KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum

Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Element on May 10, 2015, 07:53:00 PM

Title: Element's introduction
Post by: Element on May 10, 2015, 07:53:00 PM
Charlotte, NC area
Today I choose to quit nicotine. I will not focus on tomorrow. Today I promise and will have the integrity to keep my promise.

Last dip was yesterday morning. Skoal mint Extra, long cut. 11 years. Started when a roomate in college said that it helped him focus and study. It helped me because I would buzz like a hornet, even on skoal bandits (pouches). I can't remember the last time I had a positive feeling from tobacco. At this point I only use it so I don't get irritable and because it is so ingrained in my daily activities, like driving, showering, and relaxing. Which means I am a slave.

I work in a corporate office and canÂ’t go putting a hillybilly dip in my lip at work. And now, thanks to dip, I have (had) to chew nic gum at work just so I wouldnÂ’t get all pissy when I need to be professional. Slave? Yep. ItÂ’s so ridiculous. I am such a closet dipper.

I have kidded myself in the past thinking I can quit whenever I want. I have even quit for a few days before and say “see! I can do it” and then go back. What a fuckin’ joke, all the rationalization, lies, and bargaining is such absolute bullshit. I’m sick of it. I hate how I feel right now. Tense, achey, this is not natural. I should not be sitting here pissed off for no reason, but this is what you get when you use poison for 11 years and this is where the quit begins.

Alcohol must also be abstained from if I am to maintain the will necessary to battle the nic demon.

My dad is an excellent role model. He has never been addicted to anything. Why? Because his father was an abusive alcoholic and smoker. Died at 60. My dad said, nope, hell no will I do that to my body and my kids. So how dare I, after being given such a gift of a father and example, start to repeat the sins of his father. My dad had an excuse to be an addict to alcohol and tobacco in the role model he had. I sure as hell donÂ’t and yet here I am on the path to addiction and early death. No longer. This ends now and today, until I die of causes other than those from alcohol and tobacco.

My work is cool enough to offer a Quitline program but that is geared towards smokers and the operators are honestly way to mamsy-pamsy for me. I have been reading the KTC forums and the whole site today and it’s clear that you don’t fuck with your quit. Some sorry ass folks come cryin’ back like oh I was weak oh I bought a can. They get hell and in a lot of cases get kicked out. Shit, that’s for real. And guess what? I fucking need that kind of pressure! Because I’m a fucking slave and all this touchy feely bullshit doesn’t work. Quiting fucking sucks, it will fucking suck, embrace it if you want to live. Otherwise, slap them shackles back on and enjoy your demise. I read that quit contract and I was like, uhm, exactly. “I wish I would have started tobacco earlier.” Is what got me. Uh, hell no I don’t. I wish I had never started. But here we are.

More on why I want to quit: It keeps me indoors because I'm ashamed of it. It keeps me sedentary because it's not something I like to do while moving around and I have associated it (hopefully not permanently) with video games. I'm a big gamer and I do nothing to relax except play games. (I own 200+ games on Steam, play mainly Blizzard/Valve titles). Very little TV, almost only games. Not healthy either but we'll tackle that after I get rid of the poison I keep putting in my lip. I think the addiction of games goes hand in hand with the nic. I'm not ready to quit games yet because I don't think games are evil but I am aware it is a major trigger.

The other problem is that I freakinÂ’ love it. I have it so associated with the pleasure of relaxation. And not having it, with absolute stress. Part of this 100 day transformation has to be to come to despise dip. Loathe it. Puke when I see and smell it. IÂ’ve refreshed myself with the scare-straight stories of folks losing their jaws, their lives, painful cancers that leave behind loved ones. ThatÂ’s really helped me today.

As if thatÂ’s not enough, I have a child on the way (due early November). My first one. If I canÂ’t muster the blood, guts, and nuts necessary to quit and stay quit this time then I am a sorry sack of shit that deserves to die young with half a jaw. I refuse to accept that path. As if I donÂ’t have ultimate control, free will in this equation. A lot of what I have read on the site has helped me see that I am not alone in how people can literally resign themselves to death, for a weed. A FUCKING WEED, in the lip. Are you fucking kidding me. ItÂ’s madness. Not me. Not anymore.
Until I came to this site and read the rules of joining a group I had planned to quit the can but keep on with the nic gum (like previous bouts of dip-free life). Not anymore. I have finally come around and see that the problem is not dip perse, but nicotine.

