KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Turkey on February 27, 2008, 03:40:00 PM
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I am 30 y/o and have been chewing tobocco since high school. I remember my first time chewing at boy scout summer camp. Skoal wintergreen. I never felt so sick, but before the summer was over I was hooked. We would get it from the camp nurse, who we thought was so cool, army medic. I was probably 14 at the time. To this day though I still cannot chew skoal wintergreen without dry heves. Ever since then I have always found a way back to it. High school senior year was probably the most I used in a daily period. Then college when it became part of my life. Couldn't study unless I had a lipper in. From studying with a lipper it snowballed. I couldn't drive, without it, I couldn't drink without it, watch a movie, listen to music, watch tv, take a shit, shovel snow, mow the lawn, wash the car, work in the yard, etc... you know what I mean. Now I wake up in the morning, have to have my morning fix, then shower brush teeth get ready for work out the door and before I reach the car I have another. I do some traveling for work couple times a week, of course can't drive without it. I am up to a can or more a day depending on what it is I am doing. I have tried quitting a bunch of times and I always come up with all the same excuses as everyone else. I hope this time will be different, I am looking forward to getting the help from this site.
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I am 30 y/o and have been chewing tobocco since high school. I remember my first time chewing at boy scout summer camp. Skoal wintergreen. I never felt so sick, but before the summer was over I was hooked. We would get it from the camp nurse, who we thought was so cool, army medic. I was probably 14 at the time. To this day though I still cannot chew skoal wintergreen without dry heves. Ever since then I have always found a way back to it. High school senior year was probably the most I used in a daily period. Then college when it became part of my life. Couldn't study unless I had a lipper in. From studying with a lipper it snowballed. I couldn't drive, without it, I couldn't drink without it, watch a movie, listen to music, watch tv, take a shit, shovel snow, mow the lawn, wash the car, work in the yard, etc... you know what I mean. Now I wake up in the morning, have to have my morning fix, then shower brush teeth get ready for work out the door and before I reach the car I have another. I do some traveling for work couple times a week, of course can't drive without it. I am up to a can or more a day depending on what it is I am doing. I have tried quitting a bunch of times and I always come up with all the same excuses as everyone else. I hope this time will be different, I am looking forward to getting the help from this site.
welcome to the site turkey.
first off, remove the word "hope" from your vocab -- you WILL quit. you WILL succeed. you CAN do this.
i'm not going to tell you that it will be easy, but it CAN be done... you have literally THOUSANDS of people here who are either going through it with you or have been there before.
head over to june 2008 and introduce yourself to your quit brothers. buckle the chinstrap and get ready for a couple of brutal days, but keep in mind -- freedom is TOTALLY worth it.
chewie
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Welcome to June 2008 brother.
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great decision! you couldn't be in a better place than KTC to keep quit...read everything you can to become educated on what to expect, how to avoid triggers and most of all how to get help to keep from caving.
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Welcome Turkey, I dipped for 29 years and now I'm on day 59 quit if I can do it you can to. look for me in chat sometime and we'll talk.
