KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: 30_Year_Skoal_Addict on June 20, 2017, 11:17:00 AM
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Over 30 years of dipping Skoal and I finally quit on 6/14/2017. Almost a week in and with the help of Smokey Mountain herbal snuff, I'm hanging tough!
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Hi Everyone,
Been on the can for 30yrs, once in a while switched to cigars, quit once for a few months once or twice. Back at it, 7 hrs off the can, sucks....Evil nicotine pushing B@$T@RD$! Looking forward to succeeding this time...not feeling all that confident in me, though.
30yA
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welcome.
Check your (Inbox 1) upper right corner of your screen.
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welcome.
Check your (Inbox 1) upper right corner of your screen.
P.S. This is a no nicotine site. That means all nicotine, including cigars.
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Looking forward to succeeding this time...not feeling all that confident in me, though.
Looking forward to something your not feeling confident you can do? You either want to quit or you don't. And because you stumbled across this website, it's most likely you want to quit the can. Everybody in here is quitting the can, and we're doing it one day at a time.
Wake up in the morning, post roll (a promise to you and everybody in here) you can and will quit, and when it gets rough (cause it will) come back to this site and read up, chat, vent, do whatever you got to do to make it through the day. Then repeat the next day. Quitting is that simple. Do you own your body, or does Nicotine own you? Hope to see you in the AM 30yr! You can do this!
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Looking forward to succeeding this time...not feeling all that confident in me, though.
Looking forward to something your not feeling confident you can do? You either want to quit or you don't. And because you stumbled across this website, it's most likely you want to quit the can. Everybody in here is quitting the can, and we're doing it one day at a time.
Wake up in the morning, post roll (a promise to you and everybody in here) you can and will quit, and when it gets rough (cause it will) come back to this site and read up, chat, vent, do whatever you got to do to make it through the day. Then repeat the next day. Quitting is that simple. Do you own your body, or does Nicotine own you? Hope to see you in the AM 30yr! You can do this!
Larry is right. Either Quit or don't.
No confidence in Quitting? Are you confident that you will die a fucking horrible death if you don't? I am.
Man up, get it done.
Is it gonna suck? yup
Is it gonna be hard? yup
Biggest challenge of your life? yup
Will you have support? yup
Will it save your life? YUP
You can do this!!!! How do I know? Because this site is packed with thousands of people just like you that are doing it.
Read up, learn, post roll every day, get it done!!! We are here to help you.
If I can be of any assistance feel free to PM me.
Brian
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Looking forward to succeeding this time...not feeling all that confident in me, though.
Looking forward to something your not feeling confident you can do? You either want to quit or you don't. And because you stumbled across this website, it's most likely you want to quit the can. Everybody in here is quitting the can, and we're doing it one day at a time.
Wake up in the morning, post roll (a promise to you and everybody in here) you can and will quit, and when it gets rough (cause it will) come back to this site and read up, chat, vent, do whatever you got to do to make it through the day. Then repeat the next day. Quitting is that simple. Do you own your body, or does Nicotine own you? Hope to see you in the AM 30yr! You can do this!
Larry is right. Either Quit or don't.
No confidence in Quitting? Are you confident that you will die a fucking horrible death if you don't? I am.
Man up, get it done.
Is it gonna suck? yup
Is it gonna be hard? yup
Biggest challenge of your life? yup
Will you have support? yup
Will it save your life? YUP
You can do this!!!! How do I know? Because this site is packed with thousands of people just like you that are doing it.
Read up, learn, post roll every day, get it done!!! We are here to help you.
If I can be of any assistance feel free to PM me.
Brian
30yA,
You scared? That is normal. Check: your human. These guys have pretty well said it. You have some kick ass quitters in your corner already. After a quick scan I'm not seeing a Day 1 post in Here. (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4289).
...that would be a good start. Then just worry about today. Beyond that, nothing matters, it doesn't exist. Today ONLY!
You got this, hold on though, gonna be a bumpy ride :)
CC
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Congrats on quitting 30, thats awesome!!! And yes, withdrawls do suck, but not NEARLY as bad as cancer, heart attack, death.
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I heard that tobacco is kicking the crap out of you today: sucker-punched you after the bell or something like that. Get mad, bro. Find something to hit. I'm fighting back too.
Ninereasons - Round 9
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It's great to see that you made it here today. I'm proud to quit with you.
Ninereasons - Day 10
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For whatever reason I feel the need to get this off my chest. Don't know why. I don't mean to be a downer or discourage anyone, just look at it as me journaling.
So I've made it to day 33, and, for the most part it has been easy. Too easy...actually scares me. Why? I know what happens when I get to the "seventh inning stretch" on my quit. You see I caved two times before. Once fifteen or so years ago, that quit lasted a few months, after that went to cigars, and eventually back to chew. Another time I was using a fake product called Rizla (sp?). The company stopped making it and I was too chickenshit to stay quit without it.
You see I know me. I know I'm an addict. I expect to fight this all the days of my life. I know that the minute I loose sight of that, my quit will be in jeopardy. My quit can NEVER go on autopilot. Knowing this makes it difficult to celebrate any milestones....I think the HOF day is just going to be another day to me, another day to stay quit. ditto for floor 2, 3, one year, comma, etc. When I look at some of the old HOF groups where no one is posting roll any more I think -that can never be for me. I'm an addict, always will be. I'll always need people to hold me accountable. I thank all of you for that
But you all will have to forgive me when I don't get giddy when I hit 100, 365, 1,000 or 10,000 cause i'll just be another addict quittin one day at a time.
30yr
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For whatever reason I feel the need to get this off my chest. Don't know why. I don't mean to be a downer or discourage anyone, just look at it as me journaling.
So I've made it to day 33, and, for the most part it has been easy. Too easy...actually scares me. Why? I know what happens when I get to the "seventh inning stretch" on my quit. You see I caved two times before. Once fifteen or so years ago, that quit lasted a few months, after that went to cigars, and eventually back to chew. Another time I was using a fake product called Rizla (sp?). The company stopped making it and I was too chickenshit to stay quit without it.
You see I know me. I know I'm an addict. I expect to fight this all the days of my life. I know that the minute I loose sight of that, my quit will be in jeopardy. My quit can NEVER go on autopilot. Knowing this makes it difficult to celebrate any milestones....I think the HOF day is just going to be another day to me, another day to stay quit. ditto for floor 2, 3, one year, comma, etc. When I look at some of the old HOF groups where no one is posting roll any more I think -that can never be for me. I'm an addict, always will be. I'll always need people to hold me accountable. I thank all of you for that
But you all will have to forgive me when I don't get giddy when I hit 100, 365, 1,000 or 10,000 cause i'll just be another addict quittin one day at a time.
30yr
I know what you mean 30yr. The wad is my autopilot. When I start to coast, it's downhill from there.
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For whatever reason I feel the need to get this off my chest. Don't know why. I don't mean to be a downer or discourage anyone, just look at it as me journaling.
So I've made it to day 33, and, for the most part it has been easy. Too easy...actually scares me. Why? I know what happens when I get to the "seventh inning stretch" on my quit. You see I caved two times before. Once fifteen or so years ago, that quit lasted a few months, after that went to cigars, and eventually back to chew. Another time I was using a fake product called Rizla (sp?). The company stopped making it and I was too chickenshit to stay quit without it.
You see I know me. I know I'm an addict. I expect to fight this all the days of my life. I know that the minute I loose sight of that, my quit will be in jeopardy. My quit can NEVER go on autopilot. Knowing this makes it difficult to celebrate any milestones....I think the HOF day is just going to be another day to me, another day to stay quit. ditto for floor 2, 3, one year, comma, etc. When I look at some of the old HOF groups where no one is posting roll any more I think -that can never be for me. I'm an addict, always will be. I'll always need people to hold me accountable. I thank all of you for that
But you all will have to forgive me when I don't get giddy when I hit 100, 365, 1,000 or 10,000 cause i'll just be another addict quittin one day at a time.
30yr
Right on Brother. Like Harry Calahan said, "A man's got to know his limitations". We have to stay vigilant on our Quit.
Thanks for posting that 30.
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For whatever reason I feel the need to get this off my chest. Don't know why. I don't mean to be a downer or discourage anyone, just look at it as me journaling.
So I've made it to day 33, and, for the most part it has been easy. Too easy...actually scares me. Why? I know what happens when I get to the "seventh inning stretch" on my quit. You see I caved two times before. Once fifteen or so years ago, that quit lasted a few months, after that went to cigars, and eventually back to chew. Another time I was using a fake product called Rizla (sp?). The company stopped making it and I was too chickenshit to stay quit without it.
You see I know me. I know I'm an addict. I expect to fight this all the days of my life. I know that the minute I loose sight of that, my quit will be in jeopardy. My quit can NEVER go on autopilot. Knowing this makes it difficult to celebrate any milestones....I think the HOF day is just going to be another day to me, another day to stay quit. ditto for floor 2, 3, one year, comma, etc. When I look at some of the old HOF groups where no one is posting roll any more I think -that can never be for me. I'm an addict, always will be. I'll always need people to hold me accountable. I thank all of you for that
But you all will have to forgive me when I don't get giddy when I hit 100, 365, 1,000 or 10,000 cause i'll just be another addict quittin one day at a time.
30yr
Good words there 30 ...... that is where true strength comes from, knowing where we are weak. This is also the best "anti-cave" attitude there is. Keep on fighting brother, I'm glad your here!
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written from the heart....i relate to it all.....yes, the last time i 'quit' snuff i too was drawn back in by smoking cigars at a friend's after dinner. this went on for a few months and i was hooked again...back to eating dirt.
the good news is, i suppose, that each time we 'quit' we give our bodies some breathing space....give it an interlude to heal...some space to revive itself....you keep fighting, my friend, and i will too.
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For whatever reason I feel the need to get this off my chest. Don't know why. I don't mean to be a downer or discourage anyone, just look at it as me journaling.
So I've made it to day 33, and, for the most part it has been easy. Too easy...actually scares me. Why? I know what happens when I get to the "seventh inning stretch" on my quit. You see I caved two times before. Once fifteen or so years ago, that quit lasted a few months, after that went to cigars, and eventually back to chew. Another time I was using a fake product called Rizla (sp?). The company stopped making it and I was too chickenshit to stay quit without it.
You see I know me. I know I'm an addict. I expect to fight this all the days of my life. I know that the minute I loose sight of that, my quit will be in jeopardy. My quit can NEVER go on autopilot. Knowing this makes it difficult to celebrate any milestones....I think the HOF day is just going to be another day to me, another day to stay quit. ditto for floor 2, 3, one year, comma, etc. When I look at some of the old HOF groups where no one is posting roll any more I think -that can never be for me. I'm an addict, always will be. I'll always need people to hold me accountable. I thank all of you for that
But you all will have to forgive me when I don't get giddy when I hit 100, 365, 1,000 or 10,000 cause i'll just be another addict quittin one day at a time.
30yr
Ditto on the future timeline concerns.
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Should get stickied in the "words of wisdom" thread
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the good news is, i suppose, that each time we 'quit' we give our bodies some breathing space....give it an interlude to heal...some space to revive itself....you keep fighting, my friend, and i will too.
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
UBER FAIL- There is no good news here, your rationalizing your failure. taking a break isnt success. QUIT IS SUCCESS. Stop looking behind you and start looking ahead. Cut those strings Sand. There is no partial victory here. Your ALL IN or your out.
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This partial roll call was from the May 2011 group. We were between days 44 to 72. Some of the symptoms of early withdrawal are known to occur here: fogs, funk, depression and craves. Triggers still exist in our quit. Be on your guard. Knowledge is power.
-30-
For extra credit, one of these quitters disappeared one week to the day of this roll call....care to guess which one?
Tuesday, 5 April 2011
QOTD =What part of your quit is the most difficult right now?
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30yrAddict -52- The fog is back.
Junkman - day 70 - The occasional fog sucks, but the cravings are gone.
MDfee - 61 - baseball
Ninereasons - day 50 - the most difficult part right now is all behind me.
Fuggles day 56 bullshit at work and baseball
ODAAT - 64 - some dizziness and anxiety, but all is well most of the time
Newcal - Day 47 - Worst part.. dizziness and fog are back. no craves though.
nomosko -59- The 50's have been the worst so far. I keep reminding myself that 1-7 were worst but I am having a hard time convincing myself. I quit.
franklin - 49 - filling up with gas and not going to the counter for a tin of turd
J2b - 72 - pure rage at little things, AD oh wait, look at that.
grsshppr 44 overconfidence
bryank - 72 - Every pain in the jaw and worrying about my health.
associatejohn - Day 60 - Late term blahs, constant need for the fake stuff
Bigmac869-Day 49-been having psychological battles lately. "this would be a great time for a fatty" my mind says..."fuck you, mind!" is what I say back to it. Didn't have a lot if these battles until recently...
Razz - Day 59 - the suck and the fog are returning......made sure to have a supply of the fake stuff at all times.
rob2857- Day 72- Watching friends dip/ reccuring cravings
mitchell10-day 71-Having some dip dreams (bumped x 3)
Xander - Day 57 - Golf and Baseball
retreadcpt- Day 44- I'm having dip dreams and I think about it all the time, not cravings, though.
Drewm74-Day 70-The occasional semi-crave, but hen I remind myself that I like having a few extra dollars that would have normally gone towards crap in the can. (bumped)
Magnum- 49- Ran out of Hooch, trying to fight the oral fixation issue now. Almost worse than fighting the nic bitch.
RickS - day 72... I'd have to agree with rob, watching friends dip... Although it hasn't been that bad, I'm mainly quitting so my boy doesn't have to grow up around this shit like I did... That really keeps me on task...
WV8VFD - 51 - WORK
oink229 - day 57 - Whatever causes stress or pisses me off.
Crazyjerry - day 66 - remembering to post roll
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Day 55
Went out to dinner tonight with my wife. As busy parents of 4 and grandparents of 1, my wife and I go out to dinner very seldom, perhaps 2-3 times a year. Tonight was one of those nights. It was also the first time ever that a can did not come along with us. Its times like these that I savor the victory that I have won over nicotine. Feels good, Feels like freedom.
30
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Awesome 30yr. Isn't it great when we can enjoy the family time without having to squeeze it in between a full schedule of dipping.
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Day 55
Went out to dinner tonight with my wife. As busy parents of 4 and grandparents of 1, my wife and I go out to dinner very seldom, perhaps 2-3 times a year. Tonight was one of those nights. It was also the first time ever that a can did not come along with us. Its times like these that I savor the victory that I have won over nicotine. Feels good, Feels like freedom.
30
Agreed ! Life is so much better without Nicotine !! You have only started scratching the surface... It just gets better!
STAY QUIT
Greg
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Day 57
Life just keeps getting better. I took my daughter to church last night, I was happy to take her. I'm ashamed to admit that was not always the case: drive time used to be my time to feed my addiction, passengers were not welcome.
I paused yesterday to think about how my family always got to see me at my worst, they always got to see me in withdrawal, when I couldn't wait to sneak away and feed the need. The nic-be-otch and I always met in secret. I'm not her prisoner any more....
The chains are falling away....
30
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Life just keeps getting better. I took my daughter to church last night, I was happy to take her. I'm ashamed to admit that was not always the case: drive time used to be my time to feed my addiction, passengers were not welcome.
I paused yesterday to think about how my family always got to see me at my worst, they always got to see me in withdrawal, when I couldn't wait to sneak away and feed the need. The nic-be-otch and I always met in secret. I'm not her prisoner any more....
The chains are falling away....
30
'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
thats some goo shit right there 30. life is so much better without the bitch hanging around.
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Day 60
Tonight I was in the car and I had a crave. It was stronger than typical. Stronger than I have had in quite a while. I thought about the "nirvana dip" that I would get if I caved after 60 days. I ran my tongue along my bottom lip, the one that was cut up before, but now is nice and smooth. A dip wouldn't even burn, It would feel so good right there... Lies all f'ing LIES. I'm an addict, buying lies. Nirvana dip, my foot...Dip good, hell most of the time, I almost puked it out when I was done with it, gagging the dip into the spitter.
Was I close to caving? If I was not on guard, sure. If I wasn't informed, sure. If I didn't have anyone to be accountable to, sure. If I didn't remember how hard it was to get this far, sure. Being here keeps me reminded of all these things. Being a part of this community keeps me quit. Of that I am sure.
Thank YOU.
30
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Life just keeps getting better. I took my daughter to church last night, I was happy to take her. I'm ashamed to admit that was not always the case: drive time used to be my time to feed my addiction, passengers were not welcome.
I paused yesterday to think about how my family always got to see me at my worst, they always got to see me in withdrawal, when I couldn't wait to sneak away and feed the need. The nic-be-otch and I always met in secret. I'm not her prisoner any more....
The chains are falling away....
30
The whole drive time thing rang true with me - and how I always wanted to go to lunches in someone else's car so my spit bottle did not roll out from under my seat - or glove box accidentally opens and reveals the 5 pack of fresh cope - all the hiding - it is embarrassing to think about it now (Day 3 for me) - but I am not gonna miss that - glad you enjoyed time with your baby girl 30
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Great work 30! Your quit is inspiring others.
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Life just keeps getting better. I took my daughter to church last night, I was happy to take her. I'm ashamed to admit that was not always the case: drive time used to be my time to feed my addiction, passengers were not welcome.
I paused yesterday to think about how my family always got to see me at my worst, they always got to see me in withdrawal, when I couldn't wait to sneak away and feed the need. The nic-be-otch and I always met in secret. I'm not her prisoner any more....
The chains are falling away....
30
wonderful....... i know about the drive to dip.... take the long way home, trips to the store alone.....driver only.....
will be nice to enjoy life with the people we love rather than the weed out to kill us
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Life just keeps getting better. I took my daughter to church last night, I was happy to take her. I'm ashamed to admit that was not always the case: drive time used to be my time to feed my addiction, passengers were not welcome.
I paused yesterday to think about how my family always got to see me at my worst, they always got to see me in withdrawal, when I couldn't wait to sneak away and feed the need. The nic-be-otch and I always met in secret. I'm not her prisoner any more....
The chains are falling away....
30
wonderful....... i know about the drive to dip.... take the long way home, trips to the store alone.....driver only.....
will be nice to enjoy life with the people we love rather than the weed out to kill us
One of the side benefits of quitting !! I spend more time with family and friends now and truely enjoy being with them.
Life ROCKS without nic. It just keeps getting better !!
STAY QUIT
Greg
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Day 65 and raging like a new quitter....If future me is reading this: KEEP THAT SHIT OUT OF YER LIP! 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head'
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30 - know this...you're bad ass. dip is stupid.
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30 - know this...you're bad ass. dip is stupid.
Thanks for the encouragement, boiler. At this point in my quit the good days outnumber the bad about 10 to 1. But I still have days of Fog, rage and brief craves. Need to get my fat posterior into some cardio workout, or the next thing you know I'll be raging on "the biggest loser".
30
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30 - know this...you're bad ass. dip is stupid.
Thanks for the encouragement, boiler. At this point in my quit the good days outnumber the bad about 10 to 1. But I still have days of Fog, rage and brief craves. Need to get my fat posterior into some cardio workout, or the next thing you know I'll be raging on "the biggest loser".
30
Monday is my cardio day as well. I saved up some money and bought a heart rate monitor that can download my workout info to my computer (Polar). I'm a dork when it comes to numbers/stats/tracking information. I think that's one reason I love baseball. anywho, i find that by tracking items like minutes/miles/heart rate as well as pounds, waistline not to mention days quit, I'm able to hold myself accountable because one thing I cannot stand is an incomplete spreadsheet or missing numbers. it gets my mind off nic, i find something else to track. last week, i spent 30 minutes in my office (not working) and tracked how many people walked by my office. it got me through my crave.
like i said, i'm a dork and tracking/numbers may not be your thing. But, you have a thing, everyone does. Know what that is and use it to your advantage.
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30-Just so you know, your Quit is very inspirational to me. I dipped for 30 years also so I know that you are painfully aware of how it involved every aspect of my life. All the lies I would tell my girlfriend so I could sneak home and succumb to the nic bitch.
I post Roll Call and continue to be inspired by your Quit. I am proud and honored to be Quit with you! Peace
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Day 70
Today I want to pause and give some thanks. Some will read this and know that you have helped my quit. Your correction, your encouragement and your humor have been anchor points in my journey of quit. Some will read this and never know how much helped me...perhaps it was a post I read, something in your introduction, something in your hall of fame speech. I thank you all that took the time to leave a legacy for me. For all of you that I have been able to support- the opportunity to support you is a gift to me. My quit is strengthened by you. You all continually inspire me with your determination and guts.
My deepest thanks.
30
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You da man. We all da man. We quit with ya. Thank you too.
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I see that you are getting out what you put in...which is a lot. Thanks for all the support. I would quit with you any day of the week. Well done.
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I thought the title was Withdrawal Sex, I was just gonna ask how you talked her into that one LOL
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I thought the title was Withdrawal Sex, I was just gonna ask how you talked her into that one LOL
been together 19yrs...tried every trick in the book especially the ones that didn't require cash outlay. This one seemed worth tryin' ;)
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I thought the title was Withdrawal Sex, I was just gonna ask how you talked her into that one LOL
been together 19yrs...tried every trick in the book especially the ones that didn't require cash outlay. This one seemed worth tryin' ;)
Yea I hear ya. Shiny stuff still works the best with mine :D
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I see that you are getting out what you put in...which is a lot. Thanks for all the support. I would quit with you any day of the week. Well done.
x2
You're a great quitter, 30yearAddict. It's guys like you that make this place work.
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My Quit is better because of you. Honored to be Quit with you. Thank You! Today I posted Roll Call and today I am Quit. (Day 9!) Peace
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
God Bless 30. Prayers to you and yours.
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My thoughts and prayers are with you 30. Please let me know if there is anything I can do. Peace
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Thanks reb and peace. It means a lot to me.
Dale
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
Gold Bless 30. Prayers to you and yours.
X2
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
God Bless 30. Prayers to you and yours.
X2
(fixed typo in my post)
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
Hopefully I dont even need to say this, but you need anything you let me know. If nothing else, we can both give UST one of these
Hey, UST 'Finger' 'Finger' 'arse' 'arse'
Seriously, you are doing major damage to the ranks of loyal UST customers. Keep it up bro, you are saving lives.
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Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. Good to be quit with you today.
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
Sorry 30, you and your family are in my thoughts as well...
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
Gold Bless 30. Prayers to you and yours.
X2
X3, i'm in on this crusade.
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
Gold Bless 30. Prayers to you and yours.
X2
X3, i'm in on this crusade.
Prayers
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Sending prayers out on behalf of your family 30 year
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
Gold Bless 30. Prayers to you and yours.
X2
X3, i'm in on this crusade.
Prayers
Stay strong.
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Thanks to all of you for your support. I am overwhelmed by it. I am proud to be quit with all of you.
Dale
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Hang in there 30...
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Thinking Praying for you and your family.
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30 - Right here with you. Peace
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Day 82: Logging the Journey...
Lots of depression over the past week. Separate from the family stuff, can't put my finger on what so I assume this is the "funk". FU nic... I'm QUIT.
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Day 82:Â Logging the Journey...
Lots of depression over the past week. Separate from the family stuff, can't put my finger on what so I assume this is the "funk". FU nic... I'm QUIT.
Life is funny man. It absolutely sucks sometimes.
Read this. (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3953)
We've all walked our own path, but I know the journey you're on. Dipping fixes nothing. You CAN make it through this.
Thanks for all you do around here, and I'll see you tomorrow.
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Day 82: Logging the Journey...
Lots of depression over the past week. Separate from the family stuff, can't put my finger on what so I assume this is the "funk". FU nic... I'm QUIT.
My depression started in the late 60's and went through the 80's. Didn't break out until 89 or 90, just in the last week. Stay strong brother. My doctor said this is a year long journey of ups and downs....we can make it together.
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Day 82:Â Logging the Journey...
Lots of depression over the past week. Separate from the family stuff, can't put my finger on what so I assume this is the "funk". FU nic... I'm QUIT.
My depression started in the late 60's and went through the 80's. Didn't break out until 89 or 90, just in the last week. Stay strong brother. My doctor said this is a year long journey of ups and downs....we can make it together.
Thanks for the encouragement ODAAT. Today was actually a much better day. It helps to be reminded that the withdrawal symptoms are temporary. Together we will get through this indeed!
:)
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Day 82:Â Logging the Journey...
Lots of depression over the past week. Separate from the family stuff, can't put my finger on what so I assume this is the "funk". FU nic... I'm QUIT.
Life is funny man. It absolutely sucks sometimes.
Read this. (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3953)
We've all walked our own path, but I know the journey you're on. Dipping fixes nothing. You CAN make it through this.
Thanks for all you do around here, and I'll see you tomorrow.
Some real words of wisdom there, NOLAQ. Damn right nic doesn't solve anything, but it sure works hard to convince you it does. That crap's all in our mind. There is no way anyone but another addict who has quit could understand. Thanks for that, and thanks for all of your support of me and all the folks here.
Glad to be quit with you,
30
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Day 84: The Decision to be Free
Every time I do something without nic, I realize how much my addiction held me back, how it cheated me out of bits and pieces of life. Time that I could of been spending with family and friends, but, instead I was sneaking off to feed my addiction. Time spent between dipping and planning the next dip. Being grumpy when I was "trapped" in situations where I couldn't dip. You know things like family outings, visits to friends, mission trips, every part of life that should have been the most enjoyable. Cheated, by some stupid addiction. One that was cleverly engineered by big tobacc-0. No more. The decision's final. I'm finally free.
I know the nic bitch is still gonna knock on my door. It's bolted. It's not getting unbolted. Because I know that life without her is so much better than life ever was with her. The "stress" she used to relieve is gone. Sure I have life stresses, but they will be there with or without nic. Nic didn't help me cope with those anyway. Matter of fact she added a significant number of stress-ors to my life - cancer fear, acid reflux, hyper-tension, withdrawal stress and dental problems, among others. Perhaps the worst was that defeated feeling every time I took a dip. My first post here is the first post in this thread:
Hi Everyone,
Been on the can for 30yrs, once in a while switched to cigars, quit once for a few months once or twice. Back at it, 7 hrs off the can, sucks....Evil nicotine pushing B@$T@RD$! Looking forward to succeeding this time...not feeling all that confident in me, though.
30yA
...pathetically weak. Already telling everyone I wasn't strong enough. When I read this, I would have bet against me quitting. So how did I get to this point? What changed?
The turning point in my quit was when my "want to" quit gave way to my decision to be quit. It happened about day 3 or 4 for me. In the words of my May group, that's when I grew my 3rd Ball. It's when I had my first "good day", I decided that I would pursue this freedom. No matter how tough it was, I wanted freedom from this. I wanted the rest of my days lived without this addiction robbing me of joy that was rightfully mine. That pursuit has had some tough times. But those tough times have made victory that much sweeter. Now, 84 days in, my quit is priceless to me. How do you put a price on Freedom?
So to those of you who are newly quit: I know you "want" to stay quit. We all "wanted" to quit. Did you make the decision to quit today? That no matter what you were going to live up to your promise to not use today? No matter what stresses come up. No matter what triggers there are to tempt you. Have you decided to be Quit? It's a simple concept with 100% chance of success. It'll lead you to freedom. It is beyond compare. You will look back and be overwhelmed by what you got back. I promise.
Stay quit my friends,
30
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Day 84: The Decision to be Free
Every time I do something without nic, I realize how much my addiction held me back, how it cheated me out of bits and pieces of life. Time that I could of been spending with family and friends, but, instead I was sneaking off to feed my addiction. Time spent between dipping and planning the next dip. Being grumpy when I was "trapped" in situations where I couldn't dip. You know things like family outings, visits to friends, mission trips, every part of life that should have been the most enjoyable. Cheated, by some stupid addiction. One that was cleverly engineered by big tobacc0. No more. The decision's final. I'm finally free.
I know the nic bitch is still gonna knock on my door. It's bolted. It's not getting unbolted. Because I know that life without her is so much better than life ever was with her. The "stress" she used to relieve is gone. Sure I have life stresses, but they will be there with or without nic. Nic didn't help me cope with those anyway. Matter of fact she added a significant number of stress-ors to my life - cancer fear, acid reflux, hyper-tension, withdrawal stress and dental problems, among others.
The turning point in my quit was when my "want to" quit gave way to my decision to be quit. It happened about day 3 or 4 for me. In the words of my May group, that's when I grew my 3rd Ball. It's when I had my first "good day", I decided that I would pursue this freedom. No matter how tough it was, I wanted freedom from this. I wanted the rest of my days lived without this addiction robbing me of joy that was rightfully mine. That pursuit has had some tough times. But those tough times have made victory that much sweeter. Now, 84 days in, my quit is priceless to me. How do you put a price on Freedom?
So to those of you who are newly quit: I know you "want" to stay quit. We all "wanted" to quit. Did you make the decision to quit today? That no matter what you were going to live up to your promise to not use today? No matter what stresses come up. No matter what triggers there are to tempt you. Have you decided to be Quit? It's a simple concept with 100% chance of success. It'll lead you to freedom. It is beyond compare. You will look back and be overwhelmed by what you got back. I promise.
Stay quit my friends,
30
Very wise words indeed.
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Day 84: The Decision to be Free
Every time I do something without nic, I realize how much my addiction held me back, how it cheated me out of bits and pieces of life. Time that I could of been spending with family and friends, but, instead I was sneaking off to feed my addiction. Time spent between dipping and planning the next dip. Being grumpy when I was "trapped" in situations where I couldn't dip. You know things like family outings, visits to friends, mission trips, every part of life that should have been the most enjoyable. Cheated, by some stupid addiction. One that was cleverly engineered by big tobacc0. No more. The decision's final. I'm finally free.
I know the nic bitch is still gonna knock on my door. It's bolted. It's not getting unbolted. Because I know that life without her is so much better than life ever was with her. The "stress" she used to relieve is gone. Sure I have life stresses, but they will be there with or without nic.  Nic didn't help me cope with those anyway. Matter of fact she added a significant number of stress-ors to my life - cancer fear, acid reflux, hyper-tension, withdrawal stress and dental problems, among others. Perhaps the worst was that defeated feeling every time I took a dip. My first post here is the first post in this thread:
Hi Everyone,
Been on the can for 30yrs, once in a while switched to cigars, quit once for a few months once or twice. Back at it, 7 hrs off the can, sucks....Evil nicotine pushing B@$T@RD$! Looking forward to succeeding this time...not feeling all that confident in me, though.
30yA
...pathetically weak. Already telling everyone I wasn't strong enough. When I read this, I would have bet against me quitting. So how did I get to this point? What changed?
The turning point in my quit was when my "want to" quit gave way to my decision to be quit. It happened about day 3 or 4 for me. In the words of my May group, that's when I grew my 3rd Ball. It's when I had my first "good day", I decided that I would pursue this freedom. No matter how tough it was, I wanted freedom from this. I wanted the rest of my days lived without this addiction robbing me of joy that was rightfully mine. That pursuit has had some tough times. But those tough times have made victory that much sweeter. Now, 84 days in, my quit is priceless to me. How do you put a price on Freedom?
So to those of you who are newly quit: I know you "want" to stay quit. We all "wanted" to quit. Did you make the decision to quit today? That no matter what you were going to live up to your promise to not use today? No matter what stresses come up. No matter what triggers there are to tempt you. Have you decided to be Quit? It's a simple concept with 100% chance of success. It'll lead you to freedom. It is beyond compare. You will look back and be overwhelmed by what you got back. I promise.
Stay quit my friends,
30
Very wise words indeed.