IÂ’m a Christ-follower, even if the language is currently nic-bitch controlled. I apologize. Pray for me. I want to go back to the joy-filled, encouraging, person I was before tobacco stole that from me. I want that for me. I want to come out of the shadows and not feel like IÂ’m hiding anything about me. I want this for my wife, who deserves a loving partner who doesnÂ’t get snappy when he hasnÂ’t had his little weedgame time, and for my future child, who needs to have a good role model who isnÂ’t a slave to any substance and above all IS ALIVE LONG ENOUGH TO SEE THEM GROW OLD.

Cmark called me just now and said the first 3 days are the worst. ItÂ’s true, IÂ’ve done this before. I got my seeds and my water bottle. Thanks for all the support so far. ItÂ’s never felt as possible as it does now. IÂ’ve burned the ships. ThereÂ’s no going back. IÂ’m all piss and vinegar right now on day 1. I give you all the right to shove my nose in this message on Day 10, 50, 100, 1000 every day where I must admit IÂ’m an addict and will choose this day to not use nicotine.

Newly adopted mantras to close:
Stay quit. ItÂ’s life or death.
You donÂ’t have to be quit forever. YouÂ’ll be dead long before then.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Pinched on May 10, 2015, 08:41:00 PM
Quote from: Element
Charlotte, NC area
Today I choose to quit nicotine. I will not focus on tomorrow. Today I promise and will have the integrity to keep my promise.

Last dip was yesterday morning. Skoal mint Extra, long cut. 11 years. Started when a roomate in college said that it helped him focus and study. It helped me because I would buzz like a hornet, even on skoal bandits (pouches). I can't remember the last time I had a positive feeling from tobacco. At this point I only use it so I don't get irritable and because it is so ingrained in my daily activities, like driving, showering, and relaxing. Which means I am a slave.

I work in a corporate office and canÂ’t go putting a hillybilly dip in my lip at work. And now, thanks to dip, I have (had) to chew nic gum at work just so I wouldnÂ’t get all pissy when I need to be professional. Slave? Yep. ItÂ’s so ridiculous. I am such a closet dipper.

I have kidded myself in the past thinking I can quit whenever I want. I have even quit for a few days before and say “see! I can do it” and then go back. What a fuckin’ joke, all the rationalization, lies, and bargaining is such absolute bullshit. I’m sick of it. I hate how I feel right now. Tense, achey, this is not natural. I should not be sitting here pissed off for no reason, but this is what you get when you use poison for 11 years and this is where the quit begins.

Alcohol must also be abstained from if I am to maintain the will necessary to battle the nic demon.

My dad is an excellent role model. He has never been addicted to anything. Why? Because his father was an abusive alcoholic and smoker. Died at 60. My dad said, nope, hell no will I do that to my body and my kids. So how dare I, after being given such a gift of a father and example, start to repeat the sins of his father. My dad had an excuse to be an addict to alcohol and tobacco in the role model he had. I sure as hell donÂ’t and yet here I am on the path to addiction and early death. No longer. This ends now and today, until I die of causes other than those from alcohol and tobacco.

My work is cool enough to offer a Quitline program but that is geared towards smokers and the operators are honestly way to mamsy-pamsy for me. I have been reading the KTC forums and the whole site today and it’s clear that you don’t fuck with your quit. Some sorry ass folks come cryin’ back like oh I was weak oh I bought a can. They get hell and in a lot of cases get kicked out. Shit, that’s for real. And guess what? I fucking need that kind of pressure! Because I’m a fucking slave and all this touchy feely bullshit doesn’t work. Quiting fucking sucks, it will fucking suck, embrace it if you want to live. Otherwise, slap them shackles back on and enjoy your demise. I read that quit contract and I was like, uhm, exactly. “I wish I would have started tobacco earlier.” Is what got me. Uh, hell no I don’t. I wish I had never started. But here we are.

More on why I want to quit: It keeps me indoors because I'm ashamed of it. It keeps me sedentary because it's not something I like to do while moving around and I have associated it (hopefully not permanently) with video games. I'm a big gamer and I do nothing to relax except play games. (I own 200+ games on Steam, play mainly Blizzard/Valve titles). Very little TV, almost only games. Not healthy either but we'll tackle that after I get rid of the poison I keep putting in my lip. I think the addiction of games goes hand in hand with the nic. I'm not ready to quit games yet because I don't think games are evil but I am aware it is a major trigger.

The other problem is that I freakinÂ’ love it. I have it so associated with the pleasure of relaxation. And not having it, with absolute stress. Part of this 100 day transformation has to be to come to despise dip. Loathe it. Puke when I see and smell it. IÂ’ve refreshed myself with the scare-straight stories of folks losing their jaws, their lives, painful cancers that leave behind loved ones. ThatÂ’s really helped me today.

