KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: sulli02 on June 30, 2013, 10:40:00 AM
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Hey team, this is my first post to the site. I am 34 years old and have dipped since I was 15 (and a can a day for the last 10+ years). I recently decided to quit cold turkey and I am on day 2. I feel ok but have waves where I feel out of it, have no sense of humor, and feel lethargic. When can I expect to feel a little better? Right now, I feel like I will never feel good.
I am also going to the beach with my girlfriend's family on Wednesday (day 5 of my quit) and I'm nervous that I will not be feeling better at that point and might have a short fuse. With the nicotine out of my system, shouldn't I feel better at that point?
Really appreciate the support, fellas.
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Hey team, this is my first post to the site. I am 34 years old and have dipped since I was 15 (and a can a day for the last 10+ years). I recently decided to quit cold turkey and I am on day 2. I feel ok but have waves where I feel out of it, have no sense of humor, and feel lethargic. When can I expect to feel a little better? Right now, I feel like I will never feel good.
I am also going to the beach with my girlfriend's family on Wednesday (day 5 of my quit) and I'm nervous that I will not be feeling better at that point and might have a short fuse. With the nicotine out of my system, shouldn't I feel better at that point?
Really appreciate the support, fellas.
Welcome.
By day 5 the NIC will be out of your blood and it is just mind-games after that. She will whisper all sorts of shit to you at the beach, in the car, on the shitter, etc. Recongize it for what it is, your brain beginning to re-wire itself correctly, and enjoy the beach. But don't be stupid, bring seeds, gum, cady, whatever you may need to fight the craves.
Dip doesn't help stress, it adds to it.
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Thanks, Evil_Won. I am just trying to get a sense for how I will feel days 1-4 versus days 5+. I am sure that everyone is different, but I guess I just want to know that I will eventually laugh again and be able to concentrate and have fun. Feel pretty terrible right now but going to the gym. Hopefully will feel better tonight.
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Thanks, Evil_Won. I am just trying to get a sense for how I will feel days 1-4 versus days 5+. I am sure that everyone is different, but I guess I just want to know that I will eventually laugh again and be able to concentrate and have fun. Feel pretty terrible right now but going to the gym. Hopefully will feel better tonight.
It is different for everyone. The craves end, or at least lesson, at different times for different folks. For me, 264 days in, I still think about dip at least 10 times a day. On the plus side, the urge to act on those craves is nearly gone.
My best advice is to stick to this site. Read everything you can, especially Introductions and HOF speeches, and to get involved. Send out some PMs to other new quitters in your group. Offer your phone number and I bet you get some in return. You are in the same group and going through the same nic withdrawl effects together. Lean on each other and help each other.
Post roll early and keep your word to not use today. Repeat tomorrow when tomorrow comes.
The friendships formed on this site are the site largest reason I have remained quit. I don't want to fuck that up.
Check your Indox (1)
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Hey sulli, welcome to the site and congrats on your decision to quit.
You dipped for roughly 19 years if I read your intro right. That's about 6935 days. You have only been quit for 2. BE PATIENT. That's a lot of damage to undo. It takes 3 days just for the nicotine to leave your system. It can take close to 3 weeks to get the rest of the chemicals in chew out of your body.
In the short term things will be uncomfortable. Exercise, keeping blood sugar steady,and cutting back caffeine will help you tremendously. Your literally saving your own life so priority one is your quit. Guard it well.
This is going to suck until it doesn't, just keep adding up days and ride it out. It gets so so so much better you can't imagine. It's worth it.
sM - 1614
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Skoal Monster, got a good laugh out of your post. I needed that - thanks, and good point. Hard to believe I dipped for 19 years. I know I can do this and I am 100% committed. I guess I just wanted to hear that it would get better, that i won't feel this tension in my chest for the rest of my life. Is it really true that cutting back on caffeine will help? I just had a monster energy drink and it actually made me feel better and raised my spirits a little. Thank you again for the help- glad to know that i am not alone. Ready to call day 2 to a close and get amped up for day 3.
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Skoal Monster, got a good laugh out of your post. I needed that - thanks, and good point. Hard to believe I dipped for 19 years. I know I can do this and I am 100% committed. I guess I just wanted to hear that it would get better, that i won't feel this tension in my chest for the rest of my life. Is it really true that cutting back on caffeine will help? I just had a monster energy drink and it actually made me feel better and raised my spirits a little. Thank you again for the help- glad to know that i am not alone. Ready to call day 2 to a close and get amped up for day 3.
