KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Rufus on March 04, 2013, 10:48:00 PM
-
Hello all,
My name is Casey, and I'm 19 years old from Tennessee. Growing up, my dad was never without a can of skoal. Throughout high school, all the football coaches did it. My friends did it. I did it. Nothing was abnormal about it... In fact, it would have been abnormal had I NOT been a dipper.
Picked it up for the first time at the ripe age of 13. I was steady dipping by 14. Got many lectures and disapprovals from my parents about it, but the hypocrisy was unnerving. My mom smokes a pack of marlboros a day and as I mentioned previously, my dad was just the pot calling the kettle black.
I understood that they wanted better for me. I also understood that they knew it was bad if they themselves were slaves to their own vices.
What I didn't understand was the real reasoning behind their concerns: my parents know what it's like to be completely dependent on tobacco, unable to quit by their own free wills.
So after dipping a can of Copenhagen long cut a day for over four years, I finally decided to quit. I was at the house this past Sunday night when I realized that I needed to run out and buy a can. Laying in bed, 11 PM, not even dressed, this would have ordinarily rendered an emergency that would require me to get up, get dressed, and drive five miles to the nearest open market just for my fix.
For some reason, I decided it could wait until morning. My first win.
The next day, I woke up cranky and irritable. My bed was a haven of warmth that I was not eager to leave. I got up twenty minutes later than I had hoped. Speedily showering and throwing clothes on, I ran out and fired up the Dodge, reaching for the familiar can in the console, when I remembered my predicament. Facing the option of stopping for a can or being late for work, I opted for the latter. Win number two.
Upon arriving at work, just barely punching in on time, I went looking for a coworker of mine who shared with me the common bond of being a submissive tobacco user. I was soon informed that he had called out sick.... Fate was on my side, but I didn't realize it yet.
I made it, albeit crankily, all the way to lunch, when I couldn't make it to the store quickly enough. When I went in and was greeted by the familiar clerk, I immediately spouted out the order, which probably came across as rather rude, "Two cans of cope long cut." He turned around searching for it, and as fate would have it, they were completely out of my dip of choice. Not a roll under the counter, not a single can in a box, just out. I was so frustrated at this point that I took personal offense when he offered me a can of grizzly. Always nice to this poor guy, he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.
"No, I don't want that shit."
As soon as the words left my mouth, I apologized for my rash behavior. It was then that I realized: I hadn't gone this long without a fix since junior high. Twelve hours without nicotine and I almost grabbed a gas station clerk by the throat for simply trying to help me.
At that point, I decided I was done. I apologized to the guy a few more times and saw a special behind the counter, "Electronic Cigarette, Disposable, $6.99" so I bought one. I've never been a smoker, but I had tried these things before and they weren't half bad.
Since then, I have burned through about twelve of those little e-cigarettes, every time I wanted a dip just taking a few puffs. They come in different nicotine varieties, so I started with the highest (18 mg) and I'm down to the 11. The plan is to be weened off completely in a month, and so far it is working okay.
The first few days were fine. Thursday was the easiest. The weekend, however, proved to be a challenge. My buddies all made fun of my little vapor device as they spat into their bottles and dipped merrily. It was hard, but I knew I had to cope (no pun intended).
Funny thing is, I started to realize how gross dipping really is. I completely threw away anything dip related, including my impressive collection of over 1000 cans. I threw away my mudjug, my copenhagen tin sign, everything. I cleaned out my truck of any cans, and since I haven't had a spit bottle sitting in there day in and day out, the interior actually smells better.
My girlfriend has noticed too. My hands are warmer and my breath smells better. We both like that :P
Bottom line, I'm excited about this journey. I've heard the first 100 days are the worst, so we'll see. It's hard, as I work in a field where I am constantly on jobs surrounded by other people who are dipping and smoking constantly. I'm only just now realizing, however, that I never want to be that guy again.
-
Rufus, this is a no nicotine site. No dipping, no snus, no cigs, no cigars, and no e-cigs either. The best way to get over your addiction is to get rid of all of it and hang on for the ride. Planned quits don't work plain and simple. Quit being nics bitch and come drink the koolaid with us. When you are clean post up a day 1 and you will get all the support you can ever imagine. Until then- you are on your own.
-
Great job on taking your life back, Rufus. While it may suck big time right now, it will get better. A lot better. My first month was terrible and since then its gotten completely better each and every day. Even with my cravings, shitty days, annoyances, whatever you want to include in here I would never trade it in to go back to being nicotine's bitch. Go to the upper left corner and read all there is in the welcome center.