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Many of you know that I planned on quitting Wednesday, March 5th. I chose that day because it was 7 days after I started with chantix. I want to report that I can't wait 'till Wednesday to get rid of this shit for good. Sunday afternoon with the sun shining bright seems like a good day as any, and I'm ready. I plan on waking up Monday morning like shit, if I even sleep tonight. I will sit in my daughters room watch her sleep and remind myself why I don't need this demon in my life. I want to prove to my wife that I am a strong man and can get this shit out of our lives for good. Too many times has the can gotten in the middle of our relationship. The old me would rather sit by myself with my tin than to enjoy my wife or life. How fucking lame was I to put my daughter to bed earlier than usual so I could put shit in my mouth and spit it into a fucking bottle. I look back at how ridiculus I must of looked being 30 years old and still carrying a bottle around with me wherever I would go. Fill it with breast milk put a nipple on it, same fucking idea. I have many of you to thank already for giving me the inspiration and drive to quit. I wanted to quit for myself, but looking back I think of all the hurt and suffering my addiction has caused my family and friends. So not only for myself I quit for them my wife, daughter, dear friends and killthecan.org community. It is KTC where I will look to for my support, my wife right now just rolls her eyes as to say "I have heard it all too many times before". Who could blame her I was suppose to quit when we moved in together, got married, bought our first house, the birth of my daughter. She just doesn't know how serious I am about it now. Day 1 speech, Can't wait for 100. Turkey
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Many of you know that I planned on quitting Wednesday, March 5th. I chose that day because it was 7 days after I started with chantix. I want to report that I can't wait 'till Wednesday to get rid of this shit for good. Sunday afternoon with the sun shining bright seems like a good day as any, and I'm ready. I plan on waking up Monday morning like shit, if I even sleep tonight. I will sit in my daughters room watch her sleep and remind myself why I don't need this demon in my life. I want to prove to my wife that I am a strong man and can get this shit out of our lives for good. Too many times has the can gotten in the middle of our relationship. The old me would rather sit by myself with my tin than to enjoy my wife or life. How fucking lame was I to put my daughter to bed earlier than usual so I could put shit in my mouth and spit it into a fucking bottle. I look back at how ridiculus I must of looked being 30 years old and still carrying a bottle around with me wherever I would go. Fill it with breast milk put a nipple on it, same fucking idea. I have many of you to thank already for giving me the inspiration and drive to quit. I wanted to quit for myself, but looking back I think of all the hurt and suffering my addiction has caused my family and friends. So not only for myself I quit for them my wife, daughter, dear friends and killthecan.org community. It is KTC where I will look to for my support, my wife right now just rolls her eyes as to say "I have heard it all too many times before". Who could blame her I was suppose to quit when we moved in together, got married, bought our first house, the birth of my daughter. She just doesn't know how serious I am about it now. Day 1 speech, Can't wait for 100. Turkey
well...it sounds like you've reached the bottom of your rope. Your wife doesn't believe you because you lied, cheated , and stolen from her so many times before...for a fucking fix. Get one thing straight...you ar no different than the $20 blowjob crack whore except you have a job that doesn't involve sucking dick to support your habit.
You want support, you'll find it here.
You want someone to coddle you and tell you "everything will be OK"...you find sume of that here too.
You want someone to get in your face and tell you to quit being such a fucking bitch...you find that too.
You'll find a lot in the middle.
LOOT has your word from this post. Your word is your bond. LOOT know that to everyone in your life you hold dear (wife, mother, father, daughter...shall LOOT continue?) your word is shit...as worthless as LOOT's powerball ticket.
You will NOT lie to LOOT or the people you post roll call with. If you do, there will be hell to pay. You think the looks your wife gave you when she busted you with a tin was demeaning? Trust LOOT...you do NOT want to post another Day 1 here.
Congratulations on the decision bro.
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Hey Loot - He gets it!!! $5 Bucks ays he makes the HOF and a ton more....
Welcome Turkey!!!!
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Hey Loot - He gets it!!! $5 Bucks ays he makes the HOF and a ton more....
Welcome Turkey!!!!
we'll just see now won't we franny
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I have tried quitting a bunch of times and I always come up with all the same excuses as everyone else.
Turkey,
We are a lot alike. I'm glad to be going through this quit with you.
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loot are you getting nervous? Day 24 and no stopping me. Looks like you'll be owing fran some cold hard cash.
For you lurkers who are thinking about quitting. I have this message. There hasn't been one day in my quit, good or bad, that I regret throwing the can out of my life. I can't even begin to explain how different a person I have become to my family. My wife is beginning to notice. In my short quit I can't believe how controlled I was by my addiction, habit, whatever you want to call it. It is nice to be free to do whatever I want whenever I want. I do not miss worrying about when I can have my next fix, where I am going to buy it, do I have enough to last today. I can't promise that it's easy but the reward you get is unreplaceable. I can't believe I threw away 15 + years on that shit. Well hope you get the message, I am going to go find something to eat because food tastes awesome.
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Congrats Turkey!
Stay tough, I'm looking up to you! Failure is not an option.
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Hey Loot - He gets it!!! $5 Bucks ays he makes the HOF and a ton more....
Welcome Turkey!!!!
we'll just see now won't we franny
The $5 bucks will go into the Russ Loot beer fund for when we meet.