Again congrats on quitting! I'm on day 62 and just really began to feel better after day 30 and still have some moments even now, but better with every passing day. Take it day by day and instead of dreading the pain, embrace it. You will one day soon enjoy remembering how hard it was and how you are such a bad ass for pressing through it. Make sure every one with you is aware of what you are going thru so they will understand your odd behavior on the trip. Did you post roll? I could find your post. If not get that done, we will quit with you!
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Skoal Monster, got a good laugh out of your post. I needed that - thanks, and good point. Hard to believe I dipped for 19 years. I know I can do this and I am 100% committed. I guess I just wanted to hear that it would get better, that i won't feel this tension in my chest for the rest of my life. Is it really true that cutting back on caffeine will help? I just had a monster energy drink and it actually made me feel better and raised my spirits a little. Thank you again for the help- glad to know that i am not alone. Ready to call day 2 to a close and get amped up for day 3.
What you need to know is this... it WILL get better. It won't always be easy but it will be worth it. Each day removed from nicotine will bring something new. Sometimes good, sometimes a pain in the ass. You have a lot of days of abuse you put your body through. Gonna take awhile. At some point... I wish I could tell you when... you'll reach this pivot point and start having more good things happen than bad. THAT'S the good stuff man! Freedom is so damn cool. Welcome to it.
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Thank you for the responses. Day 3 is done...successfully. Almost had a nervous breakdown at about 3pm but made it through. Got home from work at 8pm and went for a run - sweated more than i ever have in my entire life, not sure if that is normal - but feeling ok. Definitely will make it through the day nicotine free and hoping to see/feel a little better tomorrow. Today was pretty awful, ready for it to get at least slightly better. Will definitely post roll tomorrow morning. thank you again for all of the support. This group is a lifesaver.
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You are through the worst of it. I was a dipper for 20+ years and had a 2 can a day habit for the last 5-10 years. I am now 35 days quit, and am enjoying crave free days. Keep pushing your quit until it gets better! I might have some bad days ahead of me, but addicts and non-addicts alike have that so who cares. You might be helped by building your hatred for being a slave to your addiction, and the lies of the nic bitch and UST. The vets who have posted on your intro speak truth and wisdom. Read as much on this forum as you can get because there is so much wisdom here... You can do this, and honestly there is no excuse to cave at this point: if you can quit for the first 3 days you can quit every day! Just remember you are an addict and if you have nic again it will all start over again... PM me if you need to.
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Thank you for the responses. Day 3 is done...successfully. Almost had a nervous breakdown at about 3pm but made it through. Got home from work at 8pm and went for a run - sweated more than i ever have in my entire life, not sure if that is normal - but feeling ok. Definitely will make it through the day nicotine free and hoping to see/feel a little better tomorrow. Today was pretty awful, ready for it to get at least slightly better. Will definitely post roll tomorrow morning. thank you again for all of the support. This group is a lifesaver.
Sound like a young ME. It gets better, trust me. If I didn't I'd tell you.
Gonna be tough for awhile though. Gonna have some ups and some downs.
We fucked our brain up for YEARS. Hell I just read and article today about how tobacco is 90% GMO's. So we got that going for us too.
As a pussy who never thought I would feel "normal" again, my best advice is this, and I've said it before but it really helped me.
You have to think of this as a small window of shittiness in your life. I know that right now it fucking SUCKS and you feel like ripping your dick off. But you won't feel like this forever. This is just a small snapshot of ass juice in your overall picture of life.
This snapshot will suck, and like a fat kid with braces in 5th grade,who turned out to be an Adonis, you won't want to look back at it too often or if you do you will laugh, but it is what it is...simply a picture of you when you were at a low point. That Adonis didn't end up looking like that forever and you won't feel like this forever.
You're doing this for a reason. You've had enough. We all did.
For the last 19 years you haven't been "you". You didn't come into this world with a mouth full of tobacco. At age 15 you said goodbye to the real you and hello to the nicotine dependant you.
Finding the real you is tough sometimes, trust me. I'm almost 400 days quit and still discovering new things. Read my intro if you've got 5 hours of nothing to do. Also read my "tend your garden" in words of wisdom. Not trying to boast but I think you can relate.
Do I feel better than day 3, day 30, or day 333? You bet your fucking ass I do. Nobody should be a slave dependant on a poisonous drug. Nobody!!!
But...we were and it wired our brain in a fucked up way. Now we have to rewire the mother fuckers and it cab be a pain in the ass at times. But worth it.
Grind it out bro. Minute by minute if you have to. You need help, have some questions, want to tell me to fuck off, want to cry, want to rant, want to do anything...come here. We will listen and help.
We want to see you quit and cheer you on as your turn this feeling of shit into one of pride and freedom, as you get back to being YOU for the first time before you could DRIVE.
