KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: SnuffCrutch on June 24, 2011, 01:28:00 AM
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Hey all!
New to the forum here. I tried my first dip when I was 17 years old and once I turned 18 I was chewing mostly skoal. The flavors changed over the years and eventually I started chewing Cope Wintergreen. I'm 23 now and I am very active in the outdoors.
I enjoy hunting and fishing, and always did both with a chew in. First thing I did in the morning was wake up, turn on the computer, get a coffee, and put a chew in. I'd have a chew in any time I was on the computer, any time I was fishing, hunting, ESPECIALLY DRIVING.
First thing I'd do when I got in the car was put a dip in. I have stains on my carpets in my car and my house from spilled chew bottles.
Two days ago I flossed my teeth and smelt some rotting stuff between two. It smelled terrible. I went into my bedroom and threw my can of snuff in the trash and said I'd quit.
Now, I've tried to hold off on the "urge" for thirty or forty minutes before in the past and found my jaw muscles tight, a headache from grinding my teeth, and more saliva in my mouth than I knew what to do with.
I had one dip in the morning then threw it out.. I made it all day without another one. In the evening I laid in bed and tossed and turned so I put a very small one in for ten minutes, brushed my teeth and fell asleep. Day two I woke up and had a coffee, but no snuff. I didn't have to work this day so I knew I'd have to keep myself occupied. Out in the garden (always used to have a snuff in for that)!
Feeding the animals (again, chewing!)
Alright I'll mow the grass (crap...)
For these reasons I call it my crutch. It always was there for me. I liked waking up in the morning and putting a big wad in and reading the news or forums on the computer. I'm a Law Enforcement Officer so tons of people at work use the stuff. When you spend ten hours a day driving around you HAVE TO find something to keep you busy...
So the first day I had two dips (one before I decided to quit) and one at night. Day two I made it all day with no dips.
Day three (I sit here and haven't dipped all day).
It has been hard, but not as hard as I thought it would be. I haven't really noticed a mood swing much but I've been trying to stay away from people until at least 72 hours.
I do at times feel dizzy? Almost "Hazey" or like I'm in a dream? Maybe dizzy isn't the right word but it feels like my eyes aren't working right...
I'm not really sure what it is but in the past I'd throw a dip in! I have been eating sunflower seeds when I get the urge to dip so that's pretty much no matter what I'm doing. I'm trying to find other things I can chew on just to satisfy the urge.
Hope I can do this! Wish me luck and THANKS FOR ANY HELP!
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Snuffcrutch go to the Welcome Center forum and get directions on how to post roll and post roll now and give us your promise that you wont use nicotine today, repeat tomorrow, and get you some seeds and big red gum, anything to pacify you to keep that shit out of your face! Wise decision you made! Glad to be quit with you today! Nicofiend
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There is no hope or luck involved. It's your promise and word to quit for TODAY. To toss that dip away from your memory, and not look back. What we have going on here is a tight nit community separated into quit groups, the group you are in will be your family and they will support you as long as you post roll everyday and promise to not use nicotine for TODAY. We quit one day at a time.
You'll find everything you need in the Welcome Center (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showforum=13) . I'm glad that you decided to make this decision. And you better not be wasting our time.
You didn't like the dip at all, it's the addiction that liked the dip. It was the addict inside of you that liked putting that cancer in your lip every morning.
Now the real man inside of you needs to step up and take action. Now instead of putting that shit in your mouth, YOU'RE gonna love waking up every morning and the first thing you will do is post roll and make your promise. Then you can go do what ever the fuck you please as long as you stay the fuck away from nicotine. Understood?
You see we don't have time for this, 'Oh my fucking god, I have smelly ass shit in teeth, I BETTER QUIT! Huh, well you know what, I guess one little dip won't hurt! Huh I'm mowing the grass, you know what goes good with that dontcha? CANCER FLAVORED SHIT!' I swear to GOD if I support you any further and YOU CAVE, I WILL SKULL FUCK YOU!
Go post roll here in your October quit group (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4873) as soon as the thread opens up.
Be active on the forums, be supportive of your brothers and most of all keep your promise that you make to us when you post roll EVERY FUCKING MORNING.
