KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Antisaint on June 02, 2014, 01:38:00 AM
-
Hey there. Introductions are great in a way of showing people exactly what you want them to know about you. Internet ones are even easier since its just the words your typing and people cannot determine tone or other verbal cues. I could sit here and type the least amount of information possible to gain your initial trust and gain the motivation from you guys to stay quit. But... I'm an asshole and a liar.
I am currently in the Air Force serving as a Staff Sergeant at Beale AFB, CA. I have been dipping for 14 years. 12 of said years, I constantly lied to my wife, my family, and myself about being quit over and over. I was not held accountable at any other moment than to hide more cans, or explain how a can just showed up somewhere in my house or my car.
I don't know about you guys but I have made promise after fucking promise to those who love me to stay quit, or to quit in general. I never have been able to uphold that promise to them. I never have internalized why I should quit in the first place. I have been just trying to satisfy their requests and it has never worked.
So recently my wife found out that I had been dipping again. The poor woman has put up with 12 years in this relationship of empty promises and has finally had it. We have a beautiful 2 year old daughter (and were planning on having more) and she is no longer willing to force her to grow up with a Dad who is going to kill himself and loves a fucking leaf more than his family. I understand. I made one final promise. I am done with fucking tobacco.
That said, I hovered about this website for about a week deciding if I could live up to the cold turkey no bullshit attitude you all bring to your members. I decided last night was the last piece of poison I would ever put in my lip again. All day clean with no nicotine, I log in to post this Intoduction, wondering after I write all this shit if trust and accountability can be EARNED instead of given. I almost caved before I got to the intro page. I going the Live Chat, talked to Lady G, MCO, and Knockout, flushed the hidden stash, and got in here to pour this intro out.
Day one is gone. Day two has begun. Fuck the Nicotine bitch. Roll has been posted. I quit with all of you today.
-
Welcome Antisaint... If you're ready to quit you've definitely come to the right place.
One thing I would like to point out... You need to be sure you're quitting for YOU. It kind of sounds like you're quitting for the wife and to keep the marriage together. What happens after you've been quit, say... 90 days and the marriage is all peachy again. She thinks, "YOU'VE DONE IT!! YOU'VE BEEN HEALED!!". Now she's off your ass about it. Things are great. What are you going to do then? This isn't going to last if you're doing it for her... This absolutely has to be 100% about and for YOU!!
Read over the welcome center:
forum/55560/ (http://forum.killthecan.org/forum/55560/)
Post roll everyday, early in the morning. Your quit group will be September. That's your promise to us and to yourself that you're not going to use nic of any kind (gum, patches, lozenges, chew, etc..) for the day (24 hours). Honesty is everything, to us and honesty to yourself.
Start gathering phone numbers and build your web of accountability. We will hold you accountable for your quit, and we expect you to hold us accountable as well. Actually text and/or call those numbers you get in good and bad times. Build your brotherhood.
As you're aware Live Chat is a good place to connect, get numbers, shoot the shit...
If you can promise to keep the poison out of your face today I'll be happy to quit with you.
Send me a PM if you want a phone number to begin building your brotherhood with.
-
Hey there. Introductions are great in a way of showing people exactly what you want them to know about you. Internet ones are even easier since its just the words your typing and people cannot determine tone or other verbal cues. I could sit here and type the least amount of information possible to gain your initial trust and gain the motivation from you guys to stay quit. But... I'm an asshole and a liar.
I am currently in the Air Force serving as a Staff Sergeant at Beale AFB, CA. I have been dipping for 14 years. 12 of said years, I constantly lied to my wife, my family, and myself about being quit over and over. I was not held accountable at any other moment than to hide more cans, or explain how a can just showed up somewhere in my house or my car.
I don't know about you guys but I have made promise after fucking promise to those who love me to stay quit, or to quit in general. I never have been able to uphold that promise to them. I never have internalized why I should quit in the first place. I have been just trying to satisfy their requests and it has never worked.