Its a beautiful thing and well worth the fight .
You got this. Hit me up if you ever need anything.
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Congrats on getting through day 3. I'm on day 10 and it is a million times easier than days 2,3,4,5. I was a serial caver, though, and have gone through far too many days 1-4. My point is, you're through the worst of it but be on the lookout for the "just one chew" mindfuck that is going on in your head, rationalizing why you should have one.
It is about to get easier. Keep going. Reading a lot on KTC has helped me.
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Remember the last 19 years were the shitty years- a slave- a tobacco whore- Now is the best part of your life- freedom.
One thing that has helped me the most in my quit is not allowing myself to romanticize chewing/dipping- it never heightened the experience if anything it detracted from it, at best is was neutral to it. It wasn't even a crutch- it was a royal pain in the ass- and I am glad to be FREE-
Enjoy your freedom, revel in it, romanticize it, live it every-damn-day.
Glad to be quit with you today!
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Shit, this was the hardest day yet. I was so close to fist fighting multiple people all day. Someone pissed me off at work - in an office building, mind you - and I told them that "I hope you fucking die." I literally thought i might have a heart attack all day. I sincerely appreciate the encouragement, but please, sweet baby jesus, make tomorrow easier.
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Shit, this was the hardest day yet. I was so close to fist fighting multiple people all day. Someone pissed me off at work - in an office building, mind you - and I told them that "I hope you fucking die." I literally thought i might have a heart attack all day. I sincerely appreciate the encouragement, but please, sweet baby jesus, make tomorrow easier.
Now... Don't pull sweet baby Jesus in on this. It's not his fault :)
Listen man... It sucks and it sucks hard. As masochistic as it sounds, you do NOT want this to be easy in any way! It will get better by and by. When it does get better... You need to remember how godawful nasty the beginning of your quit was. You NEVER want to put yourself in a position to have to go through this hell again. Embrace this, ENJOY this! You are healing brother. You are on your way to freedom and... Freedom is so damn cool. Quit on!
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Shit, this was the hardest day yet. I was so close to fist fighting multiple people all day. Someone pissed me off at work - in an office building, mind you - and I told them that "I hope you fucking die." I literally thought i might have a heart attack all day. I sincerely appreciate the encouragement, but please, sweet baby jesus, make tomorrow easier.
Now... Don't pull sweet baby Jesus in on this. It's not his fault :)
Listen man... It sucks and it sucks hard. As masochistic as it sounds, you do NOT want this to be easy in any way! It will get better by and by. When it does get better... You need to remember how godawful nasty the beginning of your quit was. You NEVER want to put yourself in a position to have to go through this hell again. Embrace this, ENJOY this! You are healing brother. You are on your way to freedom and... Freedom is so damn cool. Quit on!
Fences can be mended. Your word cannot.
You got anger issues come on in here and yell at once of us knuckleheads. Shit. I love to cuss. I'm a fucking human resources nightmare.
This will all pass. You will get your balance back.
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You have my word, I will not ever dip again, no matter how angry I get. I promise - I will not use tobacco.
One quick question for everyone - I know everyone says it is better to not consume alcohol during the first few weeks, but in my 19 years of dipping, alcohol never made me want to dip more. Quite the opposite. I came home tonight and my nerves were all fucked up, so I took a shot of maker's mark and I felt 100x better. I have never been a big drinker, but is taking a shot of alcohol only prolonging the pain, or is it similar to eating seeds (which I have been eating like crazy)?
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You have my word, I will not ever dip again, no matter how angry I get. I promise - I will not use tobacco.
One quick question for everyone - I know everyone says it is better to not consume alcohol during the first few weeks, but in my 19 years of dipping, alcohol never made me want to dip more. Quite the opposite. I came home tonight and my nerves were all fucked up, so I took a shot of maker's mark and I felt 100x better. I have never been a big drinker, but is taking a shot of alcohol only prolonging the pain, or is it similar to eating seeds (which I have been eating like crazy)?
For most, alcohol lowers inhibitions and leads one to a "fuck it" attitude (main reason I got laid in college) , which is why it's such a quit killer.
If a shot of makers mark helped, then that could be a good thing, but be warned not to go overboard. I once fucked a really fat chick because I went overboard with some mad dog 20/20.
Do whatever it takes to keep that nasty shit out your lip. Stick a dildo in your cakehole if you must. We wont judge.
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To anyone who has made it a year being quit - just curious, I would like to know what it is like after being quit for a year? Do you still have fog or craves? And if you have craves, how often?
