KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Menace on November 23, 2013, 12:43:00 PM
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Figured it was time to post up my intro, been lurking for a little while now. I am currently 60 hours into my quit. I actually took my last dip on Tuesday November 19th but initially was going to try with the patch to help. I found this site with its recommendation to go cold turkey from the Nic Nic so after that first day with a patch I went CT. Gotta say it has not been fun at all and today's first thought upon awakening was for a dip of Cope. I think today is going to be a tough one.....but I only need to quit for today and I will worry about tomorrow, tomorrow! Been dipping since I was about 13 years old. Stopped after HS to only start smoking for a few years and then quit the smokes and went back to the dip. Started with Hawken, moved to Kodiak and have been with that bitch Cope now for about 17 years. Figured after 25 years of this crap, I need to move on with my life without her.
I am an addict, I love the taste of Cope, I love her smell, the way she looks at me. I remember that first date when she gave me that nice little buzz that made me feel warm all over. She was with me in class in High School, she was by my side during all those baseball games growing up. I can't remember how many campfires she has been to with me or keg parties when I was a teenager. She was even there the first time I made love to a woman I think, just hangin out in my pocket. She is so awesome, never complains about where or what I want to do with her, she just quietly rides along in my pocket. She has traveled with me all over this planet, giving me a refreshing boost of her Nic when needed. She has been with me during good times and bad times, my constant little friend in my pocket. So easy to use, so good to taste......That seductive little bitch, she doesn't want me to think about how much money I wasted on her or how much she really controls my life from her position of power, always in my pocket. Well you little vixen, we are done, over. I fucking QUIT, DO YOU HEAR ME, I QUIT.
The only Easy Day was Yesterday!
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Hey amigo, congrats on the decision to quit. Let me know if I can help you with anything. Check your inbox at the top right of the page.
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Figured it was time to post up my intro, been lurking for a little while now. I am currently 60 hours into my quit. I actually took my last dip on Tuesday November 19th but initially was going to try with the patch to help. I found this site with its recommendation to go cold turkey from the Nic Nic so after that first day with a patch I went CT. Gotta say it has not been fun at all and today's first thought upon awakening was for a dip of Cope. I think today is going to be a tough one.....but I only need to quit for today and I will worry about tomorrow, tomorrow! Been dipping since I was about 13 years old. Stopped after HS to only start smoking for a few years and then quit the smokes and went back to the dip. Started with Hawken, moved to Kodiak and have been with that bitch Cope now for about 17 years. Figured after 25 years of this crap, I need to move on with my life without her.
I am an addict, I love the taste of Cope, I love her smell, the way she looks at me. I remember that first date when she gave me that nice little buzz that made me feel warm all over. She was with me in class in High School, she was by my side during all those baseball games growing up. I can't remember how many campfires she has been to with me or keg parties when I was a teenager. She was even there the first time I made love to a woman I think, just hangin out in my pocket. She is so awesome, never complains about where or what I want to do with her, she just quietly rides along in my pocket. She has traveled with me all over this planet, giving me a refreshing boost of her Nic when needed. She has been with me during good times and bad times, my constant little friend in my pocket. So easy to use, so good to taste......That seductive little bitch, she doesn't want me to think about how much money I wasted on her or how much she really controls my life from her position of power, always in my pocket. Well you little vixen, we are done, over. I fucking QUIT, DO YOU HEAR ME, I QUIT.
The only Easy Day was Yesterday!
Welcome to KTC, read up on the site. Hit the welcome center and just spend all your free time here.
First things first, your love affair has to end. That can has done nothing for you. Trust me I use to think just like you. I am 269 days in on a 24 year habit.
Learn to hate her, the nic is a whore. She stole your money, she stole your life, your freedom and made you a salve to her. Clam your life back and realize it was all bullshit. She has done nothing for you but filled you with a material that could kill you and steal your money.
I quit with you today. Hit me up if you need anything.
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Congrats on a great decision. Lets take a look at some things that will help you. First off, you stated.
I think today is going to be a tough one
Then you went on to state how you need to take it one day at a time. I say, break it down farther my friend. A crave normally lasts less than 5 minutes, so just worry about this second my friend. Some seconds will be easier than other seconds, but the fact is this second is all you need to think about.
I love the taste of Cope, I love her smell, the way she looks at me.
This ^^^ thinking will change with time. Learn to hate the poison. It has done absolutely nothing for you except take. It started with your money, then added time from your family and years of slavery. The only thing the poison does is fill the hole it created. The poison continues to take until there is nothing left (literally). I've learned to hate the poison and you can to. It looks like dirt, smells like death and I will not dwell on the taste. To think about the taste puts tears in my eyes. The taste means SLAVER again. I have been free for 282 days and love my freedom.
Read, read and read everything you can on nicotine and addiction. Began learning the truth. Learn your enemy, it knows you. Right now you are what I call tin headed. That needs to change if you want to be successful.
60 hours is a great beginning. Keep your head pointed forward and stick with your plan, because it's a good one. Need a number let me know. Glad to be quit with you.
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Figured it was time to post up my intro, been lurking for a little while now. I am currently 60 hours into my quit. I actually took my last dip on Tuesday November 19th but initially was going to try with the patch to help. I found this site with its recommendation to go cold turkey from the Nic Nic so after that first day with a patch I went CT. Gotta say it has not been fun at all and today's first thought upon awakening was for a dip of Cope. I think today is going to be a tough one.....but I only need to quit for today and I will worry about tomorrow, tomorrow! Been dipping since I was about 13 years old. Stopped after HS to only start smoking for a few years and then quit the smokes and went back to the dip. Started with Hawken, moved to Kodiak and have been with that bitch Cope now for about 17 years. Figured after 25 years of this crap, I need to move on with my life without her.
I am an addict, I love the taste of Cope, I love her smell, the way she looks at me. I remember that first date when she gave me that nice little buzz that made me feel warm all over. She was with me in class in High School, she was by my side during all those baseball games growing up. I can't remember how many campfires she has been to with me or keg parties when I was a teenager. She was even there the first time I made love to a woman I think, just hangin out in my pocket. She is so awesome, never complains about where or what I want to do with her, she just quietly rides along in my pocket. She has traveled with me all over this planet, giving me a refreshing boost of her Nic when needed. She has been with me during good times and bad times, my constant little friend in my pocket. So easy to use, so good to taste......That seductive little bitch, she doesn't want me to think about how much money I wasted on her or how much she really controls my life from her position of power, always in my pocket. Well you little vixen, we are done, over. I fucking QUIT, DO YOU HEAR ME, I QUIT.
The only Easy Day was Yesterday!
Welcome to KTC, read up on the site. Hit the welcome center and just spend all your free time here.
First things first, your love affair has to end. That can has done nothing for you. Trust me I use to think just like you. I am 269 days in on a 24 year habit.
Learn to hate her, the nic is a whore. She stole your money, she stole your life, your freedom and made you a salve to her. Clam your life back and realize it was all bullshit. She has done nothing for you but filled you with a material that could kill you and steal your money.
I quit with you today. Hit me up if you need anything.
Welcome Menace! I agree with KKLJ, you need to learn the facts about your love for nic. The only positive thing you might have gotten from nicotine is staying regular (natural laxative). Your addict brain simply associates good feelings and things with dip, when in reality it is a negative relationship. Any good feelings were just a reduction in the withdraw symptoms whenever you threw a fatty in. Nic dominated your thoughts, trashes you health, teeth, makes you a liar. Do those sound like good things? Understanding addiction is the best way to managing it. I quit with you today!
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M-Menace...welcome, man! Awesome to have you. The replies you got here are dead on. Your thinking will change. Your body must physically withdrawal from that seductive bitch, but after a couple weeks of it, it will get easier.
One of the things that really helps me is keeping a can of Smokey Mountain Herbal Snuff close by. They offer lots of flavors and it's crazy how similar it is to the real thing. You can even find it retail at Wal-Mart.
Good luck in your quit, bro. ODAAT (One Day At A Time). PM me if you want some digits to text in a bind. I'll talk you off the cliff :)
Only Easy Day Was Yesterday! You can do this!
