KillTheCan.org Accountability Forum
Community => Introductions => Topic started by: Recruit23 on May 14, 2013, 12:26:00 PM
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Hey all,
My name is Kevin and I have been dipping for the majority of 7 years. I am a young professional and I am in my second year of working in the real world.
I have recently moved in with my fiance, who does not know of my bad habit. I have been dipping at work, on car rides, while walking the dog, etc. I recently purposefully left my wallet at home before going out to a bar with my fiance and a friend, just so that I had an excuse to go back home to enjoy a dip on the walk back.
That was the last straw. I felt sick that I would leave my friend and fiance because fulfilling my craving was more important to me than them. I knew then that it was time to quit.
I'm excited to get this quitting adventure going. I quit officially today (5/14). I have a couple tins of grinds to help with the physical craving of spitting and plenty of caffeine to redirect my addiction.
I think the toughest times for me are going to be at work around 10 AM, the drives back and for to work, after meals, and when my fiance is at work at the hospital and I am alone at the apt during the weekend. But I hope with all your support, you can discourage my temptation to cave and encourage a healthier Kevin.
I look forward to talking with you all and quitting with everyone in the group! Go August!!
Kevin
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Hey all,
My name is Kevin and I have been dipping for the majority of 7 years. I am a young professional and I am in my second year of working in the real world.
I have recently moved in with my fiance, who does not know of my bad habit. I have been dipping at work, on car rides, while walking the dog, etc. I recently purposefully left my wallet at home before going out to a bar with my fiance and a friend, just so that I had an excuse to go back home to enjoy a dip on the walk back.
That was the last straw. I felt sick that I would leave my friend and fiance because fulfilling my craving was more important to me than them. I knew then that it was time to quit.
I'm excited to get this quitting adventure going. I quit officially today (5/14). I have a couple tins of grinds to help with the physical craving of spitting and plenty of caffeine to redirect my addiction.
I think the toughest times for me are going to be at work around 10 AM, the drives back and for to work, after meals, and when my fiance is at work at the hospital and I am alone at the apt during the weekend. But I hope with all your support, you can discourage my temptation to cave and encourage a healthier Kevin.
I look forward to talking with you all and quitting with everyone in the group! Go August!!
Kevin
You're new but lets change some verbiage.
"No hoping" around here - only way to attack this is head on with no room for error - Go post your promise in Aug 13 and do it every day
check your inbox (1) upper right
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Kevin,
Welcome to August. There is gonna be suck. Expect it, get ahead of it and don't cave. I know a little bit about the ninja dip - find my intro post - 15 days in on my quit and you are in the right place. Lots of support here.
PM me if you need anything.
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Ok first welcome. Second you Need to go read all the stuff In the welcome center. Third post roll. PM me if you have a tough time getting roll figured out, it was hell on me. Fourth Greg is right this is going to suck really bad for several days. This will be pure unadulterated hell, trust us we just took our badass selves through it. Take it one day at a time. I am 15 days into my quit and dipped over 20yrs. Fith, finally you need to tell your gal. She is going to notice some weird shit with you. If you think your could drink a fith of crown with maybe.... Lets say...6 beers and her not notice you are drinking... Well then maybe you dont have to tell her. My advice is tell her, she will notice, better she know what is going on with you.
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I'm excited to get this quitting adventure going. I quit officially today (5/14). I have a couple tins of grinds to help with the physical craving of spitting and plenty of caffeine to redirect my addiction.
Caffeine? Baaaaad! Water? Gooooood! Seriously man, you're going to be putting your body and mind through the wringer over the next few days... The last thing you need to be is even more jacked up than you're already going to be.
3 days. That's when the nic is gone from your body. Help yourself along by flushing your body of the poison you've been soaking up for 7 years. Also... Don't redirect your attention. Pay attention to every moment of SUCK you're going to go through! Remember it. Dig it. Use it. NEVER put yourself in a position to have to do it again. You. Are. Quit. That... Kicks ass. Glad to help in any way I can. PM if you need anything. Rock it, bro!
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Ha nice zoolander reference. Ill stick to the water. Thanks for the advice.
Seems like my legs are a little looser than normal and my mind isnt nearly as focused. But I'll get through day 1 and move onto day 2, one at a time.
If anyone else is a first day quitter today, PM me. We can get each other through it. I am checking this very often as I go through the initial suck. So write me and I will respond.
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Hey all,
My name is Kevin and I have been dipping for the majority of 7 years. I am a young professional and I am in my second year of working in the real world.
I have recently moved in with my fiance, who does not know of my bad habit. I have been dipping at work, on car rides, while walking the dog, etc. I recently purposefully left my wallet at home before going out to a bar with my fiance and a friend, just so that I had an excuse to go back home to enjoy a dip on the walk back.
