KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: superoblivionbread on November 10, 2014, 01:06:00 PM
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Hello all,
My first encounter with nicotine was 13 days before my 18th birthday--my girlfriend gave me a cigarette, and I foolishly accepted. Since then, I've heavily used whatever tobacco I could get my hands on, but eventually settled on smokeless tobacco. I remember so many instances where I'd sneak away to have a cigarette or dip while visiting my family, or hiding this addiction from girlfriends. This eventually evolved into dodging my daughter's questions when she asked "daddy what are you eating/drinking" or trying to buy a can without her noticing. I was always pretty ashamed by my addiction I guess, but never ashamed enough to really try to quit.
A few things occurred to me this year, though:
I always remembered thinking "It's only been X years since I started. I'll quit soon" every year around my birthday. My birthday isn't here yet, but I got to thinking a couple months ago that this would mark my ten year anniversary. That was my first shock--I've been addicted to nicotine for a decade.
Second, I just got a job a public health nurse. I sit, in my office or at a health fair or whatever, and I tell people what all of the benefits to tobacco cessation are, and I give them all of the resources they can use, and how they can do it, and blah blah blah. That's not my entire job description, but it's part of it, and I realized what an ass I am, trying to help people do something I am unwilling to do.
I took a good look at myself, and realized that continuing to dip is pretty ridiculous. That and I was tired of bottles of spit and empty cans accumulating in my car or on my desk, tired of having ass breath all the time, tired of that accidental-nap brown ring on the pillow, and so on. So at midnight on September 22, I threw my stash in the trash.
Humorously (or disgustingly) enough, I dug a can out of trash on the 23rd and seriously contemplated having a chew; thankfully I ended-up flushing it instead. No nicotine or tobacco since.
Historically, I've been successful at quitting a number of times until I get to around day 45-50, and then I succumb to this horrid feeling that I have right now, a sort of combination of depression, boredom, and anxiety. I start to feel like I flushed my best friend down the toilet.
I know that's bullshit. I am ready to do it right this time. I know that I am not tough enough or smart enough to just get through it--I've learned that much through experience. So I signed up in my weakest moment, instead of the alternative.
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Hello all,
My first encounter with nicotine was 13 days before my 18th birthday--my girlfriend gave me a cigarette, and I foolishly accepted. Since then, I've heavily used whatever tobacco I could get my hands on, but eventually settled on smokeless tobacco. I remember so many instances where I'd sneak away to have a cigarette or dip while visiting my family, or hiding this addiction from girlfriends. This eventually evolved into dodging my daughter's questions when she asked "daddy what are you eating/drinking" or trying to buy a can without her noticing. I was always pretty ashamed by my addiction I guess, but never ashamed enough to really try to quit.
A few things occurred to me this year, though:
I always remembered thinking "It's only been X years since I started. I'll quit soon" every year around my birthday. My birthday isn't here yet, but I got to thinking a couple months ago that this would mark my ten year anniversary. That was my first shock--I've been addicted to nicotine for a decade.
Second, I just got a job a public health nurse. I sit, in my office or at a health fair or whatever, and I tell people what all of the benefits to tobacco cessation are, and I give them all of the resources they can use, and how they can do it, and blah blah blah. That's not my entire job description, but it's part of it, and I realized what an ass I am, trying to help people do something I am unwilling to do.
I took a good look at myself, and realized that continuing to dip is pretty ridiculous. That and I was tired of bottles of spit and empty cans accumulating in my car or on my desk, tired of having ass breath all the time, tired of that accidental-nap brown ring on the pillow, and so on. So at midnight on September 22, I threw my stash in the trash.
Humorously (or disgustingly) enough, I dug a can out of trash on the 23rd and seriously contemplated having a chew; thankfully I ended-up flushing it instead. No nicotine or tobacco since.
Historically, I've been successful at quitting a number of times until I get to around day 45-50, and then I succumb to this horrid feeling that I have right now, a sort of combination of depression, boredom, and anxiety. I start to feel like I flushed my best friend down the toilet.