So recently my wife found out that I had been dipping again. The poor woman has put up with 12 years in this relationship of empty promises and has finally had it. We have a beautiful 2 year old daughter (and were planning on having more) and she is no longer willing to force her to grow up with a Dad who is going to kill himself and loves a fucking leaf more than his family. I understand. I made one final promise. I am done with fucking tobacco.
That said, I hovered about this website for about a week deciding if I could live up to the cold turkey no bullshit attitude you all bring to your members. I decided last night was the last piece of poison I would ever put in my lip again. All day clean with no nicotine, I log in to post this Intoduction, wondering after I write all this shit if trust and accountability can be EARNED instead of given. I almost caved before I got to the intro page. I going the Live Chat, talked to Lady G, MCO, and Knockout, flushed the hidden stash, and got in here to pour this intro out.
Day one is gone. Day two has begun. Fuck the Nicotine bitch. Roll has been posted. I quit with all of you today.
You sound ready AS. I want to point out a few things from your intro:
1. This quit has to be about you. The fact is we are selfish fucking addicts, and if you don't do this for yourself, you aren't going to last. Outside motivators are great, they are weapons to help fuel you during the rough times, but a selfish addiction requires a selfish quit. You have a lot to live for, so understand that it's now or never, life or death. Never Again For Any Reason (NAFAR)
2. You are not alone. Every person here has experienced the lies, hiding, and addict actions which plagued you during usage. Your family could not understand what this addiction is like because they were not users. We were, which makes lying here, to those fighting the same battle, unacceptable.
3. This is not like your other attempts. This place can save your life if you buy into the system. Read everything you can on the site; story's, speeches, words of wisdom. You were a slave to nic for 14 years. Educate yourself here, build relationships by reaching out (the people in your group are a good start), and DO NOT USE UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.
This will not be easy, but we can do it.
Post roll, keep your promise, and hold your brothers and sisters accountable. Repeat each day.
Welcome to KTC brother.
-
Hey there. Introductions are great in a way of showing people exactly what you want them to know about you. Internet ones are even easier since its just the words your typing and people cannot determine tone or other verbal cues. I could sit here and type the least amount of information possible to gain your initial trust and gain the motivation from you guys to stay quit. But... I'm an asshole and a liar.
I am currently in the Air Force serving as a Staff Sergeant at Beale AFB, CA. I have been dipping for 14 years. 12 of said years, I constantly lied to my wife, my family, and myself about being quit over and over. I was not held accountable at any other moment than to hide more cans, or explain how a can just showed up somewhere in my house or my car.
I don't know about you guys but I have made promise after fucking promise to those who love me to stay quit, or to quit in general. I never have been able to uphold that promise to them. I never have internalized why I should quit in the first place. I have been just trying to satisfy their requests and it has never worked.
So recently my wife found out that I had been dipping again. The poor woman has put up with 12 years in this relationship of empty promises and has finally had it. We have a beautiful 2 year old daughter (and were planning on having more) and she is no longer willing to force her to grow up with a Dad who is going to kill himself and loves a fucking leaf more than his family. I understand. I made one final promise. I am done with fucking tobacco.
That said, I hovered about this website for about a week deciding if I could live up to the cold turkey no bullshit attitude you all bring to your members. I decided last night was the last piece of poison I would ever put in my lip again. All day clean with no nicotine, I log in to post this Intoduction, wondering after I write all this shit if trust and accountability can be EARNED instead of given. I almost caved before I got to the intro page. I going the Live Chat, talked to Lady G, MCO, and Knockout, flushed the hidden stash, and got in here to pour this intro out.
Day one is gone. Day two has begun. Fuck the Nicotine bitch. Roll has been posted. I quit with all of you today.
You sound ready AS. I want to point out a few things from your intro:
1. This quit has to be about you. The fact is we are selfish fucking addicts, and if you don't do this for yourself, you aren't going to last. Outside motivators are great, they are weapons to help fuel you during the rough times, but a selfish addiction requires a selfish quit. You have a lot to live for, so understand that it's now or never, life or death. Never Again For Any Reason (NAFAR)
2. You are not alone. Every person here has experienced the lies, hiding, and addict actions which plagued you during usage. Your family could not understand what this addiction is like because they were not users. We were, which makes lying here, to those fighting the same battle, unacceptable.