I'm really passive. Hopefully someone can come in here and chew your ass out.
Have a great day! ^_^
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There is no "Hope" to stop. There is no luck involved. Either you're quit or you're not quit. Plain and simple. It's your choice, and we're here to help if you need us. Make the promise, then keep your word.
The fogginess will eventually pass, but it will be a while. Embrace the suck.
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...I liked waking up in the morning and putting a big wad in and reading the news or forums on the computer...I'm a Law Enforcement Officer so tons of people at work use the stuff. When you spend ten hours a day driving around you HAVE TO find something to keep you busy...Â
...So the first day I had two dips (one before I decided to quit) and one at night. Day two I made it all day with no dips.
Day three (I sit here and haven't dipped all day)...
...I do at times feel dizzy? Almost "Hazey" or like I'm in a dream? Maybe dizzy isn't the right word but it feels like my eyes aren't working right...
...Hope I can do this! Wish me luck...
Welcome SnuffCrutch!
Couple of things for you:
1) Like you, I'm in law enforcement and I know how prevalent this addiction is among us. Admit to yourself that you are an addict. That's right...I said ADDICT. Almost exactly like the meth addicts and crack heads that you lock up on a regular basis, with the difference being that our drug of choice is legal. We lie to ourselves and say that we "like" our drug of choice, just like a tweaker. We neglect our families to get our fix, just like the perps. We plan our day around the fix, just like the junkies. We convince ourseleves that we like it, but we really are just trying to get back to "normal". The only thing that nicotine does is relieve the withdrawal symptoms that it creates in the first place. Sound familiar...like a speech you've given to someone in handcuffs? We see through people's bullshit everyday, but don't see through our own bullshit.
2) When you make a car stop...do you "hope" that you will be successful? Do you plan on "luck" when you make the arrest? Do you "hope" that the perp doesn't attack you? NO. You go confidently into that situation, take control and create success by any legal means necessary. Take that mentality into this quit. We do not "hope" here...we QUIT! There is no "luck", we make a decision and follow through.
3) That haze is what we refer to as "the fog". It's a withdrawal symptom, and it will ease up shortly.
4) Your day two as described in your intro, is day 1 here. Nicotine free is the key.
5) Post roll, promise not to use nicotine today, maintain the integrity of your word, worry about tomorrow when it gets here. You can do this...you put your life on the line daily to save strangers from harm. Start saving yourself from harm!
Glad to be quit with you...PM me if you need some backup.
Be safe,
-Dante
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We do not "hope" we "will"
We do not "try" we "do"
Its all about adjusting your mindset. Winners win because they think they can't lose. Banish defeat from your thoughts.
Quit with you.
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Dante MySize...
'clap' 'clap' 'clap'
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Good stuff there Crutch. Welcome aboard. We're here to support your quit...not your attempt.
You posting roll today brother?
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Good stuff there Crutch. Welcome aboard. We're here to support your quit...not your attempt.
You posting roll today brother?
'Popcorn'
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Welcome SnuffCrutch!
Couple of things for you:
1) Like you, I'm in law enforcement and I know how prevalent this addiction is among us. Admit to yourself that you are an addict. That's right...I said ADDICT. Almost exactly like the meth addicts and crack heads that you lock up on a regular basis, with the difference being that our drug of choice is legal. We lie to ourselves and say that we "like" our drug of choice, just like a tweaker. We neglect our families to get our fix, just like the perps. We plan our day around the fix, just like the junkies. We convince ourseleves that we like it, but we really are just trying to get back to "normal". The only thing that nicotine does is relieve the withdrawal symptoms that it creates in the first place. Sound familiar...like a speech you've given to someone in handcuffs? We see through people's bullshit everyday, but don't see through our own bullshit.
2) When you make a car stop...do you "hope" that you will be successful? Do you plan on "luck" when you make the arrest? Do you "hope" that the perp doesn't attack you? NO. You go confidently into that situation, take control and create success by any legal means necessary. Take that mentality into this quit. We do not "hope" here...we QUIT! There is no "luck", we make a decision and follow through.
3) That haze is what we refer to as "the fog". It's a withdrawal symptom, and it will ease up shortly.