As if thatÂ’s not enough, I have a child on the way (due early November). My first one. If I canÂ’t muster the blood, guts, and nuts necessary to quit and stay quit this time then I am a sorry sack of shit that deserves to die young with half a jaw. I refuse to accept that path. As if I donÂ’t have ultimate control, free will in this equation. A lot of what I have read on the site has helped me see that I am not alone in how people can literally resign themselves to death, for a weed. A FUCKING WEED, in the lip. Are you fucking kidding me. ItÂ’s madness. Not me. Not anymore.
Until I came to this site and read the rules of joining a group I had planned to quit the can but keep on with the nic gum (like previous bouts of dip-free life). Not anymore. I have finally come around and see that the problem is not dip perse, but nicotine.

IÂ’m a Christ-follower, even if the language is currently nic-bitch controlled. I apologize. Pray for me. I want to go back to the joy-filled, encouraging, person I was before tobacco stole that from me. I want that for me. I want to come out of the shadows and not feel like IÂ’m hiding anything about me. I want this for my wife, who deserves a loving partner who doesnÂ’t get snappy when he hasnÂ’t had his little weedgame time, and for my future child, who needs to have a good role model who isnÂ’t a slave to any substance and above all IS ALIVE LONG ENOUGH TO SEE THEM GROW OLD.

Cmark called me just now and said the first 3 days are the worst. ItÂ’s true, IÂ’ve done this before. I got my seeds and my water bottle. Thanks for all the support so far. ItÂ’s never felt as possible as it does now. IÂ’ve burned the ships. ThereÂ’s no going back. IÂ’m all piss and vinegar right now on day 1. I give you all the right to shove my nose in this message on Day 10, 50, 100, 1000 every day where I must admit IÂ’m an addict and will choose this day to not use nicotine.

Newly adopted mantras to close:
Stay quit. ItÂ’s life or death.
You donÂ’t have to be quit forever. YouÂ’ll be dead long before then.
Element, welcome to KTC, I see not only are you posting roll but you also commented on the thread of other fellow quitters. That is badass bud. It is great to have a brother a day away from your own, I too have that and he is not only a brother on KTC he is a damn fine friend of mine now. Come to think of it he is also in NC, you might try looking him up "JLud 007" from October 2013 Quit Group.

Keep on doing this and being a beast in quit and others will follow, be prepared though because some will fail.

Beyond finding an alternative exercise and lots of water helps. When I first quit I would drop and do pushups or burpees when a craving came on. I kept going until the craving faded away. Not only did the craving leave so did my belly fat.

Welcome brother,
P
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: worktowin on May 10, 2015, 09:13:00 PM
Quote from: Pinched
Quote from: Element
Charlotte, NC area
Today I choose to quit nicotine. I will not focus on tomorrow. Today I promise and will have the integrity to keep my promise.

Last dip was yesterday morning. Skoal mint Extra, long cut. 11 years. Started when a roomate in college said that it helped him focus and study. It helped me because I would buzz like a hornet, even on skoal bandits (pouches). I can't remember the last time I had a positive feeling from tobacco. At this point I only use it so I don't get irritable and because it is so ingrained in my daily activities, like driving, showering, and relaxing. Which means I am a slave.

I work in a corporate office and canÂ’t go putting a hillybilly dip in my lip at work. And now, thanks to dip, I have (had) to chew nic gum at work just so I wouldnÂ’t get all pissy when I need to be professional. Slave? Yep. ItÂ’s so ridiculous. I am such a closet dipper.

I have kidded myself in the past thinking I can quit whenever I want. I have even quit for a few days before and say “see! I can do it” and then go back. What a fuckin’ joke, all the rationalization, lies, and bargaining is such absolute bullshit. I’m sick of it. I hate how I feel right now. Tense, achey, this is not natural. I should not be sitting here pissed off for no reason, but this is what you get when you use poison for 11 years and this is where the quit begins.

Alcohol must also be abstained from if I am to maintain the will necessary to battle the nic demon.

My dad is an excellent role model. He has never been addicted to anything. Why? Because his father was an abusive alcoholic and smoker. Died at 60. My dad said, nope, hell no will I do that to my body and my kids. So how dare I, after being given such a gift of a father and example, start to repeat the sins of his father. My dad had an excuse to be an addict to alcohol and tobacco in the role model he had. I sure as hell donÂ’t and yet here I am on the path to addiction and early death. No longer. This ends now and today, until I die of causes other than those from alcohol and tobacco.

