Day 5

[Skoal Crusher]

Closing in on the HOF. The past month or so has been kind of rough on me, a little depressed about the cold Midwest weather setting in and I'm sure the havoc that nicotine has wreaked on my brain hasn't helped. I have "quit" a couple of times in the last several years for a decent amount of time and I was just remembering that I caved around the Holidays. That won't be happening this time around...HOF here I come.

A couple of truths that have been shared on this site:

1. There is that hurdle around Day 70 that you have to clear
2. Seasonal triggers are a real thing
3. You have to quit nicotine and not just the delivery method. In past "quits" I would have an occasional cigarette and then I would talk myself into some snus and then 2 weeks later I'm stuffing my face full of Skoal Mint. Wonder how many on KTC has been through that cycle a time or two?

[Skoal Crusher]

Had a chance to visit with my brother-in-law yesterday at my niece's confirmation. He was so proud to show me his new vaporizer and to tell me he is quitting smoking. I didn't really have the heart to tell him that he hasn't quit at all. I told him he should go cold turkey and he couldn't fathom doing that. I told him I know a few guys and gals that have done it.

[Steakbomb18]

Hey Crusher, this was my first time reading your intro and I can't tell you how much it was like looking in the mirror and seeing my former self. The secrecy, the lies, the health concerns, failed quits and ultimately the desperation. I also told my wife about my quit 2 weeks in, showed her the site, and posted roll in front of her. I needed those 2 weeks to show her that this wasn't going to be another empty promise. By bringing her in early and having her part of my accountability just made my foundation all the stronger.

You're now at a point where you can look back at your former self through the eyes of a quitter. It's a pathetic view (and it needs to be...you don't ever want to be that guy again), but that view when you look forward is pure bliss. I can't even begin to tell you how rewarding quitting dip has been for me on so many levels. Just trust me when I tell you, posting roll is the biggest gift you can give yourself. A guy in my group just decided to stop giving himself that daily gift (after 1400 days) and if he's here posting a day 1, I won't be surprised.

Congratulations on passing that 30 day mark. It gets a lot better from here and every day thereafter.

[Jeff W]

Definitely know the feeling....you can't NEVER have one. You just can't have one today!

[Skoal Crusher]

Dundippin  Cavman - Thanks for the advice and support. I will not take this for granted, I get that fleeting crave nearly every day and it nearly crushes my soul for a split second to know that I can never have just one...and then it's gone. It is more of a sadness than a crave really, kind of hard to explain but I'm sure others have felt it.

The best part of my day is posting roll and texting the 4-5 people for which I have digits because I know I will be nic free that day.

[Dundippin]

Skoalkrusher,

Congrats on your success to-date. I echo previous sentiments that you have to keep your guard up. My colleagues and I still get craves when we least expect it. Especially around milestone dates.

So be ready to pat yourself on the back and say you have licked this thing only to turn around and feel some huge crave come on.

As long as you expect it and realize it is part of the quit cycle you will be ok.

I quit with you today.

Dundippin - day 757

[CavMan83]

SkoalCrusher,

Awesome job on 30 days bubba! Keep the faith, it will continue to get better.....keep your guard up and do NOT get complacent....I've seen complacency kill a goodly number of quits. I don't want yours to be one of them! Proud of your accomplishments to date!

[Skoal Crusher]

Should have known there would be a banana butt sex emoticon on this site. 'clap'

[Jeff W]

Wanted to share an update on my quit as well as document this process for posterity sake. The quit has been really great and my mindset is a lot more positive now that I'm not trying to hide something from everyone, being deceitful is not good for one's sense of self worth and well being. I will admit that the first 2 weeks were pretty bad as far as the fog and I still find it hard to concentrate and be productive but it is getting much better. I remember on the 3rd day being so overwhelmed at work that I wanted to crawl under my desk and cry...or just go home. That is some pretty scary shit, to know that dip affects the brain and body that much, that you can barely cope with life during the withdrawal period.

I finally told my wife this past weekend, of course she knew that I was dipping though, just not the extent of my addiction and deceit to get my fix. She was very proud of my decision but incredibly sad to learn about how much I withdrew from the family to feed this thing. I never ninja dipped around her because I'm not a crazy person but I did around my kids, my wife was pissed off about that. I tried to hide it but my oldest one is just old enough to have catch me spitting a few times and know something is up. Obviously that didn't stop me at the time, but makes me feel pretty low now...the wife agrees.

