past. However, I have no interest in using nicotine to deal with that stress now. I guess some reprogramming has been successful, and i'm damned glad.
I continue to get almost daily affirmative reinforcement about how important the network of fellow quitters here is to me. There are bros that have literally helped me through some major shit where I really took a lot of comfort in someone giving a damn enough to reach out. And, I am accountable to them not to use nicotine. Easy enough tradeoff for me.
I still owe a HOF speech, and I'm waiting for the inspiration. Really, HOF has turned out to be no big deal at all to me. But I woudl like to eventually get something down in writing that may help someone else. In the meantime, I"m just stacking +1's, creating lasting connections, and helping others when I can. Also learning how to deal with life in real-time, directly, without the damned poison crutch that really wasn't a crutch.
Been reading today about a guy who wants to stop posting after 200 days. This doesn't make sense to me. I've tried to learn a lot from others, and i'm convinced that things get better and better, but don't get really great until much later in the game than 200 days. More like they really seem to start to open up at a year or so, then really good around 500 to 1000 days. Yet, I've noticed there are funks at almost predictable times along the way even that long quit, and random big craves can creep up any time. I can't imagine walking away so soon as 200 days, and honestly I admire some of the people that have been around for 2years+ that right now I"d like to be helping others like them when I reach that time period.
Well, thats it for now. Damn i'm wordy sometimes. Looking forward to quite a few other quits that I've followed hitting HOF in the next few weeks- that'll be fun!
Been thinking about some of these things. Re wiring is a serious deal. I'm glad to see there is a light at the tunnel.. The learning curve only gets steeper if you're on ktc.
For one, I would look forward to a speech from you!
Keep stacking those +1s
Good update Brett. At this point keep posting your promise every day. It serves 3 purposes... Keeps you connected to your network, makes you think about your commitment daily, and (most important as time clicks by) reminds you just a bit every day of where you were and where you are. I'm proud to be on your team - you are killing it. Keep it up, you are about to get to a really good place.
You are getting it brother! Learn it, live it, Love it! I too have not as of yet done the whole HOF speech, but I will when I am ready. I still feel unready to be HOF speech worthy, but that is just me. Keep those tools sharp.
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Day 121- quitters log. Not much to report, but it has been a while and I feel like I just want to log it in so I can leave it behind.
Not much change in my situation since last post, really. My quit is now boring. The nicbitch still whispers in my ear. I still am not going to be fooled by it. Complacency is still the enemy, and I am committed to not become complacent too. I am still dealing with some messy home life situations, and the upshot of all that is that I keep facing things that i would have used as justifications to really ramp up my nicotine consumption in the past. However, I have no interest in using nicotine to deal with that stress now. I guess some reprogramming has been successful, and i'm damned glad.
I continue to get almost daily affirmative reinforcement about how important the network of fellow quitters here is to me. There are bros that have literally helped me through some major shit where I really took a lot of comfort in someone giving a damn enough to reach out. And, I am accountable to them not to use nicotine. Easy enough tradeoff for me.
I still owe a HOF speech, and I'm waiting for the inspiration. Really, HOF has turned out to be no big deal at all to me. But I woudl like to eventually get something down in writing that may help someone else. In the meantime, I"m just stacking +1's, creating lasting connections, and helping others when I can. Also learning how to deal with life in real-time, directly, without the damned poison crutch that really wasn't a crutch.
Been reading today about a guy who wants to stop posting after 200 days. This doesn't make sense to me. I've tried to learn a lot from others, and i'm convinced that things get better and better, but don't get really great until much later in the game than 200 days. More like they really seem to start to open up at a year or so, then really good around 500 to 1000 days. Yet, I've noticed there are funks at almost predictable times along the way even that long quit, and random big craves can creep up any time. I can't imagine walking away so soon as 200 days, and honestly I admire some of the people that have been around for 2years+ that right now I"d like to be helping others like them when I reach that time period.
Well, thats it for now. Damn i'm wordy sometimes. Looking forward to quite a few other quits that I've followed hitting HOF in the next few weeks- that'll be fun!
Been thinking about some of these things. Re wiring is a serious deal. I'm glad to see there is a light at the tunnel.. The learning curve only gets steeper if you're on ktc.
For one, I would look forward to a speech from you!
Keep stacking those +1s
Good update Brett. At this point keep posting your promise every day. It serves 3 purposes... Keeps you connected to your network, makes you think about your commitment daily, and (most important as time clicks by) reminds you just a bit every day of where you were and where you are. I'm proud to be on your team - you are killing it. Keep it up, you are about to get to a really good place.
You are getting it brother! Learn it, live it, Love it! I too have not as of yet done the whole HOF speech, but I will when I am ready. I still feel unready to be HOF speech worthy, but that is just me. Keep those tools sharp.
Good stuff brett, I too cannot fathom how one could stop posting after day 200. How many times have we all tried quitting on our own? When you're only accountable to yourself, the guilt of caving is far less severe then when you're accountable to hundreds or thousands. At least that is how I look at it.
Stop futzing around and write that speech. Kidding, all in due process. QLFEDD with you.
-
Day 121- quitters log. Not much to report, but it has been a while and I feel like I just want to log it in so I can leave it behind.
Not much change in my situation since last post, really. My quit is now boring. The nicbitch still whispers in my ear. I still am not going to be fooled by it. Complacency is still the enemy, and I am committed to not become complacent too. I am still dealing with some messy home life situations, and the upshot of all that is that I keep facing things that i would have used as justifications to really ramp up my nicotine consumption in the past. However, I have no interest in using nicotine to deal with that stress now. I guess some reprogramming has been successful, and i'm damned glad.
I continue to get almost daily affirmative reinforcement about how important the network of fellow quitters here is to me. There are bros that have literally helped me through some major shit where I really took a lot of comfort in someone giving a damn enough to reach out. And, I am accountable to them not to use nicotine. Easy enough tradeoff for me.
I still owe a HOF speech, and I'm waiting for the inspiration. Really, HOF has turned out to be no big deal at all to me. But I woudl like to eventually get something down in writing that may help someone else. In the meantime, I"m just stacking +1's, creating lasting connections, and helping others when I can. Also learning how to deal with life in real-time, directly, without the damned poison crutch that really wasn't a crutch.
Been reading today about a guy who wants to stop posting after 200 days. This doesn't make sense to me. I've tried to learn a lot from others, and i'm convinced that things get better and better, but don't get really great until much later in the game than 200 days. More like they really seem to start to open up at a year or so, then really good around 500 to 1000 days. Yet, I've noticed there are funks at almost predictable times along the way even that long quit, and random big craves can creep up any time. I can't imagine walking away so soon as 200 days, and honestly I admire some of the people that have been around for 2years+ that right now I"d like to be helping others like them when I reach that time period.
Well, thats it for now. Damn i'm wordy sometimes. Looking forward to quite a few other quits that I've followed hitting HOF in the next few weeks- that'll be fun!
Been thinking about some of these things. Re wiring is a serious deal. I'm glad to see there is a light at the tunnel.. The learning curve only gets steeper if you're on ktc.
For one, I would look forward to a speech from you!
Keep stacking those +1s
Good update Brett. At this point keep posting your promise every day. It serves 3 purposes... Keeps you connected to your network, makes you think about your commitment daily, and (most important as time clicks by) reminds you just a bit every day of where you were and where you are. I'm proud to be on your team - you are killing it. Keep it up, you are about to get to a really good place.
You are getting it brother! Learn it, live it, Love it! I too have not as of yet done the whole HOF speech, but I will when I am ready. I still feel unready to be HOF speech worthy, but that is just me. Keep those tools sharp.
Good stuff brett, I too cannot fathom how one could stop posting after day 200. How many times have we all tried quitting on our own? When you're only accountable to yourself, the guilt of caving is far less severe then when you're accountable to hundreds or thousands. At least that is how I look at it.
Stop futzing around and write that speech. Kidding, all in due process. QLFEDD with you.
Brett- Don't worry about the HOF speech. I waited until over 500 days to write one, because 100 days just seemed so insignificant to me. There is no endpoint, you have all the time in the world.
Just know that the boring part of quit will change again, you will get sucked back into sharper quit focus by some drama here, some personal life event. Just like most other things you pay attention to daily in you life it will ebb and flow.
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Hey!!!!!...that's a pretty fuckin' cool number you posted today!
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Hey!!!!!...that's a pretty fuckin' cool number you posted today!
'Cheers' nice bro!
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Hey!!!!!...that's a pretty fuckin' cool number you posted today!
'Cheers' nice bro!
'army' Well done. Keep up the fight!
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Hey!!!!!...that's a pretty fuckin' cool number you posted today!
'Cheers' nice bro!
'army' Well done. Keep up the fight!
Thanks guys! The support means so much to me.
-
I ran across this story from a vet quitter about a dance with the nicbitch a full 5+ years out. The quitter ended up winning, because he remembered the suck. This is why I want to stay involved for a long, long time. And the newer quitters going though the suck strongest of all, you all help my quit by helping me remember how much I had to suffer to get my freedom. I did it though, and so can you...
Post is by Ranger 0770 on April 4, 2013 in Oct 2007 HOF class...
"Its been an amazing and long road since June 26, 2007 when I took my last dip. Those first 30 days were terrible. It really only got marginally easier after that, but I was determined. It wasn't until really my 1 year anniversary that I was able to bat away the nicotine demon with relative ease. Since then, I have had my ups and my downs, and yet I have remained strong. Then this week, something clicked in me, a craving so strong that I have experienced it in nearly five years. An overwhelming a desire to take a dip, you know the old "just one." I came so close as to actually buy the can of my old favorite, skoal longcut wintergreen at the 7-11. I'm sitting my car with an old familiarity, striking the can in the palm of my hand to pack it, using my thumbnail to break open the top. I am staring at the can...I open it and smell that old familiar tobacco smell. The demons are callling, "just one...just one...hust one..." Then I think to those awful first days when the physical symptoms were worse than the mental ones. No...no...there can never be "just one." I threw that can and a perfectly good 5 dollars into the trash can in front of the 7-11. A small price to pay to regain my composure. Even after so long nicotine free, that mistress is always calling to you and will always seek to compromise you in your weakest hour. "
-
I ran across this story from a vet quitter about a dance with the nicbitch a full 5+ years out. The quitter ended up winning, because he remembered the suck. This is why I want to stay involved for a long, long time. And the newer quitters going though the suck strongest of all, you all help my quit by helping me remember how much I had to suffer to get my freedom. I did it though, and so can you...
Post is by Ranger 0770 on April 4, 2013 in Oct 2007 HOF class...
"Its been an amazing and long road since June 26, 2007 when I took my last dip. Those first 30 days were terrible. It really only got marginally easier after that, but I was determined. It wasn't until really my 1 year anniversary that I was able to bat away the nicotine demon with relative ease. Since then, I have had my ups and my downs, and yet I have remained strong. Then this week, something clicked in me, a craving so strong that I have experienced it in nearly five years. An overwhelming a desire to take a dip, you know the old "just one." I came so close as to actually buy the can of my old favorite, skoal longcut wintergreen at the 7-11. I'm sitting my car with an old familiarity, striking the can in the palm of my hand to pack it, using my thumbnail to break open the top. I am staring at the can...I open it and smell that old familiar tobacco smell. The demons are callling, "just one...just one...hust one..." Then I think to those awful first days when the physical symptoms were worse than the mental ones. No...no...there can never be "just one." I threw that can and a perfectly good 5 dollars into the trash can in front of the 7-11. A small price to pay to regain my composure. Even after so long nicotine free, that mistress is always calling to you and will always seek to compromise you in your weakest hour. "
Dude, I need to just post til I die. Just like erussrell. Nice nugget Brett.
-
I ran across this story from a vet quitter about a dance with the nicbitch a full 5+ years out. The quitter ended up winning, because he remembered the suck. This is why I want to stay involved for a long, long time. And the newer quitters going though the suck strongest of all, you all help my quit by helping me remember how much I had to suffer to get my freedom. I did it though, and so can you...
Post is by Ranger 0770 on April 4, 2013 in Oct 2007 HOF class...
"Its been an amazing and long road since June 26, 2007 when I took my last dip. Those first 30 days were terrible. It really only got marginally easier after that, but I was determined. It wasn't until really my 1 year anniversary that I was able to bat away the nicotine demon with relative ease. Since then, I have had my ups and my downs, and yet I have remained strong. Then this week, something clicked in me, a craving so strong that I have experienced it in nearly five years. An overwhelming a desire to take a dip, you know the old "just one." I came so close as to actually buy the can of my old favorite, skoal longcut wintergreen at the 7-11. I'm sitting my car with an old familiarity, striking the can in the palm of my hand to pack it, using my thumbnail to break open the top. I am staring at the can...I open it and smell that old familiar tobacco smell. The demons are callling, "just one...just one...hust one..." Then I think to those awful first days when the physical symptoms were worse than the mental ones. No...no...there can never be "just one." I threw that can and a perfectly good 5 dollars into the trash can in front of the 7-11. A small price to pay to regain my composure. Even after so long nicotine free, that mistress is always calling to you and will always seek to compromise you in your weakest hour. "
Dude, I need to just post til I die. Just like erussrell. Nice nugget Brett.
Shit. Talk about walking right to the edge of the cliff and then just turning around. That is some crazy willpower! Yep, I agree with you guys. Post roll till we die. Its the only way.
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I ran across this story from a vet quitter about a dance with the nicbitch a full 5+ years out. The quitter ended up winning, because he remembered the suck. This is why I want to stay involved for a long, long time. And the newer quitters going though the suck strongest of all, you all help my quit by helping me remember how much I had to suffer to get my freedom. I did it though, and so can you...
Post is by Ranger 0770 on April 4, 2013 in Oct 2007 HOF class...
"Its been an amazing and long road since June 26, 2007 when I took my last dip. Those first 30 days were terrible. It really only got marginally easier after that, but I was determined. It wasn't until really my 1 year anniversary that I was able to bat away the nicotine demon with relative ease. Since then, I have had my ups and my downs, and yet I have remained strong. Then this week, something clicked in me, a craving so strong that I have experienced it in nearly five years. An overwhelming a desire to take a dip, you know the old "just one." I came so close as to actually buy the can of my old favorite, skoal longcut wintergreen at the 7-11. I'm sitting my car with an old familiarity, striking the can in the palm of my hand to pack it, using my thumbnail to break open the top. I am staring at the can...I open it and smell that old familiar tobacco smell. The demons are callling, "just one...just one...hust one..." Then I think to those awful first days when the physical symptoms were worse than the mental ones. No...no...there can never be "just one." I threw that can and a perfectly good 5 dollars into the trash can in front of the 7-11. A small price to pay to regain my composure. Even after so long nicotine free, that mistress is always calling to you and will always seek to compromise you in your weakest hour. "
Dude, I need to just post til I die. Just like erussrell. Nice nugget Brett.
Shit. Talk about walking right to the edge of the cliff and then just turning around. That is some crazy willpower! Yep, I agree with you guys. Post roll till we die. Its the only way.
That is a good read. Thanks Brettlees.
Never forget that we are all addicts. That does not go away even though you are quit.
There is no such thing as "just 1" for an addict. You cave and you will be back to your old ways in no time. Read the horror stories of those that gave up their quit.
The path to freedom is all laid out. Post roll EDD and stay quit ODAAT. The only way.
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I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
Brett you have been more of a comfort and help to me than I can express in a post. I am loving following your quit and reading your journal here when I am feeling weak. This is a special community and we are all honored to have you with us. There is an unexplainable power in this brotherhood. Thank God we found this place. Peace!
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
Brett you have been more of a comfort and help to me than I can express in a post. I am loving following your quit and reading your journal here when I am feeling weak. This is a special community and we are all honored to have you with us. There is an unexplainable power in this brotherhood. Thank God we found this place. Peace!
What they said! You've been a welcome voice of encouragement for me from time to time. You're not one of the people I talk with daily, but that's ok. It's actually a welcome reminder that even though we don't talk regularly, you've got my back. Thanks for the support and the inspiration!
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
Brett you have been more of a comfort and help to me than I can express in a post. I am loving following your quit and reading your journal here when I am feeling weak. This is a special community and we are all honored to have you with us. There is an unexplainable power in this brotherhood. Thank God we found this place. Peace!
What they said! You've been a welcome voice of encouragement for me from time to time. You're not one of the people I talk with daily, but that's ok. It's actually a welcome reminder that even though we don't talk regularly, you've got my back. Thanks for the support and the inspiration!
Brett, you're a hell of a quitter. I quit with you every damn day.
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
Brett you have been more of a comfort and help to me than I can express in a post. I am loving following your quit and reading your journal here when I am feeling weak. This is a special community and we are all honored to have you with us. There is an unexplainable power in this brotherhood. Thank God we found this place. Peace!
What they said! You've been a welcome voice of encouragement for me from time to time. You're not one of the people I talk with daily, but that's ok. It's actually a welcome reminder that even though we don't talk regularly, you've got my back. Thanks for the support and the inspiration!
Brett, you're a hell of a quitter. I quit with you every damn day.
Expect unexpected craves and fuck-its during your first trip around the globe. They are normal. One of my funkiest was after HOF during the first part of summer. There was something about a clear, early summer night that just hammered my newly HOFed quit. I had just bought a 12 pack and was sitting in the parking lot and texted Pave about how beautiful the night was.....and within minutes I was getting sexts from Coach Steve, Pave, bird, TJ, Tsthar etc. Looking back, it was one hell of a crave...and it was recognized by my brothers even before me.
Keep up the daily Vigilance.
This place is fucking magical.
*PS - speaking of magical....I have big plans for our Meat Up next week...... 'archer'
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
Brett you have been more of a comfort and help to me than I can express in a post. I am loving following your quit and reading your journal here when I am feeling weak. This is a special community and we are all honored to have you with us. There is an unexplainable power in this brotherhood. Thank God we found this place. Peace!
What they said! You've been a welcome voice of encouragement for me from time to time. You're not one of the people I talk with daily, but that's ok. It's actually a welcome reminder that even though we don't talk regularly, you've got my back. Thanks for the support and the inspiration!
Brett, you're a hell of a quitter. I quit with you every damn day.
Expect unexpected craves and fuck-its during your first trip around the globe. They are normal. One of my funkiest was after HOF during the first part of summer. There was something about a clear, early summer night that just hammered my newly HOFed quit. I had just bought a 12 pack and was sitting in the parking lot and texted Pave about how beautiful the night was.....and within minutes I was getting sexts from Coach Steve, Pave, bird, TJ, Tsthar etc. Looking back, it was one hell of a crave...and it was recognized by my brothers even before me.
Keep up the daily Vigilance.
This place is fucking magical.
*PS - speaking of magical....I have big plans for our Meat Up next week...... 'archer'
Sounds like you better bring grease Brett... 'BanDog' All kidding aside I was in a hurt bag around the time frame of where you are at. I didn't want to do much with the site accept post and go. Even if you can just stay active with texting peeps keep connected she is looking for one to separate from the herd. You are doing great keep it up. we QLF EDD
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
Brett you have been more of a comfort and help to me than I can express in a post. I am loving following your quit and reading your journal here when I am feeling weak. This is a special community and we are all honored to have you with us. There is an unexplainable power in this brotherhood. Thank God we found this place. Peace!
What they said! You've been a welcome voice of encouragement for me from time to time. You're not one of the people I talk with daily, but that's ok. It's actually a welcome reminder that even though we don't talk regularly, you've got my back. Thanks for the support and the inspiration!
Brett, you're a hell of a quitter. I quit with you every damn day.
Expect unexpected craves and fuck-its during your first trip around the globe. They are normal. One of my funkiest was after HOF during the first part of summer. There was something about a clear, early summer night that just hammered my newly HOFed quit. I had just bought a 12 pack and was sitting in the parking lot and texted Pave about how beautiful the night was.....and within minutes I was getting sexts from Coach Steve, Pave, bird, TJ, Tsthar etc. Looking back, it was one hell of a crave...and it was recognized by my brothers even before me.
Keep up the daily Vigilance.
This place is fucking magical.
*PS - speaking of magical....I have big plans for our Meat Up next week...... 'archer'
Sounds like you better bring grease Brett... 'BanDog' All kidding aside I was in a hurt bag around the time frame of where you are at. I didn't want to do much with the site accept post and go. Even if you can just stay active with texting peeps keep connected she is looking for one to separate from the herd. You are doing great keep it up. we QLF EDD
You also have a great opportunity tonight to speak in person about your fuckits. If this shit was easy none of us would need KTC, none of us would need the Accountability, Brotherhood or Commitment. Then none of us would have crossed paths. I am damn glad that you chose to quit. I am here to kick addictions ass right along with you.
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
Brett you have been more of a comfort and help to me than I can express in a post. I am loving following your quit and reading your journal here when I am feeling weak. This is a special community and we are all honored to have you with us. There is an unexplainable power in this brotherhood. Thank God we found this place. Peace!
What they said! You've been a welcome voice of encouragement for me from time to time. You're not one of the people I talk with daily, but that's ok. It's actually a welcome reminder that even though we don't talk regularly, you've got my back. Thanks for the support and the inspiration!
Brett, you're a hell of a quitter. I quit with you every damn day.
Expect unexpected craves and fuck-its during your first trip around the globe. They are normal. One of my funkiest was after HOF during the first part of summer. There was something about a clear, early summer night that just hammered my newly HOFed quit. I had just bought a 12 pack and was sitting in the parking lot and texted Pave about how beautiful the night was.....and within minutes I was getting sexts from Coach Steve, Pave, bird, TJ, Tsthar etc. Looking back, it was one hell of a crave...and it was recognized by my brothers even before me.
Keep up the daily Vigilance.
This place is fucking magical.
*PS - speaking of magical....I have big plans for our Meat Up next week...... 'archer'
Sounds like you better bring grease Brett... 'BanDog' All kidding aside I was in a hurt bag around the time frame of where you are at. I didn't want to do much with the site accept post and go. Even if you can just stay active with texting peeps keep connected she is looking for one to separate from the herd. You are doing great keep it up. we QLF EDD
You also have a great opportunity tonight to speak in person about your fuckits. If this shit was easy none of us would need KTC, none of us would need the Accountability, Brotherhood or Commitment. Then none of us would have crossed paths. I am damn glad that you chose to quit. I am here to kick addictions ass right along with you.
For 12,780 days I regularly poisoned my body and built layers of conditional responses all based on the lies of nicotine. Should I be shocked that every now and then a crave escalates beyond a fleeting thought?
The nic bitch will not sen us her plan of attack of when and how she's going to try to enslave us again. So we hit the floor every damn day and walk our happy 'quit' asses to our posting devices and make our promises. Complacency and isolation are two things you should always fight against as they are the beginning of a very slippery slope.
Note to self.... don't let the good Dr. talk you into 'touring' his lab while you are in OKC...... Danger Danger Will Robinson!
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
Brett you have been more of a comfort and help to me than I can express in a post. I am loving following your quit and reading your journal here when I am feeling weak. This is a special community and we are all honored to have you with us. There is an unexplainable power in this brotherhood. Thank God we found this place. Peace!