My work is cool enough to offer a Quitline program but that is geared towards smokers and the operators are honestly way to mamsy-pamsy for me. I have been reading the KTC forums and the whole site today and it’s clear that you don’t fuck with your quit. Some sorry ass folks come cryin’ back like oh I was weak oh I bought a can. They get hell and in a lot of cases get kicked out. Shit, that’s for real. And guess what? I fucking need that kind of pressure! Because I’m a fucking slave and all this touchy feely bullshit doesn’t work. Quiting fucking sucks, it will fucking suck, embrace it if you want to live. Otherwise, slap them shackles back on and enjoy your demise. I read that quit contract and I was like, uhm, exactly. “I wish I would have started tobacco earlier.” Is what got me. Uh, hell no I don’t. I wish I had never started. But here we are.

More on why I want to quit: It keeps me indoors because I'm ashamed of it. It keeps me sedentary because it's not something I like to do while moving around and I have associated it (hopefully not permanently) with video games. I'm a big gamer and I do nothing to relax except play games. (I own 200+ games on Steam, play mainly Blizzard/Valve titles). Very little TV, almost only games. Not healthy either but we'll tackle that after I get rid of the poison I keep putting in my lip. I think the addiction of games goes hand in hand with the nic. I'm not ready to quit games yet because I don't think games are evil but I am aware it is a major trigger.

The other problem is that I freakinÂ’ love it. I have it so associated with the pleasure of relaxation. And not having it, with absolute stress. Part of this 100 day transformation has to be to come to despise dip. Loathe it. Puke when I see and smell it. IÂ’ve refreshed myself with the scare-straight stories of folks losing their jaws, their lives, painful cancers that leave behind loved ones. ThatÂ’s really helped me today.

As if thatÂ’s not enough, I have a child on the way (due early November). My first one. If I canÂ’t muster the blood, guts, and nuts necessary to quit and stay quit this time then I am a sorry sack of shit that deserves to die young with half a jaw. I refuse to accept that path. As if I donÂ’t have ultimate control, free will in this equation. A lot of what I have read on the site has helped me see that I am not alone in how people can literally resign themselves to death, for a weed. A FUCKING WEED, in the lip. Are you fucking kidding me. ItÂ’s madness. Not me. Not anymore.
Until I came to this site and read the rules of joining a group I had planned to quit the can but keep on with the nic gum (like previous bouts of dip-free life). Not anymore. I have finally come around and see that the problem is not dip perse, but nicotine.

IÂ’m a Christ-follower, even if the language is currently nic-bitch controlled. I apologize. Pray for me. I want to go back to the joy-filled, encouraging, person I was before tobacco stole that from me. I want that for me. I want to come out of the shadows and not feel like IÂ’m hiding anything about me. I want this for my wife, who deserves a loving partner who doesnÂ’t get snappy when he hasnÂ’t had his little weedgame time, and for my future child, who needs to have a good role model who isnÂ’t a slave to any substance and above all IS ALIVE LONG ENOUGH TO SEE THEM GROW OLD.

Cmark called me just now and said the first 3 days are the worst. ItÂ’s true, IÂ’ve done this before. I got my seeds and my water bottle. Thanks for all the support so far. ItÂ’s never felt as possible as it does now. IÂ’ve burned the ships. ThereÂ’s no going back. IÂ’m all piss and vinegar right now on day 1. I give you all the right to shove my nose in this message on Day 10, 50, 100, 1000 every day where I must admit IÂ’m an addict and will choose this day to not use nicotine.

Newly adopted mantras to close:
Stay quit. ItÂ’s life or death.
You donÂ’t have to be quit forever. YouÂ’ll be dead long before then.
Element, welcome to KTC, I see not only are you posting roll but you also commented on the thread of other fellow quitters. That is badass bud. It is great to have a brother a day away from your own, I too have that and he is not only a brother on KTC he is a damn fine friend of mine now. Come to think of it he is also in NC, you might try looking him up "JLud 007" from October 2013 Quit Group.

Keep on doing this and being a beast in quit and others will follow, be prepared though because some will fail.

Beyond finding an alternative exercise and lots of water helps. When I first quit I would drop and do pushups or burpees when a craving came on. I kept going until the craving faded away. Not only did the craving leave so did my belly fat.

Welcome brother,
P
One of the greatest gifts of this site is knowing that you aren't alone.

Ninja dipper? Tons of us. Long long showers, driving to nowhere for hours, hiding in shame? Tons of us. Believed (past tense) that nicotine helped us relax/achieve/focus? Most of us.