Go here index.php?showtopic=7913st=0 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=7913&st=0) and post roll with your quit brothers and sisters. In the welcome center link there is a link to teach you how to post roll correctly. Get involved with the site, post roll. Leave a message in your quit group asking for phone numbers. They will come mightily in hand when shit hits the fan and you are feeling like caving.
As JB said, this a completely non nicotine site. Get rid of the e-cig, any spare tins you might have. Pick up Smokey Mountain or Hooch or any other fake dip. Or if you don't want to use that then some sunflower seeds or jolly ranchers or anything. Make sure to drink a ton of water. We've all done and you sure as shit too. Don't let this 4 year habit turn into me and do it for 12 years or other people on this site who had dipped for longer than I've been alive(27 years).
Keep it up my brother. PM me if you have any questions or need to chat or something.
-
Rufus, this is a no nicotine site. No dipping, no snus, no cigs, no cigars, and no e-cigs either. The best way to get over your addiction is to get rid of all of it and hang on for the ride. Planned quits don't work plain and simple. Quit being nics bitch and come drink the koolaid with us. When you are clean post up a day 1 and you will get all the support you can ever imagine. Until then- you are on your own.
Rufus,
I have a great friend and colleague who is an opiate addict. He is over 4 years clean, but, his drug of choice was hydromorphone. As you may know, hydromorphone is 10 X more potent relative to morphine. Guess what? It didn't matter how he got it into his body, the effect was the same. Whether he went iv, nasal, inhaled, oral, rectal...whether he used morphine, oxycontin, herione, buprenorphine, hydro, opium...it was all the same opiate or close relative. He continued to feed his addiction. Maybe he felt better taking a pill vs shooting it into his vein, but, it was only a different delivery method.
You see the similarities? Nicotine is OUR herione. You must stop putting the poison in your body to be considered quit. You get the nuts to do that, then you get back in here. Emancipation is at your doorstep Rufus.
Vadge
-
Good work on deciding to quit dipping, now its time to take the next step and quit nicotine for real. In switching to e-cigs you havent quit anything, just shifted the source from copenhagen to the e-cig. When you truly decide to be nic free we will be here, and will give you all the support you want or need. Make the decision to drop nicotine in all forms and post roll. Join us man.
-
Join us Rufus. 278 days ago, after 32 years of being a slave to the bitch, I made the choice and have never looked back. It is awesome! The bad ass quitters on this site kicked my ass a few times and it was well worth it! Post Roll and let's get this thing started.
-
Don't dip your toe into the quit pool. Fucking drop the faggy E-cigarette and jump right in. Your just stringing yourself along with that thing, still getting your nic fix, just from another source.
You heard the first 100 days were the hardest, we'll see?
No "we'll see", they are. If it was easy people STILL would not quit. That's the bitch of addiction.
Normally people who are doing something "significant" or are really committed to a great cause, such as people who work out all the time, or people dedicated to being in tip top shape, rally around the "If it were easy, everyone would do it" motto. And I believe that to be true, as I am not in tip top shape because...it aint fucking easy.
Even if quitting chew were easy, people still wouldn't quit because, well...they are fucking addicted to it.
Bad news is, it isn't easy. It's fucking hard. You need some real BALLS to quit...and support. You provide the balls and we provide the support.
Walking around puffing on a mechanical cigarette or whatever the fuck that thing is is weak. Your balls are about 1cm in diameter. Take that and your idiotic "mudjug", and your 1,000 cans of cope and take a big shit on them all, douse them with gasoline, strike a match, throw it on the huge pile of SHIT and watch it BURN.
You don't need that shit. You never did. Take your freedom back, take your life back. We will help you.
-
Can a day for over 20 Years..Join me us in our continued quits!
-
You have not quit my friend until you do not use the nic whore at all you are not quit. Put the shit down and walk away it will not be easy or fun. I will not candy coat this for you this is pure on suck. When you really quit we will support you until then grow a pair and walk away.
dkite
-
Don't dip your toe into the quit pool. Fucking drop the faggy E-cigarette and jump right in. Your just stringing yourself along with that thing, still getting your nic fix, just from another source.
You heard the first 100 days were the hardest, we'll see?
No "we'll see", they are. If it was easy people STILL would not quit. That's the bitch of addiction.
Normally people who are doing something "significant" or are really committed to a great cause, such as people who work out all the time, or people dedicated to being in tip top shape, rally around the "If it were easy, everyone would do it" motto. And I believe that to be true, as I am not in tip top shape because...it aint fucking easy.
Even if quitting chew were easy, people still wouldn't quit because, well...they are fucking addicted to it.