Thanks Ready,
It's a good thing I don't have to cite my sources, cause most of that is paraphrased wisdom from a lot of quitters here at KTC, including the "burn your boats, men" and "caving is not an option" from your signature. Thanks for your support in these 84 days. I am indebted to you.
PROUD to be quit with you,
30
PS hope you don't mind the edit.
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Look whose got quit envy now. That's an encouraging post, 30.
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30-Very inspirational words. Thank you for that and for all the support. Proud to be Quit with you. Peace
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'army' 'army' 'army'
In deepest appreciation of our Vets.
Have a good weekend, All!
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Day 112
So May 2011 has dropped below the line. We are already seeing some start to drift away a bit, as happened in all of the other groups. Some feel that they are ready to face this addiction without need of "daily supervision".
For me, I know the concepts, have the tools. I am still gonna post. The daily accountability is important, but, at least as important is the daily reminder that I am an addict. For me that is something that will help keep me vigilant. I think that is what trips up those who wander and then end up caving... they forget how powerful the addiction is, how hard it was to quit, how easy it is to be seduced back in. -Time will tell how the "drifters" make out.
I am not taking any chances. I am PROUD of this quit, as proud as anything I have ever done. I am gonna protect it. Whatever it takes.
Who is with me?
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Day 112
So May 2011 has dropped below the line. We are already seeing some start to drift away a bit, as happened in all of the other groups. Some feel that they are ready to face this addiction without need of "daily supervision".
For me, I know the concepts, have the tools. I am still gonna post. The daily accountability is important, but, at least as important is the daily reminder that I am an addict. For me that is something that will help keep me vigilant. I think that is what trips up those who wander and then end up caving... they forget how powerful the addiction is, how hard it was to quit, how easy it is to be seduced back in. -Time will tell how the "drifters" make out.
I am not taking any chances. I am PROUD of this quit, as proud as anything I have ever done. I am gonna protect it. Whatever it takes.
Who is with me?
I agree, 30. At the same time that the struggle gets easier, complacency gets stronger. I know that the on-going accountability will keep me moving forward. At this point, whatever keeps me from complacency keeps me quit.
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This is a great point for me (all) to keep in mind. I'm through 15 days and know that I absolutely can't get too comfortable - no matter how good/strong i feel.
My goal is to get to a point where I no longer have to post on a daily basis, but post because I want to. I think that a lot of the vets that continue to show up each day are in that situation. I can't speak for them, but know that their committment, support, and involvement are a big deal to me.
Until that day comes (if it ever does), I will be here leaning on my quit bros.
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Day 136
On one of the threads today, a quitter mentioned that he felt like he was loosing himself by loosing all of his addictions. That mindset is certainly something I can relate to as it is a part of my "addict brain". That part of the brain that I have to make a conscious choice to battle every day.
The first few years of my dipping, I felt bad ass about it. It was a baseball player/ lumberjack thing. It kind of sticks in your subconscious that way. Coffee was the same way, and likewise for alcohol...It was the "adult" thing to do. Made me feel badass when I had some coffee at 12, just like the grown ups, just like my dad. Or when I was sneaking that swig, just like my older brothers..I'd like to say that I've grown up a little since then, but there are many parts of my brain that have not. I am in the process of retraining my brain to understand that chew is not cool, it is not a badass, grown up, baseball player, lumberjack thing to do. I am also teaching it that coffee has nothing to do with being grown up, nothing to do with being a man, ..Problem is, those parts of my brain still want to be 12. They don't want to be taught to be different than they have been. After all, I've left those parts of my brain that way for over 30 years.
While I am glad that progress has been made, the retraining is nowhere near complete. To some extent, it may not be for the rest of my life. The good news is despite ups and downs, the battle gets easier even if it is never over. I do know one thing: there is no standing still, no treading water. Every day is a push for progress. Every day is a day to overcome my addict's brain. The first step is to remind myself that I am an addict. The day I get up and forget that is the day I start sliding backwards into the abyss of addiction. That is why I am here. So I don't forget.
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Good shit dude. Damned good. Thanks for taking the time top post it.
Quit re-affirmed tonight. Now looking forward to roll call tomorrow and busting out another 24 of lickably clean
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Good shit dude. Damned good. Thanks for taking the time top post it.
Quit re-affirmed tonight. Now looking forward to roll call tomorrow and busting out another 24 of lickably clean
Agree. Good shit 30. Quit for 33 days now and I'm 33-0 waging this daily battle. At least once a day my addict brains says "A lipper would sure be nice right now." Always happens with a trigger. And the NB always loses, because my non-addict brain is stronger, more so every day.
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Good shit dude. Damned good. Thanks for taking the time top post it.
Quit re-affirmed tonight. Now looking forward to roll call tomorrow and busting out another 24 of lickably clean
Agree. Good shit 30. Quit for 33 days now and I'm 33-0 waging this daily battle. At least once a day my addict brains says "A lipper would sure be nice right now." Always happens with a trigger. And the NB always loses, because my non-addict brain is stronger, more so every day.
Hang in the JT, you obviously have the right attitude but as I felt at day 33, you long for a day where you might not have to battle so hard to still defeat the nic bitch. You will get there. I always thought of my days or cravings as a boxing match against the bitch. I can say that I haven't thought that way in quite some time.
But I will say that remembering those days are what keep me quit. Embrace the suck and embrace the cravings as they really will help you stay quit.
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Day 152---
Today I used my numbers for the first time. Sure, I've texted back and forth, but never because I was having a hard time. Today was different...
The nic beotch was pursuing me today, crave after crave! Usually, I just stay busy and they pass. Today, however I felt like I was possessed. My addict brain was trying to win out over my "thinking brain". I don't even think days 1 or 2 were this bad. I sat there in amazement, almost as if I was a spectator in the whole thing. How in the world can this be happening after 152 days???? It finally got so bad that I decided to text my May bro J2B. You know there is a lot of power in that? All damn day, I struggled with those craves, but a couple of texts back and forth, and she was done for! Nic Bitch tucked her tail in and ran, her cover blown, her lies debunked. Not a single damn crave the rest of the day! The support of my brothers and sisters is awesome! My addiction flees in the face of it!
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Nice reaction on your part. Call in the troops whenever necessary. Score one for the good guys. 'Finger' nic.
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That's awesome shit 30. Proof positive I would say. Good quitting bro.
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Thanks for sharing that. I also had massive craves yesterday---crave after crave after crave--I came close to calling someone, but my wife helped me talk it out.
I think it takes a better part of a year to work to get past all the triggers and major craves. This quit/addiction is a process where the addiction weakens bit by bit every day we deny the bitch--however, the addiction never leaves completely just becomes dormant (why we always remain vigilant). Every day that passes, we gain more control!
I am proud to quit with you!
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Way to use the resources 30. I never thought I would have to use them. I really probably did not have to, but what it does is give you another level of accountability. One on a more personal level.
You send a guy a text message saying you are struggling but you won't use the shit, you just gave that guy a handshake saying you won't use. Better yet, call someone and give them your word, your actual word that you will not use the shit.
I don't understand why some people are afraid to use their resources or fail to do so. At any given moment I know you, J2B, nine, razz, SM... whoever is going to be willing to help.
Here is the bottom line. Its not that big of a deal to me if you wake me up at 1 am because your struggling. You know why, because its a BIG fucking deal if you cave.
New quitters got to get over the macho "I can handle this myself" and start being a little more humble.
Use your resources.
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Day 159 and feel like ranting.....
'blowup'
Why is this so hard for some people? It's pretty simple, really simple, f'ing cave man simple:
1. Post Roll EVERDAY
2. DO IT EARLY, FIRST THING IN YOUR DAY, preferably before you have your morning coffee, bm, or whatever.
3. HONOR YOUR PROMISE
So much of the drama comes from people wanting to modify those 3 little steps. Then they get their panties in a bunch when someone calls them on it. Why do we have to argue about those steps? If someone cannot do those three little things they don't belong here. So the next time someone says they are going to leave the site because someone called them on this bs, please don't try to come to their rescue. Make them invest something in their own quit. If they won't, bid them good luck, godspeed and adios!
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Needed to be said. Again. Get with the program.
Btw, I like to post roll drinking coffee while on the throne. :blink:
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Day 159 and feel like ranting.....
'blowup'
Why is this so hard for some people? It's pretty simple, really simple, f'ing cave man simple:
1. Post Roll EVERDAY
2. DO IT EARLY, FIRST THING IN YOUR DAY, preferably before you have your morning coffee, bm, or whatever.
3. HONOR YOUR PROMISE
So much of the drama comes from people wanting to modify those 3 little steps. Then they get their panties in a bunch when someone calls them on it. Why do we have to argue about those steps? If someone cannot do those three little things they don't belong here. So the next time someone says they are going to leave the site because someone called them on this bs, please don't try to come to their rescue. Make them invest something in their own quit. If they won't, bid them good luck, godspeed and adios!
[golf clapping]
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Day 159 and feel like ranting.....
'blowup'
Why is this so hard for some people? It's pretty simple, really simple, f'ing cave man simple:
1. Post Roll EVERDAY
2. DO IT EARLY, FIRST THING IN YOUR DAY, preferably before you have your morning coffee, bm, or whatever.
3. HONOR YOUR PROMISE
So much of the drama comes from people wanting to modify those 3 little steps. Then they get their panties in a bunch when someone calls them on it. Why do we have to argue about those steps? If someone cannot do those three little things they don't belong here. So the next time someone says they are going to leave the site because someone called them on this bs, please don't try to come to their rescue. Make them invest something in their own quit. If they won't, bid them good luck, godspeed and adios!
Honor means something to me as well.
-
Day 159 and feel like ranting.....
'blowup'
Why is this so hard for some people? It's pretty simple, really simple, f'ing cave man simple:
1. Post Roll EVERDAY
2. DO IT EARLY, FIRST THING IN YOUR DAY, preferably before you have your morning coffee, bm, or whatever.
3. HONOR YOUR PROMISE
So much of the drama comes from people wanting to modify those 3 little steps. Then they get their panties in a bunch when someone calls them on it. Why do we have to argue about those steps? If someone cannot do those three little things they don't belong here. So the next time someone says they are going to leave the site because someone called them on this bs, please don't try to come to their rescue. Make them invest something in their own quit. If they won't, bid them good luck, godspeed and adios!
Protect your quit at all costs.
Cheers 30
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Thanks for that...
It really is that simple!!!
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Day 161
Every day posting like clockwork, just part of my routine...it just hit me- I posted 161 days this morning...ONE HUNDRED SIXTY ONE FREAKIN DAYS! 161 days of freedom, 161 days of not filling my mouth with carcinogens, 161 days of not sneaking away from my family, 161 days of not being a prisoner. When I look back at that 161 days I realize how much my quit has made life more enjoyable. Next month, I will be going on a camping trip that we as a family do with a group of our closest friends. I have been doing this trip since 2002. This will be the first year I won't be sneaking away to dip in secret. I won't be making excuses as to why I am staying behind at the campsite while my friends and family go and do things..I have never looked so forward to this trip!
When I think about the benefits of quitting, the thing that leaps out at me as the greatest thing I got from my quit is freedom. I have dipped from the time I was 12 or so. Freedom is something I have never had my entire adult life. 161 days later I know what freedom is, and it is not something I am willing to live without. I fought hard for my freedom, I am not giving it up!
I am Quit for today, no excuse accepted nor given. These days that's the way I roll.
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Day 161
Every day posting like clockwork, just part of my routine...it just hit me- I posted 161 days this morning...ONE HUNDRED SIXTY ONE FREAKIN DAYS! 161 days of freedom, 161 days of not filling my mouth with carcinogens, 161 days of not sneaking away from my family, 161 days of not being a prisoner. When I look back at that 161 days I realize how much my quit has made life more enjoyable. Next month, I will be going on a camping trip that we as a family do with a group of our closest friends. I have been doing this trip since 2002. This will be the first year I won't be sneaking away to dip in secret. I won't be making excuses as to why I am staying behind at the campsite while my friends and family go and do things..I have never looked so forward to this trip!
When I think about the benefits of quitting, the thing that leaps out at me as the greatest thing I got from my quit is freedom. I have dipped from the time I was 12 or so. Freedom is something I have never had my entire adult life. 161 days later I know what freedom is, and it is not something I am willing to live without. I fought hard for my freedom, I am not giving it up!
I am Quit for today, no excuse accepted nor given. These days that's the way I roll.
'clap'
Have fun on your 'sos4' trip!
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Day 161
Every day posting like clockwork, just part of my routine...it just hit me- I posted 161 days this morning...ONE HUNDRED SIXTY ONE FREAKIN DAYS! 161 days of freedom, 161 days of not filling my mouth with carcinogens, 161 days of not sneaking away from my family, 161 days of not being a prisoner. When I look back at that 161 days I realize how much my quit has made life more enjoyable. Next month, I will be going on a camping trip that we as a family do with a group of our closest friends. I have been doing this trip since 2002. This will be the first year I won't be sneaking away to dip in secret. I won't be making excuses as to why I am staying behind at the campsite while my friends and family go and do things..I have never looked so forward to this trip!
When I think about the benefits of quitting, the thing that leaps out at me as the greatest thing I got from my quit is freedom. I have dipped from the time I was 12 or so. Freedom is something I have never had my entire adult life. 161 days later I know what freedom is, and it is not something I am willing to live without. I fought hard for my freedom, I am not giving it up!
I am Quit for today, no excuse accepted nor given. These days that's the way I roll.
'clap'
Have fun on your 'sos4' trip!
Bravo 30! Now you'll only have to sneak away to rub one out.
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Bravo 30! Now you'll only have to sneak away to rub one out.
bad doggie (http://www.signsfunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/Bad-doggie.jpg)
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Day 159 and feel like ranting.....
'blowup'
Why is this so hard for some people? It's pretty simple, really simple, f'ing cave man simple:
1. Post Roll EVERDAY
2. DO IT EARLY, FIRST THING IN YOUR DAY, preferably before you have your morning coffee, bm, or whatever.Â
3. HONOR YOUR PROMISE
So much of the drama comes from people wanting to modify those 3 little steps. Then they get their panties in a bunch when someone calls them on it. Why do we have to argue about those steps? If someone cannot do those three little things they don't belong here. So the next time someone says they are going to leave the site because someone called them on this bs, please don't try to come to their rescue. Make them invest something in their own quit. If they won't, bid them good luck, godspeed and adios!
Honor means something to me as well.
Dip rage 30?
Though I am not the poster-boy for early posting any more...well, never really was I agree with you that this is the simplest set of "instructions" I have ever seen.
A box of mac and cheese has more steps to cooking it than quitting the nic bitch.
In fact I would say that there are FAR more steps to putting a dip in than there are with the wonderful KTC program.
Get with it people.
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Day 161
Every day posting like clockwork, just part of my routine...it just hit me- I posted 161 days this morning...ONE HUNDRED SIXTY ONE FREAKIN DAYS! 161 days of freedom, 161 days of not filling my mouth with carcinogens, 161 days of not sneaking away from my family, 161 days of not being a prisoner. When I look back at that 161 days I realize how much my quit has made life more enjoyable. Next month, I will be going on a camping trip that we as a family do with a group of our closest friends. I have been doing this trip since 2002. This will be the first year I won't be sneaking away to dip in secret. I won't be making excuses as to why I am staying behind at the campsite while my friends and family go and do things..I have never looked so forward to this trip!
When I think about the benefits of quitting, the thing that leaps out at me as the greatest thing I got from my quit is freedom. I have dipped from the time I was 12 or so. Freedom is something I have never had my entire adult life. 161 days later I know what freedom is, and it is not something I am willing to live without. I fought hard for my freedom, I am not giving it up!
I am Quit for today, no excuse accepted nor given. These days that's the way I roll.
WOW man!
This gives me so much hope and inspiration...
I have a motorcycle trip coming up in August, and this will be the first time I go to something where I'm not dipping or smoking. I'm so looking forward to this as I'll finally be able to enjoy myself and not worry about dipping or running out and so on. I'm just going to go and have a good time.
Enjoy your camping trip!
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I read amgdenny's intro over on whack the pack and it struck a chord with me as my mother also died from emphysema caused by smoking. She was 54 years old.
Long before the public knew the dangers of smoking, my mother's addiction began...perhaps in her early teens. She struggled and survived a horrific childhood at the hand of an alcoholic father...became a mother of 4 boys, of which I am the youngest. Did all she could to make sure that we had it better than she did. Throughout the years she watched what she ate, exercised, spent a great deal of time outdoors, but smoking was something that she just couldn't give up, Lord knows she tried many times...all the while big tobacco was studying their market, manipulating nicotine levels, covering up damaging evidence of health risks, making inroads with Hollywood, targeting young people. Accountants figuring profit margins, attorneys doing damage control, and the machine continued on ...
What did that mean for my mother....It meant a slow death...as breathing became less and less efficient, her blood oxygen levels fell. Organs began to become oxygen starved, and began to slowly fail... All the while, the nicotine doing it's job...keeping my mother using cigarettes up to the point where she was no longer physically able. step 1. use oxygen, step 2 remove oxygen. step 3 smoke step 4 stop when coughing too much to smoke. 5 goto step 1. She died after 4 years of daily suffering- a mother to me. A statistic to be added to a tally for big tobacco. They lost a customer, one of hundreds of thousands...mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters. And still they meet in board rooms, studying how to introduce more to the horror of nicotine addiction. The wake they leave behind is a trail of dead bodies, oxygen machines, cancer drugs, misery, disfiguring surgeries, amputated limbs. It is a despicable business.
As I left the hospital the day my mother died, I swore in the memory of my mother I would never support big tobacco with my business again. But already the nicotine withdrawal had begun...big tobacco tugging my strings as a marionette. I was their puppet for 15 more years. I daily thought about that promise to stop supporting big tobacco.
162 days ago I did something about that promise. The death of my mother was not enough to strengthen my resolve enough to stop using. I didn't stop using until I came here. This program of accountability across cyberspace works. And it works as written. To change it is to weaken it. Drink the kool aid.
Thanks to all that keep this site going. I am finally able to keep my last promise to my mom, may she be dancing on the streets of heaven.
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I have no idea who any of you guys are - and yet I have SO much respect for all of you. You give me something to look forward to as I keep racking up the days.
Take Care
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I read amgdenny's intro over on whack the pack and it struck a chord with me as my mother also died from emphysema caused by smoking. She was 54 years old.
Long before the public knew the dangers of smoking, my mother's addiction began...perhaps in her early teens. She struggled and survived a horrific childhood at the hand of an alcoholic father...became a mother of 4 boys, of which I am the youngest. Did all she could to make sure that we had it better than she did. Throughout the years she watched what she ate, exercised, spent a great deal of time outdoors, but smoking was something that she just couldn't give up, Lord knows she tried many times...all the while big tobacco was studying their market, manipulating nicotine levels, covering up damaging evidence of health risks, making inroads with Hollywood, targeting young people. Accountants figuring profit margins, attorneys doing damage control, and the machine continued on ...
What did that mean for my mother....It meant a slow death...as breathing became less and less efficient, her blood oxygen levels fell. Organs began to become oxygen starved, and began to slowly fail... All the while, the nicotine doing it's job...keeping my mother using cigarettes up to the point where she was no longer physically able. step 1. use oxygen, step 2 remove oxygen. step 3 smoke step 4 stop when coughing too much to smoke. 5 goto step 1. She died after 4 years of daily suffering- a mother to me. A statistic to be added to a tally for big tobacco. They lost a customer, one of hundreds of thousands...mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters. And still they meet in board rooms, studying how to introduce more to the horror of nicotine addiction. The wake they leave behind is a trail of dead bodies, oxygen machines, cancer drugs, misery, disfiguring surgeries, amputated limbs. It is a despicable business.
As I left the hospital the day my mother died, I swore in the memory of my mother I would never support big tobacco with my business again. But already the nicotine withdrawal had begun...big tobacco tugging my strings as a marionette. I was their puppet for 15 more years. I daily thought about that promise to stop supporting big tobacco.
162 days ago I did something about that promise. The death of my mother was not enough to strengthen my resolve enough to stop using. I didn't stop using until I came here. This program of accountability across cyberspace works. And it works as written. To change it is to weaken it. Drink the kool aid.
Thanks to all that keep this site going. I am finally able to keep my last promise to my mom, may she be dancing on the streets of heaven.
May she be, indeed. Thanks for posting this.
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Your mother would be so dang proud that you are saving people from experiencing the pain she did.
Glad you are here 30.
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I read amgdenny's intro over on whack the pack and it struck a chord with me as my mother also died from emphysema caused by smoking. She was 54 years old.
Long before the public knew the dangers of smoking, my mother's addiction began...perhaps in her early teens. She struggled and survived a horrific childhood at the hand of an alcoholic father...became a mother of 4 boys, of which I am the youngest. Did all she could to make sure that we had it better than she did. Throughout the years she watched what she ate, exercised, spent a great deal of time outdoors, but smoking was something that she just couldn't give up, Lord knows she tried many times...all the while big tobacco was studying their market, manipulating nicotine levels, covering up damaging evidence of health risks, making inroads with Hollywood, targeting young people. Accountants figuring profit margins, attorneys doing damage control, and the machine continued on ...
What did that mean for my mother....It meant a slow death...as breathing became less and less efficient, her blood oxygen levels fell. Organs began to become oxygen starved, and began to slowly fail... All the while, the nicotine doing it's job...keeping my mother using cigarettes up to the point where she was no longer physically able. step 1. use oxygen, step 2 remove oxygen. step 3 smoke step 4 stop when coughing too much to smoke. 5 goto step 1. She died after 4 years of daily suffering- a mother to me. A statistic to be added to a tally for big tobacco. They lost a customer, one of hundreds of thousands...mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters. And still they meet in board rooms, studying how to introduce more to the horror of nicotine addiction. The wake they leave behind is a trail of dead bodies, oxygen machines, cancer drugs, misery, disfiguring surgeries, amputated limbs. It is a despicable business.
As I left the hospital the day my mother died, I swore in the memory of my mother I would never support big tobacco with my business again. But already the nicotine withdrawal had begun...big tobacco tugging my strings as a marionette. I was their puppet for 15 more years. I daily thought about that promise to stop supporting big tobacco.
162 days ago I did something about that promise. The death of my mother was not enough to strengthen my resolve enough to stop using. I didn't stop using until I came here. This program of accountability across cyberspace works. And it works as written. To change it is to weaken it. Drink the kool aid.Â
Thanks to all that keep this site going. I am finally able to keep my last promise to my mom, may she be dancing on the streets of heaven.
May she be, indeed. Thanks for posting this.
Same here 30. My mom died two years ago at 62. Lung cancer from smoking. Quit finally at age 55 but made no difference. She waited to long. Died 7 years later. Not from the cancer, quit eating and drinking because the pain was too bad. Still took me two years after that to quit. Peace 30. I am quit with u. Dave
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Links to use:
Here's one possible destiny. (http://www.outdoortexan.com/warning.htm)
Can you imagine how a simple task like going to a C-store would change with this fate. (http://whyquit.com/whyquit/A_Gruen.html)
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I read amgdenny's intro over on whack the pack and it struck a chord with me as my mother also died from emphysema caused by smoking. She was 54 years old.
Long before the public knew the dangers of smoking, my mother's addiction began...perhaps in her early teens.  She struggled and survived a horrific childhood at the hand of an alcoholic father...became a mother of 4 boys, of which I am the youngest. Did all she could to make sure that we had it better than she did. Throughout the years she watched what she ate, exercised, spent a great deal of time outdoors, but smoking was something that she just couldn't give up, Lord knows she tried many times...all the while big tobacco was studying their market, manipulating nicotine levels, covering up damaging evidence of health risks, making inroads with Hollywood, targeting young people. Accountants figuring profit margins, attorneys doing damage control, and the machine continued on ...
What did that mean for my mother....It meant a slow death...as breathing became less and less efficient, her blood oxygen levels fell. Organs began to become oxygen starved, and began to slowly fail... All the while, the nicotine doing it's job...keeping my mother using cigarettes up to the point where she was no longer physically able. step 1. use oxygen, step 2 remove oxygen. step 3 smoke step 4 stop when coughing too much to smoke. 5 goto step 1. She died after 4 years of daily suffering- a mother to me. A statistic to be added to a tally for big tobacco. They lost a customer, one of hundreds of thousands...mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters. And still they meet in board rooms, studying how to introduce more to the horror of nicotine addiction. The wake they leave behind is a trail of dead bodies, oxygen machines, cancer drugs, misery, disfiguring surgeries, amputated limbs. It is a despicable business.
As I left the hospital the day my mother died, I swore in the memory of my mother I would never support big tobacco with my business again. But already the nicotine withdrawal had begun...big tobacco tugging my strings as a marionette. I was their puppet for 15 more years. I daily thought about that promise to stop supporting big tobacco.
162 days ago I did something about that promise. The death of my mother was not enough to strengthen my resolve enough to stop using. I didn't stop using until I came here. This program of accountability across cyberspace works. And it works as written. To change it is to weaken it. Drink the kool aid.Â
Thanks to all that keep this site going. I am finally able to keep my last promise to my mom, may she be dancing on the streets of heaven.
May she be, indeed. Thanks for posting this.
Same here 30. My mom died two years ago at 62. Lung cancer from smoking. Quit finally at age 55 but made no difference. She waited to long. Died 7 years later. Not from the cancer, quit eating and drinking because the pain was too bad. Still took me two years after that to quit. Peace 30. I am quit with u. Dave
Tobacco has taken enough from me. They don't have my permission anymore. I quit with you Dave, may your mother and mine be dancing on the streets of heaven.
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We already knew this, but here's further evidence, 30:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/ ... onely.html (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2017543/Britons-deprived-internet-feel-upset-lonely.html)
Sure would be nice to get some support around here, but don't dare bring it up. 'finger point'
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We already knew this, but here's further evidence, 30:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/ ... onely.html (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2017543/Britons-deprived-internet-feel-upset-lonely.html)
Sure would be nice to get some support around here, but don't dare bring it up. 'finger point'
Maybe someone should PM Loot and/or Remshot and ask about getting a forum "just in case" :unsure:
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We already knew this, but here's further evidence, 30:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/ ... onely.html (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2017543/Britons-deprived-internet-feel-upset-lonely.html)
Sure would be nice to get some support around here, but don't dare bring it up. 'finger point'
Maybe someone should PM Loot and/or Remshot and ask about getting a forum "just in case" :unsure:
I nominate Rebeldog.
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We already knew this, but here's further evidence, 30:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/ ... onely.html (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2017543/Britons-deprived-internet-feel-upset-lonely.html)
Sure would be nice to get some support around here, but don't dare bring it up.  'finger point'
Maybe someone should PM Loot and/or Remshot and ask about getting a forum "just in case" :unsure:
I nominate Rebeldog.
I refuse to contribute to this, as threads I am involved in get mysteriously "locked". Be kind of awkward to get locked out of your own intro, don't you think?
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We already knew this, but here's further evidence, 30:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/ ... onely.html (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2017543/Britons-deprived-internet-feel-upset-lonely.html)
Sure would be nice to get some support around here, but don't dare bring it up.  'finger point'
Maybe someone should PM Loot and/or Remshot and ask about getting a forum "just in case" :unsure:
I nominate Rebeldog.
I refuse to contribute to this, as threads I am involved in get mysteriously "locked". Be kind of awkward to get locked out of your own intro, don't you think?
Loot gets it in a closet homo burly junior high gym teacher kind of way. Overly gruff on the surface but pudgy mashmallowy gooey at the core.
Remshot on the other hand comes barreling in a few days to a week late to every instance without taking time to appreciate the situation or realize it's all in good nature only to overreact, act totally hasty and act like a dick. Remshot is officially our Coach Balbricker (http://images.huffingtonpost.com/2010-09-24-Ballbreaker.jpg).
Sorry to hijack your intro 30.
Somebody second that nomination.
'Popcorn'
-
I read amgdenny's intro over on whack the pack and it struck a chord with me as my mother also died from emphysema caused by smoking. She was 54 years old.
Long before the public knew the dangers of smoking, my mother's addiction began...perhaps in her early teens.  She struggled and survived a horrific childhood at the hand of an alcoholic father...became a mother of 4 boys, of which I am the youngest. Did all she could to make sure that we had it better than she did. Throughout the years she watched what she ate, exercised, spent a great deal of time outdoors, but smoking was something that she just couldn't give up, Lord knows she tried many times...all the while big tobacco was studying their market, manipulating nicotine levels, covering up damaging evidence of health risks, making inroads with Hollywood, targeting young people. Accountants figuring profit margins, attorneys doing damage control, and the machine continued on ...
What did that mean for my mother....It meant a slow death...as breathing became less and less efficient, her blood oxygen levels fell. Organs began to become oxygen starved, and began to slowly fail... All the while, the nicotine doing it's job...keeping my mother using cigarettes up to the point where she was no longer physically able. step 1. use oxygen, step 2 remove oxygen. step 3 smoke step 4 stop when coughing too much to smoke. 5 goto step 1. She died after 4 years of daily suffering- a mother to me. A statistic to be added to a tally for big tobacco. They lost a customer, one of hundreds of thousands...mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters. And still they meet in board rooms, studying how to introduce more to the horror of nicotine addiction. The wake they leave behind is a trail of dead bodies, oxygen machines, cancer drugs, misery, disfiguring surgeries, amputated limbs. It is a despicable business.
As I left the hospital the day my mother died, I swore in the memory of my mother I would never support big tobacco with my business again. But already the nicotine withdrawal had begun...big tobacco tugging my strings as a marionette. I was their puppet for 15 more years. I daily thought about that promise to stop supporting big tobacco.
162 days ago I did something about that promise. The death of my mother was not enough to strengthen my resolve enough to stop using. I didn't stop using until I came here. This program of accountability across cyberspace works. And it works as written. To change it is to weaken it. Drink the kool aid.Â
Thanks to all that keep this site going. I am finally able to keep my last promise to my mom, may she be dancing on the streets of heaven.
May she be, indeed. Thanks for posting this.
Same here 30. My mom died two years ago at 62. Lung cancer from smoking. Quit finally at age 55 but made no difference. She waited to long. Died 7 years later. Not from the cancer, quit eating and drinking because the pain was too bad. Still took me two years after that to quit. Peace 30. I am quit with u. Dave
Tobacco has taken enough from me. They don't have my permission anymore. I quit with you Dave, may your mother and mine be dancing on the streets of heaven.
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Day 216
Haven't had any time to be on this board the last 2 months due to a huge amount of forced overtime at work. During this time I went through a major funk, and I was not able to use my numbers, or spend time on this site, many days I was only able to post roll in May 2011. However, just knowing that at a critical point I could call, text or reach out to several quitters and knowing there were people here to hold me accountable kept my quit going strong, even when I was not able to be as committed here as I would have liked.
Tomorrow is going to be a continuation of the forced overtime...but, even though you don't see me here as much, I still am quit, and I still support each and every one of you. You can be sure that I will be back here as soon as life returns to "normal". For those of you that are new to the site: Welcome! I look forward to quitting with you. For my old friends- thanks for being there for me.
TeamK, Xzacto, and BrotherOfNoMoSko- keep up the good work- sorry I haven't been here to support.(Now yall are part of my intro- no pressure!)
Thanks to all of you, especially those that post up support of me everyday and text me encouragement...It means more to me than you know.
Proud to be quit with all of you,
Dale
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30,
Great to here from you. I can't wait until you are able to get more involved again--your Quit is super-strong and has helped me a lot!
Thanks--Hang tough!
