These last 100 days have been tough, but I am here on the first floor because I WANTED to be. In my profession of being a U.S. Army Soldier, it is staggering the number of dippers, smokers, and vapers there are in this job. Nicotine, energy drinks, and 800mg Ibuprofen became the norm just to get through the day. Quitting smokeless tobacco in an environment where over half of my coworkers are nicotine addicts is not an easy gig, and the temptations are astronomical. That’s probably why I had been a slave to the can for almost 16 out of the last 19 years I have been in the service.
You see, I have been down this road before almost ten years ago. I was a cocky individual who thought he had this quitting business figured out.I made it to the HOF with KTC before, but it came crashing down in a single night, because I made some very bad choices and let the NIC bitch walk right over me, and flip me off on the way out. I was a dumbass and didn’t reach out to vast number of amazing people I became friends with, when I was struggling mentally and physically. 140+ days gone instantly for being way too cocky and getting complacent in my quit. Word to the wise, if you feel like caving, its NEVER worth it! It’s a long weary road to gain the trust of your fellow quitters back again after doing some shit like that, and you better grow some thick skin for all the lashings you are going to receive because of it. Do me a favor, and CALL someone before you make that trip to the convenience store or try to bum a dip from your buddy, because you are having a shitty day. Whatever you do, don’t throw away hard days in the trenches of being quit like I did, by putting that cat shit in your lip. You are better than that. Anyways…. enough about the past.
On March 13th, 2022, I dragged my sorry ass to the doorstep of KTC, took a deep breath, and was welcomed into what is now the No Lip Turd Herd of June 2022 quit group. I do believe it was Aquaman who helped me unfuck my old account and get me back in the game of quit. I was exhausted from carrying a can of worm dirt around every day, that felt like being chained to an anvil. That’s a massive weight to bear for so long, but because I was an addict, I just kept dragging that fucking thing with me everywhere I went. My addiction was so bad, I would have dragged my balls across two miles of broken glass, to merely catch a whiff of an open can of Copenhagen Wintergreen. It literally consumed my entire being, and turned me into an irritable, tobacco juice spitting, almost two can a day monster. Talk about some bull shit right there. I owed it to myself, my amazing wife, and my three beautiful children to end this train wreck. I just wanted it all to end …. and this was the ONLY place I knew that could get me back on the right track.
A solid foundation is necessary for building a strong quit journey. KTC provided that strong foundation, so I was able to build the walls and ceiling needed to support my first floor of quit. All of you in this community provide the motivation to keep me nicotine and tobacco free…ODAAT of course. I mean that. I learned not to think about yesterday or worry about tomorrow, l only worry about being quit today. Yesterday is already gone, and if I don’t make it through today, then there is not going to be a tomorrow. Someone once said to me that you must be a selfish quitter, because at the end of the day you only have to answer to yourself. Don't get me wrong I can be a selfish person sometimes, but I would rather go through my quit journey as a team like we do here at KTC. We need backup to help protect our quits, and we should be helping others to protect their quits as well. Being selfish and going it alone is not how KTC operates. And we can’t forget the one thing that brings everything together, and that’s accountability. I ask everyone here to continue to keep me accountable, and I promise I will do the same for you.
Proud Member of the No Lip Turd Herd June 22 Group
Kstampfly “Out”
https://www.killthecan.org/soldiering-through-my-quit-odaat/