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Figured it was time to post up my intro, been lurking for a little while now. I am currently 60 hours into my quit. I actually took my last dip on Tuesday November 19th but initially was going to try with the patch to help. I found this site with its recommendation to go cold turkey from the Nic Nic so after that first day with a patch I went CT. Gotta say it has not been fun at all and today's first thought upon awakening was for a dip of Cope. I think today is going to be a tough one.....but I only need to quit for today and I will worry about tomorrow, tomorrow! Been dipping since I was about 13 years old. Stopped after HS to only start smoking for a few years and then quit the smokes and went back to the dip. Started with Hawken, moved to Kodiak and have been with that bitch Cope now for about 17 years. Figured after 25 years of this crap, I need to move on with my life without her.
I am an addict, I love the taste of Cope, I love her smell, the way she looks at me. I remember that first date when she gave me that nice little buzz that made me feel warm all over. She was with me in class in High School, she was by my side during all those baseball games growing up. I can't remember how many campfires she has been to with me or keg parties when I was a teenager. She was even there the first time I made love to a woman I think, just hangin out in my pocket. She is so awesome, never complains about where or what I want to do with her, she just quietly rides along in my pocket. She has traveled with me all over this planet, giving me a refreshing boost of her Nic when needed. She has been with me during good times and bad times, my constant little friend in my pocket. So easy to use, so good to taste......That seductive little bitch, she doesn't want me to think about how much money I wasted on her or how much she really controls my life from her position of power, always in my pocket. Well you little vixen, we are done, over. I fucking QUIT, DO YOU HEAR ME, I QUIT.
The only Easy Day was Yesterday!
Damn Menace,
I thought I romanced the Kodiak bear in my intro, holy shit..... What will happen as you put some +1's together is that you will realize that the nic (cope) bitch is a nasty crack whore with not teeth and her snatch falling out from some kind of awful venereal disease.
She has lied to us for years telling us "just one more" and "you'll quit tomorrow" Don't believe her lies, like Srans said with time you will hate it, hate that you were a slave to something that was slowly killing you.
Quitting is hard and you will feel foggy and out of sorts for a bit, it will ease up after the first 72 hours though as your body is detoxing. Stay close to site and reach out to the guys sending you their number, they will save your ass if you let them. Check your inbox for mine as well, I'll quit with you today!
I also see you have not posted roll yet.
Check out here: Welcome Center (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showforum=13)
Then head over to the February '14 pre HOF quit group (60 hours puts your quit date at 11/21 if my math is on point?). They will be your brothers battling through that first 100 days together.
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Thanks to all for the support and encouragement. I'm still quit right now and have no intention of folding today............
I just about lit some guy up at the grocery store though.....You might get a kick out of this. It started because he was being a dick to the deli counter help. I was standing nearby getting some meat and cheese. He was a dude using one of those powered carts because he is overweight and out of shape. He looked about 60, my guess is early 50's though. Anyway after he tossed the item he was looking at back into the display and basically shouted a the employees about crappy customer service he rolled by me...............this was after an earlier episode of being a jerk 2 minutes ago at the same counter BTW.
I had to say something..... 'bang head' .....I did......
Told him to quit being such an asshole to people and he might get better service. He didn't like my comment and old fat boy can apparently walk because he got out of the cart quick enough and walked over to me. He asked if I had a problem. I told him that I didn't have a problem, but he might want to stop being such a jerk. I stood my ground staring right at him. He decided that today was a good day to leave the grocery store in one piece apparently and walked away. The deli guys both told me thanks! I told them, I know you can't say it, but I can. A manager then came over to speak with the jerk and couldn't make him happy either, he then came over and apologized to me for this customers behavior. I told him that he didn't need to apologize for some other asshats behavior. Some people must really hate life..........
Got home and told the wife about this and she told me that it was a good thing that he walked away. I agreed, it could have gotten real ugly, trying to piss into my Wheaties today... :blink:
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Thanks to all for the support and encouragement. I'm still quit right now and have no intention of folding today............
I just about lit some guy up at the grocery store though.....You might get a kick out of this. It started because he was being a dick to the deli counter help. I was standing nearby getting some meat and cheese. He was a dude using one of those powered carts because he is overweight and out of shape. He looked about 60, my guess is early 50's though. Anyway after he tossed the item he was looking at back into the display and basically shouted a the employees about crappy customer service he rolled by me...............this was after an earlier episode of being a jerk 2 minutes ago at the same counter BTW.
I had to say something..... 'bang head' .....I did......
Told him to quit being such an asshole to people and he might get better service. He didn't like my comment and old fat boy can apparently walk because he got out of the cart quick enough and walked over to me. He asked if I had a problem. I told him that I didn't have a problem, but he might want to stop being such a jerk. I stood my ground staring right at him. He decided that today was a good day to leave the grocery store in one piece apparently and walked away. The deli guys both told me thanks! I told them, I know you can't say it, but I can. A manager then came over to speak with the jerk and couldn't make him happy either, he then came over and apologized to me for this customers behavior. I told him that he didn't need to apologize for some other asshats behavior. Some people must really hate life..........
Got home and told the wife about this and she told me that it was a good thing that he walked away. I agreed, it could have gotten real ugly, trying to piss into my Wheaties today... :blink:
Nice work there. I always tell myself that I am surrounded by assholes. Irony always do the right thing but when. See anyone man or woman acting a fool when someone is doing their job and trying to please the customer I jump right in and let my opinion be known.
There have been several times in public that I had a similar experience. Well done bro, now use that same bravado and gumption to propel your quit daily.
The now if some asshole tries to impact your quit don't hesitate, clean their damn clock!
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Well I posted my first roll call in the February group since my actual quit day was 11/20/13. Not sure I did it right, but my name is on the bottom of the list. If I messed up hopefully someone can direct me on how to properly post roll.........
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Well I posted my first roll call in the February group since my actual quit day was 11/20/13. Not sure I did it right, but my name is on the bottom of the list. If I messed up hopefully someone can direct me on how to properly post roll.........
Looks like you did fine Menace except that if you quit on 11/20 your on Day 4 today! Don't sweat it though, we've all messed up roll call, bumped someone off it.... etc etc.
The important thing is you show up and post everyday, you'll get the hang of it in no time. Stay involved, offer to help out with the group spreadsheet. Whatever it takes to stay quit. It will get better, I promise.
One of our mods is fond of saying "It will suck until it doesn't, then it won't" Post early, keep your promise, brighter days ahead.
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Well I posted my first roll call in the February group since my actual quit day was 11/20/13. Not sure I did it right, but my name is on the bottom of the list. If I messed up hopefully someone can direct me on how to properly post roll.........
Looks like you did fine Menace except that if you quit on 11/20 your on Day 4 today! Don't sweat it though, we've all messed up roll call, bumped someone off it.... etc etc.
The important thing is you show up and post everyday, you'll get the hang of it in no time. Stay involved, offer to help out with the group spreadsheet. Whatever it takes to stay quit. It will get better, I promise.
One of our mods is fond of saying "It will suck until it doesn't, then it won't" Post early, keep your promise, brighter days ahead.
You have confused me, its 11/23 I think so if my quit day was 11/20 then this would be day three I think? Anyway the day is a bit of a blur so who knows........STILL QUIT!
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Well I posted my first roll call in the February group since my actual quit day was 11/20/13. Not sure I did it right, but my name is on the bottom of the list. If I messed up hopefully someone can direct me on how to properly post roll.........
Looks like you did fine Menace except that if you quit on 11/20 your on Day 4 today! Don't sweat it though, we've all messed up roll call, bumped someone off it.... etc etc.
The important thing is you show up and post everyday, you'll get the hang of it in no time. Stay involved, offer to help out with the group spreadsheet. Whatever it takes to stay quit. It will get better, I promise.
One of our mods is fond of saying "It will suck until it doesn't, then it won't" Post early, keep your promise, brighter days ahead.
You have confused me, its 11/23 I think so if my quit day was 11/20 then this would be day three I think? Anyway the day is a bit of a blur so who knows........STILL QUIT!
Welcome to quit Menace. Stick around, these boys will show you how its done. Read, read, read man, the goods are here.
Let me help you with your day count.
11/20 Day 1
11/21 Day 2
11/22 Day 3
11/23 Day 4
It's called the fog man, don't sweat it, we have ALL been thru it. The good news is that soon the poison will be completely out of your system. It is all a mental mind game after that.
You can do this, I quit with you.
Ryan
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Well I posted my first roll call in the February group since my actual quit day was 11/20/13. Not sure I did it right, but my name is on the bottom of the list. If I messed up hopefully someone can direct me on how to properly post roll.........