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Day 265
Strength from the Ashes
The past couple of days have been tough for May 2011 as we recover from the cave of an everyday poster...not just any everyday poster, but one who was arguably one of the most popular in our quit group...Hootie. 282 days, and then a premeditated cave. He said that he was forced to give up everything that made him happy...dip being one of them...Rookie mistake...romanticizing dip...you wouldn't think that a quitter with 282 days under his belt would fall for that..unfortunately that is the nature of addiction: our addict brain will tell us anything to get what it wants: nicotine. It is a sad thing, Hootie's cave, but the only thing we can do with it is learn from it and move on.
When I take a forensic look at Hootie's cave, and look back over the texts, the one thing that leaps out at me is that he tolerated addict thinking...he allowed himself to romanticize dip...he allowed himself to be convinced that returning to dip would be a comfort to him as he faced some of life's inevitable stresses....I have no doubt that he will realize the folly of this thinking very soon, if he doesn't already.
There is no doubt that Hootie's cave rattled a few of us back in May, but as that shock wears off, I am seeing a stronger group emerge. We are more focused, and more vigilant. I have no doubt that this group has what it takes to stay quit. But the one thing we must learn from this is to attack the lies of addiction, to not tolerate even the fleeting thought that dipping was ever good...we need to go back to our day 1's and remember what brought us here. We need to remember spitters, our fear of cancer, the time stolen from family and friends, the flashburns and receding gums, the looks of disgust we got from our significant others, the fear or embarrassment when we went to the doctor or dentist, all the times we nearly puked the dip out into the spitter, we need to remember those times...because if we don't, if we let our addict brains fill in the blanks.................I am not going down like that.
My name is Dale and I am an addict
but I am no longer defined by my addiction
because I am stronger than my addiction
265 days and counting
-
Am I going to see you in PA next weekend?
-
I didn't know Hootie well but did look at his photo album and spoke with him briefly once about that. He did seen like an active member here so it was quite shocking to hear of his cave. I, too, hope to learn something from this as his quit group is also trying to make sense of it. Almost 300 days and tossing it all aside and knowing that as soon as he put that first dip in he felt like shit. But it was too late. He was hooked again. Just a very clear reminder of how vulnerable we really are to this addiction if we get complacent for only a moment. Scary.
-
Am I going to see you in PA next weekend?
I am pretty sure you will...probably be there Saturday 11am and stay for a few hours.
-
30's quit resources
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Is Posting Roll enough? [in progress]
So you've got a handle on how the site works, right? Post roll, honor that promise, repeat...is that all it takes? Technically, yes that is all it takes- if you do those three things every day without fail, you will quit for the rest of your life one today at a time- except -it doesn't seem to play out that way for many folks....That program is the foundation, the cornerstone of the program here. It is the bare minimum. That's the problem right there- people who do the bare minimum for their quit tend not to stick with it over the long haul. I can tell these people right away- they are the ones that you almost never see here as they are only here long enough to post roll. Those are the folks that you have to PM and/or use multiple posts to get their attention, because they don't even take the time to scroll down to find out what happened to their quit brothers/sisters throughout the day....hell they don't even look over the roll they are posting in to see what others are going through. I am pretty convinced I could change the header to "December Druids in favor of clubbing baby seals to death" and they would come in, hit the quote button post their roll and leave... These people contribute nothing to the site- they are just a name followed by a number. Just as they were on the site they tend to just fade away into oblivion...and when they are gone, nobody really notices...sometimes they come back and post a day 1...usually it doesn't matter though. Because they usually just do the same thing all over again....post roll, leave the site quickly, fade away....
Then there are those that "get it". Those that understand the more they have invested in their quit, the better. Those that post roll every day and then build on it with developing accountability by exchanging numbers, reading the treasure chest of knowledge that is found throughout the site, by stepping up an helping other quitters- those are the people who stay quit.
Is your quit worth more than the bare minimum? If it's not- I predict a cave in your future. Post Roll, Honor Your Promise, Repeat. Exchange Numbers, Read, Take the time to help quitters new and old. Invest in your quit.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30's word to those that think they know more than the vets......
Imagine that you are standing in front of a minefield...on the other side of that minefield stands a soldier...not only has he walked that minefield safely, but he has guided thousands of others through that minefield safely as well.. He hails you from the other side and offers to guide you across safely...
do you:
a) tell him he is well meaning but really doesn't know shit about minefields
or
b.) shut up and listen to what he has to say, treading the path of thousands of others before you.
one way guarantees you safe passage, Why tread a new path?
drink the kool aid...drink long. drink deep.
Don't be a casualty.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
330 the Roll Nazi:
You might be wondering why the emphasis on posting first thing in your day? Remember that your roll post is a promise not to use nicotine for just one day.....also know that your addict mind is always trying to get a fix of nicotine. Your addict mind is an expert on rationalization....For example : "I didn't post roll yet, so I'm really not breaking a promise by having just one....I can just quit tomorrow again..." Shut the door on your addict mind- post up first thing.
The other aspect of posting roll early and every day is that it is an investment in your accountability...if I post whenever you feel like it, nobody is going to pay attention when I am missing, whereas if I post every morning, it is going to raise a warning when folks don't see my post by the afternoon. I want my inbox blown up by dinnertime if I don't post...don't you?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So what happened to Olivahpowah you might ask? While we can't be sure that he caved, it is possible that he just didn't want this bad enough. For those of you who are left: How bad do you want to quit? Because your success is predicted with perfect accuracy from the true answer to that question. If it's a strong "want" in your life- you will fail. It may not be today, it may not be next week, you may make it to your HOF day and beyond, but eventually you will cave. For those of you in this category- no advice you receive is going to be effective over the long term until you decide to shut the door on nicotine. Go look at the cancer pics, do some research on what big tobacco has done over the years to keep you as their Marionette....read about Tom and Jenny Kern. go over to whyquit.com and read some of the stories there. Do whatever it takes to get you to the point of closing the door on nicotine. While we can give advice on how to quit, we cannot close the door for you. That, dear reader, is up to you.
If you are truly sick of this stupid addiction, really sick of being the lackey of big tobacco, sick of worrying about cancer, sick of hiding your addiction from others, and you want this quit more than anything else..and you drink the KTC kool aid - you will succeed- guaranteed. The program is foolproof:
Post Roll
Honor your promise for today
Repeat
One last thing: Quitters find a way to quit. Caver's find a way to cave.
Be a quitter.
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
M Mule21's first post (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2420)
Tomorrow never comes (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2423)
11X4's Epiphany (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2430)
Loot on brotherhood (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2431)
MChewie on Cavers (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2433)
MTwo Wolves (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2453)
Tools by WildBill (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2463)
Nicotine over Legs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2478)
Skoal Monster's letter to UST (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2592)
M What I know- by Skoal Monster (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2672)
An open letter to non-regular posters (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2691)
Rick bender (http://www.journal-news.com/news/ohio-news/jawless-man-shares-dangers-of-tobacco-605250.html)
How bad do you want to quit? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5420)
Tough Love (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5401)
quitter vs stopper (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5350)
Mundeniable truth (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4938)
Why not just one (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4814)
Every day I post roll (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4689)
silly rabbits (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4566)
pickles vs cucumbers (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4512)
A welcome to the newbs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4402)
Nicotine over legs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4240)
There is no "just one" (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4172)
What's the hardest thing you can do (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4130)
What are you willing to do to stay quit? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4037)
Who does big tobacco think you are? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3919)
What you need to hear (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3861)
M A quit plan (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3846)
The caver (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3712)
I take them out all the time (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3516)
Mskoal monster's intro (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showuser=6412)
the decision to quit- by chewie (http://www.killthecan.org/facts/chewie01.asp)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
Day 270
Keepin it real....
I haven't used the fake in 12 days...I can tell you that the craves are definitely way more frequent. As a matter of a fact, when I was using the fake I had virtually no craves...now they are a daily and frequent occurrence...Annoying as hell, but manageable...At this point I am once again doing the unimaginable- living a life with nothing stuck in my lip...feels really strange- like I'm no longer me. After these craves go away, I know I am going to enjoy not having a dip of anything in my lip....as far as no longer being me...I could use a little improvement anyhow...
-
Day 274
On my way to BigBrotherJack's yesterday...First long-ish trip with no dip in my lip...fake or otherwise...on the way there I thought about what I was going to tell my children about my struggle with nicotine....This morning I talked to my son(17) and daughter(14) both knew that I chewed- as I suspected...but both thought I had stopped a long time ago..I am 99% sure that my son has never and will never try tobacco....but I hope that what I told him will stick with him just in case. My daughter- well I am not sure if she has experimented with cigarettes. She was pretty quiet when I told her....I just hope that if she has tried cigarettes, my words will resonate with her and she will turn her back on them...
I pray that my children will never know the hell of nicotine addiction...
and I pray that their generation has the wisdom and compassion to ban its use...
because my generation has failed at that.
-
Day 288
Logging the journey...
It is surprising how little it takes to reawaken the psychological addiction. I quit using the fake several weeks ago now, and I picked up some seeds, just in case...I got through the craves of quitting the fake without the seeds, so about a week ago I figured why waste the seeds? Over the course of the week I ate both bags that I bought...wouldn't you know it brought back the craves...finished the seeds a couple of days ago and have been craving ever since....pathetically weak craves, but craves nonetheless. I actually have come to like those little craves- I love laughing at my addict mind...as charlie sheen says "WINNING!"...ok Charlie Sheen prolly isn't the poster child for freedom from addiction, but you get my drift.....
To those of you that are new- I have battled thousands of craves since I quit. The longer I stay quit the more pathetically weak they get. Most days, the nic-bitch doesn't even try...... Stay quit my friends
Keepin it real...
-
Channeling Charlie one day at a time...
-
Day 288
Logging the journey...
It is surprising how little it takes to reawaken the psychological addiction. I quit using the fake several weeks ago now, and I picked up some seeds, just in case...I got through the craves of quitting the fake without the seeds, so about a week ago I figured why waste the seeds? Over the course of the week I ate both bags that I bought...wouldn't you know it brought back the craves...finished the seeds a couple of days ago and have been craving ever since....pathetically weak craves, but craves nonetheless. I actually have come to like those little craves- I love laughing at my addict mind...as charlie sheen says "WINNING!"...ok Charlie Sheen prolly isn't the poster child for freedom from addiction, but you get my drift.....
To those of you that are new- I have battled thousands of craves since I quit. The longer I stay quit the more pathetically weak they get. Most days, the nic-bitch doesn't even try...... Stay quit my friends
Keepin it real...
Hey 30,
I know we had a few texts about this before and I hope you remember me saying that the best part of the quit is when you are finally free from every crutch. I wanted to advise against the seeds but you are a bad ass quitter and I knew you could handle yourself in any situation.
The real reason I am posting is to let you know that I sincerely think that your best days yet will be about 3 weeks from when you lay down any oral fixation like gum, seeds, or fake.
Keep it up, 300 is just around the corner.
-
30's quit resources
A Word to the Retreads
I wanted to wait until all of the drama died down to have a word with you....
So you are back...and posting roll...Doing the things I would expect to see from someone who is serious about their quit...In addition to posting roll, I sure hope you are living, breathing, drinking the kool aid here.
You can believe 2 things about this place: It's nothing more than a tool to help you quit and the people here are just strangers in cyberspace........ or this is a place full of dead serious quitters intent on saving their own life and helping others save theirs.
In the short time I have been here, I have actually met several quitters, talked to some more on the phone, texted still others, and keep in contact with others through facebook, pm, and email. I have moved the KTC experience far beyond some self help website in cyberspace. I have no place to hide...In order to get away from these folks I would have to change my home number, email address, cell number, move (yes some of them know where I live), abandon my facebook account, and ask my kids and wife to abandon theirs.
In other words- this is my last quit- and I am all in. I have built my accountability to the point that there is no going back...no hedged bets, no retreat clause, no surrender.
My question for you is: Have you decided this is your last quit? Then box yourself in...build your accountability to the point there is no escape. Take every opportunity to be held accountable to other quitters. Stay in constant contact with people that will not tolerate addict thinking. In short put all your chips in the center of the table...go all in.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Is Posting Roll Enough?
So you've got a handle on how the site works, right? Post roll, honor that promise, repeat...is that all it takes? Technically, yes that is all it takes- if you do those three things every day without fail, you will quit for the rest of your life one today at a time- except -it doesn't seem to play out that way for many folks....That program is the foundation, the cornerstone of the program here. It is the bare minimum. That's the problem right there- people who do the bare minimum for their quit tend not to stick with it over the long haul. I can tell these people right away- they are the ones that you almost never see here as they are only here long enough to post roll. Those are the folks that you have to PM and/or use multiple posts to get their attention, because they don't even take the time to scroll down to find out what happened to their quit brothers/sisters throughout the day....hell they don't even look over the roll they are posting in to see what others are going through. I am pretty convinced I could change the header to "December Druids in Favor of Clubbing Baby Seals to Death" and they would come in, hit the quote button post their roll and leave... These people contribute nothing to the site- they are just a name followed by a number. Just as they were on the site they tend to just fade away into oblivion...and when they are gone, nobody really notices...sometimes they come back and post a day 1...usually it doesn't matter though. Because they usually just do the same thing all over again....post roll, leave the site quickly, fade away....
Then there are those that "get it". Those that understand the more they have invested in their quit, the better. Those that post roll every day and then build on it with developing accountability by exchanging numbers, reading the treasure chest of knowledge that is found throughout the site, by stepping up an helping other quitters- those are the people who stay quit.
Is your quit worth more than the bare minimum? If it's not- I predict a cave in your future. Post Roll, Honor Your Promise, Repeat. Exchange Numbers, Read, Take the time to help quitters new and old. Invest in your quit.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Word to Those That Know More than the Vets
Imagine that you are standing in front of a minefield...on the other side of that minefield stands a soldier...not only has he walked that minefield safely, but he has guided thousands of others through that minefield safely as well.. He hails you from the other side and offers to guide you across safely...
do you:
a) tell him he is well meaning but really doesn't know shit about minefields
or
b.) shut up and listen to what he has to say, treading the path of thousands of others before you.
one way guarantees you safe passage, Why tread a new path?
drink the kool aid...drink long. drink deep.
Don't be a casualty.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30 the Roll Nazi:
You might be wondering why the emphasis on posting first thing in your day? Remember that your roll post is a promise not to use nicotine for just one day.....also know that your addict mind is always trying to get a fix of nicotine. Your addict mind is an expert on rationalization....For example : "I didn't post roll yet, so I'm really not breaking a promise by having just one....I can just quit tomorrow again..." Shut the door on your addict mind- post up first thing.
The other aspect of posting roll early and every day is that it is an investment in your accountability...if I post whenever I feel like it, nobody is going to pay attention when I am missing, whereas if I post every morning, it is going to raise a warning when folks don't see my post by the afternoon. I want my inbox blown up by dinnertime if I don't post...don't you?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Want vs Decision
So what happened to those that disappeared to never be heard from again? While we can't be sure of a cave, it is possible that they just didn't want this bad enough. For those of you who are left: How bad do you want to quit? Because your success is predicted with perfect accuracy from the true answer to that question. Most of my 33 years dipping I strongly "wanted" to quit. If quitting's a strong "want" in your life- you will fail. It may not be today, it may not be next week, you may make it to your HOF day and beyond, but eventually you will cave. For those of you in this category- no advice you receive is going to be effective over the long term until you decide to shut the door on nicotine. Until you make the decision that you will pursue a lifestyle of quit. Go look at the cancer pics, do some research on what big tobacco has done over the years to keep you as their Marionette....read about Tom and Jenny Kern. go over to whyquit.com and read some of the stories there. Do whatever it takes to get you to the point of closing the door on nicotine. While we can give advice on how to quit, we cannot close the door for you. That, dear reader, is up to you.
If you are truly sick of this stupid addiction, really sick of being the lackey of big tobacco, sick of worrying about cancer, sick of hiding your addiction from others, and you want this quit more than anything else..and you drink the KTC kool aid - you will succeed- guaranteed. The program is foolproof:
Post Roll
Honor your promise for today
Repeat
One last thing: Quitters find a way to quit. Caver's find a way to cave.
Be a quitter.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
No Reservations Allowed
I was talking to a friend of mine about his AA meeting...he was telling me that there were several types of people there: ..the hard nosed in your face types who know that one drink will never be permissible, then there are the quieter ones, who also know that alcohol is off limits forever... the ones that are there because they are quitting for someone else: for their spouse, or for the judge...and then you will find some that are quit for today..but they are not really sure if they are an alcoholic...That is what is known as having a reservation...they are not really sure that they are quit for good...The first two types are the ones most likely to be successful in building a lifetime of sobriety one day at a time...The rest...well the failure rate is off the charts....
Do YOU have any reservations? Is there a circumstance that would push you over the edge? Is there a crave that would get too strong? Is there a limit to what you would do to protect your quit?
To quote one badass quitter:
No more- not for any reason!
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
M LooT's first post (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2420)
Tomorrow never comes (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2423)
11X4's Epiphany (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2430)
Loot on brotherhood (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2431)
MChewie on Cavers (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2433)
MTwo Wolves (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2453)
M Tools by WildBill (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2463)
Nicotine over Legs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2478)
Skoal Monster's letter to UST (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2592)
M What I know- by Skoal Monster (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2672)
An open letter to non-regular posters (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2691)
M Rick bender (http://www.journal-news.com/news/ohio-news/jawless-man-shares-dangers-of-tobacco-605250.html)
M How bad do you want to quit? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5420)
M Tough Love (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5401)
quitter vs stopper (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5350)
Mundeniable truth (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4938)
M Why not just one (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4814)
Every day I post roll (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4689)
M silly rabbits (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4566)
pickles vs cucumbers (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4512)
A welcome to the newbs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4402)
Nicotine over legs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4240)
There is no "just one" (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4172)
M What's the hardest thing you can do (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4130)
What are you willing to do to stay quit? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4037)
M Who does big tobacco think you are? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3919)
What you need to hear (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3861)
M A quit plan (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3846)
The caver (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3712)
I take them out all the time (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3516)
Mskoal monster's intro (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showuser=6412)
the decision to quit- by chewie (http://www.killthecan.org/facts/chewie01.asp)
M Tell your damn story (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5560)
M Gruen shares the cold, hard facts (http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=gruen+von+behrens+video&view=detail&mid=624CF722B83BCC19844A624CF722B83BCC19844A&first=0&FORM=LKVR2)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
Withdrawals do suck. I do best when I embrace the suck. When I realize it's my addict throwing a childish temper tantrum, I can smile....even chuckle at its lame efforts to stay alive. "Is that the best you got" is my favorite response.
But, I'm not always so strong. The addict bitch keep chewing at the heels. Sometimes I just want to rest. But I can't...it's like a war...the last person standing wins. I might get tired, but I can't lie down. You see, I believe my addict is also getting tired. Now is not the time to lie down, it's the time to remind my addict who is boss!
I take control back when I lose strength. I can take it back by reminding myself why I'm doing this. Reading and posting on KTC helps more than anything. Sometimes my rants (like this one) stem from winning another bitch of a battle, other times I just post when I'm having a hard time finding the energy to stay with it. Either I feel great and can share things that motivated me, or I'm struggling and I ask for help. Give help, ask for help. That's how I see it.
If I can't get to a computer, then I have 3 cell #'s to text. They're always there when I need them. I like doing the same for other quitters. You want a good quit buddy? Try me. PM or Email your number and I'll text back.
WE CAN DO THIS ONE DAY AT A TIME.
-
Withdrawals do suck. I do best when I embrace the suck. When I realize it's my addict throwing a childish temper tantrum, I can smile....even chuckle at its lame efforts to stay alive. "Is that the best you got" is my favorite response.
But, I'm not always so strong. The addict bitch keep chewing at the heels. Sometimes I just want to rest. But I can't...it's like a war...the last person standing wins. I might get tired, but I can't lie down. You see, I believe my addict is also getting tired. Now is not the time to lie down, it's the time to remind my addict who is boss!
I take control back when I lose strength. I can take it back by reminding myself why I'm doing this. Reading and posting on KTC helps more than anything. Sometimes my rants (like this one) stem from winning another bitch of a battle, other times I just post when I'm having a hard time finding the energy to stay with it. Either I feel great and can share things that motivated me, or I'm struggling and I ask for help. Give help, ask for help. That's how I see it.Â
If I can't get to a computer, then I have 3 cell #'s to text. They're always there when I need them. I like doing the same for other quitters. You want a good quit buddy? Try me. PM or Email your number and I'll text back.
WE CAN DO THIS ONE DAY AT A TIME.
Cornholio....stay on that path...it is the correct one. I quit with you today
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
-
30, you are in my prayers. I truly feel for you and your family. Stay strong.
-
I'm sorry 30, I STAY quit with you
-
Dale my deepest sympathies friend.
-
You and your family will be in our prayers...
-
Prayers for you and your family 30...
I can't possibly imagine how somber that makes this Christmas season.
Stay quit, this tobacco stuff is evil.
-
Thank you gentlemen. your support, well wishes, and prayers mean more to me than you know.
-
My thoughts and prayers as well------ I have lost several in my family to tobacco as well.
-
Deepest sympathies and prayers for your family...
-
LL, Ag.. Thanks for the prayers...means a whole lot to me.
-
Major prayers being sent your way, Dale.
My cousin, age 39, just died of a massive heart attack. He was a smoker and had high cholesterol. No chance to make it. He died while his friend tried to give him CPR.
There is no reason to go back ever again. Stay strong my friend. PM or text of you need anything.
-
Prayers to you and the family.
Your courage and willpower indeed have purpose. Glad you are here friend. Glad you are quit.
-
Dale,
I too will add you and your family to our prayer list.
-
I'm sorry 30. I keep you and your family in my prayers.
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
He is in a better place. Stay quit friend. Heart felt thoughts.
Nic,
You truly are evil.
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
He is in a better place. Stay quit friend. Heart felt thoughts.
Nic,
You truly are evil.
Prayers for grace for your bro and peace for you and your family.
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
He is in a better place. Stay quit friend. Heart felt thoughts.
Nic,
You truly are evil.
Prayers for grace for your bro and peace for you and your family.
Tragedy. Prayers for everyone this has affected.
Hang in their 30. The least we can do for your brother now is to spread the word about how bad this stuff is and keep saving lives on this site.
Quit with you today.
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
He is in a better place. Stay quit friend. Heart felt thoughts.
Nic,
You truly are evil.
Prayers for grace for your bro and peace for you and your family.
Tragedy. Prayers for everyone this has affected.
Hang in their 30. The least we can do for your brother now is to spread the word about how bad this stuff is and keep saving lives on this site.
Quit with you today.
I'm so very sorry...I have no words.
Stay strong, 30, and we quit with you.
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
He is in a better place. Stay quit friend. Heart felt thoughts.
Nic,
You truly are evil.
Prayers for grace for your bro and peace for you and your family.
Tragedy. Prayers for everyone this has affected.
Hang in their 30. The least we can do for your brother now is to spread the word about how bad this stuff is and keep saving lives on this site.
Quit with you today.
I'm so very sorry...I have no words.
Stay strong, 30, and we quit with you.
30, I honor your brother and you by quitting with you! My sincerest condolences to you and your family. My April brothers and I stand with you!
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
He is in a better place. Stay quit friend. Heart felt thoughts.
Nic,
You truly are evil.
Prayers for grace for your bro and peace for you and your family.
Tragedy. Prayers for everyone this has affected.
Hang in their 30. The least we can do for your brother now is to spread the word about how bad this stuff is and keep saving lives on this site.
Quit with you today.
I'm so very sorry...I have no words.
Stay strong, 30, and we quit with you.
30, I honor your brother and you by quitting with you! My sincerest condolences to you and your family. My April brothers and I stand with you!
Wow, Dale. I'm so sorry for your loss. Stay strong and stay quit...
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
He is in a better place. Stay quit friend. Heart felt thoughts.
Nic,
You truly are evil.
Prayers for grace for your bro and peace for you and your family.
Tragedy. Prayers for everyone this has affected.
Hang in their 30. The least we can do for your brother now is to spread the word about how bad this stuff is and keep saving lives on this site.
Quit with you today.
I'm so very sorry...I have no words.
Stay strong, 30, and we quit with you.
30, I honor your brother and you by quitting with you! My sincerest condolences to you and your family. My April brothers and I stand with you!
Wow, Dale. I'm so sorry for your loss. Stay strong and stay quit...
So sorry about this news.
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
Gold Bless 30. Prayers to you and yours.
X2
X3, i'm in on this crusade.
Prayers
I can't even put together words. My thoughts are with you.
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
He is in a better place. Stay quit friend. Heart felt thoughts.
Nic,
You truly are evil.
Prayers for grace for your bro and peace for you and your family.
Tragedy. Prayers for everyone this has affected.
Hang in their 30. The least we can do for your brother now is to spread the word about how bad this stuff is and keep saving lives on this site.
Quit with you today.
I'm so very sorry...I have no words.
Stay strong, 30, and we quit with you.
30, I honor your brother and you by quitting with you! My sincerest condolences to you and your family. My April brothers and I stand with you!
Wow, Dale. I'm so sorry for your loss. Stay strong and stay quit...
So sorry about this news.
A heartfelt thanks to all of you. I am truly touched by the outpouring of support. I would ask those you that are inclined toward prayer to add my father to your prayer lists. It is one of the hardest things for a father to be predeceased by his son. Thank you and God Bless You.
Dale
-
Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
He is in a better place. Stay quit friend. Heart felt thoughts.
Nic,
You truly are evil.
Prayers for grace for your bro and peace for you and your family.
Tragedy. Prayers for everyone this has affected.
Hang in their 30. The least we can do for your brother now is to spread the word about how bad this stuff is and keep saving lives on this site.
Quit with you today.
I'm so very sorry...I have no words.
Stay strong, 30, and we quit with you.
30, I honor your brother and you by quitting with you! My sincerest condolences to you and your family. My April brothers and I stand with you!
Wow, Dale. I'm so sorry for your loss. Stay strong and stay quit...
So sorry about this news.
A heartfelt thanks to all of you. I am truly touched by the outpouring of support. I would ask those you that are inclined toward prayer to add my father to your prayer lists. It is one of the hardest things for a father to be predeceased by his son. Thank you and God Bless You.
Dale
Dale I'm so sorry man. This is not in vain - so many of us will quit today in honor of you and your family. You are a good man and everyone is here for you during the tough time. Stay close 3
-
30 (or Dale it appears your real name is,)
Firtst and foremost you are a freaking stud of quit. I know this because there is no place on this expansive site i have posted or chatted where you have not stepped foot. If Steve Miller is the gangster of love, you are the gangster of quit and I mean that.
I am so sorry for your loss. I know you will be ok because already you are telling people to not worry about you, but pray for your father. Thats some hoss shit right there.
But don't be all badass and hero-like. You reach out to everyone, so maybe it is hard for you to reach out. Dont be scared if you need. A real man is one who can reach out, and not think he loses his manhood.
You know what you need to do but let us know if we can help make that happen,.
-Quit with u today, Nice guy-52
-
Dale,
I am very sorry to hear about your family's loss. I know that there are no words that can be used that will ease your grief or quell your anger. My family will keep you and your father in our prayers. Stay strong with your quit and know that we all quit with you each and every day. Stay strong.
-
Godspeed to you and your family 30.
-
Dale-
A prayer for you and your dad it is. I also pray that our children don't get involved in nicotine or any drug for that matter. It's our responsibility to talk honestly to our kids, again, and again, and again. Pray for them, with them.
You're a quit monster. The biggest balls I know. How many others would cave in times like this? You are right to channel the anger to the tabacco fucks and the nic bitch.
Stay strong brother.
-
Thanks again for the overwhelming support. I am deeply moved by it.
My sister-in-law (the wife of one of my other brothers) has been my brother's caregiver for the duration of the illness, which became a full time job for the last 3 months of his life. She wanted to do it, she is one very special lady. I owe her a huge debt of gratitude. She spent her time over the last 3 months granting his every wish, making him as comfortable as possible, cleaning, feeding, taking care of all of his medical needs, running out for ice cream to make milkshakes that she knew he would only take 1 sip of, She is truly physically and mentally exhausted at this point. Yesterday she told me this:
One night Keith decided that he wanted to sit up and watch movies downstairs like he used to. So she virtually carried him downstairs (at this point he didn't weigh much) and sat him up on the couch. The next morning she came back and he was asleep, Tv on, cigarette in the ashtray. Even in the midst of the terrible illness, big tobacco still had him hooked for "one more". That is why there is no "one more" for me- or for you.
There is nothing that will make me go back to active addiction. Is it "hard" to quit and stay that way? Yes, bit it is a whole lot easier than the journey my brother was forced to go on for the last year and a half of his life.
Stay Quit
30
-
You and your family are in my prayers 30......
-
Thanks again for the overwhelming support. I am deeply moved by it.
My sister-in-law (the wife of one of my other brothers) has been my brother's caregiver for the duration of the illness, which became a full time job for the last 3 months of his life. She wanted to do it, she is one very special lady. I owe her a huge debt of gratitude. She spent her time over the last 3 months granting his every wish, making him as comfortable as possible, cleaning, feeding, taking care of all of his medical needs, running out for ice cream to make milkshakes that she knew he would only take 1 sip of, She is truly physically and mentally exhausted at this point. Yesterday she told me this:
One night Keith decided that he wanted to sit up and watch movies downstairs like he used to. So she virtually carried him downstairs (at this point he didn't weigh much) and sat him up on the couch. The next morning she came back and he was asleep, Tv on, cigarette in the ashtray. Even in the midst of the terrible illness, big tobacco still had him hooked for "one more". That is why there is no "one more" for me- or for you.
There is nothing that will make me go back to active addiction. Is it "hard" to quit and stay that way? Yes, bit it is a whole lot easier than the journey my brother was forced to go on for the last year and a half of his life.
Stay Quit
30
Powerful !!
Proud to be quit with you !!
-
I am Sooo sorry to hear this 30!!! My Thoughts and Prayers are with you your Family. I am Very Proud to Quit with you each day!!! Stay Strong my Friend!!!
-
I'm so sorry for your loss man, you're in my prayers!
-
30,
I am sorry for your loss and you will be in my prayers. I am only 9 day's into my quit but it's folks like you that give me the strength to carry on. So you can add one more to the list that will stand by you against big tobacco.
-
A heartfelt thanks to the overwhelming support...over 100 KTC brothers/sisters reached out to me, and I am deeply moved by it. I am so thankful for all of you. In addition to all of the people below that posted, there were numerous texts, pms, posts here, and elsewhere across the site. I am proud to call all of you brothers and sisters.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30 309 A heartfelt thanks for all of the support, I am truly touched. For those of you who are inclined toward prayer, I would ask prayers for my father. It is one of the toughest things in the world to be pre-deceased by a son. Thank you and God Bless You all.
HKS-315, Dale, I am sorry for what you are going through. If you ever need to talk, we have each others numbers. Pain and Death are two of life's toughest lessons and there is never a guide book for each. Each time we experience them they can rattle us to our core. I am speechless at your loss. May God be with you.
Frazz - 350 - Dale, I quit with you today, to support you, to grieve with you. and to kick UST's ass today.
leeron-Day 21-I quit with Dale today. You and your family have the prayers of my family.
Rocketman-275-I'm quit with 30. I will pray for your you, your dad and family.
LD 319. Quit with Dale. Wish there was more I could do.
klark - 788, quit for 30's family today
maineguy- 326- Dale, prayers going out for you and your family, proud to be quit with you
associatejohn - 317 - My prayers are with you and your family Dale.
Peace - 248 - Dale, Quit with you. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Always here if you need anything...
nomosko I am so sorry Dale. My prayers are with you.
sno - 63 - Dale, so sorry for your loss. Prayers with you and your family.
AgLawyer - 144. Quit with Dale today. Your family will be in my thoughts and in my prayers while in church this morning.
Junkman - 327 - Quit with Dale.