What they said! You've been a welcome voice of encouragement for me from time to time. You're not one of the people I talk with daily, but that's ok. It's actually a welcome reminder that even though we don't talk regularly, you've got my back. Thanks for the support and the inspiration!
Brett, you're a hell of a quitter. I quit with you every damn day.
Expect unexpected craves and fuck-its during your first trip around the globe. They are normal. One of my funkiest was after HOF during the first part of summer. There was something about a clear, early summer night that just hammered my newly HOFed quit. I had just bought a 12 pack and was sitting in the parking lot and texted Pave about how beautiful the night was.....and within minutes I was getting sexts from Coach Steve, Pave, bird, TJ, Tsthar etc. Looking back, it was one hell of a crave...and it was recognized by my brothers even before me.
Keep up the daily Vigilance.
This place is fucking magical.
*PS - speaking of magical....I have big plans for our Meat Up next week...... 'archer'
Sounds like you better bring grease Brett... 'BanDog' All kidding aside I was in a hurt bag around the time frame of where you are at. I didn't want to do much with the site accept post and go. Even if you can just stay active with texting peeps keep connected she is looking for one to separate from the herd. You are doing great keep it up. we QLF EDD
You also have a great opportunity tonight to speak in person about your fuckits. If this shit was easy none of us would need KTC, none of us would need the Accountability, Brotherhood or Commitment. Then none of us would have crossed paths. I am damn glad that you chose to quit. I am here to kick addictions ass right along with you.
For 12,780 days I regularly poisoned my body and built layers of conditional responses all based on the lies of nicotine. Should I be shocked that every now and then a crave escalates beyond a fleeting thought?
The nic bitch will not sen us her plan of attack of when and how she's going to try to enslave us again. So we hit the floor every damn day and walk our happy 'quit' asses to our posting devices and make our promises. Complacency and isolation are two things you should always fight against as they are the beginning of a very slippery slope.
Note to self.... don't let the good Dr. talk you into 'touring' his lab while you are in OKC...... Danger Danger Will Robinson!
So long a you keep your accountability checks and make quitting a priority every day you will have no problem kicking nicotines ass every day. You have the tools AND you know how to use them. So there is NO chance of losing today.
Looking forward to having a couple beers and discussing tonight, and I can't echo CBirds warning strongly enough, do not tour Vadge's lab no matter how much he tries to get you in there... 'finger point'
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
Brett you have been more of a comfort and help to me than I can express in a post. I am loving following your quit and reading your journal here when I am feeling weak. This is a special community and we are all honored to have you with us. There is an unexplainable power in this brotherhood. Thank God we found this place. Peace!
What they said! You've been a welcome voice of encouragement for me from time to time. You're not one of the people I talk with daily, but that's ok. It's actually a welcome reminder that even though we don't talk regularly, you've got my back. Thanks for the support and the inspiration!
Brett, you're a hell of a quitter. I quit with you every damn day.
Expect unexpected craves and fuck-its during your first trip around the globe. They are normal. One of my funkiest was after HOF during the first part of summer. There was something about a clear, early summer night that just hammered my newly HOFed quit. I had just bought a 12 pack and was sitting in the parking lot and texted Pave about how beautiful the night was.....and within minutes I was getting sexts from Coach Steve, Pave, bird, TJ, Tsthar etc. Looking back, it was one hell of a crave...and it was recognized by my brothers even before me.
Keep up the daily Vigilance.
This place is fucking magical.
*PS - speaking of magical....I have big plans for our Meat Up next week...... 'archer'
Sounds like you better bring grease Brett... 'BanDog' All kidding aside I was in a hurt bag around the time frame of where you are at. I didn't want to do much with the site accept post and go. Even if you can just stay active with texting peeps keep connected she is looking for one to separate from the herd. You are doing great keep it up. we QLF EDD
You also have a great opportunity tonight to speak in person about your fuckits. If this shit was easy none of us would need KTC, none of us would need the Accountability, Brotherhood or Commitment. Then none of us would have crossed paths. I am damn glad that you chose to quit. I am here to kick addictions ass right along with you.
For 12,780 days I regularly poisoned my body and built layers of conditional responses all based on the lies of nicotine. Should I be shocked that every now and then a crave escalates beyond a fleeting thought?
The nic bitch will not sen us her plan of attack of when and how she's going to try to enslave us again. So we hit the floor every damn day and walk our happy 'quit' asses to our posting devices and make our promises. Complacency and isolation are two things you should always fight against as they are the beginning of a very slippery slope.
Note to self.... don't let the good Dr. talk you into 'touring' his lab while you are in OKC...... Danger Danger Will Robinson!
So long a you keep your accountability checks and make quitting a priority every day you will have no problem kicking nicotines ass every day. You have the tools AND you know how to use them. So there is NO chance of losing today.
Looking forward to having a couple beers and discussing tonight, and I can't echo CBirds warning strongly enough, do not tour Vadge's lab no matter how much he tries to get you in there... 'finger point'
C'mon guys, Vadge says there's magic cream and boobies in there! 'boob' And Hamsters too.
Seriously, anybody looking for wisdom? There are literally YEARS of kick-nicotine's-ass-and-leave-no-trace quit added up together in the people who posted in this little dog pile. Take heed!! you bet I am. This is why this site rocks.
Thanks for the honor of your insights and encouragement! I hope my quit-log (no, not talking quit wood ghey bastards) and what you all give is gonna really hit home for some new quitters-- I continue to be up to kick some nic-bitch-addiction ass all over the place with any of you!
-
I'm at day 176 and just wanted to continue my record for future reference. It's been a while. I don't want to walk this path again, and i want to celebrate the journey as I make it too, so I want to remember how its been.
Mostly, i want to log in that this shit still ain't easy! I remember TCell referring to seasonal triggers, and have seen other references to working through all that. I've been getting triggers left and right lately. It feels like an obstacle course. Many sneak attacks, many dull and slowly building notions of emptyness that i recognize as former triggers too. And little faint "just once" whispers too, on occaision.
I also get bouts of "fuckits" where I just am sort of irritable. Maybe i'm cranky by nature, who knows, and who really cares, i'm free from the chemical addiction now and I love that.
The one thing I can say is that these triggers are handleable. Life is so much better than early-quit. I'm surprised that these are so numerous and fairly strong. I would have listened at some point, in the past. I won't now, and i guess I just have to keep training the nic bitch to fuck off. I'm up for that. I'm pissed thinking about it. The whispers of just once really piss me off-- brings up a fighter instinct, and i'm glad. As ususal, in perspective I'm thankful for the challenges because they ensure that complacency isn't an issue for that day.
What is keeping me quit? Fellowship, brotherhood, and the web of accountabilty/support I have created by following the program here. I owe my life to the bro's who keep in touch with me, who reach out to make a new friend, and to those who documented and shared this path to success. Frickin rocks!
I'm out. Thanks for all the help, and if i can help anyone reading this let me know.
Brett, my friend, you just need look below at your signature and re-read Skoalmonster's words, "To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy, but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom."
I'll gladly pay that price every damn day, and I'll pay it with my roll post. Not only do I get to keep my freedom for that price, I get brotherhood and accountability. Every day I will tell myself that I'm not relinquishing my freedom, brotherhood, and accountability to feed an addiction that leads to one morbid outcome. And every day brother, one day at a time, I will make that promise with you.
Brett you have been more of a comfort and help to me than I can express in a post. I am loving following your quit and reading your journal here when I am feeling weak. This is a special community and we are all honored to have you with us. There is an unexplainable power in this brotherhood. Thank God we found this place. Peace!
What they said! You've been a welcome voice of encouragement for me from time to time. You're not one of the people I talk with daily, but that's ok. It's actually a welcome reminder that even though we don't talk regularly, you've got my back. Thanks for the support and the inspiration!
Brett, you're a hell of a quitter. I quit with you every damn day.
Expect unexpected craves and fuck-its during your first trip around the globe. They are normal. One of my funkiest was after HOF during the first part of summer. There was something about a clear, early summer night that just hammered my newly HOFed quit. I had just bought a 12 pack and was sitting in the parking lot and texted Pave about how beautiful the night was.....and within minutes I was getting sexts from Coach Steve, Pave, bird, TJ, Tsthar etc. Looking back, it was one hell of a crave...and it was recognized by my brothers even before me.
Keep up the daily Vigilance.
This place is fucking magical.
*PS - speaking of magical....I have big plans for our Meat Up next week...... 'archer'
Sounds like you better bring grease Brett... 'BanDog' All kidding aside I was in a hurt bag around the time frame of where you are at. I didn't want to do much with the site accept post and go. Even if you can just stay active with texting peeps keep connected she is looking for one to separate from the herd. You are doing great keep it up. we QLF EDD
You also have a great opportunity tonight to speak in person about your fuckits. If this shit was easy none of us would need KTC, none of us would need the Accountability, Brotherhood or Commitment. Then none of us would have crossed paths. I am damn glad that you chose to quit. I am here to kick addictions ass right along with you.
For 12,780 days I regularly poisoned my body and built layers of conditional responses all based on the lies of nicotine. Should I be shocked that every now and then a crave escalates beyond a fleeting thought?
The nic bitch will not sen us her plan of attack of when and how she's going to try to enslave us again. So we hit the floor every damn day and walk our happy 'quit' asses to our posting devices and make our promises. Complacency and isolation are two things you should always fight against as they are the beginning of a very slippery slope.
Note to self.... don't let the good Dr. talk you into 'touring' his lab while you are in OKC...... Danger Danger Will Robinson!
So long a you keep your accountability checks and make quitting a priority every day you will have no problem kicking nicotines ass every day. You have the tools AND you know how to use them. So there is NO chance of losing today.
Looking forward to having a couple beers and discussing tonight, and I can't echo CBirds warning strongly enough, do not tour Vadge's lab no matter how much he tries to get you in there... 'finger point'
C'mon guys, Vadge says there's magic cream and boobies in there! 'boob' And Hamsters too.
Seriously, anybody looking for wisdom? There are literally YEARS of kick-nicotine's-ass-and-leave-no-trace quit added up together in the people who posted in this little dog pile. Take heed!! you bet I am. This is why this site rocks.
Thanks for the honor of your insights and encouragement! I hope my quit-log (no, not talking quit wood ghey bastards) and what you all give is gonna really hit home for some new quitters-- I continue to be up to kick some nic-bitch-addiction ass all over the place with any of you!
I say it all'a time and sound like a broken record, but it's the bottom line... freedom is VERY damn cool.
Proud of you Brett!
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
Congrats Brett, well done! Keep up that bad ass quit and support!
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
Congrats Brett, well done! Keep up that bad ass quit and support!
'ninja' 'drool'
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
Congrats Brett, well done! Keep up that bad ass quit and support!
'ninja' 'drool'
'BanDog'
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
Congrats Brett, well done! Keep up that bad ass quit and support!
'ninja' 'drool'
'BanDog'
Way to be Brett. Thanks for everything. I love you man!
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
Congrats Brett, well done! Keep up that bad ass quit and support!
'ninja' 'drool'
'BanDog'
Way to be Brett. Thanks for everything. I love you man!
Atta Boy....
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
Congrats Brett, well done! Keep up that bad ass quit and support!
'ninja' 'drool'
'BanDog'
Way to be Brett. Thanks for everything. I love you man!
Atta Boy....
Brett you are the man. Keep kicking ass right here with us brother. Congrats on a lovely deuce!
-
Noticed your milestone on Aug roll call today, 200 days quit is awesome. Congrats for that. 193 to go for me, ODAAT.
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
Congrats Brett, well done! Keep up that bad ass quit and support!
'ninja' 'drool'
'BanDog'
Way to be Brett. Thanks for everything. I love you man!
Atta Boy....
Brett you are the man. Keep kicking ass right here with us brother. Congrats on a lovely deuce!
200 is sweet. One day at a time. More greatness is ahead. Proud as hell to quit with you today, Brett!
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
Congrats Brett, well done! Keep up that bad ass quit and support!
'ninja' 'drool'
'BanDog'
Way to be Brett. Thanks for everything. I love you man!
Atta Boy....
Brett you are the man. Keep kicking ass right here with us brother. Congrats on a lovely deuce!
200 is sweet. One day at a time. More greatness is ahead. Proud as hell to quit with you today, Brett!
Way to go Brett! 200 is awesome! Enjoy the freedom.
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
Congrats Brett, well done! Keep up that bad ass quit and support!
'ninja' 'drool'
'BanDog'
Way to be Brett. Thanks for everything. I love you man!
Atta Boy....
Brett you are the man. Keep kicking ass right here with us brother. Congrats on a lovely deuce!
200 is sweet. One day at a time. More greatness is ahead. Proud as hell to quit with you today, Brett!
Way to go Brett! 200 is awesome! Enjoy the freedom.
'help' yaaa Brett nice second floor keep up to he strong work
-
Welcome to the second floor Bad Ass! Well done sir.
Thanks for the congrats!
I wanted to log a few thoughts.....
At 200 days, i'm struck by two things, both of which relate to intensity. First, i am surprised at how intense the cravings and triggers still can be at times. Some of that may be the situation I've been in recently- will explain below. Second, I am also struck by how intensely WONDERFUL it feels to be quit and free. I never imagined it could feel this good.
This is surely the longest i've ever been without nicotine in decades. I never knew that I could not have "just one" before I really learned about the addiction from this site, and I never had the support before. Those are the keys to my being and staying quit. I'm so greatful!
Today i'm travelling back to home in Colo from my old hometown in S. Dak. It was my first trip back there since I quit. There were triggers-a-plenty, and they were strong as heck! Everywhere! That was where I first chewed, first shared with my grandfather, had/have many cousins and other relatives where I fit in so well as a chewer. This trip, i spent a lot of time with a cousin who kept chewing like a fiend. He knows I quit and it's a big deal to me to be quit. He says that he quits for months at a time, all the time, then can chew for months too, between stops. Maybe he can, i don't know. I do doubt it. I just tell him i sure can't, i'm an addict and I learned I can't even have one. He respects that and doesn't push.
What kept me strong this time was the knowledge i have that I can't have just one, and just knowing I have a strong support and accounabilty network. The thoughts of those of you in the little text group with me, and several others of you (yes, even those of you "behind" me in quit days) who give shouts out to each other, were what gave me strength. In other words, it helped to know I wasn't alone.
In short, I'm loving being free even though it ain't easy, and i'm so greatful for KTC and all of you quitters!
Triggers are nothing, I have had your word for 200 days, fuck triggers. You have been a rock for many a quitter here, I am damn proud to see you hit 200, damn glad to have met you and even more proud to call you a friend and brother.
200 days of badassery! Welcome to the second floor my friend. Proud to quit with you all day long!
Congrats Brett, well done! Keep up that bad ass quit and support!
'ninja' 'drool'
'BanDog'
Way to be Brett. Thanks for everything. I love you man!
Atta Boy....
Brett you are the man. Keep kicking ass right here with us brother. Congrats on a lovely deuce!
200 is sweet. One day at a time. More greatness is ahead. Proud as hell to quit with you today, Brett!
Way to go Brett! 200 is awesome! Enjoy the freedom.
'help' yaaa Brett nice second floor keep up to he strong work
Congrats Brett! Proud to be quit with you and thanks for paving the way.
-
In case somebody got overlooked -- and also because some people aren't used to seeing they have a PM in the new system.....
Theres a Denver area quitter get-together in the works for Thursday evening!! come on over!
For newer quitters, here's a link to the thread where you can reply if you're going---
Denver Area Quitters (http://forum.killthecan.org/topic/1005282/8/#new)
This is a fun and outstanding way to enhance the strength of your quit beyond what you can imagine!
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is.  Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
keep bringing it every damn day. it's amazing all the freedoms we willingly sacrificed to kneel at her feet. a word to the wise, keep your head on a swivel, as the nic bitch likes to change up the point of attack and her disguise
Yes, see how easy life can be when you do not have to worry how to feed an addiction? Well done!
PS
I got stuck in DC once without my can. I was miserable till I got my fix.
I hope that at some point in the rewiring process, my neurons rewire themselves so I do a little better job at noticing errors in my typing! hahahaha! Seriously, sometimes when I see what I wrote, like the above, and see all the typos I cringe! oh well, you all take me as I come here, and for some reason it's really as bad typist sometimes! Can't blame autocorrect either, when I'm not on my phone. But I really don't see all the errors the first time! So be it, I know what I'm saying and it does have value when I look back at where I've been. I noticed the typing was bad early on too- attributed it to fog.
Another good point about DC --- ihatecope told me grizzclaws lives over that way, so I got in touch with grizzclaws and we'll do a get together next time I get out. Looking forward to that, as long as he doesn't want to go fishing!
If any newer quitters aren't aware of the meetup topic forums, CBird explained to me that you can track the topics of a meetup in a particular area, and then if someone comes to that area and posts you'll get a notice that someone posted- and perhaps meet face to face. Thanks Cbird!
Brett, the Potomac is full of snakeheads. I'll get my brother in law's boat. We're goin fishing. I'll buy the sunflower seeds.
Reason to quit number 102: You will make more friends. The nic bitch is selfish she would have us believe that she is our only friend while stabbing us in the back.
LMFAO on the fishing pic. Anyone care to see mike fishing in DC should request a copy of that pic.
I could really relate to your travels. I was on the road this week as well.
The one thing to think about is that you are NO LONGER traveling with the nic B. We used to and she used to dictate our entire trip... Tell us what to do the entire time. No more my friend. You are no longer owned.
Every day you post roll and quit is a day the nic B is not controlling your life. You are dictating your actions and are back in control. She is still trying to nudge her way back... But not today!
This road trip for you was your first solo work trip in a while... Well done!
Proud to be quit with you today brother!
I'm totally ghey for you and your quitsanity!!!!! Keep inspiring by doing the work it takes.
:wub:
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is.  Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
keep bringing it every damn day. it's amazing all the freedoms we willingly sacrificed to kneel at her feet. a word to the wise, keep your head on a swivel, as the nic bitch likes to change up the point of attack and her disguise
Yes, see how easy life can be when you do not have to worry how to feed an addiction? Well done!
PS
I got stuck in DC once without my can. I was miserable till I got my fix.
I hope that at some point in the rewiring process, my neurons rewire themselves so I do a little better job at noticing errors in my typing! hahahaha! Seriously, sometimes when I see what I wrote, like the above, and see all the typos I cringe! oh well, you all take me as I come here, and for some reason it's really as bad typist sometimes! Can't blame autocorrect either, when I'm not on my phone. But I really don't see all the errors the first time! So be it, I know what I'm saying and it does have value when I look back at where I've been. I noticed the typing was bad early on too- attributed it to fog.
Another good point about DC --- ihatecope told me grizzclaws lives over that way, so I got in touch with grizzclaws and we'll do a get together next time I get out. Looking forward to that, as long as he doesn't want to go fishing!
If any newer quitters aren't aware of the meetup topic forums, CBird explained to me that you can track the topics of a meetup in a particular area, and then if someone comes to that area and posts you'll get a notice that someone posted- and perhaps meet face to face. Thanks Cbird!
Brett, the Potomac is full of snakeheads. I'll get my brother in law's boat. We're goin fishing. I'll buy the sunflower seeds.
Reason to quit number 102: You will make more friends. The nic bitch is selfish she would have us believe that she is our only friend while stabbing us in the back.
LMFAO on the fishing pic. Anyone care to see mike fishing in DC should request a copy of that pic.
I could really relate to your travels. I was on the road this week as well.
The one thing to think about is that you are NO LONGER traveling with the nic B. We used to and she used to dictate our entire trip... Tell us what to do the entire time. No more my friend. You are no longer owned.
Every day you post roll and quit is a day the nic B is not controlling your life. You are dictating your actions and are back in control. She is still trying to nudge her way back... But not today!
This road trip for you was your first solo work trip in a while... Well done!
Proud to be quit with you today brother!
I'm totally ghey for you and your quitsanity!!!!! Keep inspiring by doing the work it takes.
:wub:
Quitrageous! thanks!
-
In case somebody got overlooked -- and also because some people aren't used to seeing they have a PM in the new system.....
Theres a Denver area quitter get-together in the works for Thursday evening!! come on over!
For newer quitters, here's a link to the thread where you can reply if you're going---
Denver Area Quitters (http://forum.killthecan.org/topic/1005282/8/#new)
This is a fun and outstanding way to enhance the strength of your quit beyond what you can imagine!
Bringing this back to the bottom.
let's see some more of the classes of 2014 represented too! go to the link above and let us know whether you can make it
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is.  Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
keep bringing it every damn day. it's amazing all the freedoms we willingly sacrificed to kneel at her feet. a word to the wise, keep your head on a swivel, as the nic bitch likes to change up the point of attack and her disguise
Yes, see how easy life can be when you do not have to worry how to feed an addiction? Well done!
PS
I got stuck in DC once without my can. I was miserable till I got my fix.
I hope that at some point in the rewiring process, my neurons rewire themselves so I do a little better job at noticing errors in my typing! hahahaha! Seriously, sometimes when I see what I wrote, like the above, and see all the typos I cringe! oh well, you all take me as I come here, and for some reason it's really as bad typist sometimes! Can't blame autocorrect either, when I'm not on my phone. But I really don't see all the errors the first time! So be it, I know what I'm saying and it does have value when I look back at where I've been. I noticed the typing was bad early on too- attributed it to fog.
Another good point about DC --- ihatecope told me grizzclaws lives over that way, so I got in touch with grizzclaws and we'll do a get together next time I get out. Looking forward to that, as long as he doesn't want to go fishing!
If any newer quitters aren't aware of the meetup topic forums, CBird explained to me that you can track the topics of a meetup in a particular area, and then if someone comes to that area and posts you'll get a notice that someone posted- and perhaps meet face to face. Thanks Cbird!
Brett, the Potomac is full of snakeheads. I'll get my brother in law's boat. We're goin fishing. I'll buy the sunflower seeds.
Reason to quit number 102: You will make more friends. The nic bitch is selfish she would have us believe that she is our only friend while stabbing us in the back.
LMFAO on the fishing pic. Anyone care to see mike fishing in DC should request a copy of that pic.
I could really relate to your travels. I was on the road this week as well.
The one thing to think about is that you are NO LONGER traveling with the nic B. We used to and she used to dictate our entire trip... Tell us what to do the entire time. No more my friend. You are no longer owned.
Every day you post roll and quit is a day the nic B is not controlling your life. You are dictating your actions and are back in control. She is still trying to nudge her way back... But not today!
This road trip for you was your first solo work trip in a while... Well done!
Proud to be quit with you today brother!
I'm totally ghey for you and your quitsanity!!!!! Keep inspiring by doing the work it takes.
:wub:
Quitrageous! thanks!
Grats on the second floor Brett!
-
This week I've been travelling for work, from Tuesday through Friday, in DC. Getting a real quit workout, too! I knew it'd be a challenge.
