KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: slug.go on January 24, 2014, 05:45:00 PM
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Allow me to introduce myself. I'm 53, been dipping since college, yes, I'm that dumb.
I used to go through 2 cans/week, but I WAS a constant dipper, just small ones.
Made it through my first day, chewing lots of gum and Smokey Mountain.
Spent a lot of time lurking on KTC and it sure looks like the best online support group there could possibly be.
Looking forward to doubling my day count tomorrow!!!
QLF!
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Allow me to introduce myself. I'm 53, been dipping since college, yes, I'm that dumb.
I used to go through 2 cans/week, but I WAS a constant dipper, just small ones.
Made it through my first day, chewing lots of gum and Smokey Mountain.
Spent a lot of time lurking on KTC and it sure looks like the best online support group there could possibly be.
Looking forward to doubling my day count tomorrow!!!
QLF!
Quit on. 53 and quit is nice. I sent you a pm. Top right inbox (1) you have my number. Looks like you have been reading a lot. But keep reading I do everyday and it works. Post first thing in the morning EVERYDAY. See you on roll.
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Welcome. You are in the right place friend. The kool aid will set you free. Drink it.
Pb
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Welcome to KTC Slug.... And welcome to the May quit group. Buckle up and hold on, we r some determined and crazy quitters!
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Sluggo (SNL ?) I'm that dumb too. Just turned 50 and was killing myself with 2 cans a day. The only time I was dipless was when I was asleep or when the missus was frisky. The point is, is that we are all addicts. I can tell you with certainty that the decision to finally quit was the best thing I have ever done. It sucks ass big-time for awhile but then you begin to rediscover the real you. You probably don't remember him. He was a lot cooler than the current sluggo. Go find him. You will be Clean and stronger from the effort and commitment it takes to do this. Pretend nicotine Is Mr. Bill and fucking crush her once and for all.
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There is a lot of dumb here. Me included. You will fit right in. Welcome. Post roll every day. Help someone every day. Honor your promise and you will smart up pretty quick. Shout if you need personal assistance.
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There is a lot of dumb here. Me included. You will fit right in. Welcome. Post roll every day. Help someone every day. Honor your promise and you will smart up pretty quick. Shout if you need personal assistance.
Definitely a lot of accumulated dumb for sure (including my 40+ years) but look around you're surrounded by a lot more smart than can be imagined. Like Rdad said rediscover that real you or like most of us 'make the real you' because even though were getting up there in years we never lived adult lives without our crutch. I'm a pm away if you need anything.
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Sluggo (SNL ?) I'm that dumb too. Just turned 50 and was killing myself with 2 cans a day. The only time I was dipless was when I was asleep or when the missus was frisky. The point is, is that we are all addicts. I can tell you with certainty that the decision to finally quit was the best thing I have ever done. It sucks ass big-time for awhile but then you begin to rediscover the real you. You probably don't remember him. He was a lot cooler than the current sluggo. Go find him. You will be Clean and stronger from the effort and commitment it takes to do this. Pretend nicotine Is Mr. Bill and fucking crush her once and for all.
Rdad,
Good call on SNL reference, that's how I got my call sign in Navy flight school in '85.
I instructors said I was so sarcastic that they always felt like MR. Bill.
Thanks all for the encouraging words, I'm so sick and tired of this dipping B.S.
I'm thankful for this KTC madness as well.
Copenhagen and UST, go screw yourself!
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Sluggo (SNL ?) I'm that dumb too. Just turned 50 and was killing myself with 2 cans a day. The only time I was dipless was when I was asleep or when the missus was frisky. The point is, is that we are all addicts. I can tell you with certainty that the decision to finally quit was the best thing I have ever done. It sucks ass big-time for awhile but then you begin to rediscover the real you. You probably don't remember him. He was a lot cooler than the current sluggo. Go find him. You will be Clean and stronger from the effort and commitment it takes to do this. Pretend nicotine Is Mr. Bill and fucking crush her once and for all.
Rdad,
Good call on SNL reference, that's how I got my call sign in Navy flight school in '85.
I instructors said I was so sarcastic that they always felt like MR. Bill.
Thanks all for the encouraging words, I'm so sick and tired of this dipping B.S.
I'm thankful for this KTC madness as well.
Copenhagen and UST, go screw yourself!
Hit me up in a PM if you need anything. Quit on. Ps. Thanks for your service!
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Sluggo (SNL ?) I'm that dumb too. Just turned 50 and was killing myself with 2 cans a day. The only time I was dipless was when I was asleep or when the missus was frisky. The point is, is that we are all addicts. I can tell you with certainty that the decision to finally quit was the best thing I have ever done. It sucks ass big-time for awhile but then you begin to rediscover the real you. You probably don't remember him. He was a lot cooler than the current sluggo. Go find him. You will be Clean and stronger from the effort and commitment it takes to do this. Pretend nicotine Is Mr. Bill and fucking crush her once and for all.
Rdad,
Good call on SNL reference, that's how I got my call sign in Navy flight school in '85.
I instructors said I was so sarcastic that they always felt like MR. Bill.
Thanks all for the encouraging words, I'm so sick and tired of this dipping B.S.
I'm thankful for this KTC madness as well.
Copenhagen and UST, go screw yourself!
Hit me up in a PM if you need anything. Quit on. Ps. Thanks for your service! What the hell? I didn't mean to post this twice. Your replies number will be higher now! :P
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Sluggo (SNL ?) I'm that dumb too. Just turned 50 and was killing myself with 2 cans a day. The only time I was dipless was when I was asleep or when the missus was frisky. The point is, is that we are all addicts. I can tell you with certainty that the decision to finally quit was the best thing I have ever done. It sucks ass big-time for awhile but then you begin to rediscover the real you. You probably don't remember him. He was a lot cooler than the current sluggo. Go find him. You will be Clean and stronger from the effort and commitment it takes to do this. Pretend nicotine Is Mr. Bill and fucking crush her once and for all.
Rdad,
Good call on SNL reference, that's how I got my call sign in Navy flight school in '85.
I instructors said I was so sarcastic that they always felt like MR. Bill.
Thanks all for the encouraging words, I'm so sick and tired of this dipping B.S.
I'm thankful for this KTC madness as well.
Copenhagen and UST, go screw yourself!
Way to go with the quit. Know that there are people here if you need them. Some even have a sixth sense. ODAAT brother ODAAT.
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Spent a lot of time lurking on KTC and it sure looks like the best online support group there could possibly be.
Yes it is. Some may beg to differ, but for those of us who quit here every day, there is no other. Keep lurking, keep reading, and figure out how to post roll. Make that daily promise to yourself and to us here at KTC that you will not use any form of nicotine for that day. You do this, and every day we will do it with you and offer anything we can to help you stay quit for that day. We are full of tough love here, and for a website-virtual based support group, I've never experienced anything like it. It's intense.
Glad to have you on board.
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Hey Sluggo. Welcome to KTC. I used for a long time as well so I can relate, even though I have a few more years on your young ass. I just wanted to tell you that you have done a nice job of posting roll, so lets consider taking your quit to the next level. Get involved with the site. Open the salmon colored Welcome Center tab at the top of the screen and start reading the posted materials. Send out a pm to the other new quitters in May, 2014, exchanging your telephone numbers. Call or text those boys and offer support to one another. Build a network of quitters and positive individuals around you. This is not an easy train ride through the majestic mountains of far east Asia...this is a bitch of a ride at first and needs all the help you can muster to stay aboard. Be strong, committed and utilize your new network of friends. Look up at the top right of this screen and you will see Inbox(1). Open it and you will see a message from me with my telephone number. Call that number 24/7 when you need to talk...or just to shoot the shit. See you on site cowboy. Wayne
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Does someone know how to post roll from a Mac?
I keep screwing it up...
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Does someone know how to post roll from a Mac?
I keep screwing it up...
Posting roll is similar to posting on this board. On the Mac, click on "quote". Scroll down and highlight the entire box in the "Original Post to Quote." Highlight this by using your mouse or by putting your cursor in this box and going up to "Edit" and selecting "select all". Then press "command" and "X" at the same time to cut. Then go up to the box at the top "Enter your Post" and press "command" and "V" at the same time to paste. If you don't like using the command button, going to the top of the page under "Edit" will also give you cut and paste options. Once you've pasted in the Post field. Scroll down and find the last entry of the Roll call (above the supporters line). Hit enter once, then type in your name and your promise. I quit with you brother (on my iMAC).
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sluggo, I just wanted to say that you have come to the right place to quit, and it sounds like you have the right mindset coming in. Realizing you are an addict, acknowledging how stupid it is to let a poison weed rule you, and getting pissed enough to quit cold turkey. Keep that anger focused on ust and the poison. Post, read, and get involved everyday. PM me if you want my # or need anything. I will be quit with you all day.
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[QUOTE
Does someone know how to post roll from a Mac?
I keep screwing it up...
Posting roll is similar to posting on this board. On the Mac, click on "quote". Scroll down and highlight the entire box in the "Original Post to Quote." Highlight this by using your mouse or by putting your cursor in this box and going up to "Edit" and selecting "select all". Then press "command" and "X" at the same time to cut. Then go up to the box at the top "Enter your Post" and press "command" and "V" at the same time to paste. If you don't like using the command button, going to the top of the page under "Edit" will also give you cut and paste options. Once you've pasted in the Post field. Scroll down and find the last entry of the Roll call (above the supporters line). Hit enter once, then type in your name and your promise. I quit with you brother (on my iMAC).
Appreciate it, thanks, brother.
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Well, made it through a couple cocktails last night after dinner. I was slightly stressing about what would happen if I wanted a drink.
Smokey Mountain rocks! 'oh yeah'
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Well, made it through a couple cocktails last night after dinner. I was slightly stressing about what would happen if I wanted a drink.
Smokey Mountain rocks! 'oh yeah'
Be careful with the drinks. Many have begun a new day 1 after to many. I've seen many fall with a lot more days then you have. Don't think for one second you got this licked. Quit with you today.
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That's exactly what I said...it almost felt like cheating...but be vigilant because the minute you let your guard down, the minute you will loose. This is a battle - keep your weapons close and don't be afraid of what something might cause you to do, be prepared to not do it at all....especially in an early quit.
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I abstained for the early days of my quit, but I like an adult beverage or 3. Just make sure you take it easy for the first few weeks, and getting really loaded is not advised.
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Thanks, all, for the wise words. Good advice times three!
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Question for you grizzled veterans out there.
Would it be kosher to open a thread in this forum for my quit class?
Not just for my May 14 quit class, but a thread where we could consolidate as a class if we so chose. I haven't found anything prohibiting it, just not sure I saw anything like it. I know it's not the first time someone had the idea, so maybe we're supposed to stick to our May 14 Quit thread?
Thanks in advance.
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Not sure, but I would say that if you just post how you feel on your thread and look at any of your quit-groups intro threads and post there you will be team building. Sad fact is that lots of your quit group will not make it, and many who do will not get very involved so I would say not to worry about it. You are going to be a leader for your group since you are going to be a few days/weeks ahead of most of them so you can try if you want...
I will be quit with you all day.
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Was working out and 'Lover's Eyes' from Mumford and Sons comes on the iPod.
Substitute Dip/chew/snuff for 'lover's eyes' in the lyrics.
It either makes sense to you, or I'm weirdÂ…(maybe both).
Well, love was kind for a time
Now just aches and it makes me blind
This mirror holds my eyes too bright
I can't see the others in my life
Were we too young? Our heads too strong?
To bear the weight of these lover's eyes.
'Cause I feel numb, beneath your tongue
Beneath the curse of these lover's eyes.
But do not ask the price I paid,
I must live with my quiet rage,
Tame the ghosts in my head,
That run wild and wish me dead.
Should you shake my ash to the wind
Lord, forget all of my sins
Oh, don't let me die where I lie
Neath the curse of my lover's eyes.
'Cause there's no drink or drug I've tried
To rid the curse of these lover's eyes
And I feel numb, beneath your tongue
Your strength just makes me feel less strong
But do not ask the price I paid,
I must live with my quiet rage,
Tame the ghosts in my head,
That run wild and wish me dead.
Should you shake my ash to the wind
Lord, forget all of my sins
Don't let me die where I lie
Neath the curse of my lover's eyes.
And I'll walk slow, I'll walk slow
Take my hand, help me on my way.
And I'll walk slow, I'll walk slow
Take my hand, I'll be on my way.
And I'll walk slow, I'll walk slow
Take my hand, help me on my way.
And I'll walk slow, I'll walk slow
Take my hand, I'll be on my way.
Anyway, day 4 halfway gone, feeling pretty damn good. Smokey Mountain, gum and almonds are my constant companion. Odd, mouth where I used to hold dip almost feels puffy. Guess it's because I'm not assaulting it with poison 12 hours a day.
To the quit, and beyond!
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I like that Sluggo. A certain band that I like has been a big part of my quit (and my life really) You are using all your tools! Good job!-Keep Going!-I am quitting with you today my friend!
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Hey Sluggo I've been watching your quit and wanted to throw in my support here. Keep it up, you are doing it! It can get pretty hard at times, but each battle won is another one you don't have to fight again. It does get much better. Just keep your head down and trudge on when it gets tough, and take time to enjoy when it's not so tough.
My best tips are to be sure you are building out a network for your own accountability and support by getting to know fellow quitters of all experience levels, and to educate yourself on nicotine and addiction as much as you can. It really helps to know the enemy, and the more you learn the more likely you will become absolutely pissed about how evil this enemy really is.
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Just had to share thisÂ…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TVÂ…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gymÂ…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knowsÂ…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
'crackup' well told!
Forget the hottie, you now have the ability to always get a machine at the fitness center, a table or chair at restaurants and bars. A seat at the big-boy table. Its a freaking super-power! Use it wisely...
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
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'crackup' glad its not just me! I still get that sometimes, at day 98. I have a similar diet too. 'crackup'
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You healthy diet guys need to back off the kale and eat some bacon. That's the problem. You eat fruits and veggies all the time and wonder why you shart yourselves. Have a milkshake and a burger once in a while. Also if you are married and don't give a hoot, I think you should let it rip and be proud! You got busted anyway...
Thanks for sharing I almost pissed myself! Quit on.
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
'crackup' 'crackup' This happened to me once in gym class when I was in 8th grade. I held it in all day but then it was time to run laps (indoor gym) and it came out with each step like I was trying to keep a beat! The whole damn class was laughing too hard to run, me included!
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Throw a daily banana, apple and some blueberries into your daily diet if you really want to clear the whole gym.
'fart'
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
I eat healthy too; however, I find the rancid gas useful since I fly Southwest most of the time. It is amazing how much room you can gain my dropping that kind of ass in a plane seat during boarding.
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
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Hey Sluggo how's your quit going? be sure to get a weekend plan in place. Nice job so far, way to be involved. post role and live up to your word, and build out your network.
I see a lot of me in your intro, so I'm glad to provide support if there is any way I can help!
Keep it going!
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Thanks for asking. I'm doing good. Kind of waiting to be sucker punched. Haven't had any 'OH FUCK' cravings, just mildly annoying and short-lived ones. I do step into the garage where I used to hide my dip and absent-mindedly think I'm going for a dip when in reality I'm going for firewood. That kind of gives me a chuckle. Fake chew, gum and jerky are my new Three Amigos.
Weekend plan is in place, I really don't know anyone else who still dips, so I doubt I'll see anything. Good DU party saturday on E. Shore, then DA GAME Sunday when Denver bitch slaps the Seafags. I'll be home with the family for that, should be easy peasy.
Have about a dozen digits in case of emergency. Of course I'll be posting, too.
I am one quitting MF. ODAAT!
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You are winning! Keep calm and quit on.
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10 days down, Weekend success! Stared down a few triggers this weekend and won.
Went to Ducks Unlimited Oyster Roast, great party every year, a friend of mine is the host. Had couple beers, lots of dippers there but I had my SM and didn't even get a crave watching all those subtle and not so subtle cancer eaters. Then spent the rest of Saturday at the beach house, alone. Would have been oh so easy to score a can of Cope and enjoy it on the front porch with a nice cocktail. I had to stop for gas at a C. store, didn't even cross my mind until I was leaving that I could go in and get some dip.
But , I didn't, first time I've been there dip-free. Pinged around, made some minor repairs, watched a movie and got a great night's sleep
Family friends coming over to watch SB tonight, shouldn't be a problem, SM is doing the trick for me, so far.
Snow is melting, I'm going for a motorcycle ride and for the first time in a long time, I won't have a dip in!
KTC has been there for me all the way, loving it!
To all my May brothers that sent out the 'keep the faith' texts over the last couple days, I quit with you every day, one day at a time!
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10 days down, Weekend success! Stared down a few triggers this weekend and won.
Went to Ducks Unlimited Oyster Roast, great party every year, a friend of mine is the host. Had couple beers, lots of dippers there but I had my SM and didn't even get a crave watching all those subtle and not so subtle cancer eaters. Then spent the rest of Saturday at the beach house, alone. Would have been oh so easy to score a can of Cope and enjoy it on the front porch with a nice cocktail. I had to stop for gas at a C. store, didn't even cross my mind until I was leaving that I could go in and get some dip.
But , I didn't, first time I've been there dip-free. Pinged around, made some minor repairs, watched a movie and got a great night's sleep
Family friends coming over to watch SB tonight, shouldn't be a problem, SM is doing the trick for me, so far.
Snow is melting, I'm going for a motorcycle ride and for the first time in a long time, I won't have a dip in!
KTC has been there for me all the way, loving it!
To all my May brothers that sent out the 'keep the faith' texts over the last couple days, I quit with you every day, one day at a time!
Congrats on double digits bro.
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10 days down, Weekend success! Stared down a few triggers this weekend and won.
Went to Ducks Unlimited Oyster Roast, great party every year, a friend of mine is the host. Had couple beers, lots of dippers there but I had my SM and didn't even get a crave watching all those subtle and not so subtle cancer eaters. Then spent the rest of Saturday at the beach house, alone. Would have been oh so easy to score a can of Cope and enjoy it on the front porch with a nice cocktail. I had to stop for gas at a C. store, didn't even cross my mind until I was leaving that I could go in and get some dip.
But , I didn't, first time I've been there dip-free. Pinged around, made some minor repairs, watched a movie and got a great night's sleep
Family friends coming over to watch SB tonight, shouldn't be a problem, SM is doing the trick for me, so far.
Snow is melting, I'm going for a motorcycle ride and for the first time in a long time, I won't have a dip in!
KTC has been there for me all the way, loving it!
To all my May brothers that sent out the 'keep the faith' texts over the last couple days, I quit with you every day, one day at a time!
Congrats on double digits bro.
Nice job so far sluggo. Keep it up man. You are doing it!
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10 days down, Weekend success! Stared down a few triggers this weekend and won.
Went to Ducks Unlimited Oyster Roast, great party every year, a friend of mine is the host. Had couple beers, lots of dippers there but I had my SM and didn't even get a crave watching all those subtle and not so subtle cancer eaters. Then spent the rest of Saturday at the beach house, alone. Would have been oh so easy to score a can of Cope and enjoy it on the front porch with a nice cocktail. I had to stop for gas at a C. store, didn't even cross my mind until I was leaving that I could go in and get some dip.
But , I didn't, first time I've been there dip-free. Pinged around, made some minor repairs, watched a movie and got a great night's sleep
Family friends coming over to watch SB tonight, shouldn't be a problem, SM is doing the trick for me, so far.
Snow is melting, I'm going for a motorcycle ride and for the first time in a long time, I won't have a dip in!
KTC has been there for me all the way, loving it!
To all my May brothers that sent out the 'keep the faith' texts over the last couple days, I quit with you every day, one day at a time!
Epic weekend, bro -- congrats on sailing into double digits, and doing it on your terms. Keep shining that light on the path for us fresher newbies!
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10 days down, Weekend success! Stared down a few triggers this weekend and won.
Went to Ducks Unlimited Oyster Roast, great party every year, a friend of mine is the host. Had couple beers, lots of dippers there but I had my SM and didn't even get a crave watching all those subtle and not so subtle cancer eaters. Then spent the rest of Saturday at the beach house, alone. Would have been oh so easy to score a can of Cope and enjoy it on the front porch with a nice cocktail. I had to stop for gas at a C. store, didn't even cross my mind until I was leaving that I could go in and get some dip.
But , I didn't, first time I've been there dip-free. Pinged around, made some minor repairs, watched a movie and got a great night's sleep
Family friends coming over to watch SB tonight, shouldn't be a problem, SM is doing the trick for me, so far.
Snow is melting, I'm going for a motorcycle ride and for the first time in a long time, I won't have a dip in!
KTC has been there for me all the way, loving it!
To all my May brothers that sent out the 'keep the faith' texts over the last couple days, I quit with you every day, one day at a time!
Epic weekend, bro -- congrats on sailing into double digits, and doing it on your terms. Keep shining that light on the path for us fresher newbies!
Double digits. Nice Slug.go. Keep pushing forward.
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CVS pharmacies just announced that beginning 10/14 they will no longer sell tobacco products! They're cutting $2 Billion in revenue by doing this...HUGE!!!
CEO said they can't live up to being a pharmacy by selling tobacco...WOW!
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CVS pharmacies just announced that beginning 10/14 they will no longer sell tobacco products! They're cutting $2 Billion in revenue by doing this...HUGE!!!
CEO said they can't live up to being a pharmacy by selling tobacco...WOW!
Time to start supporting CVS! Good for them. ANother big Fuck You to US tobacco! I see an awakening on the horizon.
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Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.
'bang head'
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Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.
'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
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Great story man...it's an honor to be quitting along side you today...my cubicle might be shaking from yanking, but I don't have any nic in here...quit on May bro.
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Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
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Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Yeah Rdad, good call on the "never mind"! My closest story to flying a jet over Irag was the time the full spit cup slid off the 77 Chevy Truck dash and spilled down the naked girl's leg!
Left with this 'jerk'
Slug.go - thanks for your service! Quit with you!
AA
-
Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Ya Sluggo! More stories. I'm all about vicarious adventures!
-
Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Ya Sluggo! More stories. I'm all about vicarious adventures!
Sluggo is flying fighter jets and shit. Bad fuckin ass. More please.
My best story is spitting down in the metal grates inside the glass doors of the freezers in the frozen food aisle of the grocery store and getting spotted by a neighbor who then proceeded to keep talking to me while I had a fat honker of fresh dog shit in and juice running down my chin. She was appalled.
-
Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Ya Sluggo! More stories. I'm all about vicarious adventures!
Sluggo is flying fighter jets and shit. Bad fuckin ass. More please.
My best story is spitting down in the metal grates inside the glass doors of the freezers in the frozen food aisle of the grocery store and getting spotted by a neighbor who then proceeded to keep talking to me while I had a fat honker of fresh dog shit in and juice running down my chin. She was appalled.
Fucking hilarious! Have you ever thought about the people that had to clean up after our dumb asses. God its nice to be clean! What a bunch of dipshits we all were. Pathetic, but kinda funny if you've been there and done that. Sorry Sluggo for raping your thread but most of us don't know how to fly jets. Just how to get caught being stupid. :rolleyes:
-
Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Ya Sluggo! More stories. I'm all about vicarious adventures!
Sluggo is flying fighter jets and shit. Bad fuckin ass. More please.
My best story is spitting down in the metal grates inside the glass doors of the freezers in the frozen food aisle of the grocery store and getting spotted by a neighbor who then proceeded to keep talking to me while I had a fat honker of fresh dog shit in and juice running down my chin. She was appalled.
That's some funny stuff right there! 'crackup'
-
Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Ya Sluggo! More stories. I'm all about vicarious adventures!
Sluggo is flying fighter jets and shit. Bad fuckin ass. More please.
My best story is spitting down in the metal grates inside the glass doors of the freezers in the frozen food aisle of the grocery store and getting spotted by a neighbor who then proceeded to keep talking to me while I had a fat honker of fresh dog shit in and juice running down my chin. She was appalled.
That's some funny stuff right there! 'crackup'
Hey Slug.go.. you ever get any bad maps??? I used to work for DMA
-
Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Ya Sluggo! More stories. I'm all about vicarious adventures!
Sluggo is flying fighter jets and shit. Bad fuckin ass. More please.
My best story is spitting down in the metal grates inside the glass doors of the freezers in the frozen food aisle of the grocery store and getting spotted by a neighbor who then proceeded to keep talking to me while I had a fat honker of fresh dog shit in and juice running down my chin. She was appalled.
That's some funny stuff right there! 'crackup'
Hey Slug.go.. you ever get any bad maps??? I used to work for DMA
I didn't but during the first part of Desert Storm some assets were using the wrong WGS for a while and were slinging bombs all over the place!
-
Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Ya Sluggo! More stories. I'm all about vicarious adventures!
Sluggo is flying fighter jets and shit. Bad fuckin ass. More please.
My best story is spitting down in the metal grates inside the glass doors of the freezers in the frozen food aisle of the grocery store and getting spotted by a neighbor who then proceeded to keep talking to me while I had a fat honker of fresh dog shit in and juice running down my chin. She was appalled.
That's some funny stuff right there! 'crackup'
Hey Slug.go.. you ever get any bad maps??? I used to work for DMA
I didn't but during the first part of Desert Storm some assets were using the wrong WGS for a while and were slinging bombs all over the place!
Great story slug.go! You are winning!
-
Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Ya Sluggo! More stories. I'm all about vicarious adventures!
Sluggo is flying fighter jets and shit. Bad fuckin ass. More please.
My best story is spitting down in the metal grates inside the glass doors of the freezers in the frozen food aisle of the grocery store and getting spotted by a neighbor who then proceeded to keep talking to me while I had a fat honker of fresh dog shit in and juice running down my chin. She was appalled.
That's some funny stuff right there! 'crackup'
Hey Slug.go.. you ever get any bad maps??? I used to work for DMA
I didn't but during the first part of Desert Storm some assets were using the wrong WGS for a while and were slinging bombs all over the place!
Great story slug.go! You are winning!
Please give us more fighter pilot stories.
I laughed my ass off thinking about a fighter pilot having to spit...
-
20 days!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtKydtoLucc (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtKydtoLucc)
-
Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Ya Sluggo! More stories. I'm all about vicarious adventures!
Sluggo is flying fighter jets and shit. Bad fuckin ass. More please.
My best story is spitting down in the metal grates inside the glass doors of the freezers in the frozen food aisle of the grocery store and getting spotted by a neighbor who then proceeded to keep talking to me while I had a fat honker of fresh dog shit in and juice running down my chin. She was appalled.
That's some funny stuff right there! 'crackup'
Hey Slug.go.. you ever get any bad maps??? I used to work for DMA
I didn't but during the first part of Desert Storm some assets were using the wrong WGS for a while and were slinging bombs all over the place!
Great story slug.go! You are winning!
Please give us more fighter pilot stories.
I laughed my ass off thinking about a fighter pilot having to spit...
That is bad ass....
My big fear would be tossing in that one big fatty that trips an internal switch sends you scampering for the potty... Kind of hard when you're strapped into a fighter jet, I would think!
-
Stupid dipping stories.
I was a pilot in the Navy. One 6 month deployment to the Persian Gulf had a night 2 plane mission over Iraq. New guy is scheduled to be my wing man. He asks if he can have the lead, I say sure but you have to do all the planning (which is good for Sluggo).
So, he briefs, we walk to the roof and strap on our aircraft. Night, shitty weather, bad visibility going into Injun Country. Start engines, taxi to catapult...Boom, we're flying. Get to 1,000' and put on night vision goggles and insert fat dip, really fat dip. This was when my chew was Skoal Wintergreen which made me spit...a lot.Â
OK, gotta find my flight lead, go to rendezvous point, solid rain. Fuck, my only job as wing is to find lead and NEVER lose sight. Get radar vectors from ship...Tally ho!
Join on his left wing, cross under to his right side and we instantly enter solid clouds. Now the weather is so shitty that I have to fly very tight Blue Angel-ish formation, no big deal but I can't take my hands off the throttles or stick and I gotta spit. Force a slight swallow, fight the gag, gonna be a long hour and a half. As we enter the airspace, an area we call Microwave Alley is point 1. All the random transmitters and radars there always light up our missile warning gear. I've done this several times and just ignore it. Not our brave lead, he goes bat shit on the controls and I can't lose him or I'll never find him due to the weather. I look like a monkey trying to fuck a greased football trying to maintain position, sweating my ass off and managing these micro-swallows. Surely the weather will get better and I can back off just 5 feet and sneak a real generous spit. Surely not. Dipshit me hangs on to new guy's ever nervous wing as he yanks and banks all over Southern Iraq for an hour, all the while managing an unending series of micro swallows and upset stomach. I'm sweating, pissed off and about to fucking hurl. Finally we head back to Das Boat and we spilt up to prepare for landing. Oh, sweet mercy! Pull out spitter and unload an hour long sponge of nicotine. Drink some water, I have 10 minute until I start down the pipe to the boat. Stomach's recovering, a little. Stopped sweating, might just live after all. So what dumb ol' Sluggo do next? You got it, I put in my 'landing dip'. Some people never learn.Â
 'bang head'
I can relate! ....One time during high school tennis practice......(never mind)
You is a badass sluggo. and an even more badass in my book for being a quitter. I bet you could have flown that mission better not worrying if you were gonna hurl!
Great story sluggo, hilarious follow up rdad. More fighter jet stories, please. 'crackup'
Ya Sluggo! More stories. I'm all about vicarious adventures!
Sluggo is flying fighter jets and shit. Bad fuckin ass. More please.
My best story is spitting down in the metal grates inside the glass doors of the freezers in the frozen food aisle of the grocery store and getting spotted by a neighbor who then proceeded to keep talking to me while I had a fat honker of fresh dog shit in and juice running down my chin. She was appalled.
That's some funny stuff right there! 'crackup'
Hey Slug.go.. you ever get any bad maps??? I used to work for DMA
I didn't but during the first part of Desert Storm some assets were using the wrong WGS for a while and were slinging bombs all over the place!
Great story slug.go! You are winning!
Please give us more fighter pilot stories.
I laughed my ass off thinking about a fighter pilot having to spit...
That is bad ass....
My big fear would be tossing in that one big fatty that trips an internal switch sends you scampering for the potty... Kind of hard when you're strapped into a fighter jet, I would think!
Epic story sluggo.. Proud to be one of your brothers in May 14!
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Day 21, kind of sitting on a cloud, I feel fanfuckingtastic! In a couple text groups that provide hourly support and virtual friendship. I have an immense sense of gratitude for this site and all you fucking idiots today. I work (so to speak) from home and have had a couple SLOW weeks. This has given me the opportunity to hang out in Chat quite a bit.
The fellowship and shit-slinging in there is incredible. Watching a couple grizzled veterans and not so grizzled ones turn a lurker into a quitter in a few minutes is remarkable. We all stared into the abyss of quit, some of us just needed a nudge. KTC will nudge the hell out of you if you let it.
I'm kind of a type A+ personality, alpha male asshole and I don't have too many introspective moments wash over me. But, I had one today. Thanks to all you inmates here at the asylum. I appreciate the opportunity to participate and I'm grateful for what you all have shared with me.
Quit with all of you every damn day.
Now, back to your regularly scheduled program.
Oh, yeah,and...go fuck yourself
'Finger'
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Day 21, kind of sitting on a cloud, I feel fanfuckingtastic! In a couple text groups that provide hourly support and virtual friendship. I have an immense sense of gratitude for this site and all you fucking idiots today. I work (so to speak) from home and have had a couple SLOW weeks. This has given me the opportunity to hang out in Chat quite a bit.
The fellowship and shit-slinging in there is incredible. Watching a couple grizzled veterans and not so grizzled ones turn a lurker into a quitter in a few minutes is remarkable. We all stared into the abyss of quit, some of us just needed a nudge. KTC will nudge the hell out of you if you let it.
I'm kind of a type A+ personality, alpha male asshole and I don't have too many introspective moments wash over me. But, I had one today. Thanks to all you inmates here at the asylum. I appreciate the opportunity to participate and I'm grateful for what you all have shared with me.
Quit with all of you every damn day.
Now, back to your regularly scheduled program.
Oh, yeah,and...go fuck yourself
'Finger'
Great post ghey wad!
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Day 21, kind of sitting on a cloud, I feel fanfuckingtastic! In a couple text groups that provide hourly support and virtual friendship. I have an immense sense of gratitude for this site and all you fucking idiots today. I work (so to speak) from home and have had a couple SLOW weeks. This has given me the opportunity to hang out in Chat quite a bit.
The fellowship and shit-slinging in there is incredible. Watching a couple grizzled veterans and not so grizzled ones turn a lurker into a quitter in a few minutes is remarkable. We all stared into the abyss of quit, some of us just needed a nudge. KTC will nudge the hell out of you if you let it. Â
I'm kind of a type A+ personality, alpha male asshole and I don't have too many introspective moments wash over me. But, I had one today. Thanks to all you inmates here at the asylum. I appreciate the opportunity to participate and I'm grateful for what you all have shared with me.
Quit with all of you every damn day.
Now, back to your regularly scheduled program.
Oh, yeah,and...go fuck yourself
'Finger'
Great post ghey wad!
Blow me, Grizz...again!
-
You should have rolled down your window and tossed your old spitters out over Iraq. I know, it would be impossible...to do much damage, I mean. But it would be gross as Hell to get hit by a super-sonic wintergreen quid.
As far a bad maps, have yall tried Google Maps? I bet you could dial up Bagdad, couln't you? Remember to pin your boat, so you know how to get back.
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Day 21, kind of sitting on a cloud, I feel fanfuckingtastic! In a couple text groups that provide hourly support and virtual friendship. I have an immense sense of gratitude for this site and all you fucking idiots today.  I work (so to speak) from home and have had a couple SLOW weeks. This has given me the opportunity to hang out in Chat quite a bit.
The fellowship and shit-slinging in there is incredible. Watching a couple grizzled veterans and not so grizzled ones turn a lurker into a quitter in a few minutes is remarkable. We all stared into the abyss of quit, some of us just needed a nudge. KTC will nudge the hell out of you if you let it.  Â
I'm kind of a type A+ personality, alpha male asshole and I don't have too many introspective moments wash over me. But, I had one today. Thanks to all you inmates here at the asylum. I appreciate the opportunity to participate and I'm grateful for what you all have shared with me.
Quit with all of you every damn day.
Now, back to your regularly scheduled program.
Oh, yeah,and...go fuck yourself
'Finger'
Great post ghey wad!
Blow me, Grizz...again!
Nice F-in quit you got going there flyboy! Keep it up. QLF!
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That is some funny ass shit there. Way to be slug
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Day 21, kind of sitting on a cloud, I feel fanfuckingtastic! In a couple text groups that provide hourly support and virtual friendship. I have an immense sense of gratitude for this site and all you fucking idiots today. I work (so to speak) from home and have had a couple SLOW weeks. This has given me the opportunity to hang out in Chat quite a bit.