Mcarmo44 - Day 46 - Quitting with Dale
expletive yes - day 19- I quit with Dale. God Bless You and your family.
Conholio - Day 27 - Praying for Dale and 30yraddict Sr. Everyone with kids should talk to them about the dangers of tobacco and drugs in general, again, and again, and again. Pray for them, with them.
ktb1764 - Day 25. Quit with 30. You are in my prayers.
Tex0322 - Day 35 - Quittin' with 30yr today. Sorry for your loss my brother.
JTRicher 206. Quit with 30 today. Peace be with you and your family.
Cornwallace - 252 - Quit with 30
J2b - 329 - thoughts and prayers with dale. Best thing we can do is honor them by ripping addicts from the clutches of big tobbaco and keeping them clean.
dchogs 217- quittin with 30.
Aggies1960 - Quit with 30 today. God bless.
sjs - 8 - Quit with Dale today.
pberg11 46 quittin with 30 today
Southerntux87- Day 57- I quit with 30 today.
Mitchell10 - 328 - via 3btn
Carpy 90- Today I quit with 30. I am praying for you and your family.
dforbes 224 quit with 30, thoughts and prayers with you and your family. YOU are one of the main reasons I am still quit today....I wish you the best always brother.
PaulRegali--Quitting with 30 today, sorry for your lose.
Taz - 180 - Quit with 30...you and your family are in our prayers.
Razz -- Thoughts and prayers to you and your family Dale
Davec -291- so sorry about your brother Dale..we will always be here for anything u need.
benny - day 33 quitting with you today, Dale.
Cane - 335 - My condolences 30.
Ninereasons -307 May God uphold your father, Dale, and the rest of your family.
Gold Lid - 42 - Quit with Dale today, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
duvall~43~Quit today with 30
nomoskobro - 103 - Quit with you today, Dale. Thanks for helping all of us. Thoughts with you today.
Kd5fic - 352 quit with 30 today. My condolences brother, prayers for you family are on the way.
skifreak - day 34 - praying for you and your family
Ready - 1417 Never again, for any reason. Thoughts for you and yours 30. Stay strong.
Bearnomore 54 days Quitting with 30 today.
Magnum 306- Quit with 30 in memory of his brother.
Steve1357- Day 147- Sorry for your loss 30. Your family is in my thoughts.
sac - 140 - sorry for your family's loss 30, quit today with you.
Quack -240 quit with 30 today. Sorry for your loss
Scowick - 373 - quit w/30. Dedicate the quit to the whole family.
Miles 286. Prayers to you and your family 30. Thinking about you today man.
Keddy - 419 - Quitting with Dale today. We will be praying for you and your family.
ODAAT - 321 - Prayers for Dale
FloridaLuke-460 Dale you need anything You let me know. Sorry for your loss
azchief32-110-Our prayers are with you 30, sorry for your loss brother.
SamCat...875!!! I am sooo Sorry for your Loss Dale!!! You have AMAZING Support here with all of us if you need anything!!! do not hesitate to ask...Prayers for you your Family Sent will Continue!!!
theo - Quitski. Dale...I'm so sorry for your loss. I've buried two very close family members in the last year. It's rough, but like all losses....it'll feel a little bit less painful over time. Hang in there, and stay close to your quit.
Dynasty-391-Quit with 30 and his family we got your back bro.
Tommy Dog - 40 - God bless you and your family 30 - Romans 8:28
rustaf Quitting with Dale and this great group of people. My deepest condolences to you and your family.
gator--623--quitting and praying for my quit bastard buddy, 30
Teachty 359 quit with thoughts for 30 and family
Copehater 413 - 30 - Thoughts and Prayers to you and your Family
TCOPE = 1078.... quit with you all today but especially Dale..... may God bless you and yours.....
J1919 - 80 - Sorry for your loss 30. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
gilbenl-329-quit w/30. We're here man.
Wvsuper-392-here with 30.
BBS - 305 - Sorry about your loss Dale.
Shadow66 via 3-baller Facebook network.
gmann 346- quit with my friend 30 today. You are in my prayers.
CB-man - 27 We are all here for you 30, my prayers go out to you.
Timeless117-- 98. Quit with 30 today
Now - 339 - quit with you 30.
wo1miles-110- Quit with 30. Like everyone else on here I feel personally for the loss of a brother's family member. God's blessings upon you and your family.
catfish - 859 our prayers are with you 30 yr addict
ncgolfer -30- Quit with 30, prayers are with you.
PbKid - 1064. Standing by 30.
nmc - 1,054 - I'm so sorry for your loss 30. My heart goes out to you.
Seth - 525. Posting support for 30. I haven't got the words.
Justinblake2188-day 110-quit with 30 today, o sorry for your loss
Mick - 64 - Thank you 30 for all you do. Prayers to you and your family.
dippshit - 56 - quit with 30
overdue32- day 108- thoughts and prayers are with you and your family 30
-
A heartfelt thanks to the overwhelming support...over 100 KTC brothers/sisters reached out to me, and I am deeply moved by it. I am so thankful for all of you. In addition to all of the people below that posted, there were numerous texts, pms, posts here, and elsewhere across the site. I am proud to call all of you brothers and sisters.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30 309 A heartfelt thanks for all of the support, I am truly touched. For those of you who are inclined toward prayer, I would ask prayers for my father. It is one of the toughest things in the world to be pre-deceased by a son. Thank you and God Bless You all.
HKS-315, Dale, I am sorry for what you are going through. If you ever need to talk, we have each others numbers. Pain and Death are two of life's toughest lessons and there is never a guide book for each. Each time we experience them they can rattle us to our core. I am speechless at your loss. May God be with you.
Frazz - 350 - Dale, I quit with you today, to support you, to grieve with you. and to kick UST's ass today.
leeron-Day 21-I quit with Dale today. You and your family have the prayers of my family.
Rocketman-275-I'm quit with 30. I will pray for your you, your dad and family.
LD 319. Quit with Dale. Wish there was more I could do.
klark - 788, quit for 30's family today
maineguy- 326- Dale, prayers going out for you and your family, proud to be quit with you
associatejohn - 317 - My prayers are with you and your family Dale.
Peace - 248 - Dale, Quit with you. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Always here if you need anything...
nomosko I am so sorry Dale. My prayers are with you.
sno - 63 - Dale, so sorry for your loss. Prayers with you and your family.
AgLawyer - 144. Quit with Dale today. Your family will be in my thoughts and in my prayers while in church this morning.
Junkman - 327 - Quit with Dale.
Mcarmo44 - Day 46 - Quitting with Dale
expletive yes - day 19- I quit with Dale. God Bless You and your family.
Conholio - Day 27 - Praying for Dale and 30yraddict Sr. Everyone with kids should talk to them about the dangers of tobacco and drugs in general, again, and again, and again. Pray for them, with them.
ktb1764 - Day 25. Quit with 30. You are in my prayers.
Tex0322 - Day 35 - Quittin' with 30yr today. Sorry for your loss my brother.
JTRicher 206. Quit with 30 today. Peace be with you and your family.
Cornwallace - 252 - Quit with 30
J2b - 329 - thoughts and prayers with dale. Best thing we can do is honor them by ripping addicts from the clutches of big tobbaco and keeping them clean.
dchogs 217- quittin with 30.
Aggies1960 - Quit with 30 today. God bless.
sjs - 8 - Quit with Dale today.
pberg11 46 quittin with 30 today
Southerntux87- Day 57- I quit with 30 today.
Mitchell10 - 328 - via 3btn
Carpy 90- Today I quit with 30. I am praying for you and your family.
dforbes 224 quit with 30, thoughts and prayers with you and your family. YOU are one of the main reasons I am still quit today....I wish you the best always brother.
PaulRegali--Quitting with 30 today, sorry for your lose.
Taz - 180 - Quit with 30...you and your family are in our prayers.
Razz -- Thoughts and prayers to you and your family Dale
Davec -291- so sorry about your brother Dale..we will always be here for anything u need.
benny - day 33 quitting with you today, Dale.
Cane - 335 - My condolences 30.
Ninereasons -307 May God uphold your father, Dale, and the rest of your family.
Gold Lid - 42 - Quit with Dale today, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
duvall~43~Quit today with 30
nomoskobro - 103 - Quit with you today, Dale. Thanks for helping all of us. Thoughts with you today.
Kd5fic - 352 quit with 30 today. My condolences brother, prayers for you family are on the way.
skifreak - day 34 - praying for you and your family
Ready - 1417 Never again, for any reason. Thoughts for you and yours 30. Stay strong.
Bearnomore 54 days Quitting with 30 today.
Magnum 306- Quit with 30 in memory of his brother.
Steve1357- Day 147- Sorry for your loss 30. Your family is in my thoughts.
sac - 140 - sorry for your family's loss 30, quit today with you.
Quack -240 quit with 30 today. Sorry for your loss
Scowick - 373 - quit w/30. Dedicate the quit to the whole family.
Miles 286. Prayers to you and your family 30. Thinking about you today man.
Keddy - 419 - Quitting with Dale today. We will be praying for you and your family.
ODAAT - 321 - Prayers for Dale
FloridaLuke-460 Dale you need anything You let me know. Sorry for your loss
azchief32-110-Our prayers are with you 30, sorry for your loss brother.
SamCat...875!!! I am sooo Sorry for your Loss Dale!!! You have AMAZING Support here with all of us if you need anything!!! do not hesitate to ask...Prayers for you your Family Sent will Continue!!!
theo - Quitski. Dale...I'm so sorry for your loss. I've buried two very close family members in the last year. It's rough, but like all losses....it'll feel a little bit less painful over time. Hang in there, and stay close to your quit.
Dynasty-391-Quit with 30 and his family we got your back bro.
Tommy Dog - 40 - God bless you and your family 30 - Romans 8:28
rustaf Quitting with Dale and this great group of people. My deepest condolences to you and your family.
gator--623--quitting and praying for my quit bastard buddy, 30
Teachty 359 quit with thoughts for 30 and family
Copehater 413 - 30 - Thoughts and Prayers to you and your Family
TCOPE = 1078.... quit with you all today but especially Dale..... may God bless you and yours.....
J1919 - 80 - Sorry for your loss 30. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
gilbenl-329-quit w/30. We're here man.
Wvsuper-392-here with 30.
BBS - 305 - Sorry about your loss Dale.
Shadow66 via 3-baller Facebook network.
gmann 346- quit with my friend 30 today. You are in my prayers.
CB-man - 27 We are all here for you 30, my prayers go out to you.
Timeless117-- 98. Quit with 30 today
Now - 339 - quit with you 30.
wo1miles-110- Quit with 30. Like everyone else on here I feel personally for the loss of a brother's family member. God's blessings upon you and your family.
catfish - 859 our prayers are with you 30 yr addict
ncgolfer -30- Quit with 30, prayers are with you.
PbKid - 1064. Standing by 30.
nmc - 1,054 - I'm so sorry for your loss 30. My heart goes out to you.
Seth - 525. Posting support for 30. I haven't got the words.
Justinblake2188-day 110-quit with 30 today, o sorry for your loss
Mick - 64 - Thank you 30 for all you do. Prayers to you and your family.
dippshit - 56 - quit with 30
overdue32- day 108- thoughts and prayers are with you and your family 30
ski - 739 - Dale, words cannot fill the space. Prayers to you and your family.
-
A heartfelt thanks to the overwhelming support...over 100 KTC brothers/sisters reached out to me, and I am deeply moved by it. I am so thankful for all of you. In addition to all of the people below that posted, there were numerous texts, pms, posts here, and elsewhere across the site. I am proud to call all of you brothers and sisters.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30 309 A heartfelt thanks for all of the support, I am truly touched. For those of you who are inclined toward prayer, I would ask prayers for my father. It is one of the toughest things in the world to be pre-deceased by a son. Thank you and God Bless You all.
HKS-315, Dale, I am sorry for what you are going through. If you ever need to talk, we have each others numbers. Pain and Death are two of life's toughest lessons and there is never a guide book for each. Each time we experience them they can rattle us to our core. I am speechless at your loss. May God be with you.
Frazz - 350 - Dale, I quit with you today, to support you, to grieve with you. and to kick UST's ass today.
leeron-Day 21-I quit with Dale today. You and your family have the prayers of my family.
Rocketman-275-I'm quit with 30. I will pray for your you, your dad and family.
LD 319. Quit with Dale. Wish there was more I could do.
klark - 788, quit for 30's family today
maineguy- 326- Dale, prayers going out for you and your family, proud to be quit with you
associatejohn - 317 - My prayers are with you and your family Dale.
Peace - 248 - Dale, Quit with you. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Always here if you need anything...
nomosko I am so sorry Dale. My prayers are with you.
sno - 63 - Dale, so sorry for your loss. Prayers with you and your family.
AgLawyer - 144. Quit with Dale today. Your family will be in my thoughts and in my prayers while in church this morning.
Junkman - 327 - Quit with Dale.
Mcarmo44 - Day 46 - Quitting with Dale
expletive yes - day 19- I quit with Dale. God Bless You and your family.
Conholio - Day 27 - Praying for Dale and 30yraddict Sr. Everyone with kids should talk to them about the dangers of tobacco and drugs in general, again, and again, and again. Pray for them, with them.
ktb1764 - Day 25. Quit with 30. You are in my prayers.
Tex0322 - Day 35 - Quittin' with 30yr today. Sorry for your loss my brother.
JTRicher 206. Quit with 30 today. Peace be with you and your family.
Cornwallace - 252 - Quit with 30
J2b - 329 - thoughts and prayers with dale. Best thing we can do is honor them by ripping addicts from the clutches of big tobbaco and keeping them clean.
dchogs 217- quittin with 30.
Aggies1960 - Quit with 30 today. God bless.
sjs - 8 - Quit with Dale today.
pberg11 46 quittin with 30 today
Southerntux87- Day 57- I quit with 30 today.
Mitchell10 - 328 - via 3btn
Carpy 90- Today I quit with 30. I am praying for you and your family.
dforbes 224 quit with 30, thoughts and prayers with you and your family. YOU are one of the main reasons I am still quit today....I wish you the best always brother.
PaulRegali--Quitting with 30 today, sorry for your lose.
Taz - 180 - Quit with 30...you and your family are in our prayers.
Razz -- Thoughts and prayers to you and your family Dale
Davec -291- so sorry about your brother Dale..we will always be here for anything u need.
benny - day 33 quitting with you today, Dale.
Cane - 335 - My condolences 30.
Ninereasons -307 May God uphold your father, Dale, and the rest of your family.
Gold Lid - 42 - Quit with Dale today, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
duvall~43~Quit today with 30
nomoskobro - 103 - Quit with you today, Dale. Thanks for helping all of us. Thoughts with you today.
Kd5fic - 352 quit with 30 today. My condolences brother, prayers for you family are on the way.
skifreak - day 34 - praying for you and your family
Ready - 1417 Never again, for any reason. Thoughts for you and yours 30. Stay strong.
Bearnomore 54 days Quitting with 30 today.
Magnum 306- Quit with 30 in memory of his brother.
Steve1357- Day 147- Sorry for your loss 30. Your family is in my thoughts.
sac - 140 - sorry for your family's loss 30, quit today with you.
Quack -240 quit with 30 today. Sorry for your loss
Scowick - 373 - quit w/30. Dedicate the quit to the whole family.
Miles 286. Prayers to you and your family 30. Thinking about you today man.
Keddy - 419 - Quitting with Dale today. We will be praying for you and your family.
ODAAT - 321 - Prayers for Dale
FloridaLuke-460 Dale you need anything You let me know. Sorry for your loss
azchief32-110-Our prayers are with you 30, sorry for your loss brother.
SamCat...875!!! I am sooo Sorry for your Loss Dale!!! You have AMAZING Support here with all of us if you need anything!!! do not hesitate to ask...Prayers for you your Family Sent will Continue!!!
theo - Quitski. Dale...I'm so sorry for your loss. I've buried two very close family members in the last year. It's rough, but like all losses....it'll feel a little bit less painful over time. Hang in there, and stay close to your quit.
Dynasty-391-Quit with 30 and his family we got your back bro.
Tommy Dog - 40 - God bless you and your family 30 - Romans 8:28
rustaf Quitting with Dale and this great group of people. My deepest condolences to you and your family.
gator--623--quitting and praying for my quit bastard buddy, 30
Teachty 359 quit with thoughts for 30 and family
Copehater 413 - 30 - Thoughts and Prayers to you and your Family
TCOPE = 1078.... quit with you all today but especially Dale..... may God bless you and yours.....
J1919 - 80 - Sorry for your loss 30. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
gilbenl-329-quit w/30. We're here man.
Wvsuper-392-here with 30.
BBS - 305 - Sorry about your loss Dale.
Shadow66 via 3-baller Facebook network.
gmann 346- quit with my friend 30 today. You are in my prayers.
CB-man - 27 We are all here for you 30, my prayers go out to you.
Timeless117-- 98. Quit with 30 today
Now - 339 - quit with you 30.
wo1miles-110- Quit with 30. Like everyone else on here I feel personally for the loss of a brother's family member. God's blessings upon you and your family.
catfish - 859 our prayers are with you 30 yr addict
ncgolfer -30- Quit with 30, prayers are with you.
PbKid - 1064. Standing by 30.
nmc - 1,054 - I'm so sorry for your loss 30. My heart goes out to you.
Seth - 525. Posting support for 30. I haven't got the words.
Justinblake2188-day 110-quit with 30 today, o sorry for your loss
Mick - 64 - Thank you 30 for all you do. Prayers to you and your family.
dippshit - 56 - quit with 30
overdue32- day 108- thoughts and prayers are with you and your family 30
ski - 739 - Dale, words cannot fill the space. Prayers to you and your family.
Mjollnir - 729 - Don't follow that religion, but our thoughts are with you.
-
A heartfelt thanks to the overwhelming support...over 100 KTC brothers/sisters reached out to me, and I am deeply moved by it. I am so thankful for all of you. In addition to all of the people below that posted, there were numerous texts, pms, posts here, and elsewhere across the site. I am proud to call all of you brothers and sisters.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30 309 A heartfelt thanks for all of the support, I am truly touched. For those of you who are inclined toward prayer, I would ask prayers for my father. It is one of the toughest things in the world to be pre-deceased by a son. Thank you and God Bless You all.
HKS-315, Dale, I am sorry for what you are going through. If you ever need to talk, we have each others numbers. Pain and Death are two of life's toughest lessons and there is never a guide book for each. Each time we experience them they can rattle us to our core. I am speechless at your loss. May God be with you.
Frazz - 350 - Dale, I quit with you today, to support you, to grieve with you. and to kick UST's ass today.
leeron-Day 21-I quit with Dale today. You and your family have the prayers of my family.
Rocketman-275-I'm quit with 30. I will pray for your you, your dad and family.
LD 319. Quit with Dale. Wish there was more I could do.
klark - 788, quit for 30's family today
maineguy- 326- Dale, prayers going out for you and your family, proud to be quit with you
associatejohn - 317 - My prayers are with you and your family Dale.
Peace - 248 - Dale, Quit with you. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Always here if you need anything...
nomosko I am so sorry Dale. My prayers are with you.
sno - 63 - Dale, so sorry for your loss. Prayers with you and your family.
AgLawyer - 144. Quit with Dale today. Your family will be in my thoughts and in my prayers while in church this morning.
Junkman - 327 - Quit with Dale.
Mcarmo44 - Day 46 - Quitting with Dale
expletive yes - day 19- I quit with Dale. God Bless You and your family.
Conholio - Day 27 - Praying for Dale and 30yraddict Sr. Everyone with kids should talk to them about the dangers of tobacco and drugs in general, again, and again, and again. Pray for them, with them.
ktb1764 - Day 25. Quit with 30. You are in my prayers.
Tex0322 - Day 35 - Quittin' with 30yr today. Sorry for your loss my brother.
JTRicher 206. Quit with 30 today. Peace be with you and your family.
Cornwallace - 252 - Quit with 30
J2b - 329 - thoughts and prayers with dale. Best thing we can do is honor them by ripping addicts from the clutches of big tobbaco and keeping them clean.
dchogs 217- quittin with 30.
Aggies1960 - Quit with 30 today. God bless.
sjs - 8 - Quit with Dale today.
pberg11 46 quittin with 30 today
Southerntux87- Day 57- I quit with 30 today.
Mitchell10 - 328 - via 3btn
Carpy 90- Today I quit with 30. I am praying for you and your family.
dforbes 224 quit with 30, thoughts and prayers with you and your family. YOU are one of the main reasons I am still quit today....I wish you the best always brother.
PaulRegali--Quitting with 30 today, sorry for your lose.
Taz - 180 - Quit with 30...you and your family are in our prayers.
Razz -- Thoughts and prayers to you and your family Dale
Davec -291- so sorry about your brother Dale..we will always be here for anything u need.
benny - day 33 quitting with you today, Dale.
Cane - 335 - My condolences 30.
Ninereasons -307 May God uphold your father, Dale, and the rest of your family.
Gold Lid - 42 - Quit with Dale today, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
duvall~43~Quit today with 30
nomoskobro - 103 - Quit with you today, Dale. Thanks for helping all of us. Thoughts with you today.
Kd5fic - 352 quit with 30 today. My condolences brother, prayers for you family are on the way.
skifreak - day 34 - praying for you and your family
Ready - 1417 Never again, for any reason. Thoughts for you and yours 30. Stay strong.
Bearnomore 54 days Quitting with 30 today.
Magnum 306- Quit with 30 in memory of his brother.
Steve1357- Day 147- Sorry for your loss 30. Your family is in my thoughts.
sac - 140 - sorry for your family's loss 30, quit today with you.
Quack -240 quit with 30 today. Sorry for your loss
Scowick - 373 - quit w/30. Dedicate the quit to the whole family.
Miles 286. Prayers to you and your family 30. Thinking about you today man.
Keddy - 419 - Quitting with Dale today. We will be praying for you and your family.
ODAAT - 321 - Prayers for Dale
FloridaLuke-460 Dale you need anything You let me know. Sorry for your loss
azchief32-110-Our prayers are with you 30, sorry for your loss brother.
SamCat...875!!! I am sooo Sorry for your Loss Dale!!! You have AMAZING Support here with all of us if you need anything!!! do not hesitate to ask...Prayers for you your Family Sent will Continue!!!
theo - Quitski. Dale...I'm so sorry for your loss. I've buried two very close family members in the last year. It's rough, but like all losses....it'll feel a little bit less painful over time. Hang in there, and stay close to your quit.
Dynasty-391-Quit with 30 and his family we got your back bro.
Tommy Dog - 40 - God bless you and your family 30 - Romans 8:28
rustaf Quitting with Dale and this great group of people. My deepest condolences to you and your family.
gator--623--quitting and praying for my quit bastard buddy, 30
Teachty 359 quit with thoughts for 30 and family
Copehater 413 - 30 - Thoughts and Prayers to you and your Family
TCOPE = 1078.... quit with you all today but especially Dale..... may God bless you and yours.....
J1919 - 80 - Sorry for your loss 30. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
gilbenl-329-quit w/30. We're here man.
Wvsuper-392-here with 30.
BBS - 305 - Sorry about your loss Dale.
Shadow66 via 3-baller Facebook network.
gmann 346- quit with my friend 30 today. You are in my prayers.
CB-man - 27 We are all here for you 30, my prayers go out to you.
Timeless117-- 98. Quit with 30 today
Now - 339 - quit with you 30.
wo1miles-110- Quit with 30. Like everyone else on here I feel personally for the loss of a brother's family member. God's blessings upon you and your family.
catfish - 859 our prayers are with you 30 yr addict
ncgolfer -30- Quit with 30, prayers are with you.
PbKid - 1064. Standing by 30.
nmc - 1,054 - I'm so sorry for your loss 30. My heart goes out to you.
Seth - 525. Posting support for 30. I haven't got the words.
Justinblake2188-day 110-quit with 30 today, o sorry for your loss
Mick - 64 - Thank you 30 for all you do. Prayers to you and your family.
dippshit - 56 - quit with 30
overdue32- day 108- thoughts and prayers are with you and your family 30
ski - 739 - Dale, words cannot fill the space. Prayers to you and your family.
Mjollnir - 729 - Don't follow that religion, but our thoughts are with you.
jmag- 223- Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
-
A heartfelt thanks to the overwhelming support...over 100 KTC brothers/sisters reached out to me, and I am deeply moved by it. I am so thankful for all of you. In addition to all of the people below that posted, there were numerous texts, pms, posts here, and elsewhere across the site. I am proud to call all of you brothers and sisters.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30 309 A heartfelt thanks for all of the support, I am truly touched. For those of you who are inclined toward prayer, I would ask prayers for my father. It is one of the toughest things in the world to be pre-deceased by a son. Thank you and God Bless You all.
HKS-315, Dale, I am sorry for what you are going through. If you ever need to talk, we have each others numbers. Pain and Death are two of life's toughest lessons and there is never a guide book for each. Each time we experience them they can rattle us to our core. I am speechless at your loss. May God be with you.
Frazz - 350 - Dale, I quit with you today, to support you, to grieve with you. and to kick UST's ass today.
leeron-Day 21-I quit with Dale today. You and your family have the prayers of my family.
Rocketman-275-I'm quit with 30. I will pray for your you, your dad and family.
LD 319. Quit with Dale. Wish there was more I could do.
klark - 788, quit for 30's family today
maineguy- 326- Dale, prayers going out for you and your family, proud to be quit with you
associatejohn - 317 - My prayers are with you and your family Dale.
Peace - 248 - Dale, Quit with you. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Always here if you need anything...
nomosko I am so sorry Dale. My prayers are with you.
sno - 63 - Dale, so sorry for your loss. Prayers with you and your family.
AgLawyer - 144. Quit with Dale today. Your family will be in my thoughts and in my prayers while in church this morning.
Junkman - 327 - Quit with Dale.
Mcarmo44 - Day 46 - Quitting with Dale
expletive yes - day 19- I quit with Dale. God Bless You and your family.
Conholio - Day 27 - Praying for Dale and 30yraddict Sr. Everyone with kids should talk to them about the dangers of tobacco and drugs in general, again, and again, and again. Pray for them, with them.
ktb1764 - Day 25. Quit with 30. You are in my prayers.
Tex0322 - Day 35 - Quittin' with 30yr today. Sorry for your loss my brother.
JTRicher 206. Quit with 30 today. Peace be with you and your family.
Cornwallace - 252 - Quit with 30
J2b - 329 - thoughts and prayers with dale. Best thing we can do is honor them by ripping addicts from the clutches of big tobbaco and keeping them clean.
dchogs 217- quittin with 30.
Aggies1960 - Quit with 30 today. God bless.
sjs - 8 - Quit with Dale today.
pberg11 46 quittin with 30 today
Southerntux87- Day 57- I quit with 30 today.
Mitchell10 - 328 - via 3btn
Carpy 90- Today I quit with 30. I am praying for you and your family.
dforbes 224 quit with 30, thoughts and prayers with you and your family. YOU are one of the main reasons I am still quit today....I wish you the best always brother.
PaulRegali--Quitting with 30 today, sorry for your lose.
Taz - 180 - Quit with 30...you and your family are in our prayers.
Razz -- Thoughts and prayers to you and your family Dale
Davec -291- so sorry about your brother Dale..we will always be here for anything u need.
benny - day 33 quitting with you today, Dale.
Cane - 335 - My condolences 30.
Ninereasons -307 May God uphold your father, Dale, and the rest of your family.
Gold Lid - 42 - Quit with Dale today, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
duvall~43~Quit today with 30
nomoskobro - 103 - Quit with you today, Dale. Thanks for helping all of us. Thoughts with you today.
Kd5fic - 352 quit with 30 today. My condolences brother, prayers for you family are on the way.
skifreak - day 34 - praying for you and your family
Ready - 1417 Never again, for any reason. Thoughts for you and yours 30. Stay strong.
Bearnomore 54 days Quitting with 30 today.
Magnum 306- Quit with 30 in memory of his brother.
Steve1357- Day 147- Sorry for your loss 30. Your family is in my thoughts.
sac - 140 - sorry for your family's loss 30, quit today with you.
Quack -240 quit with 30 today. Sorry for your loss
Scowick - 373 - quit w/30. Dedicate the quit to the whole family.
Miles 286. Prayers to you and your family 30. Thinking about you today man.
Keddy - 419 - Quitting with Dale today. We will be praying for you and your family.
ODAAT - 321 - Prayers for Dale
FloridaLuke-460 Dale you need anything You let me know. Sorry for your loss
azchief32-110-Our prayers are with you 30, sorry for your loss brother.
SamCat...875!!! I am sooo Sorry for your Loss Dale!!! You have AMAZING Support here with all of us if you need anything!!! do not hesitate to ask...Prayers for you your Family Sent will Continue!!!
theo - Quitski. Dale...I'm so sorry for your loss. I've buried two very close family members in the last year. It's rough, but like all losses....it'll feel a little bit less painful over time. Hang in there, and stay close to your quit.
Dynasty-391-Quit with 30 and his family we got your back bro.
Tommy Dog - 40 - God bless you and your family 30 - Romans 8:28
rustaf Quitting with Dale and this great group of people. My deepest condolences to you and your family.
gator--623--quitting and praying for my quit bastard buddy, 30
Teachty 359 quit with thoughts for 30 and family
Copehater 413 - 30 - Thoughts and Prayers to you and your Family
TCOPE = 1078.... quit with you all today but especially Dale..... may God bless you and yours.....
J1919 - 80 - Sorry for your loss 30. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
gilbenl-329-quit w/30. We're here man.
Wvsuper-392-here with 30.
BBS - 305 - Sorry about your loss Dale.
Shadow66 via 3-baller Facebook network.
gmann 346- quit with my friend 30 today. You are in my prayers.
CB-man - 27 We are all here for you 30, my prayers go out to you.
Timeless117-- 98. Quit with 30 today
Now - 339 - quit with you 30.
wo1miles-110- Quit with 30. Like everyone else on here I feel personally for the loss of a brother's family member. God's blessings upon you and your family.
catfish - 859 our prayers are with you 30 yr addict
ncgolfer -30- Quit with 30, prayers are with you.
PbKid - 1064. Standing by 30.
nmc - 1,054 - I'm so sorry for your loss 30. My heart goes out to you.
Seth - 525. Posting support for 30. I haven't got the words.
Justinblake2188-day 110-quit with 30 today, o sorry for your loss
Mick - 64 - Thank you 30 for all you do. Prayers to you and your family.
dippshit - 56 - quit with 30
overdue32- day 108- thoughts and prayers are with you and your family 30
ski - 739 - Dale, words cannot fill the space. Prayers to you and your family.
Mjollnir - 729 - Don't follow that religion, but our thoughts are with you.
jmag- 223- Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
dippshit - 57 - You and your family are in my prayers. Thank you for all that you do here.
-
A heartfelt thanks to the overwhelming support...over 100 KTC brothers/sisters reached out to me, and I am deeply moved by it. I am so thankful for all of you. In addition to all of the people below that posted, there were numerous texts, pms, posts here, and elsewhere across the site. I am proud to call all of you brothers and sisters.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30 309 A heartfelt thanks for all of the support, I am truly touched. For those of you who are inclined toward prayer, I would ask prayers for my father. It is one of the toughest things in the world to be pre-deceased by a son. Thank you and God Bless You all.
HKS-315, Dale, I am sorry for what you are going through. If you ever need to talk, we have each others numbers. Pain and Death are two of life's toughest lessons and there is never a guide book for each. Each time we experience them they can rattle us to our core. I am speechless at your loss. May God be with you.
Frazz - 350 - Dale, I quit with you today, to support you, to grieve with you. and to kick UST's ass today.
leeron-Day 21-I quit with Dale today. You and your family have the prayers of my family.