Used to be: DC was an especially tricky dipping destination when I came here. You usually don't get a car, so transportation is tough. And, it's hard to find supply if you run out or low-- so, I learned the hard way to stock up before coming in. Then, you dress well and stay out of the hotel for a long term, on public transportaiton, going through security to get into buildings-- talk about a ninja challenge! and you have to pack it on your person somewhere, becuase it's not likley to be at a corner store just outside where you are-- there aren't such stores, reliably anyway. And where do you put it- in your suit pocket? What about the metal detectors- can't let others see it by taking it out of the pocket to get through there.... it's a real obstacle course. And, then, how and where do you spit? Nope, gotta maintain a delicate balance of size of dip so that you can swallow, or risk having to spit discretely on a marble floor somewhere or make an emergency run to a bathroom - how about in the Senate office building for example- just so you can spit. And hope there's not a quick spit buildup, so you dont' have to either swallow it and get sick or have to gurgle out a question about where the bathroom is.  Ridiculous, but real. Now, I'm' free of that and it feels like a city dog that got off its leash and is running though the neighborhood just because it feels good to be free!
Also, though, the triggers are pretty deep and that means I've been running a gauntlet of craves. That means I"m winning a lot though, because i'm smacking the bitch back whenever she raisees her ugly head. I"m thinking the triggers are strong because they had to be, in order to overcome the terrible inconvenience dipping is here. The addiction had to make sure I knew damned well i'd better keep the supply coming, even though it was very hard and complicated to do that.
The travelling part is interesting. You are essentially alone when travelling. That means lots of alone time with the nicbitch keeping you company. She loves travelling, despite the inconvenience, and she just ramps up the triggers to accomodate the inconveniences, like i desribed earlier. However, recall that the addiction means that she takes over the brain circuitry that makes you want to make friends. It does feel very different with that circuitry in myself coming into a state of being nicotine free. I actually enjoy and find myself having more, pleasurable, interactions all along my travels. I still have habits of keeping to myself, but i'm finding that it's more fun to not keep to myself, to reach out to fellow travelers and other people I meet and actually engage with them. What the $*^#*, i've always aspired to that but felt shy in some ways and that held be back. And I battled it but never felt free. No damned wonder, I find now, since my brain chemistry has been hijacked all this time and I was incabable of healthy free relating with people .
So glad to be free from the shit. So glad to be growing up again after the shit worked its way into my brain. So f-ing thankful that I have this opportunity to live. And it's just starting.
keep bringing it every damn day. it's amazing all the freedoms we willingly sacrificed to kneel at her feet. a word to the wise, keep your head on a swivel, as the nic bitch likes to change up the point of attack and her disguise
Yes, see how easy life can be when you do not have to worry how to feed an addiction? Well done!
PS
I got stuck in DC once without my can. I was miserable till I got my fix.
I hope that at some point in the rewiring process, my neurons rewire themselves so I do a little better job at noticing errors in my typing! hahahaha! Seriously, sometimes when I see what I wrote, like the above, and see all the typos I cringe! oh well, you all take me as I come here, and for some reason it's really as bad typist sometimes! Can't blame autocorrect either, when I'm not on my phone. But I really don't see all the errors the first time! So be it, I know what I'm saying and it does have value when I look back at where I've been. I noticed the typing was bad early on too- attributed it to fog.
Another good point about DC --- ihatecope told me grizzclaws lives over that way, so I got in touch with grizzclaws and we'll do a get together next time I get out. Looking forward to that, as long as he doesn't want to go fishing!
If any newer quitters aren't aware of the meetup topic forums, CBird explained to me that you can track the topics of a meetup in a particular area, and then if someone comes to that area and posts you'll get a notice that someone posted- and perhaps meet face to face. Thanks Cbird!
Brett, the Potomac is full of snakeheads. I'll get my brother in law's boat. We're goin fishing. I'll buy the sunflower seeds.
Reason to quit number 102: You will make more friends. The nic bitch is selfish she would have us believe that she is our only friend while stabbing us in the back.
LMFAO on the fishing pic. Anyone care to see mike fishing in DC should request a copy of that pic.
I could really relate to your travels. I was on the road this week as well.
The one thing to think about is that you are NO LONGER traveling with the nic B. We used to and she used to dictate our entire trip... Tell us what to do the entire time. No more my friend. You are no longer owned.
Every day you post roll and quit is a day the nic B is not controlling your life. You are dictating your actions and are back in control. She is still trying to nudge her way back... But not today!
This road trip for you was your first solo work trip in a while... Well done!
Proud to be quit with you today brother!
I'm totally ghey for you and your quitsanity!!!!! Keep inspiring by doing the work it takes.
:wub:
Quitrageous! thanks!
Grats on the second floor Brett!
you're up next buddy! Time's flying!
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
Amen. I remember those days and I don't want to go back to those days either. Nice just to deal with the 1 problem and not having a larger concern rolling around in your head. Quit with you all day brother!
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
Amen. I remember those days and I don't want to go back to those days either. Nice just to deal with the 1 problem and not having a larger concern rolling around in your head. Quit with you all day brother!
True 'dat! Freedom feels good!!!!
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
Amen. I remember those days and I don't want to go back to those days either. Nice just to deal with the 1 problem and not having a larger concern rolling around in your head. Quit with you all day brother!
True 'dat! Freedom feels good!!!!
True words...Quit with you.
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
Amen. I remember those days and I don't want to go back to those days either. Nice just to deal with the 1 problem and not having a larger concern rolling around in your head. Quit with you all day brother!
True 'dat! Freedom feels good!!!!
True words...Quit with you.
QLF with you EDD Brett!
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
Amen. I remember those days and I don't want to go back to those days either. Nice just to deal with the 1 problem and not having a larger concern rolling around in your head. Quit with you all day brother!
True 'dat! Freedom feels good!!!!
True words...Quit with you.
QLF with you EDD Brett!
Great post. I can remember days I'd get sick, have a sore throat, and be worried about throat cancer, with a dip in!
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
Amen. I remember those days and I don't want to go back to those days either. Nice just to deal with the 1 problem and not having a larger concern rolling around in your head. Quit with you all day brother!
True 'dat! Freedom feels good!!!!
True words...Quit with you.
QLF with you EDD Brett!
Great post. I can remember days I'd get sick, have a sore throat, and be worried about throat cancer, with a dip in!
Quit on brother Brett!
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
Amen. I remember those days and I don't want to go back to those days either. Nice just to deal with the 1 problem and not having a larger concern rolling around in your head. Quit with you all day brother!
True 'dat! Freedom feels good!!!!
True words...Quit with you.
QLF with you EDD Brett!
Great post. I can remember days I'd get sick, have a sore throat, and be worried about throat cancer, with a dip in!
Quit on brother Brett!
Amen, Brother.
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
Amen. I remember those days and I don't want to go back to those days either. Nice just to deal with the 1 problem and not having a larger concern rolling around in your head. Quit with you all day brother!
True 'dat! Freedom feels good!!!!
True words...Quit with you.
QLF with you EDD Brett!
Great post. I can remember days I'd get sick, have a sore throat, and be worried about throat cancer, with a dip in!
Quit on brother Brett!
Amen, Brother.
Truer words have never been spoken! QLF today with you brett!
-
It's always an honor to meet men of integrity who get life... Who enjoy life... Who live a good life. It just rings out of their speech and mannerisms. You know their life isn't perfect but they dont use it as an excuse of any sort... that's what makes it all the more real and satisfying to know such a dude. My pleasure to have met you and hung out a li'l bit yesterday brother. Made my quit solid... Not just for that day but in general. We come from different places but... We're just men at the core. Living and fighting the same general battles.
Quit on m'man... I'll be right there with ya!
-
Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
Amen. I remember those days and I don't want to go back to those days either. Nice just to deal with the 1 problem and not having a larger concern rolling around in your head. Quit with you all day brother!
True 'dat! Freedom feels good!!!!
True words...Quit with you.
QLF with you EDD Brett!
Great post. I can remember days I'd get sick, have a sore throat, and be worried about throat cancer, with a dip in!
Quit on brother Brett!
Amen, Brother.
Truer words have never been spoken! QLF today with you brett!
Freedom. It's a beautiful thing. I'm quit with you pal.
-
Great post in Loots thread. I could not agree more. I agree with most of what Loot is saying however the "INTRO" section is NOT the place for that type of dissent. His judgment stinks and I believe he has harmed or potentially harmed young quits. And for that I am pissed.
Quit on. Ryan
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Great post in Loots thread. I could not agree more. I agree with most of what Loot is saying however the "INTRO" section is NOT the place for that type of dissent. His judgment stinks and I believe he has harmed or potentially harmed young quits. And for that I am pissed.
Quit on. Ryan
Yep, would like to see it moved as well. Off the main page, anywhere but intros. . Still sucks for Sept even though wastepanel is stepping in.
BTW, both of you had good posts, Ryan's was in EW intro.
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Just a little thing i wanted to post. No need for support or anything, just want to share something nice.
I have a cold or allergies. Pretty bad post-nasal, making my throat raw and sore, coughing a bit. It's SO DAMNED NICE that I know that this is not finally cancer hitting me, it is not because i have been dipping and swallowing too much and i've made my throat sore. I just have a little cold or allergies. I can just relax, take care of myself and it will go away. I don't have to plan to go the doctor if it doesn't go away in x days. I don't have to fear biopsies and probes and tracheotomies and the rest. I can just relax and get better, consider changing up my diet and/or pop some allergy meds. WHAT A RELIEF that i NEVER EXPECTED!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks!
FUCK! LIFE IS GREAT WHEN YOU DON"T CHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
True, True, True. I love seeing you celebrate being free. I'm with you, I'm terrified of "probes"
Amen. I remember those days and I don't want to go back to those days either. Nice just to deal with the 1 problem and not having a larger concern rolling around in your head. Quit with you all day brother!
True 'dat! Freedom feels good!!!!
True words...Quit with you.
QLF with you EDD Brett!
Great post. I can remember days I'd get sick, have a sore throat, and be worried about throat cancer, with a dip in!
Quit on brother Brett!
Amen, Brother.
Truer words have never been spoken! QLF today with you brett!
Freedom. It's a beautiful thing. I'm quit with you pal.
Love this Brett! Freedom feels amazing. Each time I have a moment like you described I smile and think that this fight is so worth it.
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
3 hundo brother, way to get it done!
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
Nice 3 bills. Only thing better is 3 bills +1.
Quit on...
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
Nice 3 bills. Only thing better is 3 bills +1.
Quit on...
Great job Brett, proud to quit with you!
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
Nice 3 bills. Only thing better is 3 bills +1.
Quit on...
Great job Brett, proud to quit with you!
Way to be Brett. You have come so far and I have enjoyed sharing your journey with you. You have been a HUGE help to me. Enjoy today Brother. The really big day is just around the bend!
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
Nice 3 bills. Only thing better is 3 bills +1.
Quit on...
Great job Brett, proud to quit with you!
Way to be Brett. You have come so far and I have enjoyed sharing your journey with you. You have been a HUGE help to me. Enjoy today Brother. The really big day is just around the bend!
Congrats brett, 300 is big stuff.
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
Nice 3 bills. Only thing better is 3 bills +1.
Quit on...
Great job Brett, proud to quit with you!
Way to be Brett. You have come so far and I have enjoyed sharing your journey with you. You have been a HUGE help to me. Enjoy today Brother. The really big day is just around the bend!
Congrats brett, 300 is big stuff.
Congrats on 3 hundred! Enjoy today!!
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
Nice 3 bills. Only thing better is 3 bills +1.
Quit on...
Great job Brett, proud to quit with you!
Way to be Brett. You have come so far and I have enjoyed sharing your journey with you. You have been a HUGE help to me. Enjoy today Brother. The really big day is just around the bend!
Congrats brett, 300 is big stuff.
Congrats on 3 hundred! Enjoy today!!
CONGRATS, Brett!!! Damn exciting and inspiring! Loving everything you stand for. Quit with you today, my friend! 'Cheers' 'Sing and Drink' 'band' 'dance'
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
Nice 3 bills. Only thing better is 3 bills +1.
Quit on...
Great job Brett, proud to quit with you!
Way to be Brett. You have come so far and I have enjoyed sharing your journey with you. You have been a HUGE help to me. Enjoy today Brother. The really big day is just around the bend!
Congrats brett, 300 is big stuff.
Congrats on 3 hundred! Enjoy today!!
CONGRATS, Brett!!! Damn exciting and inspiring! Loving everything you stand for. Quit with you today, my friend! 'Cheers' 'Sing and Drink' 'band' 'dance'
Day late but congrats on 300. Just noticed your 301 on roll today.
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
Nice 3 bills. Only thing better is 3 bills +1.
Quit on...
Great job Brett, proud to quit with you!
Way to be Brett. You have come so far and I have enjoyed sharing your journey with you. You have been a HUGE help to me. Enjoy today Brother. The really big day is just around the bend!
Congrats brett, 300 is big stuff.
Congrats on 3 hundred! Enjoy today!!
CONGRATS, Brett!!! Damn exciting and inspiring! Loving everything you stand for. Quit with you today, my friend! 'Cheers' 'Sing and Drink' 'band' 'dance'
Day late but congrats on 300. Just noticed your 301 on roll today.
Congrats on 300! Reading through your intro has been very helpful! You old time quitters are an inspiration to a noob quitter like me!
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
Nice 3 bills. Only thing better is 3 bills +1.
Quit on...
Great job Brett, proud to quit with you!
Way to be Brett. You have come so far and I have enjoyed sharing your journey with you. You have been a HUGE help to me. Enjoy today Brother. The really big day is just around the bend!
Congrats brett, 300 is big stuff.
Congrats on 3 hundred! Enjoy today!!
CONGRATS, Brett!!! Damn exciting and inspiring! Loving everything you stand for. Quit with you today, my friend! 'Cheers' 'Sing and Drink' 'band' 'dance'
Day late but congrats on 300. Just noticed your 301 on roll today.
Congrats on 300! Reading through your intro has been very helpful! You old time quitters are an inspiration to a noob quitter like me!
Hey Brotha, do you know what's better than 300 ? 301 !!! Congrats bro. I have certainly enjoyed Quitting with you. Your doing it right.
-
This day and yesterday have been deusies. Deep cravings at times, fog almost all the time. I want to eat everything, and nothing satisifies. So foggy at work that nothing worthwhile is getting done, and i feel like I'd be better off taking leave. I"m crabby as heck at home and elsewhere, but doing my best to not make my family suffer, or to give in to road rage and have worse consequences. I also feel the sense of loss at times- feels like grief. Good! Maybe that means i'm processing the loss/finality of it all.
For the last week , I wake up around 3 am and don't go back to sleep. Sucks! Right now, this feels like it won't end and I"m weary of it all. It is helping me to read about others feeling the same stuff, and about those who have made it through. This fog, especially, has been so relentless that I feel like it might not ever leave. So it helps to read that it's normal and that it will leave sometime. Makes me want to hang on and ride through it.
I may not work tomorrow but will still try and post role. Not sure how to make the weekend if I am not on computer. Text someone? Feel free to PM if you have a suggestion on that.
Thanks all!
Remember this??? Never, ever again Brett!
Welcome to the 3rd floor! Congratulations and thank you for all that you do for this site!
300 is awesome! B.A.Q. for sure! Enjoy your day brother.
Congratulations on Your 3rd floor....gets much gooder here on up...I promise.
ODAAT and NAFAR
Brett, congrats on 300 today. You are my brother in quit and a great friend indeed.
Congrats Brett! Truly one of the baddest badasses of quit
Outstanding job brother! Enjoy your badass se'f today!
Nice 3 bills. Only thing better is 3 bills +1.
Quit on...
Great job Brett, proud to quit with you!
Way to be Brett. You have come so far and I have enjoyed sharing your journey with you. You have been a HUGE help to me. Enjoy today Brother. The really big day is just around the bend!
Congrats brett, 300 is big stuff.
Congrats on 3 hundred! Enjoy today!!
CONGRATS, Brett!!! Damn exciting and inspiring! Loving everything you stand for. Quit with you today, my friend! 'Cheers' 'Sing and Drink' 'band' 'dance'
Day late but congrats on 300. Just noticed your 301 on roll today.
Congrats on 300! Reading through your intro has been very helpful! You old time quitters are an inspiration to a noob quitter like me!
Hey Brotha, do you know what's better than 300 ? 301 !!! Congrats bro. I have certainly enjoyed Quitting with you. Your doing it right.
Wow I really want to thank each person who congratulated me on 300-- here and in pms and texts! The think about the milestones I notice is that they are just another day in terms of my quit, but they are an opportunity to really enjoy a feeling of support, and you all really gave me that and I appreciate it immensely. Really humbled and greatful.
I want to say to new quitters that one day at a time works- they just keep stacking up. It's the only way, really. You develop networks, skills, and alternative behaviors early in your quit, then you just keep using them to train yourself to live a clean life. The craves still come for me, but i get through them. There are even funks, but they are not like the early days-- not nearly so hard. Overall, it just keeps getting better and better being free. It's important to notice how much better it feels, many times along the way. Man, my early days of quit REALLY sucked, but i got through them one day at a time. You can too. Really. Just try it for today, then worry about tomorrow later. Never forget those early days, that's what "just one" leads to every time. Quit on!
-
Just to have it down, for my reference and others who might come across this, here's a gem of knowldege. I think this will help a lot of new quitters, and it still helps me at day 303. Ron Cross was reflecting on some insight from a recent cave. He made a list of 4 lessons. Then Skoal Monster added on. The resulting list is a treasure....
"I learn so much for these caves! The reasons and circumstances all seem to repeat for so many people.
1. Failure to learn the basics of quit 101 will most certainly lead to a cave later on.
2. One problem + nicotine = two problems.
3. Alcohol is the biggest quit killer out there.
4. Failure to continue to post your promise every day whether you are 100 days quit or 1,000 days quit is a recipe for a cave.
5. length of quit is not related to strength of quit.
6. This is Chess.... not checkers, educate yourself
7. There is no just one.....ever
8. You are an addict.... no different than a heroin junkie
9. you will always be an addict
10. 100% of quitters that don't put nicotine in their body quit successfully
11. It's going to suck.......... until it doesn't..............and then it won't
And when the fog lifts and you understand how easy this quitting business really is you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner. It's so simple. Embrace the suck, just give in to the fact that your going to suffer for awhile. It won't kill you despite what you think. A small amount of suffering is a reasonable price to pay to save your life I think? What about you?"
-
Just to have it down, for my reference and others who might come across this, here's a gem of knowldege. I think this will help a lot of new quitters, and it still helps me at day 303. Ron Cross was reflecting on some insight from a recent cave. He made a list of 4 lessons. Then Skoal Monster added on. The resulting list is a treasure....
"I learn so much for these caves! The reasons and circumstances all seem to repeat for so many people.
1. Failure to learn the basics of quit 101 will most certainly lead to a cave later on.
2. One problem + nicotine = two problems.
3. Alcohol is the biggest quit killer out there.
4. Failure to continue to post your promise every day whether you are 100 days quit or 1,000 days quit is a recipe for a cave.
5. length of quit is not related to strength of quit.
6. This is Chess.... not checkers, educate yourself
7. There is no just one.....ever
8. You are an addict.... no different than a heroin junkie
9. you will always be an addict
10. 100% of quitters that don't put nicotine in their body quit successfully
11. It's going to suck.......... until it doesn't..............and then it won't
And when the fog lifts and you understand how easy this quitting business really is you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner. It's so simple. Embrace the suck, just give in to the fact that your going to suffer for awhile. It won't kill you despite what you think. A small amount of suffering is a reasonable price to pay to save your life I think? What about you?"
 
Number 11 got me through some very rough times
Followed by 7 and 5
stay strong Brett
-
my HOF finally went in today- day 358. So, i'm a little slow! I savor it better that way! Thank you all who have helped me over the past 11+ months.
Integrity- Requires Being All In
I’ve been quit almost a year. I’ve learned a lot here. There are so many times I would have started again, starting by having “just one” for whatever lame reason I’d dream up. But not now, I understand addiction more because of this site, and because of sticking around to see how others do it, as well as how others fail.
Want to know the real secret? You have to be involved. You have to put yourself out there. Post roll here, and more. Post your experiences. Support other quitters. Get to know other quitters. The more you do here, the more likely you will succeed. ItÂ’s this social aspect, once you really understand the addiction, that makes it work. For years, for many of, chew was your secret best friend, always there with you and for you. Or so the addiction made you think. Now you have to have a replacement - real quitters as friends and supporters and enforcers if you were to slip are just the ticket.
Find the involvement that helps you the most. When I started my quit I avoided text groups, but by now a small daily text group I’m in is clearly the thing that means the absolute most to maintaining my quit daily. I do continue to post though, religiously. I also stay involved here, and you really should do that too. You have to put yourself out there—be you, be all in. You’ll make great bonds. Some guys here will be great friends. Some guys here are supreme assholes, some are heroes. It’s a mirror of life, it is what it is. But what is it mostly the opportunity to do something you have never done before, and something few ever can- the opportunity to stop feeding your nicotine addiction successfully, and if you choose, the opportunity to actually start healing from that addiction and whatever created it in you.
Finally, I want to discuss healing just a little more, because if you are so inclined, you are about to embark on some amazing growth. The part I notice first is how good it feels to be in real integrity. I no longer have this dirty little secret about my chewing, or the shame of doing something that others vocally express is very gross to them. I am free of that burden. I never realized it was such a burden before, when I was using- but then again, a fish doesn’t really know it’s in water. It feels so good to be free, and one of those great feelings I’m still getting used to after all this quit so far is that I DON’T have that little secret any more—I’m not living a lie anymore. I am honest, not a liar, and am a person I always wanted to be, not someone with a dirty lie ruling my life beyond where most can see. To be a man of integrity has always been a principle of mine, though I always lived with a big lie and in constant efforts to deceive others- hiding chew and spit and cans and making sure my teeth appeared clean and not breathing on people so they couldn’t smell the chew, and so on. Now, I don’t have to be in constant “deceive” mode. It’s taken a long time but I am about free of that habitual inclination- and it feels great! And I can tell there is so much more to discover and enjoy about being free. You’ll find along this journey that it just keeps getting better and better as you go. There are ups and downs, and it’s hard, but you can do it following the methods here. Your life will be better in ways you never even imagined- I know because mine already is, and I’m just starting!
To conclude, there are so many people IÂ’d love to thank. Most are still around, others have left for various reasons. I seriously think about each of you who has interacted with me in intros or PMs or texts, or signed in with support in our Jan 14 class, or met with me in person. I canÂ’t list everyone, and there are new ones to come IÂ’m sure. Just know that the fellowship is what really makes it work for me and I sincerely thank you for helping me chose to live a clean and honest and free life every day, after decades of lies deceit and slavery to an evil addiction to a deadly weed of a plant.
-
my HOF finally went in today- day 358. So, i'm a little slow! I savor it better that way! Thank you all who have helped me over the past 11+ months.