Looks like you did fine Menace except that if you quit on 11/20 your on Day 4 today! Don't sweat it though, we've all messed up roll call, bumped someone off it.... etc etc.
The important thing is you show up and post everyday, you'll get the hang of it in no time. Stay involved, offer to help out with the group spreadsheet. Whatever it takes to stay quit. It will get better, I promise.
One of our mods is fond of saying "It will suck until it doesn't, then it won't" Post early, keep your promise, brighter days ahead.
You have confused me, its 11/23 I think so if my quit day was 11/20 then this would be day three I think? Anyway the day is a bit of a blur so who knows........STILL QUIT!
Welcome to quit Menace. Stick around, these boys will show you how its done. Read, read, read man, the goods are here.
Let me help you with your day count.
11/20 Day 1
11/21 Day 2
11/22 Day 3
11/23 Day 4
It's called the fog man, don't sweat it, we have ALL been thru it. The good news is that soon the poison will be completely out of your system. It is all a mental mind game after that.
You can do this, I quit with you.
Ryan
Welcome menace. I had trouble counting early too. Just get your name on roll every day brother. You can do this! QLF today!
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Great decision you've made, Menace. Invest in your growing hatred of nicotine, and you'll find each moment's quit easier to get through. Like you, I've been addicted to her for a long time, and really must have thought I loved her, yet she only gave me deceit, lies and fear. She'll come begging for you to take her back, don't believe her evil whispers. Don't look back, and keep her at bay moment by moment, hour by hour, and day by day.
I'm glad to be quit with you today!
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Thanks everyone, today has been a bit of a bitch......just finished dinner and wanted to throw a big fatty in my mouth so bad.........fuck........ 'bang head'
But no cave tonight bitch......I'm loving the Dill Pickle Spitz Seeds instead........
Thanks again for the encouragement fellas
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Thanks everyone, today has been a bit of a bitch......just finished dinner and wanted to throw a big fatty in my mouth so bad.........fuck........ 'bang head'
But no cave tonight bitch......I'm loving the Dill Pickle Spitz Seeds instead........
Thanks again for the encouragement fellas
You can do this M.
ODAAT. NAFAR.
read all you can here daily.
gather your weapons to beat the nic bitch daily.
we were not born with the poison in our mouth!
Remember one problem + nicotine = 2 problems.
Do anything to "not" put the poison in your mouth. Cat turds saw dust gum red bots peanuts aluminum cans. Anything tonnotnuse the poison.
cheers. You got this.
Learn to hate nicotine and everything about it. It gets better. I promise.
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Welcome to quitting. It's absolutely the best thing you can to for yourself. If you need hel hit meup any time. BTW, I love the dill pickle seeds. I eat about 6 lbs per week
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I'm with ya menace, good group here, stay on this site as much as you can. Loved reading your intro. Mogul
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Woke up today and thought, I need to post roll, first thought I had. Then got in the shower to get ready and while standing there, I realized that I had not even thought about having a dip yet..... 'no'
Way cool......I quit today with all of you!
The only easy day was yesterday.
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Nice, isn't it? Let freedom from nicotine smile with us all today today Menace.
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Wait til you wake up one morning and forget to brush your teeth. You WILL do this because your mouth doesn't taste like a wild boar shit in it, and your tongue doesn't feel like it was used as toilet paper.
Menace, I'm sorry. I'm a gross individual.
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Wait til you wake up one morning and forget to brush your teeth. You WILL do this because your mouth doesn't taste like a wild boar shit in it, and your tongue doesn't feel like it was used as toilet paper.
Menace, I'm sorry. I'm a gross individual.
There isn't anything you could say on here to offend me brother....no worries........
I quit today with you!
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Glad you made it thru the day Menace. Just keep putting up plus ones and you will find yourself on the winning team.
Keep up bud the freedom is worth it, I promise.
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Keep going day by day Menace. The nic bitch kept me in an affair with Cope for years too, so I've been linked in with your quit since reading your intro. You're doing good so far leaving that bitch behind- keep up up! Each new challenge is an opportunity to teach that conniving bitch that she can't trick you back into her grips.
Glad to quit the bitch with you today!
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Enjoy that Victory... Many more to come, brother. You are on the path... keep knocking the nic-bitch down.
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Thanks guys for the support, it does really help to hear from peeps in the know, even if its just a quick word of encouragement....... Today has been a bit more challenging then yesterday, cravings were more frequent and stronger. I know the days will always be different, some more challenging then others. Thats my life as a Nic Addict, I accept that. But ODAAT is my creed and today I am going to bed Nic free...........
The only easy day was yesterday......
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Thanks guys for the support, it does really help to hear from peeps in the know, even if its just a quick word of encouragement....... Today has been a bit more challenging then yesterday, cravings were more frequent and stronger. I know the days will always be different, some more challenging then others. Thats my life as a Nic Addict, I accept that. But ODAAT is my creed and today I am going to bed Nic free...........
The only easy day was yesterday......
Day 6 man.. you got this!
You are settling into your real "quit" now, the battle is just beginning.....the good news is your not alone and you only have to worry about today.
Stay close to the website and abuse those phone numbers you've gotten (seriously, text me anytime just to bullshit), you'll want to train yourself to reach out because when you reach a serious hurdle you'll need someone.
I had a crave early on at a store with my family that just about brought me to my knees, at one point I even told myself I could tough it out by myself. I knew that was the nic bitch lying to me and I texted a couple quitters. I will never forget that crave and how I felt, it was so strong it almost brought me to tears. I will not allow that poison to have that power over me again, not for today anyway.
Quit with you today Menace!
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Day 7 has been a BITCH.....Day 4,5,6 were better. Most likely because I went back to work for the first time since my quit and work is where I dipped the most. I was in the QT today and couldn't even force myself to look behind the counter at all the Tobacco. Kept my eyes down on the counter. I purchased my tea and got the hell out of there......Bottom line ODAAT and I made it today. I quit with you all.....Thanks
The Only Easy day was Yesterday!
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Nice job sticking to your quit, Menace. Work may well have been your trigger, but some days you'll get the craves for no real reason. Regardless of why, just focus on the day, hour, or even the minute of temptation. Glad to be quit with you today.
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Day 8 is just about over and it was a tad easier then day 7 but still quite a few craves to kick in the teeth. Freedom from Nicotine is the goal.........Happy Thanksgiving to all and anyone reading this who might need some support, I'm available just send a PM.
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Day 8 is just about over and it was a tad easier then day 7 but still quite a few craves to kick in the teeth. Freedom from Nicotine is the goal.........Happy Thanksgiving to all and anyone reading this who might need some support, I'm available just send a PM.
Relish in the pain and misery of your first two weeks. It should hurt. Then our simple circuit brains wont motivate our paws to put dp in face again. That being said, i know it hurts. Check out Moguls intro sometime. Thats smashmouth approach to pavlovian rewiring.
-grizzfall
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Menace - The holidays are approaching. Do you have a good quit plan in place? Get ready because the nic b likes to sneak up on you during these get together family times. Have a plan and stay quit. Check you pm's for my contact info. Hit me up if you get in a bind. I will do the same.
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Made it through the Turkey Day without too much issue to be honest. Well I worked my normal 10 hour shift as well so that might have helped. Had to beat the Nic Bitch down a bit after the big turkey dinner as I am sure all of you quitters did. I now embark on another challenging day and look forward to stomping her guts out some more.......thanks for the support fellas and the quick text Dave.
The only easy day was yesterday..........
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Made it through the Turkey Day without too much issue to be honest. Well I worked my normal 10 hour shift as well so that might have helped. Had to beat the Nic Bitch down a bit after the big turkey dinner as I am sure all of you quitters did. I now embark on another challenging day and look forward to stopping her guts out some more.......thanks for the support fellas and the quick text Dave.
The only easy day was yesterday..........
You can do this ODAAT.
This is my first and last quit. I get the feeling it is Yours too!
Good to see another hater of nicotine.
Cheers to you and your family.
I quit Today with You M. Just today.
Tomorrow isn't real, we don't do the past,
Today is a gift, that's why it's called The Present".
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Day 10 is almost in the books.....I did have a handful of craves today. I have a nasty cold so I have been kind of sitting around which makes it a bit worse. Happy to say that I have stomped nicbitch into the ground today however 'na na'
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Day 10 is almost in the books.....I did have a handful of craves today. I have a nasty cold so I have been kind of sitting around which makes it a bit worse. Happy to say that I have stomped nicbitch into the ground today however 'na na'
Hell yeah bro, screw that nic bitch. It can eat a fat turd. It was begging at my feet today and I shooed it away like I was royalty and it was a worthless peasant. I feel bad for all the nic users in my life. They are enslaved and don't even know it.