Rocketman-275-I'm quit with 30. I will pray for your you, your dad and family.
LD 319. Quit with Dale. Wish there was more I could do.
klark - 788, quit for 30's family today
maineguy- 326- Dale, prayers going out for you and your family, proud to be quit with you
associatejohn - 317 - My prayers are with you and your family Dale.
Peace - 248 - Dale, Quit with you. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Always here if you need anything...
nomosko I am so sorry Dale. My prayers are with you.
sno - 63 - Dale, so sorry for your loss. Prayers with you and your family.
AgLawyer - 144. Quit with Dale today. Your family will be in my thoughts and in my prayers while in church this morning.
Junkman - 327 - Quit with Dale.
Mcarmo44 - Day 46 - Quitting with Dale
expletive yes - day 19- I quit with Dale. God Bless You and your family.
Conholio - Day 27 - Praying for Dale and 30yraddict Sr. Everyone with kids should talk to them about the dangers of tobacco and drugs in general, again, and again, and again. Pray for them, with them.
ktb1764 - Day 25. Quit with 30. You are in my prayers.
Tex0322 - Day 35 - Quittin' with 30yr today. Sorry for your loss my brother.
JTRicher 206. Quit with 30 today. Peace be with you and your family.
Cornwallace - 252 - Quit with 30
J2b - 329 - thoughts and prayers with dale. Best thing we can do is honor them by ripping addicts from the clutches of big tobbaco and keeping them clean.
dchogs 217- quittin with 30.
Aggies1960 - Quit with 30 today. God bless.
sjs - 8 - Quit with Dale today.
pberg11 46 quittin with 30 today
Southerntux87- Day 57- I quit with 30 today.
Mitchell10 - 328 - via 3btn
Carpy 90- Today I quit with 30. I am praying for you and your family.
dforbes 224 quit with 30, thoughts and prayers with you and your family. YOU are one of the main reasons I am still quit today....I wish you the best always brother.
PaulRegali--Quitting with 30 today, sorry for your lose.
Taz - 180 - Quit with 30...you and your family are in our prayers.
Razz -- Thoughts and prayers to you and your family Dale
Davec -291- so sorry about your brother Dale..we will always be here for anything u need.
benny - day 33 quitting with you today, Dale.
Cane - 335 - My condolences 30.
Ninereasons -307 May God uphold your father, Dale, and the rest of your family.
Gold Lid - 42 - Quit with Dale today, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
duvall~43~Quit today with 30
nomoskobro - 103 - Quit with you today, Dale. Thanks for helping all of us. Thoughts with you today.
Kd5fic - 352 quit with 30 today. My condolences brother, prayers for you family are on the way.
skifreak - day 34 - praying for you and your family
Ready - 1417 Never again, for any reason. Thoughts for you and yours 30. Stay strong.
Bearnomore 54 days Quitting with 30 today.
Magnum 306- Quit with 30 in memory of his brother.
Steve1357- Day 147- Sorry for your loss 30. Your family is in my thoughts.
sac - 140 - sorry for your family's loss 30, quit today with you.
Quack -240 quit with 30 today. Sorry for your loss
Scowick - 373 - quit w/30. Dedicate the quit to the whole family.
Miles 286. Prayers to you and your family 30. Thinking about you today man.
Keddy - 419 - Quitting with Dale today. We will be praying for you and your family.
ODAAT - 321 - Prayers for Dale
FloridaLuke-460 Dale you need anything You let me know. Sorry for your loss
azchief32-110-Our prayers are with you 30, sorry for your loss brother.
SamCat...875!!! I am sooo Sorry for your Loss Dale!!! You have AMAZING Support here with all of us if you need anything!!! do not hesitate to ask...Prayers for you your Family Sent will Continue!!!
theo - Quitski. Dale...I'm so sorry for your loss. I've buried two very close family members in the last year. It's rough, but like all losses....it'll feel a little bit less painful over time. Hang in there, and stay close to your quit.
Dynasty-391-Quit with 30 and his family we got your back bro.
Tommy Dog - 40 - God bless you and your family 30 - Romans 8:28
rustaf Quitting with Dale and this great group of people. My deepest condolences to you and your family.
gator--623--quitting and praying for my quit bastard buddy, 30
Teachty 359 quit with thoughts for 30 and family
Copehater 413 - 30 - Thoughts and Prayers to you and your Family
TCOPE = 1078.... quit with you all today but especially Dale..... may God bless you and yours.....
J1919 - 80 - Sorry for your loss 30. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
gilbenl-329-quit w/30. We're here man.
Wvsuper-392-here with 30.
BBS - 305 - Sorry about your loss Dale.
Shadow66 via 3-baller Facebook network.
gmann 346- quit with my friend 30 today. You are in my prayers.
CB-man - 27 We are all here for you 30, my prayers go out to you.
Timeless117-- 98. Quit with 30 today
Now - 339 - quit with you 30.
wo1miles-110- Quit with 30. Like everyone else on here I feel personally for the loss of a brother's family member. God's blessings upon you and your family.
catfish - 859 our prayers are with you 30 yr addict
ncgolfer -30- Quit with 30, prayers are with you.
PbKid - 1064. Standing by 30.
nmc - 1,054 - I'm so sorry for your loss 30. My heart goes out to you.
Seth - 525. Posting support for 30. I haven't got the words.
Justinblake2188-day 110-quit with 30 today, o sorry for your loss
Mick - 64 - Thank you 30 for all you do. Prayers to you and your family.
dippshit - 56 - quit with 30
overdue32- day 108- thoughts and prayers are with you and your family 30
ski - 739 - Dale, words cannot fill the space. Prayers to you and your family.
Mjollnir - 729 - Don't follow that religion, but our thoughts are with you.
jmag- 223- Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
dippshit - 57 - You and your family are in my prayers. Thank you for all that you do here.
My prayers are with you.
-
A heartfelt thanks to the overwhelming support...over 100 KTC brothers/sisters reached out to me, and I am deeply moved by it. I am so thankful for all of you. In addition to all of the people below that posted, there were numerous texts, pms, posts here, and elsewhere across the site. I am proud to call all of you brothers and sisters.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
30 309 A heartfelt thanks for all of the support, I am truly touched. For those of you who are inclined toward prayer, I would ask prayers for my father. It is one of the toughest things in the world to be pre-deceased by a son. Thank you and God Bless You all.
HKS-315, Dale, I am sorry for what you are going through. If you ever need to talk, we have each others numbers. Pain and Death are two of life's toughest lessons and there is never a guide book for each. Each time we experience them they can rattle us to our core. I am speechless at your loss. May God be with you.
Frazz - 350 - Dale, I quit with you today, to support you, to grieve with you. and to kick UST's ass today.
leeron-Day 21-I quit with Dale today. You and your family have the prayers of my family.
Rocketman-275-I'm quit with 30. I will pray for your you, your dad and family.
LD 319. Quit with Dale. Wish there was more I could do.
klark - 788, quit for 30's family today
maineguy- 326- Dale, prayers going out for you and your family, proud to be quit with you
associatejohn - 317 - My prayers are with you and your family Dale.
Peace - 248 - Dale, Quit with you. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Always here if you need anything...
nomosko I am so sorry Dale. My prayers are with you.
sno - 63 - Dale, so sorry for your loss. Prayers with you and your family.
AgLawyer - 144. Quit with Dale today. Your family will be in my thoughts and in my prayers while in church this morning.
Junkman - 327 - Quit with Dale.
Mcarmo44 - Day 46 - Quitting with Dale
expletive yes - day 19- I quit with Dale. God Bless You and your family.
Conholio - Day 27 - Praying for Dale and 30yraddict Sr. Everyone with kids should talk to them about the dangers of tobacco and drugs in general, again, and again, and again. Pray for them, with them.
ktb1764 - Day 25. Quit with 30. You are in my prayers.
Tex0322 - Day 35 - Quittin' with 30yr today. Sorry for your loss my brother.
JTRicher 206. Quit with 30 today. Peace be with you and your family.
Cornwallace - 252 - Quit with 30
J2b - 329 - thoughts and prayers with dale. Best thing we can do is honor them by ripping addicts from the clutches of big tobbaco and keeping them clean.
dchogs 217- quittin with 30.
Aggies1960 - Quit with 30 today. God bless.
sjs - 8 - Quit with Dale today.
pberg11 46 quittin with 30 today
Southerntux87- Day 57- I quit with 30 today.
Mitchell10 - 328 - via 3btn
Carpy 90- Today I quit with 30. I am praying for you and your family.
dforbes 224 quit with 30, thoughts and prayers with you and your family. YOU are one of the main reasons I am still quit today....I wish you the best always brother.
PaulRegali--Quitting with 30 today, sorry for your lose.
Taz - 180 - Quit with 30...you and your family are in our prayers.
Razz -- Thoughts and prayers to you and your family Dale
Davec -291- so sorry about your brother Dale..we will always be here for anything u need.
benny - day 33 quitting with you today, Dale.
Cane - 335 - My condolences 30.
Ninereasons -307 May God uphold your father, Dale, and the rest of your family.
Gold Lid - 42 - Quit with Dale today, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
duvall~43~Quit today with 30
nomoskobro - 103 - Quit with you today, Dale. Thanks for helping all of us. Thoughts with you today.
Kd5fic - 352 quit with 30 today. My condolences brother, prayers for you family are on the way.
skifreak - day 34 - praying for you and your family
Ready - 1417 Never again, for any reason. Thoughts for you and yours 30. Stay strong.
Bearnomore 54 days Quitting with 30 today.
Magnum 306- Quit with 30 in memory of his brother.
Steve1357- Day 147- Sorry for your loss 30. Your family is in my thoughts.
sac - 140 - sorry for your family's loss 30, quit today with you.
Quack -240 quit with 30 today. Sorry for your loss
Scowick - 373 - quit w/30. Dedicate the quit to the whole family.
Miles 286. Prayers to you and your family 30. Thinking about you today man.
Keddy - 419 - Quitting with Dale today. We will be praying for you and your family.
ODAAT - 321 - Prayers for Dale
FloridaLuke-460 Dale you need anything You let me know. Sorry for your loss
azchief32-110-Our prayers are with you 30, sorry for your loss brother.
SamCat...875!!! I am sooo Sorry for your Loss Dale!!! You have AMAZING Support here with all of us if you need anything!!! do not hesitate to ask...Prayers for you your Family Sent will Continue!!!
theo - Quitski. Dale...I'm so sorry for your loss. I've buried two very close family members in the last year. It's rough, but like all losses....it'll feel a little bit less painful over time. Hang in there, and stay close to your quit.
Dynasty-391-Quit with 30 and his family we got your back bro.
Tommy Dog - 40 - God bless you and your family 30 - Romans 8:28
rustaf Quitting with Dale and this great group of people. My deepest condolences to you and your family.
gator--623--quitting and praying for my quit bastard buddy, 30
Teachty 359 quit with thoughts for 30 and family
Copehater 413 - 30 - Thoughts and Prayers to you and your Family
TCOPE = 1078.... quit with you all today but especially Dale..... may God bless you and yours.....
J1919 - 80 - Sorry for your loss 30. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
gilbenl-329-quit w/30. We're here man.
Wvsuper-392-here with 30.
BBS - 305 - Sorry about your loss Dale.
Shadow66 via 3-baller Facebook network.
gmann 346- quit with my friend 30 today. You are in my prayers.
CB-man - 27 We are all here for you 30, my prayers go out to you.
Timeless117-- 98. Quit with 30 today
Now - 339 - quit with you 30.
wo1miles-110- Quit with 30. Like everyone else on here I feel personally for the loss of a brother's family member. God's blessings upon you and your family.
catfish - 859 our prayers are with you 30 yr addict
ncgolfer -30- Quit with 30, prayers are with you.
PbKid - 1064. Standing by 30.
nmc - 1,054 - I'm so sorry for your loss 30. My heart goes out to you.
Seth - 525. Posting support for 30. I haven't got the words.
Justinblake2188-day 110-quit with 30 today, o sorry for your loss
Mick - 64 - Thank you 30 for all you do. Prayers to you and your family.
dippshit - 56 - quit with 30
overdue32- day 108- thoughts and prayers are with you and your family 30
ski - 739 - Dale, words cannot fill the space. Prayers to you and your family.
Mjollnir - 729 -Â Don't follow that religion, but our thoughts are with you.
jmag- 223-Â Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
dippshit - 57 - You and your family are in my prayers. Thank you for all that you do here.
My prayers are with you.
If you need to talk or anything you let me know! My prayers are with you bro!
-
30's quit resources
Complacency
Some of you might be at a stage where this quit is...dare I say it? Kinda EASY! You haven't been craving as much, hell sometimes you barely even think about dip. You might even be wondering why it took you so long to quit, as it really wasn't as hard as you thought...
I know I came to that stage about day 25 or so. Now the face of the enemy has changed. Your first days were sheer willpower, withdrawals, craves, reaching for a can that was no longer there...but now your enemy has a new name: COMPLACENCY....
The nic-bitch has been waiting for this point, waiting for the time you go out without your cell phone, waiting for the time you get drunk, or until you will listen to her little promptings that you can have "just one". Waiting until you know that you own this addiction, that no thought or planning is required to protect your quit. She's waiting to separate you from your support, get you distant from the herd so she can move in for the kill.
COMPLACENCY- This enemy you will battle for perhaps thousands of days, perhaps even for the rest of your life. I can tell you I would LOVE to forget about dip, love to forget about this stupid addiction, but I know I should not, that I cannot. You see, i have failed at quitting many times, I know what happens when I forget. To forget is to fail.
For that reason, you will see me posting roll tomorrow. It is how I have begun my day for the last 321 days in a row- a reminder that I am an addict, lest I forget.
–--------------------------------------------------------–----------------------------------------
A Word to the Retreads
I wanted to wait until all of the drama died down to have a word with you....
So you are back...and posting roll...Doing the things I would expect to see from someone who is serious about their quit...In addition to posting roll, I sure hope you are living, breathing, drinking the kool aid here.
You can believe 2 things about this place: It's nothing more than a tool to help you quit and the people here are just strangers in cyberspace........ or this is a place full of dead serious quitters intent on saving their own life and helping others save theirs.
In the short time I have been here, I have actually met several quitters, talked to some more on the phone, texted still others, and keep in contact with others through facebook, pm, and email. I have moved the KTC experience far beyond some self help website in cyberspace. I have no place to hide...In order to get away from these folks I would have to change my home number, email address, cell number, move (yes some of them know where I live), abandon my facebook account, and ask my kids and wife to abandon theirs.
In other words- this is my last quit- and I am all in. I have built my accountability to the point that there is no going back...no hedged bets, no retreat clause, no surrender.
My question for you is: Have you decided this is your last quit? Then box yourself in...build your accountability to the point there is no escape. Take every opportunity to be held accountable to other quitters. Stay in constant contact with people that will not tolerate addict thinking. In short put all your chips in the center of the table...go all in.
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Is Posting Roll Enough?
So you've got a handle on how the site works, right? Post roll, honor that promise, repeat...is that all it takes? Technically, yes that is all it takes- if you do those three things every day without fail, you will quit for the rest of your life one today at a time- except -it doesn't seem to play out that way for many folks....That program is the foundation, the cornerstone of the program here. It is the bare minimum. That's the problem right there- people who do the bare minimum for their quit tend not to stick with it over the long haul. I can tell these people right away- they are the ones that you almost never see here as they are only here long enough to post roll. Those are the folks that you have to PM and/or use multiple posts to get their attention, because they don't even take the time to scroll down to find out what happened to their quit brothers/sisters throughout the day....hell they don't even look over the roll they are posting in to see what others are going through. I am pretty convinced I could change the header to "December Druids in Favor of Clubbing Baby Seals to Death" and they would come in, hit the quote button post their roll and leave... These people contribute nothing to the site- they are just a name followed by a number. Just as they were on the site they tend to just fade away into oblivion...and when they are gone, nobody really notices...sometimes they come back and post a day 1...usually it doesn't matter though. Because they usually just do the same thing all over again....post roll, leave the site quickly, fade away....
Then there are those that "get it". Those that understand the more they have invested in their quit, the better. Those that post roll every day and then build on it with developing accountability by exchanging numbers, reading the treasure chest of knowledge that is found throughout the site, by stepping up an helping other quitters- those are the people who stay quit.
Is your quit worth more than the bare minimum? If it's not- I predict a cave in your future. Post Roll, Honor Your Promise, Repeat. Exchange Numbers, Read, Take the time to help quitters new and old. Invest in your quit.
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A Word to Those That Know More than the Vets
Imagine that you are standing in front of a minefield...on the other side of that minefield stands a soldier...not only has he walked that minefield safely, but he has guided thousands of others through that minefield safely as well.. He hails you from the other side and offers to guide you across safely...
do you:
a) tell him he is well meaning but really doesn't know shit about minefields
or
b.) shut up and listen to what he has to say, treading the path of thousands of others before you.
one way guarantees you safe passage, Why tread a new path?
drink the kool aid...drink long. drink deep.
Don't be a casualty.
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30 the Roll Nazi:
You might be wondering why the emphasis on posting first thing in your day? Remember that your roll post is a promise not to use nicotine for just one day.....also know that your addict mind is always trying to get a fix of nicotine. Your addict mind is an expert on rationalization....For example : "I didn't post roll yet, so I'm really not breaking a promise by having just one....I can just quit tomorrow again..." Shut the door on your addict mind- post up first thing.
The other aspect of posting roll early and every day is that it is an investment in your accountability...if I post whenever I feel like it, nobody is going to pay attention when I am missing, whereas if I post every morning, it is going to raise a warning when folks don't see my post by the afternoon. I want my inbox blown up by dinnertime if I don't post...don't you?
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Want vs Decision
So what happened to those that disappeared to never be heard from again? While we can't be sure of a cave, it is possible that they just didn't want this bad enough. For those of you who are left: How bad do you want to quit? Because your success is predicted with perfect accuracy from the true answer to that question. Most of my 33 years dipping I strongly "wanted" to quit. If quitting's a strong "want" in your life- you will fail. It may not be today, it may not be next week, you may make it to your HOF day and beyond, but eventually you will cave. For those of you in this category- no advice you receive is going to be effective over the long term until you decide to shut the door on nicotine. Until you make the decision that you will pursue a lifestyle of quit. Go look at the cancer pics, do some research on what big tobacco has done over the years to keep you as their Marionette....read about Tom and Jenny Kern. go over to whyquit.com and read some of the stories there. Do whatever it takes to get you to the point of closing the door on nicotine. While we can give advice on how to quit, we cannot close the door for you. That, dear reader, is up to you.
If you are truly sick of this stupid addiction, really sick of being the lackey of big tobacco, sick of worrying about cancer, sick of hiding your addiction from others, and you want this quit more than anything else..and you drink the KTC kool aid - you will succeed- guaranteed. The program is foolproof:
Post Roll
Honor your promise for today
Repeat
One last thing: Quitters find a way to quit. Caver's find a way to cave.
Be a quitter.
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No Reservations Allowed
I was talking to a friend of mine about his AA meeting...he was telling me that there were several types of people there: ..the hard nosed in your face types who know that one drink will never be permissible, then there are the quieter ones, who also know that alcohol is off limits forever... the ones that are there because they are quitting for someone else: for their spouse, or for the judge...and then you will find some that are quit for today..but they are not really sure if they are an alcoholic...That is what is known as having a reservation...they are not really sure that they are quit for good...The first two types are the ones most likely to be successful in building a lifetime of sobriety one day at a time...The rest...well the failure rate is off the charts....
Do YOU have any reservations? Is there a circumstance that would push you over the edge? Is there a crave that would get too strong? Is there a limit to what you would do to protect your quit?
To quote one badass quitter:
No more- not for any reason!
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There is never just one- by kcah
I am going to share my story of my first quit, take it for what you will.
After chewing for years while in the military, the day I got out I left the can behind. I had not been to the US in about 6 years and i was looking to settle down, i was going to be home every night, and I sure didnt need that habit. So I walked away. Didnt chew before the military, wasnt going to chew after.
Years went by, YEARS without chew, I never missed it.
One day a buddy from the military showed up with a can of chew, he had moved back to town. At first I was strong, but at some point, some point I don't even recall I took one from him. I dont know how long it was till I was buying my own cans again but it couldn't of been more than a week. This was about 7 or 8 years ago.
Since then I was back to a can a day habit until I found this website because my gums were so fucked up I couldn't take it anymore.
KC
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
M LooT's first post (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2420)
Tomorrow never comes (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2423)
11X4's Epiphany (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2430)
Loot on brotherhood (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2431)
MChewie on Cavers (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2433)
MTwo Wolves (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2453)
M Tools by WildBill (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2463)
Nicotine over Legs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2478)
Skoal Monster's letter to UST (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2592)
M What I know- by Skoal Monster (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2672)
An open letter to non-regular posters (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2691)
M Rick bender (http://www.journal-news.com/news/ohio-news/jawless-man-shares-dangers-of-tobacco-605250.html)
M How bad do you want to quit? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5420)
M Tough Love (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5401)
quitter vs stopper (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5350)
Mundeniable truth (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4938)
M Why not just one (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4814)
Every day I post roll (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4689)
M silly rabbits (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4566)
pickles vs cucumbers (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4512)
A welcome to the newbs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4402)
Nicotine over legs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4240)
There is no "just one" (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4172)
M What's the hardest thing you can do (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4130)
What are you willing to do to stay quit? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4037)
M Who does big tobacco think you are? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3919)
What you need to hear (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3861)
M A quit plan (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3846)
The caver (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3712)
I take them out all the time (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3516)
Mskoal monster's intro (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showuser=6412)
the decision to quit- by chewie (http://www.killthecan.org/facts/chewie01.asp)
M Tell your damn story (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5560)
M Gruen shares the cold, hard facts (http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=gruen+von+behrens+video&view=detail&mid=624CF722B83BCC19844A624CF722B83BCC19844A&first=0&FORM=LKVR2)
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-
Day 330
I look at the nic bitch at this point as a lion looking at a herd- she is waiting for someone to lag behind, waiting to pick the next one off, looking for a sign of weakness, looking for someone who is not thinking about the fact that they are still vulnerable. She is patient, In some cases she waits thousands of days to pick one off.
I'm stayin with the herd.
-
Day 330
I look at the nic bitch at this point as a lion looking at a herd- she is waiting for someone to lag behind, waiting to pick the next one off, looking for a sign of weakness, looking for someone who is not thinking about the fact that they are still vulnerable. She is patient, In some cases she waits thousands of days to pick one off.
I'm stayin with the herd.
Damn, that is a good observation.
-
Day 330
I look at the nic bitch at this point as a lion looking at a herd- she is waiting for someone to lag behind, waiting to pick the next one off, looking for a sign of weakness, looking for someone who is not thinking about the fact that they are still vulnerable. She is patient, In some cases she waits thousands of days to pick one off.
I'm stayin with the herd.
Damn, that is a good observation.
I'm a lemming.
-
Day 330
I look at the nic bitch at this point as a lion looking at a herd- she is waiting for someone to lag behind, waiting to pick the next one off, looking for a sign of weakness, looking for someone who is not thinking about the fact that they are still vulnerable. She is patient, In some cases she waits thousands of days to pick one off.
I'm stayin with the herd.
Damn, that is a good observation.
I'm a lemming.
X3
-
Day 361
I have spent the last 70 or so days in a VERY nice place in my quit. No craves, no funks, nada. It was a great ride. I say was, because yesterday and today I suddenly got a couple of intense, but short craves. The kind that make your mouth water. They didn't last for more than a couple of seconds, enough time for my rational brain to get good and PISSED at my addict brain.
I recognized those craves- they were the ones that sabotaged my every prior attempt to quit. There are differences this time, though
1. I posted roll. no way I am going back on my word
2. I recognize the lies of addiction- my addict brain would like me to think that the first dip would be that "nirvana dip"...the one that wouldn't end up with me gagging on my own cancer cocktail of dip and saliva. It's pure fantasy.
3. I know that this is a temporary phase, and that on the other side of this are many more days of freedom.
I can tell you that if I had stopped posting roll after the HOF there is no way I would have been as prepared to handle those craves. Perhaps they would have even done in my quit? Dunno...but I don't plan to take any chances... I think I'll follow this trip around the sun with another here with yall. That daily promise to you and reminder to me seem to make my quit bullet proof, so why mess with what works?
See you tomorrow at roll.
Dale
-
Thanks again for the overwhelming support. I am deeply moved by it.
My sister-in-law (the wife of one of my other brothers) has been my brother's caregiver for the duration of the illness, which became a full time job for the last 3 months of his life. She wanted to do it, she is one very special lady. I owe her a huge debt of gratitude. She spent her time over the last 3 months granting his every wish, making him as comfortable as possible, cleaning, feeding, taking care of all of his medical needs, running out for ice cream to make milkshakes that she knew he would only take 1 sip of, She is truly physically and mentally exhausted at this point. Yesterday she told me this:
One night Keith decided that he wanted to sit up and watch movies downstairs like he used to. So she virtually carried him downstairs (at this point he didn't weigh much) and sat him up on the couch. The next morning she came back and he was asleep, Tv on, cigarette in the ashtray. Even in the midst of the terrible illness, big tobacco still had him hooked for "one more". That is why there is no "one more" for me- or for you.
There is nothing that will make me go back to active addiction. Is it "hard" to quit and stay that way? Yes, bit it is a whole lot easier than the journey my brother was forced to go on for the last year and a half of his life.
Stay Quit
30
Just read part of the way back through this thread and had to stop and say,
"I am quit with you today 30"
-
365 Days
I met nicotine for the first time about 34 years ago, back on a little league field in a small rural town in upstate NY. Baseball and chewing tobacco, they went together like America and apple pie. At 10 , I really didn't think about the consequences of chewing. Many of my favorite baseball stars dipped, and I wanted to be just like them. Little did I know how much that cancer weed was going to take from me.
I continued to chew all through high school and into college. Circle in my pocket and bulged lower lip, dorm room and cars filled with spitters, those were the evidence of my stupidity. At some point I got tired of the grossed out looks, the spilled spitters and began to fear that I had already given myself cancer....but it was not enough.
I got married a couple of years later, and sired children. I continued to be sick of my addiction, and had 5 more reasons to give it up: My wife and four kids. What would they do if I died of cancer because of my stupidity? What if one of my children decided to start dipping because they wanted to be like me? I felt guilty about my failure to quit....but it was not enough.
As the years went by, I withdrew more and more from my family, I did not want my kids to know so I went “deep undercover” with my addiction. The time spent with them was always less enjoyable because I was always distracted by my need to sneak off and get my next “fix”. I started to become aware for the first time exactly how much dip was affecting me and all of those around me.....but it was not enough.
From the time that I was in college I tried to quit, I wanted to quit, I quit many times, sometimes for a day, sometimes a week, twice for over a month. I tried cold turkey, gum, using fake, hypnosis, weaning...some worked to get me to stop for a while but nothing worked to get me quit. Each time I tried and failed it plunged me deeper and deeper in defeat. Each time it took me longer and longer to try again. Even my fear of cancer drove me back to my addiction to cope with the stress of the fear of cancer....crazy. I was so sick of that vicious cycle: but it was not enough
A little over a year ago I had thoughts of trying to quit again. I typed “fake chew” into my browser and pressed enter. It brought me to the “smokeless alternatives” page on KTC. I read the reviews and settled on Hooch wintergreen. I put in my order and came back to the site and surfed a little bit. A couple of days later the Hooch came in the mail. I started thinking about KTC and figured going through this with others might help a little with my attempt to quit, so I posted an introduction and a day 1 in the May 2011 quit group. These strangers in cyberspace going on this journey with me. A couple of dozen veteran quitters were to be our guides. Quitters from all different groups added their support. Little did I know that these people were going to give me the wisdom, the support and strength to reclaim my life from the addiction that had plagued it for 34 years.
You see, I found this bunch of folks, who coached me, supported me, came up beside me, told me what I needed to hear, and simply got me to the point where I believed that it was in my power to make this my last quit. They held me accountable for my actions and thoughts, they pointed out where my thinking was weak.... That was what was missing all of these years: people who understood my addiction, and cared enough to tell me the truth and hold me accountable.
And that, my friends, was enough.
Thank You All.
Dale
-
Thank you Dale. You've been a sherpa for me the past year.
Congratulations brother. You are one heck of a guy.
-
A) Congrats on one year
B) Damn fine post, reading that really hit home and strengthened my quit today. The best thing about KTC is I know I am not alone, I could have written most of that about myself, for so long I thought I was unique in my feelings about my addiction and that made facing it a scarier proposition.
C) Thanks for your contribution to the site, it is leaders like you that keep this place the way it is!
-
A) Congrats on one year
B) Damn fine post, reading that really hit home and strengthened my quit today. The best thing about KTC is I know I am not alone, I could have written most of that about myself, for so long I thought I was unique in my feelings about my addiction and that made facing it a scarier proposition.
C) Thanks for your contribution to the site, it is leaders like you that keep this place the way it is!
and that smiley face is supposed to a "B" gosh I am bad with computers.
-
A) Congrats on one year
B)Â Damn fine post, reading that really hit home and strengthened my quit today. The best thing about KTC is I know I am not alone, I could have written most of that about myself, for so long I thought I was unique in my feelings about my addiction and that made facing it a scarier proposition.
C) Thanks for your contribution to the site, it is leaders like you that keep this place the way it is!
and that smiley face is supposed to a "B" gosh I am bad with computers.
Damn fine quit and Post 30.
-
A) Congrats on one year
B)Â Damn fine post, reading that really hit home and strengthened my quit today. The best thing about KTC is I know I am not alone, I could have written most of that about myself, for so long I thought I was unique in my feelings about my addiction and that made facing it a scarier proposition.
C) Thanks for your contribution to the site, it is leaders like you that keep this place the way it is!
and that smiley face is supposed to a "B" gosh I am bad with computers.
Damn fine quit and Post 30.
^^^ 'clap'
-
A) Congrats on one year
B)Â Damn fine post, reading that really hit home and strengthened my quit today. The best thing about KTC is I know I am not alone, I could have written most of that about myself, for so long I thought I was unique in my feelings about my addiction and that made facing it a scarier proposition.
C) Thanks for your contribution to the site, it is leaders like you that keep this place the way it is!
and that smiley face is supposed to a "B" gosh I am bad with computers.
Damn fine quit and Post 30.
^^^ 'clap'
30,
You inspire this whole site with your quit! Congrats Brother!
-
A) Congrats on one year
B)Â Damn fine post, reading that really hit home and strengthened my quit today. The best thing about KTC is I know I am not alone, I could have written most of that about myself, for so long I thought I was unique in my feelings about my addiction and that made facing it a scarier proposition.
C) Thanks for your contribution to the site, it is leaders like you that keep this place the way it is!
and that smiley face is supposed to a "B" gosh I am bad with computers.
Damn fine quit and Post 30.
^^^ 'clap'
30,
You inspire this whole site with your quit! Congrats Brother!
Congrats brother.
You earned your freedom.
Enjoy it, protect it as you have done and remain a free man.
P.S. It gets even better. I know, I know. You're thinking, how can that be. It just does.
Damn proud of you.
-
A) Congrats on one year
B)Â Damn fine post, reading that really hit home and strengthened my quit today. The best thing about KTC is I know I am not alone, I could have written most of that about myself, for so long I thought I was unique in my feelings about my addiction and that made facing it a scarier proposition.
C) Thanks for your contribution to the site, it is leaders like you that keep this place the way it is!
and that smiley face is supposed to a "B" gosh I am bad with computers.
Damn fine quit and Post 30.
^^^ 'clap'
30,
You inspire this whole site with your quit! Congrats Brother!