That was the last straw. I felt sick that I would leave my friend and fiance because fulfilling my craving was more important to me than them. I knew then that it was time to quit.
I'm excited to get this quitting adventure going. I quit officially today (5/14). I have a couple tins of grinds to help with the physical craving of spitting and plenty of caffeine to redirect my addiction.
I think the toughest times for me are going to be at work around 10 AM, the drives back and for to work, after meals, and when my fiance is at work at the hospital and I am alone at the apt during the weekend. But I hope with all your support, you can discourage my temptation to cave and encourage a healthier Kevin.
I look forward to talking with you all and quitting with everyone in the group! Go August!!
Kevin
I am 8 days into my quit. I am drinking loads of h20,
if you need something in your mouth, gum, get the fake stuff, (smokey mountain, kikit),
Caffeine will increase your anxiety and make the "suck" worse.
I was a major coffee drinker, i am down to 2 cups before 10AM and then water.
I am 45 years working in the "real world"...
Count yourself lucky quit now before you at 55 and trying to.
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Thanks for the post nebraskadad. I got my grinds pouches and a bottle of water now instead of the coffee.
Glad to be a part of all your quits.
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Still day 1 for me. Seems like its dragging on forever, but I think thats to be expected. Drove back to work from lunch and passed my favorite 7-11. Took a lot for me not to stop in. But I am proud to say I didn't and still dip free. Just about to pass the first 24 hours.
Tonight is going to be rough with no one at home and just me and the nba games.
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Still day 1 for me. Seems like its dragging on forever, but I think thats to be expected. Drove back to work from lunch and passed my favorite 7-11. Took a lot for me not to stop in. But I am proud to say I didn't and still dip free. Just about to pass the first 24 hours.
Tonight is going to be rough with no one at home and just me and the nba games.
hang in there. do what ever you can do to keep from picking up.
"embrace the suck" is what a lot of the guys said those 1st few hours and days.
Knowing that the "suck" ends, and you can get through it minute by minute.
I am not going to say the suck is over yet for me, but i do know I am able to get through it without stopping at kwikshop and picking up a can o' crap.
breath, exercise, drink loads of h20
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Mtims quit today, pm him and get with him. It gets better and easeir every passing day. I will pm u with my number call me if you need me. Also did you or are you going to let your future bride know?
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http://www.killthecan.org/community/spouse.asp (http://www.killthecan.org/community/spouse.asp)
send your girl to this page you will accomplish more with her than without her. She has to know this about you... You need to do this for YOU! You are an addict know that. Embrace the suck remember all the torment you are going through. Never again for any reason (NAFAR) read the welcome center read about what is going to start happening to you... I drank cranberry juice a shit load of it...pile of seeds n gum.
PM me if you need anything!
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Still day 1 for me. Seems like its dragging on forever, but I think thats to be expected. Drove back to work from lunch and passed my favorite 7-11. Took a lot for me not to stop in. But I am proud to say I didn't and still dip free. Just about to pass the first 24 hours.
Tonight is going to be rough with no one at home and just me and the nba games.
Glad to see you posted recruit. It's time to take your life back my friend. I'm on 89 and I kick myself in the but every day for dipping as long as I did. Life is so much better than with it. I wish you could be in my shoes for one minute. Nicotine has clouded your mind, stole, stunk up your breath, taken your money, and taken your dignity.
I've listed the bad, now let me list the good it's done. I'M SORRY, I'VE GOT NOTHING.
I quit with you today,,, If you need anything pm me.
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Let her know or don't let her know... Man it is your call. I ninja dipped for about 25 years. Wife knew I chewed on hunting or fishing trips and at games. Had no clue I chewed a can a day for 25 years. If you don't feel comfortable telling her I wouldn't. What is important today is you keeping your word to yourself and all of us. That means that when you wake up, before you do anything else, you post roll. You are obviously an honorable man, so you will keep your word. Don't worry or stress about anything, don't feel pressures to divulge your secret past. Just post every day. We are all on the sidelines cheering you on.
By the way, I've been working for almost 20 years wearing a suit and tie every day and hid a lip full of chew every day of those years every time I got in my car until Christmas Eve of 2012. If I and the thousands of other quitters on this site can do it - you will too!