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loot are you getting nervous? Day 24 and no stopping me. Looks like you'll be owing fran some cold hard cash.
For you lurkers who are thinking about quitting. I have this message. There hasn't been one day in my quit, good or bad, that I regret throwing the can out of my life. I can't even begin to explain how different a person I have become to my family. My wife is beginning to notice. In my short quit I can't believe how controlled I was by my addiction, habit, whatever you want to call it. It is nice to be free to do whatever I want whenever I want. I do not miss worrying about when I can have my next fix, where I am going to buy it, do I have enough to last today. I can't promise that it's easy but the reward you get is unreplaceable. I can't believe I threw away 15 + years on that shit. Well hope you get the message, I am going to go find something to eat because food tastes awesome.
nope....not nervous at all
you've got a lot of work to do bro...and it'll be $5 well spent
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loot are you getting nervous? Day 24 and no stopping me. Looks like you'll be owing fran some cold hard cash.
For you lurkers who are thinking about quitting. I have this message. There hasn't been one day in my quit, good or bad, that I regret throwing the can out of my life. I can't even begin to explain how different a person I have become to my family. My wife is beginning to notice. In my short quit I can't believe how controlled I was by my addiction, habit, whatever you want to call it. It is nice to be free to do whatever I want whenever I want. I do not miss worrying about when I can have my next fix, where I am going to buy it, do I have enough to last today. I can't promise that it's easy but the reward you get is unreplaceable. I can't believe I threw away 15 + years on that shit. Well hope you get the message, I am going to go find something to eat because food tastes awesome.
nope....not nervous at all
you've got a lot of work to do bro...and it'll be $5 well spent
I am well aware of the fact that I am only a quarter of the way till the HOF. I can honestly say that I don't picture myself going back to being a dip head. I won't lie, everyday is not easy.
I forgot to mention that I am no longer taking the chantix, my mind is stronger than any pill. I only took them for 3 weeks. Did they help? I can't really answer that question. Have I tried to quit before without them? Yes. Did I succeed? No. I did take them this time but what else is different this time? This time I really wanted to quit for myself, not that it was the right thing to do. I was tired of the habit, sick and tired of the smelly fingers, the spit, the mess, the money, the sore mouth you name it I was sick of it all. I was mad because I wanted to dip and not do anything else. To say that chantix helped, I honestly just don't know. I had all the same rages (still do at times), depression, foggy feeling, craves as I did the previous attemps. I don't regret taking it, but am glad I only took it for 3 weeks. I guess my stance on the whole thing is if you think it will give you an edge, something to lean on, what do you have to lose. The best advice I can give is, buck up get yourself a pair and just know no matter what you do the first 10 days will be an up and down ride. This quitting thing is a mind fuck. Control your mind and don't let it control you.
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I Quit! 100 days ago. I can't tell anyone how great of a feeling it truely is. The only thing I can tell you is, if you really want to know what it is to be free, Quit tobacco.
I went to the beach yesterday with my family, and holy fuck is all I can say. Do you know how many pathetic fathers I saw playing with their kids, holding their stupid Marlboro box and lighter in one hand? Building sand castles and throwing the ball with the other. Quite a few! I felt like saying "could you put the shit down for an hour and enjoy your family with both your hands free?"
The sad thing is, and this is the great part. I used to be that person, but instead of carrying around butts, I had a tin in my back pocket and brown jiz running down my chin.
So yesterday, first day at the beach with the family since my quit and it was actually the best experience I had since March 2, 2008, my Quit day, and run for freedom.
I sat there with my wife, watched my daughter play in the sand, went swimming. I had a blast. I just really enjoyed being there. I didn't have to worry about where I was going to spit and embarrasing my wife, being that guy with shit in his mouth.
I built sand castles with my daughter, tried to look for seashells, she wasn't interested, I let her poor water on my feet. Again it was a wonderful day.
The only bad thing was, I felt so sorry for those bitches that are a slave to the nic bitch as we say. I saw for the first time how much you really miss out on when you spend so much time worrying about your "drug". I felt sorry for the children, just wanting to play ball with dad, too bad he couldn't give 100% because he had a butt hanging off his lip that he didn't want to drop, or that he was hanging on to the pack for dear life as not to get it wet.