4) Your day two as described in your intro, is day 1 here. Nicotine free is the key.
5) Post roll, promise not to use nicotine today, maintain the integrity of your word, worry about tomorrow when it gets here. You can do this...you put your life on the line daily to save strangers from harm. Start saving yourself from harm!
Glad to be quit with you...PM me if you need some backup.
Be safe,
-Dante
Dante,
The words help me a lot. #1's the best and that's part of the reason I decided to quit... I arrested two young adults with a couple bricks of heroin...on my way down to the jail a commercial came on the radio saying that nicotine is as addictive as heroin or meth...
I had a dip in at the time. That was the day before I quit.
And to everyone else I'm going to go figure out how to do this "roll" thing but I will post there. I'm feeling really strong this morning and know I can do this. Thanks for the support. PS I woke up and my breath was much better!
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I watched the video and read the tips and can't figure out which rollcall to post to there seem to be different groups?
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I watched the video and read the tips and can't figure out which rollcall to post to there seem to be different groups?
If Im reading this correctly, you are on your 2nd day dip free?
If so, September 2011 is your home.
Ask for Leahy, he'll get you in on the bowel movement watch list, and order your official pirate style eye patch.
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I watched the video and read the tips and can't figure out which rollcall to post to there seem to be different groups?
If your quit date is between 5/25/2011 and 6/23/2011 you are in the September 2011 HOF class ------------- index.php?showtopic=4751 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4751)
If your quit date is today, 6/24/2011 you are in the October HOF class - index.php?showtopic=4873 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4873)
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Hey Crutch, you've obviously got some bad-ass Quitters in your corner already, and it's only 9:30am here! They must like you :) I read your intro and I hear a lot of myself in it, only now that was 402 Days ago. I would not enjoy the Quit that I do now if It weren't for this place. Learn how to post roll, it is very easy. Just remember CTRL A + CTRL X + CTRL V....all you gotta know!
Also, your breath is going to get better, that is not your cue to start dipping again. MmmKay? In fact, you are going to convince yourself that you are all better, and likely never was 'addicted' and that you can Quit anytime...this is the nic-bitch whispering sweet nothings into your ear. She is mind fucking you. You are an addict. You can not be a 'social' dipper. It will own you. (there, I'll be your voice of reason.)
Stay strong my new Quit brother. I'll be looking for that Post later.
Cancrusher
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You posted a day 2 in October which is technically wrong, but who cares. You are quit today. I can't ask more than that. Good job. Post in September 2011 tomorrow. PM me if you need any thing! Glad to have you.
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I've been reading a lot on this site. All of it has come to make me realize that when I saw websites like this before, or anything related to the hazards of using tobacco, I straight up ignored it. I wouldn't even read it... I would "X" it out before I saw any pictures of oral surgery or the like. I was afraid of the truth, I was possessed by that shit and it made me oblivious to what could actually happen from using it. I sit here crunching on sunflower seeds and spitting the hulls into a cup knowing that just a couple days ago I'd have a wad of Cope in there...
I haven't had any nightmares yet... I read that others wake up at night in sweats and craving a dip.. That hasn't happened to me and I hope it won't.. But if it does it will help me to realize how much of a slave I was to this shit. I remember when I first started chewing how the shit would sting in my mouth.. That quit happening and it got to the point where I'd swallow the shit if I had nowhere to spit. All that diseased chemical shit getting swallowed? GROSS... I don't miss it at all. A guy at work yesterday threw a big dip in and asked me why I wasn't chewing... I told him and he started ribbing on me. I got on his ass and he said I sounded like his brother...
He'll probably throw some fists when I call him an addict!
Its going well for me so far just pass the sunflower seeds!
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I've been reading a lot on this site. All of it has come to make me realize that when I saw websites like this before, or anything related to the hazards of using tobacco, I straight up ignored it. I wouldn't even read it... I would "X" it out before I saw any pictures of oral surgery or the like. I was afraid of the truth, I was possessed by that shit and it made me oblivious to what could actually happen from using it. I sit here crunching on sunflower seeds and spitting the hulls into a cup knowing that just a couple days ago I'd have a wad of Cope in there...