That last part is bullshit. Nicotine takes. Money. Health. And time. Ridiculous really. You will grow to hate that part of your intro in time - and anger will fuel your quit. If I can do this, trust me you can.

You won't believe how many non hillbillies are on this site by the way. Lol.

(I'm from the ozarks originally, so I don't count)

Welcome aboard. If I can help - shoot me a pm.

-wtw
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Element on May 10, 2015, 09:21:00 PM
Thanks everyone for the quick replies!
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: DL56 on May 10, 2015, 09:43:00 PM
Welcome, Element! Great intro. Sounds like you have a good grasp on how terrible it is to have nicotine in your life. I'm on day 15 and that first week was definitely a battle. Hang in there and live on this site -- it's helped me out a TON, especially during the first few days.

One night I was having a killer craving, just absolutely brutal fog and withdrawal-related depression, and hopped on chat. Hearing people tell me that it was completely normal and that they could relate to what I was going through made me feel a ton better. Get on over to the August quit group and post roll every damn day. You have a support group now that will hold you accountable and will make sure you hold us accountable too.

Let's kick nicotine's ass together today.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Diesel2112 on May 10, 2015, 10:41:00 PM
You don't love it. You don't need it and you never did.

You had everything you needed to be relaxed and focused until you introduced nicotine to your system.

The myth didnt start when you put that first dip in, it started when you spit it out. Once you spit that dip and that nicotine leaves your system, you are left with an empty and insecure feeling. When you introduce nicotine back into your system you might actually feel more relaxed and secure than you did a moment prior but really your brain is being tricked into believing you have received some kind of pleasure prop. That's simply not true.

The only thing you are doing is relieving withdrawal pang between dips. Nicotine fills NO voids in your life. It only creates more.

Hard concept to grasp? Sure. But it's the truth.

One of the hardest aspects of quitting is coming to terms with the FACT that nioctine does NOTHING for you. It's just that we've poisoned and brainwashed ourselves for so long, we start to believe the lies nicotine creates. I used to think I could never enjoy golf again without a dip in until my wife said, "my uncles golfed 3 times a week for 20 years and doesn't smoke or dip and he loves golf".

Duhhhh.

You're brain needs a lot of rewiring and while it won't be easy it certainly will be worth it.

This place will help you rewire. Stick around.

Quit on...
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Element on May 11, 2015, 07:58:00 AM
DL56, Diesel. Thank you! Off to post role on Day 2.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Mr. Cope on May 11, 2015, 09:59:00 AM
Quote from: worktowin
Quote from: Pinched
Quote from: Element
Charlotte, NC area
Today I choose to quit nicotine. I will not focus on tomorrow. Today I promise and will have the integrity to keep my promise.

Last dip was yesterday morning. Skoal mint Extra, long cut. 11 years. Started when a roomate in college said that it helped him focus and study. It helped me because I would buzz like a hornet, even on skoal bandits (pouches). I can't remember the last time I had a positive feeling from tobacco. At this point I only use it so I don't get irritable and because it is so ingrained in my daily activities, like driving, showering, and relaxing. Which means I am a slave.

I work in a corporate office and canÂ’t go putting a hillybilly dip in my lip at work. And now, thanks to dip, I have (had) to chew nic gum at work just so I wouldnÂ’t get all pissy when I need to be professional. Slave? Yep. ItÂ’s so ridiculous. I am such a closet dipper.

I have kidded myself in the past thinking I can quit whenever I want. I have even quit for a few days before and say “see! I can do it” and then go back. What a fuckin’ joke, all the rationalization, lies, and bargaining is such absolute bullshit. I’m sick of it. I hate how I feel right now. Tense, achey, this is not natural. I should not be sitting here pissed off for no reason, but this is what you get when you use poison for 11 years and this is where the quit begins.

Alcohol must also be abstained from if I am to maintain the will necessary to battle the nic demon.

My dad is an excellent role model. He has never been addicted to anything. Why? Because his father was an abusive alcoholic and smoker. Died at 60. My dad said, nope, hell no will I do that to my body and my kids. So how dare I, after being given such a gift of a father and example, start to repeat the sins of his father. My dad had an excuse to be an addict to alcohol and tobacco in the role model he had. I sure as hell donÂ’t and yet here I am on the path to addiction and early death. No longer. This ends now and today, until I die of causes other than those from alcohol and tobacco.