Bad news is, it isn't easy. It's fucking hard. You need some real BALLS to quit...and support. You provide the balls and we provide the support.
Walking around puffing on a mechanical cigarette or whatever the fuck that thing is is weak. Your balls are about 1cm in diameter. Take that and your idiotic "mudjug", and your 1,000 cans of cope and take a big shit on them all, douse them with gasoline, strike a match, throw it on the huge pile of SHIT and watch it BURN.
You don't need that shit. You never did. Take your freedom back, take your life back. We will help you.
I second what Diesel has expressed with great wisdom and clarity. If you are going to quit, then quit nicotine. No nicotine means just that. Please decide to save your life and sanity. Do this right! You will not be sorry!
-
Today is the day. I'm giving up two bitches.
This is going to sound made up, but I swear to god on my life that it's true.
Last night my girlfriend of two years dumped me. Without bitching about my problems, I'll just say it sucked.. I wanted so bad to buy a can on the way home. I didn't. Today has been my first day completely nic free.
And it has been one of the shittiest of my life.
But I'm sick of leaning on an addiction when things don't go right.
So screw copenhagen, screw nicotine, and screw her.
I'm taking me back.
I'll post roll tomorrow.
-
Today is the day. I'm giving up two bitches.
This is going to sound made up, but I swear to god on my life that it's true.
Last night my girlfriend of two years dumped me. Without bitching about my problems, I'll just say it sucked.. I wanted so bad to buy a can on the way home. I didn't. Today has been my first day completely nic free.
And it has been one of the shittiest of my life.
But I'm sick of leaning on an addiction when things don't go right.
So screw copenhagen, screw nicotine, and screw her.
I'm taking me back.
I'll post roll tomorrow.
You will be with the June 2013 quit group... my group. Post roll there.
I suggest you post early, I WILL be looking for your post!
Congrats on making the decision to take your life back. It has been a tough 12 days for me, but the decision to quit is the only one. Each day does get better so don't concern yourself with the future!
-
Get rid of that vapor thing unless you put oil in it, and make it 98 problems
-
Today is the day. I'm giving up two bitches.
This is going to sound made up, but I swear to god on my life that it's true.
Last night my girlfriend of two years dumped me. Without bitching about my problems, I'll just say it sucked.. I wanted so bad to buy a can on the way home. I didn't. Today has been my first day completely nic free.
And it has been one of the shittiest of my life.
But I'm sick of leaning on an addiction when things don't go right.
So screw copenhagen, screw nicotine, and screw her.
I'm taking me back.
I'll post roll tomorrow.
That a boy!!!! Let those balls flop in the wind. Feels good, don't it?!
-
Today is the day. I'm giving up two bitches.
This is going to sound made up, but I swear to god on my life that it's true.
Last night my girlfriend of two years dumped me. Without bitching about my problems, I'll just say it sucked.. I wanted so bad to buy a can on the way home. I didn't. Today has been my first day completely nic free.
And it has been one of the shittiest of my life.
But I'm sick of leaning on an addiction when things don't go right.
So screw copenhagen, screw nicotine, and screw her.
I'm taking me back.
I'll post roll tomorrow.
That a boy!!!! Let those balls flop in the wind. Feels good, don't it?!
Rufus I am 20 years old and we are going through the same shit. Just see my posts bitching about girls. It's not going to be easy but one thing to remember that dipping isn't going to solve shit.
It's not going to make you forget about your girlfriend or anything else.
I PMed you my number. Lets quit together!
-
Today is the day. I'm giving up two bitches.
This is going to sound made up, but I swear to god on my life that it's true.
Last night my girlfriend of two years dumped me. Without bitching about my problems, I'll just say it sucked.. I wanted so bad to buy a can on the way home. I didn't. Today has been my first day completely nic free.
And it has been one of the shittiest of my life.
But I'm sick of leaning on an addiction when things don't go right.
So screw copenhagen, screw nicotine, and screw her.
I'm taking me back.
I'll post roll tomorrow.
That a boy!!!! Let those balls flop in the wind. Feels good, don't it?!
Rufus I am 20 years old and we are going through the same shit. Just see my posts bitching about girls. It's not going to be easy but one thing to remember that dipping isn't going to solve shit.
It's not going to make you forget about your girlfriend or anything else.
I PMed you my number. Lets quit together!
He hasn't posted roll in three days. His last log in date was the 7th. When he comes crawling back, he will have some explaining to do.
-
That a boy there are those balls we were talking about. Here is some support keep going and keep quiting.
dkite