Integrity- Requires Being All In
I’ve been quit almost a year. I’ve learned a lot here. There are so many times I would have started again, starting by having “just one” for whatever lame reason I’d dream up. But not now, I understand addiction more because of this site, and because of sticking around to see how others do it, as well as how others fail.
Want to know the real secret? You have to be involved. You have to put yourself out there. Post roll here, and more. Post your experiences. Support other quitters. Get to know other quitters. The more you do here, the more likely you will succeed. ItÂ’s this social aspect, once you really understand the addiction, that makes it work. For years, for many of, chew was your secret best friend, always there with you and for you. Or so the addiction made you think. Now you have to have a replacement - real quitters as friends and supporters and enforcers if you were to slip are just the ticket.
Find the involvement that helps you the most. When I started my quit I avoided text groups, but by now a small daily text group I’m in is clearly the thing that means the absolute most to maintaining my quit daily. I do continue to post though, religiously. I also stay involved here, and you really should do that too. You have to put yourself out there—be you, be all in. You’ll make great bonds. Some guys here will be great friends. Some guys here are supreme assholes, some are heroes. It’s a mirror of life, it is what it is. But what is it mostly the opportunity to do something you have never done before, and something few ever can- the opportunity to stop feeding your nicotine addiction successfully, and if you choose, the opportunity to actually start healing from that addiction and whatever created it in you.
Finally, I want to discuss healing just a little more, because if you are so inclined, you are about to embark on some amazing growth. The part I notice first is how good it feels to be in real integrity. I no longer have this dirty little secret about my chewing, or the shame of doing something that others vocally express is very gross to them. I am free of that burden. I never realized it was such a burden before, when I was using- but then again, a fish doesn’t really know it’s in water. It feels so good to be free, and one of those great feelings I’m still getting used to after all this quit so far is that I DON’T have that little secret any more—I’m not living a lie anymore. I am honest, not a liar, and am a person I always wanted to be, not someone with a dirty lie ruling my life beyond where most can see. To be a man of integrity has always been a principle of mine, though I always lived with a big lie and in constant efforts to deceive others- hiding chew and spit and cans and making sure my teeth appeared clean and not breathing on people so they couldn’t smell the chew, and so on. Now, I don’t have to be in constant “deceive” mode. It’s taken a long time but I am about free of that habitual inclination- and it feels great! And I can tell there is so much more to discover and enjoy about being free. You’ll find along this journey that it just keeps getting better and better as you go. There are ups and downs, and it’s hard, but you can do it following the methods here. Your life will be better in ways you never even imagined- I know because mine already is, and I’m just starting!
To conclude, there are so many people IÂ’d love to thank. Most are still around, others have left for various reasons. I seriously think about each of you who has interacted with me in intros or PMs or texts, or signed in with support in our Jan 14 class, or met with me in person. I canÂ’t list everyone, and there are new ones to come IÂ’m sure. Just know that the fellowship is what really makes it work for me and I sincerely thank you for helping me chose to live a clean and honest and free life every day, after decades of lies deceit and slavery to an evil addiction to a deadly weed of a plant.
Damn good read there Brett. Your story sounds just like mine. Deceit over honor. What a damn joke we were BUT now look at you. Clean for almost a year now. GREAT JOB you are doing but you are not finished yet. Still a lot of work to do.
-
my HOF finally went in today- day 358. So, i'm a little slow! I savor it better that way! Thank you all who have helped me over the past 11+ months.
Integrity- Requires Being All In
I’ve been quit almost a year. I’ve learned a lot here. There are so many times I would have started again, starting by having “just one” for whatever lame reason I’d dream up. But not now, I understand addiction more because of this site, and because of sticking around to see how others do it, as well as how others fail.
Want to know the real secret? You have to be involved. You have to put yourself out there. Post roll here, and more. Post your experiences. Support other quitters. Get to know other quitters. The more you do here, the more likely you will succeed. ItÂ’s this social aspect, once you really understand the addiction, that makes it work. For years, for many of, chew was your secret best friend, always there with you and for you. Or so the addiction made you think. Now you have to have a replacement - real quitters as friends and supporters and enforcers if you were to slip are just the ticket.
Find the involvement that helps you the most. When I started my quit I avoided text groups, but by now a small daily text group I’m in is clearly the thing that means the absolute most to maintaining my quit daily. I do continue to post though, religiously. I also stay involved here, and you really should do that too. You have to put yourself out there—be you, be all in. You’ll make great bonds. Some guys here will be great friends. Some guys here are supreme assholes, some are heroes. It’s a mirror of life, it is what it is. But what is it mostly the opportunity to do something you have never done before, and something few ever can- the opportunity to stop feeding your nicotine addiction successfully, and if you choose, the opportunity to actually start healing from that addiction and whatever created it in you.
Finally, I want to discuss healing just a little more, because if you are so inclined, you are about to embark on some amazing growth. The part I notice first is how good it feels to be in real integrity. I no longer have this dirty little secret about my chewing, or the shame of doing something that others vocally express is very gross to them. I am free of that burden. I never realized it was such a burden before, when I was using- but then again, a fish doesn’t really know it’s in water. It feels so good to be free, and one of those great feelings I’m still getting used to after all this quit so far is that I DON’T have that little secret any more—I’m not living a lie anymore. I am honest, not a liar, and am a person I always wanted to be, not someone with a dirty lie ruling my life beyond where most can see. To be a man of integrity has always been a principle of mine, though I always lived with a big lie and in constant efforts to deceive others- hiding chew and spit and cans and making sure my teeth appeared clean and not breathing on people so they couldn’t smell the chew, and so on. Now, I don’t have to be in constant “deceive” mode. It’s taken a long time but I am about free of that habitual inclination- and it feels great! And I can tell there is so much more to discover and enjoy about being free. You’ll find along this journey that it just keeps getting better and better as you go. There are ups and downs, and it’s hard, but you can do it following the methods here. Your life will be better in ways you never even imagined- I know because mine already is, and I’m just starting!
To conclude, there are so many people IÂ’d love to thank. Most are still around, others have left for various reasons. I seriously think about each of you who has interacted with me in intros or PMs or texts, or signed in with support in our Jan 14 class, or met with me in person. I canÂ’t list everyone, and there are new ones to come IÂ’m sure. Just know that the fellowship is what really makes it work for me and I sincerely thank you for helping me chose to live a clean and honest and free life every day, after decades of lies deceit and slavery to an evil addiction to a deadly weed of a plant.
Damn good read there Brett. Your story sounds just like mine. Deceit over honor. What a damn joke we were BUT now look at you. Clean for almost a year now. GREAT JOB you are doing but you are not finished yet. Still a lot of work to do.
Good stuff. Thanks for writing and sharing it.
-
my HOF finally went in today- day 358. So, i'm a little slow! I savor it better that way! Thank you all who have helped me over the past 11+ months.
Integrity- Requires Being All In
I’ve been quit almost a year. I’ve learned a lot here. There are so many times I would have started again, starting by having “just one” for whatever lame reason I’d dream up. But not now, I understand addiction more because of this site, and because of sticking around to see how others do it, as well as how others fail.
Want to know the real secret? You have to be involved. You have to put yourself out there. Post roll here, and more. Post your experiences. Support other quitters. Get to know other quitters. The more you do here, the more likely you will succeed. ItÂ’s this social aspect, once you really understand the addiction, that makes it work. For years, for many of, chew was your secret best friend, always there with you and for you. Or so the addiction made you think. Now you have to have a replacement - real quitters as friends and supporters and enforcers if you were to slip are just the ticket.
Find the involvement that helps you the most. When I started my quit I avoided text groups, but by now a small daily text group I’m in is clearly the thing that means the absolute most to maintaining my quit daily. I do continue to post though, religiously. I also stay involved here, and you really should do that too. You have to put yourself out there—be you, be all in. You’ll make great bonds. Some guys here will be great friends. Some guys here are supreme assholes, some are heroes. It’s a mirror of life, it is what it is. But what is it mostly the opportunity to do something you have never done before, and something few ever can- the opportunity to stop feeding your nicotine addiction successfully, and if you choose, the opportunity to actually start healing from that addiction and whatever created it in you.
Finally, I want to discuss healing just a little more, because if you are so inclined, you are about to embark on some amazing growth. The part I notice first is how good it feels to be in real integrity. I no longer have this dirty little secret about my chewing, or the shame of doing something that others vocally express is very gross to them. I am free of that burden. I never realized it was such a burden before, when I was using- but then again, a fish doesn’t really know it’s in water. It feels so good to be free, and one of those great feelings I’m still getting used to after all this quit so far is that I DON’T have that little secret any more—I’m not living a lie anymore. I am honest, not a liar, and am a person I always wanted to be, not someone with a dirty lie ruling my life beyond where most can see. To be a man of integrity has always been a principle of mine, though I always lived with a big lie and in constant efforts to deceive others- hiding chew and spit and cans and making sure my teeth appeared clean and not breathing on people so they couldn’t smell the chew, and so on. Now, I don’t have to be in constant “deceive” mode. It’s taken a long time but I am about free of that habitual inclination- and it feels great! And I can tell there is so much more to discover and enjoy about being free. You’ll find along this journey that it just keeps getting better and better as you go. There are ups and downs, and it’s hard, but you can do it following the methods here. Your life will be better in ways you never even imagined- I know because mine already is, and I’m just starting!
To conclude, there are so many people IÂ’d love to thank. Most are still around, others have left for various reasons. I seriously think about each of you who has interacted with me in intros or PMs or texts, or signed in with support in our Jan 14 class, or met with me in person. I canÂ’t list everyone, and there are new ones to come IÂ’m sure. Just know that the fellowship is what really makes it work for me and I sincerely thank you for helping me chose to live a clean and honest and free life every day, after decades of lies deceit and slavery to an evil addiction to a deadly weed of a plant.
Damn good read there Brett. Your story sounds just like mine. Deceit over honor. What a damn joke we were BUT now look at you. Clean for almost a year now. GREAT JOB you are doing but you are not finished yet. Still a lot of work to do.
Good stuff. Thanks for writing and sharing it.
Very nice. Thanks for being here and impacting so many quits. You've definitely strengthened mine.
-
my HOF finally went in today- day 358. So, i'm a little slow! I savor it better that way! Thank you all who have helped me over the past 11+ months.
Integrity- Requires Being All In
I’ve been quit almost a year. I’ve learned a lot here. There are so many times I would have started again, starting by having “just one” for whatever lame reason I’d dream up. But not now, I understand addiction more because of this site, and because of sticking around to see how others do it, as well as how others fail.
Want to know the real secret? You have to be involved. You have to put yourself out there. Post roll here, and more. Post your experiences. Support other quitters. Get to know other quitters. The more you do here, the more likely you will succeed. ItÂ’s this social aspect, once you really understand the addiction, that makes it work. For years, for many of, chew was your secret best friend, always there with you and for you. Or so the addiction made you think. Now you have to have a replacement - real quitters as friends and supporters and enforcers if you were to slip are just the ticket.
Find the involvement that helps you the most. When I started my quit I avoided text groups, but by now a small daily text group I’m in is clearly the thing that means the absolute most to maintaining my quit daily. I do continue to post though, religiously. I also stay involved here, and you really should do that too. You have to put yourself out there—be you, be all in. You’ll make great bonds. Some guys here will be great friends. Some guys here are supreme assholes, some are heroes. It’s a mirror of life, it is what it is. But what is it mostly the opportunity to do something you have never done before, and something few ever can- the opportunity to stop feeding your nicotine addiction successfully, and if you choose, the opportunity to actually start healing from that addiction and whatever created it in you.
Finally, I want to discuss healing just a little more, because if you are so inclined, you are about to embark on some amazing growth. The part I notice first is how good it feels to be in real integrity. I no longer have this dirty little secret about my chewing, or the shame of doing something that others vocally express is very gross to them. I am free of that burden. I never realized it was such a burden before, when I was using- but then again, a fish doesn’t really know it’s in water. It feels so good to be free, and one of those great feelings I’m still getting used to after all this quit so far is that I DON’T have that little secret any more—I’m not living a lie anymore. I am honest, not a liar, and am a person I always wanted to be, not someone with a dirty lie ruling my life beyond where most can see. To be a man of integrity has always been a principle of mine, though I always lived with a big lie and in constant efforts to deceive others- hiding chew and spit and cans and making sure my teeth appeared clean and not breathing on people so they couldn’t smell the chew, and so on. Now, I don’t have to be in constant “deceive” mode. It’s taken a long time but I am about free of that habitual inclination- and it feels great! And I can tell there is so much more to discover and enjoy about being free. You’ll find along this journey that it just keeps getting better and better as you go. There are ups and downs, and it’s hard, but you can do it following the methods here. Your life will be better in ways you never even imagined- I know because mine already is, and I’m just starting!
To conclude, there are so many people IÂ’d love to thank. Most are still around, others have left for various reasons. I seriously think about each of you who has interacted with me in intros or PMs or texts, or signed in with support in our Jan 14 class, or met with me in person. I canÂ’t list everyone, and there are new ones to come IÂ’m sure. Just know that the fellowship is what really makes it work for me and I sincerely thank you for helping me chose to live a clean and honest and free life every day, after decades of lies deceit and slavery to an evil addiction to a deadly weed of a plant.
Damn good read there Brett. Your story sounds just like mine. Deceit over honor. What a damn joke we were BUT now look at you. Clean for almost a year now. GREAT JOB you are doing but you are not finished yet. Still a lot of work to do.
Good stuff. Thanks for writing and sharing it.
Very nice. Thanks for being here and impacting so many quits. You've definitely strengthened mine.
Brett, well man that was a damn good read although I am not surprised. Upon meeting you I learned that you were a very deep and intellectual person and I can proudly say that I am glad to have met you and I have been very proud to see you become the KTC whore you are. If KTC quittogethers offered travel miles you would have already earned A-List status.
Keep at it brother and continue to educate the masses about how the quit path should be followed.
-
my HOF finally went in today- day 358. So, i'm a little slow! I savor it better that way! Thank you all who have helped me over the past 11+ months.
Integrity- Requires Being All In
I’ve been quit almost a year. I’ve learned a lot here. There are so many times I would have started again, starting by having “just one” for whatever lame reason I’d dream up. But not now, I understand addiction more because of this site, and because of sticking around to see how others do it, as well as how others fail.
Want to know the real secret? You have to be involved. You have to put yourself out there. Post roll here, and more. Post your experiences. Support other quitters. Get to know other quitters. The more you do here, the more likely you will succeed. ItÂ’s this social aspect, once you really understand the addiction, that makes it work. For years, for many of, chew was your secret best friend, always there with you and for you. Or so the addiction made you think. Now you have to have a replacement - real quitters as friends and supporters and enforcers if you were to slip are just the ticket.
Find the involvement that helps you the most. When I started my quit I avoided text groups, but by now a small daily text group I’m in is clearly the thing that means the absolute most to maintaining my quit daily. I do continue to post though, religiously. I also stay involved here, and you really should do that too. You have to put yourself out there—be you, be all in. You’ll make great bonds. Some guys here will be great friends. Some guys here are supreme assholes, some are heroes. It’s a mirror of life, it is what it is. But what is it mostly the opportunity to do something you have never done before, and something few ever can- the opportunity to stop feeding your nicotine addiction successfully, and if you choose, the opportunity to actually start healing from that addiction and whatever created it in you.
Finally, I want to discuss healing just a little more, because if you are so inclined, you are about to embark on some amazing growth. The part I notice first is how good it feels to be in real integrity. I no longer have this dirty little secret about my chewing, or the shame of doing something that others vocally express is very gross to them. I am free of that burden. I never realized it was such a burden before, when I was using- but then again, a fish doesn’t really know it’s in water. It feels so good to be free, and one of those great feelings I’m still getting used to after all this quit so far is that I DON’T have that little secret any more—I’m not living a lie anymore. I am honest, not a liar, and am a person I always wanted to be, not someone with a dirty lie ruling my life beyond where most can see. To be a man of integrity has always been a principle of mine, though I always lived with a big lie and in constant efforts to deceive others- hiding chew and spit and cans and making sure my teeth appeared clean and not breathing on people so they couldn’t smell the chew, and so on. Now, I don’t have to be in constant “deceive” mode. It’s taken a long time but I am about free of that habitual inclination- and it feels great! And I can tell there is so much more to discover and enjoy about being free. You’ll find along this journey that it just keeps getting better and better as you go. There are ups and downs, and it’s hard, but you can do it following the methods here. Your life will be better in ways you never even imagined- I know because mine already is, and I’m just starting!
To conclude, there are so many people IÂ’d love to thank. Most are still around, others have left for various reasons. I seriously think about each of you who has interacted with me in intros or PMs or texts, or signed in with support in our Jan 14 class, or met with me in person. I canÂ’t list everyone, and there are new ones to come IÂ’m sure. Just know that the fellowship is what really makes it work for me and I sincerely thank you for helping me chose to live a clean and honest and free life every day, after decades of lies deceit and slavery to an evil addiction to a deadly weed of a plant.
Damn good read there Brett. Your story sounds just like mine. Deceit over honor. What a damn joke we were BUT now look at you. Clean for almost a year now. GREAT JOB you are doing but you are not finished yet. Still a lot of work to do.
Good stuff. Thanks for writing and sharing it.
Very nice. Thanks for being here and impacting so many quits. You've definitely strengthened mine.
Brett, well man that was a damn good read although I am not surprised. Upon meeting you I learned that you were a very deep and intellectual person and I can proudly say that I am glad to have met you and I have been very proud to see you become the KTC whore you are. If KTC quittogethers offered travel miles you would have already earned A-List status.
Keep at it brother and continue to educate the masses about how the quit path should be followed.
As I had suspected a long time ago, this guy gets it!!!!! Way to quit man!!!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
-
1 year..or..12 months...or...365 days of freedom. Fucking awesome bro! Congrats!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Quit with you Brett.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
I can't add much more than, "You are a fighter"! Stay quit and keep it up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have the formula of quit.
Congrats.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
I can't add much more than, "You are a fighter"! Stay quit and keep it up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have the formula of quit.
Congrats.
Haven't really talked to ya on here, but 365 is nothing to shake a stick at.
Congrats, man!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
I can't add much more than, "You are a fighter"! Stay quit and keep it up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have the formula of quit.
Congrats.
Haven't really talked to ya on here, but 365 is nothing to shake a stick at.
Congrats, man!
First off, a huge congrats brother! What a big milestone today is!
Secondly, thank you for making a difference in my quit. Your constant support and concern is what has me able to say today, "I am quit". It's evident from the outpouring you received today, that you have impacted MANY MORE more people on here.
It's an awesome day for you, and everyone who supports you. I celebrate with you today, Brett!
-
Congrats on a year Brett. Keep paddling faster.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
I can't add much more than, "You are a fighter"! Stay quit and keep it up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have the formula of quit.
Congrats.
Haven't really talked to ya on here, but 365 is nothing to shake a stick at.
Congrats, man!
First off, a huge congrats brother! What a big milestone today is!
Secondly, thank you for making a difference in my quit. Your constant support and concern is what has me able to say today, "I am quit". It's evident from the outpouring you received today, that you have impacted MANY MORE more people on here.
It's an awesome day for you, and everyone who supports you. I celebrate with you today, Brett!
Congrats. Ain't a day on the calendar you can't whip.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
I can't add much more than, "You are a fighter"! Stay quit and keep it up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have the formula of quit.
Congrats.
Haven't really talked to ya on here, but 365 is nothing to shake a stick at.
Congrats, man!
First off, a huge congrats brother! What a big milestone today is!
Secondly, thank you for making a difference in my quit. Your constant support and concern is what has me able to say today, "I am quit". It's evident from the outpouring you received today, that you have impacted MANY MORE more people on here.
It's an awesome day for you, and everyone who supports you. I celebrate with you today, Brett!
Congrats. Ain't a day on the calendar you can't whip.
Nice job, Bret. Only thing better than quit 1 year is 1 year + 1 day.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
I can't add much more than, "You are a fighter"! Stay quit and keep it up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have the formula of quit.
Congrats.
Haven't really talked to ya on here, but 365 is nothing to shake a stick at.
Congrats, man!
First off, a huge congrats brother! What a big milestone today is!
Secondly, thank you for making a difference in my quit. Your constant support and concern is what has me able to say today, "I am quit". It's evident from the outpouring you received today, that you have impacted MANY MORE more people on here.
It's an awesome day for you, and everyone who supports you. I celebrate with you today, Brett!
Congrats. Ain't a day on the calendar you can't whip.
Nice job, Bret. Only thing better than quit 1 year is 1 year + 1 day.
'party2'
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
I can't add much more than, "You are a fighter"! Stay quit and keep it up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have the formula of quit.
Congrats.
Haven't really talked to ya on here, but 365 is nothing to shake a stick at.
Congrats, man!
First off, a huge congrats brother! What a big milestone today is!
Secondly, thank you for making a difference in my quit. Your constant support and concern is what has me able to say today, "I am quit". It's evident from the outpouring you received today, that you have impacted MANY MORE more people on here.
It's an awesome day for you, and everyone who supports you. I celebrate with you today, Brett!
Congrats. Ain't a day on the calendar you can't whip.
Nice job, Bret. Only thing better than quit 1 year is 1 year + 1 day.
'party2'
Awesomeness! Congratulations on 1 year.
-
You are a badass and I am glad to know you.
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
I can't add much more than, "You are a fighter"! Stay quit and keep it up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have the formula of quit.
Congrats.
Haven't really talked to ya on here, but 365 is nothing to shake a stick at.
Congrats, man!
First off, a huge congrats brother! What a big milestone today is!
Secondly, thank you for making a difference in my quit. Your constant support and concern is what has me able to say today, "I am quit". It's evident from the outpouring you received today, that you have impacted MANY MORE more people on here.
It's an awesome day for you, and everyone who supports you. I celebrate with you today, Brett!
Congrats. Ain't a day on the calendar you can't whip.
Nice job, Bret. Only thing better than quit 1 year is 1 year + 1 day.
'party2'
Awesomeness! Congratulations on 1 year.
Congrats on the leap year...day 366
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
I can't add much more than, "You are a fighter"! Stay quit and keep it up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have the formula of quit.
Congrats.
Haven't really talked to ya on here, but 365 is nothing to shake a stick at.
Congrats, man!
First off, a huge congrats brother! What a big milestone today is!
Secondly, thank you for making a difference in my quit. Your constant support and concern is what has me able to say today, "I am quit". It's evident from the outpouring you received today, that you have impacted MANY MORE more people on here.
It's an awesome day for you, and everyone who supports you. I celebrate with you today, Brett!
Congrats. Ain't a day on the calendar you can't whip.
Nice job, Bret. Only thing better than quit 1 year is 1 year + 1 day.
'party2'
Awesomeness! Congratulations on 1 year.
Congrats on the leap year...day 366
You can't have a vortex in your intro until you are a badass quitter like Brettlees!!