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Thanks worktowin. Really appreciate the post. I don't think I'm going to tell my fiance, I am really afraid of the repercussions. You guys have given me the confidence I need to get through day 1. Thanks! Cant wait to post tomorrow
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Good luck man. We are here pulling for you. You know best on you secret, but be honest with yourself, it is a secret best told before you are on the brink of losing your mind. I am not one of the "you owe her the truth" guys, but you need to monitor it closely. I too like Worktowin wear a suit every day and dipped a can a day of cope in that suit in meetings. A hell of a ninja dumbass i was. My family knew but not my work. I had no intention of telling work until several guys here convinced me otherwise. Damn glad i did, 2nd day in my assistant walked in my office and sent me home, she knew I was starting to make an ass of myself due to her awareness of what I was going thru.
Just keep an eye on it, you may not act as stupid as me lol (I really was low on the IQ during my first week) but if you start getting agitated, anxious, or stupid you will have to tell her. Then you may find yourself dealing with her pissed and hurt while you can barely think and are as anxious as you've ever been. that would suck.
Actually fuck all that I just said. Either tell her or go on vacation and leave town, tell her your out of phone service for two weeks. Odds of you pulling this off are not high. This is going to suck. It's going to hurt. You are going to have moments of climbing the walls. Plus you need her support. In fact ask some of the longterm vets before settling your mind. This is important to your quit dude! Nonetheless I am quit with you man.
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Recruit 23, the best advice I can give you is to change up your daily routine a little bit. Instead of sitting around and watching the game like you would normally do with a dip in, go workout or spend some extra time reading the horror stories and the success stories on this website. Every day is going to be a battle man, but you've got your brothers here at KTC to help get you through each one of them. I'm on day 9 right now so I'm not far ahead of you, but if there's anything I can help you with just PM me. Keep fighting the fight bro!
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Thanks Nic10. I think thats a good call. I'm gonna go for a run.
Erussell, don't tell me my odds for pulling this off isnt high... thats not cool. Thought this was all about support. There are plenty of success entries I have read from ninja dippers.
Please stay positive if you are going to write on my thread here or keep the judges to yourself. I understand that you are trying to help, but this is my quit. I really do appreciate all of the tips and advice, but let me make my own decisions and dont judge me when they are different from what you believe.
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Hey recruit! Similar story here. Engaged, young professional, just wrapping of my first year of work in the real world, been dipping for 6yrs. I haven't dipped in almost a week.
Find what works for you. I'm not saying that what people are telling you is wrong, but different people handle things differently. Get through the first couple of days anyway you can. It will get better. If you want any advice or need anything, feel free to PM me. Thanks for joining us.
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Thanks Nic10. I think thats a good call. I'm gonna go for a run.
Erussell, don't tell me my odds for pulling this off isnt high... thats not cool. Thought this was all about support. There are plenty of success entries I have read from ninja dippers.
Please stay positive if you are going to write on my thread here or keep the judges to yourself. I understand that you are trying to help, but this is my quit. I really do appreciate all of the tips and advice, but let me make my own decisions and dont judge me when they are different from what you believe.
Sorry bro! Not a bit of judgement in my post, just advice, as for the "pull it off" that was meant for the hiding it not wether you quit or not. It is your quit! I was trying to support you man. This site is not about what we want to hear its more about what we need to hear. You think it best you didn't hear both sides of the decision not to tell her? Like it or not there are two sides to that! And true the advice isnt always best hell I am a new quiter myself. But if you said "I am going to smoke for a month to get me used to not dipping" and i said that was stupid would you then say i was negative cause you didn't like the advice? But like I said you know best for your situation. Trust me I'll stay off "your thread" but that won't stop the fact that I am quit with you and glad to be so.
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Kevin, the path you have chosen is a rough one and everyone here knows that. Many decisions will be yours and only you can make that judgement but we share our experiences and personal judgements to encourage each other on. I was a ninja dipper for 40 years and a ninja quitter (except for my wife of 33 years). Over the past year I've had this discussion with several ninja quitters.
Part of my addiction that I hated the most was the lies. The lies led to me not only hating tabacco, my addiction and my secret life but I grew to hate myself and my weak ass. My first step to quitting actually happened 5 months before my quit date (I stopped lying to my wife) I came clean about what I had become. For me being totally honest with her gave me as much freedom as quitting nicotine. For me telling anyone else all my secret weaknesses is totally unnecessary, but as spouses I want to strive for total honesty and trust. Actually one of the events that led me to taking that step of quitting was my wife's diagnosis of MS. I want to be healthy and ably to care for her if that becomes necessary.
I'm 100% behind you and your quit! Pm me if you need anything.
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I am not gonna bust your balls but, do you want to see another relationship built on trust n truth or lies and deception. What are you gonna do if she held something back and you find out are you gonna be all cool and so oh honey I forgive you...or do you want to fight a fight on a single front with your quit and have her unite with you and say lets kick this in the ass together. You are making a fatal mistake you are thinking for her you are making decisions based on what you think not based on what you know.