I know that's bullshit. I am ready to do it right this time. I know that I am not tough enough or smart enough to just get through it--I've learned that much through experience. So I signed up in my weakest moment, instead of the alternative.
Hi superoblivionbread.
Our quit dates are the same. We are on day 50 and we rock!
Come to December and post up with me and the team. Ask for quit buddies to help keep you accountable.
Proud to be quit with you!
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Hello all,
My first encounter with nicotine was 13 days before my 18th birthday--my girlfriend gave me a cigarette, and I foolishly accepted. Since then, I've heavily used whatever tobacco I could get my hands on, but eventually settled on smokeless tobacco. I remember so many instances where I'd sneak away to have a cigarette or dip while visiting my family, or hiding this addiction from girlfriends. This eventually evolved into dodging my daughter's questions when she asked "daddy what are you eating/drinking" or trying to buy a can without her noticing. I was always pretty ashamed by my addiction I guess, but never ashamed enough to really try to quit.
A few things occurred to me this year, though:
I always remembered thinking "It's only been X years since I started. I'll quit soon" every year around my birthday. My birthday isn't here yet, but I got to thinking a couple months ago that this would mark my ten year anniversary. That was my first shock--I've been addicted to nicotine for a decade.
Second, I just got a job a public health nurse. I sit, in my office or at a health fair or whatever, and I tell people what all of the benefits to tobacco cessation are, and I give them all of the resources they can use, and how they can do it, and blah blah blah. That's not my entire job description, but it's part of it, and I realized what an ass I am, trying to help people do something I am unwilling to do.
I took a good look at myself, and realized that continuing to dip is pretty ridiculous. That and I was tired of bottles of spit and empty cans accumulating in my car or on my desk, tired of having ass breath all the time, tired of that accidental-nap brown ring on the pillow, and so on. So at midnight on September 22, I threw my stash in the trash.
Humorously (or disgustingly) enough, I dug a can out of trash on the 23rd and seriously contemplated having a chew; thankfully I ended-up flushing it instead. No nicotine or tobacco since.
Historically, I've been successful at quitting a number of times until I get to around day 45-50, and then I succumb to this horrid feeling that I have right now, a sort of combination of depression, boredom, and anxiety. I start to feel like I flushed my best friend down the toilet.
I know that's bullshit. I am ready to do it right this time. I know that I am not tough enough or smart enough to just get through it--I've learned that much through experience. So I signed up in my weakest moment, instead of the alternative.
Hi superoblivionbread.
Our quit dates are the same. We are on day 50 and we rock!
Come to December and post up with me and the team. Ask for quit buddies to help keep you accountable.
Proud to be quit with you!
Welcome! I am also in the December quit group with Amy. I will be right there with you everyday. I am glad that you joined, I am glad that you quit for you. This site works if you just give it chance.
Join our quit group by posting roll today. Once you do, I will PM you with my number so you can call or text if you ever need to talk. If you need help with anything, please let either of us know and we will come running.
Congrats on day 50!!!
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WELCOME brother!!! My quit was on 9/23 and I too belong to the December brother/sisterhood! Start roll calling with us and stay quit!!!
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Hello all,
My first encounter with nicotine was 13 days before my 18th birthday--my girlfriend gave me a cigarette, and I foolishly accepted. Since then, I've heavily used whatever tobacco I could get my hands on, but eventually settled on smokeless tobacco. I remember so many instances where I'd sneak away to have a cigarette or dip while visiting my family, or hiding this addiction from girlfriends. This eventually evolved into dodging my daughter's questions when she asked "daddy what are you eating/drinking" or trying to buy a can without her noticing. I was always pretty ashamed by my addiction I guess, but never ashamed enough to really try to quit.