I haven't had any nightmares yet... I read that others wake up at night in sweats and craving a dip.. That hasn't happened to me and I hope it won't.. But if it does it will help me to realize how much of a slave I was to this shit. I remember when I first started chewing how the shit would sting in my mouth.. That quit happening and it got to the point where I'd swallow the shit if I had nowhere to spit. All that diseased chemical shit getting swallowed? GROSS... I don't miss it at all. A guy at work yesterday threw a big dip in and asked me why I wasn't chewing... I told him and he started ribbing on me. I got on his ass and he said I sounded like his brother...
He'll probably throw some fists when I call him an addict!
Its going well for me so far just pass the sunflower seeds!
Good job. Don't worry, we addicts have all ignored reality to fuel addiction. You are no different than the rest of us. Now, you need to join us on NOT ignoring reality. All of the successful quitters know a lot about our addiction. It helps us help others. It helps us help ourselves. Glad you are here. :) Get involved.
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I've been reading a lot on this site. All of it has come to make me realize that when I saw websites like this before, or anything related to the hazards of using tobacco, I straight up ignored it. I wouldn't even read it... I would "X" it out before I saw any pictures of oral surgery or the like. I was afraid of the truth, I was possessed by that shit and it made me oblivious to what could actually happen from using it. I sit here crunching on sunflower seeds and spitting the hulls into a cup knowing that just a couple days ago I'd have a wad of Cope in there...
I haven't had any nightmares yet... I read that others wake up at night in sweats and craving a dip.. That hasn't happened to me and I hope it won't.. But if it does it will help me to realize how much of a slave I was to this shit. I remember when I first started chewing how the shit would sting in my mouth.. That quit happening and it got to the point where I'd swallow the shit if I had nowhere to spit. All that diseased chemical shit getting swallowed? GROSS... I don't miss it at all. A guy at work yesterday threw a big dip in and asked me why I wasn't chewing... I told him and he started ribbing on me. I got on his ass and he said I sounded like his brother...
He'll probably throw some fists when I call him an addict!
Its going well for me so far just pass the sunflower seeds!
Good job. Don't worry, we addicts have all ignored reality to fuel addiction. You are no different than the rest of us. Now, you need to join us on NOT ignoring reality. All of the successful quitters know a lot about our addiction. It helps us help others. It helps us help ourselves. Glad you are here. :) Get involved.
Take solace in the fact that your co-working IS jealous of your bravery and newly dropped, colossal cajones.
Every active nic-user is jealous of a Quitter, 100%. You can take that to the bank. However, they will rarely admit it.
Keep up the good work! See you in September in the morning coach.
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I watched the video and read the tips and can't figure out which rollcall to post to there seem to be different groups?
If Im reading this correctly, you are on your 2nd day dip free?
If so, September 2011 is your home.
Ask for Leahy, he'll get you in on the bowel movement watch list, and order your official pirate style eye patch.
Welcome SC.
There is a video?
I'm mean I seen some videos of Ready's junk. But was never aware of an official welcome vid.
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I watched the video and read the tips and can't figure out which rollcall to post to there seem to be different groups?
If Im reading this correctly, you are on your 2nd day dip free?
If so, September 2011 is your home.
Ask for Leahy, he'll get you in on the bowel movement watch list, and order your official pirate style eye patch.
Welcome SC.
There is a video?
I'm mean I seen some videos of Ready's junk. But was never aware of an official welcome vid.
Video ? I will have to check my stash and see if the "secret" video is missing...
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Aw shit I told him to post in October. It was way late last night, I thought he meant that he had just quit lol.
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video for roll (http://www.killthecan.org/roll/)
The secret video...
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I've been reading a lot on this site. All of it has come to make me realize that when I saw websites like this before, or anything related to the hazards of using tobacco, I straight up ignored it. I wouldn't even read it... I would "X" it out before I saw any pictures of oral surgery or the like. I was afraid of the truth, I was possessed by that shit and it made me oblivious to what could actually happen from using it. I sit here crunching on sunflower seeds and spitting the hulls into a cup knowing that just a couple days ago I'd have a wad of Cope in there...