Congrats brother.
You earned your freedom.
Enjoy it, protect it as you have done and remain a free man.
P.S. It gets even better. I know, I know. You're thinking, how can that be. It just does.
Damn proud of you.
:)
-
Day 461
An open letter to the nic bitch.
you try to make me think I can have a chew once in a while....it's a lie. You are just trying to enslave me.
you try to make me think it would be so good, that it would feel so good - Here's the truth- the majority of times you made me gag rushing to spit- so I wouldn't puke.
you try to convince me that it would be so much fun to spend time with you- the truth is you robbed me of so much time over my life that I do not want to waste another minute
you try to make me think there is no way I can remain quit forever. I don't have to- I only have to stay quit today.
although you have tried over the last two weeks to convince me of these things.....
I am still done with you.
The door is shut.
And it's staying that way.
-
Well said---- We need to remind ourselves of what this addiction really is!
-
Day 461
An open letter to the nic bitch.
you try to make me think I can have a chew once in a while....it's a lie. You are just trying to enslave me.
you try to make me think it would be so good, that it would feel so good - Here's the truth- the majority of times you made me gag rushing to spit- so I wouldn't puke.
you try to convince me that it would be so much fun to spend time with you- the truth is you robbed me of so much time over my life that I do not want to waste another minute
you try to make me think there is no way I can remain quit forever. I don't have to- I only have to stay quit today.
although you have tried over the last two weeks to convince me of these things.....
I am still done with you.
The door is shut.
And it's staying that way.
Right on Dale.
Like my estranged ex-wife, the nic bitch is just some crazy witch pounding on the front door while I sit on the couch sipping my lemonade watching me some Swamp People.
-
30's quit resources
Complacency
Some of you might be at a stage where this quit is...dare I say it? Kinda EASY! You haven't been craving as much, hell sometimes you barely even think about dip. You might even be wondering why it took you so long to quit, as it really wasn't as hard as you thought...
I know I came to that stage about day 25 or so. Now the face of the enemy has changed. Your first days were sheer willpower, withdrawals, craves, reaching for a can that was no longer there...but now your enemy has a new name: COMPLACENCY....
The nic-bitch has been waiting for this point, waiting for the time you go out without your cell phone, waiting for the time you get drunk, or until you will listen to her little promptings that you can have "just one". Waiting until you know that you own this addiction, that no thought or planning is required to protect your quit. She's waiting to separate you from your support, get you distant from the herd so she can move in for the kill.
COMPLACENCY- This enemy you will battle for perhaps thousands of days, perhaps even for the rest of your life. I can tell you I would LOVE to forget about dip, love to forget about this stupid addiction, but I know I should not, that I cannot. You see, i have failed at quitting many times, I know what happens when I forget. To forget is to fail.
For that reason, you will see me posting roll tomorrow. It is how I have begun my day for the last 321 days in a row- a reminder that I am an addict, lest I forget.
–--------------------------------------------------------–----------------------------------------
A Word to the Retreads
I wanted to wait until all of the drama died down to have a word with you....
So you are back...and posting roll...Doing the things I would expect to see from someone who is serious about their quit...In addition to posting roll, I sure hope you are living, breathing, drinking the kool aid here.
You can believe 2 things about this place: It's nothing more than a tool to help you quit and the people here are just strangers in cyberspace........ or this is a place full of dead serious quitters intent on saving their own life and helping others save theirs.
In the short time I have been here, I have actually met several quitters, talked to some more on the phone, texted still others, and keep in contact with others through facebook, pm, and email. I have moved the KTC experience far beyond some self help website in cyberspace. I have no place to hide...In order to get away from these folks I would have to change my home number, email address, cell number, move (yes some of them know where I live), abandon my facebook account, and ask my kids and wife to abandon theirs.
In other words- this is my last quit- and I am all in. I have built my accountability to the point that there is no going back...no hedged bets, no retreat clause, no surrender.
My question for you is: Have you decided this is your last quit? Then box yourself in...build your accountability to the point there is no escape. Take every opportunity to be held accountable to other quitters. Stay in constant contact with people that will not tolerate addict thinking. In short put all your chips in the center of the table...go all in.
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Is Posting Roll Enough?
So you've got a handle on how the site works, right? Post roll, honor that promise, repeat...is that all it takes? Technically, yes that is all it takes- if you do those three things every day without fail, you will quit for the rest of your life one today at a time- except -it doesn't seem to play out that way for many folks....That program is the foundation, the cornerstone of the program here. It is the bare minimum. That's the problem right there- people who do the bare minimum for their quit tend not to stick with it over the long haul. I can tell these people right away- they are the ones that you almost never see here as they are only here long enough to post roll. Those are the folks that you have to PM and/or use multiple posts to get their attention, because they don't even take the time to scroll down to find out what happened to their quit brothers/sisters throughout the day....hell they don't even look over the roll they are posting in to see what others are going through. I am pretty convinced I could change the header to "December Druids in Favor of Clubbing Baby Seals to Death" and they would come in, hit the quote button post their roll and leave... These people contribute nothing to the site- they are just a name followed by a number. Just as they were on the site they tend to just fade away into oblivion...and when they are gone, nobody really notices...sometimes they come back and post a day 1...usually it doesn't matter though. Because they usually just do the same thing all over again....post roll, leave the site quickly, fade away....
Then there are those that "get it". Those that understand the more they have invested in their quit, the better. Those that post roll every day and then build on it with developing accountability by exchanging numbers, reading the treasure chest of knowledge that is found throughout the site, by stepping up an helping other quitters- those are the people who stay quit.
Is your quit worth more than the bare minimum? If it's not- I predict a cave in your future. Post Roll, Honor Your Promise, Repeat. Exchange Numbers, Read, Take the time to help quitters new and old. Invest in your quit.
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A Word to Those That Know More than the Vets
Imagine that you are standing in front of a minefield...on the other side of that minefield stands a soldier...not only has he walked that minefield safely, but he has guided thousands of others through that minefield safely as well.. He hails you from the other side and offers to guide you across safely...
do you:
a) tell him he is well meaning but really doesn't know shit about minefields
or
b.) shut up and listen to what he has to say, treading the path of thousands of others before you.
one way guarantees you safe passage, Why tread a new path?
drink the kool aid...drink long. drink deep.
Don't be a casualty.
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30 the Roll Nazi:
You might be wondering why the emphasis on posting first thing in your day? Remember that your roll post is a promise not to use nicotine for just one day.....also know that your addict mind is always trying to get a fix of nicotine. Your addict mind is an expert on rationalization....For example : "I didn't post roll yet, so I'm really not breaking a promise by having just one....I can just quit tomorrow again..." Shut the door on your addict mind- post up first thing.
The other aspect of posting roll early and every day is that it is an investment in your accountability...if I post whenever I feel like it, nobody is going to pay attention when I am missing, whereas if I post every morning, it is going to raise a warning when folks don't see my post by the afternoon. I want my inbox blown up by dinnertime if I don't post...don't you?
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Want vs Decision
So what happened to those that disappeared to never be heard from again? While we can't be sure of a cave, it is possible that they just didn't want this bad enough. For those of you who are left: How bad do you want to quit? Because your success is predicted with perfect accuracy from the true answer to that question. Most of my 33 years dipping I strongly "wanted" to quit. If quitting's a strong "want" in your life- you will fail. It may not be today, it may not be next week, you may make it to your HOF day and beyond, but eventually you will cave. For those of you in this category- no advice you receive is going to be effective over the long term until you decide to shut the door on nicotine. Until you make the decision that you will pursue a lifestyle of quit. Go look at the cancer pics, do some research on what big tobacco has done over the years to keep you as their Marionette....read about Tom and Jenny Kern. go over to whyquit.com and read some of the stories there. Do whatever it takes to get you to the point of closing the door on nicotine. While we can give advice on how to quit, we cannot close the door for you. That, dear reader, is up to you.
If you are truly sick of this stupid addiction, really sick of being the lackey of big tobacco, sick of worrying about cancer, sick of hiding your addiction from others, and you want this quit more than anything else..and you drink the KTC kool aid - you will succeed- guaranteed. The program is foolproof:
Post Roll
Honor your promise for today
Repeat
One last thing: Quitters find a way to quit. Caver's find a way to cave.
Be a quitter.
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No Reservations Allowed
I was talking to a friend of mine about his AA meeting...he was telling me that there were several types of people there: ..the hard nosed in your face types who know that one drink will never be permissible, then there are the quieter ones, who also know that alcohol is off limits forever... the ones that are there because they are quitting for someone else: for their spouse, or for the judge...and then you will find some that are quit for today..but they are not really sure if they are an alcoholic...That is what is known as having a reservation...they are not really sure that they are quit for good...The first two types are the ones most likely to be successful in building a lifetime of sobriety one day at a time...The rest...well the failure rate is off the charts....
Do YOU have any reservations? Is there a circumstance that would push you over the edge? Is there a crave that would get too strong? Is there a limit to what you would do to protect your quit?
Know for sure that you are an addict. Know that "just one" will lead you back into the abyss of active addiction. Time to cancel your reservations and fly first class with your quit.
To quote one badass quitter:
No more- not for any reason!
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no.
The word is NO.
It is THE word that will keep you quit.
NO I will not back down.
NO I will not sacrifice my dignity to grovel at the feet of nicotine.
NO I will not give up my freedom in exchange for slavery.
NO I will not sacrifice my integrity for the empty promise that is a crave.
NO I will not enrich the coffers of those whose wealth is built on the misery of others.
NO I will not let my family down
NO I will not contribute to my own early demise today.
HELL NO I will not ingest nicotine today.
Advice is here, Support is here. An ass kicking when necessary is here. The fortitude to say NO is up to you.
___________________________________________________________________________________
Success does not take by surprise those that plan for it.
Posting your promise first thing is the first step in your plan. That promise tells me that you are committed to success right from jump street. It tells me your quit is the first thing on your mind - and it needs to be. After all, your addiction required your full attention when you were using. You would drive MILES in the middle of the night if you ran out. You would sneak out of family gatherings multiple times, make excuses to go to the store, take your time getting home....(insert what you did to feed your addiction here: ________ .) In other words, your mind was always planning ways to feed your addiction. It's time to retrain your mind to plan ways to feed your quit. To that end, posting roll first thing and making some time to be on the site seem like such minor things, no? A successful quit requires a plan for success. What's yours?
________________________________________________________________________________________
Tips for below the line
1. Some will leave no matter what you do. Make them tell you they are not going to post roll with you anymore.... reason with them, do your best. If they refuse to listen to reason, you have done your part... you may very well see them back someday, redfaced with hat in hand, posting a day 1.
2. Some will slowly drift... starts out with a couple of days here and there... if they get no text from anyone...it will get longer. Most of these you can save, as they will stay as long as they know that they are missed when they are not on rollcall.
3. Find a way to keep the chatter up, maybe post a question of the day, post silly shit on roll call. Text each other, CALL each other. Trade emails. Make this into a tight knit village.
4. Get involved with the newer quit groups, adopt some newbs, invite them to post in here.
5. Don't base your group on any other. Resolve to defy statistics. Make it happen. May 2011 has the same 17 quitters posting Roll that they had 1 year ago. That's 50% of our HOF class as we approach 700 days. I personally think the same 17 will be posting with us a year from now.
For the drifters: The nic bitch is watching you the way a lion watches a herd. Waiting for you to get separated from your support, waiting for you to get distracted, waiting for you to forget that she is there. Waiting for you to get careless. She will devour you if she can.
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There is never just one- by kcah
I am going to share my story of my first quit, take it for what you will.
After chewing for years while in the military, the day I got out I left the can behind. I had not been to the US in about 6 years and i was looking to settle down, i was going to be home every night, and I sure didnt need that habit. So I walked away. Didnt chew before the military, wasnt going to chew after.
Years went by, YEARS without chew, I never missed it.
One day a buddy from the military showed up with a can of chew, he had moved back to town. At first I was strong, but at some point, some point I don't even recall I took one from him. I dont know how long it was till I was buying my own cans again but it couldn't of been more than a week. This was about 7 or 8 years ago.
Since then I was back to a can a day habit until I found this website because my gums were so fucked up I couldn't take it anymore.
KC
_______________________________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________________________
M LooT's first post (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2420)
Tomorrow never comes (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2423)
11X4's Epiphany (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2430)
Loot on brotherhood (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2431)
MChewie on Cavers (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2433)
MTwo Wolves (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2453)
M Tools by WildBill (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2463)
Nicotine over Legs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2478)
Skoal Monster's letter to UST (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2592)
M What I know- by Skoal Monster (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2672)
An open letter to non-regular posters (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2691)
M Rick bender (http://www.journal-news.com/news/ohio-news/jawless-man-shares-dangers-of-tobacco-605250.html)
M How bad do you want to quit? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5420)
M Tough Love (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5401)
quitter vs stopper (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5350)
Mundeniable truth (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4938)
M Why not just one (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4814)
Every day I post roll (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4689)
M silly rabbits (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4566)
pickles vs cucumbers (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4512)
A welcome to the newbs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4402)
Nicotine over legs (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4240)
There is no "just one" (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4172)
M What's the hardest thing you can do (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4130)
What are you willing to do to stay quit? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4037)
M Who does big tobacco think you are? (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3919)
What you need to hear (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3861)
M A quit plan (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3846)
The caver (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3712)
I take them out all the time (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=3516)
Mskoal monster's intro (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showuser=6412)
the decision to quit- by chewie (http://www.killthecan.org/facts/chewie01.asp)
M Tell your damn story (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=5560)
M Gruen shares the cold, hard facts (http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=gruen+von+behrens+video&view=detail&mid=624CF722B83BCC19844A624CF722B83BCC19844A&first=0&FORM=LKVR2)
When to leave KTC (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=2450) by chewie
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-
Be sure to visit the WELCOME CENTER (http://www.killthecan.org/community/welcome.asp) for what you need to know to get started. Learn why we post roll. Learn how to post roll.
Stop by Introductions (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showforum=25) and tell us something about yourself
For inspiration stop by Words of Wisdom (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showforum=41) and HOF Speeches (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showforum=9)
What to expect when you quit is found here (http://www.killthecan.org/yourquit/what.asp) and here (http://www.killthecan.org/yourquit/symptoms.asp)
Read about Tom and Jenny Kern (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6800), Randy (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6786&st=0#entry22177898), and watch the story of Sean Marsee (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDFNqOuZ3II) as told by his brother.
Print out the Contract to Give Up (http://www.killthecan.org/facts/contract.asp). Carry it around with you and commit to signing it before taking another dip.
Finally, in the upper right corner of the screen, you'll see a link for LIVE CHAT (http://chat.killthecan.org/). This can be a life saver when you're craving, bored, frustrated, whatever. Jump in to Chat and get live support.
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365 Days
I met nicotine for the first time about 34 years ago, back on a little league field in a small rural town in upstate NY. Baseball and chewing tobacco, they went together like America and apple pie. At 10 , I really didn't think about the consequences of chewing. Many of my favorite baseball stars dipped, and I wanted to be just like them. Little did I know how much that cancer weed was going to take from me.
I continued to chew all through high school and into college. Circle in my pocket and bulged lower lip, dorm room and cars filled with spitters, those were the evidence of my stupidity. At some point I got tired of the grossed out looks, the spilled spitters and began to fear that I had already given myself cancer....but it was not enough.
I got married a couple of years later, and sired children. I continued to be sick of my addiction, and had 5 more reasons to give it up: My wife and four kids. What would they do if I died of cancer because of my stupidity? What if one of my children decided to start dipping because they wanted to be like me? I felt guilty about my failure to quit....but it was not enough.
As the years went by, I withdrew more and more from my family, I did not want my kids to know so I went “deep undercover” with my addiction. The time spent with them was always less enjoyable because I was always distracted by my need to sneak off and get my next “fix”. I started to become aware for the first time exactly how much dip was affecting me and all of those around me.....but it was not enough.
From the time that I was in college I tried to quit, I wanted to quit, I quit many times, sometimes for a day, sometimes a week, twice for over a month. I tried cold turkey, gum, using fake, hypnosis, weaning...some worked to get me to stop for a while but nothing worked to get me quit. Each time I tried and failed it plunged me deeper and deeper in defeat. Each time it took me longer and longer to try again. Even my fear of cancer drove me back to my addiction to cope with the stress of the fear of cancer....crazy. I was so sick of that vicious cycle: but it was not enough
A little over a year ago I had thoughts of trying to quit again. I typed “fake chew” into my browser and pressed enter. It brought me to the “smokeless alternatives” page on KTC. I read the reviews and settled on Hooch wintergreen. I put in my order and came back to the site and surfed a little bit. A couple of days later the Hooch came in the mail. I started thinking about KTC and figured going through this with others might help a little with my attempt to quit, so I posted an introduction and a day 1 in the May 2011 quit group. These strangers in cyberspace going on this journey with me. A couple of dozen veteran quitters were to be our guides. Quitters from all different groups added their support. Little did I know that these people were going to give me the wisdom, the support and strength to reclaim my life from the addiction that had plagued it for 34 years.
You see, I found this bunch of folks, who coached me, supported me, came up beside me, told me what I needed to hear, and simply got me to the point where I believed that it was in my power to make this my last quit. They held me accountable for my actions and thoughts, they pointed out where my thinking was weak.... That was what was missing all of these years: people who understood my addiction, and cared enough to tell me the truth and hold me accountable.
And that, my friends, was enough.
Thank You All.
Dale
Thank You 30 - I am v gratefull I have found this site and you guys share as you do.
I copied your peice above as that is where I have been in my addiction...'Deep undercover' , especially at home. Truth is, my family knew I was chewing like a madman, but I thought I had outsmarted em all...no so undercover afterall...
Once again, I am thankful go like you and the rest post. It is helping me save what ass I have left.
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If chewing is interfering with your family and work, you're probably a heavy chewer. If your family and work is interfering with your chewing, you're an addict.
Such is the case for me.
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If chewing is interfering with your family and work, you're probably a heavy chewer. If your family and work is interfering with your chewing, you're an addict.
Such is the case for me.
tinman,
You are on the right path, keep reading everything you can here.
One truth about nicotine is that there is no such thing as controlled use. Nicotine always OWNS the user. Each one of us is the same: an addict. A heavy dipper is always an addict. A light dipper is always an addict. If we ever forget that, the slide back to ACTIVE addiction begins.
I quit with you today.
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Just some unfinished random musings about the past 2-3 weeks in KTC land........
The past 2-3 weeks have seen some quitters come back and post up day 1's, quitters that were well past the HOF when they caved. A couple of them drifted, a couple just suddenly threw their quits away. Posting every day and suddenly, out of nowhere- a cave.
Well perhaps not "out of nowhere". We talk quite a bit about the "planned cave" here. But is their really a difference between someone who decides not to use their tools and chooses to cave suddenly and someone who drifts and then caves? Surely being here for over 100 days would expose someone to enough cave stories to know the inherent risks of drifting away from the site? Surely being here for that long would equip them enough to know that they have options when they are weak? Did all of the numbers somehow get wiped off of their phone? Did they forget how to google "KTC" to find this site again? Why did they ignore the countless stories of people drifting and then coming back with a day 1? Were they all so arrogant as to think they were special, that they were immune to what had overtaken so many? Or deep down was it their addict brain hatching a plan to fail? The first step being the separation from everyone who held them accountable?
Is there any such thing as an "unplanned cave"? I am inclined to say no. It's just a matter of how long it's been planned.
-
Just some unfinished random musings about the past 2-3 weeks in KTC land........
The past 2-3 weeks have seen some quitters come back and post up day 1's, quitters that were well past the HOF when they caved. A couple of them drifted, a couple just suddenly threw their quits away. Posting every day and suddenly, out of nowhere- a cave.
Well perhaps not "out of nowhere". We talk quite a bit about the "planned cave" here. But is their really a difference between someone who decides not to use their tools and chooses to cave suddenly and someone who drifts and then caves? Surely being here for over 100 days would expose someone to enough cave stories to know the inherent risks of drifting away from the site? Surely being here for that long would equip them enough to know that they have options when they are weak? Did all of the numbers somehow get wiped off of their phone? Did they forget how to google "KTC" to find this site again? Why did they ignore the countless stories of people drifting and then coming back with a day 1? Were they all so arrogant as to think they were special, that they were immune to what had overtaken so many? Or deep down was it their addict brain hatching a plan to fail? The first step being the separation from everyone who held them accountable?
Is there any such thing as an "unplanned cave"? I am inclined to say no. It's just a matter of how long it's been planned.
i understand this sentiment. but i can say with certainty that there is such a thing as an unplanned cave. i never planned it. i guess it was planned for the 4 minutes before i made the wrong choice. but it wasn't a long-term planned cave. i didn't leave the site expecting to cave. i left the site because it made me think of dip every fucking day and i was already quit, dammit. perhaps unconsciously there was always the planned cave in the back of my mind? but i never knew it... so is that planned?
you're right 30 - i was arrogant. i was strong. i won't say i was "special" because i don't want scowick calling me a butterfly. i was "different." i could swing one dip. man i was wrong. i was 411 days in and i was just so goddam wrong. my last post was at 366 and i was convinced i beat it. i've lost friends over those two weeks. i've been back for 10 days now and i still don't feel back. i'm quit as fuck. but i don't feel back. i can't voice my opinion or call people on shit or have a collossal set of balls... because i'm a retread. retreads don't get a second chance. we're allowed to come back - but we don't get a second chance to be a "voice." and that sucks more than anything. i love this site. i didn't realize how much until i left. check that - until i came back.
if you're out there planning an unplanned cave - don't do it. for the love of everything you hold dear, don't do it. you will never feel the same as you do today - even if you cave and come back. you'll never get the feeling you have today back.
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Just some unfinished random musings about the past 2-3 weeks in KTC land........
The past 2-3 weeks have seen some quitters come back and post up day 1's, quitters that were well past the HOF when they caved. A couple of them drifted, a couple just suddenly threw their quits away. Posting every day and suddenly, out of nowhere- a cave.
Well perhaps not "out of nowhere". We talk quite a bit about the "planned cave" here. But is their really a difference between someone who decides not to use their tools and chooses to cave suddenly and someone who drifts and then caves? Surely being here for over 100 days would expose someone to enough cave stories to know the inherent risks of drifting away from the site? Surely being here for that long would equip them enough to know that they have options when they are weak? Did all of the numbers somehow get wiped off of their phone? Did they forget how to google "KTC" to find this site again? Why did they ignore the countless stories of people drifting and then coming back with a day 1? Were they all so arrogant as to think they were special, that they were immune to what had overtaken so many? Or deep down was it their addict brain hatching a plan to fail? The first step being the separation from everyone who held them accountable?
Is there any such thing as an "unplanned cave"? I am inclined to say no. It's just a matter of how long it's been planned.
i understand this sentiment. but i can say with certainty that there is such a thing as an unplanned cave. i never planned it. i guess it was planned for the 4 minutes before i made the wrong choice. but it wasn't a long-term planned cave. i didn't leave the site expecting to cave. i left the site because it made me think of dip every fucking day and i was already quit, dammit. perhaps unconsciously there was always the planned cave in the back of my mind? but i never knew it... so is that planned?
you're right 30 - i was arrogant. i was strong. i won't say i was "special" because i don't want scowick calling me a butterfly. i was "different." i could swing one dip. man i was wrong. i was 411 days in and i was just so goddam wrong. my last post was at 366 and i was convinced i beat it. i've lost friends over those two weeks. i've been back for 10 days now and i still don't feel back. i'm quit as fuck. but i don't feel back. i can't voice my opinion or call people on shit or have a collossal set of balls... because i'm a retread. retreads don't get a second chance. we're allowed to come back - but we don't get a second chance to be a "voice." and that sucks more than anything. i love this site. i didn't realize how much until i left. check that - until i came back.
if you're out there planning an unplanned cave - don't do it. for the love of everything you hold dear, don't do it. you will never feel the same as you do today - even if you cave and come back. you'll never get the feeling you have today back.
Horseshit! Quit feeling sorry for yourself. Wastepanel is one of the finest "voices" on here, he is a leader, and incredibly important member of this community. CNC and others are the same way, they might be retreads but they are damn fine "voices", leaders and quitters I look up to and quit proudly with. I know you have that in you, I've seen it, and I expect it from you again. You should learn from your mistakes and teach others, I know you can and I know you will.
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Just some unfinished random musings about the past 2-3 weeks in KTC land........
The past 2-3 weeks have seen some quitters come back and post up day 1's, quitters that were well past the HOF when they caved. A couple of them drifted, a couple just suddenly threw their quits away. Posting every day and suddenly, out of nowhere- a cave.
Well perhaps not "out of nowhere". We talk quite a bit about the "planned cave" here. But is their really a difference between someone who decides not to use their tools and chooses to cave suddenly and someone who drifts and then caves? Surely being here for over 100 days would expose someone to enough cave stories to know the inherent risks of drifting away from the site?  Surely being here for that long would equip them enough to know that they have options when they are weak? Did all of the numbers somehow get wiped off of their phone? Did they forget how to google "KTC" to find this site again? Why did they ignore the countless stories of people drifting and then coming back with a day 1? Were they all so arrogant as to think they were special, that they were immune to what had overtaken so many? Or deep down was it their addict brain hatching a plan to fail? The first step being the separation from everyone who held them accountable?
Is there any such thing as an "unplanned cave"? I am inclined to say no. It's just a matter of how long it's been planned.
i understand this sentiment. but i can say with certainty that there is such a thing as an unplanned cave. i never planned it. i guess it was planned for the 4 minutes before i made the wrong choice. but it wasn't a long-term planned cave. i didn't leave the site expecting to cave. i left the site because it made me think of dip every fucking day and i was already quit, dammit. perhaps unconsciously there was always the planned cave in the back of my mind? but i never knew it... so is that planned?
you're right 30 - i was arrogant. i was strong. i won't say i was "special" because i don't want scowick calling me a butterfly. i was "different." i could swing one dip. man i was wrong. i was 411 days in and i was just so goddam wrong. my last post was at 366 and i was convinced i beat it. i've lost friends over those two weeks. i've been back for 10 days now and i still don't feel back. i'm quit as fuck. but i don't feel back. i can't voice my opinion or call people on shit or have a collossal set of balls... because i'm a retread. retreads don't get a second chance. we're allowed to come back - but we don't get a second chance to be a "voice." and that sucks more than anything. i love this site. i didn't realize how much until i left. check that - until i came back.
if you're out there planning an unplanned cave - don't do it. for the love of everything you hold dear, don't do it. you will never feel the same as you do today - even if you cave and come back. you'll never get the feeling you have today back.
Horseshit! Quit feeling sorry for yourself. Wastepanel is one of the finest "voices" on here, he is a leader, and incredibly important member of this community. CNC and others are the same way, they might be retreads but they are damn fine "voices", leaders and quitters I look up to and quit proudly with. I know you have that in you, I've seen it, and I expect it from you again. You should learn from your mistakes and teach others, I know you can and I know you will.
Per,
That post was not to rub salt in your wounds- it's to give you food for thought. I agree with luby, As the days go by, your voice will come back. Right now your daily post is your voice- it's your chance to say "I'm back, and I'm quit". . As far as the site "making you think about dip"- nearly every person that drifts gives that as their reason. You are not a special butterfly when it comes to this addiction. Whatever it is that you are going through, whatever it is that you are thinking- others have been there before you, and rest assured others will travel down that same path in the future.
psst. gonna tell you a little secret. Something happened to me mentally after I hit the one year mark. I don't know if it was kind of a "mental milestone" for me or not, but I had to FIGHT the urge to drift. Lost my passion for being here for a little while. It's gonna happen to you again, too. Prolly happen to me again. We are both going to have to FIGHT that urge. Just like anyone else with time here. The next time you are feeling that way- know that following this urge is to drift backward into the abyss. I know you know that now, but the trick is to know it each and every day you put your name and number on the line.
Don't forget about your cave, but do not let it defeat you, either. Let it be THE lesson that makes your quit impenetrable.
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Bump cause 30 rules.
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So, I am really trying to figure this out.... When someone drifts, thinking that their quit is under control, they don't heed the warnings that are all over the site. To me, it's not a smart decision, and it is rather reckless, but I suppose I can understand just a little how one could drift. As I mentioned in a post below, I had to fight the urge to drift myself.
But what I just cannot get my brain around is people who drift with many days quit, cave, come back make it to the HOF again, and then drift AGAIN.
If you know someone like that, take a minute to contact them and tell them what a dumbass they are.... or just encourage them to make their way back.
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So, I am really trying to figure this out.... When someone drifts, thinking that their quit is under control, they don't heed the warnings that are all over the site. To me, it's not a smart decision, and it is rather reckless, but I suppose I can understand just a little how one could drift. As I mentioned in a post below, I had to fight the urge to drift myself.
But what I just cannot get my brain around is people who drift with many days quit, cave, come back make it to the HOF again, and then drift AGAIN.
If you know someone like that, take a minute to contact them and tell them what a dumbass they are.... or just encourage them to make their way back.
Double drifter = dumbass. Word.
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So, I am really trying to figure this out.... When someone drifts, thinking that their quit is under control, they don't heed the warnings that are all over the site. To me, it's not a smart decision, and it is rather reckless, but I suppose I can understand just a little how one could drift. As I mentioned in a post below, I had to fight the urge to drift myself.
But what I just cannot get my brain around is people who drift with many days quit, cave, come back make it to the HOF again, and then drift AGAIN.
If you know someone like that, take a minute to contact them and tell them what a dumbass they are.... or just encourage them to make their way back.
Double drifter = dumbass. Word.
funny, i just PM'd sloop who has drifted. not sure if he technically "drifted" the first time, but he got complacent and thought he had the nic bitch by the cunt-hairs. this has been a major drift for him, though. 30+ days. i'm embarrassed to say that i just noticed.
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Day 668
I was saddened to learn that a guy that I grew up with passed away last night, He was 46, one year older than I am. He left a wife and two children. He predeceased his own mother and father. Cause of death was officially a heart attack, although I am quite sure the 6 or so year battle with throat cancer and the associated chemo, operations, and radiation were the major cause.
Our paths to addiction ran parallel: We both started to use dip at about the same time.... about 10 years old or thereabouts. We both dipped in sports, at boy scouts, at our respective Jobs (even those were similar- both of us worked for utility companies. There was a difference of when we quit, however.... As far as I know, he quit chewing about 6 years ago, when he was diagnosed with Throat Cancer. I Continued to dip another 4 years. For him, his quit came to late. For me, time will tell.
This hits close to home, really close. It could have just as easily have been my family making funeral arrangements. It could have been my kids with tears in their eyes... It could have been my wife, left alone by my singularly selfish addiction. It could have been my father, burying a second son in less than a year.
I cannot take back 33 years of nicotine use. I cannot go back and time and quit 10, 20, 30 years ago. What I can do is Today. All the bickering, all the drama, and fighting, they don't matter. What matters is that I am quit today.
Never Again.
-
Day 668
I was saddened to learn that a guy that I grew up with passed away last night, He was 46, one year older than I am. He left a wife and two children. He predeceased his own mother and father. Cause of death was officially a heart attack, although I am quite sure the 6 or so year battle with throat cancer and the associated chemo, operations, and radiation were the major cause.
Our paths to addiction ran parallel: We both started to use dip at about the same time.... about 10 years old or thereabouts. We both dipped in sports, at boy scouts, at our respective Jobs (even those were similar- both of us worked for utility companies. There was a difference of when we quit, however.... As far as I know, he quit chewing about 6 years ago, when he was diagnosed with Throat Cancer. I Continued to dip another 4 years. For him, his quit came to late. For me, time will tell.