The fellowship and shit-slinging in there is incredible. Watching a couple grizzled veterans and not so grizzled ones turn a lurker into a quitter in a few minutes is remarkable. We all stared into the abyss of quit, some of us just needed a nudge. KTC will nudge the hell out of you if you let it.
I'm kind of a type A+ personality, alpha male asshole and I don't have too many introspective moments wash over me. But, I had one today. Thanks to all you inmates here at the asylum. I appreciate the opportunity to participate and I'm grateful for what you all have shared with me.
Quit with all of you every damn day.
Now, back to your regularly scheduled program.
Oh, yeah,and...go fuck yourself
'Finger'
Amen, brotha. Proud to quit alongside you in Mayhem, and I wait with bated breath the next installment of Slug's Sentimental Horseshit. Keep on keepin' on, bro.
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
Man I am wiping tears out of my eyes....thank you, I keep hearing about constipation on this site, and I went the complete opposite...you used to be able to set your watch to my ass...gas and all over the board now....I am writing a guide book on gas station restrooms between my house and work. 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
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Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
Man I am wiping tears out of my eyes....thank you, I keep hearing about constipation on this site, and I went the complete opposite...you used to be able to set your watch to my ass...gas and all over the board now....I am writing a guide book on gas station restrooms between my house and work. 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
Sam ,
That must suck ass if you are wearing all of your motorcycle gear all of the time like you are supposed to! That's a lot of layers to take off. Kinda risky. Maybe you should just ride around in your underwear. I little road rash would be better than a pantful of runnies.'crackup'
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
Man I am wiping tears out of my eyes....thank you, I keep hearing about constipation on this site, and I went the complete opposite...you used to be able to set your watch to my ass...gas and all over the board now....I am writing a guide book on gas station restrooms between my house and work. 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
Sam ,
That must suck ass if you are wearing all of your motorcycle gear all of the time like you are supposed to! That's a lot of layers to take off. Kinda risky. Maybe you should just ride around in your underwear. I little road rash would be better than a pantful of runnies.'crackup'
OMFG, thank you for that I needed a good laugh today. That is fantastic, love it!
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
Man I am wiping tears out of my eyes....thank you, I keep hearing about constipation on this site, and I went the complete opposite...you used to be able to set your watch to my ass...gas and all over the board now....I am writing a guide book on gas station restrooms between my house and work. 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
Sam ,
That must suck ass if you are wearing all of your motorcycle gear all of the time like you are supposed to! That's a lot of layers to take off. Kinda risky. Maybe you should just ride around in your underwear. I little road rash would be better than a pantful of runnies.'crackup'
OMFG, thank you for that I needed a good laugh today. That is fantastic, love it!
You gotta let us know if you run into this chick again.
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
Man I am wiping tears out of my eyes....thank you, I keep hearing about constipation on this site, and I went the complete opposite...you used to be able to set your watch to my ass...gas and all over the board now....I am writing a guide book on gas station restrooms between my house and work. 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
Sam ,
That must suck ass if you are wearing all of your motorcycle gear all of the time like you are supposed to! That's a lot of layers to take off. Kinda risky. Maybe you should just ride around in your underwear. I little road rash would be better than a pantful of runnies.'crackup'
OMFG, thank you for that I needed a good laugh today. That is fantastic, love it!
You gotta let us know if you run into this chick again.
Bravo! Brav-fucking-O!!
Shakespeare ain't got shit on the way a story should be told, compared to you Sluggo!!
That story completely took away all the rage I was dealing with today!
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
Man I am wiping tears out of my eyes....thank you, I keep hearing about constipation on this site, and I went the complete opposite...you used to be able to set your watch to my ass...gas and all over the board now....I am writing a guide book on gas station restrooms between my house and work. 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
Sam ,
That must suck ass if you are wearing all of your motorcycle gear all of the time like you are supposed to! That's a lot of layers to take off. Kinda risky. Maybe you should just ride around in your underwear. I little road rash would be better than a pantful of runnies.'crackup'
OMFG, thank you for that I needed a good laugh today. That is fantastic, love it!
You gotta let us know if you run into this chick again.
Bravo! Brav-fucking-O!!
Shakespeare ain't got shit on the way a story should be told, compared to you Sluggo!!
That story completely took away all the rage I was dealing with today!
.....my girlfriend told me about this dude at the gym......and um.....I think that I know who it is....... :o
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
Man I am wiping tears out of my eyes....thank you, I keep hearing about constipation on this site, and I went the complete opposite...you used to be able to set your watch to my ass...gas and all over the board now....I am writing a guide book on gas station restrooms between my house and work. 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
Sam ,
That must suck ass if you are wearing all of your motorcycle gear all of the time like you are supposed to! That's a lot of layers to take off. Kinda risky. Maybe you should just ride around in your underwear. I little road rash would be better than a pantful of runnies.'crackup'
OMFG, thank you for that I needed a good laugh today. That is fantastic, love it!
You gotta let us know if you run into this chick again.
Bravo! Brav-fucking-O!!
Shakespeare ain't got shit on the way a story should be told, compared to you Sluggo!!
That story completely took away all the rage I was dealing with today!
.....my girlfriend told me about this dude at the gym......and um.....I think that I know who it is....... :o
Man, this gas post has really got some run. Not much to say about it. I just wanted to get in on the action, bump it up to the top for no particular reason and keep it rolling. Figure it will give me some Saturday quit karma.
Good quit going on in here. Quit on sluggo.
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
Man I am wiping tears out of my eyes....thank you, I keep hearing about constipation on this site, and I went the complete opposite...you used to be able to set your watch to my ass...gas and all over the board now....I am writing a guide book on gas station restrooms between my house and work. 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
Sam ,
That must suck ass if you are wearing all of your motorcycle gear all of the time like you are supposed to! That's a lot of layers to take off. Kinda risky. Maybe you should just ride around in your underwear. I little road rash would be better than a pantful of runnies.'crackup'
OMFG, thank you for that I needed a good laugh today. That is fantastic, love it!
You gotta let us know if you run into this chick again.
Bravo! Brav-fucking-O!!
Shakespeare ain't got shit on the way a story should be told, compared to you Sluggo!!
That story completely took away all the rage I was dealing with today!
.....my girlfriend told me about this dude at the gym......and um.....I think that I know who it is....... :o
Man, this gas post has really got some run. Not much to say about it. I just wanted to get in on the action, bump it up to the top for no particular reason and keep it rolling. Figure it will give me some Saturday quit karma.
Good quit going on in here. Quit on sluggo.
Sluggo, we could use a good story today!
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
Man I am wiping tears out of my eyes....thank you, I keep hearing about constipation on this site, and I went the complete opposite...you used to be able to set your watch to my ass...gas and all over the board now....I am writing a guide book on gas station restrooms between my house and work. 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
Sam ,
That must suck ass if you are wearing all of your motorcycle gear all of the time like you are supposed to! That's a lot of layers to take off. Kinda risky. Maybe you should just ride around in your underwear. I little road rash would be better than a pantful of runnies.'crackup'
OMFG, thank you for that I needed a good laugh today. That is fantastic, love it!
You gotta let us know if you run into this chick again.
Bravo! Brav-fucking-O!!
Shakespeare ain't got shit on the way a story should be told, compared to you Sluggo!!
That story completely took away all the rage I was dealing with today!
.....my girlfriend told me about this dude at the gym......and um.....I think that I know who it is....... :o
Man, this gas post has really got some run. Not much to say about it. I just wanted to get in on the action, bump it up to the top for no particular reason and keep it rolling. Figure it will give me some Saturday quit karma.
Good quit going on in here. Quit on sluggo.
Sluggo, we could use a good story today!
Now that is good story telling. I feel like I was there and saw the hole thing. LOL!!!!!!!
-
Just had to share this…Since my quit began I've had the absolute foulest gas of my life. The "If I had a dog, I wouldn't blame this on him" kind of flatulence.
I eat super clean, no wheat, no processed food, no fast food. Fighting this bitch, though, has got my bowels in a tectonic shift. A shift so massive that today I nasally assaulted a hottie at the gym. I'm on the treadmill grinding out my cardio and 10 minutes in a 7 face/9 body mounts the treadmill next to mine since it was the only one open at the time. I'm married so I really don't care, give her the nonchalant nod and soldier on. Ten minutes later, iPod streaming, ESPN on the little TV…I feel it coming on. I'm drenched in sweat, 40 minutes to go, trying my best to hold this thing in. Last thing I want to do is shart myself in the gym…I'm wearing shorts, got the visual?
Well, I try the one cheek sneak, and it works, a little. But trying to deliver this volume of putrid gas 25ml at a time isn't going to happen. But, I can't go full auto or everyone's going to the E.R. Over the course of the next 15 minutes I delivered a steady stream of putrefaction rivaled only by Fat Bastard. Since the treadmill next to our heroine is now empty, it's obvious that I'm the source. I couldn't blame it on her, she knows…she knows.
Alas, their is a limit to her nasal capacity. She gets off her treadmill and GOES DIRECTLY to a now empty one at the end of the line! No fake trip to the can, fake phone call or fake stretching! I was so proud and ashamed at the same time.
Guess i need to dye my hair now. But how do you dye a bald spot?
'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup' I can't even get girls to look at me anymore. Good job!
That's freaking hilarious bro! I remember the gas, in fact I kept it till about day 200. I also eat healthy no fast food, wheat, processed foods! Thanks for sharing that funny event with us! Rock on!
Fucking hilarious. 'crackup'
Thanks sluggo... That story is burnt in my memory now. Funny thing is.. I would have played it the same way ......... Man gotta do what man gotta do..The rest of the world can try and understand.. or not
200 days? 200 days? Hell, I'm going to move down wind of either a paper mill or a hog slaughtering facility. I almost had to put on my NBC warfare gear and break out the atropine. I know most of us are proud of their 'scent', but this was just fucking ridiculous. It was so powerful, the smell morphed into a taste.
Probably have to pay for a new paint job at the gym.
Pinched, I have friends who fly for SWA, I'll alert them. Does TSA know?
Easy slug go - I only had it for a couple days. But one thing for sure ...twas hell from whence it came,of that I'm certain...
This is one of the greatest fart stories ever!
I was reading your thread hoping to find another awesome fighter pilot story. When I read this shit, I laughed so hard it became an uncontrollable giggle.
That's our Sluggo! The Flatulent Fighter Pilot! 'crackup'
Man I am wiping tears out of my eyes....thank you, I keep hearing about constipation on this site, and I went the complete opposite...you used to be able to set your watch to my ass...gas and all over the board now....I am writing a guide book on gas station restrooms between my house and work. 'crackup' 'crackup' 'crackup'
Sam ,
That must suck ass if you are wearing all of your motorcycle gear all of the time like you are supposed to! That's a lot of layers to take off. Kinda risky. Maybe you should just ride around in your underwear. I little road rash would be better than a pantful of runnies.'crackup'
OMFG, thank you for that I needed a good laugh today. That is fantastic, love it!
You gotta let us know if you run into this chick again.
Bravo! Brav-fucking-O!!
Shakespeare ain't got shit on the way a story should be told, compared to you Sluggo!!
That story completely took away all the rage I was dealing with today!
.....my girlfriend told me about this dude at the gym......and um.....I think that I know who it is....... :o
Man, this gas post has really got some run. Not much to say about it. I just wanted to get in on the action, bump it up to the top for no particular reason and keep it rolling. Figure it will give me some Saturday quit karma.
Good quit going on in here. Quit on sluggo.
Sluggo, we could use a good story today!
Now that is good story telling. I feel like I was there and saw the hole thing. LOL!!!!!!!
I farted today and..... dammit , i thought of this story and had to come back and read it again.... I'm proud to be quit with you slugs....
-
Time for meet up isn't it? Derk40 is 27 minutes away according to google gps. Layers of accountability is important.
-
Quick story.
Back in the day, it seemed everybody in the Navy was a dipper. I was sitting the Alert 5 on the boat. You already preflighted the aircraft, did a full systems check and are strapped in, all you have to do is start engines and you're gone. Alert 5 means you have to be able to get airborne in 5 minutes or less.
Anyway, it was a gorgeous day, not too loud on the flight deck, not much going on. Had canopy open, just enjoying the view. Across from me was friend of mine, Horse. Horse is a big dipper, I can see him spitting into a bottle that was tucked into his survival vest pocket. His canopy is open, too. Your head is about 10 feet above the ground when you're seated in the plane
Well, here comes Horse's Commanding Officer (CO) wearing his khaki uniform. We're just fucking off giving each other obscene hand signals and razzing each other on the radio. Horse and the CO are trying to have a conversation, but there's just too much ambient noise. Due to Alert 5 status, not allowed to lower boarding ladder without permission from Air Boss in tower. Horse takes his helmet off, still can't understand each other. CO motions for Horse to lean over. Horse unstraps, leans over and drops a stream of spent spit on his CO's starched khaki shirt!!! Hilarity ensued! I'm laughing so hard I'm afraid I'm going to shit myself. The CO is fucking screaming at Horse!!! His face was so red it was almost purple. I get Horse's back seater on the radio. He wasn't paying attention, buried in his radar. I tell Tiny (back seater) what's happening. He peeks over the side and then leans as far forward as he can, basically ducking so the CO won't see him busting out laughing. Everyone but Horse and the CO are basically dying at this point, everyone is all over the radio talking about it. Finally, the CO's rant ends, he stomps off the flight deck.
After the hilarity died down, I wiped my eyes and called Horse. "Horse, you are so fucked." Horse said, 'You have no idea. If we go flying, it might not bother me to get shot down, Saddam's got nothing on my CO.'
We didn't go flying. Dipping was banned in Horse's squadron aircraft. I can still see it all in my mind.
Beautiful.
-
Quick story.
Back in the day, it seemed everybody in the Navy was a dipper. I was sitting the Alert 5 on the boat. You already preflighted the aircraft, did a full systems check and are strapped in, all you have to do is start engines and you're gone. Alert 5 means you have to be able to get airborne in 5 minutes or less.
Anyway, it was a gorgeous day, not too loud on the flight deck, not much going on. Had canopy open, just enjoying the view. Across from me was friend of mine, Horse. Horse is a big dipper, I can see him spitting into a bottle that was tucked into his survival vest pocket. His canopy is open, too. Your head is about 10 feet above the ground when you're seated in the plane
Well, here comes Horse's Commanding Officer (CO) wearing his khaki uniform. We're just fucking off giving each other obscene hand signals and razzing each other on the radio. Horse and the CO are trying to have a conversation, but there's just too much ambient noise. Due to Alert 5 status, not allowed to lower boarding ladder without permission from Air Boss in tower. Horse takes his helmet off, still can't understand each other. CO motions for Horse to lean over. Horse unstraps, leans over and drops a stream of spent spit on his CO's starched khaki shirt!!! Hilarity ensued! I'm laughing so hard I'm afraid I'm going to shit myself. The CO is fucking screaming at Horse!!! His face was so red it was almost purple. I get Horse's back seater on the radio. He wasn't paying attention, buried in his radar. I tell Tiny (back seater) what's happening. He peeks over the side and then leans as far forward as he can, basically ducking so the CO won't see him busting out laughing. Everyone but Horse and the CO are basically dying at this point, everyone is all over the radio talking about it. Finally, the CO's rant ends, he stomps off the flight deck.
After the hilarity died down, I wiped my eyes and called Horse. "Horse, you are so fucked." Horse said, 'You have no idea. If we go flying, it might not bother me to get shot down, Saddam's got nothing on my CO.'
We didn't go flying. Dipping was banned in Horse's squadron aircraft. I can still see it all in my mind.Â
Beautiful.
I needed a good laugh. That did it! Thx for the stories slug.
-
Quick story.
Back in the day, it seemed everybody in the Navy was a dipper. I was sitting the Alert 5 on the boat. You already preflighted the aircraft, did a full systems check and are strapped in, all you have to do is start engines and you're gone. Alert 5 means you have to be able to get airborne in 5 minutes or less.
Anyway, it was a gorgeous day, not too loud on the flight deck, not much going on. Had canopy open, just enjoying the view. Across from me was friend of mine, Horse. Horse is a big dipper, I can see him spitting into a bottle that was tucked into his survival vest pocket. His canopy is open, too. Your head is about 10 feet above the ground when you're seated in the plane
Well, here comes Horse's Commanding Officer (CO) wearing his khaki uniform. We're just fucking off giving each other obscene hand signals and razzing each other on the radio. Horse and the CO are trying to have a conversation, but there's just too much ambient noise. Due to Alert 5 status, not allowed to lower boarding ladder without permission from Air Boss in tower. Horse takes his helmet off, still can't understand each other. CO motions for Horse to lean over. Horse unstraps, leans over and drops a stream of spent spit on his CO's starched khaki shirt!!! Hilarity ensued! I'm laughing so hard I'm afraid I'm going to shit myself. The CO is fucking screaming at Horse!!! His face was so red it was almost purple. I get Horse's back seater on the radio. He wasn't paying attention, buried in his radar. I tell Tiny (back seater) what's happening. He peeks over the side and then leans as far forward as he can, basically ducking so the CO won't see him busting out laughing. Everyone but Horse and the CO are basically dying at this point, everyone is all over the radio talking about it. Finally, the CO's rant ends, he stomps off the flight deck.
After the hilarity died down, I wiped my eyes and called Horse. "Horse, you are so fucked." Horse said, 'You have no idea. If we go flying, it might not bother me to get shot down, Saddam's got nothing on my CO.'
We didn't go flying. Dipping was banned in Horse's squadron aircraft. I can still see it all in my mind.Â
Beautiful.
I needed a good laugh. That did it! Thx for the stories slug.
hahahaha!!!!! Thank you so much for another fighter pilot dipping story. That shit just made my day!!! I bet Horse never again tucked a spitter into his survival vest...fucking priceless
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Let y'all in on a not so well kept secret - may quitters and quit groups are the best. Slug.go, you fit in nicely. Keep killing it.
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5-0 for Slug.gO...
Congrats bro -- great to quit alongside you, and here's to many more nic-free mini-milestones. See you on roll in the AM.
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Shit, I need to keep coming back here for the laughs if nothing else. Congrats on 50 Slug, keep it up brother. I quit with you every day.
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Great job on 50! Half way to HOF...Nice!
mb289
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Thanks, to all you guys.
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Thanks, to all you guys.
Hey slug, congratulations on your milestone... Robbie
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Thanks, to all you guys.
Hey slug, congratulations on your milestone... Robbie
Nice job .go
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Thanks, to all you guys.
Hey slug, congratulations on your milestone... Robbie
Nice job .go
Good work Farter!
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Thanks, to all you guys.
Hey slug, congratulations on your milestone... Robbie
Nice job .go
Good work Faster!
Does Reader's Digest still have that "Humor in Uniform" section? You could be getting like $300 a pop for these stories. Congrats on 50 this week!
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Slug, I think your 55 today.... lets hear from you. Give us a story.
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Slug, I think your 55 today.... lets hear from you. Give us a story.
Yeah. Come on man. We are due for a classic sluggo tale.
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Slug, I think your 55 today.... lets hear from you. Give us a story.
Yeah. Come on man. We are due for a classic sluggo tale.
Got the camp fire lit, s'mores are ready to go, come on Uncle Slug tell us a story.
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Slug, I think your 55 today.... lets hear from you. Give us a story.
Yeah. Come on man. We are due for a classic sluggo tale.
Got the camp fire lit, s'mores are ready to go, come on Uncle Slug tell us a story.
.go, I have the popcorn....come on!
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Slug, I think your 55 today.... lets hear from you. Give us a story.
Yeah. Come on man. We are due for a classic sluggo tale.
Got the camp fire lit, s'mores are ready to go, come on Uncle Slug tell us a story.
.go, I have the popcorn....come on!
'Popcorn'
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Slug, I think your 55 today.... lets hear from you. Give us a story.
Yeah. Come on man. We are due for a classic sluggo tale.
Got the camp fire lit, s'mores are ready to go, come on Uncle Slug tell us a story.
.go, I have the popcorn....come on!
'Popcorn'
Back to the front of the class until you give a story...
-
Slug, I think your 55 today.... lets hear from you. Give us a story.
Yeah. Come on man. We are due for a classic sluggo tale.
Got the camp fire lit, s'mores are ready to go, come on Uncle Slug tell us a story.
.go, I have the popcorn....come on!
'Popcorn'
Back to the front of the class until you give a story...
'Popcorn' yah, c'mon sluggo we know you have more stories. Lighten up our weekend! :P
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Sitting here trying to kill time and an eventful weekend comes to mind.
Supposed to fly from VA to Pensacola for a weekend airshow. Gorgeous early Summer Friday, we fly a low level route. Get on first point of the route somewhere in Southern NC. Allowed to fly as low as 200', speed can't be supersonic. Fuel isn't too much of an issue, we're only going to be low for 20-30 minutes, then climb up with the airliners for last 2-300 miles. We're boogying along, about 100' (remember when I just said 'as low as 200', that might come to bite your humble scribe), 450 knots or so and it's time to climb up to Mogul's airliner altitude and soar with our new quitter, Airbus Pilot. The instant we begin to climb, a thin black streak shows up right in front of me, the fiberglass nose explodes and I hear and feel a big 'Clunk'. Engine instruments are normal but something isn't quite right and Old Slug.go is puzzled. Other guy, Chub, says something about 'We need to get out of here.' Well, I'm thinking he thinks we need to eject. Fuck, no, you are not! I tell him 'No, stay with the jet.' You never say 'Don't eject', because if the other guy doesn't hear 'Don't', yer fooked. He says, 'I mean we need to get higher, now!' Well, during this exchange we had probably gained 5,000 feet with a 6 G pull so the point was moot. All right, now, what the fuck just happened? We figured we had hit a power line or something, like one of those really big ones you see that are 200' in the air. Radar is dead, because that big CLUNK was the sound of the radar breaking the power line after it blew through the nose. Now radar has 400 knots of wind blowing on it and it's broken. This is getting expensive. OK, can't make it to Pensacola, where is nearest military field...USN/USAF base near ATL. We tell Center we're declaring an emergency, headed to military field. Landing gear indicator shows nose gear not down, well fuck, this is really going to be expensive. Overhead the field another aircraft that was airborne comes up and checks our landing gear out. The guy tells us, in the best Jeff Spicoli voice, 'Dude, you're pretty fucked up'. Nice, is that your professional opinion? But, God loves fools and drunks...landing gear was down. We land, limp our crippled jet to Base Operations. As we're getting out, a Navy Captain in dress uniform walks up to us and says, 'Boys, come with me'. We know we are just fucked. He escorts us to the back of the jet, away from the crowd, looks us right in the eye and says, 'The most important thing for you to do is get your story straight.' Win! 'Sir, we've been working on that for 20 minutes', says Chub. 'Good'. He turns and leaves.
After any accident you have to give blood and piss, no problem. Chub, big tough Irish guy, is deathly afraid of needles and PASSES OUT!
More good karma, my best man from my wedding lives in Atlanta and he picks us up and houses us for the night.
We need to start drinking, before reality sets in. We go to a bar called 'Beer Mug', Chub hooks with some chick. He claims he took her out to the parking lot and did her doggy style over the hood of my friend's car, a Ford. We start calling her 'droF' when she finally came back in, because ford backwards is what is probably pressed into her stomach.
Remember that 200' thing? Well we were at 100', if not lower, but the actual altitude of the power line we hit (in a climb) was 205'. The fact we were in a climb never came out of the investigation. I would survive to fuck up again.
God loves fools and drunks.
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Love these stories Slug. I certainly can say that I have not lived life on the edge quite like you; much respect. However we have both lived on the edge of life when it comes to the nic bitch. We also are saving our lives the same, ODAAT EDD.
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Sitting here trying to kill time and an eventful weekend comes to mind.
Supposed to fly from VA to Pensacola for a weekend airshow. Gorgeous early Summer Friday, we fly a low level route. Get on first point of the route somewhere in Southern NC. Allowed to fly as low as 200', speed can't be supersonic. Fuel isn't too much of an issue, we're only going to be low for 20-30 minutes, then climb up with the airliners for last 2-300 miles. We're boogying along, about 100' (remember when I just said 'as low as 200', that might come to bite your humble scribe), 450 knots or so and it's time to climb up to Mogul's airliner altitude and soar with our new quitter, Airbus Pilot. The instant we begin to climb, a thin black streak shows up right in front of me, the fiberglass nose explodes and I hear and feel a big 'Clunk'. Engine instruments are normal but something isn't quite right and Old Slug.go is puzzled. Other guy, Chub, says something about 'We need to get out of here.' Well, I'm thinking he thinks we need to eject. Fuck, no, you are not! I tell him 'No, stay with the jet.' You never say 'Don't eject', because if the other guy doesn't hear 'Don't', yer fooked. He says, 'I mean we need to get higher, now!' Well, during this exchange we had probably gained 5,000 feet with a 6 G pull so the point was moot. All right, now, what the fuck just happened? We figured we had hit a power line or something, like one of those really big ones you see that are 200' in the air. Radar is dead, because that big CLUNK was the sound of the radar breaking the power line after it blew through the nose. Now radar has 400 knots of wind blowing on it and it's broken. This is getting expensive. OK, can't make it to Pensacola, where is nearest military field...USN/USAF base near ATL. We tell Center we're declaring an emergency, headed to military field. Landing gear indicator shows nose gear not down, well fuck, this is really going to be expensive. Overhead the field another aircraft that was airborne comes up and checks our landing gear out. The guy tells us, in the best Jeff Spicoli voice, 'Dude, you're pretty fucked up'. Nice, is that your professional opinion? But, God loves fools and drunks...landing gear was down. We land, limp our crippled jet to Base Operations. As we're getting out, a Navy Captain in dress uniform walks up to us and says, 'Boys, come with me'. We know we are just fucked. He escorts us to the back of the jet, away from the crowd, looks us right in the eye and says, 'The most important thing for you to do is get your story straight.' Win! 'Sir, we've been working on that for 20 minutes', says Chub. 'Good'. He turns and leaves.
After any accident you have to give blood and piss, no problem. Chub, big tough Irish guy, is deathly afraid of needles and PASSES OUT!
More good karma, my best man from my wedding lives in Atlanta and he picks us up and houses us for the night.
We need to start drinking, before reality sets in. We go to a bar called 'Beer Mug', Chub hooks with some chick. He claims he took her out to the parking lot and did her doggy style over the hood of my friend's car, a Ford. We start calling her 'droF' when she finally came back in, because ford backwards is what is probably pressed into her stomach.
Remember that 200' thing? Well we were at 100', if not lower, but the actual altitude of the power line we hit (in a climb) was 205'. The fact we were in a climb never came out of the investigation. I would survive to fuck up again.
God loves fools and drunks.
Damn. I think I would have to clean out my drawers after that!
-
Sitting here trying to kill time and an eventful weekend comes to mind.
Supposed to fly from VA to Pensacola for a weekend airshow. Gorgeous early Summer Friday, we fly a low level route. Get on first point of the route somewhere in Southern NC. Allowed to fly as low as 200', speed can't be supersonic. Fuel isn't too much of an issue, we're only going to be low for 20-30 minutes, then climb up with the airliners for last 2-300 miles. We're boogying along, about 100' (remember when I just said 'as low as 200', that might come to bite your humble scribe), 450 knots or so and it's time to climb up to Mogul's airliner altitude and soar with our new quitter, Airbus Pilot. The instant we begin to climb, a thin black streak shows up right in front of me, the fiberglass nose explodes and I hear and feel a big 'Clunk'. Engine instruments are normal but something isn't quite right and Old Slug.go is puzzled. Other guy, Chub, says something about 'We need to get out of here.' Well, I'm thinking he thinks we need to eject. Fuck, no, you are not! I tell him 'No, stay with the jet.' You never say 'Don't eject', because if the other guy doesn't hear 'Don't', yer fooked. He says, 'I mean we need to get higher, now!' Well, during this exchange we had probably gained 5,000 feet with a 6 G pull so the point was moot. All right, now, what the fuck just happened? We figured we had hit a power line or something, like one of those really big ones you see that are 200' in the air. Radar is dead, because that big CLUNK was the sound of the radar breaking the power line after it blew through the nose. Now radar has 400 knots of wind blowing on it and it's broken. This is getting expensive. OK, can't make it to Pensacola, where is nearest military field...USN/USAF base near ATL. We tell Center we're declaring an emergency, headed to military field. Landing gear indicator shows nose gear not down, well fuck, this is really going to be expensive. Overhead the field another aircraft that was airborne comes up and checks our landing gear out. The guy tells us, in the best Jeff Spicoli voice, 'Dude, you're pretty fucked up'. Nice, is that your professional opinion? But, God loves fools and drunks...landing gear was down. We land, limp our crippled jet to Base Operations. As we're getting out, a Navy Captain in dress uniform walks up to us and says, 'Boys, come with me'. We know we are just fucked. He escorts us to the back of the jet, away from the crowd, looks us right in the eye and says, 'The most important thing for you to do is get your story straight.' Win! 'Sir, we've been working on that for 20 minutes', says Chub. 'Good'. He turns and leaves.Â
After any accident you have to give blood and piss, no problem. Chub, big tough Irish guy, is deathly afraid of needles and PASSES OUT!
More good karma, my best man from my wedding lives in Atlanta and he picks us up and houses us for the night.
We need to start drinking, before reality sets in. We go to a bar called 'Beer Mug', Chub hooks with some chick. He claims he took her out to the parking lot and did her doggy style over the hood of my friend's car, a Ford. We start calling her 'droF' when she finally came back in, because ford backwards is what is probably pressed into her stomach.
Remember that 200' thing? Well we were at 100', if not lower, but the actual altitude of the power line we hit (in a climb) was 205'. The fact we were in a climb never came out of the investigation. I would survive to fuck up again.
God loves fools and drunks.
Damn. I think I would have to clean out my drawers after that!
That's insane. You're a damn ghost.
-
Sitting here trying to kill time and an eventful weekend comes to mind.
Supposed to fly from VA to Pensacola for a weekend airshow. Gorgeous early Summer Friday, we fly a low level route. Get on first point of the route somewhere in Southern NC. Allowed to fly as low as 200', speed can't be supersonic. Fuel isn't too much of an issue, we're only going to be low for 20-30 minutes, then climb up with the airliners for last 2-300 miles. We're boogying along, about 100' (remember when I just said 'as low as 200', that might come to bite your humble scribe), 450 knots or so and it's time to climb up to Mogul's airliner altitude and soar with our new quitter, Airbus Pilot. The instant we begin to climb, a thin black streak shows up right in front of me, the fiberglass nose explodes and I hear and feel a big 'Clunk'. Engine instruments are normal but something isn't quite right and Old Slug.go is puzzled. Other guy, Chub, says something about 'We need to get out of here.' Well, I'm thinking he thinks we need to eject. Fuck, no, you are not! I tell him 'No, stay with the jet.' You never say 'Don't eject', because if the other guy doesn't hear 'Don't', yer fooked. He says, 'I mean we need to get higher, now!' Well, during this exchange we had probably gained 5,000 feet with a 6 G pull so the point was moot. All right, now, what the fuck just happened? We figured we had hit a power line or something, like one of those really big ones you see that are 200' in the air. Radar is dead, because that big CLUNK was the sound of the radar breaking the power line after it blew through the nose.  Now radar has 400 knots of wind blowing on it and it's broken. This is getting expensive. OK, can't make it to Pensacola, where is nearest military field...USN/USAF base near ATL. We tell Center we're declaring an emergency, headed to military field. Landing gear indicator shows nose gear not down, well fuck, this is really going to be expensive. Overhead the field another aircraft that was airborne comes up and checks our landing gear out. The guy tells us, in the best Jeff Spicoli voice, 'Dude, you're pretty fucked up'. Nice, is that your professional opinion? But, God loves fools and drunks...landing gear was down. We land, limp our crippled jet to Base Operations. As we're getting out, a Navy Captain in dress uniform walks up to us and says, 'Boys, come with me'. We know we are just fucked.  He escorts us to the back of the jet, away from the crowd, looks us right in the eye and says, 'The most important thing for you to do is get your story straight.' Win! 'Sir, we've been working on that for 20 minutes', says Chub. 'Good'. He turns and leaves.Â
After any accident you have to give blood and piss, no problem. Chub, big tough Irish guy, is deathly afraid of needles and PASSES OUT!
More good karma, my best man from my wedding lives in Atlanta and he picks us up and houses us for the night.
We need to start drinking, before reality sets in. We go to a bar called 'Beer Mug', Chub hooks with some chick. He claims he took her out to the parking lot and did her doggy style over the hood of my friend's car, a Ford. We start calling her 'droF' when she finally came back in, because ford backwards is what is probably pressed into her stomach.
Remember that 200' thing? Well we were at 100', if not lower, but the actual altitude of the power line we hit (in a climb) was 205'. The fact we were in a climb never came out of the investigation. I would survive to fuck up again.
God loves fools and drunks.
Damn. I think I would have to clean out my drawers after that!
That's insane. You're a damn ghost.
Better than "Shades of Grey"....... QLF
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Slug if you would write a romance novel, I think that I would buy a copy.....
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Slug if you would write a romance novel, I think that I would buy a copy.....
That's disturbing on several levels...
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Slug if you would write a romance novel, I think that I would buy a copy.....
That's disturbing on several levels...
Good one slug.go. Thanks!
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Slug if you would write a romance novel, I think that I would buy a copy.....
That's disturbing on several levels...
Good one slug.go. Thanks!
That's the way to start my day. drof...love it. Going to try and take this day just above the power lines!
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Sitting here trying to kill time and an eventful weekend comes to mind.
Supposed to fly from VA to Pensacola for a weekend airshow. Gorgeous early Summer Friday, we fly a low level route. Get on first point of the route somewhere in Southern NC. Allowed to fly as low as 200', speed can't be supersonic. Fuel isn't too much of an issue, we're only going to be low for 20-30 minutes, then climb up with the airliners for last 2-300 miles. We're boogying along, about 100' (remember when I just said 'as low as 200', that might come to bite your humble scribe), 450 knots or so and it's time to climb up to Mogul's airliner altitude and soar with our new quitter, Airbus Pilot. The instant we begin to climb, a thin black streak shows up right in front of me, the fiberglass nose explodes and I hear and feel a big 'Clunk'. Engine instruments are normal but something isn't quite right and Old Slug.go is puzzled. Other guy, Chub, says something about 'We need to get out of here.' Well, I'm thinking he thinks we need to eject. Fuck, no, you are not! I tell him 'No, stay with the jet.' You never say 'Don't eject', because if the other guy doesn't hear 'Don't', yer fooked. He says, 'I mean we need to get higher, now!' Well, during this exchange we had probably gained 5,000 feet with a 6 G pull so the point was moot. All right, now, what the fuck just happened? We figured we had hit a power line or something, like one of those really big ones you see that are 200' in the air. Radar is dead, because that big CLUNK was the sound of the radar breaking the power line after it blew through the nose.  Now radar has 400 knots of wind blowing on it and it's broken. This is getting expensive. OK, can't make it to Pensacola, where is nearest military field...USN/USAF base near ATL. We tell Center we're declaring an emergency, headed to military field. Landing gear indicator shows nose gear not down, well fuck, this is really going to be expensive. Overhead the field another aircraft that was airborne comes up and checks our landing gear out. The guy tells us, in the best Jeff Spicoli voice, 'Dude, you're pretty fucked up'. Nice, is that your professional opinion? But, God loves fools and drunks...landing gear was down. We land, limp our crippled jet to Base Operations. As we're getting out, a Navy Captain in dress uniform walks up to us and says, 'Boys, come with me'. We know we are just fucked.  He escorts us to the back of the jet, away from the crowd, looks us right in the eye and says, 'The most important thing for you to do is get your story straight.' Win! 'Sir, we've been working on that for 20 minutes', says Chub. 'Good'. He turns and leaves.Â
After any accident you have to give blood and piss, no problem. Chub, big tough Irish guy, is deathly afraid of needles and PASSES OUT!