-
It has been since 5th grade that I last went a full year without putting the poison genetically engineered to hook me weed in my mouth. Every summer we boys would do what it took to get some so we could be like our hero rodeo and baseball stars. I'm so happy be celebrating this milestone I can hardly know what to say. So grateful. What a blessing to have a chance to do it right. As was being discussed in the small text circle I love quitting in, this is my one quit, I'm keeping it. I love it. I don't know if I'd ever get another chance if I messed this one up.
I sincerely want to thank everyone who had helped me in the past year. If you've posted in this intro, that's you. If we've exchanged pm's or texts, that's you. Whether you are still active on this site or not. If you welcomed me into your discussions in your roll or the rare times I've hit chat, that's you. If you've taken the time to meet with me in person, you have even more appreciation and honor from me. I've tried to let others who inspired me know too- if I've let you know you helped me, I thank you too. Really, it was knowledge about addiction, and the support from other quitters, that got me this far this time. Im in this for good, starting again tomorrow. Who's in with me? Let's go!
5th grade... WOW.
Nice 365, B. Keep it rolling!!!
This is the kinda stuff to keep bumped up to the top! Way to go brutha! Damn proud to have been one of those to have met you!
Rock. On!
Congrats on a year brother. Proud to know you.
Congrats Brett! I am proud of you and want to thank you for all your support and inspiration. One year is such a great accomplishment. Love you man.
Congrats!!
Proud to be quit with you
I'm quit with ya Brettlees. Thank you for being here to support us all. You make the difference.
Congrats to you. Glad to be quit with you
Quitting with you bro, huge congrats!
Congrats on owning your life for a year! Proud to be quit with you today!
Honored to quit with you today Brett! You are bad ass.
Nice job brettles. Dont lock the door, im on my way up
You are my brother! Thanks for being a solid friend and congrats!!! 1 year rocks!!
Thank you for your support on my quit Brett, and enjoy your next dip free trip around the sun!
holy shit a guy turns around for a minute and there is another one getting through the one year door....sorry late damn dude you have rocked this quit....not only yours but I have seen your helping hand in several other quitters....
You did it right you didn't try stealing the spot light off young quitters you embedded yourself in their quits.
Strong work bro proud to have you in my corner
Hell yes to one year Brett!
Congrats on one year, since we first met there was not a doubt in my mind that you were Quit. No questions, no excuses and caving is not an option. The quit force is strong in this one and I am damn proud to call him my friend and brother.
:wood
Nice done you're a lapper now
Nice!
quit with you Brett...nicely done
Awesome work Mister!
Woop Woop! 365 days of kickin' ass! Way to go brother
Congrats on a full year!
365...Wow -- outstanding, bro!
Thanks for the support and guidance along the way -- a true asset to KTC.
Proud of You!
Takes stones to reach the milestones.
Cheers.
I can't add much more than, "You are a fighter"! Stay quit and keep it up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have the formula of quit.
Congrats.
Haven't really talked to ya on here, but 365 is nothing to shake a stick at.
Congrats, man!
First off, a huge congrats brother! What a big milestone today is!
Secondly, thank you for making a difference in my quit. Your constant support and concern is what has me able to say today, "I am quit". It's evident from the outpouring you received today, that you have impacted MANY MORE more people on here.
It's an awesome day for you, and everyone who supports you. I celebrate with you today, Brett!
Congrats. Ain't a day on the calendar you can't whip.
Nice job, Bret. Only thing better than quit 1 year is 1 year + 1 day.
'party2'
Awesomeness! Congratulations on 1 year.
Congrats on the leap year...day 366
You can't have a vortex in your intro until you are a badass quitter like Brettlees!!
Brett represents everything that is good about KTC and being quit. Congrats on 1 year
-
You are a badass and I am glad to know you.
Ditto Still not sure if you are on the other side of the Rockies or in D.C. It doesn't matter since we all quit anywhere and anyplace.
Congrats! Ghey face.
-
Man I really have to say thanks to everyone for the good words on my full year. It was almost overwhelming. One part of recovery for me is recognizing when i do good things and learning to take satisfaction in that. You all really gave me some great reinforcement for that. I really do mean it when I say that the social aspect of this quitting is probably the most important from what I can tell, at least for me, and every one who ever gives me even a scrap of support shares in each new day i log in. I"m really grateful. And committed to help others beat this thing as I continue myself.
Any new quitters: Jump in with both feet. Get to know people here, and get to know about the addiction you are fighting. This method works if you are ready to work it. You have to earn it, but it can be done.
-
Brett,
For the past year you have been a huge strength to me and this quit journey we are on. I knew you were a good guy and meeting you last night confirmed it. My quit resolve has been amplified and I cant imagine caving and letting you down. Happy to quit with you today bro!
-
Brett,
For the past year you have been a huge strength to me and this quit journey we are on. I knew you were a good guy and meeting you last night confirmed it. My quit resolve has been amplified and I cant imagine caving and letting you down. Happy to quit with you today bro!
Damn Brett has seen more people this past year than have passed through the doors of a Greyhound bus. Although he is quite the whore he is a rock solid quitter and a damn fine human being that I am glad to have as a friend.
-
Brett,
For the past year you have been a huge strength to me and this quit journey we are on. I knew you were a good guy and meeting you last night confirmed it. My quit resolve has been amplified and I cant imagine caving and letting you down. Happy to quit with you today bro!
Damn Brett has seen more people this past year than have passed through the doors of a Greyhound bus. Although he is quite the whore he is a rock solid quitter and a damn fine human being that I am glad to have as a friend.
That feeling is certainly mutual for both of you guys- you are cornerstones in my own quit.
New quitters, be sure and meet people in person if you can. Meeting these two, as well as many others, feels like an amplifying factor in my quit. I cannot imagine letting the people I have shared time, meals, and conversations with in person down. I feel supported by these connections.
In the past week, I've been honored to meet in person MookieBlaylock, Rdad, and 2mch2lv4. What a treat, each time! I wanted to make a note here so I can keep track of when I met them.
-
Congrats my friend.
Mogul
-
HAPPY BIRTHDAY Red HORSE Cock!!!!! 'party2'
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
double whammy.....
Congrats Brett!
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
double whammy.....
Congrats Brett!
Congrats on the two fer!
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
double whammy.....
Congrats Brett!
Congrats on the two fer!
Way to be Brett! Party on the 4th Floor! 'band' 'party2'
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
double whammy.....
Congrats Brett!
Congrats on the two fer!
Way to be Brett! Party on the 4th Floor! 'band' 'party2'
Rock on, m'brutha!
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
double whammy.....
Congrats Brett!
Congrats on the two fer!
Way to be Brett! Party on the 4th Floor! 'band' 'party2'
Rock on, m'brutha!
Congrats on another floor, and Happy Birthday!
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
double whammy.....
Congrats Brett!
Congrats on the two fer!
Way to be Brett! Party on the 4th Floor! 'band' 'party2'
Rock on, m'brutha!
Congrats on another floor, and Happy Birthday!
nice 4 flo!
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
double whammy.....
Congrats Brett!
Congrats on the two fer!
Way to be Brett! Party on the 4th Floor! 'band' 'party2'
Rock on, m'brutha!
Congrats on another floor, and Happy Birthday!
nice 4 flo!
Well done. 4th floor is money!
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
double whammy.....
Congrats Brett!
Congrats on the two fer!
Way to be Brett! Party on the 4th Floor! 'band' 'party2'
Rock on, m'brutha!
Congrats on another floor, and Happy Birthday!
nice 4 flo!
Well done. 4th floor is money!
Proud of you Brett. Thanks for your support and for sticking around here.
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
double whammy.....
Congrats Brett!
Congrats on the two fer!
Way to be Brett! Party on the 4th Floor! 'band' 'party2'
Rock on, m'brutha!
Congrats on another floor, and Happy Birthday!
nice 4 flo!
Well done. 4th floor is money!
Proud of you Brett. Thanks for your support and for sticking around here.
400 days.....in a row......is kick ass
Fantastic birthday present indeed.
-
Brett - Happy Birthday and congrats on 400!
Thankful to be quit with you!
CJ
double whammy.....
Congrats Brett!
Congrats on the two fer!
Way to be Brett! Party on the 4th Floor! 'band' 'party2'
Rock on, m'brutha!
Congrats on another floor, and Happy Birthday!
nice 4 flo!
Well done. 4th floor is money!
Proud of you Brett. Thanks for your support and for sticking around here.
400 days.....in a row......is kick ass
Fantastic birthday present indeed.
Enjoy not worrying about dip today bro!! 401 kick butt!!!
-
I'm going to post up some gems of quotes i've collected over time- maybe they can inspire someone like they have me. Or may you laugh like I did, in some cases.....
- Soon you will see that can for what it really is. That can is a liar, a bully, a narcissistic bitch, a killer and will steal everything you claim is important to you. MThomas 5-20-14 on Clutchski
- ThatÂ’s not lost that youÂ’re feeling. ItÂ’s freedom. You just donÂ’t know how to deal with it yet. AppleJack on Alwaysdipping 2-19-14
- Nicotine leads to desolation, isolation, and death. Quitting leads to freedom, brotherhood, and life. Steakbomb 5/1/14 on ApogeeAmmo
- I used to make excuses for dippingÂ….I now make excuses as to why I WILL NOT dip, why I must stay quit, why I must have truth, honesty and full disclosure in all of my relationships, I make excuses as to why I MUST post roll every day, excuses as to why I have to keep my daily PROMISE. Excuses as to why I must protect my integrity. Sensei Apr 7 2010
- I have strung a web of accountability in here so deep that if I disappear I know there will be a damned manhunt for me. Pinched Dec 6 2013
- The moment we remain fully and completely accountable for our actions we win. We are not unique and special butterflies; we are drug addicts. Drug addicts with free will, the power of choice. Scowick Dec 6 2013
- Birds top ten in Words of Wisdom
- Lean into the fall my friends, life can be amazing without nicotine. It's just a matter of choice skoalMonster (sM) Sept 5 2013
- The hardest part of quitting is the first step. It was the day you REALLY decided to try. That day took me years to get to. It is so much easier to stay quit than to decide to quit. Don't throw that away, you may never get here again. sM Nov 30 2012
- To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy,but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom July 1 2010 sM
- The only people who are better than me are other quitters. Basically, if you use tobacco, I am better than you. End of story. If you use tobacco, no matter how many great qualities you have, you are a loser. A huge zero. I am better than you because I beat back my addiction every day. And you can't even argue with me, because I will kill you or tickle you or kick your mom or do something else that's awesome and show you how much you suck. Dean the Coot March 31 2010
- Nicotine is that crazy bitch you dated in high school.
Yeah...she was your first. Yeah...she's got an ass that just don't quit. Yeah...there's a part of you that will always want her.
But, she's also run train with the football team behind your back and given you the clap twice and you're getting itchy down there now. She's abusive and she empties you wallet every chance she gets.
Trust me...those memories of the good times will haunt you but the reality is that you are so much better without her. She's stolen your soul. Take it the fuck back. Own this, and do whatever you really want to do. Wastepanel 12-26-13
- Nicotine is an ex-girlfriend that can fuck your brains out. Unfortunately, she runs train with the neighbors downstairs and spends your money while you're working. When you finally break up with her, she reminds you of all of your good times together and she passes over all of her mistakes. It's how the parasite assures complete obedience. Wastepanel, on MinnyÂ’s thread
- One can, half a can, three cans, tucan fucking Sam. It don't matter. An addict's an addict --Diesel 12-31-13
- Tonight wont be easy. New Years Eve...it's like a day MADE for dipping. People getting shit faced sucking down lung darts, guys thinking they are hot shit smoking down cigars the size of boat oars, metro sexuals and nickles trying to be dime women "vaping" on e-cigs. Why not be the dude with a lip full of shit spitting into a red solo cup or two fisting it with one bottle of beer and bottle of spit. New Years Eve is a fucking nicotine palooza. - Diesel 12-31-13
- For what it's worth, it sounds like you got it all figured out. A question:
If you could quit without the accountability from the site, (no roll) . Why haven't you done it long ago?
There is a comfort in standing shoulder to shoulder with another. Facing the same battles, the same fears, the same pain. It's what makes friends out of strangers. Overcoming the adversity of quitting nicotine as a community is what makes this place work.
Lone wolf it if you must, and good luck to you. There are some hurdles you still have, that you're unaware of yet. When you start to struggle I hope you find your way. This is deeper than it looks at your stage.
Besides you say you want to help others?, then stand next to them in the line up each day and let the guys in your group know that your grinding it out WITH them.
Thousands of people before you have followed the steps laid out here very successfully.
Including me. 1823 days quit.
Get with the program sparky
sM on ssever thread 1-24-14
- There are many things in life you can half-ass your way through and still be considered sucessful. Quitting isn't like that. You have to intentionally quit every day, build your accountability. TCell on Pinched, 4-17-14 
Skoal Monster and RonCross:
I learn so much from these caves! The reasons and circumstances all seem to repeat for so many people.
1. Failure to learn the basics of quit 101 will most certainly lead to a cave later on.
2. One problem + nicotine = two problems.
3. Alcohol is the biggest quit killer out there.
4. Failure to continue to post your promise every day whether you are 100 days quit or 1,000 days quit is a recipe for a cave.
5. length of quit is not related to strength of quit.
6. This is Chess.... not checkers, educate yourself
7. There is no just one.....ever
8. You are an addict.... no different than a heroin junkie
9. you will always be an addict
10. 100% of quitters that don't put nicotine in their body quit successfully
11. It's going to suck.......... until it doesn't..............and then it won't
And when the fog lifts and you understand how easy this quitting business really is you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner. It's so simple. Embrace the suck, just give in to the fact that youÂ’re going to suffer for awhile. It won't kill you despite what you think. A small amount of suffering is a reasonable price to pay to save your life I think? What about you?
 
Thanks everyone who gave the words above to us all!
-
I'm going to post up some gems of quotes i've collected over time- maybe they can inspire someone like they have me. Or may you laugh like I did, in some cases.....
- Soon you will see that can for what it really is. That can is a liar, a bully, a narcissistic bitch, a killer and will steal everything you claim is important to you. MThomas 5-20-14 on Clutchski
- ThatÂ’s not lost that youÂ’re feeling. ItÂ’s freedom. You just donÂ’t know how to deal with it yet. AppleJack on Alwaysdipping 2-19-14
- Nicotine leads to desolation, isolation, and death. Quitting leads to freedom, brotherhood, and life. Steakbomb 5/1/14 on ApogeeAmmo
- I used to make excuses for dippingÂ….I now make excuses as to why I WILL NOT dip, why I must stay quit, why I must have truth, honesty and full disclosure in all of my relationships, I make excuses as to why I MUST post roll every day, excuses as to why I have to keep my daily PROMISE. Excuses as to why I must protect my integrity. Sensei Apr 7 2010
- I have strung a web of accountability in here so deep that if I disappear I know there will be a damned manhunt for me. Pinched Dec 6 2013
- The moment we remain fully and completely accountable for our actions we win. We are not unique and special butterflies; we are drug addicts. Drug addicts with free will, the power of choice. Scowick Dec 6 2013
- Birds top ten in Words of Wisdom
- Lean into the fall my friends, life can be amazing without nicotine. It's just a matter of choice skoalMonster (sM) Sept 5 2013
- The hardest part of quitting is the first step. It was the day you REALLY decided to try. That day took me years to get to. It is so much easier to stay quit than to decide to quit. Don't throw that away, you may never get here again. sM Nov 30 2012
- To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy,but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom July 1 2010 sM
- The only people who are better than me are other quitters. Basically, if you use tobacco, I am better than you. End of story. If you use tobacco, no matter how many great qualities you have, you are a loser. A huge zero. I am better than you because I beat back my addiction every day. And you can't even argue with me, because I will kill you or tickle you or kick your mom or do something else that's awesome and show you how much you suck. Dean the Coot March 31 2010
- Nicotine is that crazy bitch you dated in high school.
Yeah...she was your first. Yeah...she's got an ass that just don't quit. Yeah...there's a part of you that will always want her.
But, she's also run train with the football team behind your back and given you the clap twice and you're getting itchy down there now. She's abusive and she empties you wallet every chance she gets.
Trust me...those memories of the good times will haunt you but the reality is that you are so much better without her. She's stolen your soul. Take it the fuck back. Own this, and do whatever you really want to do. Wastepanel 12-26-13
- Nicotine is an ex-girlfriend that can fuck your brains out. Unfortunately, she runs train with the neighbors downstairs and spends your money while you're working. When you finally break up with her, she reminds you of all of your good times together and she passes over all of her mistakes. It's how the parasite assures complete obedience. Wastepanel, on MinnyÂ’s thread
- One can, half a can, three cans, tucan fucking Sam. It don't matter. An addict's an addict --Diesel 12-31-13
- Tonight wont be easy. New Years Eve...it's like a day MADE for dipping. People getting shit faced sucking down lung darts, guys thinking they are hot shit smoking down cigars the size of boat oars, metro sexuals and nickles trying to be dime women "vaping" on e-cigs. Why not be the dude with a lip full of shit spitting into a red solo cup or two fisting it with one bottle of beer and bottle of spit. New Years Eve is a fucking nicotine palooza. - Diesel 12-31-13
- For what it's worth, it sounds like you got it all figured out. A question:
If you could quit without the accountability from the site, (no roll) . Why haven't you done it long ago?
There is a comfort in standing shoulder to shoulder with another. Facing the same battles, the same fears, the same pain. It's what makes friends out of strangers. Overcoming the adversity of quitting nicotine as a community is what makes this place work.
Lone wolf it if you must, and good luck to you. There are some hurdles you still have, that you're unaware of yet. When you start to struggle I hope you find your way. This is deeper than it looks at your stage.
Besides you say you want to help others?, then stand next to them in the line up each day and let the guys in your group know that your grinding it out WITH them.
Thousands of people before you have followed the steps laid out here very successfully.
Including me. 1823 days quit.
Get with the program sparky
sM on ssever thread 1-24-14
- There are many things in life you can half-ass your way through and still be considered sucessful. Quitting isn't like that. You have to intentionally quit every day, build your accountability. TCell on Pinched, 4-17-14 
Skoal Monster and RonCross:
I learn so much from these caves! The reasons and circumstances all seem to repeat for so many people.
1. Failure to learn the basics of quit 101 will most certainly lead to a cave later on.
2. One problem + nicotine = two problems.
3. Alcohol is the biggest quit killer out there.
4. Failure to continue to post your promise every day whether you are 100 days quit or 1,000 days quit is a recipe for a cave.
5. length of quit is not related to strength of quit.
6. This is Chess.... not checkers, educate yourself
7. There is no just one.....ever
8. You are an addict.... no different than a heroin junkie
9. you will always be an addict
10. 100% of quitters that don't put nicotine in their body quit successfully
11. It's going to suck.......... until it doesn't..............and then it won't
And when the fog lifts and you understand how easy this quitting business really is you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner. It's so simple. Embrace the suck, just give in to the fact that youÂ’re going to suffer for awhile. It won't kill you despite what you think. A small amount of suffering is a reasonable price to pay to save your life I think? What about you?
 
Thanks everyone who gave the words above to us all!
Excluding the fact that you included me (thank ya!)... ALL of this is gooooood stuff! Thanks man!
-
I'm going to post up some gems of quotes i've collected over time- maybe they can inspire someone like they have me. Or may you laugh like I did, in some cases.....
- Soon you will see that can for what it really is. That can is a liar, a bully, a narcissistic bitch, a killer and will steal everything you claim is important to you. MThomas 5-20-14 on Clutchski
- ThatÂ’s not lost that youÂ’re feeling. ItÂ’s freedom. You just donÂ’t know how to deal with it yet. AppleJack on Alwaysdipping 2-19-14
- Nicotine leads to desolation, isolation, and death. Quitting leads to freedom, brotherhood, and life. Steakbomb 5/1/14 on ApogeeAmmo
- I used to make excuses for dippingÂ….I now make excuses as to why I WILL NOT dip, why I must stay quit, why I must have truth, honesty and full disclosure in all of my relationships, I make excuses as to why I MUST post roll every day, excuses as to why I have to keep my daily PROMISE. Excuses as to why I must protect my integrity. Sensei Apr 7 2010
- I have strung a web of accountability in here so deep that if I disappear I know there will be a damned manhunt for me. Pinched Dec 6 2013
- The moment we remain fully and completely accountable for our actions we win. We are not unique and special butterflies; we are drug addicts. Drug addicts with free will, the power of choice. Scowick Dec 6 2013
- Birds top ten in Words of Wisdom
- Lean into the fall my friends, life can be amazing without nicotine. It's just a matter of choice skoalMonster (sM) Sept 5 2013
- The hardest part of quitting is the first step. It was the day you REALLY decided to try. That day took me years to get to. It is so much easier to stay quit than to decide to quit. Don't throw that away, you may never get here again. sM Nov 30 2012
- To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy,but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom July 1 2010 sM
- The only people who are better than me are other quitters. Basically, if you use tobacco, I am better than you. End of story. If you use tobacco, no matter how many great qualities you have, you are a loser. A huge zero. I am better than you because I beat back my addiction every day. And you can't even argue with me, because I will kill you or tickle you or kick your mom or do something else that's awesome and show you how much you suck. Dean the Coot March 31 2010
- Nicotine is that crazy bitch you dated in high school.
Yeah...she was your first. Yeah...she's got an ass that just don't quit. Yeah...there's a part of you that will always want her.
But, she's also run train with the football team behind your back and given you the clap twice and you're getting itchy down there now. She's abusive and she empties you wallet every chance she gets.
Trust me...those memories of the good times will haunt you but the reality is that you are so much better without her. She's stolen your soul. Take it the fuck back. Own this, and do whatever you really want to do. Wastepanel 12-26-13
- Nicotine is an ex-girlfriend that can fuck your brains out. Unfortunately, she runs train with the neighbors downstairs and spends your money while you're working. When you finally break up with her, she reminds you of all of your good times together and she passes over all of her mistakes. It's how the parasite assures complete obedience. Wastepanel, on MinnyÂ’s thread
- One can, half a can, three cans, tucan fucking Sam. It don't matter. An addict's an addict --Diesel 12-31-13
- Tonight wont be easy. New Years Eve...it's like a day MADE for dipping. People getting shit faced sucking down lung darts, guys thinking they are hot shit smoking down cigars the size of boat oars, metro sexuals and nickles trying to be dime women "vaping" on e-cigs. Why not be the dude with a lip full of shit spitting into a red solo cup or two fisting it with one bottle of beer and bottle of spit. New Years Eve is a fucking nicotine palooza. - Diesel 12-31-13
- For what it's worth, it sounds like you got it all figured out. A question:
If you could quit without the accountability from the site, (no roll) . Why haven't you done it long ago?
There is a comfort in standing shoulder to shoulder with another. Facing the same battles, the same fears, the same pain. It's what makes friends out of strangers. Overcoming the adversity of quitting nicotine as a community is what makes this place work.
Lone wolf it if you must, and good luck to you. There are some hurdles you still have, that you're unaware of yet. When you start to struggle I hope you find your way. This is deeper than it looks at your stage.
Besides you say you want to help others?, then stand next to them in the line up each day and let the guys in your group know that your grinding it out WITH them.
