Okay, after 28 days, I think I'm starting to get the hang of this site. Maybe it's because some of the fucking fog has lifted for just a second and I can think a little more clearly, albeit not fully.
I'm still not sure if I'm posting in the right spot, but whatever, I don't give a shit, I'm writing this for myself right now to be honest. Today is day 29, and while it's not any sort of KTC milestone or anything, it is a huge milestone for me. I've never quit before. I've only stopped as all of us here have done before. No new news for anyone here. However, I've never stopped for more than 28 days, and I've NEVER quit. For 38 years, I've NEVER quit. Until now, and now I'm on day 29. New fucking territory for me my friends. It does not sound like a lot, but to me it's fucking huge. I'm not vacant of craves, I still think about the shit, I cringe every time I fill up my truck with gas because I'm fighting off the temptation to walk into the c-store and see the wall behind the gal at the counter screaming like a billboard in Vegas at me. I'm still suffering. But the point is, I'm not going to cave because I've been through the physical trauma of withdrawal. The bitch has been exorcised from my body. She's still in my brain though, and only time, determination, and the support of people on this site will shrink her into oblivion. The key for me is to know that the nic bitch will live there forever in my brain, I'm an addict and that's the way it is, but I can put that little c*nt in a cage and keep the key under my control. She'll wake up from time to time and try to seduce me with promises, but I know better. In 38 years I've given her the key WAY too many times. This time is over, O V E R. I'm grateful for this day, the people I've met here in the past 28 days have changed my life. No nicotine today. That's all I have to do. Everything is in my head from this point on. 29 days and I'm now in new territory. I'm quit for today. I read this site every damn day and it's keeping me quit. - Wolfe out.
Your doing great Wolf and just keep blogging it out. We all have different milestones that pertain to our quit. Mine was almost daily after 30 plus years of use and now I am at 346 days. I also never have been this far before and still have the craves and thoughts about it daily. Everyday is win to an addict and that is what we are. Glad your here and you need anything let me know. I tried to create something different here and screwed up. Oh well I think we get the point.
