Day 70 update:
Some weeks are better than others. Days 60-70 have been tough, hard to focus and sleepy at work, not getting good sleep. I don't get the hard hammering craves anymore, just soft gentle ones. It's like the nic bitch is trying to sneak back into my life, speaking sweetly "wouldn't things be better with me in your life? You can focus, you can stay awake". The answer is hell no. I don't miss the hot stinky spitters in the car (thanks Skol for that reminder), sneaking dips, raw lips, and all the money I've saved. I'm giving myself the best gift ever, and feel more free, every day.
A couple of people have asked why I have such a stupid name, kodiakdeath. I signed up a week before I quit, which was planned, and maybe stupid, but that's another story. At the very moment I had to pick my username, the only thing that was going through my mind was that my brain was soaked with nicotine. Fucking drowning in chew spit. It was the worst feeling, like my body was dead from chew all those years. Every time I looked at my username I wanted to be reminded of that moment, that feeling. That using this horrible thing called kodiak felt like death, and that once I quit I was never going to use this shit again. So kodiakdeath.