My work is cool enough to offer a Quitline program but that is geared towards smokers and the operators are honestly way to mamsy-pamsy for me. I have been reading the KTC forums and the whole site today and it’s clear that you don’t fuck with your quit. Some sorry ass folks come cryin’ back like oh I was weak oh I bought a can. They get hell and in a lot of cases get kicked out. Shit, that’s for real. And guess what? I fucking need that kind of pressure! Because I’m a fucking slave and all this touchy feely bullshit doesn’t work. Quiting fucking sucks, it will fucking suck, embrace it if you want to live. Otherwise, slap them shackles back on and enjoy your demise. I read that quit contract and I was like, uhm, exactly. “I wish I would have started tobacco earlier.” Is what got me. Uh, hell no I don’t. I wish I had never started. But here we are.

More on why I want to quit: It keeps me indoors because I'm ashamed of it. It keeps me sedentary because it's not something I like to do while moving around and I have associated it (hopefully not permanently) with video games. I'm a big gamer and I do nothing to relax except play games. (I own 200+ games on Steam, play mainly Blizzard/Valve titles). Very little TV, almost only games. Not healthy either but we'll tackle that after I get rid of the poison I keep putting in my lip. I think the addiction of games goes hand in hand with the nic. I'm not ready to quit games yet because I don't think games are evil but I am aware it is a major trigger.

The other problem is that I freakinÂ’ love it. I have it so associated with the pleasure of relaxation. And not having it, with absolute stress. Part of this 100 day transformation has to be to come to despise dip. Loathe it. Puke when I see and smell it. IÂ’ve refreshed myself with the scare-straight stories of folks losing their jaws, their lives, painful cancers that leave behind loved ones. ThatÂ’s really helped me today.

As if thatÂ’s not enough, I have a child on the way (due early November). My first one. If I canÂ’t muster the blood, guts, and nuts necessary to quit and stay quit this time then I am a sorry sack of shit that deserves to die young with half a jaw. I refuse to accept that path. As if I donÂ’t have ultimate control, free will in this equation. A lot of what I have read on the site has helped me see that I am not alone in how people can literally resign themselves to death, for a weed. A FUCKING WEED, in the lip. Are you fucking kidding me. ItÂ’s madness. Not me. Not anymore.
Until I came to this site and read the rules of joining a group I had planned to quit the can but keep on with the nic gum (like previous bouts of dip-free life). Not anymore. I have finally come around and see that the problem is not dip perse, but nicotine.

IÂ’m a Christ-follower, even if the language is currently nic-bitch controlled. I apologize. Pray for me. I want to go back to the joy-filled, encouraging, person I was before tobacco stole that from me. I want that for me. I want to come out of the shadows and not feel like IÂ’m hiding anything about me. I want this for my wife, who deserves a loving partner who doesnÂ’t get snappy when he hasnÂ’t had his little weedgame time, and for my future child, who needs to have a good role model who isnÂ’t a slave to any substance and above all IS ALIVE LONG ENOUGH TO SEE THEM GROW OLD.

Cmark called me just now and said the first 3 days are the worst. ItÂ’s true, IÂ’ve done this before. I got my seeds and my water bottle. Thanks for all the support so far. ItÂ’s never felt as possible as it does now. IÂ’ve burned the ships. ThereÂ’s no going back. IÂ’m all piss and vinegar right now on day 1. I give you all the right to shove my nose in this message on Day 10, 50, 100, 1000 every day where I must admit IÂ’m an addict and will choose this day to not use nicotine.

Newly adopted mantras to close:
Stay quit. ItÂ’s life or death.
You donÂ’t have to be quit forever. YouÂ’ll be dead long before then.
Element, welcome to KTC, I see not only are you posting roll but you also commented on the thread of other fellow quitters. That is badass bud. It is great to have a brother a day away from your own, I too have that and he is not only a brother on KTC he is a damn fine friend of mine now. Come to think of it he is also in NC, you might try looking him up "JLud 007" from October 2013 Quit Group.

Keep on doing this and being a beast in quit and others will follow, be prepared though because some will fail.

Beyond finding an alternative exercise and lots of water helps. When I first quit I would drop and do pushups or burpees when a craving came on. I kept going until the craving faded away. Not only did the craving leave so did my belly fat.

Welcome brother,
P
One of the greatest gifts of this site is knowing that you aren't alone.

Ninja dipper? Tons of us. Long long showers, driving to nowhere for hours, hiding in shame? Tons of us. Believed (past tense) that nicotine helped us relax/achieve/focus? Most of us.

That last part is bullshit. Nicotine takes. Money. Health. And time. Ridiculous really. You will grow to hate that part of your intro in time - and anger will fuel your quit. If I can do this, trust me you can.

You won't believe how many non hillbillies are on this site by the way. Lol.

