Quit has been good. Im proud to say im 14 days quit and going string. no looking back.
This past Friday, I played in my buddies annual golf tournament fundraiser. He, a few of our friends who were there and I had our first dip 20+ years ago. I went prepared with Smokey MT knowing Skoal and Kodiak would be around me all day. I made it known 1st thing I was done and I had my fake stuff to help me get through the day and they were respectful of my quit. However, im sue they were thinking, here we go again, he is quitting again. Well, so be it, cant blame them. I know im done for sure, 100%. Anyway, one of the wife's was there helping out at the tournament and hung out with us the last few holes and saw i was "dippin" with the boys (she assumed it was the skoal/kodi). The next day, after a long afternoon/night of drinking after the tournament, I was ready to talk with my wife about the quit. I started to talk to her and she said, "I know, you dipped yesterday". You see, we had a blow up a couple months ago because she thought I had quit over a year ago and and rightfully so since I told here i had whenever she asked me. Anyway, my friends wife didn't rat me out, she just didn't know i had been hiding the dip all of those year and especially the last few months so she had casually mentioned it when she and my wife were talking. So i explained to my wife it was the Smokey Mt i had with me at the golf tournament and that i had quit 12 days ago. She initially was upset that it had only been 12 days but then quickly congratulated me on being 12 days clean. I explained to her KTC and posting roll and all of the names and numbers i had now and showed her at lest a dozen texts i had on my phone just from that morning from all of the 9/14 crew and some of the vets (Oconnordan, evil_won, sporticus, antisaint, loot, golfpro9696, ribfulton1, spitstickler, derv88, cmark, grizzlyhasclaws, knockout, treg44, zquitter) who had been texting all morning. She was excited. I explained the Smokey Mt and mentioned there was one issue i had to deal with, she blurted, "i dont care of its $50 a can", i laughed and i said no, its just not convenient to get, only Walmart. She laughed and said she didnt care. She will buy for me and i said we can buy online. Later that day, i showed her the KTC site while i was checking and posting. She read through the spousal section. She gets it. She is amazing and is an angel for putting up with me and my addiction for so many years. She is one part of the KDL acronym, the other 2 are my daughters.
Sleep is better, craves not so much but random triggers make me think about it because the habit of dippin after i eat or am working in the yard or playing golf or drinking. I dont necessarily crave it, just think about or maybe thats the crave. the key is not having any around, i cant dip if i dont have any. I consciously make the choice to not go buy any. When igo buy Smokey Mt, i see the racks of cans and have no desire to buy the real stuff. Im to the point now it grosses me out. When i smelt the Kodiak/Skoal at the golf tournament it almost mad me gag.
Thank you to the 9/14 quit crew and the vets like sporticus and loot, you guys are great. Thank you to those i have PM'd with over the past 2 weeks.
KDLforever - 14; NNT!