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Just wanted to update my post here for the sake of keeping a bit of a timeline. I enter Day 13 today. Looking back to yesterday, (D12) it went pretty good considering it was a day of work that was a huge friggin trigger, stuck in one place outside for 7 hours while not doing a whole lot. This was prime dipping time normally. I gotta say that Nic Bitch was whispering in my ear a bunch, the craves were not that strong but man they were coming in droves, she was trying to get me with multiple little sneak attacks. It wash't easy but I STOMPED HER GUTS OUT THOUGH and remain Nic Free...........
I quit with you all today............ 'oh yeah'
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Those are words of a man winning the battle. Keep it up, and maintain your guard!
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M, you are winning. You have strung together almost 2 weeks worth of nic free days. It could be a fluke if it was 1 day; a coincidence if it was 2 or 3 days, but 13 days of quit? No reason not to wake up and do it again. You will most likely never have days as bad as 1-3 so there is no reason to cave ever. Mind games now, that's all that it is. Not to say you won't have fights in your future, but you have the tools to win every time. Do not forget what has been working for you.
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I wanted to bump up your question tho Jake in your thread and answer it for you
(Quote by M-Menace)
Jake,
I am new here on the KTC, posted day 21 today so I don't know your history all that much except what I gleaned from reading this intro thread. I read these disheartening threads in an attempt to learn and identify what happened to someone that can reach the HOF and then fail. It scares me to be honest, because I have quit previously for 3-4 months, I can't remember as it didn't seem important at the time. I fear the failure even after being quit for a long time. I have been dipping for like 20+ years now and approach my 41st Birthday the end of this month. God willing I want to be around for at least another 30 to watch my kids grow up and have their own kids and do so in a healthy manner with some vitality and strength so I can really enjoy it. Anyway I think it helps when someone like you, who caves explains in an honest fashion as to how it happened. So people like me can learn how to guard against and prepare to stomp on that cave. I realize KTC gives us many tools but there is always room to learn from other peoples failures if they provide honest facts/circumstances of the incident, i.e.; they own up to what really happened without excuses. Sometimes we as humans like to sugar coat the truth! I guess you can take this or leave it but this is my advice to you. Not as a quitter who has any right to provide advice yet to anyone else quitting, but as a man with an addiction myself (actually as a man with an addictive personality in general). Swallow your pride man, it is one of the toughest things a man can do, yet it can lead to one of the greatest transformations in your life. We all struggle with our pride, justifying our behavior even when it is poor, thinking we are better or stronger then someone else, not asking for help when we should, trying to look better and more successful to friends and family then we really are. Pride is a human fault, given to us at birth but if we work on it, we can control or at least limit it's control of us, if we don't it will control us and wreak havoc in all facets of our life. (This is sometimes called the Victim mentality as well) I wish you nothing but success in your quit because I think everyone deserves to be freed from the slavery of Nicotine regardless of how many tries it might take but swallow the pride and eat a little humble pie with me because I too have to work on controlling my pride every day, pride is just about as sneaky at the Nic Bitch.....ODAAT
(Quote LionHeartedGirl)
M-M, I've never caved but I was a serial stopper before I quit. I'm a firm believer that you only quit once so even though I thought I had before and started again many, many times, I'm with AppleJack and can very honestly say this is the ONLY time I have quit and I won't ever cave. And that's the crux I think of our frustration... It's NOT okay to "try, try again". Once I figured out I'm an addict and understood that ONE is too much, then it takes the option off the table. I do it one day at a time by posting roll here. And most days, I don't "need" to make that promise. Most days it's so easy that I can kinda understand why people walk away from this site. Most days I know I won't face any temptation and my quit feels rock solid.
But I still post roll on those days because life has a sneaky way of turning on a dime. Truthfully, I didn't post roll this morning because I'm fighting temptation. I posted roll because 2 months from now I might. Or two years from now. And when that day hits (and it will), it will be easy to make a different choice than Jake made because I will have taken nicotine use off the table.
You do not need to he afraid M-M. There is nothing to fear because today you posted roll and made a promise. And tomorrow you will do the same. And I would recommend, that you don't think in terms of making it 100 days or 4 months or a year. You think about today. Stick around. Keep reading. Keep learning. On another group I post in we celebrated 1500 days for a guy... These celebrations happen all the time around here. They happen one day at a time though.
You're right. Jake should do a better job at explaining to himself and his group what happened but don't worry about that happening to you. He decided after HOF that he had it beat. He was clear. I don't believe Jake ever really understood his addiction. I don't think he does today. If he did, he wouldn't have turned his back on his quit.
I've said this before and I'll say it again... KTC doesn't keep your mind on nicotine...it keeps your mind in your QUIT. And that should not stop after 100 days.
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I wanted to bump up your question tho Jake in your thread and answer it for you
      (Quote by M-Menace)
Jake,
I am new here on the KTC, posted day 21 today so I don't know your history all that much except what I gleaned from reading this intro thread. I read these disheartening threads in an attempt to learn and identify what happened to someone that can reach the HOF and then fail. It scares me to be honest, because I have quit previously for 3-4 months, I can't remember as it didn't seem important at the time. I fear the failure even after being quit for a long time. I have been dipping for like 20+ years now and approach my 41st Birthday the end of this month. God willing I want to be around for at least another 30 to watch my kids grow up and have their own kids and do so in a healthy manner with some vitality and strength so I can really enjoy it. Anyway I think it helps when someone like you, who caves explains in an honest fashion as to how it happened. So people like me can learn how to guard against and prepare to stomp on that cave. I realize KTC gives us many tools but there is always room to learn from other peoples failures if they provide honest facts/circumstances of the incident, i.e.; they own up to what really happened without excuses. Sometimes we as humans like to sugar coat the truth! I guess you can take this or leave it but this is my advice to you. Not as a quitter who has any right to provide advice yet to anyone else quitting, but as a man with an addiction myself (actually as a man with an addictive personality in general). Swallow your pride man, it is one of the toughest things a man can do, yet it can lead to one of the greatest transformations in your life. We all struggle with our pride, justifying our behavior even when it is poor, thinking we are better or stronger then someone else, not asking for help when we should, trying to look better and more successful to friends and family then we really are. Pride is a human fault, given to us at birth but if we work on it, we can control or at least limit it's control of us, if we don't it will control us and wreak havoc in all facets of our life. (This is sometimes called the Victim mentality as well) I wish you nothing but success in your quit because I think everyone deserves to be freed from the slavery of Nicotine regardless of how many tries it might take but swallow the pride and eat a little humble pie with me because I too have to work on controlling my pride every day, pride is just about as sneaky at the Nic Bitch.....ODAAT
          (Quote LionHeartedGirl)
M-M, I've never caved but I was a serial stopper before I quit. I'm a firm believer that you only quit once so even though I thought I had before and started again many, many times, I'm with AppleJack and can very honestly say this is the ONLY time I have quit and I won't ever cave. And that's the crux I think of our frustration... It's NOT okay to "try, try again". Once I figured out I'm an addict and understood that ONE is too much, then it takes the option off the table. I do it one day at a time by posting roll here. And most days, I don't "need" to make that promise. Most days it's so easy that I can kinda understand why people walk away from this site. Most days I know I won't face any temptation and my quit feels rock solid.
But I still post roll on those days because life has a sneaky way of turning on a dime. Truthfully, I didn't post roll this morning because I'm fighting temptation. I posted roll because 2 months from now I might. Or two years from now. And when that day hits (and it will), it will be easy to make a different choice than Jake made because I will have taken nicotine use off the table.
You do not need to he afraid M-M. There is nothing to fear because today you posted roll and made a promise. And tomorrow you will do the same. And I would recommend, that you don't think in terms of making it 100 days or 4 months or a year. You think about today. Stick around. Keep reading. Keep learning. On another group I post in we celebrated 1500 days for a guy... These celebrations happen all the time around here. They happen one day at a time though.
You're right. Jake should do a better job at explaining to himself and his group what happened but don't worry about that happening to you. He decided after HOF that he had it beat. He was clear. I don't believe Jake ever really understood his addiction. I don't think he does today. If he did, he wouldn't have turned his back on his quit.