Thousands of people before you have followed the steps laid out here very successfully.
Including me. 1823 days quit.
Get with the program sparky
sM on ssever thread 1-24-14
- There are many things in life you can half-ass your way through and still be considered sucessful. Quitting isn't like that. You have to intentionally quit every day, build your accountability. TCell on Pinched, 4-17-14 
Skoal Monster and RonCross:
I learn so much from these caves! The reasons and circumstances all seem to repeat for so many people.
1. Failure to learn the basics of quit 101 will most certainly lead to a cave later on.
2. One problem + nicotine = two problems.
3. Alcohol is the biggest quit killer out there.
4. Failure to continue to post your promise every day whether you are 100 days quit or 1,000 days quit is a recipe for a cave.
5. length of quit is not related to strength of quit.
6. This is Chess.... not checkers, educate yourself
7. There is no just one.....ever
8. You are an addict.... no different than a heroin junkie
9. you will always be an addict
10. 100% of quitters that don't put nicotine in their body quit successfully
11. It's going to suck.......... until it doesn't..............and then it won't
And when the fog lifts and you understand how easy this quitting business really is you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner. It's so simple. Embrace the suck, just give in to the fact that youÂ’re going to suffer for awhile. It won't kill you despite what you think. A small amount of suffering is a reasonable price to pay to save your life I think? What about you?
 
Thanks everyone who gave the words above to us all!
Excluding the fact that you included me (thank ya!)... ALL of this is gooooood stuff! Thanks man!
AJ you are cornerstones of this site. You just don't know how to deal with it yet. :D
-
I'm going to post up some gems of quotes i've collected over time- maybe they can inspire someone like they have me. Or may you laugh like I did, in some cases.....
- Soon you will see that can for what it really is. That can is a liar, a bully, a narcissistic bitch, a killer and will steal everything you claim is important to you. MThomas 5-20-14 on Clutchski
- ThatÂ’s not lost that youÂ’re feeling. ItÂ’s freedom. You just donÂ’t know how to deal with it yet. AppleJack on Alwaysdipping 2-19-14
- Nicotine leads to desolation, isolation, and death. Quitting leads to freedom, brotherhood, and life. Steakbomb 5/1/14 on ApogeeAmmo
- I used to make excuses for dippingÂ….I now make excuses as to why I WILL NOT dip, why I must stay quit, why I must have truth, honesty and full disclosure in all of my relationships, I make excuses as to why I MUST post roll every day, excuses as to why I have to keep my daily PROMISE. Excuses as to why I must protect my integrity. Sensei Apr 7 2010
- I have strung a web of accountability in here so deep that if I disappear I know there will be a damned manhunt for me. Pinched Dec 6 2013
- The moment we remain fully and completely accountable for our actions we win. We are not unique and special butterflies; we are drug addicts. Drug addicts with free will, the power of choice. Scowick Dec 6 2013
- Birds top ten in Words of Wisdom
- Lean into the fall my friends, life can be amazing without nicotine. It's just a matter of choice skoalMonster (sM) Sept 5 2013
- The hardest part of quitting is the first step. It was the day you REALLY decided to try. That day took me years to get to. It is so much easier to stay quit than to decide to quit. Don't throw that away, you may never get here again. sM Nov 30 2012
- To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy,but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom July 1 2010 sM
- The only people who are better than me are other quitters. Basically, if you use tobacco, I am better than you. End of story. If you use tobacco, no matter how many great qualities you have, you are a loser. A huge zero. I am better than you because I beat back my addiction every day. And you can't even argue with me, because I will kill you or tickle you or kick your mom or do something else that's awesome and show you how much you suck. Dean the Coot March 31 2010
- Nicotine is that crazy bitch you dated in high school.
Yeah...she was your first. Yeah...she's got an ass that just don't quit. Yeah...there's a part of you that will always want her.
But, she's also run train with the football team behind your back and given you the clap twice and you're getting itchy down there now. She's abusive and she empties you wallet every chance she gets.
Trust me...those memories of the good times will haunt you but the reality is that you are so much better without her. She's stolen your soul. Take it the fuck back. Own this, and do whatever you really want to do. Wastepanel 12-26-13
- Nicotine is an ex-girlfriend that can fuck your brains out. Unfortunately, she runs train with the neighbors downstairs and spends your money while you're working. When you finally break up with her, she reminds you of all of your good times together and she passes over all of her mistakes. It's how the parasite assures complete obedience. Wastepanel, on MinnyÂ’s thread
- One can, half a can, three cans, tucan fucking Sam. It don't matter. An addict's an addict --Diesel 12-31-13
- Tonight wont be easy. New Years Eve...it's like a day MADE for dipping. People getting shit faced sucking down lung darts, guys thinking they are hot shit smoking down cigars the size of boat oars, metro sexuals and nickles trying to be dime women "vaping" on e-cigs. Why not be the dude with a lip full of shit spitting into a red solo cup or two fisting it with one bottle of beer and bottle of spit. New Years Eve is a fucking nicotine palooza. - Diesel 12-31-13
- For what it's worth, it sounds like you got it all figured out. A question:
If you could quit without the accountability from the site, (no roll) . Why haven't you done it long ago?
There is a comfort in standing shoulder to shoulder with another. Facing the same battles, the same fears, the same pain. It's what makes friends out of strangers. Overcoming the adversity of quitting nicotine as a community is what makes this place work.
Lone wolf it if you must, and good luck to you. There are some hurdles you still have, that you're unaware of yet. When you start to struggle I hope you find your way. This is deeper than it looks at your stage.
Besides you say you want to help others?, then stand next to them in the line up each day and let the guys in your group know that your grinding it out WITH them.
Thousands of people before you have followed the steps laid out here very successfully.
Including me. 1823 days quit.
Get with the program sparky
sM on ssever thread 1-24-14
- There are many things in life you can half-ass your way through and still be considered sucessful. Quitting isn't like that. You have to intentionally quit every day, build your accountability. TCell on Pinched, 4-17-14 
Skoal Monster and RonCross:
I learn so much from these caves! The reasons and circumstances all seem to repeat for so many people.
1. Failure to learn the basics of quit 101 will most certainly lead to a cave later on.
2. One problem + nicotine = two problems.
3. Alcohol is the biggest quit killer out there.
4. Failure to continue to post your promise every day whether you are 100 days quit or 1,000 days quit is a recipe for a cave.
5. length of quit is not related to strength of quit.
6. This is Chess.... not checkers, educate yourself
7. There is no just one.....ever
8. You are an addict.... no different than a heroin junkie
9. you will always be an addict
10. 100% of quitters that don't put nicotine in their body quit successfully
11. It's going to suck.......... until it doesn't..............and then it won't
And when the fog lifts and you understand how easy this quitting business really is you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner. It's so simple. Embrace the suck, just give in to the fact that youÂ’re going to suffer for awhile. It won't kill you despite what you think. A small amount of suffering is a reasonable price to pay to save your life I think? What about you?
 
Thanks everyone who gave the words above to us all!
Excluding the fact that you included me (thank ya!)... ALL of this is gooooood stuff! Thanks man!
AJ you are cornerstones of this site. You just don't know how to deal with it yet. :D
Thanks for making me stronger, Brett. Always enjoy peeking into "the mind of brettlees". You're a hardcore, bad to the bone quitter. Proud to call you a friend!
-
I'm going to post up some gems of quotes i've collected over time- maybe they can inspire someone like they have me. Or may you laugh like I did, in some cases.....
- Soon you will see that can for what it really is. That can is a liar, a bully, a narcissistic bitch, a killer and will steal everything you claim is important to you. MThomas 5-20-14 on Clutchski
- ThatÂ’s not lost that youÂ’re feeling. ItÂ’s freedom. You just donÂ’t know how to deal with it yet. AppleJack on Alwaysdipping 2-19-14
- Nicotine leads to desolation, isolation, and death. Quitting leads to freedom, brotherhood, and life. Steakbomb 5/1/14 on ApogeeAmmo
- I used to make excuses for dippingÂ….I now make excuses as to why I WILL NOT dip, why I must stay quit, why I must have truth, honesty and full disclosure in all of my relationships, I make excuses as to why I MUST post roll every day, excuses as to why I have to keep my daily PROMISE. Excuses as to why I must protect my integrity. Sensei Apr 7 2010
- I have strung a web of accountability in here so deep that if I disappear I know there will be a damned manhunt for me. Pinched Dec 6 2013
- The moment we remain fully and completely accountable for our actions we win. We are not unique and special butterflies; we are drug addicts. Drug addicts with free will, the power of choice. Scowick Dec 6 2013
- Birds top ten in Words of Wisdom
- Lean into the fall my friends, life can be amazing without nicotine. It's just a matter of choice skoalMonster (sM) Sept 5 2013
- The hardest part of quitting is the first step. It was the day you REALLY decided to try. That day took me years to get to. It is so much easier to stay quit than to decide to quit. Don't throw that away, you may never get here again. sM Nov 30 2012
- To quit means to face withdrawal, it requires the confrontation of triggers without using nicotine. It will not always be easy,but get over it. This is the price you pay to earn your freedom July 1 2010 sM
- The only people who are better than me are other quitters. Basically, if you use tobacco, I am better than you. End of story. If you use tobacco, no matter how many great qualities you have, you are a loser. A huge zero. I am better than you because I beat back my addiction every day. And you can't even argue with me, because I will kill you or tickle you or kick your mom or do something else that's awesome and show you how much you suck. Dean the Coot March 31 2010
- Nicotine is that crazy bitch you dated in high school.
Yeah...she was your first. Yeah...she's got an ass that just don't quit. Yeah...there's a part of you that will always want her.
But, she's also run train with the football team behind your back and given you the clap twice and you're getting itchy down there now. She's abusive and she empties you wallet every chance she gets.
Trust me...those memories of the good times will haunt you but the reality is that you are so much better without her. She's stolen your soul. Take it the fuck back. Own this, and do whatever you really want to do. Wastepanel 12-26-13
- Nicotine is an ex-girlfriend that can fuck your brains out. Unfortunately, she runs train with the neighbors downstairs and spends your money while you're working. When you finally break up with her, she reminds you of all of your good times together and she passes over all of her mistakes. It's how the parasite assures complete obedience. Wastepanel, on MinnyÂ’s thread
- One can, half a can, three cans, tucan fucking Sam. It don't matter. An addict's an addict --Diesel 12-31-13
- Tonight wont be easy. New Years Eve...it's like a day MADE for dipping. People getting shit faced sucking down lung darts, guys thinking they are hot shit smoking down cigars the size of boat oars, metro sexuals and nickles trying to be dime women "vaping" on e-cigs. Why not be the dude with a lip full of shit spitting into a red solo cup or two fisting it with one bottle of beer and bottle of spit. New Years Eve is a fucking nicotine palooza. - Diesel 12-31-13
- For what it's worth, it sounds like you got it all figured out. A question:
If you could quit without the accountability from the site, (no roll) . Why haven't you done it long ago?
There is a comfort in standing shoulder to shoulder with another. Facing the same battles, the same fears, the same pain. It's what makes friends out of strangers. Overcoming the adversity of quitting nicotine as a community is what makes this place work.
Lone wolf it if you must, and good luck to you. There are some hurdles you still have, that you're unaware of yet. When you start to struggle I hope you find your way. This is deeper than it looks at your stage.
Besides you say you want to help others?, then stand next to them in the line up each day and let the guys in your group know that your grinding it out WITH them.
Thousands of people before you have followed the steps laid out here very successfully.
Including me. 1823 days quit.
Get with the program sparky
sM on ssever thread 1-24-14
- There are many things in life you can half-ass your way through and still be considered sucessful. Quitting isn't like that. You have to intentionally quit every day, build your accountability. TCell on Pinched, 4-17-14 
Skoal Monster and RonCross:
I learn so much from these caves! The reasons and circumstances all seem to repeat for so many people.
1. Failure to learn the basics of quit 101 will most certainly lead to a cave later on.
2. One problem + nicotine = two problems.
3. Alcohol is the biggest quit killer out there.
4. Failure to continue to post your promise every day whether you are 100 days quit or 1,000 days quit is a recipe for a cave.
5. length of quit is not related to strength of quit.
6. This is Chess.... not checkers, educate yourself
7. There is no just one.....ever
8. You are an addict.... no different than a heroin junkie
9. you will always be an addict
10. 100% of quitters that don't put nicotine in their body quit successfully
11. It's going to suck.......... until it doesn't..............and then it won't
And when the fog lifts and you understand how easy this quitting business really is you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner. It's so simple. Embrace the suck, just give in to the fact that youÂ’re going to suffer for awhile. It won't kill you despite what you think. A small amount of suffering is a reasonable price to pay to save your life I think? What about you?
 
Thanks everyone who gave the words above to us all!
Excluding the fact that you included me (thank ya!)... ALL of this is gooooood stuff! Thanks man!
AJ you are cornerstones of this site. You just don't know how to deal with it yet. :D
Thanks for making me stronger, Brett. Always enjoy peeking into "the mind of brettlees". You're a hardcore, bad to the bone quitter. Proud to call you a friend!
quit wood!
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
5th floor, congrats man!
BAQ April Ape support
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
5th floor, congrats man!
BAQ April Ape support
Hot damn.... lookit that Red Horse man quit!! Seriously proud to be a fellow quitter Brett! That's awesome!!! Didn't realize you were that close until saw it on the forum today....apologies for not paying closer attention!!
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
5th floor, congrats man!
BAQ April Ape support
Hot damn.... lookit that Red Horse man quit!! Seriously proud to be a fellow quitter Brett! That's awesome!!! Didn't realize you were that close until saw it on the forum today....apologies for not paying closer attention!!
Well done! Congrats on 500 brother Brett!!
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
5th floor, congrats man!
BAQ April Ape support
Hot damn.... lookit that Red Horse man quit!! Seriously proud to be a fellow quitter Brett! That's awesome!!! Didn't realize you were that close until saw it on the forum today....apologies for not paying closer attention!!
Well done! Congrats on 500 brother Brett!!
Awesome accomplishment Brett! Proud of you. Thanks for being such a great quit brother. Please continue to stay here and be quit with us.
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
500? Damn!!! That's awesome shit. Keep up the quit!!!
Quit on...
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
500? Damn!!! That's awesome shit. Keep up the quit!!!
Quit on...
Congrats my Brother! On to 600
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
500? Damn!!! That's awesome shit. Keep up the quit!!!
Quit on...
Congrats my Brother! On to 600
Thank you for your support Brett! 500 looks good on you!
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
500? Damn!!! That's awesome shit. Keep up the quit!!!
Quit on...
Congrats my Brother! On to 600
Thank you for your support Brett! 500 looks good on you!
'oh yeah' BOOYAH! Nicely Done Brett!!! She never gives up so keep 'puttin her down'
Blood Oath of the traveling shirt gives me permission to hunt you down
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
500? Damn!!! That's awesome shit. Keep up the quit!!!
Quit on...
Congrats my Brother! On to 600
Thank you for your support Brett! 500 looks good on you!
'oh yeah' BOOYAH! Nicely Done Brett!!! She never gives up so keep 'puttin her down'
Blood Oath of the traveling shirt gives me permission to hunt you down
600 brings a nice new view! Congrats on being quit and being committed to keep it up one day at a time.
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
500? Damn!!! That's awesome shit. Keep up the quit!!!
Quit on...
Congrats my Brother! On to 600
Thank you for your support Brett! 500 looks good on you!
'oh yeah' BOOYAH! Nicely Done Brett!!! She never gives up so keep 'puttin her down'
Blood Oath of the traveling shirt gives me permission to hunt you down
600 brings a nice new view! Congrats on being quit and being committed to keep it up one day at a time.
Half comma kudos! You are a BAQ my friend.
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
500? Damn!!! That's awesome shit. Keep up the quit!!!
Quit on...
Congrats my Brother! On to 600
Thank you for your support Brett! 500 looks good on you!
'oh yeah' BOOYAH! Nicely Done Brett!!! She never gives up so keep 'puttin her down'
Blood Oath of the traveling shirt gives me permission to hunt you down
600 brings a nice new view! Congrats on being quit and being committed to keep it up one day at a time.
Half comma kudos! You are a BAQ my friend.
Legend in the making.
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
500? Damn!!! That's awesome shit. Keep up the quit!!!
Quit on...
Congrats my Brother! On to 600
Thank you for your support Brett! 500 looks good on you!
'oh yeah' BOOYAH! Nicely Done Brett!!! She never gives up so keep 'puttin her down'
Blood Oath of the traveling shirt gives me permission to hunt you down
600 brings a nice new view! Congrats on being quit and being committed to keep it up one day at a time.
Half comma kudos! You are a BAQ my friend.
Legend in the making.
Congrats on the big 5-0-0. Awesome job.
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
500? Damn!!! That's awesome shit. Keep up the quit!!!
Quit on...
Congrats my Brother! On to 600
Thank you for your support Brett! 500 looks good on you!
'oh yeah' BOOYAH! Nicely Done Brett!!! She never gives up so keep 'puttin her down'
Blood Oath of the traveling shirt gives me permission to hunt you down
600 brings a nice new view! Congrats on being quit and being committed to keep it up one day at a time.
Half comma kudos! You are a BAQ my friend.
Legend in the making.
Congrats on the big 5-0-0. Awesome job.
Thank you Brett for all the support and laughs. Keep adding the ones
-
Congrats Brett on getting to Number 6 today! See you tomorrow!
-
Congrats on the 500th bro, proud to quit with you EDD!! 'clap'
Congrats on 500 my quit brother and day twin. I am glad to have you as a brother and friend.
DITTO!!!
I wouldn't be here still without your support Brett. Congrats Brother!
You guys all rock- thank you! I was reflecting last night. It's amazing to be quit this long, because it's amazing the craves, triggers, and obstacles i've learned how to overcome or get through. I would have caved so many times-- life deals you things that the addiction will teach you to treat as a trigger, an excuse to have "just one" and then we all know what happens.
I never made it before in attempting to quit because I never had (1) a support network and (2) enough knowledge about the enemy i was fighting. It always tricked me, and nobody who knew what i was going through was there to help. This is the difference and why it works here. Newer quitters, you make this happen by jumping in, with both feet. Make friends here. Lots of them. People with all lengths of quits. They will hold you up. It's how it works. Also, get all the knowledge you can. This is a nasty, evil addiction. Hard-core, hard-wired messing with your brain, and you have to know the sorts of tricks it can try.... it will try them all, over time.
I'm still fighting. Just the past couple of days i've had some pretty strong "emptiness" sensations that i recognize used to send me straight to a can, even for "just one" if i had been stopped for a while. I don't always know why these come, but they sometimes just show up. Other times they can come with a trigger i can predict, but not always. What keeps me quit lately is a text group i'm in---- but i built those relationships by working the program here very hard- making connections, learning what i'm fighting, helping others and letting them help me. Meeting others in person is huge too... i honestly believe there are several guys who would hunt me down if i went missing- so I guess I followed in P's footsteps from the quote in my signature line.
The craves still come- i remember 380s being another tough spell for no apparent reason, just like the last few days. But regardless of the feelings that USED to be triggers, I have no interest in the damned weed anymore. It doesn't help me. I have the tools to beat any crave. All i have to do is use them. I also have the knowledge that these tools have gotten me through some pretty darned extreme circumstances in my quit time, so I know there is no reason for failure.
Along the way, I am learning how to live a life with out that ball and chain addiction weighing me down. I am learning how to have self esteem that is untarnished by a dirtly little secret habit and the shame of that. I am learning how to deal with stressors, lonliness as it comes, and anything else iwithout numbing it. I am learning how to be truly free. You all help me so much! The can, the addiction, used to be my perceived friend through it all. I took the jump, and those of you who support me or who come sign in in Jan 13 have taken the place of that old reliable.... bitch of an addiction tricking me into killing myself. You all are the gift i received for taking the risk of really quitting. Thank you for all the help along the way---LET'S KEEP KILLING THIS SNEAKY, SCARY, F-ED UP ADDICTION, and FIGHTING ALL THE POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL SYSTEM PLAYERS THAT ARE KEEPING IT KILLING GOOD PEOPLE BY TRICKING THEM INTO SLAVERY!!
Amen Brett! I'm proud to quit with you today!
500 is huge, and 1 day at a time the struggles get better. Well done my friend.
I am very happy for you Brett. And as usual, you eloquently laid out the depth of this addiction and the value of how together we can keep it at bay. Congrats on 500!
CJ.
500? Damn!!! That's awesome shit. Keep up the quit!!!
Quit on...
Congrats my Brother! On to 600
Thank you for your support Brett! 500 looks good on you!
'oh yeah' BOOYAH! Nicely Done Brett!!! She never gives up so keep 'puttin her down'
Blood Oath of the traveling shirt gives me permission to hunt you down
600 brings a nice new view! Congrats on being quit and being committed to keep it up one day at a time.
Half comma kudos! You are a BAQ my friend.
Legend in the making.
Congrats on the big 5-0-0. Awesome job.
Thank you Brett for all the support and laughs. Keep adding the ones
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
Congrats on 600!
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
Congrats on 600!
Way to be Brett. I would not be here without you. Keep climbing and I'll keep following.
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
Congrats on 600!
Way to be Brett. I would not be here without you. Keep climbing and I'll keep following.
'Sing and Drink' 'wave' 'party' 'poledancer' 'hit it' 'do it' 'party2' 'party2' 'do it' 'hit it' 'poledancer' 'party' 'wave' 'Sing and Drink'
For all that you do and all the emoticons you post...this one's for you bud
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
Congrats on 600!
Way to be Brett. I would not be here without you. Keep climbing and I'll keep following.
'Sing and Drink' 'wave' 'party' 'poledancer' 'hit it' 'do it' 'party2' 'party2' 'do it' 'hit it' 'poledancer' 'party' 'wave' 'Sing and Drink'
For all that you do and all the emoticons you post...this one's for you bud
'oh yeah' rock star man congrats on 600 thank you for being part of my quit...enjoy your day
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
Congrats on 600!
Way to be Brett. I would not be here without you. Keep climbing and I'll keep following.
'Sing and Drink' 'wave' 'party' 'poledancer' 'hit it' 'do it' 'party2' 'party2' 'do it' 'hit it' 'poledancer' 'party' 'wave' 'Sing and Drink'
For all that you do and all the emoticons you post...this one's for you bud
'oh yeah' rock star man congrats on 600 thank you for being part of my quit...enjoy your day
Congrats on 600 Brett! You have been a huge part of my quit and I appreciate it! I think this warrants a celebration!
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
Congrats on 600!
Way to be Brett. I would not be here without you. Keep climbing and I'll keep following.
'Sing and Drink' 'wave' 'party' 'poledancer' 'hit it' 'do it' 'party2' 'party2' 'do it' 'hit it' 'poledancer' 'party' 'wave' 'Sing and Drink'
For all that you do and all the emoticons you post...this one's for you bud
'oh yeah' rock star man congrats on 600 thank you for being part of my quit...enjoy your day
Congrats on 600 Brett! You have been a huge part of my quit and I appreciate it! I think this warrants a celebration!