(I'm from the ozarks originally, so I don't count)

Welcome aboard. If I can help - shoot me a pm.

-wtw
Hey Element. Mr. Cope here. I too am from the Charlotte area. Lived in South Charlotte for 2.5 years but just recently (last December) built a house on Lake Wylie over in SC. Sent you a PM with my contact info. If you need local support hit me up, we can text, talk, meet, whatever man.

Today I quit with you brother!
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Element on May 11, 2015, 12:23:00 PM
Thanks Mr. Cope! This morning has been tough! It's encouraging to know I am supported by you.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Thumblewort on May 11, 2015, 02:29:00 PM
I see a roll post, so we both quit today. Good stuff!
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Bean on May 11, 2015, 04:19:00 PM
Congrats on a great choice, Element. My two cents on your intro...one comment, really.

"Quitting fucking sucks." Really? Think about that. Quitting leads to freedom. Not quitting leads to tongue and jaw removal, chemo, feeding tubes, disfigurement and death. Quitting save you money, saves you time, lets YOU be the dad in your child's life, and let's you spend time with your wife. Not quitting takes your money, time and let's some other dude raise your child and be with your wife.

I don't know, buddy...I'm trying to see it your way, but I'm having a hard time.

The attitude you have when you do anything will largely determine your success. Make yourself DECIDE that you will ENJOY quitting. Embracing the suck means choosing to enjoy EVERTHING about it. Bring on the anxiety, restlessness, constipation, confusion, headaches, etc. Those things are WONDERFUL. Those things are your body telling you that YOU ARE DOING THIS RIGHT!!!

Saying "quitting sucks" is the Nic Bitch talking. Like pulling the pistol out of your mouth and reminiscing about the taste of the barrel? Or getting released from prison and going back for the shitty food and group showers. WTF, right??!! Take note of freedom. Really experience it. Don't let a moment go by without appreciating it. You got this. YOU can do this.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Element on May 11, 2015, 07:25:00 PM
Quote from: Bean
Congrats on a great choice, Element. My two cents on your intro...one comment, really.

"Quitting fucking sucks." Really? Think about that. Quitting leads to freedom. Not quitting leads to tongue and jaw removal, chemo, feeding tubes, disfigurement and death. Quitting save you money, saves you time, lets YOU be the dad in your child's life, and let's you spend time with your wife. Not quitting takes your money, time and let's some other dude raise your child and be with your wife.

I don't know, buddy...I'm trying to see it your way, but I'm having a hard time.

The attitude you have when you do anything will largely determine your success. Make yourself DECIDE that you will ENJOY quitting. Embracing the suck means choosing to enjoy EVERTHING about it. Bring on the anxiety, restlessness, constipation, confusion, headaches, etc. Those things are WONDERFUL. Those things are your body telling you that YOU ARE DOING THIS RIGHT!!!

Saying "quitting sucks" is the Nic Bitch talking. Like pulling the pistol out of your mouth and reminiscing about the taste of the barrel? Or getting released from prison and going back for the shitty food and group showers. WTF, right??!! Take note of freedom. Really experience it. Don't let a moment go by without appreciating it. You got this. YOU can do this.
Holy shit you're right. I'm going to learn to love the quit. Not quitting is what sucks. Thank you, Bean. This was a solid gold post for me right now.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Element on May 11, 2015, 09:28:00 PM
By the way if you struggle with grinding teeth at night try this:
http://doctorsnightguard.com/ (http://doctorsnightguard.com/)
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: TLOC81 on May 13, 2015, 07:30:00 PM
Best decision you could have made. I have to second all the advice in the comments above and just advise you to read, read, and read some more. I'm quit with you Element. Just keep posting and you'll have a good chance at gaining back your freedom.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Jlud007 on May 14, 2015, 08:47:00 PM
Keep up the good work Element! Like w2w said we come from all walks here blue collar to professionals. We all have the battle with this shit in common, you'll learn to love you're quit and hate the nic if you continue one day at a time. That's the other common thread that binds us, from the guy on day 1 to someone with thousands of days... we all keep that promise one day at a time. I've got your back just keep posting brother.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Element on May 18, 2015, 12:44:00 PM
Since it looks like these intro threads are a type of journal of one's quit (for years even). I'm going to post this here. Yesterday afternoon (Day 8) until around noon today Day 9 I had this headache. I was surprised because I've had 3 awesome days, since day 5. That is all.

Also, I can't join live chat. I get this message:
"Connection failed, please try later!"