I have my fiancé in my corner and she is rocking it with me. she sends me texts every now and then and says today is ....
that is cool we battle the nic bitch together.
up to you I will be here pm me if youre stuck
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The chances of you succeeding if you post roll every day and continue to be a man of your word are 100%. Today that is all that matters. Welcome to day 2. You've got this.
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Welcome Kevin ! Good job guys. Strength in numbers, build accountability with each other and to the site. I am Quit with all of you.
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Kevin, you are at the right place to find support at being quit. I was a ninja dipper too or at least I thought I was. I got busted by my girlfriend a few times, my fiance a few times, and my wife a few times. Long story short I lied to my wife about my addiction before we got married and after we were married. I blew it off each time and told her I just bought a tin because I was stressed, bored.... Just lies.
Early in my quit I didn't even consider it an option to tell my wife what I was doing. I would only log onto KTC at work because I didn't want to get busted.
About 12 days quit I told my wife everything - my decision to quit, kill the can, the ninja dipper BS. I was terrified that:
A.) she would not give a shit - as in "why can't you just quit"
B.) she would get up, kick me in the balls, and walk out.
C.) she would ask me why I lied about my addiction.
D.) all of the above and divorce me.
Now my wife is my biggest supporter and I don't have to live with the lies. It has strengthened my quit more than I could imagine.
All that matters in the end is that you have made the choice to live your life without nicotine today. I am proud to be quit with you and everyone at KTC.
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Thanks Nic10. I think thats a good call. I'm gonna go for a run.
Erussell, don't tell me my odds for pulling this off isnt high... thats not cool. Thought this was all about support. There are plenty of success entries I have read from ninja dippers.
Please stay positive if you are going to write on my thread here or keep the judges to yourself. I understand that you are trying to help, but this is my quit. I really do appreciate all of the tips and advice, but let me make my own decisions and dont judge me when they are different from what you believe.
Recruit23 hope you check in.. getting over the 1st 24 hours is a big hurdle.
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Havent seen you post roll yet Recruit, are you doing ok do you need to talk to someone? PM if you do.
T
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Thanks Nic10. I think thats a good call. I'm gonna go for a run.
Erussell, don't tell me my odds for pulling this off isnt high... thats not cool. Thought this was all about support. There are plenty of success entries I have read from ninja dippers.
Please stay positive if you are going to write on my thread here or keep the judges to yourself. I understand that you are trying to help, but this is my quit. I really do appreciate all of the tips and advice, but let me make my own decisions and dont judge me when they are different from what you believe.
Recruit23 hope you check in.. getting over the 1st 24 hours is a big hurdle.
Sounds like Erussell touched a nerve...
I don't have much new to tell you... Except! You are an addict! And addicts are great at justifying anything! I know because I am an addict too... Not telling your girl will bite you in the ass. Do you think you wont have mood changes? Ultimately its your choice. I've read a lot about successful ninja dippers too. The majority of them came clean... Sorry! Can't hold your hand and tell you that your right. Lying is an addicts game!
You will get a ton of support here. But only about things you are real and honest about. Some times negative things will be said to you in order to show you that a new way of thinking is needed.
Nothing about your addiction is positive! Its all negative. So some of the conversations you have will be negative. You will have days when you want to make a post cursing the world! that's o.k.Take what you can from the advice you get and grow. We wont always agree. But we will always help.
Post roll today as soon as you wake up!
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Glad to see you posted role! Today is all that matters.
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Hey everyone,
Let me first apologize for calling out erussell. I know you were just offering advice and I really do appreciate everyones input into my quit. It does help to hear both sides. I'm taking this day by day and just focusing on what is going to get me through this quit. Right now, my fiance isnt what I need, but who knows that may change.
I think what it comes down to for me is that I got myself into this shit on my own. I became a slave to the can on my own doing and even when my other friends who started with me quit after a year or two, I just kept dipping. So this is all on me. And therefore, I want this quit to be all on me. I put myself into this shit, I will bring myself out.
Sorry for the late roll too, but get used to it ha. I'm on the west coast, so my roll will be around 11-12 ET each morning.
Again, I really want to thank everyone for their posts and advice and support. It means a lot to me and its pulling me through and pushing me past the 7-11's I drive by to and from work.
Kevin
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Recruit, just keep quitting. Your a few days in everyone will be a little bitchy. Hell at day 72 I went into a rage for 12 hours I could not explain. You're quit and I am quit with you.
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If you focus on you and make yourself better, the rest always falls into place. Glad your here
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Hey man your still here, that what we all hoped to see while we were busting your balls yesterday! I appreciate the open apology, but again as I said in the PM it isn't necessary. You get pissed at us as much as you want. That's part of the quit bro. I admit my message was not well worded either. I could have been just as tough on you but without a few of the trigger words and you wouldn't have probably reacted the way you did. Hey man glad to have your ass in our Groupe and I am proud like hell to be quitting with you! Don't think this means we are all going to loosen up, lol.