More good karma, my best man from my wedding lives in Atlanta and he picks us up and houses us for the night.
We need to start drinking, before reality sets in. We go to a bar called 'Beer Mug', Chub hooks with some chick. He claims he took her out to the parking lot and did her doggy style over the hood of my friend's car, a Ford. We start calling her 'droF' when she finally came back in, because ford backwards is what is probably pressed into her stomach.
Remember that 200' thing? Well we were at 100', if not lower, but the actual altitude of the power line we hit (in a climb) was 205'. The fact we were in a climb never came out of the investigation. I would survive to fuck up again.
God loves fools and drunks.
Damn. I think I would have to clean out my drawers after that!
That's insane. You're a damn ghost.
Better than "Shades of Grey"....... QLF
Em, find 'the guy's guide to 50 shades of grey' book online, about 50 pages...hilarious!
-
Sitting here trying to kill time and an eventful weekend comes to mind.
Supposed to fly from VA to Pensacola for a weekend airshow. Gorgeous early Summer Friday, we fly a low level route. Get on first point of the route somewhere in Southern NC. Allowed to fly as low as 200', speed can't be supersonic. Fuel isn't too much of an issue, we're only going to be low for 20-30 minutes, then climb up with the airliners for last 2-300 miles. We're boogying along, about 100' (remember when I just said 'as low as 200', that might come to bite your humble scribe), 450 knots or so and it's time to climb up to Mogul's airliner altitude and soar with our new quitter, Airbus Pilot. The instant we begin to climb, a thin black streak shows up right in front of me, the fiberglass nose explodes and I hear and feel a big 'Clunk'. Engine instruments are normal but something isn't quite right and Old Slug.go is puzzled. Other guy, Chub, says something about 'We need to get out of here.' Well, I'm thinking he thinks we need to eject. Fuck, no, you are not! I tell him 'No, stay with the jet.' You never say 'Don't eject', because if the other guy doesn't hear 'Don't', yer fooked. He says, 'I mean we need to get higher, now!' Well, during this exchange we had probably gained 5,000 feet with a 6 G pull so the point was moot. All right, now, what the fuck just happened? We figured we had hit a power line or something, like one of those really big ones you see that are 200' in the air. Radar is dead, because that big CLUNK was the sound of the radar breaking the power line after it blew through the nose.  Now radar has 400 knots of wind blowing on it and it's broken. This is getting expensive. OK, can't make it to Pensacola, where is nearest military field...USN/USAF base near ATL. We tell Center we're declaring an emergency, headed to military field. Landing gear indicator shows nose gear not down, well fuck, this is really going to be expensive. Overhead the field another aircraft that was airborne comes up and checks our landing gear out. The guy tells us, in the best Jeff Spicoli voice, 'Dude, you're pretty fucked up'. Nice, is that your professional opinion? But, God loves fools and drunks...landing gear was down. We land, limp our crippled jet to Base Operations. As we're getting out, a Navy Captain in dress uniform walks up to us and says, 'Boys, come with me'. We know we are just fucked.  He escorts us to the back of the jet, away from the crowd, looks us right in the eye and says, 'The most important thing for you to do is get your story straight.' Win! 'Sir, we've been working on that for 20 minutes', says Chub. 'Good'. He turns and leaves.Â
After any accident you have to give blood and piss, no problem. Chub, big tough Irish guy, is deathly afraid of needles and PASSES OUT!
More good karma, my best man from my wedding lives in Atlanta and he picks us up and houses us for the night.
We need to start drinking, before reality sets in. We go to a bar called 'Beer Mug', Chub hooks with some chick. He claims he took her out to the parking lot and did her doggy style over the hood of my friend's car, a Ford. We start calling her 'droF' when she finally came back in, because ford backwards is what is probably pressed into her stomach.
Remember that 200' thing? Well we were at 100', if not lower, but the actual altitude of the power line we hit (in a climb) was 205'. The fact we were in a climb never came out of the investigation. I would survive to fuck up again.
God loves fools and drunks.
Damn. I think I would have to clean out my drawers after that!
That's insane. You're a damn ghost.
Better than "Shades of Grey"....... QLF
Em, find 'the guy's guide to 50 shades of grey' book online, about 50 pages...hilarious!
So...you posted your confession to a very public board? What was that thing about Fools you was talking bout?
Pretty kewl story tho. Fag.
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Sitting here trying to kill time and an eventful weekend comes to mind.
Supposed to fly from VA to Pensacola for a weekend airshow. Gorgeous early Summer Friday, we fly a low level route. Get on first point of the route somewhere in Southern NC. Allowed to fly as low as 200', speed can't be supersonic. Fuel isn't too much of an issue, we're only going to be low for 20-30 minutes, then climb up with the airliners for last 2-300 miles. We're boogying along, about 100' (remember when I just said 'as low as 200', that might come to bite your humble scribe), 450 knots or so and it's time to climb up to Mogul's airliner altitude and soar with our new quitter, Airbus Pilot. The instant we begin to climb, a thin black streak shows up right in front of me, the fiberglass nose explodes and I hear and feel a big 'Clunk'. Engine instruments are normal but something isn't quite right and Old Slug.go is puzzled. Other guy, Chub, says something about 'We need to get out of here.' Well, I'm thinking he thinks we need to eject. Fuck, no, you are not! I tell him 'No, stay with the jet.' You never say 'Don't eject', because if the other guy doesn't hear 'Don't', yer fooked. He says, 'I mean we need to get higher, now!' Well, during this exchange we had probably gained 5,000 feet with a 6 G pull so the point was moot. All right, now, what the fuck just happened? We figured we had hit a power line or something, like one of those really big ones you see that are 200' in the air. Radar is dead, because that big CLUNK was the sound of the radar breaking the power line after it blew through the nose.  Now radar has 400 knots of wind blowing on it and it's broken. This is getting expensive. OK, can't make it to Pensacola, where is nearest military field...USN/USAF base near ATL. We tell Center we're declaring an emergency, headed to military field. Landing gear indicator shows nose gear not down, well fuck, this is really going to be expensive. Overhead the field another aircraft that was airborne comes up and checks our landing gear out. The guy tells us, in the best Jeff Spicoli voice, 'Dude, you're pretty fucked up'. Nice, is that your professional opinion? But, God loves fools and drunks...landing gear was down. We land, limp our crippled jet to Base Operations. As we're getting out, a Navy Captain in dress uniform walks up to us and says, 'Boys, come with me'. We know we are just fucked.  He escorts us to the back of the jet, away from the crowd, looks us right in the eye and says, 'The most important thing for you to do is get your story straight.' Win! 'Sir, we've been working on that for 20 minutes', says Chub. 'Good'. He turns and leaves.Â
After any accident you have to give blood and piss, no problem. Chub, big tough Irish guy, is deathly afraid of needles and PASSES OUT!
More good karma, my best man from my wedding lives in Atlanta and he picks us up and houses us for the night.
We need to start drinking, before reality sets in. We go to a bar called 'Beer Mug', Chub hooks with some chick. He claims he took her out to the parking lot and did her doggy style over the hood of my friend's car, a Ford. We start calling her 'droF' when she finally came back in, because ford backwards is what is probably pressed into her stomach.
Remember that 200' thing? Well we were at 100', if not lower, but the actual altitude of the power line we hit (in a climb) was 205'. The fact we were in a climb never came out of the investigation. I would survive to fuck up again.
God loves fools and drunks.
Damn. I think I would have to clean out my drawers after that!
That's insane. You're a damn ghost.
Better than "Shades of Grey"....... QLF
Em, find 'the guy's guide to 50 shades of grey' book online, about 50 pages...hilarious!
So...you posted your confession to a very public board? What was that thing about Fools you was talking bout?
Pretty kewl story tho. Fag.
Wow now that's an adventure.
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QLF, E14D w/JamesGordon
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QLF, E14D w/JamesGordon
Don't forget your new buddy, BigNastyDoucheBagFuk.
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QLF, E14D w/JamesGordon
Don't forget your new buddy, BigNastyDoucheBagFuk.
He's just misunderstood, Doc. We mere mortals shouldn't be expected to grasp his awesomeness. What a fucking tool!
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QLF, E14D w/JamesGordon
Don't forget your new buddy, BigNastyDoucheBagFuk.
He's just misunderstood, Doc. We mere mortals shouldn't be expected to grasp his awesomeness. What a fucking tool!
They are all just misunderstood and deserve a trophy and juice box for trying...
Don't let it affect your quit, keep building accountability.
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QLF, E14D w/JamesGordon
Don't forget your new buddy, BigNastyDoucheBagFuk.
He's just misunderstood, Doc. We mere mortals shouldn't be expected to grasp his awesomeness. What a fucking tool!
They are all just misunderstood and deserve a trophy and juice box for trying...
Don't let it affect your quit, keep building accountability.
Yum.... Juice boxes!
Have you considered that he might be a leap year quitter? Lol.
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Slug, I quit all damn day with ya bro
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QLF, E14D w/JamesGordon
Don't forget your new buddy, BigNastyDoucheBagFuk.
He's just misunderstood, Doc. We mere mortals shouldn't be expected to grasp his awesomeness. What a fucking tool!
They are all just misunderstood and deserve a trophy and juice box for trying...
Don't let it affect your quit, keep building accountability.
Yum.... Juice boxes!
Have you considered that he might be a leap year quitter? Lol.
Well look here seems like I'm a God damn star in this thread too. You mother fuckers are gonna make me a legend huh. Well carry on.... you sons a bitches get ready for my HOF speach. It is going to be epic....
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Sitting here trying to kill time and an eventful weekend comes to mind.
Supposed to fly from VA to Pensacola for a weekend airshow. Gorgeous early Summer Friday, we fly a low level route. Get on first point of the route somewhere in Southern NC. Allowed to fly as low as 200', speed can't be supersonic. Fuel isn't too much of an issue, we're only going to be low for 20-30 minutes, then climb up with the airliners for last 2-300 miles. We're boogying along, about 100' (remember when I just said 'as low as 200', that might come to bite your humble scribe), 450 knots or so and it's time to climb up to Mogul's airliner altitude and soar with our new quitter, Airbus Pilot. The instant we begin to climb, a thin black streak shows up right in front of me, the fiberglass nose explodes and I hear and feel a big 'Clunk'. Engine instruments are normal but something isn't quite right and Old Slug.go is puzzled. Other guy, Chub, says something about 'We need to get out of here.' Well, I'm thinking he thinks we need to eject. Fuck, no, you are not! I tell him 'No, stay with the jet.' You never say 'Don't eject', because if the other guy doesn't hear 'Don't', yer fooked. He says, 'I mean we need to get higher, now!' Well, during this exchange we had probably gained 5,000 feet with a 6 G pull so the point was moot. All right, now, what the fuck just happened? We figured we had hit a power line or something, like one of those really big ones you see that are 200' in the air. Radar is dead, because that big CLUNK was the sound of the radar breaking the power line after it blew through the nose.  Now radar has 400 knots of wind blowing on it and it's broken. This is getting expensive. OK, can't make it to Pensacola, where is nearest military field...USN/USAF base near ATL. We tell Center we're declaring an emergency, headed to military field. Landing gear indicator shows nose gear not down, well fuck, this is really going to be expensive. Overhead the field another aircraft that was airborne comes up and checks our landing gear out. The guy tells us, in the best Jeff Spicoli voice, 'Dude, you're pretty fucked up'. Nice, is that your professional opinion? But, God loves fools and drunks...landing gear was down. We land, limp our crippled jet to Base Operations. As we're getting out, a Navy Captain in dress uniform walks up to us and says, 'Boys, come with me'. We know we are just fucked.  He escorts us to the back of the jet, away from the crowd, looks us right in the eye and says, 'The most important thing for you to do is get your story straight.' Win! 'Sir, we've been working on that for 20 minutes', says Chub. 'Good'. He turns and leaves.Â
After any accident you have to give blood and piss, no problem. Chub, big tough Irish guy, is deathly afraid of needles and PASSES OUT!
More good karma, my best man from my wedding lives in Atlanta and he picks us up and houses us for the night.
We need to start drinking, before reality sets in. We go to a bar called 'Beer Mug', Chub hooks with some chick. He claims he took her out to the parking lot and did her doggy style over the hood of my friend's car, a Ford. We start calling her 'droF' when she finally came back in, because ford backwards is what is probably pressed into her stomach.
Remember that 200' thing? Well we were at 100', if not lower, but the actual altitude of the power line we hit (in a climb) was 205'. The fact we were in a climb never came out of the investigation. I would survive to fuck up again.
God loves fools and drunks.
Damn. I think I would have to clean out my drawers after that!
That's insane. You're a damn ghost.
Better than "Shades of Grey"....... QLF
Em, find 'the guy's guide to 50 shades of grey' book online, about 50 pages...hilarious!
So...you posted your confession to a very public board? What was that thing about Fools you was talking bout?
Pretty kewl story tho. Fag.
Just saw this....thanks for another awesome story!! Always nice when things work out!!
-
There once was a man from VA Beach, who had a story so funny you could yuk it.
Pretty girls working out got crop dusted while on the treadmill, with no intention he did offend from
girls to commanders that got spat on.
-
Allow me to introduce myself. I'm 53, been dipping since college, yes, I'm that dumb.
I used to go through 2 cans/week, but I WAS a constant dipper, just small ones.
Made it through my first day, chewing lots of gum and Smokey Mountain.
Spent a lot of time lurking on KTC and it sure looks like the best online support group there could possibly be.
Looking forward to doubling my day count tomorrow!!!
QLF!
Allow me to introduce myself. I'm 71 years old and have been dipping since I quit smoking about 35 years ago. I am 4 days free of Skoal as of this writing. If I haven't already planted the seeds of failed health, I would be surprised. I'm trying to overcome arrogance and at least repeat an 80-day quit I had last year.
I know that I need this site and promise to spend a little time every day here, at least posting roll.
ftdavis46 (California)
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Allow me to introduce myself. I'm 53, been dipping since college, yes, I'm that dumb.
I used to go through 2 cans/week, but I WAS a constant dipper, just small ones.
Made it through my first day, chewing lots of gum and Smokey Mountain.
Spent a lot of time lurking on KTC and it sure looks like the best online support group there could possibly be.
Looking forward to doubling my day count tomorrow!!!
QLF!
Allow me to introduce myself. I'm 71 years old and have been dipping since I quit smoking about 35 years ago. I am 4 days free of Skoal as of this writing. If I haven't already planted the seeds of failed health, I would be surprised. I'm trying to overcome arrogance and at least repeat an 80-day quit I had last year.
I know that I need this site and promise to spend a little time every day here, at least posting roll.
ftdavis46 (California)
Ftdavis
If you are for real, you need to start your own intro page. This is slug.go's intro and he takes quitting a little more seriously than 0.2 posts per day. You should have AT LEAST 1.0 posts per day if you knew how thing work here. You need to read a lot to learn how serious we are here.
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
-
The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
Nice work!!! - enjoy and savor the moment and then set your sights on a new goal!
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
Nice work!!! - enjoy and savor the moment and then set your sights on a new goal!
Congratulations you bad ass! The freedom keeps getting better from here, one day at a time!
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
Nice work!!! - enjoy and savor the moment and then set your sights on a new goal!
Congratulations you bad ass! The freedom keeps getting better from here, one day at a time!
Well done, Slug. Congrats and keep it going.
-
The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
Nice work!!! - enjoy and savor the moment and then set your sights on a new goal!
Congratulations you bad ass! The freedom keeps getting better from here, one day at a time!
Well done, Slug. Congrats and keep it going.
Congrats Slug. Can't wait for this HOF speech! Can it possibly top the treadmill or treetop flyin stories?
-
The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
Nice work!!! - enjoy and savor the moment and then set your sights on a new goal!
Congratulations you bad ass! The freedom keeps getting better from here, one day at a time!
Well done, Slug. Congrats and keep it going.
Congrats Slug. Can't wait for this HOF speech! Can it possibly top the treadmill or treetop flyin stories?
Congrats! Keep it going the quit gets even better!
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
Nice work!!! - enjoy and savor the moment and then set your sights on a new goal!
Congratulations you bad ass! The freedom keeps getting better from here, one day at a time!
Well done, Slug. Congrats and keep it going.
Congrats Slug. Can't wait for this HOF speech! Can it possibly top the treadmill or treetop flyin stories?
Congrats! Keep it going the quit gets even better!
Way to be slug.go! Keep it up. You are a formidable and flatulent quitter!
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
Nice work!!! - enjoy and savor the moment and then set your sights on a new goal!
Congratulations you bad ass! The freedom keeps getting better from here, one day at a time!
Well done, Slug. Congrats and keep it going.
Congrats Slug. Can't wait for this HOF speech! Can it possibly top the treadmill or treetop flyin stories?
Congrats! Keep it going the quit gets even better!
Way to be slug.go! Keep it up. You are a formidable and flatulent quitter!
Congrats Slug.go 'oh yeah'
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Nicely done Sluggo...keep stack in them up.
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Nicely done Sluggo...keep stack in them up.
I love this quit. Nice work friend!
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Nicely done Sluggo...keep stack in them up.
I love this quit. Nice work friend!
Congrats on the big milestone Slug. I know you're a humble quitter, but you deserve a celebration. Quit with you every day.
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Nicely done Sluggo...keep stack in them up.
I love this quit. Nice work friend!
Congrats on the big milestone Slug. I know you're a humble quitter, but you deserve a celebration. Quit with you every day.
Appreciate all the kind words, back to quitting.
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Nicely done Sluggo...keep stack in them up.
I love this quit. Nice work friend!
Congrats on the big milestone Slug. I know you're a humble quitter, but you deserve a celebration. Quit with you every day.
Appreciate all the kind words, back to quitting.
Congrats Slug.go. It's gotta feel great to make 100 days!
mb289
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
HOF +1 -Slugo.go you are a bad ass quitter, this is true. I am proud to quit with you today. Hope you partied long and hard yesterday... Congrats....Robbie
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
HOF +1 -Slugo.go you are a bad ass quitter, this is true. I am proud to quit with you today. Hope you partied long and hard yesterday... Congrats....Robbie
Good work Slugo. Awesome milestone.
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
HOF +1 -Slugo.go you are a bad ass quitter, this is true. I am proud to quit with you today. Hope you partied long and hard yesterday... Congrats....Robbie
Good work Slugo. Awesome milestone.
Good work my friend!!! Proud to quit with you!!
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
HOF +1 -Slugo.go you are a bad ass quitter, this is true. I am proud to quit with you today. Hope you partied long and hard yesterday... Congrats....Robbie
Good work Slugo. Awesome milestone.
Good work my friend!!! Proud to quit with you!!
Congrats! Never a doubt!
Lead on brutha!
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
HOF +1 -Slugo.go you are a bad ass quitter, this is true. I am proud to quit with you today. Hope you partied long and hard yesterday... Congrats....Robbie
Good work Slugo. Awesome milestone.
Good work my friend!!! Proud to quit with you!!
Congrats! Never a doubt!
Lead on brutha!
Congrats on the HOF!
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The HOF just became that much more badass and entertaining... Congrats Slug!! Enjoy your day, and see you on roll tomorrow morning for another +1.
Congrats Sluggo!!!!
Pure badassery!! Well done Sluggo!
Keep adding them up Sluggo. This is a great day to relax and make some further commitment to quit. I'm quit with ya.
Way to go Slugo. Your a pretty cool dude and a great quitter.
Congrats slug go! Well done. Keep it rolling today!
Stellar quit by a stellar quitter. Big day today.
HOF +1 -Slugo.go you are a bad ass quitter, this is true. I am proud to quit with you today. Hope you partied long and hard yesterday... Congrats....Robbie
Good work Slugo. Awesome milestone.
Good work my friend!!! Proud to quit with you!!
Congrats! Never a doubt!
Lead on brutha!
Congrats on the HOF!
Bravo, Slug!!! 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah' 'oh yeah'
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James Gordon - Day 64 Feels like the first 2 weeks but I will make it!
James, you posted day 50 on 3/26 (your first day on roll), then come back two weeks later and post day 64? Not how this works. Either post roll EVERY DAMN DAY or be gone. If damn near every one else in May can come in here on a daily basis, you sure as hell can, too. Whoever is keeping the Spreadsheet this week, I recommend leaving Mr. Gordon on page 3 until he posts 5 straight days.
Get with us, James, we're pulling for you!
bump
back up there
Who the hell is James Gordon? Is this a May member? I'm confused.
JamesGordon is a showman. He is mysterious. He shows up when he wants to.
Gordo- if you really want to blow peoples minds, this time don't just take 2 weeks off, take about 5 weeks off. Then just show up on day 100! James FUCKING Gordon! Hall of Fame on three fucking posts! It will be incredible.
You can be like the Haley's Comet of Project Mayhem. Every 5 weeks you blow through the roll call, changing peoples lives, the life of the party. It will be fucking awesome.
Seriously bro- you need to post roll. Right now you are just stopped, and as soon as you have a lame excuse, you will hit the chongo again.
No one even knew you were a part of the group. I am all about self-accountability, but are you really even a member here?
Maybe he's actually Matt Damon. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnPWJOJYVKc)
back on top, Claude Rains!
need to keep this on top until we hear from our international man of mystery
Bumperooney
With a dude like el Gordo, we might have to keep this ball in the air for weeks until he finally sees it. But when he does, I am sure he will inspire and amaze us with his answers.
Maybe he's a time traveler!?! :ph43r: 'qt' 'winker'
This is liquid gold -- by the time Who-the-fuck-is-James-Gordon reads this, he'll have his own FB fan page (sorry Lipi), probably a theme song, and very likely be Dos Equis' Most Interesting Man in the World.
"I don't always post roll, but when I do, I prefer to do it JamesGordon style."
I think we just found a new motto -- and mascot -- for this page.
Here's to everyone on this page / site that gets it. Quit with all of you.
Flux capacitor maybe??? Delorian?
Needed to Post- Mayhem Style-- but putting this future cautionary tale on 'How not to Quit' back on Top
He's John Galt! (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Galt)
I'm actually named after Ayn Rand... My pops is an interesting dude _
Hey guys, sorry I haven't posted in a while. Life has gotten a little weird lately. I don't have a computer, or a phone......... Oh shit, wrong group. Sorry May!!!!
Don't take the lame asses. Protect your quits!!!! Post roll every damn day!!!!
He's actually in May 2124. No biggie. Just goes to show you shouldn't tinker with wormholes in the early/late stages of your quit.
bumpsky to the top
This is literally going to have to stay here for a month before he sees it. My apologies for continuing the massive quote vortex.
I was feeling a little low this morning, due to no appearances from JamesGordon. I clicked on his name, seeking inspiration.
Unfortunately, it looks as if he has been back to site since he was "discovered" by Project Mayhem. He undoubtedly saw the almost cult-like following he has acquired, but didn't comment on it, and didn't post roll.
Part of me is hoping he is going to follow my plan, and will come back in a blaze of glory on day 100. I think its more likely that he wasn't ready for the responsibilities and increased scrutiny that come with being a celebrity.
Gordo- vaya con dios, we hardly knew you.
He's almost a folk hero at this point. Shrouded in mystery and hailing from a different time. A time where quits were won with minimal involvement. Let's hope this doesn't end up being yet another cautionary tale.
To quote Sir Winston Churchill on James Gordon, 'I cannot forecast the actions of JamesGordon. He is a riddle, wrapped up in a mystery, inside an enigma.'
I was going to post support roll today but instead...how small can we get Slug's first post...
my god this shit is getting ridiculous
QLF, E14D w/JamesGordon
It's no fun until the first post is a single column of letters......
Bump to shrink the slug
That sounds dirty
2 cents
I'm quit like James Gordon
13eezee - qlf with jamesgordon!
Bumpfix
I can't begin to express how thrilled I am that Mayhem and its loyal supporters have rallied together behind the bold path charted by Jimmy Gordo, aka Fat Jimmy. His time is of such value that for our meager little page (and site) to even get two appearances by his Epic-ness is something we should embrace. Only a chosen few get the sacred invitation to join his elite band of posters. Maybe they're lingering, maybe they're not. Small minded folk such as ourselves will never know. They are the chosen ones. The Ghost Posters. The Ghosters?
- Krusty (sorry for the bump)
Do not let this vortex die!! JamesGordon, only your return will end this madness.
When this is all said and done, JamesGordon and May 14 shall be legendary within KTC. Drink it in brethren.
Though the quit is hard and the craves tough, I shall not despair for I hear the return of James Gordon on the horizon, yea, even knocking on the outer door as we speak. I will continue to wait for James Gordon.
Sending James Gordon into the abyss
I'm not sure if that last post means that we are supposed to stop talking about El Gordo, but this vortex made me spit fake chew on my computer and laugh several times.
"Fat Jimmy" is the greatest nickname that Gordon ever had.
I think Fat Jimmy is the most fun I have had on this site. The dude will be mentioned prominently in my HOF speech. Thanks for noticing him Slug.go. To think his subtle presence might have gone unnoticed without your vigilance.
I think people like this are toxic to our cause. So, if the outer door is properly tyled then no one shall enter except for those who are worthy of our cause. Which is to stay quit.
Like the Toxic Avenger, just not as cool or mutated. Actually that means he's nothing like Toxie. RIP
Let us not give up the cause, Mayhem, but keep fighting the good fight! Slug.go's OP is down to two words per line, let us push it to singles!
Sorry I've missed this guys been catching up on sleep and emails. Many pissed of people I'm dealing with, but this epicness has helped relieve some stress. Thank you James Gordon
We all owe Fat Jimmy so much, he has helped us all by showing us how a true quitter should act.
Fat Jimmy is like the Incredible Hulk/Mormon we all knew when we were children.
If you scroll up and down real quick on the post string it is kind of psychedelic. Reminds me of climbing Mt. Fuji with Zillah cowboy in my younger days. Going for one word per line for Slug!!!!
I love, love, love, that this quote vortex was the first thing I saw after the two days of downtime.
Maybe he's Flash Gordon, here and gone in a flash!
Back to the top.
QLJG, E14D!
Everyone needs to breathe a deep sigh of relief, despite the heart palpitations caused by Bizarro World May Roll Call. I checked once, twice, fee-tines-a-mady (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOLH9QF-NnI (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOLH9QF-NnI)) and -- I'm not kidding, gents -- Fat Jimmy has not made an appearance since the new world order came into existence. By my rough math, he's on day 70 today (Tues the 15th). If we're men of our word, this quote vortex has at least 30 more days and potentially one more platform transfer before Fat Jimmy graces us with his third post as he saunters into the HOF. Fat Jimmy: like a boss.
...and the legend continues.
We mustn't give this up lest Fat Jimmy think we've stopped caring!
QLJG E14D
It brings a tear to my eye knowing how proud Fat Jimmy would be if he could see all the inspiration he has caused...
Have you ever been so far even as decided to use go want to look more like?
RickD... are you ok? Did you have a stroke when you wrote that comment?
I love the fact that most of slug's original post is now down to single words...
Yesterday would have been perfect. May 14 had 3 days of 100% posting followed by a week of double digit debauchery. Fat Jimminy G is crying in his cheerios.
My biggest fear is that Fat Jimmy posts roll, but this vortex is buried somewhere and he doesn't see it.
It's like a signal fire, we need to keep it burning at all times.
The new format may confuse him if he ever did come back.....but, back to the top any way :-)
I'm pretty sure that slug's OP is literally going to disappear haha. Fat Jimmy, one way or another we will make sure you see this.
Reading back through every single post in this vortex takes about 10 minutes.... well, at least once you're done hallucinating and your eyes stop bleeding, it does.
Hi guys, my name is James Gordon. I’m just an ordinary guy with some extraordinary gifts. I found KTC when I was Googling a place to get some decent fried chicken. Apparently I fat-fingered and missed the “F” in the middle. It’s too stinking close to the “T”. Anyhow, I was emotionally compelled by some of the stories of anguish, distress, and poor roll posting (or something like that)I found in the Mayhem Group. It resonated deeply within my soul. Even though I don’t dip, I wanted so badly to connect. Now I think I have found a home.
Like most of you, it has been a long, cold Winter here in Minneapolis. I guess it hasnÂ’t been that long, really, itÂ’s just that IÂ’ve never had the chance to play World of Warcraft in my parentsÂ’ basement between sessions of surfing barely-legal (maybe?) porn sites for eight months straight. By the way, if any of you know a schoolgirl that likes lollipops and ball gags, PM me. But thatÂ’s the only reason you should PM me.
I was born in 1974 to a middle-class family on the upper East side of the city. Dad works a respectable job at an automotive plant, mom is a den-mother for the girl scouts and bakes a lot. I like when she bakes and I get to see her all covered in flour, you know what I mean? Love you, mom!
Anyway, back to the whole “my extraordinary gifts” thing: I actually hold a couple of fancy degrees. First, I earned a B.S. in Math from Fraud University when I was just 17. I’m a proud FU alumni. There were some tough courses in that program, such as counting days. I figured out quickly that I wasn’t going to be an accountant. I also took one called “The Joke’s on you”, but I didn’t do so hot. So I changed majors again, switching to Physics. I actually figured out the secret to unlocking the whole space-time continuum thing. It’s cool because I can jack off while playing Call of Duty without having to pause the game. It also helps me pick out a brotherhood of “quitters” (you guys shouldn’t refer to yourselves in such a demeaning way) wherein I can post once every two weeks or so, while virtually fast-forwarding my quit just past the halfway point the HOF. I haven’t figured out what that acronym means exactly, but I’m pretty sure it stands for “Hegelonfinkelschneit”, which is German for “A secret brotherhood where we eventually get to build our own Angry Birds app using pictures of our naked, fat, pale selfies”. In any case, I’m in. I also majored in German, if you couldn’t tell.
So anyway, my parents have been on me since I was 22 to get my own place. I’m just not into it. I’m 40 and doing just fine on this couch. In fact, this couch has my morbidly obese frame perfectly imprinted on it with the corresponding outline of body grease. Or maybe it’s the baby lotion. Ah, it all runs together anyway. So when some of you guys say you’ve “fought the beast” for 18 years, I feel you on that. The beast to me is the overbearing father in my life that told me to get a job.
Another thing I’m pretty awesome at is dependability. That’s something I’ve long considered an attribute. Mom even let me guest-speak at the girl scout troop meeting once. Greatest day of my life (wink, wink). But I made them come downstairs. Mom was so annoying that day. She had like 80 yankee candles going. Not sure what that was about. So when people ask me if I’m the real thing, I’m just like, “Sure, I’m James Gordon”. And usually they don’t say much after that. But I know they know.
IÂ’m also good at following instructions and paying attention to detail. One of the dudes on your site, some Slug.go (OMG I hope thatÂ’s not his real name LOL) guy, told me something about roll. I shut my browser window real fast, which IÂ’m used to doing because mom spanks me when she catches me flogging the dolphin to lesbian scenes. Anyway, I went upstairs and asked mom to make me some rolls. We had the greatest flour fight ever. She doesnÂ’t know it, but I filed that memory in the spank tank for laterÂ…
So about the space-time continuum thing: It’s pretty cool that I’ve been a “quitter” (again, you guys shouldn’t be so hard on yourselves) for a couple of days. I’m putting this in my Intro because I’m not sure if some of the Veterans are keen enough to realize that my days are actually entire weeks for some of them. But I feel like maybe my time-warp skills are fading, because it feels like hours now between slap-the-ham sessions for me.
Some of you guys are talking about wives and kids and “quitting” for them. I’m not one to judge, but that may be a poor example for your offspring. I had a date once. Unfortunately, the cold Minnesota Winter locked up the internet connection and my Oovoo account froze up just like Lake Superior. Anyway, I’m not sure she was really a girl, but it doesn’t matter.
Whoever named me fat Jimmie sure hit the nail on the head. You guys are so smart (except that whole “quitting dip” thing). I personally won’t give up dip. You guys are missing out, IMHO. If you’ve never had a Ruffles potato chip delicately lathered in Ranch, you’re letting the best in life pass you by.
Anyway, I saw something about intros and decided I’d chime in. You guys may not hear from me until we cross the bridge into “Hegelonfinkelschneit” together, but that’s okay. It’s only one day in the life of James Gordon.
As for your website, I browsed it for a few minutes and figured out what KTC stands for. Kill the Can. I totally get it. Sometimes after a chicken and potato chip binge, I absolutely can do some of that action. Have any of you guys ever “roughed up the suspect” while sitting on the potty? You should try it!
So basically, thatÂ’s me. IÂ’m kind of like a fat Chuck Norris ninja-type with the ability to fast-forward time and not miss anything at all. And I was serious about that lollipop and ball-gag thing.
I can’t wait to Hegelonfinkelschneit with all of you. Especially Paul S. For being a serious “quitter” with such a sunny disposition, he seems like a decent enough guy for being from Kentucky. I’m pretty sure he’s probably like 6’3” and athletically built with a respectable job and a monster truck, but I’d kind of like him to hurl a nude Angry Bird Selfie at me.
Gotta run guys, momÂ’s making hot cross buns. They make a huge mess, and she gets on me for stomping when I want something because she says it messes up the dough. But it will get all over her, and she might even let me lick the spoon.
*Disclaimer: this is not intended to offend fried chicken fans, gamers, girl scouts, or residents of the Greater Twin Cities Metropolitan area.
Ladies and Gentleman- James Fucking Gordon.
Paul S, I'm a little pissed about this, because after Slug.go's suggestion of someone ghosting an intro for Fat Jim, I was envisioning a contest of sorts, with several people taking a shot at the Bio. I just don't see a lot of people being able to create this type of Gordon universe. This is why they usually put all of the good people at the end of the talent show.
2 words....fucking epic
First things first...that "intro" is hands down the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen on this website, it isn't even a competition. Second, if we can get that "intro" down to single words, we truly are immortal gods.
Funniest fucking Intro ever. I tip my hat to the author. Can't wait for the movie to come out.
Back to the top, some may have missed this. Wonder if we can get this to be a page long? Could take years...
I'm curious to see how many years it will take. Challenge accepted.