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To anyone who has made it a year being quit - just curious, I would like to know what it is like after being quit for a year? Do you still have fog or craves? And if you have craves, how often?
Sulli, I've been quit for 376 days and feel great. The craves still come infrequently but are not nearly as difficult as the early days and the fog lifted for me right before my HOF. It does get better. Pm if you need a number for when it gets tough or if you have other questions.
Ben
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To anyone who has made it a year being quit - just curious, I would like to know what it is like after being quit for a year? Do you still have fog or craves? And if you have craves, how often?
Sulli, I've been quit for 376 days and feel great. The craves still come infrequently but are not nearly as difficult as the early days and the fog lifted for me right before my HOF. It does get better. Pm if you need a number for when it gets tough or if you have other questions.
Ben
First, I see you have 29 posts, so I assume you are early on.
Be patient. Thinking about a year from now is, I think, premature. Think about today. Today is doable.
But I think I understand why you are asking. I think you're looking for some motivation and some reassurance that all this shit is worth it.
It is.
And then some!
A year, two years, now three years + since I've given up on that bitch, and things are so fucking awesome it's not even funny.
I crave sometimes, but VERY rarely. I have had a dip dream or two. But being able to deal with stress, life, trauma, excitement, celebrations - is so much easier without that bitch!
It gets easier.
It is SO worth it.
Never again.
For any reason.
Stay strong.
Stay Quit.
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To anyone who has made it a year being quit - just curious, I would like to know what it is like after being quit for a year? Do you still have fog or craves? And if you have craves, how often?
Sulli, I've been quit for 376 days and feel great. The craves still come infrequently but are not nearly as difficult as the early days and the fog lifted for me right before my HOF. It does get better. Pm if you need a number for when it gets tough or if you have other questions.
Ben
I'm not a year yet, 300 today, but still have craves daily. That's ok, because the urge to act on the craves is nearly gone most days. Instead of getting freaked out, sweating, and stuffing alternatives into my face like gum, seeds, and candy I just say "I'm quit. I posted roll. I gave my word and that is golden. Just one is not an option today."
A crave reminds me that I'm still an addict and can't stop fighting for even one day. If I crave every day for the rest of my life I'm ok with that. I never want to forget day 1 and that I'm an addict.
Focus on today but know that is gets better...way better.
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Day 1056 - Absolutely no fog since the first few months of my quit. Very, very rarely have a true crave. If a "crave" does come along, it's different now. It's more of a brief recollection: "There was a time when I'd be dipping right now.", and only lasts a few seconds before it is swept aside. For me, the door slammed shut somewhere around 175 days. I knew right then that I was done for good. Dip dreams have subsided too; hadn't had one of those in almost a year until last month sometime. Life is absolutely superb!
So..... why am I still here?
1. Because I've seen seasoned quitters cave.
2. Posting roll only takes a few seconds.
3. To pay forward the support that was given to me.
4. I have made good friends here.
But, you know what...... none of that matters if you take it one day at a time.
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To anyone who has made it a year being quit - just curious, I would like to know what it is like after being quit for a year? Do you still have fog or craves? And if you have craves, how often?
Sulli, I've been quit for 376 days and feel great. The craves still come infrequently but are not nearly as difficult as the early days and the fog lifted for me right before my HOF. It does get better. Pm if you need a number for when it gets tough or if you have other questions.
Ben
Sulli-
Every quitter is a little different, some still have major craves well into their quit. But it does get way better as you get farther out. For me I haven't had any craves or fog for a long time, but I still get the occasional whisper "You can have just one" or "you are awesome, let's celebrate!" The whispers are easy for me to discount, it is simply not an option for me to return to chewing and I post roll to let you all know it is off the table today....
Remember how you felt when you first decided to quit. Remember the fog, the suck, the craves. Use them to fuel your quit...
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To anyone who has made it a year being quit - just curious, I would like to know what it is like after being quit for a year? Do you still have fog or craves? And if you have craves, how often?
Sulli, I've been quit for 376 days and feel great. The craves still come infrequently but are not nearly as difficult as the early days and the fog lifted for me right before my HOF. It does get better. Pm if you need a number for when it gets tough or if you have other questions.
Ben
Sulli-
Every quitter is a little different, some still have major craves well into their quit. But it does get way better as you get farther out. For me I haven't had any craves or fog for a long time, but I still get the occasional whisper "You can have just one" or "you are awesome, let's celebrate!" The whispers are easy for me to discount, it is simply not an option for me to return to chewing and I post roll to let you all know it is off the table today....
Remember how you felt when you first decided to quit. Remember the fog, the suck, the craves. Use them to fuel your quit...