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Hey everyone,
Let me first apologize for calling out erussell. I know you were just offering advice and I really do appreciate everyones input into my quit. It does help to hear both sides. I'm taking this day by day and just focusing on what is going to get me through this quit. Right now, my fiance isnt what I need, but who knows that may change.
I think what it comes down to for me is that I got myself into this shit on my own. I became a slave to the can on my own doing and even when my other friends who started with me quit after a year or two, I just kept dipping. So this is all on me. And therefore, I want this quit to be all on me. I put myself into this shit, I will bring myself out.
Sorry for the late roll too, but get used to it ha. I'm on the west coast, so my roll will be around 11-12 ET each morning.
Again, I really want to thank everyone for their posts and advice and support. It means a lot to me and its pulling me through and pushing me past the 7-11's I drive by to and from work.
Kevin
Recruit,, your showing a lot of sincerity in your posts. You seem like a smart, intellegent and laid back type of guy. Right now all that may be a little difficult to pull off, so don't beat yourself up. Better you quit and have a little of that here then head down to the corner store to buy the poison.
Don't worry about erussell,,, he can take it. He was right where you are not to long ago,, as all of us. Sometimes I'm surprised things like this don't happen every day, venting I mean.
I'm a little nosy some time,, so I might check in from time to time to see how long you make it before the girl finds out. If she's as smart as I think she is,, your going to have a hard time keeping things from her... Only time will tell. Very interesting to say the least.
Bottom line,, stay quit, whatever it takes. Glad to be quit with you....
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you are doing what you are supposed to do here get angry at us we know it isnt you its the poison leaving your veins. We just wanted you to let your girl in so that if she gets blindsided by it she doesnt come uncorked on you and push you into a situation that you might have tried to in the past medicated yourself with a dip to knock the edge off. We are addicts here to the most addicting chemical on earth. one dip and we are gone rite back into the bowels of hell. We are just brothers and sisters looking out for eachother. Listen you will learn. Me for example I thought I was unique and no one would get me...read the posts we are all similar we just live in different towns and places but we are all connected the nic bitch brought us here and we are all quit and we dont want anyone to cave.
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48 hours in. Definitely got some withdrawal. Eating seeds, using fake pouches and tea bags like crazy, but its not the shit. I'd be lying if I said it didnt cross my mind as I drove by my 7-11 to stop in, but I didn't.
I am quit today.
Been thinking about this weekend and what I am going to do with myself to keep me quit. Anyone got suggestions?
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48 hours in. Definitely got some withdrawal. Eating seeds, using fake pouches and tea bags like crazy, but its not the shit. I'd be lying if I said it didnt cross my mind as I drove by my 7-11 to stop in, but I didn't.
I am quit today.
Been thinking about this weekend and what I am going to do with myself to keep me quit. Anyone got suggestions?
start a project! If you like to build something, build. If you like to beat video games/ play. Whatever you like to do, do it. Set a goal and achieve it. Last weekend, I grabbed a can of fake chew and set out for lowes to buy $150 worth of lumber and supplies, took me all weekend to finish but I enjoyed my fake chew and was very satisfied when I was done.
The thing not to do: Is plan to do nothing or take a weekend to relax. This is not that weekend, that weekend can come later. Idle hands and mind is very bad and only makes it worse. Keep yourself balls to the walls from sun up until sundown.
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48 hours in. Definitely got some withdrawal. Eating seeds, using fake pouches and tea bags like crazy, but its not the shit. I'd be lying if I said it didnt cross my mind as I drove by my 7-11 to stop in, but I didn't.
I am quit today.
Been thinking about this weekend and what I am going to do with myself to keep me quit. Anyone got suggestions?
start a project! If you like to build something, build. If you like to beat video games/ play. Whatever you like to do, do it. Set a goal and achieve it. Last weekend, I grabbed a can of fake chew and set out for lowes to buy $150 worth of lumber and supplies, took me all weekend to finish but I enjoyed my fake chew and was very satisfied when I was done.
The thing not to do: Is plan to do nothing or take a weekend to relax. This is not that weekend, that weekend can come later. Idle hands and mind is very bad and only makes it worse. Keep yourself balls to the walls from sun up until sundown.
That's some seriously good advice mollies. Recruit this weekend is going to be rough. The only time your not going to think about dip is when your sleeping, which might not go to well either. Exchange some phone #s. When the going gets tough reach out. Let this site help you. I'm going to send you my number. It will be in you're inbox.