This hits close to home, really close. It could have just as easily have been my family making funeral arrangements. It could have been my kids with tears in their eyes... It could have been my wife, left alone by my singularly selfish addiction. It could have been my father, burying a second son in less than a year. Sobering, to say the least.
Never Again.
I am sorry for your loss. Prayers for his family.
-
Day 668
I was saddened to learn that a guy that I grew up with passed away last night, He was 46, one year older than I am. He left a wife and two children. He predeceased his own mother and father. Cause of death was officially a heart attack, although I am quite sure the 6 or so year battle with throat cancer and the associated chemo, operations, and radiation were the major cause.
Our paths to addiction ran parallel: We both started to use dip at about the same time.... about 10 years old or thereabouts. We both dipped in sports, at boy scouts, at our respective Jobs (even those were similar- both of us worked for utility companies. There was a difference of when we quit, however.... As far as I know, he quit chewing about 6 years ago, when he was diagnosed with Throat Cancer. I Continued to dip another 4 years. For him, his quit came to late. For me, time will tell.
This hits close to home, really close. It could have just as easily have been my family making funeral arrangements. It could have been my kids with tears in their eyes... It could have been my wife, left alone by my singularly selfish addiction. It could have been my father, burying a second son in less than a year. Sobering, to say the least.
Never Again.
I am sorry for your loss. Prayers for his family.
Sorry about you loss. Prayers go out.
-
Day 668
I was saddened to learn that a guy that I grew up with passed away last night, He was 46, one year older than I am. He left a wife and two children. He predeceased his own mother and father. Cause of death was officially a heart attack, although I am quite sure the 6 or so year battle with throat cancer and the associated chemo, operations, and radiation were the major cause.
Our paths to addiction ran parallel: We both started to use dip at about the same time.... about 10 years old or thereabouts. We both dipped in sports, at boy scouts, at our respective Jobs (even those were similar- both of us worked for utility companies. There was a difference of when we quit, however.... As far as I know, he quit chewing about 6 years ago, when he was diagnosed with Throat Cancer. I Continued to dip another 4 years. For him, his quit came to late. For me, time will tell.
This hits close to home, really close. It could have just as easily have been my family making funeral arrangements. It could have been my kids with tears in their eyes... It could have been my wife, left alone by my singularly selfish addiction. It could have been my father, burying a second son in less than a year. Sobering, to say the least.
Never Again.
I am sorry for your loss. Prayers for his family.
Sorry about you loss. Prayers go out.
So sorry to hear about your friends' suffering and your loss.
-
Day 668
I was saddened to learn that a guy that I grew up with passed away last night, He was 46, one year older than I am. He left a wife and two children. He predeceased his own mother and father. Cause of death was officially a heart attack, although I am quite sure the 6 or so year battle with throat cancer and the associated chemo, operations, and radiation were the major cause.
Our paths to addiction ran parallel: We both started to use dip at about the same time.... about 10 years old or thereabouts. We both dipped in sports, at boy scouts, at our respective Jobs (even those were similar- both of us worked for utility companies. There was a difference of when we quit, however.... As far as I know, he quit chewing about 6 years ago, when he was diagnosed with Throat Cancer. I Continued to dip another 4 years. For him, his quit came to late. For me, time will tell.
This hits close to home, really close. It could have just as easily have been my family making funeral arrangements. It could have been my kids with tears in their eyes... It could have been my wife, left alone by my singularly selfish addiction. It could have been my father, burying a second son in less than a year. Sobering, to say the least.
Never Again.
I am sorry for your loss. Prayers for his family.
Sorry about you loss. Prayers go out.
So sorry to hear about your friends' suffering and your loss.
Very sorry for your loss brother....
-
Day 668
I was saddened to learn that a guy that I grew up with passed away last night, He was 46, one year older than I am. He left a wife and two children. He predeceased his own mother and father. Cause of death was officially a heart attack, although I am quite sure the 6 or so year battle with throat cancer and the associated chemo, operations, and radiation were the major cause.
Our paths to addiction ran parallel: We both started to use dip at about the same time.... about 10 years old or thereabouts. We both dipped in sports, at boy scouts, at our respective Jobs (even those were similar- both of us worked for utility companies. There was a difference of when we quit, however.... As far as I know, he quit chewing about 6 years ago, when he was diagnosed with Throat Cancer. I Continued to dip another 4 years. For him, his quit came to late. For me, time will tell.
This hits close to home, really close. It could have just as easily have been my family making funeral arrangements. It could have been my kids with tears in their eyes... It could have been my wife, left alone by my singularly selfish addiction. It could have been my father, burying a second son in less than a year. Sobering, to say the least.
Never Again.
I am sorry for your loss. Prayers for his family.
Sorry about you loss. Prayers go out.
So sorry to hear about your friends' suffering and your loss.
Very sorry for your loss brother....
Will pray for all of you.. so sorry about your friend.
-
Thanks again for the overwhelming support. I am deeply moved by it.
My sister-in-law (the wife of one of my other brothers) has been my brother's caregiver for the duration of the illness, which became a full time job for the last 3 months of his life. She wanted to do it, she is one very special lady. I owe her a huge debt of gratitude. She spent her time over the last 3 months granting his every wish, making him as comfortable as possible, cleaning, feeding, taking care of all of his medical needs, running out for ice cream to make milkshakes that she knew he would only take 1 sip of, She is truly physically and mentally exhausted at this point. Yesterday she told me this:
One night Keith decided that he wanted to sit up and watch movies downstairs like he used to. So she virtually carried him downstairs (at this point he didn't weigh much) and sat him up on the couch. The next morning she came back and he was asleep, Tv on, cigarette in the ashtray. Even in the midst of the terrible illness, big tobacco still had him hooked for "one more". That is why there is no "one more" for me- or for you.
There is nothing that will make me go back to active addiction. Is it "hard" to quit and stay that way? Yes, bit it is a whole lot easier than the journey my brother was forced to go on for the last year and a half of his life.
Stay Quit
30
1 year ago today....Rest in Peace, Keith. Thinking of you today.
Another one of the countless victims of nicotine addiction.
Never Again. For Any Reason.
-
Thanks again for the overwhelming support. I am deeply moved by it.
My sister-in-law (the wife of one of my other brothers) has been my brother's caregiver for the duration of the illness, which became a full time job for the last 3 months of his life. She wanted to do it, she is one very special lady. I owe her a huge debt of gratitude. She spent her time over the last 3 months granting his every wish, making him as comfortable as possible, cleaning, feeding, taking care of all of his medical needs, running out for ice cream to make milkshakes that she knew he would only take 1 sip of, She is truly physically and mentally exhausted at this point. Yesterday she told me this:
One night Keith decided that he wanted to sit up and watch movies downstairs like he used to. So she virtually carried him downstairs (at this point he didn't weigh much) and sat him up on the couch. The next morning she came back and he was asleep, Tv on, cigarette in the ashtray. Even in the midst of the terrible illness, big tobacco still had him hooked for "one more". That is why there is no "one more" for me- or for you.
There is nothing that will make me go back to active addiction. Is it "hard" to quit and stay that way? Yes, bit it is a whole lot easier than the journey my brother was forced to go on for the last year and a half of his life.
Stay Quit
30
1 year ago today....Rest in Peace, Keith. Thinking of you today.
Another one of the countless victims of nicotine addiction.
Never Again. For Any Reason.
Prayers and thoughts with you 30.
I'm with You, never again for any reason.
-
Thanks again for the overwhelming support. I am deeply moved by it.
My sister-in-law (the wife of one of my other brothers) has been my brother's caregiver for the duration of the illness, which became a full time job for the last 3 months of his life. She wanted to do it, she is one very special lady. I owe her a huge debt of gratitude. She spent her time over the last 3 months granting his every wish, making him as comfortable as possible, cleaning, feeding, taking care of all of his medical needs, running out for ice cream to make milkshakes that she knew he would only take 1 sip of, She is truly physically and mentally exhausted at this point. Yesterday she told me this:
One night Keith decided that he wanted to sit up and watch movies downstairs like he used to. So she virtually carried him downstairs (at this point he didn't weigh much) and sat him up on the couch. The next morning she came back and he was asleep, Tv on, cigarette in the ashtray. Even in the midst of the terrible illness, big tobacco still had him hooked for "one more". That is why there is no "one more" for me- or for you.
There is nothing that will make me go back to active addiction. Is it "hard" to quit and stay that way? Yes, bit it is a whole lot easier than the journey my brother was forced to go on for the last year and a half of his life.
Stay Quit
30
1 year ago today....Rest in Peace, Keith. Thinking of you today.
Another one of the countless victims of nicotine addiction.
Never Again. For Any Reason.
Prayers and thoughts with you 30.
I'm with You, never again for any reason.
Watched and lived the same thing with my father. This addiction is a wicked bitch, proud to be clean with you !!
-
Thanks again for the overwhelming support. I am deeply moved by it.
My sister-in-law (the wife of one of my other brothers) has been my brother's caregiver for the duration of the illness, which became a full time job for the last 3 months of his life. She wanted to do it, she is one very special lady. I owe her a huge debt of gratitude. She spent her time over the last 3 months granting his every wish, making him as comfortable as possible, cleaning, feeding, taking care of all of his medical needs, running out for ice cream to make milkshakes that she knew he would only take 1 sip of, She is truly physically and mentally exhausted at this point. Yesterday she told me this:
One night Keith decided that he wanted to sit up and watch movies downstairs like he used to. So she virtually carried him downstairs (at this point he didn't weigh much) and sat him up on the couch. The next morning she came back and he was asleep, Tv on, cigarette in the ashtray. Even in the midst of the terrible illness, big tobacco still had him hooked for "one more". That is why there is no "one more" for me- or for you.
There is nothing that will make me go back to active addiction. Is it "hard" to quit and stay that way? Yes, bit it is a whole lot easier than the journey my brother was forced to go on for the last year and a half of his life.
Stay Quit
30
1 year ago today....Rest in Peace, Keith. Thinking of you today.
Another one of the countless victims of nicotine addiction.
Never Again. For Any Reason.
Prayers and thoughts with you 30.
I'm with You, never again for any reason.
Watched and lived the same thing with my father. This addiction is a wicked bitch, proud to be clean with you !!
Yes. Thoughts and prayers with ya, 30. Proud to be quit with you, too.
-
Thanks again for the overwhelming support. I am deeply moved by it.
My sister-in-law (the wife of one of my other brothers) has been my brother's caregiver for the duration of the illness, which became a full time job for the last 3 months of his life. She wanted to do it, she is one very special lady. I owe her a huge debt of gratitude. She spent her time over the last 3 months granting his every wish, making him as comfortable as possible, cleaning, feeding, taking care of all of his medical needs, running out for ice cream to make milkshakes that she knew he would only take 1 sip of, She is truly physically and mentally exhausted at this point. Yesterday she told me this:
One night Keith decided that he wanted to sit up and watch movies downstairs like he used to. So she virtually carried him downstairs (at this point he didn't weigh much) and sat him up on the couch. The next morning she came back and he was asleep, Tv on, cigarette in the ashtray. Even in the midst of the terrible illness, big tobacco still had him hooked for "one more". That is why there is no "one more" for me- or for you.
There is nothing that will make me go back to active addiction. Is it "hard" to quit and stay that way? Yes, bit it is a whole lot easier than the journey my brother was forced to go on for the last year and a half of his life.
Stay Quit
30
1 year ago today....Rest in Peace, Keith. Thinking of you today.
Another one of the countless victims of nicotine addiction.
Never Again. For Any Reason.
Prayers and thoughts with you 30.
I'm with You, never again for any reason.
Watched and lived the same thing with my father. This addiction is a wicked bitch, proud to be clean with you !!
Yes. Thoughts and prayers with ya, 30. Proud to be quit with you, too.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I have been craving lately and this made my quit stronger today. Thoughts with you, and thanks again for sharing.
-
Thanks again for the overwhelming support. I am deeply moved by it.
My sister-in-law (the wife of one of my other brothers) has been my brother's caregiver for the duration of the illness, which became a full time job for the last 3 months of his life. She wanted to do it, she is one very special lady. I owe her a huge debt of gratitude. She spent her time over the last 3 months granting his every wish, making him as comfortable as possible, cleaning, feeding, taking care of all of his medical needs, running out for ice cream to make milkshakes that she knew he would only take 1 sip of, She is truly physically and mentally exhausted at this point. Yesterday she told me this:
One night Keith decided that he wanted to sit up and watch movies downstairs like he used to. So she virtually carried him downstairs (at this point he didn't weigh much) and sat him up on the couch. The next morning she came back and he was asleep, Tv on, cigarette in the ashtray. Even in the midst of the terrible illness, big tobacco still had him hooked for "one more". That is why there is no "one more" for me- or for you.
There is nothing that will make me go back to active addiction. Is it "hard" to quit and stay that way? Yes, bit it is a whole lot easier than the journey my brother was forced to go on for the last year and a half of his life.
Stay Quit
30
1 year ago today....Rest in Peace, Keith. Thinking of you today.
Another one of the countless victims of nicotine addiction.
Never Again. For Any Reason.
Prayers and thoughts with you 30.
I'm with You, never again for any reason.
Watched and lived the same thing with my father. This addiction is a wicked bitch, proud to be clean with you !!
Yes. Thoughts and prayers with ya, 30. Proud to be quit with you, too.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I have been craving lately and this made my quit stronger today. Thoughts with you, and thanks again for sharing.
You and yours are in our hearts and prayers! Thanks for all you put out here...
-
Thanks again for the overwhelming support. I am deeply moved by it.
My sister-in-law (the wife of one of my other brothers) has been my brother's caregiver for the duration of the illness, which became a full time job for the last 3 months of his life. She wanted to do it, she is one very special lady. I owe her a huge debt of gratitude. She spent her time over the last 3 months granting his every wish, making him as comfortable as possible, cleaning, feeding, taking care of all of his medical needs, running out for ice cream to make milkshakes that she knew he would only take 1 sip of, She is truly physically and mentally exhausted at this point. Yesterday she told me this:
One night Keith decided that he wanted to sit up and watch movies downstairs like he used to. So she virtually carried him downstairs (at this point he didn't weigh much) and sat him up on the couch. The next morning she came back and he was asleep, Tv on, cigarette in the ashtray. Even in the midst of the terrible illness, big tobacco still had him hooked for "one more". That is why there is no "one more" for me- or for you.
There is nothing that will make me go back to active addiction. Is it "hard" to quit and stay that way? Yes, bit it is a whole lot easier than the journey my brother was forced to go on for the last year and a half of his life.
Stay Quit
30
1 year ago today....Rest in Peace, Keith. Thinking of you today.
Another one of the countless victims of nicotine addiction.
Never Again. For Any Reason.
Prayers and thoughts with you 30.
I'm with You, never again for any reason.
Watched and lived the same thing with my father. This addiction is a wicked bitch, proud to be clean with you !!
Yes. Thoughts and prayers with ya, 30. Proud to be quit with you, too.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I have been craving lately and this made my quit stronger today. Thoughts with you, and thanks again for sharing.
You and yours are in our hearts and prayers! Thanks for all you put out here...
Thanks for the reminder of the responsibility of free will.
-
Thursday night into yesterday I was quite sick with a stomach bug. I was very uncomfortable, couldn't sleep. I actually lost my patience a bit and thought to myself how I couldn't WAIT until it was over, until I felt better. I was kinda feeling sorry for myself. Thankfully, today I am feeling a little bit better, and I'm pretty sure I'll be "back in the saddle" tomorrow.
In the middle of it I thought about my brother's battle with cancer and how he had no "better tomorrow" to look forward to. The only way he felt remotely comfortable was when he was medicated to the point of incoherence. Same is true of many people battling cancer... people like randy (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6786), Sean (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDFNqOuZ3II) or Tom (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6800)
There are many reasons to quit and stay that way. Some of these are seen fairly quickly... things like healthier gums, better blood pressure, reduction or elimination of acid reflux. Some you will never know - Like if the next dip would have been the one that started cancer. To me, it puts the mild discomfort of a crave into perspective.
-
Thursday night into yesterday I was quite sick with a stomach bug. I was very uncomfortable, couldn't sleep. I actually lost my patience a bit and thought to myself how I couldn't WAIT until it was over, until I felt better. I was kinda feeling sorry for myself. Thankfully, today I am feeling a little bit better, and I'm pretty sure I'll be "back in the saddle" tomorrow.
In the middle of it I thought about my brother's battle with cancer and how he had no "better tomorrow" to look forward to. The only way he felt remotely comfortable was when he was medicated to the point of incoherence. Same is true of many people battling cancer... people like randy (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6786), Sean (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDFNqOuZ3II) or Tom (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6800)
There are many reasons to quit and stay that way. Some of these are seen fairly quickly... things like healthier gums, better blood pressure, reduction or elimination of acid reflux. Some you will never know - Like if the next dip would have been the one that started cancer. To me, it puts the mild discomfort of a crave into perspective.
thank you 30.. I needed that. always the right words for me. I was craving lately feeling sorry for myself. once in awhile I need to put things in perspective. I completely forgot about acid reflux. I used to get it bad, not anymore.. :)
thanks again for sharing..
-
Thursday night into yesterday I was quite sick with a stomach bug. I was very uncomfortable, couldn't sleep. I actually lost my patience a bit and thought to myself how I couldn't WAIT until it was over, until I felt better. I was kinda feeling sorry for myself. Thankfully, today I am feeling a little bit better, and I'm pretty sure I'll be "back in the saddle" tomorrow.
In the middle of it I thought about my brother's battle with cancer and how he had no "better tomorrow" to look forward to. The only way he felt remotely comfortable was when he was medicated to the point of incoherence. Same is true of many people battling cancer... people like randy (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6786), Sean (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDFNqOuZ3II) or Tom (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6800)
There are many reasons to quit and stay that way. Some of these are seen fairly quickly... things like healthier gums, better blood pressure, reduction or elimination of acid reflux. Some you will never know - Like if the next dip would have been the one that started cancer. To me, it puts the mild discomfort of a crave into perspective.
thank you 30.. I needed that. always the right words for me. I was craving lately feeling sorry for myself. once in awhile I need to put things in perspective. I completely forgot about acid reflux. I used to get it bad, not anymore.. :)
thanks again for sharing..
Thanks for that 30.
Get on the mend soon, brother.
-
Thursday night into yesterday I was quite sick with a stomach bug. I was very uncomfortable, couldn't sleep. I actually lost my patience a bit and thought to myself how I couldn't WAIT until it was over, until I felt better. I was kinda feeling sorry for myself. Thankfully, today I am feeling a little bit better, and I'm pretty sure I'll be "back in the saddle" tomorrow.
In the middle of it I thought about my brother's battle with cancer and how he had no "better tomorrow" to look forward to. The only way he felt remotely comfortable was when he was medicated to the point of incoherence. Same is true of many people battling cancer... people like randy (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6786), Sean (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDFNqOuZ3II) or Tom (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=6800)
There are many reasons to quit and stay that way. Some of these are seen fairly quickly... things like healthier gums, better blood pressure, reduction or elimination of acid reflux. Some you will never know - Like if the next dip would have been the one that started cancer. To me, it puts the mild discomfort of a crave into perspective.
thank you 30.. I needed that. always the right words for me. I was craving lately feeling sorry for myself. once in awhile I need to put things in perspective. I completely forgot about acid reflux. I used to get it bad, not anymore.. :)
thanks again for sharing..
Thanks for that 30.
Get on the mend soon, brother.
Well wishes and thanks for the perspective thoughts. You are right, we just never know that is why committing to quit daily takes that chance and discards it
QLAFM
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Bump for some awesomeness
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Bump for some awesomeness
bumped again for someone's reading assignment as an example of badassaery
-
ahem...
you folks that come back under a new name know that the magic of this site is accountability, right???
without it you might just as well try to paint the wind. Man (or woman) up ferfucksake! Come clean, take your lumps, and be a man (woman) of your word!
(*30 goes back under the porch, muttering to himself*)
-
ahem...
you folks that come back under a new name know that the magic of this site is accountability, right???
without it you might just as well try to paint the wind. Man (or woman) up ferfucksake! Come clean, take your lumps, and be a man (woman) of your word!
(*30 goes back under the porch, muttering to himself*)
I'm curious as to whom you are referring? PM it to me if you don't want to air it in public?
-
I apologize in advance for being self indulgent. and feeling sorry for myself.
But DAMMIT!!!
I am sick of the endless tragedy that has ravaged my family for the last couple of years! 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head'
no f*cking way am I even thinking about caving...
but I have had ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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I apologize in advance for being self indulgent. and feeling sorry for myself.
But DAMMIT!!!
I am sick of the endless tragedy that has ravaged my family for the last couple of years! 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head'
no f*cking way am I even thinking about caving...
but I have had ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The value of suffering. (http://www.nytimes.com/2013/09/08/opinion/sunday/the-value-of-suffering.html?pagewanted=1&_r=0&ref=general&src=me)
-
I apologize in advance for being self indulgent. and feeling sorry for myself.
But DAMMIT!!!
I am sick of the endless tragedy that has ravaged my family for the last couple of years! 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head'
no f*cking way am I even thinking about caving...
but I have had ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Very sorry for your losses and the tragedies that have befallen your family. Deepest prayers of peace lifted for your family.
-
Thanks Roam and Copen.
It's been quite a week. I received news that my Cousin was in the hospital with pneumonia, on a respirator and unable to be weaned off. The longer he stayed on the respirator, the more likely that his lungs would "forget" how to breathe. My cousin is 58, a lifelong smoker. He has blood clots in his legs and has heart damage. He is now off the respirator and is recovering from pneumonia. The heart damage will not heal, however. It was a really close call for him.
A couple of days later, I received news that my brother has prostate cancer. It has spread, so there is no cure. They believe he will live a few more years with treatments, but it is a death sentence, albeit a slow (and painful) one. My brother is 50, also a lifelong smoker. Smoking not only adds to the risk of contracting prostate cancer, but also makes the cancer more aggressive.
Regardless of the delivery method, nicotine addiction has many ways to kill you.
Stay quit, my friends. Your life depends on it.
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ile keep you in my prayers 30 year.......
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Prayers sent up for sure!
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:WastedPanel:
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:WastedPanel:
I quit with this quitter ^^^^^ EDD, ODAAT and NAFAR, period
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:WastedPanel:
I quit with this quitter ^^^^^ EDD, ODAAT and NAFAR, period
30's back....fuck yeah. Still one of my favorite MODS all-time.
'BanDog'
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:WastedPanel:
I quit with this quitter ^^^^^ EDD, ODAAT and NAFAR, period
30's back....fuck yeah. Still one of my favorite MODS all-time.
'BanDog'
roll model extraordinaire!
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Day 1246
I have battled the nic bitch for 1246 days. The beginning of the battle was a frontal attack.. no way to forget I was an addict... no way not to acknowledge just one dip would lead to another, and another, and another. I hit about day 30, and REALLY started to enjoy my newly found freedom. You know what? It scared the shit out of me. I had failed too many times before, and I knew that the minute I became complacent the nic-bitch was going to start whispering in my ear.
1246 days- I still have occasional cravings. When they hit the first thing I think about is my promise that I made. The people that I would let down. 1246 days I have posted roll. It means as much to me today as it did on day 1. It has to. To let it fade is to be careless with the freedom that I have. 33 years a slave. 3+ years free. I REFUSE to be a slave again.
1246 days of posting roll. A promise. A celebration, A chance to say Thank You KTC, Thank you to the hundreds of people here that helped get me this far.
I wouldnÂ’t miss it for the world.
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Those of you that know me know that I lost my brother in 2011 of throat cancer. The story is in this introÂ… I think somewhere in here is the fact that I lost my mother to emphysema at 56. So tobacco has directly claimed 2 in my family to date. AnywayÂ….
A couple of years ago my other brother goes to the doctor for a checkupÂ… they find his prostate cancer markers highÂ… They do some tests and give him a clean bill of health.
He went back to the doctors about 6 months ago because he was having pain in his hip. HeÂ’s 51 at this point, so hip pain isnÂ’t so normalÂ… they run some tests and he is stage 4 prostate cancerÂ… metastasized to the bone, hence the hip pain , no cure, chemo and hormone therapy will prolong his life, but eventually this terrible disease will ravage his body, just like it did with my oldest brotherÂ… different type of cancer, same result.
Now prostate cancer may not be the first cancer to come to mind when you think of cancers caused by tobacco, but prostate cancers found in smokers tend to me much more aggressiveÂ… so at the very least, smoking is a contributing factor to the number of days that my brother has to be with his wife. The number of days to hug his children. He has 3: a 21 year old son and two daughters, 16 and 15.
Tonight I went to a family gathering to see my brotherÂ… His hair is thin courtesy of the latest round of chemoÂ… teeth are starting to turn black, also courtesy of chemo. His complexion is pale. His hands shake when he tries to do the simplest of tasks. As much as he puts on his game face, you can tell that the chemo and cancer are knocking the shit out of him. He confessed to me that depression descends on him like a dark cloud as he thinks about the days that are inevitably going to come. When he thinks about the suffering, When he thinks about the hardship his family is going to go through. When he thinks about leaving the 4 people in this world that he loves most of all. His wife, his rockÂ… well she looks tired. She is already grieving inside. I can see it in her eyes. In her tone. They both put on their game face, but it is easy to see what lies beneath.
Know that what has happened to my brother can happen to any one of usÂ… and each day that we choose to continue to use tobacco increases the chances that it will happen to us. Put yourself in my brotherÂ’s shoesÂ… think about what it would be like to come back to the doctors and tell your wife. To know that you are dying and wait until your children are off from school to tell them. To watch them as you tell them that you are dying. To watch them as their eyes well up with tears. To know that you could have made a single decision that would have protected them from all of this painÂ….
The decision to quit, and to stay that way. Never Again - For Any Reason.
-
Those of you that know me know that I lost my brother in 2011 of throat cancer. The story is in this introÂ… I think somewhere in here is the fact that I lost my mother to emphysema at 56. So tobacco has directly claimed 2 in my family to date. AnywayÂ….
A couple of years ago my other brother goes to the doctor for a checkupÂ… they find his prostate cancer markers highÂ… They do some tests and give him a clean bill of health.
He went back to the doctors about 6 months ago because he was having pain in his hip. HeÂ’s 51 at this point, so hip pain isnÂ’t so normalÂ… they run some tests and he is stage 4 prostate cancerÂ… metastasized to the bone, hence the hip pain , no cure, chemo and hormone therapy will prolong his life, but eventually this terrible disease will ravage his body, just like it did with my oldest brotherÂ… different type of cancer, same result.
Now prostate cancer may not be the first cancer to come to mind when you think of cancers caused by tobacco, but prostate cancers found in smokers tend to me much more aggressiveÂ… so at the very least, smoking is a contributing factor to the number of days that my brother has to be with his wife. The number of days to hug his children. He has 3: a 21 year old son and two daughters, 16 and 15.
Tonight I went to a family gathering to see my brotherÂ… His hair is thin courtesy of the latest round of chemoÂ… teeth are starting to turn black, also courtesy of chemo. His complexion is pale. His hands shake when he tries to do the simplest of tasks. As much as he puts on his game face, you can tell that the chemo and cancer are knocking the shit out of him. He confessed to me that depression descends on him like a dark cloud as he thinks about the days that are inevitably going to come. When he thinks about the suffering, When he thinks about the hardship his family is going to go through. When he thinks about leaving the 4 people in this world that he loves most of all. His wife, his rockÂ… well she looks tired. She is already grieving inside. I can see it in her eyes. In her tone. They both put on their game face, but it is easy to see what lies beneath.
Know that what has happened to my brother can happen to any one of usÂ… and each day that we choose to continue to use tobacco increases the chances that it will happen to us. Put yourself in my brotherÂ’s shoesÂ… think about what it would be like to come back to the doctors and tell your wife. To know that you are dying and wait until your children are off from school to tell them. To watch them as you tell them that you are dying. To watch them as their eyes well up with tears. To know that you could have made a single decision that would have protected them from all of this painÂ….
The decision to quit, and to stay that way. Never Again - For Any Reason.
Thanks for sharing. My heartfelt sympathies for your family and you. These stories, though extremely painful to go through and share, help a lot of us quitters by keeping us motivated.
Thank you and I am truly sorry.
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Those of you that know me know that I lost my brother in 2011 of throat cancer. The story is in this introÂ… I think somewhere in here is the fact that I lost my mother to emphysema at 56. So tobacco has directly claimed 2 in my family to date. AnywayÂ….
A couple of years ago my other brother goes to the doctor for a checkupÂ… they find his prostate cancer markers highÂ… They do some tests and give him a clean bill of health.
He went back to the doctors about 6 months ago because he was having pain in his hip. HeÂ’s 51 at this point, so hip pain isnÂ’t so normalÂ… they run some tests and he is stage 4 prostate cancerÂ… metastasized to the bone, hence the hip pain , no cure, chemo and hormone therapy will prolong his life, but eventually this terrible disease will ravage his body, just like it did with my oldest brotherÂ… different type of cancer, same result.
Now prostate cancer may not be the first cancer to come to mind when you think of cancers caused by tobacco, but prostate cancers found in smokers tend to me much more aggressiveÂ… so at the very least, smoking is a contributing factor to the number of days that my brother has to be with his wife. The number of days to hug his children. He has 3: a 21 year old son and two daughters, 16 and 15.
Tonight I went to a family gathering to see my brotherÂ… His hair is thin courtesy of the latest round of chemoÂ… teeth are starting to turn black, also courtesy of chemo. His complexion is pale. His hands shake when he tries to do the simplest of tasks. As much as he puts on his game face, you can tell that the chemo and cancer are knocking the shit out of him. He confessed to me that depression descends on him like a dark cloud as he thinks about the days that are inevitably going to come. When he thinks about the suffering, When he thinks about the hardship his family is going to go through. When he thinks about leaving the 4 people in this world that he loves most of all. His wife, his rockÂ… well she looks tired. She is already grieving inside. I can see it in her eyes. In her tone. They both put on their game face, but it is easy to see what lies beneath.
Know that what has happened to my brother can happen to any one of usÂ… and each day that we choose to continue to use tobacco increases the chances that it will happen to us. Put yourself in my brotherÂ’s shoesÂ… think about what it would be like to come back to the doctors and tell your wife. To know that you are dying and wait until your children are off from school to tell them. To watch them as you tell them that you are dying. To watch them as their eyes well up with tears. To know that you could have made a single decision that would have protected them from all of this painÂ….
The decision to quit, and to stay that way. Never Again - For Any Reason.
I'm posting roll first thing tomorrow. Prayers 30.
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Those of you that know me know that I lost my brother in 2011 of throat cancer. The story is in this introÂ… I think somewhere in here is the fact that I lost my mother to emphysema at 56. So tobacco has directly claimed 2 in my family to date. AnywayÂ….
A couple of years ago my other brother goes to the doctor for a checkupÂ… they find his prostate cancer markers highÂ… They do some tests and give him a clean bill of health.
He went back to the doctors about 6 months ago because he was having pain in his hip. HeÂ’s 51 at this point, so hip pain isnÂ’t so normalÂ… they run some tests and he is stage 4 prostate cancerÂ… metastasized to the bone, hence the hip pain , no cure, chemo and hormone therapy will prolong his life, but eventually this terrible disease will ravage his body, just like it did with my oldest brotherÂ… different type of cancer, same result.
Now prostate cancer may not be the first cancer to come to mind when you think of cancers caused by tobacco, but prostate cancers found in smokers tend to me much more aggressiveÂ… so at the very least, smoking is a contributing factor to the number of days that my brother has to be with his wife. The number of days to hug his children. He has 3: a 21 year old son and two daughters, 16 and 15.