I've said this before and I'll say it again... KTC doesn't keep your mind on nicotine...it keeps your mind in your QUIT. And that should not stop after 100 days.
MM,
My answer is just to repeat exactly what the BadAss quitter above posted. And simply add, Jake's cave struck us all! He never 100% closed that door, which is a shame since he accepted a conductor position, pretended to be a leader, and busted others balls for far less than his own actions.
I believe Jake never really wanted to quit, if you want to quit you can, if you want to dip you can!
More important: if you want to quit you will, if you want to dip you will!
I think LHG said it but to reiterate those whom are serious don't leave KTC those who aren't leave, and many cave. We all hope Jake Quits, but have moved on to focus on brothers such as yourself that want to quit!
Ultimately,
"The problem isn't the problem, the problem is Jake's attitude about the problem, and Jake doesn't understand" (Captain Jack Sparrow).
Erussell, day 224 and I want to be quit as bad today as I did on my day one. Glad I promised to you today M-menace, I am quitting with you!!!
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It has been quite a while since I added anything to this thread. I just wanted to jot down a few thoughts for future reference I guess for myself or others and also to be truthfully honest with myself I have had a shit load of craves today and this is therapeutic for me.
I am on Day 84 today as I type this and I think I have entered into what I have seen referred to on KTC as the 80's funk. My craves today have been fairly frequent if not strong anyway. I have kicked the bitch in the teeth each time but she has been consistent. Damn whore........I've been waiting for her to whisper in my ear though so I have been getting ready for this funk. I think, I am good, no scratch that I am good. Sorry Nic, you will not win here today or any day so GTFO........I can smell the HOF now and will then look to hit the 2nd floor......You only quit once!
Anyway for any new quitters out there that might read this and think oh shit he is still getting craves at 80+ days, don't fret it is not as bad as the SUCK. Also, KTC just fricken works people, follow the protocol, post roll and be serious about your quit. You do that and you will be a quitter. Its not easy but has anything worthwhile in your life been easy?
Well thats all for this rant...........ODAAT QLF to everyone!
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It has been quite a while since I added anything to this thread. I just wanted to jot down a few thoughts for future reference I guess for myself or others and also to be truthfully honest with myself I have had a shit load of craves today and this is therapeutic for me.
I am on Day 84 today as I type this and I think I have entered into what I have seen referred to on KTC as the 80's funk. My craves today have been fairly frequent if not strong anyway. I have kicked the bitch in the teeth each time but she has been consistent. Damn whore........I've been waiting for her to whisper in my ear though so I have been getting ready for this funk. I think, I am good, no scratch that I am good. Sorry Nic, you will not win here today or any day so GTFO........I can smell the HOF now and will then look to hit the 2nd floor......You only quit once!
Anyway for any new quitters out there that might read this and think oh shit he is still getting craves at 80+ days, don't fret it is not as bad as the SUCK. Also, KTC just fricken works people, follow the protocol, post roll and be serious about your quit. You do that and you will be a quitter. Its not easy but has anything worthwhile in your life been easy?
Well thats all for this rant...........ODAAT QLF to everyone!
Way to fight brother!!
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It has been quite a while since I added anything to this thread. I just wanted to jot down a few thoughts for future reference I guess for myself or others and also to be truthfully honest with myself I have had a shit load of craves today and this is therapeutic for me.
I am on Day 84 today as I type this and I think I have entered into what I have seen referred to on KTC as the 80's funk. My craves today have been fairly frequent if not strong anyway. I have kicked the bitch in the teeth each time but she has been consistent. Damn whore........I've been waiting for her to whisper in my ear though so I have been getting ready for this funk. I think, I am good, no scratch that I am good. Sorry Nic, you will not win here today or any day so GTFO........I can smell the HOF now and will then look to hit the 2nd floor......You only quit once!
Anyway for any new quitters out there that might read this and think oh shit he is still getting craves at 80+ days, don't fret it is not as bad as the SUCK. Also, KTC just fricken works people, follow the protocol, post roll and be serious about your quit. You do that and you will be a quitter. Its not easy but has anything worthwhile in your life been easy?
Well thats all for this rant...........ODAAT QLF to everyone!
Way to fight brother!!
This is how you win right here.
Hey Menace--Perfect.
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It has been quite a while since I added anything to this thread. I just wanted to jot down a few thoughts for future reference I guess for myself or others and also to be truthfully honest with myself I have had a shit load of craves today and this is therapeutic for me.
I am on Day 84 today as I type this and I think I have entered into what I have seen referred to on KTC as the 80's funk. My craves today have been fairly frequent if not strong anyway. I have kicked the bitch in the teeth each time but she has been consistent. Damn whore........I've been waiting for her to whisper in my ear though so I have been getting ready for this funk. I think, I am good, no scratch that I am good. Sorry Nic, you will not win here today or any day so GTFO........I can smell the HOF now and will then look to hit the 2nd floor......You only quit once!
Anyway for any new quitters out there that might read this and think oh shit he is still getting craves at 80+ days, don't fret it is not as bad as the SUCK. Also, KTC just fricken works people, follow the protocol, post roll and be serious about your quit. You do that and you will be a quitter. Its not easy but has anything worthwhile in your life been easy?
Well thats all for this rant...........ODAAT QLF to everyone!
Way to fight brother!!
This is how you win right here.
Hey Menace--Perfect.
Nice Menace!
I am 4 days behind you and I have been having to grind hard too lately. Harder than anything since the first two weeks. We have come this far, I say we might as well keep going and see what's up ahead. We sure as hell know what is behind us. (I want no more of that life!) Quit on brother! ;Ironman:
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I was reading a couple other intro threads and it reminded me that I needed to add to mine for posterity. I had intentions on doing this at Day 110 into my quit because it was crazy day. I had a couple of the strongest craves since the suck. I actually reached for my pocket to grab my can.... 'Crazy' I thought WTF, I'm a HOF'er.... I stomped her down fairly easy but she tried again an hour later hitting me with another hard crave. I actually had to fireball it, which I have not done for a very very long time. Well that was the end of it that day and the battle was won, but it reinforced to me how important KTC is in my quit and was a inspiration for my HOF Speech of the significance insignificance of 100 days Quit. Bottom line is I am an addict and always will be an addict. Any newbie's reading this you would do well to remember that and keep KTC close even when you become a HOF'er......
QLF with you all today!
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Another entry for my personal use I guess. I was just perusing photos with my family on the computer and saw numerous pics with the tell tale fat lip. What a fuck wad I was, looking like a dumb shit with the turd in my lip. Reminded me of just one of the reasons I quit!
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Another entry for my personal use I guess. I was just perusing photos with my family on the computer and saw numerous pics with the tell tale fat lip. What a fuck wad I was, looking like a dumb shit with the turd in my lip. Reminded me of just one of the reasons I quit!
Loved hearing the story about you kicking the nic bitch at day 110 as she raised her ugly head once more. Reinforces the fact that she is never really gone, huh?
You are an inspiration!
I too saw some old photos of myself the other day and it was down right embarrassing to see my dumb ass floating around in the lake with family and friends with a big old turd in my mouth.
Proud to be quit with you. Thanks for blazing the trail!
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Another entry for my personal use I guess. I was just perusing photos with my family on the computer and saw numerous pics with the tell tale fat lip. What a fuck wad I was, looking like a dumb shit with the turd in my lip. Reminded me of just one of the reasons I quit!
Loved hearing the story about you kicking the nic bitch at day 110 as she raised her ugly head once more. Reinforces the fact that she is never really gone, huh?
You are an inspiration!
I too saw some old photos of myself the other day and it was down right embarrassing to see my dumb ass floating around in the lake with family and friends with a big old turd in my mouth.
Proud to be quit with you. Thanks for blazing the trail!
Like you I have the same problem. When I quit I had many photos with the poison in them. The poison was more important than anything to me. Why not have a photo with it and my family. 'bang head'
I was so proud of my addiction I would stop at red lights, open the door and let it fly with family in the vehicle. 'bang head'
I was so proud of my poison that it shared all my dinners, family events, boat rides, car rides, roller coaster rides. I didn't do anything without the poison. 'bang head'
A lot of quitters have problems with this trigger or that trigger. Well, my biggest trigger was my eyes being opened. If I wasn't sleeping I was chewing. 'bang head'
For 395 I haven't been doing any of the above and it feels so good. We are free my friend. Taking new pictures and enjoying family events more than ever. Actually listening to the family talk without wondering when i'm going to be able to sneak a chew. Now I look back and i'm disgusted also. There is not enough time left in our lives to make up for the dumb sh@@ we've done. Lets make the best of the rest! Quit with you today.