When the going gets tough remember, ,,, it gets so much better. One day at a time,,, you got this. Quitting is the best thing i ever did. I quit with you today.
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I would have to second MM and Srans. I thought taking it easy was the plan. It was miserable. It will be tough as you will be unfocused but do stay busy and have it planned busy if you can.
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Whats up guys,
Thought I would put in an entry because my Day 2 was not easy and wanted to spill out some shit that went through my head.
I had a pretty big craving for a good portion of the afternoon after lunch yesterday. This was expected because that was a time everyday when I would have a lip. Anyways, I got through that and made it home feeling really good. I could feel the crave subside and I was very clear minded thinking about how I got this and that I could go this.
But then, around 7-8 o'clock, I started to seriously wonder why I even wanted to quit. I was telling myself how I enjoyed doing it, it was a nice stress reliever, I had figured out a way to pretty much do it at any time, in front of anyone and have no one realize, it was something to do when I was bored and it passed the time. I had also been thinking about how I was so much younger, and have dipped for so much less time than most of the people I have been reading about on this site. So whats another couple years when I am not even at the decade point.
So I started looking up what one lip would do to my quit. I found the law of addiction and how it would restart the clock the instant i put that shit in. Somehow, that first thought started a whirlwind of clear thoughts.
I remembered that the reason I wanted to quit was because it was making me less social than I wanted to be. I wanted to quit weighing secretly in my head if I wanted to go out and do something or if I would rather just stay in and dip on the couch (too often, the latter won). I remembered that I have a wedding coming up and will be damned if I am going to miss out on any of the planning, engagement parties, reception, honeymoon, etc because I snuck off to have a lip.
I remembered that I wanted to be free of the constant thought of the tin in my head, did i have enough for the day at work? weekend? vacation? should I dip now or wait a little while to get the most out of it, even though I will be doing it again in an hour or so? Are all my spitters, tins, spit cleaned up and put away in a safe enough spot so I wont get caught? Can anyone tell that I have this lip in? my boss? my friends? How can i sneak away so that I can get a 20 min sesh in without missing anything or, more importantly, have anyone notice?
Anyways, I have rambled, but I wanted to put it out there for comments and for anyone that has, is, or will go through the same type of thoughts, which I am sure is just about everyone on this site at some point.
My craving tried to blind me from my goals and the reasons that I am quitting. I would be lying if I told you I didnt come close to giving in. But, my head cleared and I was able to see the craving for what it really was, an attempt to hit me while I was weak and to push me back to the shit. When you are faced with the same questions and doubt of why your putting yourself through this shit, remember what you thought about before you quit, when you head was clear. Might be a good idea to write that shit down so you can pull it out later, when the craving prevents you from seeing it.
I am proud to say that I made it through that night and I am still quit. I have a face full of seeds (btw, the flamas flavor of frito lays seeds gives you a burn which is pretty great) and not of dip. I am 6 hours from hitting that 72 hour marker and having the nic out of my system. I know I am no where near done at that point, but I will take the milestone.
Kevin
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Whats up guys,
Thought I would put in an entry because my Day 2 was not easy and wanted to spill out some shit that went through my head.
I had a pretty big craving for a good portion of the afternoon after lunch yesterday. This was expected because that was a time everyday when I would have a lip. Anyways, I got through that and made it home feeling really good. I could feel the crave subside and I was very clear minded thinking about how I got this and that I could go this.
But then, around 7-8 o'clock, I started to seriously wonder why I even wanted to quit. I was telling myself how I enjoyed doing it, it was a nice stress reliever, I had figured out a way to pretty much do it at any time, in front of anyone and have no one realize, it was something to do when I was bored and it passed the time. I had also been thinking about how I was so much younger, and have dipped for so much less time than most of the people I have been reading about on this site. So whats another couple years when I am not even at the decade point.
So I started looking up what one lip would do to my quit. I found the law of addiction and how it would restart the clock the instant i put that shit in. Somehow, that first thought started a whirlwind of clear thoughts.
I remembered that the reason I wanted to quit was because it was making me less social than I wanted to be. I wanted to quit weighing secretly in my head if I wanted to go out and do something or if I would rather just stay in and dip on the couch (too often, the latter won). I remembered that I have a wedding coming up and will be damned if I am going to miss out on any of the planning, engagement parties, reception, honeymoon, etc because I snuck off to have a lip.
I remembered that I wanted to be free of the constant thought of the tin in my head, did i have enough for the day at work? weekend? vacation? should I dip now or wait a little while to get the most out of it, even though I will be doing it again in an hour or so? Are all my spitters, tins, spit cleaned up and put away in a safe enough spot so I wont get caught? Can anyone tell that I have this lip in? my boss? my friends? How can i sneak away so that I can get a 20 min sesh in without missing anything or, more importantly, have anyone notice?