For all of you Gordo watchers. His two weeks appearance is due today. Keep your eyes peeled for him, and keep this string at the top (bottom). QLF E14D
I put the over under at 6.5 days for El Gordo to show up again? Whatcha got? I'm going to be optimistic and say UNDER
Now it's time to continue the challenge and see how long it takes for this fucker to be a full page. VORTEX CONTINUE!!
Since Gordo is in the room, wanted to make sure he saw how his legend began
Few ppl will ever have the ability to capture so much attention....back to the front if the room!
JG meta 1
Wow.. I guess I'm the talk of the quit group.. Sorry I haven't posted everyday.
I thought this was a support group not a place to bash the people that are going through the same issues that you are.
Maybe this site is not for me.. I didn't realize that you had to post everyday. Sorry I can't.
I have been busy and trying my best to forget about this crazy habit that I have had for WAY 2 long.
78 days.
'Popcorn'
A support group by it's very nature requires your presence in order to be supported.
Posting roll daily is pretty much the only bloody rule we have.
I don't really know where to go with that, except to say that if you think the way to get to where your going is by showing up once every two weeks then no this site is probably not for you. Good luck.
And then...poof....he's gone.
I am screaming with fucking laughter.
DWD and Sapp are right, there is now way that was really James Gordon.
That was even funnier than Paul S's intro thread.
He ends it with "78 Days". I am fucking pissing myself whether that was a mod playing a joke or whether it was really him. Either way, it is the highlight of my day!!!!!!!!!
Who knew that James Gordon had "622" after his name?
This whole time I thought he was just JamesGordon.
Was that really him? How will we know?
Hey Gordon- if that was really you, please go back and read the whole thread. You have to start two weeks ago.
I will keep bumping this message to the bottom of the list so that you can see it when you log back in in two weeks, so that you see my suggestion, but by then the OP will be 4 weeks old. You have a lot of reading ahead of you, and not a lot of time apparently.
In reality, I think it is just too big a coincidence that some of the vets just today started bitching about us talking too much about El Gordo, and also the day that the scriptures predicted his next return. Its just too neat.
JG meta 2
If it is a joke, it has had me fooled for a Gordon and a half.
I am now proceeding with the assumption that it was really a post by James Gordon, and not a joke.
If that is the case, it is a fascinating post.
How much of the James Gordon threads did he read before he posted that?
Did he do all the way back?
How did he not know you are supposed to post roll every day?
If he didn't know you were supposed to post roll, why does he post roll at all?
Did he really intend to come back every two weeks...er... I... mean every full Gordon?
What if we never started the Gordon threads, would he have just posted to the hall of fame?
Would we have let him?
Why does he pick Wednesdays? Is hump day usually his toughest day?
I could go on forever. And none of these questions will ever be answered.
Fat Jimmy is blowing my mind, again.
Thank you James Gordon.
I look forward to day 92 a full Gordon from now.
Man i don't give a damn what anybody says, newby, maybe, veteran, that is some funny shit right there.
Totally agree. My ghost bio pales in comparison to this hilarity. Prophetic.
Who knew that in the span of two international standard Gordon's this class would unite in solidarity behind the stalwart leadership of James mother fucking Gordon.
I'm proud to be quit on this Gordon and for every Gordon henceforward and hitherto.
No kidding bro, I was thinking the same thing. James Gordon united this class like nothing else had before. The official whipping boy of May 14, and we thank you.
James Gordon...May2014's Haley's comet. You can set your fucking watch to him.
JamesGordon622...6x2+2=14. QLF E14D. Holy shit, this is how crop circles are laid out, and Stonehenge. Time traveler (fix from slug.go)
Four Gordons and seven years ago...Gordo influenced Lincoln's Gettysburg address
Classic, now we are 'bump fixing' Gordon posts
They are all too precious. Can't afford to miss one.
Crop circles!!!! Just awesome!!!!
How does the spreadsheet get formatted to the Gordon scale?
I can do an extra column that converts your quit days into international standard Gordon's. I'll do it tonight.
Now THAT'S brotherhood!!!
Sapper, you've got too much time on your hands. I agree with you that it is a hoax. Read his last roll post before this. Day 64-feels like the first two weeks...I call hilarious bullshit.
Not really, and it doesn't take long anyway, but regardless, this is so epic, I'll make time to create a new unit of time measurement. My goal is to see it in widespread use in the future. Somebody needs to start a Wikipedia page about James Gordon and Gordon's as a unit of measurement.
So...7.14 Gordons gets one in the HOF?
Yes sir, your math is solid.
Actually, the true value of Gordons to HOF has 14 decimal places. Here I've calculated the exact value of the number of Gordon's to HOF. We'll refer to this value as HOG's (Hall of Gordon's).
7.14285714285714
I was really hoping for an indeterminate number, like Pi, but oh well.
JG meta 3
I really don't know what the fuck is the problem with alot of you..
Here I am trying by best to quit this fucking deadly habit that I have and trying to make it through just one day without thinking about quitting.
But I'm getting major shit about not being able to post every day.
Sorry that I don't have to time to sit and chat all day long on this site. I'm lucky to get on the computer once a week just to check my own email.
So NO I will not be able to post every day.
I'm glad most of you are getting a kick out of it.
To all the folks that have said positive things and have sent positive IM's I thank you.
This site has helped me a ton besides all the inmature posting that SOME of you have posted.
James- I found your post. Let me address your points one at a time.
1. We're addicts, that is one problem we all have in common.
2. You don't get the way quitting here works. The rest of us are not trying to make it through the day without thinking about quitting. That is not an effective strategy to quit. If there were kids setting your house on fire with a book of matches, would you close your eyes and plug your ears, and hope they would be gone when you opened them?
3. You don't have to chat, you just have to post roll. When you practice, I bet you can get it done in less than a minute. You don't have one fucking minute? What is your profession? You can only get on a computer once a week? Are you stuck in the gimp box the rest of the week?
4. If you can't post every day, you can reach out to someone via text to post for you. If you don't want to that, you can FUCK off.
5. You sound sarcastic, but yes, most of us are getting a kick out of it, thanks.
6. I'm happy that people said positive things to you in a PM, did you reply? Or were you out of time?
7. How has it helped you a ton? You obviously didn't read much on the site. You are not posting roll regularly. Do you have a secret core group of supporters that just remained silent the last few weeks?
If you think the site is helping you now, imagine how much it would help you if you were participating, instead of being (as far as I know) the most legendarily half-assed member in the history of the history of the site.
If you stop your whining, and think about how things are supposed to work around here, and then how you do them, maybe you will get your shit together. If you don't, why should we give a shit?
To the bottom. Lipi speaks the truth James.
Effing Lipi.... Love that shit!! 'Popcorn'
'Popcorn' is exactly right!!
JG meta 4
If anyone wants to compile the insane list of conspiracy theories, be my guest. I can only go so far down the rabbit hole before it start staring back at me...
Bump just because this monster is fucking hilarious.
The Gordon622 threads should have their own pinned topic on the site, and a dedicated moderator tasked with adding new content and tracking the appearances of JG.Does anyone have an explaination from Fat Jimmy yet as to why he only gets 2 minutes per week on the computer, or are we still going with "stuck in Gimp Box"?
My HOG date is 6/13/14. No longer interested in HOF.
I thought for a second I was having a stroke when I saw this.....
Gordon's Constant 7.14285714285714 'roflmao'
I just have to say, this has been an epic discussion...
I hope this epicness never dies.
Has he made an appearance lately. I mean has 1 IGU been completed yet? I'm jonesing.
edit: Paul S still has the best addition to this clusterfuck. Dat intro...
So he posted a full Gordon on day 78, next Gordo will be day 92. Biq question: does he break with Gordo cycle posting and post day 100...or wait until day 106? Vegas odds are 4:1 he posts day 100, then is never heard from again. Greatest trick the Gordo ever performed was making people think he didn't exist. Stay Gordo my friends.
I cannot wait to write his HOG speech...Epic, part deux. Stay Gordon indeed. I have a rough draft ready.
But to Lippi's point on the intro, a contest is probably in order. I'll write mine on HOG+1 non-ISG day. But here's a snippet:
"I'd like to thank mom and all my May brethren. Mostly mom, though. Mom, you have no idea how much help you've been. Thanks for always being there for me and resetting the wireless router everytime I stomp my feet and yell upstairs. For you May guys, thanks for being there every Gordon or so, and for using all those emoticons LOL. You guys really do crack me up. IMHO You should make one wearing an apron and flour-covered. Also, to my mom, thanks for washing those socks, even though you know they don't go on my feet. And thanks for using triple coupons on Brawny paper towels. I get backed up sometimes during marathon gaming sessions, and I hate when I take it out by Gordo-varnishing Grandma's old coffee table.
For all you guys that PM'ed me, I sort of appreciate it, but was expecting more of a schoolgirl/ball-gag hookup. Unless the goth thing was a joke, in which case I could make that work I guess. Same skirt, anyway. I know you guys advised me to post or to text you. I appreciate that. I'll definitely PM you back when I get to HOFx8 here in a few ISGs. The 622 isn't one to fly solo, as you all know by now.
To Ridiculous (sp?) I'm not sure what meta JG 1 means, but I think it's like that basketball player Meta World Peace, though I think he uses two "t's". You might have meant that and just spelled it wrong. It happens, man. Keep your chin up. I'll keep my chins up too. I've got like 5 LOL. Metta World Peace is a wierd name, but sounds bad-you-know-what (mom will yell at me if I type a$$). I think you all know what word I'm talking about."
Is there even a point in having the contest? Paul S, you are the ghost writer of Mayhem...just wouldn't seem right any other way...
622 bitches
Fuck the contest. Paul already won the contest. He truly understands the ways of Gordon.
Anyone remember this guy?
It's been so long.....where the fuck is JamesGordon????
It's only been like 2/3 of a Gordon. (rough math, obviously...Gordon's cannot be measured in fractions)
'Finger' 'Remshot' '40'
Fuck it, I'll take part in helping revive this beast.
He looks to have logged on Saturday, but no post.
He must be building anticipation. Or he caved during his 7th Gordon. I have heard that the 7th Gordon is especially tough on dudes attempting their fifth roll post.
Gordo's on day 97 today...Thursday will be watershed event of a magnitude never witnessed by mere mortals.
An Associated Press dispatch just announced that there will be a full vote of Congress on Thursday, May 15, 2014 to vote on a legislative act proclaiming that day a new national holiday. In one of the only instances of unified bipartisan support since the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, both houses of Congress are expected to bypass floor debate and go straight to a vote, with no opposition expected. Although the specific wording has yet to be finalized, May 15th is expected to be forever known as either "Fat Jimmy Day" or "The Day that JamesGordon Roared". Proposed Spanish translations are varied, but Hispanic communities are coalescing around "El dia del hombre con huevos de oro" which, loosely translated, means "The Day of the Man with Golden Balls". The White House is enthusiastically supporting the new proposed federal holiday, but would like to see Congress go further, suggesting that it would welcome the idea of all Thursdays hereafter referred to as Gordays.
That's.hilarious Krusty! I'm on pins and needles waiting for Thursday!
Holy hell... I gotta get in this... This is hilarious.. I just busted up laughing during a "boring" meeting at this shit... Boss is probably pissed, but I don't have to see him until the Gorday after next.
El dia del hombre con huevos de oro --- F'ing genious! That is my new battle cry in quit!
I can't wait to see Fat Jimmy's HOG speech courtesy of Paul S. I've been looking forward to it for Gordon's on end.
I've been tracking Fat Jimmy, and he was on-line again this morning, still no post.
What is happening Fat Jimmy? Why are you just observing us? Are you just waiting for Gordon 7.14, or are you afraid to admit you caved?
My prediction for his post tommorow.
"Despite not getting any support from SOME people on this site, posting here has helped me a lot. I thank those who have sent me a PM. sorry I couldn't respond. Time constraints. To the people who reached out to me with your digits, it meant the world. I hope I will never have to use any of them. To those that asked for my digits, I will get you them as soon as my cell phone works out here. To my support network, and you know who you are, thank you for standing up for me while everyone turned me into a group joke.
I made it!
James Gordon- Day 100"
This thread is so cool. I have to hold down the page down key for like 2 minutes to get to the end and it goes off the right side of the page. Can't even read slug's original post.
I am personally holding out hope for a post tomorrow since it is the Gordon of May. What will we do if he doesn't appear...for the love of god!
JG Meta 4!
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm afraid the worst news we could all fear is upon us. Our idol, nay, our demigod, the source of Gordonian physics and Gordesian coordinates has deemed us no longer worthy of his comradarie, and has removed himself now and forevermore from the rolls of May 2014.
James Gordon, if one day in the future, thou deem it within your will to join us again, even if only for a brief interlude, we will welcome your return almost as excitedly as the expected return of the Almighty! Please don't forget us as you spread your awesome quit karma across the known Gordiverse.
Does this mean its time to rework the header and rename the quit train?
Has El Gordo finally jumped the shark?
If he doesn't show up for Day 100, he has no value to me.
Maybe he will brighten up the August 2014 Roll Call with some sporadic and bizarre posts, become a source of intrigue, then become a source of great amusement, then become a laughing stock, then become annoying.
A sad day indeed. I shed a tear like the indian looking at the trash dump.
I'm old, and this reference is older than me.
LOL! I'm old too- and i remember it- but i think it's from the days when my parents could only afford a black and white tv, because i see it in black n white. I think it's from hippy days!
I don't understand...why isn't he here anymore?? How did he formally leave?? Please tell me this isn't true!
Okay, I must clarify, this was my assumption based on the fact that he lurks online but doesn't post roll with us anymore. He hasn't officially denounced us, but does it matter, he's done so by his actions. He has foresaken us in the moment of our greatest need.
Damnit Sap!
I have been existing on the illusion of JamesGordon622 for weeks now. Don't burst my bubble.
so you're telling me there's a chance I could still see ole Gordo post a 100?!?!?!?!?! What a fucking emotional roller coaster this Thursday has become!!!
I'm betting he has been drafting his HOF speech!!!
This has all come way too far for no HOF speech. If jg622 won't write it, I believe our resident ghost writer laureate has something prepared...
Paul S? Care to chime in?
Now we have one anonymous lurker... Could it be the illusive Fat Jimmy?
I'm here.. I didn't want to disappoint all of you.
Yes 100 days.. Still not easy but still off the can.
Made it through 10 days and Disney with the family and the first couple weeks of Turkey season.
No 100 day speech for me. I will write my speech in 900 more days
HE LIVES!
There is a god!
Congrats on the 100 days Gordo... Glad you stopped by!
No worries, JG622. Your HOF speech arrives in T minus 1.5 hours...
JamesGordon- I am looking forward to your 1000 day Speech. At that time you should have accumulated approximately 100 total posts, which, if you were the garden variety half-assed poster, would be the number you should have today. But you are far from the garden variety half-assed poster, we all know that by now. You are a whole new breed.
As always, I am completely stunned whenever I read something by El Gordo.
I'm not ready to talk about this one yet, but might have some close analysis later.
Paul, looking forward to your speech.
Congrats, JG! Now, how about posting roll with us?
Well, gentleman, here we are. Today, Fat Jimmie hits Hegelonfinkelshcneit with all his May brethren. Not all of them, really, just the ones with 7.14285714285714+ Gordons. Some of you aren’t there yet, but I won’t judge. I realize it’s been roughly 1.489352414127 Gordons since my last post, but I’ve logged on every few hours to make sure this secret society’s internet domain was still intact. Based on my original interpretation of Hegelonfinkelschneit, I expected to see the “Naked, Pasty-White Selfie Angry Birds” app on the Android marketplace. Maybe it’s only for Apple. I hate apples. But I’ll keep looking. Maybe you all are waiting on the “quitters” who haven’t hit as many Gordons as I have before you launch it. I sure hope it’s free to download.
Before I get to my words of gratitude, I really need to fill you “quitters” (LOL) in on the goings-on in the world of the “Hombre con Huevos de Oro.” (OMG Krusty that made me lmao). I don’t know how you guys know so much about me, but you’re amazing. Holding a degree in German, I obviously had to google it word-by-word to be sure, but as it turns out, I really do like it when mom scrambles my eggs to a nice golden color. I’d take a warm, sloppy mouthful of anybody’s yummy huevos EDD!!! LOL your acronyms…I’m pretty sure it means either “every damn day” or “explosive diarrhea discharge”. Either one makes contextual sense here, so I’ll refrain from further differentiation.
In other happenings, the “Nick beast” (That’s dad’s name, you guys just spell it wrong) finally made me apply for a job, so I did. That day was bad from the start, and I had a nice can of dip (sour cream and onion) and a bag of Ruffles to calm my nerves. First, I had to shower, which is not on my list of favorite things. After a thorough scrubbing of the portions of my undercarriage which were reachable (I used mom’s loofa scrubbie, btw. It smelled SOOOO good so I sniffed it for like an hour), I rinsed off and realized that removing all that caked-up baby oil created a significant amount of dry skin. And I had to stand there for awhile because my Gordo-pubes were clogging the drain. What a crappy drain. Mom knew I was stressed, so she lathered me back up with lotion. All I can say is that slapping the ham to that episode was the closest thing to real violence I will likely ever experience. So on my way to the place I was applying, I got pulled over in mom’s Oldsmobile. Apparently it isn’t okay to drive 5.327143989519385 Gordons per hour in a 2.587238502932 zone. I told the guy it was only like a Gordon and a half over, but he made a big deal of it. What a jerk. It might have been that RickDiculous character that jumps on our site every now and then. My reflection in his Ray-Bans made my mom’s Oldsmobile look skinny. Weird!
So I finally got to the Tire Lube place I was applying to (not real big on tires, but HUGE on lube) and went in to apply. They asked if I had any experience in automotive, and I proceeded to tell the manager on duty that I was a world-class bad-ass in Grand Theft Auto: Las Vegas. He thought it was funny, so I kept on with the jokes. After about 10 minutes, he totally quit laughing and called the police. Same jerk with the sunglasses showed up and told me to leave. I haven’t yet heard back to see if I got the job, though I’m optimistic. Must be a lot of interviews still to do—that’s my guess anyway. As you all are totally aware, I’m normally really good at reading between the lines.
So on the way home, I just flat out Killed the Can. As it turns out, Ruffles don’t have Ridges post-colon. Write that one down. Fact. The problem was that I was still in Mom’s Oldsmobile. So I pulled into a K-Mart parking lot, took her license plate off and left the car where it sat. I was almost home, so it was no biggie. It’s been a cold Spring in “Minnie” so I was glad to have the extra warmth as I hoofed it for about a half-mile. Mom was soooo mad. But that’s okay. She spanked me pretty thoroughly, so I turned around and thoroughly spanked it again if you know what I mean.
So in retrospect, that partial-Gordon wasn’t so bad. I had two “Flog-the-dolphin” sessions before lunch. Check-mate.
And now for a few expressions of gratitude from “Fat Jimmie”. This site has empowered me to embrace my inner-Jimmie and even speak occasionally in third-person.
I'd like to thank mom and all my May brethren. Mostly mom, though. Mom, you have no idea how much help you've been. Thanks for always being there for me and resetting the wireless router everytime I stomp my feet and yell upstairs. For you MayHAM (yum) guys, thanks for being there every Gordon or so, and for using all those emoticons LOL. You guys really do crack me up. IMHO You should make one wearing an apron and flour-covered. Also, to my mom, thanks for washing those socks, even though you know they don't go on my feet. And thanks for using triple coupons on Brawny paper towels. I get backed up sometimes during marathon gaming sessions, and I hate when I take it out by Gordo-varnishing Grandma's old coffee table you let me keep down here in the basement. Mom, I also appreciate when you come downstairs and change the lightbulb. You know I like it dark down here, but seeing your midriff when you stand on that Little Giant and reach is automatic spank-tank material.
Thanks to those of you who PM’ed me and offered to post roll or something like that. Sounds like some B.S. administrative tasks meant to suppress the brotherhood of this site, so I don’t want us to get caught up in those kinds of details. I’m glad I didn’t have to go through this journey alone. I “Quit” with each and every one of you—within reason, of course; I’m not one to overcommit.
And thank you to RickDiculous and Pinched (before you changed it) for your Avatars. Dang. You guys must be total chick magnets.
I feel like my Intro speech was a little vague on a few points, so let me take a stab at clarifying them. A couple of you have asked me where the 622 suffix came from. I’m 40 now. That number actually has a triple-meaning in my life. First and foremost, it’s my weight in Gordo-grams. (1Kg = 2.6 Gg). I prefer to use the metric system as the baseline calculation because it allows me to feel a little better about my endowment in specific anatomical regions than do the measurements by standard units. Secondly, if you divide 622 by 1 Standard Gordon, you get roughly 87. That’s the number of non-Gordon days I went in a row once without eating a vegetable. Huge accomplishment followed closely thereafter by a huge bowel movement. Kill the Can, says I. 622 also happens to be the number of 1-on-1 Warcraft victories I had when I joined your site, which was about 3.5 Gordons or so ago now. I’ll never forget that day. Even as I made my first post, I remember wondering how anybody would keep up with my high level of commitment. It looks like only a dozen or so of you could. The rest of you guys aren’t even at this mark yet. Hang in there, though. Keep your chins up and keep on “quitting”. 622 is also my personal record for the number of times I “Dated Miss Michigan” in a single Standard Gordon. Thank GOD mom is a Mary Kay rep. Their replenishing cream works wonders on a guy that likes to “Shoot for the socks” with the frequency I do.
I’d continue writing for another 7/16ths of a Gordon, but I don’t want to cramp up my hands because I can hear the girl scout troop meeting upstairs and I know these palms will get a workout thinking about that later. I’ll continue to check in with you fine quitters every Gordon or so. Stay vigilant, my dear anonymous friends. Please do not fret if I make assertions about a 10-day trip to Disney (because people really do go to Disney for that amount of time…they’re called seasonal workers) or occasionally write in BOLD LETTERS or ALL CAPS. That’s just some pent-up frustrations because I can’t “badger the witness” when mom’s friends are over. My greasiest, pube-laden, mom-smelling Gordo-hugs to each of you.
In closing, I’d like to convey my emotions by mis-quoting King Leonidas’ Character in the Movie ‘300’. “Tonight, we dine in mom’s basement and Gordo-varnish a sock in honor of the Snowflakes. Especially Paul S…So Hot.”
Damn, that's funny...
"that's fucking hilarious. I damn near pissed myself" -slug.go
I'm in tears. I love Mayhem.
Doc Chewfree! I told you it was gordograms! Exclamation points!!!!
Here you go, Lipi.
-
James Gordon - Day 64 Feels like the first 2 weeks but I will make it!
James, you posted day 50 on 3/26 (your first day on roll), then come back two weeks later and post day 64? Not how this works. Either post roll EVERY DAMN DAY or be gone. If damn near every one else in May can come in here on a daily basis, you sure as hell can, too. Whoever is keeping the Spreadsheet this week, I recommend leaving Mr. Gordon on page 3 until he posts 5 straight days.
Get with us, James, we're pulling for you!
bump
back up there
Who the hell is James Gordon? Is this a May member? I'm confused.
JamesGordon is a showman. He is mysterious. He shows up when he wants to.
Gordo- if you really want to blow peoples minds, this time don't just take 2 weeks off, take about 5 weeks off. Then just show up on day 100! James FUCKING Gordon! Hall of Fame on three fucking posts! It will be incredible.
You can be like the Haley's Comet of Project Mayhem. Every 5 weeks you blow through the roll call, changing peoples lives, the life of the party. It will be fucking awesome.
Seriously bro- you need to post roll. Right now you are just stopped, and as soon as you have a lame excuse, you will hit the chongo again.
No one even knew you were a part of the group. I am all about self-accountability, but are you really even a member here?
Maybe he's actually Matt Damon. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnPWJOJYVKc)
back on top, Claude Rains!
need to keep this on top until we hear from our international man of mystery
Bumperooney
With a dude like el Gordo, we might have to keep this ball in the air for weeks until he finally sees it. But when he does, I am sure he will inspire and amaze us with his answers.
Maybe he's a time traveler!?! :ph43r: 'qt' 'winker'
This is liquid gold -- by the time Who-the-fuck-is-James-Gordon reads this, he'll have his own FB fan page (sorry Lipi), probably a theme song, and very likely be Dos Equis' Most Interesting Man in the World.
"I don't always post roll, but when I do, I prefer to do it JamesGordon style."
I think we just found a new motto -- and mascot -- for this page.
Here's to everyone on this page / site that gets it. Quit with all of you.
Flux capacitor maybe??? Delorian?
Needed to Post- Mayhem Style-- but putting this future cautionary tale on 'How not to Quit' back on Top
He's John Galt! (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Galt)
I'm actually named after Ayn Rand... My pops is an interesting dude _
Hey guys, sorry I haven't posted in a while. Life has gotten a little weird lately. I don't have a computer, or a phone......... Oh shit, wrong group. Sorry May!!!!
Don't take the lame asses. Protect your quits!!!! Post roll every damn day!!!!
He's actually in May 2124. No biggie. Just goes to show you shouldn't tinker with wormholes in the early/late stages of your quit.
bumpsky to the top
This is literally going to have to stay here for a month before he sees it. My apologies for continuing the massive quote vortex.
I was feeling a little low this morning, due to no appearances from JamesGordon. I clicked on his name, seeking inspiration.
Unfortunately, it looks as if he has been back to site since he was "discovered" by Project Mayhem. He undoubtedly saw the almost cult-like following he has acquired, but didn't comment on it, and didn't post roll.
Part of me is hoping he is going to follow my plan, and will come back in a blaze of glory on day 100. I think its more likely that he wasn't ready for the responsibilities and increased scrutiny that come with being a celebrity.
Gordo- vaya con dios, we hardly knew you.
He's almost a folk hero at this point. Shrouded in mystery and hailing from a different time. A time where quits were won with minimal involvement. Let's hope this doesn't end up being yet another cautionary tale.
To quote Sir Winston Churchill on James Gordon, 'I cannot forecast the actions of JamesGordon. He is a riddle, wrapped up in a mystery, inside an enigma.'
I was going to post support roll today but instead...how small can we get Slug's first post...
my god this shit is getting ridiculous
QLF, E14D w/JamesGordon
It's no fun until the first post is a single column of letters......
Bump to shrink the slug
That sounds dirty
2 cents
I'm quit like James Gordon
13eezee - qlf with jamesgordon!
Bumpfix
I can't begin to express how thrilled I am that Mayhem and its loyal supporters have rallied together behind the bold path charted by Jimmy Gordo, aka Fat Jimmy. His time is of such value that for our meager little page (and site) to even get two appearances by his Epic-ness is something we should embrace. Only a chosen few get the sacred invitation to join his elite band of posters. Maybe they're lingering, maybe they're not. Small minded folk such as ourselves will never know. They are the chosen ones. The Ghost Posters. The Ghosters?
- Krusty (sorry for the bump)
Do not let this vortex die!! JamesGordon, only your return will end this madness.
When this is all said and done, JamesGordon and May 14 shall be legendary within KTC. Drink it in brethren.
Though the quit is hard and the craves tough, I shall not despair for I hear the return of James Gordon on the horizon, yea, even knocking on the outer door as we speak. I will continue to wait for James Gordon.
Sending James Gordon into the abyss
I'm not sure if that last post means that we are supposed to stop talking about El Gordo, but this vortex made me spit fake chew on my computer and laugh several times.
"Fat Jimmy" is the greatest nickname that Gordon ever had.
I think Fat Jimmy is the most fun I have had on this site. The dude will be mentioned prominently in my HOF speech. Thanks for noticing him Slug.go. To think his subtle presence might have gone unnoticed without your vigilance.
I think people like this are toxic to our cause. So, if the outer door is properly tyled then no one shall enter except for those who are worthy of our cause. Which is to stay quit.
Like the Toxic Avenger, just not as cool or mutated. Actually that means he's nothing like Toxie. RIP
Let us not give up the cause, Mayhem, but keep fighting the good fight! Slug.go's OP is down to two words per line, let us push it to singles!
Sorry I've missed this guys been catching up on sleep and emails. Many pissed of people I'm dealing with, but this epicness has helped relieve some stress. Thank you James Gordon
We all owe Fat Jimmy so much, he has helped us all by showing us how a true quitter should act.
Fat Jimmy is like the Incredible Hulk/Mormon we all knew when we were children.
If you scroll up and down real quick on the post string it is kind of psychedelic. Reminds me of climbing Mt. Fuji with Zillah cowboy in my younger days. Going for one word per line for Slug!!!!
I love, love, love, that this quote vortex was the first thing I saw after the two days of downtime.
Maybe he's Flash Gordon, here and gone in a flash!
Back to the top.
QLJG, E14D!
Everyone needs to breathe a deep sigh of relief, despite the heart palpitations caused by Bizarro World May Roll Call. I checked once, twice, fee-tines-a-mady (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOLH9QF-NnI (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOLH9QF-NnI)) and -- I'm not kidding, gents -- Fat Jimmy has not made an appearance since the new world order came into existence. By my rough math, he's on day 70 today (Tues the 15th). If we're men of our word, this quote vortex has at least 30 more days and potentially one more platform transfer before Fat Jimmy graces us with his third post as he saunters into the HOF. Fat Jimmy: like a boss.
...and the legend continues.
We mustn't give this up lest Fat Jimmy think we've stopped caring!
QLJG E14D
It brings a tear to my eye knowing how proud Fat Jimmy would be if he could see all the inspiration he has caused...
Have you ever been so far even as decided to use go want to look more like?
RickD... are you ok? Did you have a stroke when you wrote that comment?
I love the fact that most of slug's original post is now down to single words...
Yesterday would have been perfect. May 14 had 3 days of 100% posting followed by a week of double digit debauchery. Fat Jimminy G is crying in his cheerios.
My biggest fear is that Fat Jimmy posts roll, but this vortex is buried somewhere and he doesn't see it.
It's like a signal fire, we need to keep it burning at all times.
The new format may confuse him if he ever did come back.....but, back to the top any way :-)
I'm pretty sure that slug's OP is literally going to disappear haha. Fat Jimmy, one way or another we will make sure you see this.
Reading back through every single post in this vortex takes about 10 minutes.... well, at least once you're done hallucinating and your eyes stop bleeding, it does.
Hi guys, my name is James Gordon. I’m just an ordinary guy with some extraordinary gifts. I found KTC when I was Googling a place to get some decent fried chicken. Apparently I fat-fingered and missed the “F” in the middle. It’s too stinking close to the “T”. Anyhow, I was emotionally compelled by some of the stories of anguish, distress, and poor roll posting (or something like that)I found in the Mayhem Group. It resonated deeply within my soul. Even though I don’t dip, I wanted so badly to connect. Now I think I have found a home.
Like most of you, it has been a long, cold Winter here in Minneapolis. I guess it hasnÂ’t been that long, really, itÂ’s just that IÂ’ve never had the chance to play World of Warcraft in my parentsÂ’ basement between sessions of surfing barely-legal (maybe?) porn sites for eight months straight. By the way, if any of you know a schoolgirl that likes lollipops and ball gags, PM me. But thatÂ’s the only reason you should PM me.
I was born in 1974 to a middle-class family on the upper East side of the city. Dad works a respectable job at an automotive plant, mom is a den-mother for the girl scouts and bakes a lot. I like when she bakes and I get to see her all covered in flour, you know what I mean? Love you, mom!
Anyway, back to the whole “my extraordinary gifts” thing: I actually hold a couple of fancy degrees. First, I earned a B.S. in Math from Fraud University when I was just 17. I’m a proud FU alumni. There were some tough courses in that program, such as counting days. I figured out quickly that I wasn’t going to be an accountant. I also took one called “The Joke’s on you”, but I didn’t do so hot. So I changed majors again, switching to Physics. I actually figured out the secret to unlocking the whole space-time continuum thing. It’s cool because I can jack off while playing Call of Duty without having to pause the game. It also helps me pick out a brotherhood of “quitters” (you guys shouldn’t refer to yourselves in such a demeaning way) wherein I can post once every two weeks or so, while virtually fast-forwarding my quit just past the halfway point the HOF. I haven’t figured out what that acronym means exactly, but I’m pretty sure it stands for “Hegelonfinkelschneit”, which is German for “A secret brotherhood where we eventually get to build our own Angry Birds app using pictures of our naked, fat, pale selfies”. In any case, I’m in. I also majored in German, if you couldn’t tell.
So anyway, my parents have been on me since I was 22 to get my own place. I’m just not into it. I’m 40 and doing just fine on this couch. In fact, this couch has my morbidly obese frame perfectly imprinted on it with the corresponding outline of body grease. Or maybe it’s the baby lotion. Ah, it all runs together anyway. So when some of you guys say you’ve “fought the beast” for 18 years, I feel you on that. The beast to me is the overbearing father in my life that told me to get a job.
Another thing I’m pretty awesome at is dependability. That’s something I’ve long considered an attribute. Mom even let me guest-speak at the girl scout troop meeting once. Greatest day of my life (wink, wink). But I made them come downstairs. Mom was so annoying that day. She had like 80 yankee candles going. Not sure what that was about. So when people ask me if I’m the real thing, I’m just like, “Sure, I’m James Gordon”. And usually they don’t say much after that. But I know they know.
IÂ’m also good at following instructions and paying attention to detail. One of the dudes on your site, some Slug.go (OMG I hope thatÂ’s not his real name LOL) guy, told me something about roll. I shut my browser window real fast, which IÂ’m used to doing because mom spanks me when she catches me flogging the dolphin to lesbian scenes. Anyway, I went upstairs and asked mom to make me some rolls. We had the greatest flour fight ever. She doesnÂ’t know it, but I filed that memory in the spank tank for laterÂ…
So about the space-time continuum thing: It’s pretty cool that I’ve been a “quitter” (again, you guys shouldn’t be so hard on yourselves) for a couple of days. I’m putting this in my Intro because I’m not sure if some of the Veterans are keen enough to realize that my days are actually entire weeks for some of them. But I feel like maybe my time-warp skills are fading, because it feels like hours now between slap-the-ham sessions for me.
Some of you guys are talking about wives and kids and “quitting” for them. I’m not one to judge, but that may be a poor example for your offspring. I had a date once. Unfortunately, the cold Minnesota Winter locked up the internet connection and my Oovoo account froze up just like Lake Superior. Anyway, I’m not sure she was really a girl, but it doesn’t matter.
Whoever named me fat Jimmie sure hit the nail on the head. You guys are so smart (except that whole “quitting dip” thing). I personally won’t give up dip. You guys are missing out, IMHO. If you’ve never had a Ruffles potato chip delicately lathered in Ranch, you’re letting the best in life pass you by.
Anyway, I saw something about intros and decided I’d chime in. You guys may not hear from me until we cross the bridge into “Hegelonfinkelschneit” together, but that’s okay. It’s only one day in the life of James Gordon.
As for your website, I browsed it for a few minutes and figured out what KTC stands for. Kill the Can. I totally get it. Sometimes after a chicken and potato chip binge, I absolutely can do some of that action. Have any of you guys ever “roughed up the suspect” while sitting on the potty? You should try it!