3. This is not like your other attempts. This place can save your life if you buy into the system. Read everything you can on the site; story's, speeches, words of wisdom. You were a slave to nic for 14 years. Educate yourself here, build relationships by reaching out (the people in your group are a good start), and DO NOT USE UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.
This will not be easy, but we can do it.
Post roll, keep your promise, and hold your brothers and sisters accountable. Repeat each day.
Welcome to KTC brother.
I quit under similar circumstances. In addition to the constant lying to my wife I did also realize that I was killing myself with tobacco. The burden of the web of lies regarding the dip will melt away once you come clean. Do it immediately. You will become strong like superman. A better husband and father instantly. It's a wonderful feeling.
Be very open with your wife and have her read the spousal support section. This will help tremendously. Treat your wife like the most precious thing in the world. It is not her fault you're an addict. Get her on your side with honesty and genuine caring. She will be your biggest ally if you are just open and honest. Bare your soul to her.
Post roll every day and make friends here, or you will fail. Plain and simple. You need us for accountability. Without us you will fall back in a moment if weakness. Embrace the Ktc way. Go all in.
I quit with you today.
-
It was great chatting with you last night. This is the place to quit as you will find out. You will have all the support you can handle from all these bad ass quitters here.
I'm not going to try to sugar coat anything because you are in for a bumpy ride. As Grizz said,treat your family like they are the most precious thing in the world. Do not take out your anger on them. If you want to bitch at people, do it here or in chat. We can take it. Each any every single person in here has gone through what you are going through now.
Embrace the suck. Document how you are feeling in your intro. This will be the place you come back to to see your progress. Never, ever put that shit in your mouth again because you will not want to go through all these stages ever again.
There are 3 very basic rules here:
1) Post Roll Daily
2) Honor your word
3) Be active in the site
You follow the 3 and Nic free you will be.
Welcome aboard and as Grady pointed out, thanks for your service.
-
Not much to add other than Welcome.
You are.in good company. We are all liars and cheats.
One quick thing tho...are you an addict?
-
1st off. Loot, Raider, GHC, KO Con, each and every fuckin one of you needs to edit your posts and thank this man for being a member of our military. I don't give a flying fuck how many days quit you are, you need to give the proper respect due!!
Now......that right there is an intro! From a very proud Vet, thank you for your service 2nd. Welcome to the wonderful world of, "no more shit in my lip" Post roll every day with no bullshit excuses, get some digits off of people, get involved, step on some toes and speak your mind, hold others accountable and most importantly YOU STAY QUIT!
-
AS, Thank you for your service. 12 years is bad ass and I hope you make it 20. You have had some really strong quitters here in your intro. Please hear their words and heed the warnings. DO NOT try to do it your own way. KTC is the way to quit. Many times over people have come here to quit and try to put some kind of spin on the KTC quit. They all come crawling back admitting their mistakes. We addicts will help you, bring your game face, bring the attitude and the will power and we will help you through. The only cost you will ever pay is posting roll. Each and every freaking day you have to post your name in your quit group. That's it. I'm going to bow out now and watch your quit. If you need me for anything send me a private message.
Mogul
-
Tell us about your military service. How long have you been active duty? What's your AFSC? Where all have you been stationed? Etc
-
Beale? Damn, home to the U-2. Thanks for your service, lots of active duty, Guard, and retired guys here. You came to the right place. Stick around, you'll learn a lot. Hint...the more time you spend here, the greater your odds are. ODAAT, my brother.
-
Beale? Damn, home to the U-2. Thanks for your service, lots of active duty, Guard, and retired guys here. You came to the right place. Stick around, you'll learn a lot. Hint...the more time you spend here, the greater your odds are. ODAAT, my brother.
AntiSaint thank you for your service. You found the right place to support you in your quit. I want to throw my towel into your corner. I live in Carmicheal. When you are ready shoot me a PM and I will drive up to Wheatland and buy my new quit brother a beer.
Jerry
-
Welcome in bro.
This is the place, and the way, to do this right.
-
Welcome in bro.
This is the place, and the way, to do this right.