A few things occurred to me this year, though:
I always remembered thinking "It's only been X years since I started. I'll quit soon" every year around my birthday. My birthday isn't here yet, but I got to thinking a couple months ago that this would mark my ten year anniversary. That was my first shock--I've been addicted to nicotine for a decade.
Second, I just got a job a public health nurse. I sit, in my office or at a health fair or whatever, and I tell people what all of the benefits to tobacco cessation are, and I give them all of the resources they can use, and how they can do it, and blah blah blah. That's not my entire job description, but it's part of it, and I realized what an ass I am, trying to help people do something I am unwilling to do.
I took a good look at myself, and realized that continuing to dip is pretty ridiculous. That and I was tired of bottles of spit and empty cans accumulating in my car or on my desk, tired of having ass breath all the time, tired of that accidental-nap brown ring on the pillow, and so on. So at midnight on September 22, I threw my stash in the trash.
Humorously (or disgustingly) enough, I dug a can out of trash on the 23rd and seriously contemplated having a chew; thankfully I ended-up flushing it instead. No nicotine or tobacco since.
Historically, I've been successful at quitting a number of times until I get to around day 45-50, and then I succumb to this horrid feeling that I have right now, a sort of combination of depression, boredom, and anxiety. I start to feel like I flushed my best friend down the toilet.
I know that's bullshit. I am ready to do it right this time. I know that I am not tough enough or smart enough to just get through it--I've learned that much through experience. So I signed up in my weakest moment, instead of the alternative.
Hi superoblivionbread.
Our quit dates are the same. We are on day 50 and we rock!
Come to December and post up with me and the team. Ask for quit buddies to help keep you accountable.
Proud to be quit with you!
Welcome! I am also in the December quit group with Amy. I will be right there with you everyday. I am glad that you joined, I am glad that you quit for you. This site works if you just give it chance.
Join our quit group by posting roll today. Once you do, I will PM you with my number so you can call or text if you ever need to talk. If you need help with anything, please let either of us know and we will come running.
Congrats on day 50!!!
Hey you quittin' S.O.B. (see what I did there; SuperOblivionBread) Keep reading and come on by December and post a +1 with us. We'd love to have some new blood in there. Amy and I both quit with you on 9/22 and will continue to quit with you ODAAT, EDD!
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Hi SuperBread, we have such a good time quitting in December group. Hope you consider posting roll with us and help us keep ourselves accountable. A benefit of that will help you add accountability to your quit too. Quit on brother
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Super,
Smart decision in coming here. But you should face one thing first - you have never quit before -you have just temporarliy stopped. Many of us here had stopped using nicotine countless times before, but never stood up and honestly faced our addiction until coming to KTC.
If you are serious about quitting, and from your intro, it really does seem like you are, then take the time to read some of the intros on this site, read about addiction, read HOF speeches about how they succeeded, read about people who caved and why, and finally read the story of Tom and Jenny Kern under the Words of Wisdom section.
Other badass quitters from December are welcoming you with open arms. Believe it or not, they care about you and care that you stay quit.
So if you are ready to make the committment, and to make a promise one day at a time to not use nictoine in any form, then come on over to December and start posting with us.
Quit with you today.
CJ
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Thank you everyone for the support and kind words! I'll be hanging around KTC for awhile I suspect! Nice to know I'm not alone . . .
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exactly. you are not alone. you'll find it quite refreshing to know that this bunch of internet strangers know exactly what the hell you're talking about and are going through.
welcome to december quit group. I quit with you today.
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Congrats on 500 SOB! I still remember your day one in december waltzing in with your demented looking avatar and crazy name! But you have been a steadfast badass quitter ever since! Proud to quit with you SOB! CJ
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Congrats on 500 SOB! I still remember your day one in december waltzing in with your demented looking avatar and crazy name! But you have been a steadfast badass quitter ever since! Proud to quit with you SOB! CJ
Congrats on the 5th floor brother!
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Congrats Super! I just read your first post again and it is amazing how far we have come!! Proud to RANT and quit with you brother!