So basically, thatÂ’s me. IÂ’m kind of like a fat Chuck Norris ninja-type with the ability to fast-forward time and not miss anything at all. And I was serious about that lollipop and ball-gag thing.
I can’t wait to Hegelonfinkelschneit with all of you. Especially Paul S. For being a serious “quitter” with such a sunny disposition, he seems like a decent enough guy for being from Kentucky. I’m pretty sure he’s probably like 6’3” and athletically built with a respectable job and a monster truck, but I’d kind of like him to hurl a nude Angry Bird Selfie at me.
Gotta run guys, momÂ’s making hot cross buns. They make a huge mess, and she gets on me for stomping when I want something because she says it messes up the dough. But it will get all over her, and she might even let me lick the spoon.
*Disclaimer: this is not intended to offend fried chicken fans, gamers, girl scouts, or residents of the Greater Twin Cities Metropolitan area.
Ladies and Gentleman- James Fucking Gordon.
Paul S, I'm a little pissed about this, because after Slug.go's suggestion of someone ghosting an intro for Fat Jim, I was envisioning a contest of sorts, with several people taking a shot at the Bio. I just don't see a lot of people being able to create this type of Gordon universe. This is why they usually put all of the good people at the end of the talent show.
2 words....fucking epic
First things first...that "intro" is hands down the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen on this website, it isn't even a competition. Second, if we can get that "intro" down to single words, we truly are immortal gods.
Funniest fucking Intro ever. I tip my hat to the author. Can't wait for the movie to come out.
Back to the top, some may have missed this. Wonder if we can get this to be a page long? Could take years...
I'm curious to see how many years it will take. Challenge accepted.
For all of you Gordo watchers. His two weeks appearance is due today. Keep your eyes peeled for him, and keep this string at the top (bottom). QLF E14D
I put the over under at 6.5 days for El Gordo to show up again? Whatcha got? I'm going to be optimistic and say UNDER
Now it's time to continue the challenge and see how long it takes for this fucker to be a full page. VORTEX CONTINUE!!
Since Gordo is in the room, wanted to make sure he saw how his legend began
Few ppl will ever have the ability to capture so much attention....back to the front if the room!
JG meta 1
Wow.. I guess I'm the talk of the quit group.. Sorry I haven't posted everyday.
I thought this was a support group not a place to bash the people that are going through the same issues that you are.
Maybe this site is not for me.. I didn't realize that you had to post everyday. Sorry I can't.
I have been busy and trying my best to forget about this crazy habit that I have had for WAY 2 long.
78 days.
'Popcorn'
A support group by it's very nature requires your presence in order to be supported.
Posting roll daily is pretty much the only bloody rule we have.
I don't really know where to go with that, except to say that if you think the way to get to where your going is by showing up once every two weeks then no this site is probably not for you. Good luck.
And then...poof....he's gone.
I am screaming with fucking laughter.
DWD and Sapp are right, there is now way that was really James Gordon.
That was even funnier than Paul S's intro thread.
He ends it with "78 Days". I am fucking pissing myself whether that was a mod playing a joke or whether it was really him. Either way, it is the highlight of my day!!!!!!!!!
Who knew that James Gordon had "622" after his name?
This whole time I thought he was just JamesGordon.
Was that really him? How will we know?
Hey Gordon- if that was really you, please go back and read the whole thread. You have to start two weeks ago.
I will keep bumping this message to the bottom of the list so that you can see it when you log back in in two weeks, so that you see my suggestion, but by then the OP will be 4 weeks old. You have a lot of reading ahead of you, and not a lot of time apparently.
In reality, I think it is just too big a coincidence that some of the vets just today started bitching about us talking too much about El Gordo, and also the day that the scriptures predicted his next return. Its just too neat.
JG meta 2
If it is a joke, it has had me fooled for a Gordon and a half.
I am now proceeding with the assumption that it was really a post by James Gordon, and not a joke.
If that is the case, it is a fascinating post.
How much of the James Gordon threads did he read before he posted that?
Did he do all the way back?
How did he not know you are supposed to post roll every day?
If he didn't know you were supposed to post roll, why does he post roll at all?
Did he really intend to come back every two weeks...er... I... mean every full Gordon?
What if we never started the Gordon threads, would he have just posted to the hall of fame?
Would we have let him?
Why does he pick Wednesdays? Is hump day usually his toughest day?
I could go on forever. And none of these questions will ever be answered.
Fat Jimmy is blowing my mind, again.
Thank you James Gordon.
I look forward to day 92 a full Gordon from now.
Man i don't give a damn what anybody says, newby, maybe, veteran, that is some funny shit right there.
Totally agree. My ghost bio pales in comparison to this hilarity. Prophetic.
Who knew that in the span of two international standard Gordon's this class would unite in solidarity behind the stalwart leadership of James mother fucking Gordon.
I'm proud to be quit on this Gordon and for every Gordon henceforward and hitherto.
No kidding bro, I was thinking the same thing. James Gordon united this class like nothing else had before. The official whipping boy of May 14, and we thank you.
James Gordon...May2014's Haley's comet. You can set your fucking watch to him.
JamesGordon622...6x2+2=14. QLF E14D. Holy shit, this is how crop circles are laid out, and Stonehenge. Time traveler (fix from slug.go)
Four Gordons and seven years ago...Gordo influenced Lincoln's Gettysburg address
Classic, now we are 'bump fixing' Gordon posts
They are all too precious. Can't afford to miss one.
Crop circles!!!! Just awesome!!!!
How does the spreadsheet get formatted to the Gordon scale?
I can do an extra column that converts your quit days into international standard Gordon's. I'll do it tonight.
Now THAT'S brotherhood!!!
Sapper, you've got too much time on your hands. I agree with you that it is a hoax. Read his last roll post before this. Day 64-feels like the first two weeks...I call hilarious bullshit.
Not really, and it doesn't take long anyway, but regardless, this is so epic, I'll make time to create a new unit of time measurement. My goal is to see it in widespread use in the future. Somebody needs to start a Wikipedia page about James Gordon and Gordon's as a unit of measurement.
So...7.14 Gordons gets one in the HOF?
Yes sir, your math is solid.
Actually, the true value of Gordons to HOF has 14 decimal places. Here I've calculated the exact value of the number of Gordon's to HOF. We'll refer to this value as HOG's (Hall of Gordon's).
7.14285714285714
I was really hoping for an indeterminate number, like Pi, but oh well.
JG meta 3
I really don't know what the fuck is the problem with alot of you..
Here I am trying by best to quit this fucking deadly habit that I have and trying to make it through just one day without thinking about quitting.
But I'm getting major shit about not being able to post every day.
Sorry that I don't have to time to sit and chat all day long on this site. I'm lucky to get on the computer once a week just to check my own email.
So NO I will not be able to post every day.
I'm glad most of you are getting a kick out of it.
To all the folks that have said positive things and have sent positive IM's I thank you.
This site has helped me a ton besides all the inmature posting that SOME of you have posted.
James- I found your post. Let me address your points one at a time.
1. We're addicts, that is one problem we all have in common.
2. You don't get the way quitting here works. The rest of us are not trying to make it through the day without thinking about quitting. That is not an effective strategy to quit. If there were kids setting your house on fire with a book of matches, would you close your eyes and plug your ears, and hope they would be gone when you opened them?
3. You don't have to chat, you just have to post roll. When you practice, I bet you can get it done in less than a minute. You don't have one fucking minute? What is your profession? You can only get on a computer once a week? Are you stuck in the gimp box the rest of the week?
4. If you can't post every day, you can reach out to someone via text to post for you. If you don't want to that, you can FUCK off.
5. You sound sarcastic, but yes, most of us are getting a kick out of it, thanks.
6. I'm happy that people said positive things to you in a PM, did you reply? Or were you out of time?
7. How has it helped you a ton? You obviously didn't read much on the site. You are not posting roll regularly. Do you have a secret core group of supporters that just remained silent the last few weeks?
If you think the site is helping you now, imagine how much it would help you if you were participating, instead of being (as far as I know) the most legendarily half-assed member in the history of the history of the site.
If you stop your whining, and think about how things are supposed to work around here, and then how you do them, maybe you will get your shit together. If you don't, why should we give a shit?
To the bottom. Lipi speaks the truth James.
Effing Lipi.... Love that shit!! 'Popcorn'
'Popcorn' is exactly right!!
JG meta 4
If anyone wants to compile the insane list of conspiracy theories, be my guest. I can only go so far down the rabbit hole before it start staring back at me...
Bump just because this monster is fucking hilarious.
The Gordon622 threads should have their own pinned topic on the site, and a dedicated moderator tasked with adding new content and tracking the appearances of JG.Does anyone have an explaination from Fat Jimmy yet as to why he only gets 2 minutes per week on the computer, or are we still going with "stuck in Gimp Box"?
My HOG date is 6/13/14. No longer interested in HOF.
I thought for a second I was having a stroke when I saw this.....
Gordon's Constant 7.14285714285714 'roflmao'
I just have to say, this has been an epic discussion...
I hope this epicness never dies.
Has he made an appearance lately. I mean has 1 IGU been completed yet? I'm jonesing.
edit: Paul S still has the best addition to this clusterfuck. Dat intro...
So he posted a full Gordon on day 78, next Gordo will be day 92. Biq question: does he break with Gordo cycle posting and post day 100...or wait until day 106? Vegas odds are 4:1 he posts day 100, then is never heard from again. Greatest trick the Gordo ever performed was making people think he didn't exist. Stay Gordo my friends.
I cannot wait to write his HOG speech...Epic, part deux. Stay Gordon indeed. I have a rough draft ready.
But to Lippi's point on the intro, a contest is probably in order. I'll write mine on HOG+1 non-ISG day. But here's a snippet:
"I'd like to thank mom and all my May brethren. Mostly mom, though. Mom, you have no idea how much help you've been. Thanks for always being there for me and resetting the wireless router everytime I stomp my feet and yell upstairs. For you May guys, thanks for being there every Gordon or so, and for using all those emoticons LOL. You guys really do crack me up. IMHO You should make one wearing an apron and flour-covered. Also, to my mom, thanks for washing those socks, even though you know they don't go on my feet. And thanks for using triple coupons on Brawny paper towels. I get backed up sometimes during marathon gaming sessions, and I hate when I take it out by Gordo-varnishing Grandma's old coffee table.
For all you guys that PM'ed me, I sort of appreciate it, but was expecting more of a schoolgirl/ball-gag hookup. Unless the goth thing was a joke, in which case I could make that work I guess. Same skirt, anyway. I know you guys advised me to post or to text you. I appreciate that. I'll definitely PM you back when I get to HOFx8 here in a few ISGs. The 622 isn't one to fly solo, as you all know by now.
To Ridiculous (sp?) I'm not sure what meta JG 1 means, but I think it's like that basketball player Meta World Peace, though I think he uses two "t's". You might have meant that and just spelled it wrong. It happens, man. Keep your chin up. I'll keep my chins up too. I've got like 5 LOL. Metta World Peace is a wierd name, but sounds bad-you-know-what (mom will yell at me if I type a$$). I think you all know what word I'm talking about."
Is there even a point in having the contest? Paul S, you are the ghost writer of Mayhem...just wouldn't seem right any other way...
622 bitches
Fuck the contest. Paul already won the contest. He truly understands the ways of Gordon.
Anyone remember this guy?
It's been so long.....where the fuck is JamesGordon????
It's only been like 2/3 of a Gordon. (rough math, obviously...Gordon's cannot be measured in fractions)
'Finger' 'Remshot' '40'
Fuck it, I'll take part in helping revive this beast.
He looks to have logged on Saturday, but no post.
He must be building anticipation. Or he caved during his 7th Gordon. I have heard that the 7th Gordon is especially tough on dudes attempting their fifth roll post.
Gordo's on day 97 today...Thursday will be watershed event of a magnitude never witnessed by mere mortals.
An Associated Press dispatch just announced that there will be a full vote of Congress on Thursday, May 15, 2014 to vote on a legislative act proclaiming that day a new national holiday. In one of the only instances of unified bipartisan support since the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, both houses of Congress are expected to bypass floor debate and go straight to a vote, with no opposition expected. Although the specific wording has yet to be finalized, May 15th is expected to be forever known as either "Fat Jimmy Day" or "The Day that JamesGordon Roared". Proposed Spanish translations are varied, but Hispanic communities are coalescing around "El dia del hombre con huevos de oro" which, loosely translated, means "The Day of the Man with Golden Balls". The White House is enthusiastically supporting the new proposed federal holiday, but would like to see Congress go further, suggesting that it would welcome the idea of all Thursdays hereafter referred to as Gordays.
That's.hilarious Krusty! I'm on pins and needles waiting for Thursday!
Holy hell... I gotta get in this... This is hilarious.. I just busted up laughing during a "boring" meeting at this shit... Boss is probably pissed, but I don't have to see him until the Gorday after next.
El dia del hombre con huevos de oro --- F'ing genious! That is my new battle cry in quit!
I can't wait to see Fat Jimmy's HOG speech courtesy of Paul S. I've been looking forward to it for Gordon's on end.
I've been tracking Fat Jimmy, and he was on-line again this morning, still no post.
What is happening Fat Jimmy? Why are you just observing us? Are you just waiting for Gordon 7.14, or are you afraid to admit you caved?
My prediction for his post tommorow.
"Despite not getting any support from SOME people on this site, posting here has helped me a lot. I thank those who have sent me a PM. sorry I couldn't respond. Time constraints. To the people who reached out to me with your digits, it meant the world. I hope I will never have to use any of them. To those that asked for my digits, I will get you them as soon as my cell phone works out here. To my support network, and you know who you are, thank you for standing up for me while everyone turned me into a group joke.
I made it!
James Gordon- Day 100"
This thread is so cool. I have to hold down the page down key for like 2 minutes to get to the end and it goes off the right side of the page. Can't even read slug's original post.
I am personally holding out hope for a post tomorrow since it is the Gordon of May. What will we do if he doesn't appear...for the love of god!
JG Meta 4!
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm afraid the worst news we could all fear is upon us. Our idol, nay, our demigod, the source of Gordonian physics and Gordesian coordinates has deemed us no longer worthy of his comradarie, and has removed himself now and forevermore from the rolls of May 2014.
James Gordon, if one day in the future, thou deem it within your will to join us again, even if only for a brief interlude, we will welcome your return almost as excitedly as the expected return of the Almighty! Please don't forget us as you spread your awesome quit karma across the known Gordiverse.
Does this mean its time to rework the header and rename the quit train?
Has El Gordo finally jumped the shark?
If he doesn't show up for Day 100, he has no value to me.
Maybe he will brighten up the August 2014 Roll Call with some sporadic and bizarre posts, become a source of intrigue, then become a source of great amusement, then become a laughing stock, then become annoying.
A sad day indeed. I shed a tear like the indian looking at the trash dump.
I'm old, and this reference is older than me.
LOL! I'm old too- and i remember it- but i think it's from the days when my parents could only afford a black and white tv, because i see it in black n white. I think it's from hippy days!
I don't understand...why isn't he here anymore?? How did he formally leave?? Please tell me this isn't true!
Okay, I must clarify, this was my assumption based on the fact that he lurks online but doesn't post roll with us anymore. He hasn't officially denounced us, but does it matter, he's done so by his actions. He has foresaken us in the moment of our greatest need.
Damnit Sap!
I have been existing on the illusion of JamesGordon622 for weeks now. Don't burst my bubble.
so you're telling me there's a chance I could still see ole Gordo post a 100?!?!?!?!?! What a fucking emotional roller coaster this Thursday has become!!!
I'm betting he has been drafting his HOF speech!!!
This has all come way too far for no HOF speech. If jg622 won't write it, I believe our resident ghost writer laureate has something prepared...
Paul S? Care to chime in?
Now we have one anonymous lurker... Could it be the illusive Fat Jimmy?
I'm here.. I didn't want to disappoint all of you.
Yes 100 days.. Still not easy but still off the can.
Made it through 10 days and Disney with the family and the first couple weeks of Turkey season.
No 100 day speech for me. I will write my speech in 900 more days
HE LIVES!
There is a god!
Congrats on the 100 days Gordo... Glad you stopped by!
No worries, JG622. Your HOF speech arrives in T minus 1.5 hours...
JamesGordon- I am looking forward to your 1000 day Speech. At that time you should have accumulated approximately 100 total posts, which, if you were the garden variety half-assed poster, would be the number you should have today. But you are far from the garden variety half-assed poster, we all know that by now. You are a whole new breed.
As always, I am completely stunned whenever I read something by El Gordo.
I'm not ready to talk about this one yet, but might have some close analysis later.
Paul, looking forward to your speech.
Congrats, JG! Now, how about posting roll with us?
Well, gentleman, here we are. Today, Fat Jimmie hits Hegelonfinkelshcneit with all his May brethren. Not all of them, really, just the ones with 7.14285714285714+ Gordons. Some of you aren’t there yet, but I won’t judge. I realize it’s been roughly 1.489352414127 Gordons since my last post, but I’ve logged on every few hours to make sure this secret society’s internet domain was still intact. Based on my original interpretation of Hegelonfinkelschneit, I expected to see the “Naked, Pasty-White Selfie Angry Birds” app on the Android marketplace. Maybe it’s only for Apple. I hate apples. But I’ll keep looking. Maybe you all are waiting on the “quitters” who haven’t hit as many Gordons as I have before you launch it. I sure hope it’s free to download.
Before I get to my words of gratitude, I really need to fill you “quitters” (LOL) in on the goings-on in the world of the “Hombre con Huevos de Oro.” (OMG Krusty that made me lmao). I don’t know how you guys know so much about me, but you’re amazing. Holding a degree in German, I obviously had to google it word-by-word to be sure, but as it turns out, I really do like it when mom scrambles my eggs to a nice golden color. I’d take a warm, sloppy mouthful of anybody’s yummy huevos EDD!!! LOL your acronyms…I’m pretty sure it means either “every damn day” or “explosive diarrhea discharge”. Either one makes contextual sense here, so I’ll refrain from further differentiation.
In other happenings, the “Nick beast” (That’s dad’s name, you guys just spell it wrong) finally made me apply for a job, so I did. That day was bad from the start, and I had a nice can of dip (sour cream and onion) and a bag of Ruffles to calm my nerves. First, I had to shower, which is not on my list of favorite things. After a thorough scrubbing of the portions of my undercarriage which were reachable (I used mom’s loofa scrubbie, btw. It smelled SOOOO good so I sniffed it for like an hour), I rinsed off and realized that removing all that caked-up baby oil created a significant amount of dry skin. And I had to stand there for awhile because my Gordo-pubes were clogging the drain. What a crappy drain. Mom knew I was stressed, so she lathered me back up with lotion. All I can say is that slapping the ham to that episode was the closest thing to real violence I will likely ever experience. So on my way to the place I was applying, I got pulled over in mom’s Oldsmobile. Apparently it isn’t okay to drive 5.327143989519385 Gordons per hour in a 2.587238502932 zone. I told the guy it was only like a Gordon and a half over, but he made a big deal of it. What a jerk. It might have been that RickDiculous character that jumps on our site every now and then. My reflection in his Ray-Bans made my mom’s Oldsmobile look skinny. Weird!
So I finally got to the Tire Lube place I was applying to (not real big on tires, but HUGE on lube) and went in to apply. They asked if I had any experience in automotive, and I proceeded to tell the manager on duty that I was a world-class bad-ass in Grand Theft Auto: Las Vegas. He thought it was funny, so I kept on with the jokes. After about 10 minutes, he totally quit laughing and called the police. Same jerk with the sunglasses showed up and told me to leave. I haven’t yet heard back to see if I got the job, though I’m optimistic. Must be a lot of interviews still to do—that’s my guess anyway. As you all are totally aware, I’m normally really good at reading between the lines.
So on the way home, I just flat out Killed the Can. As it turns out, Ruffles don’t have Ridges post-colon. Write that one down. Fact. The problem was that I was still in Mom’s Oldsmobile. So I pulled into a K-Mart parking lot, took her license plate off and left the car where it sat. I was almost home, so it was no biggie. It’s been a cold Spring in “Minnie” so I was glad to have the extra warmth as I hoofed it for about a half-mile. Mom was soooo mad. But that’s okay. She spanked me pretty thoroughly, so I turned around and thoroughly spanked it again if you know what I mean.
So in retrospect, that partial-Gordon wasn’t so bad. I had two “Flog-the-dolphin” sessions before lunch. Check-mate.
And now for a few expressions of gratitude from “Fat Jimmie”. This site has empowered me to embrace my inner-Jimmie and even speak occasionally in third-person.
I'd like to thank mom and all my May brethren. Mostly mom, though. Mom, you have no idea how much help you've been. Thanks for always being there for me and resetting the wireless router everytime I stomp my feet and yell upstairs. For you MayHAM (yum) guys, thanks for being there every Gordon or so, and for using all those emoticons LOL. You guys really do crack me up. IMHO You should make one wearing an apron and flour-covered. Also, to my mom, thanks for washing those socks, even though you know they don't go on my feet. And thanks for using triple coupons on Brawny paper towels. I get backed up sometimes during marathon gaming sessions, and I hate when I take it out by Gordo-varnishing Grandma's old coffee table you let me keep down here in the basement. Mom, I also appreciate when you come downstairs and change the lightbulb. You know I like it dark down here, but seeing your midriff when you stand on that Little Giant and reach is automatic spank-tank material.
Thanks to those of you who PM’ed me and offered to post roll or something like that. Sounds like some B.S. administrative tasks meant to suppress the brotherhood of this site, so I don’t want us to get caught up in those kinds of details. I’m glad I didn’t have to go through this journey alone. I “Quit” with each and every one of you—within reason, of course; I’m not one to overcommit.
And thank you to RickDiculous and Pinched (before you changed it) for your Avatars. Dang. You guys must be total chick magnets.
I feel like my Intro speech was a little vague on a few points, so let me take a stab at clarifying them. A couple of you have asked me where the 622 suffix came from. I’m 40 now. That number actually has a triple-meaning in my life. First and foremost, it’s my weight in Gordo-grams. (1Kg = 2.6 Gg). I prefer to use the metric system as the baseline calculation because it allows me to feel a little better about my endowment in specific anatomical regions than do the measurements by standard units. Secondly, if you divide 622 by 1 Standard Gordon, you get roughly 87. That’s the number of non-Gordon days I went in a row once without eating a vegetable. Huge accomplishment followed closely thereafter by a huge bowel movement. Kill the Can, says I. 622 also happens to be the number of 1-on-1 Warcraft victories I had when I joined your site, which was about 3.5 Gordons or so ago now. I’ll never forget that day. Even as I made my first post, I remember wondering how anybody would keep up with my high level of commitment. It looks like only a dozen or so of you could. The rest of you guys aren’t even at this mark yet. Hang in there, though. Keep your chins up and keep on “quitting”. 622 is also my personal record for the number of times I “Dated Miss Michigan” in a single Standard Gordon. Thank GOD mom is a Mary Kay rep. Their replenishing cream works wonders on a guy that likes to “Shoot for the socks” with the frequency I do.
I’d continue writing for another 7/16ths of a Gordon, but I don’t want to cramp up my hands because I can hear the girl scout troop meeting upstairs and I know these palms will get a workout thinking about that later. I’ll continue to check in with you fine quitters every Gordon or so. Stay vigilant, my dear anonymous friends. Please do not fret if I make assertions about a 10-day trip to Disney (because people really do go to Disney for that amount of time…they’re called seasonal workers) or occasionally write in BOLD LETTERS or ALL CAPS. That’s just some pent-up frustrations because I can’t “badger the witness” when mom’s friends are over. My greasiest, pube-laden, mom-smelling Gordo-hugs to each of you.
In closing, I’d like to convey my emotions by mis-quoting King Leonidas’ Character in the Movie ‘300’. “Tonight, we dine in mom’s basement and Gordo-varnish a sock in honor of the Snowflakes. Especially Paul S…So Hot.”
Damn, that's funny...
"that's fucking hilarious. I damn near pissed myself" -slug.go
I'm in tears. I love Mayhem.
Doc Chewfree! I told you it was gordograms! Exclamation points!!!!
Here you go, Lipi.
Some sort of parallel Gortex happening in here......
-
James Gordon - Day 64 Feels like the first 2 weeks but I will make it!
James, you posted day 50 on 3/26 (your first day on roll), then come back two weeks later and post day 64? Not how this works. Either post roll EVERY DAMN DAY or be gone. If damn near every one else in May can come in here on a daily basis, you sure as hell can, too. Whoever is keeping the Spreadsheet this week, I recommend leaving Mr. Gordon on page 3 until he posts 5 straight days.
Get with us, James, we're pulling for you!
bump
back up there
Who the hell is James Gordon? Is this a May member? I'm confused.
JamesGordon is a showman. He is mysterious. He shows up when he wants to.
Gordo- if you really want to blow peoples minds, this time don't just take 2 weeks off, take about 5 weeks off. Then just show up on day 100! James FUCKING Gordon! Hall of Fame on three fucking posts! It will be incredible.
You can be like the Haley's Comet of Project Mayhem. Every 5 weeks you blow through the roll call, changing peoples lives, the life of the party. It will be fucking awesome.
Seriously bro- you need to post roll. Right now you are just stopped, and as soon as you have a lame excuse, you will hit the chongo again.
No one even knew you were a part of the group. I am all about self-accountability, but are you really even a member here?
Maybe he's actually Matt Damon. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnPWJOJYVKc)
back on top, Claude Rains!
need to keep this on top until we hear from our international man of mystery
Bumperooney
With a dude like el Gordo, we might have to keep this ball in the air for weeks until he finally sees it. But when he does, I am sure he will inspire and amaze us with his answers.
Maybe he's a time traveler!?! :ph43r: 'qt' 'winker'
This is liquid gold -- by the time Who-the-fuck-is-James-Gordon reads this, he'll have his own FB fan page (sorry Lipi), probably a theme song, and very likely be Dos Equis' Most Interesting Man in the World.
"I don't always post roll, but when I do, I prefer to do it JamesGordon style."
I think we just found a new motto -- and mascot -- for this page.
Here's to everyone on this page / site that gets it. Quit with all of you.
Flux capacitor maybe??? Delorian?
Needed to Post- Mayhem Style-- but putting this future cautionary tale on 'How not to Quit' back on Top
He's John Galt! (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Galt)
I'm actually named after Ayn Rand... My pops is an interesting dude _
Hey guys, sorry I haven't posted in a while. Life has gotten a little weird lately. I don't have a computer, or a phone......... Oh shit, wrong group. Sorry May!!!!
Don't take the lame asses. Protect your quits!!!! Post roll every damn day!!!!
He's actually in May 2124. No biggie. Just goes to show you shouldn't tinker with wormholes in the early/late stages of your quit.
bumpsky to the top
This is literally going to have to stay here for a month before he sees it. My apologies for continuing the massive quote vortex.
I was feeling a little low this morning, due to no appearances from JamesGordon. I clicked on his name, seeking inspiration.
Unfortunately, it looks as if he has been back to site since he was "discovered" by Project Mayhem. He undoubtedly saw the almost cult-like following he has acquired, but didn't comment on it, and didn't post roll.
Part of me is hoping he is going to follow my plan, and will come back in a blaze of glory on day 100. I think its more likely that he wasn't ready for the responsibilities and increased scrutiny that come with being a celebrity.
Gordo- vaya con dios, we hardly knew you.
He's almost a folk hero at this point. Shrouded in mystery and hailing from a different time. A time where quits were won with minimal involvement. Let's hope this doesn't end up being yet another cautionary tale.
To quote Sir Winston Churchill on James Gordon, 'I cannot forecast the actions of JamesGordon. He is a riddle, wrapped up in a mystery, inside an enigma.'
I was going to post support roll today but instead...how small can we get Slug's first post...
my god this shit is getting ridiculous
QLF, E14D w/JamesGordon
It's no fun until the first post is a single column of letters......
Bump to shrink the slug
That sounds dirty
2 cents
I'm quit like James Gordon
13eezee - qlf with jamesgordon!
Bumpfix
I can't begin to express how thrilled I am that Mayhem and its loyal supporters have rallied together behind the bold path charted by Jimmy Gordo, aka Fat Jimmy. His time is of such value that for our meager little page (and site) to even get two appearances by his Epic-ness is something we should embrace. Only a chosen few get the sacred invitation to join his elite band of posters. Maybe they're lingering, maybe they're not. Small minded folk such as ourselves will never know. They are the chosen ones. The Ghost Posters. The Ghosters?
- Krusty (sorry for the bump)
Do not let this vortex die!! JamesGordon, only your return will end this madness.
When this is all said and done, JamesGordon and May 14 shall be legendary within KTC. Drink it in brethren.
Though the quit is hard and the craves tough, I shall not despair for I hear the return of James Gordon on the horizon, yea, even knocking on the outer door as we speak. I will continue to wait for James Gordon.
Sending James Gordon into the abyss
I'm not sure if that last post means that we are supposed to stop talking about El Gordo, but this vortex made me spit fake chew on my computer and laugh several times.
"Fat Jimmy" is the greatest nickname that Gordon ever had.
I think Fat Jimmy is the most fun I have had on this site. The dude will be mentioned prominently in my HOF speech. Thanks for noticing him Slug.go. To think his subtle presence might have gone unnoticed without your vigilance.
I think people like this are toxic to our cause. So, if the outer door is properly tyled then no one shall enter except for those who are worthy of our cause. Which is to stay quit.
Like the Toxic Avenger, just not as cool or mutated. Actually that means he's nothing like Toxie. RIP
Let us not give up the cause, Mayhem, but keep fighting the good fight! Slug.go's OP is down to two words per line, let us push it to singles!
Sorry I've missed this guys been catching up on sleep and emails. Many pissed of people I'm dealing with, but this epicness has helped relieve some stress. Thank you James Gordon
We all owe Fat Jimmy so much, he has helped us all by showing us how a true quitter should act.
Fat Jimmy is like the Incredible Hulk/Mormon we all knew when we were children.
If you scroll up and down real quick on the post string it is kind of psychedelic. Reminds me of climbing Mt. Fuji with Zillah cowboy in my younger days. Going for one word per line for Slug!!!!
I love, love, love, that this quote vortex was the first thing I saw after the two days of downtime.
Maybe he's Flash Gordon, here and gone in a flash!
Back to the top.
QLJG, E14D!
Everyone needs to breathe a deep sigh of relief, despite the heart palpitations caused by Bizarro World May Roll Call. I checked once, twice, fee-tines-a-mady (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOLH9QF-NnI (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOLH9QF-NnI)) and -- I'm not kidding, gents -- Fat Jimmy has not made an appearance since the new world order came into existence. By my rough math, he's on day 70 today (Tues the 15th). If we're men of our word, this quote vortex has at least 30 more days and potentially one more platform transfer before Fat Jimmy graces us with his third post as he saunters into the HOF. Fat Jimmy: like a boss.
...and the legend continues.
We mustn't give this up lest Fat Jimmy think we've stopped caring!
QLJG E14D
It brings a tear to my eye knowing how proud Fat Jimmy would be if he could see all the inspiration he has caused...
Have you ever been so far even as decided to use go want to look more like?
RickD... are you ok? Did you have a stroke when you wrote that comment?
I love the fact that most of slug's original post is now down to single words...
Yesterday would have been perfect. May 14 had 3 days of 100% posting followed by a week of double digit debauchery. Fat Jimminy G is crying in his cheerios.
My biggest fear is that Fat Jimmy posts roll, but this vortex is buried somewhere and he doesn't see it.
It's like a signal fire, we need to keep it burning at all times.
The new format may confuse him if he ever did come back.....but, back to the top any way :-)
I'm pretty sure that slug's OP is literally going to disappear haha. Fat Jimmy, one way or another we will make sure you see this.
Reading back through every single post in this vortex takes about 10 minutes.... well, at least once you're done hallucinating and your eyes stop bleeding, it does.
Hi guys, my name is James Gordon. I’m just an ordinary guy with some extraordinary gifts. I found KTC when I was Googling a place to get some decent fried chicken. Apparently I fat-fingered and missed the “F” in the middle. It’s too stinking close to the “T”. Anyhow, I was emotionally compelled by some of the stories of anguish, distress, and poor roll posting (or something like that)I found in the Mayhem Group. It resonated deeply within my soul. Even though I don’t dip, I wanted so badly to connect. Now I think I have found a home.
Like most of you, it has been a long, cold Winter here in Minneapolis. I guess it hasnÂ’t been that long, really, itÂ’s just that IÂ’ve never had the chance to play World of Warcraft in my parentsÂ’ basement between sessions of surfing barely-legal (maybe?) porn sites for eight months straight. By the way, if any of you know a schoolgirl that likes lollipops and ball gags, PM me. But thatÂ’s the only reason you should PM me.
I was born in 1974 to a middle-class family on the upper East side of the city. Dad works a respectable job at an automotive plant, mom is a den-mother for the girl scouts and bakes a lot. I like when she bakes and I get to see her all covered in flour, you know what I mean? Love you, mom!
Anyway, back to the whole “my extraordinary gifts” thing: I actually hold a couple of fancy degrees. First, I earned a B.S. in Math from Fraud University when I was just 17. I’m a proud FU alumni. There were some tough courses in that program, such as counting days. I figured out quickly that I wasn’t going to be an accountant. I also took one called “The Joke’s on you”, but I didn’t do so hot. So I changed majors again, switching to Physics. I actually figured out the secret to unlocking the whole space-time continuum thing. It’s cool because I can jack off while playing Call of Duty without having to pause the game. It also helps me pick out a brotherhood of “quitters” (you guys shouldn’t refer to yourselves in such a demeaning way) wherein I can post once every two weeks or so, while virtually fast-forwarding my quit just past the halfway point the HOF. I haven’t figured out what that acronym means exactly, but I’m pretty sure it stands for “Hegelonfinkelschneit”, which is German for “A secret brotherhood where we eventually get to build our own Angry Birds app using pictures of our naked, fat, pale selfies”. In any case, I’m in. I also majored in German, if you couldn’t tell.
So anyway, my parents have been on me since I was 22 to get my own place. I’m just not into it. I’m 40 and doing just fine on this couch. In fact, this couch has my morbidly obese frame perfectly imprinted on it with the corresponding outline of body grease. Or maybe it’s the baby lotion. Ah, it all runs together anyway. So when some of you guys say you’ve “fought the beast” for 18 years, I feel you on that. The beast to me is the overbearing father in my life that told me to get a job.
Another thing I’m pretty awesome at is dependability. That’s something I’ve long considered an attribute. Mom even let me guest-speak at the girl scout troop meeting once. Greatest day of my life (wink, wink). But I made them come downstairs. Mom was so annoying that day. She had like 80 yankee candles going. Not sure what that was about. So when people ask me if I’m the real thing, I’m just like, “Sure, I’m James Gordon”. And usually they don’t say much after that. But I know they know.