Causes? Fixes?
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: quark on May 18, 2015, 02:35:00 PM
Quote from: Element
Since it looks like these intro threads are a type of journal of one's quit (for years even). I'm going to post this here. Yesterday afternoon (Day 8) until around noon today Day 9 I had this headache. I was surprised because I've had 3 awesome days, since day 5. That is all.

Also, I can't join live chat. I get this message:
"Connection failed, please try later!"

Causes? Fixes?
Amigo,

Ninja dippers develop a lot of bad habits in order to open time and alone-space to feed the nicotine addiction. Now that you aren't feeding that nicotine addiction, start working on those bad habits. Now you don't need to confine yourself indoors. Start taking a walk every afternoon. If it looks like thunderstorms, learn to enjoy getting soaked in the rain. Start eating well. Start training for 5K runs, or participating in the push-up challenge like the June group, but get that body active and in public. You've been on nicotine for over a decade, and it's going to take a while for your body to adapt to being without it, so don't sweat the headache: take ibuprofen, stay off alcohol, eat well, get outside and breathe the fresh air. Throw out those old ninja habits. Start to develop healthy habits instead. The body will respond accordingly.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: pab1964 on May 18, 2015, 08:17:00 PM
Well if I'd just take one dip I wouldn't be constipated, have headaches, could sleep and could possibly get cancer! Wow not much of a choice to me. All the above will stop, when it does,everyone's different and can't tell you when! Continuing the struggle will remind you never stick that nasty shit in your mouth again! Quit on brother!
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: frankiekilledthecan on May 19, 2015, 01:56:00 AM
Hey Element,

Just quit today. Haven't had one all day. I am glad to see we both have similar experiences and I am as fed up as you with the nic. I really enjoyed reading your intro and hope we can collab on somethings on the journey (feel free to check out my intro). I am also in the corporate world, I am hoping the quit won't weigh on my new found opportunity. I don't want the side effects of the quit to affect my professional life. But I will also have my seeds and water ready for this whole week. Also... wow I can't believe how I forgot to add gaming to my intro. GAMING. Perhaps one of my largest propellants to the nic. I can't explain how much I have associated the two. Maybe we can collab on this too. What ways will gaming be the same without it. I enjoy PC/Xbone by the way when I have the time.

Dude, just wanted to shout out and say hello. I am right there with you man. Keep in touch.

Frank
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Element on May 25, 2015, 11:08:00 AM
Hey Frankie,
I just read this post. I'm gaming less. Mainly because I "enjoy" it less. Rather my thinking is changing to be: I used to game to have something to do while dipping. It kept me in one place, and out of the the public view which is perfect for ashamed dipping. The more I read about addiction and the brain I also think that I was really fucking with the reward sensors as well. Today is day 16 for me. I enjoyed a whole day out with people, no games, on a boat with 0 craves. Amazing. This hasn't happened since college.

Keep it up, Frank!
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Thumblewort on May 25, 2015, 11:55:00 AM
What kind of games? I quit with you today.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Element on May 27, 2015, 10:04:00 AM
alot. I list them in order of hours played
1. World of Warcraft (haven't played since Pandas except for 2 days)
2. TF2
3. Diablo 3
4. League of Legends (haven't played in a long time)
5. Heroes of the Storm (aka "DOTA for Dads")
6. Chivalry medieval warfare
7. Civilization 4  5
8. other random MMOs that I play with friends and then give up because they are not like WOW
9. Skyrim
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: Element on June 01, 2015, 12:27:00 PM
I am leading an all-week event at work with 20 some very talented and highly-paid people in IT. Normally I would be cramming nic gum to avoid getting cranky and short with people. At lunch I would have sneaked off to the restroom to sit and dip. One of the guys I'm working with uses an ecig. I feel sorry for his reliance on the nic. It feels so good to be free!!!
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: quark on June 01, 2015, 01:47:00 PM
Quote from: Element
I am leading an all-week event at work with 20 some very talented and highly-paid people in IT. Normally I would be cramming nic gum to avoid getting cranky and short with people. At lunch I would have sneaked off to the restroom to sit and dip. One of the guys I'm working with uses an ecig. I feel sorry for his reliance on the nic. It feels so good to be free!!!
Ah, fond memories of sitting 10 minutes on the can in a public bathroom listening to and smelling other people take a shit just so I could dip in private. I quit with you today, and leave those memories behind.
Title: Re: Element's introduction
Post by: KingNothing on July 20, 2015, 03:59:00 PM
Hey Element, are you still quit with us bud? You were 68 days quit as of 7/16. Get back in here and get to posting roll. From your intro it looks like you had a good thing going so let's "shore" it up and don't let the complacency slip back in. Quit with you today.

King