Proud to be doing this side by side bro!
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
Congrats on 600!
Way to be Brett. I would not be here without you. Keep climbing and I'll keep following.
'Sing and Drink' 'wave' 'party' 'poledancer' 'hit it' 'do it' 'party2' 'party2' 'do it' 'hit it' 'poledancer' 'party' 'wave' 'Sing and Drink'
For all that you do and all the emoticons you post...this one's for you bud
'oh yeah' rock star man congrats on 600 thank you for being part of my quit...enjoy your day
Congrats on 600 Brett! You have been a huge part of my quit and I appreciate it! I think this warrants a celebration!
Proud to be doing this side by side bro!
Nice job Brother!!!! On to 700!!
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
Congrats on 600!
Way to be Brett. I would not be here without you. Keep climbing and I'll keep following.
'Sing and Drink' 'wave' 'party' 'poledancer' 'hit it' 'do it' 'party2' 'party2' 'do it' 'hit it' 'poledancer' 'party' 'wave' 'Sing and Drink'
For all that you do and all the emoticons you post...this one's for you bud
'oh yeah' rock star man congrats on 600 thank you for being part of my quit...enjoy your day
Congrats on 600 Brett! You have been a huge part of my quit and I appreciate it! I think this warrants a celebration!
Proud to be doing this side by side bro!
Nice job Brother!!!! On to 700!!
Keep it up man. Very proud of you.
-
600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
Congrats on 600!
Way to be Brett. I would not be here without you. Keep climbing and I'll keep following.
'Sing and Drink' 'wave' 'party' 'poledancer' 'hit it' 'do it' 'party2' 'party2' 'do it' 'hit it' 'poledancer' 'party' 'wave' 'Sing and Drink'
For all that you do and all the emoticons you post...this one's for you bud
'oh yeah' rock star man congrats on 600 thank you for being part of my quit...enjoy your day
Congrats on 600 Brett! You have been a huge part of my quit and I appreciate it! I think this warrants a celebration!
Proud to be doing this side by side bro!
Nice job Brother!!!! On to 700!!
Keep it up man. Very proud of you.
my kind of dog pile !!!
'oh yeah'
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600!!! Man life sure is great when you are winning every day! Thanks for helping so many of us on your own journey!
Enjoy a big milestone today!
Nice 6 hundo Brett!
Congrats on 600 to my brother in quit. Thank you for making my quit better.
Congrats on 600!
Way to be Brett. I would not be here without you. Keep climbing and I'll keep following.
'Sing and Drink' 'wave' 'party' 'poledancer' 'hit it' 'do it' 'party2' 'party2' 'do it' 'hit it' 'poledancer' 'party' 'wave' 'Sing and Drink'
For all that you do and all the emoticons you post...this one's for you bud
'oh yeah' rock star man congrats on 600 thank you for being part of my quit...enjoy your day
Congrats on 600 Brett! You have been a huge part of my quit and I appreciate it! I think this warrants a celebration!
Proud to be doing this side by side bro!
Nice job Brother!!!! On to 700!!
Keep it up man. Very proud of you.
my kind of dog pile !!!
'oh yeah'
I've been busy traveling and working hard, where internet is pretty limited. Just saw this today and almost teared up from how much I appreciate the support from each and every one of you quit heroes! Thanks so much for helping me. I still fight daily with each of you, and some days you are the difference.
New quitters: build a network here. It's what finally made it possible for me to be quit this long, through some pretty tough struggles.
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Brett - Congrats on 700 brother! It's been great to have a badass quitter like you supporting me. Onward my friend!
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Brett - Congrats on 700 brother! It's been great to have a badass quitter like you supporting me. Onward my friend!
Floor 7 is sweet. Congratulations on another big win Brett!
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Brett - Congrats on 700 brother! It's been great to have a badass quitter like you supporting me. Onward my friend!
Floor 7 is sweet. Congratulations on another big win Brett!
7th floor Kudos BadAssQuitter! 'oh yeah' Enjoy your freedom Brett!
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Brett - Congrats on 700 brother! It's been great to have a badass quitter like you supporting me. Onward my friend!
Floor 7 is sweet. Congratulations on another big win Brett!
7th floor Kudos BadAssQuitter! 'oh yeah' Enjoy your freedom Brett!
Just another day in the life...congrats Brett on crushing yet another milestone.
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Brett - Congrats on 700 brother! It's been great to have a badass quitter like you supporting me. Onward my friend!
Floor 7 is sweet. Congratulations on another big win Brett!
7th floor Kudos BadAssQuitter! 'oh yeah' Enjoy your freedom Brett!
Just another day in the life...congrats Brett on crushing yet another milestone.
Congrats Brett! Keep going, and I will keep following.
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Brett - Congrats on 700 brother! It's been great to have a badass quitter like you supporting me. Onward my friend!
Floor 7 is sweet. Congratulations on another big win Brett!
7th floor Kudos BadAssQuitter! 'oh yeah' Enjoy your freedom Brett!
Just another day in the life...congrats Brett on crushing yet another milestone.
Congrats Brett! Keep going, and I will keep following.
Dogpile!!
Congrats my brother! Proud to have shared in the journey with you!
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Brett - Congrats on 700 brother! It's been great to have a badass quitter like you supporting me. Onward my friend!
Floor 7 is sweet. Congratulations on another big win Brett!
7th floor Kudos BadAssQuitter! 'oh yeah' Enjoy your freedom Brett!
Just another day in the life...congrats Brett on crushing yet another milestone.
Congrats Brett! Keep going, and I will keep following.
Dogpile!!
Congrats my brother! Proud to have shared in the journey with you!
You guys all rock! Thanks for the support- it makes the difference from all the failed attempts for years!
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Brett - Congrats on 700 brother! It's been great to have a badass quitter like you supporting me. Onward my friend!
Floor 7 is sweet. Congratulations on another big win Brett!
7th floor Kudos BadAssQuitter! 'oh yeah' Enjoy your freedom Brett!
Just another day in the life...congrats Brett on crushing yet another milestone.
Congrats Brett! Keep going, and I will keep following.
Dogpile!!
Congrats my brother! Proud to have shared in the journey with you!
You guys all rock! Thanks for the support- it makes the difference from all the failed attempts for years!
Mr. RedHorse,
Cannot tell you how many times I have directed noobs to your name SOLELY to pull the information you had contained in your signature block and read that information. You sir, are becoming legend! Quit on! Proud to be following in your wake!
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It's been a while since i posted anything about the quit journey, but it's worth putting a couple new, recent, events here. First, a snapshot of life at 700 days, less than 10% but more than 5% of the time i spent actively addicted and using. Life is so much better now. Every little bit of struggle in the early quit, and every challenge since then, is worth it. And it wasn't easy! The fog that lasted so long i thought i had brain damage. The pain. The tests life threw my way. Not that more won't come, but man, so far so AMAZING it is to be free. I'm still struck sometimes, and grateful more often that I finally learned that in order to successfully quit, i needed to learn about the addiction i was trapped in in gory detail, and i needed a support network with daily maintenance on my part.
Now... dip dreams. They still happen. A quit-class bro of mine also said he still gets them. I had one the other night- it was crazier than ever. The dentist had me pack one in, as part of what he was doing to treat a cavity i had. I thought, in the dream, that i should ask him if there was another way since I'm a nicotine addict who is quit. And, i hoped that i wouldnt have to go through withdrawal like i did before, and that i wouldn't be hooked. I didnt get the chance to ask for the alternative, because i woke up. My friend Rdad always has a great attitude about quitting, and he points out about dip dreams is that they are great when you wake up because you realize they aren't real. That's the perspective i took on this one. That, and it was a really strange one.
And, today, at a health conference in DC, i was on the elevator with two other guys, one of whom is a doctor- as in physician. He packed in a "pinch between the cheek and gums" of my old crutch/bitch Copenhagen. Would have surprised me, but for the doctors, dentists, etc. here among us at KTC. The smell was bad, but the nicbitch also tried to whisper to me that it'd set me free to have some. I guess the claws are still in me. I'm grateful for the reminder that I still have to work against complacency, which is the main battle i see after a certain amount of time gets you to relearn old habits after beating withdrawal first.
So, i've been busy learning how to live without dip, for nearly two years, after over 30 of using, nearly 30 of being clearly addicted and helpless to quit. It's still a new way of being, and the pulls away from it still come- but the key is i know how to deal with those, and it still gets better all the time. The key at this point is keeping accountability and support maintained by regular effort on my part- regular posting, and keeping communications alive with a ragtag collection of absolute heroes i've met here at KTC that help me just by being there, sharing life as it comes and goes, and caring about each other. The connection, the relationships, really do matter the most now. And you have to work to keep them going so they are then when you might need them. And in the meantime, life is simply more rich than before.
Quit on!
If you haven't quit yet, DO IT NOW! Don't set a date! JUST DO IT! get through the hard part up front, and it just keeps getting better. The more you put in, the better it is for the long haul.
If you have a newer quit and are reading the site to help your understanding of what you are going through, and to help your sanity, HANG IN THERE! everything you have gone through, someone else has also. Read enough and youll find it all here. It helped me a lot to see my story in the stories of others, early in their quit. Drink it all in, maintain your quit, keep making friends and connections here- they will help you immeasurably in the long run.
This all works-- you just to have work it to make it happen!
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Monday night football- San Diego meetup- coming right up! More details to come,
But let's do it!!!!
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2 years of freedom!!!
Congratulations Brett - and thanks for all of the support along the way. You are officially FOG FREE!
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2 years of freedom!!!
Congratulations Brett - and thanks for all of the support along the way. You are officially FOG FREE!
Yeah, man! Congrats brother!
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2 years of freedom!!!
Congratulations Brett - and thanks for all of the support along the way. You are officially FOG FREE!
Yeah, man! Congrats brother!
2 trips around the sun, nice quit brother!
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2 years of freedom!!!
Congratulations Brett - and thanks for all of the support along the way. You are officially FOG FREE!
Yeah, man! Congrats brother!
Oh Man Brett! This is a huge milestone. I can tell you for sure I would not be here without you trudging along one month ahead of me.
Well done Brother. Take a minute to think about where you were 2 years ago. You claimed your freedom and never looked back! 'worship'
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2 years of freedom!!!
Congratulations Brett - and thanks for all of the support along the way. You are officially FOG FREE!
Yeah, man! Congrats brother!
Oh Man Brett! This is a huge milestone. I can tell you for sure I would not be here without you trudging along one month ahead of me.
Well done Brother. Take a minute to think about where you were 2 years ago. You claimed your freedom and never looked back! 'worship'
Very well done, you have certainly woven one hell of a net of accountability over these last two years.
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2 years of freedom!!!
Congratulations Brett - and thanks for all of the support along the way. You are officially FOG FREE!
Yeah, man! Congrats brother!
Oh Man Brett! This is a huge milestone. I can tell you for sure I would not be here without you trudging along one month ahead of me.
Well done Brother. Take a minute to think about where you were 2 years ago. You claimed your freedom and never looked back! 'worship'
Very well done, you have certainly woven one hell of a net of accountability over these last two years.
Awesome job Brett! Screw the leap day - its 2 years! Congrats and thanks for all you do here! Very proud to be quit with you.
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my quit group- the January 2014 Killers- has been down to 3 regular posters for some time, and a good couple handfuls of other badasses who post regularly with us. I'm really thankful for those others, each of then. Last night, i got to meet up with two rock solid quitters from among them- MN_Ben (who, along with Sh4string and I are all that remain from our other class) and Natro. These guys are both rock solid, and have been guides to many others.
It recharges a quit to meet up face to face, and it really was great to do it. Newer quitters, if at all possible, get to know other quitters face to face. It makes a world of difference.
and, today, i celebrate a milestone i personally have always really liked--- day number 777-- a jackpot quit, a jumbo airliner quit day! QUIT ON!!!!
'boob'
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my quit group- the January 2014 Killers- has been down to 3 regular posters for some time, and a good couple handfuls of other badasses who post regularly with us. I'm really thankful for those others, each of then. Last night, i got to meet up with two rock solid quitters from among them- MN_Ben (who, along with Sh4string and I are all that remain from our other class) and Natro. These guys are both rock solid, and have been guides to many others.
It recharges a quit to meet up face to face, and it really was great to do it. Newer quitters, if at all possible, get to know other quitters face to face.It makes a world of difference.
and, today, i celebrate a milestone i personally hare always really liked--- day number 777-- a jackpot quit, a jumbp airliner quit day! QUIT ON!!!!
Enjoy the big Boeing quit day Brett!
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my quit group- the January 2014 Killers- has been down to 3 regular posters for some time, and a good couple handfuls of other badasses who post regularly with us. I'm really thankful for those others, each of then. Last night, i got to meet up with two rock solid quitters from among them- MN_Ben (who, along with Sh4string and I are all that remain from our other class) and Natro. These guys are both rock solid, and have been guides to many others.
It recharges a quit to meet up face to face, and it really was great to do it. Newer quitters, if at all possible, get to know other quitters face to face.It makes a world of difference.
and, today, i celebrate a milestone i personally hare always really liked--- day number 777-- a jackpot quit, a jumbp airliner quit day! QUIT ON!!!!
Enjoy the big Boeing quit day Brett!
x2 here Brett!
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my quit group- the January 2014 Killers- has been down to 3 regular posters for some time, and a good couple handfuls of other badasses who post regularly with us. I'm really thankful for those others, each of then. Last night, i got to meet up with two rock solid quitters from among them- MN_Ben (who, along with Sh4string and I are all that remain from our other class) and Natro. These guys are both rock solid, and have been guides to many others.
It recharges a quit to meet up face to face, and it really was great to do it. Newer quitters, if at all possible, get to know other quitters face to face.It makes a world of difference.
and, today, i celebrate a milestone i personally hare always really liked--- day number 777-- a jackpot quit, a jumbp airliner quit day! QUIT ON!!!!
Enjoy the big Boeing quit day Brett!
x2 here Brett!
Way to take flight today and own that day number.
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my quit group- the January 2014 Killers- has been down to 3 regular posters for some time, and a good couple handfuls of other badasses who post regularly with us. I'm really thankful for those others, each of then. Last night, i got to meet up with two rock solid quitters from among them- MN_Ben (who, along with Sh4string and I are all that remain from our other class) and Natro. These guys are both rock solid, and have been guides to many others.
It recharges a quit to meet up face to face, and it really was great to do it. Newer quitters, if at all possible, get to know other quitters face to face.It makes a world of difference.
and, today, i celebrate a milestone i personally hare always really liked--- day number 777-- a jackpot quit, a jumbp airliner quit day! QUIT ON!!!!
Enjoy the big Boeing quit day Brett!
x2 here Brett!
Way to take flight today and own that day number.
Sad, it's down to only 4...and you're only 2 years and almost 2 months quit. Yea, I just said "only." But that is one helluva core, a group I have the utmost respect. I've been proud to quit with that group of 4 for all my days quit and will forever be thankful for the core Killa's...especially you Brett. Although we haven't met in person (yet) I consider you my brother in quit and a friend in life.
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my quit group- the January 2014 Killers- has been down to 3 regular posters for some time, and a good couple handfuls of other badasses who post regularly with us. I'm really thankful for those others, each of then. Last night, i got to meet up with two rock solid quitters from among them- MN_Ben (who, along with Sh4string and I are all that remain from our other class) and Natro. These guys are both rock solid, and have been guides to many others.
It recharges a quit to meet up face to face, and it really was great to do it. Newer quitters, if at all possible, get to know other quitters face to face.It makes a world of difference.
and, today, i celebrate a milestone i personally hare always really liked--- day number 777-- a jackpot quit, a jumbp airliner quit day! QUIT ON!!!!
Enjoy the big Boeing quit day Brett!
x2 here Brett!
Way to take flight today and own that day number.
Sad, it's down to only 4...and you're only 2 years and almost 2 months quit. Yea, I just said "only." But that is one helluva core, a group I have the utmost respect. I've been proud to quit with that group of 4 for all my days quit and will forever be thankful for the core Killa's...especially you Brett. Although we haven't met in person (yet) I consider you my brother in quit and a friend in life.
What a ring of support here, still! Means so much to have each of you have my back!
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my quit group- the January 2014 Killers- has been down to 3 regular posters for some time, and a good couple handfuls of other badasses who post regularly with us. I'm really thankful for those others, each of then. Last night, i got to meet up with two rock solid quitters from among them- MN_Ben (who, along with Sh4string and I are all that remain from our other class) and Natro. These guys are both rock solid, and have been guides to many others.
It recharges a quit to meet up face to face, and it really was great to do it. Newer quitters, if at all possible, get to know other quitters face to face. It makes a world of difference.
and, today, i celebrate a milestone i personally have always really liked--- day number 777-- a jackpot quit, a jumbo airliner quit day! QUIT ON!!!!
'boob'
It was great to meet up :)
Hopefully the day comes we can do it again.
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
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Mondo Congrats!
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
Way to be Brett. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you! Four digits right around the corner!
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
Way to be Brett. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you! Four digits right around the corner!
Congrats on 900 days brother, glad to share these milestones with you.
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
Way to be Brett. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you! Four digits right around the corner!
Congrats on 900 days brother, glad to share these milestones with you.
Congrats on 900!!
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
Way to be Brett. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you! Four digits right around the corner!
Congrats on 900 days brother, glad to share these milestones with you.
Congrats on 900!!
Congrats on 900 today Brett. Enjoy today and know I am here with you fo every milestone as we crush them in the sesame day every time.
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
Way to be Brett. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you! Four digits right around the corner!
Congrats on 900 days brother, glad to share these milestones with you.
Congrats on 900!!
Congrats on 900 today Brett. Enjoy today and know I am here with you fo every milestone as we crush them in the sesame day every time.
Congratulations Brett! Keep giving back! 9th frigging floor!
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
Way to be Brett. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you! Four digits right around the corner!
Congrats on 900 days brother, glad to share these milestones with you.
Congrats on 900!!
Congrats on 900 today Brett. Enjoy today and know I am here with you fo every milestone as we crush them in the sesame day every time.
Congratulations Brett! Keep giving back! 9th frigging floor!
Don't let this guy's kind, genuine, friendly, give-you-the-shirt-off-his-back demeanor fool you for one second. He is one BAD - ASS - QUITTER! Congrats Brett!
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
Way to be Brett. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you! Four digits right around the corner!
Congrats on 900 days brother, glad to share these milestones with you.
Congrats on 900!!
Congrats on 900 today Brett. Enjoy today and know I am here with you fo every milestone as we crush them in the sesame day every time.
Congratulations Brett! Keep giving back! 9th frigging floor!
Don't let this guy's kind, genuine, friendly, give-you-the-shirt-off-his-back demeanor fool you for one second. He is one BAD - ASS - QUITTER! Congrats Brett!
Congrats Brett! Hell of a fine quit!
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
Way to be Brett. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you! Four digits right around the corner!
Congrats on 900 days brother, glad to share these milestones with you.
Congrats on 900!!
Congrats on 900 today Brett. Enjoy today and know I am here with you fo every milestone as we crush them in the sesame day every time.
Congratulations Brett! Keep giving back! 9th frigging floor!
Don't let this guy's kind, genuine, friendly, give-you-the-shirt-off-his-back demeanor fool you for one second. He is one BAD - ASS - QUITTER! Congrats Brett!
Congrats Brett! Hell of a fine quit!
WAY TO GO 900!!
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
Way to be Brett. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you! Four digits right around the corner!
Congrats on 900 days brother, glad to share these milestones with you.
Congrats on 900!!
Congrats on 900 today Brett. Enjoy today and know I am here with you fo every milestone as we crush them in the sesame day every time.
Congratulations Brett! Keep giving back! 9th frigging floor!
Don't let this guy's kind, genuine, friendly, give-you-the-shirt-off-his-back demeanor fool you for one second. He is one BAD - ASS - QUITTER! Congrats Brett!
Congrats Brett! Hell of a fine quit!
WAY TO GO 900!!
Way to go Red Horse Cock nice 9hundo keep up the great work enjoy your day. Thank you for always being there
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9TH FLOOR BADASS!
Dude congratulations on another well earned milestone. You keep me honest every day and have helped me and others not only quit, but heal. It is an honor to quit with you.
Brett, congrats on the 9th floor! And thanks for all the support you gave to me and many others. Celebrate. What the hell, buy a Broncos Super Bowl champs hoodie !!!
Way to be Brett. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you! Four digits right around the corner!
Congrats on 900 days brother, glad to share these milestones with you.
Congrats on 900!!
Congrats on 900 today Brett. Enjoy today and know I am here with you fo every milestone as we crush them in the sesame day every time.
Congratulations Brett! Keep giving back! 9th frigging floor!
Don't let this guy's kind, genuine, friendly, give-you-the-shirt-off-his-back demeanor fool you for one second. He is one BAD - ASS - QUITTER! Congrats Brett!
Congrats Brett! Hell of a fine quit!
WAY TO GO 900!!
Way to go Red Horse Cock nice 9hundo keep up the great work enjoy your day. Thank you for always being there
Thanks everyone! it's the people who support you that make all the difference- i couldn't ask for more than the congrats from each of you!
Quit on- let's all keep fighting this thing everywhere we can and each in our own best ways! Still pisses me off what big tobacco did to us, does to our fellow humans, and Congress lets them get away with. I'm FIGHTING for LIFE now!
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I want to add a little here as I go, as a record and to keep building my accountability network. What makes sense to me right now is to talk about symptoms because they are pretty big for me. I"m in day 8. I'm really in a fog a lot of the time. Feels light headed, almost dizzy, poor concentration. I'm good with it because I know I'll come out. My work suffers but so far that's ok.
A couple days ago i had a sore lymph node on one side. Of course i feared cancer. It's gone now, after only about a day. THen yesterday my mouth began noticably healing. Layers seem to be peeling off inside. Some minor sores. I've been here when I stopped before, And, the other side's lymph node is irritated. As long as nothing stays too long, i'm ok with all of these.
Gas keeps coming on too- especially at night. That's been a real factor in "stops" before sometimes- but this time it's tolerable. I just wish it would quit eventually.
I feel like I could stay on this site all day, make supportive friends, etc. That must be where my needs lie. But I have to work- been cruising around here long already. I"m very thankful for it though. Will go take a walk, see if I can blast some of this fog out for a bit and get to some work.
Congratulations on 1,000 days!!! Today is a huge milestone for this dude that embraces and embodies the values of this site... Brotherhood Accountability. That fog really did lift, and when it did, you've never looked back! Congratulations, Brett!
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I want to add a little here as I go, as a record and to keep building my accountability network. What makes sense to me right now is to talk about symptoms because they are pretty big for me. I"m in day 8. I'm really in a fog a lot of the time. Feels light headed, almost dizzy, poor concentration. I'm good with it because I know I'll come out. My work suffers but so far that's ok.