I told my wife about this site and how it works and that I know it sounds incredibly dumb that a promise to strangers somehow works when I kept breaking my promise to her...but it does. I told her not to be alarmed when I get weird texts from people with strange names, it's just their daily promise as well as mine to them. She asked that I start texting her too which I started doing yesterday. She replied that if I get to Day 365 that she will let me PIITB, she better keep her promise because I'm getting there B)B

Hell yeah dude! My family doesn't understand how KTC works, my wife used to tell me......."well why didn't you just promise me a long time ago?" Any how Butt Sex! 'BanDog'

[Skoal Crusher]

Wanted to share an update on my quit as well as document this process for posterity sake. The quit has been really great and my mindset is a lot more positive now that I'm not trying to hide something from everyone, being deceitful is not good for one's sense of self worth and well being. I will admit that the first 2 weeks were pretty bad as far as the fog and I still find it hard to concentrate and be productive but it is getting much better. I remember on the 3rd day being so overwhelmed at work that I wanted to crawl under my desk and cry...or just go home. That is some pretty scary shit, to know that dip affects the brain and body that much, that you can barely cope with life during the withdrawal period.

I finally told my wife this past weekend, of course she knew that I was dipping though, just not the extent of my addiction and deceit to get my fix. She was very proud of my decision but incredibly sad to learn about how much I withdrew from the family to feed this thing. I never ninja dipped around her because I'm not a crazy person but I did around my kids, my wife was pissed off about that. I tried to hide it but my oldest one is just old enough to have catch me spitting a few times and know something is up. Obviously that didn't stop me at the time, but makes me feel pretty low now...the wife agrees.

I told my wife about this site and how it works and that I know it sounds incredibly dumb that a promise to strangers somehow works when I kept breaking my promise to her...but it does. I told her not to be alarmed when I get weird texts from people with strange names, it's just their daily promise as well as mine to them. She asked that I start texting her too which I started doing yesterday. She replied that if I get to Day 365 that she will let me PIITB, she better keep her promise because I'm getting there B)B

[4TheWin]

Ninja dipper...crap they have a lot of clever terms for sh*t around here...I guess being clever helps people quit.

Anyway, I liked your intro dude and am glad you are going strong. The way you characterized things in your first post is remarkably similar to how I feel about things.

Proud to quit with you today.

[Skoal Crusher]

Day 10 of my quit, hasn't been too bad with the exception of Day 3 which sucked balls. For whatever reason yesterday was pretty rough, didn't get anything done at work as I couldn't concentrate for more than a second. Had some fleeting craves but not like I was ready to hop in my truck and head to the c-store.

Stay strong fellow quit brothers.

[scottludwig]

22 year ninja dipper here. I (we) know how you feel. What you'll find out is that we all have lived very similar lives because we are addicts feeding an addiction. You've made a wonderful choice for yourself so post roll everyday, early, no excuses, read everything you can, and be ready to QLF all day long. One day at a time is how we do it and we don't do it by ourselves. Good to be quit w you.

[jeffw]

You've made the right choice. As a former Ninja dipper I am very familiar with the the stupid shit we do to feed the addiction. The lost family time, the lost work opportunities, and the list goes on. There are lots of us Ninja dippers here so don't be afraid to reach out. Get busy posting roll in December and get some digits to keep yourself and the rest of us accountable for our quits.

[Skoal Crusher]

Hi all - I am on Day 5 of my quit. Had my first dip in middle school and have been at it pretty much ever since. I've stopped using for around a year a couple of times but I caved. I'm sick and tired of chew, it has ruled my life for far too long and I don't want it to define me any longer.

I have hidden it from my wife and kids because I don't want to be confronted, although I think they know but have just given up on me. I have dipped at work and of course had to hide it from my co-workers. I am tired of hiding from people just to satisfy this addiction. I'm tired of slinking off to the basement to "watch football" just so that I can feed my addiction when I could be spending time with my family. How many professional relationships have I damaged because I don't want to talk to people or go out to lunch because I would rather chew.

I'm sick of the sores on my mouth and chest pains from my heart working so hard. I'm tired of hiding chew cans and spitters from people, how embarrassing and degrading. I'm through with driving all over town to find who wasn't out of Skoal mint pouches, or to find who had the best prices, or to not be seen over and over by the same clerk.

This is not the life I envision for myself and I'm ready to quit that life. I have come here in the past to read what others are going through but never felt the need to join and post. I have failed in the past and now I'm here today, first step in accountability.