IÂ’m also good at following instructions and paying attention to detail. One of the dudes on your site, some Slug.go (OMG I hope thatÂ’s not his real name LOL) guy, told me something about roll. I shut my browser window real fast, which IÂ’m used to doing because mom spanks me when she catches me flogging the dolphin to lesbian scenes. Anyway, I went upstairs and asked mom to make me some rolls. We had the greatest flour fight ever. She doesnÂ’t know it, but I filed that memory in the spank tank for laterÂ…
So about the space-time continuum thing: It’s pretty cool that I’ve been a “quitter” (again, you guys shouldn’t be so hard on yourselves) for a couple of days. I’m putting this in my Intro because I’m not sure if some of the Veterans are keen enough to realize that my days are actually entire weeks for some of them. But I feel like maybe my time-warp skills are fading, because it feels like hours now between slap-the-ham sessions for me.
Some of you guys are talking about wives and kids and “quitting” for them. I’m not one to judge, but that may be a poor example for your offspring. I had a date once. Unfortunately, the cold Minnesota Winter locked up the internet connection and my Oovoo account froze up just like Lake Superior. Anyway, I’m not sure she was really a girl, but it doesn’t matter.
Whoever named me fat Jimmie sure hit the nail on the head. You guys are so smart (except that whole “quitting dip” thing). I personally won’t give up dip. You guys are missing out, IMHO. If you’ve never had a Ruffles potato chip delicately lathered in Ranch, you’re letting the best in life pass you by.
Anyway, I saw something about intros and decided I’d chime in. You guys may not hear from me until we cross the bridge into “Hegelonfinkelschneit” together, but that’s okay. It’s only one day in the life of James Gordon.
As for your website, I browsed it for a few minutes and figured out what KTC stands for. Kill the Can. I totally get it. Sometimes after a chicken and potato chip binge, I absolutely can do some of that action. Have any of you guys ever “roughed up the suspect” while sitting on the potty? You should try it!
So basically, thatÂ’s me. IÂ’m kind of like a fat Chuck Norris ninja-type with the ability to fast-forward time and not miss anything at all. And I was serious about that lollipop and ball-gag thing.
I can’t wait to Hegelonfinkelschneit with all of you. Especially Paul S. For being a serious “quitter” with such a sunny disposition, he seems like a decent enough guy for being from Kentucky. I’m pretty sure he’s probably like 6’3” and athletically built with a respectable job and a monster truck, but I’d kind of like him to hurl a nude Angry Bird Selfie at me.
Gotta run guys, momÂ’s making hot cross buns. They make a huge mess, and she gets on me for stomping when I want something because she says it messes up the dough. But it will get all over her, and she might even let me lick the spoon.
*Disclaimer: this is not intended to offend fried chicken fans, gamers, girl scouts, or residents of the Greater Twin Cities Metropolitan area.
Ladies and Gentleman- James Fucking Gordon.
Paul S, I'm a little pissed about this, because after Slug.go's suggestion of someone ghosting an intro for Fat Jim, I was envisioning a contest of sorts, with several people taking a shot at the Bio. I just don't see a lot of people being able to create this type of Gordon universe. This is why they usually put all of the good people at the end of the talent show.
2 words....fucking epic
First things first...that "intro" is hands down the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen on this website, it isn't even a competition. Second, if we can get that "intro" down to single words, we truly are immortal gods.
Funniest fucking Intro ever. I tip my hat to the author. Can't wait for the movie to come out.
Back to the top, some may have missed this. Wonder if we can get this to be a page long? Could take years...
I'm curious to see how many years it will take. Challenge accepted.
For all of you Gordo watchers. His two weeks appearance is due today. Keep your eyes peeled for him, and keep this string at the top (bottom). QLF E14D
I put the over under at 6.5 days for El Gordo to show up again? Whatcha got? I'm going to be optimistic and say UNDER
Now it's time to continue the challenge and see how long it takes for this fucker to be a full page. VORTEX CONTINUE!!
Since Gordo is in the room, wanted to make sure he saw how his legend began
Few ppl will ever have the ability to capture so much attention....back to the front if the room!
JG meta 1
Wow.. I guess I'm the talk of the quit group.. Sorry I haven't posted everyday.
I thought this was a support group not a place to bash the people that are going through the same issues that you are.
Maybe this site is not for me.. I didn't realize that you had to post everyday. Sorry I can't.
I have been busy and trying my best to forget about this crazy habit that I have had for WAY 2 long.
78 days.
'Popcorn'
A support group by it's very nature requires your presence in order to be supported.
Posting roll daily is pretty much the only bloody rule we have.
I don't really know where to go with that, except to say that if you think the way to get to where your going is by showing up once every two weeks then no this site is probably not for you. Good luck.
And then...poof....he's gone.
I am screaming with fucking laughter.
DWD and Sapp are right, there is now way that was really James Gordon.
That was even funnier than Paul S's intro thread.
He ends it with "78 Days". I am fucking pissing myself whether that was a mod playing a joke or whether it was really him. Either way, it is the highlight of my day!!!!!!!!!
Who knew that James Gordon had "622" after his name?
This whole time I thought he was just JamesGordon.
Was that really him? How will we know?
Hey Gordon- if that was really you, please go back and read the whole thread. You have to start two weeks ago.
I will keep bumping this message to the bottom of the list so that you can see it when you log back in in two weeks, so that you see my suggestion, but by then the OP will be 4 weeks old. You have a lot of reading ahead of you, and not a lot of time apparently.
In reality, I think it is just too big a coincidence that some of the vets just today started bitching about us talking too much about El Gordo, and also the day that the scriptures predicted his next return. Its just too neat.
JG meta 2
If it is a joke, it has had me fooled for a Gordon and a half.
I am now proceeding with the assumption that it was really a post by James Gordon, and not a joke.
If that is the case, it is a fascinating post.
How much of the James Gordon threads did he read before he posted that?
Did he do all the way back?
How did he not know you are supposed to post roll every day?
If he didn't know you were supposed to post roll, why does he post roll at all?
Did he really intend to come back every two weeks...er... I... mean every full Gordon?
What if we never started the Gordon threads, would he have just posted to the hall of fame?
Would we have let him?
Why does he pick Wednesdays? Is hump day usually his toughest day?
I could go on forever. And none of these questions will ever be answered.
Fat Jimmy is blowing my mind, again.
Thank you James Gordon.
I look forward to day 92 a full Gordon from now.
Man i don't give a damn what anybody says, newby, maybe, veteran, that is some funny shit right there.
Totally agree. My ghost bio pales in comparison to this hilarity. Prophetic.
Who knew that in the span of two international standard Gordon's this class would unite in solidarity behind the stalwart leadership of James mother fucking Gordon.
I'm proud to be quit on this Gordon and for every Gordon henceforward and hitherto.
No kidding bro, I was thinking the same thing. James Gordon united this class like nothing else had before. The official whipping boy of May 14, and we thank you.
James Gordon...May2014's Haley's comet. You can set your fucking watch to him.
JamesGordon622...6x2+2=14. QLF E14D. Holy shit, this is how crop circles are laid out, and Stonehenge. Time traveler (fix from slug.go)
Four Gordons and seven years ago...Gordo influenced Lincoln's Gettysburg address
Classic, now we are 'bump fixing' Gordon posts
They are all too precious. Can't afford to miss one.
Crop circles!!!! Just awesome!!!!
How does the spreadsheet get formatted to the Gordon scale?
I can do an extra column that converts your quit days into international standard Gordon's. I'll do it tonight.
Now THAT'S brotherhood!!!
Sapper, you've got too much time on your hands. I agree with you that it is a hoax. Read his last roll post before this. Day 64-feels like the first two weeks...I call hilarious bullshit.
Not really, and it doesn't take long anyway, but regardless, this is so epic, I'll make time to create a new unit of time measurement. My goal is to see it in widespread use in the future. Somebody needs to start a Wikipedia page about James Gordon and Gordon's as a unit of measurement.
So...7.14 Gordons gets one in the HOF?
Yes sir, your math is solid.
Actually, the true value of Gordons to HOF has 14 decimal places. Here I've calculated the exact value of the number of Gordon's to HOF. We'll refer to this value as HOG's (Hall of Gordon's).
7.14285714285714
I was really hoping for an indeterminate number, like Pi, but oh well.
JG meta 3
I really don't know what the fuck is the problem with alot of you..
Here I am trying by best to quit this fucking deadly habit that I have and trying to make it through just one day without thinking about quitting.
But I'm getting major shit about not being able to post every day.
Sorry that I don't have to time to sit and chat all day long on this site. I'm lucky to get on the computer once a week just to check my own email.
So NO I will not be able to post every day.
I'm glad most of you are getting a kick out of it.
To all the folks that have said positive things and have sent positive IM's I thank you.
This site has helped me a ton besides all the inmature posting that SOME of you have posted.
James- I found your post. Let me address your points one at a time.
1. We're addicts, that is one problem we all have in common.
2. You don't get the way quitting here works. The rest of us are not trying to make it through the day without thinking about quitting. That is not an effective strategy to quit. If there were kids setting your house on fire with a book of matches, would you close your eyes and plug your ears, and hope they would be gone when you opened them?
3. You don't have to chat, you just have to post roll. When you practice, I bet you can get it done in less than a minute. You don't have one fucking minute? What is your profession? You can only get on a computer once a week? Are you stuck in the gimp box the rest of the week?
4. If you can't post every day, you can reach out to someone via text to post for you. If you don't want to that, you can FUCK off.
5. You sound sarcastic, but yes, most of us are getting a kick out of it, thanks.
6. I'm happy that people said positive things to you in a PM, did you reply? Or were you out of time?
7. How has it helped you a ton? You obviously didn't read much on the site. You are not posting roll regularly. Do you have a secret core group of supporters that just remained silent the last few weeks?
If you think the site is helping you now, imagine how much it would help you if you were participating, instead of being (as far as I know) the most legendarily half-assed member in the history of the history of the site.
If you stop your whining, and think about how things are supposed to work around here, and then how you do them, maybe you will get your shit together. If you don't, why should we give a shit?
To the bottom. Lipi speaks the truth James.
Effing Lipi.... Love that shit!! 'Popcorn'
'Popcorn' is exactly right!!
JG meta 4
If anyone wants to compile the insane list of conspiracy theories, be my guest. I can only go so far down the rabbit hole before it start staring back at me...
Bump just because this monster is fucking hilarious.
The Gordon622 threads should have their own pinned topic on the site, and a dedicated moderator tasked with adding new content and tracking the appearances of JG.Does anyone have an explaination from Fat Jimmy yet as to why he only gets 2 minutes per week on the computer, or are we still going with "stuck in Gimp Box"?
My HOG date is 6/13/14. No longer interested in HOF.
I thought for a second I was having a stroke when I saw this.....
Gordon's Constant 7.14285714285714 'roflmao'
I just have to say, this has been an epic discussion...
I hope this epicness never dies.
Has he made an appearance lately. I mean has 1 IGU been completed yet? I'm jonesing.
edit: Paul S still has the best addition to this clusterfuck. Dat intro...
So he posted a full Gordon on day 78, next Gordo will be day 92. Biq question: does he break with Gordo cycle posting and post day 100...or wait until day 106? Vegas odds are 4:1 he posts day 100, then is never heard from again. Greatest trick the Gordo ever performed was making people think he didn't exist. Stay Gordo my friends.
I cannot wait to write his HOG speech...Epic, part deux. Stay Gordon indeed. I have a rough draft ready.
But to Lippi's point on the intro, a contest is probably in order. I'll write mine on HOG+1 non-ISG day. But here's a snippet:
"I'd like to thank mom and all my May brethren. Mostly mom, though. Mom, you have no idea how much help you've been. Thanks for always being there for me and resetting the wireless router everytime I stomp my feet and yell upstairs. For you May guys, thanks for being there every Gordon or so, and for using all those emoticons LOL. You guys really do crack me up. IMHO You should make one wearing an apron and flour-covered. Also, to my mom, thanks for washing those socks, even though you know they don't go on my feet. And thanks for using triple coupons on Brawny paper towels. I get backed up sometimes during marathon gaming sessions, and I hate when I take it out by Gordo-varnishing Grandma's old coffee table.
For all you guys that PM'ed me, I sort of appreciate it, but was expecting more of a schoolgirl/ball-gag hookup. Unless the goth thing was a joke, in which case I could make that work I guess. Same skirt, anyway. I know you guys advised me to post or to text you. I appreciate that. I'll definitely PM you back when I get to HOFx8 here in a few ISGs. The 622 isn't one to fly solo, as you all know by now.
To Ridiculous (sp?) I'm not sure what meta JG 1 means, but I think it's like that basketball player Meta World Peace, though I think he uses two "t's". You might have meant that and just spelled it wrong. It happens, man. Keep your chin up. I'll keep my chins up too. I've got like 5 LOL. Metta World Peace is a wierd name, but sounds bad-you-know-what (mom will yell at me if I type a$$). I think you all know what word I'm talking about."
Is there even a point in having the contest? Paul S, you are the ghost writer of Mayhem...just wouldn't seem right any other way...
622 bitches
Fuck the contest. Paul already won the contest. He truly understands the ways of Gordon.
Anyone remember this guy?
It's been so long.....where the fuck is JamesGordon????
It's only been like 2/3 of a Gordon. (rough math, obviously...Gordon's cannot be measured in fractions)
'Finger' 'Remshot' '40'
Fuck it, I'll take part in helping revive this beast.
He looks to have logged on Saturday, but no post.
He must be building anticipation. Or he caved during his 7th Gordon. I have heard that the 7th Gordon is especially tough on dudes attempting their fifth roll post.
Gordo's on day 97 today...Thursday will be watershed event of a magnitude never witnessed by mere mortals.
An Associated Press dispatch just announced that there will be a full vote of Congress on Thursday, May 15, 2014 to vote on a legislative act proclaiming that day a new national holiday. In one of the only instances of unified bipartisan support since the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, both houses of Congress are expected to bypass floor debate and go straight to a vote, with no opposition expected. Although the specific wording has yet to be finalized, May 15th is expected to be forever known as either "Fat Jimmy Day" or "The Day that JamesGordon Roared". Proposed Spanish translations are varied, but Hispanic communities are coalescing around "El dia del hombre con huevos de oro" which, loosely translated, means "The Day of the Man with Golden Balls". The White House is enthusiastically supporting the new proposed federal holiday, but would like to see Congress go further, suggesting that it would welcome the idea of all Thursdays hereafter referred to as Gordays.
That's.hilarious Krusty! I'm on pins and needles waiting for Thursday!
Holy hell... I gotta get in this... This is hilarious.. I just busted up laughing during a "boring" meeting at this shit... Boss is probably pissed, but I don't have to see him until the Gorday after next.
El dia del hombre con huevos de oro --- F'ing genious! That is my new battle cry in quit!
I can't wait to see Fat Jimmy's HOG speech courtesy of Paul S. I've been looking forward to it for Gordon's on end.
I've been tracking Fat Jimmy, and he was on-line again this morning, still no post.
What is happening Fat Jimmy? Why are you just observing us? Are you just waiting for Gordon 7.14, or are you afraid to admit you caved?
My prediction for his post tommorow.
"Despite not getting any support from SOME people on this site, posting here has helped me a lot. I thank those who have sent me a PM. sorry I couldn't respond. Time constraints. To the people who reached out to me with your digits, it meant the world. I hope I will never have to use any of them. To those that asked for my digits, I will get you them as soon as my cell phone works out here. To my support network, and you know who you are, thank you for standing up for me while everyone turned me into a group joke.
I made it!
James Gordon- Day 100"
This thread is so cool. I have to hold down the page down key for like 2 minutes to get to the end and it goes off the right side of the page. Can't even read slug's original post.
I am personally holding out hope for a post tomorrow since it is the Gordon of May. What will we do if he doesn't appear...for the love of god!
JG Meta 4!
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm afraid the worst news we could all fear is upon us. Our idol, nay, our demigod, the source of Gordonian physics and Gordesian coordinates has deemed us no longer worthy of his comradarie, and has removed himself now and forevermore from the rolls of May 2014.
James Gordon, if one day in the future, thou deem it within your will to join us again, even if only for a brief interlude, we will welcome your return almost as excitedly as the expected return of the Almighty! Please don't forget us as you spread your awesome quit karma across the known Gordiverse.
Does this mean its time to rework the header and rename the quit train?
Has El Gordo finally jumped the shark?
If he doesn't show up for Day 100, he has no value to me.
Maybe he will brighten up the August 2014 Roll Call with some sporadic and bizarre posts, become a source of intrigue, then become a source of great amusement, then become a laughing stock, then become annoying.
A sad day indeed. I shed a tear like the indian looking at the trash dump.
I'm old, and this reference is older than me.
LOL! I'm old too- and i remember it- but i think it's from the days when my parents could only afford a black and white tv, because i see it in black n white. I think it's from hippy days!
I don't understand...why isn't he here anymore?? How did he formally leave?? Please tell me this isn't true!
Okay, I must clarify, this was my assumption based on the fact that he lurks online but doesn't post roll with us anymore. He hasn't officially denounced us, but does it matter, he's done so by his actions. He has foresaken us in the moment of our greatest need.
Damnit Sap!
I have been existing on the illusion of JamesGordon622 for weeks now. Don't burst my bubble.
so you're telling me there's a chance I could still see ole Gordo post a 100?!?!?!?!?! What a fucking emotional roller coaster this Thursday has become!!!
I'm betting he has been drafting his HOF speech!!!
This has all come way too far for no HOF speech. If jg622 won't write it, I believe our resident ghost writer laureate has something prepared...
Paul S? Care to chime in?
Now we have one anonymous lurker... Could it be the illusive Fat Jimmy?
I'm here.. I didn't want to disappoint all of you.
Yes 100 days.. Still not easy but still off the can.
Made it through 10 days and Disney with the family and the first couple weeks of Turkey season.
No 100 day speech for me. I will write my speech in 900 more days
HE LIVES!
There is a god!
Congrats on the 100 days Gordo... Glad you stopped by!
No worries, JG622. Your HOF speech arrives in T minus 1.5 hours...
JamesGordon- I am looking forward to your 1000 day Speech. At that time you should have accumulated approximately 100 total posts, which, if you were the garden variety half-assed poster, would be the number you should have today. But you are far from the garden variety half-assed poster, we all know that by now. You are a whole new breed.
As always, I am completely stunned whenever I read something by El Gordo.
I'm not ready to talk about this one yet, but might have some close analysis later.
Paul, looking forward to your speech.
Congrats, JG! Now, how about posting roll with us?
Well, gentleman, here we are. Today, Fat Jimmie hits Hegelonfinkelshcneit with all his May brethren. Not all of them, really, just the ones with 7.14285714285714+ Gordons. Some of you aren’t there yet, but I won’t judge. I realize it’s been roughly 1.489352414127 Gordons since my last post, but I’ve logged on every few hours to make sure this secret society’s internet domain was still intact. Based on my original interpretation of Hegelonfinkelschneit, I expected to see the “Naked, Pasty-White Selfie Angry Birds” app on the Android marketplace. Maybe it’s only for Apple. I hate apples. But I’ll keep looking. Maybe you all are waiting on the “quitters” who haven’t hit as many Gordons as I have before you launch it. I sure hope it’s free to download.
Before I get to my words of gratitude, I really need to fill you “quitters” (LOL) in on the goings-on in the world of the “Hombre con Huevos de Oro.” (OMG Krusty that made me lmao). I don’t know how you guys know so much about me, but you’re amazing. Holding a degree in German, I obviously had to google it word-by-word to be sure, but as it turns out, I really do like it when mom scrambles my eggs to a nice golden color. I’d take a warm, sloppy mouthful of anybody’s yummy huevos EDD!!! LOL your acronyms…I’m pretty sure it means either “every damn day” or “explosive diarrhea discharge”. Either one makes contextual sense here, so I’ll refrain from further differentiation.
In other happenings, the “Nick beast” (That’s dad’s name, you guys just spell it wrong) finally made me apply for a job, so I did. That day was bad from the start, and I had a nice can of dip (sour cream and onion) and a bag of Ruffles to calm my nerves. First, I had to shower, which is not on my list of favorite things. After a thorough scrubbing of the portions of my undercarriage which were reachable (I used mom’s loofa scrubbie, btw. It smelled SOOOO good so I sniffed it for like an hour), I rinsed off and realized that removing all that caked-up baby oil created a significant amount of dry skin. And I had to stand there for awhile because my Gordo-pubes were clogging the drain. What a crappy drain. Mom knew I was stressed, so she lathered me back up with lotion. All I can say is that slapping the ham to that episode was the closest thing to real violence I will likely ever experience. So on my way to the place I was applying, I got pulled over in mom’s Oldsmobile. Apparently it isn’t okay to drive 5.327143989519385 Gordons per hour in a 2.587238502932 zone. I told the guy it was only like a Gordon and a half over, but he made a big deal of it. What a jerk. It might have been that RickDiculous character that jumps on our site every now and then. My reflection in his Ray-Bans made my mom’s Oldsmobile look skinny. Weird!
So I finally got to the Tire Lube place I was applying to (not real big on tires, but HUGE on lube) and went in to apply. They asked if I had any experience in automotive, and I proceeded to tell the manager on duty that I was a world-class bad-ass in Grand Theft Auto: Las Vegas. He thought it was funny, so I kept on with the jokes. After about 10 minutes, he totally quit laughing and called the police. Same jerk with the sunglasses showed up and told me to leave. I haven’t yet heard back to see if I got the job, though I’m optimistic. Must be a lot of interviews still to do—that’s my guess anyway. As you all are totally aware, I’m normally really good at reading between the lines.
So on the way home, I just flat out Killed the Can. As it turns out, Ruffles don’t have Ridges post-colon. Write that one down. Fact. The problem was that I was still in Mom’s Oldsmobile. So I pulled into a K-Mart parking lot, took her license plate off and left the car where it sat. I was almost home, so it was no biggie. It’s been a cold Spring in “Minnie” so I was glad to have the extra warmth as I hoofed it for about a half-mile. Mom was soooo mad. But that’s okay. She spanked me pretty thoroughly, so I turned around and thoroughly spanked it again if you know what I mean.
So in retrospect, that partial-Gordon wasn’t so bad. I had two “Flog-the-dolphin” sessions before lunch. Check-mate.
And now for a few expressions of gratitude from “Fat Jimmie”. This site has empowered me to embrace my inner-Jimmie and even speak occasionally in third-person.
I'd like to thank mom and all my May brethren. Mostly mom, though. Mom, you have no idea how much help you've been. Thanks for always being there for me and resetting the wireless router everytime I stomp my feet and yell upstairs. For you MayHAM (yum) guys, thanks for being there every Gordon or so, and for using all those emoticons LOL. You guys really do crack me up. IMHO You should make one wearing an apron and flour-covered. Also, to my mom, thanks for washing those socks, even though you know they don't go on my feet. And thanks for using triple coupons on Brawny paper towels. I get backed up sometimes during marathon gaming sessions, and I hate when I take it out by Gordo-varnishing Grandma's old coffee table you let me keep down here in the basement. Mom, I also appreciate when you come downstairs and change the lightbulb. You know I like it dark down here, but seeing your midriff when you stand on that Little Giant and reach is automatic spank-tank material.
Thanks to those of you who PM’ed me and offered to post roll or something like that. Sounds like some B.S. administrative tasks meant to suppress the brotherhood of this site, so I don’t want us to get caught up in those kinds of details. I’m glad I didn’t have to go through this journey alone. I “Quit” with each and every one of you—within reason, of course; I’m not one to overcommit.
And thank you to RickDiculous and Pinched (before you changed it) for your Avatars. Dang. You guys must be total chick magnets.
I feel like my Intro speech was a little vague on a few points, so let me take a stab at clarifying them. A couple of you have asked me where the 622 suffix came from. I’m 40 now. That number actually has a triple-meaning in my life. First and foremost, it’s my weight in Gordo-grams. (1Kg = 2.6 Gg). I prefer to use the metric system as the baseline calculation because it allows me to feel a little better about my endowment in specific anatomical regions than do the measurements by standard units. Secondly, if you divide 622 by 1 Standard Gordon, you get roughly 87. That’s the number of non-Gordon days I went in a row once without eating a vegetable. Huge accomplishment followed closely thereafter by a huge bowel movement. Kill the Can, says I. 622 also happens to be the number of 1-on-1 Warcraft victories I had when I joined your site, which was about 3.5 Gordons or so ago now. I’ll never forget that day. Even as I made my first post, I remember wondering how anybody would keep up with my high level of commitment. It looks like only a dozen or so of you could. The rest of you guys aren’t even at this mark yet. Hang in there, though. Keep your chins up and keep on “quitting”. 622 is also my personal record for the number of times I “Dated Miss Michigan” in a single Standard Gordon. Thank GOD mom is a Mary Kay rep. Their replenishing cream works wonders on a guy that likes to “Shoot for the socks” with the frequency I do.
I’d continue writing for another 7/16ths of a Gordon, but I don’t want to cramp up my hands because I can hear the girl scout troop meeting upstairs and I know these palms will get a workout thinking about that later. I’ll continue to check in with you fine quitters every Gordon or so. Stay vigilant, my dear anonymous friends. Please do not fret if I make assertions about a 10-day trip to Disney (because people really do go to Disney for that amount of time…they’re called seasonal workers) or occasionally write in BOLD LETTERS or ALL CAPS. That’s just some pent-up frustrations because I can’t “badger the witness” when mom’s friends are over. My greasiest, pube-laden, mom-smelling Gordo-hugs to each of you.
In closing, I’d like to convey my emotions by mis-quoting King Leonidas’ Character in the Movie ‘300’. “Tonight, we dine in mom’s basement and Gordo-varnish a sock in honor of the Snowflakes. Especially Paul S…So Hot.”
Damn, that's funny...
"that's fucking hilarious. I damn near pissed myself" -slug.go
I'm in tears. I love Mayhem.
Doc Chewfree! I told you it was gordograms! Exclamation points!!!!
Here you go, Lipi.
Some sort of parallel Gortex happening in here......
The actual Gordon posts in here are the really amazing part. It's like shaking hands with David Koresh or Jim Jones.
-
James Gordon - Day 64 Feels like the first 2 weeks but I will make it!
James, you posted day 50 on 3/26 (your first day on roll), then come back two weeks later and post day 64? Not how this works. Either post roll EVERY DAMN DAY or be gone. If damn near every one else in May can come in here on a daily basis, you sure as hell can, too. Whoever is keeping the Spreadsheet this week, I recommend leaving Mr. Gordon on page 3 until he posts 5 straight days.
Get with us, James, we're pulling for you!
bump
back up there
Who the hell is James Gordon? Is this a May member? I'm confused.
JamesGordon is a showman. He is mysterious. He shows up when he wants to.
Gordo- if you really want to blow peoples minds, this time don't just take 2 weeks off, take about 5 weeks off. Then just show up on day 100! James FUCKING Gordon! Hall of Fame on three fucking posts! It will be incredible.
You can be like the Haley's Comet of Project Mayhem. Every 5 weeks you blow through the roll call, changing peoples lives, the life of the party. It will be fucking awesome.
Seriously bro- you need to post roll. Right now you are just stopped, and as soon as you have a lame excuse, you will hit the chongo again.
No one even knew you were a part of the group. I am all about self-accountability, but are you really even a member here?
Maybe he's actually Matt Damon. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnPWJOJYVKc)
back on top, Claude Rains!
need to keep this on top until we hear from our international man of mystery
Bumperooney
With a dude like el Gordo, we might have to keep this ball in the air for weeks until he finally sees it. But when he does, I am sure he will inspire and amaze us with his answers.
Maybe he's a time traveler!?! :ph43r: 'qt' 'winker'
This is liquid gold -- by the time Who-the-fuck-is-James-Gordon reads this, he'll have his own FB fan page (sorry Lipi), probably a theme song, and very likely be Dos Equis' Most Interesting Man in the World.
"I don't always post roll, but when I do, I prefer to do it JamesGordon style."
I think we just found a new motto -- and mascot -- for this page.
Here's to everyone on this page / site that gets it. Quit with all of you.
Flux capacitor maybe??? Delorian?
Needed to Post- Mayhem Style-- but putting this future cautionary tale on 'How not to Quit' back on Top
He's John Galt! (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Galt)
I'm actually named after Ayn Rand... My pops is an interesting dude _
Hey guys, sorry I haven't posted in a while. Life has gotten a little weird lately. I don't have a computer, or a phone......... Oh shit, wrong group. Sorry May!!!!
Don't take the lame asses. Protect your quits!!!! Post roll every damn day!!!!
He's actually in May 2124. No biggie. Just goes to show you shouldn't tinker with wormholes in the early/late stages of your quit.
bumpsky to the top
This is literally going to have to stay here for a month before he sees it. My apologies for continuing the massive quote vortex.
I was feeling a little low this morning, due to no appearances from JamesGordon. I clicked on his name, seeking inspiration.
Unfortunately, it looks as if he has been back to site since he was "discovered" by Project Mayhem. He undoubtedly saw the almost cult-like following he has acquired, but didn't comment on it, and didn't post roll.
Part of me is hoping he is going to follow my plan, and will come back in a blaze of glory on day 100. I think its more likely that he wasn't ready for the responsibilities and increased scrutiny that come with being a celebrity.
Gordo- vaya con dios, we hardly knew you.
He's almost a folk hero at this point. Shrouded in mystery and hailing from a different time. A time where quits were won with minimal involvement. Let's hope this doesn't end up being yet another cautionary tale.
To quote Sir Winston Churchill on James Gordon, 'I cannot forecast the actions of JamesGordon. He is a riddle, wrapped up in a mystery, inside an enigma.'
I was going to post support roll today but instead...how small can we get Slug's first post...
my god this shit is getting ridiculous
QLF, E14D w/JamesGordon
It's no fun until the first post is a single column of letters......
Bump to shrink the slug
That sounds dirty
2 cents
I'm quit like James Gordon
13eezee - qlf with jamesgordon!
Bumpfix
I can't begin to express how thrilled I am that Mayhem and its loyal supporters have rallied together behind the bold path charted by Jimmy Gordo, aka Fat Jimmy. His time is of such value that for our meager little page (and site) to even get two appearances by his Epic-ness is something we should embrace. Only a chosen few get the sacred invitation to join his elite band of posters. Maybe they're lingering, maybe they're not. Small minded folk such as ourselves will never know. They are the chosen ones. The Ghost Posters. The Ghosters?
- Krusty (sorry for the bump)
Do not let this vortex die!! JamesGordon, only your return will end this madness.
When this is all said and done, JamesGordon and May 14 shall be legendary within KTC. Drink it in brethren.
Though the quit is hard and the craves tough, I shall not despair for I hear the return of James Gordon on the horizon, yea, even knocking on the outer door as we speak. I will continue to wait for James Gordon.
Sending James Gordon into the abyss
I'm not sure if that last post means that we are supposed to stop talking about El Gordo, but this vortex made me spit fake chew on my computer and laugh several times.
"Fat Jimmy" is the greatest nickname that Gordon ever had.
I think Fat Jimmy is the most fun I have had on this site. The dude will be mentioned prominently in my HOF speech. Thanks for noticing him Slug.go. To think his subtle presence might have gone unnoticed without your vigilance.
I think people like this are toxic to our cause. So, if the outer door is properly tyled then no one shall enter except for those who are worthy of our cause. Which is to stay quit.
Like the Toxic Avenger, just not as cool or mutated. Actually that means he's nothing like Toxie. RIP
Let us not give up the cause, Mayhem, but keep fighting the good fight! Slug.go's OP is down to two words per line, let us push it to singles!
Sorry I've missed this guys been catching up on sleep and emails. Many pissed of people I'm dealing with, but this epicness has helped relieve some stress. Thank you James Gordon
We all owe Fat Jimmy so much, he has helped us all by showing us how a true quitter should act.
Fat Jimmy is like the Incredible Hulk/Mormon we all knew when we were children.
If you scroll up and down real quick on the post string it is kind of psychedelic. Reminds me of climbing Mt. Fuji with Zillah cowboy in my younger days. Going for one word per line for Slug!!!!
I love, love, love, that this quote vortex was the first thing I saw after the two days of downtime.
Maybe he's Flash Gordon, here and gone in a flash!
Back to the top.
QLJG, E14D!
Everyone needs to breathe a deep sigh of relief, despite the heart palpitations caused by Bizarro World May Roll Call. I checked once, twice, fee-tines-a-mady (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOLH9QF-NnI (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOLH9QF-NnI)) and -- I'm not kidding, gents -- Fat Jimmy has not made an appearance since the new world order came into existence. By my rough math, he's on day 70 today (Tues the 15th). If we're men of our word, this quote vortex has at least 30 more days and potentially one more platform transfer before Fat Jimmy graces us with his third post as he saunters into the HOF. Fat Jimmy: like a boss.
...and the legend continues.
We mustn't give this up lest Fat Jimmy think we've stopped caring!
QLJG E14D
It brings a tear to my eye knowing how proud Fat Jimmy would be if he could see all the inspiration he has caused...
Have you ever been so far even as decided to use go want to look more like?
RickD... are you ok? Did you have a stroke when you wrote that comment?
I love the fact that most of slug's original post is now down to single words...
Yesterday would have been perfect. May 14 had 3 days of 100% posting followed by a week of double digit debauchery. Fat Jimminy G is crying in his cheerios.
My biggest fear is that Fat Jimmy posts roll, but this vortex is buried somewhere and he doesn't see it.
It's like a signal fire, we need to keep it burning at all times.
The new format may confuse him if he ever did come back.....but, back to the top any way :-)
I'm pretty sure that slug's OP is literally going to disappear haha. Fat Jimmy, one way or another we will make sure you see this.
Reading back through every single post in this vortex takes about 10 minutes.... well, at least once you're done hallucinating and your eyes stop bleeding, it does.
Hi guys, my name is James Gordon. I’m just an ordinary guy with some extraordinary gifts. I found KTC when I was Googling a place to get some decent fried chicken. Apparently I fat-fingered and missed the “F” in the middle. It’s too stinking close to the “T”. Anyhow, I was emotionally compelled by some of the stories of anguish, distress, and poor roll posting (or something like that)I found in the Mayhem Group. It resonated deeply within my soul. Even though I don’t dip, I wanted so badly to connect. Now I think I have found a home.
Like most of you, it has been a long, cold Winter here in Minneapolis. I guess it hasnÂ’t been that long, really, itÂ’s just that IÂ’ve never had the chance to play World of Warcraft in my parentsÂ’ basement between sessions of surfing barely-legal (maybe?) porn sites for eight months straight. By the way, if any of you know a schoolgirl that likes lollipops and ball gags, PM me. But thatÂ’s the only reason you should PM me.
I was born in 1974 to a middle-class family on the upper East side of the city. Dad works a respectable job at an automotive plant, mom is a den-mother for the girl scouts and bakes a lot. I like when she bakes and I get to see her all covered in flour, you know what I mean? Love you, mom!