Tonight I went to a family gathering to see my brotherÂ… His hair is thin courtesy of the latest round of chemoÂ… teeth are starting to turn black, also courtesy of chemo. His complexion is pale. His hands shake when he tries to do the simplest of tasks. As much as he puts on his game face, you can tell that the chemo and cancer are knocking the shit out of him. He confessed to me that depression descends on him like a dark cloud as he thinks about the days that are inevitably going to come. When he thinks about the suffering, When he thinks about the hardship his family is going to go through. When he thinks about leaving the 4 people in this world that he loves most of all. His wife, his rockÂ… well she looks tired. She is already grieving inside. I can see it in her eyes. In her tone. They both put on their game face, but it is easy to see what lies beneath.
Know that what has happened to my brother can happen to any one of usÂ… and each day that we choose to continue to use tobacco increases the chances that it will happen to us. Put yourself in my brotherÂ’s shoesÂ… think about what it would be like to come back to the doctors and tell your wife. To know that you are dying and wait until your children are off from school to tell them. To watch them as you tell them that you are dying. To watch them as their eyes well up with tears. To know that you could have made a single decision that would have protected them from all of this painÂ….
The decision to quit, and to stay that way. Never Again - For Any Reason.
I really don't have any words brother. Never again, for any reason indeed.
-
Those of you that know me know that I lost my brother in 2011 of throat cancer. The story is in this introÂ… I think somewhere in here is the fact that I lost my mother to emphysema at 56. So tobacco has directly claimed 2 in my family to date. AnywayÂ….
A couple of years ago my other brother goes to the doctor for a checkupÂ… they find his prostate cancer markers highÂ… They do some tests and give him a clean bill of health.
He went back to the doctors about 6 months ago because he was having pain in his hip. HeÂ’s 51 at this point, so hip pain isnÂ’t so normalÂ… they run some tests and he is stage 4 prostate cancerÂ… metastasized to the bone, hence the hip pain , no cure, chemo and hormone therapy will prolong his life, but eventually this terrible disease will ravage his body, just like it did with my oldest brotherÂ… different type of cancer, same result.
Now prostate cancer may not be the first cancer to come to mind when you think of cancers caused by tobacco, but prostate cancers found in smokers tend to me much more aggressiveÂ… so at the very least, smoking is a contributing factor to the number of days that my brother has to be with his wife. The number of days to hug his children. He has 3: a 21 year old son and two daughters, 16 and 15.
Tonight I went to a family gathering to see my brotherÂ… His hair is thin courtesy of the latest round of chemoÂ… teeth are starting to turn black, also courtesy of chemo. His complexion is pale. His hands shake when he tries to do the simplest of tasks. As much as he puts on his game face, you can tell that the chemo and cancer are knocking the shit out of him. He confessed to me that depression descends on him like a dark cloud as he thinks about the days that are inevitably going to come. When he thinks about the suffering, When he thinks about the hardship his family is going to go through. When he thinks about leaving the 4 people in this world that he loves most of all. His wife, his rockÂ… well she looks tired. She is already grieving inside. I can see it in her eyes. In her tone. They both put on their game face, but it is easy to see what lies beneath.
Know that what has happened to my brother can happen to any one of usÂ… and each day that we choose to continue to use tobacco increases the chances that it will happen to us. Put yourself in my brotherÂ’s shoesÂ… think about what it would be like to come back to the doctors and tell your wife. To know that you are dying and wait until your children are off from school to tell them. To watch them as you tell them that you are dying. To watch them as their eyes well up with tears. To know that you could have made a single decision that would have protected them from all of this painÂ….
The decision to quit, and to stay that way. Never Again - For Any Reason.
Thank you for sharing that, NAFAR.
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Congrats on being quit today man, and it's great to be battling side by side with ya!
No excuses, no outs...just quit.
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Congrats on being quit today man, and it's great to be battling side by side with ya!
No excuses, no outs...just quit.
x2
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Day 1260.
Just had a bona fide crave. Pathetic bitch. I'm quit - I posted Roll.
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It is a joy to see so many overcoming addiction one day at a time... I remember when I first started to enjoy my quit, when it became relatively easy and I was enjoying my new life free from dip. I know some of you are in that time right now. Some of you just hit the HOF and are about to continue your journey of quit. You will get to the point in your quit where you rarely even think about dip... except when you come here. At that point you might think about throwing off the "training wheels" and take your quit for a spin solo... sans KTC... sans brotherhood... After all, you are quit now, right? You are accountable to yourself, and your family, and maybe some friends that will keep you honest, You have been quit for ________ days, no way you would ever take that cancer dirt and stick it in your mouth....
If you are thinking about drifting- my advice is DON'T!
The nic bitch is going to be changing up her strategy now. It becomes a war of attrition: She is going to wait for you to get complacent and then whisper her lies in your ear... how good one would be... how you can quit right away after using a can. She is patient, like a lion looking over a herd, waiting for one to get separated, waiting for one to get distracted.
I know you can't imagine that this tactic would work, but throughout these halls there are many stories of quits being derailed by complacency. Make sure you continue to do the things that got you this far. At 1264 days, I still get occasional craves. When they come, the first thing I think of is the promise I made here in the morning. I dipped for 33 years, and spent at least 25 of them trying to quit. Posting roll is such a simple thing to do in light of all I went through. Go through another day in slavery, I will not.
Keep doing what works friend: Post Roll, Honor Your Promise, Repeat. Guaranteed to keep you quit like nobody's business.
Proud to be quit with you today.
30
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It is a joy to see so many overcoming addiction one day at a time... I remember when I first started to enjoy my quit, when it became relatively easy and I was enjoying my new life free from dip. I know some of you are in that time right now. Some of you just hit the HOF and are about to continue your journey of quit. You will get to the point in your quit where you rarely even think about dip... except when you come here. At that point you might think about throwing off the "training wheels" and take your quit for a spin solo... sans KTC... sans brotherhood... After all, you are quit now, right? You are accountable to yourself, and your family, and maybe some friends that will keep you honest, You have been quit for ________ days, no way you would ever take that cancer dirt and stick it in your mouth....
If you are thinking about drifting- my advice is DON'T!
The nic bitch is going to be changing up her strategy now. It becomes a war of attrition: She is going to wait for you to get complacent and then whisper her lies in your ear... how good one would be... how you can quit right away after using a can. She is patient, like a lion looking over a herd, waiting for one to get separated, waiting for one to get distracted.
I know you can't imagine that this tactic would work, but throughout these halls there are many stories of quits being derailed by complacency. Make sure you continue to do the things that got you this far. At 1264 days, I still get occasional craves. When they come, the first thing I think of is the promise I made here in the morning. I dipped for 33 years, and spent at least 25 of them trying to quit. Posting roll is such a simple thing to do in light of all I went through. Go through another day in slavery, I will not.
Keep doing what works friend: Post Roll, Honor Your Promise, Repeat. Guaranteed to keep you quit like nobody's business.
Proud to be quit with you today.
30
I needed to read this -thanks 30 QLF with you
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You can only win russian roulette just so long.
*click*
*click*
BANG! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IH7mjpl3U1w) -------click here
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You can only win russian roulette just so long.
*click*
*click*
BANG! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IH7mjpl3U1w) -------click here
Thank you.
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You can only win russian roulette just so long.
*click*
*click*
BANG! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IH7mjpl3U1w) -------click here
TRUTH, love it love the new movement and think they should connect with KTC as well. Great Post 30
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The ancient Greek warriors experienced overwhelming success on the battlefield. They were both feared and respected for their level of commitment to victory. The primary reason of their high level of commitment and success was not a special weapon, their skill or their training. The key to their commitment and overwhelming success on the battlefield had far more to do with a dramatic and effective motivation technique used by the Greek Commanders. After the Greeks invaded a new land the Greek commanders immediately order that the boats should be burned. The Greek commanders knew that the best way to instill commitment to success was to eliminate failure as an option. If they could not retreat then they would have to move forward.
Legend also has it that after the Spanish Conquistador Hernando Cortez landed his ships in Mexico in 1519, he ordered his men to burn the boats, because he was worried about their level of commitment. Cortez was totally committed and did not want to allowed himself and his men the option of turning back. By removing this option, Cortez and his men were forced to focus on how they could make the mission successful. Steve Curtis Chapman wrote a song based on this story titled “Burn your Ships” and it has become my theme song and a source of motivation over the last 100 days.
As addicts waging a battle against a powerful drug like nicotine, we can learn an important lesson from the ancient Greeks and from Cortez. In order to be successful in our battle against nicotine we also need to “Burn our Boats”. The definition of what is my “Boat” will differ depending on your personal situation. But the important point is that in order to be successful each of us needs to look at our options for retreat from the battle with nicotine and eliminate those options until the only remaining option is victory.
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Damn good article on exercise and addiction: http://sparkinglife.org/page/addiction (http://sparkinglife.org/page/addiction)
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Damn good article on exercise and addiction: http://sparkinglife.org/page/addiction (http://sparkinglife.org/page/addiction)
Bookmarked ... thanks 30.
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Can I interest you in $354,000?
If you spent $5 a day on tabbacco and put that same $5 a day into a retirement account growing an average of 7% (historical average of the stock market) you would have $354,000 40 years later....
Thats a lot of payola.
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Can I interest you in $354,000?
If you spent $5 a day on tabbacco and put that same $5 a day into a retirement account growing an average of 7% (historical average of the stock market) you would have $354,000 40 years later....
Thats a lot of payola.
'facepalm''
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Can I interest you in $354,000?
If you spent $5 a day on tabbacco and put that same $5 a day into a retirement account growing an average of 7% (historical average of the stock market) you would have $354,000 40 years later....
Thats a lot of payola.
'facepalm''
peek-a-boo to you too, razd. 'facepalm''
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Can I interest you in $354,000?
If you spent $5 a day on tabbacco and put that same $5 a day into a retirement account growing an average of 7% (historical average of the stock market) you would have $354,000 40 years later....
Thats a lot of payola.
This sounds like Dave Ramsey crazy talk...
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Can I interest you in $354,000?
If you spent $5 a day on tabbacco and put that same $5 a day into a retirement account growing an average of 7% (historical average of the stock market) you would have $354,000 40 years later....
Thats a lot of payola.
This sounds like Dave Ramsey crazy talk...
Ha. Ha. Dave and 30 are truth tellers!
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
Happy 55th Keith and happy Mothers Day, Mom. Thinking of you both today.
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
Happy 55th Keith and happy Mothers Day, Mom. Thinking of you both today.
Nicotine has taken way too much from us. It feels really good to take back as much as we can. Few on this site have done that better than you. You have built a solid quit of accountability and brotherhood and led many of us, who were lost and scared, to the same freedom.
Nicotine is a wicked monster. What it steals and how it steals is no better than crack or meth. But today your bro and mom are smiling at how you have harnessed something that they couldn't. And saved a lot of other lives in the process.
Thank you sir for all that you do here.
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
Happy 55th Keith and happy Mothers Day, Mom. Thinking of you both today.
Nicotine has taken way too much from us. It feels really good to take back as much as we can. Few on this site have done that better than you. You have built a solid quit of accountability and brotherhood and led many of us, who were lost and scared, to the same freedom.
Nicotine is a wicked monster. What it steals and how it steals is no better than crack or meth. But today your bro and mom are smiling at how you have harnessed something that they couldn't. And saved a lot of other lives in the process.
Thank you sir for all that you do here.
What a powerful story. Thoughts and prayers are with you even so many years later. This is eye-opening as to the hatred that we all should have for the company(ies) that would do this to people for no other reason than to make money off of that misery.
My brother is currently on the tail end of cancer treatment (and God-willing he's done with it after that). It was not necessarily a chew-related cancer, but who knows. Nonetheless, he put down the can for awhile during the worst of the treatment, but now he's back at it. Quit drugs, started smoking. Quit smoking, started chewing. I pray everyday that he chooses his health and his family before something like what happened to your brother happens to him. Did I mention he's only 30 years old?
Thanks for posting this story, it has strengthened my resolve to never let nicotine take away the freedom that I am slowly earning back.
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
Happy 55th Keith and happy Mothers Day, Mom. Thinking of you both today.
Nicotine has taken way too much from us. It feels really good to take back as much as we can. Few on this site have done that better than you. You have built a solid quit of accountability and brotherhood and led many of us, who were lost and scared, to the same freedom.
Nicotine is a wicked monster. What it steals and how it steals is no better than crack or meth. But today your bro and mom are smiling at how you have harnessed something that they couldn't. And saved a lot of other lives in the process.
Thank you sir for all that you do here.
What a powerful story. Thoughts and prayers are with you even so many years later. This is eye-opening as to the hatred that we all should have for the company(ies) that would do this to people for no other reason than to make money off of that misery.
My brother is currently on the tail end of cancer treatment (and God-willing he's done with it after that). It was not necessarily a chew-related cancer, but who knows. Nonetheless, he put down the can for awhile during the worst of the treatment, but now he's back at it. Quit drugs, started smoking. Quit smoking, started chewing. I pray everyday that he chooses his health and his family before something like what happened to your brother happens to him. Did I mention he's only 30 years old?
Thanks for posting this story, it has strengthened my resolve to never let nicotine take away the freedom that I am slowly earning back.
Sorry to hear about your brother.. that sucks. I'll keep him in my prayers that the cancer stays away and he finds the desire and courage to quit
Glad you are here, friend.
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Day 75
I just found out today that my 50 year old brother's throat cancer has come back with a vengeance. He now has a trach. He has a tumor growing on his cardioid artery, which the doctors don't have any way to treat. A max of 5 years is what they give him. 5 years lived more like a sentence than a life....Indeed a sad day for me. He was a smoker for the last 36 years or so. He was still smoking in Feb when I saw him, despite going through chemo and radiation. Reminded me of watching my mother smoking and then strapping the oxygen to her nose. The oxygen that she needed because of emphysema. As loot said the other day Addiction is a motherfucker. And while we are all responsible for ourselves, and nobody forces us to use nicotine, the fact is there is a pusher out there. That pusher doesn't give a damn about the lives, the misery, the destroyed families. Doesn't care about widows, or orphans. Doesn't care about cancer. Doesn't care about someone who will never be able to talk again. Doesn't care that I lost my mother when she was 54. A slow death by asphyxiation. Or that I will probably loose my brother by the time he is 54. Doesn't care that he will have surgery after surgery. Doesn't care that my father has to watch his son in so much misery just like he watched his wife of 35 years. It's enough to break even the strongest of men - and it has.
That pusher only cares to keep you addicted. So the pusher can make money. I am ANGRY. I HATE THE PUSHER, There is no justice. There is no revenge to be had except this: The only thing I can do to get even is to stay quit. And help you do the same.
I'll be back here tomorrow. And my mission has more resolve than it ever has. God help big tobacco.
I just got the sad news that Hospice has been called in for my brother. It is going to be a sad Christmas...not much to say except I am filled with sorrow. He is now 51 and it is unlikely that he will see 52.
My brother makes the third person in my family that has been murdered by big tobacco
Grandfather- emphysema
Mother - emphysema
Brother- Throat Cancer
Stay Quit.
Rest in Peace Keith
1960-2011
Happy 55th Keith and happy Mothers Day, Mom. Thinking of you both today.
Nicotine has taken way too much from us. It feels really good to take back as much as we can. Few on this site have done that better than you. You have built a solid quit of accountability and brotherhood and led many of us, who were lost and scared, to the same freedom.
Nicotine is a wicked monster. What it steals and how it steals is no better than crack or meth. But today your bro and mom are smiling at how you have harnessed something that they couldn't. And saved a lot of other lives in the process.
Thank you sir for all that you do here.
What a powerful story. Thoughts and prayers are with you even so many years later. This is eye-opening as to the hatred that we all should have for the company(ies) that would do this to people for no other reason than to make money off of that misery.
My brother is currently on the tail end of cancer treatment (and God-willing he's done with it after that). It was not necessarily a chew-related cancer, but who knows. Nonetheless, he put down the can for awhile during the worst of the treatment, but now he's back at it. Quit drugs, started smoking. Quit smoking, started chewing. I pray everyday that he chooses his health and his family before something like what happened to your brother happens to him. Did I mention he's only 30 years old?
Thanks for posting this story, it has strengthened my resolve to never let nicotine take away the freedom that I am slowly earning back.
Sorry to hear about your brother.. that sucks. I'll keep him in my prayers that the cancer stays away and he finds the desire and courage to quit
Glad you are here, friend.
You're still my Hero, 30. No Homo. (Happy?)
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Happy Birthday 30! 'arse'
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Happy Birthday 30! 'arse'
thanks!.. Don't check in here much, at my age I forget where I put the geritol 5 minutes ago....
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Happy Birthday 30! 'arse'
thanks!.. Don't check in here much, at my age I forget where I put the geritol 5 minutes ago....
Happy birthday olé friend! Miss seeing you in new groups, wish you would come spread the quit gospel! Quit on my brother!
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Happy Birthday 30! 'arse'
thanks!.. Don't check in here much, at my age I forget where I put the geritol 5 minutes ago....
Happy birthday olé friend! Miss seeing you in new groups, wish you would come spread the quit gospel! Quit on my brother!
I'll be back to full duty soon pab. almost ready to dive back in.
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You're coming up on 5 years, and in case I am not on and around here tomorrow, I needed to come say congratulations on your 5 years quit.
More importantly, I needed to come and give my respect and heartfelt thanks to you for being a strong quit example and for always giving myself and my group the greatest support.
Quit on sir!
Much respect, Chick
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I came in here because I thought the header said Withdrawal Sex!!! Never mind!!!
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Congrats on 5 years brother!
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2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
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2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
Outstanding achievement. COngrats on 2,000. Enjoy and keep posting +1's Appreciate the leadership.
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2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
Outstanding achievement. COngrats on 2,000. Enjoy and keep posting +1's Appreciate the leadership.
2,000 days to a great leader...thank for what you do here, thanks for always supporting, its appreciated!
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2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
Outstanding achievement. COngrats on 2,000. Enjoy and keep posting +1's Appreciate the leadership.
2,000 days to a great leader...thank for what you do here, thanks for always supporting, its appreciated!
Nice job man and thanks for all you do!
-
2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
Outstanding achievement. COngrats on 2,000. Enjoy and keep posting +1's Appreciate the leadership.
2,000 days to a great leader...thank for what you do here, thanks for always supporting, its appreciated!
Nice job man and thanks for all you do!
Congrats on the double comma, Dale!
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2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
Outstanding achievement. COngrats on 2,000. Enjoy and keep posting +1's Appreciate the leadership.
2,000 days to a great leader...thank for what you do here, thanks for always supporting, its appreciated!
Nice job man and thanks for all you do!
Congrats on the double comma, Dale!
Congrats, great accomplishment
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2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
Outstanding achievement. COngrats on 2,000. Enjoy and keep posting +1's Appreciate the leadership.
2,000 days to a great leader...thank for what you do here, thanks for always supporting, its appreciated!
Nice job man and thanks for all you do!
Congrats on the double comma, Dale!
Congrats, great accomplishment
Wow! Double comma. What a stud. Thanks for being a great example of Quit power.
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2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
Outstanding achievement. COngrats on 2,000. Enjoy and keep posting +1's Appreciate the leadership.
2,000 days to a great leader...thank for what you do here, thanks for always supporting, its appreciated!
Nice job man and thanks for all you do!
Congrats on the double comma, Dale!
Congrats, great accomplishment
Wow! Double comma. What a stud. Thanks for being a great example of Quit power.
Congrats on your 2000 days!
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2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
Outstanding achievement. COngrats on 2,000. Enjoy and keep posting +1's Appreciate the leadership.
2,000 days to a great leader...thank for what you do here, thanks for always supporting, its appreciated!
Nice job man and thanks for all you do!
Congrats on the double comma, Dale!
Congrats, great accomplishment
Wow! Double comma. What a stud. Thanks for being a great example of Quit power.
Congrats on your 2000 days!
Not only does this guy have 2000 days under his belt, he also has a great name too!!! Congrats man!!!
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2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
Outstanding achievement. COngrats on 2,000. Enjoy and keep posting +1's Appreciate the leadership.
2,000 days to a great leader...thank for what you do here, thanks for always supporting, its appreciated!
Nice job man and thanks for all you do!
Congrats on the double comma, Dale!
Congrats, great accomplishment
Wow! Double comma. What a stud. Thanks for being a great example of Quit power.
Congrats on your 2000 days!
Not only does this guy have 2000 days under his belt, he also has a great name too!!! Congrats man!!!
Thanks for being a leader! Always a pleasure reading your post gospel! Quit on you badass! 2000 is awesomeness!
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2,000 days of freedom!
Thank you for paving the way for those of us in your trail. You are an inspiration and all around leader. Celebrate today!
Outstanding achievement. COngrats on 2,000. Enjoy and keep posting +1's Appreciate the leadership.
2,000 days to a great leader...thank for what you do here, thanks for always supporting, its appreciated!
Nice job man and thanks for all you do!
Congrats on the double comma, Dale!
Congrats, great accomplishment
Wow! Double comma. What a stud. Thanks for being a great example of Quit power.
Congrats on your 2000 days!
Not only does this guy have 2000 days under his belt, he also has a great name too!!! Congrats man!!!
Thanks for being a leader! Always a pleasure reading your post gospel! Quit on you badass! 2000 is awesomeness!
hoooley crap!!!! .. I completely missed this! Thanks guys and gals... 132 days late... 'embarrassed'
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Congrats on 6 years quit!!
Thanks for having my back when i need it.
Thank you for being here and showing us there's longevity to a quit!
Badassery.
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Congrats on 6 years quit!!
Thanks for having my back when i need it.
Thank you for being here and showing us there's longevity to a quit!
Badassery.
Thank you! Grateful to be quit, and humbled to be a part of what goes on here.
Thanks for paying it forward!
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Congrats on 6 years quit!!
Thanks for having my back when i need it.
Thank you for being here and showing us there's longevity to a quit!
Badassery.
Thank you! Grateful to be quit, and humbled to be a part of what goes on here.
Thanks for paying it forward!
Thank you sir. You are a mentor.
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Congrats on 6 years quit!!
Thanks for having my back when i need it.
Thank you for being here and showing us there's longevity to a quit!
Badassery.
Thank you! Grateful to be quit, and humbled to be a part of what goes on here.
Thanks for paying it forward!
Thank you sir. You are a mentor.
You Sir, are one hell of a quitter!!! Congrats on the big 6!!!
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Congrats on 6 years quit!!
Thanks for having my back when i need it.
Thank you for being here and showing us there's longevity to a quit!
Badassery.
Thank you! Grateful to be quit, and humbled to be a part of what goes on here.
Thanks for paying it forward!
Thank you sir. You are a mentor.
You Sir, are one hell of a quitter!!! Congrats on the big 6!!!
Congratulations and thanks for paying it back! We all appreciate the quit wisdom you provide!
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Congrats on 6 years quit!!
Thanks for having my back when i need it.
Thank you for being here and showing us there's longevity to a quit!
Badassery.
Thank you! Grateful to be quit, and humbled to be a part of what goes on here.
Thanks for paying it forward!
Thank you sir. You are a mentor.
You Sir, are one hell of a quitter!!! Congrats on the big 6!!!
Congratulations and thanks for paying it back! We all appreciate the quit wisdom you provide!
Thanks Folks :) Grateful to be quit, and grateful for all of you. Keep rockin' the quit! 'oh yeah'
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Congrats on 6 years quit!!
Thanks for having my back when i need it.
Thank you for being here and showing us there's longevity to a quit!
Badassery.
Thank you! Grateful to be quit, and humbled to be a part of what goes on here.
Thanks for paying it forward!
Thank you sir. You are a mentor.
You Sir, are one hell of a quitter!!! Congrats on the big 6!!!
Congratulations and thanks for paying it back! We all appreciate the quit wisdom you provide!
Thanks Folks :) Grateful to be quit, and grateful for all of you. Keep rockin' the quit! 'oh yeah'
Thank you ^^^^. For all you efforts here. It does not go without notice. Congrats on 6 years of independence and freedom from Nic!
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'Birthday' 30
And many more, dip free!
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Congrats on 7 years quit 30!
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Congrats on 7 years quit 30!
Thank you for your leadership and continued guidance.
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Congrats on 7 years quit 30!
Thank you for your leadership and continued guidance.
Thank you :) So awesome to see you folks here in intros paying it forward. I credit my quit to folks like you!
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Congrats on 7 years quit 30!
Thank you for your leadership and continued guidance.
Thank you :) So awesome to see you folks here in intros paying it forward. I credit my quit to folks like you!
Damn
7 years and they beat me to the congratulations.
30 (Dale) you were one of the first who reached out to me, you are solid a person as I have ever known and I can only say thank you.
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So last night I headed up to Albany Med to say what may be my last goodbye to my older brother, Gary. He's been fighting Prostate cancer for the past 4-5 years. Although there isn't a strong link between smoking and prostate cancer, according to his doctors, the fact that he was a smoker make the cancer a lot more aggressive. The end game is the cancer has spread to his brain, and there is pressure/bleeding. He won't survive being untreated, but he won't survive the surgery to stop the bleed/pressure either.
When I got to the room last night, Gary was knocked out with morphine, seemed somewhat comfortable. I do not think they will let him regain consciousness, which is the right thing for him...... The pain and suffering of his wife, his two beautiful daughters and his son was heart retching. His wife lost it when she told me she signed the DNR because she did not want to see him suffer... she was looking for people to tell her she made the right decision... It was unspeakably sad to have that conversation with her.. I did my best to console, but, there's not much that can be done. 55 years old, leaving a wife that adores him, a 26 year old son, a 20 year old daughter and a 19 year old daughter... too young to have to deal with the loss of their father... Senseless. tragic. no words seem adequate.
As you recall, I had a brother that passed in 2011... soon there will just be me and 1 other brother.
Never again for any reason.
Fuck cancer!
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So last night I headed up to Albany Med to say what may be my last goodbye to my older brother, Gary. He's been fighting Prostate cancer for the past 4-5 years. Although there isn't a strong link between smoking and prostate cancer, according to his doctors, the fact that he was a smoker make the cancer a lot more aggressive. The end game is the cancer has spread to his brain, and there is pressure/bleeding. He won't survive being untreated, but he won't survive the surgery to stop the bleed/pressure either.
When I got to the room last night, Gary was knocked out with morphine, seemed somewhat comfortable. I do not think they will let him regain consciousness, which is the right thing for him...... The pain and suffering of his wife, his two beautiful daughters and his son was heart retching. His wife lost it when she told me she signed the DNR because she did not want to see him suffer... she was looking for people to tell her she made the right decision... It was unspeakably sad to have that conversation with her.. I did my best to console, but, there's not much that can be done. 55 years old, leaving a wife that adores him, a 26 year old son, a 20 year old daughter and a 19 year old daughter... too young to have to deal with the loss of their father... Senseless. tragic. no words seem adequate.
As you recall, I had a brother that passed in 2011... soon there will just be me and 1 other brother.
Never again for any reason.
Fuck cancer!
Prayers for you and your family Dale. I am with you, Fuck cancer.
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So last night I headed up to Albany Med to say what may be my last goodbye to my older brother, Gary. He's been fighting Prostate cancer for the past 4-5 years. Although there isn't a strong link between smoking and prostate cancer, according to his doctors, the fact that he was a smoker make the cancer a lot more aggressive. The end game is the cancer has spread to his brain, and there is pressure/bleeding. He won't survive being untreated, but he won't survive the surgery to stop the bleed/pressure either.
When I got to the room last night, Gary was knocked out with morphine, seemed somewhat comfortable. I do not think they will let him regain consciousness, which is the right thing for him...... The pain and suffering of his wife, his two beautiful daughters and his son was heart retching. His wife lost it when she told me she signed the DNR because she did not want to see him suffer... she was looking for people to tell her she made the right decision... It was unspeakably sad to have that conversation with her.. I did my best to console, but, there's not much that can be done. 55 years old, leaving a wife that adores him, a 26 year old son, a 20 year old daughter and a 19 year old daughter... too young to have to deal with the loss of their father... Senseless. tragic. no words seem adequate.
As you recall, I had a brother that passed in 2011... soon there will just be me and 1 other brother.
Never again for any reason.
Fuck cancer!
Prayers for you and your family Dale. I am with you, Fuck cancer.
â¤?â¤
My heart breaks for you and your family.
Prayers up.
Fuck cancer.
-
So last night I headed up to Albany Med to say what may be my last goodbye to my older brother, Gary. He's been fighting Prostate cancer for the past 4-5 years. Although there isn't a strong link between smoking and prostate cancer, according to his doctors, the fact that he was a smoker make the cancer a lot more aggressive. The end game is the cancer has spread to his brain, and there is pressure/bleeding. He won't survive being untreated, but he won't survive the surgery to stop the bleed/pressure either.
When I got to the room last night, Gary was knocked out with morphine, seemed somewhat comfortable. I do not think they will let him regain consciousness, which is the right thing for him...... The pain and suffering of his wife, his two beautiful daughters and his son was heart retching. His wife lost it when she told me she signed the DNR because she did not want to see him suffer... she was looking for people to tell her she made the right decision... It was unspeakably sad to have that conversation with her.. I did my best to console, but, there's not much that can be done. 55 years old, leaving a wife that adores him, a 26 year old son, a 20 year old daughter and a 19 year old daughter... too young to have to deal with the loss of their father... Senseless. tragic. no words seem adequate.
As you recall, I had a brother that passed in 2011... soon there will just be me and 1 other brother.
Never again for any reason.
Fuck cancer!
Prayers for you and your family Dale. I am with you, Fuck cancer.
â¤?â¤
My heart breaks for you and your family.
Prayers up.
Fuck cancer.
You are a great man, 30. You have been one of the rocks of inspiration in my quit, and so many others. As such, you've fought the fight against addiction, and cancer, more than most anyone. Prayers are with you and your family during this difficult time. I'm glad you were able to say goodbye, and offer some help for his wife and children. God Bless, brother.
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So last night I headed up to Albany Med to say what may be my last goodbye to my older brother, Gary. He's been fighting Prostate cancer for the past 4-5 years. Although there isn't a strong link between smoking and prostate cancer, according to his doctors, the fact that he was a smoker make the cancer a lot more aggressive. The end game is the cancer has spread to his brain, and there is pressure/bleeding. He won't survive being untreated, but he won't survive the surgery to stop the bleed/pressure either.
When I got to the room last night, Gary was knocked out with morphine, seemed somewhat comfortable. I do not think they will let him regain consciousness, which is the right thing for him...... The pain and suffering of his wife, his two beautiful daughters and his son was heart retching. His wife lost it when she told me she signed the DNR because she did not want to see him suffer... she was looking for people to tell her she made the right decision... It was unspeakably sad to have that conversation with her.. I did my best to console, but, there's not much that can be done. 55 years old, leaving a wife that adores him, a 26 year old son, a 20 year old daughter and a 19 year old daughter... too young to have to deal with the loss of their father... Senseless. tragic. no words seem adequate.
As you recall, I had a brother that passed in 2011... soon there will just be me and 1 other brother.
Never again for any reason.
Fuck cancer!
Prayers for you and your family Dale. I am with you, Fuck cancer.
â¤?â¤
My heart breaks for you and your family.
Prayers up.
Fuck cancer.
You are a great man, 30. You have been one of the rocks of inspiration in my quit, and so many others. As such, you've fought the fight against addiction, and cancer, more than most anyone. Prayers are with you and your family during this difficult time. I'm glad you were able to say goodbye, and offer some help for his wife and children. God Bless, brother.
Prayers to you and yours 30.
Always a text away.
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Sorry to hear of your brothers passing Dale. May you and your family find peace in this difficult time.
Prayers to you and yours. F Cancer...
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I have merged your introductions