Hi everyone,
I started dipping about ten years ago, and immediately fell in love with nicotine. I got it anywhere I could: cigarettes, cigars, and dip. I always knew that I had a problem with it, but didn't want to do anything serious about it (I had little spells of quitting, but nothing past a few months.) Over the last 5 years I became strictly a dipper at .5 to 1 can per day.
I felt like garbage every damn day. between the feelings of guilt/shame and the physical aspects, I've been a very unhappy person with my daily choice. I pride myself as a disciplined person with good work ethic. These traits seem to be useless against nicotine addiction. I thought about quitting every single day, even came up with strategies, but the "right" opportunity never came up: "I'll do it after my undergrad is done" "ill do it after the holidays" "I'll do it when I'm X years old." The most recent, "I'll do it after nursing school, I can't handle the stress of both quitting and school."
I am ready to quit for real and I have no excuses anymore. I am a week into my last semester of nursing school and 22 days quit (jan 28).
I also have my first child on the way, but I know quitting can't be about that. When it comes to nicotine, I could talk myself to the ledge no matter how much external motivation to live I had.
I began writing in a journal about it. I wrote that I need to be held accountable by family and friends (my wife is on board, just have to talk to the rest of them). I also wrote that I needed a support group.
So here I am ready to talk the talk and walk the walk with all of you.
I feel confident and good right now, but I've been this far before and I know that it will get harder. I need your help.