Welcome to day two AntiSaint! Just keep you word again today and you will NEVER have to do the day over again! That is awesome!
It was great to talk to you in chat and I love seeing your post today! Nice work!
Go crush day two!!!!
-
Work the program here, be involved. That's how you beat it and win. Day by day.
-
Tell us about your military service. How long have you been active duty? What's your AFSC? Where all have you been stationed? Etc
I have been in the Air Force for 8+ years. I started the first 6 years as a Aircrew Flight Equipment guy stationed at Hurlburt Field, FL. From there, I deployed 6 times during those first 6 years. Hit Mali, Djibouti, Iraq, Philippines among other places. I just recently retrained into a new job as a Geospatial Intelligence Analyst (1N171A). Which means I now sit in a giant steel box starting at computer screens all day! I have been at Beale AFB for about 18 months and expect to be here for at least 48 total.
-
Beale? Damn, home to the U-2. Thanks for your service, lots of active duty, Guard, and retired guys here. You came to the right place. Stick around, you'll learn a lot. Hint...the more time you spend here, the greater your odds are. ODAAT, my brother.
AntiSaint thank you for your service. You found the right place to support you in your quit. I want to throw my towel into your corner. I live in Carmicheal. When you are ready shoot me a PM and I will drive up to Wheatland and buy my new quit brother a beer.
Jerry
Next time I head down to Roseville for a couple brews from Yardhouse I will hit you up, I will PM you my number shortly...
-
Tell us about your military service. How long have you been active duty? What's your AFSC? Where all have you been stationed? Etc
I have been in the Air Force for 8+ years. I started the first 6 years as a Aircrew Flight Equipment guy stationed at Hurlburt Field, FL. From there, I deployed 6 times during those first 6 years. Hit Mali, Djibouti, Iraq, Philippines among other places. I just recently retrained into a new job as a Geospatial Intelligence Analyst (1N171A). Which means I now sit in a giant steel box starting at computer screens all day! I have been at Beale AFB for about 18 months and expect to be here for at least 48 total.
First of all, thank you for your service. Mad props.
Second of all, your situation is similar to mine. Quitting while on the road most if not all of the time. One piece of advice I learned early on is spend as much time on here as possible. Learn. Connect. Lean on your brothers. Count me as one of them.
Jack aka derv
-
Tell us about your military service. How long have you been active duty? What's your AFSC? Where all have you been stationed? Etc
I have been in the Air Force for 8+ years. I started the first 6 years as a Aircrew Flight Equipment guy stationed at Hurlburt Field, FL. From there, I deployed 6 times during those first 6 years. Hit Mali, Djibouti, Iraq, Philippines among other places. I just recently retrained into a new job as a Geospatial Intelligence Analyst (1N171A). Which means I now sit in a giant steel box starting at computer screens all day! I have been at Beale AFB for about 18 months and expect to be here for at least 48 total.
Nice. I had a job all lined up at AFSOC at Hurlburt. Unfortunately it was during a time when they weren't PCSing many people. My old boss from McChord was working there and had my desk ready. I know it would have been a great job. I spent 13 years AD and loved it. I had some great assignments which we can chat about later. I got out (voluntarily) back in Jan 98. Wife was working on her Masters and my number came up again for another trip to the land of sand. It was time for me to move on or get deployed again.
What your doing now sounds pretty damn cool. Thanks for sharing.
Damn glad to have you on board. I will PM ya later with my number. Keep on quitting.
-
Day four is wrapping up here, gotta get through the night! Shouldn't be too bad once my girls get back from daycare and work! Sitting alone at the house always sucks. First 3 days were entirely consumed with craving after craving. Shit blew, today has been the first where I have had decent stretches without thinking about it constantly. Not sure what else i have to report! Just tryin' to stay active on this bitch!
-
Day four is wrapping up here, gotta get through the night! Shouldn't be too bad once my girls get back from daycare and work! Sitting alone at the house always sucks. First 3 days were entirely consumed with craving after craving. Shit blew, today has been the first where I have had decent stretches without thinking about it constantly. Not sure what else i have to report! Just tryin' to stay active on this bitch!