As I said, you really want to know what freedom is? Quit nicotine, quit the cigs, quit dip, let it go, your life without it is so much more wonderful and full of enjoyment.
Last but not least, Loot I believe you owe franpro $5.
I Quit! I don't do that anymore and I have no desire to ever again. Not after this weekend.
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Nice read Turkey, I think it will be great inspiration for those new to the quit and it is a good reminder to those of us who are a little farther along in our quits. Thanks for sharing.
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Is this your HOF speech? If so wrong forum 'na na'
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No, this is not my HOF speech. It is an experience I had that I am sharing with everyone. I am fully aware of where HOF speeches go and when I am ready to write one I will. Thanks for your concern
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No, this is not my HOF speech. It is an experience I had that I am sharing with everyone. I am fully aware of where HOF speeches go and when I am ready to write one I will. Thanks for your concern
Yours will be a winner when you do write it i'm sure. I can hardly wait to read it.
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The Ultimate Goal
I'm thinking of the Celtics tonight, hard not to, they're all over the news here in Massachusetts. Maybe everywhere, who the hell knows. Wondering how many of those players right now, tonight, are thinking about reaching that ultimate goal. Today is June 14th 2008. Tomorrow is not only Father's Day, but possibly the day a group of guys with a common goal reach the pinnacle of success in what they do, play basketball.
Professional athletes are the easiest to use as examples. We often here of them reaching that ultimate goal. Whether it be as a team or as a individual player. The ultimate goal, winning the super bowl, world series, NBA championship, MLB championship, Tour de France, Daytona 500, Indianapolis 500, Shit even horses can reach their ultimate goal of winning the Kentucky Derby. I think by now you understand what I mean by ultimate goal. You've reached the highest point in the journey, you came out on top, there is no next step. Your the best the greatest at what you do.
Very important for you brothers/sisters thinking about or in the process of quitting to realize one important thing. Your not ready to think about the ultimate goal. You have practicing to do. Think of it as starting out in Tee Ball. Dream about someday winning that Super Bowl or MLB, NBA, NHL championship. Hard work and practice is what makes you a champion. Everyone that has come out on top has never said it was a cake walk. Neither is quitting tobacco.
Day 100, nice accomplishment, tremendous, but not the ultimate goal. I think of it as draft day. You played farm leage, church league, little league, highschool and college. Yes! your drafted, WOOOOOHOOOOOO! time to celebrate. Shit! Then you realize something. Time to start all over. You reached one goal of making it in the big leagues, now you have to work hard, practice, refine your skills and prepare yourself to reach that ultimate goal.
I challenge everyone that is 100+ days to join me in the fight for the ultimate goal of never again. If you think about it, it's pretty simple actually. No tobacco until the day you die. After you die I don't give a shit what you do. Retire I suppose. Seriousley you reached 100 days quit, now what? Whats your motivation? Whats keeping you going? I'll tell you whats keeping me going. I want that ultimate goal. I can't win any great championship, I will never win a super bowl, I will never hold the stanly cup, I will never be inducted inot the Hall of Fame. BUT!!
What I have learned about myself these last 100 days, I know for a fact that I can Quit chewing tobacco, and I don't smoke, for the reast of my life. I'm a professional quitter now. Nothing will get in my way of coming out on top a quitting champion. I am 30 and hopefully have a long career ahead. I have some of the best team mates a guy could ask for. I ask that I don't be traded or put on free agency.
I don't do that anymore and I have no desire to ever again.
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You did not stumble onto this website by accident my friend. You are here because deep down you want to quit using tobacco. Am I right?
Oh! your here because you had another one of those dip related fights with your wife. Which one of the hundred dip related fights did you have? Did you drop your spitter and stain the carpet? You dropped one in the car while driving and now your console is all sticky and smells like ass. Oh, the big one. You promised to quit for (enter reason to quit here) and that has come and gone and your still piling that shit into your face.
Is it possible that you stumbled onto this website late at night because you are scared shittless right now? You haven't told anyone yet but your gums really hurt and you have one of those white patches on the inside of your lip. All you can think about right now is your wife and kids sleeping quietly as you feverishly look for help and answers. Imagine what it would be like having to tell them that you have to cut your face off because cancer is eating it away.