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I wanted to add to this yesterday but stuff just got in the way and the day was over. Anyway just a quick journal entry for myself and anyone else who might be interested. I guess this entry is an acknowledgement as to the power of the Nic Whore. I was at work on Thursday 5/1 and at around 9pm I stepped out of my car and began to reach for "my can" in the cargo packet that I carried it in for 14 years at work. As I was just about to slip my hand into my pocket with the full intention of grabbing the can, my brain snapped to attention and I thought WTF dude, there is no can in there. I thought about it for a little while afterward and couldn't hardly wrap my mind around the addictiveness of nicotine. Here I am 163 days free of the slave driver and she still has the ability to completely fool my brain into thinking I want her yet. It was one of the stronger craves I have had in the past month or two for sure. I popped a fireball and all was right with the world and I have not given the girl a second thought until writing this today. So does she ever completely disappear from your life? No! Does the war truly end? Nope! The goal is to win each little battle everyday and enjoy the days that the dogs of war take a break. The days you don't have to fight much to stay free of the whore. Those are the days we battle for. Stay vigilant!!!!!!
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I wanted to add to this yesterday but stuff just got in the way and the day was over. Anyway just a quick journal entry for myself and anyone else who might be interested. I guess this entry is an acknowledgement as to the power of the Nic Whore. I was at work on Thursday 5/1 and at around 9pm I stepped out of my car and began to reach for "my can" in the cargo packet that I carried it in for 14 years at work. As I was just about to slip my hand into my pocket with the full intention of grabbing the can, my brain snapped to attention and I thought WTF dude, there is no can in there. I thought about it for a little while afterward and couldn't hardly wrap my mind around the addictiveness of nicotine. Here I am 163 days free of the slave driver and she still has the ability to completely fool my brain into thinking I want her yet. It was one of the stronger craves I have had in the past month or two for sure. I popped a fireball and all was right with the world and I have not given the girl a second thought until writing this today. So does she ever completely disappear from your life? No! Does the war truly end? Nope! The goal is to win each little battle everyday and enjoy the days that the dogs of war take a break. The days you don't have to fight much to stay free of the whore. Those are the days we battle for. Stay vigilant!!!!!!
Way to hang Menace. I know exactly what you're talking about. The nic bitch whispers and you have to smack her away. Proud to quit with you brother.
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Rolling Log entry here on day 245. I have been a bit more active on the site lately and this is likely due to a couple things. One paying it forward is an excellent reward in itself and second the act of helping others in their quit is helping me even more I think. I am not sure what it is, but the last couple weeks have been a bitch. My craves have been really strong and take some work to kick the shit out of. Reading my last post, I went through a small stretch back almost 100 days ago but these past couple weeks the craves have been maybe the strongest I have had since the first 100 days. You would think that at day 245 it would be much easier, but it has not been. Have no fear, my quit is solid but it is not without work. We have been dealing with a lot of caver's and some turmoil around here lately but for any newbies reading this, KTC works. Follow the rules, listen to the solid quitters on the board and POST ROLL. Realize that this is a life long battle you fight anew every day!
I am an addict, I am an addict, I am an addict, I am an addict, I am an addict of the Nicotine Whore...........To stay free I will fight the war one battle at a time, one day at a time. Thanks to KTC and all my fellow quitters!
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Been craving pretty hard the past couple days so I wanted to log it in here on my intro thread. Can't even believe I am at 280 days and the past 2 days have felt like the first damn week again. I have been sucking on Jolly Ranchers, chewing Juicy Fruit and spitting Pickle Seeds like a mad man the last 2 days at work. Had a hellacious dream last night that I caved and was rolling with a big old cat turd in and smoking cigarettes of all things. Then I had all kinds of feelings of regret and sadness at my weakness. The I was trying to figure out how to crawl back here to KTC and admit the cave but I didn't feel like I was strong enough to do that. It was a crazy dream, vivid! Woke up in a cold sweat, thinking what the hell had I done, throwing away 280 days. Then I realized it was just a damn dream. Anyway I wanted to log this for reference in the future and for all those out there that might be battling the wicked Nicotine Whore. Bottom line is I am still Quit and even though its been a bear lately I have the tools to keep beating her down thanks to KTC.
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Been craving pretty hard the past couple days so I wanted to log it in here on my intro thread. Can't even believe I am at 280 days and the past 2 days have felt like the first damn week again. I have been sucking on Jolly Ranchers, chewing Juicy Fruit and spitting Pickle Seeds like a mad man the last 2 days at work. Had a hellacious dream last night that I caved and was rolling with a big old cat turd in and smoking cigarettes of all things. Then I had all kinds of feelings of regret and sadness at my weakness. The I was trying to figure out how to crawl back here to KTC and admit the cave but I didn't feel like I was strong enough to do that. It was a crazy dream, vivid! Woke up in a cold sweat, thinking what the hell had I done, throwing away 280 days. Then I realized it was just a damn dream. Anyway I wanted to log this for reference in the future and for all those out there that might be battling the wicked Nicotine Whore. Bottom line is I am still Quit and even though its been a bear lately I have the tools to keep beating her down thanks to KTC.
Hey Menace I'm just a bit ahead of you at 300 and change and I had a really rough patch around 250 to 275 or so. You have the right approach- we have the tools and can slap the bitch back when she shows back up. I thin it's sort of good to get tested now and then - keeps you a little less complacent at least. I don't want to be that guy caving at 800+, and I know you dont either. Let's just keep kicking this thing daily! Sugar free cinnamon candies get me through the tough spots.
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Been craving pretty hard the past couple days so I wanted to log it in here on my intro thread. Can't even believe I am at 280 days and the past 2 days have felt like the first damn week again. I have been sucking on Jolly Ranchers, chewing Juicy Fruit and spitting Pickle Seeds like a mad man the last 2 days at work. Had a hellacious dream last night that I caved and was rolling with a big old cat turd in and smoking cigarettes of all things. Then I had all kinds of feelings of regret and sadness at my weakness. The I was trying to figure out how to crawl back here to KTC and admit the cave but I didn't feel like I was strong enough to do that. It was a crazy dream, vivid! Woke up in a cold sweat, thinking what the hell had I done, throwing away 280 days. Then I realized it was just a damn dream. Anyway I wanted to log this for reference in the future and for all those out there that might be battling the wicked Nicotine Whore. Bottom line is I am still Quit and even though its been a bear lately I have the tools to keep beating her down thanks to KTC.
Hey Menace I'm just a bit ahead of you at 300 and change and I had a really rough patch around 250 to 275 or so. You have the right approach- we have the tools and can slap the bitch back when she shows back up. I thin it's sort of good to get tested now and then - keeps you a little less complacent at least. I don't want to be that guy caving at 800+, and I know you dont either. Let's just keep kicking this thing daily! Sugar free cinnamon candies get me through the tough spots.
Sugar free cinnamon Candies got him thru it...Sugar free cinnamon candies and a lot of cawk
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Been craving pretty hard the past couple days so I wanted to log it in here on my intro thread. Can't even believe I am at 280 days and the past 2 days have felt like the first damn week again. I have been sucking on Jolly Ranchers, chewing Juicy Fruit and spitting Pickle Seeds like a mad man the last 2 days at work. Had a hellacious dream last night that I caved and was rolling with a big old cat turd in and smoking cigarettes of all things. Then I had all kinds of feelings of regret and sadness at my weakness. The I was trying to figure out how to crawl back here to KTC and admit the cave but I didn't feel like I was strong enough to do that. It was a crazy dream, vivid! Woke up in a cold sweat, thinking what the hell had I done, throwing away 280 days. Then I realized it was just a damn dream. Anyway I wanted to log this for reference in the future and for all those out there that might be battling the wicked Nicotine Whore. Bottom line is I am still Quit and even though its been a bear lately I have the tools to keep beating her down thanks to KTC.
Hey Menace I'm just a bit ahead of you at 300 and change and I had a really rough patch around 250 to 275 or so. You have the right approach- we have the tools and can slap the bitch back when she shows back up. I thin it's sort of good to get tested now and then - keeps you a little less complacent at least. I don't want to be that guy caving at 800+, and I know you dont either. Let's just keep kicking this thing daily! Sugar free cinnamon candies get me through the tough spots.