Anyway, back to the whole “my extraordinary gifts” thing: I actually hold a couple of fancy degrees. First, I earned a B.S. in Math from Fraud University when I was just 17. I’m a proud FU alumni. There were some tough courses in that program, such as counting days. I figured out quickly that I wasn’t going to be an accountant. I also took one called “The Joke’s on you”, but I didn’t do so hot. So I changed majors again, switching to Physics. I actually figured out the secret to unlocking the whole space-time continuum thing. It’s cool because I can jack off while playing Call of Duty without having to pause the game. It also helps me pick out a brotherhood of “quitters” (you guys shouldn’t refer to yourselves in such a demeaning way) wherein I can post once every two weeks or so, while virtually fast-forwarding my quit just past the halfway point the HOF. I haven’t figured out what that acronym means exactly, but I’m pretty sure it stands for “Hegelonfinkelschneit”, which is German for “A secret brotherhood where we eventually get to build our own Angry Birds app using pictures of our naked, fat, pale selfies”. In any case, I’m in. I also majored in German, if you couldn’t tell.
So anyway, my parents have been on me since I was 22 to get my own place. I’m just not into it. I’m 40 and doing just fine on this couch. In fact, this couch has my morbidly obese frame perfectly imprinted on it with the corresponding outline of body grease. Or maybe it’s the baby lotion. Ah, it all runs together anyway. So when some of you guys say you’ve “fought the beast” for 18 years, I feel you on that. The beast to me is the overbearing father in my life that told me to get a job.
Another thing I’m pretty awesome at is dependability. That’s something I’ve long considered an attribute. Mom even let me guest-speak at the girl scout troop meeting once. Greatest day of my life (wink, wink). But I made them come downstairs. Mom was so annoying that day. She had like 80 yankee candles going. Not sure what that was about. So when people ask me if I’m the real thing, I’m just like, “Sure, I’m James Gordon”. And usually they don’t say much after that. But I know they know.
IÂ’m also good at following instructions and paying attention to detail. One of the dudes on your site, some Slug.go (OMG I hope thatÂ’s not his real name LOL) guy, told me something about roll. I shut my browser window real fast, which IÂ’m used to doing because mom spanks me when she catches me flogging the dolphin to lesbian scenes. Anyway, I went upstairs and asked mom to make me some rolls. We had the greatest flour fight ever. She doesnÂ’t know it, but I filed that memory in the spank tank for laterÂ…
So about the space-time continuum thing: It’s pretty cool that I’ve been a “quitter” (again, you guys shouldn’t be so hard on yourselves) for a couple of days. I’m putting this in my Intro because I’m not sure if some of the Veterans are keen enough to realize that my days are actually entire weeks for some of them. But I feel like maybe my time-warp skills are fading, because it feels like hours now between slap-the-ham sessions for me.
Some of you guys are talking about wives and kids and “quitting” for them. I’m not one to judge, but that may be a poor example for your offspring. I had a date once. Unfortunately, the cold Minnesota Winter locked up the internet connection and my Oovoo account froze up just like Lake Superior. Anyway, I’m not sure she was really a girl, but it doesn’t matter.
Whoever named me fat Jimmie sure hit the nail on the head. You guys are so smart (except that whole “quitting dip” thing). I personally won’t give up dip. You guys are missing out, IMHO. If you’ve never had a Ruffles potato chip delicately lathered in Ranch, you’re letting the best in life pass you by.
Anyway, I saw something about intros and decided I’d chime in. You guys may not hear from me until we cross the bridge into “Hegelonfinkelschneit” together, but that’s okay. It’s only one day in the life of James Gordon.
As for your website, I browsed it for a few minutes and figured out what KTC stands for. Kill the Can. I totally get it. Sometimes after a chicken and potato chip binge, I absolutely can do some of that action. Have any of you guys ever “roughed up the suspect” while sitting on the potty? You should try it!
So basically, thatÂ’s me. IÂ’m kind of like a fat Chuck Norris ninja-type with the ability to fast-forward time and not miss anything at all. And I was serious about that lollipop and ball-gag thing.
I can’t wait to Hegelonfinkelschneit with all of you. Especially Paul S. For being a serious “quitter” with such a sunny disposition, he seems like a decent enough guy for being from Kentucky. I’m pretty sure he’s probably like 6’3” and athletically built with a respectable job and a monster truck, but I’d kind of like him to hurl a nude Angry Bird Selfie at me.
Gotta run guys, momÂ’s making hot cross buns. They make a huge mess, and she gets on me for stomping when I want something because she says it messes up the dough. But it will get all over her, and she might even let me lick the spoon.
*Disclaimer: this is not intended to offend fried chicken fans, gamers, girl scouts, or residents of the Greater Twin Cities Metropolitan area.
Ladies and Gentleman- James Fucking Gordon.
Paul S, I'm a little pissed about this, because after Slug.go's suggestion of someone ghosting an intro for Fat Jim, I was envisioning a contest of sorts, with several people taking a shot at the Bio. I just don't see a lot of people being able to create this type of Gordon universe. This is why they usually put all of the good people at the end of the talent show.
2 words....fucking epic
First things first...that "intro" is hands down the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen on this website, it isn't even a competition. Second, if we can get that "intro" down to single words, we truly are immortal gods.
Funniest fucking Intro ever. I tip my hat to the author. Can't wait for the movie to come out.
Back to the top, some may have missed this. Wonder if we can get this to be a page long? Could take years...
I'm curious to see how many years it will take. Challenge accepted.
For all of you Gordo watchers. His two weeks appearance is due today. Keep your eyes peeled for him, and keep this string at the top (bottom). QLF E14D
I put the over under at 6.5 days for El Gordo to show up again? Whatcha got? I'm going to be optimistic and say UNDER
Now it's time to continue the challenge and see how long it takes for this fucker to be a full page. VORTEX CONTINUE!!
Since Gordo is in the room, wanted to make sure he saw how his legend began
Few ppl will ever have the ability to capture so much attention....back to the front if the room!
JG meta 1
Wow.. I guess I'm the talk of the quit group.. Sorry I haven't posted everyday.
I thought this was a support group not a place to bash the people that are going through the same issues that you are.
Maybe this site is not for me.. I didn't realize that you had to post everyday. Sorry I can't.
I have been busy and trying my best to forget about this crazy habit that I have had for WAY 2 long.
78 days.
'Popcorn'
A support group by it's very nature requires your presence in order to be supported.
Posting roll daily is pretty much the only bloody rule we have.
I don't really know where to go with that, except to say that if you think the way to get to where your going is by showing up once every two weeks then no this site is probably not for you. Good luck.
And then...poof....he's gone.
I am screaming with fucking laughter.
DWD and Sapp are right, there is now way that was really James Gordon.
That was even funnier than Paul S's intro thread.
He ends it with "78 Days". I am fucking pissing myself whether that was a mod playing a joke or whether it was really him. Either way, it is the highlight of my day!!!!!!!!!
Who knew that James Gordon had "622" after his name?
This whole time I thought he was just JamesGordon.
Was that really him? How will we know?
Hey Gordon- if that was really you, please go back and read the whole thread. You have to start two weeks ago.
I will keep bumping this message to the bottom of the list so that you can see it when you log back in in two weeks, so that you see my suggestion, but by then the OP will be 4 weeks old. You have a lot of reading ahead of you, and not a lot of time apparently.
In reality, I think it is just too big a coincidence that some of the vets just today started bitching about us talking too much about El Gordo, and also the day that the scriptures predicted his next return. Its just too neat.
JG meta 2
If it is a joke, it has had me fooled for a Gordon and a half.
I am now proceeding with the assumption that it was really a post by James Gordon, and not a joke.
If that is the case, it is a fascinating post.
How much of the James Gordon threads did he read before he posted that?
Did he do all the way back?
How did he not know you are supposed to post roll every day?
If he didn't know you were supposed to post roll, why does he post roll at all?
Did he really intend to come back every two weeks...er... I... mean every full Gordon?
What if we never started the Gordon threads, would he have just posted to the hall of fame?
Would we have let him?
Why does he pick Wednesdays? Is hump day usually his toughest day?
I could go on forever. And none of these questions will ever be answered.
Fat Jimmy is blowing my mind, again.
Thank you James Gordon.
I look forward to day 92 a full Gordon from now.
Man i don't give a damn what anybody says, newby, maybe, veteran, that is some funny shit right there.
Totally agree. My ghost bio pales in comparison to this hilarity. Prophetic.
Who knew that in the span of two international standard Gordon's this class would unite in solidarity behind the stalwart leadership of James mother fucking Gordon.
I'm proud to be quit on this Gordon and for every Gordon henceforward and hitherto.
No kidding bro, I was thinking the same thing. James Gordon united this class like nothing else had before. The official whipping boy of May 14, and we thank you.
James Gordon...May2014's Haley's comet. You can set your fucking watch to him.
JamesGordon622...6x2+2=14. QLF E14D. Holy shit, this is how crop circles are laid out, and Stonehenge. Time traveler (fix from slug.go)
Four Gordons and seven years ago...Gordo influenced Lincoln's Gettysburg address
Classic, now we are 'bump fixing' Gordon posts
They are all too precious. Can't afford to miss one.
Crop circles!!!! Just awesome!!!!
How does the spreadsheet get formatted to the Gordon scale?
I can do an extra column that converts your quit days into international standard Gordon's. I'll do it tonight.
Now THAT'S brotherhood!!!
Sapper, you've got too much time on your hands. I agree with you that it is a hoax. Read his last roll post before this. Day 64-feels like the first two weeks...I call hilarious bullshit.
Not really, and it doesn't take long anyway, but regardless, this is so epic, I'll make time to create a new unit of time measurement. My goal is to see it in widespread use in the future. Somebody needs to start a Wikipedia page about James Gordon and Gordon's as a unit of measurement.
So...7.14 Gordons gets one in the HOF?
Yes sir, your math is solid.
Actually, the true value of Gordons to HOF has 14 decimal places. Here I've calculated the exact value of the number of Gordon's to HOF. We'll refer to this value as HOG's (Hall of Gordon's).
7.14285714285714
I was really hoping for an indeterminate number, like Pi, but oh well.
JG meta 3
I really don't know what the fuck is the problem with alot of you..
Here I am trying by best to quit this fucking deadly habit that I have and trying to make it through just one day without thinking about quitting.
But I'm getting major shit about not being able to post every day.
Sorry that I don't have to time to sit and chat all day long on this site. I'm lucky to get on the computer once a week just to check my own email.
So NO I will not be able to post every day.
I'm glad most of you are getting a kick out of it.
To all the folks that have said positive things and have sent positive IM's I thank you.
This site has helped me a ton besides all the inmature posting that SOME of you have posted.
James- I found your post. Let me address your points one at a time.
1. We're addicts, that is one problem we all have in common.
2. You don't get the way quitting here works. The rest of us are not trying to make it through the day without thinking about quitting. That is not an effective strategy to quit. If there were kids setting your house on fire with a book of matches, would you close your eyes and plug your ears, and hope they would be gone when you opened them?
3. You don't have to chat, you just have to post roll. When you practice, I bet you can get it done in less than a minute. You don't have one fucking minute? What is your profession? You can only get on a computer once a week? Are you stuck in the gimp box the rest of the week?
4. If you can't post every day, you can reach out to someone via text to post for you. If you don't want to that, you can FUCK off.
5. You sound sarcastic, but yes, most of us are getting a kick out of it, thanks.
6. I'm happy that people said positive things to you in a PM, did you reply? Or were you out of time?
7. How has it helped you a ton? You obviously didn't read much on the site. You are not posting roll regularly. Do you have a secret core group of supporters that just remained silent the last few weeks?
If you think the site is helping you now, imagine how much it would help you if you were participating, instead of being (as far as I know) the most legendarily half-assed member in the history of the history of the site.
If you stop your whining, and think about how things are supposed to work around here, and then how you do them, maybe you will get your shit together. If you don't, why should we give a shit?
To the bottom. Lipi speaks the truth James.
Effing Lipi.... Love that shit!! 'Popcorn'
'Popcorn' is exactly right!!
JG meta 4
If anyone wants to compile the insane list of conspiracy theories, be my guest. I can only go so far down the rabbit hole before it start staring back at me...
Bump just because this monster is fucking hilarious.
The Gordon622 threads should have their own pinned topic on the site, and a dedicated moderator tasked with adding new content and tracking the appearances of JG.Does anyone have an explaination from Fat Jimmy yet as to why he only gets 2 minutes per week on the computer, or are we still going with "stuck in Gimp Box"?
My HOG date is 6/13/14. No longer interested in HOF.
I thought for a second I was having a stroke when I saw this.....
Gordon's Constant 7.14285714285714 'roflmao'
I just have to say, this has been an epic discussion...
I hope this epicness never dies.
Has he made an appearance lately. I mean has 1 IGU been completed yet? I'm jonesing.
edit: Paul S still has the best addition to this clusterfuck. Dat intro...
So he posted a full Gordon on day 78, next Gordo will be day 92. Biq question: does he break with Gordo cycle posting and post day 100...or wait until day 106? Vegas odds are 4:1 he posts day 100, then is never heard from again. Greatest trick the Gordo ever performed was making people think he didn't exist. Stay Gordo my friends.
I cannot wait to write his HOG speech...Epic, part deux. Stay Gordon indeed. I have a rough draft ready.
But to Lippi's point on the intro, a contest is probably in order. I'll write mine on HOG+1 non-ISG day. But here's a snippet:
"I'd like to thank mom and all my May brethren. Mostly mom, though. Mom, you have no idea how much help you've been. Thanks for always being there for me and resetting the wireless router everytime I stomp my feet and yell upstairs. For you May guys, thanks for being there every Gordon or so, and for using all those emoticons LOL. You guys really do crack me up. IMHO You should make one wearing an apron and flour-covered. Also, to my mom, thanks for washing those socks, even though you know they don't go on my feet. And thanks for using triple coupons on Brawny paper towels. I get backed up sometimes during marathon gaming sessions, and I hate when I take it out by Gordo-varnishing Grandma's old coffee table.
For all you guys that PM'ed me, I sort of appreciate it, but was expecting more of a schoolgirl/ball-gag hookup. Unless the goth thing was a joke, in which case I could make that work I guess. Same skirt, anyway. I know you guys advised me to post or to text you. I appreciate that. I'll definitely PM you back when I get to HOFx8 here in a few ISGs. The 622 isn't one to fly solo, as you all know by now.
To Ridiculous (sp?) I'm not sure what meta JG 1 means, but I think it's like that basketball player Meta World Peace, though I think he uses two "t's". You might have meant that and just spelled it wrong. It happens, man. Keep your chin up. I'll keep my chins up too. I've got like 5 LOL. Metta World Peace is a wierd name, but sounds bad-you-know-what (mom will yell at me if I type a$$). I think you all know what word I'm talking about."
Is there even a point in having the contest? Paul S, you are the ghost writer of Mayhem...just wouldn't seem right any other way...
622 bitches
Fuck the contest. Paul already won the contest. He truly understands the ways of Gordon.
Anyone remember this guy?
It's been so long.....where the fuck is JamesGordon????
It's only been like 2/3 of a Gordon. (rough math, obviously...Gordon's cannot be measured in fractions)
'Finger' 'Remshot' '40'
Fuck it, I'll take part in helping revive this beast.
He looks to have logged on Saturday, but no post.
He must be building anticipation. Or he caved during his 7th Gordon. I have heard that the 7th Gordon is especially tough on dudes attempting their fifth roll post.
Gordo's on day 97 today...Thursday will be watershed event of a magnitude never witnessed by mere mortals.
An Associated Press dispatch just announced that there will be a full vote of Congress on Thursday, May 15, 2014 to vote on a legislative act proclaiming that day a new national holiday. In one of the only instances of unified bipartisan support since the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, both houses of Congress are expected to bypass floor debate and go straight to a vote, with no opposition expected. Although the specific wording has yet to be finalized, May 15th is expected to be forever known as either "Fat Jimmy Day" or "The Day that JamesGordon Roared". Proposed Spanish translations are varied, but Hispanic communities are coalescing around "El dia del hombre con huevos de oro" which, loosely translated, means "The Day of the Man with Golden Balls". The White House is enthusiastically supporting the new proposed federal holiday, but would like to see Congress go further, suggesting that it would welcome the idea of all Thursdays hereafter referred to as Gordays.
That's.hilarious Krusty! I'm on pins and needles waiting for Thursday!
Holy hell... I gotta get in this... This is hilarious.. I just busted up laughing during a "boring" meeting at this shit... Boss is probably pissed, but I don't have to see him until the Gorday after next.
El dia del hombre con huevos de oro --- F'ing genious! That is my new battle cry in quit!
I can't wait to see Fat Jimmy's HOG speech courtesy of Paul S. I've been looking forward to it for Gordon's on end.
I've been tracking Fat Jimmy, and he was on-line again this morning, still no post.
What is happening Fat Jimmy? Why are you just observing us? Are you just waiting for Gordon 7.14, or are you afraid to admit you caved?
My prediction for his post tommorow.
"Despite not getting any support from SOME people on this site, posting here has helped me a lot. I thank those who have sent me a PM. sorry I couldn't respond. Time constraints. To the people who reached out to me with your digits, it meant the world. I hope I will never have to use any of them. To those that asked for my digits, I will get you them as soon as my cell phone works out here. To my support network, and you know who you are, thank you for standing up for me while everyone turned me into a group joke.
I made it!
James Gordon- Day 100"
This thread is so cool. I have to hold down the page down key for like 2 minutes to get to the end and it goes off the right side of the page. Can't even read slug's original post.
I am personally holding out hope for a post tomorrow since it is the Gordon of May. What will we do if he doesn't appear...for the love of god!
JG Meta 4!
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm afraid the worst news we could all fear is upon us. Our idol, nay, our demigod, the source of Gordonian physics and Gordesian coordinates has deemed us no longer worthy of his comradarie, and has removed himself now and forevermore from the rolls of May 2014.
James Gordon, if one day in the future, thou deem it within your will to join us again, even if only for a brief interlude, we will welcome your return almost as excitedly as the expected return of the Almighty! Please don't forget us as you spread your awesome quit karma across the known Gordiverse.
Does this mean its time to rework the header and rename the quit train?
Has El Gordo finally jumped the shark?
If he doesn't show up for Day 100, he has no value to me.
Maybe he will brighten up the August 2014 Roll Call with some sporadic and bizarre posts, become a source of intrigue, then become a source of great amusement, then become a laughing stock, then become annoying.
A sad day indeed. I shed a tear like the indian looking at the trash dump.
I'm old, and this reference is older than me.
LOL! I'm old too- and i remember it- but i think it's from the days when my parents could only afford a black and white tv, because i see it in black n white. I think it's from hippy days!
I don't understand...why isn't he here anymore?? How did he formally leave?? Please tell me this isn't true!
Okay, I must clarify, this was my assumption based on the fact that he lurks online but doesn't post roll with us anymore. He hasn't officially denounced us, but does it matter, he's done so by his actions. He has foresaken us in the moment of our greatest need.
Damnit Sap!
I have been existing on the illusion of JamesGordon622 for weeks now. Don't burst my bubble.
so you're telling me there's a chance I could still see ole Gordo post a 100?!?!?!?!?! What a fucking emotional roller coaster this Thursday has become!!!
I'm betting he has been drafting his HOF speech!!!
This has all come way too far for no HOF speech. If jg622 won't write it, I believe our resident ghost writer laureate has something prepared...
Paul S? Care to chime in?
Now we have one anonymous lurker... Could it be the illusive Fat Jimmy?
I'm here.. I didn't want to disappoint all of you.
Yes 100 days.. Still not easy but still off the can.
Made it through 10 days and Disney with the family and the first couple weeks of Turkey season.
No 100 day speech for me. I will write my speech in 900 more days
HE LIVES!
There is a god!
Congrats on the 100 days Gordo... Glad you stopped by!
No worries, JG622. Your HOF speech arrives in T minus 1.5 hours...
JamesGordon- I am looking forward to your 1000 day Speech. At that time you should have accumulated approximately 100 total posts, which, if you were the garden variety half-assed poster, would be the number you should have today. But you are far from the garden variety half-assed poster, we all know that by now. You are a whole new breed.
As always, I am completely stunned whenever I read something by El Gordo.
I'm not ready to talk about this one yet, but might have some close analysis later.
Paul, looking forward to your speech.
Congrats, JG! Now, how about posting roll with us?
Well, gentleman, here we are. Today, Fat Jimmie hits Hegelonfinkelshcneit with all his May brethren. Not all of them, really, just the ones with 7.14285714285714+ Gordons. Some of you aren’t there yet, but I won’t judge. I realize it’s been roughly 1.489352414127 Gordons since my last post, but I’ve logged on every few hours to make sure this secret society’s internet domain was still intact. Based on my original interpretation of Hegelonfinkelschneit, I expected to see the “Naked, Pasty-White Selfie Angry Birds” app on the Android marketplace. Maybe it’s only for Apple. I hate apples. But I’ll keep looking. Maybe you all are waiting on the “quitters” who haven’t hit as many Gordons as I have before you launch it. I sure hope it’s free to download.
Before I get to my words of gratitude, I really need to fill you “quitters” (LOL) in on the goings-on in the world of the “Hombre con Huevos de Oro.” (OMG Krusty that made me lmao). I don’t know how you guys know so much about me, but you’re amazing. Holding a degree in German, I obviously had to google it word-by-word to be sure, but as it turns out, I really do like it when mom scrambles my eggs to a nice golden color. I’d take a warm, sloppy mouthful of anybody’s yummy huevos EDD!!! LOL your acronyms…I’m pretty sure it means either “every damn day” or “explosive diarrhea discharge”. Either one makes contextual sense here, so I’ll refrain from further differentiation.
In other happenings, the “Nick beast” (That’s dad’s name, you guys just spell it wrong) finally made me apply for a job, so I did. That day was bad from the start, and I had a nice can of dip (sour cream and onion) and a bag of Ruffles to calm my nerves. First, I had to shower, which is not on my list of favorite things. After a thorough scrubbing of the portions of my undercarriage which were reachable (I used mom’s loofa scrubbie, btw. It smelled SOOOO good so I sniffed it for like an hour), I rinsed off and realized that removing all that caked-up baby oil created a significant amount of dry skin. And I had to stand there for awhile because my Gordo-pubes were clogging the drain. What a crappy drain. Mom knew I was stressed, so she lathered me back up with lotion. All I can say is that slapping the ham to that episode was the closest thing to real violence I will likely ever experience. So on my way to the place I was applying, I got pulled over in mom’s Oldsmobile. Apparently it isn’t okay to drive 5.327143989519385 Gordons per hour in a 2.587238502932 zone. I told the guy it was only like a Gordon and a half over, but he made a big deal of it. What a jerk. It might have been that RickDiculous character that jumps on our site every now and then. My reflection in his Ray-Bans made my mom’s Oldsmobile look skinny. Weird!
So I finally got to the Tire Lube place I was applying to (not real big on tires, but HUGE on lube) and went in to apply. They asked if I had any experience in automotive, and I proceeded to tell the manager on duty that I was a world-class bad-ass in Grand Theft Auto: Las Vegas. He thought it was funny, so I kept on with the jokes. After about 10 minutes, he totally quit laughing and called the police. Same jerk with the sunglasses showed up and told me to leave. I haven’t yet heard back to see if I got the job, though I’m optimistic. Must be a lot of interviews still to do—that’s my guess anyway. As you all are totally aware, I’m normally really good at reading between the lines.
So on the way home, I just flat out Killed the Can. As it turns out, Ruffles don’t have Ridges post-colon. Write that one down. Fact. The problem was that I was still in Mom’s Oldsmobile. So I pulled into a K-Mart parking lot, took her license plate off and left the car where it sat. I was almost home, so it was no biggie. It’s been a cold Spring in “Minnie” so I was glad to have the extra warmth as I hoofed it for about a half-mile. Mom was soooo mad. But that’s okay. She spanked me pretty thoroughly, so I turned around and thoroughly spanked it again if you know what I mean.
So in retrospect, that partial-Gordon wasn’t so bad. I had two “Flog-the-dolphin” sessions before lunch. Check-mate.
And now for a few expressions of gratitude from “Fat Jimmie”. This site has empowered me to embrace my inner-Jimmie and even speak occasionally in third-person.
I'd like to thank mom and all my May brethren. Mostly mom, though. Mom, you have no idea how much help you've been. Thanks for always being there for me and resetting the wireless router everytime I stomp my feet and yell upstairs. For you MayHAM (yum) guys, thanks for being there every Gordon or so, and for using all those emoticons LOL. You guys really do crack me up. IMHO You should make one wearing an apron and flour-covered. Also, to my mom, thanks for washing those socks, even though you know they don't go on my feet. And thanks for using triple coupons on Brawny paper towels. I get backed up sometimes during marathon gaming sessions, and I hate when I take it out by Gordo-varnishing Grandma's old coffee table you let me keep down here in the basement. Mom, I also appreciate when you come downstairs and change the lightbulb. You know I like it dark down here, but seeing your midriff when you stand on that Little Giant and reach is automatic spank-tank material.
Thanks to those of you who PM’ed me and offered to post roll or something like that. Sounds like some B.S. administrative tasks meant to suppress the brotherhood of this site, so I don’t want us to get caught up in those kinds of details. I’m glad I didn’t have to go through this journey alone. I “Quit” with each and every one of you—within reason, of course; I’m not one to overcommit.
And thank you to RickDiculous and Pinched (before you changed it) for your Avatars. Dang. You guys must be total chick magnets.
I feel like my Intro speech was a little vague on a few points, so let me take a stab at clarifying them. A couple of you have asked me where the 622 suffix came from. I’m 40 now. That number actually has a triple-meaning in my life. First and foremost, it’s my weight in Gordo-grams. (1Kg = 2.6 Gg). I prefer to use the metric system as the baseline calculation because it allows me to feel a little better about my endowment in specific anatomical regions than do the measurements by standard units. Secondly, if you divide 622 by 1 Standard Gordon, you get roughly 87. That’s the number of non-Gordon days I went in a row once without eating a vegetable. Huge accomplishment followed closely thereafter by a huge bowel movement. Kill the Can, says I. 622 also happens to be the number of 1-on-1 Warcraft victories I had when I joined your site, which was about 3.5 Gordons or so ago now. I’ll never forget that day. Even as I made my first post, I remember wondering how anybody would keep up with my high level of commitment. It looks like only a dozen or so of you could. The rest of you guys aren’t even at this mark yet. Hang in there, though. Keep your chins up and keep on “quitting”. 622 is also my personal record for the number of times I “Dated Miss Michigan” in a single Standard Gordon. Thank GOD mom is a Mary Kay rep. Their replenishing cream works wonders on a guy that likes to “Shoot for the socks” with the frequency I do.
I’d continue writing for another 7/16ths of a Gordon, but I don’t want to cramp up my hands because I can hear the girl scout troop meeting upstairs and I know these palms will get a workout thinking about that later. I’ll continue to check in with you fine quitters every Gordon or so. Stay vigilant, my dear anonymous friends. Please do not fret if I make assertions about a 10-day trip to Disney (because people really do go to Disney for that amount of time…they’re called seasonal workers) or occasionally write in BOLD LETTERS or ALL CAPS. That’s just some pent-up frustrations because I can’t “badger the witness” when mom’s friends are over. My greasiest, pube-laden, mom-smelling Gordo-hugs to each of you.
In closing, I’d like to convey my emotions by mis-quoting King Leonidas’ Character in the Movie ‘300’. “Tonight, we dine in mom’s basement and Gordo-varnish a sock in honor of the Snowflakes. Especially Paul S…So Hot.”
Damn, that's funny...
"that's fucking hilarious. I damn near pissed myself" -slug.go
I'm in tears. I love Mayhem.
Doc Chewfree! I told you it was gordograms! Exclamation points!!!!
Here you go, Lipi.
Some sort of parallel Gortex happening in here......
The actual Gordon posts in here are the really amazing part. It's like shaking hands with David Koresh or Jim Jones.
Its amazing how 1 HAQS sufferer can strengthen 58 quitters' quits so much. Since you own post 1 of all things Gordantastic, I'm so glad you were able to capture it!!!!!
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I was hanging out in chat the other night and heard some guys talking about Smokey Mountain. I have been using Hooch exclusively for the past couple of months. I started thinking about the spit quality of Smokey Mtn (much better than Hooch in my opinion). I had to go to Wal-Mart and get a can of that SM. I took a couple dips of it. The second of which was as I was walking onto the baseball field. It may be coincidence, but the gas pains started. I was able to squeak several low decibel air destroyers out as we approached home plate. My partner, clueless to my horrible fart session, stood behind the plate and I in front of it waiting for the coaches to come for the pregame conference. That is when I felt it. A gas bubble that took the whole left side of my stomach started to make a break for the exit. I had a suspicion that this ass-plosion was not going to be quiet or undetectable. As we concluded our conference and were exchanging hand shakes and "good lucks" (by the way, why the fuck do I need luck?? I"m the umpire. Everything that is about to happen will be judged by me and the end result will be what I say it was. There is no luck in that for me....yet I digress) the nasty fucking gas bubble made a mad dash for the exit. The toot started with an innocent, small squeaking sound. It escalated quickly. There might as well been a bull horn to my ass. There wasn't an ear that didn't hear it. The smell of rotting meat mixed with fermented eggs and 2 parts asshole immediately saturated the area around the plate. The coaches quickly made their exit. Usually, basking in my own scent isn't that bad, this was the exception. Since I was working the bases, I made a break for right field. I watched my partner pace back and forth during player introductions. He was trying to take a breath of air that wasn't tainted by my foulness and couldn't find any. As I was laughing my ass off in right field, I thought of your legendary fart story.
So, do you think SM is responsible for our putrid gas expulsions?
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I was hanging out in chat the other night and heard some guys talking about Smokey Mountain. I have been using Hooch exclusively for the past couple of months. I started thinking about the spit quality of Smokey Mtn (much better than Hooch in my opinion). I had to go to Wal-Mart and get a can of that SM. I took a couple dips of it. The second of which was as I was walking onto the baseball field. It may be coincidence, but the gas pains started. I was able to squeak several low decibel air destroyers out as we approached home plate. My partner, clueless to my horrible fart session, stood behind the plate and I in front of it waiting for the coaches to come for the pregame conference. That is when I felt it. A gas bubble that took the whole left side of my stomach started to make a break for the exit. I had a suspicion that this ass-plosion was not going to be quiet or undetectable. As we concluded our conference and were exchanging hand shakes and "good lucks" (by the way, why the fuck do I need luck?? I"m the umpire. Everything that is about to happen will be judged by me and the end result will be what I say it was. There is no luck in that for me....yet I digress) the nasty fucking gas bubble made a mad dash for the exit. The toot started with an innocent, small squeaking sound. It escalated quickly. There might as well been a bull horn to my ass. There wasn't an ear that didn't hear it. The smell of rotting meat mixed with fermented eggs and 2 parts asshole immediately saturated the area around the plate. The coaches quickly made their exit. Usually, basking in my own scent isn't that bad, this was the exception. Since I was working the bases, I made a break for right field. I watched my partner pace back and forth during player introductions. He was trying to take a breath of air that wasn't tainted by my foulness and couldn't find any. As I was laughing my ass off in right field, I thought of your legendary fart story.
So, do you think SM is responsible for our putrid gas expulsions?
Damn, that's funny...just saw it today!
Break...
Just heard something apropos to all of us.
A bad habit is easy to form but hard to live with. A good habit is hard to form but easy to live with.
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I was hanging out in chat the other night and heard some guys talking about Smokey Mountain. I have been using Hooch exclusively for the past couple of months. I started thinking about the spit quality of Smokey Mtn (much better than Hooch in my opinion). I had to go to Wal-Mart and get a can of that SM. I took a couple dips of it. The second of which was as I was walking onto the baseball field. It may be coincidence, but the gas pains started. I was able to squeak several low decibel air destroyers out as we approached home plate. My partner, clueless to my horrible fart session, stood behind the plate and I in front of it waiting for the coaches to come for the pregame conference. That is when I felt it. A gas bubble that took the whole left side of my stomach started to make a break for the exit. I had a suspicion that this ass-plosion was not going to be quiet or undetectable. As we concluded our conference and were exchanging hand shakes and "good lucks" (by the way, why the fuck do I need luck?? I"m the umpire. Everything that is about to happen will be judged by me and the end result will be what I say it was. There is no luck in that for me....yet I digress) the nasty fucking gas bubble made a mad dash for the exit. The toot started with an innocent, small squeaking sound. It escalated quickly. There might as well been a bull horn to my ass. There wasn't an ear that didn't hear it. The smell of rotting meat mixed with fermented eggs and 2 parts asshole immediately saturated the area around the plate. The coaches quickly made their exit. Usually, basking in my own scent isn't that bad, this was the exception. Since I was working the bases, I made a break for right field. I watched my partner pace back and forth during player introductions. He was trying to take a breath of air that wasn't tainted by my foulness and couldn't find any. As I was laughing my ass off in right field, I thought of your legendary fart story.
So, do you think SM is responsible for our putrid gas expulsions?
Damn, that's funny...just saw it today!
Break...
Just heard something apropos to all of us.
A bad habit is easy to form but hard to live with. A good habit is hard to form but easy to live with.
Apropos? Damon slug.go I had to look that up. After further research, I agree! Cool saying!
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Ol slugo, there u are u sack of shit.. I don't appreciate u coming to my boxes and intro and shitting on me u terd.. U better apologize like a mature man dude. Ill be waiting u dude are not amazing your the cum bubble of cum bubbles u v
Cum bubble mother fucker
Bob
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Time to sleep on this boys. No more threats, and no more accusations unless you have proof. If all else fails, go into your profile and hit "ignore user"
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U MR.!!!! Are stabbing me in my gut. This is how u do it around here?? I know 12 year old Xbox mature kids who treat a stranger with more respect and divinity and honor and class u MR. Sluggish are a disrespect and embarrassment to man kind. You are a pathetic excuse of a non awesome dude. Not even a man. My dog would treat u with more humanity u sorry excuse of a man. I know your not the face of this web site u are wrong that is not how everyone rolls. You and a few others are the only cancer I noticed in the countless hours I have spent on this website. This is serious stuff and to think you piss on me before u even know me says evrything of what kind of Man U are. I'm happy if your quit but diss appointed u or anyone in your family or friends view u as a man. I never knew a stranger could make me want to slice my throat yesterday being a loser in life due to my disabilities to then come to get advice and give it u met me to destroy my soul. But I speak to my doctor and I thank Iam stronger then this I just thought this web site was so much more then non awesome people like u MR.
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U MR.!!!! Are stabbing me in my gut. This is how u do it around here?? I know 12 year old Xbox mature kids who treat a stranger with more respect and divinity and honor and class u MR. Sluggish are a disrespect and embarrassment to man kind. You are a pathetic excuse of a non awesome dude. Not even a man. My dog would treat u with more humanity u sorry excuse of a man. I know your not the face of this web site u are wrong that is not how everyone rolls. You and a few others are the only cancer I noticed in the countless hours I have spent on this website. This is serious stuff and to think you piss on me before u even know me says evrything of what kind of Man U are. I'm happy if your quit but diss appointed u or anyone in your family or friends view u as a man. I never knew a stranger could make me want to slice my throat yesterday being a loser in life due to my disabilities to then come to get advice and give it u met me to destroy my soul. But I speak to my doctor and I thank Iam stronger then this I just thought this web site was so much more then non awesome people like u MR.
this is ridiculous..