I haven't had any nightmares yet... I read that others wake up at night in sweats and craving a dip.. That hasn't happened to me and I hope it won't.. But if it does it will help me to realize how much of a slave I was to this shit. I remember when I first started chewing how the shit would sting in my mouth.. That quit happening and it got to the point where I'd swallow the shit if I had nowhere to spit. All that diseased chemical shit getting swallowed? GROSS... I don't miss it at all. A guy at work yesterday threw a big dip in and asked me why I wasn't chewing... I told him and he started ribbing on me. I got on his ass and he said I sounded like his brother...
He'll probably throw some fists when I call him an addict!
Its going well for me so far just pass the sunflower seeds!
Good job. Don't worry, we addicts have all ignored reality to fuel addiction. You are no different than the rest of us. Now, you need to join us on NOT ignoring reality. All of the successful quitters know a lot about our addiction. It helps us help others. It helps us help ourselves. Glad you are here. :) Get involved.
Take solace in the fact that your co-working IS jealous of your bravery and newly dropped, colossal cajones.
Every active nic-user is jealous of a Quitter, 100%. You can take that to the bank. However, they will rarely admit it.
Keep up the good work! See you in September in the morning coach.
Exactly crusher. You are proving something about your ability to master yourself. The user either wishes s/he could or has willfully chosen the slow path the suicide. You can't make the guy that wants to die of oral cancer care about life but your quit can and will encourage others to quit with you.
proud to be quit with you crutch
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Hey Snuffcrutch, Your quit group is September 2011 (http://forum.killthecan.org/index.php?showtopic=4751) as others have pointed out. Keep up the good work. glad to be quit with you,
30
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I've been reading a lot on this site. All of it has come to make me realize that when I saw websites like this before, or anything related to the hazards of using tobacco, I straight up ignored it. I wouldn't even read it... I would "X" it out before I saw any pictures of oral surgery or the like. I was afraid of the truth, I was possessed by that shit and it made me oblivious to what could actually happen from using it. I sit here crunching on sunflower seeds and spitting the hulls into a cup knowing that just a couple days ago I'd have a wad of Cope in there...
I haven't had any nightmares yet... I read that others wake up at night in sweats and craving a dip.. That hasn't happened to me and I hope it won't.. But if it does it will help me to realize how much of a slave I was to this shit. I remember when I first started chewing how the shit would sting in my mouth.. That quit happening and it got to the point where I'd swallow the shit if I had nowhere to spit. All that diseased chemical shit getting swallowed? GROSS... I don't miss it at all.
Its going well for me so far just pass the sunflower seeds!
A guy at work yesterday threw a big dip in and asked me why I wasn't chewing... I told him and he started ribbing on me. I got on his ass and he said I sounded like his brother...
He'll probably throw some fists when I call him an addict!
Good morning SC,
I've been reading your intro posts and we have some similar history. I spent more than 20 years in public safety, starting as a firefighter, then paramedic, with the occasional LEO stint.
I think there's another problem with people like us that we don't like to admit and it really contributes to our addiction. Somewhere just below the surface...I'm Superman. I'm not saying that we think we're heros, but most people in that line of work are type A personalities and just a bit of an attitude. It's what makes us run INTO burning buildings when everyone else is running out...run TOWARDS the gunfire...we take calculated risks and think we'll come out the other side unharmed. Unfortunately I've been to far too many LODD funerals and now I know better.
The same is true when it comes to our addiction. We rationalize and decide that it's all good...we'll come out the other side unharmed. As many here will tell you, there are more funerals from dipping than line-of-duty deaths. So where does that leave us?
We choose to not take a dip for another day...just one day. Then we show up tomorrow and do it all over again. As someone who's been under fire both in the military and in public safety, I knew that my brothers had my back when the shit got bad. It's the same here...actually, they're probably a little more intense here to tell the truth...and everyone will go above and beyond to help you through your quit.
I'm also in the September group...today is day 5 for me. Aside from not sleeping well, I'm doing pretty good. A few of these guys have been walking me through "the suck", and that's made all the difference. Actually, I love that they've given these things names...The Suck, Nic Bitch, etc... You cannot hate what you cannot name. So, give your addiction a name and hate away. I got your back, because I know you've got mine.