Sugar free cinnamon Candies got him thru it...Sugar free cinnamon candies and a lot of cawk
Word is Bruce knows first hand 'winker'
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Been craving pretty hard the past couple days so I wanted to log it in here on my intro thread. Can't even believe I am at 280 days and the past 2 days have felt like the first damn week again. I have been sucking on Jolly Ranchers, chewing Juicy Fruit and spitting Pickle Seeds like a mad man the last 2 days at work. Had a hellacious dream last night that I caved and was rolling with a big old cat turd in and smoking cigarettes of all things. Then I had all kinds of feelings of regret and sadness at my weakness. The I was trying to figure out how to crawl back here to KTC and admit the cave but I didn't feel like I was strong enough to do that. It was a crazy dream, vivid! Woke up in a cold sweat, thinking what the hell had I done, throwing away 280 days. Then I realized it was just a damn dream. Anyway I wanted to log this for reference in the future and for all those out there that might be battling the wicked Nicotine Whore. Bottom line is I am still Quit and even though its been a bear lately I have the tools to keep beating her down thanks to KTC.
Hey Menace I'm just a bit ahead of you at 300 and change and I had a really rough patch around 250 to 275 or so. You have the right approach- we have the tools and can slap the bitch back when she shows back up. I thin it's sort of good to get tested now and then - keeps you a little less complacent at least. I don't want to be that guy caving at 800+, and I know you dont either. Let's just keep kicking this thing daily! Sugar free cinnamon candies get me through the tough spots.
Sugar free cinnamon Candies got him thru it...Sugar free cinnamon candies and a lot of cawk
Word is Bruce knows first hand 'winker'
Hang tough Menace. We need ya brother. Shout if you need help.
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Been craving pretty hard the past couple days so I wanted to log it in here on my intro thread. Can't even believe I am at 280 days and the past 2 days have felt like the first damn week again. I have been sucking on Jolly Ranchers, chewing Juicy Fruit and spitting Pickle Seeds like a mad man the last 2 days at work. Had a hellacious dream last night that I caved and was rolling with a big old cat turd in and smoking cigarettes of all things. Then I had all kinds of feelings of regret and sadness at my weakness. The I was trying to figure out how to crawl back here to KTC and admit the cave but I didn't feel like I was strong enough to do that. It was a crazy dream, vivid! Woke up in a cold sweat, thinking what the hell had I done, throwing away 280 days. Then I realized it was just a damn dream. Anyway I wanted to log this for reference in the future and for all those out there that might be battling the wicked Nicotine Whore. Bottom line is I am still Quit and even though its been a bear lately I have the tools to keep beating her down thanks to KTC.
Hey Menace I'm just a bit ahead of you at 300 and change and I had a really rough patch around 250 to 275 or so. You have the right approach- we have the tools and can slap the bitch back when she shows back up. I thin it's sort of good to get tested now and then - keeps you a little less complacent at least. I don't want to be that guy caving at 800+, and I know you dont either. Let's just keep kicking this thing daily! Sugar free cinnamon candies get me through the tough spots.
Sugar free cinnamon Candies got him thru it...Sugar free cinnamon candies and a lot of cawk
Word is Bruce knows first hand 'winker'
Hang tough Menace. We need ya brother. Shout if you need help.
Thanks Fellas, today was a good day in comparison to the past few so hoping I got past this little funk.
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Been craving pretty hard the past couple days so I wanted to log it in here on my intro thread. Can't even believe I am at 280 days and the past 2 days have felt like the first damn week again. I have been sucking on Jolly Ranchers, chewing Juicy Fruit and spitting Pickle Seeds like a mad man the last 2 days at work. Had a hellacious dream last night that I caved and was rolling with a big old cat turd in and smoking cigarettes of all things. Then I had all kinds of feelings of regret and sadness at my weakness. The I was trying to figure out how to crawl back here to KTC and admit the cave but I didn't feel like I was strong enough to do that. It was a crazy dream, vivid! Woke up in a cold sweat, thinking what the hell had I done, throwing away 280 days. Then I realized it was just a damn dream. Anyway I wanted to log this for reference in the future and for all those out there that might be battling the wicked Nicotine Whore. Bottom line is I am still Quit and even though its been a bear lately I have the tools to keep beating her down thanks to KTC.
Hey Menace I'm just a bit ahead of you at 300 and change and I had a really rough patch around 250 to 275 or so. You have the right approach- we have the tools and can slap the bitch back when she shows back up. I thin it's sort of good to get tested now and then - keeps you a little less complacent at least. I don't want to be that guy caving at 800+, and I know you dont either. Let's just keep kicking this thing daily! Sugar free cinnamon candies get me through the tough spots.
Sugar free cinnamon Candies got him thru it...Sugar free cinnamon candies and a lot of cawk
Word is Bruce knows first hand 'winker'
Hang tough Menace. We need ya brother. Shout if you need help.
Thanks Fellas, today was a good day in comparison to the past few so hoping I got past this little funk.
You also came here for help......that is quitting and winning. Tons of hands out there ready to help....grab one....just one....and you be fine man! Fuck you funk. Quit on.
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Been craving pretty hard the past couple days so I wanted to log it in here on my intro thread. Can't even believe I am at 280 days and the past 2 days have felt like the first damn week again. I have been sucking on Jolly Ranchers, chewing Juicy Fruit and spitting Pickle Seeds like a mad man the last 2 days at work. Had a hellacious dream last night that I caved and was rolling with a big old cat turd in and smoking cigarettes of all things. Then I had all kinds of feelings of regret and sadness at my weakness. The I was trying to figure out how to crawl back here to KTC and admit the cave but I didn't feel like I was strong enough to do that. It was a crazy dream, vivid! Woke up in a cold sweat, thinking what the hell had I done, throwing away 280 days. Then I realized it was just a damn dream. Anyway I wanted to log this for reference in the future and for all those out there that might be battling the wicked Nicotine Whore. Bottom line is I am still Quit and even though its been a bear lately I have the tools to keep beating her down thanks to KTC.
Hey Menace I'm just a bit ahead of you at 300 and change and I had a really rough patch around 250 to 275 or so. You have the right approach- we have the tools and can slap the bitch back when she shows back up. I thin it's sort of good to get tested now and then - keeps you a little less complacent at least. I don't want to be that guy caving at 800+, and I know you dont either. Let's just keep kicking this thing daily! Sugar free cinnamon candies get me through the tough spots.
Sugar free cinnamon Candies got him thru it...Sugar free cinnamon candies and a lot of cawk
Word is Bruce knows first hand 'winker'
Hang tough Menace. We need ya brother. Shout if you need help.
Thanks Fellas, today was a good day in comparison to the past few so hoping I got past this little funk.
You also came here for help......that is quitting and winning. Tons of hands out there ready to help....grab one....just one....and you be fine man! Fuck you funk. Quit on.
Ginet, I think all I needed was to come on here and write the post to chronicle the event and of course it always helps that a few folks chime in, to give you a little kick in the pants and slap on the back. I just know that this was the worst crave period since the first couple weeks and the slight funk just before the HOF. My resolve was strong yet though and although the couple days seemed to kind of be one continuous crave with much gum, seed eating and jolly ranchers I don't feel I was to the point of having to make phone calls to protect my quit. That said, it sure is nice to know that it is an option if needed. Bottom line still quit today and learned something in the process. 3rd Floor here I come......one step at a time!
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Minute Entry 10/06/14:
Just wanted to write this down for future reference. 320 days in yesterday and last night I had my 5th "dip dream." Entered into that netherworld between sleep and wakefulness and felt like crap for caving. Was trying to figure out how to break the news to KTC land when I fully woke up and realized it was a dream. Relief washed over me and I was thankful for my quit. Crazy thing about the dip dreams for me, is that I didn't even get any during my first 100 days but now I have gotten a few over the last month. I think the nic bitch is starting to panic realizing that this dude is really serious this time around about quitting.....Well she can take a flying f$@k because I am serious and even your dreams will not work...... 'Finger' thats for you US Tobacco! Proud to Quit with my KTC Family Today!