Anyways, I have rambled, but I wanted to put it out there for comments and for anyone that has, is, or will go through the same type of thoughts, which I am sure is just about everyone on this site at some point.
My craving tried to blind me from my goals and the reasons that I am quitting. I would be lying if I told you I didnt come close to giving in. But, my head cleared and I was able to see the craving for what it really was, an attempt to hit me while I was weak and to push me back to the shit. When you are faced with the same questions and doubt of why your putting yourself through this shit, remember what you thought about before you quit, when you head was clear. Might be a good idea to write that shit down so you can pull it out later, when the craving prevents you from seeing it.
I am proud to say that I made it through that night and I am still quit. I have a face full of seeds (btw, the flamas flavor of frito lays seeds gives you a burn which is pretty great) and not of dip. I am 6 hours from hitting that 72 hour marker and having the nic out of my system. I know I am no where near done at that point, but I will take the milestone.
Kevin
Kevin, I sent you my phone number yesterday. Check your inbox. Were both on the West Coast, you can text me or call me if you need to. You need to turn to the support groups so you don't fight alone.
Other than that keep quitting. I quit with you again today.
Jeff
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Whats up guys,
Thought I would put in an entry because my Day 2 was not easy and wanted to spill out some shit that went through my head.
I had a pretty big craving for a good portion of the afternoon after lunch yesterday. This was expected because that was a time everyday when I would have a lip. Anyways, I got through that and made it home feeling really good. I could feel the crave subside and I was very clear minded thinking about how I got this and that I could go this.
But then, around 7-8 o'clock, I started to seriously wonder why I even wanted to quit. I was telling myself how I enjoyed doing it, it was a nice stress reliever, I had figured out a way to pretty much do it at any time, in front of anyone and have no one realize, it was something to do when I was bored and it passed the time. I had also been thinking about how I was so much younger, and have dipped for so much less time than most of the people I have been reading about on this site. So whats another couple years when I am not even at the decade point.
So I started looking up what one lip would do to my quit. I found the law of addiction and how it would restart the clock the instant i put that shit in. Somehow, that first thought started a whirlwind of clear thoughts.
I remembered that the reason I wanted to quit was because it was making me less social than I wanted to be. I wanted to quit weighing secretly in my head if I wanted to go out and do something or if I would rather just stay in and dip on the couch (too often, the latter won). I remembered that I have a wedding coming up and will be damned if I am going to miss out on any of the planning, engagement parties, reception, honeymoon, etc because I snuck off to have a lip.
I remembered that I wanted to be free of the constant thought of the tin in my head, did i have enough for the day at work? weekend? vacation? should I dip now or wait a little while to get the most out of it, even though I will be doing it again in an hour or so? Are all my spitters, tins, spit cleaned up and put away in a safe enough spot so I wont get caught? Can anyone tell that I have this lip in? my boss? my friends? How can i sneak away so that I can get a 20 min sesh in without missing anything or, more importantly, have anyone notice?
Anyways, I have rambled, but I wanted to put it out there for comments and for anyone that has, is, or will go through the same type of thoughts, which I am sure is just about everyone on this site at some point.
My craving tried to blind me from my goals and the reasons that I am quitting. I would be lying if I told you I didnt come close to giving in. But, my head cleared and I was able to see the craving for what it really was, an attempt to hit me while I was weak and to push me back to the shit. When you are faced with the same questions and doubt of why your putting yourself through this shit, remember what you thought about before you quit, when you head was clear. Might be a good idea to write that shit down so you can pull it out later, when the craving prevents you from seeing it.
I am proud to say that I made it through that night and I am still quit. I have a face full of seeds (btw, the flamas flavor of frito lays seeds gives you a burn which is pretty great) and not of dip. I am 6 hours from hitting that 72 hour marker and having the nic out of my system. I know I am no where near done at that point, but I will take the milestone.
Kevin
Awesome thoughts Kevin. Good job getting this into your intro. One point that helps me with the mind games is remembering that I really did not "enjoy" dip and dip only relieved the stress that it created in the first place. Nicotine is a big fucking lie. It makes you think you enjoy it but you really enjoy relief from the withdrawals that it created. As a drug addict, your drug tells you how much you need it. Its just a lie. The longer the time since your last "fix", the easier it is to ignore the lie. It is a bit of an emotional roller coaster along the way, but it eventually gets so much easier. You just keep doing that one day at a time thing and don't give into the lie. Never again, for any reason, not once.