I'm on 172 and can totally get what radmen wrote. Something has definitely changed in me from hof until now. I feel like the door has shut and the poison is locked outside. The only way it gets in is if i unlock the deadbolts. Then i have to move the guard dogs out of the way.
Being quit is totally up to me. I hardly crave at all. Occasionally, but its easily dismissed.
I'm loving my new life. I got here one day at a time, posting roll and keeping my word. Its worked so far and I'm A firm believer that you don't fix what isn't broken.
One day at a time and you can take back a lot of what the poison has stolen. Never again for any reason and you can keep it. Quit with you....
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To anyone who has made it a year being quit - just curious, I would like to know what it is like after being quit for a year? Do you still have fog or craves? And if you have craves, how often?
Sulli, I've been quit for 376 days and feel great. The craves still come infrequently but are not nearly as difficult as the early days and the fog lifted for me right before my HOF. It does get better. Pm if you need a number for when it gets tough or if you have other questions.
Ben
Sulli-
Every quitter is a little different, some still have major craves well into their quit. But it does get way better as you get farther out. For me I haven't had any craves or fog for a long time, but I still get the occasional whisper "You can have just one" or "you are awesome, let's celebrate!" The whispers are easy for me to discount, it is simply not an option for me to return to chewing and I post roll to let you all know it is off the table today....
Remember how you felt when you first decided to quit. Remember the fog, the suck, the craves. Use them to fuel your quit...
I'm on 172 and can totally get what radmen wrote. Something has definitely changed in me from hof until now. I feel like the door has shut and the poison is locked outside. The only way it gets in is if i unlock the deadbolts. Then i have to move the guard dogs out of the way.
Being quit is totally up to me. I hardly crave at all. Occasionally, but its easily dismissed.
I'm loving my new life. I got here one day at a time, posting roll and keeping my word. Its worked so far and I'm A firm believer that you don't fix what isn't broken.
One day at a time and you can take back a lot of what the poison has stolen. Never again for any reason and you can keep it. Quit with you....
1653- I dont even remember what a crave feels like. It's worth it.
It's going to suck until it doesn't. then it won't. When it doesn't it will be worth it.
I promise.
sM
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To anyone who has made it a year being quit - just curious, I would like to know what it is like after being quit for a year? Do you still have fog or craves? And if you have craves, how often?
Sulli, I've been quit for 376 days and feel great. The craves still come infrequently but are not nearly as difficult as the early days and the fog lifted for me right before my HOF. It does get better. Pm if you need a number for when it gets tough or if you have other questions.
Ben
Sulli-
Every quitter is a little different, some still have major craves well into their quit. But it does get way better as you get farther out. For me I haven't had any craves or fog for a long time, but I still get the occasional whisper "You can have just one" or "you are awesome, let's celebrate!" The whispers are easy for me to discount, it is simply not an option for me to return to chewing and I post roll to let you all know it is off the table today....
Remember how you felt when you first decided to quit. Remember the fog, the suck, the craves. Use them to fuel your quit...
I'm on 172 and can totally get what radmen wrote. Something has definitely changed in me from hof until now. I feel like the door has shut and the poison is locked outside. The only way it gets in is if i unlock the deadbolts. Then i have to move the guard dogs out of the way.
Being quit is totally up to me. I hardly crave at all. Occasionally, but its easily dismissed.
I'm loving my new life. I got here one day at a time, posting roll and keeping my word. Its worked so far and I'm A firm believer that you don't fix what isn't broken.
One day at a time and you can take back a lot of what the poison has stolen. Never again for any reason and you can keep it. Quit with you....
1653- I dont even remember what a crave feels like. It's worth it.
It's going to suck until it doesn't. then it won't. When it doesn't it will be worth it.
I promise.
sM
Boy this is so encouraging!
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I once fucked a really fat chick because I went overboard with some mad dog 20/20.
'crackup'
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Day 1056 - Absolutely no fog since the first few months of my quit. Very, very rarely have a true crave. If a "crave" does come along, it's different now. It's more of a brief recollection: "There was a time when I'd be dipping right now.", and only lasts a few seconds before it is swept aside. For me, the door slammed shut somewhere around 175 days. I knew right then that I was done for good. Dip dreams have subsided too; hadn't had one of those in almost a year until last month sometime. Life is absolutely superb!
So..... why am I still here?
1. Because I've seen seasoned quitters cave.
2. Posting roll only takes a few seconds.
3. To pay forward the support that was given to me.
4. I have made good friends here.
But, you know what...... none of that matters if you take it one day at a time.
Bumping this up- EDD
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Welcome to the HOF brother. Nice job!!