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Figured since I hit the one year mark today and have not written anything in this intro for a little while I would note the day. Unfortunately my 1 year anniversary is also marked with being home sick so the celebration beer will have to wait till I feel a bit better. For any newbies reading this, it may sound redundant but this place, this system it flat out works if you allow it to. You obviously need the fortitude to start and the mentality to stay the course but the KTC system will show you the way. Just grind out each day, each hour or each minute and it gets easier. I know those first few days, even months seem almost impossible at times and I won't lie the nicotine witch still whispers every once in a while even at a year but KTC will give you the tools to stomp her guts out. Thats all for now and lets quit for another 24 hours!
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Figured since I hit the one year mark today and have not written anything in this intro for a little while I would note the day. Unfortunately my 1 year anniversary is also marked with being home sick so the celebration beer will have to wait till I feel a bit better. For any newbies reading this, it may sound redundant but this place, this system it flat out works if you allow it to. You obviously need the fortitude to start and the mentality to stay the course but the KTC system will show you the way. Just grind out each day, each hour or each minute and it gets easier. I know those first few days, even months seem almost impossible at times and I won't lie the nicotine witch still whispers every once in a while even at a year but KTC will give you the tools to stomp her guts out. Thats all for now and lets quit for another 24 hours!
Congrats on the trip around the Sun!
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Figured since I hit the one year mark today and have not written anything in this intro for a little while I would note the day. Unfortunately my 1 year anniversary is also marked with being home sick so the celebration beer will have to wait till I feel a bit better. For any newbies reading this, it may sound redundant but this place, this system it flat out works if you allow it to. You obviously need the fortitude to start and the mentality to stay the course but the KTC system will show you the way. Just grind out each day, each hour or each minute and it gets easier. I know those first few days, even months seem almost impossible at times and I won't lie the nicotine witch still whispers every once in a while even at a year but KTC will give you the tools to stomp her guts out. Thats all for now and lets quit for another 24 hours!
Congrats on the trip around the Sun!
Congrats Menace. Thanks for being a solid quitter. See you tomorrow for 366.
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Figured since I hit the one year mark today and have not written anything in this intro for a little while I would note the day. Unfortunately my 1 year anniversary is also marked with being home sick so the celebration beer will have to wait till I feel a bit better. For any newbies reading this, it may sound redundant but this place, this system it flat out works if you allow it to. You obviously need the fortitude to start and the mentality to stay the course but the KTC system will show you the way. Just grind out each day, each hour or each minute and it gets easier. I know those first few days, even months seem almost impossible at times and I won't lie the nicotine witch still whispers every once in a while even at a year but KTC will give you the tools to stomp her guts out. Thats all for now and lets quit for another 24 hours!
Congrats on the trip around the Sun!
Congrats Menace. Thanks for being a solid quitter. See you tomorrow for 366.
Nice job, menace. One full lap! That deserves some boobies 'boob'
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Figured since I hit the one year mark today and have not written anything in this intro for a little while I would note the day. Unfortunately my 1 year anniversary is also marked with being home sick so the celebration beer will have to wait till I feel a bit better. For any newbies reading this, it may sound redundant but this place, this system it flat out works if you allow it to. You obviously need the fortitude to start and the mentality to stay the course but the KTC system will show you the way. Just grind out each day, each hour or each minute and it gets easier. I know those first few days, even months seem almost impossible at times and I won't lie the nicotine witch still whispers every once in a while even at a year but KTC will give you the tools to stomp her guts out. Thats all for now and lets quit for another 24 hours!
Congrats on the trip around the Sun!
Congrats Menace. Thanks for being a solid quitter. See you tomorrow for 366.
Nice job, menace. One full lap! That deserves some boobies 'boob'
Thanks all, I felt better today and had a celebration Guinness...... 'no'
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Figured since I hit the one year mark today and have not written anything in this intro for a little while I would note the day. Unfortunately my 1 year anniversary is also marked with being home sick so the celebration beer will have to wait till I feel a bit better. For any newbies reading this, it may sound redundant but this place, this system it flat out works if you allow it to. You obviously need the fortitude to start and the mentality to stay the course but the KTC system will show you the way. Just grind out each day, each hour or each minute and it gets easier. I know those first few days, even months seem almost impossible at times and I won't lie the nicotine witch still whispers every once in a while even at a year but KTC will give you the tools to stomp her guts out. Thats all for now and lets quit for another 24 hours!
Congrats on the trip around the Sun!
Congrats Menace. Thanks for being a solid quitter. See you tomorrow for 366.
Nice job, menace. One full lap! That deserves some boobies 'boob'
Thanks all, I felt better today and had a celebration Guinness...... 'no'
Congrats bro. nicely done
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Figured since I hit the one year mark today and have not written anything in this intro for a little while I would note the day. Unfortunately my 1 year anniversary is also marked with being home sick so the celebration beer will have to wait till I feel a bit better. For any newbies reading this, it may sound redundant but this place, this system it flat out works if you allow it to. You obviously need the fortitude to start and the mentality to stay the course but the KTC system will show you the way. Just grind out each day, each hour or each minute and it gets easier. I know those first few days, even months seem almost impossible at times and I won't lie the nicotine witch still whispers every once in a while even at a year but KTC will give you the tools to stomp her guts out. Thats all for now and lets quit for another 24 hours!
Congrats on the trip around the Sun!
Congrats Menace. Thanks for being a solid quitter. See you tomorrow for 366.
Nice job, menace. One full lap! That deserves some boobies 'boob'
Thanks all, I felt better today and had a celebration Guinness...... 'no'
Congrats bro. nicely done
Well done Menace!
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Nice work gaining the 4th floor today Menace! Merry Christmas! 'oh yeah'
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Nice work gaining the 4th floor today Menace! Merry Christmas! 'oh yeah'
Another stellar quitter here folks! Congrats buddy on 400!
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Nice work gaining the 4th floor today Menace! Merry Christmas! 'oh yeah'
Another stellar quitter here folks! Congrats buddy on 400!
Congrats Menace. Merry Christmas!
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Thanks everyone for the congrats on the 4th floor. It's been a crazy couple weeks for my family. Felt like this would be good to put here on my intro for future reading and inspiration to stay quit I guess and maybe someone can take something away from it as well. My stepfather of 23 years passed away on December 5th somewhat suddenly at 61 years of age. We had to move him back to Minnesota from Arizona and just buried him the weekend before Christmas. Anyway I say somewhat suddenly because he was having some health issues related to his lungs. He was a life long smoker who about 3 years ago contracted "Valley Fever" (I won't get into what that is, you can google it but it essentially scars your lungs) He also had COPD already as well. He battled Pneumonia continuously the past couple years have its 2,3,4 times a year. He was in the midst of a 2 month long bout when he had a breathing attack and died suddenly. My mother was there and immediately started CPR and called 911 on her cell phone, talking to them on speaker while doing CPR. He never revived.....Anyway the point to this story I guess is that the one thing which seemed to be constant in all this was smoking. He attempted to quit (stopping) several times over the past few years making it maybe 2 months clean but as soon as the Pneumonia subsided and he started to feel a bit better, he started sucking on the cancer stick again and then a short time later he was sick again. I voiced my opinion to him and my mother about this and ultimately he knew there was a correlation, however he was a full blown addict who could not shake the bitch for whatever reason. Cancer was not his official cause of death however you will never convince me otherwise that smoking was not the ultimate cause of his death. So remember the Nic Bitch is a powerful enemy folks who can take your life from you in more ways then one.
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Two years into this little adventure so I wanted to post up since its been quite some time since I last wrote in this thread. Any NFG's reading this, I have a piece of advice for you. If you let it, KTC will save your ass! Myself and all of my other brothers and sisters here on KTC are a testament to that. If you think that you have your addiction whipped at any time during in your life once you quit, and I mean anytime in your life, it will come back and bite you in the ass. Two years in and I still have craves, crazy right! It is crazy for sure but you know what. If you are here, participating in KTC, it will keep you quit! This place, posting roll is what keeps it rolling. I don't have any magic suggestions or great wisdom to pass along to anyone except that this damn site works if you follow the plan. Thanks to all of KTC and to my brothers in Feb. Freedom Fighters of Quit!
QLF...................
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I have not posted in this thread for a long time but felt it was appropriate on this 1,000 day of quit to revive it for those who may be searching and fighting to quit. This 1,000 days of quit would not be possible without this place called KTC, at least for this schmuck. So really this mark of 1,000 is a testament to the KTC brotherhood/sisterhood that exists here. It is a tough love place for sure and if your feelings get hurt easily it might not be the place for you. But if you want to quit and stay quit the trail has been blazed already, just get on the train.
QLF