30 told you to knock it off.. there's hardly a finer quitter here than Slug, you would do yourself a favor to read what he writes, and follow in the example that he leads..
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+1 with sluggo. all day every day.
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I quit with sluggo EDD, all day long.
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U MR.!!!! Are stabbing me in my gut. This is how u do it around here?? I know 12 year old Xbox mature kids who treat a stranger with more respect and divinity and honor and class u MR. Sluggish are a disrespect and embarrassment to man kind. You are a pathetic excuse of a non awesome dude. Not even a man. My dog would treat u with more humanity u sorry excuse of a man. I know your not the face of this web site u are wrong that is not how everyone rolls. You and a few others are the only cancer I noticed in the countless hours I have spent on this website. This is serious stuff and to think you piss on me before u even know me says evrything of what kind of Man U are. I'm happy if your quit but diss appointed u or anyone in your family or friends view u as a man. I never knew a stranger could make me want to slice my throat yesterday being a loser in life due to my disabilities to then come to get advice and give it u met me to destroy my soul. But I speak to my doctor and I thank Iam stronger then this I just thought this web site was so much more then non awesome people like u MR.
this is ridiculous..
30 told you to knock it off.. there's hardly a finer quitter here than Slug, you would do yourself a favor to read what he writes, and follow in the example that he leads..
You mr.are clueless. I read what he writes on my intro and other comments and writes. And u should read em too.
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U MR.!!!! Are stabbing me in my gut. This is how u do it around here?? I know 12 year old Xbox mature kids who treat a stranger with more respect and divinity and honor and class u MR. Sluggish are a disrespect and embarrassment to man kind. You are a pathetic excuse of a non awesome dude. Not even a man. My dog would treat u with more humanity u sorry excuse of a man. I know your not the face of this web site u are wrong that is not how everyone rolls. You and a few others are the only cancer I noticed in the countless hours I have spent on this website. This is serious stuff and to think you piss on me before u even know me says evrything of what kind of Man U are. I'm happy if your quit but diss appointed u or anyone in your family or friends view u as a man. I never knew a stranger could make me want to slice my throat yesterday being a loser in life due to my disabilities to then come to get advice and give it u met me to destroy my soul. But I speak to my doctor and I thank Iam stronger then this I just thought this web site was so much more then non awesome people like u MR.
this is ridiculous..
30 told you to knock it off.. there's hardly a finer quitter here than Slug, you would do yourself a favor to read what he writes, and follow in the example that he leads..
You mr.are clueless. I read what he writes on my intro and other comments and writes. And u should read em too.
First. Sorry to Slug for posting this in your intro.
I read those comments. I think you're a dumb ass also.
So you got offended because of something he said and now you're still crying about it? Get over it. You plan on chasing down every person on the highway that flips you off and demand their respect and tell them to man the fuck up and apologize or fight you? Oh no. That's right you're just going to call them a cancer and a cum bubble.
Welcome to KTC. It's too bad it's a kinder and gentler place because 2 years ago you would have gotten shit on by multiple people for posting the kind of nonsense you've graced us with these past 2 days.
Posting here is a privilege not a right. No one here owes you anything. Nor me for that matter. Maybe I'll lose my privileges with this post but I'll still be +1 tomorrow with someone other than you.
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U MR.!!!! Are stabbing me in my gut. This is how u do it around here?? I know 12 year old Xbox mature kids who treat a stranger with more respect and divinity and honor and class u MR. Sluggish are a disrespect and embarrassment to man kind. You are a pathetic excuse of a non awesome dude. Not even a man. My dog would treat u with more humanity u sorry excuse of a man. I know your not the face of this web site u are wrong that is not how everyone rolls. You and a few others are the only cancer I noticed in the countless hours I have spent on this website. This is serious stuff and to think you piss on me before u even know me says evrything of what kind of Man U are. I'm happy if your quit but diss appointed u or anyone in your family or friends view u as a man. I never knew a stranger could make me want to slice my throat yesterday being a loser in life due to my disabilities to then come to get advice and give it u met me to destroy my soul. But I speak to my doctor and I thank Iam stronger then this I just thought this web site was so much more then non awesome people like u MR.
this is ridiculous..
30 told you to knock it off.. there's hardly a finer quitter here than Slug, you would do yourself a favor to read what he writes, and follow in the example that he leads..
You mr.are clueless. I read what he writes on my intro and other comments and writes. And u should read em too.
First. Sorry to Slug for posting this in your intro.
I read those comments. I think you're a dumb ass also.
So you got offended because of something he said and now you're still crying about it? Get over it. You plan on chasing down every person on the highway that flips you off and demand their respect and tell them to man the fuck up and apologize or fight you? Oh no. That's right you're just going to call them a cancer and a cum bubble.
Welcome to KTC. It's too bad it's a kinder and gentler place because 2 years ago you would have gotten shit on by multiple people for posting the kind of nonsense you've graced us with these past 2 days.
Posting here is a privilege not a right. No one here owes you anything. Nor me for that matter. Maybe I'll lose my privileges with this post but I'll still be +1 tomorrow with someone other than you.
Yep, I'd say p23 about nailed it. I'll stand shoulder to shoulder with him, MN_Ben, and Thumble all day long in Slug's intro.
Bobby Cum Bubbles, whoever he is, can pound sand. Otherwise shut the fuck up and start posting roll with some consistency to be taken seriously -- for someone who claims to have spent "countless hours" reading up on the site, different people's posts, reputations, etc., he seems more enchanted by the prospect of finding someone with whom to kill online zombies.
This pains me to no end, but the absurdity of the situation warrants that I pop my own cherry: 'zombie'
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U MR.!!!! Are stabbing me in my gut. This is how u do it around here?? I know 12 year old Xbox mature kids who treat a stranger with more respect and divinity and honor and class u MR. Sluggish are a disrespect and embarrassment to man kind. You are a pathetic excuse of a non awesome dude. Not even a man. My dog would treat u with more humanity u sorry excuse of a man. I know your not the face of this web site u are wrong that is not how everyone rolls. You and a few others are the only cancer I noticed in the countless hours I have spent on this website. This is serious stuff and to think you piss on me before u even know me says evrything of what kind of Man U are. I'm happy if your quit but diss appointed u or anyone in your family or friends view u as a man. I never knew a stranger could make me want to slice my throat yesterday being a loser in life due to my disabilities to then come to get advice and give it u met me to destroy my soul. But I speak to my doctor and I thank Iam stronger then this I just thought this web site was so much more then non awesome people like u MR.
this is ridiculous..
30 told you to knock it off.. there's hardly a finer quitter here than Slug, you would do yourself a favor to read what he writes, and follow in the example that he leads..
You mr.are clueless. I read what he writes on my intro and other comments and writes. And u should read em too.
First. Sorry to Slug for posting this in your intro.
I read those comments. I think you're a dumb ass also.
So you got offended because of something he said and now you're still crying about it? Get over it. You plan on chasing down every person on the highway that flips you off and demand their respect and tell them to man the fuck up and apologize or fight you? Oh no. That's right you're just going to call them a cancer and a cum bubble.
Welcome to KTC. It's too bad it's a kinder and gentler place because 2 years ago you would have gotten shit on by multiple people for posting the kind of nonsense you've graced us with these past 2 days.
Posting here is a privilege not a right. No one here owes you anything. Nor me for that matter. Maybe I'll lose my privileges with this post but I'll still be +1 tomorrow with someone other than you.
Yep, I'd say p23 about nailed it. I'll stand shoulder to shoulder with him, MN_Ben, and Thumble all day long in Slug's intro.
Bobby Cum Bubbles, whoever he is, can pound sand. Otherwise shut the fuck up and start posting roll with some consistency to be taken seriously -- for someone who claims to have spent "countless hours" reading up on the site, different people's posts, reputations, etc., he seems more enchanted by the prospect of finding someone with whom to kill online zombies.
This pains me to no end, but the absurdity of the situation warrants that I pop my own cherry: 'zombie'
Bobby you need to back off. You need to just quit and stop talking because the more of your thoughts I read the less I think of you. slug may not have given you the benefit of the doubt, but your intro is pretty odd. People on this site came here to fight for their lives against the most addictive drug on the planet, and most of us went through the hell of early quit right here together. You come into KTC after your hellish days are in your past and choose a screen-name that seems to romanticize the poison... You talk about playing x-box all day and not having a job. You claim to be reading KTC but you are not acting like it. Anyone with any sense is going to question your sincerity with regards to your quit and involvement here. If you want support with your quit from people here, then drop your butt-hurt and start focusing on quitting.
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U MR.!!!! Are stabbing me in my gut. This is how u do it around here?? I know 12 year old Xbox mature kids who treat a stranger with more respect and divinity and honor and class u MR. Sluggish are a disrespect and embarrassment to man kind. You are a pathetic excuse of a non awesome dude. Not even a man. My dog would treat u with more humanity u sorry excuse of a man. I know your not the face of this web site u are wrong that is not how everyone rolls. You and a few others are the only cancer I noticed in the countless hours I have spent on this website. This is serious stuff and to think you piss on me before u even know me says evrything of what kind of Man U are. I'm happy if your quit but diss appointed u or anyone in your family or friends view u as a man. I never knew a stranger could make me want to slice my throat yesterday being a loser in life due to my disabilities to then come to get advice and give it u met me to destroy my soul. But I speak to my doctor and I thank Iam stronger then this I just thought this web site was so much more then non awesome people like u MR.
this is ridiculous..
30 told you to knock it off.. there's hardly a finer quitter here than Slug, you would do yourself a favor to read what he writes, and follow in the example that he leads..
You mr.are clueless. I read what he writes on my intro and other comments and writes. And u should read em too.
First. Sorry to Slug for posting this in your intro.
I read those comments. I think you're a dumb ass also.
So you got offended because of something he said and now you're still crying about it? Get over it. You plan on chasing down every person on the highway that flips you off and demand their respect and tell them to man the fuck up and apologize or fight you? Oh no. That's right you're just going to call them a cancer and a cum bubble.
Welcome to KTC. It's too bad it's a kinder and gentler place because 2 years ago you would have gotten shit on by multiple people for posting the kind of nonsense you've graced us with these past 2 days.
Posting here is a privilege not a right. No one here owes you anything. Nor me for that matter. Maybe I'll lose my privileges with this post but I'll still be +1 tomorrow with someone other than you.
Yep, I'd say p23 about nailed it. I'll stand shoulder to shoulder with him, MN_Ben, and Thumble all day long in Slug's intro.
Bobby Cum Bubbles, whoever he is, can pound sand. Otherwise shut the fuck up and start posting roll with some consistency to be taken seriously -- for someone who claims to have spent "countless hours" reading up on the site, different people's posts, reputations, etc., he seems more enchanted by the prospect of finding someone with whom to kill online zombies.
This pains me to no end, but the absurdity of the situation warrants that I pop my own cherry: 'zombie'
Bobby you need to back off. You need to just quit and stop talking because the more of your thoughts I read the less I think of you. slug may not have given you the benefit of the doubt, but your intro is pretty odd. People on this site came here to fight for their lives against the most addictive drug on the planet, and most of us went through the hell of early quit right here together. You come into KTC after your hellish days are in your past and choose a screen-name that seems to romanticize the poison... You talk about playing x-box all day and not having a job. You claim to be reading KTC but you are not acting like it. Anyone with any sense is going to question your sincerity with regards to your quit and involvement here. If you want support with your quit from people here, then drop your butt-hurt and start focusing on quitting.
Enough of even mentioning this bobby dude in this thread... my prediction is he vanishes like a fart in the breeze..
Slug.go is a bad ass and its annoying that this is even in his intro.. I wish I was half as bad ass as Slug.go.. I imagine every time he walks into a bar Kenny Loggins danger zone starts playing and all the women stop whatever they were doing and start whispering to each other about the bad ass quitter that just appeared in their midst..
-
U MR.!!!! Are stabbing me in my gut. This is how u do it around here?? I know 12 year old Xbox mature kids who treat a stranger with more respect and divinity and honor and class u MR. Sluggish are a disrespect and embarrassment to man kind. You are a pathetic excuse of a non awesome dude. Not even a man. My dog would treat u with more humanity u sorry excuse of a man. I know your not the face of this web site u are wrong that is not how everyone rolls. You and a few others are the only cancer I noticed in the countless hours I have spent on this website. This is serious stuff and to think you piss on me before u even know me says evrything of what kind of Man U are. I'm happy if your quit but diss appointed u or anyone in your family or friends view u as a man. I never knew a stranger could make me want to slice my throat yesterday being a loser in life due to my disabilities to then come to get advice and give it u met me to destroy my soul. But I speak to my doctor and I thank Iam stronger then this I just thought this web site was so much more then non awesome people like u MR.
this is ridiculous..
30 told you to knock it off.. there's hardly a finer quitter here than Slug, you would do yourself a favor to read what he writes, and follow in the example that he leads..
You mr.are clueless. I read what he writes on my intro and other comments and writes. And u should read em too.
First. Sorry to Slug for posting this in your intro.
I read those comments. I think you're a dumb ass also.
So you got offended because of something he said and now you're still crying about it? Get over it. You plan on chasing down every person on the highway that flips you off and demand their respect and tell them to man the fuck up and apologize or fight you? Oh no. That's right you're just going to call them a cancer and a cum bubble.
Welcome to KTC. It's too bad it's a kinder and gentler place because 2 years ago you would have gotten shit on by multiple people for posting the kind of nonsense you've graced us with these past 2 days.
Posting here is a privilege not a right. No one here owes you anything. Nor me for that matter. Maybe I'll lose my privileges with this post but I'll still be +1 tomorrow with someone other than you.
Yep, I'd say p23 about nailed it. I'll stand shoulder to shoulder with him, MN_Ben, and Thumble all day long in Slug's intro.
Bobby Cum Bubbles, whoever he is, can pound sand. Otherwise shut the fuck up and start posting roll with some consistency to be taken seriously -- for someone who claims to have spent "countless hours" reading up on the site, different people's posts, reputations, etc., he seems more enchanted by the prospect of finding someone with whom to kill online zombies.
This pains me to no end, but the absurdity of the situation warrants that I pop my own cherry: 'zombie'
Bobby you need to back off. You need to just quit and stop talking because the more of your thoughts I read the less I think of you. slug may not have given you the benefit of the doubt, but your intro is pretty odd. People on this site came here to fight for their lives against the most addictive drug on the planet, and most of us went through the hell of early quit right here together. You come into KTC after your hellish days are in your past and choose a screen-name that seems to romanticize the poison... You talk about playing x-box all day and not having a job. You claim to be reading KTC but you are not acting like it. Anyone with any sense is going to question your sincerity with regards to your quit and involvement here. If you want support with your quit from people here, then drop your butt-hurt and start focusing on quitting.
Enough of even mentioning this bobby dude in this thread... my prediction is he vanishes like a fart in the breeze..
Slug.go is a bad ass and its annoying that this is even in his intro.. I wish I was half as bad ass as Slug.go.. I imagine every time he walks into a bar Kenny Loggins danger zone starts playing and all the women stop whatever they were doing and start whispering to each other about the bad ass quitter that just appeared in their midst..
Let's just get back to quitting and let the cards fall where they may. I won't let any of the quitters here down, certainly not today. Tackle tomorrow when it gets here. Thanks for the support, now back to your regularly scheduled quit.
-
U MR.!!!! Are stabbing me in my gut. This is how u do it around here?? I know 12 year old Xbox mature kids who treat a stranger with more respect and divinity and honor and class u MR. Sluggish are a disrespect and embarrassment to man kind. You are a pathetic excuse of a non awesome dude. Not even a man. My dog would treat u with more humanity u sorry excuse of a man. I know your not the face of this web site u are wrong that is not how everyone rolls. You and a few others are the only cancer I noticed in the countless hours I have spent on this website. This is serious stuff and to think you piss on me before u even know me says evrything of what kind of Man U are. I'm happy if your quit but diss appointed u or anyone in your family or friends view u as a man. I never knew a stranger could make me want to slice my throat yesterday being a loser in life due to my disabilities to then come to get advice and give it u met me to destroy my soul. But I speak to my doctor and I thank Iam stronger then this I just thought this web site was so much more then non awesome people like u MR.
this is ridiculous..
30 told you to knock it off.. there's hardly a finer quitter here than Slug, you would do yourself a favor to read what he writes, and follow in the example that he leads..
You mr.are clueless. I read what he writes on my intro and other comments and writes. And u should read em too.
First. Sorry to Slug for posting this in your intro.
I read those comments. I think you're a dumb ass also.
So you got offended because of something he said and now you're still crying about it? Get over it. You plan on chasing down every person on the highway that flips you off and demand their respect and tell them to man the fuck up and apologize or fight you? Oh no. That's right you're just going to call them a cancer and a cum bubble.
Welcome to KTC. It's too bad it's a kinder and gentler place because 2 years ago you would have gotten shit on by multiple people for posting the kind of nonsense you've graced us with these past 2 days.
Posting here is a privilege not a right. No one here owes you anything. Nor me for that matter. Maybe I'll lose my privileges with this post but I'll still be +1 tomorrow with someone other than you.
Yep, I'd say p23 about nailed it. I'll stand shoulder to shoulder with him, MN_Ben, and Thumble all day long in Slug's intro.
Bobby Cum Bubbles, whoever he is, can pound sand. Otherwise shut the fuck up and start posting roll with some consistency to be taken seriously -- for someone who claims to have spent "countless hours" reading up on the site, different people's posts, reputations, etc., he seems more enchanted by the prospect of finding someone with whom to kill online zombies.
This pains me to no end, but the absurdity of the situation warrants that I pop my own cherry: 'zombie'
Bobby you need to back off. You need to just quit and stop talking because the more of your thoughts I read the less I think of you. slug may not have given you the benefit of the doubt, but your intro is pretty odd. People on this site came here to fight for their lives against the most addictive drug on the planet, and most of us went through the hell of early quit right here together. You come into KTC after your hellish days are in your past and choose a screen-name that seems to romanticize the poison... You talk about playing x-box all day and not having a job. You claim to be reading KTC but you are not acting like it. Anyone with any sense is going to question your sincerity with regards to your quit and involvement here. If you want support with your quit from people here, then drop your butt-hurt and start focusing on quitting.
Enough of even mentioning this bobby dude in this thread... my prediction is he vanishes like a fart in the breeze..
Slug.go is a bad ass and its annoying that this is even in his intro.. I wish I was half as bad ass as Slug.go.. I imagine every time he walks into a bar Kenny Loggins danger zone starts playing and all the women stop whatever they were doing and start whispering to each other about the bad ass quitter that just appeared in their midst..
Let's just get back to quitting and let the cards fall where they may. I won't let any of the quitters here down, certainly not today. Tackle tomorrow when it gets here. Thanks for the support, now back to your regularly scheduled quit.
Thanks slug dude.
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I quit with you today slug.go.
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I quit with you today slug.go.
On the bright side, at least you're not an aids quilt...
Quit with you today man.
-
I sure appreciate it guys, now let's go find some one who is struggling and get behind them.
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I sure appreciate it guys, now let's go find some one who is struggling and get behind them.
:wub:
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For the record, 30 Year Addict and I have exchanged a few PM's and there is no, nor has there ever been any animosity between us. Back to quitting. It's what we all do best.
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For the record, 30 Year Addict and I have exchanged a few PM's and there is no, nor has there ever been any animosity between us. Back to quitting. It's what we all do best.
you are a class act, my friend. quit with you today.
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For the record, 30 Year Addict and I have exchanged a few PM's and there is no, nor has there ever been any animosity between us. Back to quitting. It's what we all do best.
you are a class act, my friend. quit with you today.
Nice!
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Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
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Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
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Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
Well done slug.go!!!
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
Well done slug.go!!!
From step one you've built a solid quit-- great job, congrats, and thanks!
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
Well done slug.go!!!
From step one you've built a solid quit-- great job, congrats, and thanks!
Congrats Slubble! How 'bout another hundy?
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
Well done slug.go!!!
From step one you've built a solid quit-- great job, congrats, and thanks!
Congrats Slubble! How 'bout another hundy?
Way to work Slug. Looking forward to racking up more +1's with you.
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
Well done slug.go!!!
From step one you've built a solid quit-- great job, congrats, and thanks!
Congrats Slubble! How 'bout another hundy?
Way to work Slug. Looking forward to racking up more +1's with you.
Congrats Slug, great to be quit with you!
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
Well done slug.go!!!
From step one you've built a solid quit-- great job, congrats, and thanks!
Congrats Slubble! How 'bout another hundy?
Way to work Slug. Looking forward to racking up more +1's with you.
Congrats Slug, great to be quit with you!
200 days is a great quit. Congrats. Keep grinding
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Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
Well done slug.go!!!
From step one you've built a solid quit-- great job, congrats, and thanks!
Congrats Slubble! How 'bout another hundy?
Way to work Slug. Looking forward to racking up more +1's with you.
Congrats Slug, great to be quit with you!
Congrats Slug Great Accomplishment...
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
Well done slug.go!!!
From step one you've built a solid quit-- great job, congrats, and thanks!
Congrats Slubble! How 'bout another hundy?
Way to work Slug. Looking forward to racking up more +1's with you.
Congrats Slug, great to be quit with you!
Congrats Slug Great Accomplishment...
Now I feel bad for not starting a gortex of congrats and other nonsense in your intro. Happy 200. See you tomorrow for 201.
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
Well done slug.go!!!
From step one you've built a solid quit-- great job, congrats, and thanks!
Congrats Slubble! How 'bout another hundy?
Way to work Slug. Looking forward to racking up more +1's with you.
Congrats Slug, great to be quit with you!
Congrats Slug Great Accomplishment...
Now I feel bad for not starting a gortex of congrats and other nonsense in your intro. Happy 200. See you tomorrow for 201.
Congrats buddy. It has been a pleasure to quit beside you.
-
Wanted to get an early congrats in, nice job, slugger!
Save me a spot on the second floor and enjoy the day!
Slugg.go - Congrats on 200 days without the can. Gotta be a good feeling.
Congrats Sluggo, thanks for helping me stay quit.
A great milestone today sir. You are a bad ass and a class act. Thanks for all that you do for this site.
200 freakin Gordons...outstanding sluggo - congrats
Double hundo for the sluggo!
Congrats slug.. A quitter of the finest caliber
congrats slug!!! Save me a seat at the second floor!
Congrats on 200 el Slug-go!!
Congrats, man.
Well done slug.go!!!
From step one you've built a solid quit-- great job, congrats, and thanks!
Congrats Slubble! How 'bout another hundy?
Way to work Slug. Looking forward to racking up more +1's with you.
Congrats Slug, great to be quit with you!
Congrats Slug Great Accomplishment...
Now I feel bad for not starting a gortex of congrats and other nonsense in your intro. Happy 200. See you tomorrow for 201.
Congrats buddy. It has been a pleasure to quit beside you.
Congrats slug.go great milestone.
Milestone slug.gortex or slortex
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My fellow aviator.......Awesome. Congrats on 200. Hope you are well
Baker
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My fellow aviator.......Awesome. Congrats on 200. Hope you are well
Baker
Yah congrats Slug on 200. I cant fly a plane , so I will have to settle for being a fellow flatulator!
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My fellow aviator.......Awesome. Congrats on 200. Hope you are well
Baker
Yah congrats Slug on 200. I cant fly a plane , so I will have to settle for being a fellow flatulator!
sluggo, I never had a doubt you would get to the second floor and beyond. Keep it up brother, it gets way better! QLF w/ you EDD.
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Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
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Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Bravo! Congrats on the 3rd floor... HUGE accomplishment!
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Congrats Slubs!! Take your rightful position amongst the scores of oiled up, half-naked warriors that are fighting mythological beasts and plot lines.
Or just keep on doing what you're doing...
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Congrats Slubs!! Take your rightful position amongst the scores of oiled up, half-naked warriors that are fighting mythological beasts and plot lines.
Or just keep on doing what you're doing...
Badassery personified. Gratz man!
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Congrats Slubs!! Take your rightful position amongst the scores of oiled up, half-naked warriors that are fighting mythological beasts and plot lines.
Or just keep on doing what you're doing...
Badassery personified. Gratz man!
Happy 300 Slug!!!!! your awesome!!!!! 'Cheers'
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Congrats Slubs!! Take your rightful position amongst the scores of oiled up, half-naked warriors that are fighting mythological beasts and plot lines.
Or just keep on doing what you're doing...
Badassery personified. Gratz man!
Happy 300 Slug!!!!! your awesome!!!!! 'Cheers'
Congrats, bro.
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Congrats Slubs!! Take your rightful position amongst the scores of oiled up, half-naked warriors that are fighting mythological beasts and plot lines.
Or just keep on doing what you're doing...
Badassery personified. Gratz man!
Happy 300 Slug!!!!! your awesome!!!!! 'Cheers'
Congrats, bro.
Congrats!!!! its a hop skip and a jump now to a year...
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Congrats Slubs!! Take your rightful position amongst the scores of oiled up, half-naked warriors that are fighting mythological beasts and plot lines.
Or just keep on doing what you're doing...
Badassery personified. Gratz man!
Happy 300 Slug!!!!! your awesome!!!!! 'Cheers'
Congrats, bro.
Congrats!!!! its a hop skip and a jump now to a year...
badassery has it's captains- well done Slug.go! 'boob' 'boob' 'boob'
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Congrats Slubs!! Take your rightful position amongst the scores of oiled up, half-naked warriors that are fighting mythological beasts and plot lines.
Or just keep on doing what you're doing...
Badassery personified. Gratz man!
Happy 300 Slug!!!!! your awesome!!!!! 'Cheers'
Congrats, bro.
Congrats!!!! its a hop skip and a jump now to a year...
badassery has it's captains- well done Slug.go! 'boob' 'boob' 'boob'
HELL YES ON 300 .GO! FANFREAKINTASTIC!
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Congrats Slubs!! Take your rightful position amongst the scores of oiled up, half-naked warriors that are fighting mythological beasts and plot lines.
Or just keep on doing what you're doing...
Badassery personified. Gratz man!
Happy 300 Slug!!!!! your awesome!!!!! 'Cheers'
Congrats, bro.
Congrats!!!! its a hop skip and a jump now to a year...
badassery has it's captains- well done Slug.go! 'boob' 'boob' 'boob'
HELL YES ON 300 .GO! FANFREAKINTASTIC!
Man Slug.go, I remember the day you joined. Way to be, and congrats! What you do here is most appreciated.
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Congrats Slubs!! Take your rightful position amongst the scores of oiled up, half-naked warriors that are fighting mythological beasts and plot lines.
Or just keep on doing what you're doing...
Badassery personified. Gratz man!
Happy 300 Slug!!!!! your awesome!!!!! 'Cheers'
Congrats, bro.
Congrats!!!! its a hop skip and a jump now to a year...
badassery has it's captains- well done Slug.go! 'boob' 'boob' 'boob'
HELL YES ON 300 .GO! FANFREAKINTASTIC!
Man Slug.go, I remember the day you joined. Way to be, and congrats! What you do here is most appreciated.
Awww shucks, thanks, guys...means a lot to me!
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Congrats Slubs!! Take your rightful position amongst the scores of oiled up, half-naked warriors that are fighting mythological beasts and plot lines.
Or just keep on doing what you're doing...
Badassery personified. Gratz man!
Happy 300 Slug!!!!! your awesome!!!!! 'Cheers'
Congrats, bro.
Congrats!!!! its a hop skip and a jump now to a year...
badassery has it's captains- well done Slug.go! 'boob' 'boob' 'boob'
HELL YES ON 300 .GO! FANFREAKINTASTIC!
Man Slug.go, I remember the day you joined. Way to be, and congrats! What you do here is most appreciated.
Awww shucks, thanks, guys...means a lot to me!
Hey Slubs, sorry I'm late. Takes me a while to work my way over to the intros.
Our group would be a lot less ghey without you.
Thanks for that. Congrats on 3 bills. On to 365, 400. 500. 750. 1000.
Edit - Wait, what the fuck am I talking about, see you at 26, 30, 40 and 52 gordons.
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Bravo! Congrats on the 3rd floor... HUGE accomplishment!
Nice 300 slug. A lot of upside from here. Thanks for being a leader on this site.
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Bravo! Congrats on the 3rd floor... HUGE accomplishment!
Nice 300 slug. A lot of upside from here. Thanks for being a leader on this site.
Congrats Slug. Keep it up.
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Bravo! Congrats on the 3rd floor... HUGE accomplishment!
Nice 300 slug. A lot of upside from here. Thanks for being a leader on this site.
Congrats Slug. Keep it up.
You've been there for me since the beginning. Thank you my friend. Keep on quitting on.
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Bravo! Congrats on the 3rd floor... HUGE accomplishment!
Nice 300 slug. A lot of upside from here. Thanks for being a leader on this site.
Congrats Slug. Keep it up.
You've been there for me since the beginning. Thank you my friend. Keep on quitting on.
Way to go Slug. Congrats
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Bravo! Congrats on the 3rd floor... HUGE accomplishment!
Nice 300 slug. A lot of upside from here. Thanks for being a leader on this site.
Congrats Slug. Keep it up.
You've been there for me since the beginning. Thank you my friend. Keep on quitting on.
Way to go Slug. Congrats
Yup yup. Wtg slug.go! Damn proud.
-
300!!!!!! This is huge Slug!! Almost a year!! Strong work brother!
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Bravo! Congrats on the 3rd floor... HUGE accomplishment!
Nice 300 slug. A lot of upside from here. Thanks for being a leader on this site.
Congrats Slug. Keep it up.
You've been there for me since the beginning. Thank you my friend. Keep on quitting on.
Way to go Slug. Congrats
Yup yup. Wtg slug.go! Damn proud.
Well done slug.go!
-
Huge congrats on the 300 Mr. go! I've always appreciated the posts you sprinkle around KTC, as they've helped my quit as well as the quits of many others I'm sure! Quitting with you again today bro!
'worship'
Way to go Sluggo! Thanks for being here and helping so many people.
You're the man Sluggo, congrats for all you do.
Adding my congrats...3doubleoh....nice round number there slugs....Awesome! And the words of wisdom you dispense on a daily basis....more awesome!
Congrats on 300. See ya there soon
Bravo! Congrats on the 3rd floor... HUGE accomplishment!
Nice 300 slug. A lot of upside from here. Thanks for being a leader on this site.
Congrats Slug. Keep it up.
You've been there for me since the beginning. Thank you my friend. Keep on quitting on.
Way to go Slug. Congrats
Yup yup. Wtg slug.go! Damn proud.
There are a few things on this site that I will never forget.
1. Mogul being called an ass goblin. And his tequila/dip cocktail.
2. Lipi in general.
3. My favorite by far... Cumbubbles. I laughed all day.
Thanks for all that you do, bad ass.
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
Congrats on hitting 1 year.
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
Congrats on hitting 1 year.
Don't forget cubicle yankin, you stepper!!
Great job, so glad you're here! 'party' 'wave' 'party'
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
Congrats on hitting 1 year.
Don't forget cubicle yankin, you stepper!!
Great job, so glad you're here! 'party' 'wave' 'party'
Congrats on 365!!!
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
Congrats on hitting 1 year.
Don't forget cubicle yankin, you stepper!!
Great job, so glad you're here! 'party' 'wave' 'party'
Congrats on 365!!!
Happy day 365 .go. You my friend are bad ass! Celebrate today! I love your quit! 'Cheers'
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
Congrats on hitting 1 year.
Don't forget cubicle yankin, you stepper!!
Great job, so glad you're here! 'party' 'wave' 'party'
Congrats on 365!!!
Happy day 365 .go. You my friend are bad ass! Celebrate today! I love your quit! 'Cheers'
Congrats on the full trip through all four seasons.
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
Congrats on hitting 1 year.
Don't forget cubicle yankin, you stepper!!
Great job, so glad you're here! 'party' 'wave' 'party'
Congrats on 365!!!
Happy day 365 .go. You my friend are bad ass! Celebrate today! I love your quit! 'Cheers'
Congrats on the full trip through all four seasons.
You sir, are a badass quitter, and everything that KTC is about! Congrats Slug.go
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
Congrats on hitting 1 year.
Don't forget cubicle yankin, you stepper!!
Great job, so glad you're here! 'party' 'wave' 'party'
Congrats on 365!!!
Happy day 365 .go. You my friend are bad ass! Celebrate today! I love your quit! 'Cheers'
Congrats on the full trip through all four seasons.
You sir, are a badass quitter, and everything that KTC is about! Congrats Slug.go
Pure badass!
-
Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
Congrats on hitting 1 year.
Don't forget cubicle yankin, you stepper!!
Great job, so glad you're here! 'party' 'wave' 'party'
Congrats on 365!!!
Happy day 365 .go. You my friend are bad ass! Celebrate today! I love your quit! 'Cheers'
Congrats on the full trip through all four seasons.
You sir, are a badass quitter, and everything that KTC is about! Congrats Slug.go
Pure badass!
Nicely done pal
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Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
Congrats on hitting 1 year.
Don't forget cubicle yankin, you stepper!!
Great job, so glad you're here! 'party' 'wave' 'party'
Congrats on 365!!!
Happy day 365 .go. You my friend are bad ass! Celebrate today! I love your quit! 'Cheers'
Congrats on the full trip through all four seasons.
You sir, are a badass quitter, and everything that KTC is about! Congrats Slug.go
Pure badass!
Nicely done pal
Slubbs was the first person to reach out to me when I quit. 1 year later he is still paving the way. I'm thankful to have you as my brother in quit.
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Your cumbubbling ass just made it a whole year nicotine free. That calls for a big ole CONGRATULATIONS.
'oh yeah' 'party2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2' 'chew2'
from your resident ass goblin.
'lick me'
Way to go Bobby CB! Congratulations!
Yea buddy! it's been one helluva ride, congratulations Slug!
Way to be bro! Enjoy your day!
One year ago you came here to quit, and quit you have! Well done Bad-Ass!
Congrats slug go! 1 yr is outstanding.
Congrats Slug.go!! 'party'
Congrats on hitting 1 year.
Don't forget cubicle yankin, you stepper!!
Great job, so glad you're here! 'party' 'wave' 'party'
Congrats on 365!!!
Happy day 365 .go. You my friend are bad ass! Celebrate today! I love your quit! 'Cheers'
Congrats on the full trip through all four seasons.
You sir, are a badass quitter, and everything that KTC is about! Congrats Slug.go
Pure badass!
Nicely done pal
Slubbs was the first person to reach out to me when I quit. 1 year later he is still paving the way. I'm thankful to have you as my brother in quit.
I caught you on the May page, but am wishing you congrats here as well. You are a big part of a lot of quits here regardless of the other shit.