A couple days ago i had a sore lymph node on one side. Of course i feared cancer. It's gone now, after only about a day. THen yesterday my mouth began noticably healing. Layers seem to be peeling off inside. Some minor sores. I've been here when I stopped before, And, the other side's lymph node is irritated. As long as nothing stays too long, i'm ok with all of these.
Gas keeps coming on too- especially at night. That's been a real factor in "stops" before sometimes- but this time it's tolerable. I just wish it would quit eventually.
I feel like I could stay on this site all day, make supportive friends, etc. That must be where my needs lie. But I have to work- been cruising around here long already. I"m very thankful for it though. Will go take a walk, see if I can blast some of this fog out for a bit and get to some work.
Congratulations on 1,000 days!!! Today is a huge milestone for this dude that embraces and embodies the values of this site... Brotherhood Accountability. That fog really did lift, and when it did, you've never looked back! Congratulations, Brett!
Man, am I happy to see you hit this milestone Brett. You've been such a great supporter and friend to so many, I couldn't be happier for you. Congrats brother!
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I want to add a little here as I go, as a record and to keep building my accountability network. What makes sense to me right now is to talk about symptoms because they are pretty big for me. I"m in day 8. I'm really in a fog a lot of the time. Feels light headed, almost dizzy, poor concentration. I'm good with it because I know I'll come out. My work suffers but so far that's ok.
A couple days ago i had a sore lymph node on one side. Of course i feared cancer. It's gone now, after only about a day. THen yesterday my mouth began noticably healing. Layers seem to be peeling off inside. Some minor sores. I've been here when I stopped before, And, the other side's lymph node is irritated. As long as nothing stays too long, i'm ok with all of these.
Gas keeps coming on too- especially at night. That's been a real factor in "stops" before sometimes- but this time it's tolerable. I just wish it would quit eventually.
I feel like I could stay on this site all day, make supportive friends, etc. That must be where my needs lie. But I have to work- been cruising around here long already. I"m very thankful for it though. Will go take a walk, see if I can blast some of this fog out for a bit and get to some work.
Congratulations on 1,000 days!!! Today is a huge milestone for this dude that embraces and embodies the values of this site... Brotherhood Accountability. That fog really did lift, and when it did, you've never looked back! Congratulations, Brett!
Man, am I happy to see you hit this milestone Brett. You've been such a great supporter and friend to so many, I couldn't be happier for you. Congrats brother!
That's how you do that!!! Congrat Brett!!!!
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I want to add a little here as I go, as a record and to keep building my accountability network. What makes sense to me right now is to talk about symptoms because they are pretty big for me. I"m in day 8. I'm really in a fog a lot of the time. Feels light headed, almost dizzy, poor concentration. I'm good with it because I know I'll come out. My work suffers but so far that's ok.
A couple days ago i had a sore lymph node on one side. Of course i feared cancer. It's gone now, after only about a day. THen yesterday my mouth began noticably healing. Layers seem to be peeling off inside. Some minor sores. I've been here when I stopped before, And, the other side's lymph node is irritated. As long as nothing stays too long, i'm ok with all of these.
Gas keeps coming on too- especially at night. That's been a real factor in "stops" before sometimes- but this time it's tolerable. I just wish it would quit eventually.
I feel like I could stay on this site all day, make supportive friends, etc. That must be where my needs lie. But I have to work- been cruising around here long already. I"m very thankful for it though. Will go take a walk, see if I can blast some of this fog out for a bit and get to some work.
Congratulations on 1,000 days!!! Today is a huge milestone for this dude that embraces and embodies the values of this site... Brotherhood Accountability. That fog really did lift, and when it did, you've never looked back! Congratulations, Brett!
Man, am I happy to see you hit this milestone Brett. You've been such a great supporter and friend to so many, I couldn't be happier for you. Congrats brother!
That's how you do that!!! Congrat Brett!!!!
Congrats Brett! You have been such a strength and comfort to me . Thank you so much for everything. What a day!,,,, 'oh yeah'
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I want to add a little here as I go, as a record and to keep building my accountability network. What makes sense to me right now is to talk about symptoms because they are pretty big for me. I"m in day 8. I'm really in a fog a lot of the time. Feels light headed, almost dizzy, poor concentration. I'm good with it because I know I'll come out. My work suffers but so far that's ok.
A couple days ago i had a sore lymph node on one side. Of course i feared cancer. It's gone now, after only about a day. THen yesterday my mouth began noticably healing. Layers seem to be peeling off inside. Some minor sores. I've been here when I stopped before, And, the other side's lymph node is irritated. As long as nothing stays too long, i'm ok with all of these.
Gas keeps coming on too- especially at night. That's been a real factor in "stops" before sometimes- but this time it's tolerable. I just wish it would quit eventually.
I feel like I could stay on this site all day, make supportive friends, etc. That must be where my needs lie. But I have to work- been cruising around here long already. I"m very thankful for it though. Will go take a walk, see if I can blast some of this fog out for a bit and get to some work.
Congratulations on 1,000 days!!! Today is a huge milestone for this dude that embraces and embodies the values of this site... Brotherhood Accountability. That fog really did lift, and when it did, you've never looked back! Congratulations, Brett!
Man, am I happy to see you hit this milestone Brett. You've been such a great supporter and friend to so many, I couldn't be happier for you. Congrats brother!
That's how you do that!!! Congrat Brett!!!!
Congrats Brett! You have been such a strength and comfort to me . Thank you so much for everything. What a day!,,,, 'oh yeah'
Welcome to the Hall of Legends Brett!!!
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I want to add a little here as I go, as a record and to keep building my accountability network. What makes sense to me right now is to talk about symptoms because they are pretty big for me. I"m in day 8. I'm really in a fog a lot of the time. Feels light headed, almost dizzy, poor concentration. I'm good with it because I know I'll come out. My work suffers but so far that's ok.
A couple days ago i had a sore lymph node on one side. Of course i feared cancer. It's gone now, after only about a day. THen yesterday my mouth began noticably healing. Layers seem to be peeling off inside. Some minor sores. I've been here when I stopped before, And, the other side's lymph node is irritated. As long as nothing stays too long, i'm ok with all of these.
Gas keeps coming on too- especially at night. That's been a real factor in "stops" before sometimes- but this time it's tolerable. I just wish it would quit eventually.
I feel like I could stay on this site all day, make supportive friends, etc. That must be where my needs lie. But I have to work- been cruising around here long already. I"m very thankful for it though. Will go take a walk, see if I can blast some of this fog out for a bit and get to some work.
Congratulations on 1,000 days!!! Today is a huge milestone for this dude that embraces and embodies the values of this site... Brotherhood Accountability. That fog really did lift, and when it did, you've never looked back! Congratulations, Brett!
Man, am I happy to see you hit this milestone Brett. You've been such a great supporter and friend to so many, I couldn't be happier for you. Congrats brother!
That's how you do that!!! Congrat Brett!!!!
Congrats Brett! You have been such a strength and comfort to me . Thank you so much for everything. What a day!,,,, 'oh yeah'
Welcome to the Hall of Legends Brett!!!
Enjoy this day Breetles, you helped me so much in my quit! Thank you!
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I want to add a little here as I go, as a record and to keep building my accountability network. What makes sense to me right now is to talk about symptoms because they are pretty big for me. I"m in day 8. I'm really in a fog a lot of the time. Feels light headed, almost dizzy, poor concentration. I'm good with it because I know I'll come out. My work suffers but so far that's ok.
A couple days ago i had a sore lymph node on one side. Of course i feared cancer. It's gone now, after only about a day. THen yesterday my mouth began noticably healing. Layers seem to be peeling off inside. Some minor sores. I've been here when I stopped before, And, the other side's lymph node is irritated. As long as nothing stays too long, i'm ok with all of these.
Gas keeps coming on too- especially at night. That's been a real factor in "stops" before sometimes- but this time it's tolerable. I just wish it would quit eventually.
I feel like I could stay on this site all day, make supportive friends, etc. That must be where my needs lie. But I have to work- been cruising around here long already. I"m very thankful for it though. Will go take a walk, see if I can blast some of this fog out for a bit and get to some work.
Congratulations on 1,000 days!!! Today is a huge milestone for this dude that embraces and embodies the values of this site... Brotherhood Accountability. That fog really did lift, and when it did, you've never looked back! Congratulations, Brett!
Man, am I happy to see you hit this milestone Brett. You've been such a great supporter and friend to so many, I couldn't be happier for you. Congrats brother!
That's how you do that!!! Congrat Brett!!!!
Congrats Brett! You have been such a strength and comfort to me . Thank you so much for everything. What a day!,,,, 'oh yeah'
Welcome to the Hall of Legends Brett!!!
Enjoy this day Breetles, you helped me so much in my quit! Thank you!
So damn proud of you Brett! You continue to be a shining light through the fog for so many of us. Amazing to share this great day with you brother!
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I want to add a little here as I go, as a record and to keep building my accountability network. What makes sense to me right now is to talk about symptoms because they are pretty big for me. I"m in day 8. I'm really in a fog a lot of the time. Feels light headed, almost dizzy, poor concentration. I'm good with it because I know I'll come out. My work suffers but so far that's ok.
A couple days ago i had a sore lymph node on one side. Of course i feared cancer. It's gone now, after only about a day. THen yesterday my mouth began noticably healing. Layers seem to be peeling off inside. Some minor sores. I've been here when I stopped before, And, the other side's lymph node is irritated. As long as nothing stays too long, i'm ok with all of these.
Gas keeps coming on too- especially at night. That's been a real factor in "stops" before sometimes- but this time it's tolerable. I just wish it would quit eventually.
I feel like I could stay on this site all day, make supportive friends, etc. That must be where my needs lie. But I have to work- been cruising around here long already. I"m very thankful for it though. Will go take a walk, see if I can blast some of this fog out for a bit and get to some work.
Congratulations on 1,000 days!!! Today is a huge milestone for this dude that embraces and embodies the values of this site... Brotherhood Accountability. That fog really did lift, and when it did, you've never looked back! Congratulations, Brett!
Man, am I happy to see you hit this milestone Brett. You've been such a great supporter and friend to so many, I couldn't be happier for you. Congrats brother!
That's how you do that!!! Congrat Brett!!!!
Congrats Brett! You have been such a strength and comfort to me . Thank you so much for everything. What a day!,,,, 'oh yeah'
Welcome to the Hall of Legends Brett!!!
Enjoy this day Breetles, you helped me so much in my quit! Thank you!
So damn proud of you Brett! You continue to be a shining light through the fog for so many of us. Amazing to share this great day with you brother!
Dogpile!
Congrats to you my friend! So damn happy to see this and be a part of it with you!
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I want to add a little here as I go, as a record and to keep building my accountability network. What makes sense to me right now is to talk about symptoms because they are pretty big for me. I"m in day 8. I'm really in a fog a lot of the time. Feels light headed, almost dizzy, poor concentration. I'm good with it because I know I'll come out. My work suffers but so far that's ok.
A couple days ago i had a sore lymph node on one side. Of course i feared cancer. It's gone now, after only about a day. THen yesterday my mouth began noticably healing. Layers seem to be peeling off inside. Some minor sores. I've been here when I stopped before, And, the other side's lymph node is irritated. As long as nothing stays too long, i'm ok with all of these.
Gas keeps coming on too- especially at night. That's been a real factor in "stops" before sometimes- but this time it's tolerable. I just wish it would quit eventually.
I feel like I could stay on this site all day, make supportive friends, etc. That must be where my needs lie. But I have to work- been cruising around here long already. I"m very thankful for it though. Will go take a walk, see if I can blast some of this fog out for a bit and get to some work.
Congratulations on 1,000 days!!! Today is a huge milestone for this dude that embraces and embodies the values of this site... Brotherhood Accountability. That fog really did lift, and when it did, you've never looked back! Congratulations, Brett!
Man, am I happy to see you hit this milestone Brett. You've been such a great supporter and friend to so many, I couldn't be happier for you. Congrats brother!
That's how you do that!!! Congrat Brett!!!!
Congrats Brett! You have been such a strength and comfort to me . Thank you so much for everything. What a day!,,,, 'oh yeah'
Welcome to the Hall of Legends Brett!!!
Enjoy this day Breetles, you helped me so much in my quit! Thank you!
So damn proud of you Brett! You continue to be a shining light through the fog for so many of us. Amazing to share this great day with you brother!
Dogpile!
Congrats to you my friend! So damn happy to see this and be a part of it with you!
Wow! Now that's a big dangle! Congratulations! Thanks for helping me!
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Awesome job. FOUR DIGITS is sweet, Brett! Way to stack a quit! Proud of you for this, and for what you've paid back in the process!
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Awesome job. FOUR DIGITS is sweet, Brett! Way to stack a quit! Proud of you for this, and for what you've paid back in the process!
Atta baby Brett! Congrats!
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Awesome job. FOUR DIGITS is sweet, Brett! Way to stack a quit! Proud of you for this, and for what you've paid back in the process!
Atta baby Brett! Congrats!
Congrats on 1,000!
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Awesome job. FOUR DIGITS is sweet, Brett! Way to stack a quit! Proud of you for this, and for what you've paid back in the process!
Atta baby Brett! Congrats!
Congrats on 1,000!
'oh yeah' , 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah'
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Awesome job. FOUR DIGITS is sweet, Brett! Way to stack a quit! Proud of you for this, and for what you've paid back in the process!
Atta baby Brett! Congrats!
Congrats on 1,000!
'oh yeah' , 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah'
Congrats Brother!
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Awesome job. FOUR DIGITS is sweet, Brett! Way to stack a quit! Proud of you for this, and for what you've paid back in the process!
Atta baby Brett! Congrats!
Congrats on 1,000!
'oh yeah' , 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah'
Congrats Brother!
Missed this yday, congrats on 4 digits!
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Congrats on that Comma Brotha Brett. You have worked hard to get here. Thank you for your support and for always providing a great example of how this Quit should be done.
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Congrats on that Comma Brotha Brett. You have worked hard to get here. Thank you for your support and for always providing a great example of how this Quit should be done.
Although I texted with you a couple of times, I was away for work, but wanted to "document" on your intro how stoked I am for you. Congratulations brother. 'oh yeah'
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3 years of bad ass quit and healing here. This guy knows how to win.
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3 years of bad ass quit and healing here. This guy knows how to win.
Damn right! Way to go B!
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3 years of bad ass quit and healing here. This guy knows how to win.
Damn right! Way to go B!
'oh yeah' m'man Brett! Just keeps getting better and better. Congrats brother!
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3 years of bad ass quit and healing here. This guy knows how to win.
Damn right! Way to go B!
'oh yeah' m'man Brett! Just keeps getting better and better. Congrats brother!
Hell Ya Brett! Way to be!
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3 years of bad ass quit and healing here. This guy knows how to win.
Damn right! Way to go B!
'oh yeah' m'man Brett! Just keeps getting better and better. Congrats brother!
Hell Ya Brett! Way to be!
Believe that qualifies as stud material Brett!
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3 years of bad ass quit and healing here. This guy knows how to win.
Damn right! Way to go B!
'oh yeah' m'man Brett! Just keeps getting better and better. Congrats brother!
Hell Ya Brett! Way to be!
Believe that qualifies as stud material Brett!
Congrats on your 3 years man! Badassery!
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3 years of bad ass quit and healing here. This guy knows how to win.
Damn right! Way to go B!
'oh yeah' m'man Brett! Just keeps getting better and better. Congrats brother!
Hell Ya Brett! Way to be!
Believe that qualifies as stud material Brett!
Congrats on your 3 years man! Badassery!
Congrats Brett! It is amazing all you have accomplished during that time. Thank you for the steady support to me and KTC, brother.
CJ
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3 years of bad ass quit and healing here. This guy knows how to win.
Damn right! Way to go B!
'oh yeah' m'man Brett! Just keeps getting better and better. Congrats brother!
Hell Ya Brett! Way to be!
Believe that qualifies as stud material Brett!
Congrats on your 3 years man! Badassery!
Congrats Brett! It is amazing all you have accomplished during that time. Thank you for the steady support to me and KTC, brother.
CJ
Adding my congrats! Three years is killer. I still sometimes point new quitters to your signature block to read that article about how nicotine 'f's" with your head. You, sir, are a stud!
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3 years of bad ass quit and healing here. This guy knows how to win.
Damn right! Way to go B!
'oh yeah' m'man Brett! Just keeps getting better and better. Congrats brother!
Hell Ya Brett! Way to be!
Believe that qualifies as stud material Brett!
Congrats on your 3 years man! Badassery!
Congrats Brett! It is amazing all you have accomplished during that time. Thank you for the steady support to me and KTC, brother.
CJ
Adding my congrats! Three years is killer. I still sometimes point new quitters to your signature block to read that article about how nicotine 'f's" with your head. You, sir, are a stud!
Thank you all so much for the support! This life is SO much better and continues to amaze me! Freedom is better than I ever imagined- probably because I never knew freedom in my adult life. Three years is surreal. Now I can get cheaper insurance! Haha! Honestly I feel like I just hit one year a few weeks ago. The "game" really does slow down. But I still find that I need the tools at times, and I prefer the daily quit insurance policy of posting daily and keeping a network of quitters alive, to risking what I've built so far. Honestly I don't think I could go through what it took again, so I'll take the easy route and maintain it as good as possible. Keep quitting hard everyone, and if you are lurking, wondering, just jump in and quit with all your might. You can do it with the program here! Nothing else ever worked for me.
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3 years of bad ass quit and healing here. This guy knows how to win.
Damn right! Way to go B!
'oh yeah' m'man Brett! Just keeps getting better and better. Congrats brother!
Hell Ya Brett! Way to be!
Believe that qualifies as stud material Brett!
Congrats on your 3 years man! Badassery!
Congrats Brett! It is amazing all you have accomplished during that time. Thank you for the steady support to me and KTC, brother.
CJ
Adding my congrats! Three years is killer. I still sometimes point new quitters to your signature block to read that article about how nicotine 'f's" with your head. You, sir, are a stud!
Thank you all so much for the support! This life is SO much better and continues to amaze me! Freedom is better than I ever imagined- probably because I never knew freedom in my adult life. Three years is surreal. Now I can get cheaper insurance! Haha! Honestly I feel like I just hit one year a few weeks ago. The "game" really does slow down. But I still find that I need the tools at times, and I prefer the daily quit insurance policy of posting daily and keeping a network of quitters alive, to risking what I've built so far. Honestly I don't think I could go through what it took again, so I'll take the easy route and maintain it as good as possible. Keep quitting hard everyone, and if you are lurking, wondering, just jump in and quit with all your might. You can do it with the program here! Nothing else ever worked for me.
Congrats on 3 years Brett, proud to quit with you every day!
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Congrats on reaching the 14th floor today Brett. Well done!
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First: Happy 11th KTC. I"m soooo greatful. New quitters, follow the program, if i can do it you can too!
Second: For another cause i believe in 100%, I am requesting help from fellow Quitters and have a challenge--- ENDS SOON! I will shave my head totally bald if you help me reach my fundraising goal for a great community nonprofit in my home area, by Tuesday! For more info Click HERE! (https://www.classy.org/fundraiser/1186597)
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First: Happy 11th KTC. I"m soooo greatful. New quitters, follow the program, if i can do it you can too!
Second: For another cause i believe in 100%, I am requesting help from fellow Quitters and have a challenge--- ENDS SOON! I will shave my head totally bald if you help me reach my fundraising goal for a great community nonprofit in my home area, by Tuesday! For more info Click HERE! (https://www.classy.org/fundraiser/1186597)
Today's the last day for the "no hair" challenge- please consider clicking through and a donation, however small! Thanks quitters!
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First: Happy 11th KTC. I"m soooo greatful. New quitters, follow the program, if i can do it you can too!
Second: For another cause i believe in 100%, I am requesting help from fellow Quitters and have a challenge--- ENDS SOON! I will shave my head totally bald if you help me reach my fundraising goal for a great community nonprofit in my home area, by Tuesday! For more info Click HERE! (https://www.classy.org/fundraiser/1186597)
Ok, we extended the challenge. It's still on, through this TUESDAY-- please give me a little birthday gift, or an upcoming 1500 day quitversary gift, in the form of a donation to my fundraiser for a great charity. If i make my goal, i'll give $500 to KTC as well! Click above, at the link in the text , to go to the page. THANKS SO MUCH!
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2-0-0-0 days! I don’t post as much any more, but I still hit roll in Jan 2014 daily, and that is the secret. My quit is one of the best accomplishments in my life. I’ve been through all kinds of tests, but I stay quit thanks to the koolaid here, and the fellowship. If you are new or deciding whether to do it, just QUIT and follow the methods here. Go all in. I chewed for over 30 years, always failing to quit until I jumped in here. Come on, join us!
You CAN do it if you do what they say here.
It was the only way for me.
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2-0-0-0 days! I don’t post as much any more, but I still hit roll in Jan 2014 daily, and that is the secret. My quit is one of the best accomplishments in my life. I’ve been through all kinds of tests, but I stay quit thanks to the koolaid here, and the fellowship. If you are new or deciding whether to do it, just QUIT and follow the methods here. Go all in. I chewed for over 30 years, always failing to quit until I jumped in here. Come on, join us!
You CAN do it if you do what they say here.
It was the only way for me.
And p.s. I still get craves or urges. Some don’t at this point. I’m really good at smacking them down
By now though. You get good at it when you quit, with intention, daily.
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2000 days. Hot damn! If that ain't a challenge I'm willing to accept I don't know what is. I'll post my 2001 days in 5.5 years and hopefully inspire some other guy in his first 60 days like you just did me. Congrats brother, stay quit!
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Dangle #2!
Badass brother!
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Dangle #2!
Badass brother!
Thanks Bro your support has been a real cornerstone!
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2000 days. Hot damn! If that ain't a challenge I'm willing to accept I don't know what is. I'll post my 2001 days in 5.5 years and hopefully inspire some other guy in his first 60 days like you just did me. Congrats brother, stay quit!
Thanks so much sir and I’m glad you are inspired! One day at a time adds up! Be sure you let me know when you make it,
In case I forget to check! You will do it if you stay in the game each day here! Quitting with YOU today Rose!
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Today marks 6 years for me. It’s hard to believe. One single day at a time. If you are considering quitting, or new to it, please know that the more you put into it here, the better your chances. The method here works. Nothing else I ever did worked.
Build a network here of quitters in your group and other longer quits. Learn all you can about this awful addiction. Communicate all you can. I used this intro as a sort of diary to remind me later of the SUCK I went through, conquered, and never want to go through. It also let others know how I was doing, and helped them help me through tough times. I read a LOT of otter intros and learned that someone else always had it worse than me, and that others experienced every weird symptom that ever hit me. And that’s nothing too normal! Haha!
I keep posting still, and meet as many quitters as I can. It keeps me accountable, and I’ve made some friends for life. I’ve lost some friends too- to the damned disease from this addiction. But that makes me keep committed too. And new friends keep showing up in our Jan 14 class and otherwise. Go for it- you can have a better life without nicotine than you can even imagine if you have been hooked as long as I was!