KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: DTG on February 03, 2010, 11:20:00 PM
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Hi all.
I was a dipper for 15 years, up to 2 cans/day of Copenhagen, and successfully quit in July of 1999. I even kept my last can, half-full, and decorated it as a memorial of my stupid "youth" (though I was 38 when I quit - not so young). I bragged how quitting was the hardest physical thing I had ever had to do, and it was.
So for some reason, I picked up a can in November of 2008. Nine years later. Can you believe that shit? I was under a lot of pressure at work, but that's no damn excuse. I can't explain the why of it... Why nine years later, I pick up a can and start dipping. Again. Dip is unbelivable, and it has no place at the corner store.
Of course, I say I'll keep it moderate, etc. Yeah...right. I'm back to a can a day by mid-2009. But now I have school-age kids, family responsibilities, career responsibilities, and this type of crap has no place for someone who wants to live a life. What if I get mouth cancer ? I have life insurance, but it's based on not using tobacco. I do public speaking in my job...how would that look with half of my face missing? Jesus Christ, dip is such an evil fucking thing. It's not only my life anymore...the life of my kids and wife will be destroyed by this shit.
So I quit...again...2 weeks ago. I embraced the withdrawal symptoms, and chose to enjoy them. I'm clean again. I guess at my age you can do that. I hope it's not too late. I have a sore tongue sometimes, and though I don't think it could be caused by only one year of dip use, I can not be sure at my age (47), given my history with tobacco nine years ago. If this one year of falling back into old habits triggers something that destroys my family, then I've let them down. And that will be worse than whatever surgery I have to undergo.
Young people on this board... you have all of the advantage of time and youth. Quit now, and you won't have life-changing issues to deal with in your 30's to 50's. Dip has absolutely no upside.
Derek
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9 years? 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' She never quits coming around after she gets her claws into you. Guess it doesn't matter how long it's been, we'll ALWAYS be addicts. I know without a doubt that I am one chew away from a two can a day habit. Thanks for the reminder, sorry you had to remember the hard way.
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9 years? 'bang head' 'bang head' 'bang head' She never quits coming around after she gets her claws into you. Guess it doesn't matter how long it's been, we'll ALWAYS be addicts. I know without a doubt that I am one chew away from a two can a day habit. Thanks for the reminder, sorry you had to remember the hard way.
The new quit groups could use your perspective Derek. And, believe it or not, you could use their help as well. I'm glad you quit for 9 years on your own, but become a part of this community and the quit will stick for life. Post up your days depending on your quit date. If you quit on 1/21 or earlier, post roll in the April 2010 group. Any later and you are in the May 2010 group. Glad to have you!
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Hi all.
I was a dipper for 15 years, up to 2 cans/day of Copenhagen, and successfully quit in July of 1999. I even kept my last can, half-full, and decorated it as a memorial of my stupid "youth" (though I was 38 when I quit - not so young). I bragged how quitting was the hardest physical thing I had ever had to do, and it was.
So for some reason, I picked up a can in November of 2008. Nine years later. Can you believe that shit? I was under a lot of pressure at work, but that's no damn excuse. I can't explain the why of it... Why nine years later, I pick up a can and start dipping. Again. Dip is unbelivable, and it has no place at the corner store.
Of course, I say I'll keep it moderate, etc. Yeah...right. I'm back to a can a day by mid-2009. But now I have school-age kids, family responsibilities, career responsibilities, and this type of crap has no place for someone who wants to live a life. What if I get mouth cancer ? I have life insurance, but it's based on not using tobacco. I do public speaking in my job...how would that look with half of my face missing? Jesus Christ, dip is such an evil fucking thing. It's not only my life anymore...the life of my kids and wife will be destroyed by this shit.
So I quit...again...2 weeks ago. I embraced the withdrawal symptoms, and chose to enjoy them. I'm clean again. I guess at my age you can do that. I hope it's not too late. I have a sore tongue sometimes, and though I don't think it could be caused by only one year of dip use, I can not be sure at my age (47), given my history with tobacco nine years ago. If this one year of falling back into old habits triggers something that destroys my family, then I've let them down. And that will be worse than whatever surgery I have to undergo.
Young people on this board... you have all of the advantage of time and youth. Quit now, and you won't have life-changing issues to deal with in your 30's to 50's. Dip has absolutely no upside.
Derek
I just LOVE this story. I know its a tragedy and all, but it reminds all of us of one of the most important lessons of this whole endeavor. It's this:
NIC ADDICTION IS PERMANENT.
Derek, Welcome to the rest of your life, bud. It's a far better place than the one from which you've come.