Hey everyone. Longtime listener, first time caller.
I want to first point out that, even though I have grown up in the age of technology, I missed the class on how to navigate/ participate in online forums, so I am sorry if I end up asking overly answered questions, or post to the wrong sub folder or what not.
That being said congratulations to any and all who have successfully quit and continue to stay free. I see some of the users listed Quit Day's on here and it's almost beyond comprehension how long you all have made it.
I have been dipping for 10 years. Simply put, I'd like to not do that anymore. I'd like to one day tell someone I haven't had a dip in 10 years. I'd like to one day have a favorite pair of pants that still have the back left pocket attached.
So today is my quit day. To be completely honest, the reason I decided to quit is kind of out there. I started shopping around for life insurance and was appalled that by checking the box next to 'Tobacco User', it increased my monthly premium by $107; could have been a mere $40/ month. That's not even an exaggeration. So then I had a small moment where my mind snowballed into this thought of how ironic it was that the same reason I had to pay almost 3x the norm, could actually end up being the reason my widow receives the insurance pay out one day. It was a pretty morbid full circle moment. So I threw my 2 full cans down into the slough, and then called myself a scumbag because I actually had a fleeting thought of climbing down there and getting them.
I have a lot of apprehension about quitting. A lot of fear about failure. I hate to fail. I hate to not be able to conquer a challenge and it's scary because I know this is really going to test that. I have tried to quit before and failed, and I hate the thought of telling people I quit, only to see them later having 'relapsed'.
But, along with all those fears there is excitement about the prospect of my life without tobacco. No more worrying about where my next spitter is coming from or whether I need to chug this coke to get it, or how long this can will last me. No more having to take a dip out before trying to put the moves on the wife, 'boob' .
I have never sought out or enlisted any sort of support group, or help, so I have that going for me this time around.
Anyway, I look forward to traveling this road with you all, learning what works and what doesn't. I look forward to having a place where I can go post a cry fest about my headaches and withdraws, because I doubt my wife wants to hear it again. Maybe, if I'm lucky, I can help out a fellow former dipper along the way.
//Emac