Good for you, sounds about right. Keep up the outreach and strong work.
-
Day four is wrapping up here, gotta get through the night! Shouldn't be too bad once my girls get back from daycare and work! Sitting alone at the house always sucks. First 3 days were entirely consumed with craving after craving. Shit blew, today has been the first where I have had decent stretches without thinking about it constantly. Not sure what else i have to report! Just tryin' to stay active on this bitch!
On the same day as you Saint and I feel the exact same way. It's easier to battle the enemy you can see in front of you than the one sneaking around behind your back. I haven't had as many craves today, but the ones I've had have actually been tougher because I don't feel like the bottom of LOOT's shoe all the time. Great day outside, would normally have popped a dip. Beautiful walk downtown, dip. Have rec league bball playoffs tonight, dip before and after.
I made my promise and I'm sticking to it, today has just been a much different challenge than those fog days. Thanks for sharing!
-
The Quit has been a surprising fucking success! Every day I get thru this shit gets a tad easier and my resolve grows.
I got a lot of Softball coming up in the next two months so I just stocking up on seeds and gum, Made it through a game and BP already without it!
Honestly I have wondered what normal people do to handle certain situations or just to wind down (which was when I would dip), I still get cravings and ponder this. But through a majority of the day I think I experience exactly how non nicotine addicted people feel without it. FINE! 8 days nearly done, still QLF.
Antisaint
-
The Quit has been a surprising fucking success! Every day I get thru this shit gets a tad easier and my resolve grows.
I got a lot of Softball coming up in the next two months so I just stocking up on seeds and gum, Made it through a game and BP already without it!
Honestly I have wondered what normal people do to handle certain situations or just to wind down (which was when I would dip), I still get cravings and ponder this. But through a majority of the day I think I experience exactly how non nicotine addicted people feel without it. FINE! 8 days nearly done, still QLF.
Antisaint
That's awesome, AS, but NEVER let your guard down! Quit with you, amigo!!
-
The Quit has been a surprising fucking success! Every day I get thru this shit gets a tad easier and my resolve grows.
I got a lot of Softball coming up in the next two months so I just stocking up on seeds and gum, Made it through a game and BP already without it!
Honestly I have wondered what normal people do to handle certain situations or just to wind down (which was when I would dip), I still get cravings and ponder this. But through a majority of the day I think I experience exactly how non nicotine addicted people feel without it. FINE! 8 days nearly done, still QLF.
Antisaint
Sounds like a bad ass Sultan to me. Quit with you Saint.
-
So weird shit:
I go to bed last night in the the master bedroom. Wake up in the morning to my wife handing me my alarming phone. Here's the thing. I was in the spare bedroom. Apparently I sleep walked for the first time in my life. Strange... anyone experience weird shit like this?? Thoughts????
Also, done with game 1 of the 3 game set this week. All seeds. Heat was up to 106 and seeds dried my mouth up if I didnt sip water every 20 seconds. Didnt matter. Stayed quit like i promised. We also fucking smashed their asses 21-1 run rule 4th innning.
Antisaint
-
So weird shit:
I go to bed last night in the the master bedroom. Wake up in the morning to my wife handing me my alarming phone. Here's the thing. I was in the spare bedroom. Apparently I sleep walked for the first time in my life. Strange... anyone experience weird shit like this?? Thoughts????
Also, done with game 1 of the 3 game set this week. All seeds. Heat was up to 106 and seeds dried my mouth up if I didnt sip water every 20 seconds. Didnt matter. Stayed quit like i promised. We also fucking smashed their asses 21-1 run rule 4th innning.
Antisaint
Give it to em Saint! Never had a sleep walking issue, but I tried some weird tea last night that made me almost fall asleep walking down the hallway. I don't know if it was the tea or my body still trying to hit the reset on functioning without dip. Either way, glad to be quit with you today Sult-bro
-
AS,
Congrats on the 30, brother...a month....that's a HUGE small victory! Awesome job and proud to be a Sultan with you. EDD.
-
AS,
Congrats on the 30, brother...a month....that's a HUGE small victory! Awesome job and proud to be a Sultan with you. EDD.
Yes, well done.