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yo recruit...keep up the good work. One thing i would advise, and the only reason is that i did these things, is i would start every morning a little differently then you did when you dipped. Like there was no way i would run with a dip in my mouth so i get up and run some. I change the path every time. Golf was always kind of a trigger for me so one morning i got up and went to the driving range before work...hitting a bunch of balls at a fairly quick pace will increase your heart rate a bit and clear out the fog...it also will start to eliminate the correlation of the two.
Anyhow, those are my 2 cents...quit on brother...btfu
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Doing great man! Nicotine is working its way out of your system now. It is fighting you hard and filling your mind with confused romantic memories of tobacco. Romantic thoughts should be reserved for that fiancé of yours, not an expensive cancer causing plant. Give it a few more days and I bet the love turns to rage. In the meantime, your only requirement for all of us is to post roll first thing in the morning and continue to be a man of your word. So far, so good. See you tomorrow!
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this is what Bean said to me early in my quit....
Remember to turn the tables on the Nic Bitch. Conciously decide that you will enjoy the withdrawal symptoms...they are the feeling of healing. When you get a particularly strong crave, or you're about the rip the head off someone for saying something horrible to you like, "Good morning, Trauma." Just smile and casually ask the Nic Bitch, "Is that the best you got?"
Embrace the withdrawal syptoms...remember them...
pm me if you need some digits
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But your still here, and your still quit. And guess what thatÂ’s not the last time your mind is going to try to trick you into poisoning it just one more time. You see we have all sort of developed a multiple personality. ThereÂ’s us and then thereÂ’s Dipper. Mr. Dipper is pissed at the real you, he has been allowed to be the one in charge for a while now and you have come back out of repression and said no! I am the personality that is running this show! This is a mind game that will last us awhile (possibly our entire lives). But as many of the bad ass quitters I read on here say we are addicts, we donÂ’t have to be slaves. And with each time our real personality denies Mr Dipper he gets a little weaker making it a little easier for us to say no. It gets easier Bro.
You asked what will help though, not why it is happening lmao, so a tool for you when Dipper comes to your door, remember you posted your promise, maybe tomorrow, but youÂ’ve already promised not today, you gave your word to all of us and you better damn well mean it! tis why Erussell post roll early as hell, in case dipper comes a knocking before roster crows!!!!!
I quit with you man!
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Where in the Hell are you at recruit23. Traumagnet and I r looking for your missing ass. Anyone got recruits number? If so call him immediately ask him what is going on.
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Where in the Hell are you at recruit23. Traumagnet and I r looking for your missing ass. Anyone got recruits number? If so call him immediately ask him what is going on.
I text him erussell. No reply. I think he may be living it up in canville. Maybe he'll want to move out for good one day. I know canville looks promising because it makes you believe it is. All i can say is living there sucks. Living there, you might as well be in jail. Your told when to eat, sleep and wake. Worst of all canville controls your emotions. Tells you how happy and sad you can be. It also tells you how to act. Your life expectancy is not as long there also. It promises a long and slow death. Its not cheap either. Wish i had all that money back.
I'm so glad i moved. Freedom is so nice.
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Where in the Hell are you at recruit23. Traumagnet and I r looking for your missing ass. Anyone got recruits number? If so call him immediately ask him what is going on.
I text him erussell. No reply. I think he may be living it up in canville. Maybe he'll want to move out for good one day. I know canville looks promising because it makes you believe it is. All i can say is living there sucks. Living there, you might as well be in jail. Your told when to eat, sleep and wake. Worst of all canville controls your emotions. Tells you how happy and sad you can be. It also tells you how to act. Your life expectancy is not as long there also. It promises a long and slow death. Its not cheap either. Wish i had all that money back.
I'm so glad i moved. Freedom is so nice.
Canville is full of a bunch of lying dirty whores! Nic bitch rules the town and Sucks the life out of everyone! Fuck canville.................
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Where in the Hell are you at recruit23. Traumagnet and I r looking for your missing ass. Anyone got recruits number? If so call him immediately ask him what is going on.
I text him erussell. No reply. I think he may be living it up in canville. Maybe he'll want to move out for good one day. I know canville looks promising because it makes you believe it is. All i can say is living there sucks. Living there, you might as well be in jail. Your told when to eat, sleep and wake. Worst of all canville controls your emotions. Tells you how happy and sad you can be. It also tells you how to act. Your life expectancy is not as long there also. It promises a long and slow death. Its not cheap either. Wish i had all that money back.
I'm so glad i moved. Freedom is so nice.
Canville is full of a bunch of lying dirty whores! Nic bitch rules the town and Sucks the life out of everyone! Fuck canville.................
Recruit logged on last night but no post so I suspect your right that he's spending the long weekend in canville.