Let me tell you something. I was that guy. Promises to the wife came and fell to the curb side. Fights over me having what she called "shit in your mouth." The car was disgusting, stains and flakes all over the place. Believe it or not I was neglecting my daughter. Think about it. Have you ever chose dip over your child? Think really hard. You may not like to admit it. When my wife worked nights I would put my daughter to bed no later than 7. Why? Because I needed a fucking dip. I thought I was doing the right thing by not dipping around her. Wrong!!! I still have not forgave myself for that selfish act.
Sound familiar? It should, everyone of the thousands of quitters on this site has the same story. Started when we were young and stupid, grew up and realized how stupid we really were. We have no shame in asking for help when we need it. We lean on each other when necessary. The only people that know what you are feeling and what you are going through are all right here, on this site.
I won't tell you to quit, that doesn't work. Family and friends told me to quit for years. You have to tell yourself you want to be quit. Do you know what freedom is? I can't tell you but, I can show you if you join this site and quit using that crap you put in your mouth.
Honestly what do you have to lose? This site is free, it will cost you nothing to join. Come join us quitters. I promise you won't regret it.
https://www.killthecan.org/youre-not-here-by-accident/
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This is my opinion:
In order for you to have a successful quit you need to ask yourself these questions. Why did I chew/dip? What was the gratification I got from it? Each day, what prompted me to put that shit in my lip? Why?
I have been quit now for 144 days and it seems that I am finally being able to answer all those questions. Why did I chew/dip? The answer surprised myself. I was alone. I believe, deep down, that is the reason why I chewed.
The answer came to me when I looked back at when I started and the events that lead up to me becoming an addict.
I chewed on and off in high school and college. Would buy a tin for that camping trip. A night out with the buddies, etc... Never woke up to a dip, nor did I ever have the feeling that I needed one right then and there.
I started chewing then dipping when I left my home town at the age of 20. I moved 350 miles away from family and all my friends. I had to start my life all over not knowing anyone. But, I knew Redman Chew and Skoal Mint. I believe those two became my comfort blanket, I could find them anywhere I went. I traveled parts of the U.S. alone, instead of a dog to keep me company I had dip/chew.
I believe I have been successful in my quit because I knew what my triggers were. I knew how to handle them and avoid them if needed. I now know why in the first place that I felt I needed dip/chew. I'm successful because I understand why I was an addict and why I no longer need dip/chew.
Where am I going with this?
I have to go on a business trip for almost 3 weeks. Alone, without the family. Not knowing anyone I will be there with. I leave August 10th. Yes, I will admit that I am a little scared of what I may do. How I may handle being alone again. It will be very easy to have a dip without anyone ever knowing it.
What's great about this site is, I shouldn't ever feel alone. I have numbers and I will have a computer. I'm counting on this website and everyone here to get me trough 3 weeks. I quote, "Stay Strong, Stay Close, Stay Quit." Thanks Visa
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Today was my wife's first ultrasound. She is 8 weeks pregnant with our second child. Everything looks good. According to the Chinese birth chart it most likely will be a boy. We'll see. There needs to be a little Turkey running around.
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Today was my wife's first ultrasound. She is 8 weeks pregnant with our second child. Everything looks good. According to the Chinese birth chart it most likely will be a boy. We'll see. There needs to be a little Turkey running around.
congratulations my friend! that's awesome news!
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Today was my wife's first ultrasound. She is 8 weeks pregnant with our second child. Everything looks good. According to the Chinese birth chart it most likely will be a boy. We'll see. There needs to be a little Turkey running around.
Congratulations on your second child!
Think of the good example you are for your kids. Their Dad is a stud that can overcome whatever adversity he is facing. And now you will teach them how to do the same throughout their lives, no matter the obstacle. I can't think of anything more important or rewarding. Every child deserves it, but yours will have it.
Any fool with a dick can make a baby, but only a real man can raise his children. - Furious Styles (Boyz in the Hood)
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I thought being a Dad with dip was the best a guy could ask for. I was wrong. Being a Dad dip free is the best damn thing any man could ask for.